Future Talk
by Graphospasm
Summary: Dying didn't spell the end for me; it gave me a new shot at life. All I have to do to keep that shot is protect a demonic book from a madman, not let anyone know I'm from another world, and try to change destiny completely. What could possibly go wrong? OC
1. Chapter 1: Death For My Birthday

**NOTE **_(Please, PLEASE read this):_ **The 'excerpt' of bad fan fiction found within the following chapter was written (with much grinding of teeth) by me, and it is not meant to mock any particular author or story on this website. Any and all resemblance to real persons or stories is entirely coincidental and should be thought of as such. Also, my writing ability should not be judged by the aforementioned excerpt, as all mistakes were intentionally made by yours truly.**

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 01:

"Death for My Birthday"

* * *

_"I love you." She whispered, violet orbs filing with tears. "But... I don't know if you love me. You abandoned me for Yukina. I know she's you're sister, but..."_

_Hiei swept the emotionally fragille, physically mighty, longhaired beauty into his arms. "You are the only one for me!" He exclaimed, crimson hues bright with love. "Yukina means nothing to me compared to you!"_

_She sniffed against his strong manly shoulder. "Even though I'm halfdemon halfhuman with a vampire for a grandmother?" She asked tearrfully. _

_"Yes." He sollemnly intoned, wiping her bangs (deep raven black with blood red highlights) out of her bright blue and purple and green rainstorm-colored eyes. "I would give up my life for you. You are beautifull and strong and I will protect you the way you're dead parents never could. You have had such a tragic life. Let me be your night in shinning armor, Amora Lestina Hathway."_

_"Oh, yes." She cried, and with a giggle she added "Not that I need protecting. I'm the ruler of the demon world! That tournament was a cinch, and your my king!"_

_And with a smile Hiei kissed her because he had never met anyone as perfect as Amora before and it goes without saying that they lived happily ever after._

_The End._

As I picked my way through an author's note that was longer than the fic's final chapter, swimming through 'thank you's, ZOMGs, and review responses, I felt my temples begin to pound.

_'How the shit do people write this swill, let alone have the balls to put it on the internet?' _I thought as I opened the review box. With hands that were sweaty from clutching at the plastic computer mouse for more than an hour (at one hundred and ten chapters, this fic had been long, pointless, and painful to get through; clutching at the mouse in desperation was to be expected) I typed out a review. A scathing one.

_This fic is a bastardization of both Yu Yu Hakusho and Hiei's character, _I wrote. _I can't even begin to count the ways this fic is bad, but let me try. The word 'orb' is not a substitute for 'eye', and neither is 'hue'. 'Hue', for the record, means 'color,' not eye, and "your" and "you're are two TOTALLY DIFFERENT THINGS. Your dialogue is not formatted correctly, either, so pick up a freaking book and see how it's really done! Also, Hiei would never act like this because he would never A), talk that much, and B), talk in such a poetic, romance-novel sort of way. He's not tender and sweet, he's gruff and straightforward! Plus, no Mary Sue like yours would ever interest him! She's too chipper and bubbly, and that tragic past of hers? HA! Don't make me laugh. Turn on the news sometime. What makes you think that aqua eyes and that godawful hair color could ever be pretty or natural? Let me guess—you're a wannabe goth fourteen year old, right? And her HERITAGE: nothing screams MARY SUE like having a vampire for a grandma (vampires aren't even in YYH canon, for christ's sake!). And the worst atrocity? YOU SAY THAT HIEI DOESN'T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT YUKINA. You have major issues to work out. Grow the hell up and get the hell out of that fantasy world of yours, please, and come back to the REAL world of Yu Yu Hakusho._

My mouse hovered over the 'submit' button for a long time before I moved for the delete key, holding it down until my entire work of angry criticism (NOT a flame because I gave her _reasons_ for the anger, of course) disappeared from existence letter by letter. It took many moments of deep breathing to get my raging emotions under control, but once I could look at the review box without grinding my teeth I began to type anew.

_Great job sticking with this fic until the end! _I wrote. _You write fairly well, but all of us can improve more. For instance, you use the word 'hue' instead of 'eye', but 'hue' actually means 'color,' not 'eye!' Whoopsies! I've made that mistake before, too! Also, about the format of your dialogue..._

After reconstructing the content of my angry review into a more neutral and supportive dose of helpful and constructive criticism, I clicked 'submit.' The familiar orange writing telling me that the review would take a while to show up made me sigh. How long had I been doing this pointless, endless perusal of bad fan fiction? Three years? Four? I was too lazy to actually check the date on my profile, but I nonetheless wondered what drove me to subject myself to such bad writing and then make _nice_ about it year after year after year.

I clicked the author's profile link on a whim, and I was assaulted by the typical "If you're the one teen who doesn't smoke pot, copy and paste this into your profile!" type of junk. Scrolling through it proved to be a forty-second process, one that led me to the fifteen fics the author had posted. I lingered on the review counts. The atrocious 'Bleeding Heart Felt Love' I had just reviewed had two hundred giggling comments, and my heart sank. My own fic (singular; I only had one) had less than fifty reviews ranging from the constructive to the vapid to the infuriatingly vague. Sure, my fic didn't have too many chapters yet (ten chapters or so, and twice-monthly updates) but it was better written and had a more original plot by far... right?

_I'm minoring in creative writing, _I thought vehemently. _Of course my writing is better than this. _

Grabbing my backpack out from under my seat, I stood up and pulled the bag over my shoulders. Heavy textbooks painfully tapped against my spine as I reached for my cane, and with a whistle I began to head for the library doors.

"Happy birthday, Dani!"

I shot a smile at the boy behind the checkout counter. He, like me, was a second year college student and a fellow music major, and we were both in the same Japanese class, too. We had been friends since freshman orientation, ever since he had carried me up a flight of stairs after someone had stolen my cane (lots of people did that before I told them it wasn't just an eccentric accessory and that my left foot and calf were actually shriveled from a birth defect).

"Thanks, dude," I replied, smiling.

"How old did you turn?"

"Twenty, so no, I'm not an alcohol source yet, David."

"Dammmit," he swore playfully, snapping his fingers in mock disappointment. His expression turned from amiable to confused when I signed the computer checkout list. "Hey, I thought you had a laptop."

"It broke," I said with a frustrated sigh. "Damned keyboard quite working on me."

"That must suck! I hope it gets fixed soon."

"Me, too."

"You gonna be all right walking home?" he said, glancing at the big glass doors leading outside. Night had fallen an hour or two earlier.

"Should be." I looked at my watch, which I kept on my right wrist, and I frowned. "Gotta go pretty quick, though. Mom's supposed to call me tonight."

"Be careful out there," he said. "You sure you don't wanna call Campus Safety and have them drive you home? It'd be faster." He reached for the phone on the checkout counter, but I shook my head.

"I'll be fine." I tried not to look peeved. I hated being babied. "See you tomorrow."

"See you," David said as I walked away, and after giving him one last cheerful smile I left the building.

The sweet spring air felt damp in my mouth, and my cane slipped over the slick cement. It had been raining earlier that day, making walking around campus both treacherous and a pain. But I didn't really mind. I liked the feel of the breeze as it ruffled through my unbound hair, the feel of the pavement beneath my good foot as I walked. There wasn't much on my mind. I had reviewed a story that needed it, my homework was done, my application to an ultra-competitive composition workshop—one that was supposedly going to feature an noteworthy guest professor—was finished, my mother was going to call me that night in my dorm room because it was my birthday...

The way back to the dorm took me past the athletic track, and with a wry smile I stopped to look at the red paving material and the white stripes that differentiated the running lanes. A train whistle blew in the distance.

"Hmph," I huffed. _Never gonna be me out there, _I thought, squeezing the aluminum grip of my cane. _Heck, I've never even _run_ before._ My bum leg had kept me from sports since my birth, but that didn't matter to me much. At least I had music, and writing.

The train whistle, far away but coming closer, blew again, but this time it sounded... odd, somehow, and I felt a chill make the hair on my arms stand up. A higher, more desperate sound undercut the typical shrill keen; I assumed I was hearing things.

"Aw, shut up," I said to the annoying whistle and its odd undertone, but then the screaming sound continued on its own even _after_ the train had passed. Alarm blurred the edges of my vision and adrenaline pumped as I recognized the scream as...

—as _human_.

It took me a moment to remember how to move. With growing apprehension I trekked across the track, walking toward the bleachers at the far side of the field as if pulled there by a magnet. I flinched when the screaming started again, no train-sounds masking it this time, and when the scream was cut off I tried to move a little faster, straining my neck as I looked around for the sound's source.

It didn't take me long to spot something moving in the shadows beneath the bleachers. Holding my breath, I approached the space beneath the seats, movements labored and slow, and peered into the darkness.

As my eyes adjusted to the shadows, I saw two vague shapes, one pinned and one pinning. The one on top straddled the other's waist, holding her hands above her head with one strong arm, and it took me a moment to recognize the pinned person as one of my classmates—a girl whose long blonde hair was mussed and fanning around her as she lay sprawled on the ground, mouth opening wide as she let out another terrified screech.

It did not take much longer for me to recognize just exactly what was about to happen to her.

As the man kneeling atop my classmate fumbled with the button on his fly, I took two steps into the under-the-bleachers darkness, raised my cane, and hopped forward on my good foot. My walking stick connected with the side of his head with a resounding 'thwack'; he grunted, went limp, and slumped forward. My classmate shoved her assailant off of her with an anguished cry—for the life of me, I could not recall her name as she ran past and collapsed to her knees on the pavement.

I turned around. The young woman wretched, expelling the contents of her stomach.

"You okay?" I asked, realizing as I said it that my feeble words were totally inadequate when paired with the situation at hand.

To my surprise, however, my classmate looked up at me with tear-streaked eyes and whispered: "Thank you, thank you, oh my god, _thank you_."

I held out a hand, hoping to help her get to her feet. "Let's get out of here and call the cops," I said as she reached for me, but then her eyes went wide, _so wide_, and her face went from grateful to horrified in a blink of misplaced time. A low moan and a curse drifted through the air, and as I slowly turned around I saw a large black shape lurch toward me.

Fire blossomed down my side, then, and someone—was it _me_ making that horrible sound?—screamed.

I stumbled backward, saved from falling only by the grace of my cane. I looked down. The handle of the knife between my ribs glistened like oiled leather, and when I drew breath blood bloomed across the pale pink fabric of my t-shirt in a sweet-smelling stain.

My classmate let out a wail, and I heard her feet pound away into the night. My killer, with eyes that said '_I didn't mean for it to get this far_', pulled the weapon from my burst heart and ran, too.

I put a hand to the wound as I watched him go. My fingers came away black, the color of my blood lost in the dark. I fell to my knees, cold and getting colder.

_But, _I thought as my reality disappeared in a numbing rush, _today is my birthday. _


	2. Chapter 2: It's the End of the World

Future Talk

Chapter 02:

"The End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)"

* * *

To say that I woke up would be a lie. It felt more like being born. Or, at least, it felt the way I imagined being born would feel.

The darkness of death fit me like a glove. A warm one. It cradled me in unseen arms and whispered in a voice I could not hear to_ lay still, accept this, you're home now_. I did not struggle against it. I let it drift feathery fingers over my eyelids and lips, and I think I may have smiled. There was no pain.

Not for long, anyway. What seemed like mere moments later, although it could very well have been years, a white coin of light in the distance shined harsh illumination on my face. The arms holding me recoiled from the light as a slender ribbon of luminescence descended from the small, distant sun. A fishhook in the dark, it wound around my form and yanked me upward, harshly, into a sea of light.

I may have screamed, but I can't remember.

Bright light (a more mundane kind, one that smacked of fluorescent bulbs) woke me from an actual sleep. I struggled to sit upright. Clean, starched sheets rustled about my waist as I blinked like an owl at my surroundings.

This did not make sense.

Stretching on either side of me were beds: empty, old-fashioned hospital cots made up with simple sheets and single pillows. No one slept in the beds. Harsh white walls, tiled floors, and high ceilings gave the impression of immaculate cleanliness. From the tall windows lining the long hall, darkness pressed. It seemed to be nighttime, but the blackness was so opaque that I could see nothing beyond the glass.

It was also quiet. Maddeningly, unstoppably graveyard quiet.

I pushed the sheets off my body and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. Someone had dressed me, I noticed, in a vaguely Asian-looking robe made all of white, like an incredibly lightweight kimono with no obi. I looked for my cane but did not see it. I had no shoes, which bothered me because the tile was cold beneath the soles of my feet.

My... feet?

I looked down. My left foot stood whole and hale next to my right.

A moment or so later, I remembered being stabbed. My strong legs collapsed, pitching me back onto the bed. I fumbled with the tie of my robe and wrenched it open, bearing my breasts and stomach and ribs to the world, but to my surprise I saw no wound, no bandages, no blood, simply pale skin stretching over bone and the tracery of blue veins beneath.

I retied the robe with shaking hands. _Must not have been as bad a wound as I thought,_ I thought. _But if that's the case, then why am I in a hospital? Mom must be worried sick. I didn't get to call her. Is she here? Did she fly out to take care of me?_

I tried not to remember the way the blood had looked on my hand, or the way it had spread across the fabric of my shirt.

_And how did they fix my foot?_ I added mentally, but I pushed that thought aside. I didn't want to know.

Standing, I took a few steps forward. I still walked with a limp, not trusting my new flesh, but I experienced no pain or sudden bout of sickness as I headed away from my bed. _I'm walking, _I thought. _This is... weird. _The hall stretched long before me, but a door appeared in the sea of white moments later. I stared at it, blinking. The door had simply... _existed _for me. There was no way I could have missed it.

I shrugged. _Must be tired,_ I thought as I pushed it open.

When I saw what lay beyond, however, I froze.

The word 'barren' came to mind, as did 'wasteland'. Buildings lay broken and toppled over one another like scattered building blocks. Chunks of cement lay like fallen boulders. Green clouds boiled in an orange sky. Wind that burned with heat and chemicals stung my cheeks.

I let the door fall shut.

"Horrible, isn't it?" said a voice.

I turned. Behind me stood a man much taller than I. He had long, scraggly brown hair, expressive honey-colored eyes, and tattered clothing that looked as if it came out of a samurai film. But despite his bedraggled appearance, I knew exactly who it was.

"Ko... Koenma?" I asked, eyes alighting on the 'Jr.' tattooed upon his forehead. I shook my head. "You're not real."

"Oh, I assure you, I am," he replied, and he snorted. "Well, maybe not in your reality, at any rate. I'm only 2D where you come from."

I said nothing. Koenma sighed.

"Come with me," he said. "I can explain everything."

"Okay," came my automatic response, and as he turned to go I limped along after him.

"Your name is Danielle?" he asked as we walked.

"Dani," I corrected.

"Well, Dani," said he, "are you familiar with the concept of the parallel universe?"

We had reached the other end of the hospital wing, and the doors on that end did not show me a vision of the apocalypse. They opened onto a small room that housed a desk, two folding chairs, and a small television set mounted on the wall. The desk was bare but for a small red notebook, spiral-bound and dog-eared, and a television remote. Koenma rounded the desk and sat down while I sat in the nearest seat, wondering at the stark atmosphere and his state of shabby dress. I was used to seeing him surrounded by opulence and assistants, not wastelands and white walls.

"Yeah," I said, answering his earlier question. "It's like... well, it's like your world. Worlds. The Demon Plane, the Human World, the Spirit Realm... they exist on separate planes of reality but as a cohesive unit, all governed by the same laws of physics and such. They're balanced." My words came forth without hesitation. I had discussed the Yu Yu Hakusho universe many times in fan forums. "And I suppose my world is parallel to yours, too, although I don't know in what way or anything."

Koenma nodded. "You are correct, but only in part."

"And why is that?"

"The three worlds you just discussed—my worlds, I suppose—are what I like to call a 'set' of worlds. Your world is a strange one, one that interacts with my world but never, ever crosses over into it, like an organism that never finished budding off from its parent. I suppose that it is technically in my set. And there are more sets in existence than just ours."

Interested, I leaned forward. I was in the same world set as my favorite anime? Sweet. Sweet, that is, if I wasn't just dreaming all of this. "Really?"

"As you said, the worlds in a set operate under the same laws, case in point being my—our—set and its worlds. But different sets operate under different laws, and sets rarely interact because of this." He took a deep breath. "My—our—set recently... interacted with another set. You saw the result when you looked out the door."

My breath caught in my throat. "You mean we're in the last of the Spirit World?" I asked.

Koenma shook his head. "No. We're in the last of the Human World. The Spirit World..." he paused. "The Spirit World has already fallen. The Demon World is nigh but obliterated as well, and your world... well, it could be next."

"Why?" I heard myself whisper.

Koenma picked up the TV remote. "Twenty years ago," he said, "a tome of spells called The Book of Beasts was stolen from the vaults of the Spirit World. It went missing and was recovered by my team of detectives."

"Yusuke?" I asked. _Holy crap... I'm twenty years too late to meet my favorite characters?_

"Yes," said Koenma. "We tried to take it back to Spirit World, but the Book had... _attached _itself to the Human World. I am not sure why."

I scowled at his hesitation. What did that mean? Was he hiding something?

He did not appear to notice my displeasure. "While I was researching ways to put it back in its vault," he went on, "it was used to summon beings, called Beasts, from another universe. They turned on the summoner and killed every member of my detective team before anyone knew what was happening. Then the Beasts spread throughout the Human World, killing everyone. That was the first world to fall."

It took me a moment to process that the characters from my favorite anime were all dead. Grief, white-hot and tangible, made my throat constrict, but I didn't cry. Even though it felt like I knew them, it wasn't like I really did, right?

"So why were these... _Beasts _summoned?" I asked. "Who summoned them?"

He hesitated again, I noticed. "I don't know," he carefully said, treating every world like fragile crystal. "I was not there, which is why I am still alive."

I stared at him, expecting him to go on, but he said nothing. So, I said nothing. Then I finally asked: "So what does all of this have to do with me?"

Koenma pressed a button on the TV remote. The opening theme song and animation to Yu Yu Hakusho began to play. Looking at the real, flesh-and-blood Koenma next to his 2D counterpart felt ridiculous, and I wondered vaguely how I had ever been able to stand staring at his comparably lifeless facsimile without cringing.

"After the Spirit World fell to the Beasts," he said, "I began to research other worlds. I found your world, connected very slightly to mine, where my world is a television series. Ever since then I have been waiting for someone with extensive knowledge of my world to die before their time." He waved a hand at me. "You, Dani. You died while saving another's life. You are what I have been waiting for."

That took me by surprise. "So I'm really dead?" I asked.

"Yes." He looked regretful.

"This news isn't hitting me as hard as I anticipated," I said after a few silent moments.

"It rarely does. Humans start in death. Going back to it is simply reverting to life's purest form—that of the spirit." He gestured at my leg. "You may have noticed that you are healed. Your spirit holds no deformity. Only your shell of a body possessed that inadequacy."

"Oh." A pause. "But today is my birthday. Isn't that a little unfair? I never got to talk to mom, to say goodbye!"

"Death does not wait for one last phone call," Koenma said. "It would be waiting a lot if that were the case." He smiled. "But you died a hero."

I snorted. "If that's what you want to call me, then fine. But if I was getting raped, I'd expect the same from anyone. It's not being a hero, it's being responsible." I paused. "But you still haven't told me what all of this has to do with me."

He stared at me, intent on something I could not identify, and in his eyes flickered… sorrow. "You know the characters of Yu Yu Hakusho, as it is called, very well, correct?" he said softly.

"I own all the anime, all the manga, and critique fan fiction," I said without thinking. Why did Koenma look so sad?

"You know their pasts, their loved ones, their hopes..."

"Kuwabara loves kittens and Yukina," I said. "Yusuke: a good fight and Keiko. Hiei: Yukina and a purpose. Kurama: his family and his plants. I mean, it all goes deeper than that, but…"

Koenma smiled. "I want to send you back in time and stop whoever summons the Beasts. I want you to mend the past to save the future."

I blinked at him. "ME?"

"You."

"B-but I'm just a nobody!" I protested. "I'm a cripple, I can't fight, and... and I'm no hero!"

"'It's not being a hero, it's being responsible,'" Koenma quoted, throwing my words back into my face.

I blushed. "But..."

"You're my only hope," Koenma said. (_Obi-Wan Kenobi, _I added in my head.)"Unless you go back in time and correct the events of twenty years ago, we're all doomed. Even your world is at stake."

That gave me pause—my world, my family, my best friend, all dead? "How likely is it that the Beasts... how likely is it that they'll find my world?"I asked, thinking hard.

"Very. It might take a hundred years, but..."

"Then I'll do it." I shrugged and smiled wryly, because Koenma looked surprised at my ready acquiescence. "I get to meet my favorite characters, don't I? And besides, what would I do if I didn't do this—I'd just be dead, right?"

Koenma looked up at me with bright, hopeful eyes. "Excellent," he said. "Excellent. _Thank_ you."

"Can you tell me any more than you already have?" I asked.

"Yes," he said. "The Beasts are the very essence of un-life. Physical blows won't hurt them, but strong emotions—they have the power to repel or even injure them. Find a way to harness positive emotions and you might be able to fight back."

A thought struck me. "So is there any reason why you haven't just gone back in time and destroyed the book before someone used it?"

"It can't be destroyed, and I personally can't time travel."

"Oh. Um... why not, if you don't mind my asking."

He chuckled. "Because that would be a paradox. I already exist in that time. The only reason I can send you back is because you… don't."

"Oh. Well, cool, I guess." I stood up. "So what are we waiting for? Send me back in time, dude."

He nodded. "But first we need to find you a body," he said. "Yours is dead."

"Oh." Then, remembering all the bad fan fiction I had ever read, I asked: "Do I get some crazy-strong demon body with multicolored hair and sherbet eyes?"

He looked at me like I was crazy, which for all I knew I was. "Of course not! I have a much more... malleable body in mind."

And that was when the room around us dissolved and disappeared.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_So now we know a little more about what's going on, but not to worry—more will be revealed in due time. The nature of Dani's new body is also of interest, so stay tuned! _

_Thanks to the wonderful reviewers who left me great feedback on my first chapter: VampireOnFire, Chieko Hitachiin, Tomoshibi-Chan, and DoilyRox! You guys are the greatest!_


	3. Chapter 3: Use Somebody

Future Talk

Chapter 03:

"Use Somebody"

(or "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina")

* * *

I found myself hovering at Koenma's side in midair, and I squealed as I tried to keep the hem of my white robe closed so the people fighting below me couldn't see my undressed midsection. It became apparent, however, that the people—well, demons—below us were unaware of our presence, so I relaxed and let my robe fall as it would.

"There," Koenma said, pointing. We were above a clearing, an open space among a forest of mauve-leaved trees. Four fought below us, three against one. The three were brutishly large, blue, and horned like typical Japanese _oni_; the last, lonely fighter was tall, with spindly arms, no eyes, and a gaping hole for a mouth. Fingers like massive needles as long as my leg branched from the arms as big around as a small tree, and with a shrill shriek it darted forward to swipe at an oni. But its claws barely scraped the_ oni_'s hide, and it skittered back like a frightened monkey.

"So do you want me to look like an ogre or Freddy Krueger's older, even more messed up brother?" I asked dryly.

"Sister. She's a girl." Koenma shot me a dark look tempered with pity, one I didn't understand. "Just watch."

The slender demon couched down low to the ground as the ogres advanced, and with another shriek a multitude of spines burst from its back. Its head twisted into something resembling an alligator's as its body filled out and grew larger, larger, and larger! Scales erupted everywhere else, and the lengthy fingers shortened into wickedly curved and powerfully thick claws.

"... a shape-shifter?" I managed to squeak as the now-spiked beast attacked an_ oni_.

Koenma chuckled. "I said 'malleable,' didn't I?"

But despite the shape-shifter's abilities, it soon fell to the three _oni_... but not before taking down two of them. The third, while the shifter was busy with the second, smashed his club down onto my future body's head. The shape-shifter screamed and limped away on elephantine legs, and the remaining _oni _shouted after it but did not approach, bleeding as it was from a massive wound on its chest. Once the _oni_ had trundled off into the forest, leaving his fallen comrades and dying enemy behind, Koenma grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me down to where the shape-shifter lay.

It morphed before my eyes into something vaguely humanoid, with an expressionless face reminiscent of a _Noh_ mask. Its legs had too many joints and it had small, cat-like claws on all of its eight fingers, but that did not deter Koenma from reaching out a hand to touch it lightly on the cheek. A white, wispy light gathered beneath the prince's fingers, and with a heave he threw the creature's soul out of its body.

"We'll take her back with us," he said, and once again the world dissolved.

* * *

The hospital hallway appeared around us. The shape-shifter lay comatose on its back on one of the beds, alien and tall, and looking at it made my stomach churn. I didn't want to look like that, not really.

"I thought you said you couldn't time travel," I said, trying to distract myself.

He laughed a little. "But I didn't time travel—not really, anyway. I could explain the physics of it if you want but I doubt they'll make much sense. Basically what we just did was view past events without touching them." He rubbed his hands together. "And this shape-shifter met very specific conditions that counteracted a potential paradox, which is why I could bring it back to use."

"And these... conditions... what were they, exactly? I'd hate to violate them myself."

"This shape-shifter was a recluse. This was the last time anyone ever saw it—and by _anyone_ I mean those ogres, two of which are dead and the last of which died a few days later from its injuries. Had we not stolen the shape-shifter's body, it would simply have decayed in the woods never to be seen again. We didn't mess up any timelines by taking it."

"Gotcha, no messed up timelines." I reached out a hesitant hand and poked the dead body with a finger. It felt cold to the touch. "So I'm not gonna look like this, am I?"

"Of course not." Koenma held his hands (palms down, fingers spread) over the creature. The flesh began to quake and glow, and with infinitesimal jerks it began to change. Brown hair sprouted from its bald head and the _Noh _features softened from chalk-white into pale, human skin. Lips curved into a pleasing bow-shape; the eyes into long-lashed crescents set above high cheekbones. The limbs shortened and fleshed out, and with a start I realized who it looked like.

"Hey, that's me!" I cried, delighted, but then I blushed when I realized that my new body was completely naked and forming rapidly. "Oi, close your eyes, I'm naked!"

Koenma rolled his eyes, and he said: "As if I didn't see you naked when I pulled you out of death. Your soul was more naked than this."

I gaped at him, and he smirked.

"I dressed you, too."

"You PERV!" I screeched, covering my face with my hands, but Koenma merely laughed.

"I'm the son of the lord of all creation. I think I've seen a naked body before."

My blush quieted... somewhat... but I still stood stiffly as my limbs and torso took on their natural shape... well, almost natural shape.

"My boobs aren't that big," I told Koenma, and this time I had the satisfaction of seeing his cheek's pink slightly. The aforementioned accoutrements shrank to their proper size (the change was accompanied by a mutter, something about girls and body image and favors), somewhere in the range of an average B cup, and that's when I noticed the other change Koenma had made.

"I want my leg the way it was," I said, and I received a raised eyebrow in response.

"But you can walk now," Koenma said.

I hesitated, then hopped onto my spirit's undamaged foot. The limb held me up admirably, and with a smile I jumped around in place and jogged, much to Koenma's amusement, up and down the long, bed-lined hallway outside of the office. I twirled, leaped, and danced to the tune of unheard music. Air whipped by me, beds passed in a blur, the tile sent shocks quivering up my ankles and calves and soon the soles of my feet tingled like a million roving fireflies. Soon enough, however, the joy of movement died, quashed beneath the weight of the memory of the apocalyptic world around me, and I returned to the spirit king's side.

"I love running, I think," I said as adrenaline thundered through my veins, "not that I can really tell since that was the first time I ever did it, but that leg is a part of me. As much as it hurts to let this go, I'm not sure I can be _me_ without it." I smiled up at him. "Like if someone offered to laser off that stupid face tattoo of yours, I doubt you'd do it. You wouldn't be Koenma anymore."

He glowered at me and touched the tattoo with a finger. "It's not stupid," he grumbled, "but I see your point." His hands extended again, and with a sinking sense of loss I watched as everything below my left kneecap twisted into its normal, stunted, pigeon-toed shape. My toes curled under like they always did, and my heel swelled into an oversized club of malformed bone. I almost—almost—stopped him when my foot's arch curved like a ballerina's, but as my lips quivered and my eyes filled with tears I did my best to smile. A sense of loss unlike anything I had ever felt before threatened to tear me apart from the inside out.

He saw me crying, and once the process of shaping me was complete he reached out and wiped my tears away with his thumb. "Don't cry," he murmured. "Little hero."

The tears stopped, in their time, and his hands dropped from my cheeks.

"You're different from the way you are in the anime," I said thickly.

He looked away. "I know."

"Calmer. Less... I dunno, dumb."

He glared, but then his eyes went far away. "The last two decades have been... wearisome."

I stared at him while he stared at nothing, but then his eyes came back to mine.

"So," I said, "when I save the world and everything—"

"Confident, are we?"

"Shut up. Will you be like this or will you still stay dumb?"

He smiled, but there was pain there. "Dani... I don't know how to say this..."

_That_ line never meant anything good. "Just say it."

"Saving the past won't save _me_."

I blinked at him.

"_My_ future is set in stone. You can only make a _new _future for the_ old_ me." He rubbed at the back of his neck. "By tampering with the past you will create a new future. The timeline will split into separate realities. My timeline will become isolated from the one you forge, trapping the Beasts here forever."

I didn't say anything. The tears started again, but these were for a different pain. I did not sob, I did not shake, I did not speak—I just cried, silent drops of saline pouring in twin rivers down my face.

"Don't cry for me," he said.

"Argentina," I replied, voice utterly calm. When Koenma looked mystified, I said: "'Don't Cry For Me, Argentina' is a song where I come from."

"Oh." He fidgeted but settled on using the hem of his blue robe to wipe my face. The cloth felt scratchy and smelled like dust, and I wondered at the sensation. I lacked a body. Did spirits get dirty? Could they be hurt? It sure did feel like my heart was being torn into bits.

"So, I guess this is the part where you debrief me on my mission," I said, forcing the dryness from my voice.

He nodded and let the robe fall. "You need to go into the past, integrate yourself into the detectives' circle, and keep an eye out for the Book of Beasts and the person who summons the Beasts. And you can tell no one of your involvement with the future."

"Why? Wouldn't it just be easier to tell Ko—I mean, your past self to lock the Book away before anyone can have a chance to think about using it?"

Koenma of the Future shook his head. "It got attached to the Human World, remember? It couldn't be locked away. Genkai kept it at her temple and the detectives all guarded it in turn."

"You said it was stolen from the Spirit World earlier. By whom, and did they try to get it back?"

He ran his fingers through his hair and looked pensive and... wary. Like he was afraid of saying something he shouldn't.

"Let's see..." he murmured with narrowed eyes. "A band of demons and humans stole the book originally, and they were led by a human medium who projected their ghost into the Spirit World and stole it straight out of the vault." He sucked his lips into his mouth, still thinking. "And yes, they did try to recover it once it was placed in Genkai's temple, but only after we tangled with them away from the temple a few times."

"Okay, cool. What was the medium's name?" I asked.

"I can't remember."

"Fat load of help you are."

A brown eye twitched. "I will remind you that I am a demigod."

"Eep!"

Laughter like rain poured into the hallway. "That's all I can tell you, really," he said to me, and he reached out to stroke the hair on my new body's head. "Tell you too much and you could change the timeline too drastically. I'll send you to Genkai's temple the day after the Book was returned. They'll be on high alert, so they'll find you." He shot me a dark look. "I don't think I have to warn you to be careful not to let my past self or anyone at all know about the future."

"I think I've seen enough sci-fi movies to know better than that," I said. Again, another thought struck me. How was I forgetting to ask questions like this? "What will my energy be like?"

"Hm?"

"You know, my energy. The detectives can tell humans from demons based on their energy signatures, right? So if my soul is human and my body is demon, won't they start asking awkward questions?"

I guess I said something stupid, because Koenma patted my head the way I would pat a child's. "And don't you think that's for the best?" he asked. "You'll be an enigma. Considering that you'll appear close on the heels of the Book's disappearance, they'll want to keep you around to be on the safe side of things. Otherwise they'd just send you to the city or the Demon World without a backward glance."

"And another thing," I snapped, not liking his condescension, "won't Hiei just be able to read my mind and see that I come from the future?"

That question brought on another head-pat. "I thought of that already," Koenma said. "Give me _some_ credit. I'll be putting blocks on all of the important bits, like memories of the cartoon series Yu Yu Hakusho and your meeting with me, so you won't need to worry."

I shrugged him off of me. "Hey, I have every right to worry! My neck's the one on the line." I tossed my head from side to side. "Shit! All of this waiting's making me nervous." I jumped around, hopping first on one foot and then on the other in a silly little dance. "Anything else you need to tell me before I go?"

He shook his head. "Just stop the summoner before he gets to work," Koenma said. "If you don't, you'll have to find a way to push the Beasts back, and I don't know if that can even be done." He gestured at my body on the bed. "I'll need you to get into your body, now," he said. "It will mimic your human biology to a 't', so don't worry about dealing with demon organs or anything."

Since I had seen Yusuke enter his body in the manga, I knew pretty much what to do. Climbing onto the bed was easy. I stood with my feet on either side of my body's ankles and more or less inserted my right foot into my new shell's. My spirit went into it with a pull that felt magnetic, and inch by inch I sat myself down into my new body from the hips up.

"Do I look like a centaur?" I joked as Koenma took my right hand and helped me slide my two torsos together. All but my right arm, right shoulder, and head remained outside of my body.

"Kind of," he said, squeezing my hand. "When you go in all the way you'll get put to sleep, so now's the time for final questions. Do you have any?"

I thought about it. "Just one."

"What is it?"

"Do you speak German?"

_That _sure took him by surprise. "Um, no?"

"Oh." I smiled. "Stirb nicht vor mir."

"Eh?"

I sighed. "It means 'don't die before I do.'" I met his eyes and held them with my own. "You think your world is lost, Koenma, but I don't think that at all. I'll find a way to beat back the Beasts and save you, I swear to... well, I'd swear to God, but you're right here in front of me, now aren't you?"

"Dani..."

"Yeah?"

"About your foot... your body can shape-shift."

My heart skipped a beat, making use of a very overdone cliche. "Meaning...?"

"Someday... if you can get the hang of it... running again might not be out of the question."

He grinned, but his eyes went plate-round and the smile froze as I leaned up to kiss him square across the mouth. _Payback for all the embarrassment, _I thought, _and payment for this body._ He didn't breathe until I pulled away.

"For luck," I chirped, and he went beet red with a splutter of: "Of course!"

I leaned back into my body, eyes closing as I absorbed the magnitude gift he had given me._ I can choose to run again, _I thought, and just as sleep closed over me I opened my flesh-and-blood eyes for the first and last time in that doomed world. All I could see were the tears upon his cheeks, and after that the look of hope shining in his eyes.

_

* * *

_

NOTE:

_In the next chapter, Dani gets up close and personal with everyone's favorite... whoops, not telling! _

_We know what's at stake, now. There's an insidious Book and a mystery summoner who doesn't even know he's going to destroy the world on the loose, plus an evil society bent on stealing the Book back to contend with. _

_What's in store for Dani next? Stick around to find out!_

_Many thanks to the reviewers of my second chapter: Doily Rox, VampireOnFire, and Tomoshibi-chan!_


	4. Chapter 4: Naked

Future Talk

Chapter 04:

"Naked"

(or "You Don't Know Me")

* * *

I woke up naked. No handy dandy not-quite-kimonos for me, no sir. Just a bed of moss growing on a boulder in the shade of a huge tree, sunlight playing across my skin in dapples made by the leaves overhead.

Sitting up, I winced when my head spun like a top on Hanukah. My palms slicked over the moss and came away stained, and with a laugh I held them to my face and inhaled the scent of green and growing things.

"It's good to be alive," I said as I laughed with the sheer joy of feeling blood pumping through my veins. I scrambled to my feet, mindless of my nakedness, and—

And I fell when my deformed foot screamed in sudden pain.

The rock lay at an angle, so when I fell I slid down its sheer surface to land in a drift of leaves at its base. They cushioned my fall and kept me from hitting my foot again, but when I finally recovered from the jarring slide I had to grit my teeth and will the throbbing in my heel and toes to die down.

Putting weight on that damned foot had hurt me since I was a child. I usually wore a metal brace and a special shoe that was specifically molded to the contours of my deformity, providing stability to an otherwise unstable limb. But without those items... well, I guess a proper analogy would be to shove an irregularly shaped glass statue at a sheet of inflexible metal. The statue (AKA: my foot) would break long before the metal would, and putting any sort of weight on that foot is excruciating.

"You couldn't drop me here with a _cane _at the very freaking least?!" I screamed at the Future Koenma in frustration, and a few frightened birds above me took flight. But, as resourceful as I was, I levered myself out of my leafy bed and sat on the rock, leaving my feet to dangle in the air as I searched for a stick.

As I looked, I took stock of my surroundings (it seemed I was doing a lot of that, lately). There wasn't much to see, just massive, mossy trees and low-lying ferns. The rock was the only one I could locate, foliage dominating most of the landscape. I could tell that it was daytime from the amount of light filtering through the canopy above, but other than that I had no way of knowing what to expect.

A stick—a good, thick one with a crook at the end—presented itself most handily, but it was at least thirty feet away, and over uneven terrain. The L-shaped head of it protruded out from a bush, like a meerkat scouting for danger. With a sigh I cannon-balled into the leaf pile and scrambled across the ground on my hands and knees. Roots thicker than my thigh and ferns taller than I was when I stood upright made me take detour after detour, and I ended up getting lost once or twice in my quest for the perfect walking stick. When such instances occurred I pulled myself up the nearest tree to get a better vantage point, so I never misplaced my way entirely. Still, the process was a major pain and a half.

What sucked the most, however, was finding out that the 'perfect' stick was only half as tall as I needed it to be.

"Goddammit," I muttered as I used the stick to hobble forward. I had to bend over at the waist to use the thing, and despite the fact that no one was around I felt self conscious about how... well, granny-like I looked. Still, despite my misgivings, I was grateful not to have to crawl. My knees were caked with dirt, as were my hands and the tips of my unbound hair. The soil was moist from plentiful rainfall and the shade-giving canopy. "Where the hell am I going, anyway?"

And so, hours of aimless wandering began. The passage of time was not something I could keep track of, but I stopped often to rest and to look for more sticks. None, however, appeared, and it was only when I found a huge tree that had fallen on its side that I stopped to sit down for more than just a short break. My throat was dry and my legs hurt, especially my left one, and my left shoulder was killing me! I had put too much weight on it for far too long.

As I settled myself down on the middle of the fallen trunk, leaping to get onto the object that was taller than my breasts, I did not relish the way the rough bark cut into my backside. I absently poked at my sore shoulder. Mom had always rubbed it for me when I came home from high school complaining of tight muscles, and my roommate—who considered herself something of a massage artist—had enjoyed using me as a test subject for rubdowns. Who was she going to experiment on now that I was... well, dead? Would she get a new roommate? And my mom had had severe empty nest syndrome when I went off to college. What would finding out that her only child was dead do to her?

Panic gripped me for the first time since I learned of my demise. My breathing hitched, but I did not cry. Thoughts of Mom and Dad and the rest of my family flashed through my head. The death of a child was not something any parent should have to live through, and the ironic thought of a comatose Atsuko at Yusuke's funeral popped into my head. _Of all the animes to wind up in..._

_Good thing I checked the organ donor box when I got my driver's license, _I thought, and I giggled madly. But this was no laughing matter. My parents were sure to be heartbroken. Miserable. Inconsolable.

The tears started, then, and with a sob I pulled my good leg up to my chest, letting my malformed limb dangle over the edge of the tree as I pressed my face into my dirty knee. I don't know how long I cried, only that once I finished I felt no better than before.

_Well,_ I thought, _at least my death's not for nothing. I'm saving the world. I think. Unless this is some sort of sick joke or weird fantasy, which it very well may be, but hey, I'm not taking any chances._

I sat in that position for a few minutes more, face pressed to my knee as I listened to the birds chirp in the trees and the way the wind made leaves shiver on their branches. I prepared to jump down from my perch. A sound that was not entirely natural, however, drifted out of the woods at my back, and I froze like a startled rabbit at the sound of twigs breaking beneath a foot. Slowly, oh so slowly, I turned my head until I could see behind me out of only one eye, and that's when_ he_ stepped out of the trees, looking for all the world like some storybook forest spirit.

I was not prepared to deal with one of the detectives, not so soon after my bout of crying, and the shock of seeing one _in the flesh_ made me slide as quietly as I could off of the tree. I sat there, crouched in a ball on the far side of the trunk, and I willed him with all my might to go away.

_Did he see me?_ I wondered as my heart thudded in my ears. How could he not hear such a loud sound? My hands, had they not been clutched to tightly around my legs, would have shaken like trees in a storm.

On the other side of the tree I heard footsteps so soft I might have imagined them, followed by another snapping twig. But then I heard a low chuckle followed by a simple Japanese phrase that, for the life of me, I could not recognize, despite my status as a fourth-semester Japanese college student! Still, I knew by the tone that it was an amused—although undeniably firm—command, and that it was most likely directed at me (who else could be around?). I did not move an inch at the sound of his voice and instead concentrated on the earth beneath me, the scent of nearby plants, the sound of birds, and the meager sunlight shining on my shoulders...

I felt the chill of his shadow rather more than I noticed the way he blocked out the sunshine, and I looked up. He stood over me, red hair glowing like burnished garnet in the half-light of the forest. Too many fan fictions describe his eyes as 'emerald,' but they're darker than that. They are the green of forests and deep waters, mature leaves and jealousy. Flawless skin, somewhat feminine features, tall, broad-shouldered...

Kurama. He was undoubtedly Kurama.

It occurred to me, then, just how very naked I was, and before I could stifle it a small scream of shame and shock erupted from my mouth. Kurama jumped backward a step as I clutched my arms around myself in an attempt at modesty, and when he saw what I was trying to do he looked very pointedly above me into and the trees. But his gaze wandered back a moment later, and with a start he gestured at my obviously deformed leg.

I understood the next phrase. He asked me if I was hurt.

I shook my head but could not find the words to tell him I was born this way. This was forever my issue with the Japanese language. Everything made sense on paper. It was when I had to speak that my vocabulary magically disappeared. A form of performance anxiety, I suppose. Freud would have a field day.

Kurama's eyes traveled to the stick at my side, then back to my leg. I saw the pieces click. He studied my very human face for many moments before shooting wary glances at the surrounding trees and shrubs.

_Checking for accomplices, maybe?_ I thought, recalling that I had been sent to the day the Book had been recovered. _Oh, I get it. He's on edge, not taking any chances with the poor, defenseless human who just so handily appeared on the one day that helping someone might prove... fatal. Good old Kurama. Ever the strategist. _

I seemed to pass whatever test he had administered because he then began to remove his jacket. For the first time I noticed how he was dressed: jeans, sneakers, and a button down white shirt beneath a long gray coat. It seemed too modern for him, somehow, but I figured that the anime was probably just a little different from the real situation and decided to let that observation slide. He handed the coat to me while keeping his eyes averted, and I took it from him with shaking hands.

"Can you... turn around?" I said in English, and he looked at me sharply.

"Nani?"

I bit my lip as I struggled to stand up. "You, turn..." I said in Japanese, finally recalling a phrase, and Kurama immediately complied. I shrugged into the jacket and buttoned it up tight, noting how far down it fell on me. Kurama was much taller than I.

"Do you speak Japanese?" he asked in Japanese, and I replied: "Eto choto—a little."

I cleared my throat once I was dressed and Kurama turned back around to face me. Then his eyes narrowed. I couldn't fathom why until he said: "Ningen?"

_He must have read my energy signature._ I hesitated, and his eyes narrowed even further, mere slits of green amid thick lashes.

"Youkai," he stated, simplifying his words for my benefit. "Ningen. Which?"

I shook my head. "I don't know," I said in his language. _Time to peak his interest. Watch me work, Future Jerk! _"Both. Nothing. Everything."

His look of confusion was priceless and I took a mental snapshot of his face, sure I would never see this expression again._ Oh yeah, I am just _so_ devious._

"Nihonjin desu ka?" he asked, inquiring if I was Japanese.

"Iie, Amerikajin desu," I replied, but when he looked mystified I frowned. "Igirisu desu?" No response. "Australia desu? South Africa desu? Scotland desu? Friggin' _Canada _desu?" I named every English speaking country I could think of (and most of the European continent besides) but the reportedly brainy demon just stared at me like I was insane. Even when I said "Eego desu," meaning 'English language,' he just looked at me without understanding.

_What the hell? Do none of those countries exist here? _I thought about it for a moment, applying logic to the situation. _W__ell, in the anime all the demons spoke Japanese, so I guess I have to assume that it's one of the only languages in this world set. Huh. I always thought it was weird that the demons spoke Yusuke's language right off the bat. And even Yomi lives in a Japanese-style house... but still, this is totally not what I was expecting._

Kurama's puzzled frown smoothed over into a look of bland pleasantness. "Come," he said, and I hobbled forward on my makeshift cane. But then he frowned again and stopped me. He pointed at my stick.

"My cane? You want... well, here, but..." I handed it to him as I balanced on my good foot, muttering all the while in English.

"Arigatou," he said as he felt it with his fingers, and then the wood twisted and shook and extended into a longer, more compatible-with-my-body kind of shape. He held it up to me for comparison purposes and made according adjustments. I stared at the cane with an open mouth and took it from him without a word when he finally handed it back to me.

"Kurama desu," he said suddenly, and then he asked for my name. "Onamae wa nan desuka?"

I gaped like a fish. "Danielle desu!" I finally choked out.

His perfect brow furrowed. "Da-ni-e-ru?"

"Da-ni," I amended, and I traced the hiragana characters in the air with a fingertip. "Da-ni."

"Dah-nee," he repeated, putting equal stress on both syllables and softening the vowel sound of the first syllable. The effect was strange, but my Japanese born-and-bred teacher had equal trouble with my name's pronunciation. And since this Kurama had no English background, what more could I expect?

Remembering my manners, I bowed as well as I could from the waist. "Hajimemashite, Kurama san. Dozo yoroshiku. Onegaishimasu."

He returned the bow with an amused smile and parroted the phrases back at me. But then, with a meaningful glance in another direction, he motioned for me to follow him deeper into the forest, and I, not knowing what else I could do, limped along after.

And so it all began.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_And now we have Kurama, everyone's favorite fox demon! You can bet your bananas that they're heading for the temple next, but what will happen there? Will they let her stay? Will they send Dani someplace far away? And who will she meet when she gets there? Stay tuned to find out!_

_I am pleased to report that all chapters have, so far, been above 2,000 words without counting the author's note (and the previous chapter went over the 3,000 marker!). I think that that's a good length, but what do you think? Shorter, longer, just right? Thoughts, please!_

_Also, my update schedule has been pretty quick and unpredictable, but do you think setting up a day to update each week is a good idea? That way the chapters are paced and stuff, which might be nice. I've finished up through chapter six and I am almost done with seven. I'm thinking Sunday or Tuesdays. _

_Many, many, heartfelt thanks to my wonderful reviewers: Dirge of Chaos, crossyourteez, DoilyRox, Kaitou Angel, kitsunkuruoshii, art drawn by vomit, Engraved-Angel, Aicirret, ShadowFireFox13, Cocoasit, and VampireOnFire!_


	5. Chapter 5: If You Only Knew

Future Talk

Chapter 05:

"If Only You Knew"

* * *

_Was it the gingerbread man who let the fox carry him over a river, _I thought as I watched the water rush along below me, _and then got eaten when they were halfway across? Because I might not be made of gingerbread, but we've got the fox thing taken care of already. _Kurama held me in his arms, one arm crooked beneath my knees and the other looped behind my back. I tried not to cling to his neck too much, but that was hard to do when the water reached his knees and threatened to sweep his feet out from under him at every moment. Or was I worrying too much?

_Nope, not worrying too much at all,_ I thought when Kurama stumbled in the stream's quick current. My arms tightened around his neck on reflex, and he made a sound caught halfway between a laugh and a choke. _I'm just too heavy for my own good, and I can't swim._

Earlier, we had come to the stream after twenty minutes of walking, my way made so much easier by Kurama's additions to my cane. I heard the water before I saw it, and with a cry of joy I rushed to the side of the stream and dunked my hands in the shallows. I washed the dirt from my fingers and scrubbed at my face. I made to drink from it, but with sigh I remembered the words of every outdoorsman I had ever heard speak and decided against it. Kurama, however, took a drink from his cupped hands, and when he saw me watching him he gestured for me to do the same. The liquid felt wondrously cool going down my throat, and I sighed from the sheet pleasure of it.

I noticed, then, that Kurama had stripped off his sneakers and rolled up his jeans, and he looked silly and sexy all at once with his open-at-the-collar shirt and long, loose hair.

_Ugh, _I thought, looking away. _Fangirl moment._

The sound of his mellifluous voice drew my attention right back to him, however. "Can you walk through the water?" he asked me, and I understood the Japanese words without undue trouble. I did have undue trouble, however, in answering in the affirmative, because I was not sure I _could_ walk though the water! But I stood up, readied my cane, and took two steps into the stream. Then I slipped, unable to find good traction, and Kurama caught my arm in the blink of an eye to keep me from falling.

"Gomennasai," I said sheepishly, cheeks turning red. But he merely smiled and shoved his shoes and socks into my hands, and then he swept me off my feet... and I mean literally, not in a fangirl-gets-carried-bridal-style-by-a-bishounen sort of way, I promise. I think I may have squeaked like a frightened rabbit as he muttered 'sumimasen,' though. That made him laugh, the sound beginning as a low rumble in his chest that bubbled and spilled over his lips like a wave of water. He forded into the stream, holding me tight to his torso, and I squeezed my eyes shut and tried not to move too much. And that was when the whole gingerbread-man-and-the-fox fable popped into my head.

_Or was it a mouse that the fox carried?_ I thought. _Gah, I can't remember. _

We made it over the stream quickly enough. Once the danger was passed, he set me down atop a smallish boulder at the side of the creek bed. He chose to sit next to me, and without a word (but with a big smile, of course, damn him) he took the shoes out of my hands and put them on again.

"Arigatoo gozaimasu," I said without looking at him. I chose to stare at my grubby toes instead.

He shrugged. "Iie," he said, meaning 'not at all.' He stood up and once again motioned for me to follow.

The next trek was longer by far, and I got the feeling I was slowing Kurama down (huh, understatement of the century, much?). He could have run back to the temple in a matter of minutes I was sure, but despite how grateful I was that he was pacing himself for my benefit I also felt a bit peeved. There was no logical reason for the feeling, but it was undeniably there and was indisputably some sort of annoyance.

_He could carry me, _I thought. _My foot hurts, my shoulder hurts, my everything hurts, and he __just walks along like his shoes are made of cloud. I don't have any shoes. Ouch, was that a rock? __Seriously, we could get there so much faster if... hey, mister, don't you grin at me over your shoulder like that! I can keep up just fine thank you_ very _much!_

That last thought stood in stark contrast to the others, and I felt very much like a hypocrite for thinking it.

"Stupid fanfics calling this guy a gentleman," I grumbled as I stared at the spot between fox's shoulder blades. _He's laughing at me. If only they knew..._

My stream of consciousness dropped off into oblivion when I saw the edge of the forest. The trees thinned out and abruptly stopped, and beyond the line of them began a lawn of neatly clipped grass. My mouth went dry.

_I'm not ready,_ I thought as Kurama and I approached the treeline. The fox motioned for me to hang back while he took a few steps onto the lawn, and with a pointed look over his shoulder he bade make to come after him. I hobbled along and saw before me a vision I had tried many time to imagine but had never quite gotten right: Genkai's temple, all red porches and peaked roofs and Shinto inspired sand gardens. Birdbaths and stone statues and unkempt flower beds lent the temple grounds a wild sort of beauty, and it was only when Kurama hissed a command at me that I realized I had stopped dead in my tracks to stare. The fox demon impatiently grabbed my upper arm and tugged me toward the temple, and with a little more force than was absolutely necessary he tried to pull me up a short set of steps leading to the top of the porch. I stumbled, having long since been a member of a war against stairs, no matter how few, and with a sigh he helped me to sit down on the edge of the porch. My feet dangled over a bed of pale purple flowers, and with weariness born of too much physical activity I slumped, exhausted, in my seat.

"Sit," Kurama commanded, eyes unusually hard as he pressed both hands down onto my shoulders to reinforce said statement. "Stay," he added as an afterthought.

"I'm not a dog," I snapped in Japanese, grumpy from being so tired, and after a moment of shocked silence he laughed. When he moved away he let his hand linger on my shoulder in a small, reassuring squeeze, and the act made me feel a little uncomfortable. _Damn touchy for a demon,_ I thought as he opened one of the Japanese-style sliding doors that led into the house. I heard nothing from inside, and the world around me was quiet save for the sigh of the wind as it passed through the trees.

I liked the temple right off the bat. It was something about the atmosphere of the place—the peacefulness and the way it seemed frozen in an era long since forgotten—that drew me to it. A patch of tall flowering grass near me partially concealed a small statue of a jolly monk with wide cheeks, a round belly, and hands clasped around a rosary in prayer. His bald stone head gleamed in the sun, having seen many years (or so I amused) of weathering. I smiled back at him, ears intent on the sound of anyone approaching, but I heard nothing.

"I think I'll name you Bob," I said in English to the statue, more to amuse myself than anything. "A nice, non-Japanese for you, Mr. Monk. How do you like that?"

His smile was an encouragement, and I stretched my arms high over my head. Satisfied to hear my tendons pop and crackle, I let the arms fall. That was when the door behind me opened with a clatter. I turned my head so fast I nearly gave myself whiplash.

Kurama came out first, of course, and before I could see the source of the pounding feet behind him he had pulled me into his arms and bounded off the porch. My teeth clacked together when we hit the ground, and with one arm pulled tight around my thighs and the other wrapped around my waist he held me off the ground against him, my face pressed into his rich hair. My cane was lost in the fray. I faced away from the house after he rounded the patch of grass hiding the little monk, so I heard (rather than saw the owner of) a low, gravelly voice as it growled what could only be a threat.

"Hey!" I squeaked, pushing away from him so I could see his face. "Put me down!"

He glowered up at me. "Stay still," he hissed, and he put me on the ground at his side. One arm stayed tight around my shoulders, fingers pinching me in a most uncomfortable way, and with a grumble I turned to face Kurama's pursuers.

The growler was Hiei, of course, and the anime had gotten many things about him wrong. First off was his height—they had vastly exaggerated it (or under-exaggerated it; my thoughts were muddled). He wasn't the pitiful 4'10 I expected, but rather a short (although not unheard of ) 5'3 or 5'4. He was still a smidgen taller than me, however, as my frail body had never quite made it past the 5'2 mark (although that was incredibly tall for someone of my physical disability, my doctors were fond of saying). And his_ hair_! Well, the anime had certainly done a good job of mucking _that _up. The white portion at the front looked a lot more natural that it did in the anime, taking the form of pale streaks that did not form a perfect starburst, and when I saw them I almost thought the marks to be signs of aging. And the blue at the tips—oh, there was blue all right, but it was everywhere, not just on the edges of his wild, up-in-all-directions spikes. Every time a strand caught the light it would reflect a brilliant sapphire blue, and the result was a totally inhuman barrage of unnatural color. No one could ever mistake Hiei for a human with hair like that, but what really took the cake were his eyes.

The anime had absolutely nothing on his eyes.

I tried not to stare (but I know I hopelessly failed) at those incredibly large eyes that reflected a red so intense that I might as well have shoved a maraschino cherry into my socket if I were inclined to mimic that incredible color. Long lashes made those huge eyes seem even wider, but they were currently screwed up tight with rage, and I recoiled unconsciously into Kurama's side. Hiei looked like a wild boy, a veritable Peter Pan with his well-worn cloak, scuffed boots, and tanned skin When he opened his mouth to speak I caught the glint of delicate and pointed eyeteeth, and the result of combing all of his inhuman features together was an absolutely feral portrait of a man at one with his animalistic tendencies.

"Shit," I muttered as Hiei barked something at Kurama. "Holy _crap_."

Three other people burst out of the house at that point, and I recognized them all. Genkai was there, of course, and she was not what I had expected. Small, stoop-shouldered, with beady eyes of an undistinguished color, her hair was more gray than pink until the light caught it and bubblegum burst forth in a sparkle of incredible pigmentation. I had been expecting a bit more craziness out of her, but she just looked like an old woman with a strange dye-job. She looked... well, human, and I wasn't sure if this disappointed or relieved me.

And then there was Kuwabara. Oh, Kuwabara. Carrot-colored hair that overshadowed narrow brown eyes and a long face, a strong jaw, arms that looked like they had seen many, many hours at the gym... he looked absurdly human standing next to the otherworldly Hiei and the pretty-as-a-picture Kurama. I didn't find him ugly, not necessarily, but I could see why the anime portrayed him as such. He was just so _plain_ next to the others, and for a minute I felt a little sorry for the big guy. In the same moment I liked him, empathized with him, understood his reason for acting overly cocky and confrontational around his teammates. I had been feeling pretty insecure next to Kurama, myself.

_Being close to a guy who's prettier than you does a number on your self esteem, _I reasoned sourly as I looked at the last member of our party.

Yukina.

If I had had any reason to wonder why Hiei was being so territorial, her presence was the thing that made it all make sense.

Earlier I mentioned how Hiei's eyes are commonly (and mistakenly) referred to as 'ruby' in color. The gemstone metaphor, however, suits Yukina like a tailored glove. Her eyes have a velvety sheen, like fresh rose petals, and their dark red color is a far cry from Hiei's maraschino screamers. I had always wondered how the hell the anime version of Yukina was stupid enough not to recognize Hiei as her brother, given the similarity of their eyes and all, but seeing them in person put a whole new spin on things. They both had red eyes, yes, but that's like saying that I'm related to Audrey Hepburn because we're both brunettes, and that's so far from the truth it's laughable.

And her hair, too—oh, wow. For a moment I thought it was a wig. No one can have hair the color of wintergreen chewing gum, right? But the strands were lustrous and full and shiny, like silk spun by spiders, and it suited her pale, snowy (ha!) skin so well...

I that's when I realized, as I was staring at the unknowing objects of many adoring fans, that everyone was looking right at me.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Well, I didn't exactly want to leave off there, but that's 2,500 words and it's dragging on a bit. Still, I hope you're enjoying the way the characters interact with one another. Pretty soon we'll see why everyone's making such a fuss over lil' ol' Dani. It should be entertaining, so stay tuned!_

_Also, thanks for the feedback on having an update schedule. I have decided to update Tuesdays as per the lone request of one Engraved-Angel. Today is the last non-Tuesday that will see an update, so mark your calenders for next week. =)_

_Great big thanks to my reviewers: Cocoasit, Delu, lectaelf, cranberryben, ShadowFireFox13, VampireOnFire, Engraved-Angel, Aicirret, Dirge Of Chaos, crossyourteez, and colbub! You are all rockstars!_


	6. Chapter 6: Energy

Future Talk

Chapter 06:

"Energy"

* * *

"Stupid woman," Hiei snapped. "Quit staring. Where did you come from, stupid woman?"

_How many times have I heard that one in fanfics?_ I thought sourly, pleased to note that I was having less trouble understanding all the Japanese flying around. Why hello, benefits of total immersion! _Baka onna this, baka onna that, at least the fangirls got that one right._

"Yes, where did you come from?" Genkai asked, stepping forward. With great care she put herself between Hiei and me, and when the fire demon made to go around her she held out a restraining hand. He growled like a caged tiger and glared at me like he was willing my skin to light on fire, which he probably was considering his pyromaniacal tendencies.

I looked up at Kurama because he seemed like the only one on my side at this point, and he smiled. My appreciation of this fact dimmed a few watts, however, when the perfection of his smile reminded me of just how much prettier than me he most assuredly was.

_Get it together, Dani, _I instructed myself. _This is social politics and survival, not a beauty pageant!_

"Go on, tell them," he said.

A deep breath drew fresh air into my nervous lungs. "I'm from America," I told them all, and in return I was given four blank stares. "My Japanese is not so good. I speak English better. Do any of you speak English?"

"I've never even heard of English," Genkai muttered, tossing her gray-pink hair contemptuously. Despite the fact that she was smaller than even me (Genkai was stooped from age, I supposed) the psychic still managed to look down her nose in my general direction—OK, right at me—and yet I found myself liking her probably more than I should have at that point. I'd always gotten along with cantankerous old people. Call it one of my numerous personality quirks and the result of volunteering in an old folks home during high school.

"American, huh? That's probably some little island in the middle of nowhere," Kuwabara chimed in. He had a rough voice, but he sounded a lot less idiotic than he did in the anime. "And English—that's probably like an obscure Chinese dialect or something."

The above, by the way, is an approximation of what he said. I didn't catch every last word, but I understood more than enough to comprehend his meaning. Educated approximations such as the aforementioned one are made throughout this text.

"_They_ might have sent her," Hiei growled (I had no need to ask who 'they' were, but I played dumb with every last ounce of acting ability I possessed). "We should kill her now before she can turn on us."

I gasped and shrank into Kurama's side, and his arm tightened around my shoulders like a vice. "We can't just kill her," Kurama said in a soothing voice (one which reminded me of my kindergarten teacher, whom I had hated with the unmatched passions of a troublemaking five-year-old).

Hiei seemed just as peeved by that voice as I was. "Why not?"

"Because she might just be a lost human," Kurama said in a faltering voice, and Genkai snorted.

"She's a demon. I can smell it on her," said the psychic. "A weak one, though, and..." Her eyes went wide enough to show off their color: rheumy brown surrounded by yellowed white. "Kuwabara," she said.

"On it." He squinted at me, putting one hand on his chin in the classic Kuwabara-is-think-think-thinking pose. "Whoa, weird!" he said after a few moments, and he threw his hands in the air like a scientist who just discovered new taxonomic nomenclature. _Egad, Brain!_ I wanted to say, but I didn't. "Human soul, alright, but _demon _energy!"

"You see?" Hiei said with a triumphant leer. "She's obviously a spy for that damned medium who gave us so much trouble yesterday! He probably channeled a human spirit into a demon's dead body and planted it out in the forest just to get us to let our guard down!"

I suppressed a smile at the irony of just how close to truth Hiei actually was. _If only you knew. No mediums though, Hiei,_ I thought. _Just a future version of the king of all creation; that's all. _

"We can't be sure of that, Hiei," said Kurama.

"But we also can't be sure she's _not_ a spy," said Genkai. She crossed her arms and studied me, and I felt like a bug under the power of her gaze. I did my best to stare back and look appropriately innocent.

"The psychic agrees," said Hiei (_No, she didn't!_ I thought, eyes flickering toward him). "We kill her."

And then my thoughts scattered to the winds because a sword that gleamed like ice in the sunshine caught my attention, and Hiei was leaping at me.

Kurama pushed me aside and I landed in heap on the hard ground; Kurama caught the flat of Hiei's blade between his palms and pushed the fire apparition back, but Hiei retaliated like a striking snake. Genkai, Kuwabara, and Yukina all rushed forward to put a stop to the fray, ignoring me for a few moments in favor of separating their warring compatriots. But I didn't just lie there and let the fox demon protect me from his bloodthirsty friend the way most stupid Yu Yu Hakusho OCs would: I took matters into my own hands and ran for it. Well, hobbled, at any rate. My cane was on the porch, and I did not want to go through Hiei to get to it (no death wish for me, thanks!), so I hopped on one foot over the grass and around the statues until I passed the corner of the temple. I had no idea if they noticed my flight or not, so as I leaned against the edge of the temple's porch in order to take a quick breather I couldn't help but keep a wary eye on my surroundings. The sounds of fighting still came from where I left them, so I assumed I was alone...

Not for long, though. A shout went up from behind me, and then I felt cold steel pressed against my jaw.

"Don't move," Hiei hissed from his perch atop the porch. In a blink he was in front of me, sword ready at my throat, unthinkable eyes boring into my brain like the bits of a malicious drill.

Kurama, tailed closely by the others, bolted around the corner at that point, so when Hiei's eyes flickered to the fox demon I made to take advantage of the distraction and move around him. But I had only one good foot and he had two, so when I summoned up a hop so mighty it would have made the king of bunnies envious, he just stuck out one leg and tripped me. 'Ouch' didn't really cover it; I hit the ground _hard_. He put his foot on my chest a moment later and pressed the tip of his sword into my collarbone, drawing a thin line of salty-sweet blood. I hissed in pain and he laughed. _You sadist!_ I thought, and I ground my teeth together so I would not cry out. _I'm not giving you the satisfaction of seeing me cry, buddy, so wipe that damn grin off your ugly face, why don't ya? _

Kurama made a harsh sound of protest at the sight of my blood and spoke to Hiei in rapid Japanese I was at a loss to understand (threat of death and disfigurement will do that to you), and then Hiei's otherwise gleeful face darkened like a storm cloud. He stepped away from me, knelt, and grabbed my left ankle in his hands and jerked me toward him. I screamed a little, clutching at the hem of the coat I wore so it would not ride up and expose me to everyone who happened to walk by, and then I realized how intently he was examining my deformed foot. His fingers played lightly over the dirty limb, brushing curled toes and my club-like heel with something that I could have mistaken for tenderness had I not known him any better. My cheeks colored on reflex, so I looked away and tried not to giggle when his fingers tickled under my foot's arch.

"I don't think she's a spy," Kurama said once Hiei had calmed down. "No one would send such a defenseless spy among people like us."

I looked to see how Hiei would take that little piece of rhetoric, and his eyes lifted to my face. His eyes creeped me out but I stared right back at him, defiant. He did not let go of my ankle. "You were born with this," he said slowly.

"Yes," I said. "So let me go."

His fingers only tightened on my ankle, and_ that_ hurt, my weak bones posing no match for his strength. I cried out in pain, then, and he dropped my foot as if it had stung him. But that made my heel collide with the ground and I cried out even louder, curling in on myself so I could clutch at the offended joint. Pain. Oh, I knew pain very well, but that never made it any less of an enemy.

Yukina, surprisingly, shouldered her way forward at that point, and Hiei cleared out of there as if she were a venomous snake (_Ha_, I thought). "It hurts," she said, letting me hear her soft, sweet voice for the first time. It was like wind passing through a field of icicles, delicate and frail. "I'm so sorry. Can I help?"

I was about to nod, but then I remembered that I wasn't supposed to know that she could heal. The nod turned into a rather forced sob as she took my leg into her small, cool hands and closed her eyes. Light the color of a glacier poured from her fingers and coated my skin, bringing blessed numbness in its wake.

"Thank you," I said when she pulled away, trying my best to look amazed at her powers (and considering how incredible they looked in real life, I didn't have to act too hard). But her rose-petal eyes held infinite sadness, and for a moment I was afraid she was going to cry. _Hiei will kill me if I make her cry! _I thought and I rushed to amend things.

"Hey, don't do that," I said sheepishly, reaching for her hand. Hers was a tad bit larger than mine, oddly enough—I had always thought she'd be smaller than me, but she was closer to Hiei in height than I was.

"I'm sorry," she said, shaking her head. "I can't heal you. I can only ease your pain. This injury is beyond me."

"I know," I said, searching for the words. "No one can fix this. This is just the way I am. So don't worry, please."

"I'm still not convinced," Hiei said suddenly. I looked up at him, fighting back a protest. Just what did I have to do to get this guy to lay off—submit to a full cavity search? A polygraph test? _Fingerprinting_? He had moved to stand on the porch and his sword was sheathed at his side. Still, I couldn't help but stare at the blade's scabbard as Yukina lifted her hands to my torn collarbone and mended my broken skin with another dose of her glacial powers. The skin, when she lowered her hands and the light faded, was reddened, but there was no sign of the cut or a scar.

Genkai, on the ground, nodded up at him. "We need to investigate this further," she said. Her steely eyes moved to regard me, and for a second I thought she could see straight through my ill-conceived act and into the horrible truth beneath. I held my breath until she spoke. "I'm sorry, but you'll have to come with us inside."

Kurama proffered my cane an instant later, pulling the object out of what looked to me like thin air (which, considering how well he hid that rose whip, it might have been). "Can you stand?" he asked, and I took the cane from him with a nod but without a word. Yukina tried to help me, but I warned her off with a barbed look and managed to maneuver until I was upright and standing on my own two legs. It seemed, to me, that everyone stared at my wobbling ankles and trembling knees with held breath, and that they expelled that breath only after I stayed standing for longer than single moment.

Genkai turned toward the house and threw open the nearest sliding door. The inside appeared to be made up entirely of shadows. "In here," she said, and with a look at Kuwabara she added: "Well, don't just stand there like an idiot—help her!"

"I don't need help, thank you," I said on reflex, but I could tell by their expressions that Genkai, Kurama, Kuwabara, and Yukina all thought I was more than in need of some assistance—Hiei, conversely, just looked bored and on edge all at once. But without so much as a glance at Kurama—who was hovering over me like a distressed mother hen—I headed for the porch stairs and tried my very best to climb all five of them. However, I was so tired from all the walking and hopping and screaming and stress that I collapsed on the third stair, falling to my knees in a boneless, graceless heap.

"Um, are you sure you don't want me to carry you?" Kuwabara asked, hands flapping uselessly in front of him.

I shot him the most withering look I could muster, but it passed straight over his head like a misguided missile.

"She's sure," Hiei said, coming to stand behind the taller human. His unearthly eyes glared down at me, and they were so alien that their expression seemed nigh incomprehensible. "Stupid woman."

My mouth twitched, but my retort became swallowed by a screech of protest when Hiei grabbed my wrists in his hands and pulled bodily me up the last steps. I sprawled across the porch like a limp rag doll, and then he had me thrown over his shoulder like a sack of foul-mouthed grain. I dropped the cane and it hit the porch with a hollow clicking sound. His shoulder dug so hard into my stomach that I lost my breath, and that's when he took off at a run down the hallway, shouts of "Hiei, wait!" ringing after us in the dark.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Meh heh heh. I think I know what I enjoy about this fic the most: all the crass fan fiction references I can make! So does that make this fic a satire since I'm making a mockery of some fic types? Maybe. I have no idea. But I still like it. Also (can't believe no one picked up on it) the chapter titles have all been names of songs, none of which I own!_

_Thanks so much to my old and new reviewers: xSugarcoatedxStarlightx, Dirge of Chaos, ShadowFireFox13, crossyourteez, DoilyRox, Redgummies, and Engraved-Angel! You are all little bits of sunshine in this author's otherwise dark existence (and I mean that literally; I live in the basement of a college dorm, hardy har har). _

_Special thanks to AnthyRose for leaving me a very informative comment and a bridge into great conversation and Tomoshibi-chan for helpful the Japanese tips!_


	7. Chapter 7: Happens All The Time

Future Talk

Chapter 07:

"Happens All the Time"

* * *

I am a small person. This smallness is a product of my genetics, a tough pregnancy, and a much-too-early birth. People pick me up all the time because I'm tiny and weak and pale and light enough to throw into any pair of willing arms, and I thought, before everything happened, that I was used to being tossed around like a rag doll. I mean, it happens to me all the time. All. The. Time. 'Can I carry you up the stairs, Dani?' 'Do you need help, Dani?' 'That looks heavy, Dani, let me get it for you, Dani!' It's handy when I actually need help, well-meant-but-annoying when I don't, and downright infuriating when people won't take the hint and leave me a-freaking-lone. Still, I'm used to it and I can play off my irritation with a grateful smile and plenty of well-practiced thank yous.

But still: why me all the_ freaking_ time?

I hated Hiei in that moment, hated him so much I could have screamed. But, as things were, all I could do was hold onto the back of his cloak and pray that the shoulder digging into my solar plexus wouldn't leave me bruised and contused like an apple that had been used in a game of major league baseball. Hallways rushed past us and we overtook Genkai before I could catch my breath well enough to scream: "Put me down right NOW, dammit!"

However, the phrase came out in English so the only response I received was a particularly painful bounce in Hiei's strep. Genkai just snorted when Hiei fell into step beside her, and with a wave of her hand she told him to put me down.

He did, and none to gently I might add. But to his credit he kept a firm grip on my upper left arm, holding me so I could lean on him (or, rather, so he could hold me up by the single palm's-breadth of contact we shared) for support when it came time for me to step with my left foot. Luckily, though, we did not have to walk more than a few steps, because Genkai soon fished a key from some hidden pocket in her robes and opened a locked room with a western style door.

"Please stay in here," Genkai said, face utterly impassive as she watched Hiei escort me inside. The only emotion she betrayed came when Hiei abruptly let go of my arm mid-step, sending me careening to the ground with a pained cry. I caught only the briefest glimpse of her wince as I fell; my hair tumbled about my face as I lay, exhausted, on the hard wood floor. Footsteps—presumably Hiei's—moved away from me. The door shut a moment later and the lock clicked back into place like the tolling of a funeral bell.

I did not stray from my spot on the floor for a long time. The wood felt cold beneath my palms and bare legs, and I enjoyed the sensation because it counteracted the flaming ache in my left foot. But then my body started to hurt from the awkwardness of my fallen stance, and so I sat up cross-legged in order to get a better look around.

Not that there was much to see, mind you. A tiny, cell-like room with no windows, an empty bookcase, and two doors constituted my prison, and with a grunt I stood up and hopped to the door Hiei had not taken the time to shove me through. I hoped, vaguely, for an exit, but when the door turned out to belong to a small junk closet I didn't feel all that disappointed. I hadn't been hoping very hard, you see, so it was only with a mild sort of sigh that I propped myself against the wall facing the door.

_Staring contest time,_ I thought. _I'll sit here until they come back for me. That'll show 'em._ I thought about it for another second and did a mental facepalm. _Crap. What am I supposed to be showing them, exactly?_

My tailbone started to ache from sitting in one position for too long, so with yet another weary sigh I got on all fours and crawled to the door. "Is anyone out there?" I called in Japanese as I rapped my knuckles against the wood, and when I did not get an answer I assumed that I was alone. Either that, of course, or I had a guard who had no intention of speaking to me, and since that made me mad, sad, and lonely all at once I decided that I was simply alone. I crawled back to my spot against the wall and pulled my knees to my chest.

I had no way to tell time without a clock or the sun (the only light I had came from a bare bulb hanging from the ceiling), but I assume I sat there for at least an hour—replaying events in my head and practicing Japanese to the empty room—before boredom overtook me and made practicing Japanese feel, well, banal. I laid down on the floor and rolled around for a bit, singing songs from various musicals as I stared at the wood on the ceiling. _Spamalot_'s "Always Look On the Bright Side of Life," whistling portions and all, made the quiet of my cell almost bearable, but soon even that grew wearisome when I had no one to play Patsy's part and make a fun harmony with me.

"I miss home," I said when I stopped singing, remembering the way my fellow music majors would always lend a voice or three to whoever asked. Had I busted out that song in the cafeteria I would have wound up with a ten-part _a capella _choir and six guitarists in less than a minute._ Dear God, I need something to do,_ I thought, and then I remembered the closet. I smiled like Christmas had come early. _Bingo!_

I crawled to it and opened the door to the sight of a wooden rocking horse with a broken-off tail and a green vase as tall as my thigh with a giant crack down one side waging a valiant battle against clutter. These two objects seemed to be holding back an avalanche of other junk, and with a grin I stood up and yanked at both of these pieces as hard as I could. I landed on my butt (of course) when they both came free, and with a yelp I skittered backward as the rest of the stuff came cascading out onto the floor. Vases, scrolls, old books, three faded seat cushions, a small stuffed reindeer, a wooden box, papers, a streamer of those men-holding-hands cutouts that I used to make as a kid, a lonely boot, a flower pot, a wind-up toy shaped like a green robot, a metal sculpture of a pony... and that was just the tip of the proverbial iceberg (although this iceberg was more than a little dusty). I began to poke and paw through the kitsch, extracting the seat cushions for my own personal use, and that's when I saw the cane.

_Score. _

The wood was scuffed and chipped, but the red-painted staff with an engraved grip fit my height and looked sturdy enough to hold me. I took a few laps around the room with it, giggling at my find, and then I noticed another object that could prove useful.

A drum. A small goblet drum made of whitewashed leather and pale wood.

Now _there_ was something I could put to good use.

I took the drum and settled against the wall, cushions tucked beneath and behind me as I held the drum tight between my knees. I start with a simple beat using first the side of my hand and then my entire palm: chik-chika-CHONK-CHONK! The beat progressed like a wild thing, raging out of control the moment I let it free. I went slow and then fast, and then I double timed everything and half-timed it again. I tried beatboxing along with the rhythm for a little while, but I was never much of a beatboxer and soon gave that little diversion up. My adrenaline pumped the way it always did when I made music, and the sound of two hands smacking against leather had never sounded so sweet.

To me, the voice of the drum sounded a lot like _Bye bye, boredom!_

I love drumming. I was good at it, too, having been in drum line in high school and the member of a drumming class in college. The rhythm, the feel of the instrument beneath my hands, the sound as it pulses against my eardrums... oh, wow, I love drumming. I don't love it it as much as some other instruments, mind you, but drums are ambrosial despite being such simple things. They're the first instrument created by humans, the first thing to provide a creative balance to life aside from the beauty of a human voice...

I started singing not much later, mapping out a string of little wordless notes to the beat of my hands on the drum. My hands led me somewhere my mind couldn't yet see, but pretty soon the song I had been edging towards came out in full force, and the odd appropriateness of it made me grin.

_What's wrong with the world, mama?_

"Where Is the Love?" sounded half like a prayer and half life a vicious demand when I sang it. Maybe my mood was too dark for the song thanks to being locked up in a tiny, dim room with nothing but a rocking horse and a stuffed reindeer for company, but I still had fun with the song. I didn't have the best voice, of course (being a music major doesn't make me a fantastic singer), but I felt more than a little pleased with myself as I angrily spat the lyrics that the original singers tended to coat with happiness and sunshine. After all, those lyrics were cynical, speaking of war and hate and starvation...

I let myself get lost, for a time. Two revolutions of the song passed before the door to the room burst open and I saw Kuwabara staring at me like I was some sort of freak of nature. My voice faltered, cracked, and dropped off into oblivion as we stared at one another, and then he plopped down onto the floor and leaned toward me.

"Go on," he said, eyes narrowed.

I hesitated.

"Come on, play," he said, miming out beating on a drum when I didn't start. He saw the reindeer lying next to my feet and picked it up with his gigantic, calloused hands. "Please?" he asked as he tucked the toy into the crook of his elbow. He looked so much like and overgrown child at that point that I could not muster up the courage to say no, so I started a rather bare rendition of Michael Jackson's 'Billy Jean.' When I finished, Kuwabara smiled and said: "Mou ichidou! One more time!"

I went through a whole playlist of songs: Top 40 hits and obscure indie folk pieces, rap tracks and country blues, R&B crooners and hard rock ballads, all tweaked to fit into my vocal range as well as the range of the small drum. Kuwabara got pretty excited during a few of them, swaying around and egging me on when things got intense. But my small voice got rough after a while, and when I finally ended Matt and Kim's "Good Old Fashioned Nightmare" with a croak he let me have some peace.

"I've never heard any of those songs before," he said, eyes bright and eager as he slowly enunciated his words for my benefit. He seemed like such a loveable goofball that I couldn't help but smile back at him, and I felt myself opening up to his cheerful personality and personable expression. "Did you write all those yourself?"

I shook my head.

"Oh. Well, you have good music in A-me-ri-ka, even if I can't get the words."

I laughed at the labored pronunciation of my country's name. "Thank you. I love music."

"Well, hey, you're good at it," he said. "You know, I think you're OK."

I stared at him.

"The others are saying you're a spy, but I think you're OK." He grinned. "I'll stick up for you if they ever decide to switch guard duty and let me back into the meeting."

"Meeting?"

"To decide what to do with you." He leaned in close. "All Kurama could tell us was your name. Dah-nee, right?"

"Dani," I said, stressing the flat 'a' on the first syllable as much as I could. "Da-a-a-a-nee."

"Dah-ah-ah-ah-nee?"

This went on for quite some time, but he had trouble getting it. I gave up eventually, resigning myself to a life as 'Dah-nee' (or, more accurately, Donny) for however long I was going to be in this world... which was shaping up to be a long time.

"Well, as long as we're on the subject of names, I'm Kuwabara," Kuwabara said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Like I said before, I think you're OK. But the others aren't so sure, especially Hiei." Just before I frowned I remembered that I had not yet been told Hiei's name, so I tried to look confused. "Oh, you know, the guy with the red eyes and spiky hair," Kuwabara clarified. My resulting grimace must have spoken volumes because Kuwabara reached out to pat my hand in sympathy. "Don't worry about him, though: that shorty's got a permanent case of stick-up-the-ass."

I laughed, unable to help it. "I may have picked up on that," I told him, and I made a slicing motion across my neck. "Sword."

"He's like that with everybody at first. You'll get used to it."

"I'll get used to death threats?"

It was Kuwabara's turn to giggle. "Well, you'll get used to that shorty, at any rate." Then his look turned serious. "But you gotta tell me where you came from, Dani. You showed up on a bad day."

_Fishing time,_ I thought. "Bad day?"

My new friend reached up to rub the back of his head. "I can't tell you much," he said to the ceiling. _Damn,_ I thought. "But we're all on edge, and you're..." He hesitated.

"I'm what?"

"Well, you're an odd coincidence. Today's the one day you shouldn't be here, and yet here you are." He shook his head, searching for simple words to explain things that were anything but simple. "We've been patrolling the forest day and night since yesterday, and you didn't show up until Kurama found you sitting on a log. No one can figure out how you got here." Another pause, and then: "Unless you want to tell me, of course. If you got here on accident, I could vouch for you."

That made me stop to think, and then I berated myself for not coming up with a plausible story before people started asking questions. Just how much should I reveal to the detectives?

_Kif, we have a conundrum._

By my reckoning, I had two options. The first was to make up some bullshit story about my innocence that seemed plausible enough to appease the detectives. But there were many, many drawbacks to that plan. I could mix up the details if I wasn't careful, which could poke holes in my story that might prove irreparable. Or I could make up a story that got me sent away from the temple—if I pretended to have family or a life in this world I could be sent away to find them or something, right? And what if the family I made up was actually _real_ and I happened to fit into the role of their long-lost-college-roommate's-step-niece or something equally ridiculous?

No, that option was definitely out. The second option presented itself: faking amnesia. I could probably do that with some success, but... oh, god, Hiei. He could read my mind, making both amnesia and a story impossible. Koenma had, after all, only placed blocks on memories of our meeting and Yu Yu Hakusho itself...

_Dammit, Koenma,_ I thought. _Way to ruin all my plans through freaking OMISSION._

"You OK?" Kuwabara asked when I said nothing, and I nodded at him.

"I'm not sure how I got here," I tentatively began, and then a third, hidden option—an option so devious and unexpected, an option so incredibly _simple_ that it would have put the devil himself to shame—suddenly popped into my head.

In that moment, I knew exactly what I was going to do.

I was going to tell the truth.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Oh, cliffy!_

_All songs belong to their writers/performers, not to me! "Where Is the Love" belongs to the Black Eyed Peas and "Good Old Fashioned Nightmare" belongs to Matt & Kim; "Billy Jean" belongs to the incomparable Michael Jackson._

_The phrase "Kif, we have a conundrum" is from a Futurama episode, and I hold no claim to it, either._

_I love Kuwabara. Yu Yu Hakusho would not be the same without that loveable goon. I'm going to do my best to portray him well, so please accept Kazuma Kuwabara for the awesome character than he truly is._

_Many thanks to my reviewers: Tomoshibi-chan, c00ki3b4ndit, Dirge of Chaos, xSugarcoatedxStarlightx, ShadowFireFox13, VampireOnFire, rain chant, DoilyRox, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, colbub, crossyourteez, and heve-chan!_


	8. Chapter 8: All Over You

Future Talk

Chapter 08:

"All Over You"

* * *

I took a deep breath and looked at Kuwabara. "I am going to sound stupid," I said, "but I honestly have no idea how I got here." And that was almost the truth because I had no idea what the physics of a dimensional jump were. "I was walking home from the library and..."

So I told him the story of my death: walking home, hearing screams, getting stabbed, waking up in the forest. I didn't tell a single lie, choosing only to omit the experiences that took place in the future.

_Thanks, Koenma,_ I thought, _for giving me that idea. 'Freaking omission' indeed!_

"I wandered for a bit, and that's when I met Kurama," I said, finishing my story. Kuwabara stroked his chin for a moment, looking up at the ceiling as if it could tell him how to react to such an off-the-wall tale.

"I don't know what to make of that," he said at last, "but it sounds like you're telling me the truth."

"That's because I am," I said, and I could say that part with a 95% clean conscience.

"Still, I feel like you're leaving something out. Something important."

_Uh-oh. Bulls eye, much? _

He started to study me, leaning in close as if he could sniff out whatever I was hiding. I tried not to sweat or look guilty or gulp like an over exaggerated cartoon character (pun totally intended!). "I don't feel any malice in you at all, but you haven't been able to explain that demonic aura of yours, either," he said.

I had no idea how to counter that.

"And Kurama said that you didn't freak out when he made your cane grow longer," he said. "And you looked awed more than anything when Yukina healed your neck. Most humans would be scared after seeing stuff like that."

An opening appeared and I took it. "I woke up naked in a forest after being stabbed to death," I said, running my fingers through my hair. "You think a little magic mumbo jumbo is supposed to_ scare_ me? At this point my dead grandmother could walk into the room and I wouldn't bat an eye."

That made him ponder the ceiling again. "I guess you have a point," he said at last, hands dropping to rest on his knees. "And you did stare at Hiei like he was an alien when he first came out, so it doesn't seem like you're used to the way demons look or anything..."

I jumped at yet another opening Kuwabara so ignorantly handed me: the opening of ignorance. "You keep using that word."

"What word?"

"Demon."

He scratched the back of his neck. "You don't know what it means?"

"Of course I do—religious badguys and junk, ogres from bedtime stories, goblins under bridges. I just don't know why you keep saying it."

"Oh, um..." He sighed. "Look, I've never had to explain this to anyone before, so don't interrupt me until I'm done or I might forget something, alright?"

He proceeded to describe the symbiotic nature of the three worlds, giving me a brief outline of Koenma's role in it all (but without mentioning his name) and how demons had been regularly coming over to the Human World so long as they filed the proper paperwork beforehand. He sketched a brief portrait of his and Yusuke's roles as spirit detectives alongside Hiei and Kurama, reformed demons, and assured me that demons weren't all like the scary beasts pictured in fairytales.

"Yukina was nice," I said when he signaled he was finished. He gave me a very funny look and I realized my mistake. _Oops._ I tried to cover my tracks with: "Oh, she's a demon, right? That hair and those eyes..."

Kuwabara preened, as I figured he would when I complimented his love and smoothed over a potential train wreck. "Yukina is the sweetest, most wonderful girl in the entire world," he gushed, cheeks flushing red. He squeezed the stuffed reindeer doll in his arms and grinned like a lunatic, and I laughed at the incongruous picture he presented. But his face soon darkened, and we sat in a contemplative silence for a moment that stretched into several minutes.

"So... what happens now?" I asked when the silence finally became too much to bear.

Kuwabara didn't look at me. "I gotta tell the others what you told me."

"You don't believe me, do you?" His eyebrows knit together at the baldness of my question, and I clapped a hand over my mouth. I hadn't meant to say it. "Sorry," I said, studying the way my fingers looked when they wrapped around the cane so I wouldn't have to meet Kuwabara's eyes. "The story sounds strange even to me, so I thought..."

He got to his feet. "Yeah, it does sound pretty strange," he said, though not unkindly. "Try not to worry about it, though, Dani. Weird stuff happens to us every day. If anyone can figure this out, it's us."

I looked up at him and tried to smile like a lost child (it was easier than expected). "Thank you," I said, and he smiled back before walking out the door.

He popped back in a few seconds later, however, to toss me the stuffed reindeer with a blush.

* * *

Kuwabara returned to fetch me after what I guessed to be a twenty minute period of maddening quiet. I sat with my ear to the door listening for nonexistent voices until I heard footsteps coming toward my room; then I scooted backward and sat down in my earlier position so it didn't look as if I had been trying to eavesdrop (which, of course, I had).

"Come with me," Kuwabara said as he unlocked and opened the door, and I got to my feet with the help of the hand he offered. He walked slowly so I could keep up, and we navigated a maze of identical wooden hallways until we came upon a set of tall sliding doors.

"If they ask questions," he said, "just tell them what you told me and you should be fine."

I tried not to look panicked as he slid the door aside.

"Come on," he said when I didn't move forward. "No one's gonna bite you."

I shot him a dark look. "Even Hiei?"

"Well, maybe Hiei. But still, go in."

The chamber possessed a high ceiling and a stone fireplace that could have housed a car had anyone been inclined to try and fit one inside it. It was too warm for a fire at the moment, but nevertheless a small pile of logs blazed like a miniature sun and cast a flickering glow about the room, deepening the shadows in a way that made everyone's face appear sunken and haggard. Yukina stood near the fireplace and spoke in a low voice with Kurama; Hiei leaned against a wall opposite the fire and brooded into the scarf around his neck (his eyes were closed, a fact for which I was grateful). Genkai sat at a low table in front of the fire, sipping tea and studying the way the steam whirled out of the cup and into the muggy air. Yukina, as I entered the room, caught my eye and smiled as she moved to sit across the table from Genkai, hands on her knees as she knelt on the tatami mats that covered the floor. But my eyes, of course, were drawn to the newcomers lounging on the wooden floor in front of me.

"Is this her?" Yusuke asked, cocking an eyebrow up at me. His wide brown eyes lingered on my exposed foot. "Not much of a spy if you ask me."

"Yusuke, be polite," Botan said in a hushed voice. The grim reaper I was used to seeing act like a giddy schoolgirl seemed subdued and wary, probably of me.

"Hello," I managed. "My name is Dani. It is nice to make your acquaintance."

Yusuke scoffed and I took the opportunity to study him. He looked a lot more Asian than the rest of his friends with his black hair, olive skin, and bright brown eyes, but those eyes still set him apart as something _other_, something uncommon and unexpected given the way they jumped and gleamed in a way that wasn't totally to blame on the firelight. I could see, as I looked at him, why many demons feared this young man. He looked like intensity made solid, like his spirit was about to jump out of his skin or twitch like a wild thing behind his eyes. Even when he lay sprawled out on the ground like stunned ox, as he was doing then, I could see that he was ready for anything the world cared to heave at him.

Botan, similarly, didn't seem human at all despite the pleasing symmetry of her features and the proportional shape of her limbs. Her hair was blue, of course, but the powdery color didn't have the streaky sheen of a bad dye job or even the roots-of-a-different-shade sort of look common to people with unusual hair dye preferences. She reminded me of Yukina with her incredibly pale skin and impossible hair, and those eyes... the anime had truly dumbed down the pink part. Those eyes looked as fluffily bubblegum-ish as her hair. Everything about her, in fact, looked like bubblegum and cotton candy in my oh-so-ordinary eyes.

Genkai gestured at a cushion next to Yukina. "Sit," she said to me, and I moved toward the low table and flopped down onto the thin pillow with a grateful sigh. "Kuwabara told us your story," the psychic said, and although I kept my eyes locked on her I could feel the others in the room begin to meander in the direction of the table. The low buzz of chitchat had vanished into sullen stillness. "I'm still not convinced, though, so we'll be checking out whether or not you're telling the truth directly."

"How?" I asked, but I had a hunch that Hiei had something to do with it and Genkai quickly confirmed my suspicions.

"Kuwabara already told you about demons," said Genkai as she passed a withered hand through her gray-pink hair. "Hiei is a demon who possesses the power of telepathy, among other things."

I turned around to look at the aforementioned apparition, hoping that my apparent uneasiness would give weight to the I-am-new-to-the-whole-demon-thing-so-have-mercy scenario. He cracked open an eye a second later, revealing the red I thought I was prepared for but I knew, in that moment, I would never grow accustomed to. I looked away, heart going nuts with apprehension.

"So he'll read my mind?" I mumbled, staring at the tabletop and Genkai's gnarled hands. Despite having predicted this turn of events, I was more than a little worried about their result.

"Yes."

I felt my stomach churn as nausea made the room grow blurry.

"I'd ask you if you were opposed to this, but you honestly don't have much say in the matter. Just stay still and it should be over in a few minutes. Resist mentally and he'll force his way inside, and you don't want that." She stood up and set her tea aside. I noticed that the cup was empty. I had never seen her take a drink. "Everyone, come with me." She tossed her hair. "Hiei."

Hiei responded to the call by walking very, very calmly over to us, shoes ringing like hollow gourds on the wooded floor. He took Genkai's seat and stared at me as if I were nothing more than a bug beneath a magnifying glass. The others all shuffled away after Genkai, leaving Hiei and I alone. The fact that his sword was missing gave me precious little comfort.

"Clear your mind," he said, eye drooping shut, "and keep your eyes closed."

I did as he said, trying to tune out the crackling fire and heat of the stuffy room, but English thoughts like _this is stupid _and _I wonder how long this is gonna take_ kept escaping my mental filters and bleeding into the calm static of my consciousness.

"That language of your is grating," Hiei said suddenly. I hadn't realized he was in my mind yet and my eyes flew open to find his Jagan gaping wide and staring, the purple of its iris shining like polished glass. I gasped on reflex, and he put a hand over his forehead. "Eyes. Shut," he hissed, and I squeezed my lids together until I saw stars. A good five minutes of failed mind-clearing later he said: "Stupid woman."

"I'm trying," I grumbled.

"Not very hard, obviously."

My teeth clenched like a beartrap. "Oh, shut up!" I said in English, and then in Japanese I added: "I can't think when you talk!"

"Good. You're not supposed to think."

I said nothing. Neither did he.

"Try focusing on an object," he said at last, "or a word."

I didn't respond verbally. Drawing up my memory of singing "Where is the Love" to Kuwabara, I focused on the way the drum had felt beneath my hands and the way the shocks had reverberated between my knees. The meanings of the lyrics—the ones that the tune and emotion of the piece inspired—washed over me. I think I may have started humming. The whole process of clearing my head suddenly seemed very easy. I did it every time I made music.

I didn't know what to expect when Hiei read my mind. Some fanfictions characterize the action as painless and quick, like a regular conversation that's just a bit more private. Others call it invasive, painful, and violating, as if the act of digging around inside someone's skull is tantamount to rape. But to me it felt like the tickle you get in the back of your throat when you know you're about to sneeze and don't, except that this tickle was in my brain and not my neck. I reached up to scratch my head on reflex as I felt a wave of itchy purple_ something_ glide around inside my head, poking and prodding at pieces of my memory and psyche with care I did not expect from the grumpy mind reader. Images flashed through my head like strips of film from different movies that had been grafted together by a six-year-old. Hiei started on the most recent memories, focusing for a minute or so on my recollection of making music with a drum in my cell.

"That tickles," I muttered in Japanese, squeezing my eyes shut, and he moved on like a roaming whisper.

Next he focused on my memories of wandering around in the forest by myself (I saw Kurama standing in a pool of sunlight, green eyes on fire, for just a second before the image changed), and then Hiei moved on to... .well, nothing. My mind became suffused in black for a few moments before I caught the picture of a knife sticking out of my shirt like a bloodstained battle standard, and I whimpered as he breezed away from that and backward to images of my time at college, then high school, then my childhood...

Little flashes of black popped in and out of existence between the film strips, and I wondered vaguely if those were the memories of Yu Yu Hakusho Koenma had so keenly smudged over.

The purple energy in my head moved away from memories of watching games of duck-duck-goose in kindergarten and back toward the present, settling down during my time at college. Hiei started looking at a choir concert in which the school choir performed one of the pieces I had written in composition class. He listened to my memory of that choir singing and the way I had hissed with pride when the sopranos clenched the harmonies I had so painstakingly arranged for several minutes before breaking away from my mind entirely. It felt like the purple itch drained out of my ears.

"Can I open my eyes now?" I asked.

"Yes."

When I did, I found Hiei staring at me again. His third eye was closed, a black line maring his tanned forehead. The stare he gave me, however, was completely different from the you-are-a-bug-and-I-am-resisting-the-urge-to-squish-you stare he had earlier employed. This stare just seemed... well, I don't quite know what it seemed like. It was almost as if Hiei didn't know what to make of me. I fidgeted beneath the power of his gaze, conscious of my unwashed skin and unkempt hair.

"Genkai," Hiei barked, eyes still keen on my face, and the sliding doors burst open to admit the main characters from my favorite anime series.

"So is she a spy or isn't she?" Yusuke snapped. Kurama, behind him, looked like he was about to vomit. Yukina and Botan lingered in the hallway, faces drawn like paranoid shutters.

"Yeah, don't keep us in suspense, Hiei," Kuwabara said as he moved to stand behind me.

Genkai walked to Hiei and placed a hand on his shoulder. "What can you tell me?"

He shrugged the psychic off of him with the barest of movements. "She told Kuwabara the truth."

That made me smile. Mission accomplished. Word. Up.

"But someone's tampered with her memory, blocking out the parts that led to her getting lost in the forest." He snorted. "Amateur didn't fill in the missing gaps. _She _doesn't even know if she's a spy at this point."

_Goddammit, Koenma,_ I thought, and I tried not to scowl. _And you seemed so sure of yourself, didn't you, Boy Wonder?_

"What do you recommend we do, then?" Genkai asked, and Yusuke—who had been whispering with Kuwabara—fell silent.

"We keep her here," Hiei said simply.

"Where she came from, her language, the gap in her memory... So many mysteries..." Genkai trailed off, eyes contemplative and serene. There was a dangerous edge deep within those eyes, too, though, and I was reminded of her sharp intelligence. I would have to watch what I said around her.

"Yes," said Hiei. "It's dangerous to let something this odd get away."

"Friends close, enemies closer," Yusuke said, cracking his knuckles. He leaned forward from the waist and stared me straight in the eye, a grin spreading across his mouth like spilled paint. "And all the while we'll be all over you, waiting for you to trip up and give yourself away, so don't get too comfortable, girlie."

My eye twitched (_Testosterone filled idiot, _I thought) and with a smile of my own I said: "It's hard to get comfortable with your ugly face so close to mine."

"Hey!" But despite his anger and the indignant protest I saw a bit of a smile threaten the corners of his lips as Kuwabara laughed like a drunken hyena, and I did my best not to look too preoccupied.

My mind, you see, had begun to race at the implications of Yusuke's words.

_We'll be all over you,_ he had said, _waiting for you to trip up and give yourself away._

Those words were what made me realize, for the first time since this whole mess began, just how dangerous living in this pool of sharks would actually be.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_3,666 words FTW! This was the longest chapter yet!_

_I hate writing scenes that contain all of the YYH characters in one room. The dynamics of the conversation get pretty tweaky. Who would speak the most, and would favoring them seem over the top? Who would speak the least, and would honoring their quiet personality seem like I was ignoring their existence? I want to avoid forming a repetitive Yusuke-then-Botan-then-Genkai-then-Kurama-then-Hiei-then-Kuwabara chain of dialogue that would continue unbroken into infinity. That would get real old real fast—hello, boredom!_

_Every chapter title so far was named for a song on my Zune. I'm surprised no one caught that trend yet, or at least mentioned it if they did notice. Today's chapter is titled after a song by Live of the same name. That band isn't necessarily my favorite, but hey, the song fit so I used it. Previous chapter titles were named for songs by the following artists: Say Anything, The Kings of Leon, Shinedown, Cold, and R.E.M._

_Many thanks to my awesome-sauce reviewers: c00ki3b4ndit, heve-chan, Delu, VampireOnFire, ShadowFireFox13, crossyourteez, Wolf-Cry-Night, DoilyRox, Dirge Of Chaos, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, lectaelf, rain chant, and Tomoshibi-chan! You are all fantastic gentlemen and ladies!_

_See you next Tuesday =]_


	9. Chapter 9: Dreams

Future Talk

Chapter 09:

"Dreams"

* * *

"You'll be staying in here," Yukina said as she opened the door to what had earlier been my holding cell. A moment of disappointment marked my reaction to this development: I had kind of been expecting a window, or at least a bigger room (Genkai was sure to have extra rooms that were better than this little coffin, right?). Her eyes practically bugged out of her face when she saw all the crap I had strewn about the floor after I had raided the junk closet. "Oh dear," she said, one delicate hand flying to touch her lips in a steadying gesture.

"I'll clean it up," I told her.

She nodded, eyes lingering on the junk as she said: "I'll go get you a futon." Then she left me alone with only Kurama for company.

"Would you like my help in tidying up?" he asked as he stepped into the room ahead of me. I walked past him and tugged the chipped rocking horse into a corner, disliking his use of the word 'tidy.' Who did he think he was, Mary Poppins?

"Um, sure. Just lay everything out so I can see it. Some might still be useable."

He chuckled in a way that made me think he was looking down on me, but he knelt to sort through the objects without a word despite that.

After deciding what to do with me, Genkai had asked Yukina to take me back to the room to get settled in. "I have many more questions to ask you," Genkai had said with another glare that reminded me of her hidden power, "but you're tired and those questions can wait until the morning."

"Let me go with them," Kurama had interjected, and after a moment of intense eye contact Genkai had agreed to let the three of us head to the room together. Now Yukina had left the fox and I alone, and as I pulled the huge green vase over to join the rocking horse I snuck a glance at my unlikely ally. His red hair gleamed in a way any model would envy beneath the wimpy bulb overhead, and his long fingers sifted through the assorted junk at his feet with all the delicacy of surgical instruments. He had great hands, I observed, with lengthy, tapered fingers and wide palms.

I looked down at my own hands. They were small and the fingers were a bit stubbier than I would have liked, and the callouses scattered all over them made them seem like the hands of a coarse farmer in comparison to Kurama's perfect and porcelain skin.

"What do you have so far?" I asked as I limped over to him, trying not to stare at his hands all the while.

"Not much," he said as he looked down at an empty wooden box with a broken lock, the metal pony and green robot toy I had noticed earlier, and a pewter hand mirror in relatively good condition.

I picked up the two toys and the box and carried them over to the bookcase. "These are cute," I said as I put the toys down, "and I think I can use the box for something." I glanced back at the mirror. "That mirror will look good after a polish, too."

He picked up the mirror and carried it over to me. I put it inside the box.

"Resourceful," he said. I didn't buy the compliment.

"More like a..." The Japanese phrase for 'pack rat' escaped me, so I settled on: "I don't like throwing things away."

"So this room might get even more cluttered?" he said, laughing at me.

"Maybe, maybe not," I said, trying to keep crossness from my voice.

We got back to work and, after what felt like at least an hour, we sorted through everything in the closet, dividing the mess into three sections: a pile of "broken" things (such as loose papers, scrolls torn beyond repair, broken pottery, inkless pens, mismatched and solitary shoes, and much more) and another pile of "resale" things (such as old books in relatively good condition, a box made of lacquered wood with only a few chips, unbroken crystal vases, and what appeared to be a gorgeous silk kimono in a box that the moths had not, by some miracle, manages to eat through). The last section encompassed everything else that I thought Genkai wouldn't care for but I could still get some good use out of: a prettily painted water pitcher with a broken handle, a set of tattered watercolors depicting traditional Japanese landscapes, and the aforementioned pony, robot, stuffed reindeer, lockless box, giant cracked vase, and rocking horse.

"You're keeping the horse?" Kurama asked me when I tie a length of rescued purple ribbon around its neck and knotted it into a massive bow.

"He has a sweet face," I said as I looked at its huge eyes and solemn mouth. I settled myself on top of him, and I was pleased to note that he didn't so much as creak under my weight. "See, he's a chair," I said. "I need all the chairs I can get." I noticed, then, that I had left the drum lying on the floor, and with a lurch I got to my feet and put it on the bookcase with all the other stuff.

"You're musical," Kurama said. It was phrased like a question but was not spoken like one.

"Kuwabara told you?" I asked, and Kurama nodded. "I'm better with the piano and the guitar," I said, "but I'm best with the—" I stopped talking, brow furrowed. What would the Japanese call that contraption, anyway?

"With the what?" Kurama pressed.

"Um... a sound mixer?" I said, using the noun for 'music' and the verb 'to mess up.' But Kurama just looked at me like I was crazy, and I sighed. "I am good at making music with digital media," I said, and his eyes lit up in recognition at last. "But I think I like to play real instruments the best. I need to improve my guitar playing, though, because I am rusty at playing it. My piano is the best real instrument I play." Mentally, I gave my face a good hard slap. Dear GOD I sounded repetitive! Childish! _Stupid!_ Damn Japanese...

"I would like to hear you play at some point," Kurama said as he gave me a slight bow. His hair tumbled over his shoulder in a garnet wave, and I felt a spear of jealousy stab through me. "Kuwabara speaks highly of your music from A-me-ri-ka."

I bowed right back at him and tried to cover my envy with a reply of: "I would be happy to play for you, Kurama-san."

Yukina walked in on us as we were both bowing at one another, and when her eyes popped open in surprise we hastily stood up. Her arms were filled with what I recognized as parts of the traditional Japanese futon: the shikibuton (the mattress-like part you sleep on top of), the kakebuton (AKA: the comforter), and the makura (or pillow). You could barely see her sweet face peeking over the top of her armload, and Kurama lunged like the gentleman he was to share some of her burden.

"Should we lay it out over here?" I asked as I gestured at the corner farthest from the closet. I was eager to get some sleep—all the walking and stress made me feel like collapsing at the nearest opportunity, and the futon looked soft, warm, and uncommonly inviting for something that was supposed to be laid on the floor.

Yukina, however, shook her head. "Please put it in the closet. You can't go to bed with such dirty feet, so I have prepared a bath for you, Dani-san."

My tiredness melted away. A bath, oh Lord, a bath! My feet had never felt so grimy before in all my life. Could Yukina read minds or something? That would certainly be funny considering her brother's eccentric abilities...

I mentally berated myself for thinking about that connection. I could get in a world of hurt if Hiei was nearby and... was 'listening' the right word?

Meanwhile, Kurama and Yukina moved to put the futon away. When the closet door opened to reveal bare shelves that had been swept clean of dust, Yukina gave a little gasp of pleasure and clapped her hands. "Perfect!" she said as Kurama put the futon on the top shelf. An alarm bell sounded in my head.

"Um," I said, "could you please put that on the lower shelf, Kurama-san?"

He shot me a questioning look over his shoulder.

"I'm short," I explained, "and I can't stand on a stool very well."

Another little bow was bestowed unto me. "Of course. I apologize."

"Oh, don't worry, please," I replied, and he put the bedding on the lowest shelf—one that was about level with my chest.

"I will escort Dani-san to the bath now," Yukina said, and she raised her head in an uncharacteristically proud way that conveyed leadership and responsibility. Her garnet eyes glimmered in the light overhead.

"Do you need me to—"

"We will be fine, Kurama-san," Yukina said firmly, cutting him off. She turned her face in my direction and smiled so warmly that I couldn't help but smile back. "If you will follow me, please."

I shot a glance at Kurama and bowed. "I will return your coat soon. Thank you."

He bowed back for the third time. "It was no trouble. Have a pleasant evening, Dani-san."

And so the two of us—a demon and a not-quite-anything-at-all— left the fox standing in that small casket of a room, alone with naught but a rocking horse for company.

"The bath is at the end of this hall," Yukina said as we walked down the wood paneled passageway. She moved with small, even steps that were easy to keep up with. "That is why we did not move you from your room and into a more populated area of the temple. Kuwabara suggested that you stay near the bath, because..."

She didn't need to look at my foot or say anything about my obvious disability; her sympathetic tone revealed it all.

"Thank you," I chose to say, because that response was neutral enough to change the subject.

The bath had a sliding door, as I expected it would, but that was all I had been able to predict about the setup. The inside of the bathroom, truthfully, reminded me of an onsen. Two curtained doorways marked 'men' and 'women' stood across from me (between them stood a huge rack covered in fluffy white towels), and moving past the curtain revealed a large communal bath with at least a dozen open showers and a huge, water filled tub that steamed up the air and made seeing a bit of a challenge. Wooden cubbyholes decorated the walls everywhere you looked, and several of them contained plastic shower caddies filled with toiletries. I also noticed a few freestanding wicker baskets, and I deduced that they were for dirty towels considering that one basket had a towel draped over the edge as if someone hadn't quite managed to drop it in all the way.

I glanced at Yukina, hoping to receive instructions on what I was to do next, but she had moved toward a nearby cubby to fetch one of the shower caddies. I envied her lithe body as she moved, legs moving freely beneath the somewhat constricting fabric of her pale blue kimono.

"These belong to Keiko-san, Yusuke-san's girlfriend," Yukina said as she placed the caddy next to one of the showers and the small stool that accompanied it. "She will not mind if you borrow them until we can buy you things of your own."

"I will thank her if I meet her," I said, and then there was an awkward moment in which neither Yukina nor I would really look at one another.

"I am sorry," she said at last, eyes fixed on the floor, "but I am not to leave you alone." She bowed low from the waist. "I am sorry," she repeated.

I had figured as much, and I quickly assured her that everything was fine despite the blush of self conscious embarrassment that spiked through my chest and cheeks. (To get over my nerves, I reasoned that Japanese people did this all the time, so I had better get used to public baths, then, hadn't I?) Yukina smiled at me and sat on a nearby stool, and as I unbuttoned Kurama's coat I felt grateful that she was not looking at me. But, in that moment, I needed her to look.

"Where should I put this?" I asked her, and she kept her eyes on my face as she took the coat away and folded it neatly across her lap. "Thank you," I said.

I set my cane aside, sat down on the stool, and went through the motions of washing my hair with Keiko's shampoo—I could not read the label very well, but the product looked expensive so I did not use much, and I forwent the conditioner in favor of paying extra attention to my dirty feet. Mud sluiced down the drain in a roiling wave, and I used my fingers and Keiko's bar of sweetly scented soap to cleanse every last trace of soil from between my toes and the overstated arch of my left foot.

When I felt that I was clean enough to get into the bath, I grabbed my cane, stood up, and said: "I will get in the bath now. Is that alright?"

Yukina looked up at me and nodded, and then she followed me over to the huge tub. I tried to slip into the water and I stumbled, but she steadied me by placing a pale hand on my arm. We exchanged wordless and nervous smiles as she took my cane and helped me get settled, and then she sat on the edge of the bath as I splashed around in pleasure. The hot water made my muscles all but liquify, and when I dunked my head under the surface of the water I stretched until my joints popped. I felt weightless, relaxed, warmed, cared for...

"I do not mean to pry," Yukina said when I surfaced for air, "but where are you from?"

"America," I said without hesitation as I flipped wet hair out of my face. Drops rolled down my forehead and into my eyes. "No one here has heard of it, but it is a large country."

She looked pensive. "Your energy is demonic," she said, "but it is human at the same time. Do you know why this is?"

I sighed. "I had never heard of demons until today, and this is the first time anyone has ever told me I felt like one." My heart fluttered. I disliked lying to such a sweet and warm person, but this story was my story and I was sticking to it. "You're a demon, right?" I asked after a moment's hesitance, and Yukina nodded.

"I am an ice demon," she said.

"There are different kinds?" I asked, playing up my lack of knowledge once again.

"Yes. Kurama can take the form of a fox, and Hiei's principle element is fire. We three are the only demons at the temple right now."

_Time to lay on the charm, _I thought as I schooled my features into a mask of pensiveness._ I need more allies._ "When Kuwabara told me about demons, I thought they would be scary. But you're really nice," I said to her. "I am grateful that I wound up among you and your friends, Yukina-san."

Her resulting smile could have melted a glacier, and the irony of that warmth was not lost on me. "Thank you," she said. "We will help you as best we can, Dani-san, so long as you trust us and continue to tell us the truth in all things."

My heart thudded in my chest like cannon fire, and with a smile that I hoped looked genuine I ducked under the water once again. Heat suffused my cheeks and scalp and stung the surface of my sensitive eyelids. "I'm ready to go back now," I said when I surfaced, and she immediately fetched a towel from the bathroom's antechamber. I stood up and blushed when she wrapped it around me the way my mother had done when I was a child, and as I began to attack my sopping hair with the towel she disappeared beyond the curtain once again. I managed to get out of the bath and dry off all on my own, and just as I had settled myself onto the lip of the tub she reappeared with a bundle of something tucked under one arm.

"Kuwabara-san and Yusuke-san both donated a little clothing until we can get you things of your own," Yukina said as she unfolded the bundle. She handed me, first, a huge button-up-the-front white shirt that fell almost to my knees; I had to roll the sleeves several times in order to expose my hands. "That shirt is Yusuke-san's," she said, "and these... well, these belong to Kuwabara-san."

I found myself looking a pair of blue boxers patterned with yellow rocket ships. I couldn't help but grin at them, and Yukina's cheeks turned a delicate shade of pansy pink. I slipped on the shorts and rolled the waistband to get them to stay up, and after I did I said: "Will you thank them for me tonight, Yukina-san?"

She nodded and handed me my cane (I hadn't even noticed that she was holding it). "I will," she said, "but for now, let's get you to bed. You must be tired."

The fatigue erased by the bath returned with gusto and the beginnings of a headache, and I yawned. Yukina giggled. "I'll follow you," I told her, and we marched off to my room.

Kurama and the piles of junk were both gone when we got back, and without preemptive Yukina and I took the futon from the closet and laid it out on the floor. I crawled beneath the comforter and curled into a ball, and with all the tenderness of a doting aunt Yukina sat down next to me and stroked my damp hair. The action made me feel a little bit uncomfortable—we weren't yet that familiar, were we?—but the sensation of personal space invasion disappeared when her fingertips glowed with an icy blue light and the ache pulsing in my temples vanished.

"Thank you," I said, wondering how she had known about my headache. Really, the mind reader thing was getting more and more plausible as time went on.

"It was nothing," she replied, and her eyes softened when they lit upon the bookshelf full of knick-knacks I had rescued from the garbage pile. She reached to pick up the stuffed reindeer with its fuzzy antlers and bright glass eyes. "Would you like to sleep with this?" she asked as she turned it over in her hands, studying it was a small smile.

I nodded and took the toy from her when she offered it. I liked to cuddle things in my sleep.

"I'll come by in the morning to wake you up for breakfast," Yukina said, and she stood up. Her crimson eyes gleamed an apology as she moved toward the door. "Forgive me," she said as she reached into her kimono and pulled out a small key, "but I can't leave the door unlocked, so..."

"It is fine," I said, and with one last smile she flipped the lightswitch to the off position and left me alone in the dark. "Good night, Yukina-san," I called as I heard the key slide the door's bolt home, and from the hallway I heard her reply: "Sweet dreams, Dani-san."

But my dreams that night were anything but sweet.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Is this considered a cliffhanger?_

_Dreams will play a big part in this story, by the way. Regard them with care. _

_This chapter went on a lot longer than I anticipated it would—about 3,500 words. Most of the recent chapters have far exceeded my minimum of 2,000 words promise. Good thing?_

_Title song credit goes to Fleetwood Mac! Oh, and Happy Valentine's Day, AKA S.A.D., Single's Awareness Day! _

_The next chapter, chapter 10, is finished, and I think it might be my favorite chapter so far (and it's definitely the longest one, too)!_

_Thanks SO MUCH to my fabulous reviewers both new and old, silver and gold (ignore that Olympics reference, please—I just finished watching the figure skating competition on TV and I'm a little bit pumped): colbub, c00ki3b4ndit, Delu, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, DoilyRox, DirgeOfChaos, Talye Kendrin, nekoFlein, Panda-chan31, ShadowFireFox13, WorldsAngel, mosinger, and heve-chan!_

_Special thanks to Dragon Of Twilight for going through and reviewing each and every chapter! I do not deserve such kindness (*bows profusely*)!_


	10. Chapter 10: Talks

Future Talk

Chapter 10:

"Talks"

* * *

His eyes swam in a sea of bitterness and tears as he smoothed her hair from her face, and you could hardly tell the color of the strands anymore thanks to the smears of blood and gore that decorated her like a macabre child's fingerpaints. Red goop bubbled out of her mouth and poured down her jaw, and when she coughed flecks of her blood splattered against his cheeks and lips.

"No," he said, and I could tell that he didn't quite believe what he was seeing yet. "No, no, please, I can't—"

She coughed again, and a hand with skin stripped clean cupped his face. Her tendons rubbed over one another with a spurt of blood; the only skin she had left was on her face. The rest of her body—bones, muscles, organs—lay bare for the world to see.

"Ko..."

"Don't speak, I can heal you, I can—" he babbled.

"Koenma," Botan said before the life left her eyes and her skinless hand fell to the dirty ground, "Koenma, _run_."

* * *

I sat up in the dark and tried not to retch, nausea overtaking me at the memory of my dream and Botan's naked hand.

_Did the Beasts do that to her?_

The thought came to me unbidden. I shivered and felt another wave of nausea pass over me and disappear into the gloom. I hugged the reindeer to my chest and wiped the sweaty hair off my forehead. The comforter clung to my legs like sticky canvas, and it suddenly felt oppressive so I threw it off and shivered in the sudden cold.

What the hell was I _up against_, anyway?

Thoroughly awake after seeing an image that would have made Rob Zombie go pale, I groped around in the dark for my cane and gave up after about two minutes of futile fumbling. Hoping that I was heading in the right direction, I crawled on all fours until I located the door and the light switch right next to it. Illumination flooded the room and made me squint, but I didn't let it stop me from crawling to the bookcase and, as a result, the drum.

Music always helped me think. Even as a child I had retreated to the magical world of music (and yes, I am aware of just how cheesy that sounds) when the going got tough. Now—_especially _now—was no different, and the drum felt even more comforting that the stuffed reindeer when I clenched it between my knees and began to pound out a weird little rendition of Coheed & Cambria's "Delirium Trigger."

_It was only a dream,_ I thought as I sang and played and distracted myself. _Only a dream. Yeah. I can believe that. There's no way I could have seen an image like that. I wasn't there when the Beasts took over!_

I followed "Delirium Trigger" with "Dirt Room" by Blue October, and when I got to the second verse I heard something moving in the hallway—a rustle of cloth followed by the creak of a floorboard. I stopped singing and fell quiet, heart flying into my mouth.

"Is someone there?" I called after a minute or two of intent listening. The noise did not repeat itself. "Hello? Is it morning yet?"

But after a few seconds I heard a set of quiet footsteps retreat down the hallway, and I put the drum away and turned out the light. Going back to bed and a potential repeat of that dream felt odd, and I had no intention of sleeping again. But, somehow, the darkness and the firm mattress beneath me and the coolness of the room lulled my racing mind to sleep.

As I drifted off, another thought occurred to me.

If it _wasn't_ just a dream, how had I known how Botan died?

* * *

"Would you like some breakfast, Dani-san?"

I rolled over and buried my face in my pillow with a noncommittal moan.

"I have miso soup, fish, and rice in the kitchen. Will you eat those?"

I moaned again.

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't hear you, Dani-san."

I rolled over and blinked at the light bulb overhead. The thing had been pretty dismally dim last night, but this morning it was much too bright for my sleepy eyes to take. Yukina helped matters, however, by standing over me, and she cast a shadow on my face that blocked out most of the harsh light. Her hair looked as it had the day before, but I noticed dark smudges on the pale skin beneath her eyes.

"What time is it?" I mumbled as I sat up, rubbing my eyes with two fingers. I groped blindly for my cane with a yawn, hearing the muscles in my shoulders crack and pop as I moved.

"Seven," Yukina said, and my eyes popped open wide. She laughed at my comically shocked face. "Genkai does not believe in wasting the day on sleep, and she wants to see you." Her lips crinkled in a smile. "And meals run on a tight schedule here. You can sleep longer if you wish, but you will miss breakfast."

My traitorous stomach chose that moment to growl like a starved wildebeest.

"I'll get up," I said hastily. I found the cane at last and threw off the covers. Yukina picked the comforter up straight away and folded it over her arm, and it took me a moment to realize that she wanted to put the futon in the closet. I blushed and proceeded to help her fold and store the bedding, feeling like the poster child for slobs everywhere. I wouldn't have touched the damn thing had she not prompted me.

_Shows how well I'm adjusting to Japanese culture,_ I thought to myself, face twisting into a scowl.

"Is something wrong?" Yukina asked when she noticed my tense expression.

"No," I was quick to assure her. "I'm just a bit tired. I'm not used to so much... excitement."

"That's a good word for it," Yukina said. "Excitement, I mean."

We walked out of the room at that point, and Yukina did not lock it behind her. The kitchen was about a five minute walk away through narrow, twisting halls lined with wood and not much else, and the kitchen itself was little better by way of decor. Despite the surprisingly new appliances and the squeaky clean white tile floor, all of the pots and pans hanging from racks on the ceiling looked old and well worn as they glimmered dully in the meager sunlight streaming in through the kitchen's three windows. A battered teakettle whistled on top of a gleaming stove, and five people sat around the wooden table in the spacious room's center: Kuwabara, Yusuke, Genkai, Botan, and Kurama. Empty places had been set for three more, and two of them had food waiting to be eaten. The last place held nothing but a place mat.

Kuwabara spotted me first, as he was one of the three people (Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Botan) facing the kitchen door. "Yukina-chan! Dani-san!" he said. Four other heads swiveled in my direction.

"Good morning, Yukina-san, Dani-san," Kurama said as he turned to look at me, and he gestured toward the empty place on his left. "Sit down and eat with us."

"Thank you," I said as I went to take my seat. Botan, meanwhile, moved to take the teakettle off the burner, and as Yukina settled into the spot next to me Botan leaned over to fill the ice apparition's cup.

"Would you like tea?" she asked me, and when I nodded she poured a healthy amount into my mug. "My name is Botan, by the way, and that's Yusuke over there, and you're Dani, right?"

"Yes," I said, and I thought: _Good impression time starts NOW._ "It is nice to meet you, Botan-san."

"You too, you too. Sorry for not introducing myself yesterday, but things were a teensy bit awkward when you first got here, so I'm sorry if I cam across as mean-spirited or cold. But that's over now and we're all friends here, so make yourself at home and think of me as an older sister, or at the very least a very good friend, OK, Dani-san?"

I closed my gaping mouth and—once I thought I understood everything she had said in her much too rapid language—I nodded at her. "I would like that," I said, and she beamed with eyes the color of cotton candy.

"Eat!" she exclaimed, and she took her seat next to Yusuke once again.

I tried not to fidget as I used chopsticks to spoon rice into my mouth. Eating such salty food for breakfast felt weird on my American taste buds, but as I drank my soup and picked at the grilled fish in front of me I did my best not to think about pancakes dripping in syrups, waffles with whipped cream, danishes, donuts, lattes and mocha...

"Hey," Yusuke said suddenly, setting down his chopsticks with a clack. I nearly spilled my soup in surprise. "Sleep well?" he asked.

"Yusuke," Genkai said in a quiet voice, a warning lying like a venomous snake in her tone.

I responded to his question anyway. It wasn't like I could avoid him, right? But I was still wary of him after his words from the night before, so I replied with a simple and cautious: "Yes."

"Good." He spooned some rice into his mouth. "Contact your little friends yet, spy?"

I froze, unsure of how to react to that even though it wasn't true in the slightest, and Yusuke laughed.

"Told you I'd be on your ass," he said. He pointed the chopsticks at me, and even though I was just a neophyte to Japanese culture I knew that the gesture was rude. "Gotta stay on your toes, Dani." He used no honorific after my name.

"I will be sure to stay on them, Yusuke-_san_," I retorted, emphasizing the 'san' with a hiss.

That got a laugh out of him. "Loosen up, spitfire. We're all friends here... unless, of course, you have something else planned."

"I'm planning on throwing this soup in your face, if that is what you mean. You probably won't want to be my friend after that." My cheeks began to flame; the words had just slipped out. But, it seemed, I had reacted correctly, because Kuwabara began to laugh at Yusuke's bewildered expression and even Kurama chuckled. Botan and Yukina both looked at me with expressions hovering between shocked and congratulatory.

"That's enough, Yusuke," Genkai snapped. She pushed her chair away from her tea cup and stood, and I noticed with a suppressed chuckle that her chest barely cleared the tabletop. "I'll be back in a minute. Finish your food, Dani. We have work to do." And then she was gone, stalking out of the room like a caged lioness.

I began to shove the food in my mouth, not wanting to keep her waiting or piss her off over something as stupid as not eating to her standards.

"Don't mind him," Kurama murmured from my left as he took a sip from his soup. I glanced at Yusuke; he was in the middle of stealing food from Kuwabara. "He can be a bit crude, but once he gets to know you he'll be more civil."

"I hope so," I said in a low voice, and Kurama smiled at me.

"Would you like anything more to eat?"

I slurped down the last gulp of my soup and threw back the mug of tea, nearly scalding myself with the hot beverage in the process. "I'm fine, thank you," I choked out. Kurama laughed like wind in the trees and handed me a napkin; I wiped my lips with it just as Genkai burst back into the room with a long blue scroll tucked under one arm.

"Clear her dishes," the psychic barked, and Kurama had both my plates and his balanced atop one of his wide palms in a nanosecond. He barely had them out of the way, however, when Genkai unfurled the scroll with a whuff of displaced air and slammed it down in front of me. Dust puffed into my eyes, making them water and run as I sneezed the dust away.

"A-me-ri-ka," Genkai said over the sound of my allergy attack. "Where is it?"

I stared down at the map before me. "It's right here," I said, raising my finger on reflex to point at the left side of the map, but then I stopped. I stared. My mouth gaped open and chewed on empty air for a second before snapping shut with a clack of teeth on teeth.

"Well?" Genkai asked.

The map boggled my mind. It looked nothing like the version of the world that graced the inside cover of my high school geography textbook, and the biggest reason for the differences lay in the fact that the _entire western hemisphere appeared to be missing_.

"It's not here," I said in a hoarse voice that didn't sound like me at all.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that American is not here." I placed my finger on the map and traced an outline of the continent of my birth in the empty ocean. "It should be right here, but it's not."

Japan looked like a dragon who had gorged himself on too many cattle; the island chain looked bloated and top heavy, and China, across from it, stretched taller and broader than I was used to seeing. Africa was there, as was India and Russia, but the European continent bled off into the sea in a slew of tiny islands, and Australia looked like an oversized monster. But where America should have been lay a vast expanse of empty sea, and my fingers grazed over it for a long time before I raised my head to meet Genkai's insistent gaze.

"Show me where it should be," she said, and I pointed again. She produced a pencil from out of nowhere, and with the lightest of sketches I traced a vague outline of both north and south America in their respective positions. I labeled the general region of the United States with an 'x' and took a moment to write out the phonetic spelling of 'America' in katakana.

"It should be right here," I said, and I felt the shameful sting of tears build behind my eyes. I blinked and swallowed, trying to force back the rising tide of hysteria, but soon I let out a short sob and had to bury my face in my hands to keep everyone from seeing me break down.

"There there," Botan said, and I felt her fingers glide over my neck in an attempt to soothe me. "We'll find your home, I promise."

But they wouldn't find it, not ever, because I was realizing—too little too late, of course—just how far from home I really was.

* * *

They let me go outside a little while later. Everyone cleared out of the kitchen soon after my breakdown, and then Kurama asked Genkai if he could take me for a short walk. The psychic, after taking a look at my swollen eyes, had agreed. "I have things to take care of," she said, and with a commanding cry of "Come with me, Botan," the old woman and the spirit guide had left the room. Yukina and Kuwabara washed dishes at the sink together, and Yusuke... I'm not sure where he went, but I was glad he was gone.

The outside air was crisp, cool, and yet not cold enough to bother me and my bare legs. Kurama led me down the long, wide porch and around the corner of the temple, and I realized that I recognized the place.

"This is where I saw the others for the first time," I said, and Kurama nodded as we slowly made out way forward. "Oh, Bob-san."

"What?" Kurama asked, turning around to look at me, but I was distracted by the small stone monk hiding in his patch of tall brown grass.

"Bob-san," I repeated as I pointed finger at the monk. "That's what I named him." With a grunt I sat down on the edge of the porch and swung my legs over its side. "Whoopsies!" I said as I slid off the porch and onto my good foot.

"You're more agile than you look," Kurama said as he jumped to the ground without hesitation.

"Eh, I get around," I said as I knelt and parted the grass to reveal the little monk to the world. "Slowly, of course, but I still get around."

"Hiei told us about your leg," Kurama said, and I paused to look up at him in surprise. "He saw it in your memory," Kurama clarified, and I looked away. The sun caught his hair just right when I looked at him from this angle, with the dirt and grass as soft and moist as a sponge beneath my knees.

"What exactly did he tell you?" I asked, cautious to inquire in a place where I didn't belong.

Kurama sat down on the grass next to me. "Just that you've had it all your life," he said, as he plucked a blade of grass and began to twine it through his long fingers, "and that you can cope with it. You don't tend to back down from anything."

Let me be the first to admit that this irked me. I didn't want people poking around inside my head, let alone people who were liable to draw really odd conclusions from snippets of incomplete memories. "I'm pretty normal," I told Kurama. "Just slower than most when it comes to walking, that's all."

His eyes bored into mine like chips of reinforced malachite. "You can't honestly tell me that most cripples would choose to_ run_ from someone like Hiei, can you?" He used no honorific after the fire demon's name, I noticed. "Even when he had you cornered you struggled to get away, like you could actually accomplish something. It was a futile gesture and yet you did it without a second thought."

"So I'm just stupid, then."

"Either that or unnaturally brave."

"Some say stupidity and bravery are the same thing."

"But I'm not one of them," Kurama said.

I reached out and caressed the monk's smooth skull. The stone felt warm beneath my hand, heated as it was by the spring sun overhead. "I don't like being underestimated," I said softly. "I walk funny and I'm short. So what?"

Kurama shrugged and looked up at the sky. The blue above reflected into his eyes, turning them the color of newly opened leaves. "So nothing. You're short and you walk funny, but you're braver than you think you are." He looked at me, then, and grimaced. "Hiei told us about how you... well, died."

Confusion made my thoughts fuzzy. "Didn't Kuwabara-san tell you?"

"No. Should he have?"

"Well, I told him about it, so I assumed..."

A pensive look washed over Kurama's features. "He probably didn't want to sway our opinions of you. When Hiei told us about your heroics, my first instinct was to treat the memories as implanted trickery meant to catch us off our guard. Had Kuwabara-san been the first to tell us, we would no doubt have been quicker to reject you." He chuckled. "Kuwabara-san is smarter than he lets on, I think."

"He is a very good person," I agreed, and we sat in silence for many minutes before Kurama stood and extended a hand with which to help me up. "So what happens now?" I asked as he pulled me to my feet.

"Genkai sent Botan to inform the higher authorities of this new development—your vanishing homeland and everything, I mean."

My heart stopped and then began to thud at triple speed. Some of my discomfort must have shown on my face because Kurama frowned and said: "Dani-san, you do not look well. Would you like to sit down?"

"Authorities? The police? Have I done something wrong?" I sputtered, trying to cover what I was really thinking: _Holy shit, Koenma, what if he comes here and what will I do when I see him? Don't freak out, Dani, don't freak—_

"You're in no trouble," Kurama assured me as my breath hitched in my throat. "We just want the Spirit World to know what's going on."

"Spirit World? Why do they need to know?" My voice had taken on a hysterical edge, and I couldn't help it when my knees started to shake.

"Dani-san, you _died_," Kurama said firmly, placing his hands on my shoulders in a steadying gesture. "The Spirit World is in charge of all the souls whose bodies have died, and you fall into that category even though you seem to have a body of your own."

An unforeseen thought occurred to me, one that made my blood run the temperature of a stream in Alaska. "Will they kill me again?" I asked, voice shaking at the thought of a prospect neither the future Koenma nor I had envisioned.

Kurama looked appalled at the suggestion. "Absolutely not!" he said, and his fingers tightened on my shirt. "No one wants you dead, Dani-san, least of all the people in the Spirit World."

I tried to calm down, taking deep, cleansing breaths to clear my head, and when I finally managed to blink my eyes back into focus Kurama let his hands drop from my shoulders. I stared at Bob-san for a long time, drawing strength from his wise, cheerful face.

But Kurama shattered that peace with his next words. "You have nothing to fear from the Spirit World. They just need to figure out _why _you still have your body—you don't even remember how you got it, and we need to figure that out before..."

"Before what?" I snapped, seeing an opening to get some juicy information. "Before you write me off as an enemy or execute me or send me back to where I came from?"

Kurama said nothing, eyes darkening with a dangerous glimmer that I didn't understand.

I crossed my arms over my chest and looked away. I needed to dig for information, to get on this demon's good side and to make him my ally, but the look on his face told me I had overstepped a tremulous line. However, I couldn't just change the subject without _seeming_ like I was calculating our conversation (there were lines, yes, but they were lines I wasn't even supposed to _know _about, let alone cross), so I kept going. "You keep dropping hints that 'things are tense' and that I 'came at a bad time,'" I said, "but I can't even defend myself because no one will tell me what the hell is going on!"

"It's not that simple, Dani-san."

"Maybe not, but I still feel like I've been left in the dark." I sniffed a bit, tears that had little to do with deception rising up again. "I don't know you or anyone else very well at all, but you and Yukina-san and Kuwabara-san have all been so nice to me, and... and I _died_, Kurama-san. My parents must be worried sick."

I started to cry, tears running down my cheeks in rivers, and that was _not_ part of the plan to get info. I felt, with horror, the beginnings of a runny nose set in, but a tidal wave of sadness sent my embarrassment running for the hills. Visions of my mom's short blonde hair flashed into my head; was she so torn up over my death that she neglected her dye job appointments? Were her deep chocolate roots shining through her cornsilk hair like rot peeking out from a veneer of glossy paint? And Dad... I could imagine that short, bespectacled man sitting at the kitchen table with a beer in his hand, poring over legal documents detailing the case against my killer with all of his skills as a top-notch lawyer. He would fight for me with a vengeance, pouring all of his grief and passion into the process of avenging me.

Kurama let me cry for many minutes before he put his hand on my head and ruffled my pale brown hair with unexpected gentleness.

"I'll speak with the others," Kurama said in a soft, soothing voice, "to see what I'm allowed to tell you. If you're not connected to this situation at all, then I don't see the problem of letting you into our world... especially since your homeland is gone. This world might very well become your own."

Even through my tears I managed to think _Jackpot!_, and a part of me felt proud of the progress I had made.

Another part of me, however, felt like a lying, conniving bitch, and I hated myself and the sympathetic expression I had inspired in the depths of Kurama beautiful green eyes.

* * *

NOTE:

Incredibly long chapter. Took a lot to write, so I hope you liked it!

I want to tha


	11. Chapter 11: Under the Bridge

Future Talk

Chapter 11:

"Under the Bridge"

* * *

I spent the next two days very simply. Each day began with a wake up call by Yukina; the ice apparition then helped me fold and put away the futon before escorting me to breakfast. I would help wash the dishes afterward, and then Kurama would take me for a walk around the temple grounds (I tried not to compare myself to a dog during these walks, but this proved difficult). Lunch came not long after, and once I ate I would retire to my room for a nap and a little relaxation—I'm ashamed to admit that my walks with Kurama wore me out, because I am absolutely, one-hundred percent completely not athletic. Physical therapy only gave me so much muscle mass, after all, and my petite frame does little to compensate for my deformity and inborn weakness.

After drumming and dozing (and thinking about my next move; I learned nothing of value over those two days) for an extended period of time, Yukina would fetch me once again for dinner. Everyone then retreated to the room with the giant fireplace for after-dinner tea, and after conversation and general tomfoolery on the parts of Yusuke and Kuwabara we would all part ways for bed. Botan, Yukina and I all bathed together in the onsen-like bathroom, and then I slept in borrowed clothes graciously donated by various members of the temple crowd.

I saw little of Hiei during this time—only once did I catch a glimpse of a shadow flitting over the temple roof during a walk with Kurama, but that might have been nothing more than a trick of the light or a fault in my vision.

The third day started just like the previous ones. I was up before Yukina came to get me, and when she knocked I called: "Come in!"

"You're awake!" she cried as she unlocked the door. "And you've even put the futon away, Dani-san!"

I grinned at her, doing my best to look cheerful. I was anything _but _happy, however—'stressed' was more the word for it. I hadn't been able to get anything concerning the book or the book's potential thief out of anyone, and I had been too afraid to talk to Kurama about it again. I knew him (or, I thought I knew him) well enough to know that he would not appreciate prying in the slightest.

"Breakfast isn't quite ready yet," Yukina continued, "but you can come down to the kitchen anyway. We have a guest you have not met yet."

My heart did a flipflop or two before settling back down into its accustomed rhythm. "Who?" I asked, trying to sound piqued and interested.

My act, apparently, worked. "His name is Koenma," Yukina said without an ounce of suspicion. "He's from the Spirit World, and he will help us decide what's best for you."

_I hope I get some say in that decision,_ I thought numbly, and when Yukina left the room I followed, every step feeling like I was wading through gelato. My mind raced around itself in circles as I felt bile rise in my throat. What if his face reminded me of the Future Koenma and I broke down or something equally ridiculous? The past few days had shown me that even I had a hard time predicting the path of my confused emotions, so what if Koenma's emotionally charged face resonated with my memories in such a way that I did and said things that would expose my true motives?

Fear made my vision blur, but I forced the feeling aside and carried on behind Yukina, concentrating in the cool wood beneath my mismatched feet in lieu of what was to come. It would do no good to freak out over this before I even saw the man... god... demigod. _After all,_ I decided as we neared the kitchen door, _this is just like a shot. The worrying before the shot is worse than the sting of the needle._

Everyone sat in their normal places: Yusuke and Kuwabara facing the door, Genkai at the table's head, Kurama with his back to the me and Yukina. Botan stood by the stove and was busy filling plates with food. But the place opposite Genkai's at the far end of the long table, which normally stood empty and plateless, at last had an occupant.

As I took my customary seat at Kurama's right, I did my best not to stare at Koenma's honey brown eyes and mahogany hair. He was looking at me, sizing me up for a purpose I did not know, and I noticed in a vague sort of way that his clothing was spotless and tailored, unmarred by the dirt and grime his future self would one day sport. That blue pacifier his future incarnation lacked was clutched between his teeth, and it looked worlds more realistic than the globular object he sported in the anime. This version was also much more absurd looking: it had a little ring on the end of it and everything. His hair was trimmed, too, and he lacked subtle facial lines that I had subconsciously noticed but not actually thought about on the Future Koenma. The effect was a younger, less wise looking Koenma, and for that I was grateful.

For whatever reason, I felt that this Koenma wasn't _my _Koenma at all, and none of my emotions decided to stage a coup.

"Dani-san," Yukina said as she helped me push my chair toward the table, "this is Koenma-san. He is here to help you."

I smiled, still hesitant to be around him. "It is good to meet you," I said.

"Genkai told me about your A-me-ri-ka," he said abruptly, cutting straight through the niceties the way a knife cuts through butter. I noticed, then, that his right hand was bandaged, but I had no idea how far up his arm the bandages extended because his sleeves were long. He juggled the pacifier to the corner of his mouth in order to speak clearly. "It's never existed here. Considering your energy signature, I thought to check the Demon World maps, too, but it's not there either. We have no record of your life, your name, or your country. Frankly, you don't exist." He leaned forward over the tabletop, looking past Yukina (who sat between us) to frown at me. "So what are you, anyway? Kurama said he asked, when he met you, if you were a demon or a human, and you said you were both. But then Kuwabara said that you'd never heard of demons. That doesn't add up."

The silence in the kitchen was worse than any screaming, and I sat there, petrified, while I tried not to cry or freak out or faint under the shocked stares of the people I was trying to deceive. Thoughts ran wild through my brain. How had I made such a _stupid_ mistake? I had forgotten what I told Kurama and then I had said something completely different to Kuwabara! Now I had zero chance of gaining their trust, all because I was a little idiot who tried to get Kurama interested in me by telling him that I had demon blood in me, _me_, the girl who had come back to life and swapped realities and had to speak a weird language—

Wait... but that wasit! _Even when I'm dumb I'm brilliant, _I thought. _Hello, panic!_

"Kurama-san asked me if I was a demon?" I asked, and I laughed as I shot the stock-still-and-staring fox demon an apologetic glance. "Oh, is _that _what you were saying, Kurama-san?"

"Yes, it was," Koenma snapped, confusion and the dislike of being ignored making him jumpy.

"Oh," I said as I turned back to Koenma with a shrug. "Well, in my language, 'youkai' is very similar to the word—" I racked my brain and came up with: "'yew-kai-chew,' which means 'to be alive.' So my response made sense at the time."

"... did it, now?"

"Yeah. Because he asked if I was alive—or, at least, I thought he asked me if I was alive—but I'd just seen myself die, you see, so I thought I was both alive _and_ a human and... well, it got muddled. Shock, I guess." I forced another laugh and Botan plopped my breakfast plates down in front of me. I took a swig of my tea to keep from nervous-fidgeting. Koenma was staring at me through narrowed eyes, suspicion and animosity lying naked in his expression. Everyone else began to pick up their chopsticks or sip tea or stir their soup, but no one dug into the food so I knew that this incident wasn't merely water under the bridge just yet.

"Koenma, sir," Botan said in a low voice as she put her hand on his shoulder. "I don't think Dani-san means us any ill will. She has been nothing but cooperative these past three days, and pointing fingers at her won't solve any problems. You'll only stress her out more. After all, Hiei did verify that she has no memories of wanting to hurt us or steal the Book."

A beat of silence, and then:

"What Book?" I asked, and I had to use every ounce of self restraint not to smile with unabashed and triumphant glee. Leave it to Botan to blow this case wide open for me!

Yusuke, it seemed, possessed similar sentiments. "Great GOING, Botan!" he screeched, shooting out of his chair. Kuwabara, beside him, spat out a gooey mouthful of rice and fish in shock. A grain clung to his chin comically and Genkai responded to the hullabaloo by pillowing her face in one gnarled hand.

"You just had to go and open your big mouth, didn't you?!" Koenma hissed, spinning around in his seat to shoot the reaper a death glare. Yukina, beside me, gave a little gasp of horror, but she did not react as violently as the others. Kurama let out a defeated sigh and took a long pull from his tea.

"Now, now," Botan said, raising her hands in front of her as Koenma and Yusuke literally backed her into a corner of the kitchen. She had a penchant for over exaggerated facial expressions that seemed to jive very well with her anime counterpart, and right then she was using the please-don't-kill-me-face that I knew so well from some of my favorite episodes. "Let's not be hasty, boys, it was just a slip of the tongue and—"

"It was quite a slip, Botan," Kurama sighed, mopping his face with one of his hands. He shot me a glance from between spread fingers, green glimmering between spears of porcelain skin. "The abridged version, Dani-san, is that we have an object—a book, as you may have guessed—here at the temple that many dangerous people wish to make use of."

I scowled. "You mean you couldn't tell me _that _much?"

"Well... it's a valuable book."

"Oh. Well, never mind," I huffed, and I picked up my chopsticks. "I don't even like to read all that much." That was a lie, of course, but I wouldn't admit it. The rice tasted like sand in my mouth, threatening to choke me, but I swallowed it anyway. "And back off of Botan-san, you two—I'm not going to steal your stupid book, so you can relax."

Botan mouthed 'Thank you' around an infuriated Koenma, who was looming over her with a vein pulsing madly in his forehead.

"Now that the proverbial cat's out of the bag, I suppose there's no use hiding things from Dani any longer," Genkai said, and she quieted both Koenma and Yusuke with her patented glare before addressing me. "The Book was stolen from the Spirit World—from Koenma, specifically—by a human spiritualist who calls himself Seishou."

"Friggin' original name, right?" Yusuke griped as he slumped back into his chair.

Genkai continued as if she had not heard. "He projected his soul into limbo and was escorted by a junior shinigami to the Spirit World, where he then proceeded to break into the vaults and steal the Book."

I suppressed a sigh when I realized that I had to play the role of an ignorant newcomer yet again. "Wait, shinigami?" I asked, putting down my chopsticks in order to appear interested. "Those exist?"

"Bingo!" Botan chirped.

"This blue haired idiot is a senior shinigami, for all the good she does me," Koenma said, and Botan smiled sheepishly down at her food as she regained her chair. I 'oh'-ed.

Genkai glowered at Koenma over her cup of steaming tea. "Of course, had Koenma been properly prepared for any incident, this whole mess could have been avoided from the outset."

"Hey, he caught me off my guard," the deity grumbled. "Mediums who can project their souls that well and still use their spirit energy while in limbo only come once in a century."

"We have the Book here at the temple," Kurama said, segueing neatly back on topic, "and we will keep it under constant guard until Seishou and his lackeys are put securely in a Spirit World jail."

"Wait, why not take it back to the vault? Now that you know what that medium guy can do, shouldn't you be able to defend it better there?" I asked, knowing full well what the answer to that question was. Need I reiterate that I had to play along?

Kurama shook his head. "The Book has a sentience of its own, it seems, and it reacted quite violently to being taken across the border back into Spirit World."

At that point I couldn't help but glance at Koenma's bandaged hand, which was lying still upon the breakfast table. When he saw me looking he retracted the limb and put it out of sight in his lap. He didn't look at me as he did it.

"Truth be told," Genkai said suddenly, making me jump, "we're not sure what the book can actually do."

"Which is why we can't let Seishou get his hands on it again," Botan concurred.

"You showed up the day after we got the Book back from him," Kuwabara interjected. He had wiped the rice from his chin and was grinning at me, showing most of his teeth although not in an unpleasant way. "That's why we were so suspicious of you, Dani-san." He punched Yusuke in the arm. "Dang, it feels good to tell her all this."

Yusuke punched him back, harder, and Kuwabara yelped. "She could still be a spy," the ex spirit detective snapped. "We can't get too comfortable around her."

"I agree," Koenma said. Everyone fell quiet and looked at him, but he only had eyes for Genkai. I got the feeling, in that moment, what the power dynamics of this little group were. Koenma had the highest level of official authority of course, but it was Genkai who had the most influence with the detectives and the sheer stubborn attitude born to a natural leader. "I say we keep her here until I can find out exactly where she came from, and once we find her home we send her back."

"That could take weeks," Genkai said. "Months, even. What will we do in the meantime? And what if you can't find her home at all? What will we do with her then?"

"Yes, Genkai's right! And she doesn't even have her own clothes!" Botan added.

"Make her comfortable, then!" Koenma said as he reached up to massage his temples. Golden-brown eyes squeezed shut in frustration as he threaded his hands—one bandaged and one healthy—through his hair. "I'll have my workers search every book in the Spirit World for a mention of A-me-ri-ka for one month, and after that we'll reassess the situation. But until then, Dani-san will live here and work for you, Genkai, if you say that's permissible."

Genkai nodded. "She can stay," she said.

"I don't get a say in this," I said, not bothering to phrase my words like a question. I didn't relish the thought of going to 'work' for the hard-nosed psychic. What exactly would that entail? Polishing her beds of nails and feeding the beasts in her forest?

"You've got no choice at all," Koenma snapped, turning his eyes at last to me. "Just do as your told and keep out of trouble. The better you behave the better we'll treat you, so don't go sticking your nose where it doesn't belong or where it's liable to get chopped off; do I make myself clear?"

I gulped. "Crystal," I said.

"Good." He stood up, pushing his chair away from the table with a violent protest of wooden chair legs sliding across linoleum. "I'll be going now. The sooner we get her out of our hair the better we'll be able to focus on catching that thief."

"Koenma, sir!" Botan yelped as she shot to her feet. "Do I have your permission to use _that_?"

I had no idea what she meant by the word 'that', and visions of Botan wielding torture instruments and a deranged smile made thinking a bit of a challenge. Kuwabara and Yusuke, meanwhile, had frozen as still as statues.

Koenma shot her a measuring look that possessed a sudden undercurrent of trepidation. Interesting. "Only if you promise not to go overboard like the last time," he said.

"I will be the portrait of a wise consumer," Botan replied solemnly.

"I'm getting a bad feeling about this," the deity muttered, and then he turned to everyone once more. "Contact me with any further updates on Dani-san and Seishou." His eyes glittered with tiredness and focus. "You know where to find me," he said, and he flounced out of the room with a swirl of red cloak.

He wasn't gone for more than a moment when Botan did a strange little leap of joy and pirouetted around in a circle. "I get to use it!" she screeched, and then she leaned over the table to grab me by the hands. "Isn't this exciting, Dani-san?!"

"Um, sure?" I said.

"No, it's definitely not," Yusuke and Kuwabara said in unison. They looked at each other with sour expressions.

"Oh, come on, you two, it's not that bad of an experience!" Botan snapped, and the boys shrank into their seats.

"I'm afraid I don't get it," I said, and Botan grinned and ran out of the room.

"This happens occasionally, and it is the bane of Yusuke's and Kuwabara's existence," said Kurama. He smiled at me first and then the gloomy boys. "But I'll go too, you two, to lessen the embarrassment."

"It's not embarrassing for you, Kurama, because you can just wear a skirt and people will think you're a girl."

The fox's resulting death glare could have melted solid marble, and to cover his fear Yusuke began to steal and stuff Kuwabara's leftovers into his mouth. Kuwabara got a glare, too, for laughing into his hands and turning red with mirth.

Botan burst back into the room and tossed a bundle of cloth at me. The pieces of clothing within bounced off my chest and onto my lap, and I saw that they consisted of denim pants, a button-up black shirt, and a pair of black sandals.

"Get dressed right now!" Botan said as she whipped a cell phone from the pocket of her jeans.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on?" I said as Yukina helped me out of my chair and onto my feet.

"Hello, yes, we need a cab..." Botan said, and she rattled off Genkai's address. A pause followed, and then: "Oh, don't give me that, I know it's a long way out but we have the money to pay, and—"

"Botan got Koenma's credit card," Yukina whispered in my ear as we left the room. "I think she wants to take you shopping."

My mind connected everything in that moment: boys meant pack mules, and Botan meant lots and lots of shopping bags. And, more importantly, it meant _my_ shopping bags. Clothes! Shampoo! _Underwear!_ That last one was by far the most exciting.

But I also thought of something far less pleasant than the prospect of new underwear, and that was just how cliché it was for a Yu Yu Hakusho OC to go shopping with Botan and Koenma's supposedly limitless credit card.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Cue the satire! Oh hell yeah! Love the ending to this chapter, personally; what do you think?Poking fun at fanfic staples is always a plus in my book._

_I really didn't want Dani to go shopping with Botan (or anyone, for that matter), but there's a cute moment in there that I kind of needed for later chapters, so... be excited. ^_^_

_I noticed that my author's note for the last chapter got cut off early, so here's basically what I wanted to say: A) I love Kuwabara and he makes me happy. B) Kurama is surprisingly fun to write. I usually dislike dealing with him, but for some reason he's cooperating quite nicely this time around. C) Thanks to the reviewers of chapter 9, and I'm sorry my shout out to you guys got cut short! You guys rock: c00ki3b4ndit, Moldy Strawberry, Dragon Of Twilight, Panda-chan31, Alice, Ookami Aya, VampireOnFire, Cocoasit, Wolf-Cry-Night, DarlingSM, DoilyRox, WorldsAngel, and heve-chan!_

_And, of course, the reviewers of chapter 10 rock just as hard as the 9-ers: Alice, DragonOfTwilight, Delu, DoilyRox, crossyourteez, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, StrawberryxXxKisses, Onfateswings, DarlingSM, heve-chan, and DarkestBefourDawn! You're all saints!_

_Title credits go to the immortal Red Hot Chili Peppers!_


	12. Chapter 12: WTF

Future Talk

Chapter 12:

"WTF"

* * *

Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Kurama left the kitchen for reasons they did not disclose. Yukina and I washed dishes at the sink while Genkai sat at the kitchen table; Botan puttered around the room like a wind-up toy whose mechanisms had been stretched to the breaking point. The silence was filled with the sounds of running water and Botan's moving feet, and then Genkai asked: "Do you really think it's wise for all of you to just leave the temple undefended?"

Botan rolled her eyes. I, on the other hand, suddenly got the vision of a faceless, book-stealing medium swooping out of the sky the second we were gone. This trip didn't seem like such a good idea after all, no matter how good having actual underwear of my own would feel, and I dropped my plate into the soapy water with a 'plop' of displaced suds. They splashed Yukina a little, but she just giggled and wiped herself off with a dish rag.

"Hiei will be here," Botan said, stopping in her tracks to put her hands on the table, "and besides, we'll only be gone for a little while, and it's not like Seishou will know that we're gone in the first place, and Seishou's not in the area so even if he finds out he won't be able to get to the temple in time, and—"

"I get the point," Genkai snapped. "But what if they knew we'd leave to get out little friend some clothing? What if they're using her to lure us away from the temple?"

"Hiei proved that she's not with them when he read her mind!" Botan said heatedly.

"But she wouldn't _have_ to be with them if they're just using her as a distraction." Genkai glanced at me. I hadn't noticed that I had stopped washing the dishes until then. Her eyes held equal parts accusation and... and was that pity? "They abduct a random stranger and wipe her memory, plant her here, and then we feel sympathy for her and stop thinking about the Book as we let our guard down."

"I hate to say it," I said, "but I think she has a point."

Everyone looked at me; Botan's expression said 'Are you crazy?!'

"So maybe this shopping trip just isn't a good idea," I said. "Or, at least, it's not a good idea if we bring so many people with us. Why don't you and I just go by ourselves, Botan-san?" I looked at the ice apparition standing by my side. "You can go too, Yukina-san."

She smiled back but shook her head. "I'm not comfortable in highly populated places," she said. "I get very many stares, and..." She trailed off, expression pained. _If the anime has anything right,_ I thought, _she's probably remembering Tarukane right about now and thinking about getting captured again. Poor girl._

"I'm sorry, Dani, but the other possibility is that Seishou is using you to lure some of us out alone," said Genkai, "so he can pick us off one by one. I can't let you two go alone."

"So this is a no-win situation, then?" I asked.

Genkai took a long sip of her tea and grimaced. "Pretty much." She put her cup down and slid out of her chair. "but I agree that you need clothes of your own if you're going to stay here, so take Kurama with you and leave everyone else behind. He can take care of you two on his own, and with all the others here we can spare him."

The boys chose that moment to return to the kitchen. "What's going on?" Yusuke asked.

"You've been reprieved," Genkai said dryly. "Kurama, you're going with the girls into town. Yusuke, Kuwabara, you're on guard duty. Be grateful."

And amid their cries of joy and relief, I tried not to think about what would happen if we really were attacked by Seishou and his goons.

* * *

We trekked down the temple stairs—at least two hundred or so by my limping count—a few hours later, and when we did we found a cab emblazoned with yellow writing waiting at the bottom. The driver did not look pleased at having to come all the way out to Genkai's place to pick us up, but when Botan waved a fistful of cash in his sweat-streaked face he lightened up considerably (I have no idea where the money came from, by the way; the shinigami had an ATM built into her oar or something, it seemed, and speaking of which, I still had not seen that oar of hers!). Botan sat in the front seat; I sat in the second row with Kurama and avoided his small talk as much as I could.

Genkai's rightly-placed suspicions still hurt.

Tall trees and winding mountain roads streaked along beside us, and I spent most of the drive with my face pressed against the window in awe. I had no names for the foliage streaking by; I'd never been a nature girl, but I could see that they were uncommonly lovely just the same. I had never seen scenery so beautiful before in all my life, and my wonder and gasps of surprise at the nature around us pried more than a few chuckles from my tentative friends. The cab driver kept muttering things about city-folk and tourists, but I just ignored him as we—almost an hour later—neared the outskirts of what appeared to be a medium-sized town. A somewhat threadbare residential section skipped by; kids tossed around a ball in one of the yards, laughing and smiling under a clear blue sky.

"Where are we?" I asked as we pulled into the parking lot of a small shopping mall. Well-groomed trees lined the brick building's exterior and floor-to-ceiling windows gave the structure a sort of moderness that stood at odds with the town's sleepy atmosphere.

"This town is called Sakana," Kurama told me. "A river runs through the southern part of the city. Most people work in the fishing industry."

"The boys all live in a bigger city that's a long way from here," Botan said as she paid the driver and we all scrambled to get out of the car. "The shopping's better, but it's too far for a day trip. You have to take the train and then a bus to get home and we don't have that kind of time."

Expectations are funny things. The mall looked pretty much like an American mall from the outside, and I was expecting the inside to reflect the same mold. It was anything but that, however, and my jaw dropped when we went in the big glass doors. So many shops were crammed inside the building that my skin immediately began to crawl with a touch of claustrophobic panic; the ceiling had been set low to allow the addition of a second floor, and neon signs and flashing lights advertised the items available for purchase in a miasma of loud colors and bright strobe. More people than the empty parking lot hinted at roamed the tile hallways and poured in and out of shops. Most were young people, teenagers more intent on socializing than shopping, and my bum leg got more than a few stares as we walked—well, they walked and I limped—into the depths of mall.

"There's a general store up around this corner," Botan said, leading the way forward with a spring in her step. Crowds parted for her as if she were a queen or something. Kurama hung back with me, giving my slow gait silent support despite his long-legged stride.

"Are you going to be OK?" he asked me when I stumbled over the sandals I had been given. They were much too large despite the adjustable Velcro straps caging the shoes' rubber soles to my feet, as were the shorts that kept threatening to fall down and pool around my ankles.

"I'll be fine. Should get a pair of shoes in my size, though," I said as I hiked up my pants with my free hand.

Kurama smiled. "Be sure to tell Botan. She might not think of it unless you say something. She's like that."

The general store seemed very much like an American Walgreens or CVS: a small food section with mostly canned and boxed goods and candy, makeup galore, a small toy section, and a pharmacy counter. I stood and planned my attack for a few minutes while the boys wandered off; Botan stood next to me, hovering for reasons I didn't really understand. The store's selection wasn't quite as wide as I was used to, but I perused the makeup aisle anyway and selected the five things no girl should be without: a stick of concealer, a tube of mascara, no-sharpening-needed-thank-you eyeliner, tinted lip balm, and a powder compact. Lemon flavored chapstick made its way into my basket as well, as did pairs of fingernail clippers and tweezers and a small metal case containing three coordinated shades of eyeshadow. Shampoo, conditioner, a blow dryer, body butter, face-wash, exfoliant, moisturizer... while I didn't skimp on the amount of items I needed, I _did_ make an effort to hunt for bargains. No matter how much of a cosmo girl I am, the penny pincher in me will always have a say in my purchases.

"I would ask if you needed all of that," Kurama asked in a voice laced with humor, "but after dealing with Botan for so long I feel that asking might get me... well, mangled."

"Listen to your instincts," I said dryly, and when the salesperson announced the price Kurama's eyes narrowed. Botan handed the man Koenma's credit card with a look of triumph, and as we walked out of the store the fox demon said: "I would also ask if you altered the price tags if I hadn't been standing next to you the entire time."

"I just looked for specials. Do people not look for specials in this country?"

He laughed. "Well, yes, but you do it very well for someone your age."

"So specials here are restricted for miserly old men or something?" I asked, teasing him just a little.

"Come on, Dani, it's clothes time now!" Botan said. She dumped all of my shopping bags onto Kurama, shattering his look of poise the way a brick shatters a pane of glass, and then she grabbed my wrist. "This way—there's a store over here with clothes you might like!"

Unfortunately, Botan's idea of 'clothes you might like' did not mesh with my own idea of preferred dress: she seemed to favor frilly boutiques dripping with sequins and pink and ribbons, and the store she dragged me in overflowed with so much lace and frill that I initially mistook the place for a bridal boutique. Botan went nuts over their selection, grabbing tops and skirts off the racks with glee.

"Um, Botan," I began, but she cut me off.

"The dressing rooms are back here—this way, this way!"

And before I knew it she had shoved me inside a small sweet-smelling closet lined with mirrors and was throwing things at me over the short white door. Resigned to playing dress-up with the grim reaper (wow, weird idea) I tugged off the button-up I was wearing and slipped a lacy smock over my head.

"Let me see!" Botan squealed, and with a sigh I took off my shorts and went to meet her. Her bubblegum eyes widened into plate-like proportions before she said: "Dani-san, you look just like a little doll!"

I looked down at my outfit: pale pink fabric hugged my chest and swirled out into a gigantic puff of white and rose-colored fabric around my hips. Coupled with my tiny body, dark hair, and big eyes, I had a feeling that her assessment wasn't far off the mark. "I think I agree," I said slowly. "I'm going to go change."

"What?! At least let the boys see!" she said, but that wasn't possible, was it?

However, the world, as we all know, hates the living shit out of me and will find any way possible to make my life miserable.

"Um, how?" I asked.

"With this!" she cried, and before I could protest she had snapped a picture of me and the horrible dress with her cell phone.

"Don't you DARE send that!" I screeched, lunging for her, but she danced away with a cackle, outpacing my cane in a split second. Soon enough her phone buzzed with a reply, and Botan opened it with a flick of her thumb. I leaned over her shoulder to look.

"What the hell?! You look like a fairy princess!" the message read, and I could picture Yusuke doubling over from laughter. "Where's the magic wand, or did Dani lend it to the tooth fairy?"

_I'll shove it up your ass if you're not careful, idiot,_ I thought, but I was far too mortified to speak. The phone buzzed again and Botan opened the message.

"Yusuke's a jerk; don't listen to him, Dani," it said, but there were a few typos that attested to thumbs twitching from uncontrollable laughter. _Dammit Kuwabara, _I thought.

Kurama 'ahem'ed lightly from behind us and we both jumped. He had, apparently, been reading the messages over my shoulder because he said: "Don't listen to them. I think you look... nice, Dani-san." His lips twitched.

"That pause wasn't very reassuring," I said as I gave him a dead-fish stare.

"Well, it doesn't really suit your personality," he relented, "but the color is flattering."

"I think you're adorable," Botan said as she grabbed another dress off the rack, and she stuffed the cell phone back into her pocket. "Here, Dani-san, let's try this next."

I crossed my arms. "Tell you what. You can pick out _one _thing from this store for me, Botan-san, but after that we're going to go find actual clothing—_practical_ clothing, I mean!" I added when I saw her eyes glitter with mischievous glee. "And no pink, please!"

Her face fell as she put the dress back on the rack, but I ignored her and marched into the dressing room. I knew that, if I let her, I would give in to those pleading eyes—I always had trouble turning people down. The mock felt scratchy against my face as I pulled it off, and then something soft cascaded down from over the door.

"Try this," said a voice that was most assuredly not Botan's.

"Thanks, Kurama-san," I said as I looked over the yellow dress. It was a simple thing, a summer dress with thin spaghetti straps and white lace around the edge of the knee-length skirt. A huge bow on the back made a gesture toward flirtatiousness and youth and a defined bust with scalloped edges provided very cute detailing. I pulled it on, discovered I needed a smaller size, and Kurama provided it for me when I asked. Once properly adjusted I put my hand on the door and paused. "Is Botan wielding the camera out there, or is it safe to come out?" I asked, not wishing to repeat the process of being photographed in the frilly monster of a dress that I had earlier sacrificed myself to.

"She's still perusing the store's selection," he said. _Why did I even ask?_ I thought, remembering all the anime and manga and fan-fiction I had ever subjected myself to.

I opened the door and stepped out. "What do you think?"

He looked me up and down with an appraising eye, and I willed myself not to blush. _Dear God he's handsome,_ I thought as he stared at me, and I tried to appear casual as I took in his long hair and incredible eyes. I noticed, then, that there were many more women in the shop now than when we had entered it, and most of them were staring quite openly at my redheaded friend. "Very good," he said at last, ignoring the women as if none of them were present. "It's much more 'you' than the pink choices."

And speaking of the pink-loving devil (reaper?), Botan appeared as if she had been summoned, arms full of clothing and a smile on her face. "I found more clothes, Dani-san," she said, and then she saw me. Her eyes crinkled happily, mere slits of fuchsia set in creamy skin. "Oh, how cute! Did you pick that out?"

"Kurama-san did," I said.

"You've got great taste for a boy," Botan said as she looked him up and down. His plain white shirt and tailored black pants spoke of simple style, but a style nonetheless (Yusuke and Kuwabara, on the other hand, didn't have much at all by comparison). Botan turned back to me and pulled out her most brilliant smile. "Now, try these on Dani-san!"

"But I was thinking I would get this one," I said, confused as I touched the yellow material of my skirt, and Botan shook a finger at me.

"Now, now, you said that I could pick one dress, Dani-san. _Kurama _picked out the one you're wearing. My choice is still up in the air."

"Oh," I said. "Um, OK." I stared at the pile of baby blue, periwinkle purple, and Easter Egg green resting like a sherbert mountain in her arms. "How many dresses are there?"

"Eighteen!" Botan chirped, and then she shoved me back into the dressing room.

Going over each and every dress would be stupid, because most of them _were _pretty stupid. Most of the outfits were not-pink versions of the first dress I tried on; a few of them looked so ridiculous that even Botan had to suppress a giggle at her own choices, and Kurama laughed out loud on more than one occasion. But it was fun, trying all of them on and parading around like a woodland fairy when the right dress called for it. In the end, though, Botan picked the one dress that was not a pastel color, for which I was grateful: a purple dress that looked and felt as if it was a conglomeration of stitched-together silk scarves in violet and mauve that hugged my body until it hit the floor. The plunging neckline and the silk material made it appear almost formal, and I mentally reserved it for important meetings (not that I had any coming up, but you know what I mean). All went well until I saw the price when the teller rang up the two dresses, and my jaw dropped despite Botan's happy reassurance that spending so much was fine.

"But that's what this credit card is for," she explained as we left the store. "When the economy is especially bad, Koenma will send Spirit World workers down in teams to give it a little boost by shopping. It's not much, but we do out part."

"Bet you love being on that team," I said, grinning to sap the sting from my words. "Sounds pretty self-serving to me."

"Oh, it's just one of the perks of my job, that's all. I deserve a little something for my efforts," she said, giggling. "Now let's go get you some every day clothes. Will you be coming with us, Kurama-san?"

"I actually think I would serve us better by calling a cab." He glanced at his watch, a shiny gold one that looked pricey. "Meet back here in an hour?"

"Sounds good to me," Botan said.

"Will you be fine alone?" he asked, and as I opened my mouth to say that we weren't alone, we had each other, I realized then that he wasn't talking to me at all. I closed my mouth, teeth clicking together with a snap.

"Oh, we'll be fine," Botan said, not getting that Kurama was asking if she'd be OK taking care of me, a possible threat, alone. She grabbed my hand and left the redhead standing in the center of that crowded hallway, but I didn't really care that a dozen women were eying him like a piece of fresh meat and advancing like a pack of starving hyenas. All I could really think about was how, even after everything that had happened, Kurama of all people was still so suspicious of me. He'd been the first to reach out to me, the first to listen, the first to defend me when everyone else wanted my head on a spit...

That was when I started to wonder just why the heck his feelings seemed to matter so damn much, and I felt myself go cold despite the crush of people in the mall.

'WTF' didn't even cover it at that point.

* * *

NOTE:

I have opened a poll concerning pairings. I'll probably keep it up for a week before taking it down, and in a few more chapters take another poll to see how people's opinions have changed over the course of the story. So vote, please, for the pairing you want to see, and suggest people if they're not up there!

Also, the LOVE NEVER DIES soundtrack is out! ACK! JOY! EEEEE!

Title credit goes to OK Go and their song "WTF." It's a great one so check it out if you want something a bit different =] And, um, it was pointed out to me that Hiei has been missing in action as of late, but never fear, the three-eyed-midget is near! In exchange we got a nice Kurama moment—yay!

This chapter was an utter terror to write. I wrote it with Yusuke and Kuwabara tagging along on the trip, but then I looked over the chapter earlier this afternoon to pick out a title and I realized what I made Genkai notice: That leaving the temple unguarded was probably a very bad idea, and that Dani could be bait and all that whatnot. So I had to write the beginning anew and tweak most of the shopping trip to disclude Yusuke and Kuwabara. Complete. Nightmare. But I got it done so here you go =] Also, someone pointed out in my fic "Atsuko"that YYH takes place in the 80s/90s and that cellphones weren't common in those eras. But since this is a mostly AU fic, take the cellphone issue with a grain of salt, please! (*Graph bows deeply*)

Many thanks to my reviewers, all of whom rock like the Flintstones: colbub, Alice, 0nfateswings, Hiei08, Out-of-Control-Authoress, Doily Rox, WorldsAngel, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, rain chant, ShadowFireFox13, xSugarcoatedxStarlightx, Pirazz, crossyourteez, Blooming Summer Snowflake, Panda-chan31, FeatherGirl13, GlassTier, and Darkraigirl!

Yuki-chan:

I feel that the anonymous nature of your reviews speaks less of constructive criticism than you believe it does. Constructive criticism should open pathways for conversation and improvement, not one-sided "I dislike this but I lack tips on how to change it" monologueing. Had you worded said review in a more helpful manner the comment would not have been deleted. Thank you, however, for making an effort to let your opinions be known. Please allow me the luxury of your email address the next time you decide to review. Maybe by asking you questions I will be able to see what I'm doing wrong, since you profess to know so much. Thanks again.

Sincerely:

Graph


	13. Chapter 13: Eyeshine

Future Talk

Chapter 13:

"Eyeshine"

* * *

I bought clothes and I bought shoes; I don't see much reason to dissect every last detail of that mundane activity. Everyone piled into the waiting cab and went home once I was finished. I fell asleep on the ride back, tired and lulled by the bouncing of the car as it drove over winding highways and through shady copses of overhanging trees. The glass felt cool against my forehead as I leaned on the window and drifted into oblivion; I was so tired that I did not notice when the car stopped moving. I jumped a little when someone tapped on the glass from the outside; Botan was peering in at me like a bug in a display case. To my surprise, Yusuke and Kuwabara were there, too; waiting for us to return, I supposed.

"Up the stairs we go," I murmured as I looked at the steps through the window. Their white color disappeared into the coming twilight like dissipating cloud. I opened the door and stepped out. Darkness had begun to fall, painting the sky orange and pink and the trees a shade of almost-black as they swayed in a gentle breeze. I shivered when the wind tugged at my long hair and made it swing against my skin. The boys were pulling bags out of the cab's trunk as Botan and I started up the stairs, and while I did feel a little bad about leaving them behind I was honestly just too tired and emotionally conflicted to really care. We went on in silence for a few minutes, cicadas humming all around us like an angry choir.

"Genkai should have dinner ready for us by the time we get up these stairs," Botan said, not even breathing hard despite the dozens of steps we'd climbed. I, conversely, puffed like an asthmatic smoker. "I hope she's made us something good, don't you, Dani san? All this walking and shopping has made me hungry."

But I wasn't hungry at all: just tired with sore feet and a tensed-up shoulder and a rankled sense of solidarity. "Yeah," I said in English. "Me, too."

"What?"

"Oh, um, I hope so, too."

Botan frowned at me and skipped a few steps ahead, stopping on her stair to turn around and look at me. I couldn't get past her (was too tired to travel in anything other than a straight line, actually) and stopped, too. She bent over from the waist until we were nose to nose.

"You've been acting strange since we got you those dresses," she said, hands on her hips. "Did I say something to upset you?"

_You're not the one who upset me, _I thought, _but I'm not going to tell you that_. "Of course not," I said. "I'm just tired, that's all."

"I'm not entirely sure I believe you," she said.

I forced a smile. "Really, Botan-san, I'm fine."

Those bubblegum eyes stared me down for almost half a minute before she turned around and started to walk again. I could hear the sound of a motor as the car took off behind us, and the boys' voices floated over the cool air and into my ears, slightly muffled by the distance. They laughed at some joke I had not heard, and with a pang—all of my friends thought I was dead; I couldn't share jokes like that with anyone—I moved after the blue haired shinigami.

The irony of that—of how I refused to follow death the first time, and now here I was chasing after its truest form without a care, had gone _shopping _with it for Christ's sake—was not lost on me.

* * *

The boys took my bags to my room while Botan and I helped Yukina set the places for dinner. I picked at my food without much appetite once we sat down to eat, not paying attention to the conversation around me despite my duty to fish for information. Everyone appeared to be in high spirits (I could not fathom quite why), but instead of retreating with them to the large room with the fireplace for more conversation I made an excuse about being tired and went to my room. Yukina, of course, went with me and helped me set up the futon despite my protestations about not needing help, and she turned out the light after I got under the covers and shut the door.

I listened very hard for the sound of a lock hitting a bolt before her feet padded away down the hall, but that sound never came. I waited for ten minutes in the dark before getting up and testing the doorknob. Sure enough, she had left it open.

"You're getting careless, guys," I whispered, remembering how I had been left alone with Botan (however reluctantly; recalling Kurama's face at that moment made my mood sour even further, so I moved on) both in the mall and on the stairs, and now there was _this_ little development. "Or are you just testing me to see how I'll react to this?" I muttered, not liking either prospect one bit. I put my hand on the knob and opened the door a crack, intent on going somewhere in absolute private for the first time in days, but I stopped.

Just where could I even _go_?

"You're all lucky I'm such a good person," I said sarcastically, not dwelling on the pathetic truth as stated above. The door fell shut as I crawled back into bed, and sleep soon covered me like a warm and comforting blanket.

* * *

_Poor child,_ said the Voice. _So alone. So afraid._

Nothingness stretched in all directions, arching over my head and under my feet as if the earth and sky had both been dipped in colorless paint that rendered everything into both dark and light at once.

_I'm not afraid, _I said, but my voice didn't seem to work the way I was used to. I tried to look down but I didn't seem to have a neck, or eyes, for that matter. It was as if my consciousness had been pulled from my body and left suspended in the air of a world made of nothing; I had no form, no shape, no physical essence. But I could see all around me, 360 degrees of awareness that looked everywhere at once, and my voice—if that's what it even was—seemed to have no trouble being heard despite my lack of a mouth or vocal chords.

It occurred to me, as I floated, that not having a body should have frightened me, but then again I'd already been through two so this was kind of an old experience. Been there, done that, as the saying goes.

_Of course you're afraid, _said the Voice, tone resonating with impatience and pity. _And why shouldn't you be, when you look the way you do?_

_What are you saying? _I asked. Nerves made my words tremble, but it was distractingly weird not to feel my stomach churn. I didn't have a torso to house a stomach in.

_You long to fit in, and they hate you because you look the way you do._ It laughed._ I'd hate you, too, if I was them. You're so ugly it's almost laughable._

_I'm not ugly, _I said, and if I'd had a throat it would have swelled with the foreshadowing of tears.

_Of course you are. Look at you._

The 'sky' in front of me cracked, showered with light and dark and shadow as it glazed over and became solid in a wave of color and material that hurt me after looking at a world so pale and so lacking in substance for so long. It reflected everything and nothing, a mirror in a world with nothing to reflect, and as I studied its contours a dark shape blossomed 'below' me and surged upward, and suddenly I had a face and a body because my cheeks were cupped in hands of claws and shadow and cold, cold flesh.

_Look,_ said the Voice as it grabbed my head and swiveled it toward the mirror, which was suddenly a single inch from the tip of my nose._ Look at yourself and tell me that you're not the most hideous creature in existence._

I wanted to deny it: truly, I did. But those Noh mask features, those triple joined legs that bent in the wrong direction, those sightless black eyes and the lipless mouth that concealed rows of jagged, serrated teeth—I was the ugliest, most frightening, most abhorrent creature to ever, ever live, and when I beheld my true face I screamed, the sound ripping from behind those horrible teeth like the sound of gunfire and war drums and dying children.

_Trust in me_, said the Voice, and the shape enveloped me in its cold and shadow, hiding me from the sight of my own reflection. I sobbed in a voice that wasn't mine when relief swept over me; clawed hands that were once cold and domineering stroked my hair just the way my mother always had, warm and soothing and loving and full of peace. _I can give you your old form back, I can give you back your world, whatever you desire. I can make you happy, Danielle, if only you give yourself to me and open me up._

_But I have nothing to give, _I said, confused, and the claws in my hair tightened. I struggled to free myself from the gelatinous shadow, struck all at once by the sheer wrongness of its words, and cold fingers grabbed at me as I burst from its caresses and back into a world of true light and shadows that didn't whisper promises in the dark.

* * *

Waking up from that dream felt like being born yet again, thrust so cruelly into light and and sound that felt at odds with the cocoon of warmth I had been wrapped inside of. I gasped and sat up, wretching as if I wanted to heave out my intestines, but since I hadn't eaten much at dinner all that came up was a drop of bile and saliva that made my mouth and throat burn.

The dark pressed in, lapping at my skin like wolves, and with a shudder I scrambled for the light switch. The bulb's luminescence stung my eyes and made my head spin, but nonetheless I felt much better for it as I sat slumped against the wall, breathing hard and trying not to hyperventilate.

What the hell had_ that _been about?

I realized, as I sat there, that I had been sweating in my sleep, probably out of fear, and I leaned down to sniff at the collar of my damp t-shirt. My nose wrinkled and with a sigh I moved toward the bags with all my shopping in them. The boys had set them in front of the book case and I picked out a pair of underwear, a shirt, and a pair of cotton shorts. I also grabbed a bottle of shampoo and all those other bath time wonders and stuffed it into one of the shopping bags to take with me to the bathroom.

_Of all the nights she left the door unlocked,_ I thought as I walked down the hall, leaning heavily on my red cane, _I'm glad it was this one. _

The bathing room was silent except for the hiss of steam in the pipes hidden within the tile walls. "I wonder what time it is," I said out loud as I walked into the women's bathing area, not liking the oppressive sounds of quiet as I stripped down and set my bath products out in a neat line. "Late, probably. I bet nobody's even awake at this hour."

I sat on a stool and washed my hair, and then I conditioned it for the first time in days. My body reveled in the apple-scented soap as I cleaned the sweat from my limbs, and when I moved over to and consequently sank into the bath's hot liquid I all but melted into a little puddle of Dani-flavored pudding. But despite the pleasure of the hot liquid flowing over my skin, I hurried the bath up and got out as quickly as I could, chills making my hands and knees shake and my lower back tighten until I could hardly move from tension. I toweled dry and put my clothes on and brushed my teeth at one of the showers before loading up my stuff into the plastic bag. Then I booked it out of there, the sibilant hiss of the water making the back of my neck crawl like an army of fire ants.

But I didn't get very far.

"Oof!" I said as I ran into someone and fell backward on my butt. The shock of hitting the tile floor made my spine shudder and twist; my teeth clipped like a pair of pruning shears made of bone. My cane clattered to the ground and rolled away, stopping only when it hit the far wall next to the bathroom door, and when my bag collided with the ground the bottles within it went everywhere with hollow 'thocking' sounds that reverberated off the tile walls.

"Who let you out on your own?" he asked when the bottles stopped rolling.

My heart all but exploded in my chest as I heard that low, gravelly voice ask that very precarious question. Disgust made the words sting my already sensitive nerves. _Oh God, he's gonna kill me, _I thought as I sat there, paralyzed from fright. I tried to only look at his scuffed black boots as I answered: "I couldn't sleep."

I heard him snort in derision and the black boots shifted in their stance. "So you took a bath."

"Yes."

"At _this _hour?"

I finally mustered up the courage to look at him. Eyes like candy glared with so much ferocity that I shivered in sudden fear. Still, words came pouring out like unquenchable rain. "You're taking a bath pretty late, too, so don't criticize me."

Hiei's eyes narrowed as he shot a glance at the towel draped over his arm, slits of angry red set in tan skin that made me shiver. They almost seemed to glow like a wild animal's. "You're not allowed to wander around alone," he said, looming over me like a tower of bad temper. I studied his blue-tipped hair in order to avoid those questing eyes.

"My door got left unlocked." I immediately regretted saying that because it implicated Yukina, but it was too late by then and I shifted my attention back to his face. His lip had curled in frustration, or rage, or some other emotion that I could not glean from his outlandish features. "I was only going to bathe and go back to bed."

"Is that so."

"Yes."

He turned away and walked over to my cane, and then he used the toe of his boot to kick it back in my direction—_too good to pick it up for me or help me to my feet, huh,_ I thought as I gathered up the scattered bottles and then used the cane to regain my footing. The tile felt cold against my skin. _Jerk_. _Where's a gentleman when you need one? _

"Well, don't just stand there," the demon hissed as he opened the door and stepped out into the hallway. Shadows stroked his skin and hair. "I'm taking you back to your room."

"Fine," I said, too tired to put up much of a fight. I could feel the heat of his gaze on my back as he followed me down the hall, and when I opened the door and went into my room and set my bag of clothes and bath products on the floor he hovered just outside the threshold like a vampire who hadn't yet been invited in.

_Now there's a fanfiction plot I haven't heard before, _I thought, and I made sure to suppress the threatening smile. "Turn off the light for me, will you?" I said offhandedly as I pulled the comforter off the futon and sat down with a sigh.

He did not do as I asked and instead leaned against the inside of the door frame and just sat there, affording me a good look at his face and body in profile. He had a button-ish nose and high cheekbones, a strong jaw that looked out of place when paired with his so-huge-they-made-him-look-really-young eyes. He stared straight ahead with a stiff back, legs crossed at the thigh as if he were trying to look more relaxed than his posture telegraphed. Cherry eyes attempted to bore holes in the frame opposite him.

"What?" I asked waspishly after a minute or two of zero communication.

His eyebrow twitched. "You like music."

_What the hell _is_ this?_ I thought. "Did Kuwabara tell you that?" I asked suspiciously. It wasn't like Hiei to care about things and then ask about things as superficial as my one and only (and inconsequential) talent. "Because I don't remember telling or showing anyone else about that."

He rolled his eyes and shot me a sharp glance. "I saw it in your memories, stupid woman."

"Oh." I didn't say anything for a moment, staring down at my hands as I thought about what to say next. "Um, do you mind if I ask why you brought this up?"

He said nothing. I stared at him while he stared at the wall.

"Never mind, then," I grumbled as I looked away at last, and I pulled the comforter over my face as I flopped back down onto my bedding. "Turn off the light now, please."

"I want to hear you play something."

I sat up, hair falling over my face in wet, messy tendrils. I waved a hand at the futon beneath me as I brushed the strands away. "Come again?"

"I want to hear you play something, you stupid woman," he growled, losing patience.

I shook my head. "Sorry, but I'm going to bed. Try again tomorrow, and turn out that light."

The resulting frown could have made a tiger piss itself, but he flipped the light off anyway. "Tonight," he said, body silhouetted in the door frame by the light in the hallway.

"The drum will wake the others up," I protested.

"Then just sing or something; I don't care."

_This is too weird,_ I thought as I reached for the drum sitting on the bottom shelf of the book case. Amazingly, I was able to find it in the dark. "Well, come on in," I grumbled as threw back the comforter and settled the instrument between my knees. I scooted up against the wall for support and leaned my head back against it, breathing deeply to get composed.

Hiei took two steps forward and sat on the floor across from me. He reached out with a hand and slid the door closed, making the darkness complete. "I thought you weren't going to use the drum."

"I might as well if I'm going to sing. They're both pretty loud." I paused. "I'll keep it quiet. Consider this a lullaby, alright?"

"What will you sing?"

I hesitated. What was calm enough for a lullaby but still doable with only a drum, anyway? A few songs came to mind (but none that I thought Hiei would like) so I just began to tap out a light beat in search of an answer. The perfect song emerged not long later.

"This should be sung with a guitar," I warned Hiei as I drummed, wishing I could see his expression, "so I don't quite know how this will turn out. Sorry if I mess up."

He said nothing and did not move, merely another shadow in the pitch.

"Staring out the window of our tour bus, and it's just the horny driver and us..."

Say Anything's "Ahhh... Men" fit the mood like a tailored suit. The song continued on in a calm, simple vein for several verses before the rhythm changed and became more purposeful, questioning, bleak. The beat broke down into sharp, insistent chunks of spoken-on-pitch dialogue that burst out of my mouth like miniature explosions. Before I knew it I was practically using a small sort of scream to emphasize the lyrics, and precisely and accidentally at the song's crescendo I noticed that Hiei's eyes shone slightly in the dark, a glimmer of apple-red light shining like a beacon in a raging sea. He stared at me as I played the song out, and when I fell silent he didn't look away.

"What did those words at the end mean?" he asked, eyes looking both creepy and pretty all at once. "The ones you kept repeating."

I thought about the translation for a second. "Can I lie in your grave," I finally said, and he nodded, a bob of the red telegraphing his movements. "I'll try to translate all of it at some point, if you want, but I'm really too tired to do it tonight."

I only knew he moved because the eyeshine shifted and disappeared. The door opened with a rattle and he left me sitting in the dark without a word, a moving shadow in the gloom whose cloak enveloped him like a stormcloud.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_"But wait," you're asking, "today is Saturday, not Tuesday, so why the hell am I seeing this update thingy in my inbox??? GRAPH, WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING?!"_

_The answer to that is simple, my friends. I'm smoking crack (kidding!) and I'm going out of the country for spring break in six hours and won't be able to update when I normally do. WOO-HOO, COZUMEL, HERE I COME! So please don't panic when I fail to update this Tuesday, March 16th. But there will be a update come the 23rd, so keep that date in mind!_

_Anyway, some of you mentioned that you wanted to see Hiei soon, so here he is in all his grumpy glory. Huzzah!_

_On that note, the pairing poll is still open on my profile!_

_Song credit goes to the band "Eyeshine" for their wonderful name (I'm not too familiar with their music, though... whoops) and to Say Anything for their fantastic song "Ahhh... Men."_

_Shout outs for my reviewers! WickedLovelyDream, 0nfateswings, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Titch-ola^^, DoilyRox, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, crossyourteez, Panda-chan31, ShadowFireFox13, nb, GlassTier, Wolf-Cry-Night, and rain chant! And, Yuki-chan, in answer to your queries: I feel that the anonymous nature of your reviews speaks less of constructive criticism than you do. Constructive criticism should open pathways for conversation and improvement, not one-sided "I dislike this but I won't help you change it" monologueing. Had you worded said reviews in a more helpful manner the comments would not have been deleted. Thank you, however, for making an effort to let your opinions be known, as all input is valuable input. =] Please allow me the luxury of your email address the next time you decide to review. Maybe by asking you questions I will be able to see what I'm doing wrong. Thanks again to everyone who took the time to review! I hope everyone who has spring break this week (or next week or last week or whenever) has a safe trip and parties in a RESPONSIBLE way. Use the buddy system and keep track of your friends so they don't show up on a missing persons list!_

_And because I'm feeling motherly, I'm also going to encourage all of you to take at least one creative writing course during your college, high school, middle school, elementary school, or adult life. Or join a creative writing group; they're all over facebook and are held locally by people just like you. Just get out there and write, people, because there's nothing better YOU can do with your time. Yes, you. This is for YOU, sitting there in that chair. You are now aware that you are uncomfy. GO WRITE and don't be afraid to do it!_


	14. Chapter 14: In A Red Dress and Alone

Future Talk

Chapter 14:

"In A Red Dress & Alone"

* * *

And the next morning: frenzy.

I awoke to the jarring sensation of being shaken. "Hurry and get dressed," Yukina said as my eyes creaked open. Her face came into focus with a painful snap; the light above was shining. "You have to tell everyone goodbye!"

I sat up, stretched my arms high above my head, and yawned. "Goodbye?" I asked, bleary from lack of sleep. Confusion made waking up even harder. "Who left?"

"No one if we hurry," she said as I crawled toward the shopping bags and began to change clothes. "Dani-san, the shirt is backward!"

"Wha... oh." I had indeed put the purple t-shirt on backward; the tag tickled my chin. I pulled my arms back inside the garment and twisted it around, and then I ran my fingers through my hair in an attempt to get it to calm down from its bedheaded state. But Yukina was having none of that; she grabbed me by the wrist and tugged me through narrow halls and past closed doors (I was learning very quickly not to expect many windows in Genkai's austere temple). Soon enough we all but collided with a sliding paper door; Yukina let go of me long enough to throw it open, and we burst onto the porch like a pair of errant fireworks. The huge temple stairs lay just ahead of us over an expanse of lawn and flower beds. The full regiment of spirit detectives plus friends—Genkai, Yusuke, Botan, and even the elusive and confusing Hiei—stood in a semi-circle around the steps. All chatted amicably (excepting Hiei, as should be expected), and I tried not to look at the fire apparition nor the fox demon at his side as I stepped out of the temple's gloom and into the glare of early morning sunlight. Hiei didn't spare me so much as a glance, but Kurama eyed me for a moment before saying something to Hiei in a low voice. I was thoroughly awake at that point.

"Kuwabara-san!" Yukina said, all but flying down the porch stairs and toward the aforementioned detective. "Thank goodness! I was afraid we would be late in all the confusion."

My thoughts as I hopped down the porch steps: Confusion? and What the hell?

"Oh, Yukina-san!" Kuwabara said, face reddening at his lady love's proximity. She didn't touch him, not quite, but her hands did hover over his sleeved arm in a worrying sort of way. "Don't worry, you're fine! We're still here. We can't leave until the relief gets here, anyway."

"Who is late, of course," Genkai, who was standing at the edge of the milling group, grumbled. She turned my way just as I neared her. Rheumy brown eyes looked me up and down with clinical detachment. "Oh, it's you."

I tried not to look peeved. What, she forgot about me? I thought with the mental equivalent of a scowl. But I didn't say anything other than a short and polite. "Yes, it is me."

"And I suppose you'll be wanting to know what we're all standing around here for," she said with a sigh.

"Right again."

She turned to me and put her back to the others, making our conversation practically private. "Well, pay attention so I don't have to repeat myself," she said.

I dipped my head in acknowledgment, glad, at least, for a reason to look at someone besides Kurama or Hiei (I felt awkward around them both—Kurama because I was still smarting over the day before and Hiei because... well, something told me there was more to our meeting the night before than I currently knew). "Yes ma'am."

"Good girl." Her odd hair glittered beneath watery morning sunlight. "Koenma's operatives found Seishou."

My heart fluttered in my chest. "Seishou's the book-stealing medium guy, right?" I asked.

"Correct. He and all his followers are in Demon World, moving deep into the heart of it and away from any Human World access points."

"So is everyone going after him or something?" I said.

"No. A few of Koenma's spirit fighters are tracking him down, keeping him on the run until he settles in a hideout. They plan on trapping him there and taking him out."

"So what is everyone standing around here for?"

She snorted. "Some of us actually have lives, and Spirit World doesn't compensate us for wages lost. Given that we're not under immediate threat, some of us are going home until further notice."

"But wouldn't that leave the Book undefended?"

The question irked her; I could tell from the way her eyes twitched and the furrow between her brows deepened into a ravine, and if looks could wound then I would have been missing an arm. "What, do you think we're stupid?" Genkai snapped, tossing her hair in agitation. Pink sparkled amid the gray. "Koenma is bringing a backup fighter here as we speak."

_That certainly makes Kuwabara's 'relief' remark make sense, _I thought. "Just one?"

"Yes."

Math might not be my strong suit, but the numbers still didn't seem to add up. "But doesn't that seem unwise?" I persisted. "Trading one for a bunch of us?"

She sighed again, anger evaporating into impatient understanding. "Only Kuwabara and Kurama are leaving, dimwit. Didn't you see their bags?"

Well, now that makes sense, I thought, and swallowed. I did not like the feeling of millions of bees buzzing nervously in my esophagus. While it was true that I was not exactly a fan of Kurama's silky way of thinking at that moment, I still didn't like the thought of my two biggest allies in all this mess leaving me to the proverbial wolves (named, in this case, Yusuke, Genkai, and sorta-kinda-maybe Hiei).

Almost as if on cue, I felt eyes on me and the unmistakable sensation of being watched. I shivered. Hiei—who had been standing off to the side like the antisocial jerk that he was—was looking at me. Our eyes met for just a second, but that was all it took to make my ears burn and my eyes drop back down to Genkai's wrinkled face.

She appeared not to have noticed the exchange.

"Kurama has been neglecting his job and Kuwabara's been faking sick from university for over a week." She shook her head and humphed. "They're too old for this kind of work. They should be having families by now, not interdimensional wars."

Her sad expression gave me pause. Genkai, sympathetic? That was certainly new. "I take it you've known everyone here for a long time," I asked, tentative of overstepping a personal boundary by being too inquisitive.

She chuckled, apparently not offended at all. "You could say that. Yusuke's almost a son to me." Her look soured. "A flaky, foul-mouthed, slacker of a son. Makes me wonder why I put up with him."

"Beats me. He and I don't get along."

Another critical look made me quite conscious of my bedraggled hair and precarious position among the detectives. "I could tell," Genkai said, and I felt the urge to change the subject.

"So why only them?" I asked. "Kurama-san and Kuwabara-san, I mean."

It took her a moment to formulate a proper reply, but when she did it made me giggle. "Well, not all of us have lives, I guess," she said with a smirk. "Botan's on loan from the Spirit World until this whole mess is cleaned up—she's our own personal messenger, I guess you could say. And Yukina is living here and getting acclimated to the Human World so she can live on her own one day." Her wrinkles deepened. "That deadbeat Yusuke runs a ramen stand, so opening that back up after a break won't be too hard at all." She stopped talking, lost in an inner world I was not privy to. But there was one member of our little family who she had not covered, and my curiosity was too inflamed to just let him slide.

"And Hiei-san?" I asked, trying to sound casual as I avoided looking at anyone besides Genkai. The fire apparition was talking quietly with Kurama, the pair of them standing a little ways apart from the others.

"A drifter," Genkai said, eyes narrowing. "Why?"

I shrugged. "Just putting all the pieces together." But my traitorous eyes, just then, snuck a glance at him, and a small spike of adrenaline made my heart rate triple when I saw that he was once again looking at me with absolutely expressionless eyes. Kurama, next to him, glanced over at me as well, and my cheeks went red as I dropped my gaze.

Way to go, Dani, I thought. The guy I'm mad at and the one who confuses me are both staring like I'm the star attraction of a freak show. Great. If that isn't a recipe for blushes or awkwardness then I'm a monkey's uncle... although considering the circumstances I shouldn't discount that situation from the get-go, and am I rambling in my head because I'm nervous or because I'm just an idiot?

"So is baby-breath coming or what?" Yusuke suddenly griped in a voice loud enough to wake the dead. I took the opportunity to look at someone who wasn't Kurama or Hiei without seeming to force the interaction, and I felt at ease knowing that the detective had everyone else's attention, too.

"He'll be here as soon as he can, Yusuke," Botan said with a pronounced eye roll. The universe, just then, decided to have timing so perfect it would make Jesus turn green with jealousy, and a blinding flash lit up the entire courtyard. I turned (even though the flash came from behind me it hurt my eyes) and shielded my eyes with my hand so I could see the light's source. The courtyard began to glow pale gold, starting with a small sunburst in the yard's center that radiated outward into a glimmering sheet of liquid light about ten feet tall and eight feet wide. The oval was a portal to somewhere, I assumed, although I had never seen one before so I couldn't tell for sure. The surface of the light stayed still for a minute or so before rippling in the center, and then a hand reached out from its depths. Inch by inch Koenma appeared, looking every inch like a royal prince in his blue robes with red trim.

"One moment, please," he said as his feet touched the ground. He reached a hand back into the portal's glassy surface and yanked, but whatever it was he had grabbed a hold of would not budge. "Oh for the love of..." the prince muttered.

"Bout time you got here," Yusuke grumbled.

"Not now, Yusuke," Koenma barked over his shoulder, a bit of the childish anime prince shining through his adult persona. "I've got him by the arm but he won't go through; says he doesn't like the look of the passageway!" He tugged again without results. "Help me, dammit!"

"Holy..." the detective muttered before he joined Koenma by the portal and sunk his arm up to his elbow in the shining thing. Yusuke fumbled around for a bit before latching onto something and tugging, but nothing came through and his arm stayed submerged.

His eyes narrowed. "I've got ya, so just come on through." Tug tug. Yusuke's eye twitched. "Oh c'mon, you little pansy-ass coward!" he roared, and he sunk into the doorway up to his waist. A lurch or two later he came tumbling out to land on his butt with a smack, and another body fell atop him with an oomph of surprise. This second person fell forward and smacked the crown of his skull against the ground, and then he groaned and sat up. But a smile creased his face a second later, pain not doing a thing to dull his chipper attitude.

A chipper attitude I was oh-so-very-familiar with.

"Ah, that smarts!" said the newcomer with a laugh. He looked down at Yusuke who was trapped beneath his weight and the large duffel bag he had draped across one shoulder. "Yusuke, what are you a-doin' down there?"

"Getting you to come through the freaking portal, you idiot," Yusuke grumbled, and he shoved off the ground with force that sent our backup fighter careening to the earth. But Yusuke wasn't really mad or anything, as evidenced by the huge grin that broke over his face when he offered a helping hand to his friend. "It's good to see you, buddy!"

"I knew you would be a-missin' me," he chortled, pounding Yusuke on the back with a fist. The pair of them exchanged a barrage of mock punches for a minute (really, why do men do that?) before the new fighter turned to look at everyone else. His eyes lit up and his grin got even wider (a feat I didn't think possible) as he counted off each one: "Och, Genkai, Kurama, Hiei, Kuwabara, Botan, Yukina! Haven't seen the lot of you in ages; it's been too long, that it has!"

"That's our backup fighter," Genkai said in a low voice as the newcomer went around to greet everyone in turn.

My mouth—which had been gaping wide without my knowledge—closed with a snap. "Exchanging one redhead for another, I see," I said thickly.

"His name's Jin," said Genkai, and she looked up at me out of the corner of her eye. The windmaster whirled into the air and sat cross-legged just then, and my eyes went buggy at the sight of him floating on a cushion of nothing. "Try to get along."

* * *

So the anime, I felt, was turning out to be a bit of a bitch when it came to honesty, mainly because it wasn't very honest at all.

For the sake of conciseness, let's go over what the anime got right: red hair, blue eyes, a horn, muscles, height, talkative tendencies, and so much cheer your face started to hurt from smiling.

But that's only surface description. A closer analysis will reveal many discrepancies.

First off, the hair. It is not the matte red of a Crayola marker like the anime advertised, nor is it the deep garnet shade of Kurama's. Instead, it is red-gold color that glitters bright in the light and simmers quietly when in shadow. The mane of it is huge, long and wild like it needs a good brushing, but it looks soft to the touch and not matted or tangled. Jin wore it a lot longer than he did in the Dark Tournament; it brushed his shoulder blades, and although the style suited him I couldn't help but notice its similarity to the dreaded mullet hairstyle that characterized the prime of the 80s.

The horn is twisted like a seashell, and its pearly luminescence actually makes it seem a little delicate. However, the tip of the three-inch prong is sharp and glitters like a needle in the sun, and I made a mental note not to get too close to it.

Next come the eyes. Now, the anime shows them as a very bright blue, a royal blue like a crisp uniform shirt. That part they got right, but the episodes never quite got across the way those eyes glitter with engagement and liveliness and a friendly sheen that makes talking to him such a joy. Those eyes are wide and bright and make you want to stare.

As for his build: he was not quite a Kuwabara in height or sheer muscle mass, mind you, but each of his limbs was defined and lean and wiry and the envy of pretty boy models everywhere. Frankly, his body was probably the most good-looking of all the detectives', not that I'd seen very many of them (read: none) sans clothing, however, but still.

And his accent. Oh, Lord, his accent.

Where to begin? Ah, yes, with the anime, of course. In the original Japanese dub he speaks with a Kansai accent, using the colloquialisms of that region as well as the sound of the local voice in very word. In the American dub he speaks like an Irishman. But in truth he speaks... well, _Kansairishman_. The way he stresses the syllables is straight out of the land of leprechauns, but his expressions are all from Kansai. It's the single most confusing thing I've ever heard in my life, and ninety percent of the time I am at a loss when it comes to understanding him.

"And who is this?" he asked when he finally noticed me, blue eyes all a-glimmer with happiness.

"This is Dani-san," Botan said, coming over to put a hand on my shoulder. She shot a sharp look at Koenma. "I thought you were going to fill him in."

"I did on everything but her," the prince responded. He tugged a hand through his hair. "I just figured you'd do it."

The reaper sighed dramatically. "Oh, all right, but wait until we get him settled in his room."

"Dah-nii," Jin said, experimenting with the two syllables as he sat crosslegged in the air. "Daaaah-niiii. Quite the oddball name ya got there, if ya don't mind my sayin'."

"You're pretty odd yourself," I said, eying the empty space beneath him. "A demon, I'm assuming, with powers over... gravity?"

He wagged a finger at me and put his feet on the ground. He wore no shoes, I noticed, only a strip of bandage wrapped around the arches of his feet. Loose white pants and a baggy white shirt that looked a lot like a cut-off t-shirt kept everything but a slice of his well-defined chest and all of his arms from showing. "Sharp but not sharp enough. Wind's me game and nothin' else."

"Oh. Well, I'll be sure to blame you next time my hat gets carried away in a breeze."

He blinked at me a bit before laughing. "Funny girl! Where'd ya come from, anyway? Don't reckon you were at the Three Kings tourney or else I woulda met ya, and I'd remember a pretty wit like that if I met it, that I would."

"I'll explain everything later, Jin," Botan interjected. "Let's take your bag to your room first and get you settled."

"Aye, aye, I suppose we got a while to have us a little story time," he said, nodding with a huge smile in Botan's direction. I liked his smile; his eyes crinkled at the corners and smooshed up into delighted crescents of deep blue.

"And we need to get going if we're to make the train on time," Kurama said, glancing at his watch.

People began to chorus about having a safe trip, and after a tearful goodbye from Kuwabara to Yukina (who looked about as oblivious as an exceptionally pretty potato) we parted ways, Kuwabara and Kurama down the stairs and everyone else back toward the house. I lagged behind everyone, for obvious reasons, and as I mounted the first of the steps leading up to the porch I heard a voice calling my name.

Kurama's voice.

Desperately I looked for the others, but they had all entered the house. Realizing that it was impossible to run, I took a deep breath a turned around with a steeled smile plastered on my face. I jumped a little; Kurama was standing not two feet away, looking up at me with concern. It felt weird to be taller than him.

"Dani-san, can I talk to you?" he asked.

My mouth went dry. I stared down at him without expression.

"Can I talk to you?" he repeated when I didn't answer.

"Oh, um, sure," I said, snapping out of my deer-in-the-headlights moment. "What about, dude?"

"I'm heading home," he said.

"Uh huh." I tried to keep my eyes steady on his face, to not look nervous or like I was about to throw up (and that is not hyperbole).

"And you've been subdued since last night." He attempted a smile that I thoroughly resented. "I'm thinking it was something I said, as I heard from Botan last night that you assured her she was not the one at fault."

He asked after me? I thought. The knowledge almost—almost—made me forgive him for still treating me like an enemy, but then I remembered the way he had looked at me in the mall and my resolve solidified. "What would give you that idea?" I said, keeping my tone frosty as I met his narrowed eyes.

He took a rather deep breath, and I felt satisfied in the knowledge that I had made him at least a little disgruntled. "I will not beat around the bush," he said, sweeping one elegant hand through his rich hair. "That is not in my nature. All I can offer you is an explanation and ask for the same privilege in return."

"An explanation for what?" I asked, still playing it cool.

"You know what."

"I do, do I?"

"Yes. Don't be difficult with me, Dani," he said in a voice that rose barely above a whisper.

The look in his eyes—a glitter of warning and a healthy dash of emerald frustration—snapped me back to reality. This wasn't just some guy I was mad at—this was Kurama, Yoko Kurama, the thief who would as soon look at me as put my head on a pike and feed it to the crows, and judging from his entire demeanor he was losing patience with me. So I shut up. I value my limbs over my pride any day.

"Well?" he asked, (correctly) taking my silence for acquiescence.

"You implied yesterday that I might hurt Botan," I said bluntly, deciding to take his own advice and not beat around the bush. His eyes popped open in surprise. "Everyone had said something like that about me except for you, and you had been nice to me so I guess it kind of hurt. I thought you believed my story." I shrugged as he looked away, green eyes staring down at his feet. "Sorry."

"I didn't mean," he said, and stopped. He sighed and looked up at the sky as if it could tell him what to say. "Oh dear."

"Yup."

He looked at me. "Will an 'I'm sorry' do anything to make you feel better?"

I shrugged again and decided to throw the guy a bone. "Don't worry about it. I'm just stressed. I know you were only thinking of her safety. I probably would have done the same thing if I were you."

"I'm glad you understand." He smiled and I felt my self confidence shrivel up and die a horrible death in the face of her preternaturally pretty... well, face. We looked at one another for a moment that stretched into a minute, sunlight beaming onto his face and making his skin and eyes and hair all glow. I stood in the shade, feeling cold.

Oh I understand all right, I thought. More than you know. And that kills me. If you knew you'd hate me for it, wouldn't you? Betraying your trust is the worst offense of them all.

"Have a good stay at home," I said, turning away from him. But his voice called after me as I went into the house, and I had never felt like more of an evil conniving bitch in my life than in that moment. Wind whistled past my ears, and gooseflesh rose along my neck and arms.

"Take care, Dani-san," Kurama said softly. "I hope you'll show me that dress when I return."

And when I turned around, he was gone.

* * *

NOTE:

All hail long chapters and a return to scheduled updates!

OK, I admit it—I have a soft spot for Jin, so sue me! But you didn't think the 'other' option on the relationship poll was just for show, did you? Oh ho, I hope you didn't…

Lots of freaking dialogue in this chapter, no joke.

The poll is still open, too, but it will be cut off when chapter 15 is posted. On that note: HOLY CRAP, 14 chapters! This is awesome! Thanks for sticking around everyone! =D

I wrote this chapter, thought it got deleted, rewrote it, and then found the first draft. I then spent an hour combining bits and pieces from both drafts because I liked each one so much, only to discover that I used many of the same metaphors and dialogue bits in both drafts—apparently when I have a plan I stick to it, even if my conscious mind doesn't realize it in the first place. So let's thank my subconscious for being a bitch and not reminding me which flash drive I initially saved this chapter on, but being enough of a doll for having a good grasp on all my evil plans.

Title credits go to the band Evans Blue for their song "In A Red Dress and Alone." I figured it fit the ending.

Thanks so much to all of my reviewers old and new (and all appreciated): 0nfateswings, RSXx, Dragon of Twilight, DoilyRox, heve-chan, WickedLovelyDream, crossyourteez, Panda-chan31, mosinger, and Darkraigirl!


	15. Chapter 15: Pretty Noose, She Got Away

Future Talk 

Chapter 15:

"Pretty Noose"

or

"She Got Away"

* * *

Her left eyebrow rose up until it all but collided with her hairline. "Saying a last goodbye?" she asked, tone dry. I sensed amusement lurking beneath her words, however, and I couldn't help but blush. What was she implying?

"Yes," I said.

"You two seem to get along."

"Uh-huh."

"Unlike you and Yusuke. In fact, I'd say you two are friends. Am I wrong?"

_Answer carefully, Dani, _I thought. "You're not wrong, but you might want to ask Kurama._ I_ can never tell what he's thinking."

Genkai's resulting smile made my ears burn. I felt lucky that they were hidden under my tumble of brown hair. "I'll give you an iron if you decide to press that dress before he comes back."

_Holy shit, she heard that._ "Um, thank you." _Please, please let her fall for this blatant subject change. "_Where is everyone?"

The psychic and I were in the kitchen; I had gone there after saying goodbye to Kurama because A) I didn't know where everyone had run off to, and B) that was the only room I knew how to find without Yukina's help. The decision paid off, however, because Genkai was standing at the stove fiddling with a teapot when I entered and sat down at the kitchen table.

"They're showing Jin his room. It's in the same wing as yours and Hiei's."

I blinked at her, caught off guard by that revelation, and I jumped when the teapot began to belch steam and whistle like a rabid freight train. "Hiei's in that wing?" I asked as Genkai poured the dark liquid into her cup. _So that's why he stopped by my room and was going into that bathroom,_ I thought. _It's on the way to his. I wonder which room specifically is his? Does he have a window? I can't imagine Hiei living in a room without a window... actually, I can't imagine Hiei living in a room at all. A tree's more his style, right?_

She pulled out the chair at the head of the table and sat down. "Yes. He likes his privacy... and he had it until you came along."

Genkai and I sat in silence for a moment as I stewed in my own nerves and she sipped her tea. A new thought occurred to me. It went something like this:_ Holy crap, I'm like a fox in a chicken coop... or is Hiei the fox and I'm the chicken? No, wait Kurama's the fox. Ugh, whatever, does my music keep Hiei awake at night? He'll kill me if I've been keeping him awake at night! Holy crap crap CRAP! What do I do?! _

"Do I need to say I'm sorry to him?" I asked, fidgeting. My palms began to sweat so I wiped them on my jeans, and for a second I was distracted by the feeling of the rough denim as it scraped against my fingertips.

Genkai set the tea down and gave me a calculating look. "You ask a lot of questions concerning Hiei, Dani. Why?"

_Because he's a little bit more interesting than I'd like to admit, _I wanted to say, but I didn't. Her eyes bored into me, making me sweat even more. "He's... intimidating," I said at last. "I'm trying to put him into a more understandable context."

She snorted. "Yeah, good luck with that."

I was going to ask what she meant (not that it was too big of a mystery, considering that we were talking about Hiei) but the kitchen door, behind me, opened and cut my reply short. "Good luck with what?"

I jumped at the sound of Yusuke's voice. He and the others walked in and sat down around the table, most of them smiling or talking or at the very least looking less stressed than they had in days. Hiei, surprisingly, came in after them, but he did not sit down and instead chose to lean against the door frame (a lot like the way he had leaned on my door frame the night before, I noticed; was that a habit of his?). Even more surprising was that Koenma was still present. I had expected him to up and run as soon as he had done his part, but there he was, taking a chair across from me and saying things in a quiet voice to Botan. Jin sat next to him, as did the reaper. Yukina and Yusuke sat on either side of me, and I traded a small glance with Yukina. She smiled. I smiled back.

"So someone was a-gonna tell me about this one," Jin said, leveling a finger at me. His duffel bag was gone, presumably left behind in his room.

"Dani," I supplied, dreading a life known as 'this one' by a person who talked every hour of the day. "I'm Dani. Good to meet you."

"And I'm Jin," he proclaimed, jerking a thumb at himself. _Seriously, he must have killer cheek muscles to smile that big for this long, _I thought. "But we've danced this dance before. So what's your story?"

"Well—"

"Let us tell him the official version, please," Koenma interjected. When he saw my stunned expression he dismissed me with a wave of his hand—a hand, I noticed, that was still wrapped tight in clean white cloth. "Your version might be propaganda."

Temper flared. "Propaganda for what, better treatment of immigrants from other dimensions?"

He glared at me. "You know what I mean."

"No, I don't think I do." Jin's head been followed our exchange back and forth like players in a tennis match, but I ignored the funny way his hair flopped around in favor of clenching my hands in my lap and trying to appear calm. "I get killed—killed, as in stabbed by a _knife_—and I wake up naked in the woods and people think I'm some psychotic killer bent on killing everyone!"

"That's a little redundant," said Yusuke.

I ignored him, too, but I filed the comment away under a slot marked 'payback'. "My mind's been read and it shows I'm not from around here, and it even shows that I'm probably not even from this world or something, and I've been cooperative and I'm scared and you're still treating me like a short-fused bomb! You've all been a great help and everything, but all I want to do is go home so you can all put away those little 'Dani is a spy' theories and just leave me be, alright?!"

"I'm not jeopardizing the well-being of the entire world because of your feelings, you selfish brat," Koenma snapped.

"What more do you want from me?" I snapped back. "Another mind-read? Fingerprints? A cavity search? You seem to keep forgetting that you're ignoring the evidence and that _I didn't ask for this and I'm just as confused as you are_!"

Koenma stood up, slamming his palms down on the tabletop as he glared at me with murder written all over his face, but Jin got out of his chair, too, and touched Koenma on the shoulder. His smile had gone from 'jubilant' to 'placating,' and his ability to convey all sorts of emotion through a single facial expression suddenly annoyed me.

"Now, now, let's all get along, fightin' won't get a thing done!" Jin said, laughing a little in an effort to diffuse the tension. The prince sat down after a pause, sufficiently cowed. "And no need to explain the situation or anything, either—Dani covered it in a nutshell, that she did, and I can see both your points of view just as clear as day."

"The shinobi is right," Hiei said, and I turned and looked at him out of the corner of my eye. _Is he taking my side?_ I thought, hopeful. He was standing up, not leaning on anything, and his fists were clenched at his sides. His posture let me know an instant later that something was wrong and that it likely didn't have anything to do with my issues with Koenma. Red eyes looked into the distance as if he wasn't really there, standing behind me in the kitchen like a ghost. "There's no time for fighting. We have a visitor."

You know that moment when somebody says something so unexpected that the air seems to actually freeze around you? This was that moment. All of us stopped breathing, staring at Hiei like he had grown a second head, and then everyone stood up as one. Chairs screamed across the tile, the sound making me jump and the hairs on my neck stand on end. Suspense made the atmosphere snap like a taut rubber band as Yusuke said: "Kurama and Kuwabara?"

Hiei shook his head. "No."

"An enemy?"

"Probably."

"How many of them?"

"Just one."

"Are you sure?" Koenma asked, and I noticed with satisfaction that he had gone quite pale.

Hiei glared at him. "_I _can see," he said, and I couldn't help but stare at the bandage wrapped tight around his forehead. His hair obscured most of it and his attention-catching eyes distracted me from the white cloth, but I found myself looking for the ripple of his third eye beneath the fabric. "They're standing at the top of the steps." His next words held an ominous quality and I could not help but shudder when he said: "They're waiting for us."

"You know," I said, slipping into English for a moment, "I was wondering when the plot would show up."

"What was that, Dani-san?" Yukina asked as she put one of her small hands against my arm.

"Oh... nothing." I smiled at her, feeling my fear abate a bit in the face of humor.

Yusuke pounded a fist into his palm and grinned. "Well, Jin, looks like you and me are gonna get to spar a little earlier than we expected."

"Aye, I'm all for that," the windmaster said, and was it just me or did a light breeze blow through the room as he bounced up and down on his bare heels?

"Can we take a minute to think about this first?" Genkai said. She, unlike the others, had not stood up. Her only reaction to Hiei's news had been when put down her cup of tea. "This could be a trap. Going out there with guns blazing is a one-way ticket to hell."

I was inclined to agree with her. Hiei, however, seemed to hold a different opinion.

"There's no time to dissect this," the fire apparition snarled, calm face cracking. "That's the fox's job and he's long gone."

"But that doesn't mean we should abandon all caution, Hiei," Genkai growled. "We can get along just fine without Kurama."

"They're after the Book," Hiei said. His eyes glittered, with what emotion I could not tell, and his lips curled back over his teeth. I shivered. "We hesitate, we lose." He promptly turned on his heel and walked out the door, cloak floating behind him like a funeral shroud.

"Hey, wait up!" Yusuke called, and he and Jin both scrambled after the fire apparition.

The rest of us—all the non-fighters plus Genkai, who probably wouldn't fight unless it was absolutely necessary, anyway—exchanged looks ranging from frightened (Botan and I) to selflessly concerned (Yukina) to grave and slightly ill (Koenma) to placid (the ever-unflappable Genkai). Genkai broke the uneasy silence first.

"I'm going out there. Can't leave those idiots alone for a minute." She stood and hopped off the chair. "The rest of you, do what you want." Her steps faded down the hall.

"I'm going too!" Botan declared a moment later, and Koenma, beside her, nodded in agreement.

"I'll go wait in my room," I grumbled. Yukina smiled at me (a pitying sort of smile, I might add) and laid a hand on my arm, and then she and I started to leave.

"No."

I turned, surprised, to Koenma. He stood with his fists balled atop the table and he was sucking like a madman on his pacifier. The noise drove me nuts, but I grit my teeth as I looked at him and asked: "Pardon?"

He raised his eyes to mine. "You're right," he said, but only with difficulty. "You didn't ask for this."

I looked at him. He looked at me. "I don't understand," I said, because I really didn't get what he was getting at.

He took a deep, calming breath before exhaling with more force than he really needed to use. "I still don't trust you," he said, "even though I have the proof Hiei gave us that says you mean us no harm. But I can't trust you until I get _more_ proof because I would be irresponsible not to—I'd be allying myself with you instead of the whole world, and I won't do that. But at this time there's no way to get any sort of other proof, not until I find (or don't find) A-me-ri-ka or any mention of your world. So I'm caught in an endless cycle of doubting you, you see, and there isn't a way for me to ever break out of it."

"That doesn't sound like it means anything good for me."

"I know." Puzzlement and frustration made his face grow dark, but then his eyes lit up, a ray of light breaking through a cover of thick clouds.

_Oh great,_ I thought._ An epiphany. Those never mean anything good for fanfiction OCs. _

"Actually, never mind. If our little visitor is indeed one of Seishou's group," Koenma said slowly, "then I think I have a way to resolve this issue once and for all. Because if you're not with them, then I think I'm safe in saying you're our friend." He walked around the table very quickly and grabbed my arm, hauling me out of the chair with a lurch. "An enemy of my enemy and all that. Outside, now."

"I can't walk like this!" I gasped as he dragged me out of the kitchen. He was holding me on my right side, lifting my body by the arm so that my right leg couldn't touch the ground. That, as a result, put all my weight on my left leg, and I stumbled and fell second later. My cane clattered to the ground and rolled away. I pulled my leg to me, moaning as I pulled the loose tennis shoe off of it and tried to massage the pain away.

"Koenma-san, don't do that!" Yukina gasped, floating to my side. She knelt and handed me my cane, and then she shooed my hands away and placed her cool fingers against my foot's twisted skin. A second later the blue light of her power suffused my leg, healing me and quieting the pain. One she was finished she looked up at Koenma, and for the first time I saw in her a little of the ferocity that made Hiei so scary. "Be gentle with her! She is not like you and me!"

"Here, let me help you up," Botan said, extending a hand. I took it, stood up, and then I looked at Koenma. His eyes were locked on my bare foot.

"I didn't know it was that... bad," he said.

"Don't worry about it," I said, not waiting for an apology that would most likely never come from someone as highhanded as the prince, and then I brushed past them all and made my way outside without taking the time to put my shoe back on.

_You want me to go outside, then I will go outside,_ I thought. _But I don't need you, anyway. Just let me do it on my own._

* * *

The others followed close behind me. Hiei, Yusuke, and Jin had left the door leading outside wide open, so I didn't have any trouble leaving the dim indoors behind and going out onto the sunny porch.

I couldn't see much beyond the porch, however, nor could I move very far outside. Why, you ask? Because Jin and Yusuke were standing just outside the door, barring the way with their bodies like breathing walls. I could see Genkai's slippers and ankles in the spaces between their legs.

"Well, go on, say something!" I heard Hiei bark from in front of Yusuke. It sounded like he was at least thirty feet away, probably halfway across the yard toward the stairs. Nobody answered him, however, and I reached out to touch Yusuke on the shoulder. He turned to me with a start, brown eyes jumping all over my face in agitation.

"What are you doing here?" he hissed as I peered around him. I caught a flash of Hiei's black-clad back and the back of Genkai's gray-and-pink hair before the spirit detective moved to block my vision.

"Koenma told me to go outside. He'll be here soon," I said. When Yusuke didn't look convinced I added: "Dude, he's right behind me."

Yusuke hesitated a moment before nodding and moving a half-step aside, allowing me to see beyond him (although I should note that he really only turned his body to the side a bit, not giving me full access or anything). I finally got to see Genkai from behind and Hiei standing, as I had predicted, in the yard, and I was more than a little scared when I saw the sword shining in his hand.

But my gaze, then, couldn't linger on the sword or the way his hair glinted blue in the sun. Our visitor was much too interesting for that.

"Say something, bitch!" Hiei growled again, and the woman's face—a face which had been schooled into a pleasant and placating half-smile—grew slightly more jovial despite the insult.

"I am afraid I cannot speak," she said in a deep, velvety voice, "until your leader arrives. I wish only to address his majesty Koenma, prince of the Spirit World."

"Anything you want to say to him you can say to us," Genkai snapped. "We're not his lackeys, we're his equals, so start talking or get the hell off of my land."

The stranger's smile did not falter as I looked her over. She wore a simple outfit of white cloth—baggy pants and a shirt that hung open at the throat—over her wide hips, tiny waist, and full breasts, and she stood at what was probably seven feet tall, a true amazonian in height. Her pale blue-green skin glittered slightly in the sun, the color complementing her braided mane of pearly white hair in a way so unearthly that I could not help but stare. Wide eyes with irises the color of bluebonnets swirled beneath a delicate brow; a strong jaw brought out the planes of her high cheekbones and proud nose, and her lips—blue lips, but pretty lips despite the color—looked lush and full. My mouth may have dropped open, but I can't be sure.

"She's gorgeous," I whispered to myself, but Jin heard me and looked at me out of the corner of his eye.

"Aye, that she is," he said in an equally low voice, "but underestimatin' one such as she might lose ya a limb or three."

"And I don't have any limbs to spare," I joked wryly. Jin's eyes widened.

"Aye, when did that happen?" he said, looking at my foot and cane as if they were a rare and deadly snakes.

I blinked. "Um, since I was born."

"I didn't notice!" he said, scratching at the back of his neck. His cheeks colored a shade that went very well with his hair. "Call me blind and smack me good, you're a cripple and I didn't even see it!"

"I prefer the term 'handicapped,'" I said, sighing. It was one thing to call myself a cripple; another thing entirely for a stranger to say so (call me a hypocrite but, hey, most would agree that the term is pretty offensive).

"Would you two shut up?" Genkai hissed, and Koenma chose that moment to walk onto the porch, Yukina and Botan in tow. The psychic pointed at the aqua-skinned woman with a scowl. "She's been asking for you, Koenma. Won't talk to us."

"Indeed," said the prince, and he pushed past all of us to stand on the lip of the porch. "Hiei," he said, and the aforementioned apparition turned around to look. They exchanged a long glance, one that I did not see the reason for, and then Hiei's eyes moved to me. I gasped and looked away, and my head itched so I reached up to scratch it. Then I froze.

_Hiei's staring at me and my head itches,_ I thought in English._ He must be poking around in here. _So I thought, in Japanese: _Are you in my mind,_ _Hiei? Hello?_

I received a very intense stare in answer, but then he looked away. The itch, however, stayed in place.

"I am Koenma," Koenma said suddenly, and I tired to ignore the itch as I watched him address our visitor. After all, the itch wasn't probing and pulling out memories left and right: it was only sitting there at the top of my mind, as if Hiei was waiting for something. But what? "You wanted to see me?"

The woman bowed low from the waist with a flourish of her right hand—a hand tipped with needle-sharp claws of porcelain bone. She kept her left arm folded behind her back, and even when she straightened out of her bow she kept it behind her. _A weapon? _I thought with growing worry.

"Greetings, Prince," she said with a smile and a flash of her cerulean eyes. "I come bearing tidings from his holiness, Lord Seishou."

Koenma snorted, his shoulders jumping a touch in humor that wasn't very amusing. "'Lord' Seishou? 'Lord of Thieves,' more like."

No change in her peaceful smile. "Regardless of your opinion of his holiness, I come here as his envoy. My name is Hogosha, and it is a pleasure to meet all of you."

"Yeah, yeah, lady, we get it," Yusuke griped. He hopped off the porch and went to stand at Hiei's side. "You're acting all nice and stuff to get our guard down, but it won't work so go ahead and get to the damn point."

It's hard to describe the resulting change in her facial expression. One second the smile was bland and inviting; the next it was a portrait of madness, lust for blood, and unmentionable hatred, a leer so disturbing I felt the blood drain out of my face. Her eyes blazed with cold blue fire and burned at us, glittering in a way no eyes should.

Those eyes, I was sure, were the eyes of a murderer.

"Shut up," she said, eyes locked on Yusuke. "Shut up you Spirit World _mongrel_."

Yusuke, far from riled up, slapped a fist into his other open palm. Although his back was to me, the set of his shoulders and straight back spoke of confidence. "Why don't you come over here and make me, green girl?"

"You're not worth the effort." And just as quickly as they had first changed, her eyes and mouth went back to normal. She regarded Koenma with a cool smile. "I come with an invitation."

"Hey, don't ignore me!" Yusuke snapped, and when he took a step forward Hiei put out his arm. They glared at one another for a long time before Yusuke backed down.

"I'm not interested," Koenma said.

Hogosha chuckled. "No? You should be. We have something that may interest you."

"Such as?"

She looked flabbergasted. "Why, Lord Seishou, of course!"

"You're a little late," said Koenma. "We have him cornered with his friends in Demon World."

Amusement made her eyes dance. "Do you, now?"

"Yes."

She bowed again. "Then may I be so bold as to ask how I managed to pop up on your doorstep?"

Everyone froze. Hogosha laughed. "Oh, you are too funny! But to answer your unspoken question: yes, I was one of the many who were chased into hiding across Demon World's most treacherous planes by your little friends, Prince, and yet here I am today. No one can contain the Lord if he does not wish to be contained." She lifted her hand and slipped her fingers in between the row of buttons lining the front of her shirt. I tensed—was she about to draw a weapon?

"Hiei, now!" Koenma cried.

Apparently Koenma must have thought so, too, but that didn't really explain how in the next second I found myself flying through the air. Hiei had moved with all the speed of the Flash and grabbed me around the waist; he lifted me in one arm and flew off the porch, and the next thing I knew I was lying face down on the ground with Hiei's knee in the middle of my back, hands folded behind me with his knee braced on my upturned palms, naked sword pressed right to my throat. He grabbed me by the hair and lifted my head up for a better angle on my neck. The wind had been knocked out of me when he slammed me on the pavement, and for a second I choked and struggled as I tried to regain my breath. But his grip tightened on my hair and he yanked viciously at the strands, and I stopped moving from the pain. Tears streamed from my eyes as I attempted to breathe despite his weight on my lungs. Breath rattled in and out of me as I gasped and sobbed for air.

"Stop moving or the girl dies!" Hiei hissed, and Hogosha's brow furrowed.

"Turning on your own? How barbaric. Well, her life is no concern of mine. Go ahead and kill her." She removed her hand from her shirt and I felt the blade bite through the top layer of my skin; blood trickled warmly over my collarbone. _What am I, a hostage?_ I thought to the tickle that was still in my head._ This is insane! Hiei, get off of me! What the hell are you doing?!_

His grip tightened and he pressed down harder with his knee.

But it was for nothing. All Hogosha removed was a simple envelope—cream colored, with a red wax seal—from an interior pocket of her clothing.

"Hiei, stop," Koenma called, and the fire apparition removed the sword and let go of my hair. My neck proved to be too weak to hold up my head, however, and my chin smacked against the ground. I bit my tongue and the salty flavor of blood filled my mouth. Hiei's hand buried deep into my hair so it could press my chin against the courtyard's cobblestones, keeping me pinned tight to the floor.

"You are cordially invited to a party thrown by the magnanimous Lord Seishou," Hogosha said, and she held out the invitation. "Bring as many friends as you like. The Lord will be in attendance. Dress is formal. Refreshment will be provided. You are responsible for your own transportation. Date, time, and address are enclosed. May I consider our meeting a positive RSVP?"

I heard Koenma say: "We'll think about it."

She smiled. "Very good, Prince. I will inform the Lord. Have a pleasant day." She turned to go, angling her body a little toward the stairs.

"Not so fast!" Yusuke roared, and he flew past Hiei and I at a run. Genkai and the others cried out for him to stop, but he paid them no heed as he leaped toward his opponent and pulled his fist back for a punch.

Her response was a curious one. Instead of moving away from him or raising a hand to block his oncoming fist, Hogosha pulled her left hand out from behind her back and snapped her fingers. Yusuke—who was midair since he had been attempting to jump on her or something; I couldn't read him very well—flew backward with a yelp, and his feet skidded against the pavement as he tried to regain traction.

"What the hell was that?" he asked, and a shadow passed over me, obscuring the sunlight for just a second. "Wind power?"

"It's not like any wind I've ever seen," Jin said, alighting on his tiptoes next to the detective. His hair rippled over his shoulders like sunfire.

Hogosha laughed and raised her left hand again, and even in my terribly uncomfortable position on the ground I gasped. _Quit moving, _said a voice in my head, and the dark-sparkle brush of Hiei's consciousness on mine made me shake.

"What the hell's up with that hand?" Yusuke asked, voicing my own question aloud.

What the hell, indeed, and it wasn't just her blue-green skin that raised cause for concern. Each finger on her left hand was twice the length of the fingers on her right, and each and every finger appeared to be... well, hollow. A lattice work of blue membrane let light shine straight through the finger and out the other side, and her palm was as swollen as an apple and shiny like it had been polished. Despite the fingers' apparent fragility, Hogosha was able to bend them with ease and snap them without complaint.

To demonstrate, she snapped her fingers again, and a wall of noise—harsh noise, a discord of musical notes so ferocious it made my head immediately ache—rushed at us. It rocked Hiei where he knelt on my back (I heard him curse above me and a part of me was glad at his discomfort) and it pounded at my face like a physical punch; my nose began to bleed with an odd crunching sound, but luckily I had closed my eyes so they were not damaged. I hated to think of what the blast did to Yusuke and Jin who stood even closer to Hogosha.

The sound dissipated, and with a moan of pain I opened my eyes; they hurt and only widened into the barest of cracks. Yusuke and Jin stood with their arms crossed over their faces; they had weathered the blast instead of running from it, apparently.

"You are right, red headed one," Hogosha joked. "This is not the power of wind, and that was but a taste of my abilities. Allow me to show you one more."

"Not on my watch!" Yusuke growled, and with a flash his hand was up and a sphere of glowing blue light tipped his index finger. "Spirit Gun!" he screamed, and the blast disconnected from him and flew at Hogosha.

She raised her fingers to her lips and blew a breath of gentle air across them. Each glowed a different color in response: pale white, red-gold, yellow-green, violet-blue, and scintillating black starting at the pinky and ending at the thumb. Then she swept the hand at Yusuke as if she were trying to slap him across the face. Screams of music—colored music, music made solid—lashed out in five glowing whips and collided with the Spirit Gun blast. The energies melded into each other, waging a battle for dominance like a vicious neon yin yang before exploding in a shower of sparks.

But Hogosha was not done. She had hardly released her first set of energies when she began to form new ones, and after she blew on her fingers to create the whips she waved her hand in a tight figure-eight formation. The light braided into a wide net that she released right on the heels of her first creation, and it was Jin who saved us from that menace. He threw up his hands and a wall of wind set my hair to flying. The air coalesced in front of Jin and Yusuke like those heatwaves you see dancing over pavement in the summertime, and when the light-net collided with the wall Jin made a sort of shoving motion with his arms and shoulders. The wall rushed forward to meet the music head on, and then it pushed the music upward into the sky. The net soared off, chased by the wind, and the two energies disappeared, power spent.

"Very good," Hogosha said. A moment later she reached into her shirt and pulled out a curved dagger. She whispered over the gleaming metal for a moment, and it began to pulse with a pure white light.

"What now?" Yusuke said, and I could hear the grimace in his voice.

"Brace yourself, laddie," said Jin, and he summoned a vortex around his forearm. Interestingly enough (despite the circumstances) the only reason I could see it was because of the dust swirling alongside the air as well as the light that got distorted by the supersonic wind.

Hogosha turned her back to the detectives (which I thought was a big mistake, but hey, the girl could take care of herself) and made a slicing motion through the air. A line of solid black followed the knife's edge, rending the very fabric of the reality before my eyes, and Hogosha slipped the now-dull knife into her shirt before spearing the rift with her fingers. She pulled it open with a twist of her wrists, and then she tossed us all one last smile over her shoulder.

I thought it was a trick meant to hurt us, not an escape route. So, apparently, did the others, because no one tried to stop her.

"No one can keep Lord Seishou prisoner when he can make knives like these," she said before diving headlong into the chasm and disappearing. "See you at the party!"

"Wait!" Yusuke called as he dashed after her. The rift closed behind her, however, and he stopped short to stare at the bare temple stairs. "Dammit, she got away!" he spat. A bend at the waist later he had snatched something off the ground. "She left this, though."

In his hand was the white envelope.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_Did I go overboard with this? Almost 6,000 words? Is that too long? Should I split it in two? TELL ME, I DEMAND IT! (I'm kiddin', puddin'!) Seriously, though, I felt like chapter 14 was kind of crappy so I went for overkill with this one. Hope you liked it! =]_

_This chapter has two titles. The first title is named for Soundgarden's song of the same name, and I thought it fit the mood of this piece really well. However, I've had this trend for the past 5 chapters or so to actually use the chapter title somewhere within the chapter itself, so I used the second title to stay true to this trend. The second title is Say Anything's song of the same name._

_So I felt like this fic was going nowhere fast (I got a lot of "this feels like exposition" comments on previous chapters, and I agree with them wholeheartedly), so I did a major rearranging of the plot order (like, MAJOR major) and I have found a way to speed things up a bit. This new arrangement also makes something else seem more naturally paced, but I won't be letting you in on that just yet, and as a result I'm actually kind of glad I had to change stuff around. There are still a few chapters before the shit hits the proverbial fan and we get to the real meat of the plot (those are not good metaphors to mix, and I'm sorry), but I'll attempt to make it as enjoyable as possible for you._

_Also, I closed the poll today =[ The current standing is Hiei in first place, Koenma is in second, Kurama in third, and 'Other' (which probably means Jin to the lone reviewer who voted as such) in fourth. OC and Botan have zero votes, which I was kind of expecting._

_And to my wonderful reviewers (some of whom review every chapter when they don't need to which makes me want to hug them and feed them, because in my family feeding someone is an expression of love, don't judge me, that's what we southerners do, OK?!, this is a terrible run-on sentence, please forgive me): DoilyRox, crossyourteez, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, 0nfateswings, Wolf-Cry-Night, WickedLovelyDream, GlassTier, rain chant, .kuro (sorry, Nagashi-chan, I'm too lazy to put in the spaces, ha ha), heve-chan, Tomoshibi-Chan, Panda-chan31, Anon18, and Jade elf!_

_Until next Tuesday, all! I love you each and every one of you!_


	16. Chapter 16: Healing Hurt

Future Talk

Chapter 16:

"Healing Hurt"

* * *

Hiei got off of me a moment later, and with a cough I rolled onto my side and curled my legs up to my chest. Breathing felt wonderful, full, alive, but I choked a little when I accidentally inhaled the blood trickling from my nose. I worked the saliva in my mouth and spat; it came out red and splattered on the pavement with a sickeningly wet sound, but my eyes could barely open wide enough to see. My tongue and my neck both stung, and with a tentative hand I reached up to touch my throat.

My fingers came away bloody.

"Dani-san!"

I rose onto my hands and knees as Yukina approached. She knelt in front of me and cupped her hands around my cheeks, and then she lifted my head so she could see my face. A gasp made her mouth fall open and her eyes grow wide, and then those crimson eyes narrowed. She looked up at Hiei, who was still standing over me, and she glared at him.

"How could you do this, Hiei-san," she whispered. She turned to Yusuke and Jin. Neither one of them would look at her. "She's a human! She doesn't belong on the front lines with you. Look at her!"

"Is it bad?" I murmured, and blood trickled from the corner of my mouth.

"Your nose is broken and both of your eyes were blackened in the blasts," she said after a moment's pause. "Your neck needs mending, too. I can fix all of it but we need to get you inside and clean off the blood before I heal. Otherwise I met set your nose off-center."

"I bit my tongue. It hurts."

"I can help that, too." She looked at Jin and Yusuke. "Can one of you get her cane, please?"

"Aye," said Jin, and he zipped into the air.

Yukina offered me her hands, and I put my weight on them as I stood up. I started to thank her, but my mouth filled with liquid. I spat again, and the glob of saliva and blood arched through the air like a ruby.

It landed right on top of Hiei's boot.

My heart all but stopped. My pain-filled haze, one which had lacked emotion of any kind, vanished. Sweat beaded on my temple and rolled to join the blood on my face.

Hiei.

Memories of my hair being pulled and the sword cutting at my throat made my joints turn to water, and my knees buckled beneath me. My back and hands and neck all ached, and with a shudder I remembered the way the pavement had bitten into me as Hiei applied so much pressure to my spine. "Sorry," I whispered, "I'm so sorry." Fear made thinking difficult.

"I got your cane," Jin said, and I became aware of his presence on my left. I couldn't look at him. "C'mon, girlie, stand up and let's go, ya need to get inside, that ya do." He hooked one arm around my waist and lifted me upright. Someone forced my cane back into my hand, and with both its and Jin's support I let myself be guided indoors.

The next few minutes passed in a colorful blur of sensation and sound. I didn't really think anything, nor did I analyze that much around me.

The taste and smell of blood overrode everything else.

* * *

Shapes blurred around me, but I paid them little mind, intent as I was on Yukina's stiff shoulders leading the way. We passed through hall after hall until the ice apparition opened a sliding door that hid a bathroom I was not familiar with, but I didn't take the time to look it over. Jin carried me over to one of the showers lining the wall and set me down atop a small stool; I nearly overbalanced, though, so he crouched down next to me and kept his arm wrapped tight around my shoulders.

There was a mirror above the shower. I couldn't look away for the longest time, transfixed by my pits-for-eyes and the way my nose looked both squashed and distended all at once. Blood caked my chin and lips, painting me like a zombie fresh from a meal. And I did indeed look like a zombie with my glassy eyes and vacant stare, and the large, weeping cut crossing my neck didn't look like something I should have been able to live through.

"Hold her steady," Yukina said as she moved to my other side. A knife came out of nowhere and she had sliced my new shirt up the front with a single stroke. "The cut on your neck is the biggest issue," she said as she placed her spread-fingered hands across my chest. "Blood loss can be fatal in humans. Kazuma-san taught me that." Her touch felt clammy through the thin layer of blood decorating my skin. "And you've lost much blood, Dani-san."

Blue light turned red to brown, and I felt coolness wash over me. I closed my eyes. A stinging sensation made me shiver, but soon enough the pain vanished. Relief as tangible as the ground beneath me made my head spin, or was that just loss of oxygen?

"But isn't she a demon?" Jin whispered. "Her energy..."

Yukina shushed him.

My eyes opened. Yukina flicked on the shower in front of us and dunked a rag (I suddenly noticed the pile of them lying nearby) in the stream of resulting water; then she brought the rag to my face and began to wipe everything away with gentle strokes. My nose smarted when she got near it, though, and I flinched away.

"Here," Jin said, grabbing another towel and forcing it into my hand. "Clean up your chest. Get your mind off of it." Just as quickly as he had given it he took the towel away and soaked it in the water. "Whoopsies, now you're all set."

"Thank you," I said, but I sounded very nasal and I had to spit again. The ugly fluid circled the drain a few times before disappearing from sight.

"Now hold still," Yukina said, and we both worked on getting me clean. Minutes passed in silence punctuated by the hiss of water on tile.

"I'm sorry," Jin said.

My eyes moved toward him, but I did not turn because it would mess up Yukina. He was looking at me with eyes so big and blue they could have successfully impersonated lakes. "You didn't do anything," I said with as little lip movement as possible.

"Exactly," he said, and his head dipped forward a little. Hair fell into his eyes. "Hiei started talkin' in my head, tellin' me not to get in his way when he went after ya. Told me Konema'd told him to use ya as a hostage, to see if maybe that Hogosha lady knew ya and would back off if ya got roughed up."

"Is that what was going on?" Yukina asked, hands leaving my cheeks. "I wondered why you and Yusuke-san both let Hiei-san do that. Neither of you are prone to treating humans in that manner."

I could hear the distaste in her voice, and guilt—what a horrible time for guilt—made me rush to the fire apparition's defense despite my own feelings. They were siblings and I wasn't going to let her think ill of her own brother. "I don't care," I said, and I had to spit yet again. "It makes sense. I would have done the same thing if I were all of you."

"But you got hurt!"

"Hiei-san was in my head, too," I continued. "I think he was looking for recognition, for memories of Hogosha to pop up. And if I wanted to bet, I would bet that he was in Hogosha's head, too, looking for thoughts of me. He did what he had to to keep everyone here safe. I don't blame him for what he did to me." _I blame Koenma for being a stubborn idiot,_ I thought, but I chose not to say so out loud.

This did not seem to satisfy Yukina, but she did not pursue the matter. "Close your eyes so I can calm the bruising," she said, and I obediently complied. My flesh tingled beneath her fingers as if it had fallen to sleep, and when I opened my eyes I saw in the mirror that the only thing wrong with my face now was the swollen nose. It was obviously crooked, turned farther up at the tip than I was used to seeing, and had been bruised beyond recognition. Frankly, the red and purple mess looked like someone had stapled a radish to the middle of my face.

"Setting the nose will hurt a bit," Yukina said as she reached for me again, but I waved her hands away.

"Let it stay this way," I said.

"But it will be crooked when the swelling—"

"I want to show Koenma what his little scheme did to my face."

"But I can't guarantee that I will be able to fix it if we let it wait," she said, and I weighed the options of a crooked nose and sweet revenge.

Revenge won out with a little help from his friend, shapeshifting. "Call it a battle scar," I said at last, and Yukina blanched. "You can heal my tongue, though, if you want."

Jin let out a low whistle. "He ain't gonna be happy. He's probably feeling guilty already."

Temper flared. "So let him feel that way. Maybe he should."

"But I thought you said you were fine with what had happened," Yukina protested.

I shrugged. "Oh, I am fine. I just don't want Koenma to be." I stuck out my tongue at her, and I think she thought it was a rude gesture before she saw the row of tooth marks welling with blood on the organ's surface. A single glowing fingertip was all it took to heal the gashes. When she was done I stood up, and I immediately regretted it; my head spun and I felt woozy. Jin caught me as I stumbled, and with a moan and let myself fall against his broad chest. He forced my cane into my hand.

"You need to go lie down," I heard Yukina say. "Jin, her room is in the same wing as yours. Do you think you can take her there while I got get her a little food? She needs to eat to replace the blood she lost."

"All righty, we'll get to it," Jin said, and he slipped his arm around my waist again. "Get a move on, Dani-san; rest is what ya need."

And as much as I wanted to march straight to Koenma and show off the nose he'd given me, I just couldn't find the energy to argue. Heedless of the way my shirt was gaping open, exposing my pale pink bra to the entire world, I made my slow way out of the bathroom and into the hallway beyond.

* * *

My room's door was open. No one had put away my futon since I had gotten out of it, so it took little effort to move across the room and collapse bonelessly onto the fluffy object. I lay on my stomach with my head turned to the side, breathing through my mouth (breathing through the nose was impossible at this point) as I tried to force away ugly nausea. Jin sat down on the floor next to me, cross-legged with his chin pillowed on one hand and his blue eyes trained on my face.

"So, you can cry if ya wanna. I don't mind."

That sure cleared the cobwebs from my hazy mental state. "I don't need to cry," I said with a frown. "I just want to punch someone."

"Oh." He paused. "It's just that girls cry a lot when they get hurt. All wailin' and a weepin' about getting' their faces beat up and such."

"Mine's not great to begin with," I said, joking around with him, and he smiled. I noticed that his ears bounced once or twice before he replied.

"Ah, so this nose is an improvement, is it?"

I rolled my eyes. "You think so? I kind of like it."

"Aye, aye, it's fetchin' like a well trained dog." His brow furrowed. "I mean what I said earlier, about bein' sorry. But honestly, I thought ya could take care of yourself." Confusion must have shown on my face, because he was quick to continue. "Your energy, lassie. It ain't too powerful, but it's a demon's."

"I didn't know demon's existed until I... came here," I said. I had been about to drop the word 'die,' but decided against it. "There are only humans where I come from."

"Which is where?"

"America."

He scratched his head. "Never heard of it," he said.

"Neither has Koenma. We think—well, I think—I'm from another world."

His eyes narrowed at me before popping open wide. "Blimey!" he said, and he touched my forehead with a fingertip. "There's a little human junk in there, too, isn't there?"

I crossed my eyes to look at his finger, and he withdrew it with a sheepish grin. "Apparently," I said. "I don't know how to tell."

He processed this for a few moments, but he did not appear to make much headway. "So... what are you, then? Yusuke's a half-breed but he feels either one or the other, never really a mix, unless he's drawin' power from a weird place but that doesn't happen too often. But you're constant. Weird, ain't ya?"

_Ignorance again. Ugh. _"Yusuke's a halfbreed?"

Jin sighed as if he had explained the concept a thousand times. "Well, no. But the demon in him is extra strong, strong enough so that he's like a half-breed."

"Now_ that's_ weird."

"Eh, I suppose."

"I've brought you something," Yukina said from the doorway. I lifted my head from the futon and craned around to look at her. She was carrying a tray laden with a few bowls glasses, but her arms were shaking beneath her aqua kimono sleeves. I smacked Jin's knee as she walked in. "Help her," I hissed, and with a startled look his bolted to his feet and took the tray from her. Then he sat down again and set the tray on the floor beside my bed. Three bowls of rice, a bowl of clear broth, a bowl of miso soup, two plates of fish, two glasses of juice and another smaller glass filled with amber liquid... There was a helluva lot of food.

"Dani-san, you can eat all of this?" Jin asked with obvious envy. He was so childishly cute that I couldn't help but giggle.

"I thought you might be hungry," Yukina said to Jin as she knelt next to the wind master, and his face lit up like a roman candle. "But this," she said, pointing at the clear broth, "and this," she said with another point at the smallest glass, "are for Dani-san." She smiled at me and picked up the tiny cup. "Drink all of this in one gulp, and don't spit it out."

_Medicine, _I thought as I took it from her. _Ugh_. But then I tossed it back (three or so gulps of it before the taste hit me) and swallowed, and I started to cough as the liquid burned every inch of my throat on the way down. Fire spread through my fingers and toes as my lips began to tingle.

"Oh no," I groaned, clutching my head in my hands. The cup fell onto the futon and rolled away, hitting the wood floor with a clack. "Bad idea, Yukina-san."

"What was that stuff?" Jin asked with distorted speech, mouth full of food.

"A bit of Genkai's sake," Yukina said, confusion coloring her voice. "It's supposed to get her blood pumping. But it's not that strong, is it?"

"It is for me. I have about another minute before I become unintelligible," I said, "so listen up. I can't take alcohol very well. I need to sleep it off."

"At least drink your soup first!"

"Uh, no, not gonna happen," I said, and I dove beneath the covers. My vision blurred at the corners and made my periphery spin in circles. "Oh, dammit, this is so not good," I said in English.

"What?" said Jin.

"That's the language they speak in America," Yukina said, and to me it sounded like she was talking under water.

"Is she using it again?" This new voice belonged to Koenma, and I sat up. The room spun, but still I glared at the prince as he hovered in the doorway.

Forgive me if, from this point forward, things seem a little disjointed. I have trouble remembering just what was said and who said it.

"Yes," I slurred in Japanese. "Do you like my nose? It looks like a radish. A big one. I'm a radish-face!"

Koenma's eyes narrowed. "Are you drunk?"

I shook my head. "Maybe." Then I nodded. "Like a fish."

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "And whose bright idea was that?"

"Mine," Yukina said in a small voice.

"Did you use Genkai's sake?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Well, it's more potent than most." He looked back to me. "I just wanted to say that Hiei read both yours and Hogosha's minds during the incident, and that—"

"Even when I'm drunk you're stupid," I said, "because I knooooow that already. Jerk."

He blinked. "Well, yes, um... Hiei registered no recognition between the two of you, and Hogosha possesses no memory gaps. She is also Seishou's right hand, according to our sources, so if she does not know of you then it is highly unlikely that Seishou does, and..." He stopped. "Is any of this getting through to you?"

"Oh, sure," I said, flopping onto my back. "It means that I was right and that you're a stupid baby-head."

"... I see."

"Yup. Aaaand you're dumb." I looked up and smiled. "Kind of cute, though." I turned to Jin and Yukina, the former of whom was grinning like and idiot. "What are you lookin' at, smiley? Didn't anybody ever tell you that gingers don't have souls?"

He poked my cheek and the small force made me rock in place. "You're a funny drunk, that you are."

"Funny schmunny." I grabbed my cane and scooted backward until I leaned on the wall, and with small motions I made to crawl up the vertical service. "Here we goooo, people."

"That's probably not such a good idea in your condition, Dani-san," Yukina protested, coming to stand beside me, but I just laughed and lurched forward. Koenma, however, barred my way so I could not go outside the room.

"Lemme go," I said, wobbling a bit once I had stopped moving. An idea made me grin with a lopsided quirk of the lips. "I need to puke."

He went somewhat pale and quickly moved aside, and I laughed at him. "I'm a liar!" I said, and I began to move down the hallway toward the rest of the temple. Everyone dashed after me, but I think all of my weaving and mumbling and random bouts of laughter might have scared them enough to keep them from touching me.

Let me take a moment to explain what being drunk is like for me. This explanation is rather simple, though, so be grateful that I can pretty much sum the entire experience up in the word "disconnect." It's like I'm watching myself through a telescope; I'm there with the action, but by the time I realize what's happening it's too late to stop it and I'm way too far away to intervene. Of course, I usually come back from being drunk with more than a few stories about my general tomfoolery, so as a result I tend to stay away from alcohol whenever possible.

Hard thing to do when Yukina's slipping me three shot's worth in one glass.

"Dani-san, where are you going?" Yukina asked me, or was that Jin? I'm not really able to remember, but I do know that I mumbled something about wanting to go outside and was somehow, despite all odds, able to make it onto the porch, where I promptly laid down on my back and closed my eyes.

"What is she doin'?" I heard Jin whisper.

"I'm not sure," Koenma said by way of response.

"Why did you let her out of her room?" a new voice said from somewhere above me. I cracked open an eye to find a shadow with bright red eyes regarding me with a cool expression.

"Well, well, well, we meet again," I said, and I sat up. "Can't get away this time, you big jerk."

"She wouldn't stay in," Koenma said, ignoring me completely. "We did not know she would react this badly to alcohol."

"It's my fault," said Yukina. "I gave it to her."

"I don't care whose fault it was," Hiei said, but even drunk I could tell that the phrase didn't sting as much as it could have—_for Yukina's sake_, I thought with a giggle. "Just get her inside... and put a shirt on her."

I looked down at my ragged top and the bra visible beneath it. "Whoops," I said, and I pulled the hanging flaps of purple fabric together. "You're a pervert."

He raised an eyebrow, but I was so fuzzy that I didn't read the quirk at all. I stood up again and staggered toward the door, but I didn't make it and leaned on the temple wall. I shot another look at Hiei and grinned in a fit of wicked (and inebriated) inspiration. "You know, even for a three eyed freak you're pretty hot," I said. The drunk me meant it as a joke to throw Hiei off balance, but it seemed as if everyone took me fairly seriously (if I was interpreting the various gasps and giggles issuing from our audience right, of course).

"Excuse me?" Hiei said, deadpanning.

I chortled. "You heard me, red-eyes. But don't let it go to your head, you _stupid_. Because you're too mean to be nice!"

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Your face doesn't make any sense!" I cackled. "Ha! Zing!"

"Can someone get this stupid woman under control?" he barked, but everyone just stared at him.

"I'm drunk," I said, sliding down the wall. My eyes dropped closed like storm shutters, and no amount of prying could open them again. "Oh hot damn, this is not gooood."

I don't really know who carried me back to bed, but I do remember them making a comment or two about my weight, and when they put me down I made sure to whack them across the face 'on accident' with my leaden arms.

Revenge, indeed.

* * *

"Can you hear me, Dani-san?"

I sat up. Looked around. Didn't recognize much. Rubble surrounded me on all sides, vast expanses of empty space filled with the floating wreckage of crumbled buildings, smashed ships, and burnt-black airplanes. Pale gray light made shadows almost nonexistent. I lay atop a large sheet of concrete with steel wires as thick as my wrists poking out of its crumbled edges, and sitting next to me on the stone slab was the Future Koenma.

"How did I get here?" I asked. My brow furrowed. "And why are you here? And why am I not drunk?"

Eyes of golden brown blinked in surprise. "You were drunk?"

"Yeah."

"That's probably why this is working, then. I've been trying to contact you all week with no success."

"Why?" I asked, wrapping my arms around my torso. It was cold in the void of wreckage, and I was wearing the same thing I had worn back in the hospital—that light kimono of white that felt as airy as cloud. The outfit felt ancient, like I had worn it hundreds of years before, and it was weird to think that my first meeting with Koenma had been less than a week prior. "Have you been watching me? I didn't know you could do that." A feeling of disquiet made my gut roil and churn. Or was that my real body and the alcohol simply making my dream body feel a little funny, too?

"Yes," he said. His hair needed a trim, but I didn't say anything as it fell to brush his jawline. "Tell me your progress."

The roiling increased. "But you just said you had been watching me."

"But I want to hear it from you, Dani-san."

Roiling morphed into full-fledged alarm. "Since when do you call me 'Dani-san'?"

Our eyes met and held each other, and winged creatures fluttered in my throat and mouth. His pupils seemed matte-black in the nonlight as he leaned forward and kissed me on the mouth, lips conforming to mine in a rush of adrenaline and sweetness. I kissed him back, and his hand moved to curl into my hair like talons, and...

I broke away. Looked at him.

"Who are you?" I asked without really knowing why.

But that seemed to be just the right thing to say because his lips curled back over his teeth in a snarl before darkness erupted from the sockets of his eyes and spilled onto my skin. Before the thing that was not Koenma could react, could touch me with hands that had suddenly gone black and twisted, a voice called my name and a warm hand touched my shoulder.

"Wake up, Dani-san!" said the voice, and the hand shook me with firm force. "Wake up, now!"

* * *

_NOTE: _

_I felt that comic relief was in order, so Drunken Dani made an appearance to balance out the somewhat freaky dream sequence._

_I really don't think 6K chapters can be done every single Tuesday, so please be content with 4,500 word installments. 6Ks are just too hard for a poor student like myself!_

_I'm writing a piece about Botan's life, by the way. The first chapter is already up on my profile, so if you like Botan and are curious about my interpretation of her origins then I'd appreciate it if you checked the story out. Thanks!_


	17. Chapter 17: Good OldFashioned Nightmare

Future Talk

Chapter 17:

"Good Old-Fashioned Nightmare "

* * *

I opened my eyes. Panic made the room spin as I surged upward, gasping for air like I had been imprisoned under water. I couldn't breathe out of my nose. It took me a moment to remember what had happened to it the day before.

"You were having a nightmare," Genkai said. She was sitting next to me, Indian style, and she clutched a pipe with an incredibly long stem between her teeth. As she inhaled, the pipe's bowl flamed in the dark, illuminating her face with a brief flash of dull red light. Shadows in her wrinkles made her face appear even more ancient. "Wanna tell me about it?"

My temples ached lightly, but I realized with a surge of joy that I was not in possession of a hangover. The knowledge confused me, however, and I guess Genkai's keen intuition picked up on that despite the way the darkness veiled my expression.

"Yukina removed the alcohol from your system after you went to sleep," the psychic said. "Not all of it, mind, but enough to keep you from dying of headache."

"Thank you."

"Thank her, not me." Silence reigned until she asked again: "Wanna tell me about the nightmare?"

"Not really." The words were out of my mouth before I could judge them. "I mean..."

"What if I told you that I've been having nightmares lately, too?"

Wait, what? What did _that _mean, exactly? I drew in a deep, shaky breath through my mouth."I would tell you that chamomile tea helps you sleep. But you drink a lot of it already, I'm thinking."

"You're a poor liar, Dani." She used no honorific.

"I didn't lie."

"But you did deflect the question. Makes me think you have something to hide." She pulled on the pipe again. For the first time I noticed the fragrant herb smoke spiraling through the air, and I inhaled deep of its scent. Woodsy, light, but also floral. I decided I liked it despite the circumstances and its carcinogenic properties.

"I'm not hiding," I said at last. "I'm just..."

"Scared?" Genkai supplied.

"Kind of, yeah."

"So maybe I can help." Another pull, another flaming glimmer, and her eyes lit up in the dark.

I visualized a set of scales. On one plate I piled the pros (finding answers and maybe a dreamless night) and on the other I piled the cons (saying too much). I decided that the pros won out. "I dreamed of... a loved one," I said, glad she could not see me blush in the dark. I hoped that she did not ask about their identity.

She didn't. "Doesn't sound too bad." I could imagine the way her eyebrows would climb into her gray-pink hair had there been light enough to see them.

"Only it wasn't my loved one. They... kissed me. I realized that they weren't who they said they were soon after."

"So who were they, then?"

That threw me for a loop, but then I remembered my other nightmare. "A few nights ago I had another dream." I paused, unsure of what to say next.

"Go on," Genkai murmured.

My reply came out haltingly. "This... thing, told me I was really, really ugly. Showed me... a version of myself that made me think it was true." I shivered at the memory. "It was horrible, but it offered me... comfort, at the price of... well, it said it would make me less ugly and could take me home if I would 'open up' to it, whatever that meant."

She was silent for a second or two. "And this creature was what took on the form of your loved one?" she asked.

"Correct."

"Why do you think it tried to trick you?"

"I have no idea." But I really did know, and since Genkai had mentioned her own nightmares, too, I decided that keeping information back could do more harm than good. "But it asked me how everything was going here, how I was settling in and what everyone else was doing. To tell it all about everyone. I didn't, but..." Here's where I really went out on a limb and aimed for a hot spot. "It was just so curious, I think it may have been after that book everyone keeps making such a big deal over." I heard Genkai's sharp intake of breath before I saw the pipe glow again. "Do you feel that way, too?" I pressed. "Like, maybe it posed as a loved one to find out what's going on? And in the first dream it tried to get on my good side and bargain with me. That just doesn't feel like coincidence, Genkai-san!"

"I'm inclined to agree."

Surprise nearly made me gasp. "Did a loved one visit you, too?" I asked.

She didn't say anything for a long time, and I did not think she was going to answer me at all until she finally said: "You could say that." I would have fished for more if she had not decided to stand up. "I'll be going now. Try to remember as much as you can. I may need to talk to you again."

She was gone in a moment, the light from the pipe tracing her movement across my room and into the hallway beyond.

It did not occur to me until a long time later how strange it was that she knew exactly when to wake me.

* * *

"Come on, Dani-san, I'll get you some tea," Yukina wheedled.

I poked a hand out from inside my cocoon of blankets and made a thumbs-down sign. I heard her sigh and felt her kneel next to me.

"It will help the hangover," she said.

But I didn't have a hangover, not even the paltry headache from the night before, and that worried me almost as much as the dream did. Still, I allowed myself to be pried from my bed, dressed (in shorts, a t-shirt, and sandals), and led into the kitchen like an obedient little invalid, but before I entered the sun-filled room I halted on the threshold. Three pairs of eyes regarded me with interest.

My throat tightened. "I am issuing an apology to anyone I offended, hit on, or hurt while I was intoxicated. It was probably an accident and I didn't mean anything by it. I also don't remember much, so jokes will not be appreciated." That said, I sat down in my usual place at the kitchen table and stared down at the hands folded neatly on my lap.

"You told Hiei he was hot," Yusuke said in a derisive voice, wasting no time starting in on the insulting fun.

"And that's why I apologized to the people I hit on," I said as Yukina set a plate in front of me. I tried not to look at the spirit detective as I shoveled rice into my mouth.

"You hit on_ me _pretty bad last night, that you did," said Jin, leaning across the table to look at me with pleading eyes. I froze, unable to recall what I said or even when I had the opportunity to say it, and then he laughed. "Aye, you smacked me real good when I put you in your bed. Little you may be, but you pack a fair-sized wallop!"

"Too bad her arm's not as big as her mouth," Yusuke said, sneering at me. There was humor in his look, too, although the animosity all but overrode it. "Maybe then you could actually steal the Book like you want!"

"Or maybe I could shut_ your_ big mouth for good," I replied. "Speaking of which, is Botan-san here?" The comment got a loud chuckle from both Jin and Yusuke, but Genkai merely glared from her spot at the head of the table.

"Enough, all of you," she snapped. She turned a baleful eye on me. "Finish your breakfast and come with me. You and I have business."

"You tell her, grandma!" Yusuke chortled.

I swallowed, and not because of a mouthful of food. "Um, yes ma'am," I said. Genkai then stood up, and I swallowed three hurried mouthfuls of rice before she could tell me to scram. The psychic was having none of that, however, and grabbed me by the back of my t-shirt and hauled me after her, much to Yusuke's amusement.

"Where are we going?" I asked as we went into the hall. My cane clacked hollowly on the wooden floor.

"To the road."

"You mean I have to walk down all those stairs?" I moaned as we crossed the porch and descended into the courtyard. I was of the opinion that it was way too early in the morning for such a long walk, but I had no intention of fighting Genkai over it... well, not too hard, anyway.

"Yes," said Genkai as we walked toward them. Then she frowned. "Never mind, actually."

I was about to ask why she had the sudden (albeit considerate) change of heart when I heard the sound of feet on the steps. I froze, not knowing what to expect and looking for the worst, when a short boy of about twelve bounced into view. He wore a baseball cap that was too big for him above a jersey and jeans; his hair color was hidden by the hat and the tone of his skin was unintelligible thanks to the layer of grime coating him head to toe. A backpack almost as big as he was made him stoop at the shoulders. Still, his snaggletoothed grin and wide, glimmering brown eyes were cuter than buttons, and I watched with interest as he skipped over to Genkai without an ounce of hesitation.

"Hey, grandma!" he said. "Mister Yamata said to tell you thanks for the business!"

"Still couldn't get the others to come up here, eh Kenichi?" she said, eyes twinkling in a way I had never witnessed.

"They're all just scaredy-cats, grandma," he said, sounding apologetic. "They dunno how nice it is up here, or how nice you are, even if you can be a little scary sometimes. And they've never had a cup of your tea." So the neighborhood kids were scared of Genkai, were they? Interesting. "The ghosts've got 'em scared the most, though."

_Ghosts? Wait, what?_

"See any lately?" Genkai asked.

"Nah, it's been quiet since last time," the boy said with a shrug. "But I'll let you know if I catch any!"

"You do that."

_Catch ghosts? _I thought. _Weird_.

At that point, Kenichi slung his backpack onto the ground and knelt beside it. "Mister Yamata said to tell you that you were lucky he had this in stock, and that it's a good piece." From the bag he pulled a cardboard box tied with string. "Ta-da! Whaddaya want it for, anyway?"

Her eyes flickered toward me. "Kenichi, this is Dani. She'll be living with me for the next month, so get used to seeing her around."

"Nice to meet you," I said, and I smiled.

He studied me with a critical eye. "Doesn't look so strong to me," he said.

"She's not a fighter."

"Oh. Well, is this for her?"

"Yes. It's to help her with meditation."

_Meditation? What? _The word 'what' was fast becoming number one on the 'Things Dani Says A Lot' list.

"Oh." He stuck the box out toward me, and I took it awkwardly in one arm. His eyes widened as he looked down at my feet, clad as they were in only sandals. My twisted toes seemed gray in the bright sunlight. "Oh, um..."

"Thanks," I said to diffuse his apprehension, and he at last graced me with a smile. Then his eyes lit up and he looked once more to Genkai.

"Say, is Yusuke here?"

"In the kitchen."

"Can I see 'im?"

"If you want," said Genkai, and with a whoop of joy the kid ran off into the house.

"He can see ghosts?" I asked when he was gone.

"And sprites, and demons." She paused. "Natural talent for actually catching ghosts in webs made from his spirit energy. It's rare, although not unheard of since exorcists can use that technique with instruction. Still, inborn talent shouldn't be wasted. I've been teaching him to use his powers. If everything goes as planned, he'll be Yusuke's successor." Her smile was as fresh as spring rain and just as unexpected. "Reminds me of Yusuke when he was younger, the dimwit. Always ready to go. Now, about that box..."

Curiosity didn't want me to wait very long. "Should I open it here?" I asked, not wanting to drag out any undue suspense.

"I don't care."

"I'll open it here, then," I said, and I set the box on the ground before joining it. _What could it be?_ I wondered as I settled down on the courtyard brick. _It's small-ish, only the length on my calf, so it probably isn't a sword or something, no worries about fighting Yusuke..._ The string fell away beneath my fingertips, and when the box popped open I had to dig through piles of pink packing peanuts before I found the object within. The smooth wood of the neck felt cool on the heated skin of my hands, and with a little jostling I pulled it from its prison.

"Hiei mentioned that you concentrate the best when you have music around," she said as I caressed the ukelele's strings with tentative hands. The dark wood glowed in the sunshine, lustrous and firm. Awe for the well-crafted instrument made me slow to understand what she was saying. "Can you play that?"

"With pleasure," I said, smiling, and I experimented with a few chords as I tuned the instrument. The tinny melody thrummed through the air like a hummingbird.

"Good, because you'll be doing it a lot. I want to teach you to meditate."

I looked up at her and stopped playing, mid-chord. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why do you want me to meditate? What will that do?"

She shrugged. "It will keep the dream-creature out and teach you to harness your demon energy."

It took a moment for that to sink in. "But I'm not a demon!" I protested.

"Maybe not, but you still have demonic energy coursing through you," she said. "You can't explain it, but that doesn't mean you can't use it, either." She frowned. "Well, sing something," she said. "I didn't get you that for nothing."

I blinked. "Wait, right now?"

"No time like the present."

I let my fingers trail across the strings. What was playable on the ukelele on short notice, anyway? The answer hit me a second later.

_Duh,_ I thought as I strummed out the first chords. "Some, where, over the rainbow," I sang, and I let the simple joy of the simple song wash over me. _Bless you, Bob Marley, for covering this,_ I thought as I sang through the verses, and I felt very proud when I noticed that Genkai had closed her eyes to listen despite my nasal rendition of the peaceful song (not breathing through the nose isn't flattering on a singer, let me tell ya). Wind passed through her hair and made the ends sway with gentle motion, and I let the high note at the end of the song waver a bit, holding it out, showing off a little. Silence followed the song's conclusion.

"Can't you sing something in Japanese?" Genkai griped. My jaw dropped. "Well, can't you?"

"Well... I know a few songs," I said eventually, stinging over the lack of ego-stroking.

"So sing 'em."

I let my fingers glide over the ukelele's neck for a moment before pulling out one of the few Japanese pieces in my repertoire: a tried and true Utada Hikaru favorite, 'Sakura Drops.' It took me a few tries to figure out how to work the heavily mixed song out on the small ukelele, but Genkai didn't seem to mind too much. _Nothing like lost love early in the morning,_ I thought as I sang the heart-wrenching lyrics. I let my eyes drift shut, feeling the sun on my skin as I played. _I missed playing more than I realized,_ I thought as the notes sprang forth. My fingertips smarted a bit from the rough glide of the strings. _I need to build up callouses on this body. _I had not noticed, until then, the lack of callouses on my fingers, and I chalked that up to my new form's untested state.

"I told you she could play."

I opened my eyes to the sight of Hiei standing at Genkai's elbow, staring at me. His eyes narrowed when the music tapered off.

"Keep going," he said, and I did until the song ended. It was only afterward that I realized just how quickly I had obeyed him, and the thought made my blood all but boil.

"So when will this meditation thing start?" I asked Genkai, pointedly ignoring the fire demon. My nose seemed to smart more when I looked at him.

She turned, inexplicably, to Hiei. "Today sound good?"

He nodded, eyes ghosting toward me for a second before returning to Genkai's face. "I'll be around," he said, and then he was gone. It was as if he had never been.

"Fast," I couldn't help but whisper. Then I shook my head to clear the cobwebs. "Wait, why did you ask _him_? Aren't _you _going to be my teacher?"

"I'll be teaching you meditation," Genkai said. "Hiei's in charge of mental blocks." Her smile did little to reassure me. "Better get used to him."

* * *

But I didn't have to get used to Hiei right away. First I had to deal with Genkai, and let me be the first to say that the anime got her training methods quite right. No, I didn't have to sleep on beds of nails or balance atop a spike on my index finger, but she did make me sit on a rock with her in the middle of the forest after hiking for almost an hour. Tall aspen trees surrounded a clearing filled with lush grass, and the boulder she chose as our resting place (shaped like a bean-bag chair with a mostly flat top and curved sides) lurked near the treeline. Sunlight streamed down through the canopy of leaves overhead, painting my skin with light and shadow.

"Get comfortable," she said as she jumped atop the rock with fluid grace. I, on the other hand, collapsed across it, out of breath from all the walking we had done to get there. "Don't lay down," Genkai snapped when she saw my posture, so I sighed and clambered up the rock. My feet dangled over its edge, and I enjoyed the lack of pressure on my left leg.

"I'd ask you to take the lotus position," Genkai said, sitting with her legs folded in that funny way you see so often in yoga classes, "but you don't look capable of that."

"Can't I just sit like this?" I asked, swinging my legs around above the grass.

"No. Try the lotus form as much as you can."

I sighed again but I did not argue. Scooting backward until Genkai was about two feet away from me on my right side, I sat Indian-style and folded my hands in my lap, which seemed to pass muster since she nodded at me and did not frown.

"Now set the ukelele beside you, but not close enough to touch," she said.

I took the instrument out of my backpack (graciously lent to me by Genkai, although I have no idea why she had it or had use for it) and placed it between us. The backpack I tossed off the rock; it landed with a thwump on the ground.

"Very good," said Genkai. She had her hands folded near her lap too, I noticed, but in a very deliberate kind of way. Her fingers curled into her palms, and the middle digits on both her left and right hands pressed tight together. Her thumbs, above the fingers, were also touching at the tips, and the entire formation made a shape not unlike a heart. Elbows she kept tucked tight into her sides, pressed just underneath her lowest set of ribs, and the hands hovered just over her diaphragm.

"Hands like this, elbows pulled in tight," she said, and I copied her after a moment of experimental fumbling. "Don't let the hands drop, but don't think too hard about keeping them up, either."

"Alright."

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, presumably to let me get used to the feeling of this pose. I stared at the world around me, drinking in the gorgeous clearing and the blue sky above. Clouds floated like sentient cotton balls; I spotted one that looked like a dog, and another that looked like a twisted and skinny Santa Clause.

"Meditation is about relaxation," Genkai said at last. "It's not something you can force or influence. You either do it or you don't, and no one can teach you how. It's about clearing your mind in order to find the voice within yourself, because it's a quiet voice that can't be heard over the sound of your own thoughts."

I said nothing. It didn't feel like an appropriate time to talk.

"The brain functions using waves," she went on, and the sudden jump from the spiritual to the scientific made me start. "When you're awake you have alpha and beta waves. Sleeping, you have delta. But theta waves are for the in-between state, the place you go when you stare into space and don't think anything at all. You can't force theta waves, and it's incredibly difficult to go into them when you're trying to let them find you. Meditation is simply a way to access the theta wave stage without slipping into delta. In theta, you can connect things your conscious mind cannot because your subconscious can rise to the surface and almost directly interact with your thoughts." Her eyes were closed, voice hypnotic. "The difference between staring into space and meditating is a pronounced one, however. Theta in meditation is a controlled experience, not a random one. Your spiritual power also flows freely in theta state. Sit still, clear your head, and just _be._"

I could tell when she slipped into theta a moment later. It was almost as if she vanished into the stillness, disappeared into the lack of motion as her own energy flowed out in a vast spiral. Was it just my imagination, or did the air around her appear to shimmer and wave, as if her own presence was moving all on its own and—

I jumped when her eyes opened.

"Try it on your own," she said. "Don't be discouraged if it doesn't come too easily."

And so I tried. I closed my eyes, breathed in a steady rhythm, and relaxed.

Thirty seconds later, however, my right foot fell asleep.

"Ignore the physical," Genkai snapped when I shifted to let blood flow back into my limb. "That's why I told you to get comfortable."

My brow furrowed as I closed my eyes and tried to relax. But about five agonizing minutes of utter quiet passed, and my arms—held to my sides the way Genkai showed me—began to ache and drift downward, pulled inexorably to the ground by gravity and my own lack of muscle mass. I couldn't help the instinctive spasm meant to relieve my tingling muscles as my fingers twitched and writhed, eager to move. It was just so hard to enter theta state on purpose, to just let go and—

"You're trying too hard," Genkai said after my third failed attempt.

"Sorry." My reply sounded curt even to my own ears.

"Try it again."

We tried for upwards of an hour before she rested her hand on my arm and shook her head from side to side. My legs ached, my mind was in tatters, my back and butt hurt from my constricted position. The sun shone bright overhead and made my eyes—which had been clenched so tight they had stung—water like a raincloud. Frustration made me jumpy, and I flinched.

"I was afraid of this," she said. "You can't relax. Not everyone is cut out for deep meditation." Her dismissal of my abilities stung. "Pick up the ukelele."

I did as instructed with relief.

"Play a song, or just let music flow. The song should be one you don't have to think about to play. Make your movements automatic and instinctual."

I used my thumb to stroke the strings, and I took a few deep breaths before closing my eyes and mulling over what song to play. I didn't know anything too well on the ukelele, so it would have to be a simple song, preferably something acoustic that wouldn't take much effort to translate onto the ukelele's small range...

"I'm growing older," Genkai snapped, and that's when it hit me. "Goodbye, Young Tutor, You've Outgrown Me" by Say Anything—of course! The song flowed from my fingers a second later, and I ached to sing the poignant lyrics but held myself back, focusing on the sheer act of making music from a chunk of wood and some wire. It was easy to slip beneath the spell of the notes and rhythm, to drift away on a current of tone and inflection and deliberate motion. It took a few rounds of the song before the movement became automatic, but when it did I allowed myself to let go and just feel. The sunlight behind my eyelids dimmed, the wind on my skin fell away, the stone beneath me ceased to press and prod...

"Try to feel the way your energy flows in your body as you meditate."

I jumped, frightened out of my trance for a second before I remembered that Genkai was with me.

"Well, go on," she urged, and I began to play again. Falling beneath the current did not happen immediately, but when it did I tried to swim far enough up to the surface to feel...

And there it was: energy that was as undoubtedly mine as my own two hands, glowing warm within me. I touched it with my mind and let the surge wash over me, coating my entire being in its light and whisper-soft essence. Was it my new demonic influences that allowed me to tap into this until-now-hidden portion of myself? I didn't see how I could have ever missed it before then.

It was just so _bright_.

Then Genkai's voice cut through the light, but her voice did not shatter it as it had the first time she spoke. Instead, the light seemed to part around her voice like a curtain, taking her in and assimilating it into my experience. "Take that energy and expand it," she said, and I spread the energy out and away from me with a gentle push of my will. I actually _saw_ the energy move because my eyes opened as it spread. Pale white-gold, like newly opened flower petals, flowed across the boulder and then over Genkai herself, and when it did I saw, like a shot going off, the pale blue of her own aura. It pulsed around her body, a cloak of light caressing her skin and hair, and when my energy touched the grass and trees around the boulder I could see their own flickers of green and growing life force. I held my veil of power over the surrounding area in a circle about five feet in diameter before the effort began to hurt, actually_ hurt_, and my spirit quavered the way my muscles did after too much exercise. Sweat beaded on my brow, and I could suddenly feel my body again, and—

My meditative state totally broke a moment later, my energy dissipating into the air like sun-warmed fog. I was suddenly tired, so tired. The ukelele dropped to my lap and my breathing became shallow, quick, labored. I felt drained, incapable of thought or motion.

"Sloppy exit," Genkai remarked. "It's obvious you're an amateur. You're supposed to pull your spirit energy back into yourself, not just let it go."

"That might have been a good thing to know before I actually pulled it out of my body," I wheezed, hunching over from the waist. My forehead collided with my calves and stayed there, too fatigued to move. "I'm exhausted now."

"You wouldn't be had you not wasted all your energy like that."

"Noted."

"With practice, your stamina will grow," Genkai said, "and your range will increase. You'll be able to sense things at farther distances, touch more of the world at will. But I'm afraid your energy doesn't seem like the fighting type. It's very introverted, not like mine or Yusuke's. Healing or foresight might be more your calling."

_Or shapeshifting_, I thought, but I did not say as much aloud.

"Well, try it again," Genkai said. "Hold it out of your body for as long as you can, and then reign it back in."

I raised my head to look at her, eyes wide. "Can't I rest a while first?"

"No. Now do it."

So I took up the ukelele with fingers made of lead and began to strum, weakly, and I attempted to zone. It did not come easily, let me tell ya, and after ten minutes of agonizing internal struggle Genkai snorted.

"You're much weaker than I expected," she said, and I stopped playing.

"I've never done this before," I said, trying not to be offended.

"Still, you're weak." She stood up. "Stay here and try to meditate. I don't care if you use the ukelele or not."

"Where are you going?"

"Does it matter?" She glared at me, not that I could see the reason why. "Just close your eyes and try to practice."

I did as she said, opting not to use my instrument, but for the longest time I didn't hear her move. Wind whistled through the trees and set my hair to tossing over my shoulders; the strands glided across my neck, making me shiver. When dots of static color began to dance in the dark behind my eyes and I still hadn't heard her leave, I let my eyes open.

And when I looked around, eyes smarting in the sunlight, I found myself alone.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_So I was thinking that this chapter was going to be a lot shorter, and just look at it: over 5,200 words without including this note._

_This chapter was heavy on Genkai, it seems. Next chapter we get a big dose of, you guessed it, Hiei!_

_This chapter also went in a direction I did not have planned. I blame it on the fact that we had a hypnotist visit my school last week, and he taught us about theta brainwaves and such. So I did a little research and fleshed out Dani's training with Genkai. It was actually pretty neat. Don't worry, though—she only gets taught a little, so she won't turn into some superpower or whatever._

_So now we're gonna waste a little time on training and various character interactions. It'll be fun, but there's still some space between now and the meat of the plot, AKA the party Seishou has invited the gang to attend. Don't worry, though, I'll keep the ball rolling in the meantime. =]_

_WerewolvesMoon, Reclun, RSXx, StrawberryxXxKisses, heve-chan, WickedLovelyDream, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, DoilyRox, 0nfateswings, rain chant, 9shadowcat9, Anon18, Pirazz, crossyourteez, DarlingSM, Wolf-Cry-Night, Royal B A N D A I D, and ShadowFireFox13 are all SUPER COOL FOR REVIEWING LAST WEEK'S CHAPTER! I love each and every one of you!_


	18. Chapter 18: Wish You Were Here

Future Talk

Chapter 18:

"Wish You Were Here"

* * *

Being alone isn't so much a bodily condition as it is a state of mind. If you're alone but in possession of a means of entertainment, the prospect of being by yourself can be nigh enjoyable. Downtime to myself? Maybe a nap? Hah, sweet! But if you suddenly find yourself alone and confused, without any idea of where you might be and lacking something productive to do, it can be a scary experience.

My experience, as you may expect, fell on the scary side of the tracks.

"Um, Genkai?" I called when I realized that she was nowhere in sight. "Am I just supposed to stay here?"

No response other than the wind whistling through the trees.

I jumped off the rock and landed on my good foot, and then I grabbed my cane and leaned on it. _I'm lucky I put of tennis shoes before we left the temple,_ I thought as I walked through the clearing's tall grass and toward the other side. Small blue flowers dotted the stems like lace, and the thick strands of grass swiped at my mostly bare legs. Welts began to crop up in droves. _Now I'll just go right over there, juuuust across the clearing, and have a look around for... well, I don't know what. Maybe there will be a path. Or something._

But when I peered into the dense forest, all I saw was moss and trees.

"Genkai, this is not the time for a game of hide and seek!" I yodeled into the woods. "You can come out now! I promise I'll meditate like you asked!"

Even bribery, it seemed, did little to persuade my teacher. She did not appear to me.

"Maybe she'll come back if I meditate," I said to myself as I limped back to the boulder. I climbed up the slippery rock and assumed the position she taught me, and I tried to relax and breathe as was proper for a person meditating. Theta state, however, stayed just beyond my reach, chased away by my nervous mind and fluttering heart. Every creak of the tree branches overhead and every rustle of the grass in the wind translated to footsteps inside my head, and each time a noise broke my concentration I had to look up, glance around, make sure Genkai had not reappeared. She never did, much to my disappointment, and is it any wonder that I began to grow both furious and frustrated all at once?

_Maybe I should try walking back, _I thought as I grabbed for my cane again and slid back onto the ground. But then my fingers clenched around the cane and the I set the object back down on the rock._ Wait, wait, wait, what was it Dad said that time we went camping when I was ten? 'Never wander if you get lost. Stay in one place and make as much noise as you can. Someone will find you if you stay put.' _I smiled at the memory. Dad had insisted on taking me on that camping trip. He and his own father had done it when Dad was a kid, and he wanted to repeat the tradition. We never did it again, though, and with a sudden pang of homesickness I regretted not letting him take me to the state park more often.

"Thanks for beating that little mantra into me, Dad," I whispered, and my voice got carried away by the breeze. I crossed my arms atop the boulder and pillowed my forehead on them. "I'll wait here, just like you said, even if waiting isn't exactly my style. But Genkai knows where to find me, so it should all work out in the end." I listened to the world around me, cocking my head to the side to listen for (here's hoping) footsteps, but all I heard was more white noise: creaking wood, rushing wind, swaying grass.

My diagnosis: it was quiet.

_Too_ quiet.

"The silence is driving me nuts," I grumbled to myself as I leaned against the boulder. "I'm a music person, dammit—I'm not good with quiet!" Just then, however, the wind blew extra strong, and the stings of the ukelele hummed. "Oh, I'd nearly forgotten about you," I cooed as I picked up the instrument. "Help me drive away the quiet, will ya?" The rock, however, didn't look too inviting, so I eyed the grass in the clearing instead. I cleared a small patch of flat ground for myself by parting the grass at the roots, and then I lay down in my spot with a sigh. The grass flowed to form a canopy above me, a cocoon of living matter. It shielded me from the sun as I settled the ukelele on my stomach and stroked out a few chords with my thumb. No songs came to mind right away, so I just let notes drift on the wind for a long time. Zoning out was pretty easy; I didn't even realize I was doing it as I pulled out one of my most beloved songs and began to play the intro. My lips curled, a pleased smile making my cheeks ache, and when it came time to sing I opened my mouth and let the heart-felt lyrics go free.

'Soul Meets Body,' by Death Cab for Cutie, is good. I love the lyrics, especially the thought of mutual redemption and the way love between two people can change so much about a person. I can't say I'm a fan of their other songs, seeing as how I've only heard a couple, but that song will forever resonate with me. Each note hangs on a spirit of transcendence and selflessness, and I felt myself smile as I let the meaning—the song's sheer spiritual taste—of each and every word take over my mind and soul and heart.

"If the silence takes you then I hope it takes me, too," I sang as the song turned desperate and coalesced into an offer of sacrifice, and then I felt something... odd. My brain—suffused as it had been with meaning and emotion—was tickling at the back, just the way my throat would tickle with the beginnings of a sneeze. I let Genkai's advice of ignoring the physical take precedence, however, and I did not let myself become distracted from the emotional movie reel echoing through the place where my soul and body met. It was only once the song ended and the notes died away that I allowed myself to come back to reality and open my eyes.

The canopy above me had been somewhat parted, but shadows still touched my cheeks as twin red eyes stared down. Hiei and I looked at each other for a long, awkward moment before I sat up and he let go of the grass, allowing it to flow back above my head. I couldn't see him after that.

"How long have you been there?" I asked, face turning red. Had he been watching me so closely all this time?

"A few minutes," he said.

"I meant, how long have you been in my head?"

He paused before saying: "Long enough."

"Oh. Um. Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why were you in my head?"

"I don't speak your language."

"... is that an answer?"

"Yes."

Embarrassment melted away to be replaced by confusion. "Well, I don't get it."

His reply stunned me into silence. "I can't guess what we'll find when we dig through the earth with our palms cupped like shovels," he said, doing a wonderful Japanese translation of the poetic English lyrics, "but I know our dirty hands can wash each other until not one drop of sin remains. If death takes you then I want to die with you. Brown eyes, I hold you near. You're the only song I wish to hear. A melody flying gently through my sky." I could hear the satisfied smirk in his voice. "Is that about right?"

I closed my open mouth and tried not to scowl. "About," I said, not letting him have the last laugh. "Mind reading must be handy."

He did not reply.

Wriggling my cane upright, I stood, using it to gain some leverage. I saw him standing about five feet away as soon as my head cleared the waist-high grass, and he was not wearing his usual and shapeless black cloak. Instead he had pulled out an outfit that reminded me very much of what he wore during the Dark Tournament: a tattered white shirt with minimal sleeves, high-wasted black pants secured by two white belts, and nondescript black shoes with the pants tucked into them. He had his sword (sheathed, thank God) threaded through the belts so as to be easily accessible. Hands in pockets, slouched yet poised, blue-black hair moved in the breeze and blew into wide cherry-red eyes, eyes so intense they seemed to draw in the color from everything around—

"You're staring," he said, sparing no time for subtlety.

Looking away was a quick process. "Sorry."

He said nothing.

"So, um... you're my teacher?" I ventured.

"Perceptive of you," he said, mouth quirking. He did not budge, other than that lip movement.

I fidgeted. "Should I... um... do something?"

He looked pensive for a second, and then his eyes flickered toward—you guessed it—the boulder. "Sit," he said, and so I went (grudgingly) to do as told. He followed at a breathing-down-my-neck distance of six feet (hey, that seems pretty damn close for a guy as aloof as Hiei) but did not sit with me. He spoke once I got settled.

"Genkai said you can enter meditation while playing music," he said, leaning against the rock with his back to me. Arms folded, head bowed... I could see his face in three-quarter profile; his eyes were closed, and in that light he looked almost... handsome. "I saw you do that just now. I also saw how bad you are at keeping people out of your mind when you enter theta state."

I scowled, unhappy with the criticism. I was a beginner, after all: did he expect mastery in only a day?

"You didn't try to push me out at all," he continued. "I will teach you how to block other minds from entering your own."

"Sounds good to me. How do we start?"

"Play your music now, Dani."

My name sounded the strangest in his mouth. It was like he was trying to handle an object made of glass, but an object with an unknown purpose whose secrets he wanted to unravel. Like he was figuring me out by giving my name a careful examination, a light touch, a searching glance.

"Something wrong?" he said when I did not start to play.

"Oh, um..." I wracked my brain for an explanation. "I was just wondering if you wanted words or just music."

His eyes opened, narrowed, glinted despite the shade hanging over the two of us. "Does it matter?" he snapped.

"Well, Genkai said—"

"I am not Genkai."

I stared at him. He closed his eyes. We sat in a long, drawn out silence of battling wills.

"Words," he said at last.

I chose not to comment on the fact that I had totally won that round (not that Hiei had even been competing, mind you, but my pride is a boundless thing, so...). I settled down into my pose and balanced the ukelele on my knee, and as I stroked the strings I felt myself arrive at a song I had only tried to sing maybe twice in my entire life.

_That won't do, _I thought. _I'll think about it too much._ But when I tried for another song the tune of the first stayed lodged inside my ear, and everything I strummed on the ukelele turned into my first choice. I ground my teeth together.

"What's taking so long?" Hiei asked, impatient, and my fingers stopped moving.

"Don't rush me," I snapped back. "I have a song stuck in my head but I don't know how to play it very well on this instrument. Piano I could do, but the ukelele? Way too weird."

"Then just make it up as you go along," he said, and from the tension in his jaw I could tell he was not happy at the delay.

"Easy for you to say. You're not the one with the ukelele."

"You're incredibly annoying," Hiei said. My jaw dropped. "Shut up and sing and stop the theatrics. You aren't impressing anyone."

I had no pithy reply to offer him, nor did I stomp off in a huff or hit him or cry or scream. I just sat there in stony silence before opening my mouth and letting a very special song spill forth.

"I heard there was a secret chord that David played, and it pleased the Lord. But you don't really care for music, do ya?" I spat out that last part, and my emotions—hurt, angry, incensed—tainted the mournful (but pure, so pure) feeling behind the words. I stumbled over gaps, mangled chords, and made what was most likely a fool out of myself, but I didn't care. I simply had a point to prove, even if I didn't consciously know what point that was, and when I was finished and the song faded into silence without me once entering theta state... well, Hiei just sat there for a long time. My cheeks grew hotter the longer he sat, and embarrassment rushed to take the place of anger.

"I see now that you're not one who can work under pressure," he said at last. He pushed away from the boulder. "I won't waste my time on someone like you." Feet crushed grass beneath them as he walked, ever so slowly, across the clearing and out of sight.

And I regret to say that I watched him go without a word.

* * *

It took me a few minutes to gather my scattered wits. When I did, all I could do was hang my head in shame. _I'm such a brat_, I thought as I stared at the ukelele lying dormant in my hands. _I should have known Hiei would act like that, and what did I do? I baited him! Jeez, Dani, you are the single most stupid person on this entire planet!_

But even with my silent apology, Hiei did not return.

"I'm sorry," I called out to the empty clearing, opting for a verbal apology instead. "I'll try harder. It's my fault and I promise I'll be better."

No response, not even the tickle of his consciousness on mine.

_He didn't really leave me, did he?_ I thought as I felt my heart start to beat a little faster. Slowly I slid off the rock and grabbed my cane; then I waded through the grass toward the spot Hiei had vanished from. But when I squinted past the dark treeline and into the woods beyond, I caught no glimpse of the fire apparition anywhere.

"Now what do I do?" I said, forcing the words out of my dry mouth. "An apology didn't work..."

I promptly face-palmed. "Duh, it didn't work," I whispered. "Since when have words meant a thing to Hiei? Actions speak louder and whatnot. Ugh, I'm so _stupid_." Turning on my heel with a new purpose, I marched right back over to the rock and climbed it, settling the ukelele in my lap as I readied it for playing. Music rippled out from me, spinning through the air like silken cobweb, and without preemptive I began to sing Switchfoot's "Dare You to Move" as best I could. I knew the song well, albeit on a six-string guitar, but I was able to transfer the haunting piece to the ukelele without much trouble. But I was so nervous that it took almost five rounds of the song for me to calm down enough to even begin to enter theta state, and eventually my voice tapered off and all I did was play the song's melody over and over again.

The words, however, still echoed in my head as I found myself suffused in the white-gold light of my subconscious. It was the glow Genkai had helped me find when we mediated together, the warm presence of my own energy and life.

_Welcome to the planet, welcome to existence..._

I actually felt when Hiei entered my mind, and I did not question it as he began to itch his way across the meaning in my head.

_Maybe redemption has stories to tell_

_Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell_

_Where can you run to escape from yourself?_

_Where you gonna go?_

_Where you gonna go?_

_Salvation is here_

_Push me out, _I heard his voice say as the song began again, bleeding seamlessly into the one that came before. And so I tried. But then the music began to fade away as I made a conscious effort to repel him, and I felt his presence yank me back into theta state and soothe my mind so I did not wake up.

_Don't force it,_ he said._ Just repel me. _

_I'll hurt the music,_ I said, lyrics and speech melding together.

_Then use the music. It's yours._

That fact struck me like a blow, like a light shining harsh on my face. _I've been treating the music like something separate, _I thought. _But it's not separate. It's me. It's my spirit's energy._

_Yes, _Hiei thought. _Yes, it is._

The music crashed into me a moment later as I finally learned to dive into its heart, and then I did what came naturally: I made the music louder. Louder and louder it grew, a massive crescendo of sound and emotion that overrode everything else, until I was the music and the music was me and we were one and the same and inseparably intertwined. The sound of the music drowned out Hiei's itch, made him fade like a painting that stayed too long in the light of a blinding sun. I could no longer feel him, focused as I was on the beautiful music, and I swam lost in a sea of melody and harmony...

I felt like crying when a strand of darkest black speared through the roaring music and touched my presence. The energy curled around me, pulling me into its quietness, and suddenly I could feel the wind in my hair again and the way the right foot had fallen very much to sleep. My eyes fluttered open. Hiei knelt before me on the boulder, face inches from my own, staring at me with three eyes the colors of a sunset—just like the one staining the sky behind him.

"How long was I doing that?" I said thickly, feeling as if I had awoken from a deep, languid sleep. Hadn't it just been daytime a few minutes before?

His hands dropped, but he did not move away. I looked at his red eyes in fascination, and when he still did not move away or reprimand me for staring I blushed and looked down.

"You need to be careful," he said.

I needed to move, so I stretched my arms above my head and felt my shoulders pop. My leg screamed for blood, so I stretched it out. My fingers crackled in the air above me, stiff and sore. "Careful of what?" I said, arching forward so my vertebrae could stretch.

His rough voice dropped until it was almost... soft? "You were in theta for several hours," he said.

I sat up. Stared at his mouth instead of his incredible eyes. "Wow, really? Didn't feel like it."

He stood, turned, and took a step into thin air. His boots hit the ground with a thump. "When you enter theta and then dive deep the way you did, you risk the chance of never waking up again," he said, and his blue hair seemed to glow from within as the sun toyed with the strands. "You slipped into delta waves while you were still inside yourself. It took me a long time to find you in there. Had I not been here to draw you out, you might never have..."

The implied meaning hung heavy on the air.

"We're done for today," Hiei said. "But don't meditate and then touch the music like that unless I am near." He looked at me out of the corner of his eye as he reached into his pant's pocket and pulled out a strip of white cloth. I guessed what he would use it for before he began to tie it around his forehead, covering his third eye. "You can't control your own energy, and until you learn how it would be wise to not tempt fate."

"Alright," I said. "Would you hand me my backpack? It's on the ground next to you..."

He had already picked it up by the time I had said 'backpack.'

"Thanks," I said as I put the ukelele inside. For what seemed the millionth time I took up my cane and got off the rock. "Back to the temple?" I asked, slinging the pack across my shoulders.

"We need to get back to the temple before sundown," he said, and he began (without much by way of warning) to walk away with his hands jammed deep into his pockets.

"I don't mind walking in the dark," I said, moving to catch up.

"You would if you knew what came out to play when it gets dark," he said as his long stride moved him ahead of me. "Hurry. We must move."

Let's just say we didn't get far before he had to stop to wait for me to gain ground.

"Can't you move any faster?" he snapped when I panted up next to him, bending over from the waist to catch my breath.

"No," I wheezed. "Cripple, remember?"

He was silent for a moment. "There's no other choice," he murmured, and what he said next was a bit louder: "I am going to carry you. We can't get caught out here."

My pride stung. "I can make it," I said, standing upright and walking past him. But then his hand lashed out and curled tight around my wrist, and his fingers were hot against my skin.

"No, you can't," he said, and jerked me toward him. My legs went out from under me as he picked me up, and I uttered a small scream when he jumped straight up into the air. I closed my mouth and buried my face in his shirt, fingers twining into the fabric as the sickening motion made my head spin. Leaves and twigs streaked over my skin and clothing, and I would have been buffeted to death had it not been for Hiei bracing me from underneath. The wind rushed by and the momentum of his jump faded, was replaced by the sensation of falling, and I screeched again and held on tighter. A thump jarred us and made my teeth smash together, and then we went still. I didn't move a muscle.

"I won't jump like that again," he said, the words vibrating deep in his chest. "Stop hiding."

"I'm not opening my eyes," I said.

"Look."

"I'm too scared."

"I won't drop you."

Unbelievably, I found myself trusting him. My eyes cracked open.

"Raise your head," he said.

I swung my face away from his chest, but my eyes closed on their own. I felt his arms—one hooked under my knees, the other wrapped around my back beneath the pack—tighten in a silent command. But when I did not look around that time, he did not push it. Instead, he started to speak.

"We're on the top of a tree," he said slowly. "The tree is on the top of a hill. We are very high up. There is a small valley below us, and the sun is setting on the other side of it. If you look hard enough you can see the temple silhouetted against the sun."

My eyes opened.

"If you are ever lost, head west. That's the direction of the temple and the main road. Heading east will take you to the sea. North is mountains; south is the village of Sakana."

"It's beautiful up here," I whispered as I finally gathered the courage to look around.

Hiei didn't say anything, but his arms relaxed around me.

I had never really thought about what Genkai's land looked like before that moment. Even though I had had two excursions into it (the first when I was dropped in the forest; the second just before my meditation training) I had never taken the time to drink in its beauty, majesty, poise. Dark trees, evergreens and oaks and all manner of trees I had no name for, bled together like a single being beneath the light of the setting sun, swaying and undulating like a living thing in the fingers of the insistent wind. Mountains peaked high in the distance, snow-capped and ominous. Rolling hills stretched out like a skein of satin. I could see, far to my right, a patch of swampland, and beyond that was a glimmering arc of... water?

"The sea," Hiei said, reading my mind without the use of his Jagan.

"I want to see it some day," I said, more to myself than to Hiei, but he heard me nonetheless.

"Ask the others. I have no need to see it."

"Not even to have fun?" I asked before thinking about it.

He didn't say anything, so I looked up at him. His eyes were trained far into the distance, looking for things I could not fathom. But my gaze was not light, and he felt it on him and looked down at me. His unreal eyes glowed in the sun illuminating his face, and for a moment he seemed less live a devil and more like... Not an angel, never that, but...

"I don't have fun," he murmured, lips barely moving.

My eyebrows dove down. "Have you ever_ let_ yourself have fun?"

"Why would I?"

I was the first to look away. "If I had to bet," I said, "I would bet that you aren't very happy with your life, Hiei."

"That's neither here nor there."

"But you're not denying it." I looked up at him again. He was still looking at me. "Maybe try to relax sometime. It might make you happier than you think."

"We have to go," he said. "Close your eyes. The wind will dry them out."

And in the moment his face fell into the darkness behind my eyes, we began to move.

* * *

We touched down outside the temple one bone-shaking ride later. His arm slipped out from under my legs and I stumbled, hardpressed to find my balance on such short notice, and I opened my eyes to find myself standing in the courtyard just at the top of the temple's steps. Night had fallen sometime during out trip, but I could see lights burning in orange paper lanterns on the temple porch. They lit up the surrounding area with a cheerful glow. Hiei had touched down just outside of the circle of light they cast.

"Never," I said as I fought back a surge of nausea, "let me do that with you again."

He made a 'humph'ing sort of noise. "You wouldn't have had to do it the first time if you could walk any faster."

I ignored the comment in favor of voicing my own. "I'm too short to be good with heights. Dunno why it's not the same with you."

"Maybe it's because I'm not a coward."

I glared at him. He smirked. I leveled my index finger at his face and shook it, twice, and he blinked at me. The smirk faded.

"I'm on to you," I said. "Taking jabs at me whenever you can. But I know you're more of a softie than you let on."

"Hardly."

I shook my finger again. "No, you are. You could have just left me alone in the woods after that little fight of ours, but instead you stayed around to see if I would actually go into theta like you wanted. That was almost... nice."

He didn't say anything, but I could tell he was looking at me even with the shadows lying against his skin.

"And then you actually helped me use my spirit powers to form a mental block," I went on. "And you didn't have to pull me out of delta when I went too deep. You.. well, you saved my life." I tried not to blush. "Thank you."

"You don't understand."

"Oh, but I do. You're a good person underneath all the bluster. You're just reluctant to show it." I then did the thing that I did with all of my good male friends back home, the thing that always made me 'one of the guys' and the thing I hoped would put Hiei at ease around me: I mock-punched him in the shoulder and grinned like a carnival clown who'd eaten too much caffeine. His eyes went wider than normal, and even after I finished punching him he continued to stare at the spot I had touched on his arm. "Don't worry though. I'll keep your secret, buddy."

It took him a moment to look back at me, and his eyes glittered with... I don't know what. Their color appeared pale brown in the nighttime shade. "You really _don't_ understand," he said.

_Wait, what?_ "I don't?"

"I didn't hang around after we 'fought.'"

I had no idea what to say.

"I left. For almost five hours."

My jaw dropped.

"When you didn't show up at the temple I went back to look for you, thinking you'd probably gotten yourself killed, and that's when I found you there, deep into delta. I decided to take advantage of your meditative state and show you to use your energy."

I closed my mouth, pursed my lips, and sighed. "So that means you really_ didn't_ care."

"Not in the slightest."

You know that anime moment when a character's eyebrow twitches and they grow weird fangs for no reason other than extreme agitation? Yeah, imagine that, only more realistic. "And here I thought I'd seen your soft side. Made quite the fool out of me, didn't you?"

"Apparently." He sidestepped me, slipping his hands into his pockets as he did so, and with even steps he walked into the circle of light surrounding the temple. "Let's go inside. The others will be missing you soon."

But I didn't follow, not right away. "Why do you always end up embarrassing yourself, Dani?" I murmured in English. I put all my weight on my right foot, tucked the crook of the cane into my elbow, and threaded my fingers through my hair. The motion of it titled my face skyward, and for a moment I let the breeze wash over my face. "Only you can dig yourself this many holes in one day."

I opened my eyes. Stopped. Stared.

"Oh wow," I said.

"Why are you standing there?" Hiei asked from behind me.

Rather than answer, I turned around and said: "I need a good place to see the sky."

He snorted. "Good luck. Trees surround the temple on all sides."

But therein lay the answer to my problem. "Then how do I get on the roof?"

He did what he had done earlier and picked me up. A second later we were airborne, and then his shoes connected with the roof tiles. Mine connected soon after.

"Don't _do _that!" I snapped as I staggered away from him.

"You all but asked me to do it," he said with much less ferocity than I had used. "Now why did you want to come up here, exactly?"

The half-circle clay tiles beneath my feet were slippery, so rather than stand I decided to sit and slide until my feet were braced in the gutter at the roof's edge. After I got comfy I pulled the ukelele from my backpack and set my fingers on the strings.

"I really wanted to look at the stars," I said.

Stars back in my home world, especially in the city, are dim, distant, and impersonal. They are cold balls of far-away fire swirling on a blanket of inky black. But stars in the Yu Yu Hakusho world seem much closer, like you could reach out and touch them, move your fingers through the pool of glimmering diamonds and mix them up into a whirlpool of sparkle and shine. They are backed by deep, velvety blue that's soft to the eye, so soft looking that you could almost made a dress out of it. The total effect looks almost fake to someone of my background, but the alien impression almost begs to be admired and written about.

Or sang about.

My fingers began to strum out a tune that had a little bit to do with stars, but I didn't sing anything as I tried to pick out familiar constellations. I recognized only a few of them, but luckily one of my favorites (and one of my dimension's most notable formations) had remained intact despite the dimensional gap.

_It's nice to know there's a little piece of home watching over me, _I thought as I stared at it with a fond smile. _Who knew our worlds had this much in common, after all?_

I jumped when Hiei joined me in bracing his heels in the temple gutter.

"See those three stars in a row?" I asked, taking a break from the music to point. Hiei's eyes followed my gaze, and he nodded. "Back where I come from, they're called 'Orion's Belt.' There's an old legend attached to them. They say that a long time ago there was a giant named Orion who was a very good friend of the goddess of the hunt, Artemis. Others say they were lovers."

"What's your point?"

I shot him a dark look. "Artemis's brother, Apollo, was jealous of their friendship, love, whatever. So one day Apollo taunted Artemis and told her that she couldn't hit a tiny dot out at sea with an arrow. She was prideful, so she proved him wrong by shooting at the target. She hit it."

"Again, your point?"

"The target was Orion, swimming way out at sea."

This time he didn't question me.

"The king of the gods wasn't happy that such a good hunter had been killed like that, so he immortalized Orion in the stars. The three stars I pointed out are his belt." I began to play the ukelele again. "Another version of the story is that Apollo created a giant scorpion to kill Orion. Then there's the version that Orion boasted he could and would kill every animal on the planet, so Mother Earth made a scorpion to kill him."

"Why are you telling me all this?"

I didn't say anything for a second. "I guess... I just miss my home a lot," I said at last. "It's nice to see something so familiar here. I just... wanted to share that with someone." I smiled. "I could tell so many stories about my home. You'd probably die of boredom."

"Maybe."

I struck a chord that began my newest song, and as I did so I felt the itch of Hiei's presence in my head. "I dig my toes into the sand," I sang. "The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket. I lean against the wind, pretend that I am weightless, and in this moment I am happy... happy." The stars burned bright above me, and, oddly enough, I felt my throat tighten with the onset of sudden tears. A stray one rolled down my cheek despite my best efforts to hold it in. "I... wish you were here," I sang, pushing past the homesickness. "I wish you were here."

The song passed quickly. I didn't quite have the heart to drag it out. Hiei, thank the powers, didn't say anything until I was through.

"Your voice isn't very strong," he said.

"Shut up," I replied, but halfheartedly.

"But your music, the words, they're... nice."

I looked at him. He was scowling, as if giving me any sort of compliment was physically painful. Still, a compliment was a compliment, and I smiled.

"Thanks." I wiped my wrist over my eyes to dry them, scrubbing my feelings of depression away. "The stars are really pretty here. This is the first time I've been outside at nighttime. I wish I'd seen them earlier."

Hiei stood up. "They're as dangerous as they are beautiful," he said. "Rogue demons haunt the forest. You could be attacked while looking at the stars you like so much."

My heart sank. _He's gonna tell me that I'm non going to be allowed to come outside again. Just my luck. _

He paused. "But... as long as you're with someone, you should be safe." He turned away. "Now get up. The others are beginning to worry."

I didn't fight him and stood. But, rather than just let him sweep me off the roof with no warning, I went up to him willingly and braced myself. "Alright, let's get down. I'm totally ready."

But I wasn't ready for what he did. Instead of holding me the way he had earlier, he just wrapped one arm around my thighs and lifted me almost over his shoulder. We were on the ground before I could so much as squeak.

"I'm making a new rule," I growled as he put me down. "No picking me up without discussing the 'how' first. Got that, three-eyes?"

He did not smile, but he didn't frown, either. "I'll do what I want," he said, brushing past to head not for the temple, but rather the stairs leading to the road.

"Wait, where are you going?" I asked, taking a step after him.

"Don't follow me," he said, and I stopped just at the edge of the circle of lantern light. He stood totally in shadow; all I could see was his outline in the dark.

"But... where are you going?" I asked.

"Does it matter?" he said.

"What will I tell the others? That you just disappeared?"

"Do I care?"

My head drooped. "Probably not." I turned and began to walk back toward the temple. "Well, see you around, I guess."

I had taken only a few steps when his voice drifted to me over the breeze. "Do you really believe that?" he said as I whipped around to stare at him.

I did not know to what he was referring, but unlike Genkai and the others he was not able to see the confusion in my face and my epically raised eyebrows. "Believe in what?" I was forced to say when he did not—or would not—elaborate further. "That you don't care what I tell the others?"

"No."

A moment of silence. "What, then?" I asked, frustrated.

"Do you... believe that song?"

I laughed without humor. "I sang, what, three songs in front of you today? Maybe four? You're gonna have to tell me more than that."

He was silent. "The one about redemption," he said. "The first one."

"Oh, 'Soul Meets Body?'" I thought about it. "Well, aside from believing that Death Cab for Cutie did a great job with that song... yeah, I guess I do believe in what it says."

"Why?"

"Why_ not_?"

He went all quiet again, waiting for me to speak.

I shook my head in exasperation. "If two people can't redeem each other, Hiei, then what's the point?"

"The point of what?"

"Of..." The question caught me off guard. "Of... well, living."

"I don't understand."

I calculated my answer before speaking. "People need people. It's natural. Haven't you ever met someone who made you see the world in a different way?"

He said nothing.

"For instance, my best friend back home. She helped me not get embarrassed about my leg when I went out in public. I wouldn't be who I am today if not for her."

"That's not redemption."

"Maybe not the conventional kind. But she certainly redeemed me from being constantly insecure and angry at myself for being born."

"For being born?"

I stared at the ground and then at the twisted calf peeking out from under the hem of my shorts. "Kids made fun of me when I was little. I hated myself, blamed myself, thought I was the worst kind of freak." Thoughts of my bestie made me smile, even if the smile was a bitter one. "And then Lauren came along. Her optimism changed me. To her I was unique, not a freak. I was still a person and not something to be gawked at. She was the first to see through my body and to the real me underneath." I offered Hiei my most winning smile and hoped it would brighten the rapidly darkening mood. "You've known Yusuke and the others for a long time, right?" I asked. "Kuwabara told me so. The people here must have changed you for the better, too, Hiei. Right?"

He turned away from me. "Nonsense," he said.

For a second I thought he had dismissed me entirely. I considered stopping him as he began his slow walk down the temple stairs, and then I remembered something.

"Like I said," I whispered in English. "I'm on to you."

And as I went inside, into the light and warmth of the temple crowd, I thought about that one episode of the anime in which Hiei has said 'nonsense' to Kurama. In that episode, he hadn't meant what he said at all.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_So this was going to get cut off way early, and then it turned into the longest chapter of this fic to date (over 7,000 words!). Guess I just like Hiei. Buuuut don't worry, expect just as much one-on-one time with other characters. I just had so many ideas and I felt like they needed to be used!_

_Also, um, this is kinda weird, but... I have a twitter account (eep!). So if you twitter (tweet?) and would like to friend me or whatever it's called, my name is GeorgiaBlaine13. I love making friends!_

_I have endeavored to draw Dani. It's not great and I haven't been able to upload it to the computer yet, but keep an eye on my profile because I'll be putting up a link soon. It's a collage, of sorts, containing a a close-up of her face, a body shot, a sketch of her torso and face, and a concept sketch of her shape-shifter body's true form (the creepy one)._

_Used a bunch of songs in this chapter; dunno quite why. The first was 'Soul Meets Body' by Death Cab For Cutie. The second was 'Hallelujah' by Jeff Buxley. The third was 'Dare You to Move' by Switchfoot. The fourth, 'Wish You Were Here,' is by Incubus. They are all wonderful and they are all worth an experimental listen or two, or three, or four!_

_Many, many super-special thanks to my reviewers! Reclun, [no name in the name box, whoops!], DoilyRox, 0nfateswings, rain chant, ShadowFireFox13, crossyourteez, Royal B A N D A I D, Kai-Chan94, Wolf-Cry-Night, WickedLovelyDream, Shun, Lissa's Guardian, and heve-chan!_


	19. Chapter 19: Hear Me Now

Future Talk

Chapter 19:

"Hear Me Now"

* * *

Everyone looked up when I walked in. The air in the kitchen felt a little too warm after the cool atmosphere outside, but it smelled like cocoa and tea and something else that was especially sweet so I didn't care too much about the heat.

Predictably, everyone—Genkai, Yusuke, Jin, Yukina, Botan, and even the still-present Kenichi—wanted to know where Hiei was and why he hadn't walked me inside.

"He dropped me off and left," I said, moving to sit between Botan (_When'd she get here? _I wondered) and Jin at the big wooden table.

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "That's Hiei for you," he said. "Always cuts and runs."

"Would you like cocoa or tea, Dani-san?" Yukina said as she came up behind my chair. She had tucked her hair up into a high ponytail; oddly enough, she resembled a much more demure Botan given that she was wearing an aquamarine kimono. Botan, however, was wearing civilian clothes instead of the pink kimono she favored in the anime.

"Um, cocoa," I said.

"I figured you for tea, myself," Jin said as Yukina moved away from me to get the cocoa.

"Oh really?"

"Ya don't look too much like a girl who's fond of her sweets," he said, reaching out a hand and curling his fingers around my wrist. He had big hands, hands much larger than my own. "Bony little thing ya are. Probably eat like a bird, too."

"Yes, I noticed that as well," Botan said, leaning toward me from across the table. Then she turned around and called: "Yukina-chan, I think this is a perfect opportunity to take your sweet roll out of the oven and test out that new recipe. Dani-san needs a little fattening up, wouldn't you say?"

My cheeks went red when Yukina looked me over and nodded in the affirmative.

"I've always been frail," I mumbled, feeling self-consciousness bubble up. "Sorry."

Jin saw the embarrassed look on my face and frowned, the expression etching unnatural lines on his otherwise cheerful countenance. "Aye, no need to go apologizin' for nature and what it gave ya."

His close scrutiny and earnest eyes made me twitch in my seat. Don't look at me, I thought as his unwavering eyes never left my face. But then Yukina returned with my cocoa and I had a chance to divert the attention away from myself.

"Thank you," I said, taking the cocoa and raising it to my lips.

"You might want to wait until it cools—" she started to say, but the warning came too late. I gave a little shriek as the piping hot liquid scalded my tongue and throat on the way down, and with haste I set the cup down. Rich brown liquid sloshed out the side in a streak of sweet, dark chocolate, painting a river running down the cup.

_How the hell did I miss all the steam?_ I thought, watching as heat rose in waves from the mug.

"Gettin' ahead of yourself, Dani-san," Jin said, laughing a little. The concern in his eyes was not overshadowed by the attempt at humor. "Here, let me help you."

"I'm fine," I said, but my words were drowned out by the sound of the small small whirl-wind he had gathered around the tip of his index finger. The cyclone floated away from his hand in naught but a second and hovered over my drink, drawing the heat waves into it like a vacuum. The entire display vansihed a second later, and I heard Botan gasp in pleasure at the sight.

"That was so cool, Jin-san!" she squeaked.

"Yeah, buddy," Yusuke said, standing and leaning to punch Jin on the shoulder. "It was cool and all, but quick showin' off. Dani's not used to that stuff; you might give her a heart attack."

Kenichi glanced at Genkai with wide, eager eyes. "Can I learn to do that?" he asked, and his teacher scowled and shook her head.

"Aw, I'll teach the little guy if he really wants to learn," the windmaster said, rubbing at the back of his neck in pleased embarrassment. Genkai just sighed and shrugged, taking a long pull from her tea in resignation. Kenichi, on the other hand, whooped a little from joy.

"First I get to spend the night, and now I get to learn something from a real live demon!" he said. "This is the best day ever!"

Yusuke grabbed him in a head-lock and rumpled the baseball cap covering the kid's hair. "Don't forget that you and me are gonna train our butts off tomorrow, squirt."

As the pair squabbled in the way very familiar (and fond) friends or brothers always do, Jin leaned over to me and whispered: "Go on, drink. It's better now."

I warily picked up the cup and took a sip. Somehow he's gotten it to a nigh but perfect temperature. When he saw me take another drink he started grinning.

"There ya go," he said, and something in the way he said it—softly, like the way he'd speak to a skittish cat, and dotingly, like the way he'd speak to a favorite pet—made my virtual hackles rise up in agitation. I put the cup back down and glanced around Yukina looked sort of busy as she bustled about the kitchen, so I decided to use her as an escape route.

"Thanks for cooling my drink," I said to Jin, not looking at him. Then I raised my eyes to the ice apparition on the other side of the room. "Let me help you, Yukina-san," I said as I lurched out of my chair.

Jin caught my arm and tugged me back down with his trademark grin. "Hey, you've been a-workin' all day," he said. "Rest your bones."

I tried to shake his hand off of me, noticing how cool his fingers were on my skin when he didn't let go. _So he acts like a breeze and feels like one too, _I thought as I stood again. I smiled at him, trying to appear polite but firm. "I get antsy when I just sit around watching people work."

"But you—"

"But nothing. I can help Yukina and not break," I said, patience thinning.

"Just let her do what she wants, Jin," Genkai said, speaking for the first time. I glanced at her. She was looking neither at me nor at Jin but rather at the mug of tea clutched in her gnarled fingers.

"But..." He looked at me; even though I was standing we were nearly on eye level with one another. I had trouble, for whatever reason, in meeting his eyes, but then his fingers dropped from my arm and I glanced at him again. He was frowning, staring down at the floor—

_No, not at the floor,_ I realized with dawning dislike. _He's looking at my leg._

"Well, go n' help," he said, relocating his attention to my face. "Just take it easy."

I didn't answer as I pushed my chair away and walked around the table, trying with all I had to make my limp as unpronounced as possible. When I looked back at the table over my shoulder a second later, I saw that Yusuke, Jin, and Botan had all been roped into a small demonstration by the exuberant Kenichi. He had levitated—levitated!—his empty cocoa mug between his cupped palms and was showing off as he spun it around in midair. Jin blasted mini-funnels of heat-wave wind from his extended index finger, trying to buffet the cup out of Kenichi's small grip, but the small boy held on admirably. Everyone was watching and laughing at the spectacle—except for maybe the grave Genkai, who was still at least watching—and I felt a momentary pang of homesickness make my heart sink.

"No one laughs with me like that," I murmured in English.

"Did you say something, Dani-san?"

I jumped and turned; Yukina was standing behind me, smiling in an expectant sort of way.

"Oh, no," I told her. "I was just wondering how I could help you."

She bowed a little. "Thank you. Getting out the plates and dessert forks would be nice." She pointed. "The forks are in that drawer, and the plates are in that cupboard."

"Gotcha," I said, and I moved to get the forks. After placing them on the counter I went for the cupboard with the plates, and then I paused.

I watched as Yukina busied herself at the oven and pulled a steaming hot tray from its depths. The sweet scent in the room intensified as she used a spatula to transfer the roll to a cooling rack. The cylindrical confection oozed what looked like cinnamon out of the ends; the crust itself looked flaky and gooey and worthy of the phrase 'melts in your mouth.'

"Just one minute more," Yukina murmured as she raised her hands over the sweet bun. Her fingernails started to glow with a familiar blue-white light, and then the glow began to shine down on to the steaming bun. The heat waves radiating from the sweet dissipated, and with a sigh she let her hands drop. I noticed, then, that sweat had beaded on her brow, and with another sigh she reached up an wiped the drops away on the back of her hand. Then she realized that I was watching her, and she smiled.

"It's hard for me to interact with such intense heat," she said as she turned on the faucet and washed her hands. "My power is more introverted, good at things like healing as opposed to fighting."

"Genkai said the same thing about my energy type," I told her. "Only I don't think I'll ever be able to use it very well."

"Why not?" Yukina said as she took a long knife from a nearby drawer.

I hung my head. "Well, I kind of... um..."

"Have trouble getting the hang of it?"

_How can she put such embarrassing stuff in such neat context?_ I thought. _I was going to say that I outright sucked._ "Something like that."

Her smile belied her arctic heritage. "It's never easy, not at first. I've been learning since I was a child. As an adult who had never even known that they possessed energy until now, I can't imagine how difficult it must be to adjust to such a change. But Genkai-san is a wonderful teacher, and Hiei-san has saved my life several times so I am sure he will do his best to help you as well." She carved the first slice of cake, balancing the slice on the flat of the carving blade, but when she looked around for something to put the slice on she paused. I took a moment to study the cake: it looked like Yukina had beaten out a large sheet of dough, spread cinnamon-sugar-syrup all over it, and then rolled it into a log. The swirls in the cake's center all wept delicious-looking filling.

"Plates?" she asked me, trying not to drip that filling on her clothes or the floor.

"Oh!" I went to the appropriate cabinet and opened it. However, the cabinet was the type that hangs from the ceiling above a flat counter top, and the result is that the plates were all high above my diminutive reach. "Oh, um..."

"Here, hold this," Yukina said, handing me the precariously balanced cake slice. But, when she tried to reach the plates, she also failed.

"Um, no offense," I said, "but I think we're both way too short for this." I held out the cake. "Take that. I think I can get those plates."

"Why don't we just ask Botan-san; she's tall enough," Yukina said.

I glanced at the table; everyone, including Botan, looked like they were deep into conversation. "I wouldn't want to interrupt then," I said, and I hung the crooked end of my cane into the handle of a nearby drawer. Bracing my arms on the tile counter, I pushed up like I was trying to climb out of a swimming pool and set my good knee atop the counter. "There, you see!" I said, looking down at my worried-faced friend. "I totally can get those plates."

"I don't think that's such a good idea," Yukina said as I handed the first dish down to her.

"Oh, it'll be fine," I said, and one by one I got down all the dishes. My mission went off without a hitch until I was preparing to get dismount.

"Dani-san, what are you doin'!"

I turned. Jin had stood up at the table and was watching me in horror.

"Getting plates," I said, not understanding his expression.

"Get down!" he said. "That's dangerous, that it is!"

"I'll be fine," I said, but I did move to get down like he asked, and I was doing just fine, too, until the wind demon rounded the table at a near run and skittered up to me. He moved so close to the counter that my escape route became utterly blocked. I peered over my shoulder at him and scowled.

"I can't get down with you standing there," I said. I leaned to flatten my palms on the counter.

"If ya needed the plates so bad, ya just had to ask," he said, hands coming up to grab me by the arms.

"Hey, let go, I—"

"Let me help," he pleaded, and then something weird happened. One minute I was trying to get down on my own, and the next Jin was lifting me up by my elbows. Startled, I jerked away from him, but he didn't let go and I was yanked backward into his chest. I reacted on reflex when I felt myself fall, so I threw my center of gravity forward, and—

_Chonk._

"Dani-san!" Yukina said as I slid until my feet touched floor, trapped tight between Jin and the counter like a weird Dani-sandwich. Blood—where had that come from?—slid over my left eye, so I frowned and put my hand to my head. Jin moved away with a gasp when the red liquid smeared over my fingers.

"What just happened?" I said, and then I felt dizzy. I slumped. Jin caught me.

"You hit the cabinet on your way down, that you did!" Jin said. He smelled good, even in my hazy state, like pine and fresh air and sunlight. "I told ya that was a bad idea, Dani-san!"

My temper flared. "I wouldn't have gotten hurt if you hadn't tried to 'help' me," I snapped, pushing away from him. His eyes went wide as I grabbed my cane and pressed my palm to the three-inch gash marring my hairline. "I'll be in my room!"

Yukina reached out and put her hand on my arm. "At least let me stop the bleeding," she pleaded.

"You're tired from cooling the cake," I said, but she just shook her head and traced a finger over my hair. The stinging pain—the pain I was only just beginning to feel—faded before it had a chance to start. "Thank you." I took a step away from her and staggered despite the help of my cane.

"Here, let me carry—" Jin said, reaching out, and I pulled away before he could touch me.

"I can do it on my own!" I said with snarl, and he recoiled. I took another step and fell again, wooziness growing.

"You can't get there on your own!" Jin protested, but I waved him off.

"I'm going to go wash the blood off my face," I said, trying not to look at anyone. "See you guys later."

I left without another word, anger and embarrassment and the after-effects of a sharp blow to the head making me weave and stumble down the hall.

* * *

The shower felt like heaven, but the blood flowing down the drain looked more like hell. _Fitting, considering all the demons I hang out with,_ I thought as I scrubbed the blood from my skin and hair. Once I was clean and stinging I made my laborious way over to the giant tub for a good long soak. _Peace at last, peace at last,_ I thought as I sank completely under the water. I stayed down there until I ran out of breath, but when I surfaced I saw that peace was not something that was going to stay with me for very long.

"May I sit with you, Dani-san?" Botan said as she hovered by the door. I didn't answer her, not right away, and I took the time to pull all of my long brown hair back into a sopping wet tail as thick as my wrist.

"Sure," I finally said.

She smiled, but I could tell that it wasn't her natural cheery grin. She grabbed one of the shower stools and brought it over, arranging it next to the tub with a lot more borderline-OCD care than Botan usually took the time to take (whoa, that cut must have really scrambled my brain, because that sentence is mega warped). I didn't look at her as I combed my fingers through my tangled hair, pulling all of the strands into alignment.

"So..." she began. "Jin didn't mean to insult you, you know."

I sighed. "I knew that's what this was about," I said.

"It's hard to ignore Jin when he's sad," Botan said.

I looked at her sharply. "He's sad?"

"Uh-huh." She crossed her arms on the lip of the bathtub and rested her shin atop them. Her incredibly blue hair almost hit the water, but luckily she rescued it in time. "Jin doesn't like it when he makes people mad at him. He was only trying to look out for you."

I stared down at the water. My body was only a pale, flesh-colored smudge amid the steam. "I can look out for myself," I said, keeping my voice hard.

"Are you sure?" Botan said.

Glaring didn't even begin to cover it: I shot laser-beams at her. "Look, I get it, I'm a cripple!" I said, water rippling as my body shook with tiny tremors of agitation. "That's nothing new. I'm short and puny and weak and small but that doesn't mean I can't get a dish down from a high shelf, and it doesn't mean that people need to do stuff for me and blow on my drinks or feed me because I'm too thin. I can get around as good as anyone even if I am a little more slow than usual, and I've had twenty years to learn how to take care of myself, and I hate it when people _patronize_ me!"

The only sound in the room came from the sloshing water in the bathtub. Botan stared down at the water as I stared at her, and we did not exchange words as she decided how to respond. When she did respond, the sheer randomness of the topic shocked me into silence.

"When I first started my role as a ferry girl," she said, "I met a little old man who didn't want to get into heaven with my help, even though it was my job to guide him into the light so he would not get lost on the Spirit World's vast plane." She sat up. "'Listen here, ya old blue-hair,'" she said, hunching over and shaking her finger in my face in an accurate mockery of an old person, "'I don't really care if you're a shinigami or a god or whatever. I worked my whole life to get where I am and I ain't stoppin' now, ya hear? So you can take yourself back to wherever it is you came from and I'll find heaven all on my own. Now beat it; scram!'" She giggled at the memory, but then the humor faded. Her eyes went dark. "He wandered for so long that he nearly became a shade," she said, "a human spirit unable to find their final rest. It was only when his wife died and followed me instead of lingering with him that he at last allowed himself to be led into the light."

We said nothing again, and then I broke the silence.

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked.

She put her head back on her arms. "You're like that old man," she said.

I looked down, trying to divert her from the truth. "Wrinkly?" I said, holding up my water-shriveled hands, and she laughed.

"Stubborn," she said. "Very, very stubborn. Dani-san, there's no shame in having help sometimes. Friends help friends. That's just what they do."

I couldn't look at her. "I know," I said. "I just... it didn't feel like friendship between me and Jin. It felt more... paternal. Like I was his child or something."

"Jin just cares about you."

My startled look made her smile. "But we just met," I said.

"Doesn't matter to Jin."

"He can't really care that much," I persisted. "He's just... I'm just short. And frail."

"While that might have something to do with it," Botan said, "I don't think it's the whole story. Jin is the kind of person who protects. It doesn't matter if you're small or big, old or a baby, a new friends or a family member. He's just trying to protect you because you're his new friend, and that makes you precious."

"Then why doesn't he do the same for Yusuke or Genkai, or you, for that matter?" I asked, confused. "Why do I get all the special treatment?"

She laughed. "That's where the 'Dani is tiny' part comes in to play."

I sank into the water until it rose up to my chin. "Told you that was it," I grumbled.

"Yusuke can handle himself," Botan went on. "The two of them have fought together enough for Jin to know that much. Jin also know the same about Genkai. As for Yukina and I... well, he knows we have other protectors."

I thought about it. "Kuwabara and Koenma?" I guessed.

She opened her mouth, eyes bright, and then she shut her mouth again. "Um... yes, that's right," she finally said, laughing with obvious nerves. "I can fight pretty well, too, if you don't mind me bragging."

I frowned in order to conceal a smile._ She was about to mention Hiei over Yukina,_ I thought gleefully. "What are you so nervous about? Are you dating Kurama or something?" I teased in a very dry tone of voice.

"Uh... no..."

"Yusuke?"

She seemed horrified at the prospect. "No!" She shook her head. "Look, the point is that Jin knows Yukina and I are well taken care of. He also knows that Kurama and Kuwabara can take care of themselves, and Kenichi is Genkai and Yusuke's charge. That leaves you all alone, and he wants to make sure you're kept safe, that's all. There's no patronizing at all!"

I sighed as the comedic mood evaporated. "It just feels so..."

Botan reached out and put a hand on my bare shoulder. "Dani-san," she said, looking earnestly into my eyes, "Jin just wants to be your friend. He feels like he needs to protect you not only because you're small, but also because caring for people is an unchangeable part of his person."

"But he was looking at my leg earlier," I said.

She sighed. "Well, can't you see why?"

I bristled, sure she was about to join the Dani-is-helpless camp, but she surprised me.

"It clashes with your personality so much," she said. "You're independent and you hide your weaknesses. The fact that you have such an obvious one confuses him to no end. He told me earlier that he had never met someone who had been crippled from birth. War wounds, yes, but never..." She shook her head again. "Frankly, you confuse him. He has no idea how to act around you. You defy his expectations. He wants to get inside your head and he doesn't know how."

"I never thought of it like that," I said, because truly I had not. "But when you say it like that, I think I get it."

A memory of meeting a blind person came to mind. I remember being torn over how to behave around them. Do I mention it? Not mention it? Treat them like a normal person? Avoid the phrase 'you see' at all costs? Jin was going through the exact same thing, only with me.

The sudden insight made my anger disappear.

"Thanks, Botan," I said. "I get it now."

She beamed at me. "Good. Next time he tries to do things for you, just remember it's because he cares."

"I shall endeavor to be more patient with him," I said, aiming for comedic loftiness.

Botan stood up, bouncing on her heels. "Now, in about an hour Koenma will be here to discuss our next move, so get out of the bath and get ready for a visit."

"Next move?"

"About Seishou's party invitation, silly!" she said. "I'll bring you a little food in your room, too, so go get ready on the double, Dani-san!"

"Um, 'chan.'"

She paused halfway to the door. "What?"

"Dani-chan. Or just 'Dani.' 'San' is so... formal."

Christmas seemed to have come early for the grim reaper. "OK, Dani-chan!" she said, and then she was gone.

* * *

I hadn't thought to take new clothes into the bath with me, so even though they felt grubby on my clean skin I had to reuse my clothes from earlier that day. When I got to my room, however, I was able to get fresh everything—underwear, denim shorts, a new bra, and a pale pink tank top. I let my wet hair fall down my back even though it created a chill, and after I got dressed I just stood there, trying to decide what to do.

"_Still _haven't put all my clothes away," I thought as I looked down at the shopping bags on the ground. I picked up the ones with the underwear in them and carried them over to the closet. My futon currently occupied the bottom shelf, so with a little 'oomf' of effort I set the bag on the next lowest shelf. I would have to stand on my tiptoes to reach it, but...

Turning, I went back for the other bags, but as I picked them up I thought better of putting them in the closet.

"They'll get dirty without a dresser to put them in," I murmured in English, so I just set the bags in front of my bookcase and plopped down in the middle of them. "The underwear can stay in there, though, because I don't want anyone to see it." I took a bag of shirts and began to fold each item the way my mom always did, and then I stacked the shirts (by style and in rainbow order because I am just_ so_ cool like that) on the bottom shelf of the bookcase. "Gotta ask Genkai is she has an extra dresser lying around," I said, and then I found the bag with my two dresses in it. Holding up the yellow one with a raised eyebrow, I remembered Kurama's blush-inducing request ("I hope you'll show me that dress when I return," he had said, and the sheer memory of the way he said it made my mouth grow dry) and muttered: "Maybe a place to hang this up, too."

"What?"

I wheeled around, startled, to find—you guessed it—Jin the windmaster holding a tray of food in one hand and the open door in the other. He had titled his head to the side in confusion, obviously trying to decipher my English words and failing miserably.

"Oh. I was speaking English again," I told him, doing my best to smile. He took the look as an encouragement and grinned right back, walking over to sit next to me on the floor.

"Here," he said, holding out the tray. "Eat, eat, Yukina-san made it for ya!" That was when he noticed all the bags (really, how did he miss them in the first place?). "What are ya up to in here, 'nyway?"

I took the tray from him and settled it across my lap. The food—a long sushi roll, some soup, and a slice of that awesome-looking cake—smelled like heaven and I dug in with gusto. "Unpacking," I said through a full mouth. "Gotta put my clothes away."

"Can I help?" Jin asked eagerly, and then I saw—visibly _saw_—him withdraw a little. Obviously my earlier actions had...

"Yeah, thanks," I said, and he lit up like a firework. "Could you fold my shirt and stuff and put them down there with everything else?"

He grabbed a bag and spilled the contents across his lap. His folding skills, however were far from the level of his ultra-high exuberance, and the shirts ended up as a pile of mishmashed cloth. He didn't color-code, he didn't organize, the seams weren't at all lined up.. and yet he screwed up his face like he was doing a trigonometry problem and he tried, he_ tried,_ man, and I could see it in every tensed up fiber of his muscular body. Fingers that were much to large for such a delicate task fumbled over slippery hems, snaking out of his grasp as if they were alive.

I set the tray aside and grabbed his wrist, stopping him midway through a valiant effort at folding a tank-top in half (well, sort of—it was more in crooked quarters by my estimation). "It's like this," I said, and with a flick of the wrist I showed him how it's done.

"O-oh," he said, eyes lighting up when he saw the neat lines. Then he tried it my way, clumsily at first, but he got the hang of it a few shirts later. The results weren't as polished as my own, but it did cut the mustard quite well enough for my purposes. When he saw me watching him he waved his hands at me. "Eat, eat, I'll take care o' the rest, that I will," he said, and we traded smiles before I went back to eating my food.

Of course, I had never felt quite so awkward before in my life. The sushi roll tasted like sand in my mouth. When Jin started to hum a tuneless little song as he folded, perfectly at ease around me despite our earlier fight, I took a deep breath and watched him out of the corner of my eye. The sight of him folding laundry was arguably the weirdest thing I had seen a Yu Yu Hakusho character do since I got dropped in his world.

"I'm sorry," I said as I ate the last of the sushi. Jin paused, a purple t-shirt held suspended between his outstretched hands, and he stared at me. Wide-open eyes, slightly pursed lips, raised eyebrows... he looked like a kid who had been told the sky was green.

"I, uh, snapped at you earlier. It was wrong at me." I stared down at my empty plate as I spoke, not trusting my expression. "You were only trying to help me."

"Aye, that I was."

I looked at him. He looked at me through sympathetic eyes that I didn't feel deserving of, and then he raised a finger and pointed it straight at my nose.

"Loosen up, Dani-san," he said. "You're too tense, thinkin' everybody's out to getcha or treat ya like a little kid. But they're only tryin' to help because you look like ya need it, which is a right shame all things considered, but it's a shame that ya can't change so ya gotta learn to live with it, that ya do."

I opened my mouth to protest—_I have learned, _I wanted to tell him—but he shot me down with a look and continued speaking.

"And I'll admit right now that I tried to treat ya like a kid, too, before gettin' to know ya better. Now that I do know ya, I know that smotherin' ya makes your hair stand on end, so I won't smother. But I _will _try to do things for ya if it gets to lookin' like ya need the help, because I think I _should _help ya and it'll make me uneasy to _not _help ya."

"People always treat me like I'm made out of glass," I blurted.

"Aye, and maybe ya are," he said.

The oddly cruel words make me jump. "But—"

"But it could be that your body's glass and your spirit's made o' stone," he said, and his words gave me pause. He kept his eyes trained, unblinking, on my face, and for once he was deadly serious. "But even with a spirit o' stone, your body o' glass can still use some help. And gettin' that help doesn't make your spirit seem any less solid."

"Oh," I mumbled, looking down. I had never thought of it like that before.

He reached out a hand and touched my shoulder. "You got pride, Dani-san. It's just that sometimes you defend it even when it's not bein' attacked, ya hear me, now?"

I glanced down at his hand, at the strong fingers and wind-roughened, sun-kissed skin. "You're right," I said, and the hand squeezed for a second before releasing me. I looked up at him and his winning smile. "Wanna make a pact?"

The question caught him off guard. "Uh, sure," he said, rubbing at the back of his neck. His cheeks had, for some inexplicable reason, gone red.

"I'll loosen up and start accepting more help if you stop making comments about my weight."

He relaxed. "Aye, aye, it's done. But can I name a condition?"

"Sure."

One long finger was leveled at my tray of food. "I'll stop mentionin' your skinny bones if you eat that slice o' Yukina's cake," he said, and so I did.

I am happy to report that it was delicious.

* * *

The kitchen seemed smaller with Koenma in it. I'm not sure if that's simply because he's tall, or if that's because his presence—and he most certainly has one—is rather domineering. Still, I felt more than a little claustrophobic as Botan led me and Jin into the kitchen and told us to sit down at the table with the others. Even little Kenichi was there, looking alert and more than a little excited at the prospect of sitting in on official Spirit World business.

"I've been in contact with Kuwabara and Kurama," Koenma said once everyone was seated. "Filled them in on Hogosha's visit and Seishou's invitation." He waved a hand down at the table, and the motion drew my eyes downward. A creamy envelope (the same, I assumed, that Hogosha had ferried to us) lay off to one side; it had been sliced open at the top with a single cut, probably one from a sharp blade. Beside it was a piece of similarly colored paper about the size of standard printer paper. It had been, at one point, folded into thirds. Now, however, it attempted to lay straight except at the places where the creases had been pressed.

Koenma picked the paper up off the table and began to read.

"Dear friends," he said. "It is my distinct pleasure to invite you to a formal gala in honor of the renowned spiritualist known to his followers as Seishou."

I strained my ears when he stopped, thinking there was more, but with a feeling of pronounced anti-climax Koenma put the paper down. Yusuke made a noise that reminded me of a face-planting moment, although no such motion actually occurred.

"Below is the date and place and time," Koenma said. "Dress is formal and RSVP is not mandatory. Refreshments will be served."

"That's it?" Kenichi ventured when no one else spoke.

"There is also a guest list," Koenma said. "It lists Yusuke, Hiei, Kurama, Kuwabara, and myself."

"Phooey," said Jin, resting his arms on the table to he could put his chin on them. "N' here I was, lookin' for a good time and a fight or two, and all I lack is one lousy invitation."

I reached over and patted his head, minding the sharp horn poking through his flaming hair. He grinned in response and batted my hand away, but not before he gave my fingers a light, friendly squeeze. It took most of my willpower not to turn the same color as his mane.

"And then it gives us the right to bring a date," Koenma said, glancing back down at the invitation.

Yusuke snickered. "Well Jin, it looks like you can come along if we make Kurama dress in drag," the spirit detective said. Kenichi, at Yusuke's side, snorted into one grubby hand, and Genkai leaned over to cuff him on the head.

"It's painfully obvious this is a trap," Genkai said as she settled back into her chair. "We go to the party, we leave the book unattended. One of Seishou's minions will come and steal it."

"I agree, but we can't let an opportunity to catch Seishou slip through our fingers," Botan added.

"Yes, he's slippery enough as it is," Koenma said. "The fact that he'll be in a guaranteed location is too good an opportunity to pass up."

"And Seishou likely knows that," Genkai said.

"Which means he's counting on us to leave the book here," said Yusuke, "which means we can't leave it behind because he'll steal it."

"But this Seishou character's a smart one, so won't he figure that that's what we figured?" Jin said. "Why send us an invitation to a party we won't even wanna go to?"

Silence.

"All right, so we send half of us to the party and the rest of us stay here to protect the book," Yusuke said, pounding his fist on the table. "It's settled. We get Seishou and protect the book all at the same time. Two birds with one stone or whatever."

But Genkai shook her head. "Splitting up is not the answer. It took everyone's cooperation to fight him the first time."

"The first time?"

Everyone looked at me, and I put my hand over my mouth. The words had just popped out.

"We went after Seishou after he stole the Book from Spirit World," Koenma said. "We chased him down in Tokyo and pursued him and several of his allies for several days across the country. Eventually we had him cornered and fought him."

"Bastard's cunning," Yusuke grumbled. "Wouldn't mind getting another chance to knock his lights out."

"He opened a tunnel to Demon World before we could truly pin him down," Genkai said.

"And we thought we had him in one place until Hogosha showed up here," Koenma said, voice betraying tension and weariness. "But back to the topic at hand..."

"So it stands that we can neither leave the Book undefended nor pass up a chance to capture Seishou," Genkai said. "We can enlist help from our own allies, but I would rather not involve too many others in this. Lives are at stake and I don't have any intention of putting more on the line."

"There's also the issue of trust." Koenma swept his fingers through his hair. "Paperwork. I don't look forward to more."

"But we need more people!" Yusuke protested. Kenichi, at the point, tugged on Yusuke's sleeve, face pressed into an expression of utmost urgency, but Yusuke just shushed him and went on. "We're stretched too thin to do both jobs—we need at least five to patrol the temple, and everyone here was invited to the party! Jin by himself is not enough backup!"

"And Seishou will be able to judge how many people are at the temple based on the number of us who go to the party," Genkai said in a low voice. "He'll have the upper hand no matter what we do."

"But," Kenichi said, tugging on Yusuke again. "But..."

"But what?!" Yusuke snapped.

"Why don't you just take the Book _with_ you?"

Silence.

"I mean, Seishou knows the Book is here," Kenichi continued, "so why don't you just take it with you to the party and hide it close by? He won't know where to look!"

More silence.

"I mean, think about it!" Kenichi said, kneeling on his chair so he could be a little taller. "We don't even know if Seishou'll show up. He could be luring us into a cage so he could come here and get the Book whenever he wants without us trying to stop 'im. But if we _take _the Book and hide it near the party place, Seishou'll have to leave to come n' get it, but it won't be here! That'll buy us time to escape and rescue the Book again, and if we're lucky Seishou'll still be here at the temple so we can catch 'im."

No one said a word, and Kenichi sank back into his chair with an uncertain glance around the table. Eventually his gaze came to rest on Genkai, and eyes the color of dirty coins grew so large they looked like swimming pools. But Genkai didn't pay attention to his fright and insecurity; rather, she calmed his fears simply by saying: "I knew I picked you for a reason, Kenichi."

The boy lit up from within, a paper lantern of glowing pleasure.

"While I do agree that that plan makes sense," Koenma said, crossing his arms over his chest as he thought, "I have doubts." He raised a hand when Kenichi started to protest. "The Book emits a strong spiritual pressure, and someone of Seishou's skill set will have little trouble tracking it. We will have to find a place local to the party that is also a good place for concealing immense power. The odds of finding such a place are slim."

Genkai snorted. "Are you kidding me? I know every shrine on this continent and every priest besides. Finding such a place is child's play."

"This all sounds way too easy," Yusuke muttered.

"Simplicity rarely sits well with people like us," Genkai agreed. "But I see no other option."

"Then it's settled." Kenichi whooped in joy at the sound of Koenma's words. "Let's say that one week before the party we take the Book to a shrine and seal it inside. We then wait close by until the date of the party, capture Seishou, and..."

"And it's done," Yusuke concluded. He offered Kenichi a high-five, which the young boy accepted with glee. "I can go back to my own life, Seishou will be behind bars, and the Book will be safe at last. It's perfect!"

"With only one problem," Jin said, and everyone stopped smiling when they saw his solemn face.

_Jin, solemn?_ everyone seemed to be thinking. _This certainly can't be good._

"Well, spit it out," Genkai said when Jin did not elaborate.

"You all seem t' think that Seishou'll high-tail it back here once we've been tied up good at his little party, yeah?" the windmaster said.

"Your point?" Yusuke said.

"And you also seem t' think that the main line o' defense will be gone, leavin' the temple all on its own, yeah?"

"Well, yeah, that was kind of the point," Yusuke said.

"And the main line o' defense is you, Kuwabara, Kurama, Hiei, and maybe me if'n things go well," said the windmaster, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed. He glanced at Genkai, but she just shook her head.

"The front lines aren't my neck of the woods anymore," she said.

"Then this lil' problem's about you, too," Jin said, and then, to my eternal surprise, he turned to me. "Dani-san the most, I'm a-thinkin', and Yukina-san, too."

"Get to the point," Koenma snapped.

Jin grinned by way of apology. "Sorry, I'm just a-thinkin' my way through it all, is all, and what I'm thinkin' is this: where will Dani-san and Yukina-san and Genkai all stay durin' the attack on Seishou?"

No one spoke. My blood went cold.

"'Cause, I mean, if they stay here then Seishou'll get 'em," Jin went on. "But they'll just slow us down if they go with us—no offense, Dani-san."

"Oh." I hadn't taken offense at all. "No, I understand. Don't worry."

He beamed at me. "So, ya see the problem? Can't leave 'em here, can't take 'em with us."

Genkai, of course, came up with the perfect answer. "I have a cabin near the coast," she said. "Yukina, Dani, Botan and I can stay there until the heat is off. Plus, there's a boat we can take if we're discovered."

"It's settled," Koenma said. Heads nodded in agreement, and Botan stood up.

"I'll inform Kuwabara and Kurama immediately," the grim reaper said, and in a moment she was gone, out of the door and out of sight. It was only when Jin touched my arm and snapped me out of my shocked daze that I allowed myself to be led out of the kitchen and back toward my bedroom, and when I bid the windmaster goodnight (he gave me one of those awkward am-I-allowed-to-do-this? side-hugs that I can never decipher) I did not fall right to sleep. I tossed, I turned, I thought until my mind ran ragged from the strain of asking, over and over again:

_What will be the consequences of letting the Book slip so neatly through my fingers?_

* * *

_NOTE:_

_This was not going to be an interact-with-Jin-oh-boy chapter when I started writing it, but I suddenly got the idea of him coddling Dani and I just had to try it out. The length of this was also unexpected._

_Also, many of you seemed really concerned that last chapter meant that Hiei was the definite pairing. HE'S TOTALLY NOT! The fic is far from over!_

_The relationship poll will reopen with the posting of chapter 20 (AKA next Tuesday). I plan on opening it in intervals to see how your opinions change alongside the story's progression. Also, given both this and last chapter, I assume many of you will have different opinions than you did the first time. I just wish I could have fit more Kurama and Koenma into here... because as you're probably guessing, the biggest pairing possibilities lie in Jin, Kurama, Hiei, Koenma... and a person you haven't met yet. OH THE SUSPENSE! Who shall it be?! MWA HA HA HA HA!_

_Also: possible multiple alternative endings. You might all get your ways with pairings if I stay focused. =P_

_ATTENTION EVERYONE: I have drawn Dani in both her human and shape-shifting forms! Be warned that I am not a good artist, nor am I very good with criticism (criticism of my writing is fine, but I'm terribly insecure of my artistic (non)abilities). So treat me gently and visit the link on my profile page to see Dani. However, she's not perfectly what I see in my head. I view things through her eyes (yay for a first-person perspective) so I don't actually think about what she looks like too often._

_The amount of reviews you guys leave me is flabbergasting. I had no idea Dani's little jaunt would be at all well-received, so thank you for making me one very, very happy camper. I mean, this whole thing started as a writing practice thing (write at least 3,000 words a week just to keep the writing muscle in shape) and now look at it! I am humbled. Many glorious thanks and cookies (and Yukina's sweet rolls!) go to: Kai-chan94, Reclun, WickedLovelyDream, Anon18 (hope you got home in one piece!), 0nfateswings, Out-Of-Control-Authoress (stalk away!), TwilightFever-FutureCullen, [ ], AkaMizu-Chan, DoilyRox, Wolf-Cry-Night, crossyourteez, WorldsAngel, Blaze, Masuyo Shun, Panda-Chan31, cranberryban, ilovemusicrox12, DarlingSM, rain chant (don't worry about the typos; I knew what you meant, lol), kurochanwithwings (or else? Anything but 'or else!'), heve-chan, ichixichigo, and ShadowFireFox13! I am so grateful to have heard from all of you =]_


	20. Chapter 20: Standing

Future Talk

Chapter 20:

"Standing"

* * *

I groaned when I saw him standing there. "Not you again!"

He smiled. "I thought you'd be happy to see me, Dani."

Scowling didn't even begin to cover it. "So you learned to drop the honorific. Smart."

The Koenma that was not really Koenma shrugged. "I'm afraid I have no idea what you mean."

I stood up, staggering a little on the perfectly formed feet I was at a loss to use. Trees arched high above us, tips swaying gently in a fresh breeze. Once again I found myself dressed in the robe from the hospital, and as I walked among the tall trees (cypress? Aspen? I really couldn't tell) I enjoyed the sensation of pine needles and moss and grass sliding smooth beneath my toes.

"Where the hell are we?" I asked as I wandered among the trees. Koenma trailed after me at a respectful distance, solemn and without expression.

"Your mind," he said. "Or, rather, an image I put there in order to host this conversation with you."

I stopped walking and braced my hand on the trunk of a nearby tree. The bark felt rough beneath my palm. "And who are you, exactly?" I asked, not turning to look at the creature impersonating a god of all creation.

Cruel humor made his voice shudder. "And ruin the fun? I'd rather keep you guessing."

That made me turn around. "Why Koenma?" I snapped. "Why use his face, of all things? Drop the fucking charade and show my your real face!"

I didn't like what happened next. His skin, like the skin of a shedding snake, began to peel itself away from his bones, falling in long ropes to the green ground below. The body grew shorter, more lithe, and his hair retracted and lightened to a sunny blonde. Pretty brown eyes emerged from the mask of skin like rising chocolate suns.

"Hello, Danielle," said my mother. "How's my little girl?"

I went cold all over, inside and out, and I shivered. My stomach started to heave, but I did not vomit.

"Stop it," I hissed from between clenched teeth. "Stop perverting my mom, you bastard."

She smiled, and then with a crack of bone and flesh her features rearranged themselves. Hair grew longer, it reddened, it grew more full. Green eyes blossomed amid pale skin and handsome features, and suddenly I was looking at someone I had not thought to expect.

"Hello, Dani-san," Kurama said in his smooth voice and formal speech. His eyes glittered with good humor and pleasure. "I have missed you."

"Kurama," I said, unable to help myself. But then I remembered that this phantom was not my red-headed friend, and I put my hand over my eyes. "You're not really him," I said.

"You don't know that," he said, and I felt a hand touch my shoulder. "I could be coming to you in a dream to check on you, to make sure you're unhurt and whole." Fingers brushed over the hand I used to cover my face, and then his digits skimmed the tip of my nose. It was not broken in the dream, but that didn't stop Kurama from saying: "I could never approve of what Hiei did to you. I would never hurt, you Dani-san."

"I know that," I mumbled.

"So you trust me, then?"

"I trust Kurama," I said.

"But do you trust _me_?"

I let the hand fall. "You're not Kurama," I said.

"Does it matter?" he said, taking a half-step toward me. His shadow covered my face. "I can help you."

"I don't need help," I said.

"But you do," he said, voice thrumming low and hypnotic. "You can't even walk on your own two feet."

My breathing hitched as he came even nearer to me. "I'm standing now, aren't I?" I murmured. Memories, without provocation, sprang forth, and I found myself thinking of how much I'd been expecting Hiei to help me at learning the day before, the way I'd depended on Genkai to teach me and coddle me. Yukina's helping hand—she'd been waking me up each morning, for Chrissake! What was I, a toddler?—and Kuwabara's overtures of friendship made all my 'efforts' seem half-hearted and paltry by comparison. Then I thought, as I saw the creature wearing his face, of Kurama standing up for me so, so long ago, thinking of the way he had held me to him when Hiei had been out for my blood.

And then I thought about the way I had let so much ride on Kurama's protection, and Jin's words—words of how I could be truly strong despite myself—made shame creep up and inflame my cheeks.

Kurama came close, so close I could feel his breath on my face. Lips lowered so close to mine I could almost taste them, and the thought of kissing Kurama made me warm all over. But as our eyes met in a rush of adrenaline I made myself remember who I was (or was not) looking at.

"I see a little silhouetto of a man," I whispered, thoughts fleeing from my brain.

"What?" Kurama asked, confusion etched all over him.

"Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?" I questioned, and I started singing the words to a song so forceful it made the creature wearing Kurama's beautiful face jump backward in surprise. "Thunderbolts and lightning—very very frightening, me!" My volume increased as I jumped around, waving my arms in time to the music. "Galileo! Galileo! Galileo! Galileo! Galileo, Figaro,

Magnificoh-oh-oh-oh-OH!" With each 'oh' I felt invisible instruments start playing, adding their own voices to the din, and the lyrics that meant nothing whorled around me in a curtain of solitude and force. I could see the face-that-was-not-Kurama's staring at me, mouth working as it spoke, but then the music rose, white-hot and overwhelming, and my sense of sight vanished. Touch and scent followed soon after. Just like I had done to block out Hiei, I used to music to cancel out all other sensation, leaving me alone in a void of my own choosing.

At peace at last when the creature disappeared behind a wall of 'Bohemian Rhapsody,' I slept without disturbance.

* * *

"Need help with breakfast?" I asked as I walked into the kitchen. Yukina, at the sink, turned around with a startled gasp.

"Oh, it's just you," she said, eyes darting in a nervous dance around the kitchen. She was not wearing her typical kimono, I noticed. Rather, she had donned a long, pleated gray skirt and a pale yellow blouse, over which she wore an apron decorated with purple flowers. "Botan left for the Spirit World and everyone else is outside, so I thought I was alone until..." She looked away with a nervous laugh.

"You alright?" I asked as I watched her twist a dish towel between her fingers. There were bags marring the pale flesh beneath her eyes, bags that had not been there the day before.

She sighed. "Yes. I just did not sleep well last night."

My mouth seemed to go dry a lot in this world, and this moment only added to that tally. "A nightmare?" I asked, moving to sit at the table. Early morning light streamed in the window, but no one else was in the room to share the view with, which was weird. Normally everyone was eating at this time; I tended to the be the latest riser of the bunch.

"Why, yes, I did have a nightmare," Yukina said, brow furrowing. "But how could you have known that?"

"I had one, too," I said. "Genkai's also been having bad dreams; she told me so a few days ago."

"What an odd coincidence!" Yukina exclaimed as she busied herself at the pots left simmering on the stove. With care she arranged a breakfast plate which she then carried over to me.

"'Coincidence' might not be the best word," I said as I picked up my chopsticks. "Genkai thinks so, too."

"Is it Seishou trying to scare us?" Yukina asked as she sat down next to me. I thought about that possibility as I began to eat, but eventually I just shook my head.

"No idea," I said at last. "You could be right, but I honestly don't know enough to say so for sure. It sounds probable, though. But if I were you, I'd tell Genkai that you're also having bad dreams. She might be able to piece everything together with more information."

Yukina nodded. "I agree. I will tell her as soon as I can."

The next few minutes passed in a haze of domestic activity. I ate, took my dishes to the sink, and proceeded to help Yukina both wash the breakfast plates and get started on making lunch.

"Can you chop these?" she asked, handing me a knife and a bundle of spring onions. With a nod I took them from her, and I finished mangling two of the long, thin plants before Yukina noticed my horrible skills at dicing and took the job away from me. "On second thought," she said as she set about salvaging my shredded pieces, "I think I can handle this on my own."

Despite the fact that her words were totally good-natured, I found myself the owner of a very embarrassed blush. "Sure," I mumbled.

But Yukina, as empathetic as she is, noticed my discomfort. "I wouldn't want to give away my secret recipes," she said in a low voice, and then she giggled. I smiled back, comforted, and she said: "You can go sit in the courtyard if you want. Yusuke and Jin are trying to teach Kenichi a few new fighting moves, with Genkai overseeing. I doubt they'd mind an audience. "

"Do you want company?" I asked, and she waved a hand at me.

"I'm afraid I won't be very talkative while I cook," she said. "After lunch I will be, though. But for now, go have fun. I'll be here if you need me."

"Thanks," I said, and with one last shared smile I bounced out of the kitchen and onto the temple porch.

The first thing I noticed was Kenichi screaming, help upside down by the ankles by Yusuke and Jin. My first instinct was to rush to his defense, but then I realized that he was screaming things like 'wheeee!' and childish peals of laughter, so I decided that 'helping' him would only ruin the fun.

"Back to work!" Genkai snapped, and her acidic voice made me jump. She was sitting crosslegged to the left of the doorway I was standing in, back pressed up against the wall so she could hold her spine rigidly straight. When she saw me she raised and eyebrow and said: "You're up already?"

I moved to sit next to her, but my posture was not nearly so refined. "Eh, I had some trouble sleeping," I said, stretching my legs out in front of me.

"Another nightmare," she said, and it was not a question.

"Yes."

"Another loved one looking for information?" she asked.

I nodded. "Three of them. But this time the thing changed forms in front of me, and we had a conversation without it trying to stay in character, if you know what I mean. It pretty much stopped pretending to be my loved ones and spoke to me as itself."

She raised an eyebrow.

"It's also learning," I continued. "Last time, it called me 'Dani-san' while in the form of someone who would never use 'san' with me, which gave it away. It didn't make that mistake last night."

"And how did you get out of the dream this time?" she asked. When I looked mystified, she said: "I woke you up last time. No one bothered you today."

I grinned. "Oh, I have Hiei-san to thank for that. I used music like he taught me and drowned the thing out of my head. It wasn't happy, but I got some sleep, at least."

"Music?"

Nodding, I said: "If I meditate and concentrate on music, I can..." Loss of descriptive words made me frown. "Well, I can make it loud enough to overpower everything else. But it's dangerous because I can't really control it, so Hiei said not to use it unless he's around to pull me back out."

"So last night was risky."

"Yes, but I felt that the risks of using the music outweighed the risks of talking with the thing in my dream, whatever it is. If it's even alive like I think it is." My good humor vanished as I remembered my conversation with Yukina. "Yukina had a nightmare too," I said. "She told me so a few minutes ago."

Genkai humphed. "I thought she seemed wound up at breakfast."

"I told her to come and talk to you about it."

"Good. Yukina doesn't burden others with her problems. She wouldn't have said a word without a nudge in the right direction."

I didn't say anything as I saw Jin demonstrate summoning a whirlwind around his pinky finger for an avidly watching Kenichi. The small boy copied the movements like a mirror, but he was unable to create so much as a breeze.

"That's a demon's technique," Genkai grumbled. "It'll take him years to learn." She leaned forward and cupped her hands around her mouth. "Teach him the energy manipulation as well as the motions, you dolt!" she yelled, and Jin looked over at her to tell her that he would. When he saw me, however, he grinned and shot into the air. In less time than it took for me to blink he was on the porch, sitting in front of me with the look a puppy would wear when a playmate came to call.

"G'mornin'!" he said, and Yusuke jogged over to join us.

"About time you woke up," the detective said, and we scowled at one another until Jin pursed his lips and blasted Yusuke with a rush of wind. The detective's carefully gelled hair went everywhere, and in retaliation he reached down and rumpled Jin's fiery mane with both hands.

"Hey!" Kenichi protested from his spot in the courtyard. "What about me?"

"Go back to the boy," Genkai said to Jin and Yusuke. She then spoke to me over the sounds of their protests and requests for a break. "Dani, you need to practice meditation, anyway. Go get your ukelele and meet me back here."

"Yes ma'am," I sighed, and Jin offered a hand to help me up.

"Good luck with your trainin'," he said, eyes twinkling as I let him pull me to my feet.

"Pray that I don't die of exhaustion," I murmured to him, and he tipped me a wink as I went back indoors and started down the hall toward my room. I heard the sounds of everyone yelling and horsing around despite the distance separating us, and those sounds only increased when I started heading back toward the courtyard after grabbing my ukelele. The sight I returned to was an even odder than the one I had walked in on earlier. Kenichi held a large wooden paintbrush in one hand, the end of which had been dripped red ink, and he was chasing after Jin and Yusuke like a miniature Wile E. Coyote from those old roadrunner cartoons. The game, apparently, was to mark either Jin or Yusuke with the paint, but since neither of the two men bore stains on their clothing I assumed Kenichi had not yet succeeded. I watched in amusement as Jin stayed perfectly still with his back turned on Kenichi, whistling slightly through his teeth, and the younger boy did his very best to sneak up on him. But when the kid lunged with a cry of 'gotch!', Jin zoomed straight up into the air and disappeared from sight.

And yes, the look on Kenichi's face was indeed priceless.

"They're training him for speed," Genkai said as she watched me watch them. "Reflexes, too. I'd have you do the same if not for your infirmity."

Her blunt way of putting it gave me pause, but I did not pursue the matter. "We should start walking," I said, heading for the porch steps.

"Why?" said Genkai.

I turned to face her, good leg on the lower step and bad leg resting lightly on the upper. "We're training, right?" I asked, confused.

"I said that already."

"So... the clearing?"

"You'll do it here."

I glanced back at Yusuke, Jin, and Kenichi, taking in their volume level and general distracting-ness. Jin, as if on cue, waved at me, side-stepping Kenichi as he did so. "Um, that might not work," I said.

Her eyes flashed with thunder that did not reflect the aged state of the flesh around them. "And you think you'll always have the luxury of silence when you need to call up this music of yours?" She pulled her pipe out of her shirt (really, did it live there?) and lit it with a match she produced from the depths of her sleeve. Floral-scented smoke made my eyes water as I walked back over to her and slid down the wall, ending up in a sitting position with the ukelele on my lap.

"Play and meditate," Genkai said as I put my cane on the floor at my side. "Pay no attention to the idiots in the courtyard."

"Easier said than done," I muttered in English. Not knowing what to play, I just cycled through my scales as a sort of warm-up until Genkai said: "Quite playing around and actually do something."

"Singing?"

"If it helps."

I let my fingers drift for a bit before I selected something I had never played before. Well, that's not totally true—I had sung along with it hundreds of times, but I had never tried to reproduce it on an instrument, let alone one so limited in range. But the lyrics called to me, and as I played through the chords to familiarize myself with them I sang them in my head. When I felt that I was ready, I let the words go as I remembered my dream from the night before.

"You're not ready for the world outside," I sang. "You keep pretending, but you just can't hide. I know I said that I'd be standing by your side, but I..."

The world fell away as the music washed me clean, and I actually started to perceive a color. The thought was a strange one: music, having a color? But I didn't try to question the melancholy and longingly pale blue as it flowed from me and into the world beyond. The lyrics, however, made my throat tense up, and I felt like crying when I got to the words, "The cries around you, you don't hear at all, 'cause you know I'm here to take that call. So you just lie there when you should be standing tall. But I..."

_I really haven't been trying hard enough_, I thought as I sang the rest._I need to get off my ass and step up my game. I can't rely on everyone else to do things for me, not now, not when the Book is getting taken away. Time to take the initiative, Dani—time to nut up or shut up._

The song ended, and while I was still drifting free in theta I subconsciously began the song again. However, another revolution of the tune was not to be; as soon as I started again I heard the unmistakeable sound of applause—_What the hell? _I thought—filter through my haze of music and shatter my composure from the outside in. I scrambled for the last vestiges of the theta state, but they fled faster than I could follow and I was left stranded in the world of waking thought.

"That was so cool!" Kenichi said, bracing himself on the porch with his arms. His feet, out of my view as they were, were probably a good two feet off the ground. "I knew Genkai wouldn't've bought ya that if you weren't any good!"

"Aye, aye, that was pretty!" Jin said, grinning from ear to ear. "Where'd ya learn t'play like that, Dani-san?"

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, it was fine," he admitted. "What language was that, anyway?"

I was going to tell him when Genkai spoke up. "You idiots weren't supposed to applaud," she grumbled, taking a puff of her pipe.

Jin went sheepish immediately. "Whoops!" he said, rubbing the back of his neck (he used that motion a lot when he was nervous, I was beginning to notice).

I looked down at the ukelele, strengthening my resolve. "Yeah, go back to work," I said. "I need to work, too, and I can't do it with you guys watching."

Jin pulled back a little, perplexed at my sudden seriousness, but Yusuke just shrugged.

"C'mon, Ken," he said, clapping the boy on the shoulder, and Kenichi nodded with a regretful glance in my direction. Jin offered me a tentative smile before jogging after them.

Describing the rest of the afternoon would probably be a little pointless, seeing as how I just did the proverbial 'lather, rinse, repeat' sort of thing until lunch. Theta became harder to enter after I wasted my creative drive and burst of focus on that first song. Luckily, however, Genkai didn't scold me when I tried and failed to enter theta after dozens of attempts, and when the sun was directly overhead and we all got called in by Yukina for lunch she simply said: "Try again after a break."

My fingers stung as if they had been dipped in acid. "Thanks," I told her as we went inside and sat around the kitchen table. Yukina had put food out on large help-yourself platters, and as we all began to serve ourselves the kitchen door opened with a clatter.

We all stared as Hiei came in without a word and sat down in the chair Botan usually occupied, across from me and to my left. Yukina had not prepared a place for him, but she did not make as issue of it as she fetched another plate and set it before the fire demon with naught but a cheerful smile.

"This is rare, Hiei," Genkai said from the table's head.

He made a small noise of assent as he reached out to fill his plate with food. I tried not to appear too interested as I tasted my own portion, because the sight of Hiei doing something as mundane as eating was incredibly strange. No one else seemed concerned, however, and when Jin started talking to me I tried to let the casual atmosphere take me along for the ride.

Hiei, however, was having none of that.

"You used the music without me," Hiei said, interrupting me as I was showing an interested Kenichi how to play a chord on the ukelele. I looked up at him and brushed my hair out of my eyes, confused until I remembered my dream and how I'd gotten out of it. I let Kenichi take the instrument with the instructions to practice for a moment.

"I didn't see any other way out," I told him, and I noticed, then, that everyone was listening to us talk.

"You should have called for me," he said.

"And you would have heard?" I asked, shaking my head.

"Yes," he said.

"Really?" I said. "Oh, sorry, I'll remember that next time." I turned back to Kenichi and moved his fingers into a better position; they had drifted a little bit during my absence. "Make sure to keep your hands steady," I said.

"Don't ignore me, Dani," Hiei snapped.

"I wasn't ignoring you, Hiei-san," I said, taking care to sound sincere and polite. "I mean it when I say that I will call for you when the need arises. Thank you for taking care of me."

He stared at me, unreadable eyes narrowed in scrutiny. I went back to Kenichi as conversation picked back up, but Jin—who was sitting on my other side—tapped me on the shoulder.

"I don't get it," he said, voice lowered to a whisper.

"Don't get what?"

"What just happened. Hiei's mad, trying t'coddle ya, and you're... well, you're takin' it a right sight better n' ya did with me, that's for certain."

I smiled at him. "You told me to mellow out, remember? This is me being mellow. I agreed to his terms and that's that. No conflict, no anger, no nothing."

Jin didn't buy it, if the look on his face was any indication, but he popped a bite of food into his mouth without further questioning.

I was not, however, nearly as calm as I let on.

_What, does Hiei sit there and read my mind as I sleep? _I thought, with venom. _How the hell did he know I sued the music, anyway? And_ c_all for him? Ha! As if! He's getting mad at me for saving my own life! That jerk. I bet he wanted me to try and fail just so he could swoop in and rescue me again. He's such a sadist! _

My nose tickled, suddenly, and I reached up to rub it. The contact hurt the still-broken feature, but when I stopped mid-rub it was not out of a sense of discomfort. Slowly, very slowly, I looked across the table. Hiei was staring at me. We traded eye-contact for about a minute.

"I would appreciate, Hiei-san, if you would not do that," I murmured as the tickle-itch skittered across my brain, turning over my thoughts the way a stream tosses a pebble. I was sure he could hear me despite my low volume.

_I'll get out when you make me get out,_ he replied, his voice echoing like an avalanche in my head.

_I don't have anything to prove to you, _I shot back.

_You do_, he said. _Prove to me that last night wasn't so dangerous I shouldn't just kill you now to save the dream-demon the effort._

Our eyes bored into one another's, trading looks that could melt steel._ What's this? _I thought, coating my words in syrupy sweetness. _Hiei, caring for me? If I didn't know any better I'd think you were worried for my safety. Aw, how sweet._

The most interesting part of his subsequent response was the lack of one.

What the hell did _that_ mean?

Jin—who had been talking to me without my notice—stopped. He looked at the fire demon and frowned. "Am I missin' somethin'?"

Hiei stared at Jin for a moment before looking back at me. "No," he said.

The tickle did not go away; if I had to guess, I'd say it only got worse. In retaliation, I took a deep breath and started humming. Kenichi, beside me, looked up at my face and tilted his head to the side in confusion.

"You OK?" he asked.

"I'll be fine," I answered through gritted teeth, and I resumed my humming. It was just the intense part of the William Tell Overture, but with it I was able to successfully stop thinking long enough to render Hiei's probe useless (I couldn't drive him out, of course, but I was at least able to seal my thoughts away and out of his reach behind a musical barrier). When I finished the song I opened my eyes, eyes I hadn't realized I closed. Most everyone (sans Genkai, of course) was glancing between Hiei and I, perplexed.

I smiled, trying to appear lighthearted and cheeky. "Did I pass the test?"

Hiei glowered. "That wasn't a test."

"Oh. My mistake."

He opened his mouth. Closed it. His head cocked backward, eyes staring somewhere to his left, and then he said: "We have another visitor."

Insta-tension! The guys jumped up; Yukina gasped and dropped a plate with a crash of breaking china; Genkai stiffened; I froze in fear. But then Hiei chuckled darkly and looked right at Yusuke.

"She's angry," he said.

Silence, and then the color drained from the detective's face. "Oh no," he said, brown eyes opening wide.

"Go meet her," Hiei said, and he sat down and resumed eating. Yusuke swore a few times and ran his fingers through his hair.

"What's going on?" I whispered, leaning closer to Jin.

"Beats the heck outta me," he whispered back.

Yusuke overheard us. "My girlfriend's here," he moaned, and then he walked out of the kitchen with slumped shoulders.

* * *

Where do I begin with Keiko?

The first thing you notice about Keiko is that she's pretty, but not crazily so, even though she's got eyes of the most expressive brown you've ever seen. There are these greeny-gold highlights around her iris that pick up light and all but juggle with it, and then there's this ring around the edge that looks like mahogany or teak or something. The middle is almost honey colored. Her skin's nice, too, smooth and kissed ever so slightly by the sun. She's got a body with just enough curve to be enticing, but not so much that it's distracting. But her facial features, when studied closely, aren't exactly model material (more girl-next-door than anything) although her eyes make up for it.

Still, when seen next to demons like Yukina and Hiei and Jin, Keiko is undeniably human, and all of her pretty features put together are overshadowed quite expertly by the sheer volume of her voice.

Naturally, when Yusuke left to go meet Keiko on the temple steps, everyone else followed (Genkai said something about needing popcorn for the show, and I'm sure the only reason Hiei went was to see his rival get creamed by a mere woman, or something). We all clustered together on the porch while Yusuke slouched toward the stairs, but before he got there a head of thick brown hair worn to its owner's elbows bounced into view.

"Hey, Keiko," Yusuke said, raising a hand in greeting. The girl in question stalked toward him, glowering with a look that could rival even Hiei's, and when Yusuke opened his arms for a hug she wheeled back and let a slap fly free. It connected with Yusuke's cheek with a sound like a beaver's tail hitting the surface of a lake, and not for the first time I wondered why he didn't just dodge her. I mean, he could dodge DEMONS—so why not little old Keiko?

"Yusuke!" she snarled as he staggered back, clutching his cheek in one hand. "First you skip out on out anniversary dinner to go chase after some guy with a bad dye-job—"

"Official Spirit World business, Keiko, you know that—"

"—and then you disappear for a week without so much as a call to let me know you're alive!" she finished, continuing over Yusuke as if he had not opened his mouth. "And don't feed me that line about 'official Spirit World' business, either, because you and I both know that you don't work for them any more, and—"

She continued on in this vein for some time, and when her ire cooled and she had succeeded in making Yusuke stare shame-faced at the ground, her eyes lifted to the porch and the gaggle of humans and demons watching her. Cheeks went pink with embarrassment; it was obvious to me that Keiko had not wanted an audience.

"'ello!" Jin called to her, waving. "You sure beat him down what good, Keiko-san!"

"I didn't realize you were all watching," she said, regaining her composure with a deep breath.

Yukina moved forward and jogged down the porch. When Keiko saw the ice apparition her eyes lit up and she side-stepped Yusuke to meet the demon halfway. The pair embraced, smiling at each other the way only old friends do.

"It is wonderful to see you again," Yukina said, a bit breathless.

"I missed you too, Yukina-chan!" Keiko said. She peered around Yukina to look at the porch once more. "Hello Genkai-san, Jin-san, Hiei-san." Her eyes went down the line of us, but her welcoming smile faded a little when she saw me.

"Oh, Keiko-san, that's Dani-san," Yukina said. "She is staying with us for the time being."

"Good to meet you," I called, smiling. She smiled back, but warily, and I remembered all the crap Yusuke had put her through over the years. Anyone new she would likely be reserved around, considering that they could be a demon bent on world domination or something.

"We were just eating lunch when Hiei sensed you coming," Yukina said. "Are you hungry? There's plenty of food."

"I've been on a train since before the sun came up," Keiko said, and I noticed that she had a backpack hanging on one shoulder. She was staying at the temple, it seemed. "I'm starving." Another glare got cast in Yusuke's direction. "I'll deal with_ you_ later."

"Come in and eat and we can catch up," Yukina exclaimed. She took the taller girl by the hand and tugged her toward the porch. With much chatter the pair breezed past us and went indoors, and—without much choice in the matter—we all followed after.

* * *

I don't really know what Yukina and Keiko got up to that day, because lunch ended and Genkai stole me in order to train.

"I see you're not quite good enough to handle distractions," she said as she led me to a stretch of porch on the temple's deserted side. "I shouldnt' have expected so much from you so soon."

My temper flared, but I pulled it back in with a few deep breaths and a very intense hand-clenching session (it's a wonder my cane hadn't been pulverized by that point).

"Just practice entering and exiting theta by yourself," she said as I settled down. My legs hung over the porch's edge, swinging free and comfortable. Coincidentally, she had taken me to the area of porch just next to the small monk statue hidden in its patch of grass. I had nearly forgotten about it. "I'll be back in a few hours. And _don't_ goof off. I'll know if you do."

"Yes ma'am," I said as she went back inside via a door positioned right behind me, and then I looked at the statue. "Hello, Mr. Monk," I cooed. "Miss me? Yes, I'll bet you do!"

The door clattered open. "No goofing off!" Genkai snapped, and I immediately began a very mechanical rendition of 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' with a please-don't-kill-me smile on my face.

I won't bore you with lengthy paragraphs about my mediation. Hours seemed to pass. I drifted in and out of theta with varying degrees of success until Genkai made another appearance. The sound of the door opening made me jump so badly I nearly dropped the ukelele.

"Keep going," she told me. I yawned, unable to help it, and she scowled. "If you know what's good for you, you won't fall asleep while Hiei's here."

I stiffened. "He's coming here?" I asked, and she nodded. Right on cue, I heard a small thump from in front of me, and when I turned I found Hiei standing next to the monk.

"Well, get on with it," Genkai said, and I started playing as I stared at Hiei through lowered eyes. I was a bit taller than him given my elevated perch on the porch, but I still got the feeling he was looking down on me with those incredible eyes of his.

"Keep me out," he said, and without warning his mind slammed into mine. I hadn't even started playing a real song yet, and with a cry I felt him burrow deep into me, looking at my memories with the critical gaze of a microscope. Desperately I tried to wrench him away from my memory of my first kiss, the tantrum I threw as an eight-year-old when my mother told me I couldn't attend sleep-away camp, the memory of placing my hands on the keys of a piano for the very first time. He dwelt on the resulting strain of music for a long time, and with mental hands shaking from exhaustion and embarrassment I grabbed at that music. I pulled it out of the memory and threw it over his presence like a blanket, and for a moment I became blissfully unaware of him or my own memories. But then he burst through the haze of notes the way light bursts through cloud, and I was drowning in the camping trip with my father, memories of using a sound mixer to DJ a party with remixes of my favorite songs, the joy I felt when I got my first full-sized guitar and had trouble wrapping my ten-year-old hands around its neck.

_Push me out!_ Hiei's voice screamed as he shoved the memory of being teased on a playground at me. He started to withdraw the painful memory after a few seconds, but I clung to it and held it close, because it wasn't over yet.

_It's not done,_ I thought to him. _It's not done! Let me watch it finish!_ From the edges of my memory-vision I saw a tall girl with short blonde hair leap to my defense, punch one of the teasing children square in the face, and then chase the rest of them off with a barrage of thrown rocks.

_Lauren, _I thought as her phantom approached the small, pitiful, and sobbing me-of-the-past. With dirty hands she helped me up and brushed me off, and when she wiped the tears from my cheeks she left smears of dirt in in her wake.

_Don't cry, _she told me. _Stand up for yourself. They'll never leave you alone if you just let 'em get away with that stuff. _She grinned, revealing a missing front tooth and a smile so genuine it could put the pope to shame.

_But I can't run and play with them_, said the child-me, crying all the while.

_So there must be something else you can do,_ she said.

_And I don't have any friends at all_, I sniffed.

_I'll be your friend, _she said. _You can count on me!_ _My mommy sings this to me when I'm sad and need her. Here, listen!_

And then she sang to me in a voice that couldn't find a tune or a tempo or a rhythm, but one that could find all the emotion and sincerity in the universe and force it to hang on every last syllable._ If you're lost you can look and you will find me,_ she warbled, _time after time. If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting, time after time._

I knew that song, and the little me sang along. Even as a kid I could carry a tune, and although I was weak and hiccupy from crying I managed to get the words out. We sang the chorus together again, and then a third time, and her eyes lit up when we stopped singing.

_You can do music!_ she exclaimed. _See, you don't need those bozos! We've got each other. _

The little me smiled at her tentatively, and the memory faded into darkness. But the sound of our young voice stayed with me, and I dragged the strain of 'Time After Time' out of the memory and into my head. I made it louder, used it to push Hiei's all-seeing eyes away, and with the strength of Lauren's friendship backing me I was able, for a time, to have some peace.

* * *

I woke up on my back. Genkai was staring down at me, pipe between her teeth.

"You're lucky Hiei was here again," she said. "You went much too deep for your experience level."

"How long was I out?" I asked woozily, putting my hand to my head as I sat up. But the world spun, so I laid back down.

"Half an hour. He was only in your head for a few seconds."

"Seconds? It felt like hours."

She snorted, smoke streaming from her nose and straight into my face. I coughed.

"He went at you almost full force," she said. "I told him to go slow, but I think you made him mad after what happened at lunch." When I scowled and started to protest, she just kept talking. "Go back to your room and rest. I think you've done enough today."

"I can keep going," I said, but when I tried to sit up again my head started to spin.

Genkai shook her head. "Hiei dragged painful memories out of you, it seems," she said. "You're not going to be physically or emotionally capable of mediating successfully for at least a day. Take a nap and we'll try again later if you're up for it."

"Thanks," I said, and I very, very, carefully made it to my feet. Genkai actually lent a helping hand and carried my ukelele for me as she led us back to my room, and when I got there I laid down on my futon with a sigh.

"I'll send someone by to get you for dinner," she said. Then she was gone.

And a few seconds after that, I was asleep.

* * *

I woke up some time later, but I lacked a way to tell what time it really was. Sitting up in bed, I threw the covers off of myself and swept my fingers through my hair. However, rather than go for Genkai and try to repeat today's mishap of a training session, I set out to do what I should have done days before.

I tried to shapeshift.

"OK, Dani, let's start small," I muttered as I got the hand mirror off of my shelf. "Keiko. Let's try to turn into Keiko. She's the least crazy looking of the entire bunch." I set the mirror across my knees and stared into it, drawing up a mental image of Keiko as I did and concentrating on making myself look like her.

Nothing happened.

_Change, change, change, change, change, _I thought, feverishly willingly myself to morph and twist the way I had seen the shapeshifter change back in the Demon World clearing. The thought turned into a verbal command: "Change, change, change, change, _change_!"

Still, nothing.

_Maybe I'm going about this in the wrong way,_ I thought. _Meditation might help. _So I picked up the ukelele and entered a shaky sort of theta, but when I started to consciously try to do things I would wake up from my already precarious theta state and send all my hard work down the tube.

"This sucks," I moaned, putting the mirror aside and laying back so I could stare forlornly at the ceiling. I started to reach up and thread my hands into my hair like I usually did when I got nervous, but I paused with the hand hovering just above my hand. I stared at it, thinking, and then I put the hand back down.

"When I look at my hand and think 'move,'" I said out loud in English, twitching my fingers against the futon, "nothing happens. But when I don't think and I just let it move, it moves. Maybe shapeshifting works the same way. Maybe thinking about it only hinders the process."

And so I tried not to think about it. Lying there, feeling the futon cushioning my every muscle, I just let myself _be_ with the memory of Keiko's face hovering inside my head. Her sunkissed skin, her expressive eyes, her full lips... Eventually my skin started to tingle, although that could have been the result of my limbs falling asleep or my blood pooling downward thanks to gravity's unavoidable grasp, and when the tingling went away I sat up and took a glance at the mirror.

Weirdly enough, I thought I saw a bit of a change, but Keiko and I had such similar hair colors that I could just have been mistaking a change, or I could have just been overly hopeful and seeing something that really wasn't there. The color-change of my skin wasn't such a success, either—_maybe_ there was a bit of tanning going on that wasn't normally there, but only someone who made a habit of studying my skin could have been sure. And her eyes... I didn't have a good mental image of them, not really, because they were so normal, so human, and they faded into the background when paired with eyes like Kurama's, Yukina's, Hiei's, Jin's...

My mind went blank as I realized exactly what I needed to do: focus on something outlandish, something that stood out in my mind and something that wouldn't get mixed up with the day-to-day features I had seen every day since I was born. Jin's eyes popped up first, but when I tried to see them I found that I was not yet familiar enough with them to use their likeness properly. Kurama's gorgeous green eyes then sprang to the forefront of the list, because I knew the line of his thick lashes and the deep ring around the edge of his iris that made their color so striking, and I knew the way his skin looked around those eyes and the way his high cheekbones made them stand out so much, and...

But then I saw something else: a red like cherries set in tanned skin, a bored expression that made me want to reach out and pinch him into waking up, that derisive sparkle that made my skin buckle and twist in an effort to measure up...

Hiei's eyes were just so much more alien than Kurama's, weren't they? And that made them so much more memorable, didn't it?

But I didn't want to use Hiei's eyes, not really: I wanted to use Kurama's. But as I emptied my head and tried to fill the space with forest green and softness, visions of maraschino hostility chased the cool green away.

"Goddamn it," I hissed from between clenched teeth when the image of Hiei's eyes just wouldn't go away. My fingernails bit into my palms. "Go _away_, damn you!"

The pain in my palms—coupled with my frustration and anger and disappointment—made the image in my head _snap_ into place, and suddenly my eyes were on fire. I rocked back with a screech and buried my face into my pillow, but by then the pain had vanished. Not daring to believe what may or may not have happened, I scrambled for the mirror at my side. The metal felt cool beneath my heated skin and shaking fingers.

But I couldn't bring myself to look.

"This is so stupid, Dani," I hissed to myself as I hesitated with a rapidly pounding pulse. "This is what you wanted. You made your bed, now lie in it!"

So I held up the mirror.

Candy apple red set in huge sockets stared back at me.

And, of course, that moment happened to coincide with Yukina knocking on my door, wondering whether or not I'd be OK with having salmon for dinner.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_How the hell is Dani gonna get herself out of this one? Beats the heck out of me!_

_Holy Cow, a lot happened in this chapter. Another horrible dream, Keiko showing up, the first shapeshift... I really wanted to have her try and fail at the shapeshifting the first few times, but then I realized that it was a built-in feature of her body and was therefore a natural part of her being, not a learned technique. So, having her be totally inept at it would actually be less realistic than if she were able to do it but without much control or really even knowing exactly what she did in order to do it. Does that make sense? It does in my head. Really convoluted sentences, there. Whoops._

_The only real reason I brought in Keiko was so Dani could use her as shapeshifting practice. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a Keiko hater, but she doesn't have much to do with this story. _

"_Bohemian Rhapsody" is by the band Queen, the immortal and the iconic and the wonderful. It seemed like the best song to use to drive the dream-creature away. The other song I used is from the musical episode of the AWESOME television series Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The episode is titled "Once More, With Feeling," and the song simply entitled "Standing." "Time After Time" is by Cyndi Lauper. I also referenced the finale of the William Tell Overture, which, if you don't know it, you should Google. Odds are you've heard it before._

_I mentioned Lauren, Dani's childhood friend, in chapter 18. While writing this chapter, I actually got an idea about how I could use her in a spin-off... Oh dear. Stop me now before the plot-bunnies start multiplying._

_Also: I started a new fic with a KUWABARA X OC pairing. How's that for unexpected? Check it out, for me, please?_

_Also x2: NEW PIC OF DANI ON MY DEVIANTART. Link's on my profile =P_

_Also x3: THE POLL IS OPEN AGAIN! Take a sec to vote, pretty please?!_

_And, as always, a shout-out to my loverly reviewers! Kai-Chan94, Robyn the Perpetually 15, Reclun, colbub, Kaiya's Watergarden, 0nfateswings, rain chant, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, DoilyRox, crossyourteez, ilovemusicrox12, AkaMizu-chan, chocolateluvr13, Wolf-Cry-Night, WickedLovelyDream, Masuyo Shun, ichixichigo, Anon 18, heve-chan, ShadowFireFox13, and the Under-Cover Fangirl! You are all beautiful people!_


	21. Chapter 21: Deep

Future Talk

Chapter 21:

"Deep"

* * *

Hearts are fun. They beat no matter how you're feeling—if you feel like quitting, like dying, your heart just plods along, reminding you that life does indeed go on through bad times as well as good. It doesn't let feelings of inadequacy or fear stop it from doing it's job (because that's what cholesterol is for). True to that old country song, hearts 'just keep rolling along.'

But my heart, when Yukina knocked on the door, stopped just like it _wasn't_ supposed to. I'm still not sure if I mean that metaphorically. I don't think I've ever been that scared before in my life, and as I dove back under the covers of my futon and pulled them over my face I yelled: "I'm not feeling well, Yukina-san!"

The door opened with a squeak. She must have seen me in my bed before speaking her next line, because otherwise her words did not make much sense. "Oh, I'm sorry Dani-san, I didn't know you were napping..." She paused. "Why are you napping with the lights on?"

I blinked furiously into the darkness beneath the covers. My eyes felt much too large, like they were closer to my temples than normal, and that was not a good thing. "Oh, I fell asleep with them on," I said, trying not to sound nervous when I chuckled and investigated my face's changes with my fingers. "Could you turn them off for me?"

I heard her take a step closer. "Dani-san, you're acting strange," she said. "Are you hurt?"

"Nope, just a bit tired." I forced out a sound that I hoped seemed like a yawn. "Well, goodnight."

"You aren't hungry?" she asked, and I heard her kneel at my side. A feather-light touch on my shoulder let me know how close she really was. "Genkai said you probably would be when you woke up, and it's dinner time right now."

I laughed again. "Oh, um, I'm fine, really. I just need a nap, that's all. "

She hesitated. My heart start beating like I'd run a marathon. "If you're sure," she said at last, and I gave her my thanks as she left the room and shut the door behind her.

I sat up as soon as she was gone, throwing the covers aside as I found myself in total darkness. I hadn't heard her turn off the light, but as I crawled across the room and flipped it back on I tried not to dwell on that inconsistency. "Gotta change back," I whispered to myself as I settled back down on the futon. Picking up the mirror, I studied my reflection and refused to think about how incredibly weird I looked with Hiei's eye set in my pale face. Even though my eyes normally posed as my face's dominant set of features, now they looked as large as those alien masks littering costume stores around Halloween. The eyes bled too much onto my forehead and cheeks, bugging out in a way that Hiei's most certainly did not.

_So I managed to change my face but I didn't even do it right, _I thought to myself. _Sure, I got the color down pretty well, but the shape is _way _off._

Looking at the eyes creeped me out, so I closed them, cleared my head, and conjured up an image of my normal features.

_You can do this, _I told myself as I inhaled. _It'll be just like changing in the first place. _

Many moments of deep breathing and concentration later, I felt the beginnings of a wave of needle-pricks trickle across my skin. But the pain of it threw me off balance, and I had to start anew a few more times before I was able to push past the discomfort and willingly subject myself to the pain of a transformation. I again found myself on fire, but I stifled any cries of discomfort as I clawed at my face in an attempt to quiet the sensations. I bumped my broken nose a little bit too hard, however, and couldn't keep my reaction to the combined sensations bottled up inside.

"Fuck!" I half-screamed into my hands, and suddenly my bedroom door flew open.

"Dani-san, I thought you were napping!" came the sound of Yukina's voice, and I froze. "Why did you turn the lights back on? And why is your face covered?" Her voice echoed with innocent accusations.

I started to lower my hands to talk to her, but then I stopped. _Are my eyes back to normal?_ I asked myself, blinking rapidly behind the shield of my fingers. I couldn't feel anything wrong with them (the burning had already gone away) but still, with me being so new to this I was not going to trust myself to lower those hands and show a potential disaster to one of my biggest allies.

"Dani-san?" Yukina asked, and then she was next to me. She grabbed my wrists in her cool fingers and tried to pull my hands away, but I tensed my muscles as hard as I could and would not budge.

_Leave to go get someone, _I silently willed her. _Go so I can check my face in the mirror. Go!_

"Speak to me, Dani-san, please!" Yukina urged, tugging again, and she proved strong enough to move me just enough for her to catch sight of my face. My blood went cold as I squeezed my eyes shut, but it was too late: Yukina gasped and scooted away.

"What's wrong with your eyes?" she asked, voice frantic.

_Crap, I guess they _didn't_ go back to normal,_ I thought, mind racing. I decided to play the clueless-and-pitiable card, so my response ran along the lines of: "They're burning, Yukina-san! I don't know why but they're burning so bad!" I tried to make my voice break on a few of the syllables, and I succeeded fairly well (it wasn't too hard considering my still-smarting nose). She reached out to touch me again, laying her fingers against my sweaty brow. I hoped that she perceived the sweat to be a product of pain and not nerves, which is what it really should have been attributed to.

"I'll heal you," she said in a firm voice, and then she paused. "May I see your face?"

I let my fingers slide hesitantly apart so she could see my features peeking out between them. When I caught sight of her I realized that her face had paled considerably, and I quickly closed my fingers.

"On second thought, I will go find Genkai," Yukina said, and she took her hand away as she stood up and went to the door. She moved quickly but did not quite run, and her jaw was set in such a way that I knew she was resolute on helping me.

But I didn't need help, not from her, and the second she disappeared around the corner I pulled the mirror onto my lap. The cause of Yukina's consternation was apparent in a millisecond. Somehow I had managed to correct the shape of my eyes that second time around, but I had gotten the color of them completely wrong. Red eyes—red like cherries or candied apples or Hiei's eyes—without the white of a schlera surrounding them or a pupil occupying the middle glared back, and I felt revulsion make my stomach turn. Still, I tried not to dwell on the horrible sight as I took a deep breath and called up an image of the family portrait on Mom's dresser back home. She had had me pose for the picture the summer before I went off to my second year of college. I could see my eyes very well using that image as a base, and I envisioned the green flecks around my pupils and the brown sea those flecks swam in as I concentrated, banishing thoughts of other faces from my head...

A thunderstorm of footsteps poured into my room just as the burning took over again, and when I cried out in intense discomfort I heard Yukina say: "Her eyes were red everywhere, with no white in them and no pupil, and she said she was in pain before I left."

"She's still in pain, by the looks of things," I heard Genkai intone with her scratchy voice as I gasped a little for air. Footsteps echoed across the floor. "Let me look, Dani." Cloth rustled as the psychic knelt at my side.

I didn't move, unsure as the pain faded if I was ready to be seen.

"Dani. Let me look," came Genkai's commanding voice.

Still, I hesitated.

She sighed. "Jin. Come here."

"Righty, then," said the wind apparition, and my hair moved as a slight breeze caressed my skin. "Dani-san," Jin said in a low, sweet voice from right in front of me, strong hands with such long fingers easily encircling my wrists all the way around, and then some. I jumped at the sudden contact and words, not having heard him move. "Dani-san, you gotta let us take a look at ya, t' make sure you're not hurtin' anywhere." He tugged on my arms, but gently. "Don't make me force ya t' give us a peek. I don't wanna hurt ya."

"No, it's..." I said, and with one last-ditch effort I cleared my head, screwed my eyes shut, and let memories of looking at myself in a mirror, in the reflection of a pond, in photographs and Facebook snapshots, wash me over.

"Dani," Jin said, dropping the honorific as he gave me a light shake. I snapped out of my haze. "Dani, drop your hands n' let us look!" He applied light pressure on my wrists and slowly lowered them, but my eyes were screwed up tight. "Open up," Jin said, and after taking a deep, calming breath I slowly cracked my eyes.

Jin's face was only a few inches from mine since he was sitting on the futon in front of me, and I tried not to blush as we looked at one another. I could see all of his pores, his wide blue eyes with their silvery center and deep blue edges, and the way his red hair played those eyes up and made them sparkle. He stared me straight in the face and his mouth drifted open slowly, so slowly, and the fangirl in me gave a little squeal of surprised delight when I caught sight of his pointed eyeteeth.

The delight disappeared when he whispered: "What the hell is that?"

_I didn't make it,_ I told myself, and I felt my throat swell with tears of embarrassment, shame, and aimed-at-my-failure rage_. I didn't make it. I couldn't change back._

Jin let me lower my hands to my lap, but he did not let me go. The others crowded in close behind him, and I cast my eyes to the side so I would not have to look at the faces of Yusuke, Yukina, Genkai, Keiko, and Kenichi. Yusuke bore the horrified yet bewitched expression suited to someone watching a car accident in slow motion.

"Why are her eyes like that?" Kenichi whispered, tugging on Yusuke's sleeve.

"Shut up, squirt," Yusuke hissed, plopping down next to Jin so he could see better. Kenichi leaned on the detective's back, eyes wide and fascinated. Yukina and Keiko stood behind them, huddled together as they watched me through frightened eyes.

"What's happening to me?" I choked out, pleased to note that I sounded just as scared as one should when undergoing an unknown physical mutation.

"Your eyes are red," Yukina said, trying to sound soothing.

_Time to play dumb again._ "Like I'm drunk or something?"

"No, they're red... everywhere," she said. "Your iris, in the whites, the pupils..."

"Why does it hurt so much?" I murmured, trying to look bamboozled as well as petrified, and then Keiko spoke. I could have kissed her, I was so happy to hear the news she delivered.

"Look, they're getting better!" Keiko said, putting one hand on Jin's shoulder and the other on Yusuke's so she could lean in close between the pair. I got quite the peek down her blouse, as did Jin if his resulting blush was any indication of Keiko's close proximity. Yusuke just grinned, pleased with this development.

"Good eyes, Keiko!" he said, smiling up at his girlfriend while he looked mostly at her breasts. Keiko cuffed him on the head as she pushed away, and when he said 'Hey!' in protest she just said: "I wouldn't push it, Yusuke."

"The red is fading in splotches," Yukina said, sounding excited. "I can see some white again! Oh, and a little iris, too!"

"Can you see?" Genkai said.

"Yes," I said, blinking rapidly. I couldn't feel anything abnormal going on with my eyes, but I decided to take everyone else's word for it.

"When did this start, and what happened?" Genkai asked. The others went very quiet, and I jumped a bit when Jin reached out and took one of my hands into his own. I looked at him in surprise as he gave my fingers a squeeze and then set our joined hands lightly atop my knee. He did not pull away.

"Your eyes are clearin' up," he said, smiling at me with his own eyes that seemed slightly too melancholy. "It's like someone's dabbin' up some spilled paint with a sponge, little by little. You'll be back t' normal soon, that ya will."

I smiled back at him, a little uncomfortable with the attention but pleased all the same. "I woke up when Yukina came in," I said, addressing Genkai but hardly able to look away from Jin. My mind had a bit of trouble concocting a story on the fly, but one spilled out just the same. "I tried opening my eyes, but they started hurting. I thought it would go away, but when it didn't I turned on the light and got the mirror to see what was wrong." I gestured at the object lying on the futon with the hand Jin had no usurped.

"Were the eyes red when you looked the first time?" Genkai asked.

I shook my head. "They just started hurting even worse. Then the pain got bad and Yukina heard me and came back in."

Genkai turned her head sharply, addressing the ice apparition in question. "And were they red then?"

Yukina nodded. "It was a very vibrant color; not something I could miss."

"And was your vision interrupted at any time?" Genkai asked me.

I shook my head. "I could see just fine."

"They're back t'normal now, by the way," Jin said, and he leaned in closer to my face. "Your pupils are cloudy, though." He looked and Genkai. "What could have caused this, do ya think?"

"I'm not sure," she said. "Yukina?"

"I am an experienced healer, but I am not familiar with many diseases or their causes," she said, and I think I caught a bit of regret dancing in her delicate features. "Physical wounds are more my forte."

Genkai seemed pensive. "Kurama is versed in healing sickness," the psychic said, more to herself than the rest of us, I think. "I'll have Botan contact him tomorrow."

"Aye, we should do that," Jin said, squeezing my hand again. My smaller limb looked lost, covered as it was by his palm. He looked at me with a happy expression. "The clouds are gone. Are ya hungry?"

"A bit," I said, confused by his sudden switch to nonchalance. I looked to Yukina. "I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier. I was just confused with what happened, and everything..."

She smiled. "I understand. There is food waiting for you in the kitchen if you would like to eat something."

Jin's grin got wider as he picked up my cane. It had been lying on the floor next to the futon; with a little bounce of happiness he took my hand and wrapped it around the wooden stick. "Let's get some food into ya," he said, ears twitching once or twice, and he tugged me to my feet as everyone stood up and/or got ready to leave my room behind (Kenichi tugged on Keiko's skirt and said something about icecream, to which she smiled and nodded).

It was only after Jin, who hovered at my elbow and chatter happily in my ear all the while, lead me from the room and almost all the way to the kitchen that I realized who we had left behind.

Genkai and Yusuke were nowhere to be seen.

* * *

"But there isn't any chocolate!" Kenichi whined as Keiko set a bowl full of off-white icecream down before him.

"All we have is vanilla," the human girl explained as she pulled a chair up next to the pouting child. "You'll have to make do."

"But I like chocolate better!"

"There isn't any." Her denial was as neat as her ironed skirt and blouse. "Maybe next time."

"Phooey." Kenichi picked up his nearby spoon and shoveled a large bite into his mouth. "Vanilla. Phooey."

"Better than nothing," said Keiko, but she ruffled the boy's hair with affection regardless.

I watched the exchange over a bowl of stir-fried vegetables and rice, peppered here and there with pale pink shrimp dyed dark by soy sauce. Yukina had made it earlier so now it was a bit cold, and yet despite this the meal was absolutely delicious.

_I bet Keiko comes out here a lot, _I thought as I swallowed a bite._ She and Kenichi act like siblings. Come to think of it, Kenichi and Yusuke act like brothers. Do they train together often?_ That thought brought me to a new line of thinking, and it was not a line as fun as the former. _Are Yusuke and Genkai talking about me? Probably. I mean, I just had strawberry eyes a few minutes ago. They're probably reporting all of this to Koenma as we speak. _

"Somethin' on your mind, Dani-san?"

I jumped, startled, but Jin only grinned as he sat down next to me at the table. Yukina hovered by the sink, washing dishes as she hummed a tune I did not recognize, so rather than admit my real thoughts I gesture at the ice apparition and asked: "Do you know what she's singing?"

He cocked his head to the side, red hair falling over his face as he did, and listened. "Oh, I know that one. Famous Demon World ditty called 'Fallin' Rain.'"

"Are there lyrics?" I asked, interested. I had had no idea that demons made music.

"Aye, o' course there're lyrics," he said. "Although I don't rightly know 'em. But it's about wanting rain t' come n' wash the bad away, let plants grow, end wars, that sort o' thing. It's one o' the few Demon World songs about peace n' light." He scratched his head, eyes screwed up in thought. "Now that I think about it, it might be th' _only _song not about death and fightin' all th' time."

"That's a pity," I asked, listening to Yukina again. 'Falling Rain' was a very pretty song written in minor key but with parts of it that bled into the hopeful major scale. My spirits felt brighter listening to it. "I'll have to ask Yukina to teach it to me soon."

"Aye, that you will." He sat facing me, elbows leaning on knees, head and shoulders stooped so that his eyes were only slightly below mine. The stance made me very aware of his height: sitting straight, he far overreached me. "Do ya know any songs about rain?"

I thought about it. "One," I said after a while. "Well, more than one, but I only know one well enough to play. I'll sing it to you tomorrow, if you want."

His face lit up. "I'd like that!" he said, ears doing a small up-and-down dance.

I smiled around a bite of stir-fry but was kept from further comment. Yusuke and Genkai chose that moment to come back to the kitchen. I turned to tell them hello, but when I saw how drawn their faces were I held myself back. Yusuke seemed especially tense with his hands jammed into his pockets, darting eyes, and line-thin mouth.

"Hey, don't give the kid sugar this late!" he snapped upon seeing Kenichi with his icecream. The boy had the stuff smeared across his mouth, and with hurt eyes he wiped it off on his shirtsleeve. Yusuke marched across the room and snatched up the bowl, almost seething beneath his skin.

"Yusuke!" Keiko said, standing up. She only reached his nose, but nonetheless she got right up in his face. "Give that back to him this instant!"

"He won't fall asleep and then he'll complain all day tomorrow during training," Yusuke snapped, holding the bowl over Kenichi's head with one hand so Keiko couldn't grab it. Kenichi, however, made to take it himself, so Yusuke dodged out from between the two of them to join Yukina at the sink. The ice apparition backed off a few feet, confused, as Yusuke held the bowl of icecream over the sink filled with dishes and dirty, soapy water.

Keiko advanced on him with murder in her eyes. "You give that here or so help me, Yusuke, I'll—"

"You'll what? Break up with me? Like you haven't been threatening me with that all day," he said, no, snarled.

Yukina gasped at how brash his words were, and Kenichi's eyes went very, very wide. He started to say something, probably to try and diffuse the situation, but Yusuke glared at him and he fell silent.

_He looks like a kid whose parents are fighting, and he's blaming himself,_ I observed as I glanced at the boy. _So I guess Keiko and Yusuke aren't like his siblings—he thinks of them as his mom and dad. _

That immediately made me wonder what the seemingly happy Kenichi's home life was like. Yusuke and Keiko weren't exactly model parents.

"I have not been threatening you," Keiko said.

Yusuke adopted a high-pitched voice, one that simpered and grated on my nerves. "Don't push it, Yusuke," he said, mocking what Keiko had said to him back in my room. "Don't mess with me, Yusuke. So help me, Yusuke."

"Just give Kenichi back his icecream!" Keiko snapped.

"It's OK," the boy said, voice desperate. "I don't need it, Keiko-nee-san, really I don't—"

"Oh yes you do," said Keiko.

"Oh no you don't," said Yusuke, and his arm jerked. With a splash the bowl of icecream hit the dishwater and disappeared, splattering Yukina and Yusuke both with brown liquid. Keiko gaped at him, thunderstruck by this open display of rebellion, and then her mouth snapped shut with a click of teeth against teeth.

"If I wanted to get nagged by a woman," said Yusuke, "I'd still be living at home!"

"Well, don't worry about being nagged any more, Yusuke," Keiko said, eyes ablaze and fists clenched. "We're through." She turned on her heel a left, paying Kenichi's protests no heed, and with a cry of her name Yukina chased after the spirit detective's angry ex-girlfriend. Kenichi stared down at his hands, eyes shut tight, and when Yusuke cursed and left, too, the boy looked as if he were about to cry. The tension in the room lingered long after Yusuke left. Kenichi, Genkai, Jin and I all did our best not to look at one another.

"I'm gonna go find Yusuke," Jin said at last, and he stood up to stretch. He gazed down at me for a second, smiling with a smile that did not reach his eyes. "Yukina'll calm Keiko down, so I gotta do the same for Yusuke. We'll probably fight a bit. That tends to zap the tension out of 'im well enough."

My lips quirked. "Try not to wreck the temple."

"Aye, I will," he said, and he touched my shoulder before leaving me alone with Kenichi and Genkai. I felt the warmth of his hand against my skin long after he left.

"Kenichi-kun," I said after a moment of silence. The boy didn't look at me. "Kenichi-kun, will you dry the dishes if I wash them?"

He didn't respond for a second, and then he nodded. He got up and pushed his chair over to the sink and grabbed a towel from a peg, waiting for me as I went to join him and submerged my hands in sudsy water. I cleaned a small plate first and handed it to him, catching his eye with a smile that he tried and failed to return.

"Don't look like that," I told him, and I skimmed a wad of foam off the surface of the water. I puffed it onto the tip of my nose and crossed my eyes, but still he did not smile. I frowned, got some more foam, and tapped it off onto his nose. That at last garnered a reaction, even it was only a forced laugh.

"It was my fault," he said as he dried another plate. "If I hadn't wanted icecream..."

"Yusuke was in a bad mood and would have found something to get mad at no matter who was around," I said.

"But I..."

"But nothing." I pulled the sponge along a particularly stubborn grease stain on a large serving platter. "It wasn't your fault."

He didn't say anything as he wiped the water off of a plate.

"Now, I don't know Yusuke very well, and I don't know Keiko that well, either," I said, "but I know a little bit about relationships. Yusuke and Keiko fight, but they care about each other. This probably isn't the first time they fought, and this fight was only over _icecream_. It's just a silly squabble, really. They'll pull through."

He stopped drying to look at me with an agonized expression and my heart went out to him. No kid deserves to feel like a fighting couple is their express fault.

"Do you really believe that?" he whispered, and when I nodded I saw a small tear escape from one of his large brown eyes and go rolling down his cheek. He wiped it away a heartbeat later, covering up his emotional state with an exaggerated frown. "If they break up for good I'll never forgive you."

I laughed at his misplaced anger, but I didn't correct him. "Heaven forbid," I said, and Kenichi grinned a little before hopping off his chair and pushing the piece of furniture back under the kitchen table.

"I'm off to bed," he said to both me and Genkai, and then he left us alone. I kept washing dishes, aware of her ominous silence, and when the silence became too much for me to bear I set my sponge down, dried my hands on a dishtowel, and turned around so I could lean against the counter. I crossed my arms over my chest as I stared at Genkai, who in turn stared down at her hands, clasped atop the table as if she were praying.

"So am I allowed to ask what the hell it was you and Yusuke were talking about to make him so damn mad?" I asked, feeling both angry and indignant.

"No, you're not," Genkai said.

"The fact that you're in here when you could be somewhere else makes me think you're gonna tell me about it anyway," I said.

She looked at me, and her eyes were tired. The bags beneath them spoke less of age than they did exhaustion. "We were talking about Keiko," she said.

"What about her?"

"Yusuke wants her to stay at the cabin with us while the others go for Seishou. Koenma says he can't be responsible for her. Yusuke got angry over it."

I thought about that. "You told Yusuke about that after seeing me with my eye-thing?" I asked. "Call me self-centered, but that's a rather random conversation under the given circumstances, don't you think?"

She looked away. "We may have discussed other things, too, but that is no concern of yours."

I wanted to tell her that that was bullshit and she knew it, but I held my tongue. "Well, let me know if it _becomes _my concern," I said, picking up my cane. I knew I sounded sarcastic but I couldn't help but sound that way. I'm not good at covering up being pissed.

"Where are you going?" she asked as I went for the door.

"Back to my room. I'll call you if it happens again."

She didn't stop me as I left.

* * *

On the way to my room I passed the door to the outside, and I couldn't help but notice that it had been left open. With a sigh I went to go close it (bugs could get in!), but then I heard the noises. I stopped to stand still in the shadows of the doorway, and with hesitance I peered outdoors. A few torches (tiki-looking ones, I would say if not for the fact that I was in a Buddhist temple) lit the courtyard outside, but I didn't see anything in their pool of flickering light until a few seconds later. Two shadows darted across the light too fast for me to follow, and then those shadows coalesced into the forms of Jin and Yusuke. I shrank back, unsure if they would react to seeing me watching them, but I could not tear my eyes away as Yusuke lunged at Jin with a raised fist. The windmaster jumped into the air with a twist, but Yusuke grabbed onto one of the redhead's trailing feet and yanked him back to earth, hard.

Jin was not that easily defeated, however. Using the momentum of Yusuke's yank, he readied his own fist and let it fly straight for Yusuke's face. The two objects connected with a crushing sound, and Yusuke skittered backward. Jin did not follow him, choosing instead to stand on his own two feet a few yards away.

"did that knock some sense into your skull?" the wind apparition asked, but he did not smile.

Yusuke raised a hand to wipe at the trail of blood leaking from his split lip. "Hardly," he snarled, but he did not attack.

"Could ya apologize t' Keiko now?" Jin asked, and the detective's shoulders slumped. I could practically see the fighting urge drain out of him right there.

"I didn't mean to snap at her!" Yusuke said.

"So tell 'er that," Jin said.

He pulled his fingers through his hair. "It's more complicated than that," Yusuke said.

"How?"

Yusuke gave a low growl of frustration and rubbed at his eyes. "I told her about what's going on," he said. "I probably shouldn't have, but I did, and I don't feel safe leaving her in the city during the raid, but Koenma won't let me take her to the safehouse."

Jin blinked. "Why the hell not? Are there rocks in that head o' his or somethin'?!"

"No," said Yusuke, taking a deep breath to calm himself. "He's afraid of letting any human stay in the house with..." He stopped.

"With who?" Jin said, face showing that he was just as confused as I felt.

Yusuke's next words made the bottom drop out of my stomach. "Dani," he said, jaw tightening.

Jin's eyes went wide, and then he exploded. "Dani-san wouldn't hurt a fly if it buzzed right in 'er face!" he said, and a wind strong enough to rattle the door I hid behind picked up.

"You saw her face tonight," Yusuke said. "That wasn't a human face!"

"Doesn't mean she's gonna attack someone!" Jin snapped.

"Genkai agrees with Koenma on this one!" Yusuke snapped back. That revelation made my eyes widen in hurt and shock. "The likelihood of Dani being on Seishou's side grew tonight. We have to watch her, Jin, not get caught off guard by her looks and—"

"Ya barely even know 'er!" Jin said, and the wind blasted so hard that Yusuke got pushed back a step. I felt cold, and with a shudder I wrapped my arms around my body.

"She's dangerous, Jin!" Yusuke said, and this time it was Jin who went on the offensive. In a mere blink's worth of time he had summoned a funnel of twisted air and debris around his arm and attacked Yusuke with it, a cry of rage making him seem feral and unreal. Yusuke barely had time to dodge, but he took advantage of Jin's sloppy attack to try and fight back. With a spin he aimed a high kick at Jin's head, and since the windmaster had not been anticipating a counter in his unfocused state he was unable to get away. Yusuke hit him square across the temple and sent him flying not into the sky, but right into the ground.

"You're too focused on _liking_ her to think straight!" Yusuke said as Jin picked himself up with a growl. "Don't think I can't see it! You go out of your way to talk to her, to do things for her!"

"Doesn't mean I _like_ her!" Jin said.

A glare made Jin look away with a blush. "You _held her hand _when she freaked out tonight, Jin!" Yusuke said, holding up his own hand to punctuate his point. My own hand tingled in response, reliving the memory.

"That was t' comfort her!" Jin said back. "She was scared n' in pain; wouldn't ya do the same?"

"Not for a dangerous demon with all this coincidence surrounding her," said Yusuke.

"She's not dangerous!"

"But she is a demon," said Yusuke. "Check out her energy once in a while. Her soul's human but her body is a demon's, through and through."

Jin, however, still managed to deny this irrefutable fact. "No demon could have a leg like that," he said stubbornly. "It's the law o' the jungle in Demon World. The strong kill the weak. Hell, Yusuke, most mothers kill off the weaklings at birth. There's no way a powerless little thing like Dani-san could've survived!"

"Maybe she's not as powerless as she lets on," Yusuke said. "Hiei says she was raised by humans, but there are memory gaps that could mean she experimented with demon powers or something. Maybe she even met Seishou during those times. There's just so much about her we don't know!"

"So maybe get t' know 'er a bit and you'll find out!"

Yusuke scoffed. "Are you really so desperate for an excuse to stay in Human World that you would latch on to the first girl without a boyfriend you came across?"

"I'm not latching!" Jin said. "And I'm not interested in her like that! You take that back!"

"Yeah, right," said Yusuke. "Take a step back and look at this rationally, Jin. You want to stay here to fly, so instead of winning a tournament you're now trying to get a girlfriend and a reason to stay here. And you know what, that could actually work if it weren't for the fact that _you're trying to date a potential monster._"

"Dani-san is not a monster!" Jin growled.

Yusuke's eye hardened into twin slits of protective malice. "Tell me that after Keiko dies by Dani's hand. I'm not letting Keiko's life on your hunch about your little girlfriend." The detective breezed past Jin and headed for the porch, leaving the windmaster standing alone in the center of the courtyard. I froze, shrinking into the shadows of the hallway, and when Yusuke came in he stopped dead in his tracks.

"So how much of that did you hear?" he asked without turning to me. His face was in shadow, leaving his expression a mystery.

"All of it," I said once I found my voice. "And I agree with all of it, too."

He nodded. "At least you're a reasonable enemy."

"I'd try telling you that I'm not an enemy if I thought you'd buy it. But you won't, so I won't."

His eyes glittered as they found me in the dark. "Then I'm glad we understand each other," he said, and he left me alone in the mire of my own confusions.

* * *

"He's right, you know."

Jin, still standing in the courtyard with a look of utmost concentration plastered across his face, glanced up at me. Our eyes met for only a moment before he had to look away.

"I am dangerous," I said, limping down the porch stairs one at a time. "I don't know how, but I know I am. Yusuke and Genkai and Koenma are all right. I am too much of a coincidence to be trusted."

"I trust ya."

"Maybe you shouldn't."

"I do, though."

I walked until I stood only a few feet away. The sky overhead burned with stars. "Something happened to me tonight that I can't explain," I said. "You saw it. Everyone saw it. Maybe if I had my memories I could tell you what that something was, but I can't. For all I know I could be bent on killing every single one of you."

"You wouldn't do that."

"Wouldn't I?"

He looked up at me at last, and we stared at each other for a long time. Silence didn't feel right.

"When my memory gaps get filled in, they could be filled with horrible things," I said.

"Or nothing at all," Jin argued.

"True," I said. "But I could still be a different person once they're put back in place. And you might not like that Dani quite so much."

"I might, though."

We stared at one another again. Hair blew into his eyes, coaxed out of place by a wind he did not create.

"For the good of your relationship with the others," I said slowly, "it might be a good idea to keep away from me. Until things cool off, at least."

"And after things 'cool off?'"

The question gave me pause. "We'll see," I told him at last, and I turned to walk away. I crossed the courtyard, climbed the steps, and was about to go inside when I paused and looked at him over my shoulder. Those wide eyes made me ache.

"I'll still sing you that rain song, though," I told him, and then I went indoors with welling eyes.

* * *

I mediated as I fell asleep. I guess that's why I trusted the figment of my dreams that night.

"You've changed the past already," Koenma said. We floated across from one another in a white void that lacked everything besides the two of us. He seemed older than the last time we spoke, with more lines on his face and longer, scragglier hair.

"How?" I asked.

"Jin wasn't in it."

"Oh."

"There wasn't a party, either." He smiled, the lines around his eyes crinkling. "Beware, though. I can give you no guidance past this point."

I snorted. "Like you've given me any already?"

His smile faded. "I came to you on your first night," he said, eyes going distant.

The memory hit me like a freighter. "Botan!" I gasped.

He nodded. "Grisly, wasn't it?"

"That was the Beasts, right?" I asked, remembering the horrendous nature of her death. "Not Seishou or his goons?"

"It was the Beasts."

I let out a breath of relief. "Thank goodness. Psychics I can deal with. Skin-takers, no way."

"And if you do this right, you'll never have to deal with them," said Koenma. "Not outside of your dreams, at least."

"Ha, I knew it!" I said, snapping my fingers in triumph. I had suspected the Beasts were behind my dreams, but I had no way to be certain without someone to back my opinion up. "Is that why you've only influenced my dreams once? Because the Beasts took over all the other times?"

He nodded. "I am weak, Dani. The longer you stay in the past, the weaker I become and the most distant our connection grows." Suddenly he was next to me and cupping my face in his hands. His thumbs stroked the crest of my cheekbones in slow circles. "I will try to see you again. I can guarantee nothing."

"I'm trying to make everything right," I breathed.

He nodded. "Master the feats your body is capable of. Learn to use them to your advantage. Keep your eyes and ears open."

"But they stopped trusting me," I said. "I don't know if they'll let me in anymore. How am I supposed to help them when they won't even let me in?"

"You'll just have to gain that trust back," he told me.

"But—"

"But nothing." Hie eyes were hard, as compromising as a rock. "Earn their trust. Do not let the Book out of your sight."

"I haven't even seen it yet!" I protested.

"But you've felt it," he said. "You can taste it on the air and feel it in the fabric of your dreams." With a smile he leaned forward and touched his lips to my forehead.

"I feel like I've gone nowhere," I said thickly.

"I have faith in you," he whispered against my skin. "I chose you because I believe you will succeed. You aren't the type to give up."

"It's just so hard, though."

"And you're letting a little adversity get to you now?" he said, pulling away from me. "The Beasts feed off of your emotions, Dani. Do not allow yourself to become weak. You will be easy prey for them, then." He paused, eyes trained on something in the distance. "I must go," he said, and he turned away.

"Wait!" I jumped after him, twisting my hands into the back of his shirt. "Don't leave me! You're the only one I can talk to, Koenma!"

"Dani..."

"I'm alone except for you. Don't leave."

He turned around and pulled me to him, and for a second I felt like I would cry. But the urge passed and all I did was wrap my arms around his waist, breathing deep of his scent. He smelled like shattered concrete and faded cologne, and I tried to memorize him with a few deep breaths.

"I'm always with you if you look deep enough," he said, and then he pushed me away. "I must go. They'll find me soon."

"Wait!" I cried, and I reached out to touch him again. All I touched, however, was air, and with a cry I sat up, suddenly awake, and the world of white went away. I found myself alone in my bed, gasping for air and reaching forlornly into the dark for a person who did not exist in this world.

Struck with the despair of this, I wept.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_This chapter almost did not get written. For some reason I had trouble just getting the words out—mounds of it, heaps of it, mountains of it. But write it I did, and while I cannot say I am particularly fond of the results, I was able to move the plot forward and take care of everything I wanted nonetheless. In that much I am satisfied._

_On a lighter note, we now know that the first dream was a good thing (relatively speaking) and that the Beasts are indeed responsible for the dreams. Some of you saw that coming, so keep those keen eyes peeled!_

_I have done a brief estimate of this story's length, and I'm thinking that it'll end up being roughly forty (40) or so chapters long. So we're halfway done. Sorry this thing is dragging out so long!_

_Also, I'm sorry this chapter was so depressing! I don't know how that happened. But I updated my KuwabraxOC fic, "Scratch," last night, and it's a mostly-humor fic that could lighten your mood if you desire a little Graphospasm humor. (And yes, this is a shameless advertisement. GO READ! =P)_

_Hiei is winning the poll by 56%, so those of you who ship otherwise need to submit votes! Surprisingly, a few people voted for the "bring in another character" option—who are you holding out for? Just curious, so let me know!_

_Thanks to those who reviewed! Y'all rock! Thanks to the Under-Cover Fangirl, 0nfateswings, Dragon of Twilight, kurochanwithwings, WickedLovelyDream, White Rose Fox, AkaMizu-chan, chocolateluvr13, Wolf-Cry-Night, Kaiya's Watergarden, ilovemusicrox12, Reclun, Talye Kendrin, RedbudInTheSky, rain chant, ichixichigo, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Panda-chan31, heve-chan, DoilyRox, Anon18, Masuyo Shun, Dyani91, and ShadowFireFox13._


	22. Chapter 22: Til I Hear You Sing

Future Talk

Chapter 22:

"Til I Hear You Sing (Once More)"

* * *

It's not good to suck up to people when they don't trust you. Doing so only makes it look like you're trying to hide something. Forgive me when I say that Jin and I stopped talking as much, and try not to get angry when I tell you that I spent more and more time in my room as each day passed. But I did make sure to always wash dishes and offer to help Yukina cook, and while these things did serve to keep me well within the ice apparition's good graces, no one else seemed keen to be friends.

Neither Genkai nor Hiei approached me about further training, and Yusuke took to ignoring me rather than insulting me. Keiko, on the other hand, rolled her eyes whenever I spoke (which was less and less often as the days went by) and she did her best to make sure I was never left alone with either Yukina or Kenichi. Both the apparition and the child protested this, but Keiko was insistent.

Jin glanced in my direction when he thought I wasn't looking, and I tried my hardest to never look in his.

Kenichi, surprisingly, talked to me more often than before, and he snuck into my room to ask for ukelele lessons and mediation tips. I learned a lot about the others from him, which I suppose they would have resented had we been discovered. Yusuke would have accused me of fishing for information, certainly. Perhaps it was a product of our conversation in the kitchen that made me more accessible, or perhaps it was the sheer taboo of speaking to me. I have no idea.

Genkai rarely looked my way, but I caught her staring at me with a calculating expression over dinner on more than one occasion. Her gaze—intent in a way I did not understand—scared me almost as much as Yusuke's glowering silences did.

I spent more and more time in my room with the ukelele and drum, emerging for lonely baths and quiet meals, and I did my best to keep out of everyone's way.

Alone, at night, I practiced shapeshifting.

Changing the shape and color of my features came somewhat easily. I could alter my eye color and skin tone and hair color after a week and a half of self-study, and when those things came to me with relative ease I moved on to changing my body. With that vein of study, however, I had little success. I could lengthen my fingers and toes and limbs somewhat, but even after another two weeks of concentrated attempts I could not pull feats like the ones I had witnessed the shape-shifter perform in that long-ago Demon World clearing. No tentacles, no extra limbs, no teeth the length of my forearm... just toes with an extra digit and some pumped up muscles. Nothing too noteworthy.

I also learned that my shifting came more easily with pain or anger, and I developed a wound below my lower lip from where I had repeatedly bit myself to start the change. My palms became decorated with small crescent moons made by the curves of my fingernails as they dug into the soft flesh of my hand. I scrubbed those wounds raw in the baths, trying to make them appear like an accident part of the bathing process.

No one, not even Yukina, commented on those marks, nor did anyone offer to heal them. In fact, no one ever commented on me if they could help it, although it should interest you to know that I did have one run-in with Hiei in the weeks preceding the ball and the relocation of the Book of Beasts.

It happened on the day I got too close (on accident, of course) to the Book of Beasts itself.

* * *

After a particularly intense session of shifting practice (I was working on changing my muscle mass, which was surprisingly easy and led me to spending some time in front of the mirror striking body-builder poses) I took a long, steaming hot bath before crawling into my futon. I lay there for a long time, staring at the ceiling in the dark, feeling my limbs ache from the strain of repeated mutation and reformation. I hadn't spoken to anyone but Yukina that day, and all she had said to me was to pass her a dish as we stood next to one another at the sink, rubbing the faces of the plates with sponges and soapy water.

_I wish someone would talk to me sometime,_ I thought as the darkness pressed close. My eyes felt heavy; soon enough they started to fall shut. Darkness purer than a mere lack of light washed over me in slow, undulating waves, and then I knew no more.

Not for long, anyway.

A noise made me twitch awake. I sat up in bed, heart flying into my mouth, and the noise—a shiver of metal sliding against metal—repeated itself. A light from the hallway bulb creeped under the door, and as my eyes strained to find something in the gloom I noticed the two shapes marring that single line of illumination.

_Feet?_ I thought, and then the door opened. A spear of light passed over my face, making me raise a hand to shield my night-blind eyes from the attack, and then I saw the dark shape peering through the six-inch crack with eyes deeper than any shadow I had ever seen. They seemed to suck in all the light around and kill it mercilessly, in a way that chilled me to the core and made my skin ripple and jerk. I opened my mouth to scream, terrified, but the figure held a very human finger to its lips and a pair of eyes—kind eyes of dark brown, eyes that were no longer forged of unforgiving black—smiled at me. I closed my mouth, heart quieting, as the hand's fingers curled in the universal gesture of 'come here.'

Then the figure disappeared.

I picked up my cane as if in a trance, and with shaking knees I stood up. "Wait!" I whispered into the dark, and when I wrenched open the door and stepped into the hallway all of the lights went out. I muffled a small scream, but when I could stand without shaking I looked down the stretch of hallway that lead toward the rest of the temple.

No one was there.

I turned to look in the other direction, toward the bathroom and the other bedrooms belonging to Hiei and Jin and who knows who else. I had never been past the bathroom in that direction, which made me nervous considering that the mysterious figure was standing far past it, where the hallway made an abrupt turn to the left. I opened my mouth to say something to the person, but they raised a hand and motioned for me to follow, which I did. I crept as quietly as I could past the bathing area and a few closed doors until I reached the turn, and with hesitation born of unfamiliarity I looked into that portion of the hall.

The figure stood at the far end of it, at the junction of another corner. The moment our gazes locked he turned and walked away.

"Just how far does this hallway go?" I muttered as I started after him. When I got to the end of that hall and looked into the next stretch of it, I once again had the pleasure of seeing my secretive friend walk away from me. I tried to keep track of the turns we took as I continued to chase him, but eventually I realized how he had been leading me into the heart of a veritable maze, and soon I became hopelessly lost with only the phantom for a guide.

_How the heck am I going to get back to my room?_ I thought as I rounded another corner, but the worry disappeared when I saw what was in front off me. My mouth dropped open in shock, and then it closed again with a clack. Pain made my eyes water; I had bitten my tongue on accident.

Before me stood a door at the end of its own little stretch of hallway. The oak panel was huge, bigger than any door I had ever seen in the temple, standing at roughly three times my height and only slightly less so wide. Hanging from the doorframe and ceiling were long strips of linen painted with ancient characters I could not read, and the ink they had been transcribed with looked faded and brown, brown like... well, like old blood, if you really want to know. Smaller strips of paper and cloth hung from strings that crisscrossed the hallway and door at random, and those objects I recognized (from both Yu Yu Hakusho and its creator's wife's most famous work, Sailor Moon) as wards of some sort. Torches—not gas lights or bulbs but real, fire-glowing torches—sat in sconces to either side of the door, providing the incredible scene with flickering illumination that only served to make the picture more eerie.

But I didn't look at that for very long. I was busy staring at the man in front of me.

As he tilted his head back to get a better look at me, I realized that my tongue had been glued to the roof of my mouth, preventing me from speaking as I saw the man's oval glasses glitter in the light of the torches. His thinning brown hair glimmered a bit, and I noticed that it hadn't been trimmed in at least a month. He had stubble on his jaw and bags beneath his eyes, bags so dark they looked like black eyes or rings of ink. As he passed a hand over his face the way he always did when he was tired, I noticed that the bones of his knuckles pressed sharply through his skin. He hadn't been eating well, I deduced, and with a rattling intake of breath I reached for him, letting my cane fall to the ground with a clatter.

"Daddy," I whispered.

He smiled, but he did not come closer. "Ohayo, Danielle."

His words—spoken in Japanese—threw me off. But despite his language choice, the voice was undeniably my father's. "How... how did you get here, Otousan?" I said, adressing him in Japanese. The words took a long time to conjure up.

"We miss you, Danielle," Dad said, ignoring my question.

"I miss you too, Otousan," I said, a lump forming in my throat. "I'm so scared, and I'm alone. No one likes me, which is normal, I guess, but it still hurts."

"I'm sorry," he said, eyes shining with sorrow. "I'm sorry you have to face this by yourself. You're still a child. You shouldn't have to bear this burden alone."

"Oh, Daddy," I said, and this time a tear got past my defenses. I held my hands out even more, reaching for him. "Oh Daddy, I miss you so much, I just wish—"

"I had to show you this place," he said, interrupting me. "It was about time you saw it. You have no idea how worried about you your mother and I are. Come home to us soon."

My hands fell. "Daddy," I said, swallowing the sudden onset of tears. "Daddy, I'm not coming home."

"What? Of course you're coming home," he said, a frown etching lines of worry between his eyes.

"No." I shook my head, fists clenching at my sides. "Otousan, I can't come home. I... I _died_. This is my place now."

His smile was a condescending one. "Death?" he said. "You think death is a worthy adversary?"

"A... adversary?"

"How did you think I got here?" he said, and he gestured at the door. "I made a bargain with them."

My body went cold. "No," I said.

"They're kind, and they only wish to help," he said, smiling at me with gentleness and patience. The world around us darkened, fading in and out like a dim movie reel. "I serve them, and they allowed me to see you. To help you. If you serve them, they'll let you go home. They promise."

"Daddy, the Book is evil," I said, and as I spoke the darkness lessened. "You can't trust it; it's much too powerful! It'll kill us all if we let it!"

But my father only laughed, and the darkness pressed back in with with a vengeance. "Power is not evil," he said, eyes glittering in derision. "Who taught you that? Power can do anything. It's the only real _good_ thing in the universes!"

I started to reply, to tell him he was so, so wrong, but something stopped me. I turned, feeling as if someone was behind me, _watching_ me, but no one stood with us in the dim hallway. In fact, there no longer _was_ a hallway: only my father, myself, and that damnable door glowing with foul energy.

"Listen to me, Danielle," said my father, and my vision spun. His voice was hypnotic and full. "The Beasts are your friends. The people here... they're enemies. They'll use you, then abandon you. The Beasts can send you home." I felt sick to my stomach. "Trust them. Listen to me. Listen to your father."

His words hit me like a blow. "You've never said that to me before!" I said, shaking my head from side to side, trying to drive his words out. They curled around my brain like snakes, poisoning my thoughts. "You always listen to me, discuss things with me, argue with me when you think I'm wrong, but you never tell me to listen to you like a blind little child!"

He pulled back. "Danielle, what are you—"

"You're not my father!" I screamed, clutching my head with my hands, and I fell to my knees on the hard wood floor, which was suddenly there again. "Daddy made me a promise!" I screamed, and with a burst of mental power I summoned the up that long-ago memory.

Dad's hair had been thicker then, and I had been shorter. Through the view-finder of my child's eyes I approached our kitchen table, where Dad sat doing a crossword. When he saw me he smiled and put down his pen.

I wore a brace around my leg in those days, which made up for me not having a cane. I crawled into Dad's lap, fumbling over the pencil and notepad I clutched in my third-grader's arms, and when I got settled I asked: "Can you help me with my homework?"

"Sure."

"I need to know what a democracy is." I readied the pencil and paper, eyes trained intently on his face. "That's our assignment. We gotta find out what it is for history tomorrow."

"Well," he said, taking off his glasses. He had only needed them for reading back then; he wore them all the time when I got older. "Well, a democracy is a system of government in which..." His detailed explanation lost me after the first few words, and when he saw my bewildered expression he sighed. "It's a type of government that decides things with votes," he said. "It's fair because everyone has a say in what happens to them."

I frowned. "We don't have one of those here," I said.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't have a say in when I have to eat my vegetables."

His laugh all but shook the roof overhead. "True. Your mother gets to pick that one." But then his face grew solemn. "Danielle," he said, after a time, "I'm going to make you a promise."

I perked up at that. "What kind?" I said. "A pinky swear?"

He nodded. "But it's a very serious pinky swear that I want you to remember, always. Can you do that for me?"

"Of course!"

"I'm going to promise to always listen to you," he said. "In return I want you to listen to me, too, but know that I will never turn away when you want me to hear you."

I held up my pinky. "Swear it!" I said, and his larger finger enveloped my smaller one.

"I love you, Daddy," I said as out fingers dropped.

"And I love you more than air, Danielle," my father said, and he kissed my forehead.

The memory faded, then, and the thing that was most certainly not my father was standing before me in the hallway.

"You promised to listen to me!" I yelled at it, and then its mask cracked to reveal the roiling darkness underneath. "Stop pretending to be my father because you _suck_ at it!"

"You try my patience, girl," it growled, skin flaking off onto the ground, and as it took a step toward me I found myself caught in its black gaze. My mind start racing as I saw its shoulders widen to a brutish length, and when arms began to forms massive hands glittering with claws of dark cloud I felt my pulse start to pound.

_Get your cane and run!_ I told myself, but my hands refused to move. The thing came even closer, and when my body still refused to obey I lashed out with my music, instead. I summoned up a barrage of notes from one of Mozart's symphonies and threw it at the Beast with all my might, but it simply raised a hand—a hand covered in scales and feathers and slime—and batted the music away.

"You think you can beat me with your pathetic powers?" it said, laughing in a voice that was no longer my beloved father's. That voice was too dark, like clouds that brewed tornadoes and hurricanes in their depths, and it washed over me in a wave that made my unbound hair crackle with static power. "Your powers are nothing compared to mine, even warded and bound as I am! You have defied me long enough, girl from another world—now die like the dog you are!"

It lunged.

You know how people say that your life flashes before your eyes when death comes at you from the front? In that moment those people were right, at least in my case. _I failed, _I thought as visions of Koenma giving me my orders popped in and out of my mind, and then the faces of the ones I had failed shimmered in my head. My parents—my beautiful mother and down-to-earth, loving father—echoed like wraiths, and then a vision of Yusuke insulting me, Kuwabara requesting my music, Yukina laughing as we splashed at the sink, Kenichi glowing with pride as he played a new chord, Genkai's smirk as I fumbled with her instructions, Kurama's fierce expression as he held me to him, protecting me with all his might, Jin's open smile as we talked beneath a sky put to shame by the color of his eyes, and Hiei telling me with his unfathomable eyes that I needed to call for him the next time I was in trouble... Hiei.

_Hiei!_

My eyes opened when the Beast was but a heartbeat from my body, and I summoned a wall of music to ward him off. But the Beast was too strong, and it paused for only a moment in order to tear a gaping hole in my defense.

Luckily for me that moment was enough, because then the Beast erupted with purple fire.

"About time you let me in, you idiot," said the voice of my savior, and then to the Beast he said: "Her power may be less than yours, bound and warded as you are, but mine can crush you no matter your pathetic handicap." Hiei stepped past me to shield me with his body, and I felt relief coat me from the inside out when I saw his broad shoulders and ratted cloak fanning out in the invisible wind of his power.

The black thing screamed as more violet fire rippled across its skin, and with a sound like thunder it collapsed into a heap of flesh-toned muck. The muck congealed into a human form after a second, and then it raised its head to reveal familiar features beneath thinning cocoa hair.

"Stop using my father's face!" I screamed at it, standing on my knees. I picked up my cane and stood, and Hiei turned his head so he could see me from the corner of his eye. "That's my otousan, not your puppet! Let Daddy go, you monster!"

"Quit crying," Hiei said in a low voice, and I noticed the tears on my cheeks for the first time. "It's not your father and it can't hurt your father, so stop crying. I'll take care of you."

"Daddy," I said, not capable of saying anything else at that point, and Hiei turned back to the monster wearing my father's face. He raised his hands—neither were bandaged and neither held evidence of the black dragon tattoo he was famous for—and closed his eyes. The third eye on his forehead gleamed violet before the glow spread to engulf his hands, and with a motion one would use to throw a punch he let his fists of energy fly. The fire enveloped my father's form, reducing the creature to a writhing, screaming mess of bones and torn skin, and with a pop the mess coalesced into another puddle of dark matter. The matter slid under the warded door all on its own, retreating from my sight so completely it was as if it had never existed.

Hiei turned to me then. "Wake up," he said, and then I was falling into his arms with all the bonelessness of the dead.

* * *

I awoke on the floor with the fire apparition kneeling next to me. His face hovered over mine, and there was an uncharacteristic tenseness in his lips that lent itself to a worried expression.

"What'd I miss?" I asked as I sat up. My temples were pounding, though from what I did not know.

"I took you to your room."

Well, that explained the cushiony futon that made lying down so pleasant. "But..."

"You were sleepwalking," Hiei said, eyes narrowed as they stared at me, "and dreaming all the while. I followed you to the door."

"You mean... that was all a dream?" I said, flabbergasted. "It felt real! My dad came to my room and lead me to that door thing, and..."

"You started talking to your father when you got to the door," Hiei told me, "and when I tried to get inside your head..."

"The thing was blocking you, wasn't it," I said, voice thick.

"Yes. But you created a chink in its defenses when you called for me."

"I... I think I felt you there, at one point," I said, looking at him.

He nodded. "Your turned and looked at me, once. The Beast noticed and worked harder to hold you in its grip."

"Thank you for saving me, Hiei."

His voice and eyes were steady. "I told you I would."

"Thank you, though." I meant it.

He looked away. "You're lucky I'm the one on duty tonight," he said. "Had it been any of the others, you would be in chains right now."

That gave me pause. "Why am I not in chains with_ you_, then?" I asked.

He didn't reply, but he did stand up and move to lean against the wall next to the door.

"That thing," he said, with distaste and a disgusted curl of the lip, "preys on weak minds with promises of wishes fulfilled. You didn't meditate to fall asleep tonight. Don't bother with protests because I know I'm right."

"Yeah, you are." I pulled my knees up to my chest, wrapped my arms around them, and rested my chin on them. "I was just tired, I guess."

He snorted. "You sit around all day playing with your little ukelele. What right do you have to be tired?"

My temper flared, but I took a deep breath to reign it back in. "It's hard to be a happy, productive person when you're under stress," I said in the calmest voice I could muster.

"Stress?"

"It's hard to have everybody you need to rely on hate you for being alive. Oh, and not to mention that they hate me for being alive when I really should be dead. It's adding insult to injury and all that." I sighed. "There I was, happy just to be alive again, and it's like I killed someone."

Hiei then did something I did not expect to ever see: he rolled his eyes. "Poor little Dani," he said, mocking me.

I looked down at my toes; one set was slim and pale, but the other was gnarled like the bark of an old tree. "Sorry for being so emo. I just miss home, I guess," I said. "The thing behind that door must have sensed that when it decided to look like my father." I pressed my forehead to my knees and tried not to cry again; I was doing that far too much lately. "I'm sorry. I'm kind of emotional. It's just... this is a lot to take in. I thought I was coping, and then I saw his face. Made me remember how much I miss him, and that I'll never..." The rest of the sentence ("see my family again") faded away when I felt the tears overflow.

"Stop crying," he said.

I muffled a sob for a few seconds, and then I remembered that I needed to breathe. Breathing, however, made me sob. It was a no-win situation.

I heard him sigh before he spoke. "If I give you something," he said, "will you stop crying?"

"Bargaining only works on children," I said between gasps for air.

"Then it should suit you just fine." When I looked up to glare at him, he smirked and pushed away from the wall. "Follow me," he said, and he opened the door.

* * *

"This," I said when I saw it, "this is... where did you get this?"

He walked into the room, filled to the brim with junk as it was, on feet that made no sound. "Genkai found it in here a few days ago," he said, walking up to the object I could not take my eyes off of. "She was going to show it to you after she had it tuned, but then you made the mistake of having red eyes and she decided you didn't deserve it."

I grimaced. "Damn."

Hiei, after making his little bargain with me, had led me through another set of maze-like hallways until we came across a large set of double doors. Within it lay a room full of random junk; most objects looked like antiques, but they were all the broken kind I had cleaned out of my closet when I first moved in. Sitting in front of the piles and cases filled with stuff, however, was an object that was most certainly not junk.

A piano.

The old upright, complete with a hollow stool that could hold a music book or two, had been made with pale brown wood and polished to a loving shine, but years of being pent up in a dusty room had dulled the lacquer until it more resembled the lackluster gleam of cookiedough. I passed Hiei to approach it, and when I lifted the keyboard's lid to see the keys within I was assailed with a cloud of dry dust. I sneezed; my nose started to run a bit from the combination of that and crying. The keys had all aged to the color of musty ivory, and a few of them were peeling along the tops. And the black keys weren't black—instead they had been made of dark mahogany that complimented the piano's body.

I tentatively pressed the middle 'c' key, but the resulting tone was so off-pitch that I winced.

"Can you play on it?" Hiei asked as he came to stand behind me. His proximity was a bit overwhelming so I made a point of walking around the piano, studying every inch of it for damage.

"I can play it if I can manage to tune it," I said once I looked under the hood to determine if the instrument was in one piece or not. I had been taught to tune pianos by a teacher at college who insisted that the first step to learning to play well was getting to know your instrument on the most intimate of levels: assembling, building, and tuning. Luckily enough for me, a carpet bag sitting atop the piano's case held a set of tuner's tools that were dusty with disuse. I poked around in the bag for a bit, making sure it had what I needed, and as I popped the lid I looked at Hiei and said: "Will you help me?"

"I'm not musical," he said harshly, as if the thought repulsed him. Or... embarrassed him?

"I just need you to press this key when I tell you to," I said. I walked around the piano, grabbed his hand, and set his index finger on the middle 'c' key. His hand was hot beneath my own and I let him go quickly. "Press it when I tell you to," I said, and I rounded the piano again. I manipulated the tuning hammer and the mutes within the bowels of the piano with practiced ease, and when I had them aligned the way I wanted I said: "Press."

He barely tapped the key. I couldn't hear the pitch at all.

"Again. A bit more firmly."

The next one was much too harsh, and when I looked up from my task inside the instrument I saw that Hiei has contorted his face into a mask of complete concentration. I suppressed a smiled.

"Ease up a tiny bit," I said, and he did so. I adjusted my tools according to what I heard. "There, perfect! Again, again, again, good!" The key twanged into the right note a moment later, and one by one we managed to get the thing back into decent shape. I was sweating by the time we were done (forcing the pegs into rights is tough on the arm muscles) but when we finished I realized that I had not felt happier in days. I tucked the tuning gear back into its bag and pulled out the piano's stool. Hiei moved to the side of the piano and rested his arm on the case while I sat down and played a few scales, hands growing more and more limber with practice.

"Good tone, nice pitch," I said as I played my scales. The pedals stuck a little bit, but as I worked them I could feel them loosen up. "Awesome."

"Are you happier now?"

I looked up at him; he was staring at my hands.

"I feel better than I have in days," I admitted.

His eyes met mine. "Good," he said, still looking at me. "Now play me something."

I blinked at him. "Just like that?"

"Yes."

"Um... let me get my head together..."

"We'll be here all night if that's the case."

"Oh, shut up," I said sourly, and as I fooled around with a few chords I pulled a song out of repertoire. Back home I had a small obsession with piano covers of famous songs, and I had picked up more than a few over the years. With a smile and a sigh I began the tinkling intro to a cover of Owl City's "Fireflies," and then I let my hands do their thing.

If I have to be vain about one of my features, it would be my hands. Through years of practice and conditioning I have turned them into crafty little devils, and even if my fingers are kind of stubby and small I can still pound out music with the best of them. 'Fireflies' is a good showcase of their dexterity, considering its quick melody and scintillating harmony, but all in all the music just made me _happy_, pure and simple. I sang one of the verses with a smile before retreating back into the joy of a simple play-through.

"You move well," Hiei said when the short song ended. "Too bad your brain isn't as quick as your hands."

I scowled. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

"And your voice is weak. You can carry a tune, but you're nothing special."

I dropped my hands into my lap and glared at him. "I won't play anything else if you keep insulting me!"

He snorted, but he did not apologize. Then again, had I really expected him to?

"Where did you learn that song?" he asked.

I laced my fingers together, turned them upside down, and stretched. My knuckles gave a satisfying series of cracks. "I listened to it over and over again," I said, hands falling to the bench, "so I guess I learned it by ear."

"Play me another."

My fingers drifted across the keys. "What's your rush?" I asked.

"What's with your hesitation?" he countered.

"The piano is capable of a lot more than the ukelele," I said. "I have a lot more to choose from."

He said nothing for a moment, and then: "Sing me something."

I pretended to be aghast as I put a hand to my chest and said: "What, with _my_ weak voice?"

Hiei exhaled and grimaced. "Yes," he said. "It's... not unpleasant."

"Wow, is complimenting me really that painful?" I joked, and my hands—seemingly on their own—tapped out a brief sketch of a poignant melody. It fit my mood perfectly, even if it was about lost _romantic_ love and my own lost love was more familial, but still. Nothing else suited me.

"A man is supposed to sing this," I said, playing a few chords with new purpose. "A tenor. It's supposed to be about longing, but it's maybe a little hopeful, full of conviction."

"Why?"

"Because the man who sings it is in love," I said, playing a few more chords. I recalled the storyline of "The Phantom of the Opera" and its sequel with a small, bitter smile. "He hasn't seen her for ten years. She was his muse, the only one who could ever give his genius and passion a voice. But now... now she's gone. And it hurts him every moment. Every moment is a day, every day a year, and every year a century."

I stopped playing long enough to wipe my eyes on my shirt. I hadn't felt them moisten.

"Romantic drivel," Hiei said, dismissing me with a toss of his head.

I glowered at him. "It's more than that," I said.

"What, then?"

I looked back at the yellowed keys and felt their rough surface glide beneath my fingertips. "He was a freak of nature," I said, staring at the cracking keys, "with a face so hideously deformed it made a priest suggest killing him at birth. He was loathed by all, an abomination whose very mother didn't want him."

Hiei shifted when I said that, and I remembered with a pang of regret who I was talking to. But it was too late to turn back.

"His soul isn't an abomination, though. He has a voice that God envies, a voice that could end wars or begin them, depending on his mood. He's a genius, but he's lonely and unappreciated, full of despair and self-hatred." In a fit of whimsy I began to play, with my right hand, the melody of 'Think of Me.' "And then, ten years ago, he heard her singing all alone, full of a despair of her own, and he fell in love with her untainted soul and clear voice, not to mention her fragility. He helped her become the greatest singer to ever live, and she made him feel, for the first time in his life, that he was wanted and loved." I transitioned into 'The Music of the Night.' "He gave her his soul. He would do anything for her. He wrote her the most beautiful melodies and sought to give her the world."

Hiei snorted. "A pretty story, but idealistic," he said.

I began to play the melody of 'All I Ask of You'. "She left him for another."

Hiei went still.

"She left him for dead but he still loves her, obsessively. And so, after ten long years, he sings this song as he laments their time apart and wishes for something more." I sat up straight and set my fingers to their proper positions. "Will you read my mind for the meaning?" I asked Hiei.

He nodded, and I felt the tickle in my head that signaled his intrusion.

"Alright, then," I said, and with a smile I began to play "Til I Hear You Sing Once More."

The song began softly, tenderly, like a hand on a lover's cheek, and I crooned out the words as such. The dimness around me seemed to intensify, but in a comforting way.

_The day starts, the day ends_

_Time crawls by_

_Night steals in, pacing the floor_

_The moments creep,_

_Yet I can't bear to sleep_

_Till I hear you sing_

Soon, however, the song escalated into something more. It rose to a fever pitch of love and longing and regret, opening up like a bleeding wound crossed with a blooming flower. My fingers pounded the keys even as my voice dropped to a whispering caress, feeling with every part of me the homesickness I felt when I saw my father's face.

_And sometimes, at night time,_

_I dream that you are there,_

_But wake holding nothing but the empty air._

The regret intensified into mourning for a moment; the singer is obsessively pining for that which is no longer there, as was I when I let the lyrics out. And then—oh, and then—there is longing so intense it could kill, a sharp pain as sweet as the most seductive melody, and it becomes apparent that the singer can't be whole without her, the one he loved more than life itself.

_I'll always feel_

_No more than halfway real_

_Till I hear you sing once more!_

"I am incomplete without you," the song seemed to be saying. "You are my reason for drawing breath."

I let the final note, the signature emotion of loss and love, linger for far longer than I should have. But I knew that once the song was gone I would be bare for the world to see, so I dragged it out, and I couldn't help but cry when it faded at long last. My tears dappled the ivory keys like rain, and I put my hands over my face.

"You said you wouldn't cry anymore," Hiei said, annoyed. The tickle was gone.

"I'm," I said between sobs, "sorry."

"So stop crying," he said, and I heard the rustle of his cloak before I felt him sit beside me on the piano bench.

But I couldn't quit. He grabbed my hands by the wrists, wrenched them from my face, and pushed them against the keys. A harsh discord followed.

"Look at me," he said as he held my hands against the keys. The notes rippled on the air.

I looked at him, sniffing. He was frowning.

"The thing behind the door has marked you," he said, eyes glowing, "as someone who can't stand up to it. Don't prove it right. I know you're better than that."

He released me. I pressed my fingers to the keys and looked away, and with shaking hands I began to tap out another melody. I played with notes until I settled into a rhythm that soothed me almost as much as Hiei's harsh comforts had. He sat close enough that out shoulders touched, and his presence made me feel... safe, somehow.

"Remember," I said once my tears ran dry, "how I really messed up that one song back in the clearing?"

"Yes."

"This is it the way it's supposed to be."

I played him 'Hallelujah,' then, and made it work. When I was finished, the final notes ringing pure and true, he stood up.

"Back to your room," he said, and I did not argue.

"Will you take me back here to play more, soon?" I asked as I followed him, and I shot the piano a wistful look over my shoulder.

"No."

I stopped walking, surprised as I stood on the threshold of the junk room. Hiei turned to see why I stopped, and when he saw my stricken expression he said: "We aren't going to be here much longer," he said.

"Here?"

"At the temple."

"Oh." I paused. "Why not?"

"Seishou's gala is coming soon," he said, starting to walk. "We have preparations to take care of."

I followed him. "But, tomorrow?" I pleaded. "Surely it's not tomorrow. Can't I play then?"

He stopped again, and paused.

"Please?" I added, coming closer, and I touched his shoulder. "I... the piano, it makes me... happy. And you're..." I trailed off, unsure of what to say. What mattered to Hiei, anyway?

"Tomorrow," he said at last, and looked at me. His eyes flashed with cruel fire. "Tell no one about it, nor about what happened tonight. Understand?"

I nodded.

"Good." He turned away yet again, and this time I didn't stop him.

As he had predicted, however, my blissful rendezvous with that piano was not something meant to last.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_And with this chapter I have officially penned 100,000 words of Future Talk. That's the length of a good-sized novel. ZOMG IT'S TIME TO PARTY! (-Graphospasm sets off fireworks and wildly runs away when they start malfunctioning, leaving you, the reader, to fend for your precious self against a hoarde of vicious sparklers.-)_

_You know what's funny? I tried to rally the not-Hiei fans during the last chapter, and now look what I've gone and done. (-facepalm-) This chapter probably added fuel to their fires (pun totally intended). Also, THE POLL IS STILL OPEN! It's located at the top of my profile page for those of you who asked. =] And brace yourselves, because someone you've been missing returns next chapter... but you're not getting any hints out of me, no sir. HA!_

_I'm really bad about replying to reviews, and I feel awful about this. I tried, at one point early on, to send a message to each reviewer; a little personal note of thanks, if you will. The process was time consuming, though, and as a college student... well, you get the idea. Still, in future I am going to try to be better about giving responses to questions/compliments/critiques/crapshoots because I REALLY DO HAVE REPLIES for most of the reviews I get. And on that note, here's the list of the people who made my day during this past week! Hiei08, 0nfateswings, WickedLovelyDream, Reclun, Holy Star, ilovemusicrox12, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Kai-Chan94, Kaiya's Watergarden, chocolateluvr13, ichixichigo, lostmoonchild, rain chant, DoilyRox, Wolf-Cry-Night, TwilightFever-FutureCullen, Ookami Aya, masuyo shun, blackangelxvikkix, colbub, Panda-chan31, heve-chan, Dyani91, Anon18, j.d.y., and ShadowFireFox13!_

_Also, to you anonymous reviewers: LEAVE ME AN EMAIL ADDRESS! I want to talk to you guys, too! =D_

_I tried to make it clear that several weeks passed between the last chapter and this chapter, but in case it was missed, know this: several weeks have passed between this and the last chapter. Whoooeeee. Yay for time-skips in which nothing of note happens anyway! We're closer to the plot proper now =] Only a chapter before we learn some DEVESTATING NEWS... and, as you probably guessed, the capital letters mean it's important. =P_

_"The Phantom of the Opera" musical and its sequel, "Love Never Dies," are awesome, and they belong to Andrew Lloyd Weber (the storyline related by Dani, however, was first penned by Gaston Leroux, and if you have not read his novel you need to, NOW!). Check the musicals and books out if you've never seen/heard/read 'em! Also, there was mention of "Fireflies" by Owl City and "Hallelujah" by Jeff B., neither of which belong to me._


	23. Chapter 23: I Want to Know Your Plans

Future Talk

Chapter 23:

"I Want to Know Your Plans"

* * *

The sun beat down like a champion boxer—and that's almost-but-not-quite-a-metaphor, by the way. Just, you know, throwing that out there. Genkai claimed that it was the hottest September day in her living memory (and yes, I finally figured out which month it was, which seems like a common thing to ask but not a thing that occurs to most inter-dimensional hitchhikers; I was more worried about the _world_ I was in, not the date).

And the reason I'm talking about the sun in the first place, you wonder? Well, I'm getting to that.

To start with, I began that day as usual: waking up on my own now that Yukina had stopped coming to get me in the mornings, salvaging my breakfast from the remains of everyone else's (not that I really had to 'salvage' food, per say, because Yukina always made sure to set some aside for me in a neat little bento box) and eating my packaged breakfast in a puddle of sunshine on the porch. I had played piano with Hiei the night before, as he had promised, and I reflected on the songs as I ate. Afterward I washed my bento in the kitchen before trying to go back to my room to play with my ukelele... 'trying' being the operative word, because as I made to leave the kitchen I was intercepted by none of than everybody's favorite wind master, Jin.

"'Ello, Dani," he said as he filled up the kitchen doorway. He fidgeted on his feet, blue eyes darting over my head to look at the kitchen behind me. A few strands of hair fell over his shoulder, but he didn't seem to mind as they tickled on the skin of his bare shoulder.

"Hello, Jin," I replied, unsure of how to behave. That moment was the first time we had talked in weeks, and our awkwardness showed. Was I really that out of practice with conversation? Hiei wasn't very good himself, and he was the only one I had spoken with extensively in a while.

"Er," he said, fangs worrying his lower lip. Obviously he felt the awkwardness, too; was he remembering the time we decided not to be around each other? I knew I was. "Er, we're meetin' in the courtyard after lunch today."

I blinked at him in surprise. "Me too?" I said before I could stop myself.

"Yeah," said Jin, and he let out a sigh. His shoulders slumped. "Look, I'm sorry for not bein' around much lately."

I had noticed his recent absence; he had been missing from more than a few meals in the past weeks, but I hadn't been expecting an apology. Frankly, I didn't think I deserved one. His absence was his business, not mine.

"Oh, um, that's OK," I told him.

"I've had patrol duty, and I've been trainin' with Kenichi n' Yusuke," he went on, looking at the floor, the ceiling, anywhere but at me. "You've been alone lately, and I... well, I'm sorry. About not givin' you good company, that is."

I smiled up at him, saddened but not overwhelmed. "We both know it's for the best," I said, and I breezed past him (no pun intended). "See you at lunch," I said over my shoulder.

"Aye, that ya will!" he called after me.

Which leads us to the whole sun thing. Standing on the porch underneath a baking ball of fire, sweating like a gingerbread man in an oven... Even in partial shade I felt sweltered. You get the idea.

The idea I _didn't _get, however, was why I had to be standing there in the first place.

I wasn't alone, of course. I stood by myself while everyone else (sans Keiko, who had had to leave and go back to the school she had been uncharacteristically skipping) stood in a group at the top of the stone steps that led to the bus stop and the main highway. Hiei, the only notable exception, was not there, but I knew he couldn't be far off if this little gathering was as important as it looked.

_I'm glad I decided to wear a tanktop today,_ I thought as I felt my hair begin to cling wetly to my neck. About half an hour passed on that porch, and I was tempted to sit down or go inside, but since no one else did either I felt it would reflect badly on me.

Just when I was about to give up on waiting for whatever it was we were waiting for, Genkai cocked her head to the side (I had been watching the group for lack of a better focal point) and said something to Yusuke. The detective responded by also cocking his head, nodding, and loping off down the temple steps. A few minutes later I could see the group growing excited, and just as I was about to actually approach someone and ask what the heck was going on (really, this was the first exciting thing that had happened in weeks and the suspense was all but killing me) I saw Yusuke's head of lustrous black hair bob up the steps.

He was followed close behind by my answers, who took the forms of Kuwabara and Kurama.

I watched and tried not to let my rapidly beating heart run away with me as the two newcomers greeted their old friends, Jin in particular, whom neither of the boys had had the pleasure of welcoming when he first was summoned. Kuwabara's eyes lit up upon seeing Yukina, and after he traded a bear-hug and a back-pound with Jin and a playful punch on the shoulder with Yusuke, he looked to the small ice apparition with a broad smile. They greeted one another with formal (not to mention adorable) little bows, but when Kuwabara reached shyly for her hand she made a show of straightening the folds of her crimson obi. She had worn a pale green kimono that day, and the color suited her.

What did not suit Kuwabara was the hurt look reflected deep in his narrow eyes.

Kurama, who had followed Kuwabara in the little train of greetings formed upon the arrival of the two men, greeted the ice apparition with a soft word and a smile after he finished with the others, and then his open face clouded as he asked her a question. She shook her head and said something as the rest of the people dispersed and started to head back toward the temple, and then Kurama's eyes jumped from Yukina to the porch... and straight at me.

I smiled on reflex, but when he raised a hand in greeting I did not return the gesture. In fact, the gesture confused me. No one here took the time to greet me anymore; why did he?

"Oh, Dani-san!" Kuwabara said when he saw me. He had neared the porch with the gaggle of others, and he seemed genuinely happy to see me. "Hey, how are you? How has your stay at the temple been?"

The others, around us, tensed.

I forced a smile for their benefit, as confused with his warm greeting just as much as I was with Kurama's. "Oh, it's been fine. Welcome back. Did you have a good time at school?"

He grinned at me and jumped onto the porch. Jin followed close behind, eyes darting between me and Kuwabara for no reason I could fathom.

"Yeah, I did, actually. I got caught up in my schoolwork and even got a little bit ahead, so I have some free time for this case. Hey, have you learned any more songs on that drum?"

"Genkai-san bought me a ukelele." I glanced at the psychic, who stood nearby to monitor my interaction with Kuwabara, and I grinned. "It's really nice."

"Wow, really? Will you play me a song?"

"If you want."

"Sweet!" He glanced at Genkai and gave the back of his neck a nervous rub. "Uh, I hate to ask so soon, but is there anything to eat? I'm starved and the lunches they had on the train were icky."

"Of course," said Genkai with a smirk. "Follow me."

He turned into the temple. "Well, see ya, Dani-san!" he said, and with one final grin he was gone.

"You two're buddies," Jin said as soon the human disappeared. Oddly enough, his tone held something akin to an accusation.

"I guess," I said, not wanting to incriminate the young man, but then my thoughts of Kuwabara went away, because Kurama and Yukina had finally made their way over to us. The demon fox's gaze was trained straight on me, making the skin on the back of my arms and neck prickle. I had forgotten the expressive intensity of those eyes while he had been away... I'd even forgotten how pale his skin was next to his unreal hair, and as he came close enough for me to see his thick eyelashes and sculpted features I found myself struck with crippling self-consciousness. My hair was sweaty and gross, I'm sure my clothes were rumpled, I wore no makeup and he was just too pretty for words.

"Dani-san," Kurama said as he mounted the steps. Yukina went before him and shot Jin and I a look as she went indoors.

"Hello, Kurama-san," I said with a small bow. "How was your trip home?"

"Pleasant and much needed," he said, returning the gesture. He wore a white button-down shirt with rolled up sleeves over nice looking jeans, and the casual ensemble suited him in a weird way. "And your stay here?" At the same time it made him look like a god trying to act human, which was even weirder. I could never look that good in jeans, or anything, for that matter.

"Also pleasant," I replied. My hand tightened on my cane, nerves getting the best of me. Those eyes were the single most intent things on this planet, perhaps with the exception of Hiei's, and...

He frowned, pale forehead creasing slightly from the strain. "Why the formality, Dani-san?"

The question threw me for quite the loop. "Um," I said, feeling the skin between my shoulder blades prickle. Was it the pool of sunlight I was standing in that made me so uncomfortable? Surely that was it; of course it was.

"Good t' see ya, Kurama," Jin said, butting right in. He had been standing halfway between Kurama and I, but a little to the side so the fox demon and I could look at one another, and as he spoke he filled that gap with his body. I could only see Kurama's face over the crest of Jin's tanned shoulder. "Ya hungry? There's food in the kitchen for ya, so go on in n' eat!"

I could see the reluctance in Kurama's eyes, but since there was no way to turn down the offer without making it look like he was snubbing Jin, he stepped past the wind apparition and toward the door (ever the politician, right?). His eyes, however, looked me up and down with a sweep of forest green, and he frowned. I went a little cold when he looked over my body, and with a pang I remembered the most embarrassing fact of this entire situation: Kurama had, that day he found me in the clearing, seen me stark naked.

_How would Jin react to _that_, I wonder?_

"You're not wearing it," Kurama said, snapping me out of my inner monologue, and the appropriateness of his words when paired with what I was thinking made me blush.

"Wearing what?" I stuttered.

His smile was cool, but in a calming way. "The dress I bought you, of course. You said you'd wear it for me when I came back."

"Oh, did I?" The memory had trouble surfacing. Jin, beside me, muttered 'dress?' in a disbelieving tone of voice. I then recalled the yellow sundress Kurama had picked for me on that shopping trip of doom. "Oh!" I said. "I didn't know you were coming back today. Otherwise..."

"No one told you?" he asked, green eyes narrowing. He seemed flabbergasted by this.

"I..."

"Dani's been keepin' to 'erself lately, sortin' things out on 'er own, that she has," said Jin, swopping in to provide an explanation for this oversight.

"I see," said Kurama, eyes keeping tight to my own, and when I did not choose to elaborate on this he said: "In any case, wear the dress at dinner for me?"

"Of course," I said, feeling a bit numb.

He smiled. "Thank you." Turning, he shot Jin a smaller, colder smile I could not decipher. "See you late, Dani-san. Jin." And then he was gone, glittering eyes and cryptic expressions and all.

"You know Kurama, too?" Jin asked as soon as the fox vanished. He did not seem happy when I nodded. "How?"

"How do you think?" I said with a little more venom than necessary. Jin's offended expression made me sigh. "Kurama's the one who found me in the woods when I first got here."

"Oh." He paused. "And what dress was he goin' on about?"

"Uh..." How to sum the situation up in brief yet convincing detail? "I had to go shopping for clothes, and Kurama came as an escort and picked out a dress for me."

"And he wants ta see ya in it." It was not a question.

"Yeah. So. Um." I started to speak, realized I had nothing to say, and headed for the door with a small sigh I hoped Jin didn't hear. "I'll be in my room. See you at dinner."

"Dani-san!"

I stopped on the threshold. "Yeah?" I said, looking at him over my shoulder.

He looked away. "Nothin'," he said, and I raised an eyebrow as he jumped off the porch, zipped into the air, and disappeared from sight. Seeing him fly was an odd sight, but not one with much fanfare or pomp. He just... hovered. If you looked closely you could see a slight distortion in the air beneath him, but otherwise it appeared that he simply floated there, untouched and pure.

And, since I did not possess the ability to follow after him, I just went indoors to wait.

* * *

But I didn't have to wait long. Genkai knocked on my door a little while later.

"Oh, hello," I said when I opened the door and found her standing in the hall.

"Come with me," she said, sparing no time for pleasantries. She pivoted on her heel and stalked off, and I followed her at a slower pace she did not make pains to compensate for. As a result, I didn't pay attention to _where_ exactly she led me; it was only when she stopped that I realized we were in a hallway very near the piano room.

Genkai knocked on a wooden door, which cracked open to reveal a neat room with a table, several chairs, and a bookcase filled with tomes both old and new. Interestingly enough, that room had a window, an uncommon feature in the temple, and on a table by said window sat about two dozen pots containing various forms of plant life. White blossoms in the shape of lacy bells with throats of the palest pink hung from delicate tendrils of frothing vines; tiny yellow flowers dotted a miniature bush with leaves of a green so dark they appeared black; violet flowers with eight heart-shaped petals and brilliant orange centers stretched themselves toward the sunny window atop stalks brimming with hooked thorns. There was also a planter box holding a solid row of small bushes that bore ruddy red tea-roses no bigger than the final digit of my thumb amid its brilliantly green leaves.

It didn't surprise me to find Kurama on the other side of that door, as well.

"Come in," he said, smiling and me and Genkai in turn. I followed the psychic inside, noting the room's lack of personal effects. It seems a very clinical place for someone to live, if this was indeed Kurama's room like I thought it was, although there was a closet on the eastern wall that could very well be hiding the demon's secret items... Did he still have the age-reversal potion? Maybe it was in there!

_Stop it, _I told myself. _You're an OC, and OCs should know better than to snoop. You've read enough fanfics to know that._

My shoulders slumped.

_Then again, what OC ever listened to logic like that?_

I missed what they were saying thanks to my interest in dissecting my similarities with other fanfiction OCs. "Just leave it to me," said Kurama in response to whatever it was I missed, and with a nod Genkai walked out of the room and shut the door behind her, leaving me alone with Kurama.

Let me reiterate: she left me alone with _Kurama._

"I am to examine you," he said pleasantly. My legs felt kind of week; I was understandably nervous, especially after he said that. His evergreen eyes held a veneer of smiles and warmth, but beyond that I knew lay the single most calculating character in this fandom. The thought chilled me, because I was probably the least clever OC to ever live. "Genkai told me about the... incident."

"Did she?" I asked. "Oh. Um..."

"Please, have a seat," he said, gesturing at the table and chairs. I did so without complaint. "You experienced intense pain upon waking up from a nap, and upon investigation you had developed eyes lacking sclera, pupil, iris, or definition between any of the above. Instead, you had developed unbroken red pigmentation that overlapped all parts of your eye. Is all of this correct?"

The entire time he had been talking he had been working, as well. He had taken a black bag from beneath the plant table and set it atop the big table. From it he drew shiny medical instruments. Some I recognized—a stethoscope, a blood pressure cuff, among others—from my many days spent at a doctor's office, while others bewildered me completely. And then there were the ones that I didn't recognize but was intimidated by nonetheless. Most in that category were sharp, long, or otherwise more weapon than delicate medical tool. After he set out the tools of a doctor's trade, he pulled up a chair and sat facing me from about six inches away.

"Arm, please," he said, picking up the blood pressure cuff.

"Are you a doctor?" I asked as he squeezed the black ball connected to the cuff by a long hose. The cuff inflated, making my arm tingle as blood flow decreased from the constricting pressure.

His fingers on my wrist felt cool as they took my pulse. "Not entirely," he said.

"What's that mean?"

He made a small noise of assent before stripping the cuff off my arm. "Your heart flutters," he said.

"I have a bit of a murmur," I said, and then I repeated: "You're a doctor, then?"

"I graduated from Tokyo Universtity as a pre-med student, and I went on to complete two years of medical school." He held up a small flashlight. "I'm going to check your eyes now." When he reached for my face, I opened my eye as wide as it could go so he wouldn't have to touch me in order to do it manually.

"But you didn't finish?" I asked as he shined the light into my eye. I blinked, unable to help it, but then he put his other hand to the side of my face and I stilled.

"No abnormalities," he muttered, leaning back. "And to answer your question, no, I did not finish." There were no traces of anger in his voice (I was prying, after all), but I could see a touch of melancholy in the set of his mouth.

"Why?"

He picked up a hammer with a rubber head in the shape of a triangle and a steel grip off the table; a reflex hammer, I deduced. I'd been on the receiving end of one many a time. Luckily I was wearing shorts, so Kurama didn't have to ask me to roll up my pants before he hunched over to get a good look at my kneecaps.

Kurama started with my right knee, my good one. The taps he pressed to the soft flesh beneath my kneecap were rewarded by twitches of my muscles, one of which nearly resulted in a kick to Kurama's shin (he has good reflexes, pun intended). Then he switched to my bad leg, and his taps produced either sluggish spasms or nothing at all.

"You were born with this, you said?" he ventured as he put the hammer away.

"Yeah," I said. "So why didn't you finish medical school?"

I got a frown out of him that time. "We're here to talk about you, not me."

"But I want to talk about you. Everyone talks about me already."

He looked up at the ceiling, contemplating my words. Finally he said, with a half-smile in my direction: "I did not graduate because my step-father requested that I come work for him at his company. They had fallen into a slump and needed an extra hand."

"Demons have step-fathers?"

That sure threw him for a loop, if his 'wait, what?' face was any indication. "It's... a long story," he said, brow furrowed. "I need to test your flexibility. Please stand."

We spent a good while on stretching me in different ways. Kurama kneaded my arms and legs and spine with his fingertips, looking for abnormalities in my bone structure and joints, but given that he said nothing other than the occasional "turn around" or "bend, please" or "does this hurt at all?", I don't think he found anything amiss. It was awkward at first (how could it not be when he had too touch me so much?) but I eventually started humming to distract myself from such an uncomfortable reality. It was only when he bade me to sit again that I allowed myself to relax.

"The next item on out agenda is less medical than it is spiritual," he said, sitting back in his own chair. He rested his elbows on his knees and extended his hands, palm up. "May I have you hands, please?"

I hesitated before placing my fingertips atop his own. His fingers curled around mine like a vice, holding me fast, and then his eyes fell shut. A sensation not unlike cool water washed over my skin and bones and muscle, and with a gasp I felt it travel up my arms until it reached my torso. The feeling spilled into the cavity of my chest, a tsunami of tingling energy, and proceeded to fill up my entire body. It held me in its sway for a long time, and then it began to recede like a low tide pulled home by the moon. Kurama's voice startled me when he said something at long last.

"A body suffused in demonic energy," he said, "and a soul that resonates like a human's." His eyes opened as the last of the tingles drained away, and I noticed that the color of his eyes had faded a bit. As I watched the color returned and intensified.

"What does that mean?" I asked, breathless.

"I have no idea."

"There aren't any demons back home," I told him. "They're just fairytales, mostly religious ones, and they're all evil. Not like you or the rest of the demons here."

"And yet here you are," he said. He stood up and walked to the window; a long, pale hand caressed the tip of one of the white bell-flowers. "I have a theory about you, Dani-san. Would you like to hear it?"

My heart-rate sped up. "I suppose," I said, trying to sound neutral.

He smiled down at the flowers. "But first, a story," he said. "Do you like stories?"

"Yes."

"There once was a demon, very powerful and proud," he said. "This demon liked to steal things. It provided him with an unmatched thrill. Stealing was all he lived for." His smiled turned wry. "It was also what he died for."

_Is this the story I think it is?_ I thought.

"This demon overestimated his abilities," he went on. "He tried to steal something too well-guarded for his own good. Weakened by traps he had not expected, he was killed by the owner of the object."

"Kind of morbid, don't you think?" I said.

Kurama chuckled. "It's not over yet." He plucked a single bell-flower and held it up to the light. "This demon was sly as well as strong. He used the last of his energy to project his soul out of his dying corpse, and he went to the world of humans. Human embryos, before a certain age, lack a soul. He targeted one such embryo and possessed it, pouring his soul and power inside. He then became dormant, hiding his power and personality away so it could regather itself."

"So he lived?" I asked.

"Yes." He lowered the flower. "He knew that he would regain most of his power in ten or so years, and he planned on abandoning his family at that point. But his human mother, his surrogate parent, loved him to the point that he loved her back. She was the first person the demon ever loved, and after ten years he could not bare to leave her behind. He had developed a sort of second soul, you see, one named so as to reflect his human life, and when that personality merged with the demon's... well, the balance was a terrible one. Power and utter cruelty placed alongside love and morals."

_Oh holy crap, this is getting serious._ "Is he still alive?"

"Oh, yes." He smiled at me. "His body is human's at first glance, but his power thrums like a demon's own." He held the flower out to me, smiling. "Very much like a reversed mirror of your own, isn't it?"

As I watched, the flower's bell opened up until it lay flat, a white sun with a pink center. It pointed straight at me, and I cringed away from it. Plants that bloomed too quickly in Kurama's hands could never mean anything good for those he aimed them at.

"Well, this trusts you, at least," Kurama said.

I swallowed. "... trust?"

"Yes." He held the plant cupped between his palms and caressed its petals with a finger. "What you see here is a 'friend flower,' one of the many sentient plants that thrive in Demon World. It senses malice and closes tight against it, but it blooms for positive energy." He chuckled. "Few ever see it bloom, as you may imagine."

"I see." To my horror, however, the flower began to pull back in on itself in my demon friend's grip, pursing its lips together like a tense mother's. "Oh..."

Kurama looked at me, then, and I stared back. His hand clenched shut, and when it opened I saw a mangled white lump that leaked clear fluid like blood of glass.

"I have never seen it on my own, either," he said in a voice as soft as starlight. His eyes, on the other hand, were harder than molten rock. "Humanity has not cured me of malice. Know, Dani-san, that I will not tolerate betrayal, nor will I abide dishonesty. My trust in you is a fragile thing. Do not give me cause to break it."

My mouth gaped open, working like a fish gasping for a breath of water but only tasting air. His brilliant smile, one which banished the thunder from his gaze, made my head reel in confusion.

"We're all through in here, Genkai-san!" he called, still smiling right at me. The hand holding the ruined flower fell to his side as the door creaked open.

"Can you find your way back?" the psychic asked as she came inside.

"Oh, um... I think so," I said, still staring at Kurama. I stood, putting my weight on my cane, and I gave each of them a bow before heading for the door. "Thank you for taking care of me."

"It's nothing," Kurama said, eyes glittering in a way that said nothing about his earlier almost-a-threat. "See you at dinner. Oh, and don't forget."

I stopped with my hand on the doorknob. "Forget?"

"The dress," he said, laughing.

"Enough chitchat," Genkai snapped. "Dani, back to your room, now."

"Of course." I bowed again. "Excuse me."

I went outside, but when I turned around to shut the door behind me I caught one last glimpse of Kurama's green eyes staring in my direction.

* * *

The yellow ribbons taunted me almost as much as the lacy hemline did.

_What the heck do I do? _I thought as I looked at the dress lying innocently on my futon. Next to it I had laid out a pair of tan shorts and a violet tank top. The two outfits seemed to glare at one another with fashionable fury. _Will it seem weird to the others if I wear a dress to dinner?_

I reached out to touch the lace on the dress's bust-line, and then I withdrew my hand.

_Definitely too formal_, I thought. _I mean, I could tell them that I just felt girly or give them some other excuse, but knowing them everyone will think I'm scheming something. But what? _

I thought about it. The conclusion I came to was not a pleasant one.

_What if they think I'm trying to seduce someone? _my inner voice screamed, and my face turned the color of a tomato. _OK, that settles it, no way am I wearing that dress! _I folded the dress and put it back on its shelf, and then I got ready. Hair wet from my shower of only a few minutes prior spackled my tanktop with dark drops, but I didn't mind the way my wet curls clung to my neck and the back of my shirt.

_Kurama will be mad, though,_ I thought as I got my mirror from its spot on the bookcase and started to put my hair into its customary style. _I mean, he did ask me to wear it, and I did say that I would_...

I shot the dress, folded as it was, another long look, but as I pulled my makeup bag off of its shelf I shook my head.

_Nope, not gonna do it. Risks outweigh the benefits._ My heart sank. _Kurama's gonna be pissed though, and he's scary when he's mad. Then again, Jin would throw a tantrum if he saw me, and..._

A new thought occurred to me, and it made my blood run a little chill.

_Holy shit, I'm worrying about impressing the bishounen. If this isn't a fanfiction stereotype then I don't know what is._

I finished getting ready in a bad mood, thoughts of cliched plots and stupid, nonsensical romance filtering through my head. I had managed to salvage a working clock (the old-fashioned type with two bells on the top) from the junk in the piano room so I knew when dinner would be, and when I glanced at it I realized that I only had about ten minutes to go. The time between Kurama's check-up and dinner had passed at an aching snail's pace, and my attempts to fill up the time with my ukelele were futile at best. Taking an overly long bath had helped, of course, but only a little.

"Stupid tension, stupid anime characters," I muttered as I picked up my cane and left the room. I shut the door behind me with a smack of hand on wood, and I encountered no one on my way to the kitchen, so I considered myself lucky to not have to explain my English grumbles to whomever overheard them. Before opening the kitchen door I braced myself, took a deep breath, and checked to make sure I was ready to be seen. Everything seemed fine (I hadn't shifted at all that day) so I opened the door with a hesitant smile plastered across my face.

No one, however, was there.

I stood motionless, perplexed, before I saw the note on the table. It read: _Go to courtyard for dinner!_

"Well isn't that nice," I said sarcastically, and I jumped when a person behind me actually voiced a response.

"What did you say?"

I spun around, startled, to find none other than Kurama standing there. His eyes swept me from face to feet, and he scowled.

"The dress?" he asked.

My face colored. "Oh, um... it seemed too formal for dinner. I'm sorry."

He smiled a smile so sweet it could power a Twizzlers factory. Where had the fierce demon from earlier run off to? "I am dressed somewhat formally as well, Dani-san. Would you have me go like this alone?"

I looked him up and down, unsure of how to respond, but he was telling the truth. A nice white shirt worn open at the throat, brown slacks, a matching jacket draped over one arm... It was about as formal as my sundress, damn it all.

"If I ask politely, will you go change?" he asked, still smiling.

"Um..."

"I insist, really," he said.

"Well... I suppose." I turned to leave, hesitant to do as he asked.

"I'll go with you, of course," he said, and he slipped an arm around my shoulders just long enough to guide me out of the kitchen. "Yukina is also wearing a nice kimono this evening," he said as we swept along the passageway. "You will fit in very well, I think."

I bit my lip, unsure if I agreed, and when we got to my room I fully expected him to leave and go back by himself after he shut the door to my room behind me. I put my ear to the door to listen for his retreat, and then his voice came from just a few inches away. It scared me near spitless.

"I'm leaning on the door, Dani-san," he said, all pleasantness and silk. "I wouldn't want you getting away from me, now would I?" He chuckled. It felt less like a joke than a statement of truth.

"Um, no, we wouldn't," I said as I stripped down and stared at the dress on my shelf. _How do I get myself into these messes? _I checked my hair in the mirror after I pulled the damn thing over my head, and then I knocked on the door. It quaked a little when Kurama pushed away from it.

"You look very nice," Kurama said when he saw me. He then offered me his arm, the picture of a perfect gentleman. "Shall we?"

I started to take the arm, but he had offered the one that would hold me on my deformed side. I wouldn't be able to use my cane with my arm threaded through his own.

"Um, I can't, Kurama-san," I said, and his smile faltered. "That's my... bad side."

Eyes narrowed regretfully. "My mistake. I apologize." He dutifully held out his other arm.

I took it, too afraid to reject him a second time. "Don't mention it," I said. We started to walk, and I felt all too aware of how badly I slowed down his long-legged stride.

I snuck a glance up at his face when we were halfway to the porch. He stared straight ahead, a smile ghosting at the corners of his lips as he led us down the hall. Hair curled against his jaw, highlighting his bone structure, and I noticed that he had tied his hair back with a length of string.

_So that's how it always keeps it shape, _I thought.

He noticed my not-so-covert looks and quirked his lips at me. "What do you see?" he asked, voice light and playful.

I decided to be awkward, bold, and borderline offensive all at the same time. _Payback for making me so uncomfortable earlier, _I thought. "Has anyone ever told you that you're pretty?" I asked him, keeping my voice as deadpan as possible. "Like, really, really pretty?"

His smile became a touch more forced. "It's been brought to my attention," he said, "but I'm afraid I am rather more fond of the word 'handsome.'"

"Oh," I said. We had neared the door to the porch. "Are you sure I'm not overdressed?"

"Very." He reached out with his free hand and slid the door wide open.

Someone had set a long table up on the flagstone courtyard, and the center of it was loaded with food—all kinds, kinds I had never tasted, kinds I didn't know Yukina capable of making. Though the air was warm, a breeze blew and set my hair to stirring atop my head; it would get chilly as the night fell further, and I wished I had thought to bring a coat or something. Chairs all around the table held the people staying at the temple (sans Hiei, of course), and all of them were laughing, eating, and otherwise having a grand old time. There were five empty spots at the table far end, and Kurama helped me down the stairs and even pulled my chair out for me so I could sit.

Most of my not-quite-friends didn't look at us as Kurama sat me down next to Genkai and across the table from himself, but the aging psychic said, as I reached to fill my plate: "A dress?"

"Upon my request," said Kurama.

"I see."

"He picked it out," I added, not wanting her to think that any part of this had been my idea.

"I see," she repeated. "Well, eat, both of you."

The rest of the evening passed in a blur of the most awkward conversation I had ever, ever experienced. Most of the people were content with leaving me out of the conversation, but Kurama seemed to make a point of asking me questions and including me whenever possible. Kuwabara also held no reservations when it came to speaking with me, which led me to a rather odd conclusion.

_Has no one told him about my little eye mishap?_ It sure didn't seem like it; he wouldn't be speaking to me half so much if he knew. _But why wouldn't they tell him? I don't get it at all!_

As a result of their combined efforts, at the end of the meal I had the rather odd satisfaction of having just about everyone address me on their own at least once. And, as predicted, it did indeed get chilly, and Kurama noticed and offered me his jacket. It felt planned, really, because he didn't put the garment on even once. That didn't stop me from putting it on, though.

Anyway, dinner eventually ended, and everyone decided to help with the clean-up effort. I, however, was not assigned to carry in plates and chair with everyone else (which can be blamed on my handicap, not just the fact that no one really liked me). Rather, I was given the task of folding the extra long tablecloth. It was a little too much for me to handle effectively, however, and I struggled for many minutes as people hustled by me, laughing and talking with each other.

_Damn my short arms,_ I thought as I tried to fold it up.

"Need a hand?"

I looked up to find Kurama standing a few feet away, watching me through amused eyes. I gave him a grateful (but wary) nod before he moved to take the cloth's other end.

We folded in silence for a while before I worked up the nerve to say: "You didn't have to do that, you know?"

His eyes opened wide, innocent and clean. "Do what?"

The ignorant act irked me. "Try to include me so much. It's really OK, I don't need babying."

His head tilted to the side, perplexed. "A lack of trust does not excuse people from being civil to you," he said. We finished folding and he tucked the bundle of cloth beneath one arm.

"It is what it is," I said.

"But maybe it shouldn't be," was his enigmatic counter. He turned to go.

"Wait, your jacket!" I said, moving to take it off.

He held up a hand and smiled. "Keep it," he said. "If I need it, I'll let you know."

"But..."

He turned to go, but then he paused. Over his shoulder he said: "Oh, and Dani-san?"

I didn't say anything as we stared at one another.

"The reason I tried, this evening, to include you," he said, "has little to do with out... truce. Because if you are an enemy, I am more than certain that I could take you."

My mouth dropped open.

He smiled, eyes folding almost shut. "So please, do put up with my overtures of friendship. They will only be revoked when and if you ever betray them." His evergeen eyes glittered. "Good night, Dani-san. Sweet dreams."

He did not wait for a reply, choosing instead to leave me alone with my confusions.

* * *

For those interested, his clothing smelled of evergreen, a vague breath of mint, and something earthy and unidentifiable. It clung to my hair like an embrace until the next I scrubbed myself clean in the bath.

* * *

I retired to my room after that, making sure to hang Kurama's jacket up in the closet so it would not wrinkle. Then I settled in (after putting shorts back on; they're my natural habitat) and played with my drum a little bit. I had neglected it as of late, favoring the ukelele's versatility.

My playing didn't last. Genkai burst into my room after a bit, and in her hands she carried a medium-sized duffel bag. She tossed it into my lap without ceremony.

"We leave for the cottage in a few days," she said. "Be ready to leave on a moment's notice."

I set the drum aside. "When, exactly?"

"We're playing it by ear."

I didn't feel like it was a bad moment to go fishing, so to speak. "Are you moving the Book soon?"

"Never you mind," she snapped. "That's our business, not yours."

But that was all the answer I needed, and as she left I felt the bottom drop out of my stomach. I hadn't prepared enough, I hadn't planned what to do, because soon—too soon—the thing I needed to stay near at all costs was going to vanish into air so thin it put Yukina's masterful crepes to shame.

I wanted—no, I _needed_—to know their plans.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Some of you may have noticed that I made changes to the summary of this story. Was that for better or for worse, in your opinion? Thoughts are appreciated to the Nth degree!_

_Well... Kurama. Fierce, unpredictable, and odd. Gotta love 'im. Also, Kuwabara is so fun! I missed him so much ^^ Unfortunately, another separation is looming large. Whoops. This one's much shorter though! And a HUGE DEVELOPMENT I mentioned last time is only a chapter away. ACK! STAY TUNED!_

_Kurama is out-placing Jin in the relationship poll (they were in a tie, previously). Hiei is still winning by a wide margin. VOTE! Please? Also, Jin = jealous. Or at least protective. Ho hum?_

_Title credit goes to Say Anything. "I Want To Know Your Plans" is the song my boyfriend played to me to get me to date him, so it's special in my heart. ^_^ If you like acoustics, you should like it a lot. _

_Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Panda-chan31, ichixichigo,WickedLovelyDream, crossyourteez, Kaiya's Watergarden, Kai-Chan94, rain chant, Miss Meow, j.d.y., Holy Star, 0nfateswings, ilovemusicrox12, chocolateluvr13, Reclun, DoilyRox, Aicirret, Wolf-Cry-Night, Jade elf, masuyo shun, heve-chan, StrawberryxXxKisses, kakashisfuturewife, Foxgirl Ray, and Ephemeral Muse ARE ALL AWESOME PEOPLE WHOM I ADORE BEYOND ALL REASON. Have I mentioned lately that you are all far too good for me and that I don't deserve you?_


	24. Chapter 24: Into the Night

Future Talk

Chapter 24:

"Into the Night"

* * *

The next morning saw a great change in the number of people at the temple. I didn't know this when I woke up, but all it took was a look at Yukina's tense shoulders to tell me that something—and a big something, at that—had changed.

I had risen early for whatever reason. She stood by the stove, cooking breakfast with the sleeves of her kimono rolled up past her elbows. We were alone in the kitchen, weak sunlight inching through the window above the sink. The room was more dim than was its typically cheerful standard. I didn't like it at all.

"Good morning," I told Yukina as I sat down at the table. I put my cane in the chair next to me.

She smiled over her shoulder. "Hello, Dani-san."

She turned back to her work, still tense. I decided to cut straight to the chase and not edge into everything I wanted to ask her. That tension was just too drawing.

"Did Genkai make you pack last night?" I said.

Yukina paused, something simmering in a frying pan with a hiss. That sibilant sound hung on the air, snakelike, as Yukina nodded.

"Most of the boys are gone," she said. "Genkai went with them to secure the Book in the city. We'll be leaving for the cottage tonight."

Her words stunned me into momentary silence. "She told me that we'd move in a few days," I said.

But Yukina shook her head. "Tonight. She'll join us at the cottage later. The boys will stay in the city with the Book until the party."

I processed this. Yukina had spilled basically everything about what I wanted to know in one fell swoop, but it didn't help that I was stranded at the temple with no way to get to the Book.

_Fat lot of good that knowledge does me,_ I thought sourly, and then the kitchen door opened. A massive yawn heralded the arrival of Kuwabara and Kenichi, the latter of whom was clad in a pair of pajamas. Kuwabara had had the foresight to get dressed in jeans and a white cut-off shirt.

"Smells great!" Kuwabara said as he came into the kitchen. He approached Yukina, cheeks pinkening a bit as he did so, and then he asked: "Is there anything I can help you with, Yukina-san?"

I expected a warm smile and a nod, but the ice apparition just turned away. "Everything is fine, Kuwabara-san," she said. I wondered, in the back of my mind, why she didn't refer to him as 'Kazuma.' The sudden formality seemed... off, somehow.

Kenichi pulled up a chair to my right. "Hey, Dani-chan," he said, yawning again as he pillowed his head on the tabletop. "Will you hang out with me and Kuwabara today? It's just us and I know we'll probably start to get bored around lunchtime."

I smiled, thinking:_That, and that no one is around to tell you to keep away from me, eh?_But I knew that saying that would be inappropriate, so I kept quiet. "Sure thing," I told him, and he grinned.

Kuwabara, after hesitating behind Yukina with a hurt expression, sat down across from me at the table. He did his best to regain his cheerful attitude, but I could still see remnants of pain in his eyes.

"Did Yukina tell you about what's happening today?" he asked me with uncharacteristic melancholy. Then he smiled, a bit of the old Kuwabara peeking through the grim new one. "Good morning, by the way."

"Good morning to you too." I grinned. "She told me that everyone else is in the city and that we're going to go to the cottage tonight. Miss anything?"

He shrugged. "They left in the middle of the night last night. Genkai should be back tonight. We're going to wait for her before we make the move to the cottage."

"We can't just go now?" I asked. I fidgeted. "Sitting around is making me twitchy."

His laughter made me feel self conscious, but I knew that he wasn't really laughing _at_ me. He was too nice for that.

"The cottage isn't exactly friendly to visitors," he explained. "Genkai's the only one who can dismantle all the curses she put on it. She's pretty territorial when it comes right down to it."

"I can tell," I said, trying not to look perturbed at the thought of Genkai-designed booby traps.

Yukina finished and served breakfast soon after that. Conversation was stilted; Yukina seemed quite intent on not allowing Kuwabara to rope her into speaking with him—or anyone, for that matter. She didn't try to talk to Kenichi or me, either, which was odd, and I felt an utterly out of place (and yet somewhat ironic) coldness radiating from her every move. It was perplexing, to say the least, and by the time we all finished our food I was more than ready to bid such an awkward breakfast adieu.

"Well," said Kuwabara as Yukina began to clean up the dishes without a word. "I guess I'll go outside and train Kenichi some."

"Sounds fun," the kid muttered, sending a confused glance Yukina's way.

"I'll help clean up," I said, and Kuwabara shot me a very loaded look.

_Can you figure out what's wrong with her?_his eyes seemed to plead. _Please? I can't stand this._

I nodded while Yukina's back was turned and shot him a thumbs-up. His grin made me smile back on reflex, and he and Kenichi left without another word.

I picked the dishes up off the table and stacked them; then I balanced them in the crook of my elbow and carried them to the sink. Yukina gave me a half-hearted smile before dumping the plates and bowls and cups into the tub of soapy water.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," she murmured as she began to scrub at a bowl with a sponge.

"See what?" I asked. _Maybe if I play dumb she'll talk about it,_ I thought.

Red eyes stared down at slick plates. The soap bubbles that slid down their sides shone like iridescent gems in the light from the window. I noticed that clouds had obscured the blue of the sky, painting it with a solid blanket of gray.

"See... me being so cruel to Kuwabara," she said as she handed me the bowl to be dried.

I wiped the object down and set it on the counter. "And why would you do a thing like that?" I asked, taking a plate from her.

Her hands moved as if they were on autopilot, but her eyes were so far away that I knew she wasn't really concentrating. Her mouth drew itself into a short, thin line, and that's when I noticed that her rose-petal eyes were swimming in...

"Hey, don't cry!" I said, dropping my plate on the counter so I could touch her shoulder. "Yukina-san, I'm sure it's OK, whatever it is, and I'm sure you didn't meant to hurt Kuwabara, and—"

"No," she said, putting her soap-covered hands to her face. Her voice shook like leaves in a strong breeze. "No, I did hurt Kuwabara. I feel horrible. I'm an awful person, Dani-san!"

I shook her shoulders in my hands and turned her to face me. "Yukina-san, I—"

"You don't understand!" she wailed, hands clenching tighter around her face. "I'm _trying_to hurt him!"

Suffice to say that _that_sure threw me for a loop. I stopped, stared, blinked a few times, and asked: "You were what, now?"

She peeked out from between her fingers, but luckily for me she hadn't shed any tears. "You think I'm awful, don't you?" she said in a quavering voice, eyes disappearing again.

"I didn't say that," I was hasty to assure her. "I just... well, I'm a little confused."

Yukina's shoulders shuddered as she suppressed a sob. "Oh, I know that," she said bitterly.

"So can you explain?"

She hesitated behind her pale hands, but then she lowered them. Her jaw was set in a way I had never before seen—there was sorrow in the curl of her lips, but resolution in the depths of her eyes. Pain, too, pain I didn't understand.

"Can we sit down?" she asked.

I nodded, smiled, and picked a chair. She sat next to me, drying her damp hands and face—wet from the dishwater—on her sleeve. I didn't push her or pry for information, because if what she was going to tell me was as agonizing as she was making it out to be, I knew from personal experience that she wouldn't want me to pry. If having an awkward medical history has taught me one thing, its that stares and too many intrusive questions are never, ever welcome.

She lingered over cleaning herself up, and then she folded her hands in her lap and stared at them. I sat facing her, sideways in my chair as she faced the tabletop, and when she spoke she did not look at me.

"I know I probably shouldn't be telling you this," she said, "but Keiko-san doesn't understand, and Genkai isn't very sympathetic, and... I need to talk to someone who might get me." She looked at me. "I think that person might be you."

I opened my mouth to thank her—being thought well of was certainly something new—but she held up a hand to quiet me.

"I heard you talking to Jin a few weeks ago," she said. I felt my pulse quicken in my chest. "I needed a cup of tea that night, and when I passed by on the way to the kitchen I stopped to listen." She offered me an apologetic smile. "Forgive me for eavesdropping."

"It's fine," I said, reliving the memory. It was not a pleasant one. "I don't get why that makes me a good listener, though."

She looked back at the table. "You," she said, "told Jin to stay away from you for his own sake. That took courage, courage I don't have to say as much to Kuwabara."

_Um, what?_ My jaw went slack. "B-but Kuwabara-san... he adores you!" I stuttered. "I haven't been here for very long but I think it's pretty obvious!" That was kind of a lie considering that I had very nearly spied on them by watching the Yu Yu Hakusho anime, but Yukina didn't need to know that.

"I know," she said with a sigh, shoulders slumping. "I pretend to be oblivious, hoping he'll give up on me, but it's no use."

"I still don't understand," I persisted. My Yu Yu Hakusho knowledge did not cover a reluctant Yukina.

She took a very deep breath, straightened her back, and stared ahead of her. "What do _you_know of demons?" she asked. For a second I thought she was mocking me, but then I realized that her tone was more curious than derisive.

"Um..." I wracked my brain for a suitable answer. "I know they're from Demon World?"

"Biologically, I mean."

"Um..." I got thrown for yet another loop with that one. "They're a different specie than humans, I guess."

She nodded. "The human race, as Kurama-san explained to me, is one specie. No subspecies—races, yes, but no actual subspecies. The demon specie, however, contains tens of thousands of subspecies, one of which I am."

"So Kurama and Hiei and Jin are demons, but they're all different species of demon from both you and each other," I said, to clarify. "Unrelated and stuff."

"That is correct. I am what is known as a Koorime, an ice maiden." She raised one hand and studied her palm, and as I watched it filled with a globe of blue-white light. My skin broke out in gooseflesh when the air around us grew cold.

"So... ice, huh?" I said, and the light vanished. Warm, sticky air flooded back around me.

Yukina's fist clenched. "There are other ice demons in Demon World," she said, "but none quite like the Koorime. We are all women. We live on an isle in the sky, safe from the eyes of men." She looked at me, sad again. "And I really do mean safe. Should men have easy access to us, our race would die out."

"Die out?"

"Yes. Every one hundred years a Koorime enters her fertile period, and if she remains untouched by a man during the period she will give birth to a baby girl. Always a girl, a full blooded Koorime."

_Why do I feel like Hiei's gonna come up soon?_ I thought. _Ah, well. Might as well get that over__with._ "And if she is touched by a man in that fertile period?" I asked.

"Then she gives birth to twins," Yukina said, and the muscles in her neck and jaw twitched, straining through her pale skin. "One will always be a girl, the chosen Koorime the mother would have had regardless, and the other will always be a boy, half a Koorime and half something else." Her breathing hitched. "The boy..."

I said nothing, waiting.

Her confession came out in a rush of despairing breath. "Koorime aren't meant to bear a child not born of ice. It's anathema to our pure beings, like introducing a spark to a pile of dry wood. When we have a normal child, a pure child, it buds off of our own energy to form a brand new being, with no harm done to the mother. But to provide the ice half to the foreign baby, a baby who has no real tie to being an ice demon or even a _female_, the mother has to..." She cut off, and I noticed that her breathing had gone erratic. When she didn't continue, I decided she needed just a little bot of prompting.

"The mother has to... what?" I asked.

Her lips pressed into a thin line as her eyes met mine. "The mother has to provide twice as much energy because there are two children, and she must sacrifice her own glacial power to do it." She said the next phrase in a single rush of breath. "In the process of providing the necessary power to form the boy and protect the girl from her brother's impure spirit she must sacrifice her own life energy. She kills herself."

My jaw dropped. _That wasn't in the anime,_I thought. _Rui killed herself after Hiei got banished!_ But then I remembered the manga. In that version of events, Rui had indeed been one of many women who died after having a man's baby. Fanfics tended to forget the manga's story, and so had I until Yukina reminded me.

_So is the manga more canon than the anime?_I thought, but then I saw that Yukina had bowed her head and I banished my inner monologue.

"My mother was with a man during her fertile period," she said, voice shaking, "and she had me and my brother and died to do it. Kuwabara-san is a wonderful man, but I'm nearing my fertile stage, my first one, and I..." She looked up at me. "Kuwabara-san is a wonderful, kind man, Dani-san. But if I were to return his affections and agree to be his... well, wife, I would never be able to provide him children." Her head drooped even lower. "He wants children. You should see him with Kenichi. I could never take that away from him."

I stared at her for a minute, feeling my stomach knot into a cold, guilty little ball. Yukina had said I would understand her because of what I'd said to Jin—but that wasn't the whole story of why I understood her. Far from it. A secret of mine, one I had never spoken of aloud to anyone except for my old best friend, Lauren, and my parents…

I pushed the thoughts aside. I didn't want to remember that. It would only make me sad, and I needed to help Yukina, not throw myself a pity party.

"I'm sure that, if he loves you like I think he does, that he won't mind so much," I said, reaching for Yukina's shoulder. "And you can always have a baby girl that he would consider his own child. You would be the one to bear it, after all."

Eyes like blood make me pull back. "I can't do that!" she said, and a single tear slipped from the corner of her eye. It glittered in the half-light and shone brilliantly before falling to her lap with a soft 'plop.' "A Koorime's fertile time lasts for twenty years! During that I won't be able to let him... touch me, for fear of getting me pregnant." Her obvious discomfort was palpable, but she kept at it. "Can you imagine—for the next ten years I will be unable to bear children, and during that time I doubt Kuwabara-san will want to marry me considering that he has two more years at university as well as graduate school after that, and he'd never touch me before we were married, so by the time we are married I'll _really_ be untouchable, and can you image twenty years of marriage without—"

"Yukina-san!" I said as her babbling started to repeat itself. "Have you explained all of this to Kuwabara?"

She shook her head, dry sobs covered by the hands she kept pressed to her mouth.

"Maybe you should," I told her. _I know I would tell my… no, don't go there…_

She shook her head, still shaking.

"Why not?" When she didn't answer, I added: "Yukina, avoiding him won't solve your problems."

"I know," she whispered.

"Then talk to him. He's a great guy, you said it yourself—he'll understand."

She looked up with eyes filled with something that was almost hope, but wasn't. Her cries, which had produced no more than that first tear, tapered off.

"I don't think so," she said.

"You don't, but I do." I smiled and reached out to take her hands into my own. They felt incredibly cold but I held on anyway. "Maybe think about talking to him about everything. After this case wraps up or something, so you don't distract him."

"I," she said, and paused. "I don't want to, though."

"Just think about it, OK?" I told her. "Pushing him away won't do anything but hurt him, but don't beat yourself up over this. You're doing what you feel is best for Kuwabara, right?"

She nodded, with no real conviction, but I could see that she had composed herself once again.

"Do you feel better after talking about it?" I asked.

She nodded again and offered me a weak smile.

"Well, that's good. If you need to talk again, let me know." I stood up. "Now how about those dishes? Kenichi wanted me to go play outside soon and I shouldn't keep him waiting."

Yukina stood up, too, looking a lot less stressed than she had during breakfast. "I understand," she said. "Shall I wash again, and you dry?"

Grinning, I said: "Sounds like a plan."

I left the kitchen after we cleared the sink of the dirty plates and cutlery. When I turned to shut the door behind me, cane tapping like falling tears on the wooden floor, I saw Yukina sitting at the table, rolling the gem produced by the single tear she'd cried for Kuwabara between her thumb and forefinger, staring, like it held all the answers in the world and none of her sadness or pain.

* * *

Kuwabara was sitting on the edge of the porch, watching Kenichi practice karate forms (or something of that sort; I'm no fighter) in the center of the courtyard. Black clouds threatened rain and filled the air with sweltering humidity and crackling power, like the lightening that hadn't yet broken was preparing the air for its descent by charging it with motes of tense electricity. I felt my hair frizz out from the heat, the wet, and the charge, but I didn't attempt to tame it with my hands as I sat next to Kuwabara. That would surely be a losing battle.

"Keep your back straight!" Kuwabara yelled at the young boy when he started to slouch in the middle of a spinning kick. He turned to me and confided: "Yusuke's been teaching him basic fighting form, but since he never had formal instruction he doesn't really know what he's doing. Don't tell him I said that, though."

"It's a secret." He looked relieved. "You had formal training?"

"Yup." He smiled up at the porch roof. "Yusuke and me go way back. During middle school we fought a lot, but I could never beat him so I enrolled at a dojo to get a leg up on him. Didn't really work, though; Yusuke's got this demon ancestor who gives him superpowers."

"That's pretty cool," I said. "The dojo part, I mean, although I guess the demon part's neat, too. I just wish I could do sports." I rubbed the back of my neck, embarrassed. "I'm jealous of you, I guess."

"Hey, I'm jealous of that music of yours," he shot back. "Be grateful for your own gifts instead of longing after other people's."

At first I thought he was insulting me, but then I actually thought about how wise those words were. Coming from a person like Kuwabara, a mere human amid a gaggle of incredibly powerful demons, I'm sure he'd told himself that piece of advice more than a few times before.

"Can I ask you something?" I asked.

He seemed perplexed. "Sure."

"Why are you being so nice to me?" When his face registered shock, I quickly added: "I asked Kurama the same thing and he said that if I turned out to really be an enemy that he was certain he could outwit be before I hurt someone." When Kuwabara just looked at me with a blank expression, I said: "Surely they told you about my eye incident, right?"

He didn't look too happy at that. "Are you suggesting that they would keep me in the dark?"

I hesitated.

"Look, I get it," he said, a touch of bitterness in his voice making him look away, "I'm the weakest out of all of us and they might leave me out of stuff. Like I bet you're thinking that the only reason I got left behind at the temple when everyone else went with the Book is because I'm weak. That's it, isn't it?"

I didn't want to admit it, but I suspected that Kuwabara was just as ill-treated in real life as he was in the anime. "Well..."

"They told me about what happened, just to clear things up for you," he said. I went still. "But I think I'm a pretty good judge of people, Dani-san, and I think you're OK. I said it when we first met and I still say it now. I'm nice to you regardless of some stupid eye thing."

"... oh."

"And, for the record, they did use to leave me out a lot," he said, face going momentarily sour, "but I told them off after an incident that almost got me killed thanks to them leaving me in the dark, and they don't do that anymore." He smiled, obviously having forgiven me for my offenses. "The only reason why I got chosen to stay with you and Yukina is because I have a driver's license."

Wait, _what_?

"Kurama can drive, but Yusuke can't," he said by way of explanation. He looked like a teacher explaining something to a particularly bright student. "Jin and Hiei are demons and never had a chance to learn. The cottage is a long walk away, so someone who could drive needed to stay to get you there. I didn't want to leave Yukina and Kurama knows a lot more about making energy seals than I do, so I was the logical choice to get left behind."

"That makes sense." We sat in silence. "I'm sorry I made it seem like you were... _less_than the others. It's just you were so nice, and got left, and..."

"Hey, you would have been right six months ago," he said, brow furrowing. "Don't sweat it."

I smiled at him and gently punched him in the shoulder. "Thanks. For being my friend and taking my shenanigans in stride, that is."

"Hey, like I said, I'm a good judge of character." He chortled a bit, obviously pleased with himself, but then his face clouded over.

"Anyway," he said. I could tell he wanted to ask me something but was having trouble doing it. "So, um... Yukina?"

I hesitated, thinking of what I could say, and then I said: "She has a lot on her mind right now and it's making her tense. But she's not the type to pin her troubles on others, so it's made her a bit touchy. Just be patient with her and she'll come around."

He let out a sigh of relief. "Oh thank god. I was afraid I'd done something wrong." He scowled. "Put your shoulders into it, Kenichi!"

The boy in the courtyard bent over from the waist and leaned over, hands on his knees and panting. "Can't I rest a while?" he whined.

Kuwabara sighed. "I guess so." He perked up, looking at me. "Hey, how about a song or two? I haven't heard you sing in ages!"

I smiled right back. "It would be my pleasure, my friend," I said, and I went to fetch the ukelele.

* * *

Rain still hadn't broken by the time we loaded our things into the rickety old pickup kept in a shed down by the highway. Genkai had left a packed bag for herself behind, and we covered mine, Yukina's, Genkai's, and Kenichi's things with a tarp in the vehicle's rusty bed. Kenichi wanted to ride in the bed with the suitcases, but I (with Yukina's help) would not stand for that. So we all crammed into the three-person cab and got on our way, all of keeping our eyes on the cloudy sky. Thunder rumbled above the whirr of the engine.

"I sure hope Genkai gets to the cottage before the rain starts," Kuwabara muttered, hands clenched around the steering wheel. "Waiting around in a storm won't be much fun."

"Yeah, it's pretty cramped in here," Kenichi said, sandwiched between Yukina and I. "And hot, and sticky. Damn rain."

"Language, Kenichi!" said Yukina.

Kenichi sulked.

We drove for an hour, said the dim clock on the dash. Winding country roads along cliffs and through shadowy paths beneath canopies of trees, over a rocky stretch of barren ground and grassland, then along the coast above a hundred foot drop down to crashing waves and jagged boulders... we went through so many landscapes that I lost track of which way we went, but eventually the paved road tapered off into gravel and we found ourselves going through a field of dry green grass the height of the car door. Eventually we found yourself at the top of a very short cliff, at the base of which was a crescent of white sand bordered by crystal blue water. And, at the top of the cliff on an upraised outcropping of bare rock, stood the cottage.

In reality, it was more like a pavilion than a cottage. It had the typical Shinto/Japanese style, with four beveled plains of roof that swopped down and out and met at the top. Gold trim, red tile roof, wooden folding doors on all side but one, a porch, upraised with a gap of space underneath...

"Guess there isn't much by way of plumbing," I said as the car pulled up to the cottage.

"Correct," said Yukina.

"Pretty, though," said Kuwabara, squinting at it, and then he looked excited. "Genkai's here!"

I squinted, too, and saw the psychic sitting on the porch with a pipe between her teeth. Another glance alerted me to the beat-up sedan to the pavilion's right. We maneuvered next to it and Kuwabara cut the engine. Then we all piled out and started grabbing bags, and when we all carried our shares up to the porch (with me trailing last, ukelele wrapped in a blanket to keep it away from the wet air) Genkai stood up to meet us.

"You're late," she said. She was wearing city clothes, oddly enough, which I was unused to. It made her look more..._normal,_ somehow, like her odd hair and buzzing aura weren't nearly as unreal as you might think.

"Aren't you early?" said Kuwabara, raising an eyebrow.

"A psychic is never early," said Genkai. "Or late, for that matter. I get there exactly when I need to."

_Oh my god, she just almost quoted Gandalf,_ I thought, but before I could break down into a fit of hysterical giggles the door nearest to us folded clean out of the way. And from the darkness within bounded none other than... Botan?

_Wait, what?_

"Hello, everyone!" she said, smiling from ear to ear. She wore a pair of high-waisted jeans and and suspenders along with a pink plaid button-down shirt, reminiscent of her Dark Tournament costume, but her smile was common to all episodes and chapters I'd ever seen.

"Botan-san!" said Yukina, pleased just as much as she was flabbergasted. She ran up the cottage step's and hugged the grim reaper tightly around the shoulders. "Why are you here?"

"Oh, business," she said, shrugging. But her eyes twinkled, so I knew she had more to say. "Koenma-san will be arriving once we're all settled in."

"Koenma?" Kenichi said.

"Oh, yes," said Botan. Then she looked at me. "The allotted month is up, Dani-chan, and I believe you and Koenma struck a deal, didn't you?"

Everyone turned to stare at me.

"Deal?" Kenichi murmured, tugging on my shirttail.

I swallowed. "I'd forgotten," I said, and I had never felt more naked in my life.

My memory lapse lasted only a few minutes, and when I remembered what Koenma was coming to discuss with me—my homeland, that is—my mind and pulse started to race one another. No one seemed to notice, though, and they continued to pull suitcases out of the trunk and cart them into the house. I attempted to blend in by doing the same, and strangely enough that seemed to work.

My biggest concern, however, was not the bags. I was too preoccupied with thoughts of getting back near the Book to care.

I saw it like this. My homeland—namely, America—did not exist in this world. Therefore, Koenma could not have found anything, and he would accuse me of having lied to him. This, of course, was the truth, and it could never end well seeing as how I was mired in so many lies as it was (and discussion of said lies could only result in discovery, thanks to my lack of cleverness). This being the case, my reasoning dictated that I needed to avoid having my discussion with Koenma for as long as possible—by putting it off I was...

I sighed internally.

_I'm not accomplishing anything by putting it off,_I said. _I'm only running away._

But then the pro-procrastination side of me whispered, _it's not like anyone trusts you right now, Dani. Go, protect the Book however you can, and prove yourself before Koenma outs this lie you told. That way the sting of your talk with him will be blunted by your heroism._

Not that I'm any sort of hero, mind you, but I did think the little voice had a point with the whole blunting thing. Still, I found myself torn over my options.

Run away to the Book?

Or:

Stand and face the music.

When we finished unloading, all bags stored safely in the cottage, everyone gathered on the porch as if we were waiting for something. But then Kenichi commented on how his feet hurt (not that we'd even done that much walking, really), so Yukina suggested we move inside to sit down. Just as Botan pulled aside the folding wooden doors, revealing a bare wood floor with a firepit in the center and a bedding chest in one corner, the rain decided to pour. Lightening lit up the sky; thunder made my hair crackle with wet heat and energy.

"Good timing," Genkai said, staring at the sky from her view on the porch. We all shuffled past her, away from the rain veiling the edge of the porch like a liquid curtain. I could smell the salty air rising up from the nearby sea, undercut by the scent of ozone, and over the sound of the rain I heard the crash of waves on rocks and sand. But then the doors closed behind me, swallowing my senses in dark and damp, and the scents and sounds dulled.

Despite the muggy heat and the sweat we worked up by carrying all the bags into the gloomy cottage, someone had kindled a few glowing coals in the firepit in the center of the floor. An earthenware pot hung over the fire on a metal hook. Steam drifted from its spout in slow, undulating streams. I tugged on the collar of my t-shirt and said: "Stuffy, huh?"

"Tell me about it," Kuwabara muttered.

A gasp made me jump; the inside of the cottage was very still so the sound seemed very out of place. I turned to look at Botan; she stood close to the door. Her eyes were open wide and when she saw everyone staring at her she blushed.

"I forgot something," she said, and opened the door again. "Be back in a little while!" Then she disappeared into the rain.

"What was that all about?" I murmured.

"Dunno," said Kuwabara. He looked at his watch, eyes squinting through the gloom. There were no electric lights in the cottage. "Oh, wow, it's late."

"Should you go?" Genkai asked, gruff as usual.

"Yeah."

My head—still swimming in half-baked plans—homed in on a new possibility. "I'll walk you out!" I said.

Everyone looked up at me, as I was still standing by the door and all the others had chosen to sit down.

"Aw, thanks, Dani-san," Kuwabara said. He grinned. "You like rain or something?"

"Yeah, actually." I smiled back. "It'll cool me off. It's hot in here. Also, I need to use the... well, the bathroom." I didn't, not really, but...

Kuwabara blushed a little at that, which made me smile. I also noticed that Yukina tensed a little at our exchange, though she did take great pains to hide it.

Genkai reached out to pick up the teapot, and she inhaled a breath of steam before saying: "If you catch pneumonia, don't come crying to me." She lifted a mug from the side of the firepit and poured herself a splash of tea. "There isn't any plumbing out here. Can it wait til the storm breaks?"

"Uh, no," I said.

She smirked. "It's located in a copse of trees to the north of here. Can you show her, Kuwabara?"

"Sure," he said, and we walked back out onto the porch. "This way," he said, and he led me off the porch and into the rain. It soaked through my shirt in seconds, but the water was warm and not at all chilling. The ground, however, didn't like my cane and foot, and I slipped many times before Kuwabara and I rounded a small group of aspen trees and saw a wooden hut a few meters away.

"There it is," he said, pointing, and he turned to go. "Think you can make it back on your own?"

"Yeah," I said. I smiled. "See you soon, then."

_Maybe,_ I thought as I waited for him to leave, _I can steal the truck and drive to the Book. Only, I'd get lost on my way there, probably. Ugh. That'll never work._

I was startled from my thoughts by Kuwabara. "Thanks for talking to Yukina," he was saying in a voice he had to raise over the sound of the rain. Thunder boomed overhead. "I mean it."

I forced a smile, blinking water from my lashes. "No problem. Have a safe trip."

"Thanks." His serious expression made the simple word ring true; no more words needed to be passed between us. He shoved his hands into his jeans and started going back the way he had come; the rain plastered his hair to his face and neck in small streams of coppery brown, and when he got a good distance away I began to follow him as fast as I could, counting on the rain to cover any sounds I made.

_Dani, what the hell are you doing?_ I thought as we walked—me following Kuwabara close behind—back by the cottage. I stood in its shadow, still undiscovered as I was, and I watched him open the truck door, climb into the cab, and start fiddling with his keys. But the engine wouldn't catch and Kuwabara had to get out of the truck, go to the front, and pop the hood to take a look at what could have gone wrong with the cranky engine.

That was when I noticed the blue tarp—the one we had used to protect our bags from the rain—fluttering in the pickup's bed. Before I knew what I was doing I had crossed over to the truck on quiet feet, and with held breath I hopped up on the fender (I was small enough not to rock the car from my sudden weight) and I slowly climbed into the bed. Water sluiced everywhere, running beneath and above the tarp at once, but I didn't care as I shimmied beneath the plastic sheet.

_He didn't see me,_I thought, heart in my mouth and wet hair on my cheeks. _The hood covered me when I got in the truck, right?_

I could barely hear Kuwabara's frustrated mutterings over the sound of the rain, but eventually I felt the vibration of him shutting the hood and opening the cab door. He didn't shout my name or rip the tarp away from my huddled body, and when I heard the engine catch and felt the car actually start to move, I thought: _Did that seriously just work? Really? Did the single most stupid, oh-look-I'm-totally-winging-it scheme in the entire history of existence just_succeed_?_

And, as the car trundled off into the night, I realized with a sense of extreme satisfaction that it had.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Now you know why Kuwabara is so damn nice, why Yukina doubts their relationship, and why Kuwabara is just generally a really great person who takes everything in stride. I love that guy! I wish we could see more of him than we do =[_

_And yes, the manga does hold that the the Koorime mother who mates with a man dies in childbirth without fail. I like that version of events than the dumbed-down anime version. It's much more... morbid. More potential for drama, you know?_

_The next chapter... is the big one, the one I've been hinting at. So can this chapter be considered a cliffhanger? I suppose so. Hope you like it!_

_Thanks-a-million to my reviewers! Kai-chan94, White Rose Fox, kakashisfuturewife, ichixichigo, colbub, Reclun, TheWhiteTigerAllia, ilovemusicrox12, 0nfateswings, Kaiya's Watergarden, crossyourteez, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., WickedLovelyDream, Blue-Eyed-Demon, Foxgirl Ray, rain chant, SageofAges729, AkaMizu-chan, DoilyRox, BurningBodiesLikeIBurnBridges, Panda-chan31, rubyparker93, NayNaybby, Naitza-Kururugi, masuyo shun, heve-chan, cassie, Torin Jingles, and Anon18!_


	25. Chapter 25: Falling

Future Talk

Chapter 25:

"Falling"

* * *

Being miserably cold and uncomfortably wet is unpleasant business, and the unpleasantness only increases when you're both wet and cold _and_ scared, bouncing along over an uneven road with your heart in your mouth, the ribs on the bed of an old pickup gouging your hipbones with every jarring jerk. From personal experience, I know—and excuse me for the following statement; it's unforgivably crude—I know that this sucks more than a hooker with a Hoover.

I also happen to know for a fact, once again from personal experience, that such a scenario is more bearable when you have like-minded company lying next to you in said pickup bed.

_Wait,_you might be thinking. _Wait,__what?_

The discovery that I was not alone went something like this. I climbed into the pickup bed, waited for Kuwabara to start off down the road, and I then wrapped a portion of the tarp around myself and started rolling, hoping to curl up in the sheet to keep even more rain from soaking me (not that I wasn't already half drowned; even my underwear was saturated with rainwater). However, as I rolled myself up like a Dani-flavored burrito, I encountered a resistance that stopped my efforts cold. It was like the other end of the tarp was stuck under something (a rogue suitcase, maybe? It was certainly heavy), but I heaved at it anyway and tried to untrap it. It didn't work. Since I'm a small person I ended up getting pitched _toward_ the obstacle holding down the tarp when we encountered a particularly vicious bump in the road, so I really had no choice but to face it head on. I rolled once, out of control, toward the other side of the bed, and I found myself plastered against a lump separated from me by only a few layers of plastic sheet._What__the__heck__is__this?_ I thought. It was a mushy lump, one with a lot of give but also a lot of resistance, definitely not a suitcase, it was much too _fleshy_, somehow, and...

The lump squeaked.

_Oh,__fuck_, I thought, scooting backward as fast as I could, but then the lump started moving—I could see the blue plastic twitching when occasional bursts of lightning lit us up, and I could hear the sheet rustle above the thunder and rain and the engine and wheels—and hands emerged from a cocoon of tarp. A pale face topped by a shock of tangled, dripping, and oddly-colored hair followed after. Their eyes seemed like black holes set in alabaster as they shined wetly in the dark.

"Dani-chan?" the lump-that-had-turned-into-a-person said, voice sounding just as flabbergasted and frightened as I felt.

I squinted through the dark and the rain, blinking water from my eyes as I tried in vain to see my riding buddy, but then the lightning flashed again and I saw the blue hair, the fair skin, the eyes glowing all but magenta, freaking_magenta,_ and—

"Botan?"

"Dani-chan?" she repeated.

"What are _you_ doing here?" we said in unison, and then we stared at one another.

"You first," I said.

She looked around, water coursing over her neck and down her shirt. "Not out here!" she said, and we got busy with crawling under the tarp. A tent-pitching session later, after many 'Shh!'s and 'Stay low!'s, I found myself nose to nose with Botan in a small burrow, curled up on my side facing her. Our combined body heat made the air within our plastic pocket rather humid and steamy, but it sure did beat the cold rain.

Speaking of which, it's weird to feel the _force_ of the rainfall hitting you through something but not feel the _wetness_ of the rain against your skin. It's like the general concept of _rain_ is missing something, or something. Just throwing that out there.

"So," I said once we got settled.

I couldn't really see her; everything just looked very blue when the lightning lit up the air outside the tarp. Still, I could tell that her eyes were darting everywhere at once and that she was nervously biting her lip.

"So," she returned. She spoke in a hushed voice despite the fact that no one could have possibly heard us over the other background noise. "Um. This must look rather odd, I know, but I have my reasons, and I assure you that they are very good ones, Koenma would surely approve, and—"

"You feel like you should be there to help the boys instead of just sitting around?" I said.

Her jaw dropped. "How did you—?"

"Because I feel the same way."

"Oh." She processed that. "So we thought of the same escape route."

"Looks like it."

"Right. Not like there were many options, of course. Um."

"So when you said you had things to do, it meant you were stowing away," I said, remembering how she had excused herself back at the cottage. "You _planned_ this!"

"Um, yes." She sighed. "I would have just flown there—as a grim reaper I am allowed the power of flight to make my job easier, you understand—but this weather is simply atrocious and I did not feel comfortable flying in it at all. I also don't exactly know where the boys are staying at the moment, so going with Kuwabara seemed like the best bet, but he would _never_ have agreed to take me up front, so this was the only way, you see."

I laughed a little. "I just saw Kuwabara checking the engine while I was coming back from the bathroom and jumped in here on a whim."

"Well, it's very good that the two of us thought of the same thing," she said, tone pitched as if we were sharing delicious gossip; that's what it felt like, at least. "They will be much more understanding if we arrive together, like a team. They'd just kick me out if I showed up alone."

"And they'd probably chain me up so I could never see the light of day again if I came by _my_self," I said, agreeing with her. "Either that or Hiei would skin me alive on sight, which would be gross, not to mention painful."

"An excellent point!" she said, smiling. "But may I ask, when do you think the others will notice that you are missing?"

"Huh-wha—?" The thought had not occurred to me.

"Well, as far as _they_ know, I'm off on Spirit World business," Botan said. "You, however, don't have such a handy alibi. What was it that you said you were doing when you stowed away, using the bathroom?"

"Uh, yeah." I pondered the possibilities for a moment. "Well, they'll probably think I got lost and will look for me, but eventually the weather will drive them back indoors and I don't think they can contact anyone until the weather clears... is that right?"

Botan nodded.

"So they'll probably guess that I ran off," I said, "or they'll wait until the rain stops and then come to that conclusion after more searching, or maybe they'll think I wandered into the sea and died, but I'd put my money on the escaped idea. And when Koenma shows up they'll tell him whatever conclusion it is they actually came to, so either way I'm pretty much fucked." Something else came up in the depths of my deranged head. "Will Koenma be delayed by the storm, too?"

Botan nodded again. "Actually, yes. This storm is an odd one. I didn't want to say anything to anyone back at the cottage because they'd only worry, but it's storming in _all_ _three_ _worlds_ right now, and the cloud—because there is _only_ _one__cloud_, you see—the cloud seems to stretch through various rifts between the worlds all at once. It is quite concerning, but right now Koenma can't leave the palace in the Spirit World. For his own safety, of course."

"That buys me some time, then," I said. "Where are the guys, anyway?"

That seemed to get Botan excited. "Well, the party is one week from today, next Friday evening," she said. "Everyone slept over at Yusuke's apartment last night, but tonight they've rented a suite at the hotel hosting the party! They're staying there to get a feel for their surroundings, the lay of the land, and they're hoping to find Seishou and take him out before the party even starts, if they can."

"Sounds cool."

"Oh, Dani, you've never seen anything like this hotel before!" She sounded like a wistful schoolgirl. "I saw the reconnaissance photos. Crystal chandeliers and champagne everywhere, satin sheets, marble floors, gourmet food, gold taps on the sinks—solid gold! On the taps!" Her eyes lit up at that prospect, and then she frowned. "What _are_you laughing at?"

I banished my giggle. "You're excited about gold taps?"

"Aren't you?"

"Not so much as I am at the prospect of gourmet food and real beds, no."

Her sheepishness over such a silly subject seemed way out of place, all things considered. "The taps," she said, "will have to wait. We have quite the ride ahead of us, and then there are the boys to deal with when we get there, and..."

"And taps are the least of our worries."

She smiled at me, a beacon of warmth despite the coldness of the rain.

"Don't worry, Dani-chan," she said, and she took my hand right there in the dark. "It'll all work out in the end. You'll see."

Considering how I could hardly see anything beneath that tarp and the night was only just beginning, I had my doubts.

* * *

I must have fallen asleep despite the wind and the rain and the bumpy roads, because the next thing I knew I was being shaken awake quite violently. I blinked, groggy and disoriented—I had no idea where I was—to find myself sprawling atop something hard and crinkly. Botan crouched over me, water dripping from her lank hair onto my face, and with a groan I sat up. She moved away and whispered: "Quiet!" Her command was much louder than my groan, for the record, and it irked my newly-awoken mind the way a stick in the eye irks a bear fresh out of hibernation.

Somehow, I refrained from snapping at her. I decided to look around, instead, and when I did I realized that we were in what appeared to be an underground parking garage. Dim lights hung from bare concrete support struts, illuminating rows of cars and sloping driveways that could only lead to more floors of even more cars. It was an eerie place, to be sure, but Botan didn't seem too unnerved by it.

"Kuwabara just left," she said. She seemed excited, judging from the flash of her eyes. "There's an elevator nearby; I heard it running a few minutes ago. Let's try to find the lobby and have the boys paged in their room." She paused. "Well, I'll have them paged while you wait nearby. It might be better for me to explain why you're here, first. Lessen the shock and such."

"I like that idea," I told her, feeling less grumpy. She helped me out of the truck and onto the concrete floor, but when I stood upright for the first time in ages she frowned.

"If my hair looks anything like yours," she said, eying me, "then we probably aren't dressed properly for this hotel." Her normally perfect ringlets and ponytail were lank and squashed, respectively. "Here, let me..."

She took a minute to fix up my hair, combing it with her fingers. She poked her tongue out of the corner of her mouth when she concentrated, I noticed, and when she was done I took a minute to fix her hair, too. Both processes involved much giggling, and when we finished getting somewhat back to normal we began to look around for the elevator. It was easy to find, of course, as was the lobby (there was an elevator button labeled as such, thank the holy mother of Thomas Edison), and when the doors opened onto the aforementioned room I felt my jaw positively drop.

Have you ever visited the Rockefeller home in New York? I encourage you to Google it because the hotel reminded me very much of that illustrious place, at least as far as the general mood of indulgence went. The ceiling of the lobby stretched at least two stories tall, culminating in a window made of glass that showcased the nighttime sky above like a priceless painting. Crisscrossing those otherwise fragile panes were several beveled archways (buttresses? I'm not good with architecture) that suspended crystal chandeliers so big I had to hold my breath, expecting them to fall at any precarious moment. A huge round desk of black marble sat in the middle of the black-and-white-checkered-marble floor, and in the center of the circular desk was a giant candelabra with lights and flowers fountaining from its iron branches. Along the back wall of the lobby stood multiple glass doors, behind which glowed greenery clouded by mist, and along another wall stood so many revolving doors that I felt I was looking at a kaleidoscope. There was also a grand staircase leading to god knows where, but Botan—after a brief staring contest with the gorgeous place—beelined for the desk.

"Excuse me," she said to the man in the tuxedo behind the counter. He was standing over a leather guest-book and a fountain pen, looking dapper, helpful, and bored. "Excuse me, but we have friends staying here tonight, and they forgot to give us their room number! How silly! Would you mind calling them down here for me?"

"We are not allowed to divulge the personal information of our guests, miss," he said in a dry voice. His eyes blazed, for a moment, with a disgusted looked aimed at mine and Botan's mutually bedraggled appearances, but years of practice helped him school that expression into a mask of bland neutrality.

"Oh," said Botan. She stared at him, unsure of what to do, and then she let out a defeated sigh. "Um. Well, then." She glanced at me. "Come along, Dani."

I smiled at the man behind the desk (no use getting on his bad side) as Botan grabbed my wrist and pulled me to the glass doors with the greenery behind them. My cane slid across the marble floor, hard-pressed to find purchase.

"New plan," she hissed.

I waited for her to tell me what it was, and when she said nothing I opened my eyes widely and stared at her, expectant.

"A new plan," she said, for once falling short of my Botan-is-super-creative-in-a-pinch expectations. "Do you have one?"

She stood with her back to the glass doors; I stood facing them. For the first time I could see just how strange we looked thanks to my reflection in those windows. My hair hung in tattered straggles around my face, my makeup had smeared beneath my eyes, I had a red nose and chapped lips... pair that with rumpled clothing and a soaked _everything,_and I did not jive with the image of the hotel, that was for certain. I was about to bring this up to Botan when her face went considerably more pale than usual.

"Oh no," she whispered, and when I made to turn to see what she had spotted over my shoulder she reached out, grabbed my elbows, and stopped me.

"What..." I started to say, and then I focused in on the reflections in the doors, the reflections forming a background to the image of my face. I could see the whole of the lobby, desk and stairs and elevators and all, and walking across the lobby floor was...

"Shit," I breathed as I took stock of one long-haired redhead, a short man with spiky black hair, and two punks with similar hairstyles in distinctively different carroty and black shades. "Oh _shit_."

It was undeniably the boys. I could tell from their hair as much as I could from their individual walks and means of dress.

"What do we do?" I murmured. I sounded a lot more calm that my rapidly beating heart otherwise proclaimed. Yusuke's brash voice echoed through the cavernous lobby like cannon fire.

Botan thought about it for a minute, obviously as panicked as I was, and then her jaw set itself. She was good ol' Botan again, coming through in a pinch like a total pro. "Go!" she hissed, groping blindly behind her for the doors' handles. Her hand connected with a knob; she wrenched the door open and shoved me through it in the same motion. I stumbled on suddenly wet cobblestones. "Hide in there! I'll come get you later!"

"But Botan—"

"Just _go_!" she said, eyes focused on the boys.

The door closed, separating us with layers of steam and glass. I saw her trot across the lobby, waving. I turned to dive deeper into my new environment.

Needless to saw, I was alone.

* * *

I found myself in a garden, of sorts: A garden with stone pathways meandering through carefully tended plots of flowers, vines, bushes, trees, and all sorts of green and growing things I was sure Kurama would go nuts over. Flowers ached to embrace each other, issuing unreal amounts of confusing perfume. The place was open to the air and sky, so at least the scents didn't get too overwhelming, and luckily for me it had stopped raining and the lingering mist and dewy leaves were the only indicators of recent precipitation. Stars blazed in patches of cloudless sky overhead, not diminished at all by the city lights that I had been so sure would surround such a luxurious hotel.

_Or__maybe__this__place__is__in__the__country,_ I thought as I wandered farther into the garden. The greenery stretched much further than I thought it had any right to, but I didn't complain as I put more distance between myself and the others.

The garden started all nice and cultivated, lit frequently by warmly glowing spheres set high atop blackened metal rods (fairy lights, a younger me would have called them), but as I wandered deeper into the garden's heart the plants grew more wild, less brightly colored and crazily scented. Brownish greens instead of reds, pale greens in lieu of yellows... the pathways narrowed, too, and became harder to navigate as the lamps grew less and less frequent.

It was with relief (not to mention good fortune) that I happened to stumble upon a small oval courtyard amid a copse of twice-my-height shrubs that bloomed with cascades of small white flowers. They grew in clusters of a dozen or so, and—even luckier for me—there was a low bench off to one side and a lamp in the courtyard's center. I sat down with a sigh, resting my cane across my lap, and I tilted my face to the sky as I drank down a breath of cool night air. The flowers smelled a lot like baking bread, oddly enough, and I enjoyed the incongruous scent for a time before I heard what can only be described as... well, crashing noises punctuated by curses.

_Did__they__find__me__already?_ I thought, tensing in my seat, but it was far too late to run with my slow legs. With bated breath I watched as the shrubs across the courtyard from me rustled and snapped apart, and from the blackness between them stepped a man.

I sighed in relief when I realized who it was _not_, because I had absolutely no idea who this guy was and that was exactly what I needed right then. "You here to avoid the inevitable, too?" I asked, sounding grumpy even though the question was meant to be a friend-scoring one, and his eyes popped open in surprise.

"Actually, yes," he said. He eyed the bench beneath me as he brushed specks of broken twigs and leaves from his skin and clothes. "Are you in a sharing mood?"

"No." I scooted over to allow him room anyway. "Feel lucky you happened to meet someone so nice."

He smiled. "I am lucky," he said, and sat down.

This new fellow was a handsome one, I'll give you that much. Hair as blonde as wheat, eyes of a dove-gray shade that bordered on pale gooseberry, golden skin, broad shoulders, tall, muscular, I'm-a-country-boy-at-heart-,-honest-ma'am features... not quite a looker like Kurama, of course (because who _is_ a looker like Kurama, really?), but handsome all the same and exotic enough to fit in with my regular crowd quite nicely. He wore jeans and a black t-shirt that hugged his built frame, showing him off, but he seemed a little more self-conscious than someone of his attractiveness had any right to be.

"Well, I have to wait here until a friend of mine comes to get me, so as long as we're stuck here together," I said as he hunched and leaned his elbows on his knees, "we should get to know one another." My presumptuousness made me eager to clarify: "You _are_ stuck here, aren't you?"

"More like trapped," he said glumly.

"Oh. Well, that works too." I paused, unsure of what to say next, so I decided to introduce myself. "I'm Dani," I said, keeping up a conversational tone, "and I'm avoiding responsibility."

His nose crinkled; he had to turn his head sideways to look at me, and look at me with disbelief he did.

"I can understand the responsibility part," he said, "but _what_ did you say your name was?"

"Dani."

"Dah-nee? Donny?"

That was a battle I was in no mood to fight. "Dani, Donny, whatever. It's close enough."

He looked away, smiling as if he had told himself a private joke. "What an odd name," he said, staring down at the stones beneath us. "Dani. Heh."

"Yeah, I get that a lot," I said, rolling my eyes. "How about you?"

He pushed his fingers through his hair, sweeping it away from his face briskly, and then he sat up. "I'm Ryu," he said, "and I'm avoiding a woman."

_I__figured__a__guy__like__that__would__have__a__girl_, I thought. "Girl trouble?" I said. "Well, I'm a girl."

His pale eyes washed me over. "I can see that."

I decided not to comment on the unintentionally perverted statement due to his open face and the nonthreatening delivery of said statement. "Need advice from an objective source?" I continued, and he looked pensive. "I promise to be harsh, but I'll employ an underlying air of optimism you can't help but feel uplifted by. It's disgustingly refreshing."

That got a laugh out of him; the sound rang like an iron bell, echoing through me in waves.

"That was enough to cheer me up," he said once the laughter died away, eyes glittering with mirth. "Thanks, and no, I think I've got the situation covered."

"Then it's no skin off my nose," I said, looking back up at the sky. I twisted my cane between my fists. "Stars sure are bright tonight, huh?"

He looked up, too. "The rain cleared nicely."

"I'll say."

We sat there in silence until he said: "So what would an objective source tell me if I said that I was conflicted over how to handle something?"

I frowned, glancing at him, but he was still staring at the sky.

"Well," I said. "I guess I'd tell you that you should do what _wouldn't_ make you lose any sleep at night."

His odd eyes darkened. "And if both will make me lose a little?" he said, regarding the stars like they would tell him what to do.

I shrugged, not really knowing what to say beyond: "What would make for the least disturbing nightmares?"

That seemed to catch him off guard, because his mouth dropped open for just a second before snapping shut. He started to say something, face serious, but then his eyes fell to regard my lap and the cane twined between my fingers. Then the eyes traced the curve of my legs all the way down to my open sandals. I knew, vaguely, what was coming.

"Have you ever wished that other people were crippled?" he blurted out, and my eyes went wide. He held up his hands, turning red around the cheeks and ears, obviously as shocked at his words as I was. No one had ever asked me that before, especially not just after meeting me.

"I'm sorry, that was..." he said, but he had nothing more to say. "I'm... shit, I'm sorry."

"It's fine," I said, but it really wasn't because all of the sudden my head was filled with images, images I had never entertained before, and...

He did not let it go, however, and pressed me with: "No, really, I—"

"Drop it," I snapped. "Just drop it!"

He pulled back. I took a deep breath.

"I think," I carefully said, "that a part of me has always wanted others to share my pain and to know what I've been through. I'll admit that." Voicing these things to a stranger felt... good, almost, just as much as it felt stupid and dangerous. "And there's a part of me that just wants to be normal like everyone else, too. But I don't know if I've ever wished for others to be crippled, exactly. Does that make sense?"

"I... think so," he said. He started to say something else, but then his eyes focused on the shrub he had earlier burst through. "I have to go," he said, and stood.

"I hope everything works out for you, Ryu," I said as he began to jog away. At the sound of my voice he stopped and turned around.

"Thanks for the advice," he said softly, and two long-legged steps carried him to my side. Before I realized what was happening, he had reached past me and snapped a cone of clustering white blossoms off their stem and tucked the sprig behind my ear. Fingers curled into my hair and brushed my skin, warming me just as much as the smell of baking bread did.

"I'll see you around, Dani-san," said Ryu, and he vanished into the night.

* * *

Botan and the boys arrived hot on Ryu's heels and, surprisingly, none of them looked all that mad. Botan seemed nervous, of course, but the boys didn't pay her much attention, and the really odd thing was that they were all unanimously focused on Kuwabara.

"Now, before you say anything," Kuwabara said as they all marched into the courtyard and found me sitting on the bench, "I want you to know that you and Botan are the absolute worst sneaks on the planet."

I blinked at him as Jin waved at me behind the tall psychic's back.

"I'm still having trouble believing that you _let_ this happen," Yusuke grumbled, glaring. Kurama, at his side, chuckled in a velvety smooth sort of way, and Hiei just glared at everyone and everything he looked at. Jin didn't stop waving until I smiled at him.

"Hey, Dani and Botan had just as much a right to be here as the rest of us," Kuwabara snapped back. "If they want to come along then I'll let 'em."

"Aye, aye, that's what I've been sayin' this whole time!" Jin agreed.

"But she," Yusuke said, jabbing a finger at me, "is a spy!"

Kuwabara didn't want to hear it. "Yusuke, you can take your paranoia and shove it right up your—"

"I'm... confused," I said, looking between Kuwabara and Botan.

Botan sighed dramatically. "Kuwabara _let_ us tag along. He could sense out spirit energy in the truck the entire time and he didn't mind it one bit." She scowled at him. "And why, may I ask, didn't you let us ride in the cab?"

Kuwabara scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Hey, I didn't know how long it would take Genkai to catch up, which she never did, and I just wanted to play it safe, so..."

"So did you really have car trouble or were you just giving me enough time to stow away?" I asked.

"The second one!"

I threw up my hands before getting my cane and standing. "And here I was thinking I was just _so_ brilliant, but noooo, I was playing right into your hand the whole time." I shook my head wearily. "I sat down here worrying that I was going to get flayed alive like a roast duck, and you guys are hardly even _surprised_."

Kurama coughed into his fist to draw our attention. "Need I remind everyone," he said, "that we have yet another guest waiting for us upstairs?"

"Right!" said Botan, and she took my arm. "Dani, I believe you have a talk with Koenma to attend."

My mouth went dry. "He's here?" I squeaked. "He's here already?"

"Of course! He came over as soon as the storm cleared. Now hurry, we can't keep him waiting, and I need to fix your hair, and..." She stopped, eyes narrowed. "Picking flowers is bad, Dani-chan."

I didn't know what she was talking about until her hand moved toward the flower in my hair.

"Oh, this? I didn't pick this." I pulled away so she couldn't take it from me.

"Really? Who did?"

"There was a young man sitting with me until a few minutes ago. We talked for a bit. He was nice." But, despite my chipper words, everyone had gone very still around me, eyes staring and panicked, and I felt I had to ask: "What? Is something wrong?"

"Hiei, check her," Kurama said, voice dangerously muffled, and I felt a familiar itch caress my cerebellum.

_Long__time__no__see,_I thought.

Hiei spared no time for niceties as our physical eyes met right along with our mental consciousnesses. _This__is__an__image__of__the__medium__called__Seishou,_ he said, and my head was filled with a vision of darkness. Long black hair that fell to an incredibly tall man's feet, golden eyes with liquid hematite pupils shone out of skin as pale as milk, all of which was enveloped by an aura of shadow and power so complete it made the light from the lamp overhead sting my eyes like acid. He was beautiful, terrible and wonderful all at the same time, and I couldn't look at him for fear of going up in flames.

"That's not him!" I cried out, covering my face with my hands, and I threw a picture of the boy I had spoken with in Hiei's corporeal face: golden skin, blonde hair, an innocent smile and a pair of burdened eyes that shone purple in the darkness. The apologetic and slightly nervous Ryu was nothing like Seishou; that much was clear in an instant.

"It wasn't Seishou," he said as he pulled the image out of my head. "She's clear."

A collective sigh of relief went up, and my own sigh went with it.

"Well," said Botan, slipping an arm around my shoulders, "now that that's over with, let's go!"

* * *

I hummed a funeral march all the way up to the room, and when the set of wide double-doors opened, my humming died off, because it then became DESCRIPTION TIME!

Dear god, was this is getting old. I wasn't used to having so many new things thrown at me in just one day. I'll be brief.

Four massive velvet couches: brown and arranged in a square. Coffee table in center of aforementioned square: dark wood. Lamps everywhere: gold and expensive. Chandeliers: crystal. Rugs: Turkish, or something. A crap-ton of rooms: all through wide veranda doors off of the main room. A huge and totally open wet bar, a huge balcony, pillows, fresh fruits in vases and bowls, remnants of a beautiful meal on the table. Typical high-class stuff in shades of brown and white and gold, all gorgeous and more expensive than anything I had ever owned.

Sitting on one of the couches was, of course, Koenma. He didn't look too happy to see me.

"Want to explain why I had to take an extra trip to find you this evening, Dani-san?" he asked testily.

"Nope," I said, heart fighting to jump out of my mouth.

"Well, then, let me explain that I did not appreciate the extra trip," he said, and he gestured at the couches. "This could have been kept private had you stayed with Genkai, but instead I will have to showcase my findings to everyone who cares to hear them. I hope you're happy with that."

"Sure thing," I said, sitting down on the couch across from the prince. _Not__like__you're__gonna__find__anything,__anyway,_I thought as I settled in. Botan and Jin took seats on either side of me; Hiei and Kurama sat on the third couch while Kuwabara and Yusuke took the fourth. _You're__either__gonna__condemn__me__as__a__spy__or__label__me__as__a__civilian.__Either__way,__me__and__my__mission__are__both__screwed._

Koenma leaned back in his seat, legs crossed, and from the depths of his billowing sleeve he drew a scroll the length of my forearm.

"You claim no knowledge of the three worlds," he said, tapping the scroll in his fist like a weapon, "so allow me to clarify. There are three of them."

Botan rolled her eyes.

"They exist one on top of the other, like floors in a building. Demon World is below Human World, Spirit World is above Human World. That's why many humans think of hell as 'below' them; some humans in ancient time accidentally traveled to Demon World and spread the word that they 'fell' to get there. Opposite for Spirit World, which some interpreted as heaven." He smirked. "The physics of everything are such that the worlds aren't _really_above and below one another, but for purposes of simplification let's just say they are."

"I'm game," I said.

He pulled another scroll from his sleeve and set both scrolls on the coffee table, pushing plates and glasses to the side as he did—and when I say that he 'pushed' them to the 'side', I really mean that 'shoved' them to the 'floor.' Many pieces broke, making me wince and the others stare with wide eyes at the mess (and the expense of replacing such fine china). Koenma paid them no heed as he unrolled one scroll and laid the parchment out. The scroll was about the size of the entire table, although its edges did hang off a bit.

"This," said Kurama, leaning forward. Green eyes gleamed. "This..."

"Yes," said Koenma. He looked at me. "Very few attempts to map the Demon World have ever been made. It's much too dangerous for cartographers to travel freely in, and the geography can change completely after high-powered battles, and there are too many of those to track. This is, as far as I know, the only truly cohesive map of the Demon World in existence." He traced a finger over the map's face. Swirling black lines webbing across faded gold parchment made me think of spilled spaghetti. "Worth a fortune, of course. A prized treasure of the Spirit World."

_But__there__are__a__bunch__of__levels__to__Demon__World,_I thought. _Y'know,__deep__ones__were__the__S-class__live.__That's__what__they__said__during__the__Sensui__arc,__at__least._

But then I remembered all the differences I had discovered already and I decided to keep an open mind.

"There is also the altitude issue," Koenma went on, and I kicked myself for getting too far ahead. "There are floating countries, drifting islands in the sky, plateaus the size of continents that are held up by nothing more than a pencil-thick column of stone... a mapmaker's nightmare, as you may have guessed."

_Hence__the__levels__in__the__Sensui__arc,_ I thought as I nodded in affirmation.

His fingers traced the map again. "Most areas on the map indicate odd levels and multiple stories of landscape," he said, "but there is one area that is oddly flat. It lies in the Westernmost region of the Demon World. There are no levels in that region, and most of it is covered by sea. However, there is a landmass mostly covered in whirlpools and ruins, one which few can access and most avoid."

"My home isn't like that at all," I said.

"As you said," Koenma said. He pulled an old leather-bound book from his sleeve—really, how much could he store in there? "This book sheds some light on your story." He set it carefully atop the unrolled map and reached for the other scroll.

"The book is an ancient Human World historical text," he said, unwinding a scarlet string from around the scroll. "It's roughly ten thousand years old, and it speaks of a place in the Human World west that no longer exists today, a place with technology so advanced it could bring people back from the dead. Today's Human World has similar technology, of course, but the west the author speaks of had technology thousands of years ahead of when the book was written."

He laid the second scroll atop the first. I could tell it was an ancient document from the way he handled it with utmost care, and from the dust marring the parchment's edges.

"This map accompanied the book. See something familiar?" he asked.

Heart going nuts inside my chest, I hopped off my chair and knelt beside the low table. The second scroll was much smaller than the first, but despite the small size I could easily see what Koenma was trying to show me.

The Americas, north and south and central. Right where they were supposed to be.

"He called the place 'America,'" Koenma said softly. I couldn't look away from the sketched continents, all that was left of my homeland. "And in his book he describes how the people of America dabbled in technology so evil it ripped the very fabric of space in two. They used this technology to go to war with themselves, and in their struggle for conquest and internal hatred the Americas were swallowed by the sea as they tumbled down into hell, never to be seen again."

"The Spirit World confiscated all records of America to keep that technology a secret, although no plans of it remain so we needn't have worried. But King Enma considered the destruction of the Americas a huge black mark on Spirit World's face, and he forbade mention of it ever again. We blotted out all records of its name to keep the Spirit World's failure a secret, and we destroyed or confiscated all documents that mentioned the place to keep the memory of America dead and gone. For us, that chapter of history was over and done with." He chuckled. "I had to fight tooth and nail to get into the restricted vault where these texts were kept."

I said nothing.

He coughed in discomfort; my stare was an intense one. "However, the story of America does not end there."

"It doesn't?"

"No." He pushed the book and the map of the American world aside, and then he pointed at the Demon World map. "See here?"

I looked. Outlined in black were dozens of islands, small and large and huge alike, and they clustered together in a way that reminded me—in a very vague and disjointed fashion—of an outline of the Americas, perhaps one sketched by a small child with an unsteady hand.

"America fell into hell, the author said," Koenma intoned in a voice of quiet thunder. "And according to what little Demon World history exists, there was an odd occurrence in the western parts of the Demon World ten thousand years ago. A rain of earth and buildings crushed half a world to smithereens, blotting out thousands with radiation and rubble. That rain—that ruination—was America falling deep into the Demon World as a result of its own pride and greed."

I raised my eyes to look at Koenma. He was staring straight at me, a judge presiding over a room of stunned silence and disbelievers.

"Your home has been gone for ten thousand years, Dani-san," he said softly, "and my father made sure that no one could have _ever_ discovered America's existence. You're too young to have lived there when it still bore its proper name, so how could _you__—_as young and as powerless as you are—have known it?"

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Erm... cliffy? Also, AmeriCAS, not just the USA. Koenma doesn't know there's a difference between the north and south, ha ha, and Dani's not correcting him._

_OK, so, Botan. I think I have her speech patterns down pretty well after writing this chapter, and it all boils down to the one thing English teachers everywhere despise: run-on sentences and italics. She just... babbles. Also, when I write her I speak her lines aloud with a British accent. This goes on top of the accent I already have (Texan) and the results are silly._

_Originally, the plan was for Koenma to have his talk with Dani and then, later that night, have Dani discover Botan about to fly off on her oar to find the boys. She persuades Botan to take her along. For some reason I couldn't get the image of Dani jumping into a truck bed and freaking out when she's not alone out of my head, so I had to do it this way. More drama, yay! Also, I've been doing some reordering of the plot and the results are getting more and more streamlined as I work through it in my head repeatedly, which is good news for you. =]_

_Many thanks to my lovely reviewers! Kai-chan94, lostmoonchild, ichixichigo, colbub, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, WickedLovelyDream, Naitza-Kururugi, Zetsubel, Kaiya's Watergarden, WorldsAngel, chocolateluvr13, AkaMizu-chan, j.d.y., Foxgirl Ray, 0nfateswings, crossyourteez, DoilyRox, Reclun, rain chant, Panda-chan31, fluffyfoxears, Kiriatana, heve-chan, ShadowFireFox13!_


	26. Chapter 26: Flowers

Future Talk

Chapter 26:

"Flowers"

* * *

Botan caught a cold from all the rainy trip to the hotel: just a small one, mainly sniffles and a bit of a cough, but nevertheless she couldn't help but snore softly as she lay next to me in one of the suite's many king-sized beds. I listened to her rattling breath for a long time as I lay there, staring at the dark ceiling through tired eyes, but try as I might I could not fall asleep.

I blamed Koenma, the future one. He had lied to me, after all, even if it was through simple omission. Over the course of an entire month I had been led to believe that America didn't exist in this world, but low and behold it actually did, and here I was without an explanation or an alibi or anything. I was lucky that Jin and Botan had been in the room after Koenma's reveal session, because otherwise I would have surely been screwed.

_How do you know about America? _Koenma had asked me, but in the aftershock of disbelief I had merely stared at him, dumbstruck, and when he had repeated the question I felt my eyes fill with confused—not to mention betrayed—tears. I cried into my hands, not knowing what to do and caving under the pressure of everything that had come crashing down onto my head (and yes, I see the irony in that statement) and Botan had immediately started to comfort me, as had Jin. They then managed to convince Koenma that my tears were products of suffering more than enough shock for one day, thank you very much, and that I obviously needed to go to sleep and process the fact that my home was little more than an impassable pile of rubble.

_Such a shock would reduce anyone to tears,_ Botan repeated more than once. _Could you imagine if someone told you that _your_ home had been obliterated without you knowing it?_

Botan then took over one of the bedrooms, pried Jin's arm off of me before shooing him out, and spent the next hour or so letting me cry on her shoulder (good old Botan, right?). She tried to throw away the wilted flowers tucked behind my ear, but I made her put the flowers Ryu gave me in a glass of water on the windowsill, and I would not calm down until those blossoms were safe. Once the crying wore off into half-hearted sniffles, she ordered a nice meal through room service and bummed a change of clothes off of the boys: we ate wonderful beef burgundy crepes dressed in donated boxers and undershirts, but the sleepover-esque air of the night was marred by my somber mood and unwillingness to help Botan fill the silence. Still, she seemed to enjoy herself up until the point my red-rimmed eyes reminded her that it was time to go to bed, and she shut off the light with a contented sigh and one last question.

"So... you're really from America?" she asked as the lights dimmed. Silk sheets whispered across my skin like a warm breath.

"Yes," I told her.

"And... how did you get here?"

I rolled onto my side, curling into a ball of misery and hurt. "Your guess is as good as mine." _And the future Koenma's. I can't believe he didn't tell me about this._

The huge mattress barely even vibrated when she shifted her position. "Well, I believe you're from America no matter how bad and impossible and fishy this looks."

"Ouch."

"Oh, you know what I mean!" Her voice dropped into a comforting register. "There's no way you could have known about it, your name is certainly odd, and that language of yours is unlike anything I have ever heard, so you really _must _be America-nese. There is no other explanation!"

That got a giggle out of me. "American. A person from America is an 'American.'"

"Oh. Right." She paused. "Hiei also told us about your childhood, the one he saw in your memories back when you first came here. Everyone spoke your language, but it didn't look like the ruins of a collapsed country at all. That part doesn't make much sense."

I shrugged despite the fact that she couldn't see the motion in the dark, and with both wry humor and a sense of despair I suggested: "Time travel?" Was it wrong of me to hope that someone would just figure everything out and end this confusing misery?

This time it was Botan who laughed. "For all the world-hopping I do, you'd think I'd believe just about anything, but time travel? That most certainly does not exist. Can you imagine how much of a mess this world would be if it did?"

"A mess," I said hollowly. "Right. A real mess."

She rolled over again, and I could tell from the sound of her voice that she had turned away.

"Well," she mumbled through a yawn, "tomorrow we'll be investigating the hotel from top to bottom, so we'll need our rest. Sweet dreams, Dani-chan!"

"You too, Botan-chan. Night."

It only took a moment for her snores to drift into the air, but it took me much longer to join her in the depths of sleep.

* * *

"You don't deserve to look morose," I told him.

"I know."

"I should be angry."

"Yes, you should."

"I'm only hurt, though," I said, cocking my head to the side. A smattering of pebbles drifted toward me through the not-quite-air, so I batted them away with my hand. "Why do you think that is?"

Koenma sat next to me on a boulder in the middle of the space-that-wasn't, watching through distant brown eyes the way an oil tanker and a skyscraper danced together in the air above our heads. I knew that this was a dream simply because I'd had one just like it before, battered-up future Koenma and all, and I knew that this Koenma was real simply because the Book was nowhere nearby. Therefore, the Beasts could not invade my dreams.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about America," he said. I would have simply told him it was fine after that had he not allowed a fleck of, what was that, _embarrassment_?, to leak into his expression. That peaked my interest and, in the same stroke, my questions.

"What's that look for?" My eyes narrowed. "OK, now I know something's up. What aren't you telling me?"

"Well..."

"Well, what? Is there something else? Am I the reincarnation of the world's fattest man or Hitler or something? What?"

"Oh, no, nothing like that," he hastened to reassure me. "It's just an... an, um, _oversight_ on my part."

I stared at him, putting the embarrassment together with what he had just said, and when I came to a conclusion I felt my jaw drop.

"Are you saying that you _forgot_ America existed?" I hissed.

He looked away with the face a dog would wear if you caught it with your favorite pair of shoes in its mouth.

"What the hell, Koenma. What. The. HELL? What else are you forgetting?" I put my head in my hands. "Holy crap, you send me on a mission that could very easily kill me and you forget to tell me the important bits? What kind of world ruler are you?"

"I'm under stress."

"Don't talk to me about stress," I snapped.

He looked sheepish. "Right. My mistake."

"Yeah, you're right, it _was_ your mistake." I stood up on my perfect dream/spirit feet and glared down at him. He sat with one knee bent, one leg stretched out, and an elbow hooked around the upright knee, and he looked absolutely miserable. "And don't make any more of them, either, or I swear I'm abandoning this mission and you can damn all our worlds to hell for your little 'mistakes.'"

His eyes widened in shock. "Dani—"

"Yeah, so what if I sound selfish?" I snapped. "I may be just a kid, Koenma, but I'm _the_ kid you trusted to save the world. You better do right by me and fill me in if anything else like this decides to pop up." I turned away, staring into the wreckage-filled vacuum that had once been a world full of light and life. "Now make me wake up. I don't want to look at you anymore."

"Dani..."

Hearing him say my name in such a sweet, pleading tone almost made me forgive him.

Almost.

"Let me go," I said. "Please, Koenma, just let me go."

And so he did.

* * *

Botan was still snoring when I woke up, stretched, and crawled out of bed. A peek past the damask window curtains told me that it was still night outside, but I didn't feel sleepy at all and when I went out into the living-room-type-thing I found that someone else appeared to have trouble sleeping, too.

"Go back to bed," Hiei said, voice carrying despite its low pitch. I could see him in the light of a single lamp that burned on a table next to him. He sat on one of the couches, hands jammed into the pockets of his pants as his feet (still clad in black boots) lay atop the coffee table. He was not wearing his cloak; the cut-off shirt he wore in its stead made his pale arms stand out like ghosts in the dark. With a start I realized that his face was markedly more tan than his arms, which would, I assume, be covered by the cloak most of the time.

The thought of Hiei with tan-lines was almost laughable, but luckily I held my humor in.

"I'm not sleepy," I said, sitting on one of the other couches. My stomach growled. "A little hungry, though."

His head jerked toward the wetbar. "There's a refrigerator in there."

I went to investigate and was rewarded with many cases of leftovers. But after I pulled a white carton filled with chilly chow-mein into my arms, I realized what I was surrounded by and I peeked into the fridge again on a different mission.

"Want a beer?" I asked Hiei, straightening to look at him over the top of the granite counter, and he raised an eyebrow.

"You don't drink."

"I do tonight."

He looked away, and when he did his eyes glinted in the dark. "I'll drink one," he said.

I found a bottle opener and cracked open two servings of some Japanese beer I had never heard of. A cautious swig revealed that it tasted like no other beer I had ever had, and I had had many as a party-going college student (although most of them had been cheap ones no one _besides_ a party-going college student would touch with a ten foot pole). This beer was light, bubbly, and tasted like dusty sunlight.

I balanced the beers atop my food and did my best waitress impression to carry them over to Hiei. He did not appear impressed that I had been able to carry everything without spilling, but I didn't mind too much as I sat down and started eating. The noodles were delicious in spite of their low temperature, and soon I started nursing my beer.

"Why are you drinking tonight?"

I looked up at him over the mouth of my bottle, but I didn't know what to say.

His fingers curled around his own drink as he rested it atop his knee. Red eyes bored straight into mine.

"Why are you drinking?" he repeated.

I took a drink. Beer affects me much less intensely and much more slowly than straight liquor, but I still can't drink more than two without getting sloshed.

"Answer me, Dani."

My stomach churned a bit. "Wouldn't you drink after hearing something like that?" I said.

"Something like what?"

"Like... like that you can never go home again?"

Hiei went still, even more so than usual, and I held my breath.

"I know that feeling very well," he said, voice low, dangerous, and husky.

_Aw shit,_ I thought, and I couldn't help but ask: "Do you?"

He stared down at his bottle, lips curling as if he had seen a bug on his wrist. "Unlike you, I have what most would call a 'home,' if by home you mean a birthplace. But I can't go back there, and it's not because it fell into another world." His lips curled even more. I could see his curved eyeteeth against the tan of his lips. "They don't want me there."

"I'm... sorry."

"Don't be. I don't want them, either."

"Well then, that's... good?"

Eyes flashed at me, angry as much as they were sad. "Alcohol makes your words slow and thoughts stupid."

I stared at him, mouth open, before realizing (well, hoping) that he meant that that's what alcohol did to _everyone, _not just me in that moment. Then I took a drink and muttered: "Ouch."

He looked away, down at his hands. "Addiction—addiction to drink, to killing, to blood—none of it is the answer. Something like that can numb pain, but it can never get rid of it. You're better off killing _yourself_ if you want to avoid anguish so badly."

I nearly choked on my swig of beer. "K-kill myself? Whoever said anything about that?" By that time about all of that first beer was gone. The edges of my vision were fuzzy. "Look, I just went through the second biggest ordeal of my life, the first biggest being the time I was _stabbed to death_, and if alcohol will help me get through the worst of the shock then hey, why the hell _shouldn't_ I drink?"

Cherry eyes narrowed into bloody slits. "So drinking won't become a habit?"

The thought made me chuckle. "No way. I'd only embarrass myself." My next phrase was more serious. "Please, Hiei, let me have tonight to just... drown it all out, and not just in beer."

He didn't say anything for a long time, but then he set his drink down on the coffee table and pushed it toward me. The wet streak trailing after made the glass appear buckled and flawed.

"You need this more than I do," he said, and I smiled.

* * *

One hour and four beers later, I found myself face down on the floor and giggling. My fifth drink felt cold against my palm; I threw back the last dregs of it with another fit of laughter.

"This is _so_ _good_," I said, remarking on the brew's taste.

Hiei, still sitting on the couch, made a small noise of grumpy amusement. "You said that already."

"Did I?"

"Five times."

"Oooooh." I rolled onto my back. The coffee table was between Hiei and I, but I did my best to sit up and lean on it so I could see the fire apparition with my spinning eyes. "I'm pretty drunk, maybe."

Red eyes glittered with suppressed humor. "I can see that."

"Soooo please don't tell anyone."

He smirked. "I won't."

"Especially Hiei."

That made him pause, staring at me, and I giggled at his perplexed expression.

"Don't tell you that I'm drunk!" I told him, pointing at his face with my index finger, and then I clapped my hand over my mouth. "Oh no!"

"Why don't you want me to know?" he asked.

My self-consciousness melted away into drunken self-assurance. "Because I told you that you were cute the last time I was drunk!" I said, dropping my voice into an exaggerated whisper. "Isn't that embarrassing?"

"It embarrasses you to admit you think I'm cute?" he said, and even the drunk me caught the hint that I had insulted him.

"No!" I said, shaking my head so hard I thought my ears would burst. I banged my beer bottle on the table a few times to punctuate my point. "Girls don't like when guys like that they like like cute!"

Hiei's eyes bore no expression, but their sheer wideness made him seem interested in whatever it was I was saying and I took that as encouragement. "That made no sense, Dani."

Indignantly, I protested: "It did! It did! I make sense so!" I paused, trying to summon up the will to speak properly, and then I used all of my power to enunciate the phrase: "Girls don't like guys to know they think they're cute!"

Hiei didn't understand this. "Why not?"

My mouth worked, and through my inebriated fog I managed: "Because, because what if the guy thinks the girls _isn't_ cute?" I flopped back onto the floor, making Hiei disappear from view. "So embarrassing!" I moaned, hands covering my face, and then I groped on the tabletop for my bottle of beer. I found it, held it to my lips, and discovered it to be empty. "More beer!" I said, raising the bottle above my head (I'm sure that all Hiei could see was the bottle and my hand sticking up from the edge of the coffee table, which probably looked like something out of a comic strip).

"I think you've had enough," I heard him say.

"Nope!" I rolled onto my hands and knees, grabbed my cane off of the couch, and staggered to my feet. "To the bar!" I said, pointing with my free hand, and I couldn't take more than three steps before falling over.

Hiei caught me, of course: I found myself draped over one of his outstretched arms like a folded towel, face pointed downward and legs kicking parallel to the floor.

"You're done," he said. "Back to bed."

I sighed and went limp over his arm. "If you say so, boss man," I mumbled, because the way his arm pressed into my diaphragm made it hard to speak.

"Can you walk?"

I twisted until my feet hit the floor, and then I made a halfhearted shuffle that couldn't support me very well. "No," I said. My cane slipped from my fingers and landed with a 'whumph' on the gold carpet, carpet made bronze in the dimness of the room. "Whoopsie!"

Hiei scoffed, and the next thing I knew he had pulled me into his arms. I uttered a small scream of protest before he clapped a hand over my mouth and hissed: "Quiet or you'll wake the others!"

When he removed the hand, I confided through a barrage of giggles: "Thanks, Hiei, because Kurama is scary when he doesn't get his beauty rest!"

Hiei moved toward my bedroom, but his lips quirked in response to my joke.

"And," I added, "I think I'd call him a girl if I saw him, and he would kill meeee!"

"You're right, he would."

"Yup. You're so right all the time, aaaaall the time, and you know what, that's _so funny_!"

I didn't see him twist the doorknob to get inside mine and Botan's room, but nevertheless we made it into the realm of the grim reaper's quiet snores. Hiei carried me to the empty side of the huge bed and laid me down, and with a hint of tenderness I didn't know he possessed he tugged the comforter over me with one swift flick of his wrist. I cuddled into the fluffy warmth with a contented noise made deep in my throat, and then I felt hot fingers touch my forehead.

My eyes fluttered open. Hiei stood over me, studying my face. His eyes shone like a feral animal's, twin rings of red glowing in the dark, but for once I was not concerned with this. Actually, I thought the effect—normally such an unsettling one—was almost, in a weird way, beautiful.

"You've got the most _weird_est eyes," I told him, already feeling sleepy now that I was comfortable and warm.

Hiei had his back to the room's wide window, and a faint pink light shone shone through it like a weak fog-light. It highlighted Hiei's silhouette and made the air above him glow like embers aching to leap to life in my hands, and I realized that the rain had picked up along with the coming dawn. The shadows of racing drops quivered over everything, making it look like we were floating underwater. With a sigh I reached up to touch those eyes of his, swimming as they were in darkness and dreams, and then the hand on my brow vanished. He caught my wrist and tugged it back down toward the bed.

"Dani," he said, and his eyes gleamed. "Sleep now."

"But..."

"Dani." All the command Hiei could ever muster had been infused into the sound of my name, and I obediently closed my eyes.

"Good night, red-eye-person," I murmured, and now that my eyes were closed I realized just how sleepy I really was.

Hiei didn't say anything, although I wished he would. As I floated off to sleep, aware of the hand caressing my hair and the hiss of warm rain on the window pane, I remembered my mother singing me to sleep, smoothing my hair from my eyes as I slept.

_Rain, rain, go away, _she would always sing on stormy nights._ All the world is waiting for the sun._

_Mom, _I thought, and even poised on the brink of an abyss I could feel the tear slip from the corner of my eye. I'm sure it blended with the reflection of rain racing across my skin. "Mom," I murmured aloud, and then the nostalgic fingers soothed my cheek, smearing the tear away. The kind act put me at ease, and I drifted back to blackness.

The last words I heard before falling away completely were so low I almost thought I imagined them.

_I don't _not_ think you're cute,_ said the voice, and the fingers brushed my lips.

* * *

"Really, Dani? _Really_?"

"Shut up."

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Oh, wait, never mind, you're just hung over! No wonder, considering how much _beer_ you drank!"

"Botan, you're making my headache worse," I groaned, forehead pressed to the tabletop. As it turns out, the suite had a kitchen I had not previously noticed, and in it was a table big enough for everyone to sit around. This morning, however, it was only me and Botan. I had awoken early despite my lack of sleep and Botan couldn't sleep through my pained groaning. "I wish Yukina was here. She's great with hangovers."

"Ugh, here," Botan said, and I felt her hand rub my back in slow circles. "Sit up and let me heal you."

"You can heal?" I asked, and then I remembered the Artifacts of Darkness arc of the anime and manga. Still, my initial surprise was genuine, and it pleased Botan.

"I may be a harbinger of death," said the girl with magenta eyes and power blue hair, "but I learned to heal when I was assigned to Yusuke. I felt it would be useful when it came to serving the spirit detective."

I sat up and looked at her through eyes squinting to block out as much light as humanly possible. "The what?" I asked, feeling sharp blades of pain slice into my eyes and head.

"The spirit detective. Oh, goodness, you don't know anything about that do you?" She rolled back the sleeves of her button-down blue shirt and held up her hands like a newly-washed surgeon. "Lean in close."

I did so. She put her hands on either side of my face and concentrated, and soon enough I was looking at her through a veil of buttercup yellow light. As she massaged her fingers into my head she began to talk of Yusuke's death, resurrection, appointment to the vacant position of spirit detective, and his subsequent ordeals. I was fascinated to hear the story from Botan, but it held almost perfectly to the anime's version of events so I didn't learn too much new information.

"Feeling better?" she asked a few minutes later, and when I opened my eyes all the way and only felt the smallest of headaches coming on, I nodded. "Well, great! Now no one has to know how drunk you got last night!"

"Dani got drunk last night?"

Botan paled when I glared at her and said: "Yes, Kuwabara-san, I did."

"Did what?" said Yusuke as he joined Kuwabara in the doorway.

"Dani got drunk," Kuwabara explained.

Yusuke glared. "Damn, and I missed it? How badly did you embarrass yourself?"

I put my head in my hands. "This is the worst of it right now. Thanks, guys. Now let's drop this conversation and move on."

"Move on from what?" said Kurama as he walked up behind Yusuke.  
"DAMMIT!" I yelled at the ceiling. "OK, so now that _everyone_ knows, I'll just admit that all the beer bottles in the garbage are mine. There, I said it. Can we move on, _please_?"

"Moving on, moving on, sheesh," Yusuke said as he pulled up a chair. "Hey, Botan, make breakfast."

"Just order room service, dummy," Kuwabara said as he sat on my other side. "How's your hangover?"

"Gone, thanks to Botan."

"All right, cool! Good job, Botan!"

She giggled. "Don't mention it, just doing my job, I'm here all week!"

"AKA: praise her until her head explodes," Yusuke muttered. A leather-bound room service menu had been propped against a huge vase of flowers; he was studying it with a critical eye, and I noticed that a gold symbol—a stylistic flower that reminded me of a foxglove—had been embossed onto the menu's cover. "How do pancakes sound?"

The thought of a non-Japanese breakfast made me weak in the knees. "Waffles?" I asked, hopeful, but Yusuke shook his head.

"They're not on here." He paused. "What are 'wah-foo-loos, anyway?"

I sighed in defeat and disgust. "The American breakfast food of the gods. I'll make some sometime." Then I remembered that waffles were actually a Belgian creation, but since they didn't seem to exist I just let my own country take the credit.

"Oh, do you like to cook, Dani-san?" Kurama asked, interested, but I shook me head.

"Just breakfast food. Waffles, pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, biscuits and gravy, that sort of thing. Anything more complicated than batter and a griddle is beyond me."

"That sounds like the weirdest breakfast ever," Kuwabara said, frowning.

"Hey, don't knock it 'til you try it!"

Jin walked into the room at that point, yawning with his fangs on full display, and he plopped into a chair with a rush of riotous red hair. "Ya got breakfast already?" he said, sniffing the air with a grin. "Smells great!"

"Are you hallucinating?" Kuwabara said, raising a skeptical eyebrow. "We haven't even looked at the menu yet!"

Jin blinked at him, obviously confused, and then he sniffed again, screwing up his nose until his humongous eyes all but crossed.

"Nah, I'm not hallucinatin' at all!" he said with a frown that looked more like a pout. "Nobody c'n fool _my_ nose. Better n' a bloodhound, that's me!" He lifted a hand, index finger extended toward the ceiling, and swirled the hand in a counterclockwise motion. A breeze kicked up, ruffling my hair and stirring the air in the room around. That's when the smell hit me.

"Oh wow, smells good," said Yusuke, grinning. "Who's cooking?"

Kurama inhaled, chest expanding beneath his shirt. "_We're_ not cooking," he said, "and I don't think we could smell other suites from here."

"Smell's too close to be from anywhere but here, that it does," Jin agreed.

"Um," I said, "it's the flowers."

I noted raised eyebrows all around, so I gestured at the vase of flowers in the center of the table. _Why didn't I notice them before? _I thought.

"Last night, in the garden, I sat in the middle of a patch of these," I said, reaching out to touch the cones of purple blooms clustered on slender stems. When I pulled my hand away, the scent of baking breads and a hint of cinnamon followed it so thickly I could almost see it. "Remember? The ones in my hair?"

"The ones your friend gave you?" Botan said.

"Yup."

"N' who was he, exactly?" Jin asked, suddenly cross, and I rolled my eyes.

"Just some random guy who wanted advice from a girl who wouldn't sugarcoat things for him," I said.

"Named Ryu, right?" Kuwabara said, leaning forward in his chair so he could squint at the flowers.

"Uh, yeah," I said. "But, if you don't mind my asking, how the _hell_ did you know that?"

He plucked a small white square out of the crystal vase and looked at it. It was tiny on his huge palm, and his lips pursed. "Because it says so on the card that came with the flowers."

"What?" Botan shrieked, throwing her arms around my shoulders in a hug.

I shook her off of me. "Let me see that!" I said, standing so I could lean toward him across the table.

He offered the card. I snatched it up.

_To my new and already dear friend, Dani,_ it read._ Allow me to treat you to dinner in exchange for your remarkable kindness. Tonight in the hotel restaurant; 7 o'clock? I'll be waiting. _

_Yours,_ it was signed,_ Ryu._

"Dani, you have an admirer!" Botan squealed as she peered over my shoulder at the elegantly penned words.

"No I don't!" I said, but I couldn't help the blush rising high in my cheeks as I read the note again. I turned it over between my fingers; the same flower symbol that had been on the menu was on the back of the card. It startled me, but I couldn't quite figure out why.

"A what?" Jin said, unhappy and more than a little irked.

"He wants to take her to dinner!" Botan explained before I could tell her to keep quiet. I put my hand over my face in defeat. "Oh, Dani, tell me, is he handsome?"

"Uh," I said, and that's when I caught Kurama's cold gaze on the pretty purple flowers. "Hey, you."

He jumped a little and looked at me.

I leveled a finger at him. "Don't even think about it," I said.

His thin lips and set jaw didn't look pleased. "Think about what?" he said, and he turned to Yusuke. "Yusuke, breakfast?"

The spirit detective nodded, waiting for the rest of whatever it was Kurama was going to say.

The fox demon's eyes were more like glaciers than green and growing plants. "Order it," he said.

"Oh, uh, sure," Yusuke replied, and he got up to get the phone in the living room.

"I'm gonna grab a shower," Kuwabara said, standing.

"Me too!" Botan chirped. "Dani, you can bathe after me, and then you can tell me aaaaall about Ryu!"

I sat back down and watched her skip out. "Uh, sure," I said, and in uncomfortable silence I realized that I was very much alone with both Jin and Kurama, who appeared equally unwilling to speak with me.

_Holy crap, they're acting like I'm cheating on them or something,_ I thought sourly, twisting my cane between my palms._ Hell, I don't even like either of them like that. Jin's protective of me, sure, but he's not interested in me romantically. At least, I don't think he is. And I'm sure Kurama's just pissed because I'm socializing with people beyond his control... but still, this cold shoulder bit is a little too intense for my tastes. _

I stood up, about to tell them that I would be napping until breakfast (not because of their cold-and-distant acts, of course, but because I was merely tired, but take this as a hint that you should cut it out, please) when there came a knock on the suite's entry door. "I'll get it," I said, but Kurama and Jin both stood.

"Might be better if _we_ do it," said Jin, not looking at me.

"I agree," said Kurama, and the redhead brigade stalked out. I followed at a discreet distance (well, as discreet a distance as the suite would allow) and watched as they cautiously accepted a trolley bearing a very familiar duffel bag from a porter.

"My clothes!" I exclaimed as Jin took the bag and pushed the trolley into the hallway with his foot.

"Aye, so it seems," Jin said, and he held out the bag as if it were a snake about to strike. I ignored his behavior in order to read the card pinned with a needle to the bag's handle.

_Don't think you're too clever,_ the note read. _I had a feeling this would happen. Just don't screw up._

It bore no signature, but the scratchy writing and brusque tone screamed 'crotchety old psychic' like a tie-dyed poodle with a mohawk screams 'hello!'

"You certainly are receiving a lot of notes today," Kurama said, tone bordering on acidic.

I shot him a look that threatened violence if provoked. "It's from Genkai. Chill out. Seriously."

"Chill—?" Jin began, but I glared and he shut up.

"You've both been acting like I kicked a puppy in front of you ever since I got that note from Ryu," I told them. "What the heck did I do wrong? Sorry, but I don't tend to screen every vase of flowers for potential love notes and take out the ones from senders you guys don't like. Hell, neither of you even met this guy! He could be awesome and you'd never even know!"

"He could be working for Seishou," Kurama said, and Jin nodded in agreement.

"And I'm going to get stabbed by _another_ mugger next time I go outside," I retorted. "If we sit around dealing with the 'what ifs' all the time we'll never get anywhere at all. So take a giant breath, relax, and let me handle my own damn business, capiche?"

Jin looked flabbergasted. Kurama appeared ill. However, they both nodded before I wheeled around and stalked off to my bedroom, intent on changing out of my borrowed pajamas and back into my own clean clothes.

* * *

I wore the dress Kurama picked for me to dinner as an act of defiance. Judging by the look on his face when he saw me, this did not please him one bit. Botan, however, only had nice things to say about my hair (which she had done), my makeup (_Never imagined the grim reaper would apply my mascara for me,_ I thought with a giggle), and my choice of matching footwear, and Jin actually pushed back his grumpiness to compliment me with a grin before remembering that he was supposed to be sulking (which he was bad at considering his otherwise sunny disposition).

Yusuke, who had been checking out the hotel all day, sat sprawled across the couch when I came out of the bedroom in time for my rendezvous with Ryu. Kuwabara, Kurama, and Jin all sat with him, only more composed, and Hiei was nowhere to be seen, but he had been gone all day and I wasn't too worried about him.

"Ugh, girls," Yusuke said when Botan ceased her complimentary rant, and he rolled his eyes.

"Oh, do be quiet," Botan said with a sigh. She grabbed me by the shoulders and made me stand still, facing her. Her lips pursed. "Now, that cane doesn't exactly match, but since I doubt we can find one on short notice it will just have to do."

My grip tightened on the cane's handle. "Yeah, but this cane matches nothing, so in a _deep_ way doesn't it match _every_thing?"

That earned me a chuckle from Kurama. "She has you there," he said.

"Well, it's getting close to seven," Kuwabara said with a glance at his watch, and he stood up. "We'd better get going."

I gaped at him, but I wasn't the only one confused.

"'We'?" Kurama said, obviously not in Kuwabara's ultra exclusive loop.

"Sure," said Kuwabara. "Dani doesn't know the way to the restaurant, you guys have demon energy too strong to go out under cover, and since I'm the best judge of character I want to see this guy up close."

"Makes sense," Yusuke admitted.

"Be careful," Kurama warned.

"Aye, careful," said Jin. "N' good luck!"

Kuwabara waved a hand around. "Eh, we'll be fine. Dani'll scream if something goes wrong, won't you, Dani?"

"Like a banshee," I said, sounding a lot more chipper and a lot less nervous than I felt, and after one last look-over by Botan I allowed myself to be led out of the suite and into the wood-paneled hallway beyond. We got down to the elevator and pressed the button, and after the doors swung open we stepped inside. However, that's when Botan's voice called out to me one last time.

"Make sure to remember everything so you can tell me all about it when you get back!" she hollered, and as the elevator doors closed behind me and Kuwabara I called: "Even the napkin colors?"

Her reply was lost with a rumble and cogs and gears, and then we sailed downward.

"So, Ryu," Kuwabara said as the floors whipped by. "He seems thoughtful. Pretty flowers, at least."

"I don't know much about him," I admitted.

"I'm just glad you made a friend."

I frowned. "Some people aren't."

Kuwabara shrugged, windbreaker jacket rustling above his plain jeans and sneakers. "Yusuke doesn't care too much, but Jin and Kurama are concerned he's a spy. Seems too coincidental, meeting you and making friends so soon after you got here, you know?"

"I can see it," I relented, and Kuwabara shrugged before mock-punching me in the shoulder.

"Anyway, Hiei says that Ryu's not a known Seishou supporter, but once I get a feel for his intentions I should know enough to say for certain," Kuwabara went on. The elevator glided to a halt and a bell dinged above our heads. "Oh, here's our floor. You ready?"

I squared my shoulders, took a deep breath, and pulled out one of my most trusted clichés. "I'm as ready as I'll ever be," I said, and we stepped into a floor of the hotel I had never seen.

It wasn't like the lobby floor with its seemingly endless ceiling or reflective surfaces everywhere you looked. This floor (the third, proclaimed the button in the elevator) had been filled from top to bottom with lustrously dark wood. Brass light fixtures hung from the low ceiling of a huge, wide room in which people dressed in formal attire milled like frilly peacocks or dapper penguins. A set of red velvet ropes created a short pathway that led to a wooden podium, and behind this podium stood a man with a gray comb-over, beady eyes, and a tux. He even had a monocle, the tall-and-wiry-butler stereotype completed by this small yet hilarious detail.

"Look at all the tuxedos," I muttered as I studied the people gliding all around. A string quartet played in a distant and dim corner; several glittering couples danced to the soft tune in clouds of silk and satin.

"Those ballgowns made you look a little under-dressed. What's all over that one, diamonds?" Kuwabara whispered back as we approached the suited man. I noticed a row of curtained windows at the room's back, and in front of them someone had placed tables covered in white linen. I couldn't see them too well considering the dim mood lighting, but the white showed up well because there was a candle on each and every table.

The man in the suit—the fancy-schmancy _maître d'hôtel_, I realized—snapped open a slim leather book when we stopped in front of his stand. "Name, please," he intoned in a nasal voice, one I would typically (and correctly, in this case) associate with a sour-faced manservant from a bad James Bond knock-off or something.

"Um," I said, feeling like a bug amid such finery, "I'm Dani."

"So it's Dani, is it?" The man did not seem impressed, but his huge and pomaded mustache twitched atop his lip like a slug as his eyes flickered toward the open book in his hands. He traced whatever was written there with his gaze. "Dani, Dani..."

"I'm here to meet a man named Ryu," I added, and then his eyes popped open wide.

"Oh, so you're _that_ Dani," he said, staring at the list with new interest (probably feigned; he knew who I was and just loved dragging it out. I could see it in his eyes). His expression took on the look of someone more than a little eager to do some major sucking up. "Ryu-sama is waiting for you, Dani-san. Allow me to escort you?"

"Uh, I guess," I said, and I was about to follow him when the man's nose wrinkled. I realized that he was looking behind me.

"Is there something on my face?" Kuwabara said, uncomfortable in the spotlight.

"You," said the maitre d', looking down his nose, "are not allowed here."

I bristled. "He's with me."

"And _you_ are with Ryu-san," the guy I was beginning to hate with a passion said. "And besides, he is not dressed for this place." He addressed me instead of Kuwabara, who was standing in plain sight, but I suppose he considered my jeans-wearing-friend too beneath him to speak to directly.

"Neither am I," I said, scowling my very best as I gestured at my short cotton dress.

"But _you_ are on the guest list," he sneered, " and any friend of Ryu's deserves... how should I put this... 'special treatment'? So I'm afraid your plebian little friend will have to wait. Or leave. It's really none of my business." He turned to go. "Follow me, Dani-san."

"I'm not going with Kuwabara," I snapped, but then my tall friend put his arm around my shoulders.

"It's fine. Calm down," he murmured. His breath whispered through the hair on my head's crown. "If you need me, scream. I'll be nearby."

I moved away and turned to look at him. "Ya mean it?"

He smiled. "Sure." Then he turned toward the elevator and waved without looking at me. "See ya soon. Oh, and try and trip baldy, there. Or pop him one for me. Whichever works."

"I will," I called as the elevator pinged open and swallowed him. When I turned back around the waiter was glaring at me, but as soon as we made eye contact he schooled his features into a more pleasant mask.

"This way," he said, voice losing some of its silk, and we took the plunge into decadence and pomp. But as we moved a scent washed over me—a scent that smelled of warmth and honey and homey goodness—and when he took a sharp path around a table I realized just why that scent took hold of my attention with such unrelenting force.

There was, you see, a familiar sprig of purple flowers fountaining from the depths of his lapel.

_

* * *

_

NOTES:

_DrunkDani makes a comeback! Score!_

_Also, flowers. Smelling them. Is it all right to? (*Graph promptly ends her newscaster impersonation*) What do they all mean? And why are they everywhere? Do they hold some deeper significance? Or are they just a red herring meant to throw you off the scent (pun, the flowers smell, hardy har har) of the real hints? Hell if I know!_

_Ugh, why must I write Hiei moments all the time? Why? I just can't stop myself! It's like a disease! _

_I quote Breaking Benjamin's song "Rain" in this chapter, in reference to the lullaby Dani's mom would sing her. They're one of my favorite bands so give 'em a listen! _

_Kurama and Hiei are TIED IN THE PAIRING POLL! I'm closing the poll and will tell you when I reopen it. But for now, the votes are split right down the middle. Sweet!_

_**READ THIS IF NOTHING ELSE:** I have some bad news. I'm going on a two-week-long vacation to Egypt, Israel, Turkey, Greece, and Italy! YAY FOR ME! Bad for you. I'll try to have an update by the time I leave (this Friday) to make up for possible lack of internet on the ship, but rest assured I will write the normal chapters on my trip and upload them when I return. Who knows, though? I might have internet. At this point I really can't say for certain. But I WILL WRITE THE CHAPTERS AND GET THEM TO YOU AS SOON AS I CAN. This is NOT a voluntary slip-up of the schedule! (*Graph bows deeply to apologize for her absence, but please know that she will not be amused if you throw rotten vegetables at a stressed college student who just wants to relax with her best friend, AKA: her grandmother, and go to Egypt, the place she's been dreaming about ever since her father observed her fascination with Yu-Gi-Oh's Egyptian elements as a nine-year-old and indulged and deepened that obsession with a crap-ton of Egyptian mythology books*)_

_Anyway, you guys make writing so much fun and so very enjoyable. I really wish I could meet all of you and invite you to a giant Yu Yu Hakusho party, where I would gift you all with plushies and smoothies and popcorn balls and my famous cinnamon cupcakes, but alas I can't. My house would explode from all the wonderful feelings and people jammed inside. This MAJOR SUPERDUPER HUG AND A THANK YOU dedicated to the following people will have to suffice in the meantime: lostmoonchild, 0nfateswings, dumbrat, StrawberryxXxKisses, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Naitza-Kururugi, WickedLovelyDream, WickedLovelyDream, ilovemusicrox12, rain chant, Kai-chan94, Kaiya's Watergarden, ichixichigo, DoilyRox, j.d.y., xXLoveEachDayXx, Royal B A N D A I D, Reclun, crossyourteez, chocolateluvr13, AkaMizu-chan, Panda-chan31, BurningBodiesLikeIBurnBridges (thanks for leaving me so many nice comments!), Wolf-Cry-Night, fluffyfoxears, Crescent Venus, Foxgirl Ray, and ShadowFireFox13!_


	27. Chapter 27: 100 Percent

Future Talk

Chapter 27:

"100%"

* * *

There comes a point when any smell gets annoying. This is typically the result of an overabundance of said smell. A woman who drowns herself in perfume certainly makes people prefer to be upwind of her; a chef saturated in the scents of his trade requires a bath after work in order not to ward people off with his spice-laden cologne; an individual who works in the fishing industry might smell so much like cod after a day at the cannery that they can't go out until they scrubs\ the scent from their skin with steel wool. Pleasant scents, disgusting scents, neutral scents—all of them have the potential to be repugnant if they come upon you _en masse,_ and _en masse _they most certainly were when I sat down at the table with Ryu and found myself staring at a humongous bouquet of familiar purple bells, a sprig of the same in the waiter's lapel, and an even bigger sprig of them in Ryu's jacket pocket.

Speaking of Ryu, he stood up when I approached and only sat down after the waiter pulled my chair out. We smiled at each other across the table, perhaps a little awkwardly considering that we had an audience practically salivating to serve us... well, to serve Ryu. The waiter wouldn't stop staring at him like a loyal dog.

"You may go," Ryu said a moment later, just as uncomfortable with the attention as I was. "I'll call when I need you."

The waiter's face fell, crestfallen, but he left anyway.

"He's certainly good at his job," I muttered, not quite intending for Ryu to hear, but he did anyway and nodded in agreement.

"Maybe _too_ good."

"But you can't fire him?"

"Yeah," said Ryu, and then something seemed to dawn in the recesses of his eyes. "Wait a minute..."

"I guessed you had something to do with this hotel's administration when Grumpy McWaiter-Pants over there seemed like he was about to wet his, well, _pants_ at the sound of your name," I said, toying with one of the gilded forks on the tabletop. The utensil had been patterned with—you guessed it—the stylized rendition of one of the purple flowers. "I mean, I doubted it at first because you can't be much older than I am, but hey, anything's possible. So indulge me, Ryu—who exactly are you?"

He stared down at his lap and eventually managed: "The owner. Well, principle stockholder. This hotel is the haunt of a lot of my associates. I just got lucky when it came to putting my name on the deed."

"Lucky?"

"My father built it," he explained, "but he didn't will it to me when he died. We were... estranged. I had to fight to get where I am now." I could see his discomfort in the air between us.

"Did you have any help?" I asked, suspicions rising. _Any dark-and-scary help from another world, possibly? One whom you rent out rooms to so they can host evil-sounding parties?_

But Ryu, alas, shook his head. "My mother died in childbirth and I have no siblings. It was only me and my father, although he wanted nothing to do with me."

"I'm sorry," I said, not knowing what else to say.

"It's in the past," said Ryu.

_Change the subject, Dani_, I told myself, and I blurted: "So what's up with all the flowers?"

"Flowers?" He seemed bamboozled by this question.

"You know, the flowers," I said, waving my hand at the massive bunch on our table. They had been placed off-center so we could see one another, but there was no denying their abundant presence. " I noticed them ever since I started staying here." I glanced at the table and picked up the small plate on my right. "They're even on here, see?"

Ryu stared at the golden symbol on the dish with amusement. "The breadflower is just the hotel's insignia, Dani. They grow wild in this region."

"No special significance or something?" I asked, and I set the plate down with a small, bell-like clink.

He looked thoughtful. "Well, they're a relative of the foxglove plant..."

_Knew it,_ I thought.

"...but no, there's nothing special about them. I just like them, that's all."

"They are pretty," I said, and thought: _Even if they do smell so obnoxious. _

Just then, another waiter in a suit popped up. "The wine you requested," he proclaimed, pushing a cart with a bottle, glasses, and a decanter arranged on its top toward our table. During the spectacle of numerous decantings and pourings and tastings, I let my attention wander. That was when I noticed just how many people actually inside the restaurant: dozens of men and women dressed in their finest milled about, talking and chatting and drinking, and as I stared at their frilled number I noticed someone rather... familiar.

He sat on a deep leather chair, pale hands clenching into the upholstery like biting cobras, and dark hair the color of sin spilled over them and onto the floor. I could tell he was powerfully built and very tall, but I could not discern the color of his eyes because his face was covered by, of all things, a metal mask. The mask's cold features seemed serene, peaceful, but I could tell that the owner felt anything but good given the way his hands gripped the chair in desperation, or maybe even anger.

So, all in all, he looked a hell of a lot like Hiei's projected image of Seishou, minus the burning golden eyes.

"Something wrong?" Ryu asked, pulling my attention back to him.

"No," I replied, heart going nuts in my chest. "No, nothing's wrong." I grabbed my wineglass and drank a sip. "Mmm, good." My hand shook.

"I love this vintage," he said, a tad apologetically. "I'm sorry I didn't ask you if you wanted something different. Would you like anything else?"

"Oh, no," I said, trying to appear offhanded and casual and undoubtedly failing miserably. The Seishou look-alike, much to my chagrin, was sitting behind Ryu and about twenty feet away, so it took a lot to keep from looking at him every five seconds. I felt like throwing up. Nerves obviously didn't care about me seeming good and composed.

"I ordered the best off the menu, so you can sample everything you want," Ryu went on, and then he stopped. "What are you looking at?"

"Nothing!" I yelped.

His eyes narrowed, brow furrowing like golden soil, and he glanced over his shoulder. "The man in the mask?" he said in a low voice.

I hesitated.

"That's a yes, I can tell," Ryu whispered. "Yeah, he's a strange one all right, but you probably shouldn't stare so much."

"Strange how?" I asked, jumping at the chance to learn something, anything, that the others didn't know.

"Besides the obvious?" Ryu asked. When I looked confused he put his hand over his face until only his eyes showed violet between his spread fingers. "You know. The mask."

"Oh, yeah," I said, cheeks heating. "That."

He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. The motion drew attention to his clothes, and with a start I realized that he, like me, was so under-dressed it was almost criminal. He wore a leather jacket (black), over a crisp shirt (white), and if I was not mistaken I could see the cuff of his denim jeans peeking out from the white tablecloth. Owning the hotel seemed to have its perks.

"He's rented one of the larger ballrooms for a party," Ryu said.

"A party?"

"Mmm-hm."

"What kind of party?" I asked.

"Curious, are we?" he said, smiling, and he shook his head. "Sorry, but that's confidential. Although..."

He seemed lost in thought when I said: "Although what?"

"I'm invited, since I'm the host, and I'm allowed a guest," he said in a low voice, eyes on me. "Maybe... well, I'll send you a note with the details. The Terrace has a good invitation system."

I had no idea what 'The Terrace' was, but I filed the name away for future reference with a smile and a 'thank you.'

Pleased by my pleasant acquiescence, he said: "I told him the party was a dumb idea, but he won't listen to me. He's stubborn. But that's what I like about him."

I went out on a limb, fishing. "So I take it you know the guy pretty well?"

He shrugged. "Sort of. We have similar interests, but he's a bit more..."

"What?"

"Well, he's a bit more fanatical than I am," Ryu admitted, and he looked momentarily disgruntled. "It's annoying. Don't quite know why I put up with it."

"And these interests are?" I wheedled, but Ryu only smiled.

"They're unimportant, and they're actually kind of boring now that I think about it."

My voice came out more engaged than I had planned. "I'm sure they're not!"

A measured smile topped with glittering eyes made me think I had pushed too far, but Ryu actually seemed pleased. Before I could even blink he had leaned forward and placed his hand atop mine, sandwiching my fingers between his and the tabletop.

"I knew from the moment I met you that you would be like this," he said, laughing. "You're all about others, right?"

I stared at him, struck dumb. His eyes had darkened from happy gooseberry to the violet of a tyrant's cloak, intense and unknowable, but he still seemed vulnerable somehow. The contrast made me shiver.

"You're pure and selfless," he said confidently. "You care for others more than yourself. You want to understand them so you never mistake them for something they're not."

"You give me way too much credit!" I protested with a splutter, shocked that he had come to such a conclusion in so short a time. It was a flattering one, but it was one that had no merit since we had only just met and I was probably one of the most selfish people on earth.

"No I don't," was his insistent reply. "You've just learned from your own experiences. So many people, people like us, get self-centered after being treated differently for so long, but not you. You—"

"'People like us'?" I had interrupted him but I didn't really care. "What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

He pulled back a bit, checking himself, because his voice had risen above our heads like thunder, and several people had turned our way. The man in the mask, however, hadn't moved an inch.

"Sorry," he said, cheeks going dark with self-consciousness. "I get carried away sometimes."

"It's fine."

A smile so warm it could start a fire flew my way. "See? Understanding."

I folded and unfolded my napkin; sweat from my palms left creases in the heavy damask. "You don't know me," I mumbled, blushing, and I looked up at him through narrowed eyes. "Don't pretend like you do."

He grinned, but when I didn't smile back his eyes grew troubled, clouds overshadowing the purple in a rush.

"I won't get into it," he said, "but I didn't have a good life. I'm not what my father wanted. I suffered for it."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you're like me," he said. "Different." He leaned forward across the table, arms jostling the plates and forks.

"Forgive me for being an idiot," I said dryly, moving my hands to my lap so he couldn't grab them, "but I don't see how you're different. Not in the way I am, at least."

A dark chuckle without humor. "I'm keeping that to myself for now. Sorry for being so obtuse."

"Whatever," I huffed.

He sat back. I sat back. We avoided looking at one another until the waiter arrived with our food, and when we dug into it we did not speak more than a few pleasantries about how good it all tasted. I can't remember what we ate that night—my mind spun with echoes of Ryu's words and the implications they wrought. Midway through dessert, however, he blurted out the key to the rest of our conversation.

"Remember how I said that me and the man in the mask had similar interests?"

I put down my fork, cake untasted. "Yeah."

He, like me, ate nothing. "He's different, too. Like me and you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Only I bet you can't tell me about that, can you."

"Sorry," he said, eyes sad, "but it's best if I keep that a secret."

"Sure. Whatever floats your boat."

Ryu steepled his fingers, elbows on the table and lips pressed against his thumbs. I could tell he didn't know where to go from there.

I started to get annoyed at that point. "Look, if it's really so hard to talk to me—"

"It's just complicated," he said.

"Then simplify it." My voice came out harsh. "It can't be _that_ bad."

Incensed, he said: "It's not!"

"Then why all this beating around the bush?"

More silence and staring, and then: "Do you ever imagine what it would be like if everyone else had a leg like yours?"

I froze, stopped cold, and when I recovered from the shock of that question I managed: "You asked me that already."

"Did I?" His vapid expression seemed calculated.

I kept my tone flat, but inside I was seething with... I don't quite know what, actually. "Yeah, you did," I said. "Last night in the garden."

"I want you to tell me again," he said. He smiled like he wasn't bringing up a painful subject. "Say it."

I took in a shaking breath.

A sudden turn toward pleading made me weaken. "Please," he said. "Please?"

"I've thought about it," I admitted with a hiss.

He leaned toward me again. "What did you think, when you thought about it?" he murmured.

It took me a long time to answer, but when I did I said: "I thought that it might... make people understand me better."

He just nodded.

"And besides," I said, "if _everyone_ were crippled, then _I'd_ be normal."

"That's my point!" he said suddenly, fist colliding with his knee. "you want people to suffer as you have, so you're normal!"

"That's not it at all!" Shock—did he really think me so vicious?—made speaking difficult. "I want people to get me so they don't judge me right away, but that _doesn't_ mean that I want to cripple someone! There's a huge difference between wanting people to know that their staring is offensive and actually wanting people to suffer."

"I didn't judge you," he said, fidgeting as if I had cowed him just a bit. He looked at the table as if he could see straight through it to the leg hiding beneath. "But I've thought about what it would be like, too," he said, "if people shared my... differences. I wonder, sometimes, how my life could have been better if people understood me without fear and prejudice coloring their point of view." The words seemed rehearsed, like he'd repeated them many times to himself in a mirror, and he laughed, eyes steady and determined. "Understanding between everyone, everywhere... it's my dream."

I got what he was saying on a conceptual level (God knows I'd thought about it before) but as far as making that dream into a reality... I didn't get how that could ever be done. Not really, anyway. People are just too different, too used to their own personal realities and too comfortable with what's familiar to step outside their shells and see things without a haze of their own perception clouding their judgment and emotion. But then again, how could I ever understand Ryu when I was missing so much information on his past and his goals?

"My masked friend over there," Ryu went on, and he paused a long time before saying: "Well, he wants the same thing as me, but he actually has the skills to make that happen. I just have the time and energy. It's why we're working together. To achieve total understanding."

Staring at Ryu was easy to do; his own eyes seemed so far away that I figured he didn't notice my eyes flickering from him to Seishou every few seconds. However, I looked only at him when his gaze returned to me with a snap of purple fire.

"You get it, right?" he said in a voice that wanted, more than anything, for me to comprehend. "You know what I'm trying to do, don't you?"

I still didn't, but I didn't want him to know that, and that's why I just said: "Good luck."

* * *

The suite door shut behind me with a thump. Silhouettes of the crew made the living room's gloom seem alive, which I guess it was considering how many people filled it.

"You'll never guess what I learned," I said in a sing-song voice. _Payback time for being such a jerk to me, Kurama._

Someone stood up. "Did it go well?" Kuwabara's voice asked.

"Oh, very well," I said, flouncing inside.

"Is he an enemy or isn't he?" said Kurama, also standing up. I suppressed an insidious smile. Botan, on one of the couches, flicked on a lamp. Jin sat next to her. Yusuke stood by the window, and Hiei was not there.

"Oh, I'll get there," I said, smiling sweetly. Kurama and Kuwabara did not look happy. "We had a wonderful dinner and great wine. The napkins were bone colored with gold stitching, and—"

"What makes you think we care about shit like that?" Yusuke growled.

"Botan cares," I said, as prim as a daisy in May, and she looked elated as I took a seat next to her and filled her in on every detail I could think of. Once I was through I allowed everyone to simmer in silence before ending the suspense by spearheading the discussion.

"Well, his name's Ryu, but you all knew that," I said, crossing my legs and folding my hands in my lap. "And, low and behold, he owns this hotel. I'm a lucky girl."

Botan squealed. Kuwabara and Yusuke rolled their eyes.

"Owns it, you say?" Kurama asked.

"Uh-huh." I tugged a pin out of my hair and started to comb it with my fingers.

An eye twitched when I did not go on. "And I assume you have more to tell us."

I examined a strand of hair for split ends. "Weee-ell..."

"If you have nothing, don't waste our time," the fox said, looking as dangerous as I had ever seen him, and he turned on his heels and walked toward the door. I have no idea where he meant to go, but I waited until his hand hit the knob before saying, in a voice as casual as I could make it: "Seishou was in the restaurant, too."

Dead silence. I began to braid my hair into a long tail, fingers tugging the strands with practiced ease.

"I saw him sitting in a chair, wearing a metal mask, but it was him and yes, I'm sure of it. I asked Ryu about him, and he said that the man is having a party in a place called 'The Terrace'. You may want to check it out. Y'know, recon and all?" I dropped the braid and looked at Yusuke. "You guys do that, right?"

He closed his mouth, swallowed, and said: "Uh, yeah, we do."

"Good!" I stood up and stretched. "Man, I'm beat. Bedtime!"

This time it was Kurama who called me back into the room. "What else?" he said, trying to be nice about it despite how annoyingly vague _I_ was trying to be.

"Oh, not much," I said, toying with the doorknob to my room. "Just that Ryu and Seishou are working together very closely, that's all."

A chorus of "WHAT?"s made the room explode.

"So he _is_ an enemy!" Botan exclaimed. "Phooey! He sounds like a good catch!"

"Well," I said, walking toward them again, "I'm not so sure at this point. He's an ally of Seishou's at the very least. Which makes him an enemy, I guess. There's a saying about it. I don't know." I decided, then, not to be as infuriating from that point on. The show was over.

"The saying is 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend,' which doesn't really apply to this situation," Kurama said. His hands twitched at his sides.

"Whatever," I said. "The point is that he _may_ be an enemy, but he's an enemy with _connections_." They all looked nonplussed. "Don't you see what this _means_?"

No one said anything, but Kurama's jaw went slack, then tight again, and then his eyes narrowed. I could tell from his slowly building smile that he knew exactly what I was thinking about.

"I can get close to him!" I blurted when no one else caught on. "If I get close to him he'll tell me everything we want to know about Seishou's plans and all that stuff. This is perfect!"

Kurama looked like Christmas had come early (which is ironic considering his festive hair and eye coloring).

"Hold on," said Botan, looking horrified, "you're not going to _seduce_ Ryu, are you?"

I grinned. "You bet I am!"

"It's perfect, Dani-san," Kurama said, eyes glittering in satisfaction. "Seduce him, get him to fall for you, and he's ours."

"Wait, Dani's not seducing nobody!" Jin said, speaking for the first time since I got back.

"Oh, you're right, Jin, how could I forget that I don't have the rack for that?" I snapped sarcastically. Kuwabara looked equal parts amused and shocked that I'd made a disparaging comment about my own figure (or maybe he was surprised I even brought it up at all; aren't Japanese women supposed to be pretty demure?). Yusuke, on the other hand, just nodded, but I decided not to take offense. "Guess we'll just have to rely on Botan to do the seducing!"

Jin's face changed from appalled to angry. No trace of his typical cheer remained.

"If I say _you_ can't do it," he said, "then Botan _definitely_ can't do it!" We all stared at him, silent, and then Jin went as red as his hair. "I mean, I..."

I glanced at Botan. She was blushing, the faint pearly-pink tinge to her cheeks making her eyes and hair and pale complexion glow, and she was staring straight at Jin, who in turn did his best to look at anything but her.

"Then it has to be me," I said. Botan's eyes said she was seeing the wind demon in a whole new light. "Besides, I have a hold on Ryu already, I think."

"What makes you say that?" Kuwabara asked.

I thought about it before replying, and when I did I spoke slowly and with care.

"He told me that he was once a victim of misguided preconceptions," I said.

Kurama wasn't buying the euphemism. "You mean prejudices," he said, voice certain.

Sighing made my cheeks puff out like a blowfish's. "It sounds so harsh when you put it like that. I don't blame people for misunderstanding my bum leg or whatever."

"Does Ryu?" Kurama asked.

"I think so," I admitted. "He kept saying... well, he never really said it out loud; he just kept _hinting_ about how I should want to make people suffer the way I have. It gave me the creeps, but..."

"But what?" Botan said, tearing her eyes away from Jin, who had gotten up to join Yusuke at the window. The back of his neck was beet red.

"But I think..." I shook my head. "No, you're gonna take this the wrong way."

"No we won't!" said Kuwabara, expression broadcasting earnestness and trust, and I felt myself waver.

"Promise?" I asked.

Kuwabara and Botan both nodded right away. Kurama and Jin took a little while longer, but Yusuke only scoffed at me. I decided to ignore him.

"I think Ryu has good intentions," I admitted slowly. Kurama and Yusuke's eyes narrowed, but I held up a hand. "I can't speak for Seishou himself. From what you told me, I think he's a little bitch who needs to be put in his place. But Ryu's different. He kept talking about tearing down prejudices and making people understand each other, and that can't be that bad of a goal, can it?"

Silence (in which many glances were exchanged) reigned, and then Kurama spoke.

"Power is neutral, Dani," Kurama said. "Like with any weapon, it's the holder who decides whether or not it's used for good or evil."

"Yeah, and Ryu's using it for good!" I shot at him, and he only looked morose.

"Seishou and Ryu are both looking for power," he said, "and even though one might be good and one might be evil, they are working _together_. Seishou could be using Ryu like another tool of war, like an instrument that exists just so he can get what he wants. Ryu could be helping a madman take over the world with the best intentions of us all, but that doesn't excuse him from what he's doing."

"But you can't know that he's 100% evil or whatever, he's—"

A single look shut me up. "And you can't know if he's 100% good," Kurama said. "Understanding between people of all walks of life is an admirable goal, but sometimes the ends don't justify the means. Militant dictators take over with promises of equality and peace. Religious leaders preach that their loving gods want to kill infidels and heretics. It's just how it all works."

"He said he's like me," I murmured, throat thickening with tears. "That he's different."

"And he's using that weakness of yours to gain your sympathy and trust," Kurama said without a trace of venom. I shot him a look, however, that overflowed poison. "It's a common enough war tactic. I'm afraid that you're the most susceptible of us all."

"Yeah, you're right," I snapped. "The weak little cripple'll be the death of us. Why don't you just shoot me now with one of your stupid war instruments and put me out of my misery?"

Mouths dropped open. Botan paled. But, to my relief, no one said a word when I walked into the bedroom and shut the door behind me. I crawled into bed still dressed in my nice clothes, and as I switched off the lamp and hugged a pillow to my chest I could hear their voices rising in the room beyond.

Botan followed me in not long later, but she didn't try to talk to me as we shared our bed in the dark. I listened to her breathing even out with sleep, thinking all the while of Ryu and his dreams.

_Can a person who just wants people to understand one another really be that bad?_ I thought.

_Power is an instrument,_ I could hear Kurama's voice saying.

_And Ryu's a good user,_ I thought back. _He kept trying to see the best in me. He wants what's good for us._

_Or does he? a_ smaller voice whispered. _You said it yourself: he kept hinting that people should suffer for what they're done to you, to him. Can he really be on of the 'good users' if he's willing to hurt someone?_

_I'm sure he was just saying that to make a point, _I thought, rationalizing the notion.

_Or was he? _the small voice said.

_He wants what's good for us! _I thought, almost screaming the words in my skull. I pulled the pillow out from under my head and pressed it to my face, trying to drown out my sprinting thoughts with muffled feathers and silk.

_Us?_ the-voice-that-was-mine repeated despite the barrier. It laughed, cruel and cold. _Who's 'us'? You and Ryu, or the people who've _hurtyou_?_

And to that I had no pithy response, no quick come-back, because I knew—the darker, clearer part of me just _knew_—that the little voice was probably right.

_

* * *

_

NOTE:

_If Kurama is willing to use Dani in such a way, I don't think he likes her. And does Jin have a little crush on Botan? What? WHAT? Ryu has so many misconceptions of Dani, it's ridiculous..._

_Also, I might kinda sorta be back in town, and, consequently, in action. ZOMG GRAPH IS BACK IN BUSINESS. Tues-tacular updates shall resume from this point hence. This one was a bit short because I fell out of my rhythm, but rest assured the others will the the customary length of roughly 7,000 words... you guys are spoiled, ha ha (kidding!)._

_Title credits: Angelspit!_

_I'm going to start omitting pairings, or at least weeding them out slowly. I feel like Dani has too many, as did many of you in your reviews (which I agreed with!). Also, remember that not all types of 'like' are good, or bad, or even noteworthy. There's loving, friendly, obsessive... think about it. Apply to areas needed. Feel the relief, yes? _

_And to those who wished me a good trip: THANK YOU FOR BEING SO DAMN NICE, and yes, it was awesome. I missed you all, though, and I'm glad to be back and within reach. _

_Weirdly, I can recognize the little ID images that my frequent reader's use. So I know names and pics. It's funny, at least to me._

_Loverly thanks to my loverly reviewers and favoriters, because you put up with me being dumb. I LOVE YOU ALL! Reclun, miyakomono, dumbrat, colbub, ichixichigo, heve-chan, kurochanwithwings, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Wolf-Cry-Night, TheWhiteTigerAllia, Kaiya's Watergarden, ilovemusicrox12, ShadowFireFox13, kaitou angel, rain chant, Lady of the Gags, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., AkaMizu-chan, Naitza-Kururugi, Kai-Chan94, VampireOnFire, DoilyRox, crossyourteez, 0nfateswings, Otaku Wench, WorldsAngel, the Under-Cover Fangirl, Foxgirl Ray, Carol Vaz, Raging Lulu, rubyparker93, Pirazz, Crescent Venus, scrubbadubdub, Jade elf, Turtle Kid, Wicked Lovely Dream!_


	28. Chapter 28: Creep

Future Talk

Chapter 28:

"Creep"

* * *

Our plan... well, my plan... to seduce Ryu and pump information out of him never got off the ground. The party came up too soon, he never sent me an invitation like he promised, and the night before Seishou's gala was scheduled to happen I found myself watching a movie in the bedroom I shared with Botan.

She wasn't one for horror films, or action flicks, or mystery, but she did love comedy and romance (fanfictions once again prevail!), so we ended up watching some drama film about a woman with amnesia who is trying to rediscover her old life, only to find out that she's the long-lost-fiancé of a prince, but as much as Botan was invested in the characters and setting, I was invested in making fun of them.

"Look at her hair!" I cackled, flinging popcorn at the screen. "What time period is that from, 1900?"

"Dani!" Botan squealed, throwing popcorn at me. "Be nice! Your hair isn't from any time period at all!"

"As long as it's not the one her's is in!"

I tossed more corn at her. She whacked me across the face with a pillow. I retaliated as such. Had we been in our underwear and had I been a bit more buxom, it could have been a recipe for many wonderful yuri fics or teen-boy fantasies. As it was, we merely courted disaster by threatening every lamp in reach with its impending and pillowy doom. Eventually our revelry reached the ears of the others, however (the call of the endangered lamps is hard to ignore, I suppose) and the door to our room opened with an ominous creak.

Botan's first reaction was to scream, high-pitched and loud, because that's just Botan. I yelled incoherently at the top of my lungs, the burst of hysterically happy-yet-startled syllables punctuated by both mine and Botan's pillows flying across the room. They biffed the person in the doorway's face and fell to the floor, and Kurama seemed unamused. Or did he look tickled, slightly, with that sparkle in his eye? I couldn't tell. His evil and benevolent moods were hard to distinguish.

Botan leveled a finger at him, grabbed another pillow, and hid behind it. "This is a girl's room! You can't just barge in like that, you know!"

"Yeah!" I said, standing on my knees in the middle of our mattress. I put my hands on my hips and glared. I did not pick up on the situation's cliche-ness until it was far too late. "Either throw popcorn, eat popcorn, whack Botan with a pillow, or leave!"

"Hey!" said Botan. "Whack Dani with a pillow, not me!"

I grabbed another handful of popcorn out of the bowl and threw it at her. She caught most of it in her mouth. My hands dropped to my sides in awe. Kurama clapped.

"I think," he said slowly, "that since you aren't being murdered, which is what I first assumed when I heard the two of you screaming like so many banshees—"

I looked at Botan. She looked at me. We traded sheepish grins.

"—that I will have to stay, under the circumstances."

The bottom dropped out of my otherwise happy stomach.

"Well, you heard the conditions we laid out!" Botan said, rising up beside me on her knees. "Throw, eat, or whack!"

"Eat," said Kurama. His eyes scanned the room. "Eat, that is, if there's any left that's not on the floor."

I looked around. Popcorn and empty soda cans coated the floor and bed like a lumpy carpet. We had really done a number on the room; that much was certain.

"Of course there's more!" Botan said, incensed. "See how many bowls we have up here!" Indeed, roughly six gigantic mixing bowls sat between us. Botan and I had popped almost three boxes of popcorn in a fit of whimsey.

Kurama eyed the bed dubiously. "That's not all you have up there."

I looked. The entire bed was a sea of popcorn and empty candy wrappers. "He has a point," I said, and Botan shushed me. "There's too much on this bed."

"There's room on the floor," she said.

"But the bed's so much more comfy," I said.

Botan rolled her eyes. "No, not for us, silly—for the popcorn!"

"We can't just dump it down there!"

"Sure we can! That's what roomservice is for," Botan said, and she pushed all the popcorn off the bed and onto the floor in a shower of butter and salt. "Scoot over and make room!"

I'm not sure how we ended up with me in the middle, Botan on my left, and Kurama on my right, but somehow we all wound up leaning on the headboard like tin soldiers in a row, a bowl of popcorn sitting on my lap so everyone could reach it. Botan pressed play and we settled in to watch.

Kurama leaned over. "What is the plot of this film?" he said in my ear.

"Well," I replied, covering my nerves with talk, "she," (I pointed), "has amnesia, and is engaged to him, the prince," (I pointed again). "She wants to discover her past, but this guy," (another point). "fell in love with her before she found out who her fiance was, and now they're all trying to figure out who she belongs with now that she's just about a different person in all the ways that really matter. There's also a subplot about how her job got given to her old best friend who won't give it back and now isn't really her friend at all, but who is her sister-in-law now that she's married the amnesia girl's older brother."

Kurama seemed amused-yet-perturbed. "Oh. I see."

"Yeah, I know, it's pretty dumb."

"Shh!" said Botan.

"Well look at them!" I said. "Her hair is totally outdated and the guys are treating her like a grill they split the cost of! It's like they're trying to decide who gets to serve up the first round of hotdogs. Feminists probably protested this in droves."

"Well, if you don't like it then we can pick something else," Botan said, miffed, but just then the amnesia girl shared a kiss with her the prince below the sounds of soaring and triumphant violins, and the credits started to roll. "It's over anyway." She handed me the remote with a smug smile.

"_Thank _you!" I flipped to the movie order section of the TV and started thumbing through the genres. "Ah, here we go—the best section of the lot." I squinted at the screen. "'The Sleeping Giant.' Sounds obtuse. 'Capture.' Captivating, surely, but probably a bit too constricting. Ah, here we go: 'Curse: The Banshee's Grudge.' Promises to be a shrieking good time, eh? It'll do."

Kurama seemed appreciative of my commentary on each title, chuckling when appropriate, but Botan went pale. She brandished one of the empty popcorn bowls in front of herself like a shield.

"Horror?" she said, equal parts outraged and uncomfortable. "Really, Dani, horror? I told you how much I hated it!"

"And I told you how much I disliked romance but noooo, we had to watch your stupid movie anyway. It's my turn. It's only fair."

"She has a point," Kurama said, quelling Botan's protests, and she sulked but had nothing more to say.

The movie started shortly after, and I was pleased with it. Japanese horror—films like "Ringu," "Juon," and many more—had always been more scary than any American movie (Ridley Scott's "Alien," just about everything by Alfred Hitchcock, and "Rosemary's Baby" were notable exceptions, but there weren't all that many others). This film was not a disappointment, with a complex storyline, good acting, and special effects that were surprisingly impressive. The three of us ended up watching the movie in total silence, eyes glued to the screen while our hands blindly groped for the popcorn. We spilled most of it, too intent on the movie to pay attention to where we were scattering kernels. Even Kurama dropped more than a few pieces down his front, but he didn't notice them fall as far as I could tell.

Likewise, I didn't notice Botan fall asleep until I felt her breath on my neck. Her head had lolled into my shoulder, disrupting my concentration on the film.

"Is she asleep?"

Kurama's soft voice made me jump. "Don't whisper!" I hissed. "You scared me!"

"Sorry," he said, and then he said in an overloud voice: "So is she asleep?"

That made me jump even worse. "Don't do that!" I said.

"Don't do what?" His eyes were wide, innocent, and infuriating, and I chose not to answer him. But then, in a very quiet and tense scene of the movie, he said: "I was wondering—"

"KYAH!" I screamed, throwing the popcorn bowl into the air. Botan woke up with a snort, stared at me with my hands clamped over my mouth, shook her head, and leaned back against the headboard. She was asleep in seconds.

Kurama plucked a piece of corn out of his hair, stared at it held between his thumb and forefinger, and raised an eyebrow before putting the morsel on his tongue. It looked like he was wearing a headdress made of popcorn as he chewed.

"You scared me," I squeaked, sitting bolt upright as I stared at him. My heart ran a marathon inside my chest.

"You scare easily, I've noticed," he replied, tossing his hair to dislodge al lthe popcorn clinging to it. "Why do you prefer movies like these if you're scared of them?"

I shrugged, settling back into my seat. "Beats the alternative."

"Sappy romance?"

That got a giggle out of me. "Kind of. What I really meant was that I think I'd be more scared of life if I didn't watch horror movies."

"I'm not sure I follow."

I wasn't sure I did, either, so I just started babbling. "Think of this movie as a scapegoat," I said. "I can be as scared of the banshee as I want, but it'll never hurt me if I don't let it. It's better for me to be scared of this than live in fear of living, you know? I spend all my fear on ghosts so nothing else can scare me." I thought about it. "I bet people go skydiving for the same reasons."

"At any rate," Kurama said, clearing his throat, "I was wondering something."

I felt much more at ease now that we had been talking, though I was still unconvinced that Kurama's foul mood from the day before had evaporated, and I reminded myself not to let my guard down too much. "What were you wondering?" I asked.

He didn't say anything for a long time (probably because the scene on the TV was an intense one), but during a lull in the action he said: "How much do you like Ryu?"

That gave me pause, and not in a good way. I stared straight ahead, barely registering the banshee-the-movie was-named-for's big reveal and the heroine's subsequent flee for her life.

"Kind of a weird question," I murmured as someone was eaten from the inside out by a ghost.

Kurama's eyes didn't waver from the screen, but his face seemed to writhe in the movie's ever-changing light. He seemed almost lupine; fierce in a wild way that I could not comprehend.

"Please answer," he said.

I thought about it, heart quickening. "I… sympathize with him," I said slowly. "He didn't ever tell me what he meant when he said that he'd faced prejudices, but I still… have to understand him. On principle. Does that make sense?"

Kurama's head titled to the side as he studied a person being torn in half by the banshee's shriek. "In a way," he mused, "it does make sense. Birds of a feather."

"Yeah."

"What I said to you yesterday was harsh," he said. "I called you weak, and I apologize for that."

"Thank you."

"I was angry. So much of what is happening has gone according to my plans, but you and Ryu... you defied all logic. It scared me, but not in a way I could write off as a mere movie phantom. And I hate being scared." He swallowed, the bob of his Adam's apple giving his annoyance away. "I took it out on you. Forgive me."

My unease softened, though into what I do not know. "Of course."

He looked sideways at me, green eyes gone black in the dark. "The only thing I will not apologize for," he continued, "is when I called you the most susceptible to pity's snare, because it's true. It's nothing shameful if you've found a person to empathize with. It is, however, dangerous if you give them all your trust. You open yourself up to be used to the detriment of us all."

My voice was so soft even I could barely hear it, but somehow Kurama did, too. "I know," I whispered, looking down at my hands. They seemed lineless and small, white on white and without depth. One was more muscular than the other from gripping the handle of my cane. It seemed like someone else's hand.

Kurama did not reply, not right away. "You know?" he repeated.

"Yeah. I thought about it last night." I took a deep, shuddering breath. "Ryu's got a vicious streak that I don't have. We're not the same, not in the way he wants me to think we are."

"How so?"

Bitterness made my teeth ache. "Because I'm not looking for revenge," I said, "and I think he might be, at least on the inside where he can't see his own hatred festering away in the dark." I looked at Kurama. "I don't hate people who don't understand me. I think Ryu does. I'm afraid of what his version of making people 'understand' might be. We have to stop him and Seishou both. I was wrong."

The man finally looked at me dead on, and his mouth had been drawn into a thin, hard line. I couldn't read him, couldn't read him at all, and that frightened me more than any curse.

"You cannot spare any kindness the next time you and Ryu meet," Kurama said. "You must detach yourself from your own feelings, treat your interaction like a scene from a drama or a play. Convince him you are on his side but give him no quarter and spare no room for doubt. Can you do that?"

It hurt me to admit that I could, and gladly. "Yes," I said.

"You must learn all there is to learn and keep his trust in your hand. You cannot afford mistakes."

"I understand."

"And you must be ready to betray him." Kurama's eyes burned into mine, lighting up the dark like Roman candles. The appeared almost gold, like buttery quicksilver dancing in flickers of light from the television screen. "Can you do that?"

"Yes." I breathed deeply again. "He's giving us cripples a bad name."

* * *

I woke up in the morning to the sound of a knock on the door. Botan mumbled in her sleep, but I threw the covers off with a shower of stray popcorn and hopped to the door on my good foot. I could hardly see straight in the light that came pouring in.

"What time is it?" I said through a yawn. I leaned on the door, trying to stay upright.

"Seven AM," Kuwabara said. He sounded as tired as I felt. "A bellhop guy came to the front door with this. It's for you. See? 'Da-ni.'" He pointed at the katakana characters penned onto the front of the pale envelope. "Is that how you spell it?"

"I guess," I said, taking the paper from him.

"And hey, what the heck is your last name?" he asked, but I was too busy dropping my jaw on the floor to answer.

"Is this what I think it is?" I asked slowly.

He leaned forward to see, effectively blocking the vision of the paper in my hands. "Let's see… Uh, it's hard to read upside-down, but I think it says 'You are cordially invited to'…" He stood up straight and deadpanned: "No way."

We stared at one another, faces expressionless, and then turned as one toward the living room. I hopped like a one-legged kangaroo to the couches and sat down, reading with glazed eyes and shivering hands.

"You are cordially invited to The Terrace Ballroom this evening at 9 o'clock," it read. "By invitation only. Formal dress. No admittance to those who are unable to present an invitation upon request."

Feet thundered into the room. I looked up to find Kuwabara standing at the head of a crowd composed of Yusuke, Kurama, Jin, and, inexplicably, Hiei.

"Well?" Kurama asked.

I swallowed, staring at him, and held out the note. He snatched it up and read it, then passed it to Yusuke, who passed it to Jin, who passed it to Hiei. Hiei stared at it, flipped it over, and then flipped it back again.

"What," he said, exuding distaste from every pore, "is this?"

"It says she's invited to Seishou's party," Kurama said, still looking at me.

"Tonight," I managed to grate out. "Holy crap."

"It's the same as our invitations," Yusuke said, taking it back from Hiei and studying it. "Guess you really are invited."

"I can't go," I said, and everyone looked at me like I was nuts. "Dude, I'd be the biggest freaking liability ever. I can't fight, and you said you were going to fight this guy, and I can't even run away if things get dicey. So no, I can't go."

"You're going," Kurama said, tone leaving no room for negotiation.

I negotiated anyway. "No, I'm not. Bad idea."

"Dani, listen, you have to go," Kuwabara said. "As far as we know, Ryu and Seishou have no idea that you're with us. If you don't go they might catch on."

"Yeah, and you're supposed to be buddying up to Ryu," Yusuke said. "You gotta go. This could be the best time to get on his good side."

"I know," I wheedled. "I know, but… it just seems too risky."

"What seems risky?"

Startled, I looked past the boys to the door of my bedroom. Botan stood there in her blue pajamas, looking sleepy with her hair floating loose and long around her, and I realized just how beautiful she was with a pang of jealousy that I quickly squashed. Jin looked at her for only a moment before staring at the ceiling, nose turning red.

"Dani got invited to the party," Yusuke explained.

Botan's sleepiness vanished. "What?" she screeched, jerking the note away from Yusuke. "Give me that!" Her eyes devoured it in one hungry glance. "I must inform Lord Koenma right away!"

"Wait!" said Kurama, and Botan stopped walking toward our balcony doors. "Dani must go to the party. Other than that discrepancy, our plans for tonight will not change." He turned to the rest of the boys, taking the role of leader. "Jin, to your post, now. And Botan, you can go tell Koenma of what's, but he cannot, under any circumstances, come here on his own. It's too dangerous as it is, let alone with this new variable."

Botan nodded. "I understand," she said, and threw open the glass doors. Curtains billowed around her, gauzy white ghosts that covered her body as she summoned her oar. Her hand crackled with a hollow sphere of golden lightning for a second, and then the strands of light stretched until they formed a vague outline of the oar. The object popped into being a second later, and she sat on it sidesaddle without pomp. Her toes brushed the floor.

"I'll be back as quick as I can with news," she said, expression more serious than I had ever seen it, and her hair flew out behind her like a curtain of silk when she zipped away and out of sight.

The invitation fluttered to the floor behind her; she had dropped it at the last second.

"Aye, well, I'll be a-goin' next," said Jin, stepping forward. He scooped the invitation off the ground and handed it to Kuwabara. "You all be careful, ya hear? I don't wanna see no funerals."

"You sure you're OK with just sittin' around?" Yusuke asked, showing more worry than he ever had, and Jin slugged him in the shoulder. I quickly remembered their warrior's connection.

"I'll be fine," said the windmaster. "Though ya do owe me one the next time the action decides to go n' leave me outta things, yeah? Ya take care now, Kurama, Hiei, Kuwabara. And Dani—" He hesitated, eyes on me.

I shook my head. "You know me. I'll get through."

He beamed. "Aye, that ya will," he said, and he grinned at the others. "And you all take good care o' her, ya hear?"

"We will," they chorused, and Jin walked backwards until he hit the balcony railing. The undulating curtains covered him for a second, and I didn't see him fly away. He was just… gone. But then he zoomed upward, having free-fallen before taking flight, and he hovered in midair outside the balcony. He waved, grinned some more, and shot into the sky. Yusuke ran out and leaned over the rail, head craned skyward, and he let out a low whistle.

"Fast," he said, and he came back to us. The door shut behind him with a clack. "So what now?"

"Jin is guarding the Book," Kurama said, more to himself than to any of us, "Botan is telling Koenma of the new situation, Yukina and Genkai are safely out of sight, and now… now we have to wait. There's nothing more to do."

I felt nervous acid kick up into my throat, making it burn. I didn't like to play the waiting game.

* * *

Taking out the purple dress felt nostalgic.

"I wish Botan were here," I mumbled, pulling the garment over my head. It seemed like years had passed since we went shopping and came home with my clothes together, but the purple dress made of stitched-together silk scarves still fit me like it had in the fitting rooms. I put on a pair of silver sandals (no heel because I can't wear heels, but still strappy enough to be formal) that were mostly covered by the dress, anyway, but I didn't really care as I put on some makeup and twisted my hair into a pretty knot on the top of my head.

"Botan could have done this better," I said, looking at myself in the mirror, and I realized in that moment just how much I missed the bubbly grim reaper. With a scowl I went into the living room, and then I stopped dead in my tracks.

"Lookin' sharp, boys," I said, and when they turned to me I tipped them all a wink.

"Whoa, you look nice!" Kuwabara told me, and I smiled.

"Hey, ya'll are in tuxes. That's pretty special."

Each wore a black suit with a bow-tie, though Hiei was holding his in his hand like a venomous snake. I'd never seen any of them look so good, especially Yusuke: he really wore the suit well, looking very much like a gentleman.

He didn't seem to think so. "I hate this," he snapped, tugging at his tie. He stood in the kitchen, pacing back and forth. "Man, I hate suits. Mom made me wear one to a wedding once. I never thought I'd have to do it again."

"Aw, quit whining," said Kuwabara from the couch. He looked dapper; the suit really did a wonder on his image.

"It's only one evening," said Kurama. He looked good, too, but when did he not? Still, the red rose in his lapel went quite well with his hair and eyes.

"One evening too many," Hiei snarled. He, unlike the others, didn't seem fitted for the suit at all, but the colors and cut made him look less feral and more human than any of his other outfits.

Kurama went to him and plucked the tie out of Hiei's hands, but when he tried to loop it around the fire demon's neck he was rebuffed by a set of flashing teeth. Hiei had actually tried to take a bite out of him.

"Put it in your pocket if you won't wear it," Kurama said, sighing. "You may need it to get into the party."

"Stupid humans with their stupid customs," said Hiei. "I'll sneak in past their idiot guards."

"I'm sure you will, but keep the tie handy just in case," said Kurama, and Hiei stuffed it in his pocket with a scowl.

Kuwabara pushed up his sleeve and looked at his watch. "Uh-oh, guys. It's almost 'go time'."

"You know what to do?" Yusuke asked me, standing up so he could bounce on his heels in anticipation.

I rolled my eyes. "We only went over this a hundred times."

"Repeat it once more," said Kurama. He waved his hand toward the door; all the boys grouped around it, and I trailed close at their heels.

"Follow in about half an hour, keep in sight of one of you guys at all times, do not approach," I said, sighing. "Pretty dang simple if you ask me."

"And the 'get out of town' signal?" Kuwabara said, opening the door so the others could file out into the hall.

This part made me smile. "One of you will punch someone, then detonate a spirit bomb to clear the room." I reached into the bust of my dress and pulled out my own bomb. Pill-shaped and clear, it would explode with a flash of light and a burst of disorienting sound on impact with a hard surface. Botan had given them to Yusuke back when they first booked the hotel rooms; now they were a part of our escape plan, should we need one. "I'll whack someone with my cane, yell, and do the same." I took the door from Kuwabara and leaned on it, holding it ajar with my weight.

"I guess that makes us ready to rumble," Yusuke said.

"Yeah," I agreed. "Now get going. Oh, and good luck and all that, though I'm sure we'll be fine."

"Of course," said Kurama. Hiei grunted in the hallway, looking at me without expression, and then he turned on his heel and stalked toward the elevator. The others followed, bidding me goodbye with waves and smirks, and soon enough I found myself letting the door fall shut.

For the time being, I was alone.

* * *

The lobby buzzed with talk, although I wouldn't say that the huge room was crowded. No, not by a long shot. It's just that the wealthy, I've found, tend to speak in voices loud enough to wake the dead. Maybe they think it makes them sound more important, like one of those birds who puffs their feathers up to scare away predators. I don't know. They certainly seemed to be showing off with all their gem-spattered clothing and jewel-wrought hair. I do know is that no one appeared to notice me, little ol' underdressed Dani, standing at the edges of the crowd. I wandered amongst all the well-dressed socialites without much of a goal, but I kept an eye out for Ryu or the detectives and saw, unfortunately, neither.

_Now where exactly is this Terrace place? _I found myself wondering as I walked across the marble lobby floor. I was about to man up and ask someone (who would look at me down their nose if I had to bet) when I passed the doors to the garden in which I had first met Ryu; they were open wide, and when the warm air from the outside hit me, I stopped.

"The Terrace welcomes you," a sign proclaimed in elegant calligraphy. It seemed to indicate the garden as a destination, so I squared my shoulders and went outside, preparing to lose myself in the maze of hedges and flowers.

No such thing, however, transpired. The paths were all lined with strings of lights and beautiful lamps, and some bushes had been lit up from the inside like paper lanterns. Flowers glowed like gems beneath the stars. I caught my breath in wonder before noticing that parts of the cobblestone path had been covered with carpet the color of spilled wine. Dresses and shiny shoes paraded over the cloth in droves, meandering along it and deeper into the flowering labyrinth.

"Follow the red carpet road?" I muttered, stepping forward. "Aw, what the hell? It still fits the rhythm. Why not?"

The 'road' took me past flowerbeds and straight through the breadflower cove where I had first met Ryu. Many people chose to wind the aromatic flowers into their hair or clothes, but I found the smell suffocating and I hurried out of there. That cove had been especially lit up, the sheer volume of lights making the space glow like daytime.

_I've had enough of those flowers, thanks,_ I thought as I continued on my way. Soon enough I left the cloying scent behind, and not long after I found myself standing on the edge of something I had never seen before.

The building stood at the top of many stairs; made of glass, it seemed to shine from within with golden light, and music drifted out the open doors. I felt like I was looking at a fallen star, one which hadn't lost its gleam, and I froze, staring at it until a couple dressed in formal wear pushed past me with a snigger. I'm pretty sure I heard the phrase 'country bumpkin' as they ascended the steps to what appeared to be paradise.

"Yeah, well, I don't like you either," I said in English, and I began to climb.

The way up was exhausting. I'm not sure how I made it. All I know is that my hair was mostly undone by the time I reached the doormen clad in crisp uniforms and whipped my invitation out of my cleavage. They waved me in without any sign of skepticism (even given my ragged appearance) and I made a beeline for the huge buffet on the other side of the hall. I didn't do much looking around, choosing instead to grab a startled waiter by the elbow. Lucky for me, he didn't drop his tray of delicious-looking drinks.

"Is that," I wheezed, "alcoholic?"

He mutely shook his head, eyes scanning me. I panted out a 'thank you' as I snatched up a glass and downed the contents in a single gulp, and he quickly handed me another cup. Very well-trained. Once hydrated, I said: "You're an angel. Know where a girl can sit quietly for a few minutes?" I rapped my cane on the ground. "Gotta rest this leg, you understand."

He looked down at the cane and gaped at it. "There are seats over there," he managed to get out, and I winked before flouncing off as best as my leg would allow. A seat felt wonderful, but I didn't revel in the feeling of relaxation. Instead, I did what any good spy would do: I catalogued my exits.

All the walls save one were made of glass (wiped spotlessly clean, I noticed), as was the ceiling. The floor had been made of white marble with pink flecks, and somehow the chandeliers (which appeared to float, god knows how) were made of gilt gold. The one wall that wasn't glass had huge golden doors leading to a place I could not fathom, and all the walls except the one with the doors had golden chairs with white cushions pressed up against them in straight rows. Opposite the doors stood a raised area with a grand piano on it (also white), and the only doors in the entire place were the ones I came in and the mystery gold ones at the back. Ferns in huge decorative pots stood in the giant room's corners and in other nooks and crannies.

_I guess I could always knock out a wall if I needed a quick escape_, I thought, _or I could hide in one of the pots,_ and I stood up. On reflex I headed for the piano, and when I got to the raised platform I stood and stared. _Really nice,_ I thought, looking at it. _I mean, that's a great instrument._

"You're the pianist?"

I was startled out of reverie by an official-looking man in a nice suit. His finely combed grey mustache dominated most of his face.

"Um," I said, and he waved a hand at me.

"Well, get up there," he said gruffly. "Your agency already called to say you would be late, but I didn't think it would be _this _late."

I opened my mouth to protest, to tell him I was a guest and not some hired player. He shushed me before I got out the first syllable.

"Since I can't trust you to be on time I guess I can't trust you to have read your assignment. Play something light and classy, but not pretentious. We wanna make the guests feel good but we don't wanna overthrow their conversation. A pretty backdrop, that's all I'm asking." He finally picked up on my flabbergasted expression. "You _can _play, can't you?"

The response came automatically. "Of course I can," said my musician's pride.

The man would have beamed had he been capable of such a feat. Instead, he just nodded and said "Then why the hell aren't you doing it?" before marching off.

I floundered in the wake of his order, unsure of what to do, but then I realized several guests who had heard our little exchange were watching me, expectant and no doubt ready to pass judgment on the crippled and irresponsible little piano player.

_Too much attention,_ I thought, and I tried to feel but was blocked by a wall of bristling formal attire. The faces atop the attire were in no mood for flighty musicians; they'd rat me out in a minute and probably ignore all my pleas for sympathy. Recognizing myself as a lost cause, I sighed when one of them mimed playing the keys at me, and I started to go for the platform's steps.

"Stupid misunderstandings," I grumbled as I battled with the stairs. I tripped on the last one and managed to catch myself on the piano. The crowd-a good sized one-that had gathered to watch me work tittered, so I straightened my back and tried to look as proud as they did. My butt hit the bench with a plop and I opened the grand piano, playing a few scales to warm up. The instrument was perfectly in-tune, notes flying light and free.

As soon as the first peal of music hit them, the people started to disperse. Obviously their interest in someone as lowly as the pianist only lasted until the pianist behaved the way they wanted it to. Still, I was glad to see them turn their collective scrutiny on someone else, because drawing too much attention to Dani, the already noticeable cripple, could jeopardize whatever the hell it was the detectives were up to. Speaking of which…

Realizing that the piano platform was a good vantage point, I scanned the room to look for my friends. They did not appear to be there, but I didn't really mind as I tapped away at the keys. It wasn't like I could approach them even if we did find one another.

Minutes of friendless playing ticked by, but I didn't abandon the piano right away, oh no, because I could see the mustached man who had ordered me to play buzzing around the edges of the room.

_One toe out of line and he'll fillet me,_ I thought as I wound through the more chill portions of "I've Got Rhythm," and as I resigned myself to a new life as a party pianist I realized something wonderful, strange, and scary.

No one was noticing me. They just milled past without a single glance my way.

To test this theory, I made faces. No reaction from anyone, not even when I pulled my upped lips inside my nostrils and snorted them right back out. It was like they could see right through my body and out the other side.

_What, am I invisible?_ I thought as three women in fine clothes ignored the faces I was making directly at them. They sat down in the chairs behind my platform, obviously looking for a private place to talk, and with a start I realized that the acoustics were such that I could hear every last word they said. What's even better is that they didn't so much as glance at me to see if I could overhear. I could tell that in the eyes of these women, someone of my standing held no more interest or intelligence than a lamp or a chair.

_No_ _wonder servants in wealthy houses know so much_, I thought, listening to them chatter about everything that was expensively inconsequential, from clothes to money to cars to vacation homes to gossip. _They make being a creeper that much more easy._ I tried to tune the ladies out, but then I heard one of them say a name that caught my interest.

The one that said it was short, rather plump, and dressed in pale purple. Her dark hair quivered atop her head like a bunch of nervous butterflies; her eyes held all the light that a person steeped in champagne can muster, which was, apparently, a lot.

"Enough of all that," she piped midway through another's story of an African Safari. "You've heard, haven't you? You've heard who the Lord Seishou is bringing?"

"The Lord is bringing someone?" said the second. She, unlike the first, was tall and willowy, but her face had a longness to it that made me reminisce of horses. She wore dark yellow.

"What, you _haven't_ heard?" said Plump-Purple, jowls jiggling as she put a hand to her pert mouth.

"Neither have I," said the last. This one was the most attractive of the three, with full breasts and a pleasant face. Her voice was likewise pleasant; within a moment I knew that she was probably the least stupid of them all, and probably the kindest, too. She wore green that brought out her eyes. "Don't put on airs. This whole thing has been very hush-hush and you know it."

Purple-Plump turned red. "Well, my husband, as you know, is very well connected to the Lord and his closest followers. Tonight's gala is in honor of Lord Seishou's newest and most valuable recruit." Her eyes narrowed, and she smiled. "You mean your husband wasn't told?"

"If he was, he had the sense not to go against the Lord's orders and tell me," said Pleasant. She glanced at Yellow-Pony-Face as Purple-Plump turned scarlet(er?). "Had you heard?"

"Rumors," said Yellow. Her large teeth showed between her lips when she spoke. "A new recruit to be announced tonight, one that has already proven himself to Lord Seishou, though I know not how... I didn't hear a name, nor that he was so distinguished."

"Oh, he is!" said Purple. She practically radiated triumph (or was that just the sheen of her sweat?). "He's so distinguished, in fact, that I'd heard of him _before_ he was recruited by Seishou!"

The other two, for all their apparent dislike of Purple-Plump, seemed impressed.

"Will he be able to help us meet our goal?" asked Yellow, excited. "All the others have failed. Those meddlers from the Spirit World—"

_Why hello there, gorgeous_, I thought.

"—have taken out the last three that tried to steal…_ It_!" She hissed the last word and the others went very still and quiet. My playing paused mid-chord before I remembered to be invisible. "Do you think this new recruit has tried already?"

"The Lord will tell us if he deems it wise," said Pleasant, wrapping her arms around herself as if she were cold. "I hope this new one is worth the trouble. I'm tired of backing fruitless attempts. We need to succeed, and quickly. The world can't take this much longer."

The others nodded, the light of hope making them appear, for an instant, beautiful. But then that light faded, like it always does, and I was left wondering at their words.

"So what is his name?" asked Pony.

Purple appeared smug. "Oh, he's famous. In fact, he even has one of those intimidating little nicknames the most famous of all the warrior-psychics get."

_Psychics? Wait, what do these pampered little bitches know about psychics?_

"I read up on him," Purple continued. "He started out as a medium, but now he can do just about anything."

_Wait. Medium? _My memory ran rampant and pulled up a memory of Koenma, of his words to me in the hospital-that-wasn't. '_A powerful medium stole the Book,'_ he had said.

But wasn't that medium Seishou? These women were acting like someone else was responsible for the Book's disappearance.

"He can make these daggers that rip the very fabric of space and time; he'll be able to steal _It _in no time with one of them, I'm sure."

_Dagger? Now why is that ringing a bell or three?_

"And besides, what jail can hold him when he can be anywhere? And he can astrally project himself, too, and still manage his spirit energy on the other side!"

_Now _that_ I've definitely heard before—the medium who stole the Book can do all of that! _

Purple seemed like she would burst. "If you ask me, there's no way we can lose with the Subtle Dragon on our side."

I froze, playing dwindling away into nothing.

The Subtle… Dragon?

'_Subtle,' that's 'seichi' in Japanese_, I thought frantically, _and 'dragon,' 'dragon' is pronounced_…

Seichi no… Ryu?

"Well," said Pleasant, and she stood up. "Let's mingle before the festivities really get underway. I tire of this." She walked off, shivering, and Yellow dashed after her. Then Purple glanced, at long last, at me.

I was thinking, thinking hard, replaying all the words Koenma had ever spoken in my presence so long ago, back when things were simple in the hospital-that-wasn't.

"_Twenty years ago," _he had said when he first explained everything that was to define my life from that point forth, _"a tome of spells called The Book of Beasts was stolen from the vaults of the Spirit World. It went missing and was recovered by my team of detectives."_ And then, later, he had said: _"A band of demons and humans stole the book originally, and they were led by a human medium who projected their ghost into the Spirit World and stole it straight out of the vault. They tried to recover it once it was placed in Genkai's temple."_

_"What was the medium's name?"_ I had asked.

_"I can't remember,"_ Koenma had said, looking me dead in the eyes.

_Which means… I _assumed_ he meant… _

_Seishou._

"I'm such a fool," I said out loud. "I am such a fucking fool."

"What are you staring at?" Purple asked me crossly.

"Your face," I blurted, and I stood. Her enraged sputter didn't register as I scanned the crowd, looking for a familiar face, and that's when I caught that telltale flash of garnet red.

"Wait, you bitch—" cried Purple, stumbling after me as I bolted off the dais as quickly as I could, and I wheeled on her.

"Don't fuck with me tonight, lady," I hissed, teeth bared, and she paled before falling backwards into her abandoned chair. I left her, then, turning on my heel with all the force of a hurricane. I needed to go find Kurama.

Seishou wasn't the one we needed to be worrying about.

Ryu held all the power here.

* * *

_NOTE:_

_It's a tweest (twist)! OH THE HUMANITY. Everything you thought you knew… WAS A FALSE ASSUMPTION! Because Dani isn't very smart. Oh ho ho!_

_The Boys… in tuxes… (*nosebleed*)_

_So no one appeared to have noticed that Dani has no last name, or at least that it's gone unmentioned. (I forgot about giving her one. Whoops.) It's just never come up. So if you think up a name and pitch it to me, I might just use it. Sound cool? It certainly does to me! I put some choices I made up in a poll. Maybe I should pit the winning choice against your own creations? That might be kind... neat. =D I love polls._

_I'm hoping that maybe Kurama's conversation with Dani shed some light on his weird behavior from last chapter._

_I'd also like to apologize for the rampant run of typos in the last few chapters. I don't have spellcheck of any kind on my computer (damn computer) but I run the chapters through an online one and they usually catch some stuff. However, when I mistype the word "lamb" as "lamp," it doesn't catch it. I reread the chapters before I post them, but I still miss a bunch (looking at your own work for extended periods of time makes you get used to its faults; anyone who's written a term paper knows that all too well). _

_Other than that, I don't have much to say besides I LOVE MY READERS! Really, I do. You guys are so helpful and nice; you tell me when I'm being stupid without hurting my feelings! Yay! And here you darlings are: dumbrat, WickedLovelyDream, chocolateluvr13, LadyoftheGags, DoilyRox, Kaiya's Watergarden, Kai-Chan94, Koryu Elric, ShadowFireFox13, crossyourteez, Dyani91, 0nfateswings, colbub, Reclun, ilovemusicrox12, Turtle Kid, rain chant, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Heart's Icy Touch, Foxgirl Ray, heve-chan, Yaoi-Beloved, Mindchild, Wolf-Cry-Night, Crescent Venus, and xXLoveEachDayXx! _

* * *

_A (LONG) (OPTIONAL) NOTE ON PAIRINGS: _

_Here are my thoughts._

_One thing a reviewer of mine noticed is that I have had very few "moments" (read: encounters that could end up being romantic in nature) between Dani and the Present Koenma. None, actually. Keep that in mind._

_I don't think Ryu is a pairing candidate anymore. Before I wrote this chapter I thought he would be, but now… He and Dani would fight too much over certain ideals. Also, hardly anybody likes him. He's too fanatical (and creepy because of it). I love him as a character, but not as Dani's boyfriend-person-thing. _

_Jin is also out, I think, because when I put that Botan moment in I found that I liked the idea so much that I had to start planning a little side-fic. WHAT. UP. So, sorry Jin fans (which includes myself), but there will be few JinxDani moments from here on out. There will, however, be a JinxOC fic in the near future, because Jin needs his time to shine. I love him too much to just abandon him! Still, GIANT SAD-FACE. He was the least-liked canon character according to the polls, too._

_Kurama… is weird. I'm not liking the thought of him and Dani together as much as I used to, partly because I'm writing a KuramaxOC fic with a character that fits him better than Dani does, and now that I've seen that couple I can't go back to anything that's less perfect than it is. He and Hiei are tied for top place in the pairing poll, though._

_Hiei, like it or not, is very much in the running, mainly because he and Dani have had the fewest moments of incompatibility and they're both short (ha!). Sure he cut her up, broke her nose, crushed her bad foot, probed her mind, subjected her to mental anguish… but they seem to work pretty well, all of that aside. He's also the most popular among you lot as far as I can tell._

_However, as much as Hiei works, I love Future Koenma. A lot. So I have a version of the ending in mind that's rather… well, I can't talk about it or even tell you if I'm gonna use it. But as the next chapters happen, we'll see how the dynamics change. _

_In the end, I think it's between Koenma and Hiei, for the most part, because Kurama didn't get good reception in the last chapter (my fault, but still, it's true). How's that for weird?_


	29. Chapter 29: It's A Metaphor, Fool

Future Talk

Chapter 29:

"It's A Metaphor, Fool"

* * *

Kurama wove in and out of the crowd, as slippery as an eel but at least easier to spot than one, and it took me three agonizing minutes to catch up to him at the buffet table. He was facing the food, studying it for whatever reason, and when I grabbed him by the shoulder he snatched a bay leaf off the mozzarella tray and brandished it in my face like a weapon.

_Plants, deadly, Kurama, right,_ I thought through my haze of panic, and he lowered the leaf when he recognized my face.

"Dani?" he hissed, taking me by the shoulders. "Dani, you're not supposed to approach me!"

I opened my mouth to tell him everything but all that came out was a wheeze. Frowning, he turned to grab a glass of punch off of the buffet table. I downed it in three gulps that I almost choked on. I was lucky he didn't pick up anything with alcohol. This was not the moment to get drunk.

"You gotta find the guys," I sputtered, shoving the glass back into his hands. "You gotta regroup, Kurama, you have to—"

"Slow down," he said, not liking the rising sense of urgency any more than I did. "What's happened?"

"I overheard some people talking," I said, reigning in my erratic breath. "All these people, they're followers of Seishou."

Green eyes opened wide, then narrowed. His shoulders tensed and his fingers tightened around the bay leaf. "What did you hear?" he asked, voice low and deadly and definitely not one I wanted to hear in reference to myself.

"Everyone here is trying to meet the same goal using the Book," I said, summarizing as best I could. "They didn't say what their goal is, but they did say that Seishou is introducing a new recruit tonight, some psychic called the 'Seishi no Ryu'." When Kurama looked alarmed and horrified at once I said: "Yeah, I did the same thing when I heard."

"Ryu," he said, perhaps unnecessarily. "I knew we couldn't trust him. What else?"

"You know that knife Hogosha used to get away?" I said.

"Genkai told me about it, yes."

"Ryu probably made it. Oh, and Ryu's the guy who stole the Book in the first place, not Seishou." Kurama started to protest. I didn't let him. "Listen, I know it sounds far-fetched and I know I probably misheard everything, but we can argue about it later!"

Kurama, for all the arguments I could see rising in his eyes, just nodded. "I'll find the others," he said. "Wait here."

He turned around, took a step, and paused.

"Be careful, Dani-san," he said quietly, and I barely saw him vanish into the crowd.

Waiting did not feel good right then, so I did the one thing I could easily do in that situation: I turned around to begin a systematic mutilation of the buffet table. However, when the rush of food-smells hit me in the face—caviar, fruit, olives, meat, sugar—I detected a scent that nearly made me sick.

"I can't handle bread right now!" I moaned, staring at the food as my stomach churned. That infernal baking-bread smell radiated from _somewhere_ in a relentless waves, but when I scanned the food I didn't see the source. There was no bread to be found: some pastries, yes, but nothing to account for the yeasty warmth of the breadflowers…

"Well shit," I said, confused, and someone tapped me on the shoulder. I spun, giddy that my friends had arrived so soon, and then my smile broke.

"Excuse me," said the small man in the tux. He wore thick glasses and had graying hair, a likeable grandfather figure. "Excuse me, may I get past you? The mozzarella looks delicious."

"Sure," I said, feeling like getting away from the food would be the best option for me at that point, and I took a step to my right. He moved past with a smile, and the wave of scent that followed after almost made me gag.

"Are you feeling well, young lady?" he asked when he saw my face go pale. I clenched my hand over my mouth so I wouldn't vomit and shook my head. Concern made his features ripple. He set down his plate, took me by the elbow (the one connected to the hand on my face; he seemed to notice and accommodate for the cane arm) and gently guided me to a chair behind the buffet with whispers of: "There there, young lady, let's get you a seat."

"Thank you," I whispered as he knelt before me, staring into my wild eyes. But I could still smell that stupid flower and it was still making me sick, and _where_ was it coming from, dammit, and—

I pointed at the nice man's lapel, where a sprig of breadflower lay as innocently as a lamb.

"This?" he asked, surprised.

"Allergic," I mumbled, and with an 'oh' he removed the flower and set it next to a plate of figs.

"I'm sorry," he said with real compassion in his dark brown eyes. "You must suffer so much at Lord Seishou's meetings. A pity. You know what happens to those unmarked."

I looked at him sharply, but he was scanning my dress and my hair with a frown. Just what was he getting at?

"I see," he said. "You can't wear the mark since you're allergic to it."

'_The mark'? Does he mean those flowers?_

"But where is your insignia, in that case?"

"I… left it at home," I said, playing along, and even though he nodded I could tell he was having trouble believing me. "It's my first time here."

"I knew I didn't recognize you!" he said, suspicions vanishing. "You're in for a treat. It's your first meeting and you're getting to see our true savior brought to light at last."

I tried to smile and failed, not knowing what the hell he was talking about, but he didn't notice.

"Yes, he's our true savior considering what he's done for us. A pity his father can't see him today." The old gentleman raised his right hand so I could see the ring on his pinky finger. "We are a tight-knit family here. If I let you borrow my insignia for the evening, will you promise to return it? I can wear the flowers." His smile made his eyes crinkle. "I remember my first meeting. I received this very ring from our group's founder. You should feel honored to wear it. Here." He removed the ring, took the hand not clamped over my mouth, and slipped it onto my ring finger. "Such small hands, but… you play instruments, don't you? I can tell."

I nodded, eyes glued to the flowers on the table, at the familiar image engraved on the gold ring's circular face, at the guests who all wore sprigs of breadflower in their lapels. I remembered the people twining the flowers into their hair in the garden.

_The mark… you must suffer so much… insignia… _

"I'm going to be sick," I told him, and I stood. He backed a few feet away, worried for my health and the cleanliness of his tuxedo (not that I blame him).

"Do you need assistance?"

I shook my head, speaking through clenched teeth. "You have been so kind to me already. May I have your name?"

"It's Hiruma," he said.

"I will return your ring as soon as possible, Hiruma-san," I told him, and I bowed before running off with my hand pressed to my lips.

"Feel better, young lady!" he called, and I felt bad for deceiving such a sweet old man because as soon as I crossed the ballroom and went outside, I let my façade of sickness drop. With all the speed I could muster I ran down the steps and into the garden, searching with my eyes and nose for the breadflower cove.

The detectives, every last one of them, was about as conspicuous as a sheep in a den of wolves without one of those flowers in their hand.

* * *

I probably should have waited for the boys to arrive before running off. We could have all gone together to get them some flowers; we could have had strength in numbers and then maybe things would have turned out differently. But I didn't wait, oh no, I just vanished into the garden so I could save this mission with a bundle of stupid posies.

No one was in the breadflower garden when I got there, but all the lights were still on. I attacked the nearest bush in a frenzy, ripping down bunches of little flowers until I had four good-sized sprigs.

"Hiei and Yusuke won't like wearing flowers," I said, giggling in almost-hysterics, and I turned to leave. The ring on my finger felt cold; I snuck a glance at it. It was an ornate piece: a silver band, a gold-rimmed face with a silver center, six small diamonds ringing the inside edge of the gold, and a circular panel of black jade engraved with the breadflower.

If it hadn't been the logo of an evil organization bent on mass murder, I would have thought it was pretty.

I fought my way out of the garden, taking a wrong turn twice and thinking all the while of what would happen if I didn't get my friends camouflaged in time. _You know what happens to those unmarked, _Hiruma had said, and even though I _didn't_ know I felt chilled just thinking about it. I had no way of knowing if Ryu or Seishou had any idea what the detectives looked like, but I wasn't taking chances. In the event that the crooks didn't know, the flowers could give the boys enough secrecy to take Seishou and Ryu into custody without bloodshed, or they could stay unnoticed by the other guests and navigate through the crowd with no need to fight their way through.

I hated to think of the alternative. There were so many (comparative) innocents in that ballroom.

_Yeah, it's safe to say Ryu and Seishou are both pretty evil,_ I thought as I walked. _But the humans in there, they probably don't know about that._

It occurred to me, then, that I had never heard of either Ryu or Seishou doing anything besides stealing the Book, which didn't seem so bad if I ignored my knowledge of the world's end, but I banished all of those thoughts when I saw The Terrace looming large above me. I was about to go to it when the doors at the top of the steps opened, and when I saw who stood there I pulled back into the shadows of a large hibiscus bush.

_He didn't see me,_ I though frantically. _He didn't see me, he didn't—_

"I know you're there, Dani-san," Ryu called. He didn't sound anything like the soft-spoken man I had had dinner with; power radiated in his every syllable. "Come out. Now."

I almost obeyed him. Then I remembered not to. I quickly shoved my flowers into the depths of the hibiscus plant and took off my ring; after a moment's hesitation, I shoved it down my cleavage. It settled in with my crumpled invitation.

I contemplated running for a moment. He would be easy to hide from in the maze.

"I'm faster than you, Dani-san," Ryu called, almost reading my thoughts. "And I know that maze inside and out. I designed it. You can't hide."

Defeated and aware of it, I took a deep breath and stepped into the light. Ryu stood on the top step, looking down his nose at me. He wore a sprig of breadflower in his lapel.

_Remember Dani: you're not with the detectives and you have nothing to hide, _I told myself.

"But why would I want to run, or hide?" I asked innocently. "Good to see you, Ryu, I'm sorry I'm late—"

"Don't pull that crap with me," he said flatly. My grin vanished. "I know you're one of Koenma's."

"I don't know what you're talking about, and yes, before you ask, I'm insulted," I said waspishly.

He took a step down. "So am I. I trusted you."

I stared at him, shoulders squared and cane at the ready. He took another step.

"So what happens now?" I asked.

Another step. "You come with me. We have to talk."

I took a step back. Between on heartbeat and the next he vanished, and between two more he reappeared behind me. My back smacked against his chest. His hands gripped my biceps. My cheeks paled.

He was so _fast_.

"Don't play any games with me. My temper is short," he said in my ear.

"So's mine," I replied, and I slammed the butt of my cane onto his foot. He hissed in pain, grip slackening, and I hopped like mad back toward the maze.

He was in front of me before I knew it, ramming his shoulder into my diaphragm to make me lose my breath. Gasping for air, I tried to scream when he stood up, shoulder still in my stomach, and began to carry me up the stairs. Every step hurt, making breathing even more difficult.

From the sound of music and happy voices I deduced that the party was in full swing, and then a door opened and we were in shadows. We walked a little more; another door opened, then closed. Ryu threw me unceremoniously onto something soft, where I lay sprawled and oxygen-starved for several seconds. A light flickered on.

"So your name is Dani, and you're one of Koenma's spies," Ryu said, sitting next to me on the gold velvet couch. His arm circled around behind me and gripped my shoulder; he had crossed his legs, too, looking relaxed but coiled, ready to strike. "And you know, I've never known anything more than that." He laughed. "I never thought to ask you about yourself. I just assumed what I wanted. A pity. This could have all happened so much sooner."

"Yeah, a real letdown," I admitted, voice harsh from lack of air. I decided not to bullshit him anymore. It would only make him angry. "And I'm not a spy. Never have been."

"I find that hard to believe considering the company you keep," he said, eyebrow raised as he studied my face. His scrutiny made me feel uncomfortable, so I kept my knees pressed tight together and folded my hands in my lap. I kept my back straight, too, and stared at the gold-patterned wall opposite me as if it was something much more interesting than expensive wallpaper.

"Really, I'm not," I said. "Koenma actually thinks I'm some sort of spy for _you_ guys. It's so annoying."

"So you admit you're working for him?"

I shrugged. "We've come to an understanding, but I'm not... his." For some reason, that sentence had been hard to say.

"Whose are you, then?"

I shrugged. His fingers dug into my skin.

"I'm Dani," I said, "just… Dani."

"But if you're not with Koenma and you're not with me, who are you with?" he said, shifting so he could face me. One of his hands wormed into mine, holding it, and the incongruousness of the gesture amidst the current situation made me lose my focus.

"No one," I said sharply, looking at him. He seemed less angry than he did frustrated. "Do you want to hear the story I told Koenma? He didn't believe me and had a mind-reader verify it, and he _still_ doesn't believe me. I don't think you will, either."

"Try me."

"OK, I will." I pulled my hand out of his, intent on telling his just about everything in an outpouring of pen-up frustrations, but I stopped.

"Well, go on!" said Ryu. "What did you tell Koenma?"

"I shouldn't tell you," I said, tongue thick and clumsy around every syllable.

"Oh, because Koenma told you not to?" he sneered. "I thought you were on your own team, Dani. My mistake for thinking you had any sort of backbone."

Temper flared. "You don't even know me," I hissed.

"Don't I?" he said, mocking me. "You're a stupid little girl with no spine and no thoughts of her own, blindly following whoever says they're the right leader like a brainless sheep." He laughed. "Yeah, I think I know you pretty well indeed."

He was goading me. I knew that very well. He wanted me to rise to the bait. I knew this, too, and still my mental acuity snapped in half. It was stupid, rash, hot-headed, and I couldn't help myself. I would regret it in the future, I knew that, but…

Those mocking purple eyes just _got_ to me.

"I'm from a country that was destroyed ten thousand years ago, and on my twentieth birthday I was walking home from the library when I got stabbed to death by a rapist!" I rasped in one rush of breath. I slowly stood up, shaking quietly with rage.

Ryu's triumphant face crumpled.

"I woke up naked in a forest when one of Koenma's people found me and started asking questions I didn't have the answers to, and I'm lost and scared and confused and no one believes me about anything!" I turned toward him, teeth bared.

"Apparently I have some weird demon energy streak that I can't explain," I continued, "and now I'm all involved in some weird doomsday plot to take over the world with a freaking _Book_! It sucks and I hate it and I want to go home, and you're not making things any better." To my horror I felt tears well up—all that stress, the admittance of everything that had happened to me and the feelings I had because of it, had cracked my shell of strength. "In fact, you're only making this mess worse, so get out of my hair and mind your own damn business!"

Ryu stood up. I sat down, hand over my face to hide the tears I could no longer hold back.

"What country?" he whispered.

My hand dropped. "Does it matter?" I snapped, sniffing.

He knelt in front of me and grabbed my shoulders. "What country?"

No answer.

He shook me until my teeth rattled. "_What_ _country_?" he roared.

"America!" I blurted, and he let me go. He stood. He paced. He ran his fingers through his tawny hair.

"Don't tell anyone in this organization that you're an American," he said, mind racing like a stockcar if his raving eyes were any indication. "Shit. _Shit_. If Seishou finds you, then—"

I felt myself go a little numb. "Then what?" I asked, but a part of me didn't want to know.

Ryu stopped pacing and stared, oddly purple eyes showing anger, fear, and… sadness.

"He's interested in America," he said. "He won't tell me why but it's nothing good, I promise you." He spun, the tails of his jacket flying. "I'm not like him, Dani! I want peace and equality and happiness, not death and destruction!"

"But by what means?" I said hotly, standing. "Killing the people who made fun of you for those 'differences' you never told me about?"

"No!" He looked appalled, and then his face darkened. "I want to tell you, Dani. You're like me. I knew you were the minute I saw your leg and _felt_ you." He paused. "Can you promise to keep my secret safe?"

I hesitated, remembering Kurama's words: _"You must learn all there is to learn and keep his trust in your hand. You cannot afford mistakes."_

"_And you must be ready to betray him." _

I had told Kurama I could do it.

Now was the moment to make that promise good.

Still, a part of me didn't want to shatter Ryu's incomprehensible and one-sided bond with me—pity made it hard to keep on task. I asked: "How do you know you can trust me?"

"Because you're like me," he said, with no hesitation and absolute certainty.

The tears still flowing down my cheeks changed their nature. They were no longer for myself. Ryu was their benefactor now.

"I won't tell," I told Ryu, and my voice broke.

He didn't seem to notice. "You're a halfbreed, right?"

I froze.

"No, you're used to denying it," he said dismissively, and he sat next to me on the couch. His arm snaked around my shoulders again, warm and real and far too close. "But I it was true knew from the moment I felt you in that garden. You're part demon. It's unmistakable." He seemed to shine from within, fervor rising. "I'm half of something, too. It drove my father all but mad, and he started the Society because of it."

"Your father was the… founder?"

"Mmm-hmm. The members of the Society are the people at this party." His smile made me shiver. "We're all psychics, or friends of psychics, with powers normal humans could never fathom."

I processed this. _At least I'll have some information to give to the detectives,_ I thought. _My slip-up wasn't entirely for nothing, I guess._

"You too?" I asked, and he nodded. My suspicions were dually confirmed.

"I couldn't control my powers when I was a child," he said. "People called me the devil child, or an abomination. But not any more." He stood his ground, proud of what he was saying. "The Society will turn every human of note—politicians, kings, queens, celebrities—into a psychic with undeniable powers. Then humans will have no choice but to look up to us, to want to be like us and stop persecuting those of our kind." His voice dropped into a whisper. "People hate the ones who are different, Dani. You know that even better than I do, with your leg and your heritage working together. Now you can let your powers out without fear."

"…you're insane."

He froze. I did, too. The words had slipped out on accident. Ryu's jaw clenched.

"Explain?" he said through tight teeth.

I swallowed, nervous, but there wasn't any turning back. I pulled out the only name I knew that could resolve this situation: "Ever heard of Miley Cyrus?"

He looked at me like I was crazy (which I definitely was at that point). "No."

"Oh." That certainly threw a monkey wrench into my speech plan. I'd like to think I recovered gracefully. "Well, do you have any spoiled TV stars in this country?"

"Yes." He did not appear to have predicted my point, so I was blunt about it:

"Imagine the brattiest one of them with the ability to destroy cities or kill people if they don't get their way."

He swallowed, eyes shifting down and to one side.

"Yeah, I think you get my point."

"We're going to be careful," he said in a low voice. "Give only the smallest of powers to those who would abuse them. Give the greatest powers to those in the Society itself, or to people who would use them for good."

I snorted. "Yeah, and you're a good judge of that?"

His hand tightened on my shoulder, dangerous and hard.

"You yourself admitted that Seishou was deranged," I went on, ignoring his silent warning, "and yet you're allies. Yeah, I totally trust you to make good choices. Uh-huh. Sure."

Ryu stood up, stepped in front of me, and knelt. My heart fluttered. Oh, he was handsome all right, and in that traditional 'I'm on one knee and about to propose' pose… well, what girl wouldn't feel a little hot under the collar?

"I couldn't avoid making him my ally," Ryu said, cajoling and melodious. "He had taken over the Society before I managed to get inside it, but I don't plan on humoring him for long. Ruling the Society is my right by birth and by spirit, not his!" He took my hands, pressing his forehead against my palms. "You have to believe me, Dani. I have only the best intentions."

"And the road to hell is paved with those," I said, but he didn't hear. He probably didn't allow himself to.

"I'll protect you from Seishou," he said, head rising so our eyes could meet. "If he finds out that you're from America there's no telling what he'd do to get you, but I won't let that happen. Trust me."

I didn't reply. Only stared.

"I'll protect you," he repeated, hands tightening around my own, and then he stood and turned toward the door. My hands fell coldly to my sides. "But right now, I have somewhere I need to be. You stay here."

"No," I snapped, rising to my feet as my fear did the same. Thoughts of Ryu—who seemed to be getting crazier by the minute—going after the detectives didn't seem like a good idea. "No way. You can't just—"

"I can do anything I damn well want!" he roared, wheeling on me, and he snatched my cane out of his hands and broke it over his knee, wood splintering with a sound like tangled hearts. The pieces fell to my feet with a clatter. Then, as suddenly as it had appeared, his temper fled and was replaced by remorse.

"You'll be safer here," he said, breath shuddering past his lips. I stared at the cane, feeling as lost as a child left alone in a crowded shopping mall. "I'll be back for you soon. Stay quiet."

He left, then. I heard the lock engage a moment after.

* * *

I grieved over that cane until I spotted a decorative bucket of umbrellas in one corner. Still, as I stared down at its ruined form, at the pale wood of the cane's core lying open like a wounded heart, a twinge of every negative emotion a person can feel washed over me. Loss, fear, anger, sorrow, doubt… all of it and more that I'm at a loss to name.

If Ryu and I had ever had the potential to be friends, it was gone now. That broken cane almost seemed like a metaphor for our shattered relationship. Imagine that, right? Totally not cheesy at all. Not like something a fanfic author with a flare for the dramatic would cook up.

Totally not. Never. Nuh-uh.

I bent down to caress that cane one last time. I arranged the splinters to say: SYMBOLISM

"If I'm the butt of some sick joke," I muttered to myself, "my story had better have a damn cool title. Oh, and a well-spelled summary. Christ."

After that little interlude, I did what I was supposed to do and made and EPIC PLAN. However, the EPIC PLAN only went as far as getting out of the room Ryu had locked me in, because I had no idea what to expect after that.

One thing at a time, right? Right.

The room was obviously a dressing room for a bridal party having a wedding or reception on The Terrace—I could tell from all the framed pictures of cakes and happy couples in unmistakable nuptial uniform. There was one big room (where Ryu and I had talked) that contained three couches, a vanity mirror surrounded by makeup lights, and a bolted-and-barred window that lay opposite the door I could not get through (the lock seemed unpickable; I lost all but two of my many hairpins trying). There was also a closet and a door that led to a beautiful bathroom, but nothing in either room promised me an escape.

I listened at the door for stock characters—I mean, dimwitted guards I could somehow trick into opening the door ("Oh no, I've hurt myself and have no intention of bashing you over the head with this umbrella and stealing your keys when you come in to administer medical attention or revel in your cute captive's helplessness; what do you take me for, an unimaginative hussy?") but the hall outside the room was still and silent.

I paced for a bit; that usually helps me think, but nothing happened besides a bit of sweating. I snagged some tissues from the vanity and wiped myself down.

"Am I just nervous or is it really hot in here?" I said crossly, tucking a few more tissues down my top in case I needed them. It was getting crowded in there, I might add—my invitation, the ring, and now a bundle of tissues made me look like I had a budding third boob.

I sat down, fanning myself with my hand.

"No, it really is just hot in here," I said. "Maybe if I walk around I'll stir up a breeze. Yeah. That'll totally work."

And despite my skepticism, it did. I made a circuit around the big room, into the bathroom, and back out again, and when I passed by the door I felt a breeze. The breeze vanished when I moved away from the door, so with a mind for being cool I backtracked.

The breeze returned.

_Now just where did you come from?_ I thought, and I looked up. My eyes bugged out of my head. A laugh bubbled up inside.

"You're an idiot, Ryu," I said. "A true idiot."

You know those little vertically-opening windows people put above doors for ventilation? I think they're called 'transom' windows, and yes, that room just happened to have one. And even luckier for me, this one was open.

It was also four feet above my head.

Looking at it (gosh, it wasn't very big at all, was it?), I squared my shoulders and took a deep breath. "It'll be a tight fit, but if Buzz Lightyear can do it," I said, resolute, "then so can I. To infinity and beyond, yadda yadda yadda, but where's a stinking ladder when you need one?"

I didn't have a ladder, though. What I did have was a chair (a remarkably low one from the vanity) and a bucket out of the closet. I put the bucket on the chair and stood on both, slid the umbrella outside, and hooked its curved handle onto the top of the door beneath the transom. Then I followed it out.

Predictably, I got stuck.

"Dear god I'm useless. For the first time in my life," I said through clenched teeth, wriggling with all my might, "my hips are actually too big for something!" I took a deep breath, blew it out, and tried to push my way free, but nothing would help. I was wedged too tight inside.

"Where's Jenny Craig with her stupid miracle diet when you need her? The only way I'm getting out of this is if I lose five pounds around my middle or drench myself in olive oil, but I'm a little short on the olive—"

I froze.

"Brilliant, Dani. Brilliant." I paused. "But are you up to the challenge?"

The thought of my favorite characters putting their lives on the line scared me enough to believe that yes, I was indeed up to it.

Entering theta state while hanging half upside-down, with a windowsill pressing right into your already abused diaphragm, is hard. Deep breathing exercises are impossible. But Genkai and Hiei had trained me well, and after a few false starts I began to drift.

_Thinner, thinner, thinner,_ I chanted in my head, summoning the image of a more narrow pelvis. _Thinner, thinner, oh god I sound like an anorexic fourteen-year-old get me out of here NOW!_

I opened my eyes. Moved. Twisted. Kicked.

I was still stuck.

"Damn," I growled, and I bit my lip. The bite triggered my wandering memory in just the right way; I smiled. "Let's try this again, shall we?"

I submerged myself in theta, feeling my will wash over my power, and from a great distance I felt the pain of my teeth digging into my lower lip. _Small enough to fit through this gap_, I told myself. _Just small enough to get through._

My eyes opened. I braced my hands on the door below me and jerked.

Was it just me, or did I move a little more than I was used to?

I worked at it for a few seconds, twisting and turning in place, and yes, I was definitely smaller than before. With new hope I writhed, elated and grinning from ear to happy ear, and when I felt my hips pop free I couldn't help but laugh in triumph.

That cry was quickly stifled by the floor rushing up to meet me. I put my hands out just in time to save my face from getting smacked, but I still fell into a dazed heap until I could gather my rattled wits and sit up.

"Well," I said in amazement, "I guess I'm not a totally useless fangirl, after all." I stood, using the door for support, and I unhooked my makeshift cane from the ledge above me. Intent on getting moving, I took one step and staggered against the wall.

My thighs, you see, were anchored immovably in place.

"So making my hips this small without making my thighs smaller, too, impedes my mobility," I said, trying to keep calm in the face of not knowing what was wrong with my own body, dammit. "Oh. I see. I need to keep my joints proportional. That makes sense."  
I bit my lip again, releasing my hips. _Normal, normal, norma_l, I thought, and when I took another step they seemed just fine. I breathed a sigh of relief, then looked around myself.

I was in a long hall lined with other doors that led, conceivably, to other rooms like the one I had just vacated. But I remembered that Ryu only opened one door between the ballroom and the door to the dressing room, so I assumed that one of the doors before me led straight to The Terrace. Not knowing how else to go about it, I started opening doors.

Most, however, proved to be locked. I started listening at the keyholes instead, but until I traveled quite a ways down the hall I heard nothing. Then the sound of music (piano, of course—soft classical piano played with the flair of a jazz musician) drifted toward me, and I knew I was on the right path, especially when I found the door—smaller than all the others, oddly—that radiated music and chatting voices like a fog.

I sighed, again with relief. Ryu hadn't started any mayhem yet, it seemed.

I put my hand on the door's gold knob. "Gotta find the guys and warn them," I said to myself, steeling my nerves for conflict, and I walked out that door with all the severity of a priest.

* * *

The door, as it turns out, wasn't much of a door at all—not to those in the ballroom, at least. It had been made to blend in with the back wall so perfectly that not even I could tell where it had been once it was closed. The seam was so small as to be almost invisible. The gigantic potted fern that had been placed in front of the door didn't help visibility much, either. It did, however, afford me a nice hiding spot, and once I got through that secret door I had no idea how to get back.

So the fern, in the end, was a good thing, especially considering what happened next.

I got there just in time to see the lights dim. Everyone fell quiet. The music stopped as I peeked out from behind the fern's pot (it was taller than I am), and with mounting trepidation I saw a man climb the piano's platform all the way on the other side of the ballroom._ It's a stage now, I suppose, _I thought. _Great. Let's just hope this little drama has a happy ending._

Meanwhile, Seishou had tuned to face his followers.

"Friends," he boomed. I had never heard—and I never will hear again—a voice like that one. It was as if someone had learned the language of mountains or thunderclouds, lightning or avalanches, tsunamis or earthquakes of untold magnitude. With one word he stole the breath from my throat and stilled the room completely.

"Friends," he repeated through the veil of a cold metal mask. Its features had been frozen in a perpetual smile of good grace. "I bring to you tonight a man who will change our lives forever."

No one moved. I stood rooted to the spot, petrified with fear and awe. Seishou's cloak moved about him in an unseen wind; his night-black hair radiated around his head like a static halo.

"He has already helped us once. Months ago he used the powers many of you dream of possessing to do the one thing we desired most." He raised a hand and clenched it into a fist before the eye sockets of his mask. "He tricked a guide of the Spirit World into granting him entry to its halls, and then he took… _It_."

People gasped. I think that's what Seishou meant for them to do.

His breath hissed over the syllables, rainwater sluicing over ice. "But he is more than just our friend, our ally, our knight." Arms—arms with hands clad in metal gloves, tipped with golden claws and bronze detail—swept out wide. "He is our _prince_!"

A cheer went up, one I almost joined in on. Sieshou's words ignited the fire of joy within me; I could not help but get swept away. How could anyone resist a voice like that?

But Seishou's voice cut through the wild cry like magma. "He is _Ryu_," he screamed. "_Ryu_, son of Yoshio, the founder of our Society and the man whose ambition unites us all! _Ryu_: heir to the vision that will calm the world and bring it peace! _Ryu_: a leader and a guiding light in these times of darkness, bearer of the Book that will make our presence known! Welcome him; welcome our new brother;_ welcome the Subtle Dragon!"_

Seishou's arms dropped, and he stepped aside. The spell—the one that had kept me from moving or thinking or breathing while he spoke—broke as people screamed in joy and rapture.

I have never heard cheers that genuine. I have never seen faces so jubilant. I have never seen four men stand out so much in a crowd.

I was, you see, able to look for my friends for the first time since Seishou spoke, and finding them was a simple task. My detectives stood in the middle of the Society, lacking both the flowers and the faces that could have showed that they belonged, and their joyless expressions were about as obvious as a wolf in a nursery.

But I, the only one of their side that knew the consequences of such expressions, stood at the back of the room, unable to reach them.

I looked around, desperate for anything that could help the situation, and that's when I saw Ryu standing on the dais next to the silent Seishou, arms raised as he faced the exultant crowd, but his eyes weren't looking at his followers. He was staring straight at the boys, who had no idea what was about to hit them.

"Thank you, my friends," Ryu said when the cheers died down. His voice seemed weak after Seishou's. "My father, Yoshio-san… his name means 'righteous man.'" He paused, letting that sink in. Despite not having Seishou's voice, I could already tell he was a skilled orator. "He was named well. He had a dream—"

I immediately pictured Martin Luther King Jr. dressed as Seishou. Not good.

"—to do away with the prejudices of mankind, to lift righteousness up and put false judgment down." A smile. "Psychics, he often said, were the next step in human evolution." He paused again, swallowing. "He said so… because of me."

The crowd waited with bated breath as the speech picked up in intensity. "My father loved me, but no one else did. They called me a freak, a devil, a demon, but I am none of those. I am human. I love, I hate, I dream, all as a human being. I am simply… different. But not any more."

"Because we have the Book!" someone in the crowd yelled, and people cheered. But Ryu's morose expression made them quiet with uncertainty.

"We _did_ have it," he intoned, solemn. "I stole it myself, felt it breathe within my spirit's hands when I used my soul to infiltrate the vaults of that wretched place. But when I reached the Human World and began to look for my abandoned body, the Book resisted. It loves to feed on the energy of the Human World, and it would not enter spirit from again." He stopped talking, looking like his heart would burst from regret. The next words seemed hard for him to say. "That's when the Spirit World's dogs appeared."

"They stole what's ours!" called a voice.

"Yes," said others, and Ryu nodded in agreement.

"But all was not lost!" he said, raising his hands over his head. "We have two things to celebrate, brethren! Consider them gifts from myself—" he put a hand over his heart and held the other one out to the crowd "—to you."

"Ryu!" someone shouted. "Ryu, Ryu!" A chant started up, but Ryu quieted it with a gesture. His voice seemed so much more hypnotic since the memory of Seishou's had faded.

"The first gift," he said, "is the reclamation of the Book! A team of our most trusted and powerful friends is heading its way to Its side right now."

Cheers; ecstatic cheers.

"And our other gift to you…" His eyes locked onto the detectives.

My body ached with tension, but there was nothing I could do. Tears pricked my eyes like needles. Nails cut into my palms.

"My other gift," Ryu said with relish, "is the men responsible for the Book's first loss. Look, my family, and see the unmarked! I present to you the humans Urameshi Yusuke and Kuwabara Kazuma, and the demons Hiei and Kurama!"

As one the crowd turned on them, backing away from the detectives until they stood exposed, back-to-back in a tightly defensive pod. I saw Hiei's snarl and Kurama's cold glare before Yusuke spoke. He was as brash as always, never showing fear in the face of almost certain death.

"Hey!" he said, pointing. "Hey, mask-man!"

Seishou pointed at himself, expression unreadable through the mask.

"Yeah, you! We're taking you in!"

"I think not," said Ryu, and he reached into his pocket. From it he pulled two small knives, and with his other hand he pinched a bloom off of the breadflower sprig in his lapel. He placed the blossom on his tongue, closed his eyes, and knelt. Then he put a knife in both hands and shoved them into the floor.

I didn't expect anything to happen. They were only knives, after all, and they couldn't stand up to the hard stage's surface. However, the incident with Hogosha was out of my mind at the time, and I quickly recalled it when the knives cut neat circles in the stage. But in those circles was not ruined wood or stone, just darkness so complete it looked like the end of the world, and when the darkness rippled and grew and formed four towering figures of night and dreams… I took a step back in fear, shrinking into the shadows of the giant fern.

The figures soon coalesced into more recognizable forms. Pointed ears, long muzzles, four legs, tails, and lots and lots of teeth… they seemed more dog-like than anything, and with a howl that made my ears vibrate the four of them jumped off the stage and onto the floor, sniffing their way to the detectives (they were probably blind, I decided, since their noses were doing all the work and they didn't have visible eyes). The Society members backed away, murmuring in appreciation. The beasts' nails clicked across the tile.

You know those "Turn off you cellphone!" things they play before movies? I really wish they had those in front of dire situations in _real_ life, you know?

Because just then, Ryu's cellphone rang.

The dogs paused and looked over their shoulders at their master. The boys lowered their weapons (Hiei look especially pissed). Ryu's face went red and he pulled a phone out of his pocket. It all would have been funny had I not been so close to having a heart attack.

"What?" he growled, and then: "WHAT?" He wheeled on Seishou. "They relocated It. We need to regroup."

"Ha!" said Yusuke. "Gotcha! Did you really think we'd be stupid enough to just leave it at the temple? THE JOKES ON _YOU_, IDIOT!"

"Get them!" Ryu snarled to the dogs, "but keep them alive. I'll need information out of them."

I took a step forward as the dogs did the same, but before I could shout a word of warning or jump in or… or… _something_, the things had pounced. I couldn't really see the fight because the crowd surged in too close, but at that moment I didn't really need to be looking after the boys. They could take care of themselves, and I was in enough hot water of my own. I felt eyes on me, making me shiver, and with dawning dread I looked up at the stage.

Ryu had spotted me.

"And when you're done with them," he thundered, eyes flashing violent violet, "round up all of the unmarked and _bring them to me_."

I barely heard his last few words. By then, I was already out the door.

* * *

_NOTE: _

_I didn't mean for there to be so many lighthearted moments in this chapter, but I think I subconsciously wanted them to break up all the seriousness. Did they make you smile, at the very least?_

_And what the heck does Seishou want with America?_

_I 3 Hiruma. Anyone know who I named him after? A drawing of his ring is on my deviantART account._

_Also, the fic should move pretty quickly from now on. We know (most) of the stakes. Haven't seen 'em all, though… MWA HA HA!_

_Also, names! The winner of my poll was "Danielle Elaine Thompson," but several of you had great suggestions. Now I have a poll up that pits my winner with your suggested names. Vote now! All names have the creators alongside them ^_^ Thanks to: Zetsubel (Danielle Brianna Fitzgerald), Lady of the Gags (Danielle Nesbitt), and Foxgirl Ray (who said that Dani's name should have to do with music, which prompted me to make "Danielle Integra Treble", odd middle name and all. I actually really like this name—'treble' sounds an awful lot like 'trouble,' lol). I'm also putting "Danielle Grace McGillicutty" back up because it makes me laugh. =P (Did I miss anyone's name? It's not too late to put it up!)_

_And thank you my lovely reviewers! I am constantly amazed by your kind words. They make me as happy as an appropriate simile! Kaiya's Watergarden, ilovemusicrox12, Koryu Elric, Robyn the Perpetually 15, chocolateluvr13, dumbrat, WickedLovelyDream, RedbudInTheSky, LadyoftheGags, ShadowFireFox13, Turtle Kid, DoilyRox, colbub, Heart's Icy Touch, crossyourteez, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, AkaMizu-chan, j.d.y., Reclun, Zetsubel, 0nfateswings, the Under-Cover Fangirl, Foxgirl Ray, Shadow of Sound, Masuyo Shun, HeeHeeHee01, Miyakomono, rainchant, heve-chan, Ry171819, Yaoi-Beloved, oceanabyss, and WingThief!_


	30. Chapter 30: Into the Dark

Future Talk

Chapter 30:

"I Will Follow You Into The Dark"

* * *

The garden enveloped me like a cloud, all warm, wet greens and bursting flowers. I hardly noticed. I was too busy fleeing for my life to realize just how pretty the place was.

Well, I say 'fleeing,' but in reality I just walked away at a slow gambol, because I wasn't alone when I left. As it turns out, many of the Society members didn't want to get too close to Ryu's shadow-dogs, and so when I left via The Terrace's back doors I found myself in the company of two dozen or so well-dressed partygoers. None of them appeared overly alarmed, just giddy with excitement and chattering about Ryu's big reveal and subsequent display of prowess (not to mention more than one choice word about the detectives, mainly concerning how it was a pity to kill such handsome boys, but progress was progress, darling, oh ho ho!).

At first, when I neared the door in a haze of fear and panic and found myself mired in the jewel-encrusted crowd, I struggled. I tried to push past people to get outside, but even then I found myself caught on the stairs by both the unrelenting mass of people and my own handicap. Then I realized just how obvious the struggling me (a lame duck if there ever was one) looked amid a gaggle of such stately geese, and I stopped.

There's no better camouflage than a bunch of oblivious rich people, was my thought process, and I willingly let them escort me into the garden. I quietly (and unobtrusively) wormed my way to the edge of the crowd, and as we passed near the breadflower cove I detached from their number and slipped into the shadows of an arbor.

They had been heading back to the hotel. Doubtless, Ryu would have people waiting for me there.

And besides, it's not like I could _do_ anything at the hotel. I didn't even have a key to our room.

I had never felt so alone in my life.

Once sufficiently shadowed, I reached into the top of my dress and pulled out Hiruma's ring; I slipped it on my finger, shuddering at the feel of the cold metal. Still, I was glad of the old man's kindness, and after a few deep breaths I made my way into the breadflower cove.

It wasn't lit up any more; all the lights had been dimmed, but the flowers still seemed to glow as they swayed beneath the moonless sky. I would have commented on the beauty of the dark scene had I not been so distracted.

"Shit," I muttered, and I threaded my fingers into my long hair. The pins had long since fallen out somewhere. "Shit, guys, I can't do this. I can't do this alone! What the hell am I supposed to _do_?"

I didn't get an answer. I hadn't really been expecting one.

Then again...

I wasn't thinking too clearly when I walked up to the nearest breadflower bush and pushed my way into it. I wriggled and turned, burrowing a few feet into the plant, feeling its branches score my bare arms and chest with its sharp leaves. To my surprise, it was hardly a bush at all—more like a collection of thick vines that wound together to form a defined, yet pliable, structure that could be shaped and trellised at a gardener's leisure. Therefore, it was surprisingly easy to carve out a small cup of space for myself amid its scented leaves. I turned to lean into its vegetative embrace, then lowered myself to the ground. My hair caught on the leaves, but I barely felt a few strands rip free as I sat cross-legged on a pillow of leaves and flowers and dirt. Vines flowed like water over my bowl, hiding me from view, and I took a deep breath and tried to clear my head. Flowers tickled the back of my neck like breath. The umbrella's fabric crackled beneath my palms as I twisted it, leaning my forehead against its folds, biting my lip in frustration and fear, trying not to move too much or feel the way my good foot had started to tingle and throb...

The empty whiteness of theta drove out the dark, and I was inside my mind. Alone, I tried not to let the crushing silence overtake me, and I whispered a name across the void.

I'm not too sure what happened then. Somewhere, deep inside my mind, something just... snapped.

I had an answer.

An image wavered into life before me, translucent but undeniably there, and when I saw his liquid brown eyes and ragged hair I couldn't help but embrace him. For the first time in a long time we weren't in the place-that-wasn't, but somewhere in my control.

"I need help," I said, the arms of my spirit wrapped around his waist so tight my shoulders ached. We floated in nothing; he was me only anchor.

"Dani?" Koenma asked, looking down at me in confusion. "Is that... you?"

"What does it look like?" I snapped, pushing away. He was no Beast, that much I knew, but was he just a figment of my imagination?

He squinted, eyes crinkling. "I can't see you. I can hear, but I can't... see." He paused, looking around. "Is this a dream?"

_Not a figment, then—I'm not creative enough to have a figment that dreams,_ I thought even as I said: "Ha! That's my line! Welcome to my world!"

"I was at my desk, watching..." His cheeks colored. "Well, watching _you_. The footage of you in your home world, I mean. It... gives me strength while I... wait, for _them_ to come for me."

It felt like I had swallowed a lump of iced lead. How was I supposed to react to the knowledge that Koenma was just waiting for his death, totally alone, hopeless, doomed. I mumbled: "Oh."

We stood there in awkward silence, neither knowing quite what to make of this new development, and I struggled for a way to move on.

"I just... wanted some advice," I said, and that's when I remembered why I was there. "Good God, theta really makes me a space case!"

"Aren't you always a space case?"

I slugged him in the arm. Since he couldn't see me, the force of the punch made him stagger just a bit. It was a funny sight considering there was no ground.

"How are you contacting me, Dani?" Koenma said, rubbing his arm with a hurt look. "Usually I'm the one who contacts you. If you could do this before now, why didn't you?" His eyes narrowed. "Or maybe you're not really Dani at all. My defenses... are they cracked, Beast?"

I punched him again, but harder. He grunted, intensely murderous look vanishing from his light eyes.

"I. Am. Not. A. Beast," I said, kicking or punching him with each word. I wasn't too strong, however—not even in theta where my spirit's leg was whole—so when he stumbled I could tell it was simply because he didn't know how to anticipate my attacks.

"All right, I believe you!" he said, and his hands snaked out and somehow managed to grab my invisible wrists. He looked as surprised as I felt. "Just tell me how you're doing this."

That made me pause. I wasn't too sure myself.

"I entered theta state," I said slowly, "and then I just... said your name. The rest just... happened."

His lips pursed. "I was watching... well, you know... and maybe I fell asleep at one point, or..."

"If it's any consolation, I was so panicked when I called you that—" I stopped. "Shit! Space-case! Quit distracting me!"

"I'm not—"

"I need to know everything I can about Ryu and Seishou."

Koenma looked at me blankly; then he seemed perplexed. "Who?" he said, and I wanted to murder him.

"The medium who summoned the Beasts," I said from between clenched teeth.

"Oh. Well." He paused. "I can't tell you anything."

My jaw dropped open. A few disjointed syllables fell out of my mouth but none of them were terribly coherent.

"Things have... changed, Dani," he said, and on reflex I pulled my arms out of his grasp. Koenma looked confused and a little lost, unable to see me and wondering if I was there because of it. "You've... changed things."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means I can't tell you anything." His hands hung loose at his sides. "I want too—really, I do—but I just can't. Our timelines are so different now. There was none of this hotel business, no Society, no nothing."

"What do you mean?"

"We got the Book from them and they tried to steal it back," Koenma explained. "The Beasts were summoned in the fray. Your presence has taken things outside of my control."

"So you're saying I screwed everything up?" My pulse, unlike it normally did, seemed to slow down into nothing.

"Of course not," he said, lips tightening. "Never that. I had no idea things would change this drastically. It's not your fault."

My knees would have buckled had I been standing instead of floating. "So you can't tell me anything?" I said, feeling my last line of aid trickle away between my fingers like loose sand.

He hesitated a long time before saying: "No."

"Then... what do I do?" On impulse I reached out and took his hand. "I can't do this alone, Koenma. I just can't."

He blindly pulled me to him; even in my dream-world he smelled like dust and char, and I could feel his chin resting on my hair. I couldn't help but lean into him, and his touch—his warmth and strength and support—girded me like nothing else could have.

"I don't know, Dani," he said, sounding pained. "I'm not going to be much help from here on out."

"I don't care," I said into his chest, arms snaking up behind his back. "Just talking to you helps."

He chuckled. "I'm glad."

"And you know what else? I'm going to save you if it kills me. You're the only sane person I've met so far and I'm not holding out much hope for the others to come around."

Another chuckle. "Can I tell you something?"

"Depends. Is it about my weight?"

"The opposite... kind of. I just wanted to tell you how odd it feels to hold someone who's invisible." His arms tightened around me. "It feels like a dream."

"Or a nightmare," I murmured, and I pushed away from him. I looked up into his face, wanting him to meet my eyes, but he couldn't. He tried, though, and the effort made me smile.

Then I was pitched back into his embrace.

"Dani, what—" he said, shocked as we tumbled down, and I bit my own tongue as I felt something push me, really _push_ me, in the legs like a miniature freight train. I found myself kneeling over Koenma with a giant weight pressing onto my body, and Koenma's confused and frightened eyes bored up into my own. For a moment I knew that he was seeing me, really seeing me, and then the weight pressed ever harder onto my back and neck and I almost collapsed atop Koenma.

But I pushed back against it, a cry escaping my mouth like a cannon shot, and Koenma said "Dani, what's happening?" as I tried to shove the force off of me.

"Something's... on my _real_ body!" I gasped, and his fingers tangled into my tumbling hair. I felt the pain of it, clear and sharp, score my consciousness like bullets, and my control of theta state started to slip.

"Don't go!" he said, desperate but I shook my head even as I felt myself surge back into myself.

"Gotta get back!" I said, and I pushed the weight away with all my might. For a brief second I was free-floating above Koenma's form, and then darkness rushed in to claim him.

* * *

I 'woke up' to find the source of the weight staring me in the face.

One of Ryu's shadow-dogs, you see, had found my secluded little nook and placed its two dinner-plate front paws atop my folded legs.

Somehow, the thing had managed to avoid putting pressure on my bum leg, but the awkwardness of the position it had trapped me in was excruciating (you try putting weights on your calves while sitting Indian-style—it's not fun). The dog didn't weigh very much despite his intimidating size, but the baseball-sized nose he had shoved into my chest breathed enough force to blow my hair out of my face and into the bushes behind me. On reflex I grabbed my umbrella in both hands and used it to shove that hateful face away, but the shadow-dog just pressed forward with a growl like thunder.

Fear unlike any I had felt before made a tear slip from the corner of my eye, and with a sob I couldn't control I watched a huge tongue snake out of the creature's lips. It wrapped around the umbrella and yanked it out of my hands with a jerk, then put a huge paw on my shoulder and _shoved_ me, actually shoved me! My hand flew up on reflex, trying to bat the creature away, but it caught my mouth in its icy teeth and—

_Oh god, my hand, it has my hand—_

—and it froze.

I did too, feeling its teeth prick my skin like so many needles, not knowing what to do as something wet and slimy coated my fingers like a sopping glove, glubbing against my skin and bubbling around it, fluid and solid at once...

It spat out my hand, hopped off of me, and trotted away.

I sat up, vines tugging at my skin and hair, and watched it go. My hand dripped liquid onto my dress as I cradled it to my chest, watching the dog flow in the moonlight. Its body shimmered, and through the leaves of the plant around me I saw two more dogs in the clearing. They seemed to watch me, each other, everything... and then they galloped away without a sound.

I looked down at my slime-coated hand.

On it, Hiruma's ring glittered.

* * *

I climbed out of my hollow once I stopped sniffling and regained my composure, but even then my knees shook as I stood, using my umbrella more heavily than I had before.

"Thank you, Hiruma," I said to myself, looking at the swaying branches of the breadflower plants and the way the stars boiled above in the black sky. I walked into the courtyard, feet slicking over the cobblestone, and I intended to find a bench and sit there for a few minutes. To calm down and stuff, you know?

That was no to be, however, because the world hates me.

As I took a few deep breaths and wiped the dog's saliva off of my hand, I heard the unmistakable sound of voices. The garden had been rather quiet up until then, and my gut reaction to the voices was to shrink back into the shadows of a nearby arbor. The small structure stood at the edge of the breadflower garden, giving me a pretty good view of the entire space even as it was off the beaten path and therefore a good spot to wait and see what was going on.

But then I realized that the voices were coming fast in my direction, and even that little arbor didn't seem so secluded anymore. My adrenaline started pumping (fight or flight instincts, etc.) and before I could figure out what to do I saw a troop of familiar faces come into view around a bush.

I spotted Seishou first, partially because he was leading the way but mostly because he was just so commanding a presence. His metal mask, wild hair, and billowing cloak cut through the air like dark lightning, and it took all the willpower I had to pull my gaze away from him and to the people trailing in his wake.

First after Seishou came Ryu, tuxedo looking more rumpled than it earlier had, and he had his hands shoved into his pockets. I couldn't see his expression very well in the dark, but he seemed tense regardless. After Ryu came a troop of people I didn't recognize, for the most part—but one of them happened to be Hiruma, who looked pale and wilted around the edges of his kind face. Stumbling after the lot of them was a pod of people I recognized without question, and the sight of them alive and whole made me let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

The detectives were safe.

They didn't look too happy, though, nor very awake. All of them had their hands bound tight behind their backs and could barely seem to keep their feet underneath their bodies; each had a man standing behind them to prod them along and prevent them from falling into the nearest bush. But nevertheless I was so happy to see them that I nearly missed it when Ryu said: "It's in here."

One of the ones I didn't recognize said: "And we won't be discovered?"

"Correct," said Ryu, and he approached the largest and most densely packed of the breadflower plants. It was nearly twenty feet wide at its thickest point and it compromised a full half of the breadflower cove's circular wall.

Ryu plunged his arm into the plants up to the elbow, then shoved plants to the side like a green curtain. Before I knew it a door had appeared in the plants (a la 'The Secret Garden'), a door which Ryu opened for the others. The gentlemen in the tuxes surged into the darkness within and disappeared, and then the guards escorting the detectives shoved their targets in after. I felt my heart sink when I lost sight of them, but I didn't concentrate on that.

Ryu and Seishou were talking.

"Your little distraction is loose," Seishou said in a voice like silver, and I shuddered. He was talking about me; I couldn't help but think so. "I did not think she possessed the intelligence to evade your creatures, but even I am still capable of surprise, it seems."

"She'll turn up," Ryu spat.

"Love is an inconsequential emotion, Ryu," Seishou went on as if he had not heard. "She'll only betray you in the end."

"She won't."

"She will," Seishou said firmly. His mask glimmered as he turned to face the moon. "And unless she can forward our goals I do not think I can stomach your fondness for her."

"You'll kill her," Ryu said, death-quiet with his features in shadow.

"I will," Seishou said pleasantly, and he moved toward the hidden door. "Keep your distance, Ryu. Not unless you want her to get hurt."

Ryu took a step after him, just as Seishou vanished into the dark. "But what if she _can_ forward our goals?" Ryu said, words flying from his mouth like arrows.

A pause. Seishou's voice floated from what felt like nowhere: "What do you know, Ryu?"

_Don't do it, Ryu,_ I thought.

"She said she's from America," Ryu said.

Silence. I felt my heart beat three time, surreal and firm, before darkness itself surged out of the doorway and into the night. It blotted out the stars and rose up, up, until it blocked out my vision and the world.

_"Why didn't you say so?"_ Seishou's voice roared in a feral whisper, and then he was gone, form soaring up into the night sky like a meteor of sin.

Ryu watched him go without batting an eye. Then he turned to the door and vanished.

* * *

Staying out in the open while the dangerous, obsessive, and altogether scary Seishou was (presumably) looking for me did not sound like a good idea—I mean, the man could _fly_, a fact I had neither been aware of nor counting on at the outset of this adventure.

But, as I said earlier, the hotel would be crawling with Ryu's operatives. I couldn't see myself going back there.

So, in my mind, the only place to go was down.

I stood on the threshold of the secret doorway, feeling an air conditioned breeze waft my dirty hair across my shoulders. A long, dimly lit staircase descended into the dark to parts unknown, and after listening for a good five minutes (no one seemed to be down there, at least not near the stairs) I started down into the deep.

_Find, my, friends, _I thought with each halting step._ I, hate, stairs. Find, my, friends. I, am, scared. Find, my, friends._

After a long, long time the stairs terminated in a dark hallway lined with glass. It reflected my dirty, torn dress and equally dirty, torn hair without any sugarcoating, and when I caught a glimpse of my running makeup and wide rabbit's eyes I paused, fingers coating the glass in shadow-dog slime and sweat.

"You can do this, Dani," I told my reflection, and I closed my eyes to better remember Koenma's warmth and support. "He believes in you. Me, I mean. He's counting on... us." I opened my eyes, grimaced, and curled my hair behind my ears. "I sound like a freaking schizo." My reflection stared back at me, blank expression and all, and I shrugged. "Not the worst that could happen."

I continued walking, trying to keep quiet but for the tap-smack-tap of my bum foot and umbrella hitting the floor in turn. The glass hallway went on and on and on, not turning or varying in any way, and when I came upon a large metal door I felt my mouth go dry.

_Please be unlocked, _I thought as I pushed down the handle, and my heart leaped when it opened smoothly beneath my hand. Fresh, harsh light stung my eyes, and I shielded them as I walked into it.

Another hallway stood before me, but this one was immaculately carpeted and wallpapered. Rich red plush on the floor, wooden crown molding, golden walls with brass light fixtures—it seemed like an extension of the actual hotel, but I was in no mood to admire it right then because I heard voices down the hall.

I squared my shoulders. "Here we go," I said quietly, and I used my ears to track the voices down. I passed a door marked 'bathroom' in gold calligraphy on the way, and I peeked around the first corner I came to with more than a little caution. Luckily for me someone had set a huge pot with a decorative fern right on the other side of said corner, and I was able to sidle up against it and peer through the thick leaves to see the hallway beyond.

Two men stood on either side of a closed door—a large one made of dark wood that had been gouged with symbols I did not recognize. The two guards passed a large bottle swaddled in a crinkling paper bag between them, taking pulls from it and grimacing when the liquid hit their throats.

"So how long're we gonna have to stand here?" the one closest to me asked as he took a swig from the bottle. He was short (not much taller than me, as a matter of fact) and he had a messy mop of pale green hair that obscured most of his face from the bridge of his nose up. Two fin-like ears that shimmered like spun gold poked out from under the hair. The sight of him stunned me, making me freeze in place.

That guy was definitely a demon.

_What the hell are _demons_ doing here? _I thought, watching them drink. I caught a flash of pearly fangs when he spoke. _I thought all the Society members were humans!_

"Dunno," said the other. Unlike his friend, he was tall and almost human-looking with wide blue eyes, tanned skin, and a bowl-cut of shining black hair. The furry tail that poked out of the back of his pants and twitched like a snake told me a different story, however, as did the brown claws that tipped all of his fingers. A ring with three keys hung from his belt.

"Seriously, though," said the short one as he stood on tiptoe to peer inside the door. He had a rather high-pitched voice, I noticed. "I'm glad they're chained up. The one with the red eyes is fuckin' creepy looking."

_That'd be Hiei, _I thought with a smirk.

"The sooner Seishou kills 'em all off, the better." Shorty took the bottle back from his friend. "Heh, Spirit World dogs. No match for Seishou, right?"

"Yep."

"Even Kurama got taken in by him, and he's famous for being smart, right?"

"Yep."

"Yeah, we were right to join him. Fuckin' right." He hiccuped, obviously tipsy, and he stared at the bottle in his hand with a wry smile. "Look at us, drinkin' on the job," he said. "We're gonna get busted _bad_ if we get caught."

He tried chugging the drink and failed with a splutter. The tall one took the bottle away.

"Hey, man, can you finish that off so I can throw it away?" said Shorty, wiping his lips on the back of his hand. "There's probably a trashcan in the bathroom."

_Hello, plan-of-the-century,_ I thought as an idea popped into my head.

"Yeah," said Tall as he began to down the rest of the bottle, but by then I was already well on my way to the bathroom I had passed earlier. Inside the first door were two more, one for men and one for women, and I went into the men's room. Within lay a sink with a trashcan beneath it, a urinal, and a stall containing a toilet. Thinking quickly, I took off one of my shoes and hung it on the jacket peg located on the back of the door, and then I went into the stall (luckily it was one of the stalls whose walls stretched from floor to ceiling with no gap at the floor; I wouldn't have to stand on the toilet, thank God) and I pulled the door shut. I was just in time, too, because not two seconds later Shorty walked into the bathroom with uneven steps. I heard the clink of a bottle hitting the bottom of the wastebasket, and then the sink turned on.

Using the sound as cover, I opened the door just a crack and peered out; Shorty was washing his face at the sink, hands disappearing behind his sheet of green hair in an effort to reach his forehead and eyes. Then he straightened and, wobbling a little, turned to leave with his face still dripping. He paused, however, staring hard at the door.

"The hell?" I heard him murmur as he reached out to touch the shoe I had hung on the coat peg, but he didn't quite get there because by then I had already leaped out from my hiding place and whacked him on the back of the head as hard as I possibly could with my umbrella-cane. He went down with an _oomph_ and I popped him again, harder this time for good measure, and that time he passed out. My heart beat like artillery fire in my chest, and I leaned against the wall for support after he stopped moving.

"Please don't wake up," I hissed from between clenched teeth as I pulled my dress off over my head and began to take off the demon's clothes. I very promptly put them on myself. I was lucky that he and I were roughly the same size because his button-up white shirt, shiny shoes, and plain black slacks didn't threaten to fall off of me with every step. That sure would've looked suspicious to his tall friend, although 'ten-second weight-loss' would be a housewife favorite if I could market it right.

Muttering an apology to Botan, I tore the skirt of the dress she'd bought me in half. I used one of the halves to hogtie the guard and then I stuffed the bodice into his mouth like an impromptu sort of gag.

Bending to one knee, I pulled his face up toward me by the hair and stared at him, hard, memorizing his green featured one by one until I could see them as brightly as a star inside me head I felt blessed that his hair covered all but his mouth, and as I bit my lip and drew a little blood in the bargain I concentrated on changing my own hair.

Way back at the temple, during my solitary training in my cramped bedroom, I had figured out how to alter my hair's appearance almost perfectly. The more odd looking the hair was, I learned, the simpler the transformation was, making people like Botan and Kurama easy to emulate.

This being the case, Shorty's hair sprouted like weeks. My brown hair shortened and fell over my eyes in a shower of pale green, and with another, more vicious lip-bite I tried to get my ears to lengthen and shimmer like gold, and the length part was pretty easy (cartilage manipulation wasn't at all hard). But the color... well, I couldn't quite manage that—the ears were more brownish yellow that shimmering gold, but I decided, as I studied my efforts in the bathroom mirror, that it would do.

"The hair alone should be enough to buy me a few seconds," I said, feeling exhausted from all the shifting. I drew in a slow, shaking breath to calm myself, and with a thumb I smeared the blood from my bites down my chin in a sticky red wave. "Better," I said, doing my best to look bedraggled (which was easy all things considered). Then I shook myself, steeling my resolve and putting my tiredness on the backburnerr. "Oh, crap, gotta hurry." With many grunts I pulled the guard into the stall and shut him up inside it, and then I limped out of the bathroom as quickly as I could. When I reached the corner and the potted plant, I picked the cane-umbrella up into my hand and transferred my weight to my right foot.

"What the fuck, man?" I said as I hopped around the corner, mimicking Shorty's voice as best I could. "Somebody had this on the floor in there! I think I sprained my ankle! Bit my fuckin' lip, too!"

The taller man frowned as I hopped over and leaned against the wall, breathing hard in what I hoped looked like pain, but I didn't have to worry—he didn't seem suspicious when he said: "Wait here. I'll go check it out."

"Thanks," I said as he walked away, and as soon as his back was turned I hopped after him and whacked him like a real life pinata. He fell to the floor in a heap. I kicked him in the head a few times for good measure before dragging him off to join his buddy in the bathroom, and I used the last strip of my mangled skirt to hogtie _him_, as well. Stealing the keys off his unconscious body proved easy, as did walking down the hall and putting said keys into the holding cell's huge wooden door.

_Just remember, Dani, _I instructed myself as I turned the key and slowly tugged the door open, _they don't know it's you and they don't know you can shapeshift. Get in, free them, and get out. Simple. Oh, and don't get caught. That last bit's important._

But, of course, it wasn't all peaches and pie.

For starters, they glared at me the minute I walked in. I was not used to that and it made me freeze.

"Back already?" Yusuke asked from the corner. All of the boys had been chained both leg and ankle to the walls. Deep runes etched into the iron supposedly suppressed their spirit energy; otherwise they long since would have broken free.

"Uh," I said, unable to move beneath Yusuke's burning stare. I could hardly see him through the fringe of green bangs hanging into my face; it was like the world was underwater.

"Kicking me around while I'm tied up wasn't enough for you?" Yusuke went on, and he lunged against the chains with a growl. I flinched.

"Don't let the fool excite you, Yusuke," Hiei snarled. He stood with his feet spread apart and braced on the floor, arms slightly above his head. I noticed a cut on his left cheek; his bow tie was gone. "Conserve your strength for when we tear him limb from limb."

Kuwabara appeared to be the least bloodthirsty of the bunch, staring at me through suspicious—but quiet—eyes, so I moved toward him. That's when his eyes went all buggy. "Dude, don't come near me, I didn't do nothin' to you," he said, shying away. His coat was missing and his white shirt ripped in many places. When I bent to try the keys in his ankle cuffs, he lashed out with a kick. "Hey, they're tight enough already, jerk!"

"Shut up and stay still," I hissed, and I let one kick collide with my arm in order to get one of the remaining two keys into the lock. It wasn't the right key, however, and I had to sit through another barrage to try the last one. That one was it, and Kuwabara's right ankle was free. But the resulting kick-fest made it nigh impossible to free the rest of him, so I backed away and looked at everyone else in desperation.

"I'm trying to free you all," I said in the lowest voice I could muster.

"Dude, what the hell is up with this guy? I thought he was working for Seishou," Yusuke muttered.

"There isn't any time to explain," I said, trying not to sound panicked. "Just... hold still."

Yusuke, Kuwabara and Hiei looked ready to eat me alive, so I glanced at Kurama. His eyes were narrowed, calculating, but he didn't appear to have murder on his mind. I approached him with my hands raised in an nonthreatening gesture. I held the key up in one hand and pointed to his bound arm with the other.

He looked up at his arm, then at the key, and then at my face in turn. A slow nod made his hair fall over his shoulder, and I approached him very, very slowly. The key hit the lock with a musical clink, and as the second the manacle fell away I backed up.

I never should have underestimated him, though. Kurama was way too fast.

In a second he had my neck squeezed in the crook of his elbow so hard I saw stars. My vision blurred as I gagged, choking on the air I couldn't get inside me,, and my nose was overridden by the smell of his battle-weary shirt—grass, floor cleaner, and sweat. My hands batted ineffectively at his body, but I kicked and struggled anyway. My umbrella clattered to the floor.

"Who sent you?" he hissed in my ear. Yusuke crowed with triumph in the background.

"S-stop," I gasped, and his gripped lessened enough for me to speak. "No one sent—"

His muscles tightened again, and I choked.

"Y-you're hurting me!" I said, wheezing, and my vision began to fade into black. "K-Kurama!" I moaned, and suddenly I was falling. The tile rushed up to meet my hands as I braced myself against them, but then I collapsed in a heap on the floor. I pressed my cheek to the cool ground and panted for air, and when I was strong enough I looked back up at the fox demon.

His green eyes showed white all the way around the irises. "I know you," he said, disbelief coloring his tone. "Who are you?"

I didn't answer and picked the keys up off the ground. "I'm the person who's gonna get you out of here, if you'll let me," I said, voice hoarse, and after recovering my umbrella I went to Hiei. But then I paused, not wanting to get too close, because something in his eyes—they glittered even more than usual—stopped me cold.

"I know who he is, Kurama," he said.

I paused, key in the lock encircling his left wrist. I felt the lock click open a moment later, and in that moment I knew the charade was up.

"She, rather," Hiei went on, sounding bored as the manacle fell to the floor with a clang.

"What the hell are you talking about, Hiei?" Yusuke snapped.

"I'd know you _anywhere_," Hiei said in a voice low enough for only me to hear. His free arm snaked out and wrapped around my waist. I flinched, but his fingers were gentle as he yanked me toward his body.

"I feel like there's something you haven't told us," he said, breath warm against my ear. "Right, Dani?"

_

* * *

_

NOTES:

_IT'S SHARK WEEK._

_That is all._

_(Kidding! I had part of this chapter written months ago, way back at FT's beginning. I'm so psyched we've come this far! Sorry this was short, though—I had a really busy week/weekend and could only write so much, what with working full-time and all. But this was a nice cliffhanger if I do say so myself (and I do) so... yeah. Cool =D)_

Also, I HAVE A BLOG. Please check it out; I really need feedback. The link is on my profile. Enjoy, and if you're on Blogger let's be friends! =D villainousventing (dot) blogspot (dot) com.

_Thank you for the heaping support, my friends! You guys are phenomenal people and I value your time and energy so much. Sarah Jackson—The Other, dumbrat, Rokkugoh, oceanabyss, Kaiya's Watergarden, colbub, WickedLovelyDream, LadyoftheGags, ilovemusicrox12, Foxgirl Ray, Idk wat my name is, DoilyRox, chocolateluvr13, rain chant, Wolf-Cry-Night, ShadowFireFox13, Kurai-Aiesha, 0nfateswings, j.d.y., Turtle Kid, Kai-Chan94, Masuyo-Shun, Reclun, HeeHeeHee01, AkaMizu-chan, and American Senpai!_


	31. Chapter 31: Little Secrets

Future Talk

Chapter 31:

"Little Secrets"

* * *

I pushed away from Hiei, blind with adrenaline and fear, and staggered back with wide eyes. The key fell to the floor with a clink. He held my gaze as he lifted his free hand, which was suddenly glowing red like a sword in the forge, and grasped the chain on his other wrist. The cuff and chain melted in a shower of molten metal, and then the chains on his legs glowed and broke, too. He raised he right fist into the air, and then Kuwabara yelped.

All the chains fell to the ground, destroyed. More than one pantleg or shirtsleeve was smoldering, but I didn't really care at that point. Hiei didn't seem to notice, either.

I was trapped and, for the life of me, I could not see a way out. Hiei stood in front of me, Kuwabara at my back, and Kurama and Yusuke at my sides. They compromised was a wall of power I could not contend with. My fear of the shadowdog was nothing compared to this.

"How... did you know?" I managed to say, swallowing. Perhaps I should have just played dumb. At the time, though, I could barely force myself to think, much less lie.

Hiei's gaze traveled to the umbrella in my left hand. My fingers tightened on the handle.

"You have a distinctive stride," he said without a touch of irony.

"Wait, wait, what the hell is going on?" Yusuke asked, coming forward from the wreckage of his chains. "This is that loudmouthed guard guy from earlier, Hiei, obviously not Dani—did all that pyromania finally cook your brain?"

"No," said Kuwabara in a hushed voice. I did not turn around to look at him, but everyone else did. My eyes fell closed. "Feel his—her—energy," he said, voice hushed.

A moment passed. Then Yusuke asked: "Is that a costume?"

My hands shook when I pulled back my hair, sweeping it over the crown of my head to reveal my un-shifted face. I was tired of hiding behind it, tired of seeing through a filter of green that was so unlike my own brown hair that it jarred me almost as much as the accusatory stares did.

Hiei, before me, narrowed his eyes, but he did not move otherwise.

"Is that a wig?" Kurama asked in a low voice. He moved to stand by Hiei's side, and when he saw my face he gasped softly. "It's not. I see."

"Wait, what?" Kuwabara said, circling around to join Kurama and Hiei. When he saw the roots of that green hair sprouting from my skull, his jaw dropped open. "Whoa. Where did you get the dye on such short notice?"

One of my elongated ears tickled at the tip, suddenly; something was buzzing around it, and I flinched away. But then Yusuke's fingers darted out to finish what they started and he yanked on the ear's point, hard. It hurt. I whimpered, squeezing my eyes closed as my hands dropped to my sides. Hair fell back into my face.

"These sure are glued on tight," Yusuke said with a frown. He tugged again. "Damn, they even _feel_ real."

"They _are_ real, Yusuke," I heard Kurama say. "As is the hair, I assume."

I was too scared to reply.

"Unlike some, I won't pull on your hair to check, Dani. You have to tell me yourself. Is it real?"

"It's... real," I said, and then I slammed the butt of my umbrella down onto my bad foot. The boys flinched, unsure of what I was doing, and I concentrated on my normal features as the intense, visceral pain made me want to heave. I felt my hair lengthen, tickling my cheeks on the way down, and Yusuke stopped touching my ear. With ragged breath I grabbed a handful of my hair and looked at it—the color and length had been restored—and then I felt my ears. The left was back to normal, although the right one...

"Is this really pointy at the tip?" I asked, pointing at it numbly, and the boys all nodded. I closed my eyes, concentrated, and—

"Did that do it?" I asked, throat feeling thick.

"It's still there," Kuwabara said. He sounded hollow, somehow: voice empty and dazed.

"Oh. Well." I held tightly to my cane, light head and faint spots making my vision dance and blur. I staggered to the side, hand out, and collided with a wall. I leaned my temple on it, relishing the cool black tile's silken sheen. "I'll sort it out later, I guess."

No one spoke.

"You guys should probably get out of here," I said to the floor. My hair—now brown again, and long—obscured the rest of the room. I could not see their faces. "The guards will wake up soon."

I looked up to find them all staring at me.

"Well, go on," I snapped. "Yell at me all you like, then leave. Get it over with."

"Tell us how you did that," Kurama demanded. When I hesitated he said: "Dani. Start talking or we'll leave you behind."

My jaw dropped. "What, you're not going to start accusing me of working for Ryu and Seishou?" I spluttered. "I have this weird ability thing I never told you about, I magically show up in the middle of an enemy stronghold, I—"

"You are not Seishou's, and neither are you Ryu's," Hiei snapped. "We know that. Get over yourself."

I froze.

"Dude, she doesn't even..." Kuwabara muttered, and he gave a deep belly-laughed that made me jump. "Well, isn't this just one big miscommunication!"

"What's... going on?" I said.

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Kuwabara was in the garden looking around when Ryu carried you off. He heard you two... uh... not getting along."

Kuwabara looked quite proud of himself. I had no idea how to react.

"Of course, that did not free you from our suspicions because there was still Seishou as your possible ally to contend with," Kurama added quickly.

"But then when those weird dog things pinned us down and they started chaining us up, Ryu started giving orders to have you captured," Yusuke said. "Seishou pretty much interrogated him about you right there, like he didn't even know you existed, and then he got really mad that Ryu was 'distracted' by a girl that Seishou didn't know how to manipulate, and he..." He trailed off, glancing at Kurama with uncertainty.

"He ordered you to be captured and tortured as a spy," Kurama said calmly. My pulse went glacial. "Not a way to treat a subordinate, I believe."

Kuwabara nodded in agreement. "I mean, Seishou could have been acting, but he... well..."

"He slaughtered one of the Society members in a fit of rage," Hiei said, expressionless.

I know I reacted badly because Kuwabara had to cross the room to hold me up. I had started to collapse, white-faced with cold lips. I could feel my pulse hammering at the roof of my dry mouth.

"It's OK," Kuwabara said soothingly. "We won't let him get to you."

I hid my face behind my hair. "Why are you being so nice to me?" I mumbled.

"We're not," Hiei snapped. I looked up at him; his lips had curled back over his teeth in a snarl. "We're keeping you nearby because you're hiding things, not because any of us likes you. Get that through your head right now."

His apparent viciousness made me recoil, but then I stopped. There was something there, something else in his unfathomable expression that didn't scare me at all, and my gut told me that he did not mean me harm. The threat of it was there, of course, but only grudgingly. I wondered vaguely what that meant.

"What Hiei means," Kurama said, shooting Hiei a warning look, "is that while you have been freed from some of our suspicions, you have only implicated yourself in new ones." His eyes lingered on my malformed ear. "Frankly speaking, you are a loose canon with no discernible motives or alliances, and that is even more dangerous than an alliance with Seishou because we cannot predict your moves."

Kuwabara put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed. I don't know if he meant to reassure me, or remind me that he had me in his power.

"However, if you are willing to cooperate with us as we leave this place and tell us everything you've so far left unsaid," Kurama said, eyes hard, "then I am sure we will be able to resolve everything in good time." He offered me a small smile that hovered on the border between malevolence and grace.

Yusuke grunted in ascension, but added: "But now's _not_ that time."

I swallowed, nodded, and pushed away from Kuwabara in the same way I managed to put my panic and misgivings aside. "I managed to tie up the guys guarding you with my dress," I said. "Stole these clothes, too."

"How did you manage that?" Kuwabara asked, surprised.

I brandished the cane. "They were drunk. It wasn't hard. But they'll probably wake up soon so we should get going." I paused. "What's the plan?"

Everyone looked to Kurama, the resident strategist. His lips pursed before he spoke.

"First, we need to get out of here," he said. Everyone nodded in agreement. "Then we need to capture Seishou or Ryu. Hopefully alive."

"We need Ryu," I said, and everyone looked at me. "Seishou... well, he left. He's also a it more worrisome than Ryu and Ryu has good information." That promptly reminded me of what had transpired in the garden and I let out a stream of English curses. "Shit, this is bad, but we need to move. I'll talk and walk, so let's go."

The five of us left the room, and I locked the door in our wake ("It will buy us some time," Kurama claimed). Since no one else knew the way out I led them back the way I had come, through the brightly lit area and toward the hallway lined with dim mirrors. As we went, I spoke.

"Ryu told me a bit about what he and Seishou are up to when he locked me up earlier," I explained, syllables coinciding with my uneven steps. "I think he wants to use the Book to turn everyone of consequence into a psychic,so they'll stop being persecuted and start being respected instead. That's what the whole Society thing is all about. Ryu's father started it when Ryu's powers manifested as a kid."

"And where does Seishou come into this?" Yusuke asked, opening the door to the mirrored hall. It fell shut behind us with a clang.

"Getting there," I grunted. "Seishou's the current leader of the Society, and he joined it before Ryu got to be old enough. Ryu's the one who stole the Book out of Spirit World; Seishou asked him to do it. But then Ryu told me that Seishou seems to have typically evil-bad-guy goals that no one else in the Society shares. Everyone else just wants equality for psychics; I think all these people are innocent, more or less."

"We'll be the judge of that," said Kurama. By then we had reached the multitude of stairs leading to the garden, and without a word Kuwabara motioned for me to climb onto his back. I clambered up, teeth clattering with every step we took.

"An-y-way," I said, trying not to bite my own tongue, "Ryu doesn't know what Seishou's trying to do on his own, but he's using Society money to do it." I'm ashamed to admit that I hesitated before saying: "He _was_ able to tell me that Seishou is really interested in America, though."

Everyone came to a stop.

"Why does that feel like more than just a coincidence?" Yusuke said, voice dry.

"Are you sure it was America, Dani?" Kurama asked, looking grim.

"Yeah. Ryu told me not to ever tell Seishou that I'm from America. That would be bad, apparently."

Kuwabara turned his head to the side so he could face me; my eyes were on level with his mouth. "How did Ryu know you were from America?" he asked, rightfully confused, and I felt myself blush.

"I... might have let it slip," I admitted. "But that's in the past... right?"

Everyone looked about ready to kill me, but finally Kurama said: "We'll discuss it later. That's a promise."

I chuckled nervously, grimaced, and looked away. We started walking again.

"Well, at any rate," I said thickly, "we don't have to worry about Seishou finding out from one of us."

"We don't?" Yusuke asked.

"Nope. Ryu told him himself."

We stopped walking again. A chorus of "WHAT?"s made me flinch.

"These steps lead to the garden," I said, trying not to sound nervous as I buried my face in the shoulder of Kuwabara's jacket. "I was hiding in the bushes when Ryu took you down here. He and Seishou stopped to chat, and Seishou kept saying how he was going to kill me for interfering, and..." Tears pricked my eyes, suddenly. "And I think Ryu thought that he could protect me if he made me seem useful to Seishou, so he told him about me being from America. I'm sorry, guys."

"Hey, don't cry," Kuwabara said. "It's not like it's your fault that Ryu opened his big mouth like that."

"We'll also discuss whose fault this is later," Kurama snapped, taking the lead as we trailed after him. "Dani, earlier you said that Seishou left. What did you mean?"

"He went away to go looking for me after Ryu told him where I'm from," I said as we reached the door to the outside. "Oh, and Seishou can fly. He looks like a giant bat."

"Well that's just great," Yusuke said as he kicked the door down. Vines surged into our faces as we went outside.

"The good news is that he probably doesn't want to kill me anymore," I said as we stepped into humid night air. Breadflowers made my nose feel sticky. "Just capture and torture me or something."

Hiei snorted. "Death may well be the preferable option."

"Thanks," I said, sarcasm making my words caustic. I wriggled; Kuwabara sensed that I wanted to stand on my own, so he let me down. We were in the middle of the breadflower cove, ragged and bruised but not too worse for wear, and I asked: "What now?"

"Now we find Ryu," said Kurama.

"And avoid Seishou," added Yusuke.

"Getting out of here alive might be nice, too," said Kuwabara helpfully, and he and I grinned at one another with an edge of hysteria throat I could feel as much as I could see.

Hiei had closed his eyes, face pointed toward the stars overhead. "The dogs have vanished," he said, and a tissue-thin layer of tension seemed to leave our group. "Ryu is... he's on the Terrace." The corners of his eyes wrinkled. "He's angry. I think out little ruse with the Book worked."

Kurama and Yusuke nodded and started out of the cove, but I shared none of their confidence as I felt sweat break out between my shoulder blades.

"You all right?" Kuwabara asked in a low voice. Neither he nor I moved to follow.

I looked up into his concerned brown eyes with a twist of my lips. "Scared," I said. "Do we... have to go? The see Ryu, I mean?"

His brow furrowed, and he leaned down so we were more on level with one another. "We gotta figure this out, Dani," he said, and he clapped a hand onto my head to ruffle my hair. "As soon as we take care of him we'll take care of you, and then this will all be over. It'll work out; trust me."

I smiled at him. He smiled back. As his hand left my hair, a voice snapped: "Are you two quite finished?"

We both looked at Hiei in shock. I hadn't noticed him standing there, listening to every last word we'd said as if he had that right. Neither, apparently, had Kuwabara.

"Don't scare me like that, shrimp," Kuwabara snapped, and he waved a dismissive hand at Hiei. "Go on, follow them. I'll hand back with Dani."

"You don't have to do that," I said hastily, but Kuwabara only smiled.

The smile faded, however, at Hiei's next words: "You can't take on one of the shadowdogs by yourself, oaf. I'll babysit the girl."

My temper rose. "Don't strain yourself if the task isn't up to your standards, Hiei."

"And I can _so_ take on one of those dogs!" added Kuwabara. His fists clenched at his side as a vein pulsed in his neck. Even in this world Hiei could get to him, it seemed.

Hiei scoffed, eyes shutting for a second. "Says the first man to fall to one of them." His eyes opened, but there was no humor in them—there wasn't even any mockery. "Go on, Kuwabara. I'll... _watch_ Dani."

To my intense gratitude, Kuwabara looked at me for permission before running after Kurama and Yusuke. I nodded at him, smiled, and he patted my shoulder one last time before leaving.

Leaving me to Hiei's mercy, that is.

I turned to the fire apparition gingerly, but I did not meet his eyes when I said: "Well. Let's move, I guess."

He stepped toward me, boots hissing across the cobbles, and I took a step away. My eyes landed on the trail Kuwabara had taken, and I meant to go to it.

A hand on my wrist stopped me.

"What?" I asked, sounding cross as Hiei trapped my wrist in his left hand. I turned halfway toward him, looking only at his dark fingers on my pale skin, and I tried to ignore the way my heart jumped into my mouth.

"Tell me how you do that," he said.

I finally looked at his face; his eyes seemed black beneath the moonless sky, but they still glimmered as bright as a star. "Do what?" I asked.

"Change," was his simple reply, and I didn't say anything. "Don't play dumb."

"I'm not."

"Then tell me how you do it."

I shrugged. "I enter theta and concentrate on an image."

He regarded me without emotion. His unblinking eyes made my playing-it-cool facade waver.

"I can't do it unless I'm in pain," I relented at last.

"So your lip...?" he said, voice like silk as his eyes lingered on the dried river of blood on my chin. Something in his tone told me he was fishing for something... but what?

I decided to do a little fishing of my own. "What about it?" I asked, intentionally vague.

His hand clenched on my arm. "Did you do it to yourself?" he growled, not liking my evasion.

I yanked my arm away. "Does it matter?" I said, smiling like a displeased schoolteacher, and I turned to walk away. I took approximately three steps before Hiei appeared like a phantom in front of me.

"It might," he said, and he took a step toward me. We were nose to nose. I backed up. He moved forward.

"Well, for your information," I said, gaze not wavering from his own, "I don't remember how I got it. Tonight's been pretty busy, you see." We stared at one another until the silence became too much to bare. "Move, please?"

"Did Ryu give it to you?" he asked, and he transferred his look to my mouth. It took him a moment, but his next words came from between clenched teeth. "Those are tooth marks beneath the blood."

My heart beat a little faster. "So?"

His reply was blunt and dangerous: "So did Ryu give them to you?" he asked, and he stepped even closer.

I had to look away, face reorienting to somewhere in the vicinity of my left shoulder.

"If you're asking if he kissed me or something," I spat, embarrassed and mad at once, "stop."

"Why should I?"

My hand came up and landed on Hiei's chest with smack; I shoved with all my might, and he took a grudging step back. I could tell my strength had little to do with it.

"Back," I said, "off. Now."

The response was a simple one. "No."

"Yes. Now."

"If he hurt you," Hiei snarled, anger breaking over his face like a tidal wave, "I will kill him. I promise you that."

"He broke my cane, not me!" I protested.

"And shouldn't that be enough? You should never have gotten close to him."

I had no need to ask to whom Hiei was referring. His eyes held all the necessary accusations.

"Hey, don't blame me for this," I said defensively. "I can't help it if Ryu fell in freaking love with me."

Hiei's eyes narrowed.

"What?" I asked, fidgeting in place. "He's not really in love with me, Hiei-he barely knows me. Ryu just thinks I'm relatable and is a teensy bit obsessed."

"You're quick to defend him."

My jaw dropped open. "What, so now you're implying that I'm in love with him?"

"He might be relatable," Hiei spat, mimicking my earlier words in a spot-on parody of my tone and rhythm.

I wriggled my fingers at him and made a spooky 'woo-OOO-ooo'-ing sound. "I sense with my psychic eye some subtext!"

Oddly enough, that managed to get a laugh out of him. It was a harsh one, though.

"The only thing to mention here is that you," he said, taking a step closer, "are putting yourself at risk with Ryu."

"Hey, you're preaching to the choir, buddy," I replied. "He sold me out to Seishou for crap's sake—way are you acting like I'm ready to run back to him at the first opportunity?"

"Are you?"

"No!" I put my hand to my head again. "Why do I feel like our conversation just made a giant circle on itself?" I dropped the hand when Hiei did not reply, and then I walked around him. He did not stop me. "Let's just go after the others, all right?"

"And those clothes," Hiei said, walking after me so he could hover at my elbow. He dogged my steps like a Labrador. "Those are men's clothes. Why are you wearing them?"

"You sure, ask a lot, of questions," I huffed between steps.

"Are they Ryu's?"

"Quit it with this Ryu business!" I screeched, stopping so I could round on him. My snake-like turnabout did not seem to register with the unflappable fire demon. "In case you went momentarily deaf back in that stupid holding cell, I used my dress to tie up the guards and then I stole these clothes off of the one I took the shape of! Jesus Christ you're annoying!"

He didn't seemed fazed by that last sentence, which had been said in explosive English. "You mean you undressed in front of him," Hiei said—well, whispered. I did not like the angry light boiling in his eye.

"I knocked him out first," I said sullenly. "And even if he had been awake, I don't see why it should matter. I mean really, Kurama's seen me naked and it didn't get weird between us afterward."

We both froze, gazes locked.

"When did Kurama see you naked?" Hiei asked.

Heat flushed my face. "Let's just go, OK?"

"Not until you tell me when he saw—"

"What the hell does it matter, Hiei, I—"

"Tell me, you stupid woman!"

_Let's keep you guessing,_ I thought cruelly, and I said: "Near the beginning."

"You mean, right after you first came to the temple?"

"Yes."

I heard Hiei draw in a slow breath. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did he see you... undressed?"

_Wait... does he think we had _sex _or something?_ I thought, and the blush deepened. _Um, no! _"I'm not at liberty to say."

He took a single step forward and whispered: "_Why_?"

His look was so intense, so hair-trigger violent that I found myself becoming afraid of Hiei. "It was the day he found me in the woods, alright?" I said in an equally quiet voice. Hopefully Hiei couldn't smell fear like some sort of emotional bloodhound. "I didn't have any clothes on. Why did you think I came back wearing his jacket, because I thought the color brought out my eyes or something?"

His expression of murderous intent melded into his familiar satisfied mask. "I see," he said, and he smirked. "Now we can go."

I didn't move. "Why does it matter so much?"

"Who said it did?"

"You did."

"No, I didn't."

"Yes, you did."

"When?"

I bit my lip. "Well, you never really _said—_"

"There, you see?"

"God DAMMIT, you are infuriating!" I hissed, and with more anger than I ever I said: "If it didn't bloody matter then why did you want to know so badly?"

He looked away, and when I saw the muscles in his jaw clench like woodworking clamps I felt the gnawing sensation of a theory—a horrible one—start to nip at the ankles of my consciousness. My words had planted the seed of an idea—an awful, horrible, appalling idea. "No no no no no," I said in English. I hooked the umbrella over my elbow so I could run my hands through my hair. "No way, man. Don't do this to me."

Hiei looked rightfully annoyed. "Stop using that language."

I leveled a finger at him and glared so intensely I thought my eyes might burst. "If you like me," I said in quiet English, "if you so much as _think_ about liking me in a romantically inclined way, I will punch Botan in the face so hard she gets knocked into Inuyasha, and I've read enough fanfiction to know that that's a kiss of death."

Confusion made his red eyes turn dark. "What did you just say about Botan?"

"All Mary Sues are friends with Botan. I will not take that chance, and so help me, Hiei, I like Botan so you can't let me punch her, but I'll have to do it if you turn me into a Mary Sue," I said warningly, the English words spilling out in a frazzled mess, "and that makes me angry. You won't like Dani when she's an angry Mary Sue."

"_Marisu_? What in the world is that?" he said, batting my hand out of his face. "You keep saying it. I want to know why."

I debated repeating my tirade in English, but decided against it. Call me cowardly, but I was not about to risk Hiei's wrath... or a confession, for that matter. Neither would end well at that point.

"First of all, Mary Sue is a person, and she's no one you would want to meet," I said with a sigh, and I started walking for what I hoped was the final time. "Just forget it. We need to catch up with the others."

I almost screamed in frustration when he pulled me back around by the wrist, and I caught a flash of his incredible eyes before actually screaming into the night. He yanked me up to him, face hovering an inch from mine, and for one horrifying second I thought that maybe, maybe he was going to kiss me—

—but then I felt my stomach lurch as he hefted me over his shoulder, and all I could do was muffle my shout and hold on for dear life as he ran full out over the cobblestones. I was unable to tell what was going on from my upside down vantage point, but when I heard a shout and had another sickening moment of being thrown about...

"What happened?" I said, dazed as I found myself on my feet again. Someone caught me by the shoulders to hold me up, and I found myself looking at none other than Yusuke Urameshi. Behind him rose the Terrace stairs; we were crammed in the middle of a small, shadowy alcove of yellow flowers that was near the steps' wide base.

"She was taking too long," I heard Hiei say from somewhere to my left, but I swallowed my denial before it could come out.

_I'll get you for this, Hiei,_ I thought as Yusuke smirked, and his hands fell to his sides.

"We don't have much of a plan at this point," Kurama said, getting right to business. "We know Ryu is up there, but there are several humans with him who we do not want getting hurt. I think it would be best for us to lure or scare the humans away, then—"

"And_ I _think," Yusuke said, and from his tone I could tell that the issue was a point of contention amid the group, "that we should just bust in there and grab him before anyone can figure out who we are."

"But wouldn't it be better to just wait for Ryu to leave on his own and get him when he comes down?" Kuwabara said.

"They'll discover that we're missing before then," Kurama said. "Or maybe Ryu will never come down at all."

"He'll have to come down to torture us at some point," Kuwabara protested. "He promised he would when he first locked us up."

Kurama raised an eyebrow. "You'd trust a promise from Ryu?"

"No, which is why we need to move _now_," said Yusuke. "No waiting, no planning, just action. C'mon!"

Hiei had remained silent up until that point, but then he stepped forward. "I agree with the detective," he said. Behind him, the flowers swayed on a small breeze. "We need to move quickly, Kurama."

"You know what I think?"

Everyone shut up and looked at me. I hadn't meant to speak, but as soon as the words slipped out I realized that I—of all the people, _I_—had a plan.

"What do you think, Dani?" Kuwabara asked.

I shrugged, smiled, and tilted my head charmingly to the side. With a flutter of my eyelashes I sweetly said: "Anybody got a rock?"

* * *

"Ready?" I said softly,

The only one to answer me was Kuwabara. He was in the bushes to my right. I stood next to the Terrace stairs, bathed in the light from the windows above."Now?" he asked as he crouched amid the shadowed yellow flowers.

I nodded. "Now."

He promptly stood up and chunked the rock in his right fist at the Terrace. True to his word, the rock sailed through the air and collided with one of the building's many windows, shattering it into daggers of glass that then rained down into the garden.

"Hey, bitchface!" I screamed as loudly as I could, and I used all my vocal training to make the syllables boom across the air.

Kuwabara muffled a laugh as he ducked into the bushes and out of sight.

Shouts from within the Terrace made my pulse kick into high gear, and then a silhouette appeared at the broken window. The bright light behind him made it impossible to make out a face, but I remembered the set of Ryu's shoulders and knew beyond doubt who I was looking at.

"Dani?" he said in a disbelieving voice. Then his tone skirted into the commanding register. "Dani, come here. Now."

"But where's the fun in that?" I said, trying to sound as casual as possible. "I just spent god knows how long looking for my friends and failing epically, so now it's your turn. It's only fair."

Ryu didn't move, but another voice—one I did not recognize—called: "It's a trick. She's working for them."

"She's not," Ryu said, not moving. "Dani, stop this. Join me."

"Hmm..." I said, stroking my chin as I pretended to think about it. Then I stuck out my tongue and flipped him off. "Nope!" I turned around; my next two steps carried me out of the light's circle and into the garden's darkness, and I heard Ryu call: "Wait!"

"Come and catch me!" I yelled over my shoulder, and the words had barely passed my lips when Hiei appeared in front of me. Without a word I did what we rehearsed and went to him, letting him wrap one arm around my waist and one arm around my shoulders so he could carry me like a battering ram into the night. I closed my eyes, trying not to feel motion sick as he pelted over the ground and the wind rushed passed me, and soon enough I lost track of all the twists and turns and just let my mind go free.

_Call to him,_ said Hiei's voice, and I drove out all thought and whispered a name.

_Ryu._

A reply came like a warning shot, a harsh dagger of gold-colored recognition slicing through my brain. It reeked, of course, of breadflower. I pulled away sharply, only to call out to Ryu again when our contact fizzled, but that time his mind followed mine deep down into the well of my consciousness when I pulled away. He tried to worm his way in, to see what I held in my memory's grasp, but I resisted. A tug-of-war ensued, our energies battling it out like a disharmonious yin and yang, and then I felt Hiei's purple thoughts rushing at the edge of my own.

I knew he was trying to help me, which made it difficult to slap him away like some sort of buzzing fly, but Ryu wasn't supposed to know Hiei was out of prison. I battled Ryu on my own, Hiei watching for any sign of weakness at the edge, but eventually I forced Ryu out of my head with a shove of emotion and anger. Alone with Hiei's shadow in my head, I felt joyed, empowered, untrammeled...

A hand on my shoulder pulled me out of theta before a new skirmish could commence, and before I could lose myself to the rush of powerful emotion that hand shook me into wakefulness.

"He's coming," hissed a voice, and I blinked up at Kurama. His red hair surrounded our faces like a garnet curtain. "Wake up."

But before I could speak, something cool and smooth pressed against my open palm, and the fox demon vanished.

I sat up, realizing that Hiei had lain be down atop the bench in the breadflower circle, and in the same stroke I realized they had left me all alone—to the naked eye, at least. Doubtless they were watching from somewhere, but even with that knowledge I felt exposed. Clothes did nothing to stop myself from feeling naked.

I looked at the object in my hand, swallowed down my nerves, and tucked it deep into my pocket.

Not but a few seconds later, Ryu sprinted into view. His wild eyes and tumbling hair made him look like a lost child, but a feral one you wouldn't want to be tasked with hugging, and when he saw me he stopped, took a deep, rattling breath, and spoke.

"Do not run," he said.

I kicked off my shoes, stretched, and lifted my bad foot into the air. "Is that supposed to be a joke?" I asked, my stunted toes twitching as I tried to wiggle them. They looked like maggots on the end of my foot, alive and wriggling on their own. I knew it freaked most people out, but Ryu didn't seem perturbed.

"You certainly got here quickly," he said, taking one slow step after another toward me.

I shrugged, shoving my hands into the pocket of my pants. "Maybe you don't know this garden as well as you think you do."

He said nothing as he came to sit next to me on the bench.

"So what happens now?"

His lips quirked. "You've been asking me that a lot, lately," he said.

"It seemed applicable on all occasions." I stood. "I'll say it again: what happens now?"

Ryu stood, too, and turned me toward him by grabbing my shoulder. "Come with me, Dani," he said, but there was only a pleading sort of hope in his voice. "Come with me. I'll protect you."

"From?" I asked.

"Everything," he whispered.

I shook my head, fingers running over the thing in my pocket's surface. "You're not gonna like this, but the only thing I need protection from is you, Ryu."

His brow furrowed.

"I heard you tell Seishou that I'm an American," I said bluntly. His face went very, very still. "For someone who wants to protect me so much, you sure do have a funny way of showing it."

"I can protect you from him," Ryu urged. His hands gripped my upper arms like manacles, painful and tight and uncaring. "Please, trust me!"

I took a deep breath, recalling promises to Kurama that seemed thousands of years out of date. "Ryu..." I said, letting a wheedling tone seep into my voice, and I wanted him to not fall for my downcast eyes, to see past my lies and into the thorny truth beneath. But then hope dawned in Ryu's features and I knew my one-word act had worked.

From there, there was no turning back.

His arms went around me a moment later, holding me tight with an obsessive sort of love I could taste bitterly on my tongue. My hand came out of my pocket, arching up behind him, and to Ryu it must have felt like I was returning his embrace.

I wasn't.

The seed Kurama had given my cracked when I slammed in onto Ryu's spine, and I felt the vines within burst free below my fingertips like snakes just waiting to strike. Ryu's arms tightened around me, breath hissing into my ear, and he staggered backward as the vines dug into his skin and skittered around him, binding his hands to his sides and his mouth shut.

Purple eyes stared at me, agonized by my betrayal as vines twined into his hair and bloomed with scarlet flowers.

The tears came freely. I was tired of crying.

"I'm sorry," I said, and I turned away.

I sat down as the boys came out of the bushes like ghosts. Ryu's eyes widened as he struggled against the vines, and with a snarl he bit through the one gagging him and spat amid a shower of dead plant: "I trusted you!"

"You shouldn't have," said Hiei, and as he and the others neared Ryu I saw movement out of the corner of my vision.

Ryu's friends had arrived.

They numbered twelve, by my count: six humans, five men and one woman, and six demons who appeared mostly human (one had horns and a tail, but the others just had really weird hair and skin and stuff).

"Aw, shit," Yusuke muttered, and one of the humans struck.

It was the woman, so you feminists can rest easy when I say she kicked ass. With a cry she darted toward Ryu, hands out with fingers spread, and a burst of white light shot out and struck Yusuke in the chest. The force made him skitter back a few feet, shocked at this display of prowess, but by the time everyone on my team took in the fact that these humans were actually dangerous, the demons had surged forward. Two swarmed Hiei, two swarmed Kurama, and the last two went after Kuwabara. All but one of the humans went right after Yusuke, and the last one walked right up to Ryu and began to free him with what appeared to be a letter opener.

It only took the severing of one vine to give Ryu enough room to rip the others off. Frozen in shock, I only realized that I was a sitting duck when Ryu and his rescuer looked at me with fire in their eyes.

Ryu could kill me with his pinky finger. That much was undeniable. Fighting him was not an option.

Still, I should have tried.

I didn't.

Hiruma held his hand out. "My ring, young lady," he said sternly.

I didn't move, watching my friends battle demons and humans in a growing fray behind Ryu and Hiruma.

"Young lady," Hiruma said, and I wordlessly took the ring off of my finger and held it out. He moved forward, took it, and returned to Ryu's side.

"I am not going to kill you," Ryu said slowly. "I am not even going to hurt you. I am simply going to warn you, Dani from America. Get in my way..." He took a deep breath. "I like you too much. Despite all you've done to me, I still like you so much, and if you interfere I will lock you up and never let you out again. You are too distracting, Dani, and if loving you will tear my goals apart..." He looked away. "I will come back for you, but not until all your betrayals will amount to nothing." His eyes met mine, and he smiled. I didn't understand him at all. "Enjoy your freedom while you can, Dani. I'll be back for you."

All references to the Terminator seemed pale as he pulled a knife from his breast pocket and carved a rift in the empty air. The wound opened up, showing me a vision of white water and rising foam, and Hiruma's body blocked it as he went through the hole.

"Persevere, friends!" Ryu called to the battling people.

"Sacrifice!" was their unified response.

I'm not going to describe the way Ryu kissed me with pretty language or tight metaphors. He just walked up, leaned down, and pressed his lips to mine. No tongue, no movement, just... a press. It promised much, and he lingered there for longer than I felt was necessary, and then he stroked my hair. The knife clattered to the ground with a ping of metal on stone.

I'm ashamed to say I did nothing to stop him walk through that portal and into the world beyond. I just... couldn't. I don't know why. I won't waste time explaining why I sat there and watched the portal zip itself closed, and I won't agonize over details on how long the fight took, or how eventually Yusuke and co. incapacitated all the enemies in the courtyard with no casualties. The prisoners faced the situation gamely enough, hardly acknowledging the vines Kurama bound them with, and when Kuwabara ran off to find a phone so he could call Botan or Koenma...

"What now?" Yusuke was asking.

No one asked me why I just let Ryu go. I don't know if they even noticed our exchange.

Kurama walked over to me, probably to check if I was still alive since I hadn't moved in almost five minutes, and he spotted Ryu's knife on the ground. A kerchief from his pocket kept his skin away from the metal's surface when he picked it up. The runes carved into the knife's blade glimmered in the starlight.

"Now," said Kurama, holding up the knife so he could study it. "Now, we fight."

My head hung low in shame, but in the dark of my mind I vowed to be brave, braver than my sorry excuse for courage had allowed me to be in the face of Ryu's wrath. I didn't know how well I would be able to honor that vow, but with a shudder I steeled myself to pain, to death, to heartache, and to losing everything.

I was not only saving Koenma's world, after all, but my own.

When I raised my head, Hiei was regarding me through eyes of blood and hope and pain.

_

* * *

_

NOTES/FACTS:

_And so ends the hotel arc. What shall happen next?_

_Fact: Kurama saw Dani naked in chapter four. Mmm hmm. So has he gotten farther with Dani than any other love interest? YOU BE THE JUDGE._

_Fact: We need more humor. This was morose. No bueno._

_Fact: Expect more Hiei and Koenma "moments" from here on out. _

_Fact: This chapter was a b-i-t-c-h to write. Like, for realz. Word up._

_Fact: My favorite movie right now is "Blood & Chocolate," based on the novel of the same name by Annette Curtis Clause (who is also a favorite author of mine). Though the movie has few similarities to the book, making it feel like a new story entirely, I still love it. The distinct flavor of each compliments the other. WATCH OR READ THEM BOTH. I COMMAND YOU._

_Fact: I have a blog. If you like super villains, humor writing, or maybe-kinda-sorta just me as a person, you might find it entertaining. I promise it's not too boring... I hope, ha ha. It's about my life as seen through the eyes of a super villain in training, which sounds really "WTF"-worthy but is actually really fun to write. www(dot)villainousventing(dot)blogspot(dot)com_

_Fact: All of my reviewers are beasts, and that's a good thing. I was really insecure about the last chapter, thinking it was one of the worst I'd ever written, but it ended up being the favorite chapter for many of you. Your words showed me that I need to have a little more faith in myself, and that's something I have trouble with. Lately I've been suffering from a lot of doubt about my abilities; it feels like my novel is creeping along at a snail's pace, and the last work I had critiqued by a classmate got torn into bits. You guys, however, always boost my mood and my confidence, and for that I can never thank you enough. (*Graph bows deeply*)_

_That novel, should it somehow defy all logic and get published, will be dedicated to FFnet and the people I've met on here, by the way-just thought you should know =]. You guys mean a lot to me, more than you might think._

_Kai-chan94, ilovemusicrox12, DoilyRox, kurochanwithwings, Rokkugoh, Sarah Jackson-The Other, Dragon of Twilight, Redwing-Vampire, oceanabyss, Koryu Elric, Mahgot, Wolf-Cry-Night, LadyoftheGags, dumbrat, chocolateluvr13, Heart's Icy Touch, SillyGoddessDisco, HeeHeeHee01, colbub, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, HitsugayaFanGirl, AkaMizu-chan, modchic15, ovenfreshh, ShadowFireFox13, WorldsAngel, American Senpai, WickedLovelyDream, crossyourteez, heve-chan, ichixichigo, Kaiya's Watergarden, Raging Lulu, 0nfateswings, rain chant, Pirazz, Reclun, Foxgirl Ray, and Turtle Kid! THANKS FOR THE COMMENTS! _

_Title credits go to PASSION PIT!_


	32. Chapter 32: In Transit

Future Talk

Chapter 32:

"In Transit"

* * *

It did not take long for Kuwabara to somehow get word of Ryu's disappearance to Koenma in Spirit World, and it took only a little while longer for Botan to come swooping down into the courtyard on her oar like a kind of fighter pilot with incongruous blue hair. Kuwabara beat her there, of course, but only barely, and that made me wonder just how quickly someone could travel between the Spirit and Human World. Was it really as easy as Botan made it seem?

"I came as fast as I could," she said, touching down on the cobblestones just as her oar disappeared in a static burst of daisy yellow light. "Where's the knife?"

Kurama held up the kerchief. "Here."

Botan let out a rush of tense breath and went to him, taking it with careful but quick fingers. From the pocket of her iconic pink kimono she pulled an odd-looking jar: the top was silver, but made up of a bunch of riveted pieces of metal like something out of a science fiction film, and when she pressed the large red button on the top's center the metal sheets folded outward with a hiss and a small burst of steam. Botan's tongue poked out of the corner of her mouth as she carefully dropped the knife into the glass belljar below the lid, and then she pressed the flaps closed. Another hiss of air later and the knife had been sealed away, presumably in a vacuum of some kind.

"I'll take this back to Spirit World for analyzation straight away," Botan says, and she glanced at the lot of us through worried—but determined—eyes.

I was still sitting on the bench, holding my umbrella across my knees while I kept my back straight and tall. Hiei stood some ways off, looking rumpled but rather handsome in his dirty tux, and Yusuke was sprawled out on the ground like some sort of beached whale. He was looking at the stars with his tie lying on the ground next to him, and Kuwabara stood over the bound and gagged Society members with a sour face.

"You guys sure know how to hide your phones," he muttered, looking at them darkly.

The only female of the group glared beneath her trailing up-do and glittering ruby tiara. She was a pretty woman, but her ragged appearance and her earlier display of prowess only let me look at her as something to be both feared and pitied.

"Speaking of Spirit World," Kurama said, clearing his throat, "but what do we do with our prisoners?"

The group of them seemed to stiffen as one.

"Koenma has rallied the Spirit Defense Force and they will be on their way shortly," she said primly as she gave the knife in its jar a lingering look. She then stowed it away inside of her kimono, rummaged around, and pulled out a silver object on a ring. "There's also a van parked in the hotel's garage, on the top floor. One of you will need to drive back to Genkai's temple for the time being."

"I'm going to have to ride in one of those things?" Hiei said with pronounced distaste, but since everyone ignored him I figured that the argument was an old one.

"And what about the Book?" Yusuke asked.

"Remember the company we keep, Yusuke," Kurama said dryly, and he glanced at the Society group. They were all staring at Yusuke like he was a piece of steak, and Yusuke stared back with a comical 'What the heck?' expression, inching away over the ground one small movement at a time.

"Oh, I won't say anything about where the Book really is, nor where it's going to be in future," Botan said, voice sing-songy but rehearsed, like a very cheerful robot. "Only that Koenma has every teensie-weensie detail under control."

Kurama sighed. "No use discussing it now. Give me the key."

Botan held it to her chest. "What?"

"I'm the only driver here," Kurama said, and he held out his hand.

"No you're not."

Kurama and Botan looked at me; Yusuke lifted his head off of the ground and quirked an eyebrow at me.

"I've been driving since I was fifteen," I said, feeling self-conscious.

"And hey, I just got my license a month ago," Kuwabara said. "The three of us can switch off driving. It'll be fun."

"What, so Hiei and I are the only useless ones?" Yusuke griped. "That's a twist."

Kurama stared at Yusuke. Yusuke looked away first.

Kuwabara said: "But Dani, do you even have a license here?"

My brow furrowed. Luckily, Botan hopped up on her heels, beaming, and solved that problem.

"As part of my job as an occasional undercover agent, Koenma gave me the ability to forge things for myself!" she chirped, and she held out her fist, palm-side down. A moment later her fist glowed yellow. "Things like papers, you know—drivers licenses are no exception."

Her hand turned over and her fingers opened. On her palm lay a small laminated card with my picture. I stood, walked over, and took it. But then my lips quirked, and I laughed.

"My name is 'Botan Dani?'"

"What?" Botan snatched the card away, stared at it, then sighed in dogged acceptance. "I guess I never learned your last name."

"Thompson," I supplied.

"To-mo-pu-su-n?" Kuwabara said, trying to work out the foreign symbols. "Weird."

"Ah, well, Botan will do for now," Botan said cheerfully. "Anyway, all of you should get a move on. The rest of the SDF is close, so I'll watch the prisoners until they get here."

Kurama nodded to her. "Seishou is still about, looking for..."

"Me," I finished. "I should probably get out of the open."

Nods were exchanged, and after saying a quick goodbye to Botan we headed out of the garden. The hotel, when we crossed through the huge lobby, appeared to be deserted, and our footsteps echoed across the marble room like gunfire. The parking garage was also empty, and though the walk up to the top deck was quiet, it was also stressful. But the dark green van sitting out under the stars looked untouched.

We piled in, Kurama taking the wheel with Kuwabara riding shotgun, and Yusuke shared the middle seat with me. Hiei took the one at the extreme back, sitting in shadow as per usual. We backed our tires squealing, and in a fit of very un-Kurama frenzy we tore out of the garage and onto a highway.

"I can actually see out of the windows this time," I said as we pulled away from the hotel. I finally got a look at the outside: sprawling grounds around a large marble building with excessive wings and tons of little towers. Gorgeous, of course, and huge.

"Beats riding in a pickup bed," Kuwabara joked, and then he saw the clock on the van's dashboard. "Damn, it's already two AM!"

Yusuke yawned, stretching, and then he took off his jacket and cuddled up to the door and window. "Nap time."

I felt similarly tired, now that he mentioned it, and I took off my stolen jacket to use as a pillow.

"All of you sleep," Kurama said as we passed under the fitful streaks of highway lights. "I'll wake one of you to drive in an hour."

My eyes closed without complaint.

* * *

I woke up from my atypically dreamless sleep to find Kuwabara shaking me. "Hey, Dani, it's your turn to drive."

We were parked on the shoulder of the three-lane highway, beneath a light that was taller than ten of our vans stacked vertically. Kuwabara had opened my door and unbuckled my seatbelt for me, and he looked about ready to drop if his squinted eyes were any indication.

"Did you already drive?" I asked, stupid with sleep, and he nodded.

"Kurama and I switched off an hour ago. You didn't wake up and I didn't want to rush you."

I glanced at the passenger seat. Kurama had leaned his forehead onto the window, serene and expressionless as he dreamed. His hair looked black in the dark.

Kuwabara scratched the back of his neck. "I'd have let you sleep longer, but I honestly can't keep my eyes open."

"I can do it," I said, sliding out of my chair. The night breezed into my face, smelling of car exhaust and pine.

"Thanks," said Kuwabara, and he climbed into the back. I shut the door behind him, then crawled up into the driver's side.

The chair was much too far back, so I had to pull it almost all the way forward, and then the mirrors were all wrong so I had to finagle them, too. Eventually, however, I put everything to rights and got the car going, and we were on our way once more.

But then a thought struck me.

"Um, Kuwabara?"

An uncommitted grumble.

"I don't know how to get to the temple."

He did not answer. Someone else, however, did.

"I've got you," said a voice. "Big guy's asleep already. Just keep going down along the road, OK?"

I glanced into the rearview mirror. Yusuke stared back, brown eyes glinting in the intermittent light.

"Thanks," I said.

"No problem."

I had forgotten, when I first got behind the wheel, that the roads in Japan were reversed from the ones in America. However, since the highway was three entire lanes wide and it was so late that there were quite literally zero drivers on the road besides myself, I encountered no problems and was able to get used to sitting on the right side of the car without hassle. Still, when I clumsily rounded a very sharp turn just a little too quickly, Yusuke gave a small chuckle.

"It bugs me that I can't see you when you insult me," I said, wanting to laugh and snap at him at once.

"Too bad," Yusuke said.

We went on in silence for a time, and I'll admit that I was enjoying the drive. Yusuke muttered low directions in the dark when he needed to, for which I was grateful. But something in his tone made me tense, because he wasn't snapping at me or being a sarcastic little punk like usual.

"You OK?" I asked him.

"Tired," he said.

"Sleep, then. Tell me the next few turns and we'll be fine."

I heard him shifting below the sound the tires on the pavement. "Not happening. You're not a very good driver."

"We drive on the other side of the road where I come from," I explained, and he snorted.

"What kind of backwards country do you come from?"

"The kind with waffles."

"You never really explained what those are for."

"They're for eating, and they're delicious. That's all that needs to be said."

Silence reigned for a little while.

"You know," Yusuke said, "I might have been a little unfair. Before."

I did not reply, focusing on the road ahead of me and the way the white lines flew into the dark behind me.

"You're pretty much clueless. Can't blame you for that too much." His voice sounded pained, casual, and apologetic all at once. "And hey, you were pretty brave tonight."

"No I wasn't." The words came out harsh. "I'm just… _avoiding_ the real issues."

"And what are those?"

I hesitated, then said: "You guys all know I lied to you. About… the thing I can do."

He shifted again, and my fingers tightened around the leather steering wheel.

"You might be a liar," Yusuke said, "but you're on our side. And you lied because you were scared."

I said nothing, and just when I thought my conversation with Yusuke was over, he spoke.

"I've known Kuwabara since middle school," he said. "We weren't friends back then, you know. We just fought all the time, but I think he knew me better than anyone regardless. He's like that. He can always sense the good in people." A low chuckle. "Me, though? I can't sense emotion like he can—I'm as psychic as a rock. I can sense power levels and shit like that, not intent and character. But Kuwabara can do it better than anyone I know, maybe even better than Genkai. And you know what? He's been right so many times that I trust him. No question."

A pause.

"And Kuwabara… he says you're all right. Secretive and whatnot, but not bad. I've ignored him until now, but you freed us, defied Ryu, and…"

He trailed off.

"Thanks, Yusuke," I said a little while later.

"No problem."

We didn't say anything, then, just drove along in the dark. The white lines streaked past.

That's when my eyes started playing tricks on me.

"Whoa," I said, blinking. "How long have I been driving."

"About an hour," Yusuke said, and I saw the thing again. A silvery blur on the side of the road, hovering about six feet off the grassy divider between the sides of the highway—it flickered past, a ghost of an illusion I could barely see—and then it happened again, only this time it was closer, within arm's length of the car. A black cloud floated under the silver orb like a storm-cloud. The vision—if that's indeed what it was—was surreal yet almost too disturbing to be fake. Only, I knew that the hyper-real vision could only be a dream because it vanished and reappeared so quickly, hovering at the edges of my sight dozens of times over a half-mile stretch of road. Nothing real could do that.

"I need to give the wheel up," I said, rubbing my eyes with a hand, and I started to pull the van over.

"What's wrong?" Yusuke asked.

"Seeing things," I said, and I felt a hand on my arm. I looked up, startled, into the completely awake face of Kurama. He sat in the seat next to me with a bolt-straight back, staring into the darkness ahead with piercing eyes.

"Faster," he said simply. "Seishou has found us."

To say that I floored it would be an understatement: I pressed on the gas so hard the van shuddered like a frightened horse, and Kurama slammed back against his seat from the force of our acceleration.

"I thought I was seeing stuff!" I said, feeling panic rise in my chest, but then I remembered my vow to be brave and did my best to breathe.

"Apparently not," Kurama said, and Seishou appeared—metal mask and all—at the side of the highway again.

"What do you think he's doing?" Kuwabara said, and I jumped. I hadn't realized he was awake.

"Scoping us out," Hiei said from the back. "Let me out of the car. I'll kill him." Something in his voice told me that he could, and would if the opportunity arose.

"We can out run him," Kurama said, obviously not wanting to risk an altercation.

"Seriously? He's keeping up," said Yusuke. "I say we stand and fight."

"Not in our condition," Kurama said, shaking his head so that his hair flew around his face. "It's a risk we should not take."

"Maybe I can mask out energies," Kuwabara said, trying to be helpful. "If we can't out run him or out fight him, then let's out smart him."

His words made the wheels start turning in my head.

"This van's got four-wheel drive," Kuwabara urged. "We can split up, some in the van and some on foot."

"He's looking for me," I said slowly.

"We won't let him get to you, Dani," Kurama said in a reassuring voice.

"It's not that," I replied, hands in a death-grip on the wheel which was suddenly much harder to control. "It's just… what if _I _disappear?" A pause. "Remember how I said I'd show you my shapeshifting sometime?"

Kuwabara understood me first, bless him. "What are you going to do?" he asked, and I smiled grimly to myself.

"Well, my name's Botan according to my license," I said, and I grabbed Kurama's wrist. "Take the wheel. I can't promise to pay attention."

His hand darted out and started steering. "Dani, what—"

By then it was too late for words. I was opening my lip's old wounds.

* * *

I dove down deep into theta, propelled by fear and dedication, and I found myself in a white space of static and emptiness. With a burst of energy I summoned up and image of the blue-locked grim reaper, and as I stared into her impassive doll's face I concentrated on everything that made Botan _Botan_.

It was a deeper shift than any I had made before. I thought about her energy, her willpower, her voice and her tenacity as much as I thought about her hair and eyes and skin. Her laugh, her mannerisms, her likes and dislikes and idiosyncrasies... I effused myself in the memory of her essence, feeling my opinion of her envelop me like some sort of warm bath.

I surfaced from that bath feeling less like myself and more like something alien, and then I immersed myself again.

When all but the tiniest portion of myself remained, I surfaced.

* * *

Kurama was still jerking at the wheel when I felt my eyes open. "Goodness," I breathed, hearing my British voice surge out of my mouth like cotton candy. It was foreign but not unpleasant, and it sounded so much like Botan that it shocked even me. I took the wheel. "Goodness gracious. That was a doozie of a trip, wasn't it?"

Kurama stared at me like a bomb ready to go off, and Yusuke said: "What the _fuck_?"

I shot Yusuke a dark look in the rearview mirror. "Language. As in, please watch it. Oh, but this seat is pulled up much too far for me! Who was driving before me, a midget?"

"Botan?" Kuwabara asked, dumbstruck, and then he gripped the back of my seat and leaned around it so he could see my face. "Holy crap, you look just like Botan."

I giggled, catching another glimpse of Seishou passing by. "But I _am _Botan!"

"You even sound like her," Kurama said, eyes flickering over me in frank assessment. "You're her height, too."

"Oh, it was nothing really," I said, practically singing. "Just a little something I whipped up."

Yusuke let out a laugh that sounded more like a wail. "Even your vocabulary is the same!"

"It most assuredly is," I agreed. "And would one of you be a dear and read my energy signature?"

Silence, and the Kuwabara said: "Dani. That's crazy."

The name-Dani?-did not register.

"I'm not Dani, I'm Botan," I said, brow furrowing in confusion, and for a moment I felt something strange cover me up, like a rising tide or a descending darkness. I was Botan in the moment, with no recollection of who that Dani person was or the feel of my own self, and with a jolt I shook my head from side to side.

_Dani_, I thought, _I'm Dani,_ and the tide of Botan began to recede.

"Hey, what gives?" Yusuke said then, and hair-brown hair streaked with blue-flopped over my face. I glanced at my own eyes in the mirror, and for one disorienting second they were multicolored, brown swirled with magenta swirled with everything at once. I knew, on some deep, visceral level, exactly what was happening.

"Don't call me Dani anymore," I hissed in my own voice, and then I was letting the feel of Botan wash back over me.

It was then that our windshield exploded.

A jagged circular hole about two feet in diameter opened up in front of me, and cuts made my face awash with blood. I screamed in the voice of the grim reaper and jerked the car onto the shoulder of the highway; my side of the van connected with the cement safety wall and screeched along it for a good fifty feet, shedding the side mirror and bursting out the side window as it went, and before my eyes was a cold silver face that glowed brighter than any moon. Behind it billowed a cloak of darkness and despair that obscured the way the van's headlights pierced the night ahead, and as I screamed a hand tipped with metal claws dove through the shattered glass and twined into my hair. The car shuddered to a halt and Seishou tried to drag me through the hole in the windshield, but I braced my hands against the web of clinging shards just as I felt a myriad of hands clutch at my skin and hair.

"Dani!" someone shouted as the glass dug into my palms and the hand pulled tighter into my hair. "Botan!"

I screamed again, louder as I was pulled from all directions, and I tried to look back at my friends for support. But the night had pressed in close and all I could see was shadow and eyes glinting in it like enraged stars, and I thrashed from side to side, trying to get away. Strands of torn blue hair tickled my neck as the pain in my head grew to unheard of heights, and I was lifted out of my seat as a voice like a god said: "You're mine!"

Suddenly, cold blue light pierced the darkness at my back.

"Kurama, D-Botan, DUCK!"

I tried to do as he said, and then I felt a warm hand brace itself on my back. Yusuke's voice was thunderous in my ear as he pushed me down and shoved his hand through the gaping hole in the windshield. The light flared in my periphery like a small sun.

"SPIRIT GUN!" he cried, and with a high pitched boom the sun blossomed into an inferno.

The blast struck just below the metal mask, so I'm guessing it hit Seishou square in the chest. He flew backward, but his hand did not relinquish its hold on my hair and more than a few strands were ripped free, taking some of my scalp with it, and the rest of the windshield followed him in a Milky Way of glass. His mask and cloak tumbled over on themselves like rags in a wind, and he collided with the asphalt with an audible crack and thump. Then he lay still, bathed in the glow of our flickering headlights.

"Did we... kill him?" Kuwabara said in the unexpected silence, and part of the cloaked mass twitched.

Without thinking about it, I slammed my foot onto the gas pedal. The van surged forward, sending everyone tumbling back into their seats, and Seishou managed to raise his masked head right before he disappeared beneath my bumper. He looked rather surprised, which made me start laughing Botan's laugh, and then there were two horrible lumps in the pavement that made the van rock and sway. I bit my tongue on the second one. I did not stop driving.

"Dani," Kurama said as I drove us ever onward.

"Who?" I said through my hysteric laughter. My head stung, partially scalped and totally exposed to the air rushing through the hole where the windshield was supposed to be. "Who? I'm Botan!"

"Dani, snap out of it!" I heard Yusuke said, and he leaned forward to grab one of my shoulders.

I did not stop laughing. "Who? Who? I'm _Botan_!"

"She's gone nuts," Yusuke said.

"I'm perfectly fine!" I howled.

"Leave it to me," said Hiei, speaking for the first time in a long time, and then I felt him in my head.

I didn't try to combat his descent into my mind because the Botan-me didn't realize that's what was happening. It was only when Hiei's presence all but disappeared inside me that I remembered what he could do, and when I felt him pulled strings of my true self up out of the depths like vines out of quicksand I screamed, pained at the sudden influx of memories, and then Botan disappeared completely. But I was forced without any warning back into my true self, and the shock of such a reversal was so alien that I had to lean toward my missing window and vomit out of the moving car. Hair tumbled past my cheeks, brown and long and ragged, and the seat felt right around me again.

"Can someone," I panted in my old voice, feeling weaker than I had ever felt in my entire two lives combined, "please drive now?"

* * *

I don't remember the rest of the drive, but the sun was rising when we pulled up to the temple's thousand steps, and I don't remember ditching the car or mounting the first step, but I do remember collapsing about halfway up and getting a piggyback ride from Kuwabara, who was fast becoming my favorite cripple-friend. Then I remember seeing Genkai through sleep-starved eyes and the dark halls rushing past me, and then the feeling of a pillow beneath my head…

But beyond all that and the way the temple looked silhouetted against the velvet and diamonds night sky, there's nothing.

* * *

There was, however, a dream.

"I should have warned you," he whispered, breath in my hair and arms around me. I think we were sitting down with me lying in his lap, but I can't be sure. "You can't go that deep into a real person. If you do and you can't find yourself again, you'll never wake up."

I couldn't find the strength to speak, eyelids fluttering with the effort.

"Your soul is drained now," he said, rocking me so gently it made me think I was with my mother again. "You won't be able to defend yourself for days. Oh, Dani, why did you do that?"

"Ko..."

"Shh," he said, stroking my torn scalp and hair, "don't try. Just listen to me."

I didn't move.

"When you try to become a real person, not just in looks but in manner and soul, like you did today, you run the risk of becoming lost in them," Koenma said, still rocking me. I almost fell into sleep-within-sleep, but something kept me conscious. "It's too dangerous, like diving so deep into the ocean that you get crushed by the pressure. Copying their looks is snorkeling in comparison."

"Ko..."

"Shh," he said, shushing me again. "I know you only wanted to confuse Seishou, but promise me-never do that again!" His arms tightened around me shoulder.

Somehow, out hands found each others. I tried to squeeze his fingers, but failed.

"Pro... mise," I managed, and then I fell into dreamlessness.

* * *

I had been sitting on the porch for a good hour or so, studying the way the sun met with the mountains as it retired for the night, when Botan came to fetch me. She sat down beside me on the edge, feet dangling above the flowers Genkai had so carefully planted. Her hair smelled like cold and rushing wind, but I suppose that was to be expected.

"He'll be here soon," she said in a low voice, watching the sun travel behind a copse of hilltop pines. The light shone through them like it was under water.

I grunted in reply. My hands twisted around the umbrella resting across my knees.

"Kurama told me about you... looking like me." She laughed hollowly. "I will admit that that creeped me out for a moment, but I suppose I should be flattered. Did I-you?-look good?"

"Gorgeous," I said, managing a small smirk.

"Good, then," she said. We didn't say anything for a few minutes, and then Botan broke the silence: "I'm just sorry that your plan to confuse Seishou did not work." She laughed again. "That van was totaled. Try Genkai next time? Her glare could fend anybody off."

"Only if she lets me _have _a next time after this," I said, but I wasn't trying to be funny.

My words made Botan's jaw drop. "Dani," she said upon recovery, a sense of urgency making me look at her for the first time. Her magenta eyes seemed to bleed into melancholy violet. "Dani, it will be OK. Really. You've done nothing wrong."

Another grunt for a reply made me think I was turning into Hiei. Scary thought, considering the previous night's events.

"Koenma just needs to tell us how the analyzation of the knife went," she said soothingly, and she put a hand over mine. I stopped twisting the umbrella. "Relax. The conversation isn't going to be about you."

"And that's what worries me," I muttered. The whole lot of us had slept for so long after getting back that we only woke up in time for dinner the next day. That meal had been attended in silent anticipation of a grilling; no one, least of all myself, seemed intent on talking about what had transpired, thank the higher powers. It was after that dinner that I had gone onto the temple porch to watch the sun go down.

Botan did not appear to hear me, nor did she notice my somber face. "Let's go inside. The others are waiting for us."

My heart fluttered a little, but an idea that would have once sent me into near cardiac arrest only served to slightly upset my stomach now. "Fine," I told her, and she stood up first before helping me to my feet. "Let's get this over with."

She smiled. "It'll be fine, you'll see."

I smiled back, thinking of all the meetings I had been to over the past month or so. This one was different from all the others, however, because this time...

Well, this time I had one less thing to hide.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Sorry this update didn't come at midnight, but for some reason I couldn't post chapters. It was really weird, too, because I thought I'd seen all the error messages FFnet could come up with. Last night proved me wrong._

_In an earlier chapter, Kuwabara drove a truck to the hotel and Dani and Botan rode in the back. In my head the vehicle belonged to the Spirit World and is now back wherever Koenma decided to keep it. Yay for continuity!_

_And I totally promise that next week's chapter will be so much longer than this. I had a legitimately horrible week, one that will go down in the history of my life as THE WORST EVER. But now I can only go up, and I will. Just watch. =P_

_Also, as a result of THE WORST EVER week, I was unable to reply to most of your reviews,which I really want to start doing more regularly. So you might be getting a review reply for chapter 30 reviews this week-sorry it's late, but... well, the all capital statement above is still in all capitals. =P_

_Also, Danielle Elaine Thompson won the name poll by an incredibly wide margin. I thought it was the most boring name, too (hey, what can I say, I'm bad at making up names!). =[ I used it in the chapter, during the driver's license scene. _

_You all spoil me with your lovely comments, and for them I can't thank you enough. All of you mean the world to me: Dragon of Twilight, Sarah Jackson-The Other, NA (leave an email so we can chat! =D), Zetsubel, Reclun, 0nfateswings, Rokkugoh, etowa-ru, colbub, ShadowFireFox13, AkaMizu-chan, Masuyo Shun, WickedLovelyDream, dumbrat, XAudra RoseX, ilovemusicrox12, rain chant, Kai-Chan94, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., ichixichigo, blackangelxvikkix, LadyoftheGags, Turtle Kid, Foxgirl Ray, Out-of-Control-Authoress, DoilyRox, Koryu Elric, Wolf-Cry-Night, Heart's Icy Touch, Ketsurui Kazutaka, Ry171819, T.R. Blessing, 9shadowcat9, HitsugayaFangirl, HeeHeeHee01, Mennis-chan, WorldsAngel, and American Senpai!_


	33. Chapter 33: I've Got a Theory

WARNING: This chapter contains lots of talking but a REALLY IMPORTANT FACT, too. So, skimming is unavoidable but not recommended. Tread carefully.

Future Talk

Chapter 33:

"I've Got a Theory"

* * *

We met in the big room with the fire place, but no fire burned and Koenma was not there, making Botan's words ring flat. The room was mostly dark, lit only by the small oil lamp on the mantle. Genkai sat on one side of a small tea table, and when Botan and I arrived I was escorted to a purple cushion across from Genkai herself. Everyone else-Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei, Kurama, and even Yukina-was standing at Genkai's back, not saying a word as they watched me get settled, and I took a deep breath to calm myself before saying: "Ask me anything."

"I intend to," Genkai said, arms folded over her ribs. That dry voice of hers broke over my skin like drought-wrought twigs. "First, what's your name?"

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Dani. You know that."

She grunted in reply. "And where are you from?"

"Um, America?"

"And your favorite food is...?"

I had no idea how to respond.

She glared. "It's a simple question."

"Pizza," I said, glancing at Kuwabara, Hiei, Kurama, and Yusuke in turn. None of them spoke, only stared. "What's this all about?"

"Just seeing what you look like when you tell the truth," Genkai said, "so I'll know when you lie."

"Oh."

She paused, gearing herself up for what she was going to say next. Her voice was gruff, but soft. "You're a shape-shifter."

My lips curled in one them selves, sucking into my mouth as I debated on a response. Finally I decided to say: "If that's what you want to call it, then yes."

"What would _you _call it?" Genkai asked.

I opened my mouth. Closed it. "I'm... not sure," I admitted. "It's a recent development. I haven't thought about the name too much."

"Just how recent is it, exactly?"

I glanced at Yukina, who was standing in front of Kuwabara like a delegate before her bodyguard, and so did everyone else. She seemed perplexed, fidgeting under our combined gazes. Unbeknownst to her, she was the answer to Genkai's question, but I just didn't know how to start.

"Why are we looking at Yukina?" I heard Botan whisper.

"She saw me... change... for the first time," I said, stumbling over the words I knew I had to say.

Yukina's eyes widened. "You mean, that night when your eyes were red-"

I nodded. "That was an accident, though. I'm not sure how it happened, or how I managed to turn back. I had never even known I could do that... thing, until then."

"So your little power only surface after you came to the temple," Genkai said.

"Yeah."

"It's not unheard of," she said, addressing herself more than me. "Spiritual awareness can be triggered by the proximity of other spiritual forces. The Book and all these demons and psychics were the sparks that set the fire going."

"Still, you felt demonic when I met you in the forest," Kurama said, speaking up at last. "That certainly did not start at the temple. How old are you, Dani?"

"Twenty," I said. "The day I died-I mean, the day I came here, it was my birthday."

"Whoa, you died on your birthday?" Kuwabara said, looking shocked. "That sucks! Had you even had cake yet?"

I shook my head. "I was a broke college student. Do you think I could afford one?"

Genkai seemed momentarily confused, but then her expression cleared. "I had forgotten your story," she said. "Dead by a knife wound, correct?"

"Yes."

"And yet your body is unmarked." She paused. "A new one, then. But whose was it?"

I shrugged. "Beats the heck out of me. I just woke up here. One hell of a disorienting experience, that."

"As was the shapeshifting, I assume?" Kurama said, and I nodded.

"It was pretty scary, actually," I told him. "I had no idea what was wrong with me."

"Why didn't you tell us what had happened?" Yusuke demanded. Oddly enough, he looked angry in a way that was not threatening at all. "We could have helped you get through it!"

"Hey, not even _I _understood what was happening right then," I shot back. "I thought I was

dying at first, but then everyone started freaking out and crowing me and I just... froze. You

were already so suspicious of me that I thought this would be a sort of death sentence." I paused before adding: "You guys are scary sometimes."

Kuwabara put a hand to his chin. "I see your point," he said, face screwed up

in concentration, "but I wish you'd told us earlier. Now it looks like you were hiding it on purpose."

Hiei snorted. "Not likely," he said, and I glanced at him. He was leaning against the wall, one ankle crossed over the other with his arms crossed over his chest. He looked more smug than I thought he had any right to look, and that irked me.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, and he smirked.

"After that incident, you practiced manipulating your new found powers in your room at night," he said, "or in the afternoons when you were alone."

Everyone's collective brow furrowed, but I said: "Hiei's right." I looked to Genkai. "I started practicing because I didn't want the whole fiasco repeating itself. To me, it looked like getting it under control would be the best option."

Genkai rubbed her temples. "You're right, but in a stupid way. Telling us would have been a better option." She turned to look at Hiei over her shoulder. "Care to share how you figured that out with the class?"

Hiei smirked again. "Anyone with spiritual sensitivity could have sensed her energy spikes at night. At first I attributed the spikes to the natural energy fluctuations found in dreaming, but then I grew suspicious and started to take note of them. I had no idea what she was doing, of course, but I knew that something was going on."

"I don't know how you could sense _anything _when the Book was here," Kuwabara grumbled. "It was a freaking miasma."

Hiei shrugged. "Our rooms are close together."

Genkai's abrupt subject change was jarring, but also understandable. "What all can you do?" she demanded. "How do your powers work?"

I hesitated.

"Go on," she urged, and suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder. Botan was leaning over me, concerned but encouraging.

"Tell them," she said softly, and I swallowed before turning back to Genkai. Botan sat down next to me, offering her silent support.

"I use theta state like you taught me," I said, and I held my hands up like they were grabbing an invisible basket ball. "I clear out everything so that I'm pretty much a blank slate, and then I insert an image into my... well, whatever it is. Then I just concentrate, and when I pulled out of theta it's usually there. Oh, and I usually have a little mini-chant thing in my head, too."

"Which is?"

I chuckled. "My creativity will astound you, but... 'change, change, change, change...' Like that. Oh, and when I don't have time to go into theta I can _also _change by feeling pain and doing the concentration-chant thing." I smiled at the boys. "Like when I smashed my foot in the cell, remember?"

They exchanged glances that said they had all been wondering about that.

"Oh, and sometimes I do a combination of theta and pain," I said, getting a little excited about being able to tell someone about all this, dammit. I had kept it a secret for far too long. "It's like the pain clears out my head so I can get to theta quicker. Pretty neat, huh?"

"In a way," Genkai said. "What have you been able to accomplish?"

I frowned, thinking about it, and started counting the things I'd done on my fingers. "I can change my hair color and eye color and skin and stuff pretty easily-actually, that's the easiest thing to do. After that, as far as easiness goes, is changing up my hair's length and my facial features. The littler the feature is, the better. Oh, and I can change the length of my limbs and I figured out how to shrink my hips, but if I don't shrink my thigh bones, too, my joints lock up."

"So you have to keep everything proportional, is that it?" Genkai asked.

"Pretty much, yeah."

"And how easy is it to hold onto a change once you make it?"

"Well, the holding part is just about effortless," I said. "Once the change is done, it's done, but it's the changing itself that exhausts me. I mean, I fainted after my first big change, and after I mimicked Botan in the car..." I stopped short. "Well, that incident was a special case."

"Special how?" Genkai asked.

I didn't know how to explain it, not really, and just as I felt myself start to babble incoherently Kuwabara came to my rescue. He stepped out from behind Yukina and sat down at the table with us, bigger than Genkai and I by far and looking a little ungainly because of it.

"I can explain that one," he said cheerfully, tipping me a wink as he spoke. "An outsider's view might be useful, right?"

"So what happened?" Genkai asked, impatient, and Kuwabara sighed.

"Always rushin' me in my moment of glory." A pause. "Now, I've only seen you shift yourself twice, Dani, but when I look at the differences between those times it's kind of obvious what happened."

"It is?" I asked, surprised, because I hardly knew myself.

"Well, yeah." He turned to address Genkai. "She impersonated a guard to break us out of that cell, and the only things she mimicked were the guy's hair and ears because the hair covered his face and the ears were even bigger than Jin's. She didn't have to get taller because they were pretty much the same height, and the guy's voice was high pitched so she didn't have to..." A pause. "_Can _you change your voice, Dani?"

The question caught me off guard. I floundered. "Um, uh, no? I mean, I _don't _know because I haven't ever tried."

"You should; it'd be neat. Anyway, when she looked like the guard, she acted like Dani. She was conscious of who she was and that she was actually _Dani_, not the demon guy."

It dawned on Kurama first. "And when she was Botan, she actually thought she was Botan."

"Exactly!" Kuwabara exclaimed, beaming. "A complete physical change into another person made her be the other person mentally, too, but a partial change only affected her physically."

"Hey, and she knows Botan pretty well, too," Yusuke chimed in. "It could be that she would have still been Dani on the inside had she changed into the guard completely, because she doesn't know what he's like or anything."

"I think you're _all _right," I said slowly, garnering their attentions. "When I changed into Botan, I actually focused on her laugh and her personality and expressions because I was hoping to trick Seishou into thinking I was her, and he's smarter than most so I felt like the deeper I went, the better. It was like I buried myself in Botan."

"Was I like a nice downy comforter, or quicksand?" Botan muttered, and I smiled.

"More like the ocean," I said kindly. "Very bright and hard to forget. I couldn't find myself until Hiei came along." I glanced at him. "Thanks."

He made a noncommittal noise under his breath, but I took it as a 'you're welcome' regardless.

Genkai said: "Don't try a full change like that again, not unless Hiei is around. You and I will work on it together."

My heart leaped. "You mean you're going to train me?" I said, breathless, and she nodded. "Even though I kept it a secret from you?"

Genkai snorted. "I'm not one to let fruit rot on the vine. You've got the power, and I'll train you."

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Why does this remind me of Rando?"

Kuwabara looked thoughtful. "You're right, even though he was a psycho mass murderer, she was going to train him if he won," he said.

"Who's Rando, and did you seriously just compare me to a psycho mass murderer?" I asked, glaring at the two humans, and Botan looked as antsy as a frightened horse.

"Of, don't you worry about him, he's long gone," she said, waving her hands in nervous dismissal. "And besides, you're much nicer that he was, isn't she, Yusuke?"

Yusuke whistled, nonchalant and not looking at me. I responded by chucking my umbrella cane at him. The point bounced off his shin and he yelped before falling on his butt. We stuck out our tongues at the same time, then laughed about it.

I caught myself thinking: _Yusuke isn't so bad, after all._

"I have a question," said Genkai, and at the sound of her serious voice the laughter died like a poisoned weed.

"Go ahead," I said, trying not to fidget, and Genkai stared at me like I was something the size of a bug.

"You can look like anyone, is that it?" she asked, and with a gulp I nodded.

"And you can look like anyone you choose?" she went on.

"Also yes," I said.

"So let me ask you this," Genkai said. "If you can look like anyone, why do you choose to look like _that_?"

I didn't understand her. "What are you talking about?" I asked, feeling lightheaded, and she waved a hand at me.

"You're not very pretty, Dani," she said. "Not bad, but very plain. Why aren't you looking like a movie star?"

I felt the blush heat my cheeks to egg-frying heights. "Well _excuse me_ for being a plain Jane!" I snapped, brushing my hair out of my too-warm face. "This is how I've always looked!"

"So you keep your face because it's familiar?"

"Well, yeah! That and I'd feel like a total fake if I started looking like Audrey Hepburn all of a sudden-what do you take me for, a trophy wife with a plastic surgery fetish?"

Botan leaned over and whispered: "Who's Audrey Hepburn?"

"You're kidding, right?" I snapped, and then I remembered and sighed. "She was a wonderful actress who I think epitomized feminine beauty, but that's not the point. The point is-"

"You haven't changed your leg, either," Genkai said. I shut up immediately. "It's painful and cumbersome and a nuisance. Familiarity isn't enough to make you keep that."

I stared at the tabletop before me, blushing again.

"Well?" I heard Genkai say. "Why don't you change it?"

"It's not that I don't want to," I said at last. "I just... can't."

"Can't, or won't?"

"Do you think I haven't tried?" I snapped, angry at Genkai's tone that said_: I think you're just clinging to your old self, scared of newness and change, and I think it's a won't, not a can't, and you __disappoint me, Dani._ "I tried so hard one night that I never actually went to sleep and I gave myself migraines from concentrating for so long, and I bashed my thumb in the door so hard my nail turned black, and _still _my leg wouldn't change!"

"I hate this leg!" I went on. "If I could be rid of it I would, but I can't, so I'm not going to sit around and bitch about it, OK?, and I don't think you should either."

No one said anything for a minute. Then Kurama murmured: "We won't bring it up again."

"Well, good!" I huffed.

"I wanna see you do something."

I looked at Yusuke, who was sitting cross-legged on the ground next to Genkai.

"C'mon," he said. "Do a trick."

His teasing irked me. "I'm not a dog!" I said.

"I want to see it, too," Genkai said, and her seriousness made my head cool down.

"What should I do?" I asked dubiously.

"Just mimic one of us," Genkai said, and I looked at my options.

"Well, the more outstanding looking they are, the better I can mimic them," I said, preparing myself. "I haven't been able to make any shifts from scratch. I'm not a visually creative person, I guess."

"Who will you choose?" Kurama asked.

I glanced at Botan. She blinked, then pointed at herself. I nodded.

"It's the hair that makes it so easy to pick you," I said softly, and I changed.

* * *

A good half hour full of "Do a pig nose! Do a pig nose!"-type-requests later, I leaned my forehead on the table and moaned: "No more!"

Yusuke and Kuwabara made a 'baaaww' sound, echoing disappointment and defeat, but I had already stolen all the faces in the room and tried out all the hair styles at least once (Kuwabara's hair on Hiei's face was the best by far, at least as far as comedy went). I was so tired I felt like going back to sleep despite having woken up only a few hours earlier, and I could have kissed Genkai when she said: "That's enough for now."

"Oh thank GOD!" I said, flopping backward onto the ground, and that's when I heard a buzzing sound from behind me. When I looked Botan, was pulling a cell phone from her pocket.

"Hello?" she said, adopting the tone most people reserve for talking to their boss on the phone. From that, I deduced she was speaking to Koenma.

"Well, what is it?" Botan asked. "Tell me and I'll tell Genkai and the other..." She paused, going very, very still as she listened. Her next words were short, clipped, and more than a bit frightened. "Oh. Oh, I see. Yes, yes sir. We're all here." Another pause, and then her eyes flicked over to me. "Yes, she is, too."

I froze.

"All right, I will. Goodbye." She flipped the silver phone closed, troubled face alive with worry, and with a nervous swallow she licked her lips.

"Well?" Genkai said.

"Koenma is on his way," Botan said slowly. "He said... he said it's urgent. And Dani..."

"Yeah?" I asked, heart hammering away in my chest.

Botan tried to smile, and though her effort was valiant she still failed. "He said that he needs you here the most," she said, and I went cold.

"Did he say why?" Kurama asked, but Botan shook her head.

"Just that he needed her here. He'll be here in an hour."

"Enough time for a snack," Yusuke said, getting up.

"But we just ate!" Kuwabara said, and then he paused. "What the hell, I could eat. You want to come, Dani?"

I nodded, holding out a hand for the umbrella I had earlier thrown at Yusuke. The room was suddenly stuffy, too stuffy, and I needed to get out, _now_.

The three of us-no one else elected to come along-marched into the kitchen and commenced a raid on the pantry, and we ended up finding something I had not anticipated, and that was a bag of pita bread wheels in the cupboard and a tub of hummus in the fridge.

"I love this stuff," I said, scooping up the dip so I could pop it in my mouth.

"It looks icky," Yusuke said, staring at the golden mush with a skeptical eye.

"Yeah, but it tastes fine," said Kuwabara. "Shizuru eats it all the time, so I've gotten to like it."

"Shizuru?" I asked around a mouthful.

"Oh, my older sister," Kuwabara said. "She's cool. You'll probably meet her sometime."

"Cool? More like scary," Yusuke said. "Remember that time she chased us out of your house with a kitchen knife when we exploded the blender making sake bombs? I couldn't go within ten blocks of your apartment for months without flinching." He reached out, tore off a piece of pita bread, and dunked it in the hummus. "Oh well. Bottoms up." Then he popped it in his mouth and chewed.

Kuwabara and I leaned in close, breath bated.

"Well?" Kuwabara asked as Yusuke chewed his food and eyed the ceiling. "Do you like it?"

Yusuke stared at him, swallowed, and licked his lips.

"That," he deadpanned, "was disgusting." He tore off another hunk of bread, dipped it, and ate it. "Grosser than gross." He ate another bite. "Ugh." Another bite. "You two are sick."

"So's your _mom_," Kuwabara said, reaching for the food. Yusuke promptly grabbed it, resulting in a tug-fight for the stolen deliciousness, and I just sat there and laughed. It wasn't like I was that hungry, anyway. Just... suffocated.

"I'm gonna go get some air," I said, and I stood up.

"Have fun!" Yusuke called, mouth full to bursting as he pushed a struggling Kuwabara away with his foot, and I laughed again before heading out to the porch.

If there's one thing I really liked about the Yu Yu Hakusho world, it was the stars, so much bigger and brighter than the ones in my world had ever been. I once again found myself, as I limped down the steps and into the courtyard, staring up at them in awe, and when I reached the middle of the courtyard I laid down on the cold stone ground. The chill seeped through the back of my shirt and jeans, making me shiver as my skin cooled down, but all I could think about were the stars.

"Maybe Mom and Dad are looking at them now, too," I murmured, and homesickness made my breath catch in my throat. "And Lauren-she goes camping this time of year. I bet we're closer than we think right now."

"Who's Lauren?"

I sat up with a gasp and twisted around, only to find Hiei standing behind me with his hands in his pockets. I collapsed back onto the ground with a huff.

"Oh, it's just you," I said. "You scared me."

He acted like he hadn't heard. "Who's Lauren?"

I held my hand into the air, splaying out my fingers so the stars could peek through. "My best friend ever."

"From your world?"

"Mmm-hmm."

"How long did you know each other?"

I tilted my head back, scalp scraping over stone so I could look at him. "Why the sudden interest?"

I couldn't read his expression because A) it was upside down to me, and B) it was dark outside. But I did see him shrug, and I sighed, letting my head lie flat.

"We met when we were kids. I was unpopular because of my leg, but she didn't care." I paused. "But didn't you see all that in my memories?"

He moved, and then he was sitting beside me. One leg lay straight out, but the other was bent at the knee so he could rest his arm on it, back slightly hunched with head craned toward the sky.

"It's better to hear it from you," he said.

I didn't know what to say.

We sat in silence for a long time, just staring at the stars, and then I felt the earth move. That happens when you stare at the sky while lying down—the stars seemed to spin, you can feel the earth tilt, and it feels like you're about to slide right off the planet and down into oblivion. My hands scrambled for the pavement and I gasped, and I felt something warm close over my fingers. Solidity returned in a rush.

"Sorry about that," I said, tugging my hand away from Hiei as I sat up and put a hand over my face. "The earth moved. Have you ever felt that?"

"Yes."

"Disorienting, huh?" I looked at him, but he was looking at the stars, free hand resting on the stones.

"Yes," he said, and he glanced at me. I found myself unable to look away.

"What do you think Koenma wants?" I heard myself say, and Hiei blinked. The spell, however, did not break.

"The knife has answers," he said softly. "I don't know what he wants with you. And I don't know what you want with him."

The world around us seemed much more invasive just then. I was hyper aware of every hair stirred by the chilly night breeze, of the way the stones and the mortar beneath my hands felt smooth and rough in turn. A night bird sang. A nearby fountained trickled. Hiei's eyes burned like coals in the dark.

"I don't know what you mean," I said hollowly, voice ringing as if through a fog.

"You do," Hiei said, eyes on mine, "and he _won't _win."

"Win what?"

He looked away and I could breathe again, and then he stood up. "I'm not good at losing," he said, turning from me. "I don't know how."

"What are you talking about?"

He began to walk away, hands deep in his pockets, and I scrambled to my hands and knees as I called: "Hiei, wait!"

He stopped and looked at me over his shoulder, but he did not face me. "What?"

I suddenly wanted him there, for him to not leave me alone with only the cold stars for company. It was an odd feeling-I was used to feeling alone, not longing for anybody except for the people I knew I could not have, and the sudden urge for actual company left me speechless. But eventually my tired mine blurted: "You fought Seishou."

_That _made him turn. "Why?" he asked curtly.

I swallowed. "When I was with Ryu, he said that he stole the Book. But Kurama said that Seishou did it. I don't know what's true."

Hiei said nothing for a long time, so I assumed he was not going to answer me. I prepared to ask another question, but as soon as it neared my lips he said: "I fought Seishou. There is no way it was Ryu. But I have no idea who stole the Book."

"But Kurama said," I said, and stopped. A realization dawned. "Kurama said _nothing _to me," I said slowly. "I thought I knew everything, but I guess I just don't know enough about that fight to draw a conclusion." I laughed. "Wow. I'm more ignorant than I thought."

Hiei made no comment, but he did begin to walk toward me. I stared at him, surprised, and fell backward onto my butt when he got too close for comfort. Then he knelt in front of me, eyes intent on my face.

"I can show you," he said in a voice so low I had to strain to hear it, "if you show me."

"Show you what?"

"What happened between you and Ryu at that party."

My knee-jerk reaction was to decline Hiei's offer, and I opened my mouth to do just that. But then the thought of knowing _everything,_ not just bits and infuriating pieces, made me reconsider, and I knew that if I showed my memories to Hiei it would give even more proof to me not working for Seishou and Ryu...

"OK," I said, and he lifted a hand.

The darkness of its shadow consumed me.

The stars disappeared.

* * *

_Running._

_Trees whip past, brushing my cloak behind me with buffets and snarls, but I keep sight on the black mass ahead with unerring eyes. Kurama, to my right, lags behind, but that's to be expected._

_No one is faster than me._

_I am not tired. I do not get tired. I run with steps that do not falter, unlike the two human detectives who stumble along on the ground beneath my path amid the treetops. Our quarry takes my route, too, and I feel my teeth grind together as I realize how fast he is proving to be._

_I run harder._

_I can hear Kurama thinking, the green-and-red tumble of his mind dissecting each and every facet of this chase. There is a river ahead, and a plunge from a cliff to reach it, but he doubts it will buy us much time. Still, he thinks it will be enough to catch us up, and he wills me to pass that message along._

_I send it back to the flare of Yusuke's cobalt energy and Kuwabara's own orange-gold, and I feel their acknowledgment radiating through the link before I sever it._

_Almost there, Kurama's aura says, and then the trees break before us. Flat ground stretches to a sheer drop above white rapids, and at the edge stands my prey._

_Seishou._

_He has his back to me as I launch to stand behind him, and his dismissal is as much an insult as it is a challenge. But he has his hands raised into the air as Kurama comes to stand at my side and the detectives arrive at my back, and Yusuke pushes past me._

_"Giving up?" Yusuke asks, feet squared and shoulders tense. "I'm not a cop, you know, so there's none of that 'hands to the sky' shit. If you wanna fight, be my guest. I've had enough of your pussy running."_

_Seishou does not lower his arms. It looks as if he's reaching out to something._

Be wary, _Kurama says. _He's been on a specific course since we started our pursuit. I assume he wants to be here if he stopped. We're on his terms.

Not likely, _I send back, vicious and battle-ready, and I push Kurama's thoughts away. I begin to step toward Seishou when the air between his arms becomes alight with black fire._

_The four of us skid backward, heels digging into the dirt, and amid the blinding dark there is a shape, a growing shape that is at once simple and complex, dreadful and mundane, and then the darkness pulls back into itself, into the shape that glitters black like unseen stars, and it hovers above Seishou's head with finality and sentience I do not understand._

_The Book, real and unhurried, begins to descend._

_Yusuke and I act as one. With a cry of "Spirit Gun!" he lets loose a volley of light so bright it almost drives back the Book's shadowed aura, and I follow close on its heels. The blast strikes Seishou in the back, pitching him forward with a stagger, and then I am there to stab him through the chest with my sword, which is alive and kicking in my hands. I feel the strike of metal on flesh, see red blood pour over my hands, and then I jerk the sword back._

_Seishou turns as he falls over the precipice. One baleful golden eye glares through his metal mask, connecting with mine in fury and in hate, and then he is falling into the water, black hair streaming up in a riot of silk and shadow._

_I do not see him hit the water. He vanishes before he gets there._

_"He got away," I say, and I walk away, leaving Kurama to deal with the Book._

_"Hiei, wait!" I hear Yusuke call, but I am gone._

_I do not lose with grace._

* * *

I came out of the memory gasping, seeing Hiei standing over me with expressionless eyes, and as I tried to recover being Hiei, actually _being _Hiei for what felt like hours, he walked away.

"Wait!" I managed to choke out. "W, wait!"

But he did not reply, and I was left wondering.

What the hell was up with _him_?

* * *

I didn't go inside until Botan came to fetch me, and Koenma was in the fireplace room before I was. He had taken up a seat next to Genkai, and when I retook my own seat we made solemn eye contact.

"Genkai explained what happened," Koenma said, but for once I wasn't looking at him—I was glancing at Hiei out of the corner of my eye as he leaned against the fireplace, and he was staring at the floor like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Kurama noticed, of course, and raised an eyebrow at me when my eyes swept over him, but I just smiled and did not look at Hiei again.

Koenma's words were well-rehearsed. "Though I am not pleased to hear of your deceit, I see the reasons behind it. Thus, you will be trained further in your abilities, which you will use to help us apprehend Ryu and Seishou." He cleared his throat. "Which brings me to the reason for my visit."

I thought I heard Genkai mutter something that sounded like "finally," but I can't be sure.

"Botan said you wanted me here," I said, hesitant. "Like, me especially. Why?"

His mouth worked around unspoken words, and he breathed deeply before exhaling. "I will make this a quick as possible," he said, and looked at me.

I stared back at him, unsure of what he was looking for, but apparently he found it because he didn't pause for very long.

"I... had the knife's energy signature analyzed in the Spirit World, as I promised," he said. "It's a dimension-cutter with very specific coordinates."

"Oh-kaaaay," I said.

"Yeah, get to the point," Yusuke said.

"Give me a minute," Koenma snapped. "Once we found out where the knife led, we investigated it." His gaze was steady. "The results concern you, Dani. More than anyone else."

I shook my head, looking at everyone in confusion. "I, I don't know what you mean," I stammered, but I had a theory—one which scared me more than I could say—that threatened to tear my world apart. "You can't really think—"

"I can, and I do," said Koenma. We shared a look that said much more than any mere words could, and we did not break our silence until Yusuke made it necessary.

"What's going on?" he griped. "C'mon, _you_ both know, but fill the rest of us in already."

"Dani, what's Koenma talking about?" Kuwabara said. He was standing behind Koenma and looming over him like some sort of confused statue. "I don't like this secretive business you two've got going."

"Koenma, please tell me it isn't true," I said. My voice shook. "Please don't be thinking what I think you're thinking, because my life is upside down enough as it is without this little revelation to complicate matters."

"I wish I could do that for you Dani," he replied. "I really do. But I can't. You know I can't." There was real sorrow in his gaze, one which hurt me almost as much as the impending doom did.

"Spill it already," Genkai snapped, and Koenma did.

"The knife leads to the westernmost part of Demon World," Koenma said in a voice that rang like a funeral bell. "It leads to a broken land covered in rubble and whirlpools. You all know its name."

"America," I breathed, and I think I fainted.

* * *

I woke up, predictably, in my futon in my room. The lights were on, the umbrella was at my side, and so was a long package wrapped in brown paper and string.

My head swum a little as I sat up, pushed away the covers, and squinted at the package. With shaking fingers I pulled the object into my lap and tugged ineffectively at the string, and when it finally fell apart in my hands I let the object within the paper roll itself out and across my knees.

It was a cane made of white wood, one that tapered to a point at one end and had a molded grip and a leather tie on the other. Near the grip was a seam, and with a frown I grabbed the cane in the middle and tugged at the handle. The pieces came apart with a little effort, and from the handle came a length of sharpened metal that was as long as my forearm and a thick as an Emory board. The blade glimmered in the light like water made solid—a blade of ice so cold it burned—and around the thickest part of the sword was a piece of pale paper.

I pulled it off, and the scroll kept rolling in on itself. I set the cane aside and held the top and bottom in my hands so I could read.

_I meant to give you this earlier. Try not to faint so much._

_Ryu is in the Demon World, in America with his allies. You will accompany the others to the site in five days, where you will attempt to apprehend Ryu and take him back here for questioning. _

_Normally I would not send a civilian (even one as interesting as yourself) into battle. But you know the secrets of America, and that may prove to be the deciding factor of this mission's victory. _

_Listen to the others and try to keep out of trouble. They will keep you safe._

It was signed with a red stamp: "Koenma."

The memory of my conversation with Koenma came back about halfway through the note, and when it did the paper slipped from my fingers. My sweat smeared the ink, and when I was through I crumpled the note into a little ball and threw it, hard, into the corner behind my rocking horse. But then I scrambled for it and read it a second time, back against the wall as I tried not to think of how seeing my home as a decimated rubble would feel to me, and I stared at my new cane like a snake waiting to strike. Eventually, though, I crawled back to my bed and put the knife into its sheath, and when I moved to switch off the light I felt my eyes prick with tears.

But I did not cry. I crawled back to my bed in the dark, dry eyed with my jaw clenched and my lips pressed into a thin white line, and I said into the dark: "Well, that wasn't what I was expecting."

I thought about my day as I tried to go to sleep. What Koenma had said, reliving the memories Hiei had shown me... Why had he been so mad at me, anyway?

I didn't remember Ryu's kiss until sleep was stealing my mind away.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Well. Lots of talking. Lots of randomness. I feel weird, coming up with a chapter like this after so much action, but more action starts up soon, trust me. I mean, they're going to America, after all. ROAD TRIP. HOO-RAH._

_Dani's American know-how might come in handy on this new mission. Or, it might not. OH NO, WHAT WILL HAPPEN?_

_Gratuitous Hiei moment! Also, gratuitous Hiei POV! Ah, yes, he finally gets some more screen time._

_Dani dissects Hiei's memories next chapter, and she draws conclusions from them that shed light on the "Who Stole the Book" dilemma. Didn't want you to think I had forgotten. ^^_

_So... yeah. I don't really have much to say at this point. XD Just a big ol' THANK YE KINDLY to all my reviewers, because I love them so: Blaze1662001, Dyani91, Koryu Elric, Sarah Jackson - The Other, AkaMizu-Chan, chocolateluvr13, WickedLovelyDream, j.d.y., ilovemusicrox12, ichixichigo, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, dumbrat, ShadowFireFox13, Ry171819, Kaiya's Watergarden, Rokkugoh, colbub, dude where's my spirit gun, DoilyRox, LadyoftheGags, Masuyo Shun, overfreshh, Wolf-Cry-Night, Kai-Chan94, American Senpai, blackangelxvikkix, .peRFecT, Reclun, Foxgirl Ray, Pirazz, 0nfateswings, rain chant, and Turtle Kid!_


	34. Chapter 34: Changes

Future Talk

Chapter 34:

"Changes"

* * *

Yukina woke me up the next morning, saying: "You can't sleep 'til the afternoon again, Dani. We have to get your rhythm back."

I hid my head under the covers and moaned at her, but she was relentless. Really, she and Hiei just wouldn't give up when they wanted something, would they? That similarity had never been more apparent until she ripped the covers off my back and cold air rushed down to meet my skin with chilly kisses.

"All right, I'm up!" I said, sitting up with a scowl. I blinked owlishly in the light, then yawned and stretched. In the process, I smelled myself. "Dude, I need a bath."

The warmth of her smile made me smile back. "It's open now, if you'd like to take one."

"Don't mind if I do!" I said, and I bounced to my feet. I hesitated over which cane to use—the umbrella or the new one? The new one just looked so pure and white...

"The umbrella is waterproof, if you'd like to save the white one for your trip," Yukina suggested when she saw me hesitate, and I grinned before taking that advice in stride and picking up the umbrella. Then it struck me that she _knew_ I had the new white cane at my disposal, and I froze with my fingers barely touching it so I could look at her with 'Wait, what _happened_ when I was out?' written all over my face.

She got the message. "Koenma-san was going to give you that before he left," Yukina said. "He noticed you were using a secondhand one—"

_How kind of him,_ I thought.

"—and that the new one should afford you some protection in Demon World."

_Or is he just self serving? _"In America, you mean," I said.

Her eyes seemed a bit more icy than usual. "It's been there so long, I think it's more a part of Demon World now. Don't you?"

I didn't know what to say, so I just said: "Point taken."

We parted ways then, and I gathered up my things so I could go take a bath. Someone had returned my hotel bag to my room during the night, probably when I was passed out, and since it had most of my clean clothes and all of my bath stuff inside, I just grabbed it and slung it over my shoulder. I unpacked next to the showers in the empty bathroom, undressed, and washed away two day's worth of grime with all the zeal of a priest in the middle of a purification ritual.

And it was a purification ritual, of sorts. All the grime from the hotel, from sitting in the muddy flowerbeds to hide from Ryu and the touch of that man's lips on mine, seemed to swirl down the drain along with all the dirt, leaving me feeling refreshed in more than just a physical way. I even felt playful enough, at one point, to open the umbrella over my head and point the shower head above me, and then I twirled the umbrella so thousands of pearly drops splattered the walls like rain.

That mood passed quickly. Soon I climbed into the huge bath and just sat there, knees drawn up to my chin as I stared moodily at the hot water and steam.

And as I stared, I thought.

Hiei's memories took center stage at that point. I decided to focus on what I knew, then add it all together to draw conclusions. It seemed like a solid enough plan. With a sigh I arranged all the parts of information in my head, readying them for logic-math. I knew three things for sure.

One: I knew, from Ryu and Seishou both, that Ryu had used his ghost to get the Book out of Spirit World.

Two: Ryu said that he lost track of the Book while he was a bodiless (and invisible) spirit.

Three: I knew, from Hiei's memories, that Seishou had somehow intercepted the Book when it first got to the Human World.

Now for the addition. If I went linearly, I was looking at a timeline like this: Ryu stole the Book, but when the Book resisted being moved he had to abandon it in order to find his body. However, he had coordinated with Seishou ahead of time so a situation like that wasn't the end of the world. This being the case, Seishou tracked the progress of Ryu's spirit across the physical Human World as a kind of safeguard. However, the detectives were following Seishou, which made his efforts of getting the Book when Ryu lost it futile.

I mean, it all made sense like that. To an outside observer who did not know Ryu had stolen the Book, it would have looked like Seishou summoned it from Spirit World out of thin air, so the assumption that Seishou had been the one to steal...

"No wonder they didn't expect Seishou to have allies," I murmured as I leaned back into the water's hot embrace. Steam made my pores gape open. "It totally looked like he was flying solo."

I got out of the warm water pretty quickly, not wanting to be alone all of a sudden, and I got dressed and applied some makeup without speaking. Then I shoved my things back into my duffel bag and shook out the umbrella's excess water. It speckled my calves—bare beneath the hem on my denim shorts—with cold drops, and I felt myself shiver as I left to put my things in my room. The warmth from the hot bath hadn't lasted long.

"A good breakfast will get me going," I thought as I pulled a light sweatshirt over my tanktop and left my room behind. "I wonder what Yukina made today?"

A nice warm meal, however, was just not meant to be.

* * *

As soon as I walked into the kitchen, Genkai started riding my ass. "Where have you been?" she snapped as I stepped inside. Her mug of tea skittered across the table as she stood up. "Your training was to begin today, effective immediately!"

I gaped at her, hesitated, then walked over to the table. The remains of breakfast greeted me, and I snagged the only steamed bun left off a mostly empty plate. "I took a shower," I mumbled, and I bit into the bun.

Genkai's eye twitched. "Follow me. Now."

"Mmph... can I get some milk?" I said, voice muffled around the thick bread and sweet bean paste in my mouth.

"No, you can't," said Genkai. She stalked past me and into the hallway. "Follow. Now."

I bit into the rest of my bun and held it in my mouth as I went after her, the tip of my new white cane click-click-clicking over the wooden floor like gunshot. "Where... going?" I said around the bun between my teeth.

She didn't respond as she went outside onto the porch, down the steps, and toward the hundreds of stairs that went to the highway. I groaned as we started down them, and then a harsh breeze blew by. A cold snap had come during the night, and the chilly wind stung the skin on my legs like sandpaper. I was only wearing sandals, too, and I wished for my tennis shoes with futile and fading hope.

"It got cold," I said, taking the bun out of my mouth so I could breathe as we descended the steps.

"Good. That'll teach you better than to leave at the last minute without the proper clothes," Genkai said. "Now shut up and walk. You of all people need to conserve your energy."

I didn't reply to that, but I didn't do as she asked, either. I spent effort on eating the rest of my stolen breakfast, and I managed to choke back the last gooey bite just as we reached the highway.

The highway was on a cliff overlooking a gorgeous bowl of sunny valley (in which ran sparkling rivers and fluffy forests, and off in the distance rose a few plumes of smoke that marked the village of Sakana), so when Genkai crossed the road to stand on the median on the other side of it, I was more than a little trepidatious of the height beyond. But she looked fearless as she hopped over the metal guard rail and motioned for me to come over, and when I did I saw her sliding down a steep grassy slope at high speed.

"You can't really expect me to do that, can you?" I called to her. The slope was barely eighty degrees in angle—and that was almost ninety, which is straight up vertical, dammit!

Her brown eyes glared in the sun overhead, and she stared up at me with a fierce expression. Around her was a small terrace-like cliff covered in wildflowers.

"I do, and you will," she said. "Slide and brace with your good foot. I'll assist if you need it, which you won't."

"Very reassuring," I grumbled as I crawled over the metal guardrail. It felt cold and gritty beneath my hands, and I leaned my back against it as I tried to sit down at the top of the slope. I took a deep breath before sliding forward; the grass was glossy and smooth, and it tickled the backs of my thighs before I pushed off, and then I was basically falling.

I'm not too sure what happened. One minute I was falling, the next I was in an aching heap on solid ground. Luckily, the foot-high wildflowers cushioned my fall with sweet blue blossoms that smelled like sunshine and warmth despite the cooing weather. I sprawled out, spreadeagled, and then Genkai's shadow obscured the sunlight falling on my face.

"Get up," she said. "We have work to do."

I sat up as she asked, and I found myself sitting on a crescent moon of land about fifty feet long and twenty feet wide at its widest point. Thirty feet below our slice was another slice of wildflower laden land, and thirty feet below that was another, and so on until it reached a bank of pointy evergreens on the valley's floor. We were on one of the smallest crescents; they got bigger the farther you descended.

"We're not going all the way down there, are we?" I asked dubiously, I peering over the edge. I pulled back as my nerves kicked up, and Genkai snorted as she sat down with her feet dangling over the edge. The she disappeared up to her waist in the flowers.

"Not willingly," she said. "There are things I want to teach you, and we need open space to do them."

I smiled, sitting crosslegged a few feet behind Genkai. When I leaned my elbows on my knees, flowers tickled my chin. "Well, we certainly have that here." The open air in front of us was expansive, to say the least. We were hundreds of feet above the forest below. "So what're we doing?"

She looked at me over her shoulder. "Sit next to me."

I swallowed. "Like... over the edge like that?"

"What does it look like?"

"Oh... OK," I said, and I scooted inch by inch to sit beside her. I was lucky I had put one my velcro strap sandals that morning instead of flipflops, even if they weren't as warm as sneakers.

"Which of your six senses," Genkai began, "would you say is the basis for shapeshifting?"

"Six?" I asked. "I thought there were five."

"Count your mind as the sixth," she said. "Now choose."

I thought about it. "Well, I guess I'd have to say that since my thoughts are what drive the change, the answer is my mind."

But Genkai shook her head. "The answer is sight," she said. "You build an image in your head, copy it, and shapeshift. But without that image, there would be no shifting. Your greatest asset here is your eyes."

"So... you're going to teach me to see better?" I ventured, ad she smirked as her hair whipped around her face. Strands sparked pink in the sun.

"I knew a man, once," she said, "who could copy anything at will."

My heart leaped into my mouth. Was she going to tell me I had a true shape-shifter to teach me? The thought was an exciting one, one I had not counted on, and—

"People, animals, objects... he could be anything an everything he wanted. I don't think I ever saw his true face." She paused. "Once, I asked him how he managed to copy things so well. 'Memory,' he told me. 'Everything I see, I remember.' Then he said that when he recalled those images, it was like he could reach out and touch them if he wanted to." She chuckled, the sound reverberating deep in her throat. "He tried it, too. Ended up falling to his death, reaching for something that wasn't there."

"That's awful," I whispered.

"Stupid, not awful," she corrected. "But his death should teach you an important lesson, Dani, and that's that his abilities were only as strong as his _memory_."

I laughed. "So are you going to ask me how many trees are in the valley or something?"

She was not amused. "Since his memory was so important," she went on, voice bathed in acid, "if he could not remember a person's smallest flaws and imperfections, he was unable to effectively become them."

"But," I began, wanting to tell her that I usually just looked at a person nearby to copy them, but she did not let me finish.

"Hiei told me that you've been practicing the actual act of shapeshifting on your own," she said, "but that you haven't been exercising anything else. You lack focus and technique, and that could prove the difference between a shift's success, or its failure."

"So what are we going to do?" I asked.

She shot me a sharp look. "I'm not _finished_," she said. "When my old friend trained, he did not merely practice shapeshifting like you do. That came second to another skill, because once he mastered the _how_ of shapeshifting, all that was left was the stepping stones to get there." She shot me a look out of the corner of her eye. "You said yourself that once you shift, keeping the results is effortless. This is the same concept. Since you have learned how to shapeshift, all you need to do now is learn the auxiliary functions of your power. You need to perfect the things that allow you to shapeshift, not the shifting itself."

"That went way over my head," I said.

She sighed. "Fine. I'll drum up a metaphor for you, dimwit."

"No need to get snippy," I muttered, pride stinging, but Genkai just ignored me.

"Architects," Genkai said, "can plan out an entire city on a piece of paper. They can calculate weight distribution and key stones, and the way the lines all flow into each other. However, even though the architect knows what will happen once he builds his city, he does not necessarily know what goes into making the bricks that build his foundation."

She looked at me, expecting me to have a revelation of some kind, but I just smiled in a please-don't-shoot-me kind of way.

"Right now, you're that young architect," Genkai said in a tired voice. "You know what will happen and you know how to make it happen, but you don't know shit about the stones that will hold your empire up. You lack the proper foundation."

"So you're saying that I need to forget about practicing shapeshifting," I said slowly, "in order to practice the things that will help me make better shifts in the long run?"

Genkai nodded. "Yes. You know your destination, but you've been taking shortcuts to get there. Learn about what you've been skipping, Dani. It's time for you to actually realize what you're doing when you're doing it."

"And I'll get there... how?"

"Through concentration," Genkai said, and I just stared at her. She sighed.

"Are you really this stupid?"

"Seems so," I said.

She told me: "Concentration, when used practically and in situations besides working or reading or whatever, is the ability to build an image, sound, or state of _being_ so complete that no one can disrupt it. You block outside focus to create something unshakeable."

"But that sounds like mediation," I protested. "You already taught me that, so I—"

"Meditation is internal concentration," Genkai said patiently. "Shapeshifting is an _external_ manifestation of intense concentration, concentration that builds an image that you believe in with all your mind, and you need to be better at it because your shifts aren't very solid."

"Hey, I fooled those guards and I pretty much fooled the boys," I said, but she cut me off again.

"You've been winging it," Genkai said. "You just focus on the overall package, ignoring the details in favor of the big picture. There wasn't true concentration, not the kind that affects the physical world like a true shape-shifter's could. I could tell you weren't Botan when you tried to be her last night—maybe it was more convincing when you soul-dived, but I didn't see that so I don't know." She took a deep breath. "I will teach you to externally manifest concentration, and I will do that by teaching you to craft illusion."

"Illusion?" I asked, flabbergasted. "But how will that help me—"

She said: "It is possible to concentrate on a fleshed-out image so intensely that it becomes real. It's more than a mere mirage: it's an actual physical object controlled by your consciousness and the level of its concentration. If you master these solidified illusions, you will be able to create perfect shapeshifts." She smiled. "And crafting something solid from an illusion could held you fight, too."

"I'm... not sure that I'm getting it," I said, and she smirked.

"Words never could explain something like this," she said. "The only means is through example. Watch."

Then Genkai made the world explode.

I can describe what she did, but I don't know if it will do any good. One second she was staring at the empty air in front of her, and the next the air was buckling in on itself, twisting and turning and roiling like a heatwave trapped in a translucent sphere before the psychic's eyes, and then in the middle of the hot-air-sphere was a spark of something I could not name, and it all imploded with a light like a small sun. Then the air ahead of her was filled with stars, the formations of which I recognized in a vague way, and I was staring at it with my mouth open when she said: "The night sky."

I looked at her. She was not staring at the sky like I expected, but instead she looked right at me.

"It's ingrained in my head," she said, "so it's easy to make. You just project the vision out with a burst of power. Take the image and move it _out_. It feels like it will tear, but it won't. Back down and it will fade."

I looked back at the night sky in front of us. It was like someone had dropped a curtain in front of me, one patterned with living lights, and I reached out a hand to touch it. The darkness enveloped my fingers in surprising warmth, and I pulled back with a gasp. The sky faded away.

"Skies are easy," Genkai said as I stared at the empty space before us. "No one really knows what it will feel like, so I don't have to conform it to the viewer's expectations. Objects you mean to share with others are harder." She lifted a hand, held her fingers open, and then there was another heat-sphere. When it burst, there was a comb lying on her palm.

"A comb," I said as she pulled it through her hair twice, and then she ran the comb's tines down my arm. They were cold and felt like metal.

It disappeared in a moment I somehow missed.

"What color was it?"

I jolted out of whatever funk I had been in. "What?"

"I said, what color was the comb?" Genkai asked, and I gaped at her. "You don't remember because there _was_ no color. I didn't give it one. Your mind filled in the missing bits."

"But, how..."

"That's the beauty of illusion," she said. "Minds will fill in whatever they think should be there. It's a phenomenon documented by scientists all over the world. Illusion makes use of that phenomenon almost exclusively."

"So what you're saying," I said, "is that that comb wasn't real?"

She nodded.

"My brain saw it and just assumed it was real, so therefore I could feel it on my skin?"

"Yes," said Genkai. "Illusion is all about belief. If the object's presence seems plausible, people will fall for it and _make_ it real. Otherwise, you're the only one the illusions can interact with."

"What else can you tell me?"

Her smirk made me feel hollow. "Nothing. Discover the rest for yourself." The psychic stood up, folded her hands behind her back, and turned away.

"Where are we going now?" I asked as I scrambled after, and in confusion I watched her walk up to the slope leading back to the highway above.

She turned her head enough to look at me out of one jaundiced eye. "We?" she asked, and then she was levitating.

My jaw dropped.

I'd realize what she had done later, but right then I could only watch in disbelief as bricks materialized beneath her feet, forming a steep staircase that stuck straight out of the slope. She ascended the brick stairs like a mountain goat, and before I knew it she was gone. To my sheer astonishment, all the bricks vanished after she touched them.

Her voice floated down to me. "Don't even think about calling for help," she said, and was that a touch of vindictive pleasure in her voice? "This is your training. You'll come back to the temple only after you master solid illusions. You have to find a way back up on your own."

"But Genkai!" I screeched in disbelief. "It's _cold_ down here!"

She did not, to my eternal horror, answer.

* * *

I started small, of course—I tried to conjure up a toothbrush. But I couldn't remember if my toothbrush at the temple had green bristles or blue, so I kept getting caught up on the details and missing the boat completely.

I switched to a hairbrush. Then I tried my shoes. I was able to create nothing.

Eventually I managed to get a pretty good picture of the rocking horse back in my room—chipped paint and all—but when I tried to force the image out of myself I felt like it would _tear_ or something, like the doorway out of my mind was too small for a concrete image to pass through.

"I wish I was an artist instead of a musician," I moaned to myself as I lay back on a wildflower carpet. "Then maybe my images wouldn't break every time I tried to move them."

The worst part of the thing was the transfer from 2D to 3D, and I know what you're thinking—"Wait, what?" It's just that my thoughts were very 2D; I could see the face of an object, but as I pulled it out of myself the vision tried to enter the 3D world, and my visions were just not strong enough to support the sudden influx of angles, shadows, and weight that a true object would have.

So in the end, I just decided to give up.

I didn't lapse in my training completely, however. No, despite Genkai's instructions to ignore pure shifting practice for the time being, I fooled around with various body modifications. I stretched and grew my limbs (hello, midget-me!), rearranged my face (it was hard without a mirror), and attempted to straighten out my stunted toes (which failed horribly and gave me an awful headache).

I did managed to do something cool, though. I figured out how to stretch my left arm all the way to the ground, and I was able to actually use that arm as a sort of cane to get around on. But the altered arm tired easily, so I experimented with bulking out my muscle mass to remedy the problem. Only, the limb looked so huge and deformed that I seemed like some sort of weird monster out of Resident Evil, and even though the situation was more handy than a cane, I didn't fancy using it full time.

Frankly, I looked like a hunchback, and my vanity was not going to take that lying down.

* * *

Yusuke came to visit around noon. I was lying on my back, staring at the clouds when he poked his head over the drop down to my level, and when our eyes met I smirked.

"Come to gawk at the prisoner?" I asked lightly.

He snorted. "Nah—well, maybe a little. Just checking on you. You doing OK?"

"As OK as I can be without a toilet."

Yusuke winced. "Damn. The old lady's harsh, huh?"

"Very." I smiled a bit, but since the sun was overhead I just ended up squinting. "Want to help me out?"

"And get killed by Genkai at first opportunity?" Yusuke said. "No thanks. You're on your own." I sensed the question before he asked it. "What are you doing down there, anyway?"

He pulled his head out of sight as I spoke, but I knew he was there because he tripped over something and cursed. "Illusions," I said to the invisible Yusuke.

"Wow, really? That sounds cool."

"Yeah, and awful." I laughed out loud. "I have to take a 2D mental image, make it hefty enough to be able to transfer into 3D, and then I have to force it out of my mind without breaking it."

"Doesn't sound too hard to me."

"Oh, it is, and I'm not helping matters at all."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

I sighed dramatically. "This is all about mental images, so being visually inclined would be a major help right now. And it's just that I'm not a visual person at all, which makes this really, really hard."

Yusuke was silent for a moment. Then he said: "So what kind of person _are_ you?"

"A music person," I said.

"Then why not use music?"

I laughed again. "Images, remember? Illusion is all about images."

But Yusuke wasn't buying it. "I dunno. The old lady has never been good about straightforwardness and shit. She's all about looking beyond the obvious and stuff—strategy. She's so good at riddles it's criminal. She calls it 'lateral thinking,' whatever that is."

I did not reply.

"Hey," said Yusuke, "I don't know much about this stuff, but why not use music? Like, if you wanna make an illusion of... oh, I dunno running shoes? Well, couldn't you use fast music or something? Like to mimic running, use a bunch of fast... I dunno."

"No, it's a good idea," I reassured him when he trailed off. "It's just... well, I don't know if it would work. Genkai was pretty specific with the images thing."

"Eh. Worth a shot, but hey, whatever works." I heard some rustling from overhead, and then Yusuke was looking at me again. "Well, I'm gonna go. Someone else'll be by to check up on you soon."

I waved; so did Yusuke. "Maybe tell them to bring me some food?" I called when he ducked out of sight.

He yelled "Will do!" before running off to parts unknown.

However, his other words—_she's all about looking beyond the obvious,_ and, _then why not use music?_—stayed behind in his place.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Rule of thumb for the 'solid' illusions: they're real until proven not real. Like innocent until proven guilty, only with personal realities. Ooh boy, I'm getting metaphysical on your asses._

_I'm sorry if some of this made you go "WTF?" in a bad way. I have a horrible case of fever; doctor's appointment tomorrow will hopefully help, but for the past week I've been pretty much delirious. Also, another apology for the length, but I can't really help it. =[ Can I promise to make next week longer, with a Hiei moment? Because I have a great one planned._

_Next Tuesday (the 7th) is actually a travel day for me. Travel to where, you ask? Why, college, of course! Don't worry though, your chapter will be posted late Monday night (or is that early Tuesday morning if it's 1 AM or something?). I shall not skip chapters in the name of school, no sir!_

_On that note: School. I will not slack off because of it. Frankly, I have so much fun writing this that I KNOW I would be less happy would I were unable to fanfic. Yes, I did just use fanfic as a verb. Tuesday updates will continue as they always have because they keep me sane. Boo-yah. _

_LOVE YOU GUYS TO PIECES! Kai-Chan94, Rokkugoh, 9shadowcat9, Reclun, 0nfateswings, dumbrat, dude where's my spirit gun, WickedLovelyDream, Cocoasit, Out-Of-Control-Athoress, HitsugayaFanGirl, American Senpai, AkaMizu-chan, Doilyrox, Kaiya's Watergarden, ShadowFireFox13, XAudra RoseX, rain chant, Foxgirl Ray, EchoesXGrace, ilovemusicrox12, chocolateluvr13, Turtle Kid, colbub, LadyoftheGags, j.d.y., Lissa's Guardian, ichixichigo, heve-chan, wolf-Cry-Night, Archangel fighter, Koryu Elric! _


	35. Chapter 35: Free Fallin'

Future Talk

Chapter 35:

"Free Fallin'"

* * *

Lauren looked at the mess in the blender with noticeable disgust. The glass in her hand held some on the same pale pink sludge as the blender's pitcher, and her upper lip had a smear of it, too. She looked like she had tried to put on cheap lipgloss and missed.

"I told you I didn't want bananas in my smoothie," she said, and she shoved the glass back at me.

I took it from her as my jaw dropped. "You can't even taste the banana!" I said. The cup was cold beneath against my palm.

"I can."

"There's strawberry, peach, blackberry, and only _one_ banana. How the hell can you taste it?" I asked. "It's as diluted as it can get!"

She shrugged as I poured the rest of her untouched smoothie back into the blender. "It just tastes so green. And not the good kind of green—it tastes like chartreuse. Char-freaking-treuse. And I hate that color, especially the way it tastes."

"Bananas are yellow you idiot," I told her, but she shook her head and smirked.

"Not to me. Tastes have color, remember? It's because my sensory nerves all—"

"Intermesh, yeah, I know." I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, please don't give me another lecture on your weird little… what was it called again? Syn, syn something…"

"Syn-uh—" she began.

"Dani!" said Kuwabara, and I looked up to find Kuwabara floating above us. He was dressed from the neck down in a giant banana costume, face as red as an apple in consternation. For the first time I noticed that Lauren and I had been making smoothies in a spaceship, and that the smoothie was flying out of the cup and spiraling into the air like lava from a volcano. "Dani! Stop!"

I looked back to Lauren as the flying smoothie turned the setting around us into a real volcano, on the lip of which we stood. "What was is called?" I asked, desperate for reasons I didn't know, and she leered at me happily as the lava in the pit nearby burned my face. "Syn something!"

"Syn-uh, syn-uh, syn-uh-BON!" Lauren said, and when I looked at her she was wearing a giant cinnamon roll for a hat. As I watched, the layers of the roll uncoiled and envelope her, and then her head stuck out of the top as she began to dance a can-can. "Cinnabon, the most lovely sweet in the whole wide world! Eat one today!"

"You quit working at that kiosk last summer, you big jerk!" I screamed at her, and Lauren jumped into a giant pool of frosting and sprinkles—there was no lava in the volcano anymore, only delicious candy—that splattered me from head to toe, and suddenly I was on the ground and rolling to get away from the sticking stuff—

"Dani!" Kuwabara yelled. "STOP!"

I awoke just as the weird dream starting getting even more silly, and when I opened my eyes I found myself staring up at Kuwabara, who was leaning over the edge of the cliff above me in horror. I waved at him, stupefied with sleep, and put my hands onto the ground by my hips so I could sit up.

My right hand hit the ground. My left hand went pitching off into space, and my stomach jerked as I lurched toward the empty air… I screamed and threw myself away from the drop-off I had been inches away from tumbling over. I panted as I lay on the ground, trying my hardest not to pee my pants. My hands twined into the wildflowers for dear life.

"Dani, are you OK?" Kuwabara yelled, and I waved at him weakly.

"No, but I will be," I said, trying not to sound like I had just had the shit scared out of me. Which I had. "Holy crap. I mean, _holy_ _crap_! Why the hell did I think it was OK to take a nap up here?"

"You were rolling around in your sleep, talking about fruit," Kuwabara said. "Oh man, I'm lucky I came along when I did. One more roll and you were in a free fall straight to the Spirit World!"

I would have laughed had his words not sparked something in my head. I frowned. "Roll… now why does that sound familiar?"

He scratched his chin, thinking hard. "You said that word a lot while you were asleep," Kuwabara said, obviously trying to be helpful, "but it was in a bunch of English words so I don't know what you were talking about. Is 'roll' important?"

"No, 'roll' wasn't the important bit, it was…" I trailed off, unable to remember anything. "Shoot. And for some reason I feel like I need to remember that."

"Eh, it'll come to you if you really need it," he said, and then he dangled a large package wrapped in a red kerchief over the cliff's edge. "But that's not important because I have _food_!"

As soon as he said it I realized just how hungry I was. It was well past noon, after all, and when Kuwabara tossed the package down to me I tore at the cloth binding it with chilled fingers. It took a while, but soon I was able to see a plastic carton filled with rice balls. They tasted like absolute ambrosia despite being so simple.

"Here," Kuwabara said as he watched me scarf down and subsequently choke on my third _onigiri_, and he threw down a bottle of straight green tea. "Genkai didn't have any honey in the house; I asked, because her tea is always so bitter."

"She needs to stock up," I said, grimacing as I swallowed the tea. "That was kind of gross."

"Better than nothing," Kuwabara admonished, and I sighed as I recapped the bottle.

"You're right." I flopped back into the wildflower cushion, bottle rolling from my fingers to join the empty rice box. "Although that's pretty much what I have right now—nothing."

Kuwabara—who had been leaning over the edge of the cliff to look at me—pulled out of sight. "Genkai wouldn't tell me why you're down there, so I don't know what you mean. Sorry."

My brow furrowed. "Did she not tell anybody?"

"Nope. Well, Yusuke came down earlier, so _he_ knows, but _I_ don't and I haven't seen anybody but Yukina all day, and _she_ didn't know, so…"

"So it's just me," I said. I didn't know if I was grateful for the privacy of weathering this task on my own, or angry that Genkai was treating me like some sort of pariah, but in the end I supposed it hardly mattered. I didn't pursue it.

"It doesn't have to be," said Kuwabara. "Wanna talk about it?"

I heaved out a rather dramatic sigh, but I didn't answer.

"I mean, why the heck are you stuck down there, anyway?" Kuwabara said. "How did you even _get_ down there?"

"I slid," I said. "And Genkai told me that I can't come back up until I can do it on my own."

He paused, considered this, and said: "Does she want you to shift into a cat or something?"

I snorted, shifting on my bed of flowers as a sprig of them began to dig into my spine. "I wish. She wants me to make an illusion."

"A what?"

"An illusion," I repeated.

"Yeah, I got that part—but how is that supposed to help?"

I opened my mouth, closed it, and opened it again. "What do you mean?"

I heard him move around before he spoke. "Aren't illusions just pictures and stuff? Like, not solid? How's that gonna get you over a wall that's thirty feet straight up?"

I sighed again. "Good point. But the thing Genkai wants me to do isn't an illusion like _that_. But since 'illusion' was the word she kept using I just used it, too. It's just… complicated, I guess."

"I can handle it. C'mon, explain."

I didn't waste time on flowery junk, instead skipping straight to: "If I can make an illusion convincing enough, people can trick themselves into believing that it's actually real. Same applies to me."

"And Genkai wants you to make a staircase or something?" Kuwabara guessed, and I sighed yet again.

"Bingo. It's just that I'm having a hell of a time doing it. I have to visualize every single detail of the illusion in my head, but then I have to push it out of me and into the 3D world. None of my images are strong enough to take the weight of the transition."

"Ouch. Sounds awful."

"It is. I'm not a visual person—I'm better with music. Yusuke told me to play to my strengths, not that I know how to do that."

Kuwabara grunted. I could imagine him lying on the ground above me, probably with his arms behind his head as he stared up at the afternoon sky. "I think he's right. That's about all I can tell you, though."

Neither of us spoke for a few minutes. I listened to the wind and felt the way the flowers around me brushed against my skin, and the sun overhead beat out most of the rising cold. Really, the strength of the coldfront from the night before was obscene. How could the weather change so much in so little time?

"Got any riceballs left?" Kuwabara asked.

I sat up with a grunt and looked at the box lying at my side. The lid was sitting on top of it, though it was loose since I hadn't bothered to push it down into place, and when I flicked the box the lid slid far enough off for me to see three _onigiri_ lying serenely at the bottom. "Yeah," I said, and I wrapped one of them in the red bandana so I could throw it over the ledge above me. "Incoming! HIT THE DECK!" I heard it hit something (the smack was followed by a muffled yelp) so I called: "You get that?"

"Right in my crotch," Kuwabara grumbled in a high pitch than normal, and then his hand darted over the cliff. The red bandana fluttered right into my lap. "Toss up another, but be_ careful_."

"'Kay," I said, and I did so. "There's one more—do you want it, or can I have it?"

"You c'n 'ave it," Kuwabara said through a full mouth, and I bit into the last one.

Yukina had done a good job with the onigiri—that much was obvious. They were expertly shaped, wrapped with precisely the right amount of seaweed, and they had a dusting of salt that was even, thin, but not _too_ thin all at once. The amount of rice stood at a perfect ratio to the pickled plum in the ball's center, and I ate it with relish. Really, they were perfect when you were hungry, so simple and wholesome and…

"Have you ever," Kuwabara said as I finished my final bite, "thought that seaweed tasted… oh, I dunno, blue?"

I swallowed down a mouthful of lukewarm green tea as I thought about that, frowning. "No," I said, mouth bitter from the tea and something I could not name. "No, I haven't."

"Oh." Silence. "Guess that's just me, then."

"It's not," I said, but I didn't know why I said it. "Shoot. Shoot. Why does that make me feel like I'm missing something?"

"I mean, seaweed is obviously _green_ when you look at it," Kuwabara said, talking like he hadn't heard me. "But when I taste it it just tastes _blue_, you know. Is that weird?"

"Kind of," I said. I wasn't sure what prompted my next question. "Does anything else taste like a… well, a color?"

"Nope," Kuwabara said, and I heard him stand up. "Just seaweed. Oh, but sometimes my sister smells like purple, but only when she uses a certain hairspray. Does that count?"

"I suppose."

"Then, yes." He paused. "This was a weird conversation."

I smirked. "I concur."

"I'm gonna go back to the temple now." He poked his head over the lip. His eyes were narrow, but he was smiling… sort of. "Good luck," he said, hair sticking up in the back from where he'd lain on it. "I hope you make it back before dark. It'll get cold."

I grimaced. "I hope so, too," I said, and I told him goodbye.

* * *

I tried to go about my training as I had been all day—form an image, project the image, power the image, watch the image crumble under the weight of its own reality. It's just that Kuwabara's words("It just tastes blue, you know?") kept giving me nagging reminders of something hovering just at the edges of my memory, and it drove me nuts.

I mean, have you ever had a song stuck in your head, but you could only remember about eight of the words? It was like that. I knew that tasting the color blue in seaweed had something to do with my dream, whatever that had been, and that that in turn had something to do with Genkai's task, but I could not figure out the connection for all the money in the world!

And then I started getting cravings for cinnamon rolls.

It started small. I was cold in my higher-than-the-treetops prison, and I wanted something warm to eat. And then the tea was so bitter than I wanted something sweet. Eventually those two longings turned into the specific want of a cinnamon roll. I was picturing a cowboy boot in an attempt to summon an illusion when the first craving hit, and every attempt to summon something thereafter was crushed by the weight of that want. It overrode everything, made it hard to think, and when I started having trouble remembering my own name I decided that enough was enough, dammit, and that I needed to fix this, quick.

"OK," I muttered to myself as I sat there. I had my elbows on my knees, my face in my hands. My curtain of hair blocked my face from the wind. "All of this started with my dream. What can I remember about it?"

"Kuwabara said I kept saying 'roll', so I guess that's where I got this massive craving from."

"He also said I kept talking about fruit."

"How are fruit and rolls connected?"

I thought about that for a while, thinking up different connections between these factors, but I came up with nothing… until I remembered how Kuwabara woke me up. I had seen him hovering over me, his face drawn and worried as I tried to tumble off the cliff, and…

That's when I remembered him wearing the banana costume.

"Where did _bananas_ come from?" I said to myself, throwing my hands into the air. "I know Lauren hates bananas, but she wasn't in my dream so why…"

And _that_ little feat of word association made me remember the smoothie business. Lauren _had_ been in my dream, she had been mad at me for putting a banana in her smoothie! How the hell had I forgotten?

But what did all of that have to do with cinnamon rolls?

I wracked my brain for an answer. How did we get from talking about how she hated bananas to cinnamon rolls? I felt like there was a bridge between the two things, but what was it? And what did it have to do with Kuwabara tasting blue in seaweed?

Soon after, I remembered.

"It just tastes so green," she had said as she poured a stream of pink sludge into my blender. "And not the good kind of green—it tastes like chartreuse. Char-freaking-treuse. And I hate that color, especially the way it tastes."

How had I forgotten the one thing Lauren has always prided herself on? And how had I confused the word 'cinnamon' with the one I had been trying to remember this whole time?

Synesthesia, as Lauren so often put it, was a genetic mutation that resulted in a neurological phenomenon that messed up people's senses. It was when nerve paths—such as the ones that control senses like taste, sight, and scent—intersected just before they hit the brain, making people taste a phantom taste when they saw a color or similar. Tastes, to people with synesthesia, could have texture and notes and color, just like Kuwabara did when he ate the seaweed and just like Lauren did when she tasted the banana. There were also forms of it that gave numbers spacial distances, colors different temperatures, musical certain notes colors…

Wait.

Music?

Was that what Lauren was trying to tell me?

My subconscious added everything up in an instant. Lauren's synesthesia, my lack of visual skills, Genkai wanting me to think outside the box… whoever said my illusions had to be based on sight? I was making them, wasn't I?, and what spoke to me louder than music?

There was a term for it, actually, though at the time I couldn't recall the exact word. It was when the melody of music actually mimicked the subject matter of the accompanying lyrics: the notes climbed when you talked about flying or going up, the notes dipped when you sang about a fall, the song flew through the major key when you wanted a warm emotion and the tempo escalated when you spoke about rushing through life, or something similar. And I could do all of those things, I knew I could, because I had been an ace at my composition class and if there was one thing I was good at it, it was coordinating music and lyrics.

How hard could it be to synchronize reality and what was in my head when I had music to pave the way?

"My music theory teacher would be so proud," I said to myself, and I smiled.

I couldn't get it right away. I became distracted by the way the sun set over the

* * *

valley, staining the trees with gold and the rivers with molten copper, and then darkness fell before I was able to do anything illusion crafting. The darkness fell like some oppressive and all-seeing cloud, and with that darkness came unrelenting cold.

The wind picked up first, fingers of chill that crept under my clothes and made me shiver like a dead leaf. The cold was so intense that it was almost a physical pain that crept down into my bones and wrapped them in a coating of chalky ache, one which made me feel like I was about to crumble every time I moved. It hurt to breathe, because the cold seared my lungs from the inside out, and it became impossible to hum because my teeth clattered too much to allow for it.

I tried whistling after that, but my mouth became too dry. I finished off the last of the green tea as the millions of stars came out to play, and concentrating was too hard as I huddled against the slope nearby, trying to hide from the wind while I curled in one my own body.

"If o-only I had a blanket," I stuttered, feeling the goose bumps on my arms chafe against my bare legs as I hugged them to my chest. My bad foot felt especially pained. I tried not to think about it, and since outward expression of music was limited by the cold, I internalized it all by retreating into theta.

Theta helped me disengage from the cold around me, letting me retreat back into the warm depths of my mind. Once submerged, I pulled music from nothing and let myself get lost in it. I wrapped the scintillating strains around me, reveling in their light and in their sound, and when a blast of ferocious wind hit my half-sleeping body I felt the music shiver and threaten to dissolve.

_If only,_ I thought through the music, _I had a blanket._

As if it were listening to me, the music—which was suddenly alive and in tune with my thoughts on a level I did not think possible—changed. It became mellifluous and comforting, flowing through the warmth of the major key like water bent on enveloping me in security and love. It wove in on itself and coalesced into something made of flowing legato notes that soothed and warmed me, and then the music gave me the gentle _push_ of a mother bird telling her baby chick that it was time to leave the nest.

I opened my eyes.

The first thing I noticed was the lack of something, and that thing was cold. I wasn't cold anymore—at least, not completely. My feet were still frozen and I was still chilled down to my bones, but I wasn't shivering at all.

The second thing I noticed was the scent of wool.

The third thing I noticed was the scratchy sensation chafing the skin of my shoulders.

My hands were balled up against my chest, fingers wound tight into cloth that smelled of wool and laundry detergent. It felt like home as I clutched the woolen blanket tighter around me, and with a happy cry I covered my feet with it and felt my throat tighten up.

I had done it! I had made a blanket!

The question was… how?

I examined the blanket, first, and what I found was surprising. It was the exact image and feel—and scent; the detergent was familiar—of a blanket my mother had knitted me when I was a child. She had made it from wool yarn that had once been pink but was now a dull gray from overuse, and as I examined it I even found a familiar hole, black around the edges, from where I had burned it through with a candle one long-ago Halloween.

It made sense, in a way. This blanket was the one I was most familiar with in the whole world(s?), and it was the one I managed to summon when I thought of everything that a blanket represented: warmth, home, security, and comfort. Perfect sense. Immaculate sense.

I realized, once I got over my shock, that I was humming. My vocal chords were loose and open with warmth, and it took me a moment to realize just what tune I was humming.

It was the tune that I had created—or had been given—in theta. When I thought about it, I realized that the tune was constantly cycling around in my head, and when I didn't think about it it fluttered at the back of my mind like a song I couldn't get out of my head. I could pull it up to attention and push it back down into obscurity at will. It didn't matter which I did, though. No matter what, the blanket stayed tight around my body.

"Genkai was right," I said to myself. "Once an illusion it made, it's self-sustaining. Huh." A thought occurred to me. "I wonder how many I can do at one time?"

There was only one way to find out.

I dove back into theta.

* * *

Thinking of fire in terms of music wasn't as hard as I anticipated. I envisioned the sparks, first: bright high notes, jumping about in playful staccato with little tempo to order them in line. But beneath the seemingly random sparks was a central order, one that soon ignited into a roaring conflagration of deeper notes, notes that consumed even as they gave heat and light and life. The melody was gentle and hungry and selfish all at once, and as it became steady I felt the blanket-melody pale beside the brilliance of the firesong.

Then the blanket song disappeared, wisps of it fading into nothing as the fire burned bright. I grasped at it in desperation, but my mind just wasn't big enough to hold two melodies at once, and it faded.

I knew, in a deeper part of me, that I could have held both strains had I been stronger, but I wasn't stronger. I was just me.

"Practice," I whispered as the fire pushed me back to waking thought. A plume of smokeless fire burned six inches above the ground in front of me, making my face tingle as it was bathed in radiant heat. "With practice, I could do more."

"You could," said a voice.

I saw him just as he spoke, and as our eyes locked—his illuminated from within by my fire, glowing ruby red and intent—I felt myself jump, startled, and shrink back into the lee of the slope above me.

To my surprise, Hiei sat down on the other side of my fire. He, unlike me, did not seem, to be cold at all despite his clothing choice. All he wore was a shirt that had once had sleeves but didn't any more, black pants, and boots. I wondered where his cloak went. Or, since he was a fire demon, did he feel cold at all?

How hot did Hiei burn, really?

"Music," Hiei said slowly, eyes lingering on my fire. "Genkai mentioned you might try this."

I stared at him. He stared at me.

"I had a blanket, before," I said, and I gestured at the fire. "I can't do two things at once. It's too much."

"Practice," Hiei said, and I nodded. "But you aren't here to make a fire. You're here to get out."

I looked at my fire again. It looked like a real one even though it had no fuel, was floating above the ground, and seemed more gold than any normal campground fire I'd ever seen. Still, it was a beautiful, romanticized rendition of fire, the type you dream of but the type you never actually see. It beat back the dark around me like a ward, and with a pang I realized that I would have to extinguish it in order to think of something that would lift me from my prison.

"But I like the fire," I said softly, watching the way it undulated in the wind. It did not dim despite the interference.

"Do you," Hiei said, but it wasn't a question. I wouldn't get the double meaning of his words until much later.

"Of course," I said, looking at it. "It's… comforting. I'm less lonely now."

Hiei didn't say anything, but he did lean forward and stick his hand in the fire. My heart jumped into my mouth as he twisted his hand amid the flames, but he did not wince as he cupped a portion of the fire and brought it out of the rest.

"I'm fire," he said, eyes on me as the flames caressed his skin. "Did you know that?"

I froze, but not because of the wind tossing my hair. "I didn't know," I said.

"My father," Hiei said, and when he looked at the fire in his hand I could breathe again, "was a fire apparition."

The rarity of hearing about Hiei's heritage straight from him own lips struck me. I sat completely still, afraid the moment would break if I did something wrong, and Hiei kept speaking.

"I never knew him," Hiei said. "My mother was an ice apparition. I hated her." He started looking at me again, red eyes huge and dark in the firelight. I couldn't see the color of his caramel skin in the darkness and his hair blended in with the sky, but I knew every line of him as he spoke. Hiei was not forgettable; not by any means. "I used to hate that part of myself, too. Her people are weak, spineless, cowardly and without honor. They tossed an infant off of a mountain simply because they did not understand it."

I murmured, "You."

Eyes that were hurt, defiant, and angry slipped over mine. "Yes. And when I felt the fire inside me, it beat back the cold of my mother's half." His next words were sardonic, and wry. " I know more than you about the comfort of fire."

I tried to smile. "I don't know what to say."

"I don't want your pity," he snapped, and he closed his fist with a curl of powerful fingers. The fire went out in a burst of color and heat. "You of all people should know that."

My temper flared. "I didn't offer it," I said, and his brow twisted when I threw his words back in his face. "I _do_ know better than that. I know more than you about pity."

Perfect lips curled over straight white teeth.

"I _do_," I said, protesting his silent disagreement. For some reason I found myself becoming angry. "And do you want to know why, Hiei? It's because you're stronger than me." I smirked at him, shifting my legs under me so I was kneeling amid the grass and darkened flowers. "I admit it. Go ahead and gloat. You are a million times stronger than I will ever, ever be, and because of that people don't pity you—they respect you, or at least fear you. But me? I'm this weak little girl with a bad body and very few brains to speak of. Music I can do, but everything else is pretty much beyond me, so yeah, I think I know pretty _damn_ well if you want to know the truth."

Hiei—who had been looking at me without expression the whole time—tilted his head to one side. The fire made his cheeks look lean and hollow. The look was a handsome one. "So you want," he said, "someone to protect you."

I gaped at him. "What…"

"You said it yourself: you're weak," Hiei said without a trace of irony. "The weak die without protection. Do you want to die?"

"No," I had to say.

"Then you need a protector," he said, and I wondered with rising urgency what he was getting at. But, just as I was reliving the does-Hiei-like-me-oh-God-oh-God moment I had had back at the hotel, he surprised me. "But no one would want to protect you when you can't even escape a place like this. Your fire, for all it keeps you warm, does not held you move forward."

I smirked as I sat back down. "Move' up,' you mean. Moving forward would only make me fall over that cliff."

He smirked back. "Let go of the fire. It's a comfort, but clinging fast to comforts will only keep you here. You need to move… up. Let it go."

So I did. The darkness and cold rushed in, and I heard a rustle and a step before another source of warmth appeared at my side. Before I knew what was happening, Hiei had slipped an arm around my shoulders.

"You don't need to fear the cold," he murmured in my ear, and because the emotions that suffused me were ones I did not want to contemplate too hard, I dove straight into theta.

This time, reeling from the seed of that odd emotion I didn't want to think about, I summoned an orchestra of music to wash it all away. I let the music do as it would, rel above my head like flocks of birds and thunder clouds, and a note in the highest register I could hear pinged loudly in my mind below the aching rush of music. All of the loud music rushed down and filled that tiny pinging peal, and when I opened my eyes I felt something small and cool and solid in my palm.

I stared at it, every nerve ending alive when I realized that the warmth of Hiei's presence was still burning into my neck and shoulders and side, and then I pushed away from him. I knelt on the grass and began to paw at it with one of my hands, suddenly sure of what I was supposed to do.

"What are you doing?" Hiei asked in a soft voice, and his hands joined mine in clearing away the windflowers.

I was panting from exertion by the time dirt—a darker brown than the colorless pants I had dug up—peeked out of the foliage. With aching fingers I pressed the tiny object in my hands into the soft soil, and then I fell back onto the ground and watched the place glow jade green.

I turned to look at Hiei, who was kneeling at my side. He had his hands stretched out toward the place that glowed in the earth, and then he looked at me and I smiled. His face looked silly, bathed as it was in light that glowed brighter every second. His bloody eyes looked like mud, the kind that would give life to any fledgling tree.

Lucky for me, that's exactly what I needed.

"You planted the seed that gave me this idea," I joked, unable to stop smiling, "so… it's time to watch it grow."

That's when the seed sprouted.

I had planned the music that formed the tree back in theta and stored it inside the seed melody, so when I planted the seed in the real world it gave the treesong a chance to come forth. As I watched, a glowing green shoot rose from the glowing green patch of earth, and then a bud the size of my thumb sprouted. It trembled before unfurling in a shower of jade sparks, and that lead soon grew to the size of a dinner plate.

"Up, up, and away," I whispered, and a thousand new leaves burst forth. A riot of green sparks cascaded into the valley and over the cliff, and the tree shot up into the sky as branches and leaves and sweet-smelling magnolia blossoms bloomed in motion so fast it was hard to track.

I don't remember rising to my feet, but I do remember Hiei slipping an arm around my waist, pulling me to him, and jumping onto the lowest branch. Then he just stood on it, holding me steady as the tree's natural growth took us up and over the cliff's edge, and I watched us rise up with my mouth wide open.

When we rose up high enough, Hiei jumped off the branch and down onto the highway's pavement. The tree kept climbing into the sky, higher than any tree I had even seen before, and then it stopped, trembling with new life and green light and a scent so sweet it made me want to cry.

"How did…" I managed, and Hiei let me go.

On impulse, I took a step toward the tree. Hiei made a sound deep in his throat, and I turned to look at him. The treesong sang inside my head.

"Can I… touch it?" I asked him, and he nodded.

"It's yours," he said, and I moved over the guardrail to caress its rough bark. The bark was brown and textured, but it glowed green from within as my fingers ran it over and memorized its every flaw.

"I… made this?" I said in wonder. I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life. How could _I_ have made it?

"Yes," said Hiei. "But others can see this too. Put it away."

I hesitated, drawing in a sharp breath as I shot Hiei a dark look, but he shook his head.

"Once yours, always yours," he said. "You can never lose it now. So put it away. It will not forget you."

My lips quivered. "You promise?" I asked, feeling as if everything rode on what Hiei felt and thought and said, and when he nodded I let myself be at peace.

I reached out to touch the tree again. It exploded beneath my fingertips, lighting up the sky with a thousand emerald sparks, and I turned away. The treesong disappeared, ghosting away without so much as a goodbye, but I could feel it glowing deep within myself in a place I could not name.

Suddenly, the dark felt full of life.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Synesthesia is real, and I should know because I have two forms of it (I always knew I was more like Lauren than Dani!). But I'm sorry this chapter started off with such rambling-ness. I leave for college tomorrow and am really distracted. =[ I don't want to say bye to my boyfriend; he lives across the country when I'm at school. Sad day._

_Well, there's the Hiei moment I promised. All that talk of protecting, and even a little physical contact… (*shiver*) Hope you liked it. =]_

_Also, I PROMISE that I will actually answer your reviews for this chapter. I really, really, REALLY wanted to answer some on CH34, but I never had the time (it's been a busy week). So expect to hear from me if you review!_

_On that note, many thanks to: Kaiya's Watergarden, Reclun, Kai-Chan94, American Senpai, Koryu Elric, dumbrat, 0nfateswings, dude where's my spirit gun, colbub, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, ilovemusicrox12, White Rose Fox, Rokkugoh, AkaMizu-chan, Foxgirl Ray, ichixichigo, Dyani91, Wolf-Cry-Night, chocolateluvr13, archangel fighter, LadyoftheGags, miyakomono, DoilyRox, LupinePhyre909, WickedLovelyDream, j.d.y., Crescent Venus, Hiei08, XAudra RoseX, double a battery, ShadowFireFox13, and Katt Jeane!_


	36. Chapter 36: Aqueous Transmission

Future Talk

Chapter 36:

"Aqueous Transmission"

* * *

Genkai gave me quite the look when I stumbled up the last of the temple's steps. "You could see that for miles," she grumbled, handing me a jacket as I shivered up to her side. "I figured you for the more subtle type."

Hiei stepped out of the darkness at my back, and then he spoke the first words he'd said since we began our walk home. "She'll get subtlety with experience," he said. "Big things are simpler for novices to grasp."

I narrowed my eyes at him as I pulled the coat on. It smelled of mothballs and had seen better days, but at that moment it felt like a warm spring day. "Gee, thanks," I said, chafing my arms with my hands for warmth, and he shrugged.

"Get inside; it's cold, but get used to it because it's even colder where Ryu's hiding," Genkai said as a gust of wind threatened to knock me off my feet.

"You're kidding, right?" I said through clenched teeth, and we went indoors. The air in the temple was blessedly still and stuffy, and I was able to stop shivering as I limped toward my room.

"You're not hungry?" Genkai called after me.

I turned, wanting to answer her, but I ended up just barely missing a collision with Hiei. He was standing right behind me, having followed on silent feet. With a scowl I leaned around him and looked at Genkai, who was smirking with unreadable emotion reflected in her deep brown eyes.

"Nope," I said. "Just tired. See you at breakfast?"

She just chuckled, looking away with a curl of her wrinkled mouth. "Only if the two of you don't stay up so late you miss that meal entirely," she said, and she vanished into the kitchen before I could recover my dropped jaw. When I pulled back, face red and stuttering because I had _no_ idea what she meant but I didn't like it _just_ the same, I found that Hiei seemed amused. Red eyes seemed to glow like an animal's in the gloom.

"What are _you_ staring at?" I snipped, not liking the flash of white teeth that made my breathing hitch, and I wheeled around walked away from him. I could feel his bodyheat against my back, trailing after me like a fire's ghost, and when I threw open the door to my room he hovered on the threshold.

I turned back to find him with his hands braced on both sides of the doorframe, barring my way out again. "Good ni-ight," I said, and I shut the door in his face. His expression—one of smug satisfaction, but not one I understood in context—didn't waver as the door blocked him from sight, and when I cracked the door open about a minute later he was still wearing that infuriating look.

"What," I asked in a low voice, "do you want?"

He didn't reply for a minute, eyes that glittered with amusement searching my face up and down for several seconds. I felt like backing away, but I knew he'd only take it as a sign of weakness so I uncertainly stood my ground.

"Nothing," he said at last, and his arms dropped to his sides as his hands slid into his pockets. "Night." His eyes lingered on mine for a second longer than they needed to before he turned away.

"Uh… night," I said, watching him walk into the darkness. Then a thought struck me, and just as he vanished completely I called: "Hiei?"

His response was immediate: "What?"

"Are you… still there?"

I heard his feet hit the wooden floor before he reappeared a few feet away, but to me it still seemed like a phantom had appeared. I made a startled sound—an 'eep!', or something—and jumped, hand flying to my mouth.

He rolled his eyes. "I'm still here," he said, sounding bored. The bandana concealing his Jagan was black tonight, I noticed. In fact, everything he wore—from his high-waisted pants to his ripped up shirt, bandana, and boots—was black. The only colors on his body were his crimson eyes and the white streaks in his hair. "What do you want?"

"Um," I said, not quite knowing how to express my sudden lightbulb-moment.

His lips pursed, expression lazy and incredulous. "Spit it out."

I did. "I want… to try something."

Hiei froze, eyes flying from half-lidded to totally open in an instant. Tense shoulders cut the darkness like knives.

My brow knit. "Um… are you OK?"

He didn't answer. A step carried him my way, and before I knew it he was standing just outside my door again. Despite the fact that he only had three inches on me, he seemed to tower over my diminutive height.

"What," he said in a voice I could barely hear, "did you want to try?"

I swallowed as I looked up into his face, words lost in my mouth. He didn't blink when I stuttered: "Can, can I—"

"Dani," he said, tone low and dangerous, and when he seemed to pull even closer—

I blurted: "Can I go play the piano?"

* * *

I sat on the bench and Hiei stood near the door, arms crossed and feet together. I looked at him over my shoulder after I lifted my instrument's lid, and I smiled.

"I've been wanting to try this since I sang the tree-song," I said, pushing my loose pigtails over my shoulders so they wouldn't get in the way of my hands, and Hiei closed his eyes.

"Then try it," he said, chin falling onto his chest, and had it not been for the wire-tight set of his body I would have thought he was asleep. But I could see the dimples from where his fingers dug into his taut biceps, so I knew he was listening to everything I did. "Though I don't see why you need me for this."

My fingers touched the keys but did not press them. Their cracked enamel felt rough against my skin. "Oh, I need you all right," I said. I heard him shift behind me. "I need you to just listen, and when I ask I need you to tell me what you hear. Can you do that?"

He said: "Yes."

And so I played.

I started it simply, just getting a feel for a song I knew I could work with. Quiet chords, uncomplicated progression, basic stuff… I sang the lyrics without jazzing them up at all, letting raw emotion speak louder than flair or pomp.

"You oughtta know," I sang. "Tonight is the night to let it show…"

The stupid radio mix of Jay Sean's "Down" is downright hate able—it turns a song about acceptance and uncompromising love into an unrecognizable mishmash of pop beats and little consequence. But there's a lesser know version, the Candlelight Remix, that strips away the unnecessary glitter and bares the song's true soul. Just a piano and a pleading voice, with some light strings to add substance but not enough to overpower the song's resonance. No abrasive drums, no backup vocals, no pomp, just… love.

That's the one I sang.

I slipped into theta during my second rotation of the song, drawing the emotional resonance of the piece over myself like a loving shroud. I let it bathe me in light, let each emotion of the song express itself in the strains of a single instrument. Love became a trembling viola, light violet and airy… surrender a mournful violin of glittering copper… hope an insistent cello that glowed warmly with golden light…

The music—which had risen and surged in theta like the sea—pushed me away when it rose to unbearable heights, and I opened my eyes and ears once I left that melodious womb.

The world around me thrummed and sang, alive with the instruments that weren't there. My hands were still playing at the piano, still guiding the music that I had created like a shepherd herding sheep, but there was more to it, and when my eyes adjusted I realized that there was something flowing through the air around me. Lights I could hardly see but hardly look away from surged in rhythm with the music, creating a tapestry of emotion made visible that pulsed and pinged with every note and fluctuation.

It was a strange feeling. I could feel the light centered in my head, echoing what was in the world around me. It was like I was a paper lantern lit from within by a bright candle, and everything inside myself was projected outward via that creative light.

"There is music here," Hiei said when I paused mid-lyric for breath. "And light. You made that?"

I looked at him over my shoulder in excitement, singing the final verse with a surge of new energy: "Baby, don't worry, you are my only, you won't be lonely, even if the sky is falling… down." I sang the rest of the lyrics to the ceiling, smiling without control.

But then the song ended.

I sat there for a long time, fingers just touching the keys, watching the way the light played in the air around me. Even when I wasn't playing the music stilled echoed, filling the room to the brim with unheard strings and peals. My voice and the piano were the only things missing, but with a breath I closed my eyes and just sang.

And the piano picked up in the chorus of unseen instruments.

Then, I stopped singing.

But the music didn't compensate.

My concentration faltered when I realized that I couldn't mentally recreate my own voice, and so did the instrumental parts. The lights rushed back into my head, suffusing me in thunderous theta, and my connection to the outside world dwindled. It took everything I had to push the music down and find myself again, and with a gasp I managed to metabolize the melody and resurface into the physical world.

Hiei had come to stand beside me while I was out, and when I whipped my head up and saw him standing in the sliver of space between the piano bench and the piano, I froze. He had a hand stretched out like he was about to take me by the shoulder, but when our eyes met he wheeled around and walked a few feet away, standing with his hands in his pockets and his back to me.

"What," I said breathlessly, "happened?"

His head turned until I saw his face in profile. For some reason, the angle made his nose seem more snubbed than usual, all childlike and sweet despite the intensity of his eyes. "You played and you sang," he said, "and when you went into theta, more instruments joined in. So did lights. I assume that was your doing."

"I guess," I said.

"Then you stopped playing, but your mind picked it up," he continued. "You stopped singing, and your mind didn't. Why?"

I frowned, bracing my hands on the bench so I could lean back a little. I looked up at the ceiling and sighed. "I know instruments really well," I said slowly, "so I know how they'd sound in basically any situation. But no one can really know their own voice."

Hiei's eyes flicked my way over his shoulder. "Why do you say that?" he murmured.

I shrugged. "Ever heard a recording of yourself speaking?"

"No."

"It won't sound like you think it will." I poked myself in the temple with my forefinger. "Your head creates acoustics around your eardrum, and your voice resonates in your bones and brain case when it vibrates in your throat. It gets distorted along the way, so what you hear is totally different from what others hear." I laughed, hand dropping back down so I could lean on it some more. My feet kicked by the piano's pedals. "You could do my true voice better than I could if you wanted. I bet I could mimic _your_ voice perfectly."

He turned around. "You know my voice?" he said.

I smiled a small half-smile. "Sure. Better than mine."

I didn't know what I expected his reaction to be, but what he said was not it. "I know _yours_," he said, taking a step closer. "It's not perfect. That makes it memorable."

My cheeks got hot as I sat up straighter and looked at the piano's keys. "Well. Thanks, I guess."

Neither of us moved.

"It's late," Hiei said at last, tone brusque. "Get to bed. Genkai has plans for you in the morning."

I looked at him; he looked at me.

"Thanks," I said. "For helping me tonight. I mean it."

He smirked, eyes closing, and he moved to the door. One hand went up to the frame, and his eyes glared at me over one mostly-bare shoulder.

"Nonsense," he said, and he started to leave, footsteps ringing quietly away...

Something made me stop him again. "Hiei, wait."

His steps ceased, but he did not return. I assumed he was listening, though, when I said: "The other night, when you and I traded memories. Do you remember that?"

He did not reply.

I took a deep breath. "Something in mine made you angry," I said. "Can I ask what that something was?"

Silence greeted me for a long time, and I had just about decided he had left when I heard his voice cut through the gloom.

"Nonsense," he repeated, and was gone.

* * *

Genkai greeted me in the kitchen the next morning with a huge roll of wax paper and a permanent marker. "Draw me America," she said, spreading the paper out across the table. She shoved the marker into my hands. "And everything else you can think of, for that matter."

"What, no breakfast?" I mumbled.

"Everyone else ate already," she snapped. "The boys are training. You're going to teach them about America when they're done. Get busy."

"Me? Teach?" I asked in disbelief, and Genkai walked around me. I thought she was going to leave, but instead she put her hands into the small of my back and shoved me at the table. Then she continued to push me toward a chair, and with a kick she yanked a chair out from under the table by the leg. A single tug on my wrist sent my crashing into the chair butt-first, teeth clicking together with a snap.

She went to the refrigerator and pulled it open; the next thing I knew, a Tupperware box had skidded across the paper and stopped in front of me, and it was followed by two chopsticks that narrowly missed the hands I had spread on the tabletop. Genkai had thrown them like knives, making them stick out of the paper like daggers that quivered from the force of her throw.

I glared at her, hands tucked safely in my lap. "Wow. You sure are keeping my reflexes sharp."

She walked to the door and glared at me from it. Then she pointed at the Tupperware.

"Eat that and work. I'll be back in an hour. I want to know every last detail you can tell us about America—don't disappoint me."

Then she slammed the door and turned a key.

I gaped at the door for a moment, then stood up. "Genkai!" I called, but when no answer came I sat back down and viciously ripped the lid off of the cold omelet rice Genkai had offered me. I tore into it like it was the last thing to eat on earth, and as I did I stared at the paper before me in frustration.

Just where the hell was I supposed to _start_, anyway?

* * *

Yusuke, Kuwabara, Kurama, Hiei, and Botan all sat across from me at the kitchen table, staring at the paper I had covered with mini-maps, lists, and charts. I held it up against my body with one hand and used a chopstick as an impromptu pointer with the other, breathing deep so I could gather up my thoughts.

Those thoughts were shattered, however, when I noticed who wasn't there.

"Um, where's Jin?" I asked, and the lot of them exchanged looks before Kurama answered me.

"He had to return to the Demon World early this morning," he said. "He has duties to attend to. A new apprentice, I understand."

"Oh." _What, no goodbye?_ I thought, but dwelling on it wouldn't change anything so I just started my lecture. "Let's go over the geography first. Is that good place to start?"

Yusuke raised his hand, and that earned him and incredulous look from Kuwabara. But Yusuke just elbowed him in the ribs and kept his hand held high, so I said: "Yes, Yusuke?"

He pointed. "Is that supposed to be a map?"

"Um… yes?"

He laughed. "You can't draw worth shit!"

I promptly chucked my marker at him. He dodged, but Botan whacked him on the back of the head for me, so in the end I felt like I had had my revenge, after all.

"There Americas are made up of two continents," I went on. "North, and South."

I pointed at the rough sketch with my stick, then dragged it down the length of Central America.

"And this is the bridge between the two—Central America."

"Now, South America is made up of a bunch of different countries. Most of them speak Spanish or Portuguese. Central America is also a bunch of countries that speak Spanish or Portuguese."

Kurama, ever knowledgeable, raised an eyebrow. "But those languages have been dead for centuries," he said. "Only people studying the classics learn them."

I gaped at him, then said: "But Spanish came from Spain! Isn't Spain still around?"

"Well sure," said Kuwabara. "It's just that Japanese is spoken there. Japanese and Chinese are spoken pretty much everywhere these days."

"The Asian economies boomed and took over," Botan added. "It's been that way for hundreds of years. Most romance languages faded into obscurity around the turn of the last millennia."

"Oh." I paused. "Well, then. Things really _have_ changed since I woke up."

Botan raised her hand, face drawn and sheepish. When I nodded at her, she said: "Do _you_ speak Spanish?"

"Um… no."

"Oh." She paused. "Well, neither do I. Boys?"

"No, I'm afraid," said Kurama.

I waved my hands at them. "Doesn't matter. I'm thinking this is all taking place in North America, anyway," I said. "Genkai mentioned that Ryu was in a cold place, and South America was pretty much tropical. Moving on?"

They nodded in agreement.

"Good!" I smacked the North America portion of my messy map with the chopstick. "North America is made up of the United States and Canada. The US speaks English, which I totally know, and Canada speaks a combination of English and French. Now, I know a few words of French, but I don't know if anyone even speaks it anymore—"

"It, like Spanish, is not modernly used," said Kurama. "Although I don't know if the same will prove true in Demon World."

"Well, English used to be the most widely spoken language when I was… um, alive," I said. "So if there are still people in Demon-World-America, they'd probably know English. I think we're OK on that point." I looked back at my map. "The technology in my world or time or whatever was pretty much up to date with what you have now. Like, cars and cellphones and stuff. I don't know much about what my arms industry or computer industry was like, though, so I can't compare it." I gestured at my sheet. "I wrote down a bunch of medical stuff, too, because I was in the hospital a lot and I know a lot on that note. Also, stuff on music and everything. But if ten thousand years have passed, I doubt much of that will be there anymore." I clapped my hands together. "OK. Any questions?"

"How big is the continent?" Kurama asked, and I paused.

"Um," I said. I stared down at my map. "Well, to drive from home to college was… shoot, was it twelve hundred miles or twelve thousands miles?" The absurdity of that statement struck me. I sighed, berating myself for my own stupidity. "Definitely twelve hundred."

"Is that English you're speaking?" Botan asked, and I realized that I had indeed lapsed into it.

"Oh, yeah," I said with a nervous laugh. "It sure was. I was just talking myself through everything." I pointed at the map, at the southeastern portion of the US in a rough approximation of the state of Alabama. "Now, that's where I went to college," I said, tracing a line up to the blobs that represented the great lakes, "and that's where I grew up. The distance between the two is twelve hundred mi… er, about two thousand kilometers?"

Yusuke's eyes went buggy. "That's a huge island!" he said, staring at North America in shock. "And here I was thinking it was just another Japan."

"Nope," I said. "Far from it. It was a huge superpower back in its day because it had so much room to produce crops and stuff."

"It makes sense that it was destroyed, then," said Botan. "We would have heard about it otherwise. What a place. But to have such advanced technology so lnog ago…"

I shrugged. "Some people think time is cyclical, so I suppose it's possible." I tapped the chopstick into the palm of my other hand. "Any questions?"

A chorus of 'no's.

"Good. Then I guess this class is dismissed." I sagged back into my chair. "That was stressful."

Everyone stood up to leave, chairs dragging over linoleum in a chorus of screams. Hiei, who had been standing by the door during the whole things, just walked out.

"I don't recommend you teach for a living," said Yusuke, walking over to the fridge so he could raid it.

"Oh, shut it," I griped, and I heaved out of my chair. Botan and Kurama were bent over my list and map and talking in low voices; I gave them a nod as I walked out, the sounds of Yusuke and Kuwabara fighting over the last slice of cake echoing behind me.

I was going to go back to my room and practice my illusion building, maybe fool around with my ukulele if the mood struck me, but that was not to be. As soon as I put my hands on the doorknob to my room, it opened on its own.

"We need to talk," Genkai said, glaring up at me as I jumped back with a squeal. "Outside. Now."

I recovered my wits quickly enough. "Just let me get my ukulele, and—"

"Now," she said, and she stalked off. With a roll of my eyes I darted into my room, put on my tennis shoes, and limped after her; luckily she had walked rather slowly, and I managed to catch up with her on the porch.

"Where are we going?" I asked as she took a right on the porch and started following it down the length of the temple.

"Quit worrying about the walk," she snapped.

I raised an eyebrow. "Hey, you all but pushed me off a cliff the last time we took one of these walks."

"We're just going into the meditation garden," she said, tossing her hair when she smirked, and she slid open a door before ducking into it. I tread after her through dark hallways and into a large room with a floor of tatami mats. On the other side of it was a traditional sliding paper door, and when she opened it I couldn't help but gasp.

Before us lay a square garden that was obviously the temple's heart. Surrounded on all sides by red-painted porch that cupped more paper doors, the little garden boasted three huge boulders set in a diagonal line across the central square, riotous bunches of flowers that bloomed out of small circles of rich earth, and a sandy floor that had been raked into identical swirling furrows of uniform width and depth. In one corner was a pool with a water wheel turning in its center, and a stream flowed out of that pool and encircled the entire garden. There was even a miniature red bridge, Shinto style and graceful, arching over the dark water like a path to heaven.

Genkai crossed that bridge with a look that urged me to follow. I did so with wonder, glancing down at the miniature river in delight. It was lined with deep blue tile and had lily pads spackled across its surface; I caught a flash of orange and white as a massive Koi fish swam beneath them, scales undulating in the sunlight streaming down from overhead.

"Dani?" Genkai said, and I flinched. I had been standing motionless on the small bridge, staring at the water with my mouth open. Genkai had somehow managed to jump atop one of the three large boulders, the one farthest from me. She stood firm with her hands on her hips, jaw set. "Get on the middle rock. Now."

I stepped onto the sanded ground gingerly, watching with regret the way my shoes disturbed the lines and whorls. The middle rock only came up to my hips, but it still strained my arms to clamber up.

Once I was settled, Genkai jumped off of her rock and onto the porch; then she vanished into one of the nearby paper doors, and when she returned a second later she had a small rake in her right hand. Muttering to herself, she stepped onto the sand and began to draw the lines anew, and when she circled the rock on which I sat I realized she was actually singing in a voice so low I could hardly hear it. The words were unintelligible, but the low, humming thrum of the tune was calming and serene enough to make me fold my legs and breathe deep, hands on my knees as I felt the way the sun tickled my skin and the way the steady splash of the water wheel made my mind drift away…

"Dani," Genkai was saying from somewhere behind me. "Theta. Go."

I didn't need any more instruction. The garden more than invited meditation—it demanded it. I felt myself fall and float, lost on the current of my own self, until Genkai's voice whispered across my brain.

_The Koi,_ she said.

The image of the Koi came to life in a burst of color and light, rushing notes of deep blue and pale orange music. Its fins waved, bright and clear and true, fanning about my face with light brushes of sensation and music, and its black eyes stared into my soul like a pair of oblivion pools. Its scales drew me in the most, made me think of cool dark places and the water embrace of water's life…

_Draw it in,_ Genkai said.

So I did. I breathed in the Koi's music like it was air, feeling it seep into my skin then burst from my every pore. Then it started to bubble up inside me, bubble up and out, and I felt myself start to change—

_No!_ said Genkai. _Do not let it control you! Compromise! _

I pulled the Koi back in, grabbing it with unseen hands and coaxing it back into my soul with gentle touches and the lightest of cooing whispers. As soon as I did, I felt a balance click into place, and…

_Concentrate on its fins, and its scales._

I did.

Then I opened my eyes.

Genkai was not in front of me, but that hardly mattered as I looked around with newborn eyes. My skin felt slick when it rubbed against itself, and when the sheer oddity of the sensation washed over me, I looked down.

My arms were scaly.

I lifted my hand up in front of my face, flexing fingers that were suddenly webbed with translucent flesh and wrists that glittered with jewel-like scales of black and white and orange. Something by my elbow rippled; I looked to find a fin sprouting from that place, a black one mottled with gold that cut through the air as I moved. I knew without checking that my feet had undergone a similar transformation, and when I twisted I could feel something start pushing beneath the fabric of my shirt…

"You're growing a dorsal fin," Genkai said. I spun on the rock to find her on the porch behind me, smirking in satisfaction. "More features should show themselves soon, though I think the elbow wings were more your imagination that they were pure Koi." She chuckled, looking down at her feet. "What you are experiencing now is a fusion of your imagination, your impression of Koi, and all your preconceptions of what someone half-fish would seem like. And in case you were wondering, I planted the image of the Koi in your mind. You fleshed it out and merged with it, but for a minute there it looked like you were trying to go all-the-way with the fish. I'm not sure how that would have worked, so I stopped you and guided you into merging with the fish's essence instead." She regarded me through cool eyes.

I started to ask her a question, but nothing happened when I tried pushing air out of my throat. I realized, then, that my previous easy breathing had become more than a little labored.

"Oh, fish can't talk, and neither can you now," Genkai said offhandedly. " An essence-shift like this gives you best features of the chosen creature, but also some of the disadvantages." She paused. "I don't think you're meant to impersonate people, Dani. It's dangerous when you do—too dangerous. I think you're more suited to shifts like this instead, or partial ones. Do not attempt when you attempted with Botan again."

I gasped once, then pointed at my throat. My fingers crept up to touch the sides of my throat, and what I found there gave me chills all across my silky, scaly skin.

Gills.

"Now that you're better at visualization," she went on, not seeing my plight for what it was, "you need only visualize a species of a creature you desire and absorb its essence. Don't go for individuals or full changes. Not only is your mind not strong enough, but neither is your body. You're not meant for more than augmenting your true body with additions. A complete change into another form stands in anathema with your soul's rigidity…"

Her voice dropped off into nothing even though her lips were still moving. I could feel her words vibrate against my ears, but I couldn't hear them, and I found my answer when I raised my hands to the sides of my head.

My ears were gone.

Panicked, I scrambled off the rock and hit the sand with a thud. My feet screamed in pain when I tried walking on them, so I crawled, gasping, to the deep pond in the garden's corner. Genkai shouted at me as I rolled in with a splash, but then the water and lilies closed over my head in a wave of muffled cold and I could hear the vibrations of her speech no more.

My new instincts—fishy ones—took over. I began swallowed water at breakneck speeds, feeling it send oxygen to my brain as the filtered liquid passed smoothly through my gills. I lay on my back in the pond, which was barely long enough to accommodate my body, and as I stared up at the green and gold light filtering through the lily pad canopy above my head, a Koi fish as long as my arm swam over my face.

I batted it away with a scowl and an under-water sigh, and then I kicked off my shoes and socks. They floated up to the surface as I flexed my toes (the left ones were still stunted, of course, but now they were webbed with matter like aquatic cobweb) and stretched. I longed to swim free in a bigger pond.

Suddenly overcome with curiosity, I slipped my hands beneath my shirt and ran them up and down my ribs. Several small holes hidden amid my scales shivered at my touch, and I remembered something I had learned while watching Shark Week.

"Sharks do not have ears like we do," the announcer with the soothing voice had said. "They possess lateral lines instead, small pores that house vibration-sensing organs that detect prey, predators, and other sharks."

_That must be these pores_, I thought, touching them. _Gross!_

A shadow cut through the green-gold light, then, and I squinted as the lily pads were parted. Genkai's concerned face swam above the water; she was speaking to me, but I couldn't hear and spread my hands in a "Hey, don't blame me," gesture. I saw her sigh, shake her head, and then the lilies surged over me again.

I sat there for only a few minutes when the lilies parted again, but this time there were four hands that pulled them aside. I flipped over beneath the water so I was on my stomach, and I inched over to the mossy side and ran my hands straight up the vertical surface until they broke through the water's crest. I felt around until I gripped the tile side of the pond, and then I took a deep gulp of water before lifting my torso out of the cool green liquid.

I found myself staring at Hiei's shoes. My eyes traveled up his black-clad leg until the encountered his hips, and then I grinned sheepishly when I met his red eyes.

_Hi,_ I said without saying anything, and he scowled, lips moving as he tried to speak to me.

I shook my head, feeling myself get near the point where I needed another swallow of water, and I reached up to pull my hair—which was still there, oddly—over my shoulder to expose one side of my neck and jawline.

I looked up at him; for some reason, he appeared to have stopped breathing, jaw tight and muscle twitching in the column of his caramel throat. I smiled, teeth feeling a lot sharper than usual, and I pointed at the place where my ear was supposed to be.

Red eyes snapped open wide, trailing over my gills and un-ears with sharp crimson darts. When I saw him understand, I pushed back into the water and breathed deep. Then I resurfaced. The sun felt like it was cooking my delicate skin and my eyes burned in the light, but even though I was willing to endure the pain Hiei still knelt down at the water's edge, put his hand on the top of my head, smiled lik a shark, and shoved me back down as hard as he could. He pushed me so hard, in fact, that the water enclosed his arm all the way up to the elbow.

_That jerk!_ I thought as my face slammed into the water and dragged down the side of the pool (I ate more than one mouthful of green slime in the process). A stream of angry bubbles poured out of my mouth, and with a twist I pulled my hair out of his grasp and laid myself along the pond's floor. Grimacing in anger, I kicked my feet at the water's surface, hoping to at least splash Hiei a little. _That big, fat _jerk_!_

_I wouldn't speak that way about your rescuer if I were you,_ Hiei's voice said as a purple itch wormed its way into my brain.

_Oh great, and he's humble too,_ I thought sarcastically. _My knight in shining shark-mail has arrived at last. Just hurry up and fix me!_

For once, Hiei actually tried his hand at humor (even if it was at my expense). _But scales suit you,_ he said. _Are you sure you want that?_

_Um, I can't _talk_!_ I thought. _I can't _sing_! The Little Mermaid I most certainly am NOT!_

He was silent for a minute, gone but for the faint itch running its soft fingers around the inside of my skull. Then he said: _Focus on yourself._

I closed my eyes under the water, concentrating on an image of myself, but I was agitated and it didn't last long. Fish kept coming up to investigate my foreign expanse now that I was lying still, and their soft bodies kept brushing me in ways my lateral lines could not ignore. What was worse was that I could hardly imagine myself accurately at all.

_Um, Hiei?_ I tentatively thought.

His reply:_ Yes?_

_Remember last night, when I said I couldn't imagine my own voice?_

He did not respond, but I could feel his stern frustration simmering just out of reach.

_Same holds true for my face. Can't imagine it._

And then, as quickly as a summer shower, I could see myself: too much hair, huge eyes, a snub nose, a bony body, and my smile that was fast to emerge and just as fast to fade… my voice was there too, bright and clear and nondescript and simple. The image drowned me in itself, and with a silent cry I threw myself at it, merging with it until that clicking harmony snapped into firm place.

When I opened my eyes, I tried to breathe as a normal human would, but all that happened was a lungful of water. I surged upward, coughing as my head broke the surface and fish scattered like leaves in a wind. Lilly pads tangled with my limbs and hair as I stood and lurched to the pond's side, collapsing on the tile with heaves of labored breath.

A shadow loomed over me, blocking out the sun.

"Welcome back, Dani," said Genkai, voice rasping in my sensitive ears.

I cracked open my eyes. She and Hiei were looking at me like I was a fish out of… well, you know.

"That," I said hoarsely, "was _awesome_."

_

* * *

_

_200, 000 WORDS FOR THE WIN! THANKS FOR STICKING WITH ME THIS LONG, GUYS! Or is this too long to ask for? Oh NO!_

_Lot's of filler, but since there were five days until they went to America, I felt like it would be bad of me to just have one chapter of stuff to encompass that whole time. However, there WON'T be five chapters of filler, one for each day, because they leave for America… NEXT WEEK. Well, they get on the road, anyway. Next week's chapter will be about getting ready, then leaving, and possibly a little travel. ^^ _

_Also, Jin has an apprentice in Demon World. I started a fic about it; just haven't posted it, and won't until FT is further along. Still, it's something to look forward to for all you Jin fans. ^^Also, I'm sorry for his abrupt exit from this fic, but there's just not really a place for him as far as plot goes. He was just… extra. You'll see what I mean soon. However, he's going to show up a little nearer to the end. Yay?_

_Jay Sean's "Down" DOES have a candle light remix that is AWESOME! I don't usually like Top 40 hits ("Down" annoyed me, truthfully), but the remix was sweet and pure and a million times better than the radio dance version. And "Aqueous Transmission" is by Incubus; it's one of my favorite songs EVER! I just wish I could have worked the lyrics in. =[_

_It's also my birthday. So this is my birthday gift to... you guys? XD As of the 13__th__, I am 20 years old. I can now say "Damn teenagers!" without being a hypocrite! =D I still feel like an old lady, though. WAH! _

_The super-generous_ _Kaijin-san drew a picture of my OCs from "Fakes & Fiends" as chibis! I'm plugging the drawing in this story since I haven't updated F&F since the drawing was posted, but it's GORGEOUS and I encourage you all to check out the gloriousness that is good art. Link's on my profile. ^^THANKS, KAIJIN-SAN!_

_Also, since for SOME reason Kuwabara's banana suit got a lot of laughs, I drew a picture of it. A link to my deviantART is available on my profile. ^^ As a bonus, there's also a pic of Yusuke in a grape costume. GO NUTS._

_As always, THANK YOU SO MUCH, reviewers! I've had several wonderful conversations with a few of you since last week; thanks for being so cool. ^^Kai-Chan94, American Senpai, Pirazz, Reclun, HeeHeeHee01, DoilyRox, 9ShadowCat9, MusicFiend666, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, dude where's my spirit gun, Titch-ola, Foxgirl Ray, WorldsAngel, White Rose Fox, Double A Battery, ichixichigo, Rokkugoh, chocolateluvr13, Wings of Silver Rain, Kaiya's Watergarden, archangel fighter, AkaMizu-chan, Masuyo Shun, Katt Jeane, Koryu Elric, LadyoftheGags, colbub, NAO-chan33, Fierce, 0nfateswings, rain chant, ShadowFireFox13, and j.d.y.!_

NOTES:

**EDIT: **Got some wonderful art from Wings of Silver Rain/ThatPokemonFreak today! =D It's of Dani and some of her defining things (Koi, tree, music, among others), and I love it very much. ^^ Link is on my profile! Shower her with love!


	37. Chapter 37: White Rabbit

Future Talk

Chapter 37:

"White Rabbit"

* * *

Yusuke raised an eyebrow when I stalked past him on the porch. "What the hack happened to _you_?" he said, tracking my progress with his eyes. He was holding a slice of cake in a paper napkin in one hand; pink icing marred the side of his mouth.

I grunted by way of reply and ducked indoors. My shoes were already off—still sitting at the bottom of the pond, as it were—so the only real damage I did to the floor was drip a bit of water in my wake. Grumbling, I walked to the bathroom and stripped, throwing my sopping clothes into the hamper before scrubbing my pink and fleshy skin raw.

And my hair stank like _fish_.

Sighing as I worked mint-scented shampoo into my disgusting mane, I thought about the last few minutes. Hiei had stood there and smirked while Genkai berated me for freaking out and diving head first into her carefully cultivated pond, and when she dismissed me I made sure to flip my hair so hard that most of it caught Hiei square across the face. To my satisfaction, he had spluttered and cursed before giving me his trademark glare (I had been wondering where it went!) and flouncing off. Then I limped to the boulder, grabbed my abandoned cane, and did likewise.

The shampoo washed down the drain in a spiral of pale green suds. Finally smelling like a person again did wonders for my mood, and when I sank into the bathtub full of deliciously hot water my happiness returned in full force, as did a wave of tiredness. I was much more fatigued than I had earlier surmised.

_Ah, solitude,_ I thought, listening to the water's comforting rush. _Lovely. I've been around people far too much for far too long._

The door promptly clattered open. "Yoo-hoo!" someone sang, and my eyes popped out of my head.

Botan, grinning from ear to ear, flew into the room with a large cardboard box clutched to her chest. I wrapped my own arms around _my_ chest, going red before I remembered how common it was for people to be nude around their own sex in the bath. True to that, Botan didn't seem to notice my red face as she tugged over one of the shower stools and sat at the edge of the huge tub, humming away like an engine with bad tuning.

"I have your travel clothes!" she practically sang, ripping open the box with a sound that made my teeth grind on reflex. She yanked something huge, chocolate brown, and furry into my line of sight before cooing and rubbing the material against her cheek. Her face sank into it with plenty of room to spare.

"Is all of that… necessary?" I managed as she took out a pair of furry pants, enormous fur-lined boots, and a fur scarf. All of it was made out of the same chocolate brown pelt on the outside, and it all had the same fluffy gray fur on the inside.

"It's made out of the skins of the Makai grizzly bear," she said, "and the fur of the Makai's polar rabbit. It's the warmest thing you'll ever wear, and from what Koenma told me you're going to need every inch of it."

I winced. "That cold, huh?"

"Yes," said Botan, growing a bit more serious now that the novelty of such fuzzy clothing had lost its sparkle. "Koenma sent an operative to assess the terrain of Ryu's hiding place, and the word is that you'll be experiencing sub-zero temperatures during your trip."

I raised an eyebrow. "Doesn't that seem too easy?"

She seemed confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, how did you find Ryu so easily?" I asked. "I'd think he would go to a lot of trouble to keep his location a secret since he's a fugitive and all."

But Botan just waved her hands in dismissal. "Oh, please. The Spirit World has advanced enough technology to track down someone who left _that_ much evidence behind him."

"Evidence?"

"Oh, mm-hmm." She nodded vigorously. "The knife he left behind contained a good chunk of his spirit energy, and Kurama's binding plants drained a good bit away as well. Together it was more than enough to use to calibrate a tracking device that responds to his energy signature." She put a finger to her lip. "And Kurama's plants weakened Ryu by more than enough to keep him in one place for at least another week, for recovery purposes. By Kurama's estimate, we have a window of another nine days before we have to worry about him going on the run again."

I nodded, absorbing this. It made sense, I supposed—during the Sensui arc Botan had showcased the new and improved spirit tracker watch thing when they tried to find Hiei, and since even more time had elapsed since then I could only assume that the technology has progressed accordingly.

"Anyway, it isn't Ryu we have to worry about at this point," Botan continued, voice dropping as the gravity of the situation increased. "Seishou hasn't been spotted since he attacked you in the truck. Koenma thinks that you running him over weakened him and sent him into hiding, but Genkai is not so sure. You will all have to be on your guard in Demon World."

I smiled and lifted my hand out of the water so I could touch Botan's worried fingers. She looked up at me with grateful eyes.

"Don't worry," I said. "I've been learning how to kick butt, and the guys are all pros at this by now. We're on the offensive and we have the element of surprise, so what could go wrong?"

Botan smiled, but the look was a pained one. "They _do_ have the home field advantage."

"That didn't stop us at the hotel," I told her.

She sighed. "You're right. I'm just a worrier by nature, I guess." She stood up. "I'll put these in your room—oh, and Yusuke was looking for you. He wants you to meet him in the courtyard."

I stood up, water falling everywhere as I grabbed a towel off the nearby rack. "Oh, thanks. I'll be there soon."

She grinned, saying something about finding Yukina to see if there was any cake left, and I watched her go in trepidation.

Seishou was still out there, huh…

I walked to my room in a towel; luckily no one saw, and I changed into jeans and a hoodie before going outside. Despite the noonday sun, the wind from the north was chilling—I had hardly noticed it in the garden earlier because the place had been protected from the wind, but now, out in the open…

"Hey!" Yusuke called as I rubbed my arms through my jacket to warm myself. My toes curled in their chilly open sandals. "Dani! There you are!"

I walked down the steps and into the courtyard just as Yusuke ran up. He skittered to a stop just before he reached me, grinning, and he grabbed my wrists and pulled my hands into the air right at the level of my collarbone.

"Since we're all going to Demon World soon," he said, holding my fists in his hands to shape them into balls, "I figured I oughtta teach you how to throw a solid punch. Sound good?"

I smiled, not at all sure I would ever be able to punch to Yusuke's discriminating standards. Still, I thought the exercise might at least prove fun, so I said: "Sure."

"Cool. Now make a fist." He let go of me as I did as he requested on my own, hooking the handle of my cane over my elbow for safekeeping, and his eyes glittered as they lingered on my hands. One arched eyebrow quirked. "Oh wow, Dani. That's just sad."

I looked at my fists, not seeing whatever he was so down about. "What is?"

"Your thumb _inside_ your fist?" he said with obvious disappointment.

I shifted uncomfortably. "I thought… well, that my nails would cut my palm when I hit something, so I just…"

He snorted. "Yeah, they might cut you if they're too long, but what's worse—a broken thumb or a few little cuts?"

"Cuts," was my immediate response, and I pulled my thumb out of the rest of my fingers. "I'll trim my nails tonight, I promise."

"Good," said Yusuke. He stepped back, crossed his arms, and looked me up and down. "Now, show me your stance."

I did, not quite knowing what the heck I was doing, and with another sigh Yusuke grabbed my wrists and raised my hands up to about my collarbone. They had fallen when I shifted conversation elsewhere.

"You use your arms as shields when you fight," he said, grabbing and lifting my hands when the drifted yet again. "Keep them up at all times. And keep one foot a bit behind you for momentum and support…" He adjusted me accordingly. "There, like that. Use your good foot for the back one because it's gonna absorb the most impact, and your bad one can't take it. Turn a bit to the side so you have less target area for your opponent to hit… perfect."

In the end I felt rather silly and more than a little awkward in the weird, knock-kneed-and-pigeon-toed position, and when I raised an eyebrow at Yusuke over my hands he just laughed.

"It'll feel awkward til you get used to it," he explained, settling into a stance of his own. When he did I felt a surge of fear make my stomach flutter. Something about the pose made his whole demeanor change from helpful to threatening in an instant. "Now punch me. Don't worry about hurting me because you pretty much can't; just let one fly."

I started to, but I pulled back at the last second and lost my balance. Yusuke just raised an eyebrow as I recovered and stared at him through wide eyes.

"Where do I aim?" I asked in distress, and his hands dropped to his sides when he sighed.

"Aim for the face," he said, irritated. "Or maybe the kidneys if they're open, but that's a whole 'nother kettle of fish. Christ, have you never even _slapped_ someone?"

"Uh… not lately, no." I wiggled the elbow supporting my cane. "I usually aim for the crotch."

Yusuke winced, then rolled his eyes. "Girls," he said, mouthing the word like it was a curse, and I readied myself.

"Shut up and let me hit you," I told him, gearing up again.

"Be my guest," Yusuke said, and I took a deep breath before pushing off with my back foot and letting my fist fly forward.

Yusuke caught it with a lazy twist of his wrist. "It's like getting punched by a gnat!" he cackled.

"I'm a girl, you douche-bag," I said in my defense, but he just mimicked my sulking tone to make fun of me.

"Oh, I'm a _girl_," he simpered, letting his hands hang limp upon his wrists. "That's not an excuse. Keiko's got a slap even _I_ fear—that girl can _swing_!"

This time I raised an eyebrow. "And you like that, do you?"

He beamed, obviously proud of her reluctant girlfriend. "You bet!"

I grinned and poked him in the ribs. "Ah. I see how it is. A lady in the street, but…" I shrugged. "You know the rest."

He gave me a look that said he thought I was crazy. "Know the rest of what?"

The oddity of the king of perverts _Urameshi Yusuke_ not knowing that saying struck me. "A lady in the street but…" I began, prompting him to finish the statement, but he just seemed confused from the tips of his gelled hair to the depths of his dark eyes. My own eyes widened. "You mean you _don't_ know. Oh wow, Yusuke, that's just _sad_."

"_What's_ sad?" he demanded when I started giggling. "Wait, what's sad? What am I missing?"

"There's this saying," I chortled. "It goes something like 'she's a lady in the street but a freak in the sheets.' Dude, how can you not _know_ that?"

He blinked twice before breaking into a huge grin. "Oh wow. I like it. I like it a lot." Just then, he spotted something over my shoulder that made his smile grow ever bigger. "Hey! Kuwabara!" he yelled, cupping a hand around his mouth for volume.

I turned to find Kuwabara walking up behind me, frowning when he saw Yusuke's demented smile. It could mean nothing good and Kuwabara knew it. "What, Yusuke?" he asked, clearly not wanting to know at all.

Yusuke, however, did not pick up on that reluctance. "Get a load of this: 'She's a lady in the street but a freak in the sheets!'"

It took a minute, but eventually Kuwabara quit staring at Yusuke and went bright red across the face. "_Urameshi_!" he bellowed, hands clenching as he punctuated the name with a stomp. "That's awful!"

Yusuke threw up his hands and pointed at me. "Hey, blame _her_! _She_ came up with it!"

"Dani?" Kuwabara said in disbelief, and he turned his glare on me. "Dani! That's _terrible_!"

I plugged my ears with my thumbs. "La la la, can't hear you."

"I can't believe this," Kuwabara was fuming. "You two are both perverts! I would expect that from _you_, Yusuke, but Dani—"

"Expect what?" Botan said as the temple door slid open with a clatter.

"Botan!" Yusuke said, practically shooting light out of his eyes. "Good, you're here! Listen to what Dani came up with!"

"I didn't come up with it!" I protested, but no one heard as Botan skipped toward us with a quizzical look on her face.

"She's a lady in the street but a freak in the sheets!" Yusuke crowed. "Isn't it just _great_?"

Botan's hands flew to her mouth even as her cheeks went pink. "_Dani_!" she said, totally aghast as she turned her magenta eyes my way. "You're a _pervert_!"

"Oh, can it," I snapped at all of them. "It's just an innuendo and we're all adults. You'll all live."

"But, but it's terrible," Kuwabara protested.

I gave him my best '_Really now? Really?'_ face. "Oh, trust me, I could say worse," I said in as dry a tone as I could muster.

Yusuke, had he been a dog, would have perked up his ears. "Do it!" he exclaimed, face bright. "Do it, do it!"

I gave him a stern look, and then in a very solemn voice I spoke the phrase that more or less defined my generation.

I said: "That's what _she_ said."

Yusuke's grin broke in half. He stared at me, shocked, then pulled his head back and looked at me like I'd told him I was actually a man.

Kuwabara, if it was possible, had gone even redder. Botan had put her hands to her cheeks.

Yusuke, however, just started laughing hysterically once the shock wore off, bent over from the waist so he could put his hands on his knees for support. "You know, I take back what I said about you being stuck up," Yusuke said, eyes streaming as he looked up at me. "You're _funny_."

I raised an eyebrow. "You said I was stuck up?"

He froze. "Uh…"

I tossed my head. "Fine, fine, whatever: I'm a stuck up pervert. Now can we all get on with our lives, pretty please?"

After a few minutes of continued laughter (by Yusuke) and admonishments (by Botan and Kuwabara), Kuwabara stalked off muttering about being surrounded by pervs and Botan jogged off talking about needing a good long massage to relieve her mounting tension, and Yusuke and I were alone again.

"Well, that was entertaining," he said, chipper.

I looked at him pointedly. "That's what _she_ said."

He made a face that was a cross between pleased and horrified—really, he was quite good at it. "Now I think I'm getting it," he said, grinning from ear to ear.

"It can make any conversation less boring," I assured him. "And it's not the hard, really."

His smile grew even broader as he started shifting from foot to foot so fast that his legs blurred. "That's what _she_ said!" he yelled. "_She_ said it, _she_ said it!"

"That she did," I agreed, and when Yusuke finally calmed down he looked at me with new respect… which I didn't know if I liked or not, considering where it came from.

A crabby voice cut through my rising dread. "What are you two doing?" Genkai snapped, and when I turned I saw her standing on the porch. She had changed out of her clothes from earlier, probably smelling like fish herself after helping me crawl out of the pond. Her hair even seemed damp—was there another bathroom she could have bathed in?

Yusuke looked like a cat that had been caught with feathers in its teeth. "Oh nothing, grandma, just teaching Dani how to punch is all," he said, holding up his hands in a please-don't-hit-me gesture. His nervous laugh didn't do him any favors, though.

"Hmph. Good luck with that," Genkai said, eyes closing while she laughed. "Teaching that one to fight would be like trying to bungee jump with a wet rag."

"Hey," I said, protesting without much conviction. I knew she was right even if it hurt.

She took a step towards up, hitting the stairs and then the courtyard at a stately walk. "Well it's true."

"Doesn't mean you have to insult me," I muttered, and Yusuke gave me a sympathetic look.

Genkai, however, just went on talking. "In Demon World you're going to be nothing but a liability, Dani. You're slow and weak and delicate, and—"

"Hey, I've been working on the slow part," I said, trying to tell her something to stop her flying criticism. "I can't run around or anything, but I think I should be able to move faster than I do with my cane."

Genkai's eyes narrowed. "And you didn't tell me about this, why?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "It hadn't come up?"

Her despairing sigh made me wince. "Well, it came up today. Show me."

I stared at her. "B-but I'm exhausted!" I said, holding out my hands in supplication. "I don't know if I can manage a shapeshift after this morning."

Yusuke, who had been looking back and forth between us with subtle darts of his eyes, said: "What happened this morning?"

"I turned into a fish," I said, keeping it simple, and his entire face lit up.

"So that's why you were all wet when I saw you earlier!" he said. His expression turned interested. "So did you manage to fix your leg or something?"

There was nothing to do but shake my head. "That's… beyond me." I put on a brave front. "But I can do this other thing that's pretty cool, too."

"Like I said," said Genkai. "_Show me_."

Another protest in the form of: "But this morning—"

"—was this morning and right now is right now," Genkai snapped, eyes flashing. "Show me!"

"All right, all right," I griped, and I held out my cane in Yusuke's direction. He took it with a look of confusion, a look that only grew more intense when I stripped my sweatshirt off over my head.

"Dude, you're stripping!" he said, voice climbing an octave, and I just blew a ton of air out my mouth. My bangs fluffed up from the force.

"Only down to my t-tanktop," I said, hugging my arms around myself as a gust of chill wind set my hair to flying. My lips suddenly felt chapped when I started gnawing on them. "G-gotta get to theta," I said to my audience, tipping them a shuddering wink, and I closed my eyes and started humming.

I hummed 'Little Wing', the first song I had ever heard by Jimi Hendrix, and soon enough I became lost in that bluesy tune. I let it punctuate each croon of my soul's voice as it instructed my arm to grow, grow, grow, grow, and when I felt the gentle push of my arm obeying me, I let my eyes crack open to the sound of a hushed voice.

"That is the freakiest looking thing I have _ever_ seen," Yusuke was saying, and I looked down.

My arm had increased in length by about two and a half times, just long enough for my palm to lay flat on the ground and still have length enough to bend about thirty degrees at the bony elbow, all thin and spindly and long. It still looked kind of gross despite how everything about it was proportional, for a lanky giant, anyway.

"Interesting," said Genkai when I took two steps forward, using the extended arm as a crutch I could more easily control than a nerveless cane. "But it looks weak."

I grinned at her, lurching in circles more quickly than I ever could with the cane.

"Herp," Yusuke said, cheeks paling as he put a hand over his mouth. When I stared at him quizzically, he took a deep breath and said: "Sorry. Kinda made me nauseous there."

"Thanks," I snipped. I looked at Genkai. "I can fix the delicacy issue."

"Less talk, more action," Genkai said, and I paused long enough to go back into theta.

This time, even though I was using the thrumming "Little Wing" as a base, I whispered a different tune to my arm. However, I spoke more to my muscles than I did to my bones, and with a crack or two I felt my tendons creek under the strain of my expanding flesh. That done, I whispered to the bones I had neglected and my shoulder twitched and jerked and cracked open, turning into something strong and thick and muscular and whole…

"I take it back—_that_ is the freakiest thing I've ever seen."

I glared at Yusuke as soon as I returned to my senses. My shoulder was huge, looking like I had sprouted a second head or something. It strained against the loop of my tank top's arm, but the entire arm had increased its mass until it looked like someone had transplanted a giant's arm where mine used to be. With a powerful surge of my new muscles I rocketed forward a step, but then I overbalanced because my good leg just couldn't keep up with my new arm.

"Needs some work," Genkai observed as I sat fallen on the ground, frustrated at my lack of coordination. "Practice. You'll need to keep a good pace in Demon World." She paused, thinking. "Since your body is a demon's, the Demon World atmosphere won't kill you. Probably."

My jaw dropped as she turned and started walking back to the porch.

"Probably?" I finally managed to blurt out. "_Probably_? What do you mean, _probably_?"

She turned, one foot on the first step. "The atmosphere in Demon World is poisonous to humans," she said in the voice of a jaded lecturer. "It gives them a wracking cough before putting them into a deep coma, and eventually they die of suffocation or starvation."

"Hey, I survived," Yusuke said.

The psychic shot him a tired look. "Yes, but you're a special case," Genkai said. "Your demon blood protected you." She turned back to me. "Enhanced spiritual awareness can also limit the poison's effects, but only for a while. All humans succumb eventually."

"So… probably?" I asked again.

"I mean that your soul is a human's and therefore you might be susceptible to the toxins in the air," Genkai said. "I don't think it will, but there's always a chance." She thought about it. "An small shield made of your spirit energy could filter the air if the need arose."

"Will you teach me?" I asked instantly, and Genkai glared.

"Do you expect me to hand you _everything_ on a silver platter?" she snapped, wheeling around and stalking into the house. "Where's the experimenter who practiced in secret only a week ago?"

My cheeks started to burn. "Sorry," I said, not knowing what else to say, and Genkai 'humphed' before disappearing from sight.

"That's rough, man," Yusuke remarked. "But hey, at least she thinks you're smart enough to figure out that shield on your own."

I looked at him, not knowing if he was speaking the truth, but he seemed sincere enough. "Do you really think so?" I asked.

"Sure," Yusuke said. "The old hag never let _me_ try some of her techniques on my own." He paused. "Then again, you don't have much to learn from her. Your powers and hers aren't the same at all."

I stared down at my feet, concentrating for a second on returning my arm to normal. When it shrunk back into place, I held out my hand for my cane. Yusuke returned it with a grin.

"She sure did teach me a lot for someone who doesn't share my abilities," I murmured. "That makes me feel pretty stupid."

"Eh, she has that effect on people," Yusuke said, shrugging. "But if she taught you the basics, you can bet she's given you everything you need to go places." He flexed his bicep and grinned so hard his eyes almost closed. "Just look at me! I'm awesome!"

I smiled at him softly.

"Yeah," I said. "You pretty much are."

* * *

That night I practiced walking, then almost-running, with my oversized and misshapen arm. It was hard to do in my tiny room, but I was determined to make Genkai proud by giving it all I had, and after an hour of repetition I could complete at least five swinging steps without falling flat on my face.

Feeling good about that and resolving to do more the next day out in the open, I set about making myself a shield.

It was hard to create a steady field of energy for a prolonged period of time—I realized, as I tried to form an energy web between my two outstretched hands, that all of my work until that point had been in bursts. A burst of energy to twist my body into shape, a surge of it to channel music into a shape, a jolt to take in the essence of another creature… never anything so drawn out. It pulled so much of my energy reserves out of myself that I began to despair and drift to sleep as the hours dragged on in my lonely room, but eventually I decided that the best route to take would be the one I considered last, and that route was the musical route.

I went through much trial and error, let me tell you. First I tried weaving a net with music, and when I affixed that musical net over my face I sprayed myself with a bottle of perfume I had bought on my long-ago trip to Sakana. It got in my mouth and nose and eyes, however, letting me know that my filter was totally unaffected.

Second, I used music to form an illusion—a haze like one you'd see on a hot day—made of low, buzzing notes that skimmed the air like a filter, but when I sprayed a bottle of body mist into my haze-wrapped face it still got in my mouth and nose.

"Fine," I decided after rinsing out my mouth in the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror above the sink, seeing my tired eyes with their fatigued glaze dart across my own face in agitation. "Fine. If you want to get literal, I'll get literal. A gas mask it is."

I went back to my room in a vague aura of temper gone bad, and when I slammed my door behind myself I breathed a deep sigh before collapsing onto my futon. Lying still and breathing steady, I let myself drop into theta like a stone into a pond, and then I began plucking music from the air.

The first strain I pulled up reflected the basic essence of a gas mask. Alien looking, somewhat intimidating, and altogether dark with wide, gaping eyes, I let the music reflect the way looking at someone's face hidden in the gothic item made me feel. Soon enough I began pulling smaller notes to flesh the image out, and when I had an almost perfect image of a gas mask in my mind, I turned my focus to its function.

I set the mask score aside for a moment and began to weave small, decisive, and picky notes into a sharp net, one which only let goodness in but chased away the bad like a cat chases a dog. When I wove that net as tightly as I could, pulling it so taut I thought it might break, I gently fitted it inside the mask melody, superimposing them and meshing them together so that the mask's larger melody was enhanced and under wrought by the all-important filter song.

When I woke up, the mask was sitting on my chest.

Rather than revel in it, though, I let my tiredness overtake me. With one small smile at the mask I took a deep, trembling breath, grabbed it, and rolled onto my side.

With the mask resting in the enclave formed by the curl of my body, I slept.

The next two days passed in a blur. Packing bags, getting clothes ready, practicing my mask and my shifts and my walk, it wasn't long before I fell asleep the night before the morning we were to leave this place behind for something new.

* * *

That night, I dreamed.

Koenma was there for only a few moments at the dream's outset. His dark eyes were haggard, worse than they had been the last time we talked, and before the dream descended into the normal madness he gave me a tight hug.

"I'm weakening," he told me. "The Beasts are close, catching on. I must conserve myself. I only have a few more contacts left."

I pressed my face into his shirt. "I think I knew that already," I told him.

"Stay alive," he said, pushing me from him. His eyes were soft on mine. "For both of us."

I shook my head. "Don't talk like that. I'll see you again."

When I looked up he was gone, lost in a miasma of nothing and everything at once.

* * *

I stared at myself in the mirror, horrified. "I can't go out looking like _this_," I said in disbelief.

Botan, behind me, just squealed. "You look so cute!" she said.

"You're only saying that because you're not the one wearing it," I said, tugging at the muffler around my neck. "Look, I can't even put my arms to my sides. That's just sad."

"It's practical," Botan chided. "Now here's your pack—" she lifted my arms and slipped it over them and onto my back, "—and you're dressed and prepared and well rested and totally ready to go. Right?"

"I'm prepared to look like an idiot," I deadpanned, and then I sighed. I could hardly feel the press of my cane through my thick fur gloves. "Let's just get this over with."

Botan and I walked out of the bathroom and into the hall, me with a frown and her with a grin befitting a proud mother. I was sweating by the time we got onto the porch and saw the others—everyone minus Genkai, that is—standing about, and when Botan opened the door all their heads swiveled around to look at us.

"We're here!" she warbled, and everyone started staring at me.

Kuwabara was the first to laugh, a low muffled groan that he quickly stifled with his hands. Kurama started smiling next, Hiei's eyes got wide, and Yukina put her hands to her mouth as her eyebrows rose. But it was Yusuke who started pointing and howling, freaking out as I waddled down the steps in pants and a jacket that were too thick to allow me free range of movement.

"Now that's not very nice!" Botan exclaimed.

I knew I looked a fright. My hood had so much fur lining it that my face was hardly visible at all, my hands were doughy mitts of fur and skin, and I'm sure my glare only made things look worse.

"All right," I said, tired of the impending jokes already. "Get it out now. Just get used to it because it's not going away." I slouched when I walked over to join them. "And any jokes about Eskimo kisses will be met with a slap."

"_What_ kisses?" Botan asked as she followed me down.

"Eskimo…" I sighed, turning to her as I remembered that those only existed in Alaska. Which was in America. Shit. "People native to cold climates," I said.

Her head tilted to the side. "And their kisses are different?"

"Well, yeah, their mouths would freeze together in the cold…" I trailed off, uncomfortable when I remembered we had an audience. "Why are you so interested?" I asked sullenly, glancing at everyone else. Yusuke was still laughing on the ground, Hiei was pretending not to be listening, and Kurama was smiling in amusement.

She fidgeted. "Oh, you know," she said, trying to play it off.

"Only _you_ would know crap about kisses, Dani," Kuwabara chortled as he came to stand beside me and Botan.

I growled at him: "For the last time, I am _not_ a _pervert_!" I looked at Botan, reached out, and in a stroke of utter brilliance decided to freak out Kuwabara. "Or maybe I am," I joked with a wink, and I yanked Botan toward me so I could rub the tip of my nose across hers.

She yelped, not expecting the cutsie-wootsie action, and when I let her go she stumbled backward and pointed dramatically at my face.

"What is the heck was _that_?" she screeched.

Kuwabara yelled: "See! I _told_ you!"

"It was just an Eskimo kiss," I said innocently. "What? It's not bad."

"What are you doing?"

The three of us jumped and turned, watching as Genkai walked out of the temple and paced toward us.

"Just showing Botan some American culture," I said sweetly.

"Well too late now," Genkai snapped. "I just received word from Koenma—the passageway to Demon World will be opening in an hour. You need to leave now if you're going to make it in time." She looked me up and down when she reached us. "Nice clothes."

"Ha ha, very funny," I said, and Yusuke finally got off the ground.

"Well, I finally got that out," he said, but he still had to stifle a giggle when he looked at me. I realized, then, that each of the guys was wearing an outfit very similar to my own—coats with hoods (though theirs were down), fur pants, gloves, mufflers, the works. But they all looked svelte and fit in their clothes, whereas I looked like the Pillsbury Dough Boy, and that was if I was being nice. "No use standing around here. Let's go."

"Yukina, I shall return a stronger man," Kuwabara said, taking the startled ice apparition's hands into his own.

She smiled sweetly. "I'll pray for your safety," she said, and she removed herself and bowed to the rest of us. "Good luck, everyone."

"Thanks," most of us chorused. I saw Hiei's eyes linger on her before he turned away, but then Botan pulled me into her arms and hugged me into her boobs without a care.

"Oh, I don't care that you're a pervert," she said a little tearfully. "I just hope you come home safely. Promise me you will!"

"I will!" I said, voice muffled in her chest, and she pushed me away.

"Oh, and Yusuke!" she cried, running to him and Kuwabara and everyone else in turn. She even managed to rope Hiei into a handshake, somehow, and then she dashed off with a tissue in her hand. "I can't take goodbyes, so goodbye!" she called, and without another glance she dashed into the house, blowing her nose in histrionics. Yukina followed after with another bow, and then it was just me, the boys, and Genkai.

Genkai reached into her pocket after the girls left, and from it she took a wristwatch with a black face. There was one diamond-shaped dial, half black and half white, centered on the black circle.

"This is tuned directly to Ryu's energy," Genkai said. She handed it to Yusuke with a glare. "Break it and I'll kill you."

"Yes ma'am," he said, sighing, and he turned. "Now let's just go. I'm just as bad at goodbyes as Botan."

"I agree," Kurama said, and he and Yusuke started walking off. Kuwabara waved at Genkai and trotted after, but it was actually Hiei who stayed with me until after I had approached Genkai with a hesitant smile.

"I figured out the gas mask," I told her hopefully, and I was rewarded with a small smile. The look made me feel warm despite the cold wind that was rushing by.

"Good girl," she said, and she slapped me lightly on the arm. "Don't get killed." Her eyes flickered to Hiei's. "And you watch her," she said to him. "She'll get in trouble without a babysitter."

"I know," he said, glancing at me, and then he turned away. "Come on," he said, and with one last smile at Genkai I let him lead me into the forest. The temple faded away as the trees closed in around us, and as I felt the birdsong swim into my ears as I stared at the place between Hiei's shoulder blades I felt a quiet sense of unease undercut my nerves.

Why did I feel like Alice all of a sudden, and why did Hiei seem like some solemn White Rabbit, bent on leading me deep into a place unknown?

* * *

"So is there a… portal, or something?" I asked after a good hour had passed. I was grasping at fanfiction clichés, honestly, because all we had done was walk into the woods and that didn't seem like a climactic entrance into Demon World at all. Frankly, I was a little disappointed.

Kurama glanced at me over his shoulder. A sudden gust of wind made me rock sideways in my path, and my foot stung as its thick boot chafed against my heel. My shoulder was cramping up, too, from leaning on my cane for too long.

"Of course," Kurama said in his soothing voice. "We've been walking through it for the last hour."

I almost stopped walking, so shocked was I. Kuwabara—who had been walking behind me—almost bumped into my back. "We have?" I asked in disbelief, and Kurama nodded without breaking stride.

"Yes," he said. Yusuke, walking at the front of our group, snorted at my stupidity. "Rifts often open between the worlds at random, allowing features of both worlds to bleed into one another." He shot me a sideways glance, but he undercut his rather condescending words with an understanding smile. "This rift, however, was scheduled. Soon we'll come out on the other side. "

"Oh." I looked around me with fresh eyes; the coniferous trees seemed the same as always, but now that he mentioned it they looked bigger than usual, with blue-green needles and almost silvery bark, the color of hematite or burnished pewter.

"I can feel it coming up," Kuwabara said suddenly. His words sent a shiver through me, one that did not have much to do with the biting cold around us. "Demon World."

His feelings made sense, because all around us the world was… changing.

"Um, guys?" I said when snow began to fall. "Do you guys… see what I'm seeing?"

We stopped walking as one, looking into the trees warily, and when we saw _them_ we froze.

I was the first to think of something worth saying.

"I knew," I said solemnly, "that _they_ would take over some day."

_

* * *

_

NOTES:

_Who took over? WHO? Or… WHAT?_

_Dunno why I did the whole "Dani is a perv" thing. It just... hit me. Ah, well, next chapter will be actiony._

_KRRIB drew some awesome Dani art! Links on my profile-check it out because I LOVE IT, especially Dani's expression! Really, everyone who's drawn something has been fantastic. ^^_

_And we're in America. Finally. Action? Yes. Soon. Like, next week. Sweeeet._

_LOVELY REVIEWERS ARE LOVELY: Reclun, Misuzu-PM, dude where's my spirit gun, Nats the Magnificent, Doily Rox, 0nfateswings, MusicFiend666, Koryu Elric, Raging Lulu, American Senpai, rain chant, ichixichigo, j.d.y., Sarah Jackson—The Other, Foxgirl Ray, Kaiya's Watergarden, Kai-chan94, LadyoftheGags, chocolateluvr13, wickedlovelydream, AkaMizu-chan, WingsofSilverRain, mosinger, colbub, ComicXArena, Rokkugoh, Katt Jeane, Turtle Kid, Libby (feel better!), double a battery, masuyo shun, DarlingSM, Ghost in Progress, Worlds Angel!_


	38. Chapter 38: Put Yo' Hood Up

This was posted early tonight because I have to wake up at 4 AM to get out of town. Eek!

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 38:

"Put Yo' Hood Up"

* * *

As soon as we noticed what was going on we froze, and that's when I really _noticed_ the world around us. I mean, I'd been aware of it before, but now I was thinking about it and that made it all the more real.

And the realist part about it was the _cold_.

It drove beneath my clothes, worming into the miniscule gap between the edges of my cheeks and the furry rim of my coat's thick hood. I could feel it pouring like water into the tops of my boots and saturating my socks, flowing up my sleeves to penetrate the layers of shirts beneath, permeating my fur pants at the waistband and then worm its way into the blue jeans I wore beneath them.

Botan had been right—I needed every last layer of my embarrassingly fluffy clothes, but it _still wasn't enough._

However, even though the cold was so intense that it seemed to settle into the marrow of my bones like so much liquid cement, making my joints lock up and shudder as they tried to shake themselves back into limberness, I realized that there was no wind, probably because we were surrounded by dense forest. The trees were bigger all of a sudden, with trunks of burnished silver that I couldn't wrap my arms around even if there were two of me to share that task, and their branches wove together in a tapestry so thick that it was impossible to see the sky. Our entire world was filtered with a dingy green light, doubtless one made by the trees interacting with the ambient light above the forest. However, as I looked around myself even as I tried to burrow deeper into my second furry skin, I noticed that it was actually _snowing_ despite the lack of sky above.

My brow furrowed—snow was falling in gentle eddies of powder-fine ice, piling up at the bases of the trees around us in small drifts, coating out shoulders with small white patches that drifted away when we moved. It seemed impossible for there to be snow in this environment without a sky, and as I looked into the dark branches above us…

I gasped. "Whoa!"

Everyone looked up, but it was Yusuke who picked up on my object of fascination. He let out a low whistle. "Well would ya look at that," he jested, hands shoved in his pockets.

The snow, in an amazing feat of the Demon World's odd laws of physics, was forming out of thin air. Barely transparent clouds of effervescent silver swirled up by the thin needles of the leaves that sprouted from the trees, and from these barely-there clouds fell the odd snow.

"It's so cold that the water vapor freezes this close to the ground," Kurama said. His breath misted before his face, forming a cloud just like the ones above, and as I watched a small portion of snow formed from the mists of his spent breath. It dusted his shoes with what looked like powdered sugar. "_They_ must be providing the moisture necessary to form the clouds."

There was no need to clarify who 'they' was.

Kurama regained his wits quickly enough. "It won't do to stand here," he murmured loud enough for us all to hear, and we started walking, footsteps sticking with hollow whumphs against the rising cushion of snow beneath our feet.

And above us, thousands of eyes watched.

"Why the hell are there so _many_ of them?" Kuwabara muttered. "We just came out of freaking Japan."

I was walking behind him, though only by a few paces. My cane kept sinking into the inch-thick layer of snow, making it hard for me to keep up, but I still managed to puff out the words: "Do you not have squirrels in Japan?"

As if on cue, the hundreds of creatures in the branches above us chattered as one, and fell silent. I heard Hiei grumble behind my back, a low 'cheh' sound he forced out from between his teeth.

Kuwabara glanced at me over his shoulder before turning to face forward again. "We have them in Honshu, but only in really remote places," he said. "I've only seen one a few times."

"Oh," I said, breathlessly because of how hard it was to trek through the snow—seriously, it was awful.

"Were there this many where you lived, Dani?" he asked, glancing up at the rodents in the trees. They had small black eyes and tails as long as my forearm and as thick as my wrist, with fat little bodies and cute little ears that rose to tufted points on either side of their heads. Brown fur that faded to gray at the tips, black claws that curled like pencil shavings, and they would have been pretty much adorable had there not been so damn _many_ of them watching us walk through their tree-filled domain.

"Not _this_ many," I mumbled, watching as the masses writhed over one another like a furry ocean. Two broke away from the bigger pack and clambered down a tree trunk, coming to rest a few feet away from us to stare, sitting up on their haunches like prairie dogs. I was so busy staring at them that I stumbled over a tree root hidden by all the snow, but I recovered before I hit the ground and tried to keep a brave face.

"You gonna be able to keep up?" Kuwabara asked, and I nodded even though I wasn't sure.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and stopped walking, startled to find Hiei gripping me through the thick layer of fur on my shoulder. His red eyes glanced at my feet before locking on my face, and he called: "Kurama." He, unlike me, wasn't shivering at all, even despite the face that his clothes seemed substantially less thick than mine, and his boots were his usual pair and not some ultra-fortified pair like my own.

Kurama stopped walking, and since Kuwabara was behind him he stopped walking, too, and they both turned to stare at Hiei and I. But Yusuke, way out in front, kept going until he realized we weren't keeping up, and he backtracked with an embarrassed scowl.

"Switch with me," Hiei demanded of Kurama, and then he looked at Kuwabara. "You walk behind Yusuke."

"Huh?" Kuwabara said. "Why?"

Kurama's eyes narrowed, but then his lips quirked into a ghost of a smile. "Do as he says, Kuwabara," he said slowly, and when he and Hiei passed each other he shot Hiei a very knowing look. "Don't tax yourself," he murmured, and Hiei snorted.

"Not likely," he snapped.

I, being pretty much the only one not in the know, frowned and asked: "What the heck is going on?"

Hiei stared, eyes flicking to my feet, and turned away. I tried to burn a hole in the cloth between his shoulder blades with my eyes, but I had little success.

Kurama, behind me, chuckled.

Up front, Yusuke called: "We done yet?"

"Carry on, Yusuke," Kurama said smoothly, and we started walking again: Yusuke taking point, Kuwabara behind him, then Hiei, then me, with Kurama bringing up the rear guard.

Hiei's little plan, however, was immediately apparent. It only took me about ten paces to notice that the snow Hiei walked through was less dense than it had been before, and as we travelled it turned into little more than watery sludge. Walking was so much better now that the snow couldn't resist my weak feet and my cane.

My eyes fastened to his feet, and as I studied them I realized that they were cutting through the snow like hot knives, carving out holes I tried to match my stride to so walking would be even easier. I felt less tired all of a sudden, awed when I noticed the way the air was suddenly a few blessed degrees warmer when it streamed back from Hiei's body.

_He's using his own heat to make this easier on me,_ I thought in equal parts awe and jealousy. _It must be nice to be a fire demon._

However, a darker part of me resented that I needed to be taken care of in such a way, but I tried not to think about that.

I caught him glance at me over his shoulder once, checking to see if I was OK (or maybe he was checking to see if I had noticed his efforts; that arrogance would certainly be within his character), and I smiled my biggest smile ever. I was going to indulge that arrogance even at the cost of my own pride, because the cold was seriously getting to me and at this point my pride was a small price to pay for warmth.

"Thank you," I said earnestly, and he smirked through sleepy eyes.

"It's nothing," he said in a way that dripped with self-satisfied confidence, and I rolled my eyes.

"Nothing for _you_," I murmured.

Kurama chuckled again.

* * *

We were still trekking through the forest the first time Yusuke made us stop so he could read his Ryu-tracking-watch, rolling back his thick sleeve to glance at the small device through narrowed eyes. Snow powdered his hair before he tossed his head back to stare up at the trees and the watching squirrels.

"We need to go this way," he said, still looking upward even as he pointed a little to the right of the direction we had already been heading. "We were supposed to reach the edge of this forest by now, but it doesn't look like it's thinning at all." He lowered his head to look at Hiei. "Would you mind taking a look around up top?"

Hiei, strangely enough, turned to me. I had been standing pretty close to him, more or less huddling inside the bubble of warmth his presence provided, and when our eyes met I took a step backward.

"What?" I asked crossly, and his smirked appeared.

"Try not to freeze to death," he commanded, and before I could even blink he was gone, a slight wind brushing over my face to announce his departure. The squirrels screamed and scattered into the braches, but then they resurfaced when it seemed that Hiei had moved on.

For a second after he left, the warmth stayed in place. Then, however, the cold came crashing back in, and I shivered so violently that I bit my tongue. My arms went around myself on reflex.

Kuwabara, a few paces in front of where Hiei had been, also started shivering. "Freaking radiator boy had better come back quick," he said, lips puckering. "Damn, but it's cold!"

"You and Dani are getting the worst of it, I'm afraid," Kurama said regretfully. "Yusuke, Hiei, and I are all of hardier make."

"B-but Dani's body is a demon!" Kuwabara protested, and I glared at him.

"You mean, 'Dani's body is allegedly a demon's'," I corrected. "E-even Genkai th-thinks I might react badly to this atmosphere."

In a flash, Kurama was standing in front of me. "She said that?" he inquired a bit more forcefully than usual, and I flinched back from the intensity of his bright eyes. Hair fell from the safety of his hood to frame his cheeks.

"Yes. But I-I came prepared," I said, a new wave of shudders turning my speech to mush. My lips felt too chapped to move. "S-she wanted me to b-be prepared."

Kurama glanced at Yusuke and Kuwabara before looking at me. "Kuwabara has proven his ability to withstand this atmosphere before," he said. "Strong psychics often are immune. You, however, have neither a good track record nor a particularly strong spirit. At the first sign of any sickness, guard yourself. Once the symptoms set in, it's hard to recover."

"I'll b-be careful," I said, shifting my feet and cane, and suddenly there came a 'thump' from behind Kurama just as the squirrels started screeching. Needles of leaves rained down as they panicked in the trees above.

Hiei had returned, and his face was drawn. "A kilometer or so away, the forest breaks," he said as Kurama turned to look at him. "There is a plain for another kilometer or so. It should prove easy to cross." He turned on his heel. "We walk, now."

"Finally," said Yusuke with a sigh, and we began anew.

* * *

The squirrels followed us, keeping us company with their skittering claws and constant chatter. They grew bolder as we walked beneath their squirming canopy, coming down more and more often to stand at the bases of the trees, cocking heads in our direction and scolding Yusuke when he aimed a mock Spirit Gun their way.

"Do you think Ryu's using them as spies or something?" Kuwabara grumbled at one point, and everyone either smirked or chuckled at the thought.

"I wouldn't put it past the little rat," Yusuke said, watching them. "D'ya think they're got some freaky powers from being here for so long?"

"Well, they _are_ a big bigger than most of the squirrels back where I lived," I told them. Since Hiei and his warmth had come back, I was able to speak without chopping off my own tongue. "Maybe they're smarter or something."

"They're rodents; nothing more," Hiei snapped, and I was about to reply when Yusuke held up a hand. We all stopped as one, tensing as he stood there in contemplation, and when he lowered his hand I let myself relaxed.

He turned to us with a beaming smile. "I can see light up ahead," he said, excitement tingeing his voice, and he broke into a jog. "C'mon!"

No one said anything as we broke into a jog (or, in my case, a hurried, jerking walk) toward light I could not see. Yusuke had eagle eyes, apparently, but as Yusuke and Kuwabara gained ground, leaving Hiei, Kurama, and myself in their relative dust, I started to see a brighter sort of green marring the dimmer color everywhere else. The squirrels, above us, kept pace with our stride, and when we finally saw a sliver of a gap—one filled with harsh gray light—between the trunks of two gigantic trees, Hiei ran out ahead. Kurama, however, kept to his spot just behind me, and so the two of us walked out of the forest at almost the same time.

What I saw shocked me.

Before us lay an open, hilly landscape that stood in sharp contrast to the secluded forest. Dense earth coated in a layer of short, dun-colored grass the consistency of fur, packed and rimed with ice that crunched under my boots reflected harsh light that came from no discernible source. The sky was the same grey tone as the ground, making it hard to draw the line between horizon and the hills rising up before us. My eyes stung, squinting at the odd brightness that wasn't really bright at all, and as I stared I felt the first rush of wind strip by. The force of it blew my hood straight off, exposing my neck to the sudden chill and making my eyes water and my ears burn, filled with the hollow roar of the freezing gale. I yelped, tucking my cane over my elbow as I grabbed at the hood with mittened hands, but it was Kurama who came up behind me and helped put my shield back in place.

"You will need this more than ever," he said, voice raised to overcome the rushing wind. He tugged on the two ties that made the hood's face hole constrict, leaving only my eyes and nose exposed. "Stay with Hiei. You'll freeze to death otherwise."

Since speaking was more or less impossible thanks to my hood, I merely nodded.

Yusuke had dashed about thirty meters ahead of us, resting on the crest of the small hill on the base of which we stood, and he was staring down at his wrist. Eventually he pointed off to our right.

"We've gotta go that way!" he yelled. His hood flew off his head; he pulled it back on with a scowl and tightened it until all but his eyes showed through. "Well, come on!"

Kuwabara yanked his hood on, too. Hiei, however, did not as we all started after Yusuke, and I got as close to him as possible as the wind tried to knock me off my feet. His warmth all but blew away now that we were out in the open, but I could still feel it just the smallest bit and even that was enough to make me stick to him like glue.

I thought to look back as we started to climb the little knoll. To my surprise, a squadron of squirrels stood on the ground, watching us leave with beady little eyes. They seemed tense, like they were afraid for our safety on our journey to parts unknown.

_Come back,_ they seemed to say. _We can be happy here. We have nuts for all._

I waved at them in a fit of whimsy.

I wasn't fazed when they seemed to wave right back.

* * *

We climbed the first hill only to find a score more waiting for us. They rose off into the distance for miles, or so it seemed, because even though we had only a kilometer or two to go as the crow flies, the hills made the distance seem twice as long. My already cold-stiffened legs seemed to burn and thrum with every aching step, and it felt like hours went by before Yusuke said: "Hiei, what comes after this?"

Hiei, before me, did not reply.

"You said this went on for a kilometer, so what comes after?" he went on. He didn't seem winded at all, damn him, while I was puffing like a chimney.

"You won't like it," Hiei said bluntly, not mincing any words at all, and just as he said it we crested the top of what was to be our final hill.

Before us lay yet another landscape, only this one was twice as ominous as the creepy forest and the desolate plains. I catalogued its features as we all regarded it in silence, marking the way the hill we stood on sloped downward to terminate in a rocky strip of beach that bordered a strange body of water.

But, before I go describing that water, let me add that the rocky beach stretched away from us in two directions, gently curving like a crescent moon, only one half of this moon also curved upward to form a gigantic craggy cliff that overhung the water like a nun in Catholic school. The water itself stretched so far away from us that you could hardly see the bank of its opposite shore, and it glittered like malicious silver as it churned a writhed beneath the sky that had no sun. I could hardly look at it for fear of going blind.

"Guess we're not swimming across that," Kuwabara muttered.

"But we gotta get across," Yusuke said as he looked at his tracker. "Ryu's on the other side."

The water went on for miles in either direction, so if we were to go around it the journey would likely take weeks. Kurama echoed my thoughts: "The river is strong here, and deep," he said. "It does not look like it ends for a good while."

"So we _have_ to swim it," Yusuke said. "Gee, that's just great. Anybody have a trick to crossing _whirlpools_?"

I counted seven swirling pools of water that marred the surface of the river: seven gigantic spirals at least a quarter mile in diameter and an eighth of a mile deep in the depths of their basins. Staring at them spinning made me feel ill, like I was getting sucked into them despite the fact that I was many meters away.

"Let's get closer and investigate," Kurama suggested, and we moved down to the rocky beach with slumped shoulders. The wind only got worse as we neared the water, no doubt kicked up by the tumultuous whirlpools, but I noticed that it had at least stopped snowing by the time our feet began crunching over gravel. I also picked up on the long reeds growing in the shallows by the shore—a thick mire of cat tails, the type with fuzzy hot-dogs at the tops of their stems, went on for a good fifty or so feet before flat water took command.

"Wonder how deep it is past those reeds," Kuwabara said. "I bet we could walk out there and, and… pole vault over it?"

Hiei snorted. "We'd have to get a running start of about a hundred miles, you dolt."

"Hey, at least I had a suggestion," Kuwabara snapped.

Hiei bristled and would have snapped right back had Kurama not spoken up. "Perhaps we could swim _under_ the whirlpools," the fox demon said absently, and he went to the water's edge. "The pools narrow as they reach the bottom of the riverbed; in fact, they usually disappear once they reach only halfway down." We all stared at him as he knelt, removed a glove, and dipped two fingers into the reeds. As soon as he lifted those fingers back into the air, the moisture on them froze solid. "Or perhaps not," he said dryly, rubbing his thumb across the ice to break it. "None of us could survive these temperatures."

"I could."

This time it was me everyone stared at: the words had slipped out of my mouth on impulse, and as four pairs of eyes—black, brown, red, and green—bored into mine in shock, I swallowed down my jumping nerves. "Hiei, you remember, right?" I asked, meeting his gaze head on. "My Koi form is resistant to temperatures, and since I can breathe under water I could go check it—"

"Absolutely not," Hiei deadpanned.

"You can turn into a Koi?" Kuwabara said in disbelief, and when everyone nodded his face—what little of it I could see peeking from his hood—went red. "That's it," he said, stomping one foot in childlike petulance, "I am _tired_ of being left out. What else can you do?"

But I had bigger fish to fry than Kuwabara. "But why not?" I pressed, walking so I could see Hiei nose to nose. I was hoping to back him into a figurative corner. "I could do it! And I've been working on my energy shields, so I could put you in one and take you down—"

"It's too dangerous," Hiei hissed, pushing past me.

I turned and followed him as he started walking away down the shoreline. "You guys do dangerous stuff all the time!" I yelled as he walked down the beach. I limped after, leaving the rest of the boys to watch us in silence. "Can't I have any fun?"

Hiei kept walking, and before long it was impossible to keep up. "Wait!" I called after him, stopping in my tracks. "Hey, wait—WAIT! DON'T YOU WALK AWAY FROM ME!"

It seemed, however, that Hiei had no intention of waiting at all. In frustration I bent down and scooped up a pebble, and with a snarl I lobbed it at him. It hit the back of one of his shoulders with a smack.

He stopped dead.

I reached up and ripped my hood off. "Yeah, I'm talking to _you_, buddy!" I bellowed, feet planted firm in the stones. Hiei turned slowly, glaring at me with unconcealed anger as my hair whipped into my face like steel silk. "That's right, turn around and face me! I'm not going anywhere!"

He took one step toward me, and then another, and then another. "Tell me why I shouldn't just knock you unconscious for the rest of this trip," he hissed, eyes all but glowing, and the intensity of his look made me freeze in ways the vicious cold did not. "Doubtless you'd be less annoying that way."

My voice, when I found it again, was hard to project over the wind, and my lips burned even as the saliva on them froze. "I was totally slowing you guys down back there—no point in trying to deny it!" I yelled as Hiei took another step toward me. His expression—one of anger, threats, and impatience—did not waver. "You had to melt the freaking snow so I could even _pretend_ to keep up! I feel like dead weight."

His lips barely moved when he said: "You _are_ dead weight."

I glared at him. He was only a few feet away at that point. "So maybe this will make me more worth your while," I said, and the fire of my anger cooled. "Look," I said as Hiei came to a stop about a foot away. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm a nuisance. But if I could just do _one_ _thing_ to make this mission a little easier, I would do it no matter how dangerous it is." I looked up into his impassive face. "Please. I want to do this. I want to feel useful."

For a long time he just stared at me, eyes unwavering and firm.

"Please," I repeated, and he finally looked out at the swirling pools marring the river's surface.

"Don't die," he said eventually, and he did not look at me when he stepped past and made to rejoin the others.

I turned after him, hopping forward to catch his sleeve in my hand. "Hiei," I said, desperate, and he turned his head just enough for me to see his face in profile. I did not let him go. "Thank you, Hiei," I said.

He smirked. "I'm just wondering why you felt you needed _my_ blessing in this," he said in a languid tone I did not understand, and when my mouth dropped open he turned to me. His glove came off in an instant, and before I could understand what was happening he had pressed his hand over my mouth.

"Hiei," I tried to say, but the sound was muffled.

"Your spit was freezing," he said, and I felt the heat of his skin burn through the crust of ice on my mouth. "Put your hood up."

His hand dropped; our eyes didn't. He was the one who smirked while I stood there, stricken, and he was the first to turn away.

He was also the one who held all the power in that moment. I felt it as intensely as I felt his fire lingering on my lips.

"Come back to the others, Dani," he said, and he walked in the opposite direction.

* * *

Kurama, when I came back, was doing something awfully odd in the lee of the cliff overhead. His pack lay open on the ground and he had a small leather drawstring pouch clutched tightly in one gloved hand. His other hand was bare, and with it he was digging small holes in the packed earth. After he finished digging a hole, he would reach into the bag and pull out a small dark thing, a thing he would press into the earth with a murmur and a glow of silvery green energy concentrated in his fingertips. After digging a dozen or so holes, he stepped back and put his missing glove on.

"I would advise you all to move a little ways off," he said pleasantly, and he moved to stand in—well, that's when I noticed that all the little holes he had made were in the shape of a giant circle. The rest of us hustled off, chafing our arms to keep warm as Kurama lifted his hands and shut his eyes.

A new wind picked up, one that set Kurama's hair to tossing and one that smelled like freshly turned soil and gardenias. His body began to glow with more silvery-green energy, and before long I felt a rumble in the soles of my feet. The ground trembled and quaked, and then the holes all seemed to fill up with Kurama's energy color, and then from the depths of the bowls carved into the earth came flowers.

The vines came out first, twisting and weaving into being with a burst of color and light. Kurama directed them with his hands, pointing them toward each other until all the vines started weaving into a giant net that climbed up and over itself inch by inch by inch. Eventually everything came together to form a small hut, one that had formed around Kurama so that I could no longer see him, and even though that alone was enough to impress me, what happened after was even neater. Mauve buds the size of my fist started swelling all over the place, and with a shiver of light they all burst forth to reveal bright red hearts that gave off a smell not unlike woodsmoke.

But the best part of it all was the heat. I could feel it even as far away as I and the others were, and I could tell without really telling at all that the flowers were the cause of the delicious warmth.

Kurama emerged from the hut a moment later, batting a hanging curtain of vines aside with his arm. "Come in out of the cold," he said, smiling before he disappeared inside, and Yusuke and Kuwabara took one look at each other before pelting headlong toward the hut. They began a push-war when they got to the doorway, but I took advantage of their mutual distraction to slip inside first.

I took off my hood immediately, grinning from ear to ear at Kurama. He sat leaning against the far wall of the circular hut, his coat and fur pants already lying neatly folded at his side. He wore a long-sleeved sweater in black and a pair of jeans underneath, and I sighed as I stripped out of my outer layers to reveal my similar attire hiding out of sight.

"This is awesome," I said as Hiei ducked in the door. Kuwabara came in after, and after him came Yusuke, who was grumbling about cheaters.

"The Makai fire flower," Kurama explained thoughtfully. "I thought the seeds would come in handy. I've been saving them for months."

I moved to sit by the wall a few feet to Kurama's left. Eventually everyone got settled, nestled into the flowering vines with many sighs and compliments aimed Kurama's way. The relaxed atmosphere, however, could only last for so long before business had to kick back in.

"I gave thought to your volunteering, Dani," Kurama said. "Going under the whirlpools seems like a solid idea. You should go into the water to investigate, then tell us if it's worth the construction of an energy shield to take the rest of us across." He smiled. "Though I imagine one of us could construct a better shield than you could, since you'll be distracted with towing us through the water."

I scratched the back of my neck. "That's probably a good thing," I said with a nervous smile, "because I'm still not too good at the whole shield business. Getting there, but…" I shrugged. "I can make gas masks but that's about it."

"So how does this fish business work, anyway?" Kuwabara grumbled. "I know next to squat about it, in case you don't remember."

I decided to tell him the simple version: "I absorb the essence of another creature, fusing their defining attributes with my own body," I explained. "I get gills and scales and fins when I mimic a Koi, but I lose my hearing and speech in the bargain."

"The best and the worst parts, then," Kuwabara said. He gestured at the hut. "Will you do the whole absorb-y thing in here, or…?"

I thought about it. The question had brought to mind a huge host of problems.

"Well," I began slowly, "temperature doesn't bother me as a fish, so I guess I could shift outside, but I can't wear too many clothes when I shift because they'll squash my fins and my fingers are too clumsy to get them off..." My cheeks went red. "Um…"

"You can't change outside if you're naked—you'll die!" Yusuke said. "It's friggin' _cold_!"

"You have to shift in here, then," Kuwabara said firmly, but I had to shake my head.

"I can't walk too well when I'm a fish," I said. The heat in my face spread to the back of my neck. "And I'll suffocate because I can't breathe air with gills. I have to change near the water." I thought about it for a sec. The implications of this were beginning to dawn on me. "Great. This is just great," I said, defeated as I put my head in my hands. "Why couldn't this hut be next to the stupid river?"

"May I be blunt?"

I looked at Kurama, who was looking at me with an apologetic expression.

"I think this situation calls for it," I said stiffly, and he nodded with a small smile.

"Our options," Kurama surmised, "are that you shift by the water, thereby exposing yourself to the cold, or shift in here, thereby exposing yourself to… us."

"Hey, I can hide my eyes!" Kuwabara said, and he gave me a superior look. "_I_ am not a pervert, thank you very much."

I sighed. "Look, I only said _two_ perverted things," I said. "Are you going to hold that over my head for… for _forever_?"

Hiei looked at me sharply. "You said what?" he snapped, and I threaded my fingers into my hair as I pulled my thighs up to my chest.

"This is _not_ the tangent we need to be on right now," I groaned into my knees. "And yeah, Kuwabara, you _wouldn't_ look. But _someone_ would need to because I can't get myself to the waterfront from here in my fish form!"

I heard him say, in a very small voice, the word: "Oh."

"So you let one of us see you in your underpants—big deal," Yusuke said, stretching, and when I looked up to glare I saw that he was grinning. The bottom fell out of my stomach. "Only one question—who's it gonna be?"

My reply was immediate: "Kuwabara!" I said, and he did the single most impressive double take I have ever seen.

"Me?" he squeaked. "ME? WHY ME?"

"Because you," I said coolly, "are not a pervert, and therefore I can trust you." I glanced at Yusuke, who was lying on the floor laughing. "_You_ would make stupid jokes about my cup size."

"No way!" Kuwabara was saying, shaking his head like an annoyed bull. "Nuh-uh! I like Yukina-chan, not you!"

I stared at him, mouth twitching, before sighing in defeat. "Then Kurama," I said, and the redhead raised an eyebrow.

"Why, may I ask?" he asked.

"'Cause you're a gentleman," I said snippishly. "And you look enough like a girl to fool me into believing I'm just back in my highschool locker room."

Kurama glared at me—it was a funny sight to see, one made even funnier by Kuwabara and Yusuke's amused reactions.

"I'll do it," Hiei said.

I turned to look at him, totally aghast and hoping to see his typical teasing smirk, but he looked deadly serious. "Why _you_?" I asked in shock, and his lips pursed.

"Kurama's other side is less of a gentleman than you think it is," he said, words bald, and Kurama winced.

"I am afraid he might be right," said Yoko's host, and I blew air out of my cheeks in a rush.

"So I _don't_ trust Yusuke, I _can't_ trust Kurama, and Kuwabara is too much of a _pansy_ to do it himself," I griped. "Great. Well, Hiei, this is just _great_. Why did you have to go and say that?"

"Is the idea really so disgusting?" he said in a voice of ominous foreboding, and I gave a nervous chuckle.

"Now what makes you say that?" I simpered, and I shook my head from side to side. "Shit! Thinking about this is just gonna make it worse!"

"Then let's get on it," Yusuke said, and he started pulling on his coat. "We'll leave you two alone," he crooned, obviously mocking me, and I growled at him.

"Get out!" I hissed, grabbing my coat so I could chuck it at him, but he dodged like some sort of monkey.

"Oh, eager to get in the thick of it, are you?" he asked, face twisting into a mockery of girlish concern.

"That's what _she_ said!" I snapped, and he started to laugh. Taking advantage of this, I was able to smack him in the face with my snowpants. "Now leave before I go shark-teeth on your ass!"

"Don't get your panties in a knot!" Yusuke howled. "They'll only be harder to take off!"

"Bet that's what you have to tell Keiko every time you try to get into _her_ pants!" I shot back, and you should have _seen_ the looks on everyone's faces.

"Yusuke has really gotten to you, hasn't he, Dani?" Kurama said in obvious melancholy, and I stuck out my tongue.

"More like _I_ got to _him_," I said with mock pride. "Now scram, all of you."

"D-Dani!" Kuwabara stuttered. "You're awful!"

"He started it!" I yelled, pointing at Yusuke. "Blame him, not me!"

Kuwabara shook his head. "I can't believe you," he murmured, and he pushed Yusuke out the door. "That's it: you two aren't allowed to hang out anymore. It's like putting dynamite and lava in a blender full of porn."

"I am inclined to agree," Kurama said dryly, and he followed the Spirit Detectives out.

I huffed in my seat, grumbling at their back. "Yeah, just abandon me!" I snapped at no one, and then Hiei cleared his throat.

I turned to him, momentarily confused as to why he was still there, and then he sighed.

"Well," he said, and paused. His unspoken words said everything he couldn't, but it still took a minute for the obvious to sink in.

Hiei and I… were _alone_.

* * *

_NOTES: _

_HOSHIT—_

_This was super hard to start but super fun to finish. That might also be what she said. YAY!_

_Also, Hiei moments. As in, we had them. What? WHAT?_

_You're all going to KILL ME for what happens in the next chapter._

_I would like to congratulate KNIGHTLYGIRL and DESTINYSWINDOW, because IT REALLY WAS SQUIRRELS!_

_But let's get right to business: Would any of you appreciate a change in "Future Talk"'s updating schedule? I've been getting reviews saying that people are staying up late Monday night to wait for the chapters to get posted, and I don't exactly advocate this considering that my bedtime is at 3 AM and I often post around then if I'm behind schedule. So, some of you get very little sleep on Monday nights, and this distresses me!_

_Upon further reflection, I also realized that many of you are in school or are working and don't have much time during the week to read, anyway, so I am considering updating more around the weekend to accommodate for both these things. What do you guys think of Friday or Saturday nights so you can sleep in the next morning?_

_Well, whatever you think, there's a poll on my profile where you can chip in. I'd appreciate the feedback! (Also, I updated the poll, so it's brand new and much simpler if you already saw the old one. Go take it? Please?)_

_I will leave the poll up until next week, and if a change is voted upon favorably, it will be put in place the week after next. So yes, an update will come next Tuesday. It's the week after that'll be strange._

_We also have ART WORK TO ANNOUNCE! Krrib drew a picture of Dani in her KOI FORM, looking all sweet and awesome and underwater-y! I love the hair and the sheer atmosphere of the picture to DEATH!, so please go check it out. ^^ A link is on my profile!_

_But guess what? There's MORE artwork, but for my other story Fakes & Fiends. Kaijin-san painted a GREAT watercolor of Chiyo, which is BEAUTIFUL and way better than anything I could ever hope to draw, and Misuzu-PM is drawing… A COMIC for Fakes & Fiends! She has two concept sketches posted, which are awesome and wonderful! =D As you can tell, I am ultra-super-awesome excited about all of these things, so please visit my profile or deviantART page for more details!_

_ONE MORE THING: Chapter title named for a rap song I don't really know, but I still think was applicable considering the overabundance of hoods in this chapter._

_THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK YOU CRAZY AWESOME PEOPLE, YOU! Sarah Jackson—The Other, Turtle Kid, Inferno, DoilyRox, MusicFiend666, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Koryu Elric, Misuzu-PM, Foxgirl Ray, knightlygirl, ichixichigo, AkaMizu-chan, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., Kaiya's Watergarden, LadyoftheGags, DragonDancer93, loser94, Wolf-Cry-Night, Reclun, colbub, dude where's my spirit gun, XAudra RoseX, WhiteRoseFox, ShadowFireFox13, American Senpai, 0nfateswings, rain chant, Katt Jeane, [leave a name so I can thank you properly!] and destinyswindow!_


	39. Chapter 39: Stripped

Future Talk

Chapter 39:

"Stripped"

* * *

We stared at one another for a good long while, Hiei and I, but I was the first to look away.

"Turn around," I said, trying not to pout or cry or scream at him. Why the hell was this _happening_ to me, anyway?

He sat with his back to the wall in his usual pose, with one leg stretched out and the other bent at the knee so he could rest his elbow on it. When he heard my request he smirked and dropped his head, but he did not turn away.

"I won't look," he said, eyes closing. His chin practically rested on his chest, but all it would take to see me would be a slight slit between his eyelids, red gazing unnoticed through a fringe of lashes…

"Uh-huh," I said, fingers digging into the ground as I stared at him. I did not move to get undressed. "Turn around."

One crimson eye cracked open. "I said," he growled, "that I wouldn't look."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "Uh-huh," I said stubbornly. "I believe you. Now turn around."

His other eye opened as he inclined his head. "I won't," he said.

Temper flared. "Why the hell not?"

His eyes fell shut again. "Because," he said.

I waited for him to go on, but when he didn't I said: "Because. Just… because." I cocked my head to one side. "What are you, a five year old?"

His eyes flew open. My breathing stopped. "I won't look away because you need to trust me," he snapped, and those arresting eyes closed. I found my breath again.

I also found out that I wanted to play a trick on him. So, I said: "You _promise_ to keep your eyes closed?" in my best lost-little-girl-voice, and Hiei's smirk returned.

"Yes," he said lazily, chin falling back onto his chest, and I stood up.

"All right," I said, keeping the stupid voice in place, and I wrestled my long-sleeved thermal off to reveal the button-up shirt beneath. I balled the thermal up and shook it out with a whiplash sound, unbuttoned my shirt with over-exaggerated twists of the fabric, and unzipped my jeans as loudly and dramatically as I could. I stared at Hiei for a minute more, lips twitching with insulting words I didn't know how to say as I felt my shirt fall open across my chest.

Then I took a deep breath before letting loose a shriek that could wake the dead.

Hiei bolted to his feet, eyes flying wide as his hand went to the sword at his hip. His confused stare narrowed in on the finger I had pointed straight at his face.

"SEE!" I bellowed in triumph. "Your eyes are OPEN!"

Confusion morphed into a glare. "You tricked me!" he roared back, hands balling up into fists at his side.

"Yeah, and your eyes are _so_ open," I gloated. "I win. Now look away."

"I will no—" he began, and then his eyes flicked down the length of my body before narrowing into two red slits. "Well, then," he said slowly. He sounded as lazy as a snake coiled to strike, but with only the slightest hint of hidden fang. The voice made me shiver in ways that were not very pleasant at all. "If you'd _wanted_ me to see you like this, all you had to do was ask."

I gaped at him, unsure of what he meant, and I looked down at myself only to remember that my shirt was hanging totally open ("Why _hello_ there, pink-bra-edged-in-white-lace, how's the weather down there?") and that my dark jeans were undone at the zipper, leaving nearly half of my boy-short panties on display. A horrendously insistent blush surged into my cheeks when I looked up to find him staring at me through half-lidded eyes, a smile lazy enough to match his demeanor playing over his mouth.

"That _wasn't_," I managed thickly, "what I was trying to do."

Hiei's smirk widened. "It wasn't?" he said in a voice that sounded more like a cross between a growl and a purr.

"You're a pervert!" I snapped acidly. My fists balled up at my sides just as his started to uncurl.

His head tilted a few centimeters to the left, eyes travelling over me again. "And yet you're not trying to cover yourself," he said.

My mouth went dry, and then rage made my vision tunnel. "I don't see _you_ looking away to preserve my modesty!" I snapped, not reaching to yank my top closed because I was _not_, damn him, going to be the one to accommodate for my own comfort! _Hiei_ was going to bend first, _Hiei_ was going to close his freaking eyes, _Hiei_ was going to—

Hiei and I both jumped when a gravelly voice said: "Uh, guys?"

"What?" we snapped, heads whipping as one toward the hut's doorway. When we realized we had spoken in unison, we looked at one another and glared. Well, I glared. Hiei just gave me a look that said he knew very well that he was pissing me off, and was that a spark of _enjoyment_ in his eyes or was I hallucinating?

"Um," said Kuwabara, "I heard yelling." The vine-woven flap of a door breezed open, sending a chilly wind knifing through the warm room. Neither Hiei nor I flinched, however, and when Kuwabara stuck his head inside and started looking between the two of us like we were about to launch at each other's throats, he said: "Can you hurry this up? It's really friggin' cold out here!" Then, of course, he noticed my state of undress. His eyes bugged out of his head. "Hiei!" he bellowed, pulling himself back outdoors like a scared turtle retreating into its shell. "You pervert! Close your eyes when a girl's changing!"

"Mind your own business, oaf," Hiei said, one eye on me and another on the door.

"Hey! At least I'm not a pervert!" Kuwabara yelled from outside.

"It's fine, Kuwabara," I replied, my tone turned poisonously sweet. "Hiei's just being stubborn. Aren't you, Hiei?"

His eyebrows rose. "_You're_ the stubborn one," he said.

I stared at him and he stared at me, my lips twitching as I tried not to scream or crack a hysterical smile, possibly at the same time.

"Fine," I finally said in a short, breathy voice of impatience and sugary-sweet annoyance. With a twist I shrugged off my gaping shirt, letting it hang loose from my elbows so my shoulders and torso and sternum and ribs were all more or less exposed. "Fine. Whatever." I ripped off the rest of the shirt and tossed it on the ground as hard as I could. "You wanna play like that? Fine. I can play like that." I yanked my belt out of its loops, dangled it between my thumb and forefinger, and dropped it. "Turn around before I do something we'll _both_ regret."

His lips curled back over his teeth in a not-quite-smile. "I _don't_ regret," he said.

I put my hands to the zipper of my jeans, eyes roving over the inside of the hut in desperation. "Just… just look away, please!" I blurted, hands falling limply to my sides as I stared up at the ceiling. "Seriously, Hiei, I'm embarrassed!"

"Embarrassed?" he repeated. "About what?"

I looked at him sharply. "You're joking, right?" I snapped. I clasped my arms across my bra in an attempt to cover my sudden goose bumps. "I'm standing here in my underwear!"

"So?"

"So it's awkward!" I said, tone heated. "Being naked in front of someone is just—"

Eyes like coals bored into mine, a flash of sharpness silencing my words before they could be born. "It's just your body," he said in a low voice, not one that was teasing or angry or anything like that at all. "There's nothing to be ashamed of."

I'll admit that the skin across my nose and cheeks went red. "I'm embarrassed," I repeated lamely.

"About what?" he asked again. When he took a step forward, I took a step back, arms still clutched tight around myself.

I found myself staring at the boots on my feet, lips pursed and eyes screwed up tight. I wet my lips with my tongue slowly, unsure of what to do, and then Hiei's feet entered my field of vision.

"About," he said, but with more force this time, "what?"

I looked up with a harsh jerk of my head, glaring at him from under strands of my unkempt hair and totally prepared to give him the biggest talking to of the century.

His face, however, stopped me.

I had been expecting his jaw to be set, confrontational and stubborn, and I had expected his eyes to flash and mock and show levels of scorn I could never fathom. But his mouth was drawn up in a firm line of confusion, as if he were trying to understand something but unable to despite all his efforts, and his eyes… I had never seen him look that way before. There was earnestness there, and openness, but it was all tempered with an easy sort of annoyance, a soft and affectionate skepticism, one you'd expect from someone who was only putting up with their confusion because the other person was…

"Well _look_ at me," I blurted.

His eyes dipped from my face to my body and back again. "I am looking," he said.

"I mean, actually _look_," I said, and I briefly let my hands drop before wrapping myself in them again. "I'm just… this is just not _good_." The sudden rush of feminine insecurity left me reeling. It wasn't like me to stress over things like weight and cup size, not like most girls my age because I spent so much effort coming to terms with my identity as a cripple that I just didn't have the energy to grapple with normal girly uncertainties, too. Still, in that moment I felt like I was under a microscope of feminine expectation, and I didn't like it one bit.

"What are you thinking?" Hiei said.

I looked him dead in the face, shaking my hair out of the way with a frustrated sigh. "I'm _bony_," I said through clenched teeth. "I've got these boy's hips and no curves and it sucks, OK? So yeah, I get embarrassed when people see me naked because I look _sick_. Someone accused me of having _bulimia_ once!"

Hiei's face darkened as I spoke, and by the time I finished he looked—well, he looked angry. "I didn't think of you as a shallow person until now," he said harshly. "Who knew you of all people were so hung up on—"

"Me!" I said. "Me! Hung up on appearances? HA!" I tossed my head back, walking around Hiei so I could throw my hands in the air. "I've got a leg that makes kids cry and you think I'm worried about my _face_?"

"Well obviously," he said from behind me. "If you didn't care about what people think, you wouldn't be embarrassed. Idiot."

My next words just popped out, unbidden. "I'm only embarrassed because it's _you_!" I said, wheeling on him, and I froze.

_What did I just say? _

Hiei had gone stock-still, eyes open their widest as he stared at me. With a pang of misplaced wonder I remembered what he was: powerful and strong, a man of himself and worlds I had never seen. And here I was, arguing with him the way I would with someone I…

Something dawned in him. I could see the resolution form behind his beautiful eyes before I even knew what the resolution was.

"You don't care what _people_ think," he surmised, making my blood run hot and cold in turn. "You care what _I_ think." Lips broke over white teeth. "Isn't that interesting."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said, unable to say anything else.

Hiei did something strange, then—he threw back his head and laughed, muscles straining in his neck as the sound burst from his throat. I flinched, drawing back in dread, and then his head fell forward into one of his waiting hands. All I could see was his smile below the fringe of his ink-dark hair, and the watching sliver of an eye peeking out from between his splayed fingers. His eyes stilled me, waters running deep for one uncompromising instant.

"_I_ know," he murmured in a voice of shadowed mirth, and he walked past me without a single glance my way. "So leave everything to me." I heard him yank open the pack he had left propped against the hut's wall, but since it was impossible for me to move I just let him rustle around behind my back until I heard him stand.

I jumped when something soft settled around my shoulders. My hands went up on reflex fingers twisting desperately into the blanket Hiei had smoothed across my back with one languid motion. His hands pressed down onto my shoulders through the cloth, heavy and hot and real.

I swallowed when I felt his chest press lightly against my back. His fingers tightened on my collarbone. With shy horror I realized that my heart was beating loud, so loud, so loud I could feel my pulse twitching in my lips and cheeks and chest—

"Use this," he whispered in the shell of my ear. My spine convulsed, a shiver racing up my vertebrae and down again. He felt it shake me, I knew he did, and when his satisfied chuckle made the hairs rise on the back of my neck I couldn't help but shudder again. "Your body is not perfect," he said, breath misting hot even in the warm room, "not even close."

My shoulders stiffened, breath hitching in my belly like the nerves of a bucking beast.

"But I have _never_," he murmured, fingers dragging across the blanket, "known anything more _boring_ than perfection."

He pushed away, then, rocking me where I stood, and it wasn't until I heard him slide down the viney wall that I had the sense to turn around. His eyes were closed, his breathing even, his posture relaxed—if I didn't know any better, I would have assumed he was sleeping with one knee bent, one leg stretched out, elbow propped up with fingers just slightly curled. I knew without words that he would not open his eyes even if I screamed again.

So I undressed. I stripped off my jeans until I stood in nothing but my bra and panties, and though I planned to keep the bottoms on I was not so sure about the top. But then I remembered the way my bra strap had crushed my dorsal spines and how there was no way my webbed fingers could ever manage to unhook it in the water, and I sighed and reached behind myself to take it off.

But, of course, I glanced at Hiei midway through. I'm ashamed to say I hesitated.

"Do NOT, under _any circumstances_, open your eyes," I said, voice shaking though I didn't know why, and I unhooked the clasp. With a shiver that was not a product of chill, I picked up my blanket and wrapped it around myself the way I would wrap myself in a towel, with fabric bunched underneath my armpits like I was some sort of burrito. I neatly folded my clothes and sat myself down, trying my best to keep the blanket in place, and when all seemed well I said: "OK. I'm good."

His eyes snapped open, all illusions of sleep vanishing. With a single roving look he took in everything I had done, the folded clothes and my covered body and all, and then he was looking at my face.

"Well," I said, shifting in discomfort. My heart finally started to slow down, and I tried to sound as normal as possible as I pushed the memory of Hiei's breath on the nape of my neck away. "I'm gonna paint the fish in my head in theta, and take it in, and—" I paused. "Wait one moment."

I scooted over to my pack, opening it to find a bottle of water with a friendly pink label (obviously a personal touch from Botan, if I had to take a guess) proclaiming it as such. With a sigh I took the bottle out and set it in front of me, twisting the cap so it was loose but still fairly spill-proof.

I looked back up at Hiei, who was watching me with interest I didn't want to unravel.

"I'll probably start freaking out when I can't breathe," I explained, all business as I pointed at the bottle. "Get me to swallow some of _that_ if I turn blue. Fish swallow water to get oxygen."

Hiei said nothing, but he did nod at the very least.

"Good, then," I said in a low voice, taking a slow breath to prepare myself. My eyes closed. "I'm the only person who should wake me up," I said between deep, even breaths. _Be still, my beating heart,_ I thought as I tried to calm my pulse. "Don't talk to me. Just let me… drift." I leaned forward to brace my hands on the ground. Grass that was no longer frozen tickled my palms. Hair brushed my shoulders and neck. "It shouldn't… take… long…"

I floated down a river of my own creation, and when I felt myself settle into theta I pulled up the image of Genkai's Koi, floating streams of gold and black music that waved like fronds in a brook's current. With a breath I drank it in, pulling the essence of that creature into myself, and the Koi's self circled my own self like the light and dark halves of a yin yang until we came together with a click ,locking together in perfect stasis like two pieces of an age old puzzle. The click forced me out of theta, back into the warmth of Kurama's hut, and—

My eyes opened and my ears closed as I took one, then two, then three deep human breaths. Hiei's eyes stayed on mine and mine stayed on his as my breathing grew shallow and I felt scales creep over my skin like twitching chips of metal, and with small motions I let my webbed hand grope along the ground for my water bottle. My lungs closed off before I found it, though, and I looked away from Hiei as my vision blurred. I gasped, lacking oxygen as the change sapped me of my energy and strength, but my fish's eyes weren't good for seeing out of water and I couldn't find the bottle, I couldn't—

I fell over sideways, strength gone. Air filled my stomach and not my lungs as it tore down my esophagus, rattling down my not-breathing throat with a dry vibration. I found myself grabbing at my neck in desperation, longing for water, just a sip, just a sip to ease my dying body—

Something warm and firm and smooth pressed against my lips, the heat making me part my mouth with a gasp, and then something decidedly wet splashed against my tongue. I gulped down the water with a cry, choking with joy as the oxygen-stripped liquid splashed out of my gills and onto my shoulders, and when my eyes opened I found Hiei's face disorientingly close to mine. He pulled back when I surged into a sitting position, but the water wasn't enough and I started gasping again, and I felt his hands clamp around my upper arms. With a jerk he pulled me up to him, and before I could protest or try to get away or squirm, he kissed me.

I forgot to open my mouth until he forced me to do it with his tongue, the hot intrusion making me shudder without control, but in that instant I knew that Hiei wasn't really kissing me at all. Water poured out of his mouth and into mine, water I swallowed without protest, and my eyes flickered from his own—wide open and staring, boring into mine with an expression I couldn't name—to the water bottle sitting next to his knees. The cap lay discarded to the side.

I shoved him away, feeling the warmth of his mouth vanish, and I grabbed the waterbottle and took two massive gulps out of it, keeping the water lodged somewhere in my chest without letting it seep out my gills. I'm not sure what the physics of that little trick were, but it felt the same as keeping air trapped inside my lungs so I didn't dwell on it too much. 'Breath' held, I decided not to bop Hiei one across the face as I looked at him and he looked at me, and then he said something, lips moving as he spoke words I couldn't hear.

I shook my head, 'breath' running out as the water gushed out of my gills. Lifting the bottle to my lips alerted me to the fact that my blanket had slipped, exposing me from my scaly breasts to my scaly hips, and with a blush that didn't penetrate the scales on my cheeks I hiked the covering back up. I swallowed more water, trying to play it cool, and I held it in as I pointed toward my missing ears, and rather than try and communicate further Hiei just stood up. He scooped me into his arms—one under my knees and the other behind my back—without delay, and I twined my own arms around his neck as he took three long steps toward the door.

We had to duck to get out, and when we did I caught a single glance of the other boys' shocked glances before Hiei started running. I closed my eyes, the air making their delicate lenses dry out in an instant. It was weird to run and not hear even the wind strip past, but soon I could feel Hiei's shoes crunch over the pebble beach and I knew we'd gone far enough.

I expected him to stop on the beach and let me wade in one my own, but to my astonishment he actually waded into the water with me in his arms, and when I realized what was going on I started to struggle. _Hiei,_ I thought, _this cold could kill you! _So I pushed away from him until he dropped me, but as the water surged over my dried-out skin I realized just why he had tried to wade.

The water, you see, was only two feet deep near the shoreline, and it was so densely packed with reeds that I could barely wriggle down far enough to get the water to close only an inch or so over my entire body. But wriggle I did until I found myself staring at Hiei's submerged boots, and when I got settled on my back I sent out a single tentative thought.

_Hiei?_

His consciousness barreled into mine. _Did you think you could walk out there yourself?_ came his biting reply. _It gets deeper soon enough so let me carry you._

I took a deep gulp of water, held it in, and sat up, water streaming down my body as I yanked the sodden blanket off and balled it up over my chest. With a glance I realized that the boys were all standing on the beach, staring, and I waved at them with my finger-webs on full display.

Yusuke, grinning, said something that was probably not too nice, and Kuwabara elbowed him in the ribs. Hiei tossed a word back over his shoulder, resulting in an "Ah-ha!" face from the others, and Kuwabara gestured at his ear. I made a "Hey, whatcha gonna do?" shrug and pointed at my missing ear, and then I looked up at Hiei.

_Stand,_ he thought at me, eyes intent. He wasn't wearing a coat and ice had begun to form on the sodden legs of his pants, and when I glanced down I realized that the blanket was little more than a ball of frozen water.

_You'll freeze to death,_ I thought, and I leaned forward with a splash so my face was in the water. I gulped about a liter down before standing, trying not to think about how I was showing off my ass-scales in nothing but my underpants, but rather than move into his arms like Hiei wanted I just turned away.

_I won't_, he replied.

_I will _not_ be responsible for your death, you jerk,_ I thought back, and I took a halting half-step forward. My feet sank into the watery bed of reeds. _Put a coat on and go warm up._ Another step made me sink in to my thighs. _Ooh, it really is deep here._ I fell forward with a silent splash, drinking water down in the process.

_Blanket?_ Hiei thought to me.

Since I was kneeling in it, the water covered me up to my chin. I looked at Hiei over my shoulder and lobbed the ice-blanket at him, then ducked under the water completely. The murky space between the reeds was a cross between khaki brown and army green, cut through with the pale brown stems of water plants that speared the river's surface like millions of needles.

_I'll let you know when I reach the edge of these stupid plants,_ I thought, and I started fighting through them. They wrapped around my limbs like clinging hands.

_Just don't die,_ he thought, and I felt the tickle-itch of his mind disengage from my own.

The water was lukewarm as I swam through it, neither hot nor cold nor thin nor thick. It just felt _right_ when it surged into the pores of my lateral lines and caressed my tired feet and hydrated my unblinking eyes, but I felt disoriented despite the rightness of it all. The plants obscured the vibrations of other life, every ripple of stem and stalk making my sides hum with warnings. A swirl of plant became a rushing enemy; a crack of root became the gnash of teeth. It got deeper as I continued on, making my way easier, but the plants muffled light until I was swimming in what felt like total darkness.

_Can these stupid plants just end, please?_ I thought when it seemed like I'd be battling through the weeds for all eternity, and then I caught sight of a sliver of light ahead of me. New hope made me struggle harder, and before I knew it I had broken past the edge of the reeds—

I pulled back into the reeds like a startled clownfish a second later, disoriented by the sudden drop off. It went from ten-feet-deep-and-reed-filled to a-hundred-feet-deep-and-empty in an instant, the reed patch ending in an underwater cliff I could barely see the bottom of. The emptiness was far more scary than the dark plants, all sensation in my laterals cut off by a vast cushion of open water, and for some reason the thought of being so exposed…

Pulling back into the plants, I took a deep gulp of water and swam upward with a kick and a twist, head breaking the surface with only a few ripples. My eyes were not good out of the water, however, so all I could see on the shoreline were a few black shapes amid the swaying plants. One of them waved, an action I was just barely able to make out, and I waved back before ducking into the water again.

I felt him in my head before he spoke. _What's happening?_ Hiei asked, and I poked my head back out into the emptiness.

_Ever hear the phrase "It's quiet… too quiet"? _I asked, batting plants away with my hands. _Because this is so quiet it's creepy._

_Open up to me,_ Hiei said, and with sigh of hundreds of silky bubbles I let my mind drift open for him.

Seeing through my eyes, I let Hiei take a good long look at the world outside the reeds. Looking straight out didn't reveal much: just slightly opaque gray water and, far off in the distance, a glimmering silver funnel that was most definitely the underwater view of the whirlpool. But the vast swirl was too far away to see the bottom of, and looking down just revealed an abyss that faded from gray to disconcerting black in only a few feet. Up only showed the undulating surface of the waves above.

_Try to cross it, but don't get near the whirlpool,_ Hiei said. _And don't dive down too far. _

_Don't gotta tell me twice,_ I said, and I pushed out of the shallows. It felt like I was floating in zero gravity as I however over the abyss, and then I shivered despite my lack of cold-sensors.

_Hiei?_ I ventured.

_What?_

_Feel this._

Our minds connected and I opened up again, letting him know the sensations my lateral lines were feeding me. Even as far away as I was, I could feel the slow drag of the whirlpool's suctioning force attempting to pull me toward it in a vast, slow spiral, but the real trouble was brewing _below_ me.

_What do you make of that?_ I thought as I felt the thousands of undulating twitches coming out of the abyss. I summoned up a memory of jumping sharks from a Shark Week program I had watched eons ago. _You don't think…_

_Swim out twenty meters, but be ready to turn back at any moment_, Hiei said. I could feel the tension twanging in his thoughts_. Go slow._

With a tremor of nerves I pushed out farther, swimming with long, cautious strokes as I 'watched' the darkness below me twitch and writhe. Hiei, who still saw through my eyes, told me to stop when I got only sixty or so feet out.

_Turn back and try again in a few minutes_, he said.

I shook his thoughts off and kept going. _If they didn't get me now,_ I thought_, they won't get me later._

_Dani,_ he said, threatening and dark, _turn back. Now._

_I gotta see if we can get across!_ I shot back, and with another kick and lunge with my arms I shot forward about twenty feet. I could swim fast in this body even despite my bum leg, which didn't hurt at all when I kicked with it and its tattered webbing.

_They're baiting you. Your safety comes first_, he snapped, and with a frustrated thought I summoned up a song to drown him out. _Dani—!_ I heard him say, before…

_Stop callin', stop callin', I don't wanna talk anymore_, my thoughts sang as I played Lady Gaga's belligerent 'Telephone,' and soon Hiei's enraged thoughts were drowned in my internal music. I gained foot after foot of ground, reaching two hundred yards with ease. I swam on in rhythm with the song, intent mostly on blocking out Hiei, and in doing so I ended up blocking out the world around me.

The _dangerous_ world around me.

I blame what happened next on that music.

Without warning and mid-stroke, a massive displacement of water beneath and in front of me sent me barreling backward and up toward the river's surface. My arms spread on reflex to slow my ascent, fins and webs acting as a sort of backwards parachute. I looked down in shock as my hair streamed toward the black parts below, lateral lines going nuts as water streamed past in a darkening boil. The surge frightened me, of course, but then I saw the _thing_ in the blackness, the hundreds of mouths stuck haphazardly onto a lump of a body alive with crawling barnacles and tentacles all adrip with cups and spines, and it rose up like a horrid blimp from the deep, grinning a thousand grins as its single yellow eye—an eye as wide as I was tall that never blinked, only stared, gleeful and dark and deep—fastened upon me and said _you, little thing, are my prey_. With a rush of bubbles its mouths all roared so loud that I felt my laterals close up in response, trying to block out the disorienting noise, and with the numbness of terror in my limbs I felt my song break apart.

Hiei burst in as the creature—nearly a half mile ahead of me and still so huge it seemed to block out the sky—began to swim. I flipped over myself and shot back toward the safety of the shallows, feeling his urgency in my head as I caught a glimpse of what he had seen from shore: a huge tsunami of water that bathed the rocky shore in foam, a tentacle breaking the surface, and a demonic bellow of hunger that could wake the dead.

_RUN, DANI!_ he screamed, and I felt the monster (so much bigger than I was, so much stronger than I could ever be, gaining so quickly even though I had so much of a head start) swimming faster than a jet.

I was a hundred yards away from safety at that point. It was at a hundred and fifty. But by the time I cleared ten yards, it had cleared twenty.

_I'm not gonna make it!_ my mind screamed in terror, and as if in response I felt Hiei diving into the depths of my own soul, yanking a thread of music out of me without permission. I did not falter in my swimming as he told me to slow the monster down, and in desperation I grasped at Hiei's provided music and _saw_ it, molded it into something useful. Slow, plodding notes of solidity and height I wove into a stony net, and with a metal equivalent of a punch I let the wall-song—for that's what it became—into the path of the demon behind me.

It was right on my tail at that point, and when it hit my wall illusion I felt it slow down, collide with it with a shudder of water and energy and force. But then the wall broke under the sheer weight of the creature's presence, and I felt it rocket forward after me again.

It was its own eagerness that saved me, though. When it came forward it also made the water on my side of the wall rush out of its way, straight ahead and to the sides, and my laterals sensed and processed this before my brain had even begun to think. My limbs spread on reflex, catching the water behind me the way a base jumper's suit catches air to slow a descent, and without really knowing how I was able to trust my fish's sense to aim me at the reeds on the top of the underwater cliff. I shot into their safety net with a tumble and more than a few bumps, but all in all I was not harmed.

The monster, however, was too big to fit in the shallow shelf atop the cliff, so he ended up colliding with it if the resounding thud I felt in my laterals was any indication. He began to thrash his fins and roar, churning up the shallow water into something like one of those wave pools you see at water parks.

But the danger hadn't passed even though I was in the shallows. As I tried to ride the waves down by the roots of the reeds, struggling to get to the shore so I could get on land and away from the monster, a shadow loomed over me and I rolled, not knowing why I needed to get out from under the shadow until a giant tentacle slammed into the water right where I had been a second before, bubbles fountaining as the tendril began to thrash and search for me. It formed a 'u' shaped loop around where I was, blocking all ways out except for the one behind me, which was back toward the monster itself.

I turned in the water, looking back at the edge of the plants for an escape. A circle of gold—a big one—appeared briefly and locked with my eyes before disappearing behind the reeds, and the tentacle started to close in like a noose.

_Hiei_! I called out, and I felt him enter my panicked head_. Hiei! What do I do!_

_Get out of there!_ he called, and I felt the creature start roaring again. _We'll distract it!_

I did not reply, eyes roving everywhere until I focused on the surface. A shadow loomed large in the air, a storm cloud of bloodlust and hunger, but as I stared up at it through terrified eyes I saw a bright blue light careen into the shadow and drive it slightly back.

_The Spirit Gun_, I thought, and when the monster's tentacle rose out of the water to defend the main body, I rocketed forward into progressively shallower water. It got harder and harder to swim as I went along because the water got more choppy as it lessened in depth, and I felt the wild waves breaking over my back and neck right as my hands and knees collided with the river's floor. No longer swimming, I scrambled for the rocky shore as I scattered drops in all directions, and when I finally hit dry land I sat down and pulled my knees to my chest, turning to face the water and the monster that had nearly eaten me for breakfast.

A single quick look showed me what was going on. The creature, unable to traverse the reedy shoreline, stayed right at the underwater cliff's edge, looming at least a hundred feet above the water's surface. It was even more horrible in the air, with its lumpy gray skin set with so many grinding mouths and razor teeth. The huge eye nestled in the mouths was bleeding from the socket when Yusuke—who stood a little ways down the beach—fired off another Spirit Gun blast. Kuwabara stood behind him (I suppose he didn't have any ranged attacks, making fighting the seamonster impossible), and he was the first to realize I had resurfaced. I lay flat on my back with rocks pressing uncomfortably into my skin, and I waved weakly as he ran over, mouth moving even though I couldn't hear the words. He skidded onto his knees, spraying pebbles in all directions as he came to kneel at my side with a look that said he was about to have a major freak-out.

_Finally,_ I thought when I saw his relieved and worried eyes. _Finally. I'm safe._

I didn't get to stay with Kuwabara for long, however, because just then I felt something wind tight around my bad ankle.

Before the creature gave a tremendous yank and pulled me back into the water up to my hips, I caught a single flash of Kuwabara's shocked face and felt his fingers circle around my wrists so hard I could feel my bones start to grind together. I grasped him back on instinct, webs squishing together as I pulled my fingers tight. His heels dug into the rocks as he tried to keep me from getting pulled under, my laterals going nuts as rocks flew everywhere and landed in the water with soft plops, and then I felt the tentacle sprout barbs like some sort of weird plant and grind their needle-sharp lengths into my skin. I may have screamed as it hurt my already fragile foot, and then something warm started spreading from the dozen finger-sized daggers in my flesh—_poison_, was my first though, and then: _POISON_! My leg muscles went fuzzy and as limp as lead, but as I struggled and kicked and tried to help Kuwabara pull me away, I realized that all my efforts of escape were futile.

I was running out of air, torso lying high and dry on the beach.

Instinct took over, and I dove deep into theta. With desperation I didn't know I could feel I pulled up the image of myself Hiei had given me the first time I tried to change out of my Koi form. A burst of my mental strength shoved the image at my consciousness, and the two things danced until they clicked in place with a loud snap.

My lungs grabbed at the air instantly, but it was the shock of the cold water that made me open my mouth and scream louder than I have ever screamed in my life. I could hear Kuwabara yelling under the sound of my own voice— "Guys HELP ME, it's GOT HER!"—and then there was the sound of the creature's roars, a million breaking skyscrapers raining glass onto dying people, and there was splashing, and then I heard the hollow rush of wind biting into my skin even as water drops froze on my neck and chest in tiny beads of molten ice. I don't know how I got the breath to scream like that, but I don't think I could have reacted any other way. It was just so _cold_, so cold I wanted to die right there to get away from the—

A shadow passed over my face as my screams quieted into shivers that were more like seizures, ones that made my body buck like a wild horse or a whipping string between the holds of my captors, and then I heard a splash, the ring of metal coming out of a scabbard, and footsteps pounding over pebbles. A horrible squelching noise came next, and then the tension pulling my body taut snapped away with a shriek, sending me careening backward up the beach as the creature's tentacle was severed just below where it curled around my leg. I collided with Kuwabara, my back against his chest as I started shaking like a leaf in a gale again.

From the waist down, I felt the water on my skin freeze solid with a snap.

I only had strength to moan despite the icy burn, voice rattling dryly in my throat as I felt my leg—still wrapped in a twitching length of bladed tentacle—light up as if dunked in lava or liquid steel from the knee down, and I heard Kuwabara start shouting for Kurama, for a blanket, for a fire, for _something _as his arms closed around me and started chafing in a fruitless attempt to bring warmth back into my chilled body—

My mind slipped into an odd place, then. I could see out of my drooping eyes, crystals of ice frozen on my lashes and tear ducts making it impossible to even blink, but I couldn't hear much beyond muffled shouts as my body rerouted all of my blood to my brain and heart, trying to keep those essential organs from shutting down in the extreme cold. A new shadow came over me as time slowed to a crawl, and with another groan of absolute despair I felt that shadow draw close in a rush of heat that, for an instant, was too hot for me to abide. But then hands of that same heat closed over my arms and yanked my rigid body upright, Kuwabara's arms falling away as the shadow spoke ("Give her to me!" my shadow snarled) and I found myself pressed against something hot enough to melt the ice on my legs in an instant, and then arms closed around me and I was _flying_.

I saw Yusuke and Kurama running alongside us, and then there was darkness and warm air and I was lying on something soft, a pallet someone had made while I was underwater, and Hiei and the fire of his touch moved away. I reached for him with a cry as I started to shake again, but I felt two hands hold down my arms and another two hold down my legs at the knee, and Kurama was kneeling between my ankles with a knife.

He said something before he started cutting the tentacle away, and I screamed again when he began to peel the barbs out of my flesh one by one by one. Spurts of red blood and green slime made my stomach churn and my muscles cramp, and before I knew what was happening I turned my head away and vomited.

"Oh man," Kuwabara said as he held my thrashing arms above my head. "Oh man, oh man."

"Her face is blue," Yusuke said in a voice that reminded me of a veteran EMT stunned by a particularly gruesome wound, and Kurama and I made eye contact. Red hair framed desperate green eyes as he cut a strip of his coat away and tied off my leg with the makeshift tourniquet.

"Please," I somehow got out, and the word cost me so much strength that my straining neck went limp. My head lolled to one side, and I saw Hiei. Though I had no idea why and I lacked the presence of mind to even wonder, I saw that he had stripped down to practically nothing. Muscles stood rigidly in the gloom.

"Get out," he said to the others, eyes burning into mine as I mouthed 'please' again.

"Can you help her?" I heard Kurama ask, and Hiei turned from me to glare more fiercely than I had ever seen before.

"Get," he bellowed, "OUT!"

Kuwabara's hands let go of my wrists, and with a cry I yanked my legs away from Yusuke and rolled onto my side, hugging into myself as I felt darkness and death's chill slipping in. I did not hear the others leave, but I did feel the hand catch my shoulder and shove me onto my back. It was Hiei, holding a blanket, and he covered me with it before I felt him slip into my makeshift bed. His skin burned into mine as his arms went tight around me, the flesh of his legs making the pain in my ankle flee away as he pressed the two of us together, and my chest flattened tight up against his own as he crushed me into his body. My arms wrapped around him in response, seeking his heat in an attempt to save myself. I pressed my face into his neck as his hands roved over my back, chafing and pulling at my skin to get blood flowing, and each pinch was the purest pain, the kind of pain that made me cry out in joy tempered by hope and hurt and helplessness.

Instinct made me cling to Hiei like a drowning person clings to a raft, but was gratitude that melted the ice crusting over my eyes with hot tears, and it was Hiei who banished the blue from my lips with a touch of what might have been his own.

I fell asleep soon after, his voice growling low and soft in my dreams.

* * *

NOTES:

_Graph looks around from the depths of her raincoat's hood, holding an umbrella at the ready in case of flying produce. She walks to center stage, wary of every single glance she gets from the silent audience._

"_Please don't kill me for this," she says sheepishly, and the umbrella opens with a 'pop'. "Will it save me if I say my evil twin was responsible for it all? Her name is Gertrude, and—"_

_Graphospasm is promptly buried under a mountain of rotten pumpkins, moldy tomatoes, and slimy cucumbers, never to be seen or heard from again._

Except, maybe, for right now. Wings of Silver Rain drew a picture of Dani, shapeshifted into a bird form! It's awesome so go gloat over it, please! =D

_Also… I feel like the end thing with Hiei warming her up just makes sense. Twisted sense. Cause Hiei's a fire demon and she's covered in ice. Hoooo boy. But this doesn't mean they're together or anything. Just… just wait, please please wait, before judging that I shattered all the slow buildup with this…_

… _because there's still the morning after. OHMIGAWD WHAT THE SHIT IS UP WITH MY STUPID BRAIN I DON'T EVEN- (*dies*)_

_THANKS, REVIEWERS! Out-Of-Control-Authoress, j.d.y., Wings of Silver Rain, White Rose Fox, Doily Rox, Otaku Wench, Sarah Jackson-The Other, destinyswindow, Koryu Elric, Afiercebeauty, Masuyo Shun, Wolf-Cry-Night, colbub, Kai-Chan94, ichixichigo, dumbrat, Reclun, ilovemusicrox12, Foxgirl Ray, dude where's my spirit gun, rain chant, Kaiya's Watergarden, double a battery, chocolateluvr13, LadyoftheGags, Turtle Kid, LupinePhyra909, XAudra RoseX, Mindchild, DarlingSM, rya-fire1, hieisdarkdragonchick, 0nfateswings, KattJeane, ShadowFireFox13, and WingThief! _


	40. Chapter 40: Swimming In the Flood

Sorry this is late! (*Graph prostrates herself on the floor, begging for mercy*) I was out of town all weekend and had a bunch of error messages from the site when I tried posting. Ugh! Forgive my lateness!

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 40:

"Swimming In the Flood"

* * *

The sight of his face, for some inexplicable reason, irked me as much as it made me want to break down into a pile of feminine emotion. "I thought you said that _last_ time was goodbye," I muttered, staring at him as I resisted the urge to kiss him, slug him, cry, and scream at him all at once. "What's this all about?"

An eyebrow rose. "Are you not happy to see me?"

"Sure I'm happy. And relieved. And I'm also pissed. Here I was, all ready to let you go and thinking you were lost and gone forever, and now you show up again." I shrugged. "Just seems a little unfair to have to say goodbye a second time." A beat. "A third time. I guess that first time in the hospital counts."

Koenma sighed, looking down at his shoes. "A part of me is wondering why you don't seem at all surprised by this," he said dryly, and the thought gave me pause.

"Well," I said, "maybe I was expecting it. The last 'goodbye' didn't feel real." I shrugged again. "Whatever. You're here now and so am I. How are you contacting me again?"

He gestured at the world around us; white, featureless, and empty. "You're close to death," he said. "If I use less energy to see you when you sleep, imagine how little I have to use when you're dead."

My heart double-timed despite my ghost-like status. "I'm dead?"

"No," he admitted. "But you're close. Your body has gone into a sleep that's almost as deep as a coma to restore itself."

"Will I wake up?"

"Yes."

I rolled my eyes. "Gee, thanks for freaking the hell out of me. There's this thing called, 'tact,' remember?"

My words set Koenma to frowning. He took two steps forward (heels clicking on ground that was not there, which was weird I guess) until my eyes were on level with his collarbone. I backed up a pace on reflex, stumbling when I limped and realized I did not have a cane. But my foot—undamaged since I was little more than a spirit—caught me, and somehow I didn't fall over.

Still, Koenma reached out and grabbed my arm just below the wrist as if to steady me. "Dani," he said, voice stern, "I need to talk to you."

I shrugged him off, standing my ground with hands on my hips. "We _are_ talking," I said sweetly.

He swallowed. "So we are." Brown eyes roved over the nothingness at my back. "And now I don't know where to start."

"The beginning is usually a good place," I said, and his gaze turned sharp.

"That!" he said, pointing a finger at my chest. "_That_ is where I'm going to start. Why are you so snappish?"

"Snappish?" I said, flabbergasted. "Snappish? What the heck is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"You're sarcastic and short with people," he said, staring straight into my face. "I mean, you've always been sarcastic, but lately it's been mean."

"Well, with _you_ maybe it is," I said. "But were you expecting when you say you're leaving me forever and then show up out of nothing, a parade?"

"It's not just with me," he said. "You've been making comments that are not in your character, and you—"

I threw up my hands, eyes squeezing shut. "Can you not imagine the amount of _stress_ I'm under?" I hissed, turning my back on Koenma so I could wave my arms around without hitting him in the face. "I nearly got eaten by a giant fish for dinner and you think I'm being a too _snappish_?"

"I meant _before_ the fish incident!" he said, grabbing me by the shoulder so he could spin me around. I really would have stumbled that time had he not had me in a death-grip. "You and Yusuke have been running around like hooligans, doing your damndest to make others uncomfortable ever since you taught him that stupid 'she said that' joke, and you haven't spoken to Botan without trying to embarrass her in _days_."

My cheeks colored, those stupid red-wearing traitors. "Yusuke and I are bonding," I said in a low voice, but I couldn't look at Koenma when I said it. I hadn't really had a good conversation with Botan in a while, had I? What was worse was that I hadn't even noticed until Koenma said it.

_She hasn't been able to talk to me without calling me a pervert since Yusuke and I joked around that first time_, I thought, and my blush deepened. _Ugh. My mother would be ashamed._

"Bonding at the cost of your own dignity, maybe," said Koenma, and I glared at him. His eyes, however, were soft with pain. "You were different at the beginning, Dani. You smiled more."

"That was before I got my nose broken and my cane got snapped over somebody's knee," I said sullenly. "And it was before a stupid mask-wearing Freakazoid decided I was enemy number one and tried dragging me through a windshield at seventy miles an hour."

"True, but you've never acted this way in the face of adversity before, Dani," Koenma said softly, and I found myself staring down at my toes. Hair fell around my face like a curtain. "It's like a part of you has given up."

"Maybe a part of me has," I mumbled. "This whole thing is just… difficult."

"And I picked you because I knew you could handle this," he said, and his hands rested on my shoulders. "I didn't think it would be easy, and I never said otherwise. But you keep throwing up walls, letting loose a more caustic side of yourself, and… frankly, I'm disappointed in you."

I flinched. Those words were worse than any reprimand or scream. Had my parents been the one to say them, I would have started crying, and when Koenma said it…

I was beyond tears.

"Your success hinges on the relationships you forge in this reality," he went on, not noticing or at least not acknowledging how his words got to me. "You need all the help you can get, and if you're to figure out who summons the Beasts out of the Book, you'll need to know all of these people inside and out. Driving them away because you're feeling stressed won't win you any favors."

"I know that," I managed.

"No, you don't," said Koenma, harsh but not acidic. "If you _knew_, you wouldn't intentionally drive Kuwabara off with all those comments of yours."

I looked up at him, at a loss for words.

"He, more than the others," Koenma said, soft at last, "has the ability to empathize on deep levels. It is possibly his most valuable asset. I'm assuming it's why you drove him off in the first place."

"I don't know what you mean," I said numbly, knowing full well that I really did in a part of me I had never looked at too closely, but Koenma shook his head.

"Yes you do, Dani," he said, and he smoothed a lock of hair behind my ear with gentle fingers. I wanted to lean into his hand, but I didn't. "You feel vulnerable and lost, and you think that if you get close to Kuwabara he'll realize it, too. You don't want to be faced with the weaknesses he'll discover, ones that you refuse to look at yourself, and—" His soft expression went tense. "Dani?"

I didn't realize that there were tears on my face until I touched them with my fingers. "Oh," I said, looking at my wet nails and prints. "Oh."

"I'm sorry; I hit a nerve," Koenma said, and his hands tightened on my shoulders.

"No," I said. My voice was steady despite the tears. "No, it's fine. You're right. The weaker I get the more I withdraw." I tried smiling. "Lauren, my best friend back home, always told me that she knew something was wrong whenever I said that nothing was."

Hair in his eyes, he smiled. There was understanding in his face, tempered with a slight impatience, an itch behind his skin. I smiled back, but in the end the expression cracked and I leaned my face against his chest. Koenma's arms went around me, holding on tight.

"I just worry," he said. "I know it must be hard to stay focused, but still, I worry I've given you too much to handle."

"Too late now," I said, putting my arms around his waist so I could hug him tight. In that world of white, he was the only oasis of reality. "But you never did tell me how you contacted me again."

He shifted, chin pillowing on top of my head. "The Beasts are looking for me, as you know," he said quietly. Weary hands stroked my back. "When I told you I would be unable to contact you again, it was because I was changing my location. I didn't know if they'd catch me, but I didn't want to give you false hope in case they…"

I shivered. "I remember the dream," I said, "where Botan's skin was…"

"Don't," he said sharply.

His words made me frown, and then a dreadful realization dawned somewhere in my chest. "Were you in love with her?" I asked, uncertain words slipping out even as I realized the answer was probably 'yes.'

He froze around me, locking up as if I'd injected his joints with cement.

"You were, weren't you?" I asked, pushing away so I could stare into his face. His arms remained out, as if to embrace me again.

"No," he breathed. The lines around his eyes deepened. "No, not her."

"But someone else," I said, and my chest seemed to constrict. "Someone…"

His arms dropped to his sides. "Ayame," he said, and he pushed a hand through his hair. "I had barely begun to know her when she…"

"When she died," I said slowly. I turned away, remembering the brief manga chapter of their connection being forged for the first—and not the last, I guessed—time. "I see."

"Dani," Koenma said in a wheedling voice. "I don't… pine for her. I know she's dead, and I know she's not... I felt alone until you—"

"Stop," I said, internal pain making my fists clench. I took a deep breath, one that shook and one that made my chest hurt all the more. "I don't want to hear it."

"But Dani—"

"No, Koenma," I said. I turned back to see his earnest face, his agonized eyes, his tight shoulders. "I like you a lot."

His mouth opened, then shut.

"You knew that already," I said, keeping my eyes on his. "And I think you like me, too. Not because we're a perfect match or soul mates, though. It's because we're all each other has. I can't trust anyone I see but you, and you can't see anyone but me."

"It's more than that—" he started to say, but I shook my head.

"You gave me life again," I said. "You gave me a second chance and a mission, and I took it because I felt indebted to you and because you said my own world would die if I didn't do it." I laughed a little. "But more than that, I wanted to save _you_. You, who I knew from Yu Yu Hakusho." Another laugh. "I liked you from the moment we met."

"Dani," he said, and I shook my head another time.

"But then I was thrust into a place where no one liked me at all, and as you came to me in my sleep and gave me support, I realized you were the _only_ one I could lean on," I said. "You were the pillar of my world."

"And you were the only hope of mine," he said earnestly.

"It isn't any wonder, then, that I… fell for you," I said, looking down at my feet again. "Being totally dependent on a person'll do that to you."

"I… agree."

Our eyes met, brown on brown with shared sorrow radiating between.

"Is there any way to get you into my reality?" I asked.

It took him awhile, but he somehow shook his head.

I breathed deep, eyes falling shut. "In that case," I said, "send me back into my body before I start crying again. Because seeing you is too much for me to bear right now."

"As you wish," he whispered.

"But try to see me again," I added, throat clenching, "because I miss you."

"As you wish," he repeated, and blackness took the place of white.

* * *

I couldn't see anything, at first. The air was warm and dark, misting in my face like cotton made into vapor, and when my eyes cracked open with a nearly audible creak I did my best not to moan. There was a pounding heat in my temples, one that only worsened when I took in the dim and leafy roof above me. Breath rattled through my throat, stinging it, and I coughed before trying to roll onto my side.

That was when I realized that my foot—my bad one, the one that suddenly felt like it was burning in a dozen shooting stabs—was clutched in someone's fingers at the ankle.

"Stay on your back," said Hiei's voice, and I stopped moving. I threw my arm over my face and tried to speak, to ask him how long I'd been asleep, but all that came out was a croak.

"Don't try to talk," he said. His fingers felt warm on my leg's chilled skin, stroking it in small circles.

It took most of my strength to raise my head, and when I did I saw Hiei kneeling at the edge of the pallet I lay on. My bad foot my face were the only things visible outside the blankets, but Hiei was staring at the knife in his other hand instead of me.

My eyes would have widened had they not stung as much as they did, and with a gasp I let my head fall back onto the bed. When my head rolled bonelessly to the side, I saw that all the grass—which Kurama's warm hut had thawed—was charred and burned into crisp black dust. There was also a wall next to us, one made out of fireflower vines.

"Is she awake?" I heard Kurama say as I closed my eyes.

"She was," Hiei said. "I'm not sure now."

"Dani?" said Kurama. I heard vines rustle, and when I let my eyes crack open I saw that a viney curtain behind Hiei had been pushed aside. Kurama stood there, looking grim, and I closed my eyes again. "Damn. That poison has to come out. I didn't want her to be awake for that."

"So knock her out again," Hiei said, and his fingers shifted on my ankle.

I moaned lowly, unable to do much else. I wasn't cold anymore, that much was for certain, but my body was slicked with sweat every move I made was punctuated by a fevered tremble.

"Dani?" Kurama asked, and I heard him crunch over the burnt grass to kneel at my side. His fingers ran across my damp forehead. "Fever," he muttered, and then he said to Hiei: "I don't know what a sedative would do to her when she's this weak. We have to keep her conscious." To me, he said: "Dani, this is going to hurt. Try not to struggle. It will be over soon." Fingers clamped onto either side of my jaw. "I'm not gagging you," he said in a soothing voice, and when my mouth opened he slipped something that tasted like leather and felt like rolled up rubber between my teeth. "I just don't want you hurting yourself." His hands encircled my wrists, pinning them together above my left shoulder.

"Do it, Hiei," he said.

If I had thought that the low, throbbing, and warm pain in my leg was bad before then, I will say that it felt like a happy spring day after Hiei's knife descended into my flesh. I screamed (or tried to, because my throat was raw and hardly a whisper came out), and my back arched as my eyes flew open. I tried to yank my foot away, but suddenly it was jerked upward and I could see through pain-streaming eyes that Hiei had lifted it to his mouth.

The sight of my foot made me want to scream again. Dozens of olive-sized sores—neon green, and as round as the marbles I collected as a kid—dotted my bad leg in the places the river-monster's spines had gouged into my flesh, and one of them had been cut across the bulging green sac in order to release the fluid pent up inside. It oozed from the nodule, sullen and glowing with a dull light, until Hiei fastened his lips around it and sucked, hard. The action sent another burst of pain rocketing up my leg, and with a twist I tried to jerk my ankle out of Hiei's mouth. He held on tight, however, barely rocking in his place at all, and as he drew out the venom I felt tears leaking from the corners of my eyes. My teeth ground into the leather gag so hard it was a wonder it didn't puncture.

Two draws later, Hiei tugged his mouth away from my skin with a pop. He leaned over with a grimace and spat into a bowl I hadn't noticed, and when he sat back up his eyes met mine. They seemed to shimmer in the strange half-light of the hut, red and brilliant in the light of my poisoned leg.

"One down," he said.

I passed out when his knife bit into me for the second time.

* * *

The next time I woke, my foot ached. That was all. There were no violent stabs of agony, no sensations of fluid being drained—just a faint sting in the places Hiei had sucked dry and a dull ache in my bones. I was sitting up and leaning forward, chin resting on a curved surface that twitched and moved occasionally. Something cool, wet, and rough went over my bare back in small circles, and I sighed when I realized just how nice the sensation felt on my skin…

"You smelled," said a harsh voice, and with care a pair of hands lowered me onto my back. Strong fingers lifted one of my arms and dragged the wet rag down the inside of my wrist, skimming toward the inside of my elbow as drips scored my chest and throat. "And Kurama said it would calm the fever."

My eyes opened. Hiei knelt over me, face impassive, and I closed my eyes again.

"Can you talk?"

I tried, but the words caught somewhere behind my tongue as my throat lit up with fireworks of pain. I grimaced and shook my head, but the motion sent my world to reeling. It felt like pockets of pressurized water had lodged behind my eyes.

"I didn't think so," Hiei said, and with a flutter I felt a blanket settle over my…

I wasn't wearing a shirt.

_You couldn't have dressed me?_ I thought, sending the slow, quiet thought trembling out into the open for Hiei to grab.

Grab it he did. "No. Your sweating would ruin it," he answered, and I tried to swallow before realizing how painful the action was.

_Oh_. I thought about nothing for a few seconds, managing my voicelessness. Since I had no idea how to handle being pretty much naked in front of Hiei for what was probably the thousandth time in, like, twenty four hours, I settled on being blunt. _Are you the only one who… saw me?_

"No," he said. I heard something slop wetly into something else—the cloth into a bowl of water, perhaps? "We all had to help when you first got out of the water."

I tried not to feel too uncomfortable, angry, and vengeful at that. I mean, I didn't really mind Kurama seeing me—after all, he had seen me naked in the forest the first time we'd met, and as long as he didn't make any comments I wouldn't have to kill him. Yusuke, though, would totally make a disparaging remark, and Kuwabara would act awkward… though I bet he'd be better than Yusuke. He was my first choice to carry me to the river, after all.

"If you're worried," Hiei said in a low voice, "don't be."

Despite how Hiei hadn't offered me any reassurances, just a stark order of 'don't worry' when all I wanted to do _was_ worry, I felt my embarrassment subside. I don't know why.

"Kurama has been caring for you," he went on. "I've kept you warm." I started to send him a thought, but he snapped: "And don't go thanking me for it, either."

My response was automatic and petulant: _Why not?_

"Because I was the only logical choice," he said.

I remembered the way the grass had looked singed around my bed. Hiei, presumably, caught the image, because he said: "You required more heat than the others could provide."

A rather disturbing scenario—one that involved me being roasted on a spit over a fire, apple shoved in my mouth a la luau-pig style—popped up, but rather than dwell on it or any of the other awkward warming-up alternatives (eek, right?), I asked another question. My mind, however, felt fuzzy around the edges, and so the words were labored.

_How long have I been… out?_

"You slept for two hours before it became necessary to remove the venom," he said. I heard him shift so he could sit beside me. "You slept for five hours, after. You'll likely go back to sleep soon."

_What have you all been doing_? I asked, feeling sleepy and soothed after a sponge bath (suffice to say, my loopy, fever-induced-and-passive attitude rendered my embarrassment less potent), and I heard something get rung out. I opened my eyes just in time to have water fall into them when Hiei laid the wet rag across my forehead.

"Sleep now," he said as I blinked the liquid away. "I'll tell you when your fever breaks."

* * *

The fever broke some time later, and when I swam into wakefulness, I was alone. A faint buzzing pound in my temples told me I wasn't entirely well yet, but you know that feeling of utter relief when you literally feel your body _stop_ being a furnace in order to drive out the bad stuff? Yeah, I felt that as well I could feel a rubber band popping against my wrist.

Taking a deep breath through a throat that didn't feel nearly as nice as the rest of me, I sat up to find myself alone in a small closet of a vine-wrought room, with blankets on top of my prone body and fire-blackened grass under my pallet. A cane—the white one with the hidden blade—leaned against the wall, and to the left of it sat the familiar lines of my backpack.

With unsteady hands I wrenched the pack open, finding all my clothes folded neatly inside. I dressed myself slowly—sudden movements still made my head spin and my stomach trip like it was about to expel whatever was still in it onto the floor—and with hesitance I tried to stand. However, I found that my legs were too weak. Any weight on my normally sensitive left leg (one that was now hypersensitive, much to my displeasure) shot spikes of white-hot pain into my calf and thigh, so with shaking limbs and infirm joints I crawled on my hands and knees toward the thinnest section of my room, pushing aside the vine curtain with fingers that felt wooden.

I found myself staring at Kurama's shoes.

"I thought I heard you moving in there," he said, smiling as he sat down. He sat so close that I was effectively barred from leaving my little closet—it became apparent, then, that Kurama had grown a smaller room within the larger hut, affording me privacy thanks to the new partition.

I shrugged, opened my mouth, and managed to croak in a voice even a frog wouldn't want: "How long have—"

He shushed me. "I would not recommend talking just yet," he said, apology written all over his face. "You screamed so loudly on the beach that I fear you've damaged your vocal chords."

My pulse fluttered, eyes opening wide with a pang of fear. _But I'm a singer,_ I wanted to tell him, but all I could do was put a hand over my throat and gape.

"Rest is the best cure at this point," he said, patting my knee. He wore no gloves, or anything meant for cold weather, really. Just pants and a long-sleeved shirt. Seeing my questioning look, he said: "The others are out scouting ways to cross the river."

I winced, wanting to say I was sorry for failing my mission as a fish, but Kurama shook his head.

"Don't apologize. That monster was likely not the only adversary we would face taking that route, and none of us can fight effectively under water. We'd be exposed to who knows what." He studied me, and all I could do was fidget. "But to answer the question I think you were going to ask: three hours. In total, you've slept about ten hours. We have not lost much time."

I nodded, giving Kurama another intense, questioning look. _What next?_ I wanted to know, and he picked up on that.

Kurama spread his hands in a placating gesture. "Now we wait," he said. "One of the others will find a way to cross, I'm sure of it."

I gave him a half-smile, nodding again, and he reached out to pat me on the shoulder.

"You're still not totally well," he said. "The demon's venom was meant to slow you down with pain and limited paralysis, and sleeping will help you metabolize and get rid of the remaining toxins. Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Hiei won't be back for a few hours more, so why don't you try to rest until then? I'll wake you when they arrive."

Half of me wanted to tell him that I was sick and tired of sleeping, thanks so much, but the other half of me was fully conscious of how stiffly my joints moved and how much tension wound my muscles taut. I sighed before smiling, nodding, and mouthing a "thank you" at him—

—unlike Hiei, Kurama actually replied with a genuine "you're welcome."

* * *

But I couldn't sleep after that, not when I remembered the dream of Koenma and how I had told him to visit me again. What if we saw each other; what if it hurt; what if seeing him shot me through with despair or sadness so crippling I just wanted to lie there and cry? Not that I did cry while Kurama sat outside my little room, thinking I was napping since I lay still on my bed with open eyes, staring at the ceiling above as thoughts swam through my head like schools of fish.

When I heard the first of the others come into the hut, cursing in a muffled voice through a hood and scarf of fur, I sat up and crawled to the door just as Kurama pulled the curtain aside. We smiled, not sure what else to do, and he helped me to my feet as I got my cane under me for the first time in a long time. Gingerly, at least a hundred times more gingerly than usual, I limped to the nearest wall (which happened to be the outside of my room thing) and sat down, close enough to lean against it and pant a little as I stretched my suddenly on-fire foot ahead of me.

The person who had come in stripped off their outer layers with more than a few choice words to say about the process, and when the jacket came off over a pair of broad shoulders I saw the face of Kuwabara, red nose and grimacing lips and all. He collapsed against the wall opposite me a second later, using his clothes as a sort of bedding to pad the grassy ground. When he saw me he smiled, waved, and said: "Finally awake, then?"

I nodded as Kurama sat down a bit to Kuwabara's right and said: "She can't talk yet, I'm afraid."

"Not surprised," Kuwabara grunted as he pulled off his boots, and he shot me a grin. "You were screaming like a banshee!"

I shrugged, putting the butt of my cane on the ground between my legs so I could lean my cheek on its smooth barrel. With my free hand I mimed clawing at the air, face contorted into a screeching mask. Kuwabara laughed at me, eyes rolling.

"Do you know where the others are?" Kurama asked, and Kuwabara sighed before sprawling out on the ground.

"Yusuke went north; I went south. Dunno where the shrimp went," he said. "But I didn't find much. The river flows into a big body of water that looks a bit like a lake or an ocean or something; definitely not crossable."

Kurama frowned. "I was afraid of this." He looked to me. "As it stands, Dani, we have no way to move forward. A part of me wants to send you back for more thorough medical treatment, but—"

I shook my head, vehement in my desire to get across that no, I would _not_ allow myself to get sent home. I had a job to do, dammit—maybe I'd forgotten about it, lost sight of it for a time, but Koenma had told me loud and clear that time was running out for him and I was _not_ going to suffer any delays on account of my stupid mistake.

"But you won't go," Kurama finished lamely. "I suspected that." He paused. "How strong are you?"

I looked away, down at the small hands clutched around my cane.

"Try walking," he commanded, and with a pleading look I tried to get him to back down. But Kurama wouldn't, and his eyes remained hard. "Do it, Dani."

I glanced at Kuwabara, hoping for pity. He wouldn't give it. "It wouldn't make sense to keep you here if you can't even walk," he said, and I huffed at them both before grabbing the wall and hauling myself up. With hesitance I tried walking forward, but any weight on my cripple (not to mention poisoned) leg made my knees buckle.

"As I thought," Kurama said in a doomsday voice, and I shook my head as I knelt in the middle of the hut. I held up one finger, hoping for a minute to prove myself, and with a shuddering breath I submerged myself in theta. It only took a few seconds to sing my arm into lengthening, and when my eyes next opened Kuwabara was giving me a look of horror mixed with excitement.

"What the hell is that?" he asked, pointing, and I glanced down at my arm with a smile before using it to walk forward. The grass felt stiff beneath my palm, but it didn't hurt or anything and with it to help me, my bad leg didn't even have to touch the ground. It was like a pair of built-in crutches.

"Circle the room," Kurama said, and I did so. Kuwabara followed me through eyes that didn't know whether to be grossed out or intrigued, and I waggled my over-long fingers at him once Kurama let me sit down.

"And can you use any of your other abilities?" Kurama asked, and I hesitated before giving him an uncertain look. "Oh, I don't mean merging with a Koi," he amended. "I mean, with your music and illusions."

I hesitated again, and before I could answer the hut's door blew open.

_Hiei,_ I said in my head as the fire demon walked across the hut, choosing to stand a few meters to my left. His gaze went to me as he started unfastening his coat. My heart jumped a bit as I floundered in his sight, but with a mental snap I pulled myself together. _Can you tell Kurama something for me?_

The fire demon relayed my message without comment. "She says she doesn't know if she can do anything without her voice," he said tonelessly. "The illusion-songs she makes inside herself, but pulling the music into the real world usually requires some… humming?"

At his uncertainty, I nodded.

He kept one eye on me as he continued: "And to pull pure music into the real world, she needs her voice or an instrument to act as the pillar, or a guide." He finished taking off his outer layers and settled onto the floor to remove his shoes. I kept feeding him lines to speak. "She says she hasn't been able to perfect…" His gaze snapped up to me with a flash. "I am _not_ saying that out loud," he growled.

_Please?_ I asked, giving him my most pitiful expression.

"Saying what?" Kuwabara asked, brow knit.

To my surprise, the puppy-eyes worked. "She says she hasn't been able to perfect becoming a 'human jukebox' yet," Hiei said dryly, and with a glare he settled back against the hut's wall, folded his arms and crossed his legs at the ankle, and closed his eyes. "Though I don't see why you don't just try it and see. And fix your arm while you're at it. It's disturbing."

_I_ glared at _him_, this time. _Somebody feeling squeamish?_ I thought at Hiei, and he cracked one eye open.

_Says the woman who vomited at the sight of her own foot last night,_ he thought, and I froze before narrowing my eyes at him.

_I hope you get athlete's foot in your mouth_, I thought, sending the mental image of him sucking the poison out of my foot, and despite my wishes he actually chuckled. _You toe-licker._

"Are you two talking in your heads?" Kuwabara asked suspiciously, looking between Hiei and I with a shrewd expression.

"I wouldn't call it talking," Hiei said in a bored voice, and his eyes fell shut again. My jaw dropped. "It's not intelligent enough for that."

"Dani," Kurama said before I could send Hiei the most unpleasant thing I could dream up in revenge, "will you try to create something to test your strength? Pick whichever is easiest—an illusion or music, I don't care."

Since the music idea was the most interesting—_being a human jukebox would be pretty cool,_ I thought—I brusquely told Hiei: _Tell him I'm trying to make music._

"She picked music," Hiei said, and he thought: _Predictable. _

_Shut it,_ I thought, and before he answered I dropped into theta and fixed my arm with a pop of willpower. Then I did the most logical thing I could think of.

I tried to play a song.

I didn't rush into it, of course. By now I knew better than to jump straight into something as powerful and as wayward as the music inside me—it could sweep me away in an instant if I wasn't careful.

Inside, the music looks like a giant river streaming upward and away from me. Pulling down strands of music is like taking thread and weaving it into a tapestry, but you don't break the thread and it stays connected to the big stream, flowing long and languid and forever into nothing and everything at once. I selected a mild bass drum beat, a deep mauve that was as warm as it was cool, and I wove it into gentle pounds that beat in a rhythm not unlike a human heart. To it I added the shimmery gold warmth of a cymbal and the pale blue pop of an occasional snare.

I sat back in theta, listening and feeling the flow of my drum beats. Unlike with illusions, this song wasn't ready-made and waiting in my subconscious to be discovered as the personification of an item: it was brand new song, one I created straight out of my conscious will.

Satisfied with the drumming, I reached into the waterfall of music and pulled out thrumming violet notes that resonated like a stringed instrument (the brighter colors were violins, the darker shades cellos), and I wove them above the drumline into a new song that fit with the old like a puzzle piece. Then I plucked the small hammered notes of a piano, all soft and hard greens that dove under and above all the rest, and suddenly I realized that the song was total and complete.

It pushed me out, and I felt my body close in around me as music flooded into my ears.

I recognized the song, keeping my eyes closed as I listened to "Swimming In the Flood" by Passion Pit. The longing lyrics that screamed with loss and despair even as they burned with hope seemed to fit everything I was feeling at that moment, and then I opened my mouth to sing the lyrics.

All that came out was a croak, and, embarrassed and panicked all at once, I opened up my eyes.

The colors I had envisioned in my head swirled around me in a sphere, a kaleidoscope of notes-turned-color that pulsed around me like a heart. I could see through the sphere to the guys sitting around me, and with a start I realized that Yusuke had sat down next to Kuwabara. He waved, grinning from ear to ear, and I smiled back before looking to the sphere again.

There was the green, from the piano; the purple of the strings; the mauve of the bass and the barely-visible blue of the snare. Oh, and there was the gold from the cymbal, popping away at random, sparks of sheer brightness amid the other glowing sounds. But as I looked at it, pleased with the sound and the color and the balance between, I realized that something was missing, something that would turn this from a mere parlor trick into something _more_.

Realizing that my urge to sing was the answer, I reached out a hesitant hand, took a deep breath, and saw the music river. I grabbed a red strand, the perfect color to compliment the rest, and drew it into the real world. My eyes opened as my hand guided the red—whisper-real against my skin—into the sphere, tucking it into the unending flow just exactly where it was meant to be.

The singer's voice—male, high, and distinctly perfect—locked into the other rhythms. The lyrics swirled to life, glowing bright with emotion and pitch: What can I do?/The river's overrun/We're swimming in a flood, you know?/I thought I felt your touch/But the water's rising up…

The song, since it was complete, only ran through its rotation once before dissipating into nothingness. The bright lines around me dimmed, trembling, and between one breath and the next they vanished completely, the sphere turning to shreds that blew away on unseen winds.

"Wow," Kuwabara said, and I shot him a thumbs up. "You really are a human jukebox."

I smiled at him, but then I froze when I felt something twitching in my throat. I swallowed, adam's apple bobbing as I tried to keep the thing raging inside me from coming out. A hand went to my throat, clutching it as if to silence monster before it was born.

That didn't work, of course.

I started to cough.

Kurama was the first to act, bolting to his feet so he could dash into my tiny room in a red and brown-clothed blur. A second later he was at my side, forcing an object into my face even as his other hand held the back of my neck still. Darkness closed over my eyes, the scent of plastic and metal and rubber making my senses whirl with the sudden change. I closed my eyes and took a deep, filtered breath as Kurama's fingers twitched at the back of my head, accidentally pulling some of my hair into the gas mask's heavy elastic straps as he tightened them around my skull. The sharp pain made me flinch.

"What the hell, guys?" Yusuke said when Kurama moved away. He pulled back a bit when he saw my face, covered and ogling at him in what was most likely a very creepy way. "What the hell is _that_ thing?"

Kuwabara's face seemed to swim through the mask's hazy lenses. "Um, it's a gas mask—what are you, stupid?"

"I know what it is," Yusuke snapped. "I just don't know what it's _for_. Geez!"

"Humans react negatively to the atmosphere of the Demon World, Yusuke," Kurama said in a calm, deadly voice. He moved, every action slow and sure, to take his old seat at Yusuke's side. "Too much exposure can lead to death."

"So?"

"So," Kurama said, and our eyes met with a film of rippled glass in between, "the symptoms of prolonged exposure start with a cough."

* * *

_NOTES:_

_The song is by Passion Pit, it's amazing, and it's been stuck in my head for weeks since I have to dance to it for modern dance class. OH THE HUMANITY._

_Props to my mom for running the Chicago marathon in 4 hours, 4 minutes (I was cheering her on during the weekend, which explains my "out of town" mention)! She qualifies for the Boston marathon, something she's been aiming for for weeks! YAY! And she's 57... (*sniff*) I'm so proud! _

_So, after I posted the last chapter, people (like, ten) complained that Dani was getting mean, ignoring Kuwabara and Botan, and generally making an ass out of herself with all her Yusuke-inspired perversion, and that Koenma was MIA. Some of you liked it, but some of you were quite vocal about the dislike. Many also thought that I had "lost sight" of Dani's character by making her more snappish than usual, or that I was losing my touch, whatever that means. XD_

_I want you to know that most of the conversation with Koenma at the beginning of this chapter was written over two months ago._

_What does that mean? The change in Dani, I am sorry to say, was a planned affair, one that did not go over well with most of you even though I had barely begun to write her bitchy phase. I was going to drag it out for a few more chapters, actually, (have her be mean and short and snappish) and then have the Koenma bit during an upcoming scene, but people were so riled up over what had already happened that I decided this was needed earlier than planned._

_I guess I'm better at being a bitch than I thought I was? (*sweatdrop*) IT'S ALL MY FAULT! SORRY!_

_There's also something… else… that will relieve some of Dani's crazy I-snap-at-you-and-act-funny streak. But I can't tell you what that is or I'd ruin the fic's BIGGEST TWIST TO DATE. There are only three more twisty bits left to this story, so… be looking forward to them, I guess?_

_A lot of you also took the "morning after" comment a little too… literally? Yeah, I was just trying to be funny. (*sweatdrop*) My bad. But hey, at least we got here, right? And don't think Dani hasn't finished dealing with what happened last chapter. Soon she and Hiei have a… talk, of sorts. You'll see what I mean. XD_

_Last week was weird. I got tons of criticism for the last chapter, PLUS a dose of harsh criticism from my fiction class (short story = torn to bits) the next day, and all of it together really drained my creativity. But I think that, since I got past this bit, I'll be better next week. This chapter didn't get much done, though it does set up major shenanigans for NEXT chapter. Without that cough, we have nothing. NOTHING!_

_Anyway. Enough outta me; I'm sure you're tired of reading this by now. XD I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH, so please know that I am sincere when I say that you guys rock. Like, hard. Love you. Love you. LOVE YOU! =D Kai-Chan94, colbub, ichixichigo, Dragon of Twilight, HeeHeeHee01, DoilyRox, Heart's Icy Touch, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Koryu-Elric, Kaiya's Watergarden, WickedLovelyDream, Masuyo Shun, LadyoftheGags, dude where's my spirit gun, XAudra RoseX, NAO-chan33, destinyswindow, ovenfreshh, White Rose Fox, Otaku Wench, Wolf-Cry-Night, Alaska-Pixie, Misuzu-PM, Lurking Beneath, j.d.y., chocolateluvr13, American Senpai, Ry171819, WingThief (I love your penname!), Thekingsown, Reclun, AkaMizu-Chan, Maitza-Kururugi, Katt Jeane, the Under-Cover Fangirl, WorldsAngel, etowa-ru, TallyYoungBlood, 0nfateswings, Turtle Kid, AlyssHeart77, Foxgirl Ray, Angel of Randomosity, hieisdarkdragonchick, archangel fighter, and ShadowFireFox13!_


	41. Chapter 41: I Ran So Far Away

Future Talk

Chapter 41:

"I Ran (So Far Away)"

* * *

The cough didn't go away, not like I'd been hoping it to. It felt, for all points and purposes, like I was quite literally hacking up a lung, and every few minutes I had to lift my mask long enough to spit mouthfuls of translucent green mucus into a bowl Kurama provided with a pointedly emotionless expression (he was holding back being sick, I just knew it). The fluid didn't have much of a taste, oddly enough, but it did have the consistency of warm, under-done Jello, and that in and of itself was bad enough.

Yusuke, however, wasn't nearly as nice as Kurama. "That is _so_ gross," he kept saying whenever I excused myself to burp up more slime. "That is _gross_. I feel fine—are you sure the air is what's doing this?"

"Yes, Yusuke," Kurama kept assuring him with a suppressed grimace. "Full-blooded demons and strong psychics have auras thick enough to repel the atmosphere in this world. Dani has not had the experience to do this consciously, and she is not strong enough to do it unconsciously. The mask should help filter out the toxins her own aura cannot."

I rolled my eyes when he said that, coughing again when an inhalation set me off. Even the barest tickle to my soft palate made me hard-pressed to breathe for minutes at a time.

"I am afraid," Kurama said once the initial drama of my newest symptom (har dee har har; what was this, pick on Dani day?) wore down, "that this throws another wrench in the works."

"And we were already on the fence about this as it was," Kuwabara muttered, glancing at me with worried eyes. "Man, Dani. I'm sorry about all this."

I waved at him that it was fine, and even though I smiled I knew he couldn't see anything behind my gasmask. But, since he words confused me, I sent a thought Hiei's way: _What does he mean, you guys are on the fence? On the fence about what?_

Hiei—who sat a few feet to my left, leaning against the wall as he sat close at hand—looked at me out of the corner of his eye before directing his gaze to Kurama. "She wants to know what we discussed while she was sleeping," he said.

_You talked about me while I was unconscious?_ I thought with a touch of indignation.

_Did you expect otherwise?_ he shot back.

The others, however, weren't nearly as vocal as Hiei was in my head. Yusuke and Kuwabara exchanged a hurried look, and Kurama closed his eyes before sighing and pulling his fingers through his hair. It was obvious they were keeping something from me, and as I sat with my knees tucked up to my chest and my fingers around a bowl (the contents of which I was not keen on examining) I tried not to radiate what I was feeling: a bit angry at being in the dark, a bit frustrated for the same reasons, and more than a little woozy from my combined ailments.

_Strength_, I kept telling myself, even as my hands shook when I pushed my mask out of the way so I could spit from between chapped lips. _Be strong._

"As we discussed earlier," Kurama said in a low voice, "your already compromised limb was further damaged by your encounter with the river demon. If keeping up with us was difficult before, now it's nigh impossible."

To Hiei: _But I showed I could get around earlier—_

"She showed her mobility earlier," he said, eyes flashing at Kurama. I couldn't tell if he was defending me or urging the fox demon to cut my protests down; he was awfully hard to read sometimes, that Hiei. "She still has assets to offer."

"That was _before_ the cough set in," Kurama said patiently. His full lips had thinned into a harsh line. "Before—"

Kuwabara cut him off with a warning look, one that said 'be nice, or else'. "We were gonna let you prove your strength before we made any decisions," he said, eyeing me with a hesitant smile. "You're a part of the team, so we wanted you to make the decisions with us, you know? But we could all see how bad of shape you were in, so we weren't sure we would be OK with you coming with us after this." He licked his lips nervously. "So, that's where the 'on the fence' line came from."

_Yeah, and then I proved I could get around,_ I thought sourly.

Kurama predicted my reply before Hiei could say it for me. "And then you showed us you could walk," he said. "Naturally, we were glad you were still as mobile as before. But this cough changes things."

My hands tightened on my cane; since my palms were sweaty, they made a sharp squeaking noise as they rubbed slick skin against polished wood.

"This sickness will only get worse, Dani," Kurama said in a low voice. "There is not getting used to it or getting over it, not if you stay mired in the thing that's making you ill in the first place."

"I hadn't thought of that," Yusuke muttered.

"And frankly," Kurama said, "you're far too valuable a pawn to lose to something as mundane as an illness."

"Kurama!" Kuwabara said, face contorted into a shocked mask.

"It's true, Kuwabara," Kurama said without any hint of apology. "She's valuable. Seishou and Ryu both want her, giving us a bargaining chip should the need arise." He turned his gaze my way. "It's nothing against you, Dani. It's just the truth. I'm sure you understand that much."

Despite my own sense of rising shock and anger, I nodded at him. I was glad for my mask, for once, because it hid the shame burning in my cheeks_. Still, though… ouch,_ I said to myself, and suddenly I felt an itch in my temple. _Hiei_, came my mental groan. _Do _not_ drag this out, please!_

_Kurama's right, you know,_ Hiei said. His face, I noticed, betrayed none of his thoughts. _You're too valuable to lose like this. Just go home where it's safe._

I would have punched him in the nose if I could, but since I couldn't I just yanked my mind away from his and curled in on myself, arms snaking around my knees until I was nothing more than a ball of misery. I started coughing a seconds later, vicious lunges of lung trying to crawl out of my mouth, and everyone looked away when I lifted the mask in order to spit.

"In the end, I think the wisest decision is to take you back to the temple," Kurama said. "It is regrettable, of course, but from a tactical perspective it is the only option."

Despite seeing his point more clearly than I'd have liked to admit, I tried grasping at the last straws of my side of the argument. _But how will you manage to cross the river?_ I thought, letting my thoughts open back up to Hiei.

"She wants to know how we're going to cross the river," he said, and he shot me a dark look. "We wouldn't try it your way again, so I hardly see how this matters."

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Shut up, Hiei." To me: "I found a place where the river narrows to the north of here, and the waters are a lot calmer, too. There's ice over most of it, and if we're careful we should be able to get across with no trouble."

"Well done, Yusuke!" Kurama said.

He shrugged, grinning. "What can I say—I'm just awesome!"

"Yeah, awesomely egotistical," Kuwabara jeered, and Yusuke leaned over to sock him in the arm. Before a good-natured fight could break out, however, I grabbed my snot-bowl, my cane, and what was left of my dignity in order to stand up.

_Fine_, I sent to Hiei as I rolled onto my knees. _I'll go back to the temple. Don't think I want to and don't blame me if you need someone who actually knows what America's like, but if you all think it's good for me to leave, I will. So tell me how this retreat is gonna work so I can get on with my life. _

"She says she'll go," Hiei said, watching me. I put my good foot flat on the ground and planted my cane in the dirt. "I'll escort her to the rendezvous point right now."

Kurama, however, shook his head. "No. We must stay together. Give us an hour to gather up our things, and then we'll all—"

I tuned him out after that. _An hour_, I thought as I put my weight equally on my cane and my good leg and surged upward. _Koenma is going to be so disappoint—_

My thoughts were left hanging, however, because as soon as I managed to stand, I started staggering. The world spun, using me as a sort of center piece to revolve around, and I saw Kurama and Kuwabara's faces as I fell harshly to the left, lost my balance, and toppled over. I somehow managed to avoid falling onto Hiei, but with stars blinking at the corners of my vision I felt the word rush up to meet my body and the ground smacked into my left arm and shoulder with such force it sent my cough-bowl flying. My head collided with the ground too, making a 'thock' sound that made my ears ring like a bell at Christmas time.

Hands touched my shoulder in an instant, pushing me onto my back with more force than I preferred. I groaned, hand reaching to touch the bump on my head, but more hands tugged my fingers to my side. For some reason my focus narrowed to all the hands flying everywhere instead of the pain in my chest as I began to cough. That bout of coughing was short-lived, however, because I had so much trouble breathing that the coughs had no fuel to run on.

"Dani?" came Kuwabara's concerned voice, and then I felt two cool fingers squirm under my mask to touch my cheek.

"Her fever's back," Kurama said, but I hardly heard him because my vision was going dark. Someone roughly tugged off my mask, and after a gasp I started coughing with great bursts of pent-up air. Hands pushed me onto my side so my spasms were easier to take, and when they subsided I was pushed back onto my back. Another cool hand enveloped my forehead, making me halfway smile.

"Back with reinforcements," Kurama said dryly. The hand moved to my eyes, pulling back the lids so I could see the boys for one brief moment. "Well, she's not concussed." Before Kurama let me close my eyes again, I saw that Kuwabara looked stuck between horrified and frantic while Yusuke just looked concerned and a bit agitated. Kurama had kept his face composed, and Hiei was glaring (though why that should surprise me is anyone's guess). "This clenches it—we need to take her back, and quickly."

"Why'd you have to go and do this _now_?" Yusuke griped, and I tried opening my eyes to glare at him. Before I could manage it, however, I felt strong arms slide beneath my knees and shoulder blades.

"She needs rest and heat to burn out the fever," Kurama said. "I don't know if this is a symptom of the atmosphere or any lingering poison." A pause, and something brushed by my bad leg. I jerked away. "Take her back into the room. I'll be along to check her leg. If it's become gangrenous we should take her back to the temple without packing up."

Hiei—I could tell he was the one holding me because my face had rolled onto something that smelled like smoke and evergreen, and the arms around me were uncomfortably warm—stood up with a rush, and a few bouncing steps later I felt leaves brush across my face. _The curtain, then?_ I thought as my body was lowered onto something soft. That's when I started coughing yet again, rolling once more into the fetal position to ride out this newest wave.

A single thought floated into my brain as I concentrated on not letting my coughs destroy my already ruined throat. _My mask,_ I thought into my world's hacking haze. _My mask._

I felt him settle in behind me, chest pressing into my back as an arm draped over my ribcage. "You don't need it right now," he said. "My aura is enough to purify the air in close quarters."

The coughing died down, and for a moment the relief made my body sag. Hiei shifted behind me, knees pressing into the backs of my own, and then he said: "Kurama."

A rustle that felt too loud to be real made me wince. "Turn her over."

I had enough willpower to not need help with that, and I finally managed to open my eyes. Hiei lay on his side next to me, arm still lying across my ribs like a restraint as I tried not to think about how close his face was to mine, and Kurama knelt at my feet with pursed lips. He took my left foot into his hands gingerly, and then he rolled back my pant leg with gentle fingers.

I had tried not to look at my leg when I got dressed earlier in the day. I had tried not to pay any attention to the state of my skin, and I had tried not to notice the depth of my wounds, but I found myself fixated on Kurama's hands as he peeled back my jeans and revealed what lurked beneath.

Frankly, it was horrible. A dozen pale green pustules marred my already twisted flesh, and they wept liquid I didn't want to compare to the gunk I had been coughing up earlier. It was gross, plain and simple, and looking at it made my stomach turn.

So, I didn't look at it. I closed my eyes and grimaced, swallowing down a cry of pain as Kurama poked my leg with a finger.

"Dani."

My eyes opened. Hiei was looking down at me, eyes halfway shut as he studied my face. My expression must have been pitiable, though, because his hand clenched on my side before he spoke.

"We'll take care of you," he said in a voice barely louder than a whisper, and with a shudder I tried to smile at him. I failed, however, and ended up closing my eyes again.

"The poison hasn't spread, but it hasn't dissipated, either," Kurama said. He pulled my jeans back down over my ankle. "Keep her still and quiet. I'll pack up with the others. We need to move her, and fast."

And a rustle of plants and leaves later, Kurama was gone.

Hiei and I sat there in silence for a few seconds, and then my coughs returned. Before I knew it I was back on my side, Hiei's skin burning holes in my shirt as he pulled me tight into his chest. I'm pretty sure my whiplashing hurt him (my head snapped back and collided with _something_ at one point, and Hiei hissed as if in pain), but he never once voiced a complaint. He never talked at all, in fact, until I quit coughing and lay both exhausted and still in his arms.

"It's better that you're leaving," he said softly. I felt breath hiss over the nape of my neck.

In my head, all I could manage was: _Failed_.

Arms tightened. "Don't pity yourself," came his harsh reply. "You tried. It's more than I expected in the first place."

I would have scowled had I had the strength. _Jerk_.

"Weakling," he retorted, and when I radiated a pained expression of sheer _hurt_ at him, he said: "It doesn't matter. I'll protect you."

We sat in silence for a time, my mind drifting over nothing as fever made me shiver and sweat in alternating turns of misery. Coughs punctuated most temperature shifts, and during one of the moments my sickness made me feel like a living furnace, I tried wriggling away from Hiei with a low groan. He held on tight, however, pressing his face into my hair as he upped the temperature of his body by at least fifteen degrees.

_Too warm_, I thought at him, but he only held on more.

"We need to burn the infection out," he said, and I coughed.

_Too _warm_! _

His voice sounded like it was coming from miles away. "That's not what you said last night," he breathed, but he did give me a little more room to move.

Even in my delirious state, I managed to feel alarmed. I struggled out of sleep with a burst of sheer willpower. _What_…_? _I thought, not liking the implications of that phrase in the slightest. _What did we—?_

"Hush," he said, and those damnable arms squeezed me in. "It's nothing you need to know right now."

I would have pressed the matter had a coughing fit not interrupted me, and when the spasms subsided, I was too tired to even think.

"Just sleep, you stupid woman," he said, and he repeated: "I'll protect you."

Sleep closed in, blacking out even the feel of Hiei's vice-like embrace.

* * *

My nap was destined to be a shortlived affair. I woke to Hiei shaking me, pulling me to a sitting position, and helping me slide into my fur pants. "Can you at least _try_ not to be dead weight?" he snapped when I stared stupidly at him as he shoved my feet into boots. He was incongruously delicate in dressing me despite his words, and when he handled my injured leg it was with fingers that seemed used to handling the most fragile of crystal or glass.

"Hey, she's sick!" Kuwabara—who was standing in my little room's doorway—said with a scowl. I stared up at him as Hiei shoved my arms through my coat's sleeves, wondering why the hell he was even there, until a memory of being in Demon World penetrated my mind's fog. I turned my face to Hiei, who was buttoning me into my jacket with a snarl.

_Hiei…?_ I thought.

"We're leaving to take you back to the temple," he snapped. "Kuwabara will carry you. Just stay quiet and cooperate—do you think you can handle that, you stupid woman?"

The insult didn't even register, and I nodded. Hiei then pulled my gasmask from nowhere and shoved it into my fingers (fingers which, for the record, felt more like wooden pegs stuck onto stone-black hands).

"Wear that," he said, and he stood up and left. Kuwabara had to move aside to allow him passage, and with an odd stroke of clarity I noticed that Kuwabara was dressed to go outside.

"Um, the mask, Dani," the tall man said, and he knelt at my side to help me slide the thick rubber straps over my hair. "Shit, you're like a _doll_ when you're sick. Botan would love this."

I gave him a placated look through my goggles as he pulled my hood over my head and tightened its drawstrings around the protruding parts of my mask. He promptly sat down in front of my Indian-style and pulled up his own hood.

"Since I've got the most endurance, I'm gonna carry you back," he said. It took a bit for his words to actually _mean_ something. "Climb onto the Kuwabara express, but no complaining about the lack of snacks, OK?"

I giggled almost a full minute later, getting the joke at last, and with joints as stiff as cooked spaghetti I scoot forward until I could lean my face between Kuwabara's shoulder blades. These small movements exhausted me, of course, but with my final burst of energy I managed to get my legs on either side of his hips. Kuwabara had to reach back himself and put my arms around his neck.

_What does he smell like?_ I thought as my face lay alongside his muscular neck. _Figs?_

"Try to hold on, OK?" he asked as his hands slipped under my knees, and he yanked me flush against his back so he could stand up and not leave me stranded on the ground. He had to walk a little like a hunch-back to keep me from losing my grip (one I hardly kept around his neck because I kept forgetting to lock my fingers together), but soon enough we managed to get out of the little room and into the bigger one beyond.

I could see most of the room since my head was pillowed on Kuwabara's shoulder, and through panes of wavy glass I located Hiei standing off in the corner. He was pulling on his coat, and when he heard us he turned around and scowled.

"She's _going_ to fall off," he said in an I'm-stating-the-obvious-that-you're-too-stupid-to-notice voice.

"She won't lock her hands!" Kuwabara said, and I twined my fingers together in a self-conscious response. A few seconds later, however, they went limp.

"Cheh." The unintelligible sound was accompanied by a roll of Hiei's eyes, and he bent to tear into the pack next to him on the floor. From it he pulled a small strip of white cloth, and with it in hand he approached me and Kuwabara.

"Grab your elbows with the opposite hand," he said, and I did so with a sigh. The motion scooted me high—and into a more comfortable pose—on Kuwabara's back. Hiei promptly began to wind the white cloth around my overlapping forearms in neat circles.

_I'm like a mummy!_ I thought with a giggle. _Mummy-Dani!_

He stared at me as I peered owlishly over Kuwabara's shoulder, lips curling back over his teeth. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Hiei said, and the cloth around my arms pulled taut. "She'll stay now. Tug too hard and it'll come undone, but that's better than you choking."

"Thanks for the support, shrimp," Kuwabara said, and Hiei bristled.

_Boys, boys, boys_, I thought in a strange mockery of my mother's voice when she was being serious. _Behave!_

Hiei's eye twitched, but he obviously took my words to heart because he did not retaliate. "The others are waiting outside," he said, and he grabbed his bag off the ground before marching away. Kuwabara turned to follow him, each step sending a small bounce through me before settling onto the ground. I coughed a few times before we made it out of doors, but luckily I wasn't hit with a major fit.

I felt the cold immediately; it seeped into my clothing like a living organism bent on getting into every nook and cranny of my person. I started to shiver on Kuwabara's back, and he shot me a worried look over his shoulder.

"Are you gonna be OK?" he asked in a low voice, and I huddled into him as a raw wind stripped by.

"Give me one moment and I can make her more comfortable," I heard Kurama call. Kuwabara turned back toward the hut we had just left, and over his shoulder I saw Kurama approach the leafy building and strip off his right glove. He buried his fingers into the vines with a look of intense concentration on his face, and then the place he was touching glowed green. The whole building started to shiver in ways that the wind could not account for; with a delayed jolt I realized that the vines were creeping away in place, revealing the bare bones of the house before they crowded the ground like snaked vanishing into a burrow. The earth cracked to allow the vines inside, and soon the only evidence of the house was a large circle of bare earth cut into the otherwise frozen grass.

Kurama took a few steps forward, bent, and pulled something out of the ground. He walked around the perimeter of the circle, bending every now and again to grab something, and he dusted the objects on his pants before holding them up for us to see.

"Fire flower seeds produce enough heat to warm a person," he said, and he tucked one into my left boot. Warmth immediately flooded my foot, and with a small smile he tucked around into my other boot. The final one he slipped down the front of my jacket, where it sprouted vines with a tremor and came to rest somewhere over my sternum. The vines felt creepy, but I was in no position to complain when I felt just how nice its effects were. I stopped shivering at once.

"Mind if I snag one of those?" Kuwabara asked, and Kurama handed him a few. The rest he gave to Yusuke. Kurama and Hiei, apparently, didn't need them quite as much.

"We should get started," Yusuke said, tucking a seed into his shirt. "Should I lead?"

Kurama nodded. "I'll go second; Hiei, take up the rear. You follow me, Kuwabara."

He jumped a bit to slide me higher up his back. "Got it," he said, and his arms clenched around my thighs. "Let's roll."

We started walking without preamble, and for a while the motion of Kuwabara's steps made relaxing impossible. Soon, however, I got used to his walk's rhythm and loosened up—I loosened up so much that he had to constantly remind me to hang on, and I drifted in and out of a doze broken only by his kind and patient reminders to keep alert.

I always fell asleep on car trips as a kid. Something about the constant motion and the unbroken hum of tires on pavement lulled me like nothing else could, but this whole piggy-backing thing was turning out to have a similar effect. Between one mini-doze and the next we made the transition between the hilly plains and the squirrel-infested forest from the day before, branches passing their shadows over my face between one instant and the next…

"Damn all these squirrels," Yusuke grumbled from up ahead. "They all have spirit energy; since there's clouds of 'em it makes it hard to scout ahead." He glanced at us over his shoulder. "Kuwabara? Have you been keeping watch?"

"Sort of," he said, and I felt something inviting and open wash over me—his spirit energy, perhaps? "I was sweeping every few minutes down by the river, but…"

Kuwabara stopped dead, freezing under me like he had been hit by the White Witch's spell. This confused me, jolting me awake the way I used to wake up when we stopped driving on car trips, and what he said next made my reeling head freeze like the snow crunching underfoot.

"Something's coming," he said in a quiet tone, and he started to run. I jounced and bounced, limp and only saved from falling by Hiei's cloth on my arms and Kuwabara's grip on my legs.

We overtook Yusuke and Kurama by the time the news sunk into the others' heads; the spirit detective took point once more with a curse, dashing ahead in a flurry of power, and then Kurama was running at our side.

"How many?" he asked, voice loud over the air rushing by. The gasmask kept my eyes from drying out, helpfully enough.

"How the hell did I not notice them before?" the psychic yelled as he ran and I bounced. "Ten, twelve, fourteen… no, twice that, twenty-four!" Kuwabara's voice growled with tense anticipation. "They're riders on mounts, big ones! We can't outrun them!"

Hiei, from behind us, called: "Then we stand and fight!"

Kurama skidded to a halt as well, disappearing from sight like a ghost. Kuwabara slid in the snow to stop as well, rattling me so hard I would have fallen off had he not had a death-grip on my thighs. My head lolled backward before I snapped it front again, banging the mask on Kuwabara's shoulder so hard that the plastic and metal bumped my nose and teeth in a spark of lemon-yellow pain. My noble steed (I giggled inside at the thought) turned to face Hiei, who had taken up a fighting stance facing back the way we had come. A furrow in the snow marked our passage amid the trees; even to me, it was painfully obvious that we would be a piece of cake to track, especially since we had somehow managed to end up in a large clearing-ish thing in the middle of a copse of thick trees. We couldn't see much of the sky, of course—the trees were huge and their branches managed to touch despite how far apart their trunks were—but if you looked straight up (as I had when my head fell back) you could see about ten feet of grayness marring the dark branches overhead.

"They're coming up behind us fast," Kuwabara rumbled. "Hiei, you're the fastest, you could take Dani and outrun them to the rift while we hold them ba—"

Hiei turned in an instant. "Give her to me," he said, and Kuwabara started to let go of my legs.

"It's unwise to split up," Kurama protested, moving to stand between Kuwabara and the fire demon. Kuwabara's grip tightened. "There's more than one enemy—they could send a smaller party after you, Hiei!"

Hiei bristled. "She'll make us all vulnerable if we have to guard her—it makes more sense for me to take—"

"Um, guys? No time for this!" Yusuke said. Before I knew it he had walked in front of Hiei, facing the oncoming and as of yet invisible enemy. "Decide now before you get _all_ our butts kicked!"

"Give her to me!" said Hiei, with heat, and when he took a step forward Kurama moved to intercept him with spread arms. "Out of my way, fox!" he snarled, and he glanced at Kuwabara.

Then his eyes traveled behind us, to the forest at our backs, and his mouth opened in shock before shutting tight.

"Your interference cost me my chance to get her to safety, Kurama," he spat, crimson eyes glowing with suppressed rage. "Let it be on your head if she _dies_."

Kuwabara turned to look at the bane of Hiei's plans before I saw Kurama's reaction to that little statement, but what I saw instead was possibly even worse than the fox demon's ire. A wall of squirrels covered every branch and leaf behind us, a carpet of furry bodies coating the ground and trees in a twitching sea of beady eyes and bushy tails. It was obvious they were meant to bar our getaway, and it was even more obvious that they knew _exactly_ who we were because they were _staring_ at us with accusations reflecting bright in their little irises.

_Intruders_, they seemed to twitter. _Intruders, enemies, others._

"Holy shit," Kuwabara said with equal parts awe and horror. His voice rose an octave. "Holy _crap_! Dani, were all the squirrels in America this evil looking?"

No one got to answer him, of course. Such questions aren't meant to be answered.

The people coming to get us seemed to be thinking the same thing.

A crash alerted us to their presence first. A low rumble made the trees above our heads shake powdery snow onto our hoods, and the trees started to sway like they were alive soon after. One crash, then another, then another sounded from far out ahead, and before long a tree fell with a pop of splitting wood. It seemed to have been aimed at us, as it fell into the center of our little pod almost exactly, and the boys dodged in different directions as the huge thing came rushing down. Kurama, Kuwabara and I ended up in a tight pod on one side of the tree, separated from Yusuke and Hiei by at least thirty vertical feet of sharp evergreen branches.

Those branches didn't seem to faze our pursuers. The demons on their mounts surged down the fallen trunk like surfers riding waves as more burst out of the trees at our back. I ended up sandwiched between Kurama and Kuwabara as they stood back to back, on the defensive as we found ourselves surrounded by six demons on the backs of what looked like...

With a crackle of light Kuwabara summoned his sword down by my right leg, and I smelled the sharp scent of crushed roses as Kurama called out his rose whip in a flurry of petals.

"So girly," Kuwabara muttered, and then his muscles locked up. "Oh. Oh wow. What the _hell_ are they?"

I'm not sure who he was talking about, so I'll just start with the riders. The first thing I noticed was that they were all woman, and that they were _big_ women—at least ten feet tall at the very shortest. They were humanoid in appearance, thankfully, with five fingers on each hand and two eyes and one nose and one mouth apiece (hey, life is like this in Demon World: you never know what you're gonna get). Only, they didn't look like any humans _I'd_ ever seen, and not because of their height or the fact that they were only wearing leather loincloths and bras Xena-the-Warrior-Princess style. Each one of them was blue or green, and I don't mean green as in seasick or blue as in suffocating. Their skin was pearly, opalescent, smooth, gorgeous—just in shades of blue and green, jade and aquamarine, teal and cobalt. The darkest one had blue skin that was almost black, and the lightest had green skin that was almost white, but blue and green certainly seemed to be the unifying theme. All had hair as black as sin, though, and faces that could rival models in any human magazine…

To tell you the truth, these women looked an awful lot like taller, darker-haired versions of Hogosha.

But that's not the best part! Far from it!

All of them were riding giant squirrels.

Seriously! You think I'm kidding, but I'm really not. Each woman was perched atop the flanks of squirrels that were at least twice the size of Clydesdale horses, fuzzy ears and clawed hands and bushy tails and everything. They had leather saddles decorated with feathers and bones that clinked together in the breeze, but I had barely had time to process all of that when what was obviously the troop's leader came crawling up the fallen tree on the back of her squirrel.

To call this woman intimidating would be to call a cobra deadly—she radiated command and intensity in inordinate amounts, bright black eyes with no whites or pupil scanning the clearing the way a queen scans her throne room. Red paint on her sapphire blue skin defined war-lines with stunning clarity, and a leather helmet on her head boasted a black crest of stiff fur, like a Roman helmet gone Goth. The others on the tree moved out of her way respectfully, the spears they carried pointed straight at us even as they maneuvered away from her path.

The clearing pulsed with silence when she appeared, and when she came to a stop atop the tree, her eyes swept down to us. Eyes flashed with an emotion I couldn't name, and then she glanced at her comrades. The other women tensed.

"We mean you no harm, friends," Kurama called, and the leader's lips twitched back to reveal wickedly sharp canine teeth. With a toss of her black braids she leveled a finger straight at our pod.

The effect was immediate and short, and I assume it was mirrored on Hiei and Yusuke's side of the tree if their battle cries were any indication. The six women guarding us surged forward and attacked, three on Kurama and three on Kuwabara, swiping spears at us even as the squirrels screamed in rage. They had bigger teeth than I was expecting, teeth Kuwabara flinched away from when they snapped in his direction. I flinched too, and the combined force of our flinching made Kuwabara, to my horror, stumble. Before I knew it we had sprawled in the snow, and true to Hiei's word the cloth on my arms came undone.

Kuwabara let go of my legs and hopped up to defend me; luckily we had landed close to the tree, so I had some cover at my back. But our enemies had many hands between them, and he got knocked away from me before too long when one woman jabbed the butt of her spear into the back of his knees. The same woman got between Kuwabara and I, blocking our mutual defense, and she turned to face me as he tried to deal with the other two, and in horror I stared up at her impassive face and her raging squirrel. The beat came to stand with its front paws on either side of my body, growling face and gnashing teeth mere inches from my petrified eyes.

"Dani!" I heard Kuwabara yell, and I stared up at my soon-to-be-murderer through fearful eyes as she loomed over me, reaching down one clawed hand to surely rend my throat open—

That did not, however, happen. My eyes squeezed shut in helpless fear as I felt something thunk atop my head, and then my hood was pushed away.

Then fingers gripped the front of my gasmask.

The similarities between Hogosha and the women around us were not lost on me even as woozy as I was, and in desperation I thought of the first feminine face to cross my mind. I snapped into fevered theta and slipped the face on just before my gasmask was ripped away, taking some of my hair with it and exposing me to the cold in a shock of frigid air, and my eyes snapped open when the squirrel's rumbling growls ceased.

The woman, above me, was smiling. The squirrel no longer bared its teeth. My jaw dropped as the rider tossed the mask down at my side with a smile, and—

Wait a second.

Did she just _wink_ at me?

Unable to fathom what had just transpired and sure I was hallucinating due to fever, I watched in mute confusion as the woman who had exposed my face turned her mount away to face the still-fighting Kuwabara. My eyes darted to my left, where Kurama fought three more riders, and then I looked back at Kuwabara just in time to see one woman strike the side of his head with her spear. He fell to the ground, a wound on his temple streaming blood onto the snow, and fear made my stomach lurch and—

"Stop," I rasped, and then I pulled out all the stops I had and pushed through the pain of my sore throat to bellow: "STOP IT!"

The words, frustratingly enough, came out in English since I was already more than a little delirious without the added factor of certain death muddying the waters. Great, right? I would have smacked myself across the face for botching such an important moment had I not succumbed to a coughing session after agitating my throat so much. Mucus dripped from my lips as I hacked into the snow, feeling the slime freeze on my face as I rode out the cough on all fours.

I didn't realize just how quiet it had gotten until my coughing stopped.

The woman had all frozen around my friends, heads turned my way to stare at me in shock. I stared back, trying to ignore the frost biting my skin as I gave them an uncertain look in return. Kuwabara—who had been kneeling on the ground in a wounded daze—was looking at me like I was an alien (I guess he didn't know English when he heard it) and Kurama looked like an action movie on freeze-frame: his whip was wrapped around one woman's neck, and he'd halfway pulled her out of the saddle with one of her feet still clinging to a stirrup. Her fingers had dug beneath the whip to keep it from decapitating her, but even as she stood in the snare of death itself she had taken the time to stop and look at me.

A clatter of wood and claws behind my back, however, drew my vision away from that tableau. I craned my head around to see the leader woman driving her mount off of the tree, one fist held in the air to signify a stop in the skirmish. The others moved out of her way and backed off of Kurama and Kuwabara, surrounding them in a loose circle as my two friends resumed their back-to-back position. The woman Kurama had been dealing with had freed herself during the lull in the fight, and she scrambled back into her saddle to go with her friends.

The leader came to rest above me on the tree. I would have been looking up at her had she been on even ground, anyway, but on the tree she was purely massive. Her eyes bored into my own like drill bits, and then she opened her mouth to speak.

She spoke in English.

"Why should we?" she asked in a velvety soft voice, one that hovered in the lower alto range. Her tone carried no hints of malice or bloodlust—just curiosity, and maybe a little humor. It threw me off since I was expecting more of the former and _definitely_ more Japanese. "They were trying to carry you off."

"No!" I swallowed, trying not to cough or flinch as the snot in my nose and my tear ducts started to freeze over. "They were only trying to protect me," I croaked, pushing away my pain and cough. "You… you startled us."

Her eyes traveled over Kurama and Kuwabara, and then they alit on me. I realized, then, that she was stunningly beautiful even if those all-black eyes did creep me out.

"Are _they_," she asked with a sweep of her massive hand, "yours?"

I floundered.

The amazon's brow furrowed like folded satin. "_Are_ they?" she persisted, this time letting a little force seep into her voice. "_Well_?"

"They're mine," I blurted, because I didn't know what else to say.

My words seemed to satisfy her, thank GOD, but then I started coughing again. When I finished and looked up at her, I saw that she finally looked angry.

"They are good men," she said in a slow, deliberate way, "if they protect their mistress so fiercely. But to allow you to sicken is a transgression you must punish them for." She tossed her head, the plume atop her helmet waving in the air. "We shall heal you. Tell your men we mean you no harm, and to follow my sisters without resistance. They will be returned to your side once we exchange proper greetings."

I glanced behind me, looking first at Kuwabara and then Kurama.

"Dani?" Kuwabara said, face contorted into a confused mask. "Dani, what are you two _saying_, and whose _face_ is that?"

"They… they said they won't hurt us if we go with them peacefully," I managed to rasp. I didn't bother answering his second question. "They want to heal me."

"But they can't—" Kurama started to say, and I shook my head.

"Don't argue, Kurama!" I said, adding force into my voice. So much talking was growing unbearably painful, and the edges of my vision had begun to dance and blue. My elbows, holding my torso up as they were, buckled as fatigue made being awake difficult. "You have to _trust_ me on this one, OK?"

"What are you telling them?" the leader said, and I looked back up at her.

"They want to know where we're going," I said.

One black eyebrow rose. She pointed into the trees. "Across the river is our camp. We will heal you and talk. Satisfied?"

I nodded numbly, and before I knew what was happening she had spurred her squirrel forward and leaned out of her seat. She caught me by the waist and pulled me in front of her, sidesaddle and dazed as my head lolled against her mostly naked chest. I was little bigger than a child in her arms, and her body was so warm that I…

Kuwabara's cry of "Dani!" startled me into wakefulness as the leader turned her mount back the way we had come. The squirrel's stride was smooth even as it moved across the uneven tree.

"Go with them and don't _hurt_ them!" I called as loudly as I could. It felt like fire was racing around my throat. When I saw Kurama and Kuwabara's faces start to form protests, I said in the most authoritative voice I could muster: "Do as I say _now_ or we may not get out of this in one piece. _Trust me_. Go!"

The leader had finished turning at that point, and I lost sight of them standing amid a circle of six squirrel-riding amazons. Spent, I allowed her to cradle me close and drive us away. I never saw Yusuke and Hiei, but my worry for them got lost in the dark as my drained body melded into the warmth of the giantess's side, and slept.

_

* * *

_

_NOTES:_

_What the HELL, MAN? Giant women riding giant squirrels that speak ENGLISH? WHAT? And who does Dani look like right now?_

_Why do I feel like Drunk-Dani and Delirous-Dani are kind of similar?_

_Ahem. I feel like this isn't going to go over well with some of you. But I told you that the cough set stuff up, and now… well, some really plot-heavy things happen next chapter. DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU._

_I have been beset with, like, six plotbunnies in the last week that I REALLY want to write, but I feel like I have to finish at least one story before I start another. EEK. How the heck am I going to handle this?_

_I'm sorry if my note last week was emo and stupid. My life right now is really dark, and I feel like my behavior has been suffering because of it. I try to be as cheerful as possible as often as possible, but sometimes I get… weird. Again, I apologize for that. I try to keep my personal life as separate from our happy home here on the internet as much as I can._

_On another note, I love you guys. Like, lots. TONS. You're all perfect. Yeeeah. It's been awful week on my end but I know it gets better, so thanks for your support. ^^ You guys rock! Dragon of Twilight, cranberryben, Kai-Chan94, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, chocolateluvr13, AkaMizu-Chan, White Rose Fox, Koryu Elric,dumbrat, Wings of Silver Rain, colbub, DoilyRox, Reclun, Angel of Randomosity, LadyoftheGags, Wolf-Cry-Night, Foxgirl Ray, Turtle Kid, Too lazy to log in and review (lol!), HeeHeeHee01, Kaiya's Watergarden, Misuzu-PM, Masuyo Shun, WorldsAngel, KattJeane, DevilAngelWolf27, etowa-ru, AlyssHeart71, j.d.y., rainchant, Dudewhere's my spirit gun, XAurdaRoseX, fanficreader, undercoverprep, DaAmazingMeepers,Willowleaf2560, ShadowFireFox13, Naitza-Kururugi, and 0nfateswings!_


	42. Chapter 42: What's the Story?

Future Talk

Chapter 42:

"What's the Story, Morning Glory?"

* * *

I can't say I remember much about the trip to wherever it was the amazons lived. After all, sleeping was just _so_ much more important than knowing where the hell in the three worlds I was, now wasn't it, and I'm not one to get my priorities mixed up, no sir.

All of that, in case you couldn't tell, was sarcasm.

I woke up on my back in a warm, dark place, and something cool and damp surrounded my left foot like a calming mist. It was too dark to see anything at first, but after a few blinks and a squint I realized that I was staring up at a crisscrossing network of wooden poles, and above that there was… well, darkness. The ground beneath my body was soft and cushy, and when I shifted I felt hundreds of small hairs rub against my skin in silky bundles.

_Fur_, I realized when my hands fisted into the thick stuff. _I'm lying on fur._

_But… how the hell did I _get_ here?_

I had to think hard to remember what had gone on the day before, and when I remembered fleeing Demon World and my run-in with the amazons, my whole body tensed. Where was I, where had they taken me, was I in danger, where were the boys, were they OK, what—?

"Oh," said a voice. "You're awake."

My eyes popped open wide as I struggled to get my elbows underneath me, but then a hand the size of a smoldering trashcan lid pressed into my back and lifted me upright. A dark shape knelt at my side, and then something curved and firm pressed against my lower lip. The bowl tipped a warm tea into my mouth, one that tasted like murky leaves and a touch of what I thought was honey.

"For your throat," said my benefactor, and as I looked up at her in confusion I began to see more clearly the way her all-black eyes glittered in the gloom. She was a lighter skinned woman with flesh like sea-foam jade, and she had tied her hair into a single braid. Her only clothing was a white cloth draped loosely about her body like a toga; she wore no jewelry or face paint or anything to set her apart. "Please, drink it all."

I did as she asked, letting her hold both me and the bowl up so I could concentrate on drinking. I didn't feel feverish anymore, that was good, but nerves made me twitch at every motion my newest 'friend' made.

"Your throat has been ravaged, but not beyond my skill," my captor said in a deep, soothing voice. Her body radiated so much comforting heat that sleep threatened to drag me down again. "I take it you had a run in with Sioh—the river's guardian?"

Surprised that the thing responsible for my pain had a name, I could only stare up at her in shock. A fire I had not noticed before crackled in a pit a few feet away; my furry bed—more like a small mountain of animal skins than a true bed—lay up against the wall of the building, opposite a wooden door that stretched nearly fifteen feet tall.

"Sioh's poison shuts down the respiratory systems of its land-walking prey, making them easier to drown," she went on, still holding me and watching me drink. I had gained enough strength to hold the bowl myself, though she still had to brace my torso to keep it upright. "A hacking cough and odd mucus patterns are the most obvious symptoms of her venom attack, but the dressing on your leg will neutralize what poison still remains locked in the flesh."

I froze, mouth full of tea as I processed my true diagnosis. _I'm not allergic to the air?_ I heard myself think, and I suppressed a trembling smile_. I'm… not dying!_

"The tonic you're drinking now will further chase the poison away," she said. "I forced it down your throat while you slept, and I gave you fever-breaker as well. You should feel fully recovered in little more than a day." She then said the words that made me want to kiss her: "Strong talking should be feasible in only a few hours." A smile directed downward made me shoot a hesitant grin back. "I am Karla. I am a healer, and now you are healed."

I opened my mouth to speak, but she placed a massive finger against my lips and shook her head.

"Not yet," she admonished, and she laid me back down and took away my empty tea bowl. "I must tell the others that you have awoken. Please, relax."

It took only a few seconds for her to leave the room, and when she did I sat up to take a look around. The only exit was the massive door Karla had used to leave, and the walls seemed to be made of thick, light-blocking canvas stretched over poles—an overlarge teepee is what it felt like, only it was shaped more like a dome than a cone. The fire was smokeless and odorless, strangely enough, but it still seemed to require wood to fuel it; over it hung a kettle the size of a basketball. An open box full of glass vials and powders and packets lay at the fire-pit's side, and with a sinking heart I realized that my cane, my gasmask, and my backpack were all missing.

I was, thankfully, clothed, although not in my good old familiar ones. A light dun-colored robe had been belted at my waist; I was naked underneath. Around my bad leg was a bundle of white cloth about the size of a volleyball, wrapping it up tight in coolness and clean pressure.

_Escape,_ I thought as I looked at my bound foot, lack of shoes, and thin clothing, _is not exactly feasible at this point. Why me?_

The door clattered open, startling me, but when I tried looking out of it all I saw was more darkness. Karla's bulk obscured most of the outside anyway, though, and with a gulp I placed her at roughly nine and a half feet tall. _Holcrapholycrapholycrapholycr_—

"I am to take you to the Grand Mother," she said, coming forward. I shrank back a little when she knelt and held out her arms, and when she saw this she put her fists on her hips. "I will not hurt you, Sister," she said like it was the most obvious thing in the world, and she did not allow me to get away again. Long arms grabbed me and pulled me toward her, cradling my body against her chest like I was nothing more than a reluctant toddler.

_I could probably only reach her belly-button if I stood next to her, anyway_, I thought sourly as she carried me toward the door. I was more or less sitting on the crook of her right elbow, hips and torso pressing tight against her chest. She opened said door with her left hand, and we entered another room that was roughly the same shape as the old one. This one, however, was nearly three times as big, and if you were to look straight across the room and past the fire burning in its center, you would see something very strange indeed.

I can't call it a throne because it was made of bones and feathers and it was only a few feet tall, anyway. It didn't have legs and sat on the dirt floor like a glorified and spiky cushion, with a back that stretched to the ceiling and dripped with the claws of slain beasts and the skulls of those who had fallen to the amazons' spears. Other chairs—ones that didn't bear quite as much decoration or height—ringed the room. There were thirteen such chairs in all if you were to count the biggest one among them, and all of them bore a single giant woman.

The twelve women on the smaller thrones were all older. Not _old_, mind you, just old_er_, probably the human equivalent of someone in their 50s or early 60s. I counted a few 30-somethings and one twenty-something, too, but their chairs were placed farthest from the big throne (and closest to the door the healer took me through) so I assumed that those women were less important that the others. Their thrones in particular seemed less extravagant than the ones near the big chair, too, so I deduced—as my healing buddy carried me to the edge of the fire-pit and set me down on a small fur cushion—that age meant a lot to these people.

Considering that the woman on the big chair was ancient helped me figure that out, too.

"Relax," Karla whispered in my ear as she stood up. A hand caressed my hair as I turned to stare pleadingly at her all-black eyes. She was nice to me; I didn't want her to go. "We mean to befriend you should you prove innocent." She smiled. "Tell all truths. I will see you soon."

And then she left, just like that. When the door shut behind her the weight of the women's stares came crashing down, so I turned to their leader in hopes of lessening that heaviness.

_Let's just pray I don't royally screw this up,_ I thought, and as I took a deep breath I met her eyes.

The old woman on the throne stared at me through the smokeless bright in the fire-pit, features obscured by the light and the flickering flame, and then she raised her hand. In it was a short staff that looked suspiciously like some sort of thighbone, and when she waved it the feathers tied to the end rustled together. I realized, then, that the room was dead silent. No crackle from the fire, no rustling from the women, no nothing: just my heartbeats hammering in my chest and the feathers on the stick, rush-rush-rushing together like whispers in the dark. The fire dimmed in time to the sound, and soon it was nothing but embers that jumped and played with one another in silence.

My eyes lingered on them. _Great_, I thought. _They're _magical_ amazons. Just great._

"You have traveled far."

My head snapped up, lips tightening when I saw the woman regarding me through cool eyes. Since the fire was gone I could see her clearly at last: hair, black streaked through with grey and twined with feathers and bones and beads; eyes, black throughout and nestled deep in lines and wrinkles and creases that spoke of years of life and wisdom. I froze in the light of those eyes, unable to rid myself of the feeling that I was nothing more than a bug beneath their gaze. I could hardly take in her black robes and skin so pale a blue it was almost white, glowing low like a ghost in the dark.

"I must offer my regrets," she said in a voice that had been hoarsened and softened, both, from years of whispering and screams. It was the voice of the goddess of crones, I was sure, and a part of me envied it for the power in each syllable. "We do not often receive visitors, Sisters they may be."

My mouth opened. Then it closed.

The old woman saw my confusion. A gnarled hand waved through the murky air. "You speak the Sacred Tongue. Only Sisters speak as such." Her eyes froze me again, stopping my thought of _Sacred… does she mean English? _"But your men spoke Common, not Sacred, and Reika—" She saw my questioning look in a millisecond and accommodated for it. "Reika led the hunting party you ran afoul of. She heard your men speak Common and assumed you were an enemy, until you beseeched her mercy in Sacred." A smile broke through her wrinkled lips, showing pointed white teeth that age had not tarnished. "A true Sister you are for not letting your men befoul the Sacred Tongue."

I ducked my head in submission because it felt like the right thing to do, and when I looked up again her smile had faded until it merely hovered behind her mouth, present but not showy.

"It has been many years since an outsider who knows the Sacred Tongue has come to us," she said. "The only visitors to our land are murderous men and their greedy ways, looking for unplundered territory in these parts. Reika assumed, as small as you are, that your men had subjugated you."

Around me, the silent women hissed as one, teeth bared and eyes narrowed into leers of rage. The old woman raised a fist to silence them, and they obeyed with a hush.

"But we were wrong," she said. "You have truly upheld the ideals of the Sisters in keeping your men obedient as you do, and in keeping the Sacred Tongue holy by keeping it from them. We welcome you as our new Sister, bound in spirit by tradition."

A thrum of murmuring made the air buzz in my ears. The women of the circle were humming low in their throats, tuneless and rich and unified. The old woman raised her hand again, and they quieted like smashed bees.

"But," she said, "something mystifies me still." The breath caught in my throat. "How is it that you, a Sister by spirit but not by blood, can know the Sacred Tongue and the ways of keeping?" Her smile returned, though this time it held an edge. "I am the Grand Mother, Sister from afar, and I am old. I have never met you before, and you are not yet aged enough to come before my birth. When and where did you learn our ways?"

Mouth dry, I could only stare at her. However, I need not have worried about speaking because the Grand Mother had raised her staff again and begun to chant. The nonsense syllables revolved around my head, and her eyes fell shut when the other women joined in. I shifted in my seat, rising into a kneel as the words spiraled so close I could almost taste them…

The Grand Mother's eyes opened, and the chanting stopped. Her smiled came back again, though its warmth had increased. I knew not why.

Her next words made my blood run quicker, and I sat Indian-style in a daze. "You are a shapeshifter!" she said, leveling a finger at me. For a second I feared she was going to accuse me of not being a woman, or being an enemy, or something, but she didn't and just smiled more broadly. "And the colors of your spirit, they are familiar to me."

My thoughts on this?

_Wait. What?_

"Many years ago I met a shapeshifter who resonated as you do—she was a being of strength and respect who adhered to the traditions of Sisterhood with fierceness unmatched." Before that could even _begin_ to sink in she struck another blow in the form of an innocent question: "Are you her child, perhaps, or a blood sister?"

I opened my mouth to start babbling before I remembered that my body had been around for a lot longer than my consciousness had, _what if I'm living in the body of that same demon, what would that entail?, _but she shushed me.

"You need not tell me; I know shifters are notorious for the secrets they keep," she said. Not for the first time, I felt like this Grand Mother person was doing all the cover-story work for me. "A daughter or a sister—any kin of hers is kin of mine." A pause. "But, may I ask if she was the one who taught you our ways? She lived among us in my childhood, and many loved her."

Not knowing quite how to get out of that one without lying or making a fool out of myself, I just played along with a nod. Then I decided to get creative.

"My mother," I said, and my voice rasped like sandpaper before exploding into dry coughs. These weren't hacking river-monster coughs, however, but rather ones born of a simple dry throat, and each one was a painful blessing. The Grand Mother waited until I had recovered, not interrupting my spasms even once.

"My mother," I continued hoarsely, "taught me only a fraction of your ways before she died. Please, forgive any ignorance I show."

Her eyes crinkled. "We shall teach you what she could not with gladness. Sisters will never abandon Sisters."

"I thank you," I said, and thought: _And now it's time to endear myself to the natives._ "I have always wanted to… make pilgrimage, to see you and the place she thought of as home." The English words felt both strange and familiar in my mouth, and with a pang I had realized just how much I missed speaking it. Not that my hoarse voice and dry mouth did very well on delivering my lines, but still…

Her features brightened. "You wish to seeks the blessing of the Bright Lady, then?" she said. The other women buzzed again, but this time they did not get shushed.

"I… yes," I said. Playing along seemed like the best option at that point. "Yes. I wish to receive her blessing."

"What bring you to please her?"

I floundered, unsure of what she meant—who was the Bright Lady, and what exactly was I supposed to bring her?—and when I did nothing but gape her smile vanished.

"You did not bring tribute?" she said, and I shook my head. Belatedly, something told me that coming empty handed had been a very bad idea indeed.

"I am a wanderer by nature, Grand Mother," I rasped, brain firing off ideas like fireworks that wouldn't help me get anywhere. "I have few possessions to my name. My… men, and I…" I coughed for a few seconds, then said: "We carry what we can on our backs." My fists tightened on my lap.

"So you bring nothing?" she said, voice dropping to a hiss, and I shook my head again. I had an idea, though it was a shot in the dark and I was fast becoming used to the idea of offering up Yusuke as a sacrifice (not that he'd like that, but still, I'd bet the boy could take it).

"I am a… bard," I said, not knowing what word to use in its place. "I know many songs, and I know songs from this land's past." _Well, from another reality's version of it, but you don't need to know that. _"If I may, I could please the… Bright Lady, with my gift of song."

The Grand Mother's eyes reflected little for a time, and the others continued to hiss and buzz. I felt their eyes on me, unrelenting and accusatory, and I added in a fit of desperation: "I can sing in the Sacred Tongue. I'm good at that."

I started to cough again; so much talking on my injuries was painful to say the least.

"I am skeptical," the Grand Mother said when I was through, and the others fell silent. "I have not heard songs from this land's past, nor unknown songs in the Sacred Tongue." She waved her stick through the air, hunched shoulders rolling beneath her plain robes. "Sing for me, then, to prove your worth."

I swallowed, nerves kicking into high gear. "May I… have a moment to prepare?" I asked, and she nodded.

"You need no instruments?"

I mutely shook my head. "I play… in my own way," I said after a time, and I placed my hands flat on the ground in front of me. My fingers splayed out in two fans, my thumbs and forefingers creating a teardrop of space in the dirt.

_OK,_ I thought. _Deep breathing, Dani, because you gotta THINK—what the hell can you sing for these people?_

My breathing became rhythmic, measured, consistent… but hurried. I couldn't keep it calm no matter how hard I tried.

_There's too much riding on pleasing them to choke up,_ I told myself. _Think, think, THINK! What would these people like?_

My adrenaline started spiking as I breathed like a woman chased. Breathing quickly meant breathing shallowly, however, and I felt my head float as each breath brought in less oxygen than the one before.

_I think they'd like a female singer more than a male one,_ I decided, keeping my breath running fast_. And something epic, maybe classical, or an opera… _

My head floated higher; my throat stung with every pant.

_But wait—these people are warriors,_ I realized with a curse. _Opera's too clean for them. I need hard music, but classical, but what's both hard and classical and female all at once—_

I slipped into theta, hardly aware of what was happening at all, and as I floated in my own head I felt my subconscious push the answer forward. I felt dumb for not realizing it while I was awake—my own breath had reflected my choice the entire time!

_Of course,_ I thought as I grasped the colors that would bring the song to life.

_Nightwish._

I pulled the color forward in theta: the piano strained with pale blue tingles, the strings with shades of purple, the drums gold and the synth all sorts of reds and mauve. But it was the fluting forest-green and jade shades of the singer's soprano that really made the song simmer and hum to life, and when I wove all the music and color into a tapestry of sound and found myself getting pushed away as my consciousness and the song were, in the same moment, birthed into the waking world…

I realized that I had known what song to play all along when I heard the way my own breath fell perfectly into the intro's rhythm, and I stared down at the teardrop-shape of my fingers as a sphere of lights and sounds cupped me in its center. It lit up the room like lightning, drowning out the embers in the fire-pit the way the sun blots out the stars.

_Running for her life,_ Annette's voice sang, _the dark rain from her eyes still falls. Breathtaking butterfly chose a dark day to leave; save one breath for me! A loner longing for the cadence of her last breath…_

Unwilling to face judgment so soon and despite my love of the song I'd picked, I did not look at the Grand Mother and just stared down at my hands as the music sphere roared its way through the piece, neon electric guitar and growling black bass joining the fray to add dynamic and punch. It was a warrior's song, to be sure, and I could only hope that they would like it…

A male's voice came into the song during the last verses, but I had anticipated this and instead used a strain of my own voice to speak _run away, run away, run away, run!_ where it was supposed to go. Other than those few moments, I kept my harsh hyperventilation consistent throughout the entire four-minute song, and when the last moments rose to a deafening crescendo around me I felt like I had run a marathon. Sweat coated my neck and the spot between my shoulder blades; my shoulders had cramped from leaning on my hands for so long. Then the streams of music unwove and disappeared even as I kept my breath in place, and soon I had to stop that, too, for fear of looking like a nervous idiot in front of the Sisters.

When I could avoid it no longer, I looked back up at the Grand Mother.

To my immense relief, she was smiling.

"In two days," she said above the murmur of the other women—a murmur, I was pleased to note, that seemed pleased, "we will journey to the Bright Lady's side after partaking in the Hunt. You will participate in this?"

"I will," I said, because I didn't know what else to say and thought that the Hunt sounded a _bit_ more morbid than I liked…

"And you will play your music at the feast before we honor her with gifts," she continued. "You will play many songs for her, and our, pleasure." Wrinkles deepened in simple happiness. "I have not seen a power like yours in many years. It pleases me greatly to welcome you into our family, Sister. The gifts of one can do good for many. Perhaps you would be willing to share your music with our own musicians?"

"And I am honored to be of service," I said, bowing again over my hands until my forehead almost touched the dirt. Unbound hair pooled on the ground, but I didn't much mind.

"I am sure you wish to comfort your men," said the Grand Mother when I rose. "Doubtless they have suffered greatly in your absence."

_You have no idea,_ I thought with wry humor, and I had to suppress a smirk.

"In fact, I was told that one of your charges became quite violent upon seeing you carried off," she said, and a speck of displeasure crept into her face. "He would have killed one of our Sisters had her comrades not intervened."

My response was automatic. "For that I offer my most humble and heartfelt apologies," I said, and I bowed again. My face flushed as I stared at the dirt. "I was ill and they were desperate. It is my fault for being unable to… _control_ them." I figured she was talking about Kurama's rose-whip noose, and the way he had pulled one Sister from her saddle. Then again, it wasn't like I'd seen Yusuke and Hiei fight, so…

"And it was _their_ task to keep you safe," she said in disapproval. I did not come out of my bow, blushing even more. "You must punish them for failing in this."

I swallowed before saying: "I will, Grand Mother."

"The fire demon, especially."

My head snapped up, looking at her in shock. Or something. I don't really know what I was feeling in that moment.

"He was the most violent of them all," she said. "A fierce man, to be sure, but one who lacks restraint. He would do better with you to rein him in, but I commend you in choosing one so dedicated to protecting his master."

I gaped at her, wondering how the _hell_ Hiei would react to hearing him referred to as my _property_, of all things, and then I ducked back into my bow before an image of his rage could form. _Just play along, just play along…_ "He means well but is… hasty," I mumbled. _And infuriatingly possessive, stupid freaking _jerk_!_

"It is nothing. He was subdued by his more thoughtful brothers before any real damage could be done."

I looked up at her; she wore patience like a mantle.

"Your men are being kept away from the men we keep ourselves; doubtless, you will wish to lodge with them until other, more permanent, arrangements can be made." She paused. "Do you plan on staying with us for long?"

I hesitated, not sure how to tell them 'no' without sounding callous. "I am a wanderer by nature," I said slowly, "and though I wish to remain with you and learn all I can, I am afraid that the urge to move might take me. I do not want you to think I would leave without reason, but when that urge strikes, I…"

"Say no more!" the Grand Mother said, raising her staff in a form of declaration. The motion made her long sleeves fall back, exposing age-spotted skin and sagging flesh. There were still muscles ripping beneath time's wear; I could see her strength in every line. "Your mother was the same, though she always returned to her Sisters in the end." She turned to the woman on her right, a husky Sister with broad shoulders, skin so deep a green it was almost black, and strips of red-dyed hair that spiked off the top of her black dreadlocks like a rooster's crest. She wore a hardened leather breastplate and a necklace of talons. "Krishna. Have your tribe take our friend—" Here she paused and looked back at me. "Your name, Sister. I know shapeshifters have neither a true name nor a true face, as your mother said when she dwelled among us, but what do you wish for us to call you?"

That threw me for a loop. "I am… Elaine," I said, mind groping for my middle name because I had no idea what else to use.

"Ee-lay-nah," said the Grand Mother, and I thought:_ Gee, if Dani is Donny and Elaine is Elaina, what the hell would Thompson turn into?_ "Sister Elaina. Go with Sister Krishna. She will take you to your men. Prepare them for the hunt after two day's time." She raised her staff and swept it across the space before her. "Go in peace, and rest well."

My shoulders relaxed when the realization that I had survived this encounter _and_ gotten us all inside this place safely sank in, but then something else made the tension return. "But please," I said as Krishna rose from her seat and took a step toward me, "a question, if I may?"

The Grand Mother's face grew wary. "You are a Sister, now, and we will seek to educate you as best we may," she said despite her apparent misgivings. "Ask it of us."

I took a deep breath before spinning a further layer of story atop the old. "I am a wanderer by nature," I said, "and I am a collector of stories from days of old and days of new. I have heard rumors of a land raining from the sky to make this place, but I wish to know the truest truth. Perchance you know more?" I was going out on a limb with this and I knew it—would they even have been around when America fell into Demon World?—but the chance of finding out more about this place was too juicy to pass up.

My instincts, much to my triumph, seemed correct. The Grand Mother hesitated, glancing at the Sisters sitting around the circle like unmoving statues. The only things that moved on them were their eyes, which roved too many places for me to follow.

When the Grand Mother continued to not answer, I added: "I wish to compose a verse about the Sisters, and… and the Bright Lady and her beginning." More silence. Another addition: "To honor her and your people?"

At that, the Grand Mother answered me in a solemn tone. "It is our custom," she said, "to tell the story of our origin at the feast after Hunt, before we honor Her with our gifts. It is a story we are all a part of, and having one Sister tell the tale would deprive it of its beauty." She gifted me with another smile. "I cherish your desire to honor Her with songs, because yours are beautiful indeed. So please, wait until we tell it together, for you will not see the tale's true beauty until then."

I couldn't do much besides agree with her. "Yes, Grand Mother," I said, bowing again, and then Krishna stepped forward and knelt at my side. I stood, shorter than she was even though she was down on one knee, and with a nervous and trembling smile I allowed her to scoop me up into her massive arms. Her face betrayed little emotion.

"Now go back to your men," said the Grand Mother. Krishna stood up; she must have been eleven feet tall. "You all need your rest before the feast, where we will glorify our Lady as best we can."

* * *

Krishna led me through a door I hadn't seen before, and the minute we left that dark place my eyes were blinded by watery grey light. I pressed my face into her leather-wrapped chest with a groan, fingers fisting into my robe when a headache cut my world in half. I could tell we were outside from the openness of the air and the breeze on my skin, but to my utter surprise the air was misty and…

… warm?

"Small Sister," Krishna rumbled in a voice deeper than any I'd heard from the Sisters, "are you in pain?"

"… a little," I admitted with a hiss.

She didn't say anything, but she did stop walking. Around us I heard voices, high and deep and all registers in between, chatting away like nothing was amiss. All were feminine. Scents of bodies and, _and_ _was that sulfur_?, and things like bread and fruit and roasted meat made the warm air sing in my nose.

"Karla," said Krishna, and I felt a hand on my arm. Another gripped my chin and turned my face away from Krishna's chest, and I cracked my eyes open to find the healer woman staring intently into my face. Her fingers squeezed my cheeks, making my lips pop open in a thoroughly unattractive way that allowed her to place a pill behind my bottom teeth.

"Swallow," she said, and I did. The pill had been coated in something that felt like honey, making it go down as smooth as silk. "It will help your headache. I predicted that light would hurt you."

"Thank you," I said, and to my utter astonishment I felt my headache abate enough for me to open my eyes in full.

The Sisters' settlement was huge and bustling—it was also not what I expected in the slightest. I had thought it would be all native looking, with lots of teepees or something, but around us lay a honeycomb of tall houses made of silvery stone. Most were two or three stories tall, though a few were higher, and the streets were paved with the same stone as the houses. Roofs of brown tile made the whole place look like something out of old-timey Boston. Or something. It was more modern than I had hoped, to say the least. Blue-and-green skinned women walked down the streets, in and out of houses, past each other like humans would, stopping to chat with friends along the way, and for some reason the entire scene looked… homey, somehow.

_It's like something out of a sci-fi Christmas card,_ I thought when I noticed the snow on the rooftops._ But how is there snow when it's this warm? And how the hell _isit_ this warm, anyway?_

My thoughts were interrupted when Krishna started walking. Well, turning. She pivoted away from Karla on her heel to face the building we had left, and when I saw it my brow furrowed. It was made entirely of wood and tanned hides, looking oddly out of place amongst the rest of the stone city. Five or six domes connected around a bigger center dome made the building resemble a beehive, but as Krishna walked around the building I saw that one dome was open on most sides.

In it were the squirrels.

The giant ones.

Krishna chuckled when I shrank into her chest. "Don't be frightened," she said as we went under the dome. Looking up revealed a network of thick poles, on which lounged more squirrels and several Sisters. When they saw Krishna, five women jumped down to the dirt floor to meet her.

"She's even smaller than they say," said one, looking at me the way most people look at puppies. She had aqua skin and many piercings, with metal shards woven into her hair like a shrapnel bonnet. "How sweet! Like a little child, she is."

"This is my hunting party, Elaina," Krishna said to me, and she tilted her strong face with its square jaw and angular cheekbones toward the ceiling. A piercing whistle made me wince, and a squirrel detached itself from its perch to land with a horrendous thud on the ground a dozen yards away. If I had thought Krishna was big, this squirrel made her look like a Life-Size Barbie Doll. "This is my mount. He will not harm you."

The squirrel came over, nuzzling its owner's face with a twitter that would have befitted a much smaller creature. Then it started to investigate me with its nose, sitting up on its back paws so its deceptively agile fingers could grab my arm and peer into my face with eye the size of plates. Its hand was very warm and it could have snapped me like a toothpick had it wanted to, and I guess I looked nervous because it reached back, grabbed its tail with its other hand, and used the tip of the bushy limb to tickle my face. I couldn't help but laugh and think that the beast was cute (not to mention smart) in spite of myself.

"Like a _baby_!" said the one with the piercings as the squirrel scrambled off.

I frowned at her. "I'm quite old, thank you," I said, though not unkindly, and she blinked.

"Sassy thing," she said, grinning, and she took my face in one gigantic hand. I tried not to move; no sense in angering someone who could squish me with their shoe. "And not bad to look at, if you like children." She smoothed my hair. "Such pale blue eyes, and her hair is such a pretty golden color. I've never seen the like."

My brow furrowed. _Blue? Blonde? What?_ It took a minute to remember that my current face was not my own, and the memory made it all make sense.

But metal-lady wasn't done. Her eyes flickered toward my waist and legs, the latter of which were exposed through the long slit in my robe's front. "I wonder… " she said, and she smiled a smile to put Yusuke's to shame, "does everything _match _down _there_?"

Krishna jerked me away with a snarl. "Our guest is not your plaything, Sarka," she rumbled, but I was too busy being horrified that _someone had just asked me if the carpet matched the drapes_ to realize she was approaching her squirrel with myself in tow. She jumped onto its saddled back without jostling me at all, and she sat me in front of her with a scowl as she passed a leather strap connected to the beast's bit and bridle into my hands. Its back was too wide to straddle, so I rode with my legs to one side. "Hold that or you'll fall off." She tossed her hair toward the others. "We have to take her to her men. One of you take Karla and fall in!"

For those interested, riding a squirrel is like riding a wave. Its front paws go into the air but its back legs _don't_ until the front legs come down, then the process repeats in reverse. The muscles undulated in a rolling rhythm I could barely fathom, and my knuckles turned white from holding the harness as Krishna directed her mount over the stone streets. Other Sisters got out of her way, waving at Krishna and staring at me with bright, open faces of so many colors I thought I was seeing the world through tinted glasses.

"Why is it so warm here?" I asked her as we walked through the city—which seemed bigger and bigger every second—at a slow lumber. Five other riders followed after, talking to people on the street as they passed. The riders seemed to be a beloved set of people, garnering much attention from the other Sisters.

She looked down at me in surprise. "Did you not see when you arrived?" she asked.

I shook my head. "I was sick and asleep."

"Oh." She kept her eyes trained ahead as she spoke. "This city is on an island, and the lake around it boils from underground volcanic vents. Water bubbles up and keeps the ground warm." A smirk made her wide lips twitch. "No one can cross the boiling lake without one of our mounts. It is a solid defense that has proven its worth time and time again."

I couldn't help but be impressed. "That's so neat!" I said, and she smiled at me for a second before looking at the road again. We had reached the outskirts of the town at that point; fewer buildings hemmed us in, and there were fewer pedestrians to watch out for. The sky was easier to see, too—all blank greys and dark clouds. I couldn't see any sort of sun.

"You are easy to please, I'm thinking," she said, and she opened her mouth to go on before closing it with a snap. Her arms jerked on either side of me and the squirrel scrambled to a stop. Krishna's mouth hardened into a thin line.

"Hogosha," she said.

To say 'I froze' would be an understatement.

I went freaking _rigor mortise_.

"Hello, Krishna," said a familiar voice, and I slowly turned my head.

Before us, in the middle of the stone-paved road, stood none other than Ryu's right hand woman.

"Is that her?" Hogosha said in that musical voice of hers, and she tossed her white hair with a smirk. "Tiny thing. Everyone's talking about her."

Blue eyes glittered like gems in dark humor. I had forgotten just how pretty she was with her perfect face and plain white clothes, but she was so small among the other women—a mere seven feet to their tens and twelves—that she lost much of her imposingness. I felt myself breathe easier as we stared her down, silent until Krishna could take no more of the smaller woman's superior smirk.

Behind, the other riders began to hiss, a clear warning to back off, stay away, get out.

"Go back to your _master_, freak," Krishna spat, and with a twist of the reins she directed her squirrel around the woman at a bouncing trot.

Hogosha's face was below the level of mine since I was atop the squirrel, but that didn't stop her from staring at me through narrowed eyes as we passed. I snuck fitful glances at her face, but she showed no signs of recognizing me even though we made eye contact more than once.

"Who… was that?" I asked when we got far enough away. My heart hammered loud in my chest as I said: "Her hair was _white_!"

Krishna's scowl didn't falter. "She is a half-breed freak with no mind for tradition," the Sister growled. Her hands tightened on the squirrel's reins. "We welcomed her _despite_ her tainted blood, but she rejected everything we taught for a damned _man_!" Her scowl tipped down to me. "That is all you need know right now. Speaking of this makes my stomach sicken."

I looked forward instead of asking another question, feeling calmer now that the threat had passed. The road had vanished, putting us on dirt that gave way to mud after a little while, and then the water came into view.

The water, true to Krishna's word, hissed and bubbled and spit like a whistling kettle. Steam billowed off the pale green lake in great gouts of vapor, frothing up in rapids made through nothing but underground fire. The shore was muddy and ringed with rocks, and as I stared out over the lake, I thought I saw…

"Your men are on a small island out _there_," Krishna said, pointing to a dark outline standing low amidst the steam. "It's vacant save for yourselves. We do not tolerate men wandering the main island; they are forbidden there without a Sister to take responsibility. Our own men are on another island such as yours, but on the other side of the city." She threw up a hand, pointed to the left, and directed her squirrel in that direction. "We shall take you to your island now."

We walked along the shoreline for a good five minutes, picking our way over boulders and rocks with the scratch of many oversized talons to mark our way. The beach got rockier and rockier the longer we walked, and soon we came to a huge boulder at _least_ five stories high. Around it were smaller boulders that the other riders climbed as if they were nothing more than speed bumps.

"Hold on to me," said Krishna, and she wrapped one arm around my waist as she guided her mount straight up the big rock's vertical surface. I was forced to lay against her chest, clinging to her in fear of falling, but soon we managed to reach the boulder's top without mishap. "Do not scream," she instructed, and I bit back a cry when our mount sprang off the top of the rock with a coil of its back legs. My eyes squeezed shut and I was _certain_ Krishna had just flown us straight into the boiling lake, but then I heard a _snapping_ sound and we rushed upward so fast it felt like my stomach got left behind. Warm wind breezed into my face as I braced for the shock of boiling water, and...

_And why aren't we falling?_

"Look," Krishna instructed, and so I did.

The squirrels, you should know, are of the flying variety.

Cool , right? RIGHT. They have thick flaps of skin connecting their front legs to their back ones, allowing them to use the natural updrafts created by the lake's steam to glide out over the boiling water with ease. It's pretty damn neat, though more than a little scary to not know what's happening before you jump to certain death.

"It takes skill to do this," Krishna said above the wind rushing by. I felt beads of hot water form on my skin and hair, weighing the strands down onto my neck and chest. "There are stronger eddies that will carry us far; missing them can send you crashing to the water." My robe gaped open at the throat, and with shaking fingers I wrenched it shut. Krishna sounded proud of herself. "Are you impressed?"

"Very," I said.

"This time, you are right to be impressed." Her eyes squinted into the steam. "There it is. We will descend now." Her mount dipped accordingly, and she snapped the reins and said: "Ha!"

I don't know how she picked the island out of the obscure mess below us, but as we glided down to it I saw that it was probably a football field long and just as wide. In the center of it was a dome not unlike the one I had met the Grand Mother in, made of wooden poles stretched over with hide and canvas. Next to it was a stone structure I couldn't quite figure out, and next to that was a rock twin to the one Krishna had made her squirrel jump off of. She did not aim for that, however, choosing instead to alight on the shore by the boiling water. The squirrel skidded so hard I nearly bit my tongue, but I hardly noticed because the others were landing behind us, trying not to dog-pile each other with giggles and laughs and more than a few curses between them.

I shivered as I watched them land. Weirdly, this little island was much chillier than the big one.

"They're young fliers," Krishna said, with affection. "They'll learn in time." Then she barked: "Fall in!"

The women formed a line in an instant, and when they did I saw Karla slip off of one of the squirrels. She had a large crate in her arms, one which didn't appear to give her any trouble even though it was big enough for me to lie down in without complaint.

"I will take her up to them," Karla said. "Just let me take the supplies up, first."

"Understood," Krishna said, and we watched in silence as Karla walked away with long, even steps. She set the box down by the building and loped back in our direction, stopping by Krishna's squirrel so she could hold out her arms to me. I slid off the squirrel's back with an oomph, and as I got settled in the healer's grip I looked up at Krishna with a smile.

"Thank you," I said, and she tossed her rooster-crown hair.

"I will see you again," she said as Karla turned us away, and we began to walk.

"I put a salve for your foot and a tea for your throat in the supply box," she said, steps brushing light and even over the gravelly ground. "There is food and clothing as well. Your men possess your cane and pack." I heard her hesitate before I craned my head up to see her face. Her expression was guarded, but morose. "I attempted to heal your limp," she said stiffly. "I failed."

"I've always had that," I said, trying to soothe her. _Why does this woman remind me a little of Yukina?_ "Don't worry."

"Why don't you just shapeshift it away?" she asked as we approached the house. The words seemed to burst from her, like she'd been holding them in for ages and they finally boiled over.

I sighed as we followed the curve of the sloping brown walls. "I can't. No matter how hard I try, I just can't."

"I see," said Karla as we came to stop before a small square door. Wooden hinges on one side and a leather strap on the other would allow a person of my size to open it, but Karl was obviously far too big to fit through the tiny hatch. She carefully set me on my good foot, making sure I was able to stand before she backed away.

"Put the salve on your wounds after baths," she instructed. "Keep it wrapped tight, too. Drink the tea with every meal and every time you feel your throat becoming irritated. There are pills in the box as well, ones to keep your fever and cough from returning." She paused, thinking about it. "Take one with every meal, and I believe that that is all. Please be careful of your health from now on."

For all her size, she certainly was a worrier. "Thank you for your kindness, Sister," I said, bowing, and she bowed back. Then, however, her cheeks blushed with a smear of darker green.

"Um," she said, turning to go. "There is a larger door for Sisters to use on the other side. I will take the crate through there. But…"

Wary, I asked: "But?"

"Sarka wanted me to say that if you ever would let her see if _things_ _matched_, she'd be waiting," Karla blurted.

I stared at her. She stared back, expectant.

_Was I,_ I thought dumbly, _just propositioned for sex… by a giantess?_

She turned apologetic when I made no answer. "I didn't want to say it, but Sarka is—"

"Persistent?" I managed to say in a hollow voice, and Karla smiled shyly.

"As am I," she said, and with another smile that left me utterly confused she explained: "You're a bit of a novelty, Elaina. Your size and coloring are… exotic to us." She turned away. "You will garner much attention here, as we have not had an outsider in many years. Anyway. Please go inside and meet your men. I will see you at the Hunt."

"See you," I said on auto-pilot, and I watched her go without a single thought going through my head. My fingers were wooden as I grabbed the door's leather handle, and with a ginger tug I pulled it open. It was dark and quiet inside, so with a deep breath I used the doorframe for support and let myself go through.

Inside was basically a repeat of the room I woke up in. Poles stretched across the ceiling to support it, a massive mound of furs and skins took up a good portion of the floor, and a pit in the center housed that smokeless fire the Sisters seemed so fond of. It was pretty dark, though, and so the boys—who were all standing around the fire watching the big door on the house's other side the way foxes watch henhouses—didn't notice when I quietly shut the door behind my back.

I got inside just as Karla opened the massive door across the way, and that made all the boys tense up. "I _told_ you I felt someone outside," I heard Kuwabara say as I leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed below my breasts as I watched them. They all looked fine unhurt to me, a sight that made stress I didn't know I was feeling melt out of my shoulders and neck. I sighed, slumping against the door with a smile.

_They're OK,_ I thought. _Thank God._

Karla, silhouetted in the grey light of the outside, took one step into the room and set the wooden crate down just inside the door, and to my surprise she actually sneered in the guys' direction. Then, however, her eyes found me standing behind them. Her smile was a warm one that melted the minute Yusuke took a step toward her and the box, and she bared her teeth at him before wheeling around and leaving the room in a thunder of massive feet. The big hatch closed behind her with the sound of wood on wood.

Kurama, ever the smartest one, followed the wake of the woman's smile because he knew it actually meant something. When he saw me his eyes widened, then narrowed, and he turned full around and held his hands up in front of him.

"Dani?" he asked, uncertain when he saw my shifted face, and I grinned.

"The one and only," I said as the rest of them spun, too. "'Sup, guys?"

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Happy birthday to my friend Kirrby! ^^_

_Longest chapter yet? You can bet your britches that this is._

_I SOMEHOW managed to reply to most of last chapter's reviews… earlier this afternoon. Better late than never? Eh heh heh…_

_The Sisters are all lesbians. Spoiler alert._

_And then there was Hogosha. PEACHY._

_I love peanutbutter._

_Next week we get to see something interesting. THE BOYS LEARN THAT THEY'RE DANI'S… well, property. Lots of inferences are made. Dani makes sense of everything she played along with tonight, next chapter._

_Not much else to say this week. Flying Squirrels FTW!_

_Thanks SO MUCH, reviewers and favers and alerters! You guys are all rockstars and consistently make my day much better. Last chapter was the highest reviewed chapter I've ever had, actually, which made the addition of giant blue ladies and flying squirrels the size of minivans seem quite smart in retrospect. I wasn't sure anyone would like them at all! Kai-Chan94, Inferno, dumbrat, 9shadowcat9, ichixichigo, Reclun, Dragon of Twilight, colbub, etowa-ru, DevilAngelWolf27, SillyGoddessDisco, White Rose Fox, Koryu Elric, Misuzu-PM, Kaiya's Watergarden, Foxgirl Ray, destinyswindow, HitsugayaFanGirl, American Senpai, masuyo shun (you sent three of the same review, by the way—I think FFnet glitched! XD), XAudraRoseX, ovenfreshh, chocolateluvr13, TallyYoungBlood, Willowleaf2560, Otaku Wench, MusicFiend666, j.d.y., Wolf-Cry-Night, Mihakaku, loser94, archangel fighter, DaAmazingMeepers, TheKingsOwn, sweetyjg, DarlingSM, LadyoftheGags, rain chant, AkaMizu-chan, dude where's my spirit gun, AlyssHeart71, Katt Jeane, 0nfateswings, ShadowFireFox13, yuki san 1, and OhhTaylorJade!_


	43. Chapter 43: Honest Mistake

Future Talk

Chapter 43:

"Honest Mistake"

* * *

Kuwabara and Kurama seemed wary of me, standing with tense expressions aimed my way, but that was all. They didn't look scared, murderous, or shocked—both had seen my chosen face in the woods, of course, and they knew that my bright blonde hair and cornflower eyes were products of a shapeshift. I could tell they weren't quite used to the changes just yet, but they weren't ready to point fingers and shout 'Imposter!' at me, either. Willing to accept any curveballs aimed in their direction; good old Kuwabara and Kurama, right?

Yusuke and Hiei, however, were a different story.

"Hate to break it to ya, girlie, but Dani ain't a blonde," Yusuke said as he took a step past the others. He raised a finger at me, pointing in a way that could turn into the Spirit Gun pose at any moment. "So if you're trying to get in with us, you're doing a lame job."

Kuwabara moved after him and grabbed his wrist, dragging the accusatory hand down to Yusuke's side. "It's _her_, ya dummy," he said. "Can't you feel it?"

"I can't feel anything but the scents of those damned _women_ clinging to her," Hiei snapped. He did not move from his place at the fire's side, but his eyes—bloody and glinting with a mix of emotions I couldn't quite articulate—roved over my face, hair, and bound-up foot with jagged darts of heat. I frowned at him, bending to sniff at my shoulder, but all I smelled was cloth and sweat. I needed a bath, yes, but it wasn't like I reeked…

"I don't smell anything," I said.

"It's difficult for one to smell one's self," Kurama chimed in softly. His eyes, like Hiei's, did not leave me, but unlike Hiei he did not seem pissed. "But yes, this is Dani. She took on this guise moments before the warriors took her away." Red hair framed his face when he titled his head to the side. "Although why she is keeping it now is a little… suspicious."

I shrugged. "You never know who's watching."

"No one, at the moment," Kurama said. "They have no need to guard us when we're as trapped as we are."

He had a point. "Touché," I said. I raised my hands to my face, covering it, and with a snap and a burst of willpower I put my face back where it belonged. Kuwabara's jaw dropped when I let my hands fall, smiled brightly, and said: "Better?"

"Whose face _was_ that?" Yusuke asked, but I just put a finger to my lips.

"A magician never reveals her secrets," I said. My humor dimmed when I added: "I have _so_ much to tell you guys. Seriously. It's kind of obnoxious." I tried to take a step forward on my good leg. My knee, however, did not like this and decided to buckle like cooked spaghetti. I would have fallen had I not managed to grab the doorframe, fingers curling around wooden poles like they were lifelines.

"Dani?" I heard Kuwabara say as I cursed, and when I looked up I saw that he had come quite close with his hands outstretched.

"Leg's weak," I grunted, getting my feet under me again. I pushed my still-bright hair out of my face with the heel of my hand. "Wanna toss me my cane?"

It came flying out of the gloom a millisecond later; Kuwabara barely caught it, and as he handed it to me I saw Hiei standing by the pile of backpacks I hadn't yet noticed. His arm was still hovering in the air, eyes lingering on my foot as rough fingers curled into a fist.

"They healed you?" he asked, incredulous, and he gave a cruel laugh as he tossed his head. "Ha! _Tried_, more like it. Your voice is certainly raw enough."

That stung; the Sisters had been more than good to me. "At least I'm not coughing up my lungs anymore," I said in protest. "And for the record, Sioh's _poison_ gave me the cough, not the air."

"_Whose_ poison?" said Yusuke.

"Sioh—the river monster."

"That _thing_ has a _name_?" said Kuwabara, raising his eyebrows so high they almost disappeared into his hairline.

"That's what I said when they told me," I said. I looked to Kurama again. "Sioh's cough is all mucus-y and gross, just like the one I had. They cured it so I'm OK now, just hoarse." A grimace made me bare my teeth. "No singing for a few weeks, which sucks but I think I can deal with it."

"Yeah—you sound like shit," Yusuke agreed, and I dropped my hands with a bald stare in his direction.

"Gee, that makes me feel so _good_ about myself," I said, and I gingerly stepped forward. I put no weight at all on my wrapped-up foot, using my cane as a rather rickety crutch as I kept my foot a good six inches off the ground. Kurama moved aside as I very, very slowly made my way toward the fire; I was a bit chilly and it seemed like the best idea at that point, so I bee-lined for it. That entailed walking past Hiei, however, and I couldn't help but give a furtive glance at him when I neared.

He was staring at me, but I was expecting that. What I wasn't expecting was the attitude in his gaze—he was unhappy about something, nose wrinkled from his scowl and with darkness hovering behind his eyes. Speaking of which, when our eyes locked they froze me solid, and then he said: "That hair doesn't suit you."

I didn't respond with words. I just stopped walking, raised my hands, threaded them close against my scalp, and closed my eyes. With a burst of concentration I tugged my fingers down through the strands, brown staining my hair in streaks wherever my skin passed through.

"So sorry to displease you," I said with sarcasm dripping from every syllable, and with an 'umph' I sat by the fire. I ignored the fire demon despite the fact that I was practically sitting at his feet, with my own feet stretched out toward the flames. The volleyball of bandages around my left one had begun to itch, so I scratched it through the wrappings with the butt of my cane. Over my shoulder, I called: "You guys wanna come sit down?"

The others moved in close, sitting in a semi-circle at my back (they, apparently, didn't want to get closer to the fire). I spun around to face them, spine loosening as the fire warmed it up.

"Should I start, or do you want to go first?" I asked offhandedly, still scratching. I looked up to find all of them staring at me. "What?" I asked, glancing between each of them in turn.

"You're awfully chill about this," Kuwabara said. "I mean, we've been worried sick about you."

_They were?_ I frowned. "How long have I been gone?"

"They took you away yesterday morning," Hiei said, and I jumped when he sat down to my left. "They took us here soon after and wouldn't tell us anything." His face seemed stuck in glare-mode.

Yusuke said: "Yeah, and they all spoke American! It was so annoying!"

"They spoke a little Japanese, too, Yusuke," Kurama said in a gentle voice. He looked at me, eyes soft but questioning. "Though they only spoke a broken version of it when absolutely necessary, and when they used it they looked like they were speaking to bugs. Perchance you know why, Dani?"

"I think I do," I said with a nervous swallow. _Here's where it gets ugly,_ ran my thoughts about that, and I absently scratched at my foot with my cane as I regarded my lap with a furrowed brow. Hair fell into my face when I looked up, and as I impatiently brushed it away I glanced at Hiei, who was sitting nearest the backpacks. "Would you mind handing me my stuff?" I asked, and he glared before swiping it off the ground and all but throwing it into my lap. I decided not to comment as I dug in, found the metal ring holding all my hair ties, and took two off so I could slip them over my wrist. With deft fingers I began to pull my hair into loose pigtails.

As I worked, I said: "Before I get into everything, can you tell me how they treated you?"

"How'd they…?" Yusuke grumbled in disbelief. He threw up his hands with a frustrated sigh. "They snarled at us, smacked spears over our heads, and basically tried everything they could to humiliate us!"

But Kuwabara shook his head. "The one that hit me was nice, though," he said, and he gave me a smile as he combed a bit of his hair back. That's when I noticed a fading scab on his temple, a scab placed right over the place a Sister had struck him back in that long-ago clearing. Kuwabara said: "She apologized for hitting me and even gave me some salve for my wounds—they're not all bad!"

I processed this, and Kurama said: "You look confused, Dani."

"I am," I said, and I took a deep breath. "You guys aren't gonna like any of this," I said, feeling more self-conscious by the second.

"Why not?" Hiei snapped. I huffed.

"Because you're just _not_," I said, and I put a hand over my face. "And now I don't know where to start. Peachy."

"Let me take care of that," Kurama said in a dry voice. "In the clearing, you spoke to the leader in your language. What were you discussing?"

I couldn't help the blush that colored my cheeks. "Um…"

"Dani?" Kuwabara said.

"She _kind_ _of_ thought you all were carrying me off for some nefarious purpose or another," I said, tone measured and even as I tried not to sound as nervous I really was. "That's why they attacked in the first place. To… defend me." I couldn't look anywhere but at my own lap and the crinkled tan fabric stretched over it.

"Defend you? They don't even know you!" Yusuke said.

"To them it's more a matter of principle than knowing someone," I muttered, and I tugged on a piece of hair that had escaped from my pigtails, twining it round and round my finger until my scalp burned. "It's because I'm a girl. That's all. No other reason besides me being a _girl_."

"But… why would they risk their lives for another girl they don't even know?" Kuwabara asked. "That just doesn't make any sense!"

I hesitated. "It does if you know them," I said, timid. "They're… um…"

"We're talking about what you said in the clearing, Dani," Kurama reminded me.

I looked at him, lips pressed tight together as I saw his calculating eyes. "It sort of ties in with what Kuwabara was saying," I said.

"_What_ does?" he asked.

"Well," I wheedled, "the leader lady started asking me a, um, question, over and over again until I gave her an answer, and I said 'yes' since that seemed like the right choice, and now they all think…" I blushed again, putting my face in my hands so I could turn the color of a beet in private. "Dear sweet Thomas Edison, this isn't happening."

"To-mo-su who?" Kuwabara asked as Kurama said: "_What_ isn't happening?"

"Yes, _do_ tell us!" Yusuke said, eyes rolling. "Because we're not totally waiting on you or anything!"

"It's just so _awkward_, though!" I protested, and when everyone except Kuwabara glared at me (he was the only one to offer me an encouraging smile, bless him), I steeled myself for their reaction. "They think I _own_ you!" I hastily bit out, and I covered my face with my hands again so I didn't have to face the music. "See how awkward that is! The stupid leader lady kept saying 'Are they yours? Are they yours?' and I was delirious and confused so I just said 'yes' and now they think all of you are my _property_!"

Silence. Then:

"Wait," Yusuke said. "Wait. WHAT?"

I threw my hands down so I could stare at all of them, embarrassment turning into misplaced fury when I saw their shocked—bordering on disgusted—expressions. What, was it such a horrible idea to think of me like that? Was it? Here I was, having all the trouble in the world processing this on my own, and they had the nerve to give me that _look_?

"Don't look at me that way!" I snapped. "It was an honest mistake, and what were they _supposed_ to think? I'm travelling with a bunch of guys who start trying to _kill_ people in order to _protect_ me, and _then_ I started speaking the language only members of their _cult_ know how to speak, and then I make the mistake of accidentally _claiming_ all of you, and since I did an extra-special-good-job of playing along with their little rituals they now think I'm some sort of weird harem-having _disciple_ of the local _goddess_!" Hands fisted in the fabric of my robe. "And apparently I remind them of one of their old shapeshifter friends and they think I'm her long-lost daughter and we have to make a fucking _pilgrimage_ to see the Bright Lady—"

"The… who?" Kurama managed to say in a hollow voice.

I realized I had let the phrase slip out in English. "The… Lady… of… Brightness?" I puzzled out in Japanese, translating the name on the fly. The analytical thought made some of my anger cool. "I don't know quite what she is, only that the Sisters—"

"The who?"

"The, er, _kyoudai_?" I said, once more not quite knowing how to say it. "I mean, 'kyoudai' could mean 'brothers and sisters' _or_ 'siblings,' but in this case it's an all-feminine type of siblings." I scratched at the back of my neck, nails digging into my skin a little harder than they should have. "English isn't easy to translate into Japanese. Some words are too specific."

"I think I understand," Kurama said, recovering from his shock more quickly than the others (all of whom still looked stricken). "We'll just refer to them as the 'kyoudai' for now. But I have to ask—how many of these Sisters are there, exactly?"

My mouth opened to reply, but I realized that I had to think about that issue, too. "I didn't think to ask," I finally said. "They live on a big island across the lake in a stone town—"

"I was wondering where they had taken you," Kurama muttered.

I went on: "—and there were a couple hundred of them, at least. Maybe more."

Kuwabara paled.

"And these women," Kurama summarized in a tone that suggested he wasn't quite ready to believe the words about to come out of his own mouth, "live in a matriarchal society where men are viewed as… less valuable than women?"

"Pretty much," I said.

"So they defended you, a woman, because you are their kin and the Bright Lady—their deity, I assume—teaches that women are the superior specie?" he said.

"Pretty much," I repeated.

"And since you speak their language, they assume you are a follower of hers as well, since only her followers speak as such?"

A third time: "Pretty much."

"And since you showed ownership of males, as the Lady dictates, and you speak the language, as the Lady dictates, and you are a woman, as the Lady loves, you are therefore a friend to them." A small smile made his lips full curl and his green eyes narrow. "This makes sense."

"It… it does?" Yusuke said, ashy-faced.

"Yes, Yusuke," Kurama said. "They only spoke to us when necessary because they do not believe we are worthy of their attention otherwise, and they treat Dani with kindness because she is their religious sister." He chuckled. "No pun intended, of course."

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Oh, ha ha."

"And the Grand Mother even complimented me when she was told that none of you spoke English," I said. "She said it was good of me to keep the language holy. I apparently followed a lot of their rules on accident."

"The what complimented you?" Kurama said, face darkening.

"Oh, um, the leader of the Sisters, I had a long talk with her before I came here." I shook my head from side to side, internally berating myself for dropping so many terms in English. I was slipping back into it now that I had others to chat with. "The Grand Mother is the… 'obaasan'?" I suggested, but I raised a hand to quiet anyone before they spoke. "That isn't right. In English, 'grandmother' is the same things 'obaasan,' but they were saying 'Grand Mother', which is more like… a mother who is grand, or a mother of grandness, or something." I shook my head to clear it. "But she's the oldest one around, which would make 'obaasan' make sense, too, I guess."

"I see," Kurama murmured, staring down at his folded hands.

"So… you basically said that you were our… well, mistress," Kuwabara said, changing the subject with cheeks growing red, "so that they wouldn't kill us for allegedly abducting you?"

My breath shuddered in my chest. "Pretty much," I said yet again.

Kuwabara studied me for a moment, and then he grinned. "Way to go, Dani!" he said, clapping a hand down on my good foot in congratulations. "You saved our butts!"

Yusuke gave him a look that suggested his friend had gone off the deep end. "What are you, crazy? She _owns_ us now! Doesn't that bother you?"

Kuwabara looked offended. "Dani wouldn't have said something like that if it wasn't necessary," he said, "and I know she's not going to abuse this situation." He shot me a pleading look. "Right, Dani?"

"That's Dani-_san_ to you, bub," I deadpanned, and when his jaw dropped I giggled. "Kidding!"

This time it was Yusuke's turn to hide his face in a hand. "Oh man," he moaned, "if Keiko finds out about this place, she'll want to _immigrate_." His hand dropped as his face drew in on itself. "Wait. Are men even allowed here normally?"

"They told me that men aren't allowed on the main island without someone to 'take responsibility' for them," I said. "They also said that they keep some other guys on an island like this one. So yeah, I guess men are OK, but they don't have the same rights as girls do."

"They're probably kept for breeding purposes," Kurama said in a low voice, and the air instantly became more awkward.

"Most of the Sisters are gay," I said, trying to be helpful, and the room went silent as everyone looked at me. Even Hiei looked up when he heard that one, and in his expression lurked something a little more menacing than the others…

"How'd you figure that one out?" Kuwabara said, face crimson as he fidgeted, and I had to suppress a wry smile.

"Let's just say that if I ever decide to try batting for the other team," I said, "I won't have any issues finding… players." I smiled brightly. "Blondes really do have more fun!"

Kurama looked stricken. "You _didn't_…?" he began, but I shook my head.

"Nope. But I got a few offers and… inquiries." I frowned. "I dunno how the whole process would work, seeing as how most of the Sisters are over twice my size, but…" I shrugged. "Being short is what's so attractive to them, or so I was told. Being fun-sized actually pays off on this continent."

"Fun sized?" Kuwabara quoted, horrified.

"FUN SIZED?" Yusuke quoted in an even louder voice. His face, however, held less horror and more amusement. "You mean like those tiny candies they sell in bulk?"

"It's a euphemism for being short, too," I said in my defense.

"Wow. Cool," said Yusuke, and everyone gave him a look that said he was pushing it.

"So, um, Ryu's here," I said to cover the tense silence.

Yusuke scoffed. "We knew that." He held out his wrist, upon which there was his tracker watch. Its hand spun in quick circles, an endless loop of dizzy confusion. "See? He's close."

"Did you actually see him?" Hiei snapped, and I jumped. I had forgotten he was sitting next to me since he hadn't spoken in a while.

"No," I said, noting that Hiei wasn't looking at me (his boots had become quite interesting, it seemed), "but I did see Hogosha. She's an outcast, as far as I can tell. I think it's kind of because of her heritage, but one of the Sisters told her that she should go back her 'master,' which makes me think the race issue isn't nearly as damning as her life choices."

"Did she recognize you?" Kurama asked, suspecting the worst, and I shook my head.

"We got close, but she didn't act like she knew me." I gestured at my head. "The face is what threw her off, I think. I'll put it back on next time I go out."

"Who's face _was_ that?" Yusuke asked. "You wouldn't tell me earlier."

I didn't reply right away, poking at my foot with my cane as I thought about it. "It's my mother's," I said at last, and when I looked up I could see that my words were more than enough to garner a host of pitying looks (from everyone but Hiei). It took a minute to remember that she was, for all points and purposes, _dead_, and then their looks made sense.

"I thought it resembled your own face somewhat," Kurama said. His eyes glittered. "But different in parts, and older."

I looked down at my foot again. "I have her eye's shape," I said, "and her mouth, and her cheeks. But I have my dad's nose and jaw and forehead, and I have his coloring, too. Still, that's probably what I'll look like when I get older, minus the blonde hair." A laugh made my stomach turn. "She dyed it a lot as she got older. She was always vain about her hair." I grimaced. "Speaking of which, I need to wash mine. We don't happen to have baths here, do we?"

Kuwabara looked like Christmas had come early. "Ooh, ooh, I wanna show her!" he said, hopping to his feet. He grabbed my backpack out of my lap and held out a hand, pulling me to my feet and then toward the door Karla had gone out of earlier. "It's really cool, Dani, you have to see this!"

"Wait!" Kurama called after us, and we stopped to turn and stare. "We're not done here."

"Why not?" I asked. "I need a bath because I stink—Hiei said so."

The fire demon's face darkened at me, but I just tossed my hair and looked away. He could deal with it however he wanted to…

"We need to decide if we are going to continue to play along with these people," Kurama said.

"Well, duh, we are," I retorted. I took a half-hopping step back toward the fire. Kurama started to talk, but I was intent on my bath and interrupted him. "In two days all the Sisters are going on a Hunt thing, and then they're going to see the Bright Lady to pay her tribute."

"Hunt?" said Yusuke. He looked alarmed, but also a little excited. "What are we hunting? And why?"

I shrugged. "I don't know much about it. Apparently we hunt, have a feast, and sing kum-by-freaking-yah around the campfire." I put hand on my hip. "They told me to get all of you guys ready for the Hunt, so apparently you're going to have to come along. And if you're coming along, it stands to reason that most of the other men will have to, too. And since Ryu's here and since Ryu's a guy, he'll be there."

"And we might have an opportunity to get him in close quarters," Kurama said, but he scowled. "A good start to a plan, of course, but we have no other details with which to work."

I raised a finger and wagged it at him. "We're forgetting something—I'm popular. I'm sure I can squeeze some information out of the Sisters tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" said Hiei.

I looked at Kurama when I answered. "Yeah. The Grand Mother was impressed by the song I played for her—"

I heard a snap; Hiei had sat up straighter with bright red eyes narrowed into slits. "You played a song for her?" he said in a low voice.

"Holy—" I sighed, running my hands through my hair. "I forgot. After I woke up I basically got interrogated by the Sisters' high council, and I pretended to know who the Bright Lady was and all that stuff. Thought it would keep me out of trouble, you know? Only I didn't bring tribute for the Bright Lady, which I was supposed to do—"

"How did you get out of that one?" Yusuke asked with a laugh. "Dummy!"

I tossed my head with a reply of: "You're exactly right—I played dumb. I said that my mother, the shapeshifter they think I'm related to, died before she could teach me everything about the Bright Lady and the Sisters, and that I wanted to visit the Sisters to fill in the gaps in my training." I took a deep breath before going on. "I ended up saying that I brought music as my tribute, and since I know a bunch of songs in their language they were happy with that. Actually, they were so happy that they made me promise that I'd go back to their city tomorrow to show their musicians some of the songs I know."

"So tomorrow you can fish for information without being suspected on the grounds that you have incomplete schooling," Kurama said, but he said it more to himself than anyone in the house. "I see… we can work with this." He looked back up at me with a flash of green. "I will think of things for you to find out while you bathe. Take your time. I know you must be tired."

I smiled at him. "Thanks." I glanced at everyone. "Sorry I'm so snippy, guys. It's been a long past couple of day."

"And tomorrow?" Hiei said.

I frowned at him. "What about tomorrow?

"So you're going back into their city? On your own?" Hiei said. He was on his feet in a second. "I will not allow that."

"You won't _allow_ it?" I asked, incredulous as Hiei came to stand almost nose to nose with me. I tried not to feel too intimidated and used sarcasm to cover how much I was failing at doing so. "Oh, that's _right_, you're _totally_ the boss of me, Hiei! How could I forget?"

"We will not let you risk yourself again," Hiei growled, eyes flickering toward Kurama.

The fox demon slowly got to his feet. "Hiei, we need this information," he said with a touch of regret. "Dani must go back into the city."

"No," he said, fists balling up at his sides. "I won't let them take her again."

"You're forgetting that _I'm_ the owner here," I said, and when Hiei looked at me with an expression of such alien loathing on his face that I felt my skin crawl, I realized I had overstepped a line. But since there was no turning back, I kept going just like the idiot I am: "If I get detained by a man they'll lose respect for me and our cover will be blown."

"As uncomfortable as it seems," Kurama added, "we cannot stop Dani going to the other island. If the Sisters saw us disobeying her, all would be lost."

"It sucks, but we gotta deal," said Yusuke. He had lain down on the ground, limbs spread in all directions as his usually lazy nature rose to the surface.

"You forget, all of you!" Hiei snapped. "I am _no one's_ property." He faced me again, coming so close I could feel his body heat envelop me like a cloud. I stumbled back a step and nearly fell, but his hand closed over my wrist in a flash of hot, bone-grinding force. "I don't care what those blue idiots think," he snarled, "_I am not letting you go away from me on your own_!"

"You're hurting me!" I gasped, trying to wrench my arm out of his hand, but he held on tighter. "Hiei, STOP!"

"Don't think you can order me around, woman," he hissed, tugging me toward him. I started to fall forward, pitching toward his chest, but then an arm darted across my waist from behind and held me upright, my arm stretched between me and Hiei like a taut rope.

"Hiei, quit it!" Kuwabara said. He reached out over my shoulder and grabbed Hiei's collarbone, shoving him back a step that caused Hiei to let go. I cradled my hand to my chest as Kuwabara released me, took my arm in gentle fingers, and cast dark eyes down at my wrist. "Dude, why the heck are you getting this violent with Dani!"

Sure enough, when I looked down I could see the darkening outline of a hand on my skin. Looking at the bruise numbed me to the core.

_Did Hiei do that_? I thought, and my throat felt thick all of a sudden. I looked at Hiei's stunned face, trying to make it all make sense, and—

—and I was suddenly _furious_.

"The Sisters were right about you, Hiei!" I said, and my voice broke on the last syllable. "You do lack restraint!"

His shock shifted into annoyance, and that only made me angrier. "What is that supposed to mean?" he snapped.

My nails dug into my palm even as Kuwabara held it toward. "It means you tried killing one of the Sisters after I left, don't deny it because they told me that's what you did, and did you think for one _second_ that killing one of them could get all of _us_ killed, too?" I shouted. "I get that you feel like you have to protect me and everything, they even told me you were a great man for being so concerned, but sometimes I wish you'd put your stupid pride away for just a second and TRUST ME, you big JERK!"

Something wet dripped onto my bare chest; my robe had slipped open a few inches, and with shaking hands I touched my cheek.

My flesh came away wet.

"I think I'd like that bath now, Kuwabara," I said, staring at my glistening fingertips. I hadn't realized I'd been crying until then, and when I thought about it I couldn't figure out quite _why_ I was crying, either.

"Um, sure," he said, and he touched my shoulder so he could lead me away. I didn't look at Hiei, Kurama, or Yusuke when we walked toward a small door I hadn't yet seen, leaving them alone in a stunned silence I was not content to break.

I wondered, vaguely, if what I'd said meant anything to Hiei at all, or if it even made any sense.

* * *

The bathroom was less a room than it was a marvel of engineering. I'll try to explain it as best I can, though I'm sure I'll be able to do it justice.

The first thing you saw when you opened the door to the bathroom was a long rectangle of a room stretching about ninety feet wide and forty feet deep. The floor and walls were all made of stone, and the walls were all lined with small hollows of stone that one could put their things in. Two stone tables (one sized more to my height and one that was more befitting of a Sister) filled the space up, and there was a large wicker basket by the door holding rough beige towels of various sizes. It was a simple place, but the ceiling—made of loosely woven fibers and pieces of tanned hide—let in enough ambient light to see the dim world by.

"What's through there?" I asked Kuwabara when I regained my voice, pointing at a door (big enough for amazon) covered by a red curtain that lay down on the room's far right end.

"The toilets," he replied.

That gave me pause. "They have plumbing?"

"Kind of." He pointed straight across the room to a similar door. The curtain over that one, however, was blue. "That's where the cool stuff is. You're gonna love it."

And he was right—I did love it. I loved that bathing area more than any I had ever seen before.

Now let me tell you why.

You walked into it on a thirty-by-thirty foot platform of rippled stone. To both the right and the left were sets of curving stairs, big ones with smaller sets carved into the sides to allow both amazons and smaller visitors a way to get up or down. There was no roof; the yellow-grey sky above spat steam, making the air sticky and warm and as easy to breathe as soaked cotton. What drew my eye, however, were the actual baths: the two pools, one dug into the rock about forty feet above the other, were connected by the cascading ribbon of a silvery waterfall. The stairs to my right led down to the lower pool, which was about fifty feet or so wide, and the ones on my left led to the upper pool of a similar size. The thin and trickling sound of running water rent the air like a musical needle, and the whole place looked like something out of a fairy story. The air even had a misty, glowing quality to it that seemed like magic made into nothing more ordinary than water vapor.

"There're two springs in the upper pool," Kuwabara explained, excited. "One's freezing and one's hot, but you can close them up with a lid and adjust the temperature. It's really cool! And there's a vent in the lower pool so the water circulates and doesn't get dirty. You wash up in the bottom one and soak in the top—but do you need help getting up and down those stairs?"

Shocked out of my awed expression, I gave him a small smile. "I don't think so," I said.

"Cool." He handed me my backpack, which I put on my shoulders with a grunt. "Um. Dani?"

"Yeah?" I asked, preparing to descend the stairs to the lower pool.

"Hiei didn't mean it," he said. I froze, not looking at him, and he sounded sincere. "He wouldn't hurt you on purpose. It's just that… he was so worried about you, but you didn't seem worried about us at all."

"He was worried?"

The words slipped out before I could monitor them, but Kuwabara still replied: "Yeah. He wouldn't stop pacing. Normally he just sits somewhere and watches _us_ freak out, but last night and yesterday he looked like he was ready to rip someone's throat to bits if they said a word about you." The psychic paused, and I turned to look at him. His eyes seemed far away. "Hiei likes you, you know. He likes you a lot."

I turned toward the stairs, feeling my murmuring heart beat in a random pattern. "Yeah, well, I thought he was my friend before—" I covered, but Kuwabara interrupted me.

"Not like that," he said, and when I shot him a sharp look he breathed a sigh. Broad shoulders sagged, then straightened. "I dunno, Dani. He's not the type to show any sort of interest in people unless they actually mean something to him, and he's gone out of his way to show you some interest. Like when and after you got hurt, he tried so hard to…"

"To what?" I asked.

Kuwabara scratched the back of his neck, looking like he had said too much. "I dunno, Dani. That's his story to tell." His face turned pleading. "Just think about what I said, OK?"

"But what am I _supposed_ to think about it?" I asked, voice so low I could hardly hear my own words.

Kuwabara, however, had no trouble hearing them at all, and his expression turned into something unforgiving. I wasn't used to getting such a look from him, so I froze.

"You're confusing him," he said bluntly. "Sometimes you act like he's someone you really care for, and then there are times like earlier, when you yell at him and act like he's never done anything nice for you ever. Which he has. He's done more for you than you even know."

I froze.

_What?_

Kuwabara continued: "I know he'd kill me for telling you all of this, but that jerk is my friend and I can't help that I'm observant."

"Then _don't_ tell me, if he'd kill you," I breathed, but Kuwabara shook his head.

"He _likes_ you," he said, tone urgent. "I don't know why he would because sometimes you really are a bitch to him and I won't ask him for his reasons for forgiving you for that, but it's true. It's just that sometimes it's like you're leading him on, getting his hopes up that you're going to really open up to him, only to shut down and keep secrets as soon as someone gets passed your walls."

I swallowed before saying: "Walls?"

"You have a helluva lot of 'em, Dani," Kuwabara said. "So does he, and he probably has even more than you do. His life's been the shittiest I've ever heard of, and yours's been bad, too, so I guess he thinks you could understand him, but for all the strength he's so proud of, I think he's lonely. I think he thinks you could hide behind your walls together, if you'd only let each other in."

"Let _each_ _other_ in? He's never let _me_ in," I protested.

"Hasn't he?" Kuwabara asked.

I opened my mouth to reply, then closed it. A memory had cropped up. When Genkai had pushed me over that cliff, forcing me to sink or swim in the powers of my illusions, Hiei had come to me for support. He had sat by the fire I'd made, and when I said that I didn't want to let the fire go he had said…

_"I'm fire," he said, eyes on me as the flames caressed his skin. "Did you know that?"_

_I froze, but not because of the wind tossing my hair. "I didn't know," I said._

_"My father," Hiei said, and when he looked at the fire in his hand I found I could breathe again, "was a fire apparition."_

_The rarity of hearing about Hiei's heritage straight from him own lips struck me. I sat completely still, afraid the moment would break if I did something wrong, and Hiei kept speaking._

_"I never knew him," Hiei said. "My mother was an ice apparition. I hated her." He started looking at me again, red eyes huge and dark in the firelight. I couldn't see the color of his caramel skin in the darkness and his hair blended in with the sky, but I knew every line of him as he spoke. Hiei was not forgettable; not by any means. "I used to hate that part of myself, too. Her people are weak, spineless, cowardly and without honor. They tossed an infant off of a mountain simply because they did not understand it."_

_I murmured, "You."_

_Eyes that were hurt, defiant, and angry slipped over mine. "Yes. And when I felt the fire inside me, it beat back the cold of my mother's half." His next words were sardonic, and wry. I know more than you about the comfort of fire."_

_I tried to smile. "I don't know what to say."_

_"I don't want your pity," he snapped, and he closed his fist with a curl of powerful fingers. The fire went out in a burst of color and heat. "You of all people should know that."_

_My temper flared. "I didn't offer it," I said, and his brow twisted when I threw his words back in his face. "I __do__ know better than that. I know more than you about pity."_

_Perfect lips curled over straight white teeth._

_"I __do__," I said, protesting his silent disagreement. For some reason I found myself becoming angry. "And do you want to know why, Hiei? It's because you're stronger than me." I smirked at him, shifting my legs under me so I was kneeling amid the grass and darkened flowers. "I admit it. Go ahead and gloat. You are a million times stronger than I will ever, ever be, and because of that people don't pity you—they respect you, or at least fear you. But me? I'm this weak little girl with a bad body and very few brains to speak of. Music I can do, but everything else is pretty much beyond me, so yeah, I think I know pretty __damn__ well if you want to know the truth."_

_Hiei—who had been looking at me without expression the whole time—tilted his head to one side. The fire made his cheeks look lean and hollow. The look was a handsome one. "So you want," he said, "someone to protect you."_

Kuwabara's voice broke me out of my memory's grasp. "But my question is this," he said.

Our eyes met. I looked away first, staring at his shoes so I wouldn't have to look at him as he made me see lights I hadn't wanted to know were shining.

"How do you really feel about Hiei?" he asked. "You show him more emotion than anyone else around, but that emotion is not consistent. You're cruel to him."

The bottom fell out of my stomach.

_Me, cruel?_

But even as I wondered at it, I realized it was true.

"I don't mean to be that way," I whispered, hand tightening around my cane. "It's just… I can't…"

"Hiei deserves the explanation, not me," Kuwabara said, and he turned away. "I'm your friend, Dani. And friends don't let friends get away with the things you've been getting away with." He waved over his shoulder, hovering just before the curtained doorway. "If you like him the way I think you're denying that you do, then try to show him a little more understanding. He only acts like a jerk when he's worried."

A part of me—the part of me that was a detached fan-fic writer who liked keeping members of the canon cast away from the realms of OOC—recognized that fact as true, but the other part of me—the part that really knew him, the one that could relate his character to my own in ways the anime never could predict—resisted. He couldn't like me, he just couldn't, it was possible—

I started going down the stairs then, unable to face Kuwabara any longer, but after me he called: "And sometimes I feel like you go out of your way for him, too, Dani. Maybe you should also give the reasons for _that_ a little thought."

Even through the shock of everything, none of his words surprised me.

I think I'd whispered them to myself before, half asleep and halfway dreaming, when words were easy to ignore.

* * *

The pools really were cool to bathe in. It was like they had been smoothed out of the stone from years of the waterfall's erosion, which they probably had, and I felt tension drip out of my muscles as I scrubbed myself clean with bodywash and a cloth Botan had packed for me in my bag. A vent at the water's surface, true to Kuwabara's word, whisked the soapy suds away and out of sight, leaving the pool pristine. The waterfall itself worked as a showerhead, cleaning the shampoo and conditioner from my hair with hot streams of water that felt like heaven.

I kept my foot's bandages on even in the water, thinking I could change them once I got out of the bath for good, but they started itching after a few minutes of soaking and I had to unwrap it with shaking fingers. What I found surprised me: after cleaning off sticky brown goop (obviously the salve Karla had mentioned), I found that all of the pustules on my leg had faded into deep scab wounds, with no poison residue left to make them glow bright green. This pleased me, but I knew that Karla would insist on more salve so I made a mental note to reapply everything once I finished up.

When I was done bathing I wrapped myself in the robe the Sisters had given me and went to the upper pool to soak. The steps had small rivets carved into them to add traction, a feature for which I was vaguely grateful when my wet feet fought to find purchase on the rocks. I had to crawl up a few of them when it became too hard to walk on my over-sensitive leg, but I somehow managed to get into the upper pool without hurting myself.

The pools were shallow around the edges, but they were dark and deep in the middle, more like swimming pools than bathtubs. I avoided those parts, sticking to the stony lip of the pool like a clinging crab. I fiddled with the stone lids on the water vents for a bit, adjusting the temperature a bit hotter until everything felt just right.

Then, of course, I got bored.

_I really don't want to soak anymore_, I thought after ten minutes of it_. It's no fun by myself. _I sank into the water up to my nose._ But I really don't want to face Hiei just yet._

My hands drifted to my bad foot, and I began rubbing my foot's distended arch in soothing circles. Lauren and my mother had both always given me footrubs back home, and a pang of homesickness made me ache. I let go of my foot as if it had bitten me.

_If Hiei goes out of his way to do things for me_, I thought, remembering my talk with Kuwabara, _would he rub my feet if I asked?_ The resulting image made me giggle, but then it made me think of the way his mouth had curled around my leg to draw out Sioh's poison, and I stopped smiling abruptly. _Yuck. He really did go out of his way for me that time._

_That's pretty much the only time, though,_ I thought with satisfaction. _Kuwabara doesn't know what he's talking about._ I moved to sit on the lip of the pool, leaving only my feet in the water. _Oh yeah, and then there was that time he saved me from the Book and didn't tell anyone about it, but that's the only other thing he's…_

My brow furrowed.

_I almost forgot—what about that time he gave me the piano, even when Genaki said that I shouldn't get it? He gave it to me because I was crying and lonely. He felt sorry for me…_

_And that one time when he jumped up that tree to show me the landscape… I mean, he did do that after abandoning me for five hours, but…_

_Oh, and then right after that he watched the stars with me and listened to me babble about being homesick…_

My jaw dropped.

_And when he helped me use my tree-song, I couldn't have done anything without him then…_

_And when he let me get drunk in the hotel and tucked me in afterward! God, he never even made fun of me for that or anything! _

_Then there was that one time when he gave me a picture of my face so I didn't have to be a fish anymore, that sure was nice of him…_

I closed my mouth, put my face in my hands, and felt my cheeks begin to burn.

_Not to mention the time he told me he was going to be my protector right before he helped me use the tree-song…_

_And on that lovely note, he kept promising he'd take care of me and protect me when I was burning up with fever… _

_Then there was the time when he told me he wouldn't lose to Koenma… _

_Holy crap._

I couldn't stop flushing bright red, and with a splash I let my entire body sink under the water.

_He's always worrying after me even when he's insulting me, and I've been freaking oblivious. Fuck. FUCK. No wonder he gets so frustrated with me when I run off and put myself in danger. I don't even notice when he tries to get me out of it in the first place. It's like he takes up two steps forward and I just turn tail and bolt back in the opposite direction._

My lungs burned from lack of oxygen, but I didn't really care as I floated in warm and comforting stasis.

_And when I disobeyed him under water, I did that right after we had that fight over me being embarrassed about my body. Why was I so hung up over it anyway?_

The memory of that altercation rose up, unbidden and intense.

_"If you didn't care about what people think, you wouldn't be embarrassed," _he'd told me.

To which I'd blurted:_ "I'm only embarrassed because it's _you_!" _

Silence had hung heavy and stricken over the both of us, and then Hiei had begun to smile. I remembered that look and the way it made me shiver, the way his face had made me want to touch him and the way he had trailed his fingers down my shoulder in a whispering caress—

_"You don't care what _people_ think," _he'd said._ "You care what _I_ think." _A sinful smile. _"Isn't that interesting."_

_Oh wow, _I thought as the memory played itself out_. Oh wow. I told him that I liked him, and then—_

As soon as that thought was born, I gasped, drawing water into my lungs for one terrifying moment. I burst from the water, splashing about as I started clinging to the edge again and coughed up the liquid I had inadvertently swallowed down. The notion of _I told Hiei that I like him_ rang so true in my head that no part of me could deny it, no part of me could claim that the words we'd said—

_Holy shit_, ran my thoughts as my body wracked with spasms, _I freaking _like Hiei_!_

My chest felt hollow.

_And what's even worse is that I said it, then ignored his advice like he was a bug._

_I'm such a bitch!_

I ran my hands through my hair, cursing, and when I put my hand down I saw the red marks on my wrist. Hiei's hand was bigger than mine, and stronger, and he could have broken my wrist easier than I could break a stick of gum if he wanted to.

But he hadn't. He had never intentionally hurt me, not ever. Not even when I was vague and evasive and blockheaded and confusing and contradictory and…

_He grabbed me because he didn't want me to go, and force is the only thing he knows how to use_, I thought, staring at the mark that was getting more and more meaningful with every second. _He was only angry because I was so ready to abandon him, like the little bitch I am, when he's been fighting for me all this time… and I got mad at him for fighting the Sisters for me, but it was just an expression of care even if it was too violent to be recognizable as such…_

"Oh wow," I said, my voice carrying over the sound of the water like the croak of an overgrown frog. "Hiei and I might just be the single most awkward PDA givers in the history of _forever_."

And that thought, of course, made me wonder what people would say about the PDA between Koenma and I, if they knew the truth.

* * *

_NOTES:_

"_PDA" is the acronym for "public displays of affection." P-D-A. Not-O-K!_

_I updated early because I'm going out of town tomorrow night. _

_Title is a song by The Bravery of the same name. It's one of my favorites._

_The characters didn't get to talk about every last thing that happened with the Sisters. Those details will get worked in soon._

_This marks the fifth chapter in a row that has gone over 8,000 words, and it's the second in a row to go over 9,000 words. Good thing?_

_I think most of you thought that the boys would get mad at Dani's revelation, so I tried to turn it around by making Dani get angry. I think that dispelled the situation's volatile aspects somewhat. Had she been all gloat-y, I' m sure the boys wouldn't have been half so nice about it._

_This chapter wasn't as planned as the others—well, the first half was planned, but the conversation with Kuwabara happened on its own. At first I didn't like it and considered starting over. But now, after I've reread it and seen what it's going to do to the parts of the fic we haven't gotten to yet, I realize that it's exactly what was needed. _

_Just… trust me on this? _

_I just feel like Dani's been far too oblivious for far too long and that the realism has suffered because of it. Doubtless, people (particularly people like Kurama, Kuwabara, and Genkai) have noticed Dani and Hiei's emotional rollercoaster of fighting, hanging out, getting along, not getting along, feeling some level of sexual tension, Dani's crazy mood swings when she's around him, Hiei getting possessive and brutal… Dani _had_ to realize what was going on. Intervention just felt logical at this point. _

_So next chapter we get a good HieixDani moment that rides on the coattails of Dani's realizations. It's not going to be some crazy kissy moment, though. The two of them are NOT at that level, and they won't be for a while. Dani, as you will see, is way too embarrassed by her own feelings to confess them, and she's still confused over what she feels for Koenma, so…. I think you'll like it just the same._

_On another note, I've been sick all week. Yay, cold/flu/strep throat. It feels like a combo of all three, whatever it is. On top of that I have a huge story due Wednesday and a sculpture project due Tuesday, so if this chapter feels rushed it's because it kind of is. I kind of ask your mercy in regards to this. It's not my best, I know it's not, but right now I'm too freaking tired and busy to deal with a re-write._

_Anyway. I love you all. You are all awesome. You people consistently find ways to cheer me up, challenge me, and make me think each and every week. I love it. Sorry I didn't get around to answering all the reviews this time, but I promise I will for this chapter. You are ALL ROCKSTARS. OhhTaylorJade, Kai-Chan94, sweetyjg, dumbrat, DragonDancer93, etowa-ru, Dragon of Twilight, colbub, Kaiya's Watergarden, Koryu Elric, 9shadowcat9, LadyoftheGags, Reclun, DoilyRox, HeeHee01, Zetsubel ,NAO-chan33, Mihakaku, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., Hiei08, SillyGoddessDisco, MasuyoShun, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, loser94, archangel fighter, AkaMizu-chan, Otaku Wench, Ry171819, Angel of Randomosity, ichixichgo, rainchant, TallyYoungBlood, DaAmazingMeepers, Katt Jeane, Foxgirl Ray, Chasing Waterfallz, dude where's my spirit gun, XAudraRoseX, itsallaboutbob, Willowleaf2560, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Fuurai, Heart's Icy Touch, SupereBaka! _


	44. Chapter 44: Apologize

Future Talk

Chapter 44:

"Apologize"

* * *

I stormed out of the bath with my hair still dripping, jeans and a t-shirt thrown on so haphazardly it was a wonder I didn't wear them both backward. "Where's Hiei?" I snapped when I saw that he wasn't with the others, and everyone but Kuwabara looked confused at the question. The psychic, in contrast, just perked his metaphorical ears and smiled.

"He went out a few minutes ago," he said, pointing at the human-sized door I had used to come inside. To his non-nosy credit, he hesitated before asking: "So, did you…?"

"I thought about it," I grunted as I walked past the fire and tugged that door open. Before I left, however, I paused so I could look back. Yusuke had an eyebrow raised so high it blended in with his hairline, and Kurama…

—to my chagrin, he was smirking. When our eyes met his smirk widened into a grin, and I had to look away.

"Thanks," I said to Kuwabara, and he smiled.

"No problem," he said, and he shooed me out the door with his hand. "Go on; daylight's wasting. Lunch'll be ready when you get back."

"Make it good," I quipped.

"Does anyone want to tell me what's going on?" Yusuke was saying when the door fell shut behind me, but by then I was past the point of caring and I was slipping and sliding over the gravel ground, bare feet twitching when I remembered that I had forgotten to put on shoes. The small island was a bit chiller than the big one, but the steam from the boiling lake kept me from all but the gentlest of shivers.

I didn't see Hiei when I first walked out. The light shone grey and harsh onto the rocky earth and yellow-tinged lake, but I didn't see Hiei anywhere, even when I walked a dozen yards away from the wooden dome and turned back to look at it. The stone wall surrounding the bathing area stood much higher than the house itself, and next to that was the tall rock the squirrels could glide off of…

I stared up at that rock, squinting since it stood against bright-but-sullen grey sky, and was that a small smudge of shadow standing atop the rock or was it just…

My bad foot—with the uncovered lesions I hadn't taken the time to dress properly after my bath—stung and throbbed as I walked around the house, around the bathing area, and to the foot of the giant cigar-shaped rock. It took me almost fifteen minutes to get over there, but when I finally reached the base of it I cupped my hands round my mouth and tried to call Hiei's name.

All that came out was a croak, and with a frustrated growl I put my hand to my throat and cleared it. Then I tried calling his name again, and when I titled my face up to look at the rock—

I choked.

Not physically, of course—I choked mentally. I drew up the energy to call his name and stopped so I could stare upward with my pulse beating loud inside my neck. I tried calling his name three times and choked on each one, unable to make myself face him because suddenly I was nervous, so nervous I started to blush for no reason and I had to walk away from the rock without saying a word, head bowed as I bit my lip and tried not to scream in frustration. I had come out of the bath gung-ho about confronting him, telling him that I was sorry for the way I was and that I'd change, I promise I will, and—

I scurried away from the rock like a coward, not caring where I was going until I felt a blast of steam on my face and realized I was only a few meters away from the boiling lake. I backed up on reflex, the heat making the water hard to approach, but when I got too far away I realized that I was cold. It took a while to find the middle ground, and when I did I sat down and pulled my knees up to my chest so I could press my face into them.

_You're dumb, _I told myself._ You're dumb and you're stupid and you're scared and you shouldn't be. You just have a tiny crush on someone_—the thought made me blush harder—_and you think that this situation is engineered for maximum emotional bloodshed. Great—SO WHAT? If this wasn't hard it wouldn't be worth it. Get some confidence you big baby! Grow a pair and _talk to him_! You have to apologize! He'll hate you forever if you don't!_

But no matter how hard I berated myself, I didn't get up to go find Hiei.

Finally, after many minutes of not moving and internally yelling at myself, I lay out on the ground and tried to ignore all the little rocks that dug into my spine. My foot hurt, my head had begun to ache, and with a moan I put down my cane and buried my fingers in the pebbly ground. My nails scraped over rocks with a shiver.

"You're dumb, Dani," I said out loud, closing my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at the grey sky anymore. "You need to show Hiei what you _really_ are, not act like a stupid contradictory bitch, but you're never gonna get to do that if you just _sit_ here!"

I opened my eyes again. "I have to show him what I'm really worth," I murmured, and I held one hand up and let the rocks inside trickle out onto the ground. Then I raised my hand until I was seeing the sky through the web of my fingers. I started humming a second later, because that's what I do when I'm nervous or worried and feel like I need to calm down, and the song I hummed brought me a little comfort. It was "Time After Time" by Cyndi Lauper, the one Lauren always played for me when I was sad; the memory of her comforting me, telling me it would be OK, was soothing.

"What are you doing?" said a voice.

I froze, hum dying in my throat. I hadn't heard him walk up, though why that surprised me I can't say.

"Just… getting out for a bit?" I said, still staring at my hand through wide eyes. I couldn't see him; this made me nervous.

"Why?" he asked.

"Inside was stuffy," I replied, and my hand dropped so the crook of my elbow could cover my face. "Why are _you_ out here?"

He did not reply for a moment. Then: "Inside was stuffy."

I swallowed. "Oh. OK. That's cool."

"Your foot," he said.

"What about my foot?"

"It's bleeding."

I looked up to find that some of the sores had opened and were leaking sullen trickles of blood onto the stones. I didn't really care, though, and I sat up so I could put my face in my hands.

"I have to talk to you, Hiei," I said, eyes swimming in stars as the heels of my palms dug into their sockets.

Hiei did not reply. I breathed deep for a few seconds, centering myself, and then I spoke.

"I haven't been fair to you," I said. "I'm sorry. Really sorry. I know I'm stupid and sucky but please believe me when I say that _I'm_ _sorry_."

_Please_, went my inner monologue, _please, please forgive me._ _Tell me I'm being stupid, say 'nonsense' the way you do when you feel more emotion that you know how to express, say _anything_!_

My wish was granted.

"Sorry for what?" he said.

My head snapped up when I heard his tone—harsh, unforgiving, and blunt. It made the skin crawl across the back of my neck like ants, biting and pinching without yield.

"What are you sorry _for_, woman?" he repeated. I did not turn around to watch him speak; listening on its own was hard enough. "You're apologizing like a little fool but you're not admitting to anything, so it's all empty words no matter how pretty your voice makes them."

"I'm… sorry," I managed, and I heard something strike the stones behind me. He had probably stomped his foot in frustration.

"What _for_?" he snarled. "You keep saying it but I want to know what you're sorry _for_."

My apologetic nature frayed at the edges when his words grated my patience thin. "I think you know, Hiei," I said, feeling irritated.

"Given the way you've been acting, I doubt I could predict you any more than I could predict the roll of dice," he said without any trace of humor.

"And that's what I'm apologizing for!" I said, and I twisted around to look at him. He was standing a few feet away with his hands fisted at his sides, wearing just a shirt with no sleeves and high-waisted black pants. His eyes were narrow and accusatory, and they were very hard to look at. Still, I found myself unable to look away.

"I don't buy that," he said, lips curling in a sneer.

"Well you should," I retorted. It struck me, then, that the conversation was doing exactly what I didn't want it to do, and I groaned as I moved into a kneel and fisted my hands in my hair. "Fuck. _Fuck_. This isn't happening the way I planned it at all!"

I heard him scoff. "I've all but given up planning around _you_," he said.

I froze, eyes wide as I looked at him in shock. His face had contorted into a mask of barely contained rage, but all I could do was stare as I started to feel cold down to the core and think, think—

_What did he just say?_

"Don't give me that look," Hiei said through clenched teeth. I could practically see his pulse beating wild in his throat, and when I didn't move his eyes snapped open wide. "Don't look at me that way!" he snarled, and in a millisecond he was kneeling in front of me with a spray of stones. His hands clamped onto my upper arms, yanking me toward him so he could growl right in my face: "Quit giving me that _look_!"

"What look?" I said in a hushed voice, wrenching away from him in vain, and he held on fast. "Hiei—"

"You're looking at me like I just abandoned you," he said with a growl. I felt my skin start to heat up; it was hard to keep my cool when his nose was close enough to brush mine. "Like I just said I hated you or something."

"I can see why you would!" I said, bowing my head so I could squeeze my eyes shut in pain. "I've been such a _bitch_ to you!"

"In what way?"

Shame made my ever-present blush worsen. "You know how," I whispered, and one of his hands let me go long enough to grab my chin in hot fingers and force my face up. I found his eyes boring into mine from a distance of three inches, sharp eyeteeth bared in a look so feral I felt myself flinch.

"I want you to _say_ it," he hissed.

I whispered: "Why?"

"Because I need you to know what you've been _doing_ to me," he said, and when he said that he let out a rumbling growl and looked away, teeth tearing in his lower lip before he began glaring at me anew. "Now _talk_," he commanded. "Tell me what you've done and that _you're sorry for it_."

I floundered in the wake of his cherry eyes until words spilled across my lips. It was hard to think with him so near. "I've been relying on you," I said thickly, "and then I've been rejecting you for no reason."

"Good," said Hiei, and the fingers tightened on my jaw when I tried to look away. Red flashed like sirens and light. "_Look at me when you speak to me._"

"But, Hiei—"

But Hiei wasn't having any lip out of me. "What else have you done?" was his next demand.

I shuddered and said: "I've asked for your help, but sometimes I don't do what you say when you offer it on your own."

"And you've nearly gotten yourself killed, doing it!" he snarled. The hand on my arm shook me once, though I don't think he meant to do that. He was just so _mad_ at me. "And what else?"

"And I get mad when you just try to protect me, but you only ca—" I had started to say 'care,' but something stopped me. "It was just you being a good fr—" The first syllable of 'friend' slipped out, but that wasn't the right word, either, and I couldn't say it.

"Now you're getting it," Hiei said, though I don't know if he was talking about my hesitations or my apology in general, and when he stood up and pulled me to my feet I felt like I would pass out. Blackness swam at the edges of my vision. "Now say you're sorry for it all."

"I'm sorry," I blurted, but his expectant eyes made me keep going. The entire situation just felt so surreal; I felt like I was completely within Hiei's power in those few moments, and what was even worse was that _I wasn't even resisting_, dammit! He pulled things out of me I didn't know I felt—bareness and pain and a pure desire to be forgiven and be back in his good graces and just plain _good_, and later I'd look back on the situation and realize just how much I was acting like a puppy begging for its master's love. "I'm sorry for being bipolar and stupid, and I'm sorry for not listening to you and I _will_ listen to you next time, I _promise_ I will—"

"You do, do you?" he growled. "Then prove it with your actions, woman."

I went on like he hadn't spoken. "—and I'm sorry for treating you like you don't matter when you _do_."

There came, then, a very pregnant pause. We stared at each other, breath hissing in my chest because I was breathing hard, _so hard_, and Hiei just stared at me like he could see everything I thought I was trying to hide—

"I matter," he said, but it wasn't a question. His face dipped so close to mine I could practically taste him, and with every word I felt his breath fan across my mouth in a wave of pure heat. "That's right. _I matter_. Don't forget that."

He let me go, then, and I stumbled backward before I somehow caught myself. My knees buckled as I ogled him, stunned and feeling embarrassment creeping up my chest and neck and cheeks in a wave of pink flush, but I somehow didn't fall over and the only thing I could think as he turned away was _What the hell just _happened_?_

Hiei looked at me over his shoulder, eyes flicking to my foot with a smirk and a lazy smile. The sudden turnaround in his emotional palette left me even more confused, and I licked my lips as I tried to figure out what to say.

Had he just… forgiven me?

Or _what_?

What the hell just _happened_?

Hiei beat me to the punch as far as speaking went. "Go bind up your foot," he said, and I stared at him, flabbergasted, as he started walking back toward the house over the stones. My eyes stayed glued between his shoulder blades, frustration making my mouth work as I struggled with a reaction.

"Why the hell should—" I started to yell at him, pride beginning to smart as I realized how submissive I had been acting for the past five minutes and I did _not_ like that, not one bit. I wanted him to turn around and face me, dammit, because we weren't done here and I was about to give him a piece of my mind for manhandling me like that, but...

… but something made me stop and think.

"Go bind up my…" I said to myself as he went inside the house. "Go bind up… oh, damn you, Hiei, you are a _sneaky_ bastard."

It had occurred to me, you see, that Hiei was testing my sincerity in a roundabout fashion. I had just apologized for not taking his advice and discounting his words as inconsequential, and, wow, look what we have here!

Hiei had just given me an _order_!

There were only two options at that point. Put off binding up my foot, thereby making my apology mean nothing since I didn't follow through with my promise to listen to him, or bind up my foot and prove that I really did value Hiei's words like I said I did.

It was just that in doing so, I'd also prove that I was basically Hiei's little…

"Why do I feel like I just enslaved myself to him?" I muttered, and with a sigh I headed for the house.

* * *

They all turned when I opened the door and shut it behind me, but I just gave the guys—including Hiei, who sat with the others with a smirk—a bright and cheery smile. Kuwabara was frying something that smelled like meat in a pan over the fire, face screwed up in concentration as he used a metal fork to stir it. He looked away from his task, however to ask me: "Everything OK now?"

"Getting there," I said, and I couldn't help but glance at Hiei. He was staring into the fire, lips quirked as if at some private joke, but I tried not to look at him again when I crossed the room and approached the large crate by the amazon-sized door.

"Getting _where_?" Yusuke griped, leaning over to punch Kuwabara's arm. The psychic nearly spilled the food he was making and yelped, shooting Yusuke a dirty look. "You wouldn't tell me anything while they were gone!"

"That's because it's none of your _business_, Urameshi!" Kuwabara snapped.

Kurama's eyes tracked my progress to the crate. "Do you know what's in that?" he asked, curious, and he got up to join me. The crate was a little taller than I was, but Kurama could see over it fairly well. "I've been wondering since your friend—"

"Karla," I said.

"—brought it in here," he finished.

The crate did not appear to have any hinges on its sides, and it was made of thick planks of dark wood pressed so close together that it looked nearly water tight. "She said it had my medicine in it. For the cough and my foot and stuff," I told him, standing on my tiptoes as I tried to see over the top. "How do we open it?"

I heard a crack a second later, and then Kurama was pulling off the top of the crate like it was tissue. He took the lid and leaned it against the box's side, and when he caught me staring at him with my mouth open he smiled and said: "Plants listen to me."

"But…"

"Wood is a plant, even if it's a dead one," he said, looking at me like I was a simpleton who needed to be babied (though I could tell he was doing it on purpose thanks to the humored gleam in his eye).

"Right," I said, glancing at the box again. I leaned my cane next to the lid, grabbed the crate's open lip, and heaved myself up the way I'd pull myself out of a pool. With a twist I managed to sit down on the edge, knees hanging over the outside edge as I turned my torso around so I could look inside. "Ooh, neat," I said. "They gave us fruit!"

"I wonder how they manage to grow that around here," Kurama mused, brow furrowing. "Pass it down and I'll share it with the others."

"'Kay," I said, and I passed him a mesh sack of what appeared to be melons the size of my fist with pale pink rinds and swirling ridges. There were banana-ish things, too, though they had purple peels, and they had also given us what were definitely potatoes. Beneath the fruit layer, even pots and pans of lightweight metal had made it into the crate, and those things rested on top of folded blankets, furs, and towels. Nestled in the blankets and beneath the pots, however, was a large wooden box polished to a high gleam, and I recognized it as a twin to the box Karla had had when she treated me in the city. I passed the box down to Kurama and then got back on the ground, taking it from him with a grin as we rejoined the others.

"Dude, potatoes, sweet!" Kuwabara said when he saw them. "Hand me one of those pots and I can make us some stew!"

Kurama carried the pots and food over and sat down. They had arranged the cushions and blankets from the pile in the corner in a circle around the fire, allowing everyone a comfortable place to sit. "I'm glad you like to cook, Kuwabara," Kurama said as the psychic began to dice and peel things with fast hands.

"I've been helping Yukina in the kitchen so much that I've started to like it," he explained as I sat opposite the fire from Hiei, with Yusuke on my left and Kurama on my right. Kuwabara sat between Hiei and Yusuke, though we all had some space between us.

"But are you any good at it?" Yusuke grumbled, and he shot me a look crossed between annoyance and good-natured teasing. "Shouldn't _Dani_ be the one cooking? She's a girl!"

"Need I remind you that you're my bitch?" I deadpanned, and Yusuke's jaw dropped. Kuwabara chortled. Kurama rolled his eyes. Hiei gave me a look that said I was pushing it. "Gosh, y'all are so uptight! I was kidding!"

"I understood," Kurama said with a chuckle. "But, as I said I would, I thought up some questions for you to ask on your excursion tomorrow." He produced a piece of lined paper from nowhere and handed it to me. "Read this and memorize is contents."

"Aye aye, cap'n," I murmured, eyes scanning the page. Aloud, I read: "Learn the nature of the Bright Lady, the male involvement with the Hunt, the male role in the Sisters' reproductive—" I looked up with a scowl. "Gee, Kurama, that's a little awkward, don't you think?"

"Not at all," was his infuriating response. "A thought occurred to me while you were… out."

His eyes twinkled when he said 'out.' I tried not to notice.

"In societies were one sex is thought to be dominant over the other, dangerous jobs and grunt work are typically given to the weaker sex," he explained. "However, we saw only women going on a dangerous reconnaissance mission. Though women of the Sisters' specie might be stronger than their men, I don't see why they would willingly sacrifice their precious women on a mission like that."

"I guess that make sense," Kuwabara muttered, pushing a mound of potatoes into the pot with a splash.

Kurama nodded. "You also reported that you saw women in the town, but no men, and that the women were all concerned with things like going to market and craftsmanship."

"True," I relented. "There weren't any guys in sight."

"Yes. If the case were that the women were physically strong, and therefore the hunters," he said, "it would stand to reason that the men would do things like gathering food at market, wouldn't it? But this is _not_ the case. Women take _all_ roles in this society. Logistically, this just doesn't add up." As an afterthought he added: "And since most populations produce a mostly-equal ratio of men to women, how come there are so many women but the men are few enough to be kept on an island the size of this one?"

"You don't think they kill off the guys, do you?" Yusuke asked nervously, but Kurama shook his head.

"I don't," he said. "I think there _are_ no men."

I raised an eyebrow. "But they said—"

"—that the men are on a small island," Kurama said. "They didn't say if they're the same specie as the Sisters. Learning if the Sisters are hermaphroditic or asexual would greatly increase the number of inferences I can make in regards to their culture."

"So it's not awkward," I said.

Kurama smiled.

"—for you, anyway. Just how the hell am I supposed to bring that conversation up? 'Excuse me, I need to know if you guys randomly pop out babies because I want to know if there are men your size to deal with, too?'"

Kurama cleared his throat, nervous. "Perhaps a bit more subtlety wouldn't go amiss."

"Right," I said, and I went back to studying the questions. The light from the fire was barely bright enough to read by, but I didn't want to go outside again so I persevered. Eventually Kuwabara finished cooking and we ate, a meaty stew with potatoes that tasted like wonder made edible. I was starving, I realized, because I hadn't eaten since we first came to Demon World, and to my intense relief Kuwabara turned out to be a great cook.

"That was to-notch," even Yusuke had to admit when he asked for thirds.

I was trying to peel one of those purple bananas, fingers like wood against the fleshy exterior, and I gave up with a sigh. "Can someone open this for me?"

Kurama was nearest, so he took it and somehow revealed the neon orange fruit within. "This fruit is filling, so eat slowly," he said when he handed it to me.

One bite (it tasted like a mix of lemon, mint, and vanilla) made me feel like I'd eaten an entire feast by myself, and with a grimace I set it aside. "That's… weird."

"Most fruits in Demon World take some getting used to," Kurama agreed.

"Noted." I reached for the wooden medicine box at my side and opened it. Inside was a small clay pot full of a pungent brown paste, a packet of leaves tied up with string (for my throat-mending tea, I assumed), a little blue jar full of pills floating in what appeared to be honey, and rolls of linen bandages. There were also a few sterile white cloths, and I assumed I was supposed to use those to put on the salve.

Now that I was full and prepared for the coming day, I realized there was only one thing left for me to do. "I'll be back in a bit," I said as I stood up, box held tight under my arm. "Thanks for the meal, Kuwabara. It was delicious."

"Where are you going?" he asked, and I jerked my head toward the bathroom as I turned around.

I only made it two steps away by the time Hiei asked, voice low and husky: "What's in the box?"

A deep breath made my throat ache before I turned around. "Medicine," I said, trying not to look at the smirk blossoming across his features as I knelt, opened the box, and took out the packet of tea leaves. "Kurama, could you brew these? They're for tea. I'm supposed to drink it for my throat and stuff."

"Of course," he said, taking the packet, and we smiled before I excused myself—keeping my eyes as far away from the watching Hiei as possible—and went into the bathroom.

I set up shop on one of the small stone tables in the antechamber, laying out the bandages, salve, pills, and cloths so I could easily get to them. Then I hopped up onto the table and unscrewed the pill jar, dipping my fingers into the honey so I could extract one gooey golden pill. The honey made it go down smooth, and I made sure no one was watching when I licked the excess honey from my fingers. I wondered again where the amazons got things like honey, but I resolved to ask the next day when I went into the city for music lessons.

After that I started on my foot, but it was dusty and bloody from walking around outside so I had to wash if, first. After it was clean and the sores were free of dirt, I hopped back up on the table and cracked my knuckles. I used one of the small white cloths to scoop up some of the paste in the second jar and spread it over the sores on my foot. When they were all coated in deliciously cool and tingly balm, I left the smear-cloth on top of the worst of them and took out the bandages.

This is when I realized that I'm never going to be a doctor.

Ever.

Being a cripple means I don't play sports or do strenuous activity. This means I have little experience in wrapping up things like sprains or injuries. The worst I'd ever done to myself was fracture a wrist when I was twelve, but that meant I needed a cast and rest and the doctors took care of pretty much everything. Ho hum, right? Right. Anyway, I couldn't get the bandages to stay in place; they slipped and slid over my skin, clinging to the salve and then smearing it off of my sores when I pulled too hard in any direction. Eventually I managed to wrestle the bandages into staying still, but they looked horribly messy and they were stained with brown salve and rusty blood, because my inexperienced motions managed to open more than one of my wounds.

"Finally!" I griped when I was finished. I left the medicine on the table and went out to rejoin the others, and right as I opened the door to the big room I heard a whistle of steam. Kurama had put a kettle over the fire, and as I walked I saw him pouring the boiling water over a strainer filled with leaves. The water streamed through them and into a mug below, which he handed to me when I was sitting down. His eyes traveled to my foot.

"Did you need help with that?" he asked, eyebrow hitching high.

I took a sullen sip of my tea. It tasted sweet, but there was a strict bitterness hiding underneath that made my toes curl even as my throat went slightly numb.

"I managed," I said between hot sips. "Somehow."

"Ask one of us next time. It will go easier." A pause. "And you might not waste as much salve."

I stuck my tongue out at him in retaliation. "Ever hear that practice makes perfect?"

When I looked at Hiei after trying for so long to ignore him, I saw that he was staring at me.

After catching my eye, he glanced at my foot, smirked, and let out a low laugh that made my toes curl.

* * *

The rest of the day passed quietly, because there simply was not much to do. Kuwabara had thought to bring a pack of cards, and all of us (besides Hiei, of course) played a rousing game of Go Fish until Yusuke lost and accused Kuwabara of cheating, which he wasn't but try telling that to an irate Yusuke and you'll end up with a black eye.

Kuwabara and I played Slap-Jack instead. He won about six rounds of it in a row, thanks to my total lack of reflexes, and the one time I managed to get a good slap in he got over-zealous and slapped down onto my hand so hard that I yelped.

"Sorry, sorry!" he burbled, face contorted into an apologetic mask.

"Just play on," I said, and after that I mysteriously kept winning. After this went on for an hour, with Kuwabara making totally over-exaggerated faces of disappointment whenever I won, I snapped: "Letting me win isn't much fun, Kuwabara."

"Letting—?" he said, feigning surprise. "I would never do that, Dani!"

"Yeah, right," I said, and I bridged the cards and handed them back to him. "Anyway, I think the thrill of that game got lost a few rounds ago."

His façade crumpled. "Yeah, it's not fun without a challenge. No offense."

"None taken. I'm a weakling." I flopped back against my furry cushion and sighed up at the ceiling. "Now if only I had that ukulele, I could…"

"You do have it."

I froze.

"Botan put it in your backpack," Yusuke went on like it was obvious and I was dumb for not noticing. "She didn't tell you?"

"No, she didn't," I said sourly, and I scrambled for my bag. True to his word, the instrument was tucked under my parcel of clothing. Someone had de-tuned the strings so they wouldn't break in my bag ("How thoughtful," I muttered), and with a grin I carried it back over to my seat and started twisting the tuning pegs with a frown.

"You can do that by ear?" Kuwabara asked, scooting over to sit in front of me so he could watch.

"Yeah. It's not too hard," I said, strumming out an on-key chord. "Anyone can do it with practice, unless you're totally tone deaf or something." I glanced at Kurama. "Hey, you got anymore of that paper you wrote those questions on?"

To my pleasure, he had an entire spiral notebook of it and a pen, plus a blessing for me to use as much as I wanted. With Kuwabara watching I put the ukulele aside (he picked it up almost immediately and started playing random notes with too-big hands) and jotted down some notes in English. Once I was finished transcribing the lyrics to a song, I stared at them and hesitantly wrote something next to them in Japanese. I almost immediately crossed it out and rewrote it, not liking how my efforts were panning out at all.

Kuwabara leaned forward so he could see. "You're translating!" he said, squinting at my messy hiragana. "Wow. You need to work on your handwriting."

"Shut it, you," I said, and I looked at my lyrics with a frown. "Japanese and English are very different, but I think I got this first verse down OK…"

"Play it!" Kuwabara said, thrusting the ukulele into my lap with one hand as he jerked the notebook away with the other. He held it up so I could see my writing, his face peeking over the top in anticipation.

I felt nervous all of a sudden. "This might come out stupid," I hedged, "so allow me a little wiggle room, OK?"

"OK."

"Cool." I took a deep breath, strummed the first chord, and tried to sing. It stung my throat and the words were really, _really_ hoarse, but I held back and somehow managed not to choke on myself. Luckily the song was almost spoken-word, so I didn't stress myself too much.

"'I'm in trouble, I'm an addict, I'm addicted to this boy, he's got my heart tied in a…'" I stopped singing after only a few lines, realizing that my lyrics were way too literal sounding to be used as good lyrics. So I asked: "What's a cliché Japanese expression that means 'she ties my heart in knots,' or something like it?"

Kuwabara ran through a few, and I picked the one that fit the best. "Anyway: she's got my heart tied in a knot and my stomach…" Another pause, another question: "Um… what's a good phrase that means you're nervous?"

This time, it was Kurama who shot an expression my way. I thanked him with a smile, realizing with a blush that Kuwabara wasn't my only audience member (I get oblivious when I play; what can I say?). Still, I persevered because I was too deep in to stop.

Things went on in this vein for a while, with Kuwabara and Kurama providing some good phrases when my knowledge of the language stopped stretching far enough. Even Yusuke thought up a few, though Hiei remained quiet and separated from our little group. Every now and then I caught him looking in our direction, though that could have been a trick of the firelight reflecting in his eyes.

The song got finished after about an hour of serious translation, and Kuwabara requested I play it through all the way so he could hear the words. I did so with a bit more nervousness that I was used to showing. Lyrics, to me, were always the hardest part of a song, and since I usually sang songs to the boys in English, I was used to having a bit of a smokescreen between myself and the meanings behind a song. Now they could all see it for what it was, however, and I wasn't sure if I liked that as I sang NeverShoutNever's rather sentimental song, "Trouble."

"I like the tune," Kuwabara said when I was finished, "but sometime the lyrics are really stiff."

"Must be hard when you're not a native," Yusuke said. "You'll work on it. We can help!"

I chuckled. "I would have thought you'd think writing songs was girly, Yusuke."

"Hey, guys with guitars get chicks," he said with a laugh. Then he got shifty. "Um, don't tell Keiko I said that."

"Noted," Kurama said. He looked back to me. "You'll get better at translating with practice. Perhaps we should try another song?"

I flipped away from my scribble-covered page and onto a new one in the notebook. "I have a few in mind," I said, and I played the first chord to 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow.'

* * *

Since my music was, apparently, the only reprieve from boredom in sight, we spent the rest of the day messing with songs. Kuwabara got really into it; Kurama listened in on us with a smile and more than a few helpful hints. Yusuke took a nap at one point (I don't know how he fell asleep with so much background noise), and I couldn't tell if Hiei liked listening or thought we were annoying. He didn't leave us, at any rate, so take that as you will.

Soon, however, we took a break to eat dinner, and then after a few more songs that caused my out-of-practice left index finger to get cut and start bleeding on one of the ukulele's strings, we decided it was time to go to bed.

Joy, right? We're all tired and kind of grumpy, and now we get to sleep. Great!

At least, it _should_ have been great. With Yusuke, things are never that simple.

"I am NOT sleeping in the middle!" he said, staring at the pile of bedding like it was a monster. "I'm going to be on the edge and that's FINAL."

"But I want to be on the edge!" Kuwabara said.

"Why don't we all just use our sleeping bags?" I asked, but then Kuwabara revealed that the Sisters had confiscated them and that plan got blown all to hell. The bedding they provided was tied down to one spot, so basically we had a giant furry mattress with a bunch of blankets on it in piles, and unless we slept on the mattress we'd end up with cricks in our necks. Of course, that meant we'd all have to sleep together in one giant dog pile (which is probably what the Sisters expected us to want to do) but this was NOT OK with Yusuke because he thought Kuwabara would try cuddling with him in the night and that was way too homo for him, thanks.

"I would not cuddle you, Urameshi, because you STINK," was the psychic's retort, but before a fight could break out I jumped in the middle.

"There are two edges, you know," I said, and they paused mid-punch to look at me. "Just sleep on opposite sides of the bed and you'll be fine."

"But _you_ have to sleep on the edge, Dani!" Kuwabara said, aghast. "You're a _girl_! You can't sleep in the middle of a bunch of _guys_!"

"If it keeps you two from acting like two-year-olds, then I really don't give a shit," I said, and they looked at one another before shrugging.

"I also think you should be in the middle, Dani," Kurama interjected. He was studying the pile of bedding with a critical eye. "If the Sisters were to come in and see you sleeping on the edge like an outcast, they might get suspicious."

My stomach flipped, suddenly a little nervous. I'd been told by Lauren at our sleepovers that I was a notorious cuddler. "Well, I guess it's settled. I get middle."

"I call not-sleeping-next-to-Dani!" Yusuke chortled. "And I call edge! HA!"

"Well screw you too, buddy," I said, glaring.

"And no offense, but I want the edge, too," Kuwabara said. "I want to be as far away from Yusuke as possible."

"What?"

"Well, you kick!"

"I do _not_ you big—"

I looked at Kurama and Hiei (though I mostly just looked at Kurama because looking at Hiei was too much for me to handle). "Do you two mind, since these idiots…?"

They exchanged a glance, and Hiei scowled.

"I don't plan on sleeping in here," the fire demon said, tossing his head before turning away. "I prefer the outdoors."

For some reason, I felt a little hurt by the look of disdain in his eye. _What, do you think I'll snore or something?_ I thought, hand tightening around my cane. _Oh well, Kurama won't let him leave. We can't split up or—_

To my surprise, Kurama did _not_ try to persuade Hiei to join us. "We need a lookout for when the Sisters return," he agreed, and he looked at Kuwabara as Hiei walked out of the house and disappeared. "Dani will sleep between you and I, since Yusuke refuses."

"Sorry," I said to Kuwabara, and his cheeks went a little pink.

"It's not that I mind, really," he said, scratching the back of his neck. "We're friends, after all. I just don't want to make…" He hesitated, eyes darting to Hiei before he looked back at me. "—_people_ uncomfortable."

"Oh, you won't," I said with a touch of viciousness that made Kurama and Kuwabara raise their eyebrows, and I grabbed my backpack. "I'm going to put on pajamas. I'll be back soon."

A chorus of 'OK's followed me out, and as I completed my nighttime routine I felt a very strange wash of emotions flow over me.

_Hiei likes me,_ I fumed, tugging my day-shirt off with a jerk. _He likes me and the opportunity to sleep next to me comes up, and he says he prefers the outdoors? That _jerk_!_

A small, hidden part of me thought_: Shouldn't you be grateful that you don't have to get too close to him so soon?_

And another whispered: _You're pretty torn up about not getting to be next to him. Was someone looking forward to it, maybe? _

"Oh shut up," I told myself as I brushed my teeth in a small basin in the corner. Water flowed into it from a small spigot on the wall and flowed out of it through a drain in the bottom, an endless fountain of clean water for whoever needed it.

As I washed my face, I tried to wash away my confused feelings, too.

Needless to say, it didn't work.

* * *

NOTES:

**EDIT: Since a bunch of you have expressed worry/disappointment over the "apology" between Hiei and Dani, I just want to let you all know that NO, DANI DOES NOT LET HIEI GET AWAY WITH HIS JERKINESS SCOTT FREE. Please know that I plan on pointing a few (well deserved) fingers at the fire demon, too.**

_At first, I wrote the HieixDani apology scene with Dani monologueing about how dumb she is, Hiei not saying anything, then saying 'nonsense' and everything being fine. But that was STUPID. I realized that Hiei getting angry would probably be more in character and the perfectionist side of me had to scrap 4,000 words of CRAP, and rewrite it as it is now. I think it's better that way. I think that's also why I might be updating later than usual. FORGIVE ME!_

_BUT! Dani will NOT let Hiei's trickery, pushiness, and dominance slide without some retaliation. She might have apologized, but Hiei was a domineering jerk about it. She does not like this. More to come._

_Songs mentioned: "Trouble" by NeverShoutNever (which is played on a ukulele!), and the title "Apologize." I had the covered version of it by Silverstein in mind when I used it for the title._

_This was supposed to go on WAY LONGER than it did, and some of the stuff in this dragged out way longer than I wanted it to. Alas, nothing happened as planned._

_Next chapter we get a big old HieiXDani moment. I wanted it here, but honestly I just don't have the stamina to write it right now. Plus the next chapter would probably end up being really short without that added moment, so… maybe it'll work out for the best?_

_Oh, and the plot happens soon. Yeah. Bye bye filler! (THANK THE HIGHER POWERS!)_

_I stayed up all night last night, so I guess I haven't slept since Sunday. My grandmother had surgery this morning at 5 AM and I wanted to stay up so I could call her at 3:30 to wish her love and luck. She came out of surgery at 3 PM this afternoon, and I am THRILLED to report that she is in great shape and they were able to remove the biggest tumors without complication! YAY! I cried when I heard the news; I love that woman more than anyone in the world. She's the person who encouraged me to write when my parents said it was nothing but a fantasy, so I credit her with letting my creativity be put to use. I LOVE YOU, NANA! Also, the deal with my Nana has been what's bothering me lately (and since I REALLY wanted to let people know she's OK, I guess it's pointless to hide it now). Hearing that the most important person in your world is dying isn't good on your mental health. BUT she's getting better and that means I will get better, too, and everything is bright and happy and wonderful and fun and YAY._

_Just… yay._

_Since this past week has been preparing-for-finals week paired with worrying-about-Nana's-surgery week, I apologize if this chapter was sloppy, and I apologize for not replying to reviews like I've been wanting to. I've REALLY been wanting to! But since this week will be better, I promise to reply. I shall deliver, I swear! And many thanks to my lovely reviewers (last chapter, for whatever reason, was the highest reviewed chapter in the history of this story). You spoil me rotten every week and I couldn't be more grateful if I tried! And without further ado, I love you people: Kai-Chan94, Angel of Randomosity, Masuyo Shun, Sarah Jackson – The Other, HeeHeeHee01, LadyoftheGags, Naitza-Kururugi, Afiercebeauty, Doily Rox, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, itsallaboutbob, Tally Youngblood, chocolateluvr13, Reclun, Kaiya's Watergarden, AkaMizu-Chan, Dragon of Twilight, Supreme Baka, sweetyjg, Koryu Elric, cranberryben, ovenfreshh, Asking Alice, archangel fighter, Raging Lulu, colbub, j.d.y., yumchaitea, Foxgirl Ray, shishifearme, Ry171819, WorldsAngel, Razorgaze, Heart's Icy Touch, 0nfateswings, etowa-ru, dude where's my spirit gun, DragonDancer93, Fuurai, NAO-chan33, Supreme Baka, AnimeFreak2306 (isn't it bad that the week you review to tell me you're happy I update on a schedule, I nearly miss that schedule entirely? I SUCK!), LupinePhyre909, Selfish Desires, TurtleKid, ichixichigo, SillGoddessDisco, I luv hieixkurama, Yukina, destinyswindow, rain chant, Katt Jeane, Danza Palooza, darkravensnight, ShadowFireFox13, Otaku Wench, AlyssHeart71!_


	45. Chapter 45: A Kiss To Send Us Off

Future Talk

Chapter 45:

"A Kiss To Send Us Off"

* * *

We slept in a row, each of us wrapped in blankets so tight we must have looked like four burritos laid out for a fiesta. It was physically comfortable, _of course it was_, because the mattress was as squishy as a cartoon cloud and the blankets and furs were warm and soft, but I still couldn't fall asleep for about half an hour because people were lying _next_ to me, dammit, and that was so _un_comfortable you could taste it in the air. We'd all carefully avoided eye contact when I got back from the bathroom and it became impossible to put off lying down any longer, and after a chorus of mumbled 'good night's we settled into thick silence. No one moved, no one tossed and turned, no one relaxed until Kuwabara's soft snoring rumpled the air. Then Kurama burrowed into his blankets with a sigh, the tension went out of Yusuke's shoulders like water draining from a sieve, and I took a few deep breaths, pulled the covers over my head, and finally drifted off.

Predictably, I dreamed of Koenma.

"Is this too soon, after…?" he asked, not meeting my eyes. Oddly enough, he was coming to me in the real-world this time, dressed in his torn and dirty robes and looking terribly out of place. I sat up, momentarily confused by his presence, and saw the others sleeping peacefully at my sides—Kurama's face and body were composed, but Yusuke had sprawled out and was draped halfway over Kuwabara, who snored on without notice.

I didn't answer right away, choosing instead to twist my head and look behind me. My body lay completely covered by the blanket, not even with my face exposed. I could trace the lines of my shoulders and hips through the material, but details were lost to me.

"Coming to your dream-self as a phantom is easier than pulling you into a place where we can be alone," he said quietly, and I looked back at him. He stood behind the fire with his face in shadow.

I stood up instead of answering, watching my spirit exit the lump of my shell without comment. I was wearing the white robe from the hospital again, and my foot—much to my immediate pleasure—was whole.

"That's an added benefit," Koenma said, looking at the same thing.

"Thanks," I said, hopping from leg to leg. Our eyes met, and I felt a rush of warmth make my cheeks go pink. The last time we had been together we had talked about our feelings, about how nothing could ever come of them but how they were _there_ and _strong_ regardless, and now...

How was I supposed to act after knowing such hope mixed with such despair?

I had no idea. "What now?" I said, crossing my arms over my chest to cover my growing discomfort.

"Whatever you'd like," he said, and I thought about that before answering. A rather pressing question—one which left little room for the tender sort of emotions I had been feeling well within me—popped up within a few seconds.

"Did you know there were people living here who spoke English?" I asked.

His mouth opened, but then it closed. He looked away, down at his feet with hands clenched tight at his sides.

"You _did_ know," I said, and when he started to speak with apologetic eyes I cut him off, the edges of my emotions shriveling like dead leaves. "Don't make excuses and tell me that there are things you can't tell me yet, because I kind of already figured that one out."

"Of course," he said.

His calm answer made my frustration grow. Here I was, feeling all vulnerable and confused, and he had the gall to be so, so, so _calm_ about all of this!

The vindictive part of me suddenly wanted to make him squirm—if I was going to feel vulnerable then so was _he_.

"I mean, I was a _fool_ to think you could ever help me with the whole truth," I said, barbing the words as best I could.

This time I managed to shake him a little bit. "You know I would tell you everything if it would be helpful to you, but it's not." His eyes bored into mine like drill bits.

"Save it," I snapped, not wanting to give him the upper hand. "And my body—did you know that it, or something like it, came here once?"

This time he couldn't help but look away again. "I… don't think I should tell you about that," he said.

"Fine." I tossed my head. "OK. Fine. Whatever."

Lips thinned into a hard line, like he was trying to suppress his true thoughts but didn't really want to at all. "Try to understand, Dani—"

"Oh, I'm _trying_," I said, "I'm trying so hard it hurts. It's just a teensy bit painful to find out that the person I trust above everybody else has been lying to me since the beginning of this whole mess." I chuckled at the irony of my next line. "Kind of a world-shaking realization, right?"

His breath shuddered in his throat, nerves fluttering so loudly I fancied I could actually hear them. "I could imagine so," he said.

"And it hurts even worse," I said, wanting him to _hurt_, dammit, because he was hurting me, "when the person lying to me is someone I care so much about."

Koenma's eyes squeezed shut. "I'm sorry," he said. "Dani, I'm so sorry. But if I tell you the things you'll soon learn, you won't be able to do what needs to be done."

"Bullshit," I said. "That's complete and utter—"

"You would never have come to this place had Ryu not come onto the scene," Koenma said. I froze, not knowing what to think about that. "I told you once that your presence has changed this world in drastic ways, and this is one of them."

"So you're saying that Ryu's existence is my fault? That I _made_ him exist?" I asked.

He did not answer me. "This place, these people," he said, "had I told you about them before, you would have tried to come here to learn the truth about America's past, and you would have abandoned your mission to do it."

Indignant, I started to protest that no, I would _not_ have abandoned my mission, but then his eyes opened and caught me where I stood.

"You are lonely," he said, irises flashing like molten caramel. "Do not pretend that the lure of your fellows wouldn't have swayed your course."

I didn't want to think about if he was right or not, so I changed the subject like a coward. "Ryu's here, in this place, you know," I said. "I'm getting on the Sisters' good side so we can get close to him without suspicion. Once we have him locked up, all we have to worry about is Seishou, and since they're buddies we might be able to use Ryu as bait and get Seishou taken care of, too."

Koenma nodded, a smile breaking through his solemnity. "You have come far. Only a few more trials and then you'll be free of this… burden." Eyes of toffee and warmth reflected inward, pained but not because of something I had said.

My heart stabbed inward on itself. "You're no burden, Koenma," I said thickly, and I tried not to think about why it felt so right to walk forward and wrap my arms around his waist. He hesitated before returning the gesture, hands tight as he wrapped his arms around my shoulders and grasped my biceps as if I would fly to pieces if he didn't.

"Sometimes I wonder why I picked someone so bipolar as my chosen one," he said, chuckling in a dark sort of way. Cool breath stirred my spirit's hair. "You were glaring at me a few seconds ago."

My arms tightened. He smelled like dust and cloth and spice—Koenma through and through. "Shut up," I told him. "I'm enjoying this and you don't need to be telling me how weird I am. Hiei's been reminding me enough as it is."

I knew I'd said something wrong when I felt his joints lock up, and I knew he was going to push me away before he even moved. "Hiei," he said as he held me at arm's length and stared me straight in the eye. I flinched at the heat I found there. "Dani…"

This was all I could say: "Yes?"

Fingers tightened on my collarbone. "I don't mean to keep you from… living—" that last word was forced out with a bite of his lower lip "—but Hiei is not someone to be toyed with."

Memories of crimson bubbling with anger and, at the same time, mirth made me sigh. "I know that," I told him.

"And I don't want to keep you from being happy, but…" he said, and I could tell he was having trouble articulating what he felt on the inside.

"But you don't like it," I said softly. Hair had fallen into his eyes, and I lifted a hand to brush it away. With a breath he leaned into my palm, eyes falling shut. "Koenma…"

Eyes flickered at the sound of his name.

"I'm… confused," I said.

"Want to talk about it?"

I hesitated.

His eyes cracked open, and one hand came up to press mine tighter to his cheek. The feeling of cool fingers brushing over mine made me shiver. "I won't be angry," he said in a whisper, and it really did feel like I was dreaming when he turned his face to the side and lightly kissed my palm. His lips were cool, dry, and smooth. "Just tell me."

I breathed deep before giving a reply. "When I look at you," I said, and grimaced. "It's really cheesy and stupid."

He snorted. "Do I care?"

"… I feel like I've come home."

He let our hands drop, and he curled my fingers into his with a smile so small I barely saw it form.

"It's comforting and sweet," I went on, voice gaining a little strength. "I can relax, and I can let down walls because I know you'll see past them anyway and I know you won't judge me because _you get me. _You know?"

His smile grew. "I know."

"It's like walking into air conditioning on a hot day," I said. "All my worries kind of… evaporate. I feel calm and collected and cool."

"A balm for a worried heart," he said, and I wasn't sure if he was quoting something or what, so I didn't comment.

"Yes," I said. "You're a safe haven. I can rely on you… and even if you do keep things from me and make me mad sometimes, I know that you have some overreaching plan that I should trust. And even though I'm not the type to trust blindly like that, with you I just can't help myself." I felt a frown form. "Freud would go nuts, but it's kind of like the relationship I have with my dad, only…"

I blushed. Koenma smirked, raised my knuckles to his lips, and kissed them.

"Only, _that_," I said lamely, watching his mouth as my cheeks burned brighter still. "I guess that's to be expected of two people stranded on a metaphorical desert island, of course, but still."

"But still," he agreed, taking both my hands in his. His next words were delicate, but tense. "And Hiei?"

I froze, wide-eyed. My mouth suddenly felt dry—too dry.

He winced. "I'm afraid of what that look hides."

"It's," I said, and stopped. I looked down at my unharmed feet for a minute, gathering myself, and when I spoke next I stared at Koenma's chest instead of his questing eyes. "If what I feel for you is cool and refreshing, what I feel for Hiei is…"

"Hot," Koenma supplied. His tone was crisp like winter.

I shuddered. "Burning," I said, feeling the words start to bubble up inside. "And infuriating—_really_ infuriating. He's not like _you_ at all, because for the most part you have this weird ability to make me feel like a _person_ again. But Hiei, _well_, I can't predict _what_ he'll do or what _I_ could do to get on his good side. It's like the littlest things can turn him against me, but he'll overlook huge things that I'd think would send him running for the hills for no reason other than _he wants to_. We've been through similar things and I think our insecurities are really similar, too, and I think he sees bits of himself in me because we both have these weird _walls_, you know? And Kuwabara thinks that Hiei wants to set up mutual walls we can both hide behind, because apparently having walls is enough to make two people have a connection, and—"

"Dani—"

"And with you, it's a give and take," I said, desperate to get these words out at long last. "You give me as much as you take, but with Hiei I can never tell _what_ our dynamics are. He goes out of his way for me all the time but he never asks for anything in return, only I feel like he still manages to take things I don't even realize I'm giving, and yet lately he's become totally domineering and weird and I feel like he's trying to _impress_ me or something, though most girls don't like it when boys give them _bruises_, for crying out loud, and I just don't get him and he's confusing and every time I feel like I'm getting somewhere he does something to throw me totally off-base!"

My breath was coming quick in my throat at that point, and I made the mistake of looking up at Koenma. His hands tightened around mine, and his eyes had gone similarly grim.

"So Hiei is a firestorm, and I'm a cool breeze," he said. He sounded… 'resigned', I think that's the right word. "One is comforting, but one moves you more."

"That's not true," I protested. This time _I_ was the one who clutched at _his_ hands. "You move me. You do."

"So you say."

"Hiei makes me feel like I'm lost. You make me feel like I've been found," I said, urgency making my words spill in a hurry.

"But isn't being lost something of a thrill?"

"Isn't the oddity of feeling safe pretty thrilling at this point in my life, too?" I shot back.

"But will it feel the same once the threat wears off?"

"Why are you fighting me?" I snapped. "I'm trying to convince you that _I love you_ and you're rejecting me at every turn! I mean, most people would be happy about that, but you—" I stopped talking when I caught the stunned look on his face, and after replaying my words in my head I froze, too.

_Did I… did I just drop the L-Word?_ I thought, glassy eyes watching the way Koenma's mouth worked in consternation.

My knee-jerk reaction was to take the word back, damn me to hell. "Sorry, I don't know why I said that," I said, babbling like a brook. "I just—"

"Do you think about me all the time?" he said, voice displaying a startling lack of emotion.

I couldn't answer that. I thought about him a lot, of course, but it wasn't like he occupied every thought I had—much of the time I tried _not_ to think of him, I tried hard to put his image out of my mind when it inevitably popped up a dozen times a day, because I knew the alternative would only lead to pain.

Or was the constant avoidance of a subject the same thing as obsessing over it?

Suddenly, I wasn't sure.

"I think about _you_ all the time," he said in the same flat voice. "I watch you whenever it's safe to do so. But is that the same thing as love? You said it yourself—two people on a deserted island are bound to become attached."

Speaking of deserted islands, my mouth tasted like sand. I swallowed, wanting to assure him that we had something more than just a sense of loneliness appeased, but I hesitated.

He saw that hesitation. I knew it, and he knew it, and we both knew that this train of thought was far from being realized. This was a topic we had touched on many times but had never fully explored. During our last conversation I had told him that it was logical of me to fall for him given that he was my only lifeline in all the many worlds, but I hadn't wanted to pursue the implications of what that meant—that our supposed feelings for one another could potentially be hollow, or that I was deluding myself, that any other girl he picked could have fallen for him just like I had, or a whole host of other horrible things that swooped out of nowhere and—

I'm ashamed to admit that when he leaned forward and kissed me square across the lips, eyes showing more wild emotion than I had ever seen possess his aquiline face, I kissed him back like I was a drowning person and he was air. The kiss was by no means a chaste thing, but for some reason it did not strike me as sexual at all. It was exploratory and desperate, something borne out of a desire to understand without understanding in the slightest, a need to feel the truth for a brief instant then force it away so we wouldn't have to look at it again.

The kiss was a defense mechanism, a means through which we could shove an ugly possibility—not a truth, but a possibility—under a rug.

And shove that truth away we did, with more gusto than I thought possible under the circumstances. I got lost in him after that deed was done, ignoring the painful subject in favor of analyzing the way his mouth felt on mine, the taste and scent and _feel_ of him, unadulterated and pure, and the way his hair felt when I ran it between my fingers and the way his hands pressed into my back like he could force me inside his own skin, all cool heat and calm chaos and controlled madness and…

We pushed away after a while, arms still locked loose around each others' bodies, and we looked at one another for a long time. I was breathless; my lips stung.

"I don't get this at all," I somehow managed to force out. He licked his lips, fingers tightening on my arms. "I just… I can't figure this out."

"Likewise," was his panted response. He opened his mouth to say more.

And that was when company showed up.

"Dani?" said a harsh, insistent voice that cut through the dark like a spade. Mine and Koenma's heads whipped around in shock to find Hiei standing a few feet away, eyes searching for us in vain. I could tell he couldn't see us because those stunning eyes of his wouldn't focus in the dark, but I still felt a horrible chill creep over me as I pushed out of Koenma's embrace and stumbled backward.

_If Hiei sees me with another man_—I thought before thought became impossible, and the last things I saw before I felt my soul get sucked back into my body were Koenma's outstretched arms, arms that had been holding me a second before.

If the look of loss on his face was any indication, I could tell he had been reluctant to let me go.

* * *

I woke up in my bed with a blanket over my face, and with a gasp I struggled to sit up. The cloth fell away with a single swat from my hand and my eyes wildly combed through the dark, searching for Hiei since he had been there just a second before—

To my immense surprise, Hiei was nowhere to be found.

Brow furrowing on reflex, I flopped back down onto my bed with a stressed sigh. None of the boys stirred, the sounds of soft breathing letting me know that they were all asleep, and I, resigned, decided that it was probably wise to join them.

My pounding heart and whirling head, however, gave me no such luck. I couldn't quit thinking about Koenma, at the way we'd—

My cheeks went crimson as I burrowed beneath the covers, hand wandering to touch my lips. They no longer stung, but I couldn't help but wonder: How was this going to change our relationship? Was it going to change at all?

What were Koenma and I, anyway?

And not to mention, what did this bode in terms of me and _Hiei_?

What exactly did I feel for both of them, for that matter?

I pulled my knees to my chest with a groan, meaning to bury my face in them and try not to think about all the craziness I was willingly allowing to take over my life, and when I made that move I felt the bandages around my foot unravel with a pop. Sitting up, I tossed off my blanket and set about re-winding the strip of cloth, but when I did I realized that the sticky salve had dried into a crust on my skin.

_Just my luck—I have to dress my leg in the middle of the freaking night!_ I thought, and I scrambled about in the dark until I found my cane. I went into the bathroom as quietly as I could (Kurama stirred once or twice when I got up, but he either didn't care that I was sneaking off or didn't deem it important enough to discuss) and climbed down to the lower bath so I could rinse the dried salve off. I started humming under my breath as I did, trying not to focus on the ugly scabs and general grossness of that limb, and as I climbed the stairs back up I found myself starting to think about Koenma.

As was my long-practiced habit, I pushed the thoughts away. My humming grew louder in response.

I busied myself in hopes of keeping further thoughts at bay. I hopped up on the table, next to the medicine I hadn't bothered to take back into the sleeping room, and I reached into the box for my salve and bandages.

But I couldn't get the salve jar open.

"Must've screwed it on too tight," I muttered, struggling as my arms trembled from the strain of heaving at the stupid jar.

Given how absorbed I was in my task, it's not surprising that I jumped when Hiei said: "Let me do that."

I nearly dropped the stupid jar entirely, stifling a small cry of fear at the realization that I was not alone. Heart leaping, my eyes sought Hiei out. He was standing over by the sink area, the one that never stopped flowing and filled the room with the soft, crystalline chime of water on rock. Since the room was dim I couldn't make out his expression, just the lines of his body leaning on the wall and his flashing eyes, but he looked far more relaxed than I felt.

"I can manage," I said, tone more stiff that I had intended. Memories of my conversation with Koenma—not to mention Hiei's might-have-been-a-dream-but-I-can't-be-sure interruption; was he going to bring it up?—made it hard to speak with him normally.

_A firestorm_, Koenma had called him.

_He moves you._

I wasn't sure if that last thought was Koenma's, reworded, or my own.

"You can't," Hiei said, and before I knew it he was crossing the room with his hands in his pockets, head held high, footsteps falling in a way so unhurried it felt forced. Each step was a resolution, though of what I couldn't say, and I shrank back like a rabbit before a wolf. Soon the strange haze of warmth that seemed to follow him like a mantle passed over my spot, making tension start to melt out of my locked-up shoulders (this rabbit was easily pacified, it seemed), and he reached out and plucked the jar from my clutching hands. It took little more than a twist to open it, and I held out my hands to take the jar back.

"Thanks," I said, meeting his eyes with what I thought was unshakable conviction.

I immediately faltered.

Hiei, you see, was looking at me through lowered lashes, and with a rising sense of confused horror he dropped down on one knee.

_Holy fuck_, thought the half of me that didn't remember how Hiei spurned human traditions like the plague_. Fuck, is he—?_

But he wasn't doing something as out of place as proposing in the human manner, no matter what his down-on-one-knee-posture said. He reached up a hand and plucked a white cloth out of the wooden box at my side, and he carefully dipped it in the jar before setting the container on the ground. He grasped my ankle in one hand and place my foot's warped sole flat against his chest, right over where his heart lay hidden beneath his pectoral muscles. I couldn't move, I couldn't even _think_ as he carefully began spreading cool salve over my wounds, on-fire-by-contrast-fingers gliding nimble and soothing and sure and perfect and hot and—

The hand on my ankle distracted me as much as his fingers did, partially because his thumb kept tracing a maddeningly little circle around the ball-like bone on the inside of my ankle. My skin burned; I was sure I radiated nearly as much heat as he did right then. I couldn't help but stare at the top of his head, which was all I could see as he worked with a tenderness I never would have expected from my irate fire demon.

He finished with the salve and put the jar away, briefly rising so he could see inside the box to get the bandages. Only, he somehow managed to stand as close to me as humanly possible without actually touching me, aside from where his hand kept a loose circle on my ankle, of course, and suddenly I felt quite conscious of my loose t-shirt and baggy shorts and mussed, unbound hair. I looked a fright and I knew it, and Hiei—

"Say something if I hurt you," he murmured, shocking me back to the present as he knelt again.

"Would it even matter?"

I hadn't meant to say that aloud and I froze before he did, and then he looked up and our eyes met.

"What makes you say that?" he growled.

I had angered him; that much was plain to see. It took a minute for me to work up the ability to speak coherently, and when I did I said: "You didn't seem to care too much about hurting me earlier."

He glanced at my wrist, where the dark outline of a palm-print lay plainly visible against my paler skin.

"You angered me," he said simply, and he started to bandage up my leg.

I jerked my leg away from him; he wasn't expecting that and I somehow managed to dodge his grasping hands by swinging my legs atop the table. The bandage fluttered to the floor. I sat in profile, glaring down at him as I felt anger—white hot and searing and oh so very _real_—make my eyes narrow and my hands clench on the stone beneath me.

"That's no excuse for hurting someone, Hiei," I said with barely leashed rage. "And besides, what right do you have to hurt me if I make you mad? That's abuse. Do you understand what that means?"

He did not respond, staring up at me through narrowed eyes like I was speaking in tongues.

"And I wasn't talking about _that_ incident, anyway," I said, holding up my bruised wrist. His gaze tracked it as I spoke. "I was talking about when we were _outside_."

He rose the way a panther rises, right before it lunges for prey with bared teeth. "Outside?" he said, incredulousness plain to hear and see.

Rather than answer, I rolled up my shirtsleeve with a flick of the wrist. He'd grabbed me roughly when I had apologized to him, though not nearly bad enough to bruise, but as I had discovered when I'd changed into my pajamas, the skin there was still a little inflamed.

"Outside," I confirmed as his crimson eyes bore into my reddened skin. "Remember now?"

He didn't answer—he just stared.

"Frankly, Hiei," I said, sounding every bit as caustic as I felt, "I feel like I said my peace. I took care of my errors and apologized for them. Now I think it's your turn." I smiled with as many teeth as I could fit into the gesture. "Don't you?"

Really, his glare was a ferocious thing. Alas, he made no move to say a word, and that's when I realized that, considering my vantage point atop the table, I was taller than him. It was a power position.

I suddenly felt much more courageous than before.

"I'm going to be perfectly honest," I said, turning so I was facing him with my legs dangling over the side of the table again, and with a pang I realized that Hiei and I were sharing a very familiar conversation. "Hiei, you confuse the hell out of me. I don't understand you." I paused, staring into the dark as I thought about that. "Well, I _do_ understand you—most of the time." I looked back at him. "But today was weird, Hiei, and I don't know if you're doing it on purpose or what." I leveled a finger at his face. "Ever since I woke up after the river incident, you've made it your mission to dominate me at every opportunity."

To my satisfaction, recognition made his eyes spark. His throat moved when he swallowed.

_So I was right—he _was_ trying to dominate me_, I thought.

Then I thought: _But I have to wonder… why?_

"I hate to break it to you," I went on, trying to keep my tone firm and soft at once, "but being an overpowering-control-freak-jackass is not impressive or manly or whatever you seem to think it is—it's just confusing, and it's a little scary. And it's gotten to the point that you're asking me to change myself in order to obey you, but you _can't_ own me and I _can't_ be changed."

His back stiffened, eyes flashing in a way I can't describe. He had obviously taken offense at something I'd said, though your guess as to what that something _was_ is as good as mine.

"It scared me, Hiei," I said, dropping my voice to an even softer register so I wouldn't offend him again (a futile effort if there ever was one). "_You_ scared me."

If I had thought he was bristling before, what happened next took the cake. Lips pulled back over his teeth and his hands connected with the table on either side of my thighs with a smack, and his face loomed an inch in front of mine before I could so much as blink. Heat made my eyes dry out, then water and blink like they'd been stung.

"You _need_ to be scared, I think," he said, voice hissing whisper-soft across my face. I could see each lash and every pore in his smooth skin, he was so close, and he smelled like evergreen and char and metal and my body suddenly felt so _weak_—

I did what any sane person would have done at that point.

I smiled.

OK, so maybe that _wasn't_ what a sane person would have done under those circumstances, but considering all that I was putting myself through my sanity was pretty much up for grabs… ah, whatever. Point is, the smile was so unexpected that Hiei's glare broke in half, open-mouthed confusion making him appear for just a moment like a child. He jerked back, mouth closing into a frown that looked very much like an unintentional pout (though I'd never say as much to Hiei, sane or not).

"I'm going to get kind of vulnerable here," I said, trying to keep my voice from shaking, "so please don't make fun of me, OK?"

"Vulner…" he said, clearly not comprehending what I was saying at all. "Woman, what are—"

"I trust you," I said.

He froze.

"You frustrate me," I went on, keeping my tone as conversational as I could. "You're infuriatingly vague sometimes, but as much as that annoys me, I think I'd be deluding us both if I didn't mention that it intrigues me, too."

"I intrigue you?" Hiei repeated. He seemed stunned though he tried hard not to show it.

I nodded. "I want to figure you out!" I said, throwing up my hands in defeat. "Don't ask me to explain why—I just do. You say these weird things that I don't understand and I find myself thinking about them for days, just trying to make it all make sense. To make _you_ make sense."

I got a little too brave for my own good, I think: I leaned forward and placed my hand on Hiei's chest, pressing skin lightly into the fabric of his shirt until I could feel the rise and fall of his breathing. Heat made my palm tingle like it had fallen asleep. Hiei stared down at that hand for a long moment before looking at me, gaze sharp and unsure. I had used my bruised arm, I noticed, though I hadn't meant to.

"You've seen my past inside and out," I said. "You looked at my childhood and all the little things that shaped me into who I am today, and, call me crazy, but I feel like that's given you a bit of an advantage over me. You know what will drive me crazy and what will make me so mad I can't see straight, but you know what will make me happy, too." I chuckled. "You got under my skin, Hiei, but as hard as I try I can't seem to get under yours. I know next to nothing about your past," (although that wasn't necessarily true), "but even though you seem to guard it like it's some horrible thing, I don't think that knowing would change the way I feel about you. It would just make figuring you out a little easier." I smiled, hand fisting against his chest. "So I guess what I'm saying is that I wish you could open up and trust _me_, too. Give _and_ take. Get it?"

Leave it to Hiei to pick up and isolate the most awkward part of a conversation. "'The way you feel about me?'" he quoted, eyes dropping to a dangerous and sleepy half-mast. He took a step closer, making my elbow bend halfway, and one of his hands rose as if it were about to tuck my hair behind my ear.

"And in what way would that be?" he murmured, hand hovering beside my face.

"At the moment, in want of an apology," I said, nonplussed despite how hard my heart was hammering in my chest in response to his sudden closeness.

He scowled, hand dropping. "An apology for what?"

"How about the bruises, for starters?" I supplied. To his credit, he looked uncomfortable. "And then how about forcing me into becoming a total submissive outside?"

Shock made his eyes open wide. "A submissive?" he asked.

"Yeah. I feel like you browbeat me into taking more blame for our miscommunications than I deserve." Since this idea appeared to be news to Hiei, I extrapolated. "You're awfully closeted with your emotions, but no matter how bipolar I can be, not knowing how to read you can really limit how well I react to your moods. I mean, if I knew what you _wanted_ I could do it, but since you're never too clear with what you're thinking…" I shrugged. "I won't change myself to please you, of course. But if I knew that I was being a bitch, I'd try to stop."

I pinned him with a glare to deliver my final blow. "But," I said, "it takes two to tango, Hiei, and right now neither of us is dancing in rhythm."

We looked at one another for a few moments that dragged out into nearly a minute, and then Hiei's hand closed around my outstretched wrist; his fingers lined up with the marks on my skin, but this time he was gentle when he pulled my arm down and into my lap.

"Hold still," he said, and he dropped to one knee again so he could wrap up my leg. He was good at it, I noticed—probably because of the Black Dragon bindings he had to do so often.

_Wait_.

My fangirly tendencies reared their ugly heads at that moment, and in confusion I looked down at his hands—his right one in particular. Neither hand, to my unease, bore any sign of the Black Dragon tattoo or of the wrappings Hiei normally kept it in.

_What did _that_ mean?_ I wondered, but I had no way to find out since Hiei wasn't exactly candid about his unknown powers. _And why the hell didn't I think about this before? Has his arm been unwrapped this entire time or have I just not noticed?_

Hiei started by wrapping the cloth around the bridge of my foot, and then he worked his way up my ankle and around the lower half of my calf. He used a second bandage to bind up my toes and the skin right above them, tucking the cloth in on itself so it wouldn't slip. Even though my foot was unlike any other he had probably worked on, his work still managed to look much neater than mine, and the bindings exhibited just the right amount of pressure without being too tight. I made a study of his calloused hands as he worked, marking the short nails and tapered fingers and rough palms…

"I don't want to change you," he said suddenly, breath flowing over my leg when he spoke. Though he had finished treating me, he still held my foot pressed to his chest with one hand on my knee bare to keep it there. His hand burned into my bones, and for a second I was too distracted by the look of his caramel skin set against my own ivory flesh to respond.

"You what?" I managed, somehow.

"I don't want to change you," he repeated. "You said it felt like that was my intention. It wasn't."

"Then what was your intention?"

He looked up, lips pursed. "I am not," he said, "a gentle man."

"I figured that one out on my own, actually," I breathed. My voice came out in a rasp.

Eyes swept up the bare length of my leg. Gooseflesh broke out in their wake. "Are you a demon or a human?" Hiei asked, and his fingers tightened on my knee.

The question caught me on my blind side. "What?" I said, and Hiei's eyes locked on my face.

"Are you a demon or a human?" he said.

"A human," I said, not knowing why the hell it mattered.

His lips twitched. "You mean, you _think_ like a human," he said in a silky voice.

"I was raised human, if that's what you mean," I said.

"But you _feel_ like a demon," he said, and he sounded for a moment like he was in pain before he asked: "You don't know anything about demons, do you?"

I hesitated, biting my lip for a second. Hiei's eye flicked to my mouth when I did, and I quickly stopped.

"Not really," I said.

He kept staring at me, and soon the look's intensity made me so uncomfortable that I had to look away.

"I should be getting back to bed," I said, voice thick.

"Dani."

My spine tingled at the honey-dark sound of my name, a name whispered like a chant in the echoing room. I felt his hand alight on my arm before I looked to see what he was doing, and when I did I think I forgot to breathe.

"Demons," he said slowly as he pulled my bruised arm outward, "are not like humans."

"I think I got that memo," I breathed.

He tugged me forward a bit, doing it gently despite the claim that he was not a gentle man, so that my wrist was on level with his lowered face. His hand slipped downward, fingers twining into mine so my palm pressed against the back of his hand. His rough thumb traced the line of my index finger.

"We think differently," he said, face inching forward even as he held our eyes together. "We act on instinct, especially when in situations…" Eyes glittered; lips moved; his voice shuddered up my spine.

"Especially in situations… like ours."

He chuckled at my shocked expression. _Situations like ours_? I thought, and my question must have been plain on my face because he chuckled again.

"Humans think far too much," he said, smirking.

"So you're saying I think too much?" I said.

"Yes," he said, and his eyes fluttered closed. I watched, fascinated, as he placed his open mouth over the blackening bruise and breathed on it just as his lips connected with my skin.

My pulse, that traitorous and uncontrollable thing, began to sprint, and then I felt his tongue press lightly against my flesh. Air hitched in my lungs, diaphragm going paralytic as he swept his tongue—hotter than anything _ever_—over my bruise in a scalding scrape that didn't make me want to flinch away at all, and then he pulled back.

"I am not a healer," he murmured as my skin tingled from the lack of contact. Though my arm felt uncommonly hot, the rest of me started to shiver. Hiei watched with obvious satisfaction as I remembered that breathing was a good thing and gasped, lightheaded and dizzy.

"But heat," he explained, "can soothe as well as hurt."

"Oh," I said, and he pressed his mouth to my skin again. "Oh," I repeated, and he licked my bruise for the second time. The animalistic nature of his actions suited Hiei, oddly, and they made him look like a lazy jungle cat indulging in something as innocent as it was full of calculated sensuality. "Oh. OK. Oh."

He chuckled again, but he kept on going.

"I'm fixing what I broke," he murmured at one point. I'm not sure when. I kind of lost track of time during his unorthodox treatment. "That's what I'm supposed to do, aren't I?"

"Ideally," I said, voice squeaking. Hiei breathed against me and smiled, lips curving against my trembling skin, and he turned over my arm so he could get at the underside. The skin was even thinner over my veins, and his efforts there were too much for me to bear as his mouth dragged over me in waves.

It was _almost_ too much, that is. I wasn't exactly complaining at that point.

The end came too soon but too slowly at the same time, but when he stood up (I felt him stand because I had squeezed my eyes shut as I tried not to gasp or beg or something equally embarrassing) he did not let go of my hand. I wondered what to do until I felt warm fingers on my upper arm, and then the sleeve of my t-shirt got pushed out of the way and I felt him bend so he could place his mouth against the red mark there.

"You don't have to—" I tried to say, but words failed me when teeth pricked my skin in a warning punctuated by a rumbling growl. I'd forgotten about his preternaturally sharp eyeteeth as I let him soothe my skin the way he wanted, one half of my brain screaming at me that this was so awkward, _what the hell are you letting him do to you, Dani?,_ and the other half whispering that this wasn't so bad, now was it?, _if he's this good with his mouth on your arm imagine what a kiss—_

_That's dangerous_, said the last rational part of my brain to survive Hiei's slow assault. _Don't even go there._

He switched to my other arm after that, but I didn't once open my eyes as he pushed up my shirt sleeve, wordless, and make my skin catch fire beneath his lips and teeth and tongue. When he finished I thought he'd just pull away and be done with it, leaving me in a puddle of confused goo, but instead he just stood there, one hand twined in mine with the other resting atop my knee.

I jumped when he leaned forward and pressed his face against the side of my neck, and my eyes flew open.

"I'm not hurt there!" I yelped. I was sure he could feel the pulse pounding in my neck; surely it was visible beneath my pale skin, an undulating flag of declaration and want.

"I know," he said, but despite my worries he didn't kiss me or anything—he just sat there. The hairs on the back of my neck rose as his breath fanned over my winding veins and shallowly breathing throat, waves of heat that left me cold and wanting another rush to warm me back up. I felt myself relax in spite of myself, and my thoughts on just what the _heck_ he was doing bled away, until…

"Who were you dreaming about?" he said at last.

_Who was I…?_

I stiffened, and my free hand came up on reflex to land on Hiei's chest. He did not resist when I pushed him to arm's length and stared at him, swallowing to regain composure. He, unlike me, seemed totally at ease—bored, even.

_Koenma,_ I thought. _Oh god, what am I doing in here with Hiei when Koenma—_

_His love is doomed,_ said my realistic side. _Forget him. Hiei's here in flesh and blood, and you admitted it to yourself that you like him…_

The voice took on a wicked nature.

…_I think you like him just as much as you like Koenma, if your quivery reaction to this little taste was any indication. Don't torture yourself by pining for the impossible. _

_Firestorm_… I though as I stared at Hiei's jewel-bright eyes.

_But you can't just forget Koenma and go for someone else like that!_ said another voice. _So what if Koenma is doomed? Just live with him in your dreams and be content with that! Where is your loyalty, Dani?_

_But that's not fair to Dani,_ said the first voice.

_And going for Hiei wouldn't be fair for Koenma_, said the second.

My breath came in a gasp and I felt words start to bubble in my chest. I had no idea what they were before I said them.

"I was dreaming of someone," I said with a shaking voice, "who can't give—"

"Dani? Hiei? Izzat you two in there?"

I flinched so hard that Hiei jerked away in surprise, crossing the room in an instant that left me feeling icy and more alone than ever. Kuwabara stood in the doorway looking sleepy, and when he finished rubbing his eyes with a fist he glanced between Hiei and me in confusion.

"What are you two doing in here?" he asked, happy suspicion coloring every word.

I took the lead on that one. "My bandages fell off and Hiei helped me put them back on," I said, voice sounding breathy and totally incriminating, and I glanced at the fire apparition for backup. Slowly, he nodded in confirmation.

"Oh. OK. Cool," said Kuwabara, and he walked toward the toilets. "Be back in a bit."

The door shut behind him, and Hiei and I made eye contact.

"I should go back to bed," I said, looking away first.

I heard him clear his throat. "Perhaps you should," he said, and he began to walk out of the room toward the bathing pools. I glanced up to surreptitiously stare at his retreating back, but when he reached the doorway he stopped, turned, and pinned me with his eyes.

"Are you a demon or a human, Dani?" he asked. Before I could reply, he said: "Your body reacts to mine the way a demon's would."

I swallowed. "Oh."

A smirk. "'Oh,' indeed," he said.

He walked out.

* * *

When I went back to bed I tossed and turned and tried not to think about the unfairness of it all—my attraction to Koenma wasn't fair to Hiei, my attraction to Hiei wasn't fair to Koenma, and the fact that I couldn't just have them both and be done with it wasn't fair to anyone.

The fact that I couldn't stop caring for someone who was doomed to die…

Well, it definitely wasn't fair to me.

I won't cover up the fact that I cried small, silent tears into my wrist, where the marks of Hiei's hand were already fading and his scent—the subtle aromas of char, evergreen, and metal—lingered strong and true enough to follow me even into my ordinary dreams.

* * *

The Sisters came for us after we had woken up and taken breakfast, once again provided by the under-cover culinary genius Kuwabara. I also shifted my face back to my mother's as the guys looked on with equal parts horror and interest. Hiei joined us around the fire and food, giving no sign that he wanted to further discuss the events of the night before (though he didn't seem to like it when my face changed if his scowl was any indication), and I was perfectly fine with that, thanks so much.

He did, however, get protective when the Sister-sized door opened to reveal Karla standing there in her long brown robe. In a flash he had crossed to my side, one arm in front of me as if to hold me back from the huge woman.

"Karla's friendly, Hiei," I said, patting his shoulder in what I hoped looked like a casual gesture, and I pushed past him so I could go to her. He glared, but knew better than to protest in front of a Sister.

"Hey! Good morning!" I called in English. "Long time, no see!"

She glanced at my foot when I stopped a few yards away. "You bound that up very well," she complimented, and I jerked my head at the boys.

"The one with the red eyes did it for me," I said, opting for a description because I figured she wouldn't care about learning their names.

"So they're actually useful!" she said, face showing genuine surprise followed by quick remorse. "I apologize—I am unused to dealing with men-keeping Sisters, as we have so few among us. I wasn't expecting them to be able to do much more than fight and provide you pleasure."

I tried not to blush at the thought, and at the sudden memory of Hiei's lips on my arm. "The tall one with the copper hair is an excellent cook, and the red-haired one is a healer," I said, eager to defend them.

Her eyes widened, then narrowed with a smile. "Such wisdom, to amass followers of talent," she said. "And the black haired youth?"

She meant Yusuke, but given that I couldn't immediately think of him in any other way besides being a beast of a fighter, I just went for: "Comic relief."

Her guffaw was as loud as an erupting volcano, and when she stopped chuckling she wiped a tear of mirth from her cheek. "You are funny!"

"I try," I said. I fidgeted, nerves getting the best of me. "Oh, um, so, we're going back to the city today?"

"To the musicians to share in your craft," she clarified, "as per the request of the Grand Mother."

"Perfect," I said. "I have an instrument in my belongings—can I bring it or should I play the way I did for the Grand Mother?"

"You shall do both!" she chirped—the sound seemed weird coming from someone so huge. As I turned to go, however, she laid her massive hand on my shoulder with a feather-light touch. "I have something for you," she said, and from a pocket in her robe she pulled an object that, at first, seemed innocent enough.

When I recognized it, however, I felt my blood run cold.

My skin crawled across my back in a flurry of little twitches. "Where did you get this?" I said in a shaking whisper, and my fingers rose to touch the… the _thing_. I couldn't bring myself to caress the cold steel, though, and I noticed that my hands were shaking.

Karla's jade-green face darkened in confusion. "All men wear them when they visit the island," she said, and she forced an exact replica of Seishou's metal mask into my numb hands. "You'll take one man with you for protection today, yes?"

* * *

_NOTES:_

_A 10,000 word chapter to commemorate the big 4-5! WOOT!_

_Before I say anything else, Misuzu-PM has made a comic out of one of my other stories, Fakes & Fiends! The plan is that it will be posted tomorrow sometime, and I will have a link on my profile for anyone who wants to read. Please shower her with love and wonderment! YAY! I am incredibly grateful to her for doing this for me; I know it must have taken a ton of work. THANK YOU, MISUZU!_

_On to chapter-specific-notes. The kiss with Koenma was not planned—the rest of the scene was planned, but not the kissing part. It just came up on its own. Still, I kind of think it fits because Dani needed to muddy up her relationship with him a bit. It was far too clear/simple/bland for my dramatic tastes. But please, don't hate me for it too much._

_And now you all know that Hiei can't get away with bullying Dani without getting some sort of talking to or guilt trip in return. See, you doubters? Lol! So many of you expressed concern/worry/anger over last chapter… (*sigh*) I'm not totally dumb. Most of the time. XD_

_Also, um… massive-ass Hiei moment. MASSIVE. ASS. HIEI. MOMENT. Like, biggest one ever? Maybe. My first draft had Dani yelling at him hardcore, but then her softer reprimands just… made more sense? Especially after Koenma buttered her up a bit._

_Demon relationships vs. human relationships. What was that about? More to come! The issue basically defines the rest of the HieixDani thing… you've been warned._

_And now things are REALLY down to the wire between Koenma and Hiei. More emphasis on this to come._

_I've had several inquires along the lines of "Where the hell is Puu?" over the past few chapters. Just wanted to address that yes, I know what I'm doing with him, and no, he hasn't been forgotten. Hang tight til his glory moment comes! _

_Also, Dear Anonymous Reviewer Who Left No Name Or Email: You're right, Mexico is technically in North America. However, Dani isn't particularly good at geography, and she lumped it in with Central America. Whoops! She also ball-parked the distance estimation between Alabama and Illinois, hence the inaccuracies with the miles/kilometers conversion. I don't know anyone who can make those conversions without a calculator! Leave an email next time so I can reach you in person!_

_And to Song Suggestor/Miss Mercury Blue: That's a great song! =D I like it a lot, and thanks for bringing it up. I probably will attempt to work it in somewhere, because I agree that it seems to suit them. ^^Especially in a moment I have planned… but I've said too much!_

_And just what the HELL does that mask mean for our heroes? _

_If I changed my penname to, say, Graphospasmsaurus, would you hate me for forever? For the LOL factor, there's a poll on my profile._

_Many, many thanks to all of you who wished my grandmother, Nana, well after the last chapter. I told her about the influx of positive feeling and she basically glowed and told me to tell you all that she's a big believer in the power of positive thought, and that she's sure you all helped her get through this with your kindness. I can't tell you how much better all of you made me, and more importantly, HER feel. Many thanks to: Kai-Chan94, Kaiya's Watergarden, Dragon of Twilight, Doily Rox, Supreme Baka, Reclun, Naitza-Kururugi, Misuzu-PM, chocolateluvr13, AkaMizu-chan, j.d.y., Masuyo Shun, Mihakuu, 0nfateswings, WorldsAngel, Koryu Elric, Angel of Randomosity, yumchaitea, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, colbub, dude where's my spirit gun, destinyswindow, Fuurai, SillyGoddessDisco, AlyssHeart71, itsallaboutbob, Foxgirl Ray, darkravensnight, Mel, TallyYoungBlood, Ry171819, Heart's Icy Touch, StrawberryxXxKisses, XAuda RoseX, LupinePhyre909, DevilAngelWolf27, Katt Jeane, Yanza, Alady, DaAmazingMeepers, rain chant, Song Suggestion, etowa-ru, ShadowFireFox13, and Bijouie!_


	46. Chapter 46: To the Sky

This has been posted early because I have to go to bed early; I have finals in the morning. Boo-yah!

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 46:

"To the Sky"

* * *

When I turned around with the mask held before me like a shield, all I could manage to say was: "Look familiar?"

A beat, and then:

Yusuke's jaw dropped as he stumbled back so he could point at the hateful thing, face morphed into a skin of fear and confusion so overblown it was almost deformed. "T-that's the Seishou mask!" he yelped, voice cracking on the final syllables.

Suddenly, Karla started to laugh. I looked back at her in surprise, and she was staring at Yusuke through amused black eyes.

"He _is_ comic relief!" she crowed.

Yusuke—still leaning back and pointing dramatically—went from looking crazed to peeved in a second. "Why do I feel like I was just insulted?" he said, and he held the stupid pose until I breathed a sigh and reached out to lower his arm myself.

"She just said you really were funny," I said. When Yusuke looked confused, I shook my head to clear the logical cobwebs. I had spoken to Karla in English; duh! "I told her you were the joker of the group when she asked what you guys were like."

Kuwabara's interest was piqued. "What did you say about _me_?" he asked.

"I said you're ace cook without whom we would starve to death," and then I added because that didn't seem cool enough: "and a fighter worth taking a second look at." I glanced at Kurama as Kuwabara grinned and gloated at his roles, which he obviously thought were superior to Yusuke's. "Just to speed this up, I called _you_ a healer and Hiei got called out on wrapping up my foot for me. That's what started the conversation in the first place_, but what the hell are we going to do about this mask, guys?"_

Kurama had put on his serious face. "It seems our friend Seishou has a history with our hosts," he said in a silky voice. "That makes both Ryu _and_ Seishou likely to be in the vicinity. Interesting."

A horrible thought occurred. "You don't think they're _both_ working for the _Sisters_, do you?" I whispered.

"It is possible, though it seems unlikely," Kurama murmured back. "The Sisters are too self-contained to harbor ill-will toward the Spirit World, and I don't see why they would send inferior men to do their dirty work. No, this reeks of a deeper plot."

"The only question is what that stench bodes for us," Hiei said. He kept glancing at Karla like he was about ready to wring her neck with his bare hands, and when he caught my eye I gave him a warning look.

_Behave_, I thought at him, and when his eyes flickered to my mouth I couldn't help but blush and look away.

"Elaina?" Karla called, and I jumped. She was staring our way in confusion. "Why haven't you picked your man yet?"

_Isn't that the question of the century?_ I thought sourly, and I said: "None of them wish to be apart from me." The words made me blush, of course, and I guess my words must have implied something I did not mean because Karla started smiling a small, sly smile in my direction.

"It is good they wish to stay near you," she teased. "I'm sure you provide much… incentive."

It nearly killed me to reply in the affirmative (her innuendos weren't exactly subtle), and then I looked back to the guys. "Listen, we don't have much time," I hissed. "She wants me to take one of you with me into the city—that's what the mask is for. One of you has to wear it."

Predictably, Hiei jumped at the bait. "I'll go," he said as he held out his hand for the mask, but I could see distaste in his eyes when he stared at the metal artifact. He thought it was demeaning to wear it—that much was obvious.

Luckily, he wasn't the only taker. "No," said Kurama. "I'll go."

Hiei's eyes flashed. "Kurama—"

"I could observe more than you if I had the opportunity," Kurama said in simple terms. "And besides, your stakes in this would be more—" his eyes flicked to me "—_personal_, and that could jeopardize our place among these people."

I had no time to feel embarrassed by that totally unsubtle jab at mine and Hiei's weird relationship because my thoughts were interrupted when I heard a smack. Yusuke had pounded his fist into his open palm and was grinning from ear to ear.

"Let me take this one, guys," he said in a way that was both lazy and self-satisfied at once. "It's about time I earned my keep."

"No," said Hiei, jaw clenching tight as his fingers shot out and grasped Yusuke's wrist. "This is _my_ task."

But Yusuke, far from seeming intimidated, just rolled his eyes and shook Hiei off. "You pissed 'em off pretty bad last time, shorty—two of them were out for your blood, remember? Do you really think they'll be happy to see you again so soon?"

To my surprise, Hiei could only grit his teeth and glare. I remembered with a start that no one had ever given me a blow-by-blow account of the events after my disappearance with the Sisters, and I resolved to ask for one when I got back later.

Kurama looked thoughtful at Yusuke's words. "I made a bad impression, as well, when I took a Sister hostage during our first fight," he mused. Eyes went my way. "Looks like I'm not a good choice, either."

The spirit detective laughed in triumph. "Hey, and I made a pretty _good_ impression on the girls when I held Hiei back and stuff, so I just make more sense." He shot me a thumbs-up sign. "So whaddaya say, Dani? Can I be your date to the prom?"

My lip split into a grin as I snorted in laughter. "Sure. Just remember that I don't kiss on the first date."

It was his turn to laugh (and Hiei's turn to shoot me a shocked look). "I'll be a gentleman," he said.

"Then it's settled," I said before handing him the mask, which he put to his face. Brown eyes blinked owlishly out of almond-shaped holes. His voice was muffled when he said: "How do I look?"

"Like a million dollars," I said.

"Be sure to watch for other men in the area," Kurama said, garnering a nod from Yusuke, and he opened his mouth to say more when Kuwabara spoke up.

"Gimme that. _I'm_ going," he said, black eyes narrowed into an intense expression, and he snatched the mask from Yusuke.

"Very funny, Kuwabara," Yusuke griped, and they started to tussle for the mask.

"I'm not kidding, Urameshi!" he snapped, defending his prize with his life. "Remember who's on this island?"

I didn't see how the question related, but Kurama's eyes went buggy when he had a light-bulb moment. "Give the mask to Kuwabara, Yusuke," Kurama said slowly. Yusuke blanched, Kuwabara smiled smugly, and Hiei looked like he was about to wring the fox demon's neck.

"Am I missing something?" I asked slowly, and Kuwabara sighed.

"Think about it," he said. "You remember who you ran into earlier?" When I just gave him a blank stare, he added: "You know, blue skin, white hair, buddy to a certain psychic we're after?"

I raised an eyebrow. "You mean Ho—"

"Don't say that name in present company, Dani," said Kurama. I did my best not to look at Karla. "Kuwabara is right. Yusuke and Hiei both dealt with _her_," it was clear he meant Hogosha, "in close quarters, and she may recognize them from that encounter if they see her again. Kuwabara and I are the logical choices if we want to remain undiscovered, but I am not on the Sisters' good side. Kuwabara is the only choice."

Kuwabara's face lit up. "Yeah, not to mention that one of the Sisters gave me some salve for my head when she hit me, so I think I'm kind of well-liked." He jammed the mask on over his face and used its heretofore unseen leather strap to secure it in place. "Let's go!"

"Be careful, and remember your questions," Kurama said.

"Yeah, good luck!" Yusuke said, and I offered them all a smile.

"We'll be fine," I said. "Stay out of trouble while we're gone."

"Of course," Kurama said, and I nodded at him before waving at Yusuke.

Hiei turned away before I got to say goodbye.

* * *

Karla did not offer to carry me to the Riders waiting outside, content to lead Kuwabara and I out of the house at a distance of about fifteen feet (she probably didn't want to get too near the man at my side, was my opinion). This, of course, gave me the opportunity to talk to Kuwabara in relative privacy.

"Kuwabara?" I asked under my breath when we stepped outside. Karla was walking down to the beach with a spring in her gigantic step. I could make out the twitching shapes of at least six squirrel riders standing at the water's edge.

"Yeah Dani?" he replied, and I grimaced.

"I'm 'Elaina' to the Sisters," I reminded him.

I couldn't see his face behind the mask, but he sounded apologetic. "Oops."

"No problem. But are you sure you're OK with going out here? I know the Sisters are… intimidating."

He gave me a thumbs-up sign; his voice, when he spoke, came out muffled. "I've wanted to get off this island for forever," he told me. "I'm lucky I got picked."

By then we had cleared a good expanse of ground, but apparently we hadn't moved fast enough because the Riders started toward us, squirrelly feet pounding over the pebbly ground and scattering rocks in all directions. The six of them—the same platoon led by Krishna, in fact—surrounded us in a furry circle, and Kuwabara visibly tensed beneath the lines of his windbreaker jacket.

"We are your escorts again today," Krishna boomed. The plumes on her helmet waved like battle standards, but her all-black eyes were warm. "Good to see you, Elaina."

"Likewise." I bobbed my head in greeting as Karla swung into the saddle of one of the other riders—Sarka, I noticed, who was grinning at me like a devil as her myriad of piercings glittered in the watery grey light above.

"I'm not carrying the man," she said, tipping me a wink as she and Karla bounded off on their mount's back.

The other riders fell to bickering, and before I knew it Krishna had scooped me up and placed me in the saddle before her. My hands scrambled for the reins she had given me the last time I rode with her, and I looked down to Kuwabara and said: "Be good, OK?"

"Don't have to tell me twice," he cheerfully replied, and the riders started playing a very heated (and violent) game of rock-paper-scissors (more like punch-slap-stab, if you asked me) to decide who had man-carrying duty. I didn't get to see the winner, however, because Krishna wheeled our squirrel around and headed for the huge tower of rock next to the bath house.

However, we only got halfway there when Krishna let out a growl and slammed our squirrel to a stop. Before I knew what was happening I saw the air a dozen feet ahead of us blur black, then solidify…

"_Him_!" Krishna growled.

…it solidified into none other than Hiei, who stood before us looking bored with his hands jammed into his pockets.

His eyes, however, blazed. I forgot to breathe for a second, but Krishna's presence at my back brought me to reality quick enough.

"Hiei? What are you doing here?" I managed to snap—I tried to sound authoritative, as I knew Krishna would expect of me, but I got the feeling that I just sounded flustered. To the still-bristling Krishna, I said: "It's OK; he's one of mine."

Her jaw pulsed as she clenched it. "He nearly killed three of our Sisters. I trust you punished him well for that?" She did not let me reply. "Not well enough, it seems, since he can still _walk_."

I had to work hard to keep from going pale. "I'll remedy that as soon as I get home later," I assured her, and her hard look turned into a smirk.

"I trust that you will, for your Sisters' sake," she said, and I looked back to Hiei.

His scowl was as dark as his hair. "You forgot this," he said, and that's when I saw the ukulele tucked under his left arm.

"Thank you," I managed, and he walked—very slowly and carefully, keeping his eyes locked on the glaring Krishna—to the squirrel's side. He handed the ukulele up to me with a lazy sweep of his arm, and when I took it and started to pull away his hand caught me by the wrist.

"Don't get killed," he said, voice softer than usual as he stared up at me with those _eyes_ of his, and my face flushed. Fingers tightened on my wrist, and I could feel the heat of him even through the material of my red thermal shirt.

"Go back to the house, Hiei," I said, pulling away, and to my horror he actually took the time to smirk up at Krishna before disappearing with another blur of black.

"He toys with you," Krishna remarked, and her voice held a small level of accusation.

"He is the hardest of my men to control," I said, trying to keep my cool under the face of her scrutiny, and I tried to salvage the situation the only way I knew how. "I… enjoy the challenge he poses. Most of the time."

The squirrel began to walk again under her command. "Most of the time?"

I fought a smile at the sound of the following understatement: "He has proven rebellious. I think he enjoys the chase as much as I do."

She was quiet for a few paces. "He fought viciously when we took you," came her soft reply. "For all the trouble he represents, he is a good find. I merely wish he would learn his place more fully in future. It reflects badly on you when he misbehaves."

I sighed, trying to sound tragic in the process, and I decided to play up my ignorance. "My mother died before she finished teaching me all the ways of the Sisters," I said, morose. "I hope to learn from the other Sisters the ways I don't yet know."

"All beginners are afforded some free mistakes," she said by way of comfort, and we reached the rock. This time I was ready for a vertical climb; I didn't yelp or gasp even once as we scaled the stone and crested its top.

The view was incredible, by the way. The lake caught the grey light above and turned the air into a curtain of lead-colored diamond dust, and with a frown I realized that you could see straight down into the open-air bath from the top of the tall rock. The two pools scintillated in the light of day, silver disks that would be easy to spy on from this vantage point if you had eyes that could see that far.

_I need to make sure Hiei is inside next time I take a bath,_ I thought when I recalled how his eyes seemed to miss nothing, and then the squirrel jumped up and launched itself into the air. The bottom fell out of my stomach as we soared over the billowing steam clouds above the lake, but Krishna was holding on to me and I did not feel threatened at all, and when we landed I anxiously craned my head to look for Kuwabara.

"Your man is safe," Krishna said in a quiet voice, "though I do not see why you should care so much for him."

I didn't have time to answer, because out of the mists came a flying squirrel. Kuwabara was not on it, and I waited with held breath as the rest of the squirrels barreled to this side of the lake. The last one held my friend, thank the higher powers: he was sitting in the saddle behind the rider with a foot of awkward space between their bodies, and when they touched ground he jumped off of his own accord and jogged over to Krishna and I.

"You OK?" I asked.

Though his head hardly reached the squirrels shoulders, he still managed to make the squirrel shy back a few steps.

"Sorry, squirrely!" he said, holding up his hands and approaching at a slower pace (Krishna, to my surprise, made a pleased sound in the depths of her throat). When the beast calmed down he said: "I'll never get over flying that high; it's scary!"

I laughed before looking up at Krishna. "Where to now?" I said.

"The town meeting hall," she said, and we started walking. Kuwabara jogged along at the squirrel's side since riding wasn't an option (men didn't get that privilege), and we crossed the rocky shore before finding our way onto the city's cobbled streets. Many blue and green women stopped to wave and give tokens of food to the riders; most gawked at Kuwabara while giving him a wide berth, and one of the bolder ones managed to walk past him to force a garland of strange pink flowers into my hands with a deep blue blush on her aquamarine skin. After I thanked her I asked Krishna if it was OK to wear the flowers in my hair.

"That's what they're for," she said, amused as I put the wreath atop my head like a crown. "They symbolize welcome and purity. They become you."

"Thanks," I said, grinning, and she chuckled.

"As I said last time, you're an easy one to please." Eyes locked on something in the distance. "Ah. We're almost here."

The street we had been on terminated into a square courtyard, one that was about two hundred feet across. Buildings lined the edges of the courtyard, and across the way from us stood a stage constructed from black stone with a rough texture—volcanic rock, maybe? On another side of the courtyard stood a stone building nearly five stories tall and at least two hundred feet wide; a real monolith of a structure with a wooden roof, many tall windows paned with rippled, tinted glass, and a stone door that was thrown wide open.

The riders came to a halt outside of the aforementioned building, much to the joy of the other Sisters who crowded close to speak to them. Krishna handed me down into Karla's waiting arms but made no move to dismount on her own.

"We will be back later to escort you back to your quarters, Elaina," said Krishna. "But before that, play with our own musicians, and then do us the honor of attending an announcement of the Grand Mother's. "

"Is it about the Hunt?" I asked, hoping to fish for information, but Krishna just smiled and patted my be-flowered head.

"You shall see," was her cryptic response, and she moved off. The other riders saw this and scrambled to follow after, and the Sisters who had been speaking with them began to disperse.

* * *

Karla allowed me to walk up to the big building on my own feet, but just before we entered she stopped us cold. Kuwabara collided with my back with an 'oomph' before putting his hands on my shoulders to steady me. He had nearly knocked my body off balance.

"Your man may come inside, but he is not to speak or move unless instructed by yourself," Karla told me. "There is a curtained chamber just inside the door, where all men wait until it is time to leave. He must go there. You will tell him this?"

"Of course," I said, and I did. Kuwabara didn't look to happy at the prospect of segregation, but since there was little else to do he took the news gamely enough. Then the three of us walked into the darkness inside, and as my eyes adjusted I took stock of my surroundings, not that there was much there to take in. The ceiling rose up to unknown heights and many smokeless torches provided light to see by, but otherwise the place lacked any form of decoration or pizzazz besides the furs tossed about on the floor. A corner had been roped off by tall curtains made of grey cloth, and I caught Kuwabara's eye before jerking my head toward it. He remembered not to speak, choosing to shoot me an OK sign with his hand instead, and as I watched him jog off Karla said: "That one is obedient and attentive. I like him."

"Me too," I said, smiling as he disappeared past the curtain. I put on a brave face and asked: "What now?"

"Now, you play," she said, and she led me over to one of the many fur cushions in the center of the floor. Before I sat down, however, she made a small mound out of them so I'd be comfortable.

"Thanks," I said when I sat down, and the sound of footsteps made my head turn toward the door.

"Small Sister!" said one of the three women to enter the room. She was a big one with fat arms and long fingers, clad in a black robe and a severe bun of hair. Frankly, she looked like a frumpy—yet jolly—librarian. "How wonderful to finally meet you! I am Enich, master of the musicians. Do me the honor of playing with us this day!"

The two behind her—young ones with pale blue skin, matching black braids, and similar features; they were obviously twins—shook their heads as if they were embarrassed by Enich's exuberance. One carried a big stringed instrument that looked like a cross between a banjo and a guitar, and the other carried a huge circular drum balanced atop her head. Atop _that_ was a woven basket full of who-knows-what.

Enich stopped walking a few feet from me and dipped a graceful bow. "These are my star pupils, Oni and Umi," she said as she bade the girls sit down. We formed a loose semi-circle on the ground when Enich joined us. "We have brought instruments with us, though given your small size I fear they will be too big for you to handle properly."

I held out the ukulele and smiled. "Will this help?"

"Yes!" Enich said, excitement lighting up her black eyes. Her deep blue skin was lighter on the pads of her fingers—I noticed when she reached out and ran a finger down the ukulele's strings. "So tiny, even in your hands. What is its range?"

I cracked off a few scales to show her what it was capable of, and her lips pursed.

"A strumming instrument, then," she said, and she held one hand out. Oni—or was it Umi?—reached into the basket she carried and removed a wooden flute, and with care she placed it in the older Sister's hand. "Match me."

I didn't know what to expect when she raised the flute to her lips, but it wasn't what actually happened, that's for sure. The flute had a massive range of tones, fitting amongst the high ones as easily as it thrummed through the low notes, and Enich began to play a complicated melody that rippled and twisted in on itself like a whirlpool in full flow. It sounded random, at first, because she kept changing keys and changing tempos seemingly on a whim. She played for nearly two minutes by the time I started to recognize patterns that were hardly patterns at all, and when I saw the relationships form between key and pitch and tempo and octave I hastily began to strum out a complimentary strain on the ukulele. Enich's eyes glittered happily above the flute as she watched my hands work, and we went through two rotations of the song before she signaled that we should stop.

"For one who does not know that tune, you did very well," she said. "It is complex."

"It's beautiful," I told her.

Pride made her features glow. "It should be because I made it!" she said, nodding in agreement with herself, and then she gestured to the twins. One of them positioned the huge drum between her knees while the other held her banjo-slash-guitar at the ready. "You two, play a song for our guest. And Small Sister, join in when you can."

We passed several hours in this manner, but to my music-high brain it felt like mere moments. Though none of us discussed ourselves or socialized beyond the 'hello's of our earlier greeting, we got along swimmingly. Music is the same in every culture—attractive, calming, and connecting. We fell into easy kinship thanks to our shared love of music and what it stood for, and for the first time in a long time I felt myself grow utterly relaxed.

_I missed this so much,_ I thought as I felt my fingers smart and burn against the ukulele. _I can't believe I haven't played with someone in so long._

Karla—I hadn't noticed her leave—brought us food after a while, and it was during this break that I finally had the time and the thought to bring up Kurama's list of questions. I was in the middle of wondering just how in the world I was supposed to go about asking them when Oni (or Umi) provided exactly what I needed.

"Sister Elaina?" she asked. I was in the middle of taking a drink from an over-sized wooden cup and raised my eyebrows at her over the edge of it. "May I ask you a question? It's about… well, it's about your men."

"Yes, I have been wondering about this too," said the other twin, and the girls exchanged glances.

"How does _it_… well, how does it _work_?" asked the first twin, blushing a little across the nose and cheeks.

I spat my water back into the cup on reflex. "What?" I sputtered, wiping at my mouth.

"Oh!" said the twins at once, sharing a mortified look. "That came out wrong!"

"I don't mean the sex act itself," said the first.

The second continued with: "We know how _that_ works—"

"—what I want to know is how your _children_ happen," the first concluded.

Karla, who had been sitting with us for the duration of our meal, perked up. "I have been wondering that as well," she said. "As a healer, I can't help but be curious."

Enich looked like she wanted to sink into the floor. "Forgive them," she mumbled, placing a hand over her pudgy face. "They are young and inexperienced."

"It's all right," I assured her, and Umi and Oni looked relieved. Karla just looked eager. "Well, I'm not a doctor, but I'll explain this as best I can…"

I'll spare _you_ the details of that explanation, however. Let's just say that they were very curious about the biology involved in producing a child with a man, things like periods and ovulation and DNA and genetics seeming to be new concepts for my audience, and when I was done telling them about how a child of a man and a woman inherited traits from _both_ parents, they were staring at me in halfway horrified awe.

"How odd," Karla muttered to herself, a hand on her chin as she took it all in. "How very, very irregular."

"You mean it's not the same for you?" I fished, and all the women shook their heads.

"Your mother did not explain this, I take it?" Karla asked, and when the others looked confused by this she said: "Oh, Elaina's mother was one of our Sisters, though not by blood. She raised Elaina far away from us, but she died before Elaina could learn all of our ways."

"Forgive my ignorance," I said, and everyone smiled.

"It's quite fine," Enich said. She looked at Karla. "I feel our healer could explain this best."

"I shall try," Karla said, and she took a deep breath before speaking next. "Parts of your reproductive process are like ours, but there are no men of our specie. Did you mother tell you that?"

I nodded, suppressing a triumphant smirk. _Kurama thought as much,_ I thought, _and he looks like a girl so I guess that's not really a lie…_ "I don't know much else, though," I said, and she nodded.

"I suppose she didn't find it relevant since you are not of our specie," Karla mused. "I suppose she didn't realize it, but our sexuality directly defines our social tendencies."

"In what way?"

"In how we treat men, of course," she said. "But I digress. We are incapable of producing male children, but we need men in order to reproduce."

I frowned. How could the Sisters produce full-blooded children without men? That didn't make much sense. An asexual organism wouldn't need a man to produce children, but they _did_ need men, but they didn't _have_ men, and… I felt a headache coming on.

"During our fertile time, we must lie with a man in order to conceive," Karla said, not sparing any time for a blush even though Umi and Oni had gone bright blue across the face. "We use the energy expended during his orgasm to trigger our reproductive processes. From there, our own energy shapes the development of the child within us."

"So a man gives you the spark to get the fire going, but you're responsible for keeping the fire alive?" I asked slowly. Inside, I didn't use any pretty metaphors to organize my thoughts:_ So they're asexual so long as they can get the process triggered by an outside force?_

"Correct!" Karla said, smiling in a show of white teeth. "If we choose _not_ to lie with a man during our time, we will not conceive, and if we _do_ decide to lie with a man, our children bear no resemblance to he who triggered their growth. It was our choice, and therefore the child will be of our blood."

"So the man is just a tool?"

"Yes," said Karla. "Our will and maternal feelings shape the child into a Sister beloved by her people and the Bright Lady. The man has nothing to do with the child's development, unlike in your specie." Her face darkened. "But we are not impervious to being tainted by the race of men. If we are forced to lie with a man during our fertile time, we will conceive a child that is half us, and half of the man who triggered her. She will be a female, of course, but she will neither be one of us or one of her father's people."

My mind leapt to Hogosha. _So her mother was raped?_ I thought, remembering her odd hand and abnormal coloring. _Wow. No wonder she's with Ryu. He's fighting for misfits everywhere._

"You can imagine why we have chosen to exist away from the world of men, given our circumstances," Enich chimed in. "Men are hungry for blood and carnality, and if we did not live in solitude we would soon lose our race to the impurities of men."

"That makes sense," I relented.

"We don't hate men, though!" said the twins in unison. They were smiling at me with hopeful, open faces.

"They allow us to continue our race," said Umi, or was it Oni?

"We keep the ones we like and the ones who respect our culture safe and well cared for," said Oni, or maybe it was Umi.

Enich said: "If we deign to keep a man among us, it means he is exemplary in form, intelligence, and respect. It is an honor to be kept among us. Though we do not afford men the same rights as a Sister, the fact that they stare here of their own choosing should be enough evidence of our good care."

"And how many men do you keep?" I asked, voice timid.

"A dozen or so at the moment," said Karla. "Those are the communal men, however."

"Communal?"

"Yes. A Sister may keep a man of her own, of course, but most of them are available for any Sister's uses."

"Oh," I said in a small voice. I wasn't sure how I felt about her choice of the word 'uses'.

"You're a very strange case," Enich said, smirking as she shook her head in mock disapproval. "Having four men of your own is nigh unheard of."

I froze, and something in my face must have spoken of panic. Karla, you see, very quickly reached out to smooth my hair behind my ear and pat my head.

"She means that most Sisters tire of their men and hand them over to the communal set very quickly," she said. "Keeping yours private is a little…"

"Selfish?" I supplied.

She smiled in apology. "Somewhat. But considering that they seem to like you and not anyone else, I doubt they'd do well as communal property in any case."

The twins exchanged a look and giggled as one. "They were furious when we took you," they said, looking me up and down with more intensity than I felt comfortable with. "There is more to you than meets the eye. Perhaps you'd let the two of us see?"

I gaped, flushing red across the face. "Oh, um—"

"Enough of that," Enich said, shooting them a look that said they had had enough fun for one say, thanks. "Music calls us."

* * *

We played and played and played until I thought my fingers would fall off, and then Krishna entered the hall and the woman hopped to their feet so they could bow.

The riders certainly are respected, I said, standing so I could bow as well.

"Come with me, Elaina," Krishna said. "The Grand Mother is to make her announcement soon, and you need to be there."

Umi and Oni clasped their hands and began to whisper in excited voices, and Enich beamed. "I heard that today's proclamation will be joyous," she said.

Krishna nodded, face solemn. "It is. Please attend." She crossed over to me and, after silently asking for my permission with outstretched hands, grasped me about the waist and lifted me to sit on her shoulder. I gasped, not used to such heights, but she kept one hand wrapped around my thigh to steady me as she walked us out of the building and into the courtyard beyond. Her skin felt warm through my jeans, but not uncomfortably so.

_Not the way Hiei's would be,_ I found myself thinking a little more wistfully than I'd like to admit, and I banished the thought before it could take root.

Only belatedly did I remember Kuwabara. "My man is still inside," I said to Krishna as the watery grey light of the outdoors cast her features in sharp relief, and she looked up at me with a smirk before turning to Karla, who walked at her side, and saying: "Would you bring Elaina's man here?"

Karla did not look pleased, but Krishna was obviously not someone to argue with. The healer turned on her heel and vanished, shoulders stiff and head held high.

"Is she OK?" I couldn't help but ask as I watched her go.

"She will be," Krishna grunted as she began to push her way into the crowd. The courtyard had filled with people while I was inside, blue and green skin rippling like the sea as people parted in Krishna's wake. Many looked at her with adoration, and many more looked at me in curiosity as we came within a few meters of the stage on the courtyard's other side. It was indeed made of volcanic rock, porous and black and rough, and standing in its center was none other than the Grand Mother herself. Thanks to Krishna's height—impressive even by a Sister's standards—I was able to see the old woman quite clearly.

She saw me and offered me a smile before raising one gnarled hand into the air. "Sisters!" she called above the crowd, and I had forgotten how powerful her voice was. The whispered roar quieted the Sisters in an instant as they surged closer to the stage in a silent, staggering wave, one that did not budge the stalwart Krishna from her stance.

"We are on the eve of the Hunt," the Grand Mother went on, soft and terrible at once. "We have among us a new Sister and friend, one who has graciously volunteered herself and her possessions for our communal good."

A murmur buzzed around me, approving and all-seeing, and I felt hundreds of pairs of eyes caress my body with love and trust.

But… when had I _volunteered_ anything?

"But that is not why I am speaking to you today," the Grand Mother said. "The reason is this: Long have we awaited the awakening of the Bright Lady, she who governs over the Bright Ones with justice and love." Her voice dropped into fervent sadness. "Long have we dreaded that awakening as well, for she is the last of her kind."

The Sisters hissed as one in mournful agreement.

"We are not prepared for her arrival," she declared, spreading her arms wide. "We have not yet purified this world enough for her holy being to revel in. And yet we still Hunt, hoping to coax the Lady from her shell with our offerings and songs." Fists clenched as the Grand Mother brought them tight to her chest. Her eyes fell shut. "For many years, our efforts were not enough. No matter how long we hunted or how rich our offerings became, she would not awaken." Black eyes opened, sucking me in like vortexes set in blue satin. "But no longer shall we suffer, Sisters, for at last the answer—the answer proposed by a Sister long ago—has come into our hands."

The Grand Mother's hands dove into her robe, then, and from it she drew and object that she held over her head in triumph.

"Gaze upon this, Sisters and Mothers and Daughters!" the Grand Mother screamed. "Gaze upon it and know that our dread may cease! For this is the implement through which we shall honor the Bright Lady and her departed kin, the object that shall give the Bright Lady the means through which she can rule again!" Her face was a study in rapture. "Look upon it, Sisters," she commanded, "look upon it and _rejoice_!"

As the Sisters picked their voices up into a keening, harmonious roar that was loud enough to toss the hair atop my head, I found myself unable to look away from the mask—my mask, or one just like it, the one I had brought with me from the Human World—clutched tight between her wizened fingers. Its eyepieces glittered, staring at me as if to say _yes, look at me and weep._

The Grand Mother, I noticed with a jolt, was staring at me as well, with eyes that said _I know the secrets that you keep, small Sister. Rest assured, we keep them as one._

Too bad for her, then, that those secrets were hers alone.

* * *

Krishna took me away soon after, sparing no time to rejoice amongst the other screaming women in the square. Karla, Kuwabara and the rider's in Krishna's platoon were waiting just outside the square, and none of us spoke as Krishna mounted her squirrel and led us away from the bellowing throng. We reached the edge of the city before I worked up the nerve to speak.

"May I ask you a potentially stupid question, Krishna?" I asked in a low voice.

The Amazon, who was sitting behind me with an arm around my waist to keep me stable, snorted. "Now you will sound stupid no matter what you ask."

I did not respond to that. "What exactly happens in the Hunt?" I asked, and my fingers tightened in the squirrel's fur on reflex.

Krishna sounded flabbergasted. "You mean no one explained it to you?"

"No."

"Not even your mother?"

"Not even her."

"Oh." She paused. "Well. I know the Hunt quite well. There will be no better teacher than me."

And so she told me. Blood roared hot in my ears as her words wove a horrible picture in the air, and when she was through I could only gape up at her in shock.

Surely… she wasn't serious?

Surely she wasn't _serious_!

"Isn't… isn't that risky?" I managed to blurt out.

But Krishna did not respond with words: her lips merely parted in a sharp-toothed grin.

* * *

I surged into the house with Kuwabara hot on my heels. "Where's my gas mask?" I snapped, striding over to my pack so I could tear into it. My clothes spilled onto the ground in a cloth tumble.

Kurama, Hiei, and Yusuke had been sitting around the fire when I walked in, and none of them moved to help me locate the thing.

"Well, hello to you too, sunshine," Yusuke said. "How was your day?"

"Can it," I snapped. "Where is my mask?" When none of them spoke I said: "_Now_."

"It's gone," Kurama said, and I snapped my head up to look at him. He seemed rather amused. "The Sisters took some of our possessions after escorting us here, and that was among them." Alarm made his eyes gleam. "Why, do you feel a cough coming on?"

I growled to myself as I began stuffing my clothes back into my bag. "Dammit, then it _was_ mine," I hissed from between my teeth, and after I finished re-packing I went over to a cushion by the fire and flopped down onto my stomach. "The Sisters have my mask," I moaned into the cushion, and with numb fingers I tossed my cane aside.

Kuwabara took off his metal mask and joined me in sitting down. "I was wondering about that," he said, rubbing at his face. The mask had carved little red lines onto his cheeks and nose. "What were they talking about during that assembly?"

"Assembly?" Yusuke said. "What assembly?"

I very quickly outlined what had happened that day: Kuwabara's segregation, playing with Enich and the twins, and then the assembly. "So the Grand Mother got up on stage and started talking about how they've been trying to wake the Bright Lady up with the Hunt and presents but nothing's worked so far, but apparently giving her the mask as tribute _will_ work. The Bright Lady is the last of her kind, or something, and the mask is supposed to help her rule the world. Don't ask me why; she didn't say."

Kurama looked troubled. "Perhaps we have a third enemy approaching," he said in an ominously quiet voice. "The Bright Lady… perhaps Ryu and Seishou seek to wake her as well, hoping to use her powers to further their own ends."

"Dammit," Yusuke swore. "Not _another_ bad guy!"

"Well, we can't be certain of that until we learn more about the Lady ourselves," Kurama said. "Now, Dani, did you manage to answer any of our other questions?"

I couldn't help but grin. "Did I ever!" I said, and I dove right in. I spoke for four minutes without a single interruption.

"…and that's how the Sisters reproduce," I finished, and I looked up from my clenched hands to find everyone staring at me with open mouths. I tried not to smile; teasing them was just too fun. "Oh, don't give me that look, guys. It's just biology."

"It's just kind of awkward, OK?" Yusuke said, face showcasing an impressive shade of red.

"Awkward?" I said, raising an eyebrow. "Not hardly. What was awkward was explaining periods when they asked how _I_ worked."

"You explained _periods_ to them?" Kuwabara said, aghast, and I just rolled my eyes.

"I expected something like this," Kurama murmured. He was sitting cross-legged with his elbow on his knee and his chin on his palm. "Good work, Dani. Did you find out anything else?"

I shrugged. "They don't hate men, if that's what you're wondering. It's just that if one of the Sisters is raped, she'll produce a half-breed child and they want to keep their race pure." I tried not to look at Hiei when I said that, but I saw him stiffen out of the corner of my eye. Doubtless, he had been reminded of the Koorime. "It's why they don't want to live with too many men. Too risky and stuff."

"I see," said Kurama.

I dropped my voice for the next bit. "I'm thinking that Hogosha is the product of… well, _you_ _know_," I said. "She's not a full Sister is my point, and after what Krishna told me I think that they would have accepted her despite her blood if it weren't for her relationship with Ryu."

"How do you figure?" Kuwabara asked.

"Krishna told Hogosha to go back to her 'master,' and she said the word like a curse. But if that's not convincing enough, she flat out told me that Hogosha is rejecting tradition to be with a man on equal terms, and that that's a bad thing."

"Makes sense," Kurama said. "What else?"

I hesitated, remembering Krishna's shocking revelation. I wanted to tell them all what was going to happen, I _really_ did, but…

"Nothing at all," I fibbed, and I stood up. "Though I did figure out that if I were a polite Sister, I would hand all of you over to the public for... well, whatever they want to do with you." I smiled, but without humor. "Be glad I'm not the nicest person, I guess."

Yusuke snorted. "Yeah, thanks a lot."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, Yusuke." I turned toward the door. "Well guys, I'm going to go walk around. Try to stay out of trouble, OK?"

None of them—not even Kurama, who totally knew that I was keeping things from him—asked me not to go.

* * *

By my reasoning, the only logical thing to do next was try to fuse myself with a bird.

I mean, considering what I knew about the Hunt and considering what I was going to have to do during it, there really wasn't another choice. I couldn't take a fall from that height without killing myself and the ability to fly would probably come very much in handy, so… there you go.

I was going to have to fuse myself with a bird.

After searching for a few minutes I found a boulder by the shoreline, one that was a lot like the one I'd sat on in Genkai's meditation garden. I climbed up it and assumed my meditative stance, and as an afterthought I kicked off my shoes, grasped the hem of my shirt, and pulled it off.

_Please don't let the boys come looking for me,_ I thought as I loosened the straps of my bra as far as they could go, and once I calmed myself I slipped into theta and began building an image.

Genkai had fed me the image of a Koi during my first fusion, so this time I was all on my own. I drew up the memory of one of the only pets I'd ever had—a vicious little monk parrot named Salsa Verde—and began to go over his features one by one, solidifying the image in my head until I could look at it from all angles and see the bird as he had looked in my youth: downy grey feathers on his barrel breast and forehead, wide black eyes that looked as innocent as a baby's, bright leafy green feathers on his back and wings, and delicate little claws the color of ebony on the tips of his scaly grey feet. I made the parrot spread his wings in my mind, and on their edges and undersides sapphire blue peeked out to say hello. I looked at the weight distribution in his body until the lines of his bones started making aerodynamic sense, I looked at the way he bobbed his head to get a taste of the currents in the air, I looked at his body in flight and the way he wings melded feathers into feathers without a single lump or seam…

I drew the image in without really thinking about it, feeling it swirl around my own essence until the two clicked into harmony. My skin tingled and then _burst_ all over, and when I opened my eyes I gasped in pleasured shock.

I felt lighter, for one thing, probably because birds had hollow bones and that meant that my own bones were likewise as empty. The hands on my lap had gone scaly and grey, and my nails had sharpened into curved black claws that gleamed like onyx. A glance at my feet revealed that they had undergone a similar transformation (the bandages had unraveled around my left, but I really didn't care right then), with elongated toes and slick talons and scaly grey skin that faded into grey feathers halfway up my calf. Grey turned to green around my knees and continued upward to coat my thighs and hips, but the feathers stopped before they coated places like my stomach, abdomen, ass, or breasts. My anatomy from the waist down remained largely unchanged despite those cosmetic additions.

With the exception of my tail, of course.

The physics of my tail were really quite simple; my tailbone had simply lengthened by a few inches over the back waistband of my pants, was wrapped in incredibly thick muscle, and had a good two dozen _huge_ feathers sprouting out of it in a rigid stream. My lower back was coated in similar feathers that melded seamlessly into the rest of the tail. I could flex each feather individually and fan them at will, but I had to sit up on my knees to keep from bending them against the rock. The tail would probably have reached my ankles if I stood all the way up.

The anatomy of my torso, however, had changed _drastically_. My arms looked stronger and fuller and my shoulders had grown bigger and rounder, so much so that they strained against the loosened straps of my bra; it was a wonder the garment didn't tear. From the sides of my arms sprouted feathers almost a meter and a half long, feathers with rachises that looked as big around as my wrist and twice as strong at least. My chest was bigger, too, barrel-shaped with an expanded ribcage, a thickened collarbone, and an elongated sternum that could support the strain of my massive wings and stronger arms. Feathers coated my upper back in a water-repellent layering of material, and when the wind blew I could sense the flow of the air and the many layers that made it up.

The urge to fly hit me so hard that it was a wonder I didn't start flapping my wings right there; a yearning, a longing, a plea to take off and soar that was so insistent I had to grit my teeth to keep from leaping skyward overtook my senses, then passed. Curious, I just stretched my arms as far out as they could go so I could study the blue primary feathers on my wings' outermost tips.

_My eyesight's gotten a lot better, _I thought as I watched light burst over the feathers like fireworks. My pulse beat wild in my throat, but I wasn't feeling threatened and that fact confused me. _And my heart rate has gone up. I'm breathing quicker, too._

A memory of my highschool biology class swam out of the dark—something about birds having high metabolic rates and fast respiratory systems. Then a memory of my teacher laughing came to mind.

"The phrase 'eat like a bird' isn't actually a correct depiction of bird physiology," he had said. "We say it when we mean that people aren't eating enough, but birds actually have to consume many times their body weight each day to cope with their quick metabolisms."

_I guess this is natural, then?_ I thought, flexing my arms as my breath continued to run shallow and fast in my chest. Despite that, I didn't feel lightheaded at all, and then my feathers rippled as a gust of wind teased my newfound instinct to take to the skies and fly.

"No wonder Jin can't keep his feet on the ground," I muttered, and I felt a little surprised to hear my own voice come out of my mouth. Blinking, I reasoned with a chuckle: "Well, I guess parrots _can_ talk, so…"

I didn't have a beak, I realized, and my teeth and lips were intact, but when I touched my nose I found two small openings on my face that hadn't been there before. They were tiny pits, as far as I could tell, one situated on either side of the bridge of my nose—avian nostrils, I supposed. There was also a smattering of downy feathers on the sides of my cheek and neck, and my hair had…

_Wow,_ I thought as I gingerly touched the long, flexible, and wavy feathers that had taken the place of my hair. The feathers were just as long as my old strands, but these were sapphire blue and these were _definitely_ feathers. _Wow. I really wasn't expecting that._

Neither, I think, was Hiei, because when his voice from behind me asked, "What the hell are you _doing_?", it sounded quite stunned indeed.

_

* * *

_____

NOTES:

_I did a crap-ton of research for the bird transformation! Mostly by pestering my father—an obsessive birdwatcher of the highest order—all week. That man is a fountain of birdy knowledge. I hope it showed._

_I feel like a sparrow or a mockingbird would fit Dani better, but I realized that she'd know what an old pet looked like more than a wild bird, and… well, the monk parrot came to mind. Hence, parrot-y-ness._

_Also, a picture of Dani as a bird was drawn by ThatPokemonFreak many months ago, but I held off talking about it until now because I felt like this was more appropriate. I didn't realize I'd get to work bird-Dani in when she drew it, but what can I say, her work inspired me! Link is on my profile!_

_Title song is "To the Sky" by Owl City, which I find totally appropriate considering that the song was written for a movie about birds by a band with a bird-themed name. GREAT SONG, too, and I'm not usually thrilled with that type of music._

_Anyway. Lots of plot in this. Next chapter we get to see… THE HUNT. And it shall be fun, I promise. More plot to come, too, plus the reason why Dani needs to be a bird in the first place. _

_I am happy to report that romance will now take a back seat to the plot. FINALLY. I was getting tired of all that emotion. However, there will be a nice (but small) set of Hiei moments next chapter, so use it to tide you over as the plot takes the story by storm. _

_And… they might have something to do with what happened when Dani was passed out by the river… just so you know._

_Moving on. It's finals week for me and I'm not sure how I managed to write a nine thousand word chapter, so… yeah. I surprised myself! But I didn't get to reply to all the review because I was so busy, so please have mercy on my in that regard. I will have more time next week!_

_New poll on my profile: "Hiei or Koenma?" I'd like to see how it stands so GO VOTE! Please?_

_As always, you guys rock my socks so hard I see stars each and every week! NAO-chan33, Miss Nayru, Reclun, rannoush, Heart's Icy Touch, StrawberryxXxKisses, yumchaitea, XxXTwilight-SinXxX, Dragon of Twilight, DoilyRox, dude where's my spirit gun, Koryu Elric, Kaiya's Watergarden, Foxgirl Ray, darkravensnight, HitsugayaFanGirl, Supreme Baka, chocolateluvr13, Zetsubel, Kai-Chan94, j.d.y., SillyGoddessDisco, etowa-ru, loser94, WillowLeaf2560, DevilAngelWolf27, Angel of Randomosity, itsallaboutbob, shishifearme, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Fuurai, Ghost0Silvers, AkaMizu-chan, Katt Jeane, TallyYoungBlood, XxXfiction, undercover prep, Snowgirl7589, FledgelingInk, Crescent Venus, 0nfateswings, rain chant, Masuyo Shun, and Bi Gay Straight Who Cares!_


	47. Chapter 47: In For the Kill, First: Love

Boring HieixDani moment alert, blah blah, skip to the next page break if you want to get right to the plot.

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 47:

"First, Love"

Or

"In For the Kill"

* * *

I didn't turn around. Luckily, Hiei took it upon himself to dart in front of me. He stood a few feet from the rock with his hands clenched tight at his sides, eyes bugging out of his head as he took in my transformation: the talons, the wings, the feathers, the hair.

"Hello," I said, voice sounding like a frightened child's, and Hiei's gaze collided with my own.

My avian vision was better than my normal vision. Thus, when my eyes met Hiei's I realized that I had missed a few things, things like the dark ring that lined his iris, the brighter and deeper red striations around his midnight pupil that caught the light and shattered it, the stunning clarity of color that made his eyes seem gemlike, surreal, and...

"What is the meaning of this?" Hiei asked. His voice carried a rough edge, one that made the feathers on the nape of my neck ruffle.

"No need to get snippy," I returned, and my nerves made me raise a hand to curl my feather-hair behind my ear. However, I _had_ no ear—just a small hole in the side of my skull, and when the pads of my questing fingers encountered this they recoiled with a snap. "Is… is my ear gone?" I stammered, turning my head so Hiei could see.

He snorted. "Birds don't have ears like ours," he said.

I attempted to crack a weak smile and a joke. "Fish, birds—no matter what I turn into my ears disappear."

Hiei, however, was not to be distracted. "Why are you doing this?" he asked, eyes tracing my body with a scowl.

"Oh, you mean the bird thing?" I said, trying to keep the tremor out of my voice. "Oh, you know, just trying to expand my repertoire and stuff. My fish form is only useful in a few situations and I figured that a bird—"

"It doesn't have something to do with the Hunt, does it?" Hiei said, voice knifing through mine like a blade, and I froze. "We know you know more than you're letting on. You're a horrible liar."

I decided to bust out a half-truth—they tended to work well, in my experience. "None of you have anything to worry about," I assured him, because it was mostly true. "You'll all be perfectly safe; I wouldn't go through with this if you guys were going to be sacrificed, or something."

"Then why the secrecy?"

I did not reply, afraid to break the not-the-whole-truth with my notoriously big mouth, and his eyes narrowed. I could see a realization rising to their cherry-red surface like magma bubbles.

"_We_ don't have anything to worry about," he said slowly, "but _you_ do."

My back stiffened on reflex.

_Bingo, babycake._

"I don't even have to read your mind to see that that's a 'yes,'" he said, and I glared at him. He was looking at my body, however, with a critical eye. "A bird…" Our eyes met; his brow quirked. "I take it you're going to have to fall from a great height."

Rather than answer, I just grabbed my cane and started to climb off the rock. _When cornered_, I always say, _retreat_.

Fate, however, is a funny thing.

Actually, I take that back: Fate's not a funny thing at all—it's evil, sadistic, opportunistic, and mean. I hate Fate. But Fate _loves_ me, and when I tried to get up Fate used a combination of my clumsily taloned hands and feet, the steam-slicked rock, and gravity to make my cane lose traction and send me pitching forward off the boulder and down to the pebbled beach below. I spread my wings on reflex to slow my fall, but it did me little good and with a screech and a 'whump' I landed on my right knee, glancing off to the side so my shoulder took the rest of the blow. I felt feathers tear from my skin with a series of sharp pops.

If that was a sign of what was to come… well, I hoped it wasn't.

Hiei was next to me before I could say 'ouch,' and his fingers pressed tight onto my feathered shoulders as he hauled me into a sitting position and forced me to lean back against the boulder. My tail lay crushed between my back and the rock, much to my detached annoyance, and then Hiei's hand shot out, ruffling the down on my cheeks as it passed right beside my face, and the next thing I knew he had a bundle of red cloth in his hand and he was pressing it, hard, onto the ball of my right knee.

All of that happened before the pain—pain in my knee from where the rocks had scraped away my skin and feathers, pain in my shoulder from impact and more feather fatalities—kicked in, a vicious rash of pin-prick stings where my feathers had been torn out and the deeper, sharper pain of the wound on my leg. Blood rolled down my shin in a trickle, barred from truly gushing by Hiei's hands and the ruins of my shirt…

Wait.

Shirt?

In that moment I remembered that I had taken it off to shapeshift. My face turned the color of a tomato. Hiei, to my relief, didn't seem to notice as he hissed: "You can't even fall off a damned _rock_ without killing yourself and you expect to jump off a _cliff_ tomorrow?"

"I'm not jumping off a cliff," I said, feeling a little numb around the edges. "Well, sort of. It's kind of a long story."

"Whatever," said Hiei. Eyes darted up to meet mine before falling to my knee. He didn't warn me when he stripped the shirt away; it hurt like a bitch and started welling fresh blood from a shallow scrape about four inches long and two inches wide that peered through a huge rip in the fabric of my jeans. The feathers around the wound looked like melted chocolate since the blood had gummed them all up.

"Change back," Hiei said, still staring at my knee. "I can't see a thing with these damned feathers in the way."

I did as he said, slipping into theta before summoning up the image of myself and merging with it. My tail shrank and my chest collapsed and my legs and fingers went back to normal as all my feathers shivered, bubbled, and slid back into my pores like little knives into their sheathes.

My arms went around my chest when the change was through; the bra had been cutting into me when my ribcage expanded as a bird, but as a human it was loose to the point of almost falling off. I didn't look at Hiei after reverting to my human form, choosing instead to look down at my stinging shoulder. The skin there looked raw and razor-burned, but otherwise the whole pulling-out-feathers thing didn't seem like a major injury.

"You didn't use pain to change that time," Hiei said suddenly.

I had no idea what he meant and jumped a little in surprise, almost kneeing him in the nose on accident. He glared and shoved my leg back down with a firm push to the thigh, and I asked: "What are you talking about?"

He peeled my shirt off my knee again, studying the wound with eyes that missed nothing. As he reapplied the makeshift tourniquet, he met my eyes and said: "You used to have to bite yourself to change. Now you don't. That means you've gotten stronger."

I paused. "Did you just compliment me?" I asked in a hushed voice.

Hiei snorted. "Don't be ridiculous. You're still weak enough to fall off rocks."

I couldn't help but slug him lightly on the shoulder with my fist (an action that made _him_ jump in mild surprise). "Oh, don't ruin it!" I sighed. "This is a momentous occasion!"

He seemed like he was trying to suppress amusement—with Hiei, you can tell because his lips twitch a bit before he starts to scowl. "How do you figure?" he asked, checking my knee yet again.

"Because that was, like, the nicest thing you've ever said to me!" I said.

For a second I thought I had offended him because his shoulders tensed and his jaw clenched, but then the reaction passed and he took my shirt from my knee, shook it out, and rolled it up like he was about to crack the garment like a whip. Instead, he wound the shirt around my knee and tied it off, the motions as precise and as neat as they'd been when he wrapped up my foot the night before.

"I should take you back to the others," he said, not looking at me as he stood up. "Night's about to fall."

Though I hadn't noticed it, the grey sky had indeed gone… well, greyer. Darker grey, at least. "Oh," I said, and when I looked up at Hiei I saw that he had held out a hand to help me up. The gesture was not a familiar one; Hiei wasn't into randomly touchy and helpful stuff like that.

He cleared his throat when I didn't reach for the offered limb. "Let's go," he urged, and I shifted in discomfort.

"I'm… kind of not dressed," I said, tomato-face making another appearance, and Hiei rolled his eyes. The expression wasn't one I was used to witnessing cross his face.

"I've seen you before," he said in a thoroughly not-suggesting-anything way, but I only blushed harder.

"Still, I'm a girl," I snapped. "Feminine modesty and all that; heard of it?"

His eyes narrowed, then relaxed into an expression crossed halfway between humor, derision, and adamantine force.

Before I could take in what was happening, Hiei had reached for the hem of his shirt and stripped it off over his head.

I looked away on instinct, yelping a little as I covered my eyes with my hand. "Why are you stripping?" I all but screeched.

"Your shirt is ruined. Use mine," I heard him say, and pebbles shifted beneath his feet. I peered out from between my fingers to find him kneeling again, black shirt with the cut-off sleeves held out in one battle-worn hand. Not quite knowing what else to do, I gingerly took it from him and started looking for the hole I was supposed to put my head through.

My eyes, however, wandered.

Who the hell can blame me, though? This was Hiei we were talking about—muscled to the point of being about as soft-looking as a cement wall—all hard lines and flat planes and abs and all those other lovely things girls tend to lust over. And he _was_ lust-worthy; there's no way to get around that. That man had a body I'm sure any testosterone possessing guy would envy.

The muscles, however, weren't what caught my eye. I saw the _marks_ right as I looked away, embarrassed when I realized just how hard I'd been staring, and I did a horrible double take before leaning forward and staring unabashedly at Hiei's chest.

"What are you looking at, woman?" I heard him say in a low, silky voice, and I looked up to find him staring down at me through eyes that were half-way closed.

He had scars: lots of them. Most were white and thin, though below his ribs lay a thick and ropey one that looked like it had hurt, tons (_from when Shigure cut him in half,_ I thought). All of them looked old and faded, except for…

I pointed his left pectoral muscle with the hand not holding his shirt. Five thick lines—pale pink ones that looked like they were on the verge of disappearing from Hiei's tanned skin altogether—started in the middle of his pec before moving upward, trailing over his shoulder, and disappearing onto his back.

"What happened to your skin?" I asked.

Hiei, oddly enough, went very, very still, like he was trying not to telegraph how he was feeling by making his body language little more emotional than a mannequin's. What did _that_ mean?

To cover my unease, I darkened my expression and said: "Has Kuwabara been beating you up again?"

"Kuwabara could never beat me up and you know it," he growled, composure cracking around the edges.

"I was being facetious."

He paused, looking down at his chest as I finally found the opening in his shirt and started to pull it over my head. I was still enmeshed inside the black garment, fighting to find the arm holes, when he finally answered my question in the voice my dad had used to tell me that one of my childhood pets had died.

"I'm not the only one who can get out of control in the heat of the moment, Dani."

I froze, black shirt still over my face and hair as my body locked up and my chest went cold to the core. Hiei's scent clung to his clothes and invaded my nose and mouth, char and metal and evergreen calling up memories of heat and—

"What are you talking about?" I said slowly, and I felt two hands tug on the hem of the shirt until my head popped out the top. Hiei was looking at me with an odd mixture of emotions, regret and steely resolve chief among them as he drew his hands away from me and placed his palm flat across the marks, and in a very deliberate gesture he dragged his fingernails up the path marked so clearly against his skin. I watched the motion like a hawk, feeling empty and too alive at once as his eyes bored into mine in a very deliberate way, and then it hit me.

That look… that mark… those words…

"_I_… gave you that?" I asked.

Hiei nodded, hand dropping to the ground. His fingers fisted in the pebbles.

I stared at the marks, unable to look anywhere else as I put two and two together into a thoroughly alarming total of OH MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL?

"You're not… talking about that night after I got pinned by Sioh, are you?" I asked, voice shaking.

"What if I am?" he asked.

I looked into his face and saw the answer there. "OhmyGawd, you are," I said in a voice so low even I could barely hear it, and then panic made the words bubble up and burst. "What did I _do_? To you, I mean. Or, or, or what did _we_ do? Did we do something? I gotta know, Hiei, it's—"

Hiei stood up. I rose to my good knee as he turned and took a few steps away, calling "Hiei!" after him because I _needed_ to know what was going on, dammit, and he was not going to hint at what happened that night and leave it hanging _again_! "Hiei, Hiei, _wait_!"

He stopped walking as I rose to my feet, stumbled, and leaned against the boulder to steady myself. "Hiei, what _happened_?" I asked, breathless, and when he didn't answer after a few moments I closed my eyes. He wasn't going to tell me, but what had I _done_? What had—

"You _asked_ for it."

My eyes snapped open, taking in his back and the sight of those same five lines arching between his shoulder blades, cascading down his spine, and veering off to crest over his defined hip. "I did _what_?" I said, not understanding his words at all.

Hiei turned around to face me, eyes blazing with pride and a _dare_ to defy him, to claim that his words weren't true.

"You asked," he said, and then he showed a face I'd never seen him wear, one of uncertainty and hesitation and a little bit of… was that _embarrassment_?

_WHAT?_

I shook my head, not getting it. "Asked for what?"

"You asked for _me_," he said.

His glittering eyes said everything his words left unclear. I understood their meaning better than I did the sound of my own name as my breathing stopped, started, and stopped again. I rocked a little in place in time to my thundering heartbeats before I found the power to whisper: "Did we…?"

Hiei's face closed itself off into a completely emotionless mask. "Did we what?" he snapped.

Temper flared. "You _know_ what!"

"Does it matter?"

"Of _course_ it matters!"

"Why?"

I floundered. "Because… because…"

When he took a step forward I took a step back, recoiling from his smoldering eyes so I wouldn't get burned. "Dani…" he said, and I couldn't look at him anymore.

I ran my fingers through my hair, squeezed my eyes shut, and took ten deep breaths to calm myself. Once composed, I very, very carefully enunciated my next words. They were difficult to say, but I am happy that my voice did not falter even once.

"It matters," I said, "because I would appreciate knowing whether or not I lost my virginity while I was practically unconscious."

And with _that_, the cat was out of the proverbial bag. There wasn't much else that could embarrass me after saying something so personal in front of him, so I opened my eyes. Hiei had frozen with wide, cherry-colored irises reflecting the empty grey sky above.

Predictably, my strength vanished and I got defensive. "Most girls are concerned with such things!" I said, wrapping my arms around my chest.

Hiei blinked and scowled, shock shattering in a second. "I still don't understand _why_ it matters so much," he growled. "Why do you even care if we did it or not?"

My jaw dropped.

He didn't under… what?

_WHAT_?

Just what the fucking _hell_ was there to not _understand_?

"I'd just…" I said, stuttering, "I'd just like for my first time to be… to be _special_!"

One black eyebrow shot up. "So if we _did_ have sex, it wouldn't have been special?"

Flabbergasted, I snapped: "Of course not!"

"Why?" he wanted to know. His tone was brusque. "It would have been to save your life by warming you faster. What's more special than your first time being dedicated to _that_?"

He had a point, but: "Being _conscious_ would be more special!"

He mocked me: "So if you were raped but you remember it the next day, it would be special? Is that what you're saying?"

"NO!" was all I could say.

"Then what _would_ be special?" That damnable demon seemed to be losing his patience, clenched fists and feet-planted posture and teeth-baring snarl and all. "Tell me so I can understand."

My mouth worked as I tried to put words to what I thought was obvious. "I, I want it to be with someone I love," I stammered.

To my immense surprise, Hiei looked—hurt?

"But that's, that's not the whole thing!" I quickly added, jumping to wipe that hurting twinge from his eyes even though I didn't know why I wanted to. "It's more than just being with someone I care for—I want the experience to be something I can look back on and… and feel happy about." My cheeks colored as the words came faster. "I want my first time to be a memory I can pull up and relive and mull over and treasure… with the person I made it with."

If his softened expression—well, soft for Hiei, at any rate, which basically meant he looked like thumbtacks instead of nails—was any indication, he had begun to get it.

"If I don't remember anything about it," I went on quietly, "it defeats the entire purpose of saving my first time for whoever it is I end up giving it to. I would have saved myself for nothing." When I realized just what I was saying, I put my hands over my face. "Christ, I sound like a melodramatic, Catholic girly-girl."

"You don't."

For what seemed like the billionth time that day, I froze behind my hands. When I finally recovered enough to look up, Hiei had started to walk away.

"Wait, Hiei!" I blurted, and he turned his head over his shoulder. A smirk played around the corners of his mouth, but I tried not to look at his lips when I said: "So… did we? Because I won't be mad if…"

His smirk turned into a scowl. "Do you really think so little of me?" he said. He turned his face away. "I wouldn't do that to you."

The tension dropped out of my shoulders in a rush.

"Even though you asked for it, I did not comply." A pause. "I knew you'd regret it later. Not why, of course, but I knew…"

Again, I found myself rushing to console him: "I wouldn't have regre—eh? Uh…"

I bit the words off as Hiei's head whipped in my direction, eyes blazing with confusion and alarm as my hand flew to cover my lips. My heart hammered in my throat.

What the hell had I almost _said_ just then?

"You wouldn't have what, now?" he said, lips barely moving as he spoke.

I tried not to show just how interesting I found the sight of his chest rising and falling as he breathed show on my face, so I sighed, hung my head, and when I could think of no response I inhaled until I felt my lungs might burst. Hiei's shirt still smelled like him, like evergreen, metal, and char—those were his scents, undercut by something warm and alive that I had never noticed until then, but I knew I'd smelled before.

I found it comforting, for whatever reason.

"Never mind," I said, gripping my cane tighter. "Let's go."

When neither of us could speak, Hiei lead the way indoors.

* * *

Yusuke looked suspicious. "Why are you wearing Hiei's shirt?"

"Because mine is wrapped around my leg," I grunted as I walked over to my backpack. Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Kurama were all sitting around the fire; Hiei joined them and sat down as I searched for my bag of shampoo and other related items.

"Did something happen?" Kurama asked, eyeing the injury. "That looks bloody."

I went for the short version. "I tripped."

"She can turn into a bird now," Hiei said. He stared into the fire like it was talking to him. "She can't fly, obviously."

"What? When did that happen?" Kuwabara said, throwing up his hands in frustration. "Why is it that I always get left in the dark until the last minute and—"

"I only figured it the last hour," I said. I brandished my shampoo bottle like a bludgeon. "I wanna wash my hair. I smell like bird."

"Birds have a smell?" Yusuke asked.

"Yeah." I paused, then informed him: "It's not bad, just weird." I turned for the bathroom, tucking my toiletries bag and bundle of fresh clothes under my arm. I smirked over my shoulder. "Tell 'em what you know, Hiei, but I'm not saying anything more so you can all just wait until tomorrow to get more details on the Hunt."

Hiei snorted. "You are entirely too confident of your secret keeping abilities."

"I try," I said, walking off. My wound didn't affect my walk too badly, but it still stung when my jeans chafed the edges of the scrape. "See you soon."

I left them and walked to the lowest bathing pool, stripping my jeans from my legs with care so I didn't reopen the scrab on my knee. I had grabbed some of Karla's salve off the table where I'd left it, and once I cleaned the drying blood from the wound I smeared the paste across it and wrapped it in some of the gauze she had provided. The rest of my bathing routine passed in a blur (I tried not to think about my conversation with Hiei during it, keeping myself busy to keep my memories at bay) and when I was through I skipped taking a soak in the upper pool and just got dressed in a t-shirt and shorts. Kuwabara had begun cooking a meal when I returned, hair falling wet and loose over my shoulders and neck as I sat down by the fire's side. Yusuke got up and headed to the bathroom, whistling between his teeth as he said: "Use up all the hot water, Dani?"

"Only to piss you off," I shot back, and he grinned before disappearing.

Kurama very quickly pinned me with a gaze and changed the subject with equal speed. "I don't know what you're going to have to do tomorrow, but telling us would—"

"It would only worry you," I told him, and I looked at Hiei. He hadn't moved since I left and was still staring into the fire. "Hey, Hiei?"

His eyes were the only thing that moved when he looked at me.

I waved the pot of salve at him. "Can you help me with my foot?"

He didn't hesitate, rolling bonelessly to his feet before sitting in front of me and pulling my foot into his lap. Hot fingers on my skin soothed aches brought out by the bath, and I tried not to look fascinated by his deft hands as they smeared salve and bound linen and…

Kurama cleared his throat; I looked over at him with a blush and found him smirking.

"Feel free to tell us more if the urge hits you," he said, and Hiei finished with my leg before moving away. "We won't press."

I opened my mouth to thank him, then closed it. Instead I opted for saying: "I'm not supposed to tell you this, but don't fight." I stared into the fire. "Whatever you do, do _not_ fight."

Kurama and Hiei—and Kuwabara, who looked up from stirring a pot of stew with wide eyes—tensed.

"I can't tell you more," I said, tone laced with apology. "There are reasons, but… Just don't fight. It won't get you anywhere."

"And I suppose you can't tell us why, of course," said Kurama dryly.

"No," I said, and I looked away. "I can't."

* * *

The next morning dawned dark and damp. Rain fell in fat drops from roiling black clouds, matting the fur of the squirrels down into clumpy tufts that looked like threaded scales. I tried shielding my eyes from the persistent rain with my hand, but it did me little good.

Krishna, behind me, didn't say a word as she maneuvered her squirrel amid the steam drafts between the big island and the small one. The other riders glided behind us with all the silence of the dead, each one bearing one of 'my men' in their saddles.

A part of me had wanted to tell the boys what was going to happen to them, to spill it all despite the warnings Krishna had to adamantly laid down, but the other part of me… well, what I had said was enough. More than enough, in fact.

It had to be.

We alit on the opposite shore and watched as the other riders deposited my friends on the pebbled beach. They all had to walk past Krishna and I, since we were perched atop a large boulder to monitor the procession as was Krishna's duty, and I tried to give the boys a reassuring smile as they walked with masked faces past me and into the city with the riders. Hiei's hair looked somewhat deflated given that it was slicked with water, and Yusuke's bangs had fallen forward to cling to his metal-wrapped forehead.

"You didn't tell them, of course," Krishna remarked, and I shook my head.

"I only told them not to fight," I said, mouth going dry despite the rain on my lips.

"Wise words, since saying more could kill them," she said, and then she steered the squirrel after the other riders. They veered off the path early, however, and did not enter the city itself. Krishna and I pressed on alone, but I twisted in the saddle to watch the guys march stolidly away.

"They will be prepared before entering," Krishna told me. "We must attend the blessing ceremony—you, especially."

"I know," I said, because she had told me the day before and I had stayed up most of the night thinking about it. My eyes burned at the edges from lack of sleep.

Together we rode into the city. The streets, not to my surprise, were totally deserted until we reached the square, and that was filled to the brim with what appeared to be almost every Sister on the island—excepting Krishna's riders, of course. The sea of Sisters parted before Krishna's mount with a roar of approval, many of them choosing to toss pink flowers at us and scream with excited joy. The Grand Mother and members of the council stood on the stage, looking at us with approval as we approached.

To my horror, however, Hogosha stood with three other women just behind the Grand Mother.

She did not seem to recognize me as Krishna picked me up and placed me on the stage from her seat in the saddle. The half-breed's eyes were trained on the sky, hands shoved into her bell-shaped white sleeves like some sort of monk. She was the only person in the entire square wearing white, I noticed: everyone else wore black, dark brown, or a dark shade of another color. I was wearing a black sweatshirt over a grey tanktop because Krishna had told me to wear dark colors, though she hadn't exactly said why, and I found myself wondering at this as I walked (at the Grand Mother's pointed signal) to stand in the line…

… and just my luck, I had to stand next to Hogosha, as far away from the Grand Mother as possible.

It seemed that they had been waiting on me, because as soon as I nervously settled in next to the seven-foot-tall Hogosha the Grand Mother spread her hands and called: "Sisters! We have come together today to bless the rite of the Hunt!"

They cheered; of course they did. My ears rang as they screamed, and then the Grand Mother raised her hand for silence.

"We have five brave Sisters who are offering their lives to bring down one of the Sacred Beasts," she called. She held up a hand and leveled it at us, indicating each waiting Sister in turn. "We are here to bless their chosen weapons, that they may bring down the Sacred Beasts with the honor and reverence they deserve. Now Orimand, step forward!"

The first Sister in line—a rather short nine-footer with so much muscle it was a wonder she fit into her leather breastplate—went to the Grand Mother and knelt at her side.

"Have you chosen your man, Sister Orimand?" the Grand Mother asked.

"I have, Grand Mother," the amazon said. "His name is Renji."

"And have you chosen your weapon?"

"Yes, Grand Mother." From her back she pulled a warhammer made of dark metal, one that looked very much like a pickaxe that was even taller than I was. She placed it flat on her palms and offered it up, head bowed in supplication.

The Grand Mother gestured to one of the council members lining the back of the stage, and one of them detached from the rest to bring forth a bowl made of… ruby? It was a translucent red bowl, at any rate, that glittered in the rainy-grey light of the sky above. The Grand Mother dipped her fingers in the liquid inside and placed them on the hammer's blunt head, tracing them in a deliberate pattern as she spoke.

"Sister Orimand, may your blade fly true," she whispered in a voice so loud my eardrums ached. "May the death of the Scared Beast come swift and just, for you are her Sister and care for her as much in death as you do for her in life. May your killing blow be one of mercy, and not bloodlust." Her fingers lifted and pressed themselves to Orimand's deep green forehead. "Go with grace. Your Sisters are with you."

"Thank you, Grand Mother," Orimand said, but she made no move to stand until the Grand Mother said: "You may rise, Sister."

Orimand promptly bolted to her feet, raising the hammer above her head in triumph as the Sisters cheered her on. When the screams died, the Grand Mother gestured at the next Sister and called: "Herina, step forward!"

Herina had a man named Tomou and a bow and arrow, and all of it was blessed with the liquid from the bowl before she rose and accepted the cheers of the Sisters. Then it was Nik's turn (she had a very impressive broadsword at least twice as long as I was tall and a man named Kore), and after her Hogosha was called forward.

I sensed that the crowd clammed up when the half-breed stepped toward the Grand Mother and knelt, her braid of white hair falling over her shoulder like a snake.

"Have you chosen your man, Sister Hogosha?" the crone asked. There was another question lurking beneath that one, but for the life of me I didn't know what it was.

Hogosha sensed it too, if her scowl was proof enough. "I have, Grand Mother," she said with her musical voice. "His name is Ryu."

The bottom fell out of my stomach and I think I swayed a little on my feet. _Will the boys see him_? I thought, but then the Grand Mother asked about Hogosha's weapon.

Rather than reply as the others hand, Hogosha merely removed her right hand from her sleeve and raised it up, palm lying flat so all could see its spherical shape and the lattice-worked fingers crowning it. The Grand Mother's eyes darkened with disapproval, but once more she dipped her fingers into the bowl and blessed Hogosha's 'weapon' with the appropriate words. But when it came time for Hogosha to thank the Grand Mother and wait for a command to rise, she simply got up and walked back to the line with a bland smile. Orimand, Herina, and Nik all bristled at this disrespect, but before the crowd could take up an enraged bellow the Grand Mother tactfully called my name.

My heart leapt into my mouth as I crossed to her, carefully knelt, and bowed my head.

"Have you chosen your men, Sister Elaina?" she asked.

"I have, Grand Mother," I said, and I took a deep breath before saying: "Their names are—"

My thoughts ran dry.

Hogosha was standing right behind me.

_I couldn't say their names!_

"Their names?" the Grand Mother prompted when I remained silent.

"Their names are David, Hiruma, Sena, and Timothy," I lied, pulling random names from absolutely nowhere. _Pleas buy it, please buy it, please buy it—_

The Sisters' voices rose into a thrumming whisper of confirmation, though I couldn't tell if it was positive or negative. I hoped for the former and prayed against the latter.

"Have you chosen your weapon, Sister Elaina?" she asked. To my intense relief, she did not seem to want to deviate from the standard blessing even though I had more men than necessary (and ones with false names, at that). I didn't want to stand out any more than I already did.

"Yes, Grand Mother," I said, projecting my voice as best I could, and I very carefully freed the hidden blade from my white cane and presented it to her.

"Sister Elaina," she said, repeating the same words she had spoken to the others, "may your blade fly true. May the death of the Scared Beast come swift and just, for you are her Sister and care for her as much in death as you do for her in life. May your killing blow be one of mercy, and not bloodlust." She pressed the tips of her fingers to my forehead, then, and the oily substance from the bowl made my head glow with an oddly radiant warmth that soaked into my skull and awoke it with a tingling rush. My tiredness seemed to melt away and become replaced with a sense of _I-can-totally-do-this! _as she said: "Go with grace. Your Sisters are with you."

"Thank you, Grand Mother," I said, and I waited for her to say "You may rise, Sister," before standing and thrusting my cane sword into the air.

The cheers only intensified my sudden mood swing, and I couldn't help but grin and laugh as their confident crowing filled me to the brim with courage and an eagerness I was at a loss to describe. The Grand Mother was saying something, something about honoring the Bright Lady with our kills and bringing peace in the wake of our swords, but I hardly heard her as Hogosha and the others walked off the stage and Krishna suddenly appeared, scooping me into her arms mid-laugh before she carried me away, onto the back of her squirrel, and out of the screaming square.

* * *

Krishna took me to the site of the Hunt, and it was exactly as she had described: a long stone canyon in the shape of an oblong oval. On one of the shorter ends was a dark chasm of a cave, a jagged vertical crack in the rock that seemed to suck in light and snuff it out completely. The floor of the gigantic stone valley was carved into something resembling a maze, the walls of which were at least eight to ten stories tall and carved of solid rock. Riders patrolled those walls with spears and other weapons, but they were little more than moving specks as we sat on the opposite end of the canyon, where it narrowed into a tight channel littered with the bones of previous kills. Krishna's squirrel perched high on the lip of the canyon's cliff, at least fifteen stories above the flat floor. It was a sheer drop down to a nasty death if you weren't careful.

I can't really give you a sense of scale because the words simply can't be managed, but have you ever seen the Grand Canyon?

Yeah.

It was kind of like that.

Krishna pointed with one massive finger at the foreboding cave at least five miles away from us. "That," she said, "is where the Salamander sleeps."

"You know, I kind of figured," I chirped.

"Your men will be placed before it when the other Beast-Slayers are in place," she said. "They are at other nests."

"Too many cooks spoil the broth!" I sang.

Krishna raised an eyebrow. "The men will lure the Beast here for you to slay, but do not worry, the path to this place is clearly marked and the Riders will guide them if they go off course. If your men seem like they are in mortal danger—"

"The Riders will save them!" I burst in, bouncing in my seat with glee. "I know I know you told me yesterday! I love the Riders. They're so cool! Have I mentioned that? You're the coolest, though, because you—"

I babbled on and on, oblivious to Krishna's amused—but concerned—expression. Rain and wind whipped my hair into my face, but it wasn't too cold and the water only made me more aware of every inch of my exposed skin, every breath of air that caused the hairs on the back of my neck to rise, every—

I should have been afraid at that point.

Needless to say, I wasn't.

"I'm ready!" I kept saying, and she kept smirking in response until my cries grew wearisome.

"The oils of blessing must affect you more than the others," she remarked, "due to your small size."

I stopped grinning long enough to say: "Oils?"

"Yes," said Krishna as the squirrel walked along the edge of the cliff. Rocks fell when its claws came close to the lip of the precipice. "It stimulates a warrior's drive and lessens their fear, but not so much that they lose focus." Her lips pursed. "You, however, are becoming somewhat foolhardy. We did not expect that."

"Oh, I'll be fine!" I told her, and a bright flash of orange-red light caught my eye. I whipped my head around to see the cave brighten in the distance, grow dim, then flare again. "Look, look, something's _happening_, Krishna, something's _happening_!"

"The men are in place and have attracted the Salamander's attention," she explained, and she tugged her squirrel to a stop before jumping off and pulling me off, too. She carried me to the edge and put me down; I leaned forward and peered into the narrow gorge, seeing boulders as big as houses littering the floor so many meters below.

I felt a little fear creep into my brain. "That's a long drop," I whispered, and Krishna pulled me away from the edge. The rocky ground suddenly seemed much less immoveable.

"You are prepared to make this jump?" she said, and I took a deep breath before nodding. "And do you remember the weak point?"

Fear had come back so hard I felt like I might throw up if I opened my mouth, so I just pointed at my forehead and grinned. Well, grimaced. Or something.

Her black eyes focused over my shoulder. "You can see the Salamander now, if you look," she rumbled, and I turned.

It looked like little more than a scarlet toy from where I stood so high up in the sky, but even though I could have covered the vision with my thumb I knew that the creature surging out of the crack was big, bigger than anything I had ever seen move on land. It had nothing on Sioh, of course, but I could still see its long body, short legs, arrow-shaped head, and whipping tail from so far away. I could make out no details before it vanished into the rock maze—_chasing after your friends, Dani, your _friends_, remember that!—_but I knew from the way my legs began to shake that…

"Oh man," I said. "Oh MAN."

"You should prepare," Krishna murmured. "It will be here in roughly twenty minutes, if your men can keep pace ahead of it."

Sitting down was less a choice at that point than it was a product of my legs not being able to hold myself up any longer. My hands shook, too, as I inched my way toward the cliff ledge and peeked over it, head dizzying as I saw the drop and the floor and the boulders and—

"Can I do this?" I asked Krishna.

The giantess did not hesitate before nodding, squatting before me, and touching my hair softly.

"You will be triumphant," she said in a solemn voice. "And if you are in dire need, I will aid you." Her look darkened and softened at once. "Your men will as well. I know that much. They all care for you."

I realized she was right with the mental equivalent of a relieved sigh. _They will help me if I need it,_ I thought, and I felt myself smile. My fear abated an iota, but it was more than enough.

_Those guys… those guys are true friends. All of them._

"Yeah," I agreed at last, and I pulled my legs into a crisscross so I could lay my cane across my lap. "I'm going to prepare myself," I said, breathing in and out to calm myself further. I carefully pulled my sweatshirt off over my head, loosened the straps on my tank top and bra, and unbuttoned my jeans so my tail would have room to grow. When my heart rate slowed to a normal pace I twisted my body toward the chasm, hooked my legs over it and into thin air, and dove…

… into theta.

Calling up my bird form came with a little effort; fear kept cracking my mental focus when thoughts of the approaching Salamander broke through my concentration, but every time that happened I conjured up Yusuke's smile, Kurama's warm eyes, Kuwabara's sincere face, and Hiei's viciously protective urges to beat the thought-monster back. Eventually I was able to envision the monk parrot well enough to merge with it, and when I slipped back into the waking world I heard Krishna inhale sharply.

"This form is beautiful," she said, eyes on the tail lying sprawled on the ground. "Much prettier than your normal one."

"Ouch," I said, looking hurt, and she smirked.

"You look more like a Sister with the blue and green," she explained, and that's when I heard the roar.

It started with a low rumble in the back of my teeth and braincase, one that shook my body off balance and made seeing difficult. Loose stones on the cliff rattled as the ground shook in response to the infuriated call, and then Krishna shouted and pointed at the entrance to the chasm.

Four figures sprinted into view, black blurs I knew were the shapes of my friends fleeing from the monster I was supposed to kill. Relief made my eyes blur when I saw that none of them were limping, and they reached the space of ground directly below me without getting caught—

The Salamander surged into the cavern just then, a half mile or so behind the boys, and I scrambled to my feet with my heart in my mouth when I saw the smooth crimson skin and muscled body and sheer _magnitude_ of the creature crammed in so small a space. It could barely fit into the crevice, with no room for it to turn around or spin to face an enemy behind it, but I suppose that was the point of luring there in the first place. The Beast looked even more intimidating up close, scale less and slimy even as its skin dripped molten glass mucus onto the cavern floor. It had the shape of a Chinese dragon without the scales, with four feet tipped in ruby claws and a long body and a thin tail with a club on the end, but is skull was nothing more than a streamlined arrowhead of hot stickiness with an eye the color of white-hot magnesium in the center of its forehead. It had no nostrils or ears or spines, but as I watched the head split down the middle and opened wide, showing teeth of the same ruby glass as its claws, and when it roared spittle like magma sprayed the cavern walls with a hiss and spit of heat. I could feel the heat of it from atop the cliff, but before fear could numb me to the core I surged forward and began to close in on the boys.

"Be ready to jump!" Krishna called, and she shoved me at the cliff. "On my count!"

"OK!" I screamed, freeing the blade from my cane so I could toss the scabbard aside.

"Three!" Krishna bellowed, the Salamander roaring as it charged. The world shook in time to its footfalls, thump, thump, THUMP—

"Two!"

I felt hysterics bubble up, but I pushed them away as the world seemed to slow down and stop.

_No time for fear now, Dani,_ came one incredibly clear thought. Surprisingly, it was my voice that sounded so sure. _Don't let fear rule you. Take the plunge. Just—_

"ONE!"

—_fly._

And that's exactly what I did.

* * *

NOTES:

…

JUST KIDDING!

* * *

I didn't really fly, of course: to quote Buzz Lightyear, I "fell with style." I dove off the cliff and plummeted head-first toward the ground, wind beating into my eyes with unrivaled savagery as it tugged my feathers back and set my nerves to shaking with _eagerness_, and as soon as I felt the wind in my wings the fear that had been taking me over melted away.

I give credit to what happened next to my bird instincts, not any sort of conscious thought-process (I am nowhere near smart enough to discern the physics of flying, thanks so much). I began to slowly spread my wings as I fell, only extending them to their full spread when I felt the wind form an updraft near the cavern's wall, and when I did spread my wings with a satisfying _snap_ the resulting force whipped me head-over-heels and slowed me down into a controlled and floating fall. I kept my arms rigid on either side of my body, good foot pointing at the ground with my bad one tucked underneath me like a fishing flamingo as my wings acted like a parachute, and twitches of my tail kept me on course as I fell in a direct line to the sprinting, screaming, salivating Salamander. The coils of its body roiled behind the head like a flag in a gale, but I ignored it and kept my eyes locked on the white eye in the center of its forehead.

I entered the heat of its aura a few seconds later, the scent of burning feathers hitting me before vanishing, and the air became so thick that my descent slowed to a crawl. But that wouldn't do; I needed more force, more speed! I closed my wings, letting gravity pull me down with greedy fingers, and I grasped my sword in both hands and held it above my head as I plummeted _straight down _without anything to slow me. I saw the Salamander's skull enter the space just below my body as if we were moving underwater, all languid slowness and perfect timing and—

It didn't see me until I was too close, and then a pupil that glowed an orange so bright it was almost white swiveled in my direction, but it was too late. A surge of my tail feathers sent me head-over-heels again, and with all of my weight and the force of my fall behind me I plunged my sword into that furious pupil. Clear liquid bubbled from the piercing with a scream of steam that scalded my face, but then my knees slammed into the eye's whites and my jeans were suddenly soaked through with viscous goo that wasn't hot, just warm and soothing despite the pained bellow the Salamander bugled into the air. Its head snapped back, which felt like the entire world was tipping but I didn't let go of my cane until it snapped its head _forward_, and then my hands came loose because they were slick with goo and I tumbled through the air like a rag doll, but I was too close to the ground to spread my wings and my back collided with the stone so hard I bounced, actually _bounced_, and landed on my stomach instead. I gasped into the ground, tasting stone on my tongue as I _couldn't breathe_, dammit, unable to move because I was sure my hollow bird's bones had shattered, and the ground was rumbling beneath me because the Salamander was roaring, screaming, crying to the sky—

Only, it wasn't crying.

That was just the sound of total silence ringing in my ears.

Seconds later I heard a thump, followed by another, and another, and when I raised my head I saw the Salamander fall, coils crumpling bonelessly to the ground as it filled up the entrance to the chasm with its steaming bulk. The rain evaporated before it hit the hot skin.

The Salamander—that thing that could have crushed me with its mere presence had it not been for all the help I'd been given—was dead.

By my hand.

I rolled onto my back with a gasp, still not able to breathe properly and feeling like every muscle in my body was on fire as rain—I hadn't felt it all during my fall, why hadn't I felt it?—dot my cheeks like tears. Then I heard feet pounding on the ground and the rain stopped hitting me.

"We shouldn't move her until we ascertain whether or not she has suffered any broken bones," I heard Kurama say in a clipped voice, one that told me he expected the worst but didn't want to admit it, and I stopped gasping long enough to smack my clawed hand against the ground.

"Dani? Dani, can you hear me?" Kuwabara said, and when I cracked open my eyes I saw that he had knelt to stare into my face with a look so fearful it was a wonder he was jabbering like an idiot. I know _I_ would have been.

"I—" I gasped, trying to speak despite the fact that I _couldn't freaking breathe_, but Kuwabara shushed me.

"Don't talk!"

I shut my eyes and placed my palms flat on the ground and tried to sit up, and as a result I felt the world spin. But sit up I did, and I started coughing and retching and wheezing for air as hands touched my back and tried to pull me down into a prone position so I wouldn't hurt myself, but I shook them off with a half-snarl, half-cough and reached out my hands until I blindly grabbed hold of something made of cloth, probably a pant leg, and then I pulled myself onto my knees. Hands grabbed my wrists and tried to stop me—voices babbled all around, but I hardly heard them as I clung to whatever it was and used it to stand on legs like jello, or knives, yes knives because they _hurt so much._ I stumbled on my bad foot, of course, because I didn't have my cane but that hardly mattered because I was _alive_, dammit, and I could finally _breathe_, and—

"Dani, stop this," I heard someone growl, and then hands closed over my upper arms like manacles. My eyes flew open at the touch, _I didn't want to be touched right then_, and it was Hiei who was in face with eyes redder than the stupid Salamander and heat that was—

"Oh, hi," I grated out, trying to smile a smile that turned quite obviously into a sob halfway through. I wanted to cover that reaction, of course, it wouldn't do to look like a sissy-pants in front of Hiei, no sirree, and so I said the first thing that came to mind, which happened to be: "How high did I bounce?"

_

* * *

_

NOTES:

_And next we have aftermath, plus enough plot to make you want to scratch your eyes out._

_Hello, people! Sorry for the fake-out note; I just couldn't resist, you know? But anyway, I hope you like the Hunt, though I should probably mention that it's not QUITE over with yet. There are some fun Salamander facts Dani has to explain to the boys that we didn't see get expounded upon in this chapter, so be prepared for that plus more on the Bright Lady and such. _

_And yes, the Bright Lady does indeed have A HELLUVA LOT to do with the plot. She is by no means random. Not at all._

_Anyway. This chapter was SUPER HARD TO WRITE, mainly because I kept getting so excited that I could hardly type and had to run around my room a few times to tire myself out/calm myself down. Typos (there must be dozens) are a direct result of my hyperactivity._

_TALLY YOUNG BLOOD WROTE A POEM about the relationship between Hiei and Dani (and a little Koenma if I'm not mistaken), which is THIS little gem:_

"_A firestorm  
raging hurt and misunderstanding  
Wouldn't a cool breeze be nice  
and a place where you feel at home  
where your settled and calm…..  
…..but what if the storm didn't always rage  
what if it subsided for a bit  
and you were left  
not with burning wounds  
but a warmth exciting yet soothing  
would you take the risk of being burned?  
Or stay settled  
stay within the breeze even though it could never offer more  
or would you ride the firestorm  
risking the burns  
hoping it would subsided  
if only for a moment  
to feel that soothing warmth  
After all don't we thrive under stress?  
Don't diamonds appear under the hardest pressure?  
…..Sadly we can't always settle"_

_I like it and you should compliment her TONS. TONS, I say._

_And MASUYO SHUN drew Dani as a FISH! A link to the marvellousness can be found on my profile so PLEASE GO GIVE HER SOME LOVIN'! _

_I think Dani's the type to get all hyper-ventilation-y as a reaction to an ordeal like that. Hence her reaction. To the Salamander. Oh boy, I'm repeating myself. TIME TO GO._

_American Senpai, MusicFiend666, Kai-Chan94, Wings of Silver Rain, WillowLeaf2560, Dreamehz, DoilyRox, StrawberryxXxKisses, Kaiya's Watergarden, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares, j.d.y., Miyakomono, Angel of Randomosity, chocolateluvr13, Supreme Baka, Mihakuu, Foxgirl Ray, Masuyo Shun, SillyGoddessDisco, Rain Chant, itsallaboutbob, loser94, Koryu Elric, destinyswindow, colbub, HeeHee01, shishifearme, etowa-ru, Reiko, darkravensnight, TallyYoungBlood, hieisdarkdragonchick, AkaMizu-chan, Reclun, dude where's my spirit gun, Reality Bores Me, yumchaitea, 0nfateswings, Snowgirl7589, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, ShadowFireFox13, Eggbert 3000, ohhTaylorJade, and RoyalMistress ARE ALL TOTALLY MY IDOLS FOR BEING AWESOME. AND STUFF. I WILL FIGHT A SALAMANDER FOR YOU SHOULD YOU WISH IT. NO JOKE. DEAR GOD I NEED TO GO TO BED I HAVEN'T SLEPT SINCE FRIDAY I DON'T EVEN—_

_(*dies of exhaustion*) _


	48. Chapter 48: I'm Not OK, I Promise

Future Talk

Chapter 48:

"I'm Not OK, I Promise"

* * *

Since I have trouble remembering just what happened after I somehow managed to bring down a ten-ton Salamander with a blade little more deadly than a kitchen knife, I'll stick to kinda-sorta-summarizing, thank you very much.

Basically, it ran a little something like this: The 'hype-up potion' the Grand Mother had put on my forehead during the blessing ceremony was too much for my stupid, puny body to handle, and I freaked out. The adrenaline from the encounter with the Salamander had dulled the potion's euphoric effects while I was in the midst of battle, but as soon as the adrenaline wore off and I found myself in the safe and comforting presences of Hiei, Kurama, Kuwabara, and Yusuke, I regressed into a chatty, bouncing mess of compliments, awkward truths, and an attention span so short it would turn ADD's poster child into a trembling, crying mess of envy.

Krishna explained all of this to me (though in terms that were a lot less flippant) after she and the boys somehow managed to make me sit down on a nearby boulder. I kept trying to get up and go look at the Salamander while she explained it all—"Look at it, it's just so _pretty_ even though it's _dead_!" I kept saying—and when Kuwabara actually made to hold me down by grabbing my arms (which were featherless, because my shapeshift had shattered sometime after I managed to stand up after being thrown from the Salamander's back) he pulled back with a startled yelp.

"She's burning up!" he said, and when Krishna heard my giddy translation of his words she just shrugged. I didn't question why she didn't seem bothered by her close proximity to 'my men,' but then again, I was pretty much high so who can blame me?

"The potion raises the warrior's body heat so they can resist being burned by the Salamander," she explained. I told the boys a bouncing rendition of this but they still looked skeptical, so she followed that up with: "I called for the others, to tell them you had succeeded. A healer will be along soon."

And she was right—a few minutes later a troop of Riders with passengers behind them spilled over the cavern walls, some gliding down while some chose to climb the sheer cliff face instead. Most of them made beelines toward the Salamander's steaming body, but one Rider detached from the others to join us. Karla slid out of the saddle while Sarka stayed seated on her perch, and as Karla approached me and put the back of her hand to my forehead, the Rider shot Krishna a loaded look and said: "Orimand fell."

My memory supplied an image of a flat, muscular face and an intimidating warhammer. "You mean the one with the muscles?" I said with a gasp, and I felt my eyes well with tears. Every emotion that flashed into my head felt as intense as a lightning strike.

"She faced the Sacred Animal head on," Sarka said slowly. Krishna's chest swelled as she held her breath, eyes cold. "It trampled her. She will live, but it will take a long time for her to recover." A grim smile. "She managed to fell the Animal, despite her injuries."

"A true Sister to the end," Karla murmured as she cupped my face in her hands and examined me (I think I told her she smelled nice). To Krishna, she said: "The dose was too strong. You can tell from her pupils. She won't sleep for at least a day at this rate."

"Maybe that's good," Krishna grunted. "The honoring of the warriors will make her wish to retire, and quickly. It is good if she tires herself now so she can rest well later."

"True," Karla said. Her fingers prodded at my left cheekbone, then my jawline, then the bridge of my nose. "Did that hurt?"

"Not at all!" I chirped, fidgeting in her hands.

"It should have," she said dryly. "You have cuts in those places." She reached into a pack slung around her shoulders and pulled out a familiar jar of salve. "Hold still."

That was easier said than done, but luckily for me the other Riders had started in one the Salamander.

Fascinated in a distant sort of way, I watched as they took knives to the creature's steaming flesh and, with much chanting and soft singing, began to strip the flesh from its bones. Each cut streamed clear gel that other Sisters caught in jars and bowls, and the meat was carefully packaged into brown earthenware jars with cork stoppers. Three Sisters cut at the creature's eye and drew as much fluid from it as they could, and others worked on freeing the bones from the ruined flesh. The bones themselves were beautiful: a deep, scintillating ruby red that you could see straight through, like scarlet glass blown into the shape of bones so strong they could never, ever break. Karla let me stare at the workers with an open mouth as she patched me up, because watching them was the only thing keeping me still and focused in my otherwise erratic state.

"You're done," the healer said at last, and I tried hopping to my foot before she gently pushed me back down. "Go back to your camp and rest. Your work for today is done."

* * *

Krishna and her cavalry took us back to the little island not long after that.

"Pack clothing for an overnight trip," were the warrior's parting words. "You and your men, both. We will come to fetch you at dusk."

So after that, all we could do was sit and wait.

Well, the boys sat. I paced because I couldn't sit without jiggling my leg so hard my entire body trembled, so the boys took their usual places around the fire in our weird house-thing as I crossed, recrossed, and crossed the house again. My fingers trembled whenever I let go of my cane, and even though Kurama gently suggested (read: tried to force me bodily but backed off when I threatened to call the Sisters) that I bathe in order to clean the Salamander goop out of my skin and hair, I refused.

For some reason, the congealing slime felt… comforting. Warm. Safe.

Dangerous.

"I can't believe you didn't tell us about everything beforehand," Kuwabara muttered.

"Oh, you weren't in any danger," I said, laughing. Their heads followed my path around the room.

"No danger?" Yusuke said, gaping. "No _danger_? What else do you call getting chased by a monster the size of a whale?"

I rounded on them, grinning from ear to ear. "The Sisters assured me that the minute, the second, the _instant_ it looked like you guys might get hurt, that they'd _swoop in_—" I punctuated the word 'swoop' with a huge flailing of my arms, "—and recue you, like some sort of tag-team blue-woman Batman and Robin!"

"Who?" said Kuwabara.

I beamed at him. "You're more like Robin than Batman. Better catchphrases." I stopped walking long enough to raise my hands and wiggle my fingers in the air. "Holy cheese and crackers, Batman! Like that!"

He glanced at Yusuke. "That stuff they put her on must really be something," he murmured.

"Definitely," said Yusuke.

"And why did you think we shouldn't know that we were to be… bait?" Kurama asked silkily.

I laughed aloud. "This is where it gets _so funny_," I giggled, spinning as pirouette on my good foot. "Those Salamander things are really, really weird, you know?"

"We know," Kuwabara and Yusuke chorused in bored tones.

"They sense intentions," I said, picking up my pacing once more. "Like, they sense what you want to do and stuff. Isn't that _weird_?"

"So they could sense that we were going to run if we knew what we were up against?" Kurama said, eyebrows knitting together.

"That's right!"

"Then why didn't it sense your intention to jump down and kill it?"

I laughed again, which made the boys look collectively confused. "It's because I'm a _girl_!" I said.

"I sense this is becoming a theme," Kuwabara said, a vein pulsing in his temple.

"A girl!" I continued. "The Salamanders are all chicks and they _like_ girls and won't sense their emotions because they trust them on instinct, but they hate boys because they just _do_ and if there's a guy in the area they tune out the girls and focus in on the men! Isn't that just _crazy_? It's why they gotta use guys as bait, because otherwise—"

"Otherwise, the creatures would focus on the women and make killing the Salamanders impossible," Kurama said softly. He put a hand to his temple and grimaced. "I see. No wonder the Salamander came after us so eagerly."

Hiei, who had been motionless and reserved until that point, let out a low growl.

"'Eagerly'?" I quoted, with hand motions and everything. "It came after you 'eagerly'?"

They all exchanged looks.

Slowly, more slowly than I had done anything all day, I said: "Why do I feel like the word 'eager' is loaded when it's _you guys_ saying it?"

Rather than explain, Kurama just looked at Hiei. "Would you mind showing her?"

My metaphorical ears perked up. "Show? Like a movie?" I practically skipped to the fire and threw myself onto a cushion, belly pressed to the ground as I pillowed my chin on my palms like an expectant schoolgirl. "Anyone for popcorn?" I said, heels kicking at the air behind me.

Hiei wasn't as psyched as I was, though I couldn't imagine why. His eyes narrowed, looking at Kurama with hidden meanings burning in places I couldn't see. "Are you certain that's wise?" he said.

Kurama shrugged. "Wise, no. Necessary, yes. I don't feel like her attention span is intact enough to listen to the entire story."

Hiei regarded him for a few moments, probably weighing the value of making a counterargument. In the end, however, he just got up, walked over to me, and knelt.

"I want to see what happened to _you_ in exchange," he said quietly.

I smiled as prettily as I could manage. "Be my guest!"

He placed his hand over my face a moment later.

* * *

_Dani's hair—blonde; I didn't like it—shone almost white in the sun. She thought she had a good disguise, if her triumphant grin after she made her transformation was any indication, but she really didn't. That new face (her mother's face, I remembered) just looked like hers, only older. Would she look like that in a hundred years? Less? More? What was her lifespan, really, since her soul belonged to a human but her body smelled and screamed 'demon!' through and through?_

_Knowing her, such thoughts had probably never crossed her mind. She wasn't the type to think in the long-term, not when so much occupied the short. Though jumpy from nerves, she seemed calm enough when Krishna directed their mount down a different path than my own, and she twisted in the saddle to look at us one last time. Blue eyes tracked our faces. The color was unnaturally cold against her skin, a far cry from Dani's typical warm brown. _

_After that last look, I didn't watch Dani go down her path. _

_I had my own to follow._

_The Sisters escorted us to an edge of the island, one far from where we started, and once we reached the banks of the hot lake we were not asked to climb up onto one of their saddled beasts. Instead, we stood on the shore for a little less than an hour, until a rumble I could feel in the soles of my feet shook the ground and the waters before us seemed to part._

No. They're receding,_ I realized when I saw the boulders surface out of the lake. The Sisters did not offer to carry us across them, letting us jump from rock to rock on our own. Kuwabara nearly slipped once; Yusuke, lucky for the dolt, was close enough to catch him._

_Crossing took more time than I thought it should have, but Kurama warned me not to overtake the stupid women. "Let them lead," he said before we even started. "Just follow and stay out of their way. No sense causing any trouble."_

I _had to suppress a snort at that. Several of the riding Sisters had taken pains to get in _my_ way, to jab at me with spears as if I had walked too slowly in their wake. Payback for the Sister I'd injured in the ambush, no doubt._

_Across the water, we came upon a beach of stones that lay at the base of a cliff. The cliff was tall, far taller than any I had seen in recent memory, and I scowled when I saw the Riders surge directly up the wall like it was little more than a gentle hill. _

_"If they expect Kuwabara to be able to climb up that without assistance," I remarked when they made no move to carry us up the incline, "they will be severely disappointed."_

_Neither Kuwabara nor Yusuke seemed to hear me, but green eyes behind a mental mask dipped my way, then to the side. I followed Kurama's wordless cue and glanced in that direction, only to see that four riders had remained on the beach with us. It did not surprise me when they surrounded our party, spears raised, and shepherded our group farther along the beach._

_We walked in silence until we came upon a crevice in the cliff's face. The Sisters made us walk into the yawning black, and the hairs on the back of my neck rose when I felt the hot steam inside saturate my clothing to the skin. The claws of their mounts clicked behind us along the stone floor as we passed deep into the cavern, and black so dark even my eyes became useless pressed in from all directions. Kuwabara muttered to himself, a refrain of 'I hate tight place, I hate tight places,' hissing along the walls. We were lucky the floor was smooth and that the tunnel did not narrow; I didn't relish the thought of picking up after those with feet less sure than my own. _

_When we walked in pitch darkness for almost an hour without showing any signs of stopping, I stretched out my energy until it engulfed Kurama, then Kuwabara, and finally Yusuke, who walked in front. They hummed with cobalt, orange, and green energies that shone loudly enough to find with ease, and I hissed in my own red-on-violet tones: _Kurama. What can you smell?

Water,_ came his response. _It's in the air. And char, underneath that, like boiling stone.

Any sign of Dani?_ Yusuke asked._

None,_ Kurama's mind said, and I felt my teeth clench at that. Where _was_ she?_

Oh man,_ said Kuwabara. _I wish she'd told us more about this 'Hunt' thing. I mean, I get that she must have her reasons and everything, but sometimes I think she takes herself way too seriously for her own good.

_A large part of me agreed, but I didn't say so. I didn't want the oaf's head to swell._

Kuwabara,_ Kurama thought sharply. He was not of our opinion… on the surface. Deep down, I could sense he agreed more than he let on. _

Well, she does! _the psychic thought, hot orange pulsing in agitation._ She's my friend and everything, but sometimes she really needs to just chill out.

You're only saying that because you're afraid of the dark, doofus, _Yusuke chimed in, devious teasing making his energy tremble like a chuckle, and they began to bicker before I let my connecting energy ripple and growl. I was more than willing to disconnect them if they didn't shut up._

_Kurama's energy tensed, suddenly, going from fresh green to the color of a paranoid swamp. _There are demons up ahead, _he said,_ but his steps did not falter.

_My hand went to the sword at my side on reflex._ How far?

A hundred meters_, he said._ There are six of them. They're stationary, waiting…

Think this is our stop? _Yusuke joked._

_But Kurama was not in the mood to humor him._ It's not just the Sisters, _he thought._ Four of them are male. And all of them are strong.

_Tension made our four-way connection pulse in the air; I wondered if the Sisters merely didn't sense us, or were just writing us off as beneath their notice. Neither prospect made me like them more than I already didn't. _

_Kurama's mental voice registered no surprise when he added: _And one of them appears to be… human.

_Yusuke went from tense to excited in a second. _Think that's Ryu?_ he asked, and laughed. _I sure hope so. I've been waiting to kick that bastard's ass ever since the freaking hotel.

_I just growled to show my support. No use letting the detective's head swell, either._

As have I, but I can't be sure it's him with just my nose,_ said Kurama. _I could only smell the breadflowers the last time we met, so his scent is unfamiliar_. A pause, then: _Hiei?

_I didn't need to be asked; a hint was more than enough. I severed the connection in an instant, finding myself alone in the dark again as I pushed out a light static blanket of my own energy and let it wash over the tunnel. Behind us trailed the four Sisters from before, energies alive with blues and greens of different shades, but they weren't what I was after so I passed them over. They made no sign of having felt me as I pushed my energy forward, letting it precede us down the tunnel in a rolling wave. _

_I found the six energy signature bobbing ahead of us: the two in shades of blue and green felt familiar, like a variation on a theme that I was sure meant 'more Sisters', but the other four were unfamiliar. A quick assessment of their power levels revealed that none of them measured up to us in strength, but then I looked closer. One shone a pale-yellow gold with a deep blue heart; this was easily the strongest demon, though I sensed little by way of intelligence radiating from steady, dull flicker of his soul. Another simmered quietly with a black energy interlaced with silver sparks; likely he was some sort of shadow demon or wraith given the way his power seemed to flinch in and out of sight like a plume of smoke, and from this one boiled a controlled malice and cunning I made note of. A third demon had red energy, flame-like and surreal, but the only heat in it came from a high-pitched peal of energized emotion. Not a fire demon, then, but a man with an enflamed soul._

_All three energies pulsed against mine when I touched them, because I had left my inquiry bold and unhidden. They'd see us soon; no use hiding in the dark. The red and the two-tone shot me bolts of welcome and companionship, but the black one merely gave me the emotional equivalent of an assessing stare. _

_The last energy signature, however, was a different story._

_It was an idiotic shade of pale purple, for one thing. I would have laughed had it not been burning as intensely as it was, and had undertones of darkness and silver not made the laughable periwinkle shadow in on itself with a hidden depth I could barely begin to see the bottom of, I'm sure I would have shot this man a harsh thought of derision. Such a vapid color; would his soul reflect the same?_

_He was concentrating so hard on something that he did not feel me until I was almost upon him. His power shuddered in surprise when I roughly barreled into him. He thrust out a tendril of his own power to meet mine civilly in the middle, a human handshake if there ever was one, but when he felt me he recoiled with a snap. _

_It became clear, then, that this man recognized me. _

_It then became even clearer that this man was not what I expected._

_I did not anticipate him opening up to me, letting me feel the landscape of his emotions the way a friend would only let another friend feel. There was surprise in his emotional palette, surprise tempered with resigned acceptance, but below that was a warning—a warning to stay away, to not come any closer, but below that I sensed no threats or bloodlust or ill will._

_I didn't like that. A warning with no motive did not sit well._

_And then he tried to touch _me_._

_I pushed away from his mind, and sudden rage made my aura burn sharper. I had not invited him in; just because he had let me see so freely into his soul, like the naïve amateur he was, didn't mean I would allow him the same privilege. _

No one_ touched my mind without my permission—no one. I'd killed lesser men for that slight._

_Using the rage as a driving hammer, I beat him back with a sharp blow that would have left someone of weaker resolve reeling. He pulled away, shocked that I had rejected him (_Idiot_, I sneered, loudly enough for him to hear) and then, as if gaining courage in only an instant, he lashed out and smashed a mental punch of his own into me._

_Ryu had good control, for a human—oh yes, I knew it was Ryu the minute his blow hit home, because the odor of humanity and an obsessive tinge of want and need made him resonate in a way I was all too familiar with. His punch was solid and well-planned, slipping past my first layer of defenses like a snake. He wasn't quite quick enough to get past the second layer I threw into place, but the fact that a mere human had managed to get past me at all was (grudgingly) impressive. I shoved him out with a well-placed smash of my energy and retracted my mind to where he could not follow, and then I reestablished the connection with Kurama, Kuwabara, and Yusuke._

It's Ryu,_ I said, and Yusuke let out a joyed war cry._

* * *

_The cavern had two entrances. A ball of smokeless fire floated halfway between the floor and the ceiling, casting enough light to see by. As soon as we entered the room, the Sisters rolled a boulder over the entrance we had used. The other door was similarly blocked._

_Ryu and the other men leaned against the walls, watching us. None of them wore masks, and Ryu was the first to speak._

_"This is Renji," he said in a voice that suggested nothing more than good-natured friendship. He pointed one finger at a male demon leaning on the wall by the second entrance, a massive brute with a lion's mane and a furred muzzle. "That's Tomou," he continued, gesturing at a narrow, grinning man with a braid of fiery red hair, "and that's Kore." Kore had solid black skin and silver hair, and if you looked at him long enough his features melded into an ashy tumble. "You all know _me_, of course."_

_"Damn right we do," Yusuke snapped, stepping forward and ripping off his mask. "We're taking you in, buddy."_

_Ryu raised an eyebrow at this. As one, the other three demons shot us dark looks._

_"Unwise," the human replied. His bright hair fell into his eyes; he swept it back with a hand. "My friends will fight you. In close quarters, we might all be killed." _

_"Oh really," Yusuke drawled. "And what if I don't believe you?"_

_The lion demon and the redheaded one glanced at Kore, who appeared to be smirking. _

_"Listen to him, Yusuke," Kurama murmured from behind me. The fox walked to Yusuke's side, mask dangling from his hand, and said: "Kore, here, is a smoke demon."_

Leave it to Kurama_, I thought._

_Yusuke remained as ignorant of demonic lineage as ever. "So?"_

_"So if he wanted to, he could turn to smoke and burn out our lungs from the inside," Kurama said in his most pleasant voice, the one I knew meant he was at his most dangerous. "A threatening man in an airtight room like this, though in the open I am sure he would not be quite so intimidating." _

_Kore just shrugged. Renji rolled his eyes and sank against the wall, clawed fingers rasping together as they sharpened themselves against their fellows._

_"Smart move," said the lion demon. He was cocky. I wanted to hit him. _

_"Very smart," said Ryu. A wave of his hand made the other demons visibly relax. "Please, sit down. We have a rather long wait ahead of us."_

_His flippant attitude grated on my nerves. "You know something about this 'Hunt' we don't?" I snapped._

_Cool purple eyes turned in my direction, and he looked me up and down with a wry smile. The others had begun to sit down since there didn't seem to be any alternatives, but I remained standing._

_"No more than you do, I'm afraid" Ryu said, apologetic tone sounding sincere. My teeth ground together. This was no time for civility. "Men are not permitted to know much ahead of time. Hogosha insists that it's necessary." He laughed a little. "I can't see why, but hey, I trust her."_

_"Too bad I don't trust you, _or_ her," I snapped. "You're the enemy. Just because we're stuck here together doesn't change that."_

_Kurama shot me a loaded look. "No one said it did, Hiei," he said._

_I just glared._

_Ryu shrugged. "I wish you'd forget about what happened in the hotel for the time being," he said, smiling at Kurama since the fox seemed, on the surface, like the most likely to listen. "My presence here has nothing to do with our… quarrel." He let out a laugh. It seemed genuine. "Really, falling in with the Sisters was total overkill on your part. A covert infiltration would have been more effective, and I was going to come back soon anyway." He wagged a finger at us. "You put yourselves in unnecessary danger."_

_"Like you care?" Kuwabara grumbled._

_Ryu's look softened. I found myself hating him. Who was he to patroni—_

_"Of course I care," he said, stopping my thoughts cold. "I don't want people getting hurt on my account."_

_Yusuke's snort made Ryu's calm benevolence crack a little; purple eyes narrowed. _

_"Buddy, I'm calling bullshit on that one," Yusuke said. He pointed a lazy finger in Ryu's direction; the psychic obviously didn't know the power packed into the finger because he made no move to get out from under the range of Yusuke's potential Spirit Gun. "Those weird dog things you sicked on us? Yeah, the worst of the bruises took a few _days_ to heal. And considering _my_ constitution, that's not what I call gentle."_

_"I only called them because you were being belligerent," Ryu protested. "I'm trying to create a perfect world—you could all have a part in it if you'd only let me do as I wish."_

_"You're creating it at a high cost," Kurama said softly. "We don't quite know how high, of course, but the Spirit World—"_

_"—is run by a troop of ignorant fools," Ryu snapped, and his kindness crumbled completely. Hands clenched atop his folded knees, and then he slammed one palm flat on the stone floor. "People are made differently and prejudices tear them apart because of this. If Spirit World would only intervene and make everyone the same—"_

_"—the world would be boring!" Yusuke griped. Before Ryu had a chance to respond, the detective added: "And we didn't mean to get mixed up with these Sister ladies, OK? We wanted _you_ and got roped into it on accident." He snorted. "Blame Dani, actually. She saved our hides but got us stuck here in the bargain. There's a saying about mixed religion or something; I don't know."_

_"Mixed blessings?" Kurama supplied._

_"Yeah, that," said Yusuke. He crossed his arms behind his head and lay down on the ground. "Big fat mess if you ask me, but hey, at least we're alive. I just don't know how long that'll last."_

_Ryu, meanwhile, had frozen quite still. I watched his every gesture as I leaned against the wall, arms folded over my chest and legs crossed at the ankle. I kept ready to move even though I cultivated a relaxed appearance, but Ryu made no such attempts. His eyes had opened wide, jaw clenching and unclenching in a strained rhythm as a vein appeared at his temple._

_"You did," he said, "leave her with the Sisters, right?" _

"_And what if we didn't?" Kuwabara asked._

_His voice was more strained than his locked-up shoulders. "Tell me," he said. "Tell me now—_is she with the Sisters_?"_

_"Yes," said Kurama. "She is a participant in the Hunt." Green eyes turned to slits. "Should we be alarmed?"_

_Ryu let out a pent-up breath. "No," he said, visibly relieved with sagging shoulders. "Not if she's with _them_. Alone, you could worry, but with the Sisters she should be safe."_

_"Safe from who?" I asked. "You? Your friends?" I tossed my head, glaring. "You won't have her, if that's what you mean."_

_Ryu laughed. "And _you_ will?" he asked lightly. "Hate to say it, but none of us will if he gets his way."_

_My mouth did not sound dry when I spoke, even though it was. "Who?" I growled, and I pushed away from the wall. Kurama murmured to calm down in a low voice. "If who gets his way?"_

_Solemn voiced, he said: "You know who."_

_"Seishou?" Kurama guessed. He rose slowly to his feet, walking to my side so he could place a hand on my shoulder. "Calm down," he said quietly. _

_I shrugged him off. "Don't touch me," I snarled, and Kurama's annoyed expression disappeared as quickly as it came. He opened his mouth to say something, something bad if the look in his eye was any indication, and—_

_The human's voice snapped through the air, breaking the moment before it could come to fruition. "A warning," he said, looking between the four of us in turn. "There is more to this place than meets the eye."_

_Temper flared. This was no time for games. "What in the world is _that_ supposed to mean?" I snapped._

_But Ryu was not intimidated, not like I wanted him to be. "Allow me to clarify," he amended. "There is more to _Dani's involvement_ with this place than meets the eye."_

_I went still. Kurama touched my shoulder again, fingers gripping tight through my cloak. I did not pull away._

"_She knows nothing, of course," Ryu went on. He looked as if he were apologizing for stepping on someone's foot, full lips pulled into a defenseless half-smile, and he talked about _her_ like the two of them were familiar. I knew enough about humans to know that his lack of an honorific—a 'san', a 'chan' even a 'kun'—meant that he thought of her in a close way. _

_My blood, which had been hot to begin with, nearly boiled at the memory of him leaning close, pressing his—_

_Ryu didn't notice my short, harsh snarl as the memory of Dani's memory made me picture flaying him alive. "It's a shame, but it's true," he said. "Her roots run deeper here than anyone can imagine, least of all Dani herself."_

"_If you mean the thing about her mother being an ex-Sister, we know that she just ma—," Yusuke said, and he would have told Ryu that Dani had made the whole thing up had I not blurted: "Yusuke! Quiet!"_

_He looked at the other male demons in the room, the ones who were, apparently, property of the other Sisters. "Right," he said, sheepish, and I turned back to Ryu._

"_Tell me what you know," I said, keeping my voice soft. "I'll cut out your heart, otherwise." I considered doing it anyway, but he knew too much to account for that waste._

_The psychic only shook his head. "You won't, and I can't tell you anything. I only know a little, anyway." The pained look on his face was something I relished. "But I can give you a warning."_

"_Which would be?"_

"_To leave. As soon as you can." He licked his lips. "Before nightfall, even. Because if _he_ gets his way, Dani won't live to see dawn."_

_My hand twitched to my sword beneath my cloak. My breathing stilled. "Is that a threat?" I asked, quiet. Kurama's aura registered alarm, cool anger, and a touch of battle-ready eagerness as he shifted to a firmer stance at my side. _

_Ryu shook his head. "It's a warning," he said. "I'll try my best to see that it's a needless one, but I had to give it to you anyway. If everything goes according to _his_ plans—" _

_"You mean _Seishou's_ plans?" I asked with a sneer. "I'm assuming he's the 'he' you keep mentioning."_

_"I don't think I should say," he said, but in his eye flashed a conspiratorial glimmer._

"_I'm thinking that's a yes," murmured Kuwabara._

"_Supposing that we _are_ talking about Seishou," Ryu went on, "believe me when I say that Dani will be used to further his goals, and then discarded." Another wry smile. "I don't think I need to explain the 'discarded' euphemism." _

_"He'll kill her," Kurama said. _

_"Yeah," said Ryu. He swallowed, composure cracking once again. "He'll kill her."_

_"Why does he want her?" Kuwabara asked. Kurama shot him an approving look; the question was an important one, and my deeply hidden fondness—or tolerance, at least—for Kuwabara shimmered. _

_Ryu spread his hands. "That's the mystery of the century, isn't it?"_

_Kuwabara: "You mean you don't know? I thought you and Seishou were working together!"_

_A shrug. "We are. Our goals only overlap in some areas, however, and I am not privy to his private ones."_

_"Well, why?"_

_"You think I'd share everything with my enemy?" Ryu said, grinning despite his stark words. _

_Kuwabara gaped, but then his eyes narrowed. "Hey, and if you're working with Seishou, why are you telling us all this, anyway? Are you a double agent or something?"_

_Ryu shook his head. "I'm telling you this because I like Dani despite how she thinks of me, not because I owe you anything, and once I say _this_ I will not say anything else." He looked at Kuwabara, then Yusuke, then Kurama, and then he stared at me. Our gazes locked as he said: "Some of this is conjecture on my part, but some of it I know is true. Make of it what you will, OK?"_

"_Get on with it," I said. _

_Ryu didn't break our gaze. "Seishou has an invested interest in the Sisters. I have no idea why. But Dani's tie to America is connected to the Sisters in some way, and that is why he wants her." His face was handsome and human, and I hated it. "I know you want to stop both me and Seishou, but I'm really the lesser of two evils. Stop Seishou first, and stop him by protecting this place, these people, and Dani. All of them are important, but only until he uses them and decides they're no longer necessary."_

_Silence followed that. Ryu held my gaze for one last moment, then dropped it to stare at the floor._

_In his aura, I saw relief._

_"Well this is great," Yusuke grumbled, and he rolled to face the wall. "I thought we were stuck here with one psycho, but now we know that there're _two_ on the loose and that one of them is after the most defenseless person I've ever met!" He heaved a dramatic sigh. "This just keeps getting better and better…"_

_"I'm _not_ psychotic," Ryu said, looking up with a scowl. "Why do people keep saying that?"_

_"Because you're taking over the world, stupid," Kuwabara snorted. "Every evil villain is a psycho. It's just a fact of life."_

_"It won't be when I'm done," Ryu said firmly, and he smiled. _

_Not for the first time, or the last, I imagined what running him through with my sword would feel like. _

_I imagined it would feel good, if not for his care for Dani._

_Then I thought about it more, and decided it would just feel good._

* * *

I surfaced from Hiei's memory blinking like an owl in the daytime. Hiei's eyes had narrowed into thin red slits, and he said: "You're a fool, Dani."

The insult rolled off my back, not like it usually would have. My sigh sounded like bullets. "And even after I went to all the trouble of _covering_ for you and everything!" I moaned, and I flopped back against the cushions to roll around like a restless dog. "I lied about your names to keep Hogosha from hearing them, and what do you guys do? You see Ryu! What is this world coming to?"

Silence, and then Kurama said: "You aren't alarmed?"

I sat up to look at him, pushing blonde hair from my eyes. "Why the hell would I be?" I asked, chipper, and then a memory made me look at Hiei with a pout. "You don't like me as a blonde?" I said, voice shaking, and I felt sadness well up behind my eyes. "But I was expressly told by Marilyn Monroe that blondes have more fun! How can you just shatter my world like this, Hiei!"

Hiei looked at me like I had gone wacko—which I totally understand in retrospect, though in that moment I totally didn't.

"You, you kind of seem to be missing the point," Kuwabara said. He sat nearby and put a hand on my shoulder. The action was a bit hesitant, like he was afraid of touching me. "So, um, stop crying about your hair, OK?"

Mystified, I looked into his kind, blocky face and asked: "Crying?"

"Um, yeah." He fidgeted. "Y'know, tears and stuff?"

I put my fingers to my face and looked at them; they were wet. "Whoa!" I said, staring at the moisture. "I mean, _whoa_! When did _that_ happen?"

Kuwabara snapped his face toward Kurama. "When is this drug going to wear off? She's kind of scaring me."

"Like a ghost!" was my opinion, and I cackled before hopping to my feet and starting to pace again. "BOO! And suchlike." I stumbled, but caught myself. "Dude, my head feels like it's floating!"

And it really did. The stuff the Sisters had given me made it feel like my legs and arms were coated in muscle I didn't have; it made me feel like I had sparklers attached to my ankles and wrists, ones that could help me fly if I angled them correctly. I felt like I could hurdle a skyscraper or bench-press a car, or at least walk around the room a few times without my cane-arm cramping up so hard I had to sit down, like usual. My head was filled with cotton that muffled feelings even as it trapped them inside to fester and get turned into things they didn't really represent.

Does any of that make sense? If not, I hope this does: I was dramatic and invincible.

"Dani, do you understand what Ryu told us?" Kurama asked patiently. Hiei had moved to sit down, but he was watching me through narrow eyes.

"Yup!" I said, pacing. "Seishou's here and he wants me for spooky reasons that are totally unknown." I paused, thought about it, and said: "It's probably because I'm awesome, but what-the-hell-ever!"

"He wants to kill you, Dani," Kurama said, enunciating each syllable.

"Oh, pssht!" I said, waving a hand at him with a grin. "Puh-lease, Kurama, chill!"

Yusuke's face looked like a tomato when he blurted: "Why the hell aren't you freaking out? You _always_ freak out! And now you're being threatened with death and you're just as happy as can be!" He hopped to his feet, walked right up to me, and pointed an index finger at my nose. "YOU COULD DIE, DANI!" he bellowed in his most lovable Yusuke-is-pissy-but-still-funny voice, and his crazed face made me giggle. "DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?"

"Say it, don't spray it!" I laughed. "And no, I can't die, stupid! I'm too _alive_ to be dead!" I spun away from him, arms around my chest. "I've never felt this _awake_ before, you know? Like colors are brighter and the air is so nice—" I took a deep breath to illustrate my point. "It's awesome!"

"Kurama," I heard Kuwabara say urgently, "she really is scaring me. I don't think she's OK."

"Neither do I," Kurama said. "Perhaps if I put her to sleep, she can sleep it off—"

I rounded on them, anger flashing into existence in an instant. "I'm _fine_!" I snapped. "Totally _fine_, OK? I mean _really_, I must be fine if I took down a Salamander a billion times bigger than me." The anger vanished. "Did you see me?" I gushed, grinning like a maniac. "I jumped, like _whoosh_ with the feathers and everything!" I mimed jumping and flapping my arms, oblivious of their growing concern. I was too caught up in my own memory, the feel of the flight and the blade and— "And then I fell and the Salamander got closer and closer and then it looked at me, you know? It _looked_ at me!" I held my cane over my head the same way I held the blade. "And so I just let gravity take me, and I just sank the sword into—"

It felt like getting hit with a brick. One moment I was seeing the blade sparkling in the sun, all courage and bravado and adrenaline, and the next I saw the creature's eye staring at me, _trusting_ me, because there was nothing in that eye but trust from one female to another, just a bright orange pupil that said _who are you, and why_—

"I just sank the sword, into…" I said, breath coming quicker. "Into…"

The cane fell from my numb fingers.

"Oh my god," I said. "I killed it." I looked up at the boys. They were standing, but still. "I killed it?"

"You did," Kurama said softly.

My hands slowly drifted to my mouth. They were shaking. "I… killed it." I paused, rocking, and said: "It… it never did anything to me." When none of them answered, I pressed: "Why did I kill it, it didn't do anything to me, _it didn't do anything to_—"

Everything became a blur. "Hiei, grab her," Kurama said, and the next thing I knew was a pair of hot arms around my body and a broad shoulder, and I pressed my face into in and let a sob like a scream rip out of my mouth, and then my arms came up and I was grabbing Hiei like I was trying to force myself into him, and then—

"What is that drug _doing_ to her?" Kuwabara was saying, "Put her to sleep, now!", and I was crying so hard my eyes ached. Hiei's arms were hot, warm, on fire, and then they reminded me of the Salamander's heat and I shoved away from him with a gasp, but he held on tight until I let out a hoarse scream of his name and slammed as hard as I could. With a rush of cool air came a moment of stunning clarity, and before he could grab me again I froze, hand out, trying to hold him off with nothing but my palm. I went silent in a millisecond, sobs vanishing into utter blankness.

"I," I said, not looking at anyone, "want to take a bath."

"Dani," Hiei said, but I took a breath and spoke on.

"I want to take a bath," I said, "and I want to wash off the Salamander's blood. Then I want to take a nap." A pregnant pause made my stillness ripple, but then it came rushing in to fill the void of my emotions. "I'm OK, I promise. I just want to take a bath, wash off the Salamander's blood, and sleep."

"I _think_ she might be in shock," Yusuke said.

I repeated: "All I want is a bath. Alone. To wash off the blood. Please. Afterward, a nap. I'm OK, I promise." I took two steps forward, chanting those words like a mantra. "I want to take a bath. Alone. I—"

"She shouldn't be by herself," Kuwabara said, and then Hiei was in front of me. I saw his boots first, and then his eyes and mine were together and I couldn't look away.

"I want to take a bath," I said thickly, "to wash off the Salamander's blood."

It took a minute for him to think about that, but then he nodded. Red eyes turned Kurama's way. "Get me her things," he said.

"Hiei—"

"Do it," Hiei hissed, but it was Yusuke who tossed over my backpack. Hiei slung it across his shoulder before grabbing my free wrist and pulling me after him, caneless and stumbling.

"I want… alone," I said, because that was all I could manage and Hiei spun, arm snaking around my upper thighs, and then he lifted and pulled me to him before I could protest. I saw the boys' faces before I pressed my face into Hiei's hair and wound my arms around his neck, and when I opened them again we were in the bathroom, flying past the door on the other side, and careening down the stairs so fast I thought for sure we'd slip and die.

When we reached the bottom pool Hiei set me down, tossed my backpack to the ground, and turned back to me. I thought he would say something and leave, but instead he just grabbed me roughly around the waist and lifted, walking straight into the pool without removing clothes or shoes or anything. He waded into until the water hit his hips before dropping me without any kind of warning at all, and I fell into the water with a splash. Water closed over my head, but just as I started to reflexively inhale a hand wound into the back of my tank top and heaved me out. I coughed, sputtered, and cursed, and then Hiei jerked me by the shoulders to face him.

"Wash," he demanded, and he grabbed my wrist and started scrubbing at my skin with his fingers. Calluses chafed my flesh; dried flakes of the Salamander's clear blood fell into the water, turned white, and skimmed along the surface toward the drain.

"I need, I need a sponge," I said, gasping, and Hiei stripped off his shirt, wadded it into a ball, and started scrubbing with that. He passed the cloth roughly over one arm and then the other, then spun me away and yanked my shirt over my head and off. He pressed it into my hands before using his own shirt on my back, carving harsh, painful circles into the skin so nothing but a new, pink layer could shine through the gunk.

My frenzy returned. I dipped my shirt into the water and dragged it over my chest, scraping and scrubbing and sliding and scouring each drop of Salamander goo until I burned raw from washing so hard, and then I started on my face, pushing the cloth into my cheeks like—

Hiei, from behind me, grabbed my wrists.

"You're wounded," he said softly. "Let me."

I turned. He didn't meet my eyes as he lifted a shirt, his or mine I couldn't tell, to my face and carefully, gently, and deftly worked around the cuts Karla had tended.

I wanted him to rub the cloth in until I bled, but he did not.

"Done," he said at last, and I turned away and sank into the water, hair floating around my wide-open eyes in a blonde cloud. When I surface I attacked my hair with my fingers, scrubbing at it with nothing but water, trying so hard to get slime I didn't know was there out and away from my scalp, and—

Hiei caught my wrists, forcing a bottle of something into my hands. It was shampoo, I realized, but I didn't thank him as I squirted it into my palms and lathered, lathered, lathered until the suds fell thick around me and rolled into my eyes, stinging. It was only a hot hand in the small of my back that made me walk over to the waterfall and duck under it, another hand that forced my chin up and made me face the fall dead on, and then the hands twined into my hair and tugged at it, rough and gentle at the same time as they coaxed out the shampoo and cleaned more than slime from my roots.

I don't know when I started humming, but at some point I opened my mouth because humming just wasn't enough, and I started to sing. Water from the falls rushed down my throat, making me choke, but Hiei slapped my back once and I was fine.

I was fine.

The English lyrics came out in a rush. "I cannot guess what we'll discover, when we turn the dirt with our palms cupped like shovels..." I sang in a small, trembling voice. "But I know our filthy hands can wash one another's, and… and…"

Hiei cupped my face in his hands as I trailed off, breathing a deep, shuddering sigh when he slowly guided me out from under the falls.

"You're clean," he said.

I opened my eyes. He didn't flinch away when I slowly put my hand against his face, thumb brushing the crest of his cheekbone for a moment. Bright red eyes drifted halfway closed.

"Thank you," I said.

Hiei almost—almost—smiled.

His scowl was warm, at any rate.

* * *

When it was done and I found myself sitting on the lip of the stone pool, feet in the water with hair clinging to my neck and naked chest, I realized I wasn't wearing a shirt. I crossed my arms over myself, feeling tendrils of real embarrassment redden my cheeks, but before I could ask for it a towel fell around my shoulders in a warm wave. Looking up made me see Hiei, standing there with water dripping from his nose and hair onto my face.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, "about your shoes."

He didn't say anything, assessing me with eyes that missed nothing. Then: "They'll dry."

I swallowed, tearing my eyes from him to look at the pool. The waterfall looked like liquid platinum, silvery and gold at once when it hit the pewter pool in a shower of ripples and whorls.

"I…" I trailed off. "I don't think I could have handled that on my own."

Hiei grunted, sat down on the rocks, and took off his boots. The legs of his pants were crumpled from where they had been tucked in, but when he sat beside me and levered his feet into the pool, the legs billowed into their natural shape.

We sat in silence broken only by the waterfall for a long while. The water was warm, I noticed for the first time, but Hiei seemed to be steaming all on his own. His hair already looked dry, though not as spiky as normal. The water probably had something to do with it.

"I was worried," he said suddenly, and he did not turn his head my way. Our gazes met out of the corners of our eyes, though.

"What about?" I asked.

He looked at the pool, leaned forward, and placed his elbows on his thighs so his hands could dangle between his knees. Muscles in his shoulders bulged.

"Not about the Hunt," he said, still looking at the water. "But afterward. I was worried about _afterward_, before the Hunt began."

I said: "The drug?"

Hiei snorted. "I didn't know about that. Neither did you."

I still stared at him. He was scowling, but not in his I-hate-this way. Hiei had many different scowls; this one was more along the lines of his I'm-admitting-something-personal scowl. He had worn it the day before, on the beach, so I knew what it looked like.

That scowl lingered fresh in my memory, as it were.

"You're not a killer," he finally said, and the words were honest. "You're just _not_. And I accept that." Eyes flicked my way and retreated. "But you _are_ innocent, and innocence is easily corrupted."

I opened my mouth to protest—I wasn't _that_ innocent, was I?, and I couldn't be corrupted _too_ easily, I didn't think—but he shot me a look that said he was not done.

"I was… afraid," (he said the word like it could cut him) "that you might enjoy the… thrill. The adrenaline." A pause. "You've led a sheltered life. Such an experience could become… addictive, if your innocence didn't shatter."

He looked me dead on, then. Cherry-red had never looked so guarded.

"I don't think it did, if your remorse was proof enough," he said. "And… I'm glad for that."

My mouth opened in surprise. "I…"

"There's enough killer in me for the both of us," he said, voice turning rough again as he looked away.

I didn't know how to respond to that, so I floundered. But then Hiei looked back at me, saw my mouth working, and asked: "What?"

My eyes dropped hastily, down to the pool and the water and the light reflecting on it. Daylight was turning quickly into darkness—how long had we been out there?

"I've never seen your feet before," I blurted, still staring into the pool.

He glanced at me, expressionless. "Is that the drugs talking?" he asked.

"No," I said. I looked back at our feet. "It's just me."

A thought struck, then, and even though I was more in control of myself, the words still tumbled free.

"Like this," I murmured, "with the water rippling over our feet, I can't tell that mine are… different."

When I turned my face his way, I saw that he had frozen, eyes tilted down toward his feet and mine.

"They're both distorted, like this," I said. "Like this, it doesn't even matter."

* * *

_NOTES:_

_I am so sorry for the general lack of replied to reviews/PMs! Please know that I'll get back to you soon! I'm just busy as HELL right now; URGH!_

_So the ending scene WAS NOT planned by any stretch of the imagination. Dani keeps running away from me. I can't tell if I like it or if it sucks._

_Song credits: Title by My chemical Romance, lyric excerpt from "Soul Meets Body" by Death Cab For Cutie. I've used the song in this story once already and I think it came full circle. Weird. Not planned at all._

_Anyway. I wanted to show Dani freaking out because I feel like she'd be out of character if I didn't. Only, it went on longer than I expected. _

_The next chapter is TOTAL AND COMPLETE PLOT. No extraneous detail whatsoever. Just plot. This had some plot and some random stuff. Sorry I couldn't work more plot in. =/_

_Well, I have news on my Nana. She's going to be staying at my house for the next few weeks as she goes on many, many doctor visits, so if I seem rushed or distracted it's because I'm entertaining the wonderful lady. Also, she's feeling good and says 'hello!' I showed her your well-wishes and her spirits were LIFTED afterward. ^^_

_I LOVE YOU PEOPLE. Seriously. You put up with me. Not many people do that. Colbub, Mihakuu, dude where's my spirit gun, SillyGoddessDisco, darkravensnight, Koryu Elric, nutshell87, Foxgirl Ray, itsallaboutbob, Kai-Chan94, hieisdarkdragonchick, overfreshh, destinyswindow,Kaiya's Watergarden, Zetsubel, American Senpai, BiGayStraightWhoCares, Wings of Silver Rain, chocolateluvr13, SupremeBaka, MusicFiend666, Dreamehz, j.d.y., Angel of Randomosity, LadyoftheGags, Otaku Wench, shishifearme, etowa-ru, AkaMizu-chan, REclun, Akatsu Fate Chan, Kajihenge Yoko, Masuyo Shun, Yusuke, Katt Jeane, TallyYoungBlood, Snowgirl7589, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, AlyssHeart71, Miyakomono, OhhTaylor Jade, rain chant, DevilAngelWolf27, Fangirl _(to respond to the anonymous review: Europe still exists! I imagine things like Christianity are now minority religions, but still around. Hiei, however, I think understood Dani's meaning via context clues. He's a smart cookie.),_ CrescentVenus, DaAmazingMeepers, 0nfateswings, ShadowFireFox13, Naitza-Kururugi, Dyani91, and yumchaitea!_

Fangirl: Could you please give me an email or another way to contact you? I can't start a conversation with you like this, and I'd really like to. You seem to be demanding answers but you give me no convenient means to give them. I'm willing to talk to you if you'd only give me the chance!

Anyway! Remember that this entire thing is written in a language the characters aren't speaking; sometimes, liberties are made when Dani translates from Japanese to English. They're probably saying an equivalent of the word "god" in their original Japanese, but I think seeing Japanese words interspersed amid an English text would be even more "disillusioning" (to use your word) than seeing the word "Christ" crop up on occasion.

I'm glad you brought these issues up!


	49. Chapter 49: Who's That Chick?

Future Talk

Chapter 49:

"Who's That Chick?"

* * *

Hiei turned his back so I could change clothes, and once I combed my hair Hiei rewrapped my foot. Then he helped me up the stairs, through the bathroom, and into the main room without a word.

It wasn't like there was much to say, after all.

The others looked up when Hiei and I entered, but they do anything other than stare warily in my direction until after I told them: "I'm sorry about earlier. I'm better now. Still jumpy, but… better." A raw smile. "Thanks. For taking care of me, I mean." I looked at Hiei out of the corner of my eye, trying not to think about the warm arm wrapped around my waist. "I know I'm a troublemaker."

Kuwabara hopped to his feet without preamble; I flinched at the sudden movement, but he was only bringing me my cane with a relieved smile. Hiei stopped supporting me so I could stand with the object's help.

"You had us worried, there," Kuwabara joked. "But you look a lot calmer now that you got all that gunk washed off." He seemed eager and hesitant at once. "Hungry?"

I wasn't, but the look on his face didn't make me want to disappoint him. "Yeah," I said, and Kuwabara beamed.

"Good!" he said. "Yusuke volunteered to do it!"

This shocked me, of course, but Yusuke merely passed a derisive snort and said: "But only because Kurama thinks soup'd be better on your stomach than solid food, and I'm a ramen chef."

"It's true," the redhead admitted. "I did suggest it. Were my assumptions right?"

Yusuke, suddenly, lost a measure of his cockiness. "We can make just about anything if you think me cooking sounds like a shitty idea," he said, trying to sound casual even though he fidgeted on his cushion. "Your call and stuff."

Kuwabara shot him a somewhat pleased look. Hiei moved away from my side and sat down, reclining on the cushions with closed eyes.

"He's right," Kuwabara said, grinning. "It's whatever you want tonight, Dani."

Looking at the four of them—at Yusuke's unsure face, Kurama's pleasantly assessing expression, Kuwabara's grin, and Hiei's reassuring calm—I felt the roughness of the moment pass away.

They cared.

About _me_.

I did not reply for a moment, soaking up that realization. The lot of them radiated care and comfort despite my inconsistencies, and that aura of friendship, concern, and peace felt like a cool balm against—

"Dani?" Kuwabara asked, coming a step closer. His face had pinched itself into an alarmed mask. "Are you OK?"

I wiped away the rogue tear streaking down my cheek, and smiled.

"I'm fine," I told him. I looked at each of them in turn. "I'm just… happy, I guess."

And oddly enough, I was telling them the truth.

* * *

They came for us at dusk, just like Krishna said they would, and they took us into the city on the squirrels' backs. I didn't really know where we were going, so I was just as unknowing as the guys when the Sisters walked down the city's main street, past the meeting square, and out the other side down a new, paved road. This carried on for a time before we reached the island's opposite shore, and soon enough we found ourselves standing before a gate. I had no idea what it guarded, at first, since there didn't seem to be anything but rushing water behind it.

Before this gets away from me, I feel I should mention something. I say that the structure was a 'gate,' but it's really more of a carved stone archway with a huge boulder pushed in front of it. The gate itself had been engraved with images of Salamanders and Sisters in battle up the two pillars on its either side, though the upper arch's relief depicted something far stranger. Ovals on small pedestals showed slim-limbed, naked women in their centers, women who seemed more delicate than the muscled Sisters who flung spears and swords with glee. Hair fell in absurdly long waves from the oval-peoples' heads down past their feet, where it spilled out of their confining ovals in whorls that formed the arch's border. All of their eyes were closed, and all of them stood with feet together and hands at their sides, open palms facing forward in a benevolent, welcoming sort of way.

Deep in my gut, I figured I was catching sight of the elusive Bright Ones at last.

When we approached, two Sisters—Sisters far bigger than I had ever seen before, who were dressed in simple grey tunics that blended in with the stone—appeared out of the arch's shadows. They said nothing, only nodded when Krishna told them to move the boulder aside, and then the muscles in their bare legs and arms rippled and the stone was rolled away.

A long path stretched before us. I could not see the end of it. Boulders lined it and obscured all but the slim river of sky directly above our heads, and we walked down this path for a long time. The road grew progressively narrower and narrower—the Riders could only walk single-file, though a few jumped atop the boulders themselves to make their own path. Soon I heard the sound of waves lapping on the boulders' other side, and when I asked Krishna about it she said: "This road connects the city to another island nearby. It's the only thing connecting the two, and we built it before the waterline for secrecy's sake. The boulders keep the water off the path." She chuckled. "There are two whirlpools just outside, to keep swimmers at bay."

I thought about it, then asked: "So the two islands are like the top and bottom chambers of an hourglass, and this road is the narrow opening in the middle?"

"Seen from above, yes. Though this road is much longer than the narrow part of an hourglass." She craned her head, staring forward, then directed her next words to one of the Riders on the boulders above. "How much farther?"

"I can see it already," the Rider said, smiling, and after a few short minutes we exited the narrow, walled road.

Standing before us, in sharp contrast to the stone city we had left behind, was the edge of a forest. The trees were so big that I doubted even the largest of the Sisters could have wrapped her arms around the trunk and touched fingers on the other side, and silvery-green leaves as large as my torso created a dense carpet underfoot. Krishna guided us into the trees without hesitation, plucking a leaf or two off the trees so she could tuck them into her tunic. I looked back to try and see the island's shore. It too, however, had been ringed with large boulders.

"This is a sacred place," Krishna said when she saw me looking. "We build walls to keep others out."

"I see." A pause. "Are we on time for this… gathering?"

"Warriors arrive early," Krishna said. "Riders, guardians, and those who slew the Salamanders alike." She said nothing for a moment. Then: "The men who helped, too. They will not be allowed in the inner sanctum of the Bright Ones, but the outer hall is open to them during the honoring ceremony."

The boys were walking far behind the other Riders, so I couldn't see them. "And will they be allowed to watch the ceremony?"

"Yes," Krishna said. The forest closed in around us, silent but for the sound of leaves in the wind. "They can also watch the telling of our origins, since if glorifies the Lady. Even men should know of her."

"Of course," I said.

The trees loomed high. Some of the Riders jumped from branch to branch, and they made surprisingly little sound. More than once I flinched when a Rider plummeted to the ground a few feet away, her controlled dive sending my over-amped adrenaline to spiking helplessly. Krishna shushed me each time, telling me not to be afraid even though the forest was growing so dark with night's coming, and just as I felt my senses begin to jump out of control with out-of-context fear, light blossomed through the trees ahead.

A clearing surfaced a minute or so later, and in its center stood the strangest building I had ever seen.

Not to say it was the most impressive or the most beautiful building I had ever seen, mind you. Really, the only things that made it seem out of the ordinary were its size (imagine something bigger-than-a-shopping-mall in scope) and the fact that it was in the middle of a gigantic _forest_. It was rectangular in shape (we had approached it on one of the short sides) and it was made of pale grey concrete—

Wait, _concrete_?

I looked past my consternation to take in other facts: it had no windows, no decorations, and no flourishes of architecture or design, so the behemoth looked like a skulking, fashionless monster whose prime had long since past. The front of it stood many stories high, of course, but it had seen much wear and tear during its life and the back wall had, apparently, collapsed. Or was it that the building's foundation and rear wall had merely sunk into the ground? I couldn't be sure, but the fact remained that the structure appeared to delve into the earth at a gentle incline, and in places I noticed that the concrete had crumbled away to reveal a wire frame made of steel cables as thick around as my thigh, or maybe even thicker. Some of the wires had broken and been forced outward, angrily spearing the air like tendrils of metallic hate, and in places with even more wear and tear I could make out something shining behind the wire, a layer of something dark grey and luminous that looked like, like…

Well, it looked like nothing _I_ had ever seen before, that's for sure.

A huge pair of double doors—three times as tall as a Sister, but still tiny in comparison to the rest of the building—lay before us, and before them stood ten Sisters in full armor and weaponry. A bonfire that stank of incense shot no smoke into the sky; only warmth and light emanated from it, for whatever reason. The guards watched us approach with suspicious eyes, and when we got close enough for them to see our faces they finally relaxed enough to collectively grab the massive metal rings on the doors' fronts and drag them slowly open.

Inside, all I could see was black.

Despite my misgivings, we walked right into it.

The doors boomed shut at our backs.

Have you ever been in the pitch dark? Not the dark of under-the-covers or locked-in-a-closet, I mean—those types of dark can be marred by the light under the crack in the door or the streetlamp glowing through your curtain. Pitch dark, the dark at the bottom of the ocean or the dark found deep below the earth, feels like it's alive. It breathes and whispers down your neck, crowding in close in a suffocating wave that makes you feel like you'll never see light again, and everything you hear and feel is multiplied by a hundred fold, though rather than be a reassuring reminder that there is something _besides_ the dark around you, every press of skin on skin and every drip of water can make you jump, startled, or can feel like something alien and sinister even when it's as mundane as a tank top pressing into your back.

"The darkness is necessary," Krishna whispered when I dug my fingers into her arm, looking for something solid to cling to. "Soon, we will be back in the light."

I think I whimpered; I was too busy grabbing Krishna and squeezing my eyes shut, hoping to replace the awful dark with a dark of my own making, to be sure.

"Calm down, little one," she told me, massive hand stroking my hair. "You will be fine."

I was far too distracted to count the number of twists and turns we took before Krishna at last told me to open my eyes. "There is light ahead," she murmured, and when I peered into the blackness I could see that some of it had been bleached to dark grey. A few steps more and the glow ahead of us began to beat back the dark outright; we rounded a corner, and my heart leapt into my throat at the sight of a dozen fires arranged in a large circle, in the center of which burned another, even bigger fire. We were in a room nearly as big as the city's square, with a ceiling so high I could not make it out even with the fires for illumination. The room had four walls made of solid concrete; we had come in from the south wall, which only had one small gap to allow people inside. The others appeared to allow no means of passage, making the room a dead end.

Krishna led us in, past the outer circle and toward the one in the middle, signaling for the others to wait at the circle's edge, and as she did a deep, melodious voice called: "Hail, Sisters."

Krishna called a greeting back: "Hail, Grand Mother," she said, and out of the dark came the object of her salutation. The fire cast her wrinkles into even deeper relief than usual, and after Krishna helped me down onto the ground she came over to say: "Elaina. Have you recovered?"

I nodded slowly. "The potion you put on my forehead—"

"Karla told me," she said. "I apologize for that oversight."

"It's fine," I said, smiling. "I know it will help me get through tonight."

Her brow knit as her mouth shut tight. "You are prepared for the pain, then," she said, but it was not a question.

"I think so," came my reply, and my pulse lurched a little faster. The warm soup in my stomach threatened to come up when I thought about what was to come, so I quickly changed the subject. "Where can I take my men during the ceremony?"

The Grand Mother, without hesitation, pointed out at the edge of the circle of fires. "Inside the ring is sacred ground, and they are not allowed. But over there, in the shadows, is a small cave. They may observe from there."

I nodded, looking in the direction of her hand. "May I give them a light to see by?" I asked.

Thankfully, she nodded. "Go tend them, if you will, but meet me back here soon. The others will be arriving." She turned to Krishna. "And see to you and your squadron's mounts, Sister. You know the way."

Krishna bowed. "I do," she said, and she swept herself up into the saddle before calling for the others.

I bowed to the Grand Mother before walking off, over toward the boys who had been left alone by the edge of the circle. Yusuke made to walk toward me when I got closer, but I called: "Stay out, please!"

"This place is giving me the willies," Kuwabara muttered when I also made it outside the ring. I could see none of their faces behind the masks, and though this bothered me a little—why did they all have to look like Seishou?—I tried not to pay attention.

"I can give you a light over this way," I told them, and we set off toward the other side of the circle with them dogging my heels. It took a while since we had to walk around the circle's edge, but eventually I was able to make out a darker patch in the already dark room and step inside. A small space had been hollowed out of the wall, with smooth floor that gently curved into walls and a high ceiling, like some sort of organic stone egg.

I walked to the far back of the egg, where wall sloped down to make the floor. Kneeling, I let theta beat back the darkness all around, and with a sigh I imagined the firesong I had used to summon warmth back on the cliff by Genkai's temple. That had been quite a night: Lauren's memories had cleared the way to a new power, struggling on my own had finally amounted to something, Hiei had been there to do his strange version of cheering-me-on… he told me more about himself than ever…

… he offered to protect me, and he'd followed through on it, too…

"That feels like it was forever ago," I murmured when I opened my eyes to find a fire blazing away. It lit up the dark egg completely, leaving nothing to the imagination when I turned back toward the waiting boys. I shoved my hands into my sweat-shirt's front pocket, cane hooked over my elbow as I bit nervously at my bottom lip.

"So there might be something I haven't told you about tonight," I said at last, and Hiei yanked off his mask. Eyes blazed like blood in my direction, but he said nothing and I offered no apology in return.

"What, do you want us to act surprised?" Yusuke said, grinning as he took off his mask, too.

"I'd be more surprised if you _didn't_ leave something out," Kuwabara said, but his chipper tone didn't suggest an insult.

I sighed. "Sorry. This doesn't affect you guys at all, not the way the Hunt did, it's just…" I tried to look sheepish; it was easy. "Well, I wanted to be honest with you for once."

"It's a gesture we appreciate," Kurama said soothingly. Green eyes held hidden calculation. "Still, I can't help but wonder why you brought it up."

I couldn't help but look at Hiei, who took the look as an invitation to step closer.

"Good question," he said so softly I doubt the others heard, and I turned back toward the fire to avoid looking at him.

"It's nothing you should worry about," I said. "It sounds worse than it really is, and I don't want there to be any confusion. That's all."

"Confusion?" Kuwabara repeated, obviously… well, confused.

"Yeah." I took a deep breath. "I just wanted to warn you that if there's any… uh, _screaming_, I'm actually OK." I turned, smiling at their stunned, or alarmed, or just plain freaked out faces. "Don't come running, is all I wanted to say."

Predictably, Hiei had something to say about that. "Screaming?" he hissed, stepping close so he could look straight at me without more than a few inches of air as separation. "What do you mean, _screaming_? What are you going to do that will make you want to _scream_?"

I shrank back. "Nothing that will result in lasting damage to my person," I said defensively. "Just some, um, cosmetic changes."

"Such as?" Kurama asked, stepping forward. He put a hand on Hiei's shoulder and shook his head at the fire demon, but Hiei merely bared his teeth and shook him off.

I fidgeted. "There might be, um, burning, and then tattooing, involved," I managed to bite out, and just as Hiei's eyes widened and his curved eyeteeth glinted porcelain in the firelight, Yusuke said: "Guys. Company."

"Quite," said Ryu, and then he stepped inside.

I probably would have stared at him had seeing Hiei's memories not prepared me for his arrival. Ryu's cheeks had thinned out, become a little hollow around the edges in a way that made him appear much more intimidating, and his gooseberry eyes glittered more intently than I'd ever seen. He looked leaner, tougher, and a touch more masculine than he had when I'd seen him last… at the hotel, I realized.

It struck me, in that moment, that though Ryu professed to be in love with me, I had spent only a few hours in his company, tops.

"Gentlemen," he said, nodding at Yusuke, then Kuwabara, then Kurama, and then at Hiei. His eyes fastened on me last, and he smiled with a full show of his teeth. "Ah. Dani."

"Ryu," I returned.

He waited for me to say more, and when I didn't his smile faded. "Oh, would you prefer 'Elaina'?" he asked.

"Whatever," I snapped.

He looked thoughtful. "I'll call you Dani, then, when we're… alone." He shot the boys a conspiratorial look before turning back to me, and his good nature faded into sorrow. "I should be angry at _you_, you know," he said, "for betraying me the way you did. Yet it's _you_ giving me that look tonight. Why is that?"

I inclined my head, not deigning to change the heat of my glare, but I didn't say anything.

"Ah, yes. As prideful as ever, I see." He chuckled low in his throat, then took two steps inside the egg, long legs carrying him past Yusuke, Kuwabara, and Kurama in a single pair of strides. Hiei moved to block his way before the psychic could come any closer, back mere inches away from my chest as he put his body directly in front of mine.

"I'd like to speak to her, if you don't mind," Ryu said, staring down at Hiei with pursed lips.

"And if I _do_ mind?" Hiei snarled. I could feel his body heat rising; was he summoning power to attack?

But Ryu only shrugged despite the very physical warning. "I can talk from here."

"Not if I rip out your throat, first," Hiei said, but before I knew what I was doing I shot out my hands and grabbed his wrists from behind. He froze at the touch, head whipping back so he could look at me out of one crimson eye. Rage bubbled there, along with something else that reminded me very much of an animal protecting its territory. The feminist in me wasn't too keen on that one, but I pushed those feelings away for just a moment.

"Hiei," I said, fingers tightening. I knew he only let me touch him because he wanted me to, that he could break free in less than a second and that I had no real power here, but I was grateful he let me pretend just the same. "Hiei, _don't_."

"But—" he started to say, and I gripped him harder and he stopped.

"He isn't worth it," I said, not looking at Ryu once. When Hiei's expression didn't change, I said, with more urgency: "He isn't worth _you_."

We stared at one another for a moment, wills battling in silence, and then his eyes fell closed.

"You're lucky," he said to Ryu, "that I let myself listen to her sometimes."

I let him go slowly, and he did not stop me when I walked around him, past the others, and out into the dark.

Behind me, Ryu called: "You look lovely this evening, Dani. Have fun."

* * *

"Sisters," the Grand Mother called an hour or so later, when the others had finished migrating inside and filled the circle of fires to its brim. Their low, buzzing voices fell into a pronounced hush when the Grand Mother bade myself and the other Salamander-slayers to rise. "We have gathered here, on the eve of the Hunt, to usher the souls of the departed creatures into the afterlife, and to bring praise to the Bright Lady."

To my surprise, no one cheered and the Grand Mother's face was grim.

"We will now mark each of these Sisters," she gestured at us, "with the heart's blood of the fiery Sister she slew today, so that the creature who provides so much for us may be remembered by she who took her, and by those who see the ritual tonight." She turned to us. "May the first step forward."

Orimand was the first. I had been concerned when she was first brought into the room on a strength borne by three of her kin, but despite the bandages bound tight around her legs and hips she looked alert enough. Those same kin were the ones to carry her forward on her stretcher, and though the action obviously pained her she managed to sit up, dip her head, and gesture at her bare chest.

"I want to be marked here," she ground out, hand lying flat across the flat plane below her collar bone. Her other hand clutched a bowl—ruby red, clear, and the same material as the bowl from the blessing ceremony that morning.

I knew, now, that it was a Salamander's bone that had made that bowl, because I had been given one as well before the ritual began.

From her sleeves, the Grand Mother drew a silver blade and a mortar-shaped length of Salamander bone about as long as my forearm. As Orimand lay back against her stretcher, face pale and fists clenched, the Grand Mother knelt, took the bowl from her, and said: "Sister Orimand the Brave, we honor you this night." Her smile was as kind as an ancient oak tree, and just as removed. "Bear this pain bravely, as you did the Salamander."

I had a clear view of what happened next. I saw every detail of the Grand Mother dipping the bone mortar into the bowl, swirling it around three times, and applying the smoking rod to Orimand's flesh. Skin crackled and peeled with a shower of steam, dark blood rushing to spill across Orimand's breasts and throat in a sticky wave. Orimand herself clenched her teeth and cried out, once, before snapping her mouth shut and staring at the ceiling as if she could attack it with her vision alone, and she made no other move or sound as the Grand Mother traced a very specific pattern across her flesh. It looked like a capital 'S' turned on its side with a circle in the center, and then the Grand Mother drew a small symbol on each end of the 's'. I couldn't tell what the symbols were until the Grand Mother drew a cloth from her sleeve and pressed it into the glistening burn, and when she removed the cloth it appeared that the wound had cauterized itself already. The symbols, I realized, were small representations of war hammers—the weapon Orimand had used to slay the Salamander, I remembered.

Orimand, on the ground, breathed a sigh of relief when the symbol was finished.

But the Grand Mother was far from done. She set the bowl and mortar aside before taking up the blade –the scalpel, I knew then—and pressing it harshly into the burn. Orimand's eyes flew open, a scream spewing from between her tight teeth before she muffled it with a moan. The flesh smoked around the blade before re-cauterizing itself, and before the eyes of us all the Grand Mother began to carve shapes, swirls, and symbols into the burned flesh. This was an art, I realized, because as I watched I could see that she was adding depth and shading and dimensions to the image on Orimand's skin, making the hammers look heavy and sharp and the 's' look as sinuous as the Salamander's dead coils. It was beautiful even if it was as macabre as anything I had ever seen, and when it was finally through she pressed the cloth into it, held it there, and bellowed: "It is finished! Bring out Brave Orimand's memento!"

The crowd's murmuring picked up again when some of the Sisters from the council I had sat before so long ago pressed through them, carrying above their heads a long box made of stone. They set it before the Grand Mother with a flourish before retreating, and then the Grand Mother lifted the box's lid and holding up exactly what Orimand would want: a war hammer made of jewel-bright red bone, one that looked as light as air but as dense and hard as ruby or fire itself.

"She died for you, and so you will live for her!" said the Grand Mother. "Wield her soul well, Orimand the Brave, and may the Salamander's power follow you all your days!"

She passed the hammer down to Orimand. When the prone Sister's finger wrapped around the handle, her expression went from pained to awed. Tears welled in her black eyes, and with a small cry she clutched the weapon to her breast.

That's when the cheering erupted throughout the hall, and an exhausted Orimand lifted the war hammer high above her head as she lay back against her pallet, newfound strength shining in her wet eyes. When the cheers at last died, another Sister was ushered forward.

We went through Herina (the curves of her 's' had been turned to bows, with an arrow crossing through the circle in the design's center) and Nik (whose 's' looked like shields and whose central circle had a broadsword bisecting it) with much the same rigmarole, only Herina's tattoo was on her thigh and Nik's was on her bicep. They each received weapons, as well, and they were (predictably) a bow with a quiver of arrows and a sword and shield. Nik became "Nik the Strong," and Herina became "Herina the Sure."

Then it was Hogosha's turn.

She was much like the others: the branded symbol, the carved details, only the Grand Mother did not embellish the etching with a weapon and when it came time to gift her with a title and an object made of bone, the Grand Mother merely bade Hogosha to rise, wounds still dripping on her shoulder, and she said: "Sister Hogosha did not prove herself as we would have hoped this day. She accepted aid from a man to slay her Sister, the Salamander. It was my decision to postpone her naming until she proves herself worthy of her bounty." She turned to Hogosha, whose pale blue face had turned deep, royal blue with rage. "Sister Hogosha, your Sisters love with and wish you the best in this task. May your turn come swift and true."

Rather than reply, Hogosha turned and walked off into the darkness, white braid swinging. She wore the only speck of white in the entire room, and watching her go reminded me that everyone else wore black.

Not for the first time, I wondered why.

"Sister Elaina," the Grand Mother said, "step forward."

My heart jumped into my mouth, but I did as she asked. She took the bowl from me, waiting for me to tell her where I wanted my tattoo, and I swallowed once before saying: "I am smaller than all of you, and there is only one place where a tattoo of this size can fit." I turned my back on the Grand Mother, stripped off my sweatshirt, and pushed the straps of my tank top down. "Across my back, below my neck but above my shoulder blades. Will this do?"

A cool finger traced my bare skin, making me jump. "A fitting place for your wings," the old woman mused, and before I could reply she placed the rod against my flesh.

Krishna had told me, back when I'd asked her about the Hunt, that the Grand Mother would use the heart's blood of the Salamander I'd slain to burn the marks into me. _The blood will burn forever,_ was what Krishna had said, _just as the Salamander's soul will in your skin. It will hurt more than anything you have ever felt, but you will never be cold again afterward. _She had shown me her own tattoo, emblazoned vertically on her right forearm, afterward._ Riders have all slain a Salamander and been blessed with its blood. It's how we take the cold when we're not on the island._

_Is it worth the pain?_ I had asked her, tracing the design with a finger.

She said:_ It feels like you will never be alone again, because the soul of the beast is always with you, keeping you safe. The Salamander's soul lives in its heart-blood, after all._

_But is it worth the pain? _I persisted

_Yes. _

_But you will want to die, during._

And I did want to die.

I really did.

I was kneeling, hands flat on the concrete ground, before I knew it, and the Grand Mother bore down onto me without an ounce of misplaced pity. It felt like my entire world centered on my upper back. The adrenaline buzz the weird potion had given me when the pain first picked up was nowhere near enough to guard me against the burning. Liquid fire glided across my skin, roughly rupturing it with static bursts of harshness that put the gliding sensation to deep, visceral shame. I felt like my bones would stab through my skin if I was subjected to much more, and every swipe of the mortar was a new spear of agony on my already hazy mind. I felt her trace the curves of the 's' with stunning clarity, and then she passed the mortar in a circle and began to paint it in with lazy, long strokes. Each one made the world tip over on itself and spin, and then she touched the curves of the 's' with short, small strokes until I thought she was _trying_ to kill me with her persistence, her ability to find new places to burn, _surely she isn't trying to make this harder than it already is_ I thought as my breath tore out of my mouth and shrieked into the dark. My eyes locked on the fire before me, and it looked cold in comparison to the fire in my skin, but maybe it wasn't quite as hot as Hiei's eyes, but that thought meant little in the wake of such _agony_—

And then the pain stopped.

My throat felt raw; I'm sure I had been screaming, but I can't remember for the pain. My back stung like a thousand bees had filled it full of needles that rubbed together when I moved or breathed or thought, but still, the feeling of _not_ being burned by the Salamander blood was ambrosial enough—

And then she started with the knife.

I couldn't help but scream, then, and tears burst out of my eyes with an audible 'pop'. My fingers dragged into the concrete, nails peeling back as the skin around my mouth and jaw stretched, pulled totally taut as I opened my mouth wide, so wide, and bellowed out how I felt as the Grand Mother attacked me with everything she had, pouring new waves of heat and pain into my skin. I'm sure I cursed, I might have pleaded for her to stop, but she didn't listen to me and kept going until my cries quieted not because I wanted them to, but because I had no more energy with which to protest.

What felt like hours later, she stopped.

"Sister Elaina, the Compassionate," she said, voice full of sorrow as she pushed the cloth into my skin. I flinched, but said nothing. "Bring out her memento."

I didn't watch them bring out my prize because I was trying so hard to breathe, to not faint in front of all these people, and to simply not throw up from the force of the pain. Large, gnarled hands gripped me and pulled me to my feet, setting my tattoo back on fire from the movement, but then a long, warm _something_ was in my fingers and against my cheek, and I felt _safe_.

The sheer incongruousness of this made me open my eyes.

I saw a walking stick. It was about as tall as I was, with a sphere the size of a softball on one end and a small cube on the other. The length of it was as thick around as my arm, though it tapered a bit thinner in the middle so I could wrap my hand around it, and it felt so _right_ in my hand that it was hard to imagine never having held it before.

"It suits you," I heard the Grand Mother say, and somehow, despite the pain—or maybe it was _to_ spite the pain—I smiled.

I didn't think about looking at my new tattoo until much later.

* * *

They applied a cooling salve to all of our wounds when we were done, and then the Grand Mother took center stage once more.

"Why," she said, "do you honor the Salamanders above other creatures?"

Instantly, the atmosphere in the room changed. Earlier it had felt like solemn celebration; like people gathered to lift up, glorify, and look on with satisfaction.

Then, however, the atmosphere felt thick with longing so palpable I could almost touch it.

"It is not because they are female," she said slowly, voice soft and immovable at once. "It is not because they provide warmth to our land from deep under the ground. It is not, even, because their bodies can cure, provide fire without smoke, and purify our food before we eat it." A long pause, one in which the Grand Mother looked at the Sisters with solemn eyes. "No, Sisters. Though those things are what make them wonderful, they are not what make them holy."

Silence. Expectant, booming silence.

"And why do we Hunt, dear Sisters?" she asked. "Why do we pay the Bright Ones tribute and homage? Why do we guard them for the time in which they wake?"

"These things are inseparably intertwined."

"Long ago," the Grand Mother began, "it was a time of war, just as it is now. Then, however, our ancestors had no island to keep them isolated and safe from the realms of men." Her eyes hardened. "We were raped, slaughtered, and abused, so our ancient Mothers set out on a journey to find a new home, one free from tyranny and men."

"At that time, our leader was a powerful woman named Hinotama. During a short time of peace, she found our ancestors a place to briefly stay, but it did not have the resources of a proper settlement and she knew we needed a real home. She set off on her own, hoping to find a place uninhabited by men."

Her tone dropped to a whisper when she said: "She was not successful."

Someone let out a brief cry, one of sorrow and regret, but the Grand Mother held up a hand to silence them.

"Faith, Sisters. Many days into Hinotama's journey, she climbed to the top of a mountain and saw, to her curiosity and wonder, a rain of fire descend upon the earth many, many leagues away. It took many days of travel to reach the place where the fire fell, and the way was blocked by water she could only pass after befriending one of the mounts from the forest across the water. But befriend them she did, making herself the first Rider of our number, and when she at last saw the place of fire's fall she beheld a strange sight: It was as if an entire country had fallen from the sky, burying a portion of this world beneath roaring waters and the skeletons of a dead civilization."

Sitting on the ground between two huge Sisters, I went very, very still.

_Was this… America? _

_Surely it had to be!_

The Grand Mother continued: "Many buildings—buildings far larger than any she had ever seen—lay scattered over the earth. A bright white light emanated from one such building, one larger than all the others that was partially buried beneath the earth."

The Grand Mother raised her arms, indicating the space around us.

"We stand in that place now, Sisters," she said, "just as Hinotama did thousands of years ago."

A cry went up, one of suppressed joy and rapture. The Grand Mother let this one run its course before she went on with her story.

"The light was so bright" she said, "that Hinotama had to shield her eyes with a leaf so she was not struck blind. But this light was so bright that she could see straight through the leaf to the world beyond, and when the light finally began to fade she entered the dwelling through two broken metal doors." Black eyes glittered with pride. "We have since repaired those doors, as you saw when you passed through them."

Triumphant cheering made the room ring with voices. I mentally told them to shut up, grinding my cheek against my new staff in agitation, but it still seemed to take them forever to die down.

"Inside," the Grand Mother went on at long last, "was a maze; Hinotama cut off tails of her own hair so she could find her way out again. When she reached the heart of this place, she beheld a sight unlike any other."

Her voice dropped to a tender whisper, one that made me feel like sighing, too, and one that made some nearby Sisters start to weep.

"She saw many chrysalises of brilliant light," said the Grand Mother softly. "In each lay a woman, sleeping peacefully amid her halo of light."

I barely had time to process this—_women in butterfly chrysalises? What the heck were those doing there?—_before she pressed on, overcutting the joyed sounds coming from the other Sisters.

"Hinotama stopped to stare at these, the Bright Ones, for nearly a day, and the brightest of them all—the Bright Lady, may she reign—slept in their center, and she drew Hinotama's eye above all the others." A laugh. "But even the most beautiful of the Bright Ones paled, in Hinotama's eyes, when hunger and thirst called. She made to leave after a time, to tell her Sisters of this strange land and its stranger inhabitants."

"Here is where we find the Salamander in our story," the Grand Mother proclaimed, flinging her arms wide. "Just as Hinotama rose to leave, a Salamander broke through the floor and into the vault of the chrysalises, where it began to attack one of the Bright Ones with sharp claws and breath of fire."

"Hinotama, seeing that the Bright Ones were in danger, was overcome with rage. She struck the animal as it ripped at the Bright One's resting place, severing pieces of it before it turned its claws on Hinotama, and then Hinotama did battle with the beast."

The old woman's voice dropped to urgent hisses: "Swift did her blade strike, and true, and Hinotama managed to slay the Salamander in a battle fought on even ground." Sadness made her eyes drop closed, made her fists clench on her chest. "But our beloved leader did this at the cost of her own suffering. Bleeding from a wound she would surely die from, she fell atop the Salamander's body, all awash in its blood."

The Grand Mother's eyes opened, scanning the hushed room.

"She closed her eyes," she said, "to let the deep sleep of death wash over her."

Just before a grieving wail could rise to full heights, the Grand Mother raised a hand. "However," she said slyly, "death was not Hinotama's fate. She was awoken from her final slumber by a bright light, and as she watched the chrysalis that had been the Salamander's prey split open. From it burst a woman clothed in naught but her own smooth skin, and when she saw Hinotama her blue eyes softened."

Reverence; love; trust; those were the things in the sighs echoing all around me.

"This Bright One was grateful for being saved from the jaws of the Salamander," the Grand Mother explained. "It took many weeks, but the Bright One nursed Hinotama back to health with what looked like magic. She had objects with her in her chrysalis that she used to clean and bind our Mother's wounds, and during their time together she taught Hinotama the beginnings of the Sacred Tongue."

_English_, I thought. _The lady in the ruins of America taught a demon… English. _

_Something tells me I need to take a good, long look at these 'chrysalis' things._

"When Hinotama's strength returned in full, she took the Bright One back with her to her Sisters. The Bright One, who called herself Sarah—"

_An American name,_ I noted numbly.

"—did not wish to leave her Bright Sisters behind, but she told Hinotama that she could not open their chrysalises by herself. Someone else—the Bright Lady herself, in fact—would have to do it, since she is the only one with that power."

"Back in the camp Hinotama had left behind, the Sisters had despaired, thinking their beloved leader was dead. In their grief they had let themselves be driven out of their temporary haven by another troop of demons, and when Hinotama found them wandering aimlessly and hungry, she told them of the abandoned land far to the west, the land of the Bright Ones from the Heavens. Protected by whirlpools mounts in a nearby forest could easily traverse, it would be a perfect new home."

"And here we are!" someone called.

"Elated," the Grand Mother agreed, "they traveled to the land we have today, with Bright One Sarah to lead the way. But that is not the end of our story with the Bright Ones."

"Sarah taught us much about medicine and nutrition, helping us grow strong in our youths and recover from whatever wounds our business brought. But she was weak in body compared to us, so we protected her in exchange for her wisdom and teachings."

"Praise to the wisdom of the Bright Ones!" someone shouted.

"But as time elapsed," said the Grand Mother, "Sarah grew weak. Her flesh lost its suppleness and her lungs grew harsh with cough. Breathing labored, we could do nothing for her as she slipped from this life… to the one beyond." A deep breath made the old woman's body shudder. "Death claimed her, and we could do nothing."

One Sister burst into tears at that, and many more followed suit. Soon the sounds of sobbing, grief, and sorrow made the room ring.

"Her dying wish was for us to await the coming of her sleeping Sisters." The Grand Mother held out her arms as if to embrace her Sisters, voice resonating with fierce, desperate triumph. "To this day we have honored Lady Sarah's wishes, watching over the Hall of Chrysalises and practicing the Sacred Tongue for when one of her number wakes up. And wake up they do—every hundred years or so, one of the chrysalises will break open, waking its Sleeper to the world. We have had many Bright Ones over the millennia, and they have each had something new and important to teach us. We have light because of them, and our health, and the stone buildings you see today."

Triumph faded into even sharper agony. "But none of them lived for more than two months before succumbing to the Sickness that killed Lady Sarah," she said in a rush. "They are not from our world and they are not meant to live here; our unholy air is toxic to them. We bury all those who die with sadness and much mourning, because each Bright One is precious to us and a Sister."

Nik and Herina, on my either side, had broken down into silent tears. "Are you OK?" I asked them, but all they did was shake their heads and look solemnly at the ground.

"A question, Sister from another land?"

Startled, I looked up to find the Grand Mother looking at me directly.

"They cry," I said, and that small phrase was enough to merit an answer, of sorts.

"None of the Bright Ones have awoken in centuries, Elaina," said the Grand Mother gently. Her voice carried; sobs rose in pitch. "We give them offerings often, but no matter what we do they remain asleep." Her voice dropped even lower. "And their numbers dwindle. Some of their lights have disappeared for reasons we know not, and the Dark Ones…"

She trailed off, face contorting painfully. At the sound of her words, Herina and Nik looked up with fierce, twin growls.

"The Dark What?" I asked, not liking the sound of their reaction one bit.

"The Dark Ones," the Grand Mother explained. "They have existed for as long as the Bright Ones have been a part of our lives, and their violence and darkness are the antitheses to the Bright Ones' goodness and love. We have long fought against the Dark Ones, for they wish to destroy the Bright Ones altogether."

"But, why would they want to do that?" I asked, not getting it. _If the Bright Ones are Americans, or something like them, who the hell are the Dark Ones? Canadians?_

"We do not know," the Grand Mother said, shaking her head. "But, one month ago, the leader of the Dark Ones smashed the chrysalis of one of the last Bright Ones left to us, and there was nothing we could do to bring her back to life."

A pause, one rent with cries and piercing calls of rage.

"He killed her," Herina whispered, and she put a hand over her face.

Blank faced, the Grand Mother said: "There is only one Bright One left at this point—the Bright Lady herself."

"I'm… sorry," I said.

But the Grand Mother only shrugged. "We hope that our praise rouses her tonight," she said. "Other nights we don't, because we know she would only sicken like the others." She regarded me coolly, then smiled. "But things are different now."

The way she was looking at me made me uncomfortable. "Different?" I asked.

"Yes," she said. "Different."

From the depths of her robe, she drew the gasmask.

_My_ gasmask.

"I know who you are, Elaina," she said, leaning so her mouth brushed past my ear. I couldn't move, couldn't think ,couldn't even breathe. "The last Bright One to awaken drew plans for an object that would keep their kind from sickening, but she took the plans with her and disappeared before the object could ever be made." She dropped the mask in my lap; it felt as heavy as a stone.

"_This_ is that object," she said softly.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Chapter title song is by Rihanna, and though it has NOTHING to do with this chapter (other than it being a weird rewording of "I know who you are", kind of) it's got a nice beat. Sort of. I only like this one remix of it with lots of heavy metal, but… urgh. I'm not a huge fan of hers, but the remixed song is nice._

_I really wanted to write one more scene and it would have been awesome, too, but I just couldn't summon up the willpower. Urgh. This chapter took a lot out of me for no good reason. I'm looking back at it and just kind of saying 'meh,' since it's mostly just exposition and stuff, but I suppose chapters like this are needed from time to time, and… (*Sheepish*) Yeah, I'll probably go back and expand this at some point, but this week hasn't been so great. Lots of doctor visits and friends-having-stupid-drama-they-really-just-need-to-get-over-because-they're-being-dramatic-and-it's-not-even-that-important-in-the-first-place. You know what I mean._

_Anyway. More plot from here on out, including just what the hell the GM meant by "I know who you are", the Bright Ones and who/what they are (or is it obvious?), the Dark Ones (I SWEAR THEY'RE IMPORTANT TO THE OVERALL PLOT!), and just where the hell is Seishou in all of this? Also, we'll be seeing a lot more of Ryu and Hogosha… oh, in the next chapter. (*winky face that turns into a spastic twitch*) It shall be grand. And fun. But also not nice. Urgh._

_So I have a new poll up. This story isn't quite over yet (gotta finish off Demon World then wrap it all up with an EPIC FINAL BATTLE (kidding!)) but still feel like I need to ask: Which of my stories do you want me to update weekly once this one is finished? Votes (or comments if you can't pick one/need to give pros and cons or some other unforeseen things) are appreciated!_

_Also: Will draw the tattoos. Will post them soonish. Is anyone mad that Dani got herself inked? Because it's NOT something I would imagine her doing on her own._

_Anyway, you guys never fail to make my week. You are all AMAZING, and I love you to bits. Etowa-ru, Hiei08, AskingAlice, dudewhere'smyspirit gun, Dragon of Twilight, darkravensnight, Kaiya's Watergarden, American Senpai, Dyani91, SupremeBaka, itsallaboutbob, yumchaitea, chocolateluvr13, Dreamehz, Kai-chan94,DoilyRox, shishifearme, AkaMizu-chan, undercover prep, KoryuElric, Mihakuu, Angel of Randomosity, masuyo shun, DevilAngelWolf27, j.d.y, Kajihenge Yoko, Reclun, colbub, Anon, nothing new in this world, Razorgaze, TallyYoungBlood, Miyakomono, Yoko Kiara14, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Foxgirl Ray, 0nfateswings, KattJeane, Off-Color, ShadowFireFox13, DaAmazing Meepers and FanGirl (Also, Fangirl: Could you please give me an email or another way to contact you? I can't start a conversation with you like this, and I'd really like to. You seem to be demanding answers but you give me no convenient means to give them. I'm willing to talk to you if you'd only give me the chance! Anyway! Remember that this entire thing is written in a language the characters aren't speaking; sometimes, liberties are made when Dani translates from Japanese to English. They're probably saying an equivalent of the word "god" in their original Japanese, but I think seeing Japanese words interspersed amid an English text would be even more "disillusioning" (to use your word) than seeing the word "Christ" crop up on occasion.)_


	50. Chapter 50: What You Are

Future Talk

Chapter 50:

"What You Are"

Or

"All You Need Is Love"

* * *

I wanted to get right to seeing the Bright Lady, of course, but did that happen? OF COURSE NOT.

First we had to feast.

Not that I was complaining, of course. I felt really hungry all of a sudden—ravenous, in fact, because my body had finally metabolized the rest of the energy-potion and was desperate for another energy source—and when Sisters started swarming in from all directions with gigantic platters of food and drink… well, I wasn't one to reject such a blessing, even if my bodily wants did contradict my strategic needs.

The feast reminded me of something out of one of the Arabian Nights, or maybe Gulliver's Travels or some other book detailing the rituals of a foreign land. As the food was brought before us by Sisters who looked like they had barely hit adolescence, dancers came out of the dark, cleared a circle, and began to perform to the music played by the same three Sisters—Oni, Umi, and Enich—I had made music with only days earlier. The music was unlike anything I had heard before, floating to unbelievably high registers before plummeting sharply into deeper notes and pulling back at the last second to compliment a new, singing Sister's voice. I ignored the food as I listened, and just as I had my fill of music and turned to take my fill of food, Oni and Umi got up, took me by the arms, and carried me over to their spot with identically mischievous grins.

Enich gave me an approving look. "Play," she said.

"But I didn't bring my ukulele," I said, fingers drumming nervously on my Salamander-bone staff when I noticed all the expectant eyes on me, and she let out a bright laugh.

"The Grand Mother told me of the songs your power sang," she said, and she picked the music back up.

Hesitantly, since it was only the third time I had ever pulled music from my soul without an instrument to guide me, I settled on the ground, breathed deep, and slipped into theta. I added my own complimentary music to the song Enich played, coaxing harmonic colors it out of the stream before forcing them into the world outside.

Only this time, things were different from the first times I had made music visible. Instead of having the music swirl around me in a giant sphere of lights, all of the sparks and pops and lightning strikes had invaded the sphere on the tip of my staff, making it look like it some sort of high-tech disco ball or a multi-colored static globe, the kind that you press against your hand to see streams of light swarm to the warmth of your skin. I saw the staff and marveled, the bright lights playing over the faces of nearby Sisters, and then I touched the warm sphere with my fingertips and pulled the music free so it could leap into the air above the dancer's heads. All of that took far less concentration and energy than my other attempts, and the part of me that wasn't marveling at the music wondered at this.

The Sisters reacted to my display positively, shouting in approval as they murmured about the newest Sister being a credit to their union, and soon I grew confident enough to twist my music-made-visible into rivers that meandered through the throngs of Sisters themselves, letting it gambol about like a living creature as it thrummed and hummed and sang along with their instruments, bodies, and voices. I wasn't sure what it was about the experience—maybe it was the sheer atmosphere of community and love, or maybe it was the strange ribbons of light that stretched between the tattooed Sisters that I was fairly certain were not products of my music, or maybe it was the vibrating, shining, singing staff under my fingers—but every second spent making music alongside them felt like a homecoming. When the music finally died and the musicians were allowed to partake of the feast itself, the feeling disappeared, as did memories of the songs, like smoke.

"The clouds will clear," one of the songs that I could remember ran, "and show us the reddened moon."

Those words echoed in my ears, and I accepted their predisposed meanings for better, or for worse.

* * *

I was midway through a massive bowl of strange, spicy stew when I finally thought that letting the boys know I was still alive might be a good thing. Thus, it was with hidden motive that I turned to ask Nik, Herina, and Orimand: "Do you think we should take food to our men?"

The three of them—the collective center of attention earlier, but for the moment left alone as everyone settled in to eat—exchanged looks before Nik said: "Mine doesn't need food. He lives on the air." A pause, and then: "A smoke demon, you see, eats the chemicals around us, not food."

Herina, however, studied the leg of meat in her hands and frowned. "My lion demon would like some of this, I'll bet. I haven't fed him since the Hunt."

This surprised me a little. Herina was a delicate, pretty woman who wielded a light bow instead of a hand-to-hand weapon, and I hadn't figured her as the mistress of the brute of a lion demon. In fact, I'd pegged Orimand as his 'owner' since she herself was something of a lioness.

Orimand, from her prone position on her pallet, looked dejected. "Yes, I supposed mine would like something to eat, too." She looked up and gestured to one of the younger Sisters standing nearby, who had been one of the two dozen or so youngsters to bring out the feast dishes—since she had been the one to serve our food and pour our drinks, I supposed she had been assigned to us or something. Anyway, she seemed timid to approach the illustrious quartet of new tattoo-bearers, but when Herina smiled she couldn't help but smile back.

"Has food been brought to our men?" Orimand asked.

I had been hoping her answer would be 'no' so I had an excuse to skip the feast and ask the guys what they made of the Sisters' origins and the Grand Mother's strange words, but the young woman said: "Yes. They have been rewarded for their efforts in the Hunt most generously." She dipped a pretty bow. "Do you need anything more? I'm here to serve."

"We desire nothing but the grace of your smile," Orimand said, and the young woman blushed before backing off with another bow.

Nik raised an eyebrow. "Must you flirt with everything that moves?"

"Only the young and the pretty," Orimand said with a grin, and she lifted a drink to her mouth. She, I decided, was much more mannish that the others, but it suited her and did not, somehow, detract from her femininity.

Herina opened her mouth to give her opinion on the matter when Karla, of all people, popped out of nowhere. She knelt by my side, smiled at the others (though her smile at Orimand was cold, though I had no idea why), and said: "I have been instructed to bind your markings. May I start with you, Orimand? I would like to check your wounds as well."

Orimand nodded, flashing the healer a roguish grin, and Karla got to work. Her hands lacked their usual gentleness, but Orimand merely grunted in discomfort when Karla got rough. Once finished, she wrapped the others before starting on me, and after bidding me to strip from the waist up (a process the others watched with unconcealed interest, much to my chagrin) she wrapped most of my torso in clean linen bandages. She covered my neck up to my chin and my body to just below my breasts, all but eliminating a need for a shirt—I put my zip-up hoodie on anyway, though, because I felt exposed.

"Be sure to eat a good meal," she told the four of us before rising, tipping me a wink, and sauntering off. "Your energy has been drained!"

"I'd let her drain mine if she asked," Orimand said with quiet humor, and Nik socked her in the arm with a closed fist.

"You're terrible," she said, but giggled.

* * *

I was asked to make music a few more times before the Grand Mother took the stage once more, and when she did she merely quieted the room with a sweep of her arms and told us to rise. Everyone did as asked, faces going from celebratory to solemn in an instant, and then she led us—with the four newly tattooed warriors at the front of the procession—into the dark.

Nik offered to carry me, but I just clutched my staff and told her I was fine. The smoothness of the staff felt so right in my hands that I loathed to let it go, and I was able to keep up fairly well since the parade of Sisters was a slow one with grief's tang riding heavy on the air.

I knew why they wore black now, but the grief still took me by surprise and made the breath in my lungs taste sour.

We walked in utter blackness for a time, but Nik's strong hand on my shoulder kept me from freaking out like I wanted. Eventually, however, two lights loomed before us in the dark, and out of the shadows loomed two Riders flanking a large, jagged archway. Iron baskets full of smokeless fire allowed us the ability to file into the crack, which was wide enough to let, say, a Rider through, but only one at a time. Claustrophobic panic made me breathe faster, but the warmth of my staff provided a small comfort and I took to the route in silence.

The narrow tunnel eventually opened up into a new room, one that was twice as big as the first. The ceiling was too high to see in the dark, but large, riveted (_Riveted?_ I thought, confused) steel support beams that stretched up into the blackness told me we were still indoors. We walked between the beams in a path about fifty feet across, and at the base of each beam sat one of the iron fire-baskets to show us the way. The Grand Mother followed them directly forward and across the space, eyes locked ahead of her as she moved, and after a good ten minutes of walking I found myself standing before one of the most incongruous things I had ever seen.

The call it a "door" would be like calling Buckingham Palace a "house"—this thing was _massive_, just plain _huge_, and it was made of a pock-marked metal that had, at one point in the distant past, been smooth. It held a faint green tinge and glowed a little, weirdly enough, so it made the Grand Mother's face appear sick when she walked forward, stared at it, and closed her eyes to bask in its light. It had no marking or hinges to speak of, but deep in my gut I knew the green-silver slab with the hairline black crack down its middle was a door, just the way I knew that the walls it was set in were made not of stone, but of solid metal that was thick enough to withstand the tests of time.

But _what_ was I looking at, really?

I stood and stared at the door for a long time, not knowing what else to do since everyone else—from the Grand Mother to the marked ones to the other Sisters who formed a crowd behind us—was doing precisely the same thing. Some wept openly, their sounds of pain and awe echoing into the shadows around us and reverberating off the strange door, and when footsteps stopped making the darkness ring like a metallic bell the Grand Mother turned to look at her loyal flock.

"Tonight," she said, voice full of hope and despair, "will be different. This much I promise you."

The sounds of weeping grew softer, but no less heartfelt.

Turning back to the door, the Grand Mother walked forward and placed her right hand flat upon it. Her skin seemed bleached in the darkness, and with her left hand she swept back her right sleeve up to the elbow. On her wrist was a thick shackle made of dark glass, glass which would have appeared red had the green light not made it turn to muddy brown, and her fingers nimbly undid the shackle's hidden clasp. A small round section on the top of it popped free, revealing that the shackle was hollow, and she hooked her fingers into its depths with a rattling intake of her breath. From the shackle she drew the end of a braid, one that looked like it was made of pale hair.

_But,_ I thought, _the Sisters all have dark hair… don't they?_

As I watched, the Grand Mother carefully pulled out one shining hair, one as long as my arm that glittered in the light like silk, and then she tucked the braid back into the shackle and pressed the opening closed. She took a step back, holding the tip of the hair between thumb and forefinger, and then she held the hair out as if she were trying to hand it to the door itself—

"The time has come at last," she said, and the Sisters at the back of the hall began to scream. A voice like thunder cut over the horrifying sound, making my knees tremble and bile rise in my throat as I turned and saw the black figure standing at the edge of the crowd, golden eyes radiating intense hatred as he pulled his hand out of the bloodied back of a small girl, the one who had served my food, in fact, and the others scrambled away as she fell, still screaming even though her poor heart had burst, and—

"The only time that comes tonight," Seishou said, not moving forward even though a direct path to the Grand Mother and the door had cleared before him, "is _mine_."

"Sei…" I said, and my voice broke. I couldn't help but cower, hiding behind my staff as I held it before my face in both shaking hands. Memories of his bronze-clawed fingers twining cruelly in my hair, ripping at me as he tried to pull me through the van's windshield, had me whimpering like a child in the wake of his boiling eyes, and then a shadow loomed over me and the Grand Mother stood at my side.

"The Dark One himself," the Grand Mother called, voice booming just as powerfully in the chamber. The screams ceased, and the Sisters stared at the Grand Mother through panicked eyes as they huddled in the dark on the sides of the well-lit path, away from Seishou and out of the line of fire. "Do not fear him, this bringer of death and lies. Fear is _his_ ally and _your_ enemy, Sisters!"

Seishou, the Dark One, _whoever he was_ raised a finger, a finger that glimmered with the same talons I remembered, and he pointed it at the doors. "Give her to me," he said, and the Grand Mother let out a harsh, derisive laugh.

"I have not opened the door, old enemy," she said. "You came too early."

"Not her," he said silkily. "_Her_."

And that's when my naïve little mind realized where he was _really_ pointing.

He was pointing, of course, straight at me.

Nik and Herina stepped in front of me, ruby-red weapons at the ready. Orimand sat up despite her wounds, staring at the Dark One like she could kill him with a look, but he remained oblivious and took a step toward where we stood.

"I thought you sought the Bright Lady, Dark One," the Grand Mother said, holding up hand to stay the attacks of my friends.

Seishou said: "I do. But this one will do for now, _bitch_."

Nik let out an enraged cry, darting forward with her sword held high above her head, and before she even got to Seishou she was thrown off her feet and sent skittering backward, sliding to a stop on her back at the Grand Mother's feet. Her face streamed blood, beaten to a pulp by Seishou's unseen blow.

"Her chances of survival are higher than the Bright Lady's," he said, speaking as if nothing had happened. "I can't say the same for you, bitch, if you choose to interfere." His gold eyes blazed with enough light to blind me. "Give the girl to me and no one else will die."

"We would sooner die, all of us, than give any Sister of ours up to you, you beast!" Herina choked out, and her voice, though weak, held conviction. Several other Sisters shouted similar threats, but for a moment I was afraid I would be thrown forward into his arms, to be taken into the dark and never—

Rather than answer him, the Grand Mother looked skyward. "NOW!" she boomed, and out of the shadows above came a roar and a rush of wind. From the rafters above dropped the Riders, Krishna and Sarka and the one who had found me in the woods among them, and the Riders filled up the space around Seishou with bristling fur and sharper weapons. Their cries made my ears ache; my hands went up to close them on reflex, and they converged upon the man in black like a living typhoon.

_Surely even Seishou couldn't survive an onslaught like that,_ I thought, and then I was proven wrong.

The Riders were pushed back a second later, a wall of nothing throwing them backward into the crowd of other Sisters, who scrambled to get out of their way unscathed. The squirrels hit the ground with earth-shaking force, a series of small quakes that made my feet tingle up the soles, and despite how easily he had repelled them Seishou's black cloak rippled, expanded, and spun as he lifted into the air, swirled, and darted out of the hall like a grim reaper in flight. The Riders bounded after him, giving game chase off into the dark where I could not see, and when the pounds of their footfalls stopped shaking the ground I slumped, fingers on my staff the only things that kept me from collapsing on the ground.

I saw Karla come running out of the weeping crowd and slide to a stop next to Nik. Her face paled as she reached into the bag on her hip, and then my vision was blocked by soft black cloth and hard blue hands. The Grand Mother gripped my arms and leveled me upright, staring into my face with bright eyes and an insane grin stretching her lips to the breaking point.

"I knew it was you," she said, strong voice turned soft and insistent. "I knew it from the moment I felt your energy. You're _her_. The one I've been waiting for all this time."

I think I was still in shock when I said, voice quivering, "I'm _nobody_, really, I'm nobody at all—", but the Grand Mother shook me, once, and my protests were cut short.

"Your mother would be proud of you," she said. "She would be very proud, Danielle."

* * *

Before the fact that _she knew my freaking name, and not just the nickname people in this world knew me by_, Krishna ran in, told the Grand Mother that the Dark One was cornered in the city, and that she should come quickly to aid them with her strength and guidance. The Grand Mother shoved me into Herina's arms with the instructions to stay put with the non-fighters, and before I knew it I was sitting a few feet from the weird door and staring at Karla as she bound up Nik's head in strands of clean white cloth. When she was through, she went to the girl Seishou had killed (_had shoved his hand straight through!_ a part of me screamed, but I tried not to listen to it).

Other Sisters had gathered around the fallen girl, but it was Karla who turned her over, stared into her face, and began to say something I was too far away to hear. Her lips moved, and then she leaned forward to press a kiss to the dead girl's forehead before closing the eyes and arranging the limbs into a more dignified shape. She stood, face impassive, to watch the others stroke the child's hair and weep, and then she walked over to us.

"She was my sister," she said thickly, black eyes swimming in unshed tears, and I realized that she didn't mean that in a tribal way.

I didn't know what to do. Who could ever hope to understand her pain, her grief? So I floundered, and then I just walked forward, wrapped my arm around her waist, and held her. She pressed her face into my hair and sobbed, once, before stepping back, wiping her eyes on her sleeve, and sitting down on the ground with her face in her hands.

"Give me something to do, Elaina," she said softly, voice lacking any trace of tears. "Please. I need to look at something other than death and blood for a few minutes."

This time, I actually had an idea.

The fact that I was using Karla's grief to serve my own purposes was something I tried not to look at too closely.

* * *

The Sisters sat in small groups, comforting each other with gentle words in the almost-dark, as Karla led me out of the chamber and through the long, dark crack in the wall that would take us back to the other hall. Guards on the crack's other side questioned us briefly, and when Karla told them that I wanted to check on my men after seeing the Dark One so close by, they let us pass on without further ado.

Karla moved quickly through the dark, never getting us lost even once even though we moved through a veritable maze of passageways_. No wonder Hinotama got lost in here,_ I found myself thinking, and just as the thought materialized a light flashed ahead of us. Before long I found myself in the hall, leftover food lying on the ground like nothing had happened in our absence, and we walked toward the small man-cave in silence. A few meters away from it, however, Karla stopped walking.

"I'll wait out here," she said, and her voice cracked on the last word.

I walked forward and put my hand in hers; she squeezed my fingers.

"Are you sure you want to be alone?" I asked. "I know it's no comparison, but after killing the Salamander I thought that's what I wanted, but it wasn't what I _needed_." When she said nothing, I added: "You can stay with me if you want. I don't mind at all."

"Elaina the Compassionate," she said, smiling with a tear in her eye. She did not look at me. "The name suits you."

The compliment made me uncomfortable. "I mean what I said," I replied, but she just shook her head.

"I need time to process this," she said, and she dropped my hand. "I need time to grieve on my own, before the wounded Riders come back and need an impartial healer to tend them. I can't heal," she waved a hand at the liquid on her face, "like _this_."

"You know where to find me, Karla," I told her, and against my better judgment I let her walk off into the gloom, alone.

* * *

"You're alive!" Kuwabara, who saw me come in first, said, jumping to his feet. He crossed the cave in a second and pulled me into a hug, but his arms pressed into my tattoo and set it on fire with sudden pain as he lifted me, squeezing, off the floor.

"WATCH THE BACK!" I shrieked, and he dropped me. I hit my foot, of course, and staggered until my staff caught me almost on its own.

"Tattoo," I said, pointing at my back as I wheezed the pain away. "Still tender."

"I am _so sorry_!" Kuwabara fretted, hands flapping around my face in an attempt to fan me, or something. It was hard to tell given the panicked expression on his face.

"It's OK," I said, and I straightened up. I give them a collective critical look. "Did they feed you? Because they said they did but I wasn't sure…"

Yusuke pointed at the empty bowls and plates spread all along the ground. "We picnicked," he said, and grinned. "We could feel your spirit energy so we knew you were alive, but those screams of yours—"

I winced. "Yeah. I tried keeping quiet, but… you know me."

"Lungs like a banshee; we got it," Yusuke said.

Hiei, meanwhile, had been looking me up and down with shrewd eyes, and then his gaze settled on my neck. He did not appear happy; he was wearing his somewhat twitchy I-want-to-say-something-but-I-don't-know-if-I'm-overreacting-yet scowl. "Bandages?" he finally settled on, and I nodded. "How big is this tattoo of yours, exactly?"

"Any bigger and it wouldn't fit," I said dismissively. I sat down with a thud, staff between my legs as I leaned my cheek against the cool silk of its body.

Yusuke's eyes lit up. "That's what she said?" he said, not sure if it was actually applicable, and when I shot him a thumbs up his expression cleared. "Hell yeah! That's what _she_ said!"

Kuwabara put a hand over his face as Kurama sighed and said: "I was hoping we had seen the last of this."

Hiei stared at Yusuke like he'd just announced that he was actually a woman in disguise. "_What _was that?" Hiei said, disgusted. "Do not speak to her that way!"

Yusuke pointed at me. "Hey, Dani made it up, not me!"

"No I didn't!" I said, jaw dropping. "Just because I taught it to you doesn't mean I made it—"

"As far as we're concerned, it does," Kurama said dryly.

Yusuke nodded in agreement, but I stopped dead because Hiei had a vein pulsing in his temple and I knew that a subject change would be a good thing, and then I remembered the little girl falling, Nik's mangled face, Karla's tears—

"What the hell am I sitting her joking around for?" I asked myself, horrified. "Fuck it, there's no time for this!"

"Yes there is—" Yusuke started to say, but I picked up my staff and aimed a jab at his shins. He dodged, of course, but I didn't even think about payback because the sheer enormity of the situation had jumped on me like a pack of hungry wolves.

"No there's not!" I snapped. "_Seishou is here_!"

Everyone froze.

"Explain," Kurama said, and he sat down across from me with a mask of cool, even temper on his face. "We sensed nothing."

I jumped right in. "Did you guys hear the screaming a little while ago? Not from me getting tattooed, but—"

They looked at each other darkly. "We did," Hiei growled, looking me up and down again.

"I'm not hurt," I said, trying to sound reassuring, but when he just looked agitated I decided I could comfort him later. "Well, that was Seishou popping in for a cup of tea. But seriously, Seishou is the Dark One and he—"

"Wait, the _Dark_ One? I thought we were dealing with the _Bright_ Lady?" Kuwabara said, looking confused.

I swore. "We are, there are Dark Ones and Bright Ones now, too, and there's the Bright Lady but her enemy is a guy called the Dark One, who is actually Seishou, but—"

"The beginning, Dani," Kurama said, impatience cracking his cool mask. "Start with the tattoos and this new addition of yours—" he waved a hand at the staff "—and go from there."

I did as he asked, sketching a brief portrait of getting the tattoo with Salamander blood, my new title, and the staff of Salamander bone before I got to the part about the Sisters' origins. I got through the "fire rained" bit without interruption, and then I described the Bright Ones in their chrysalises and how Lady Sarah taught the Sisters English and other fun stuff, and I was just starting the bit about the Dark One when Kuwabara interrupted me.

"Wait, wait, _wait_! Didn't America rain from the sky?" he asked. When I nodded, he said: "And the ladies who came out of the pods spoke _English_? Doesn't that sound like these Bright One people are actually, you know, _Americans_?"

I shook my head and threw up my hands. "I don't fucking _know_, man. We had guys when I was alive—uh, lived in America, that is. So why there are only women in the chrysalises is anyone's guess and I sure as _hell_ didn't come out of a butterfly cocoon!"

"We can discuss that later, so get to Seishou's introduction," Kurama said.

"The Bright Ones have an arch-nemesis like all good gods and superheroes should," I said, sparing no time for an introduction. "They call the leader of them 'the' Dark One, and he has some follower things called Dark _Ones_, plural. Apparently he's been picking off the Bright Ones one by one for just about forever, and only the Bright Lady is left at this point. They want to use my gasmask to protect her and junk—"

"Another reason why they're probably Americans, who're human and who'd need the mask to survive!" Kuwabara said in triumph.

"Yeah, but Dani survived the air here, didn't she?" Yusuke said. "And if she's one of them that doesn't make sense!"

Though they both had good points, Kurama, Hiei, and I glared at them, and they shut up.

"She took out the mask right before we went to see the Bright Lady, and she said that the last Bright One to wake up drew up plans to make the same type of mask," I said. Kurama raised an eyebrow. "I think she thinks I'm that Bright One's daughter or something, but that doesn't jive with her old you-are-the-child-of-a-shapeshifter theory, so I'm pretty confused on that point."

"Ascertaining the true nature of the Bright Ones will help us sort that out," Kurama said. "May we get back to Seishou, please?"

"Sure." I took a deep breath before going on. "We went to go visit the Bright Lady when they finished telling about their origins," I went on. "The Lady's behind a big glowing door thing that looks way more high tech than anything the Sisters are capable of, but whatever, OK? The Grand Mother has this weird braid of hair hidden in her bracelet, and she took out one of the hairs and was about to put it on the door when Seishou showed up."

"You mean he appeared in the middle of this place?" Kurama said, shocked, and I nodded.

"Ryu can make those teleporting knives, remember?" I said.

"Oh, we remember all right," Yusuke said. He seemed a bit peeved at that, and Hiei looked just plain pissed at the memory. Sensing there was a story here, I raised an eyebrow in hopes someone would elaborate.

"Hogosha came to talk to him a few minutes before the screaming started," Kuwabara obligingly told me. "They were speaking your language, English or whatever, and afterward Ryu got all excited and used one of his knives to get the hell out of here."

"He must have known that Seishou was about to strike," Kurama murmured.

The sound of the scary man's name made me start. "Ugh, back to my story. Seishou showed up, and the Grand Mother said he was the Dark One."

"You're sure it was him?" Hiei asked.

"Yeah. Very." I shuddered. "He's the Dark One all right, which means he's been a part of this _mess_ and this _place_ for millennia. Whatever that implies."

"But how does Ryu, who is a mere human, factor in to this?" Kurama mused.

"I don't know. All I know is that Seishou showed up, that he's the Dark One, and that he killed…"

I swallowed, remembering Karla and her quiet grief with a pang of regret. No one said anything until I looked up, blinking back tired tears, and said: "Karla's younger sister was killed. Then Seishou pointed at me and said that no one else had to die if I was handed over."

Heady silence made looking at their quiet faces difficult, but I managed to keep my eyes on them until Hiei caught my gaze. His fierce look made my own look splinter in two, and I hastily glanced away.

"And did they _try_ to give you to him?" Hiei snarled, about ready to punch someone judging by the set of his shoulders, but I shook my head.

"No." I looked down at my lap. "I wish they had, though." Yusuke started to protest, but I said: "I know you all would save me if that happened, which is why I wouldn't complain. That girl…" I shook my head. "She didn't have to die for me."

"Hey, it's not _your_ fault Seishou's a psychopath," Kuwabara said, but I just smiled a weak, vapid smile.

"I haven't even gotten to the best part of the whole thing," I said, forcing cheer into my tone. "As soon as the Riders chased him off, the Grand Mother turned to me and said she knew exactly who I was and that she had been waiting for me. Crazy, right?"

"Crazy," Kurama echoed. "Yes, it's quite crazy indeed."

"And she knew my name and everything!" I went on. _That_ sure got everyone's attention; all eyes locked on me as I said: "She called me 'Danielle'—I bet none of _you_ even remembered that that's my full name!"

Yusuke gaped. "She… "

"Yup," I said. "She called me 'Danielle'. That's my name, don't wear it out." I laughed out loud. "I can't begin to tell you guys how confused I am. I'm some weird celebrity who can't figure out why they're famous, like Paris Hilton or something!"

"Who?" asked Kuwabara.

"Never you mind," I said. I put my head in my hands, shifting my staff to the crook of my elbow for safekeeping. "The Grand Mother kept telling me that my mother would be proud of me and that the Sisters have been waiting for me for a long time, but as far as I know my mom was born in Nebraska, raised on a farm, and worked at the—"

I stopped cold and looked at the guys as a very specific memory swam forward.

I guess I looked grave, because Hiei looked like he was about ready to strangle me when I stopped talking. "What is it?" he said, taking a step toward me.

"I just made something make sense," I said, "and I don't like it."

He knelt in front of me. "Tell me," he demanded, and when I couldn't find the words to speak he put a hand on my shoulder. "_Tell me_," he said, and my tongue loosened as a wall of his warmth made my tense shoulders relax in spite of themselves.

"My mom worked for the Center for Disease Control," I said slowly, holding his eyes. Kurama, meanwhile, went still at my implication. "She had to work with dangerous pathogens and stuff. Probably knew her way around a gasmask pretty well." I ran my fingers through my hair; Hiei's hand fell away. "She quit her job when I was born but she had this award on our mantel for being a great technician, and—Holy _crap_, I had totally forgotten! What the hell, am I really that _stupid_?"

"But your mother was neither a shapeshifter nor a Bright One, correct?" Kurama said.

"Shapeshifter, no, but a Bright One, who the _hell_ knows?" I said. Hiei got up and started pacing; I rubbed my temples and closed my eyes. "What the heck does all of this _mean_?"

Inside I was thinking far more dangerous thoughts: _What has Koenma been keeping from me? Am I really from another world? Aside from dying in that mugging, it's feeling more and more likely that I've been from this world all along! But how does that explain how I know about Yu Yu Hakusho? Am I just crazy? Is Koenma really just an illusion or something? Is—_

Kurama looked ominously thoughtful, but eventually he said: "I think that focusing on your role in all of this is not of immediate importance, Dani." Before anyone could say a word, he held up a hand and said: "We are here to bring in Ryu, and now we are here to bring in Seishou since he is connected with this place in ways we did not foresee, and we are _also_ here to stop both of them from achieving their goals. Since the Bright Lady is, we believe, unreachable, and Ryu and Seishou are currently unavailable—"

"Seishou's in the city, actually," I said. "I heard the Riders' leader say it to the Grand Mother. They're fighting him there."

Kurama looked to Hiei. "Can you confirm?"

Hiei's eyes grew distant and the air grew a touch more warm. "She speaks the truth," he eventually said. "They have him surrounded in the square."

"That changes this game, then," Kurama said, eyes brightening. "Since Ryu is missing and Seishou is _close by_, I feel that it is in our best interests to go after Seishou and attempt to bring him down. The Sisters may have weakened him enough to make our job easy. If we are unable to bring in Seishou, who seems to be a bigger threat than Ryu since his motive is within reach and Ryu's is not, we will locate and bring in Ryu instead. If we fail in both those things, we will shift our attention to the Bright Lady."

"What? Why her?" Yusuke asked.

"We want what Seishou _doesn't_ want," Kuwabara explained, looking haughty since he knew more than Yusuke. "Since he wants the Lady, we _don't_ want him to get her, which means we want her for _ourselves_. Right, Kurama?"

"I couldn't have explained it better myself," Kurama said. He stood up, looking to the others with an expression set in stone. "Since it is wise to strike while the iron is hot, as they say, we should go after Seishou before he moves. Yusuke, be pin-pointing Ryu's location with your locating device while we travel."

"Will do," Yusuke said, rolling up his cuff so he could look at the Spirit World watch with screwed-up eyes.

Kurama turned to me. "Is the Bright Lady's door guarded?"

I nodded. "And considering that the Sisters are out for the Dark One's blood, I don't think he'll be able to come back here any time soon." I frowned. "Unless Ryu made him more than one knife, of course, but I still don't think he could get through those doors. They looked solid."

Kurama's brow knit. "In any event, I doubt Ryu can make too many knives at one time. If he used one himself and gave one to Seishou, _and_ gave one to Hogosha as he probably did, I doubt he had energy to make more. No, I am willing to bet that they are stuck where they are for the time being."

I nodded again. "Fine. You guys go after Seishou and Ryu, and I'll hold down the fort here."

Kurama looked at me, smiled, then glanced at the others. His gaze lingered on Hiei when he said: "I need to prepare you for the worst, Dani."

My heart kicked up a notch. "Which is?"

"If we were to fall to Seishou or Ryu," Kurama said with unerring calm, "you are to get out of here and back to the temple as quickly as possible. Do you understand that?"

I hesitated. "You won't fall," I said, looking at Hiei for a second, "but I understand."

He seemed satisfied and turned away, hair swinging in a garnet wave. "And if we manage to capture one or both of them, you need to be prepared to be left here, too, since we will need all of our power to keep them in check. You have friends, however, and we will come back for you, so I do not see that being much of an issue."

I swallowed. "Sure thing."

Yusuke pounded a fist into his palm. "Finally, we get to see some action!" he said, heading for the mouth of the cave. "C'mon guys! Daylight's wastin'!"

We followed him out, watching as he stretched and jogged in place to psych himself up, and then Yusuke started walking off into the dark. "This way!" he called.

"Good luck, Yusuke!" I called after him.

"See ya, Dani!" his voice echoed, and Kuwabara stopped to ruffle my still-blonde hair before moving after the eager spirit detective.

"We'll see you when we get back," he said, grinning like a loon. "And we will get back, I promise. I have homework to do!"

"You'd _better_!" I told him, scowling, and he just ruffled my hair again. I swatted his hand away. "Hey, quit that! I'm not a little kid!"

"Yeah, the laugh-lines are kind of obvious," he teased.

"I think my mother aged very well, actually," I said, and I tossed my hair. "So shut it. I wear her trouble-making face with pride."

"Uh-huh," he said, and he gave me one last ruffle before walking off. "Take care, Dani!"

"You too, Kuwabara!" I yelled. The bandages around my neck itched a little; it was hot, and I loosened them with a finger as I waved at his retreating back.

Kurama walked past with a smirk. "May I have a good-luck wish?" he asked, and I slugged him in the arm.

"Duh," I said, and he vanished. Sighing as I watched them go and not liking the uneasy feeling growing in the pit of my stomach, I started to call for Karla and turned, only to find myself standing a few inches from Hiei. I reeled back in surprise, but his hand shot out and caught my staff and held it steady. We didn't say anything for a few second and just looked at one another, and then he let my staff go.

"You scared me," I said accusingly, tugging at the bandages on my neck because I still felt stuffy, and Hiei shrugged.

"No goodbye for _me_?" he said, mocking me a little before his smirk faded into mere disquiet as he stared down into my face.

"You wanted a parade, maybe?" I joked, feeling a little awkward for reasons I didn't want to look at under a microscope. "Sorry, I'm fresh out of balloons and stuff. Make do with some cheering?"

Rather than answer my undignified ramblings, he merely raised an eyebrow.

"I can offer you a hug," I said, but despite the joke Hiei's head tilted to one side and his eyes narrowed. "What, too much for you to handle?" I teased, and he shook his head.

"It's forward of you," he remarked lazily, "but I can handle it."

I blinked. "Handle what?"

"A 'hug', as you call it," he said. When I didn't move, he said: "What are you waiting for?"

My jaw dropped. "You mean you _actually_ want me to _hug_ you?" I asked in disbelief, and his lips twitched the way they did when he was amused with patience wearing thin.

"Does that strike you as funny, Dani?" he asked.

"Well, you're not the touchy type so—"

His eyes turned hard. "I'm not laughing," he said, and waited.

Rather than think about it and only make a stuttering fool out of myself, I just walked forward, closed the distance between us, and slid my arms around his waist. It was like walking into a sauna, although in the best way possible, and I couldn't help but sigh as I pressed my palms against his solid shoulder blades and squeezed us together once, lightly, before pulling away. It took a few horrendously embarrassing seconds to complete the action, but when I finished I was blushing like Snow White's apple regardless.

Hiei stared at me, eyes narrowed with hands balled into fists at his sides. He seemed more tense than he had all night, and that's saying something.

But why? It was just a hug!

Unable to take the silence, I blurted: "You're a lousy hugger, you know."

That made him pull back a little, eyes snapping open wide in surprise. "What is _that_ supposed to mean?" he said, incensed.

"It means you didn't hug me back, you jerk," I said with half a heart. "It's like hugging a wall, or something. Where's the fun in that?"

He paused, thinking about it, and let out a low, spine-tingling chuckle as he shut his eyes. "I thought I was being considerate," he said, and then he looked at my neck.

"Oh," I managed to say, and my tattoo twinged in response. The tattoo felt hot, I realized—very hot. I wasn't sure why, but oddly enough I didn't dislike it. I didn't _like_ it, of course, but it wasn't a _bad_ feeling, kinda nice if I thought about it, all comforting like a weird purr of sheer temperature, but…

Hiei walked past me, eyes on the darkness ahead. "Go back to the other women," he said, jamming his fists into his pocket. "You'll be safe with them."

"Sure," I said, and he had just vanished into the shadows when I managed to say: "Hey, Hiei?"

I did not get an answer, but somehow I know he heard me when I said: "Don't die, OK? Because I'd cry, and we all know that that's not a pretty sight."

I know he heard me because, on the very edge of my hearing, I heard him chuckle.

Unmistakably, my tattoo burned in response.

* * *

I walked around the circle twice, softly calling Karla's name. She did not answer me, however, and after a long half-hour of lonely wandering, my wits were at their end.

"Karla, listen, I know you're sad, but I need you, OK?" I called, peeved but still trying to be sensitive. "Please come out? Please?"

That was when, low and behold, I heard a rustle of cloth. I spun, overjoyed that I was no longer alone, and I said: "Thank goodness, I was getting so worried about you—Oh. _Oh_. Hello."

She inclined her head, blue eyes blazing with polite fire. "Hello, Dani," Hogosha said in her special, musical way. "I hope I find you well?"

"As well as I can be under the circumstances," I said, heart running a race with my whirling mind. "Where's Karla?"

"Asleep," Hogosha said. She held out her hands, showing them to be empty, but I knew better when I saw her right hand's bloated palm and lattice-work fingers. "I mean you no harm. Ryu merely wishes to speak to you. Come with me willingly, and this will be quick, efficient, and painless for us both."

I thought about it. Then I said "Not likely," and I dove inside myself.

I didn't really know what I was doing, of course, so when I pulled the music out of my soul by the handful and shoved the discordant avalanche into the real world, I didn't quite know what to expect. The staff was shaking so hard with pent-up sound that I had to hold it in both hands to keep it from flying out of my grasp, and the sphere on the end shone like a miniature, multi-colored sun when I opened my eyes to look at my creation. I swung the staff like a baseball bat because I wasn't sure how else to release the music, and at the height of my swing the staff seemed to understand my meaning because it let all of it out at once. Colors and lights shot straight at Hogosha in a beam of unfiltered, uncoordinated noise, noise that made my eardrums shrivel in my head like dried beans, and I smiled as the light flew straight and true and appeared to collide with Hogosha in a firework burst of bright colors and screeching treble notes and throbbing bass. I let out a triumphant whoop as the light began to fade and the noise drifted off into nothing, pleased with my efforts and new talent—

"An amateurish attack," Hogosha said from behind me, and then a hand covered my mouth and nose. I kicked and scratched as she crushed me back into her body, music-hand snatching up my staff so she could throw it to the ground (it hit the floor with a sound like a bell), and I tried to breathe but I couldn't, I just couldn't, and—

"Sleep," was the last thing I heard before passing out, and the last things I thought were: _Stupid OCs, getting kidnapped all the damn time, _and_ Hiei's gonna kill me._

* * *

Predictably, because this cliché was one I knew I could count on, I awoke in chains.

My wrists were shackled together above my head. The manacles were connected to a thick wooden rafter overhead by a thick chain, and I had just enough slack to bend my knees and take a half-step in any direction besides backward. There was a wall behind me, you see, one I could lean on, and in front of me lay a small room lit by three electric lanterns hanging from other rafters. A table sat in the middle of the room, and around it were three rough wooden chairs. A cot lay in the corner, but other than those things it was a very bare space.

And oh yeah, Hogosha stood a few inches in front of me, leaning down so she could stare into my face with curious eyes. I pulled back with a yelp, still delirious from my black-out, and the blue-skinned, white-haired, giant-Smurf-look-alike tilted her head to the side with a small smile.

"You're awake," she observed in English. Her brow knit in remorse. "I feel I must apologize for the way I treated you. I did not want to use force."

What was I supposed to do, say I forgave her? I settled on "It's OK" in the end, and she accepted it readily enough for my tastes. Too readily, maybe?

"Ryu will be here soon," she said, and then her expression clouded. She moved back, obviously troubled, and sat on the table. It groaned beneath her considerable weight as she said: "I could be what he needs, you know."

I had no idea what she meant, so I just said: "Good for you."

"I mean it," she persisted. I was struck, suddenly, by a sudden sense of her childishness. "I am as much of what he needs as you are—what you are, so I am." She stared down at her folded hands. "I would be, that is, if only he'd see me for it."

"And what is it he needs, exactly?" I asked.

She seemed surprised. "Why, love, of course. I am in love with him."

My mouth worked at her bald confession, and I rolled my shoulders to get their blood flowing again. "And he doesn't see that?" I finally said.

She looked away. "He does not _want_ love," she said slowly, mood going from childish to dark in the span of a moment. Her voice lost its pleading register, choosing instead to growl and hiss over the Japanese syllables. Why had she changed languages? "He wants _symbolism_, not true love! He wants a woman who he can point to and say 'Look at her, my wife, the woman who is as much an outcast as I am! This woman of strength who loves me despite our differences, this woman who chose to go on when the world cast her aside and told her she was less than, not good enough, a _freak'_."

"_I'm_ a freak," she went on, rising to pace the floor. "I am a half-breed mongrel with nowhere to turn—my Sisters reject me for my blood, and my heart rejects _them_ for a man who won't have me despite all I gave up to serve him."

My heart gave a small pang when I thought of Koenma and his lies, lies which were only deepening the closer to the truth I grew. He said he cared for me, but how could he when the truth went so against everything he'd ever told me?

Despite my care for him, I felt a new emotion—the emotion of betrayal, pain, and anger—ripple into me.

"I love someone, too, you know," I told her. Her wild eyes locked on me. "It's with someone I can't ever, ever be with." My head dropped when I smiled a bitter smile. "I've made sacrifices for him and I love him, but he tells me that he keeps things from me for my own good, and the more I learn, the more I realize that I feel betrayed despite his promises." I looked up at her; she was breathing hard fast. "You and me, we're more alike than we know. I'm still pining after _him_, and you're still pining after Ryu. I think the both of us should just move on." My head dropped. "Or we should just accept it, at the very least."

She came close again, and her fingers gently gripped my jaw so I had to look into her face.

"I gave up everything I had to belong nowhere," she said, "and it was all for _him_."

"I left my old life behind to come here," I said. "My parents are dead and I'm putting my life on the line for a world that's not even _mine_. All for _him_."

Her fingers ground into my skin. "But the difference," she said, and the malice in her tone was not meant for me despite her words, "is that my love rejects _me_ for _you_! You who betrayed him and gave him nothing but a false hope because of your uncouth breeding!" She growled like a rabid animal, and when I pulled away she held on tight, screaming: "You've been nothing but a thorn in his side since the moment you met, and _look_ at him! Pining for you, devising ways to ensnare you, abandoning old alliances to protect the woman who wants him _dead_! Dead, Dani—you want him DEAD!"

"That is quite enough, Hogosha," said a voice, and she pulled away so fast my head spun. In the doorway stood Ryu, looking calm yet wary as he stared Hogosha down with cool gooseberry eyes.

"Ryu," she breathed, and her face cleared of all its clouds. "Ryu, I brought her here as you commanded."

He gave her a nod as he looked at me, eyes cataloguing me from toes to teeth.

"You may go, Hogosha," he said, and her exultant, enrapture look crumpled into defeat. She slunk from the room like a whipped dog, and I felt myself grieve with her.

A small part of me still hated her, however, for leaving me alone with Ryu.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_I wrote this under the influence of the eclipse/solstice. Blame the craziness on that. Still, what are the odds that the big chapter 50 was on the night of an eclipse that happens, what, every 600 years? Is it fated that this chapter was so weird? I DON'T KNOW, MAN. I JUST DON'T KNOW. IT'S ALL THE MOON'S FAULT._

_I am a horrible, neglectful, EVIL person. Why? Because I have been unfair to the people who have drawn pictures about my stories, that's why! Seriously, I've forgotten to do shout-outs, I've forgotten to leave comments, I've forgotten to post links on my profile—I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON AND I AM SO, SO SORRY. I will make no excuses other than my extreme stupidity and forgetfulness. _

_But there is hope for me yet! I went and did a thorough listing of all the pictures drawn and posted them all on my profile, in clear groups organized by artist. If I've left you off of the list, it means I'm dumb. Like, really dumb. So send me a PM/email and yell at me and I WILL FIX IT, I SWEAR. _

_So, shoutouts to all the people who have EVER drawn art for Future Talk, in no particular order, will be right HERE:_

_Wings of Silver Rain/That Pokemon Freak__ drew two pictures! One is of Dani in her bird-form bird looking awesome, and the other shows her with many of her defining things to capture her essence (it's less cheesy than my poor description makes it sound)! WOOT!_

_Krrib__ has drawn two pictures, too! The first is a lovely portrait of Dani with music notes in the background, and the other is of Dani, underwater, in her koi form! HELL YEAH! Both require IMMEDIATE LOVE._

_Masuyo Shun, __well, what is it with people giving me two awesome pictures? She drew a picture of Dani in her Koi form, looking apprehensively over her shoulder during the Sioh incident, and it's just as awesome as her second sketch, which shows Dani leaping into the canyon during the Hunt! CHECK IT!_

_Ciffira __drew three pictures (I am spoiled rotten, I know). The first is of Dani with angel wings, with a Hiei chibi that seems appropriately devilish; the second is of Dani with an American flag (she's representin', yo!); the third shows Dani in a kimono, and they are ALL AMAZING!_

_DevilAngelWolf27__ illustrated the moment Yukina walked in on Dani's first shapeshifting attempt, then colored it not once, but twice with both traditional and digital media. SO YAY. GO LOOK AT IT. IT'S SUPER AWESOME CRAZY SPECIAL FUN._

_MistressXJade__ drew a picture of Dani with her cane! I do believe I owe her and apology, too, for not mentioning her before now, because I AM EVIL and MEAN and HORRIBLE. Anyway, I am now your slave, Mistress Jade, and a link to your pic is on my profile!_

_And now for the people who put up with me each week and make my life so fun: Itsallaboutbob, Dyani91, Kaiya's Watergarden, Crescent Venus, darksravensnight, Off-Color, Foxgirl Ray, Asking Alice, Kai-chan94, American Senpai, Dreamehz, Hitsugaya FanGirl, Koryu Elric, Wings of Silver Rain, Yukina, Masuyo Shun, chocolateluvr13, Supreme Baka, Zetsubel, Yoko Kiara14, Dude where's my spirit gun, j.d.y., Reclun, Mihakuu, BiGayStraightWhoCares, yumchaitea, rain chant, Doily Rox, AkaMizu-chan, TallyYoungBlood, DaAmazingMeepers, Angel of Randomosity, DevilAngelWolf27, Snowgirl7589, Takara Rose Oizumi, 0nfateswings, Katt Jeane, and Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer!_


	51. Chapter 51: Tea Party

Future Talk

Chapter 51:

"Tea Party"

* * *

Ryu looked tired. He wore a pair of loose jeans and no shirt, and his tanned skin seemed sallow beneath his warm demeanor. Bags like bruises marred the skin below his eyes, and he quickly sat down at the table as we traded dissimilar looks—his open and quietly delighted, mine suspicious and visibly unhappy.

"Dani," he said, smiling as his blonde hair fell into his eyes. He straddled the back of one of the chairs so he could lean his chin on his crossed arms. "It's good to see you, even if you're wearing somebody else's face."

His posture made him seem young and harmless, so I warned myself to keep on guard. "What, do you think blonde doesn't suit me, either?" I said, lacing my tone with liberal amounts of sarcasm.

My tone went right over his head, apparently. "I think it suits you very much," he protested, and then he laughed sheepishly. "Or maybe I'm biased because I'm a blonde, too?"

I did not laugh at the joke, though he dropped a chuckle of his own, and in a fit of misguided rebellion I shut my eyes, dipped into theta despite the shackles chafing at my wrists and the dull throb in my tattoo, and called up an image of my face. It flowed into me with a snap and when I opened my eyes, the hair—the hair that had escaped from my customary pigtails sometime during the wild night—hung long, soft, and definitely brown in front of my face. I rubbed my face against the inside of my upraised arms to clear it from my vision, and then I placed all of my efforts into glaring at Ryu with all of the negativity I could muster.

It didn't do me much good. His eyes lit up, he grinned, and then he clapped his hands together. "I'd been wondering what your powers would look like in the flesh!" he exclaimed, obviously interested in my abilities in a way that left no room for intimidation. "How do you manage to do that? It's cool!"

I snorted. "What, tell you everything so you can use it against me later? No thanks."

His lips twisted in apology. "I keep forgetting how much you hate me." Fingers tugged his hair back over the crown of his head. "I'm not your enemy, Dani. I don't know how many times I'll have to say it before it sinks in, but…" He smiled, but it was more like a grimace. "I am not your enemy. You have my word."

I said nothing, but I think he understood that I didn't believe him. He sighed, pursed his lips, and looked down at the floor for a second before meeting my eyes again.

"I'm sorry for the way Hogosha treated you earlier," he said, scratching the back of his neck. "I know that friends shouldn't yell at friends, but she is…protective, of me."

A memory—one brought on by thoughts of Hogosha, Ryu's awkward tone, and his continued gentle treatment of my undeserving person—made my lips purse. "Remember when we first met?" I asked.

Lilac eyes softened. "It's hard to forget."

"You told me you were in that garden because you were running from a woman," I said. I spared no time for pleasantries. "Hogosha?"

Strangely, he seemed pleased. "That's very perceptive of you, Dani. I'm surprised!" He rubbed the back of his neck again. "She can be taxing to deal with. Loyal, of course, but… well, she's kind of a nag." He laughed out loud. "Ah, but she certainly has her uses, doesn't she? She brought you in with hardly a hair out of place!"

My teeth clenched. "You're a jerk," I gritted out, and Ryu looked at me, shocked. "Are you _ignoring_ the fact that she loves you, or is your head jammed so far up your ass that you just can't see it for what it is? Because either way you've proved tonight that you're probably the biggest freaking _jerk_ I have ever had the misfortune of meeting."

Ryu's mouth worked as he recovered from my verbal assault. "I'm not… _unaware_, of her feelings," he managed, and my anger narrowed down to a sharp knife-point of hot rage.

"You're not _unaware_?" I repeated, seething. The chains above my head clanked together as my fists clenched and trembled from the strain. "You're not _unaware_? Then why, pray tell, do you insist on ignoring her, ordering her around, making her do your dirty work, and why do you flaunt how much you're obsessed with me in front of her face? If you're 'not unaware' of how she feels, then why do you insist on _torturing_ her so much?" I twisted against the chains. "You're _despicable_, the _worst_ kind of man, and you _don't_ deserve her _loyalty_!" My next words were a sharply pointed barb aimed straight for the heart. "And guess what, Ryu—after seeing the way you've treated her, I'm pretty damn certain when I say that I would never, ever, _not in a million years_, let you have me!"

I deflated a little once I got the words out, sagging against my bonds as I stared at Ryu's wide eyes. My breath ran fast in my throat.

Eventually, Ryu said: "_You're_ not _her_."

"Like hell!" I snapped. "I had a chat with Hogosha before you showed up, Ryu." I said his name with a sneer, like it was nothing but repugnant slime in my mouth. "She told me that you're not after me because of who I am, but because of _what_ I am! You don't want love or companionship, or even a cure for your loneliness!" Anger became so palpable at that point that I lunged forward, shoulders stretching painfully as I pulled against the immovable chains, but I couldn't get close enough to Ryu to gouge his eyes out like I wanted. "All you want is a _figurehead_, you bastard! All you want is some fucking _symbol_ to represent your own dual nature so you don't have to expose _yourself_! You'd put _me_ on the line, expose _me_ to criticism and prejudice, because _you're not man enough to face it on your own_!"

I had gone too far with that. "SHUT UP!" he roared, leaping to his feet. The chair fell over with a crash and he was in front of me, hand fisting in my hair as purple eyes blazed. I let out a pained, startled cry as he pulled my head back. My neck popped with a series of sharp cracks. "JUST SHUT UP!"

"Why?" I hissed, glaring at him through the pain. "Is it because you can't take hearing the truth, you coward?"

My words seemed to shock him out of whatever ferocious, animalistic state he'd succumbed to, and he pulled his hand out of my hair like I had jolted him with electricity. My head lolled forward, scalp smarting, and then I looked up to find him staring down at his hands.

"Maybe I am a coward," he said softly, still looking at his palms, "but you don't understand. You don't understand anything." His hands clenched and he shut his eyes, smiling weakly. "How _could_ you? It's not like you know me at all."

"You don't know _me_, either," I said.

"But I know that you are what Hogosha is not," he said, looking at me again. His eyes held no apology, only resolution. "I need a bridge between humans and demons, humans and _others_, at my side. Hogosha is a bridge between demons and _demons_. She is not suitable."

"And _I_ am?" I said, and laughed. "But who the hell gave you the authority to decide who's who in all this? Who died and made you king? You can't define _me_ any more than you can define _Hogosha_, and you can't just reject her feelings like they're not worthy of y—"

His eyes hardened and his mouth thinned, displeasure darkening his gaze to violet. "For all your talk of recognizing another's feeling, you seem to be forgetting that _you_ consistently reject _mine_." A cruel smile, a harsh laugh. "Hypocrisy doesn't suit you."

I growled: "Like my daddy always said, 'You shall judge a man by his enemies as well as by his friends.'"

He blinked. "What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"It means you're forgetting the reasons _why_ I can't accept your feelings," I said.

One eyebrow quirked. "Care to explain?"

"It would be an honor," I said, smiling a smile dipped in acid. "Lest you forget, you're currently in a close alliance with a man who, by your own admission, will capture, use, and _kill_ me as soon as he has the chance."

Ryu, to his credit, looked a little flustered.

"And you know what else Seishou will do?" I asked. "He'll gut my friends for being my friends, and he'll kill innocent people—people like Karla's little sister who never hurt anyone in her life—just for standing in his stupid way."

"You don't understand," Ryu said.

"Damn _right_ I don't," I replied. "I _don't_ understand why you're working with a murderous, foul , and flat-out _evil devil_. I _don't_ understand why you and Seishou have totally different objectives, so far as I know, but still cling to each other even though you don't want the same things. I _don't_ understand why you're helping him even though you say you detest his goals." I shook my head from side to side, hair flying as I squeezed my eyes shut. "How the _hell_ could I understand that, Ryu? You say you _love me_ but you're _with him_, and that doesn't add up! And it doesn't add up that you want the Book to make people psychic but Seishou wants some weird lady locked in a dungeon for reasons that are probably geared more toward world domination or some shit like that!" I gnashed my teeth, frustrated. "And what's more, you ask? Somehow I'm related to America, which just so happens to be Hogosha's birthplace, and which just so happens to be Seishou's number one interest! Coincidences like that don't happen overnight!"

"You're right," Ryu breathed. "They don't."

"So tell me," I told him. "So tell me what's really going on. Tell me the things I don't know, make it all make sense, _dammit_, because I'm confused and I'm scared and I don't _get_ you!" I struggled against the manacles again, but I only succeeded in drawing blood. It flowed in a sullen trickle down my arm, but I hardly registered the pain as I said: "Why would you work with someone like Seishou? He murdered a young girl right before my eyes, and yet you're _helping_ him? You're not like that, Ryu, you're—"

"Dani."

I stopped talking. He had whispered my name like some sort of prayer, staring at me through torn eyes all awash in unnamable emotion. I had no idea what he was thinking, and that scared me more than any threat.

"Dani," he repeated. "Before I met you, I was exactly as you described."

I didn't say a word.

"I was willing to help Seishou even though he's a killer. A monster." His gaze did not falter. "But then I met you, and I saw your compassion, your openness, your… naïveté." He chuckled. "You trusted a stranger and made me laugh, not caring about who I was or what I had in mind for you, and that charmed me. Too many times have people approached with calculated kindness, but you… you expected nothing in return."

"Get to the point," I said.

"I will," he said. "I was charmed by your innocence and lack of guile, and then, later, I realized that there was even more to you than that. You are a perfectly imperfect combination of weak, ordinary human, and strong, exceptional demon."

I laughed outright. "Me, _strong_? You've got your head in the clouds!"

"I don't mean in body," Ryu said. "I mean in heart. You're stronger willed than most humans I encounter, willing to go the distance for what you believe in." A smile broke through the clouds. "When I saw that drive, one which matched my own, I knew I had to make you mine."

"Hate to break it to you, but you're wrong. Most call me irrationally stubborn, not willing to go the distance," I said, not liking his too-perfect, overly-idealized description of me one bit. "I'm stupid and pig-headed and weak and mean and bitchy and inconsiderate, Ryu. Why can't you see that?"

But Ryu only shook his head. "Perhaps you are, but that matters little to me."

"Maybe it should."

"That's my business." He took a deep breath. "But then, after meeting you… that's when I started to see Seishou for what he really is."

"A psychopath?"

"More or less." Another deep breath. "I have weighed my options, Dani, and I have found that there is no way for me to keep my alliance with Seishou intact, and to keep _you_, as well. Thus, I am on the precipice of a choice that will affect the rest of my life, for better or for worse."

"Me or Seishou, huh?" I asked.

"Precisely."

I licked my lips, thinking hard before I chose to very carefully say: "And would you mind terribly explaining what both choices would mean for you, me, and the worlds, in the long run?"

A measuring look made me tense up; what was Ryu planning? But then his eyes fell; he looked at the floor, visibly unsure of how to proceed.

"Please?" I ventured, and his trepidation cracked.

"To understand the choices I will make tonight," he said slowly, still not looking at my face, "you will have to understand me, as a man, and the events that shaped who I have become. Otherwise, everything I say will ring hollow and flat."

I rattled the chains like Jacob Marley's ghost. "I'm not going anywhere," I said.

He said: "Very well," and then he began his story. "My father married my mother through an arranged marriage. He had no idea what she was until after the ceremony, but by then it was too late."

"What she was?" I asked.

"A psychic," Ryu said. "One who could carve doors in space and go anywhere at will. She taught me the beginning of her craft, in secret, before my father found us out and banished her to a far-off estate. He hated her ability—it made him feel inferior, and threatened, and when he saw that I took after my mother… he could not stand the sight of me."

I couldn't help but feel a twang of pity for the man at that, but I pushed the feelings aside as I tried to pay attention.

"I was only eight years old at the time," he said. "Father sent me to boarding school in a far off country where he wouldn't have to look at me, telling me that if I used my powers I would be killed by the people watching me, and I spent two miserable years away from comfort and love." His eyes held a look of far-off, long suppressed pain. "Word that my mother had killed herself reached me when I was ten, almost two years after I was sent away."

I gasped; I couldn't help it. Ryu heard me and tried to smile. He failed.

"I was angry, of course, and the child in me thought I could strike out on my own. So I used my mother's long-forgotten teachings and tried to create a rift to another place, another city where I could start life anew." He looked up at the ceiling with a wistful smile. "Of course, it did not go that way at all. I had no idea how to handle the powers I possessed, and my emotions of hurt, betrayal, and fear made my abilities run wild. The door I opened led me to a place unlike any other I had ever been, a world I had no idea existed and one that was more fascinating than any I could have dreamed up on my own."

"Demon World?" I guessed.

Ryu nodded. "Demon World."

"Hogosha found me wandering in the forest, alone and lost and scared—but eager, and innocent, and interested. She took me in after I told her about the loneliness I had endured, promising to be my new mother and friend who would accept me no matter who, or what, I was."

"Birds of a feather," I said.

"Of course." He moved to sit down, righting the fallen chair with a momentarily regretful look. "I spent ten years in her care, living with Hogosha as an outcast. But despite being cut off from our own kinds, we were not lonely. We had each other."

"I suppose," he mused, "that I think of her as my mother. Maybe that's why I have such trouble thinking of her as a potential lover."

A pang of startling recognition made me think of Koenma. There was love between us, I knew that to be true, but it was a pure love, one that didn't have the more sinful flavor of romance, just… kinship.

Ryu and Hogosha, Koenma and I… were we more alike than ever?

Oblivious to my inner workings, Ryu said: "When I was twenty years old, Seishou appeared."

I froze solid.

"He spun a rather odd story," Ryu said. "He—"

"But, but Seishou is the Dark One!" I protested, cutting Ryu off completely. "How did you not recognize him after living with the Sisters for so long?"

Ryu merely laughed. "Seishou is an ancient demon, Dani. Do you really think he's spent every moment of his waking life plaguing the likes of _these_ people? No, he has forayed far from here, and all during my ten years with Hogosha he remained aloof."

"Still," I said, "Hogosha—"

"She _hates_ her people as much as she longs to be one of them," Ryu said, brow knitting at the paradox. "She was as alarmed at his appearance as I was—which is to say, not much."

"But—"

"But nothing, Dani," Ryu said, voice harsh. "The fact remains that Seishou approached me, and not because he wanted to hurt Hogosha and I."

"Then why—"

"It was because he _knew_ _me_, Dani," Ryu said. "He knew me, knew who I was, knew who my father was, and do you know why?"

I thought about it, feeling the pieces slowly some together, and then I ventured: "The Society?"

Ryu smiled. "Indeed. Seishou, while travelling in Human World, met my father only a few months after my disappearance." His smile faded. "Perhaps if I had met Seishou sooner, things would be different." He grimaced. "But what's done is done. Seishou met my father, who, unbeknownst to me, was obsessively grieving my disappearance. When no human could track me down, he turned to the one people who he thought might be able to help."

I breathed: "Psychics."

"Yes." Ryu's eyes were as hard as chips of quartz. "My father only realized his love for me when he lost me, and when I vanished he recruited many psychics to the cause of finding me. Ashamed of his prejudice, he began to look for ways to bring out psychic powers in normal humans, so he could search for me himself."

"And you thought he hated you, your whole life," I said. "Fate's sure been a bitch to you, Ryu."

He snorted. "You're telling me. Anyway, Seishou was intrigued by my father's plans, and he was my father's right hand man… up until my father's death."

"Death…" I trailed off, not knowing what to say, but Ryu kept on talking.

"My father entrusted the Society to Seishou when he died," Ryu said, "and Seishou took the lead with the finesse of a natural leader. But no one can be totally dedicated to a single cause for years on end, and Seishou returned to the Sisters when he became somewhat bored of running the Society."

"And that's when he met you," I said.

"Yes," said Ryu. "He was not expecting to see me, the son of his predecessor, but he recognized me even though I had grown up. In me, he saw exactly what he had always been looking for. With my intimate connection to the Sisters through Hogosha, I could very easily infiltrate the sanctuary of the Bright Ones and help him achieve his goals."

"But why would you do that if you were happy with the Sisters?" I asked.

Ryu sighed. "He played me very well, I'm afraid, but I was younger then, and eager. He painted a picture of the Society finding peace and tolerance between psychics and humans, and even demons like Hogosha farther down the line. I grew so enmeshed in this idea that I would have done anything, _anything_ at all, to become a part of the Society." He let out a bitter laugh. "He baited me by saying that there was no way a young upstart like me could ever hope to get into the Society, even if I was my father's son. Then, however, he got the idea that if he used his influence to ease me into the role of leader, I could one day assume my father's position and further the goals I so desperately desired."

"Let me guess," I said. "He offered a trade or something—your help getting the Bright Lady in exchange for his influence in the Society?"

"An astute observation, Dani," Ryu remarked. "From there, he informed me of the Society's plans to steal the Book from Spirit World, and I knew that my powers were suited—no, fated—for the task." His eyes lit up, happy and shining and fervent. "It was fate all along, you see—had Father not driven me from him I would never have made it here, Father would never had made the Society, and equality could never be reached. My suffering was my destiny, and it was for the good of all the Worlds!"

_Somebody has a messiah complex_, I thought, but I didn't want Ryu to turn his ecstatic face my way, so I said nothing.

"And now you see what I risk, here," Ryu said. He stood up and began to pace around the small room, hands waving as he spoke in an increasingly loud voice. "To choose Seishou is to risk my goals, my _life_, for his wishes, for what if his intentions for the Bright Lady conflict with my own? He has shown decreasing concern for the Society in recent months and I fear he has used up his uses for us after finding me as an ally. Perhaps the only reason he wanted the Book in the first place was to use it to get to the Bright Lady; who is to say that his intentions have ever been pure?"

He turned to me, then, and strode forward to grab me by the shoulders. His smile reminded me of a doll's, frozen in hollow emotion and fragile beauty.

"You, though, you're _pure_," he said in a desperate whisper. "To lose Seishou is to lose his influence on the Society, but what will that matter with you, the bridge between all races, standing at my side? That's influence enough, with or without Seishou there!" I saw his ideas solidify in the hardening of his lips and jaw. "You're the answer. You'll give what Seishou can't."

"But you can't trust me!" I protested, squirming to get away from him, but he held on tight. "Dammit, Ryu, _I don't want to help you_! I don't believe in your goals or—"

But he wasn't hearing me, not when he was gripped so tight by his overpowering ideals. "Join me, Dani," he said, eyes ablaze as his hands cruelly grabbed my arms and squeezed. "Join me, please!"

"No!" I shouted, and then: "You're _hurting_ me, Ryu, this isn't _right_, you can't just force me to—"

He wasn't listening, of course, when he bent down and tried to kiss me, eyes wide open and boring into mine like they could force me to submit to his efforts like some sort of doll or mannequin, but I pulled back and screamed and kicked and cried and when he shoved his tongue into my mouth I bit down, _hard_, and he pulled back with a curse. I was breathing like a freight train when he spat blood onto the ground and glared, but I just glared right back and said: "Get the _hell_ away from me, you rapist! Get it through your head—_I won't join you_!"

Eyes narrowed; fists clenched; shoulders hunched; head inclined so he could look down at me like a king looking at a misbehaving servant.

"I didn't want it to have to come to this," he said, "but I can see that your demonic nature calls for such drastic measures."

"What measures?" I spat, tasting his blood on my tongue. Pounding, screaming, agonizing adrenaline made me shake, shiver, twist; fear, for a moment, was replaced by anger. "Are you going to bring whips and chains into your little tea party or something? Because I am _not_ into that and I most certainly am _not_ into _you_!"

"Hogosha told me about this," he said, and he walked to my right before circling around behind me. Eyes traveled up and down my body, scrutinizing me from tip to toe. "About how demonesses will only submit to a dominant male. And if that is what it will take to win you, then I will play that role with pleasure."

My stomach lurched when he said that because I didn't like the sound of it and _what the hell was he talking about? _I twisted around to face him, chain links squealing as they spun in on themselves, but Ryu grabbed my arms with a furious look and spun me back around, jerking me back so my back pressed up against his ribs and sternum.

Arms wrapped around my hips and pulled me off my feet so Ryu's head was on level with my neck, but I kicked and managed to connect with something soft, and he dropped me with a grunt of pain. I fell and hit my foot on the floor, sagging in my chains as my leg turned to fire. My tattoo burned, too, a mirror of my smoldering anger, and I assumed that the tattoo was merely burning because my shoulders had been in such a stretched position for so long—

I was too absorbed in my foot and my tattoo to notice Ryu limping past me. He stood before me, and when I looked up into his furious violet eyes he struck me across the face, fist closed. The blow connected with my cheek and temple, and stars danced in my vision as I hung there, limp, and tried not to throw up from a combination of mind-numbing fear, anger, and pain.

"Cooperate and I won't have to do that again," he said, though I barely heard him, and then I saw his boots disappear behind me. Something tugged at the side of my neck, cool air rushing beneath the bandages as Ryu pushed a portion of them away from a spot on my throat. Arms went around my hips again, lifting me, and his head squeezed between my neck and my upraised arm, and I felt the heat of his breath on my exposed skin at the juncture where neck and shoulder curved together—

He sank his teeth in.

Slowly.

And it hurt.

Badly.

The pain quickly cut through my haze. I struggled anew, back burning even hotter as pain and rage made my vision tunnel, and I bellowed "LET ME GO, YOU BASTARD, I SWEAR I'LL KILL YOU IF—" but the burn in the tattoo was rising, _rising_, reaching a boiling point—

_Something_ as malleable as a liquid but as solid as ice pushed into the place where Ryu's teeth broke into my shoulder, forcing its way inside in a glacier-cold wave of invasive, disgusting, and loathsome power. It spread from the bite in my neck, bleeding into my shoulder and chest before spilling over onto my back. My struggles couldn't stop its spread, and I went limp as a sob broke in my throat. What he did to me was a violation of the highest order, forcing his very essence into my body without an ounce of care or delicacy—

That's when the cold met my tattoo.

Have you ever thrown icewater onto a hot frying pan? The water sizzles and spits before vaporizing into hot steam, and when Ryu's cold invasion hit my on-fire tattoo the power roiled and writhed and hissed before bursting up and out of my tattooed skin. I felt it shoot out of my pores like bullets, and when more cold hit the tattoo a millisecond later it backtracked _up_ and _out_ of the bite wound like a rogue bottle rocket.

Ryu threw me off of him with a screech; the force of his push nearly tore my shoulders out of socket when they met the resistance of the chain, and I think I screamed. Still, I was aware enough to see Ryu fall to his knees in front of me, bare chest alight with a massive, bloody burn and mouth dripping hot, red blood.

"Hogosha!" he cried, though his diction was slurred. "HOGOSHA!"

The demon burst into the room, took one look at the pair of us, and grabbed Ryu up into her arms. She took him out of the room at a run, and I felt a terrified sob rise up when she came back in, eyes blazing as she strode over to me and raised her hand to strike.

I screamed a little, then, but her hands merely gripped the chains just above my wrists and broke them into shards and dust. I collapsed on the floor since I had no support, but Hogosha jerked me upright by the elbow and thrust something into my hand.

I knew before opening my eyes that I held my staff. Warmth and comfort flowed into me in a burst, and I used the staff to stand as I rubbed my cheek along its silky surface and let a slew of relieved tears slide free.

The tattoo on my back stopped burning and merely glowed with dusky consolation.

"Leave, now," I heard Hogosha say, and I opened my eyes to find her in tears herself. Her English words were soft. "I heard what you said about me; I heard it all. Seishou is on his way now, but even though you reject my Ryu, I know he would mourn you if Seishou had his way." She turned away, still crying. "Seishou and his talk of the machine, and of the Bright Ones as the keys to its operation… Ryu does not know what Seishou plans for them, he does not truly know what Seishou plans for _you_. Forgive him for that."

"M, machine?" I stammered, because what was she talking about, could she really keep Ryu from helping Seishou, what—

But Hogosha did not hear. "Ryu only knows that the machine and the Bright Ones matter little to him, and that helping Seishou is merely an inevitable stepping stone to his own goals," she said, and she strode to the door. "Go, now. I will hold Seishou back so you may flee, my Sister."

And so, dazed and scared and violated, I left her.

I stumbled into the night.

I did not look back.

* * *

I wasn't sure where I was as I, still crying, tugged my bandages over the bleeding wound on my throat and tried not to collapse onto the cobblestone street. The houses of the Sister's city loomed high above me, foreboding and grey and shadowed in the dark of the Demon World night. I didn't recognize any of them or know where to go, so I just used my staff to get as far away from Ryu's lair as I could. Memories of Hogosha saying that Seishou was on his way echoing through my head, driving me forward despite how badly I longed to just curl up into a ball and sleep, and I slipped and slid because it was humid and the stones reflected wetly like mirrors in the dark. Breath hissed in and out of my chest as I strode relentlessly ahead, each step sending a shock up my leg, and I had to stop for breath.

A figure, a figure wearing a metal mask that glinted with a frozen smile, stepped out of the darkness ahead.

I went paralytic, eyes filling up again because _it was Seishou, not him, anything but him after what just happened_, and as I started to voice a helpless scream the figure bounded forward. A hand came up and cupped my mouth before I could get the shriek out; another went tight around my waist and dragged me forward, and then the figure was carrying me away with my feet dangling off the ground.

I relaxed in those arms on reflex, wrapping my own around his shoulders as I pressed my face into his hair.

I knew the minute he touched me, without really knowing how, that this was Hiei.

* * *

We ran. For how long, I don't know. I was too busy clinging to my safe haven to notice the turns we took, and then Hiei stopped, pried my arms off of him, set me on my feet, and held me at arm's length.

"Why is your face back to normal?" he demanded, eyes sparking through the mask's eyeholes. It was hard to look at him when he seemed so much like Seishou, and when I averted my eyes in irrational fear he gave my shoulders a light shake. "Woman, answer me—did anyone see you?"

I did not reply: I threw my arms around Hiei's neck instead. My face pressed into his throat as I clung to him, trying not to cry from sheer relief as I felt his familiar heat wrap me up and hold me.

My half-sobbed words—"I'm so happy to _see you_!"—did not cover a tenth of the emotion packed behind them.

He stiffened, but then his arms jerked up and caught me around the chest, squeezing tight just below the tattoo's lowest lines. The edge of his mask grazed my temple roughly, but I didn't care as I squeezed him tighter, drowning out the memories of Ryu's cold invasion with the sensation of Hiei's presence: the heat of him, the solidity of his body, his scent, his strong arms, the way my tattoo had begun to tingle and purr and glitter against my skin…

The moment only lasted until Hiei said: "Were you seen?"

I pushed away, but Hiei's hands stayed spread on my back and I didn't get far. "Ryu, and Hogosha," I stammered, and I lifted my shaking hands and reached toward Hiei's face. "Hiei—!"

"What?" he asked, "What is it, Dani?", not getting what I wanted at all until I finally managed to grab at the mask with numb fingers.

"Mask," I hissed, "mask, take it _off_," and his hand joined mine and we pushed the mask off of him together, revealing his anticipating face and wide-open eyes dyed black in the dark, and I put my hands on his cheeks and stared at him, feeling my eyes well with tears because he was just so _right_, so _familiar_, and then his eyes flickered to my mouth and his hands tightened as we both came to the same conclusion, eyes meeting in sharp, sweet, shared surprise before—

I don't know who leaned forward first, him or me or both at the same time, but we kissed each other and that was that. No more waiting, no more hesitation, no more overanalyzing or hedging or claiming this wasn't real, this wasn't happening, _I don't feel anything for you_, because it was obvious in the way my hands fisted in his shirt and in the way he wrapped me in an embrace so tight I thought my ribs would crack that something was _there_, something as palpable as his firm lips and my racing breath; it was in my blazing tattoo and the strange sound halfway between a sob and a plea that echoed in my throat, and it was in his low growl that said _mine_, _finally_, and _yes_.

The kiss only lasted for a minute, a simple press of mouth to mouth that didn't exchange anything more potent—though potent it most certainly was—but searing heat and pointed intention and something _else_ I couldn't name, and then we broke apart completely and stared like we'd never truly _seen_ each other before in our lives. His mouth looked perfect; his eyes looked wild; he seemed ready to take me back at any moment and finish what we started, for better or for worse, consequences be damned and—

Suddenly I thought Hiei had left me alone in the dark, but then I realized that my eyes had just fallen shut. I opened them. Hiei stood a foot away, hands still out like we were still locked together, and then I said: "Oh, I'm—sorry."

It wasn't the best thing to say, I think. Hiei's hands dropped and disappeared into his pockets as he looked at me, breathing deeply through his nose with eyes that I couldn't read. Everything about him seemed to burn, most of all the air around us as it shivered against my skin.

Still my tattoo throbbed.

"I was just so glad to _see_ _you_," I stammered, body aflame as I tried not to let my trembling knees give out on me.

He scowled. "Would you have been as glad to see Kuwabara?" Hiei asked flatly.

I suppose I looked horrified at the suggestion, because his eyes closed and he smirked.

"Then you have nothing to be sorry for," he said, and he opened his eyes. He seemed… amused. Maybe elated. And maybe just a little—just the _smallest_ bit—afraid when he casually suggested: "We can pretend that it never happened… if you wish."

I gaped at him. How could we _ever_…? But that had been so…

How could I ever _forget_ that?

His jaw twitched. "I thought as much," he muttered, taking my silence in a way I did not intend, and he walked past with without a word.

"Hiei!" I said, turning after him, and he stopped. I could barely make out his shape in the dark, but I could still feel him like he was beside me...

…could still feel his heat on my lips, back, chest, _everywhere_, and not just where he'd touched.

"Hiei, it _happened_!" I said, the words bursting out before I could check them. "It _happened_, and—"

He turned to me, but he did not move closer. His features remained bland, calm… but tense.

Like he was waiting for me to take it all back.

"It… it happened," I said more softly. I couldn't think of what else to say, so I repeated yet again: "It happened."

This time he smirked, smugness overriding his fearful poker face.

"So it did," he said. He very, very slowly licked his lips, and he held my eyes when he did it. Whether or not he realized he was doing it was a moot point because I was on fire. "So it did."

The sense that everything was different—and yet familiar, and welcome—lingered long after the moment passed.

* * *

We did not, for those of you who want to know, kiss each other again that night. There were no sappy declarations of love, or promises of protection, or anything like that. We were both content, I think, to simply sit back and absorb everything our desperate kiss meant, like dusty ground basking in a light, warm rain. Hiei just picked me up without a word when it was through, letting me recline in his arms and twine my hands around his neck, and he sprinted into the night. My eyes closed on reflex. While he took us to wherever it was he was supposed to go, he brushed the glitter of his mind against mine until I let him in.

He didn't waste time in getting to the heart of the matter. _We chased Seishou into the city square, where the Sisters had him cornered, _he thought to me. _They were grateful for the backup even if they hate men, and while we distracted Seishou they managed to get most of the other Sisters out of that sunken building and into a safe place in the city. I saw it in their minds._

I tried to talk right as Hiei made a massive jump, and I bit my tongue.

_Keep it in your head, idiot,_ he admonished. _We were fighting and we almost had Seishou pinned down when _she_ came running into the middle of the fight._

Rather than ask who he meant, I just squeezed him a little tighter. He understood what I wanted and gave it to me.

_The healer,_ he told me, flashing an image of Karla's face in my head. _The one you like. She came running in, saying things about Elaina, about _you_, and Hogosha. I connected with her and saw memories of Hogosha knocking her out, and then the healer woke up just in time to see you vanish. I told the others and I went after you alone. You managed to escape before I got there._

_But how did you find me?_ I thought.

_I know your energy,_ he said. _It wasn't hard to trace._

Something in his tone suggested more than what he'd said, but I let it go. There wasn't time. _And what happens now?_

His fingers dug into my thigh and upper arm. If _they're still fighting Seishou, we join in,_ Hiei said. _If they're not, we go back to the sunken building and regroup._

_They won't be fighting Seishou,_ I told him. When he sent a vague questioning feeling at me, I said:_ Hogosha told me that he was coming right before I left, and to run._

_Then we'll go back to the Hall,_ he said. His legs worked faster. _Hang on._

I wanted to say something else to fill the silence that came after that, but I hesitated for a moment. Hiei, sensing my unease, urged me on and I finally added: _That's why I was freaked out when you… showed up._ I felt my real-world cheeks color. _It's why I hated seeing you in that mask. I was scared out of my mind that Seishou would catch me._

_I could tell,_ Hiei said, and I felt smugness color his mind. _You calmed down when I touched you, you know._

Good-natured irritation (mixed with embarrassment) prompted me to say:_ Now you're just being obnoxious. _

_Says you,_ he told me, and I saw an image—an image of me through his eyes, standing rumpled, wide-eyed, defenseless, and trembling in the middle of the street as he approached, and then I relived the way I'd seemed to melt into him when he—

_Hiei, don't,_ I said, injecting force into my tone. _We can talk about this when getting distracted by each other isn't so… so hazardous!_

It took him a minute, but then he grudgingly said: _Fair enough._

* * *

We made it back in record time, but the Hall's outside doors were tightly closed.

"Hmph," he growled when he put me down outside of them. "If this isn't enough of a guard against Seishou, nothing is." He paused, sizing the doors up. Then he said: "We can open them when the others get here."

It had taken ten Sisters working together to open them the first time, I recalled, and I looked around us very carefully. "Do you think we should get out of the open?" I asked, and Hiei nodded before scooping me up again. Before I knew it he had jumped, practically flying into the branches of one of the massive trees, and he sat down on the massive bough without setting me aside. Arms draped loose around my waist.

I didn't want to be too close to him right then, though, because I had calmed down and for some reason touch didn't feel right, and I scrambled out of his lap and sat on my own, peering over the edge of the limb (which was at least as big around as a barrel) to stare at the ground a hundred feet below.

"Did you really have to pick one up so high?" I asked, swallowing, and when I looked up I found Hiei staring at me, leaning against the tree's trunk with a smirk.

"After all you've been though, you're still afraid of heights?" he asked. With a jolt I realized that he was, in his own harsh way, attempting to tease me a little, and I forced a smile.

"Sort of," I said. I looked around us, catching sight of the Hall through small gaps in the leaves. "Where are Yusuke and the others, do you think?"

Hiei closed his eyes, then opened them. "They're on their way," he said. "About five minutes now."

"Oh."

We sat in easy silence for a minute, each lost in our own thoughts. My tattoo had stopped screaming at me, settling instead for a dull moan of warmth, but there was a small spot of cold beneath my breastbone I hadn't been aware of before then.

"What happened, Dani?"

I knew he was serious since he used my name, but I didn't look at Hiei when I said: "I don't know what you mean."

I heard him snort. "Don't give me that. I've never seen you so shaken before."

My lips quirked. "Not even after the Sioh incident?"

"That was survival instinct, not emotional response," he said. "This is shock, fear… disgust."

To my immense horror, my stomach churned in response and the thought of Ryu's horrible attack resurfaced in full force. I put a hand over my mouth, trying not to gag when I thought of the way he—

A hot hand closed over mine, pulling it away from my mouth as another, hotter hand pressed against my cheek. That hand moved my face until I was staring straight at Hiei. He looked about ready to kill something.

"Your face is bruised," he said quietly.

"It's too dark to see that," I said. I could hardly see Hiei's eyes in the gloom, but I remembered Ryu's punch as plain as day.

"I don't need to see. I can feel the heat of your blood beneath the skin." A pause, with Hiei looking thoughtful on the other end of it. Then, in a very calm voice, he asked: "Can I kill him?"

My smile was weak, but genuine. "Careful, Hiei. I might take you up on that offer."

"I'd welcome it," he said. The hand on mine tightened. "He hurt you. Don't lie to me. How?"

The bite on my neck stung a little, but I just nuzzled my nose into Hiei's worn palm before looking back up at him. He was staring at the place where his hand met my cheek, lips thinned into a hard line, and then he met my eyes. His mouth softened somewhat, but his eyes did not lose their murderous edge.

"Talking about it right now won't help us steal the Bright Lady," I said. "I need to focus. So can we talk about it later?"

He saw that I was serious, and he did not argue. He knew I would come to him in time.

I only hoped that, when I did, Hiei wouldn't judge me for it.

In the face of our most recent… development, I wasn't sure if I knew how to predict the way his moods would swing.

Or, for that matter, how Hiei could predict my own.

* * *

The others arrived not long after, dashing up to the Hall's doors in a quiet, but intent, wave. Hiei sensed them before I even knew they were there; in fact, the only way I figured it out was because Hiei pulled me into his arms before jumping down to the ground. I kept my eyes shut for the whole thing, and I only realized we weren't alone when I heard voices.

"Dani!" I heard Kuwabara say once I had solid ground beneath me. "You have your face back!" He strode up to me and clapped a hand on my shoulder, but his expression was hard to see in the night. "I missed it!"

"It might be wise to wear the other one while we're inside, however good it is to see you back in your own skin," Kurama remarked, and I nodded before calling up Mom's face once more. Once I had gone back to being a fabulous blonde goddess (sarcasm of the highest order, here) I looked the boys up and down. None of them looked too banged up, though a large scrape on Yusuke's cheek and a sagging tear in Kuwabara's jacket sleeve had me worried.

"None of you are hurt?" I asked, and the group basically shrugged me off.

"It was hard to even get close to Seishou with the Sisters crowdin' 'im all the time," Yusuke griped.

"What happened after I left?" Hiei asked. He had moved a few feet away from me, not flaunting what had happened between us through unnecessary touch, and for that I was grateful. I didn't think I could stand much teasing from Yusuke at that point.

"Nothing noteworthy, I'm afraid," Kurama said, face growing somber when he thought about it. "He summoned several of his shadow creatures to distract the fighters, then fled. It happened not long after you left to look for Dani, actually."

"But we couldn't come back here right away because those dogs were all over the place, and we helped clean them up," Kuwabara said proudly. "I got five!"

Yusuke laughed at him. "Yeah, and I got eight; whaddaya think of that?"

As they bickered over who had the highest kill-count, Kurama said: "It took some maneuvering to sneak away, but we managed. And how did the two of you fare?"

I stuck to a short version of events. "Hogosha knocked out my guard and took me to Ryu," I said. "He told me a lot about how he and Seishou met and stuff, but other than him trying to get me to join him, there's not much to report."

"You'll have to tell us what you learned later, but for now there is no time," Kurama said, and he paused. "But, may I ask how you got away?" He looked to Hiei. "I assume you had a hand in that?"

Hiei tossed his head. "Dani did that on her own, actually. I found her wandering in the streets."

_Is it just me, _I thought, trying to decipher Hiei's shadowed face, _or does he seem kind of… proud of me_? Indeed, Hiei's bright eyes didn't look nearly as pretentious as they usually did…

"And how did you mange that, Dani?" Kurama asked, looking impressed, and I promptly froze.

"Uh," I said, because I didn't want to tell the truth but I hadn't thought to prepare a story, "uh, well, Ryu got a little too close and I…" I laughed, blushing a bit. "I might have aimed below the belt, you know?"

Yusuke and Kuwabara—who had finished beating each other up and wandered over to listen—gave me looks of revulsion (Kuwabara) and pride (Yusuke).

"Way to go, blondie!" the ex-detective chortled, ruffling my hair. "Teach that bastard who's boss!"

"Why do people keep doing that to me?" I snapped, waving his hands out of my hair, but he only laughed.

"It's because you're a kid," he said, and he started toward the Hall's doors. "Let's get going, guys. Operation 'Steal Bright Bitch' is underway!"

* * *

Muscles enhanced with Spirit Energy (and probably some of Hiei's telekinesis, if his glowing forehead mean anything) made short work of the Hall's doors, and after we went inside and the doors swing shut behind us, darkness as complete as death broke over us.

I didn't like it, not one bit, so I dove into theta for an escape and started singing the firesong. I pulled it into the world and opened my eyes, happily surprised to find that the fire had wrapped itself around the sphere on the top of my staff. The bright plume of flame cast enough flickering light to cast a twenty foot circle of illumination, and I smiled at the boys before saying: "So who knows the way?"

Everyone looked at Kurama, who sighed and snapped his fingers. There immediately came a dull blue-green flash from my right, and I spun, frightened, before realizing that a patch of moss on the floor had started to glow.

"I marked the way there with phosphorescent algae," he explained, and he turned to follow the trail. "Follow me, everyone."

The five of us walked along in silence for a time, with Yusuke and Kuwabara bringing up and the rear and Hiei and Kurama in front. I walked in the middle since I had the light, marveling at the strange network of tunnels and wall. Some parts of the intricate maze appeared to be newer and made of stone, while other parts of it seemed old and were probably original parts of the building.

Eventually Kuwabara asked: "You're sure there's no one in the place, Hiei?"

Hiei snorted, glancing at Kuwabara over his shoulder. "I told you, they evacuated it and shut the doors to keep Seishou out. The Sisters are safer in the city."

We had come upon the feast hall at that point, and we crossed it in silence before Kurama said: "Dani, I believe this is where you lead."

"Uh," I said, peering into the shadows, and then I pointed. "We walked straight in that direction for a little bit, and then there's a big crack in the wall. From there it's a straight shot to the Bright Ones' door thing." I let my point drop. "We might have to walk until we hit the wall then look for the crack a bit; I've never walked there on my own so it might be hard to find."

It was not, actually too hard to find at all, but not for reasons I anticipated. Kuwabara strode past me before I could even gesture for the boys to follow and walked right into the dark without a flinch, vanishing briefly before we heard him, a few meters to our left, yell: "Hey guys, it's over here!"

We trotted—and limped—after him, only to find him standing in the crack's mouth. He was grinning from ear to ear when he said: "You guys sure look surprised!"

"But… but how did you find it so fast?" I asked, totally flabbergasted.

Kuwabara shrugged, and then he turned to Hiei. "Are you _sure_ everybody evacuated, Hiei?" he asked, suspicion coloring his voice like crayons.

"Yes I'm sure," Hiei snapped. "I read it in the Rider's minds, and they were in charge of the whole thing."

Kurama, however, said: "Out of curiosity, Kuwabara, why do you ask?"

The human psychic shrugged. "It's just that I keep getting ghost-flashes of energy up ahead, that's all. I followed them and they led me here. It wasn't hard."

Hiei looked pissed; Kurama looked wary. Yusuke, contrary to them both, looked excited.

"So I might get a punch in, after all!" he said, bounding into the crack despite the darkness. His voice echoed in on itself a hundred times when he yodeled: "FOLLOW ME!"

Kuwabara did so with a shout. Kurama put a hand over his eyes. "Brilliant, Yusuke," he muttered. "Just brilliant." Then he looked to me and said: "What can we expect on the other side?"

"A big room and a big pair of doors," I said. I walked past him. "That's about it. Let's roll."

And so we rolled, into the crevice for many silent minutes broken only by footsteps and Yusuke's and Kuwabara's bickering from up ahead. It didn't take that long to reach the large room with the riveted support beams, and as we crossed its immense dimensions I heard Kurama remark: "The architecture here is atypical of Demon World. How does it compare to America, Dani?"

"It's similar," I admitted. "Riveted steel I-beams were all the rage in big buildings."

"I thought as much," he said, and then we found ourselves standing before the doors—well, the Doors. These deserve a capital 'd'.

"What the heck do you make of these?" Yusuke was saying as he stood a mere inch or two away from the Doors, leaning in close with a hand on his chin. He looked sick in their pale green light.

Kuwabara, beside him, had adopted a similar posture. The effect was comic; I half expected him to call Yusuke 'Sherlock'. "Hey, there aren't any handles!" he said. "How do you get them open?"

"Step aside," Hiei said, walking forward. Yusuke and Kuwabara cleared out of the way as Hiei placed his hand flat on the Door, concentrating…

His arm jerked back with a snap.

"It shocked me," he dead-panned, staring at his palm. He held the flesh up for Kurama to see; it was bright red. "Not badly, but if I pushed harder I get the feeling it would get less… friendly." He stepped back and stared up at the Doors through narrowed eyes, and then his eyes fell shut and his forehead started to glow.

"Anything?" Kurama asked after a moment or two.

A frown deepened the lines around Hiei's mouth. "Something is keeping it closed," he said, eyes opening. "I don't know what."

I swallowed, remembering the Grand Mother's attempt to open the Door with the blonde hairs from her bracelet—hairs that could not have come from a Sister. "Um, guys?"

When I had all of their attentions, I took a deep breath.

"I… I think I know what to do," I said.

"Care to enlighten the rest of us?" Kurama said silkily, and I ran my fingers through my hair.

"Well," I said, "the Grand Mother kept hinting that I'm… that I was someone who… well…" I grimaced. "She implied a lot of things, but I get the feeling that if my plan works, it'll prove at least one of them once and for all."

"Then go for it, Dani," Yusuke said, and I smiled.

"I will," I said, and I pulled my hand out of my hair. A few strands clung to my fingers, and I carefully selected the longest one and pinched it between my forefinger and thumb before walking toward the Doors. Hiei stepped aside but stayed close as I held out my hand, hair dangling brightly through the air.

"Do you really want to do this?" he murmured, so low that I doubted anyone else heard.

I took a deep breath, heart hammering in my mouth all of a sudden, and I offered him a weak smile.

"I have to know what I am," I said softly, and the hair touched the Door.

Imagine, if you will, that the Door's pitted, flawed, and pockmarked surface went utterly smooth in an instant. Then imagine that the green-tinged metal gleamed like water and sucked forward, pulling the hair into it and out of my hand like a child slurping a spaghetti noodle. The entire thing rippled a few times as I stepped back to look, mouth dry in disbelief as the Door trembled like jello mixed with quicksilver, and then it surged liquidly upward and pulled into the walls and out of sight.

From the room within there came a faint blue glow.

"And _what_ exactly does this prove, do ya think?" Kuwabara muttered, but I didn't hear him because movement in the dim blue darkness had stopped my heart.

It started again, though, when the Grand Mother revealed herself, and smiled.

"I have been waiting for you, Danielle," she said, and she held the gas mask out to me. "I knew you'd come."

I walked forward like I was in a dream, not really feeling anything other than a hollow roar in my ears and the sensation of my sneaker striking the now-metal floor. The metal vibrated a little under my feet, and I wondered at this. I took the mask in my free hand and stared into the Grand Mother's face, searching for answers I didn't have but she most likely did.

But she wasn't interested in reconciling my doubts just then. She turned, black cloak swirling about her figure, and then her hunched back moved away. I followed, dazed, and barely heard the boys whispering behind me as they came, too.

I dimly remember saying "Just follow me, OK?" over my shoulder at them, but I don't think I was over the shock of it all yet. Around us stretched a room smaller than the one we had just left, but one that my torch still did little to illuminate. I could not see the source of the blue glow, but as I followed the Grand Mother the light grew progressively stronger. I doused my illusion of fire not long later, because it had been conflicting with the blue and making it hard to see, and when I did I realized that the room was far from empty.

Around us, like a graveyard of shattered eggs, lay the fabled chrysalises.

They were about nine feet tall each and oval in shape. The back of each one had been made of curved metal, and glass doors that completed the egg-shape stood open on most of the pods. Some of the doors were shattered; some of the metal halves were crushed like paper cups. None looked to be in good repair, most having fallen forward or backward or to the side, but the ones that were still standing looked regal, alien, and strange. They had been arranged into rows at one point, but little organization still remained because bits of the roof had caved in, crushing several pods and denting several others.

The rows of them stretched far off into the dark. If I had to guess, there must have been a hundred or so pods, at least.

The Grand Mother walked down an aisle that cut between the rows of chrysalises, a row clear of debris and worn smooth by many passing feet, and as we traveled down it the blue grew bright, so bright. The source of it—a pod that still stood whole and unbroken, a pod that was bigger than the others and raised upon a pedestal as tall as I was—stood intact, whole, beautiful, undisturbed. More empty pods ringed it, facing it as if they were trying to bask in its light, and once my eyes adjusted to the pod's brilliance I could make out a hulking metal machine behind it, and I could tell that it was the source of the vibration in my feet.

We stood, I somehow knew, in the center of the place. This chrysalis—this was the world's heart.

While I stopped to stare at the pod with an open mouth, the Grand Mother climbed up the pedestal's five steps and stood blocking its light. She turned around to face me, face in shadow thanks to the light behind her, and then she spread her arms like some prophetic nightmare.

"This is the Bright Lady," she said, "but I trust you knew that already." Her crone's voice dropped into a whispering hiss. "You knew her, after all."

"I—" I choked out, confused and a little frightened and _what?,_ and the Grand Mother moved aside.

"Look at her," the Grand Mother ordered, walking down the steps to stand at my side. Her hand in the small of my back urged me on. "Go. Go to her and look."

And so I did, moving up the steps one at a time, slowly. The pod's clear face had a coating of dust, so I wiped it away with my shirtsleeve and peered inside.

Piece by piece, inch by inch, I began to see. The body's skin was smooth and tan, covered by a glittering network of small silver dots connected by thin threads of more silver metal, and the limbs were long, proportional, and strong. Narrow-waisted and with small hips, the woman had a boyish build and a tall body, with long hair that fell from her head in a blonde waterfall. The mass of it puddle in the pod's base and obscured her legs all the way up to the knee; how long was it, I wondered, if it had been growing for ten thousand years without a trim?

But the hair held my interest for only a moment because that's when I saw, that's when I _really_ _saw_, the woman's face.

Her cupid's bow mouth would smile easily; I knew that much, and her wide-set almond eyes would be blue, and the lashes lying thick on her high cheekbone were geared more toward being ignored than slathered by mascara. Her strong square jaw with its slightly clefted chin, the way her straight nose pulled all of her features together into a face of strength and poise, a face that would, if she were only to open her mouth and laugh, be put to shame by how warm she really was, by her sense of humor and inner might and willingness to love, to understand, to accept, to be goofy and silly when I wanted it but serious and comforting when I _needed_ it—

I knew her. I knew her so well it hurt to breathe. The only thing I could do, the only thing my reeling mind was capable of _forcing_ my body to do, was gasp out a name.

"Lauren," I whispered. "Oh my god, _Lauren_."

* * *

_NOTES:_

… _please don't kill me…_

… _but at least Dani rescued herself, right?_

_... and it least this was the longest chapter ever, right? _

… _do you see which fanfiction cliché(s) I'm going to dive into next?_

… _and Dani's tattoo: what's up with it?_

_NEW ART BY MISUZU-PM ON PROFILE! GO CHECK IT OUT! =D A lovely painted portrait of Dani! YAYNESS!_

_So the reviewers of last week's chapter get an extra special thanks. Why? It's because the Holiday/Chrismahannaquanzadon season meant that fewer people had time to review (or even read) and I do not deserve the love you gave even though your schedules were perhaps too busy to give it. Hence, I LOVE YOU, READERS! __**AskingAlice, Koryu Elric, Fuurai, Supreme Baka, Kaiya's Watergarden, Foxgirl Ray, itsallaboutbob, Dreamehz, Kai-Chan94, chocolateluvr13, Doily Rox, MusicFiend666, DaAmazingMeepers, Angel of Randomosity, Yoko Kiara14, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer**_ (Did you know that your PMs have been disabled? Because I tried to talk to you and I was rejected most soundly. I was heartbroken!), _**Reclun, AkaMizu-Chan, yumchaitea, BiGayStraightWhoCares, darkrevensnight, unknown player, Mihakuu, Off-Color, j.d.y., 0nfateswings, TallyYoungBlood DevilAngelWold27, colbub, etowa-ru, Katt Jeane, Willowleaf2560, OhhTaylorJade, Snowgirl7589 and ShadowFireFox13!**_


	52. Chapter 52: Time After Time

Future Talk

Chapter 52:

"Time After Time"

* * *

I am going to take a moment to detail my understanding of core events, pre-Lauren.

First, I had been assured (on multiple occasions) that I, Danielle Elaine Thompson, had died by the hand of a rapist. It happened on my twentieth birthday. It happened quickly. It happened before my time.

Second, I had been summarily transported—based on merits such as my supposed 'bravery' and my knowledge of the Yu Yu Hakusho universe—into another world. Not only that, I had been sent _back in that world's time_ in order to prevent a disaster which would spell its (and the rest of existence's) ruination.

Third, I was given a new body. My new shell had had limited interaction with the outside world near the end of its life, and because of this I had been told that no time paradoxes could occur. The body could take and hold my original appearance thanks to its shape-shifting abilities, abilities I learned to harness, albeit in limited form.

Fourth, by changing the future I would isolate the past from the new-present, essentially sealing off the threats in an alternative timeline that would never have the power to touch the other realities again.

Now I am going to talk about my understanding of events, post-Lauren.

First, I was still pretty sure I had died in the mugging incident. After all, my memories of the stabbing and its aftermath are clear, so there's no way to dispute the fact that I am, for all pertinent points and purposes, a zombie.

Second, Lauren's appearance called into question whether or not I had _actually_ been sent into another world. Didn't her appearance suggest that the world I used to know was very much a part of this new one, and _not_ some distant alternate reality? Her presence also called into question whether or not _I_ had been sent into the past—the fact that the Grand Mother recognized me and knew my name, coupled with her not-so-subtle suggestions that I was, in fact, a Bright One, led me to suspect that both Lauren and I had somehow been sent into the _future_.

Note, however, that my soul may have been pulled _from_ the past, _into_ the future, then sent _back_ in time to the point I was currently living. So I had gone both forward _and_ backward in time, one after the other?

My head hurts. Time for point number three.

Third, I was no longer certain my body was a _random_ shapeshifter's. The suggestion that I was the daughter of a shapeshifter who had been in league with the Sisters makes me think there's more to that than meets the eye (coincidence, I've learned, seems to favor me heavily), though what my conjecturing really means at this point is anyone's guess.

And fourth, I was pretty sure I had changed the future drastically, even if I hadn't yet managed to avert the looming apocalypse. After all, if Koenma had seen a twist like this coming, he would have warned me ahead of time.

Right?

* * *

The gas mask fell from my fingers and struck the ground with a small, distant clink of glass on metal. I stared at Lauren's sleeping face for a moment, thoughts of my nature and Koenma's ever-growing list of deceptions streaming through my head as I stared, swallowed, and stared some more. I couldn't feel the floor beneath my feet; the world seemed to tilt on its axis until I threatened to slide off into space; my pulse sped to a sprint them slowed to a lumbering crawl. Eventually I managed to turn around, though tearing my eyes from Lauren proved nigh impossible, and I pushed my rushing thoughts aside long enough to say: "How do you know me?"

The Grand Mother inclined her head, imperious even as she smiled in triumph. "You know that answer as well as I, Danielle," she said, still smiling that same, wry smile. "Though I must admit, your choice of name left little to the imagination. Danielle _Elaine_ Thompson, _Elaina_…" She shook her head, but she still didn't quit smiling, dammit! "Your sense of deceit is meager, at best."

I breathed a little quicker. "I wasn't trying to deceive you," I said. "I wasn't… _I don't know how you know me_!"

The final sentence came out in a panicked wail, and I put my hands over my face. No tears came, however, because I was far too shocked to cry.

The Grand Mother paused before saying: "Truly?"

I did not reply. I pressed the heels of my hands into my palms until I saw stars.

"You truly don't remember, do you?" she said, tone dropping halfway into awe and halfway into dark realization. "This is…" Her tone solidified back into its normal commanding register. "I cannot claim surprise, however. We did not even realize you had left us until you were gone."

I froze, slowly lowering my hands until I could see her standing below me. The boys, behind her, seemed confused, wary, and tense, but I paid them little mind.

"Gone?" I whispered.

"Yes," she said, and she turned around with a swirl of cloak. She took a few steps toward one of the pods facing Lauren's pod, one of the ones in the circle that set Lauren apart from the rest of the carefully ordered rows in the strange room, and she stood before it with her hands behind her back.

"Come here, Danielle," she said.

Though I loathed the thought of leaving Lauren's sleeping side, I slowly descended the stairs, walked past the boys, and approached the Grand Mother.

Yusuke, as I passed, hissed: "Dani, what's going on?"

I ignored him and stood next to the old Sister, who looked at me out of the corner of her all-black eye and said: "We were taught the Sacred Tongue by the first Bright Ones, but they never taught us to read their language." Her eyes went back to the pod, lingering on the base of it right next to the floor. "Only the Grand Mothers, myself and those who came before alike, know how to read the ancient symbols."

She knelt, then, and passed her hand over the pod's base. Dust caked her skin when she pulled away, and bright metal gleamed where she had wiped.

"There is a name here," she said. "I could read it if my eyes were not so dim in my old age." She smiled a little as she stood and backed up. "Read it for me, if you will."

And so I did. I bent, blonde hair tumbling about my face, and stared at the small metal plate engraved with the English letters I hadn't seen in many, many weeks. I froze when I looked at them, unable to think clearly as their hidden sounds ricocheted around inside my skull like loose bullets, like cannon fire, like marbles in a metal drum, like—

"Dani, what's _wrong_?" Yusuke said from somewhere behind me, and I stood up. I kept my eyes fixed on the pod, on its wide-open door and dusty interior and…

"Dani," Hiei hissed, but I did not say anything.

There was no way—no way in _hell_—that I could answer him just yet.

The Grand Mother walked past me and to the pod on my left, the one next to the one whose name I had just read. Again she knelt, again she wiped the dust away, and again she bade me read the words imprinted there. I did so without feeling myself walk and bend, and when I saw the new name I couldn't help what happened next: my knees gave out and I pitched backward, landing hard on my butt so my teeth clacked painfully together. The metal gleamed, watching me as I raised a trembling hand and pointed it at the pod.

"What is this?" I stammered, voice barely hitting above a whisper. "What _is_ this?"

"What was the first name?" the Grand Mother said.

"It can't be," I said. My hand dropped; I curled in on myself, hands twining into my hair as my staff fell to the ground with a peal of sound, like music. "It just _can't_!"

The Grand Mother said: "It can, Danielle. You know it to be true."

And so I said it, because what else could I do? The words were hard to articulate aloud, partially because I could hardly wrap my head around what I was seeing, the impossibility presented before me in no unclear terms, but nevertheless I swallowed and opened my mouth to say in a harsh, wavering whisper, the name of my mother.

"Pamela Lynn Thompson," I said, and my hands began to shake in my hair.

The Grand Mother did not recognize my pain, or allow me time to rest and take it all in. "And the second name?" she asked brusquely. "Say it. It should be an easy matter for you."

But that name was, of course, harder to say than the first, though I suppose that was to be expected.

After all, it was _my_ name.

"Danielle Elaine Thompson," I said in a rush of breath, and my throat snapped closed as the tears crammed out the corners of my eyes. "Danielle, Elaine… _my_ name."

"So you _are_ Danielle," the Grand Mother said, and she smiled, head tilting back so she could regard the ceiling in wonder. "Our hour has come at last. Praise be."

I stared at her, eyes wide and streaming silent tears, and then I felt a hand on my shoulder. A wash of heat let me know it was Hiei before he knelt at my side and asked: "Dani. What's wrong?"

I opened my mouth to speak, hands coming out of my hair so I could grab at his warm, strong arm, but all that came out of my mouth was a small, broken cry. Hiei's eyes narrowed, and he put his hand to the side of my face and stared at me so hard I thought I'd combust. Then, however, I felt him touch my mind with his, and I let him in so he could coax the memories of what had just happened to the surface. He saw Lauren through my eyes, saw my mother's name, saw _my_ name and the horrible contradictions it alluded to—

"I don't understand, Hiei," I said, pouring all of my confusion and longing and oh-my-god-I-am-about-to-have-a-break-down into my short, enunciated words. "I _died_. This can't be _me_."

His hand tightened on my shoulder as his jaw clenched tight, and he asked: "So what does this mean, then, Dani?"

I couldn't answer him. How could I? Hiei, however, just shook me once with a gentle undulation of his arm and repeated: "What is going on, Dani? Tell me."

"Dude, what's wrong with her?" Kuwabara asked, coming to join me and Hiei on the floor.

Hiei shot him a sharp look, and then Kuwabara's eyes glazed over. A second later he shook his head as if to clear the cobwebs, and he looked at me in newfound horror.

"Is Hiei telling me the truth, Dani?" he asked in a low, urgent voice. Narrow brown eyes were open wide in concern and shock. "You're… you're a Bright One?"

My lips trembled. "I… I don't _know_!" I said, and I let Hiei go so I could wrap my arms around my knees and bury my face in them. "I don't know _anything_! I _died_! I _didn't_ get put in a chrysalis and live for ten thousand years underground, I'm _not_ a Bright One, my _mom's_ not a Bright One, I'm not—"

As actual sobs managed to break through my wall of numb disbelief and unfelt tears, I heard Yusuke say: "Hey Hiei, show _us_ too!"

A second past, and then Kurama murmured: "This certainly does change things."

Hiei let out a low growl, one that made the hairs on the back of my neck rise to attention. His heat left me as he stood, and when I looked up I saw that he had drawn his sword from its scabbard, advanced on the Grand Mother, and was pointing the weapon straight up at her face. She towered over him even though her back was curved with age, but that didn't faze Hiei in the slightest.

"Tell me, witch," he said. "What tricks are you playing?"

She said in perfect, accented Japanese: "There are no tricks here, demon. What you see before you reflects the truest truth."

"Hey, you speak Japanese!" Yusuke said accusingly, walking to Hiei's side so he could further threaten the Grand Mother with his presence. "What's up with that? I thought all you people hated—"

"I have lived long enough to see what lies beyond these lands, and to know that ignorance could spell death," the Grand Mother said imperiously, and she met my eyes. They were much softer all of a sudden. "Tradition dictates that men are inferior to women, but I do not hold such teachings as dear as others of my kind. Your mother, Danielle… she taught me there was more to life than staunch tradition. I have many things to thank her for." Her chin inclined a little. "Now please, show me your true face. I tire of Pamela's when what I really want to see is your own. After all, it has been so long."

Because she asked and because I felt like keeping my own face a secret was a bit of a moot point, I somehow quieted my tears, forced myself to change back into my own face, and stand up. I recovered my staff and clutched at it, drawing strength from its silky skin and the way it purred in my hands…

"Oh, Danielle," the Grand Mother said. Her sigh wasn't one of petulance or patronization, just of longing fulfilled and distinct relief. "It is so good to see you again, even if you've never seen me as I've seen you."

I didn't want to think about me right then, or ever. "You knew my mother?" I said. My tears had dried; perhaps I was just numb, but whatever the case was, I was glad to be able to think clearly again. Hopefully the spell would last.

She nodded. "And I knew you, too, though only through the glass of your chrysalis."

My breath shuddered when I drew it in to say: "I don't remember this place. And I don't remember going into one of these chrysalises. I don't remember _anything_."

"Many of the Bright Ones did not remember their internment in their case," the Grand Mother said. "The memory was traumatic for some of them, and during their sleep they blocked it out in order to heal the pain. You must be suffering similarly."

"But," I began, and she shushed me.

"Danielle, you must forgive me for interrupting you, but there is something you must do before I answer your many questions." She walked forward, between Yusuke and Hiei without sparing them a second look. "And I will answer your questions, but you must wake the Bright Lady, Lauren, up. Time is of the essence."

My breathing hitched. "Seishou?" I said. "The Dark One?"

"Yes," she said, nodding. "He will take her if he can and he will use her to meet his own ends, ones I know of and ones I will not allow to pass if even if I have to give my life—" She stopped, trying to compose herself, and then she looked back at me. Her eyes held a heartfelt plea. "So please, Danielle—wake your friend up. All have tried, but you will not fail. I know it."

I looked over at Lauren's pod; I could barely make out her form amidst the blue glow surrounding her like a menacing halo. "I have no idea how to wake her up, though," I said, and the Grand Mother took my free hand in her own. Mine seemed the size of an infant's lying against her gnarled palm.

"I will show you what others tried to do, and failed to do," she said softly, and she tugged me after her toward Lauren's resting place. I met Hiei's eyes as I started to climb the stairs, and in them I could see many things—things like doubt, wariness, and a hint of worry I knew was supposed to be for me. Seeing him gave me a little more strength, and I flashed a tentative smile in his direction before standing with the Grand Mother before Lauren's pod.

The crone took my hand, held it up, and pressed my palm flat on the glass. "Keep your hand there," she said, and she backed away. The glass felt icy cold on my skin. "You will see it in a… there."

What happened next was a curious thing. The blue light around Lauren flashed brighter for an instant before pulling in on itself, growing more and more concentrated within the pod's chamber at the cost of making the rest of the room grow dim. Eventually the light coalesced on Lauren's body, specifically on the small metal nibs and netting decorating her skin, and then the pinpoints of light beamed themselves outward like a thousand tiny projectors. The multitude of bright blue laser-points shot onto the inside of the glass, and they swirled around in a series of geometric shapes and numbers before forming a square around my palm and spread fingers.

To my surprise, a clicking metallic voice came from nowhere and said: "Scanning in progress."

A solid horizontal line of lights shot off of Lauren's body and scanned the square around my hand from bottom to top. A faint buzzing in my palm and a chilling sensation were the only other things of note.

"Scanning complete," the voice said, coolly feminine and passionless and more than a little creepy. "Welcome, user. Initiating vocal verification. State your name."

I hesitated, then said: "Danielle Elaine Thompson."

A click, and then: "Verification complete. Welcome, Danielle."

The Grand Mother, still standing at my side, said in English: "If you ask it to do something, it will try. But you must know the words to persuade it." She put a hand on my head, long fingers giving my hair a slow caress. "Your mother could not guess the words, but she said you would be able to given your friendship with the Bright Lady. She said your friendship itself was the key. I have no idea what she meant, but _time_, she said, would prevail." She stepped back again. "Good luck."

I nodded at her, and I looked at Lauren. I tried to keep my own face calm, but…

I felt nervous. Of _course_ I felt nervous. Lauren's face—dimmer now that the light wasn't backlighting it—seemed serene, and knowing that I pretty much held her life in my hands, that Seishou would take her if I didn't hurry and get her out of the barren wasteland of a world…

I had no time for worry, or for hesitation. I needed to dive right in.

"I want to wake Lauren up," I said as loudly and clearly as I could. "Wake Lauren up, please."

A light click echoed through the room. Then the voice said: "Revival protocol initiated. Name subject."

"Lauren Renee Oppenheim," I said, and there came another click followed closely by a low thrum that made the glass on my best friend's pod shiver. My elbow shook a little from the force of the vibration, but I tried as hard as I could to keep my hand steady.

"State pass sequence," the voice said, and waited.

I sat there, thinking about it for a long time, wondering just what the _heck_ Lauren would have chosen as her pass key. Surely not her birthday (Lauren wasn't stupid enough to choose something like that, not like I would have) or her pet's name (again, that was me, not her) or her hometown (I'm an idiot). She was the type to choose the Fibonacci sequence or some obscure mathematical theorem, and just how the heck was I supposed to contend with that?

_What was it the Grand Mother said?_ I thought, staring at Lauren. _That our friendship was the key?_

_No,_ I thought. _No, that's not all she said. She said my mother said that time would prevail here. That not even time could separate Lauren and I, and…_

My breathing hitched, and I blinked back a prick of tears.

_You always were a rank sentimentalist, Lauren,_ I thought, smiling a bittersweet smile, and I didn't really think as I took a deep breath to prepare myself for what came next. I just looked at Lauren, at her pretty sleeping face and her smudge of dark lashes, and sang: "If you're lost you can look you will find me—time after time." I paused, swallowed, and went on with: "If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting—time after time."

For a moment, I thought I'd failed. Nothing happened after my thin, high voice drifted off into the blue-black dark, and I heard one of the boys shift from foot to foot behind me. Then, however, the voice burbled a little and the lights on Lauren's skin abruptly went out.

"Pass sequence confirmed," the voice stated calmly. "Preparing subject revival and evacuation. Standby."

The glass under my hand shuddered and seemed to twist, and I pulled back. I would have tripped backward over the first step had the Grand Mother not been standing behind me, and I landed against her and she wrapped her arms around my torso, walking us back down the steps until we stood at the foot of Lauren's dais. The guys crowded in around us as the Grand Mother let me go to stand on my own feet and staff, and then Hiei grabbed my elbow and put his lips up against my ear.

"That song?" he said, warmth hissing over my skin. "She sang that to you when you were children, I _saw_ it."

I shuddered, leaning into him a little because all of this was just too much at once, _dammit_, and I needed _something_.

"It was ours," I said, and his hand tightened on my arm. "It, it seemed to fit."

"Finally," the Grand Mother murmured. "She awakens."

And so all of us, all of us together… we watched.

The lights slowly came back up, a smattering of stars inside the pod that I knew were lined up with the metal net snaking all over Lauren. They grew brighter and brighter until it almost hurt to look at them, and then I heard an odd hissing noise and a billow of white cloud surge into the pod's chamber. The clouds obscured the light and made it spread all along the cloud, glowing like a luminescent sea, and then the cloud seemed to dissolve into countless tiny whirlpools and get drawn deep into the pinpoints of light. They grew brighter with every swirl of steam until the light became too much to bear and I had to shut my eyes and look sideways at the wall. Even then the light burned through my eyelids, and I had to cover my face with my hand to keep from feeling like I'd go permanently blind.

Though the light was by no means warm, I still felt it go out like a heatlamp getting turned away from my face. I dropped my hand and blinked up at the pod, seeing that it had all grown dim and dark and that the room was now almost unseeable in the gloom, but I hardly cared because I heard a sharp pop and then a glide of metal on well-oiled metal and the glass door was swinging wide open and—

Her hair spilled out, first, in a golden tumble dyed dark with shadow, and then one pale leg moved forward. She stepped out of the pod in a daze, hair tangling with her feet as she moved delicately down onto the metal floor. Her eyes were only halfway open (I couldn't see the blue, just a vague bright glitter) and her lips were parted as she breathed deeply, slowly, deliberately. Her hair draped around her body, swathing her in a fine gauzy curtain of pale strands like a spider's web.

"Awake," the Grand Mother said. She had tears in her eyes. "Finally… awake!"

But Lauren didn't look like she was awake, not really, more like she was sleeping walking or whatever—

I couldn't help stepping forward, up one stairstep, then two, and saying: "Lauren?"

Her face, framed as it was by that absurdly long hair, turned in my direction, and then she smiled. Straight white teeth, pink lips, cheeks moving up so high her eyes squinted further shut… Her voice was scratchy when she spoke, but it was _her_ voice, so undeniably _Lauren's voice_ that I immediately felt more tears spring into my eyes.

"I thought I heard you singin', Dani," Lauren said in her wonderfully low alto. Her slow drawl sounded just like it always did, full of warmth and contentment and told-you-so. "I missed that."

I swallowed because I would have sobbed otherwise. "You're… you're OK?" I asked, looking her up and down.

"Oh, maybe," she said, swaying a little. Her eyes fluttered. "I just got out of one of the chambers, didn't I?"

I could do nothing but tell her: "Yes."

She yawned. "'splains why I'm so tired," she said, grinning. "I'm 'bout to fall into a restorative sleep, Dani. Take care of me while I'm out 'cause I ain't wakin' up anytime soon." Another yawn, and this time her knees gave out. I hopped up the steps with a cry of her name, but she waved me off as she rested on her hands and knees, sinking wrist-deep into a cushion of her own hair.

"I'm fine, Dan," she said, but this time she couldn't crack a smile because her body had gone as limp as a wet rag. I grabbed her shoulders and eased her onto her back, hair tangling everywhere as I cradled her larger body in my arms as best I could.

"I never thought I'd see you again," I whispered, reaching up to touch her face with trembling fingers. She felt too real, too warm, too solid, _I thought she was gone forever but now she's here and_—

Her eyes were closed and her lips hardly moved, but I could still hear the smile in her voice when she said: "I told ya I'd see ya again, dummy."

"But how could I be sure?" I asked. My voice cracked on the last syllable.

"Time after time, remember?" she said, and her head lolled bonelessly to one side. With a lurch her breathing turned deeper and guttural and harsh—

"Is she OK? She sounds like she's choking!" I heard Kuwabara say, and I let out a peal of laughter that bordered on the realm of hysterics.

"She's snoring!" I gasped out between laughs as my best friend sawed logs in my arms. "She's _snoring_! I used to want to kill her for it when we had sleepovers, but now—" I hunched over her, back convulsing as I laughed and chortled and giggled. "Now it's music! It's fucking _music_!"

She was still snoring when the Grand Mother walked over to us and took Lauren—my best friend, the Bright Lady, a goddess who wasn't one, not really, because what kind of goddess _snores_ like that?—into her arms. I was too limp to protest, but when the Grand Mother said my name I snapped out of my trance long enough to start twining the length of Lauren's long hair around my arm in an unending silken loop.

"Thank you, Danielle," the Grand Mother said when I finished gathering up Lauren's hair. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," I said. I took a deep breath. "Can I have my answers now?"

* * *

Since we were safest in the hall of the chrysalises, we took a few minutes to get settled in better. The Grand Mother laid Lauren out on her back so she could sleep in peace, snoring all the while, and while she fussed with her—really, she was acting like a doting mother or something—she rescued the gas mask from where I'd dropped it by the pod and carefully put it over Lauren's face. I missed the sight of Lauren's peaceful face, but I could still hear her light snores and I kept one ear on them to monitor her health.

Each snore was a blessing. Like I said, each snore was _music_.

I turned to the boys while the Grand Mother worked with Lauren. They already knew the long and short of it (about my name on the pods and my mother's name, and thanks to Hiei being a productive scamp they knew who Lauren was to a brief extent) but I still filled them in on my thoughts.

"… and so I opened the chamber thing with a password only I'd know since Lauren and I are friends, and apparently no one else could do it before me," I finished, and I glanced at Lauren. She lay at the foot of her pod, head in the Grand Mother's lap. "And I'm a Bright One apparently, but I remember dying and there's nothing in my memory about those chrysalis things."

"Well, if the Grand Mother knows answer, we'll get them out of her," Yusuke assured me with a wink, and he cracked his knuckles as he turned to the aforementioned woman. "Hey you! I know you speak Japanese, so start talking so we can understand!"

Black eyes turned my way, and in English the Grand Mother asked: "Would you like your men to know the truth as well?"

"We're all in this together," I said in Japanese, and the Grand Mother gave a small nod before resuming her stroking of Lauren's brow. "Where do you want to start?"

She said nothing for a time, and Yusuke let out a frustrated sigh before throwing himself down on the dais's steps. Eventually, however, she began to speak.

"When they brought you to me when they found you after being poisoned by Sioh, Danielle," she said, "I recognized your face as Pamela, your mother. But I knew as soon as I felt your energy that you were not her. Her energy was darker than yours, and, toward the end, it was less focused."

My heart thudded. "The end?" I said, not liking the sound of that at all.

She nodded. "Besides yourself and the Bright Lady, your mother was the last Bright One left," she said slowly. "She woke up a little over five hundred years ago, while one other Bright One still lived with us, with no memory of her past life before emerging from her chrysalis."

My heart rate thudded even faster. "You mean, she didn't remember—"

The Grand Mother shook her head. "She did not remember you until several years later, when she bumped her head in a nasty fall. Then, however, she came back here and looked at your sleeping face, and she remembered everything."

"This remembrance changed her," she continued. "She watched the other living Bright One, Sister Andrea, waste away and die from this world's poison, and when she saw what the air would eventually do to her—and later, to you—she became obsessed with finding a way to beat the weaknesses of the Bright Ones."

"So she designed the gas mask," I said, glancing at Lauren's covered face.

"Correct," said the Grand Mother. "Pamela disappeared from our midst to look for the proper building materials, wandering in from time to time to rest, but she never found what she sought." Her tone grew grieved. "One day, she never returned."

_Mom… died?_ I thought, remembering the long-ago scene of watching a shapeshifter get slain by two ogres. _Was that how she died? Is that how I got this body?_

"The Bright Ones who emerged in the last thousand years or so have been very special, Danielle," she said, not noticing my preoccupation. "They have emerged with longer-lasting immunities to this world's air, and with strengths more befitting demons than the earlier, weak-in-body Bright Ones. Your mother in particular had a strong natural ability, the ability to change her shape at will, and this afforded her a very unique gift. By shifting her shape to a demon's, she was able to resist being poisoned by the air." Her tone went darker. "Her demon form, however, was terrifying to behold, and when she took it it changed her. She became savage, bestial, and violent…" A pause. "But I can very easily assure you that she was the longest-lived Bright One in our history, living for many years when most of her kind could barely stand a few months."

_Which is why I'm immune?_ I asked myself. _Because I'm inside my mother's body?_

Suddenly, my skin began to crawl.

_And her 'demon form' must be that horrible Noh-mask thing I can turn into_, I thought, wrapping my hands tighter around my comforting staff. _So it drove her crazy? Maybe she just forgot to come back, because she was so wrapped up in that form._

A new thought occurred.

_Will taking it turn me into a beast, too? But at the same time, will it boost my immunity here? _

My stomach churned.

_Am I really in my mother's body?_

"I assumed you were your mother, returned to us at last, when the Riders brought you before me," the Grand Mother said, oblivious to my inner monologue. "Then, however, I felt your energy and I knew you were not Pamela. But who, then, could take on her face, bear the mask—the product of her toil—and know enough of the Sisters to find our homeland?"

"The name 'Elaina' clinched it for me," the Grand Mother said. "It could only be you, her daughter. After all, you had only vanished from your pod a few months before—you could have withstood the air for that long, especially if you had inherited your mother's strange traits… which you have."

I swallowed. "I suppose," I managed to say.

Kurama stepped forward and addressed the Grand Mother at theat point, but she did not sseem to take it as a sign of disrespect. "So you say Dano vanished from her chrysalis several months ago?" Kurama said.

The Grand Mother nodded.

The demon turned his shrewd green eyes my way. "You vanished from here around the same time you appeared in our world, Dani," he said in a low voice. "You must have wandered out of here and through a randomly occurring rift to the Human World. It's a long-shot of a coincidence, but it fits."

I swallowed. "I don't remember anything."

The Grand Mother pushed past our words without seeming to care, and her eyes crinkled with a smile. "So did you meet Pamela in the outside world?" she asked me. "I assume so since you carry her mask. I am elated to hear she still lives, and—"

I shook my head to silence her. "I didn't meet her," I had to say. "I don't know if she's alive, and I didn't know what had happened to her when I woke up." I took a deep breath. "I don't remember being put in the chrysalis, nor why I would have been put there. My last memory before waking up in a place very, very far from here and meeting these men, is being stabbed to death."

The Grand Mother's face darkened.

"I saw a girl, about to—about to get raped," I stammered. "I tried hitting the man over the head, but he turned around and he stabbed…" I squeezed my eyes shut, hating to have to relive the memory and hating the way it called up memories of Ryu's recent and unholy attack. I still felt cold in the hollow beneath my ribs. "That's where my memory ends."

"Then all the times you mother visited you in your chrysalis, whispering her plans and drawing strength from the sight of your face… your subconscious must remember that even if you don't," she said. Behind her eyes I saw that this was her opinion and that it would never change, so I did not try to do so.

"I suppose," I said, not really buying it, but what else was there to believe, anyway?

"We could discuss the reasons for your remembrance all day, of course," the Grand Mother said, and her tone went wistful. "Your mother, Danielle… she was a dear friend to me. I was a Rider when she came among us, and we were close. She often stayed in this room, speaking to you and the Bright Lady, telling you stories about the Sisters and telling me stories about the you and the Lady as children." She laughed a little. "I know the two of you painted a tree when you were small. The Lady led that charge, but you went along gamely enough and used your hair to scoop up paint."

The memory made me smile. "I remember that," I said (Kuwabara muttered something about me and Lauren not being kept in the same room; I ignored him). "But can I ask you a question?"

The Grand Mother nodded, not hesitating in the least. "You are my Sister, a Bright One, a friend of the Lady, and a daughter of a beloved friend. You may ask me anything."

I smiled in thanks. "Did any of the Bright Ones say why we were put in our chrysalises?" I asked.

Her smile faded as quickly as it had come. "They did," she said. "It is a secret only the Grand Mothers are allowed to know, for it does not paint a pleasant picture of our deities."

I snorted. "We're not deities. We're just—"

"Humans?" the Grand Mother supplied, and my mouth snapped shut. "Yes, I know that the Bright Ones are merely humans, but the rest of the Sisters do not. That secret is also guarded by the Grand Mother, though it changes little on how I feel about the Bright Ones. Your kind taught us things about sanitation, medicine, and architecture that have helped our people prosper. The circumstances of your race matter little as a consequence."

"But why are we in the chrysalises?" I asked.

"Because your people destroyed themselves," she said simply. "The lords of your world placed their favorite and most useful individuals into the chrysalises in order to ride out the destruction of your world, and this is where you ended up." She shook her head. "I am not clear on the details. Few of the Bright Ones were, either. Memories grew hazy during the time while you slept, or they disappeared completely."

"I see," I said.

"No, you don't," the Grand Mother said. For once her composure cracked; withered lips parted over pointed teeth, snarling at something only she could see as she stroked, stroked, stroked Lauren's too-long hair. "You only see the half of it."

"What's the other half, then?" I said, a feeling of foreboding rising high within my chest.

Her words were tense. "The Dark One," she said, and I felt my heart rate start to sprint. "He is not what you think he is, and for all my talk of secrets, his looms the largest over me."

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?" Yusuke said suddenly, and the Grand Mother looked down at him. He stared back, uncaring that she saw him as little more than a bug, and I almost smiled at that. Leave it to Yusuke to make me smile at a time like that, right?

"It means that the Dark One's origin is something passed from Grand Mother to Grand Mother, with no intermediate Sisters in between," she said. "None of my counselors know, none of the Riders know, _no one_ knows. It is simply myself and the Dark One. We hold the secret fast." Her chin lifted. "Feel honored that I am about to impart this secret unto you."

"Yeah yeah, lady," Yusuke muttered, but the Grand Mother did not hear.

"When our first leader, Hinotama, first found this place and saw the Bright Ones, she did not find only this room." Her eyes met each of ours in turn, as if daring us to contradict her. "When the Salamander came and began to prey upon the Bright Ones, Hinotama chased it from the room, down a long corridor, and into another room. This one was also filled with Bright Ones."

"OK, so there were more of them," Yusuke said. "What's the point?"

The Grand Mother pinned him with a glare. "The point," she thundered in a whisper, "is that all of these Bright Ones were _men_."

My jaw fell to pretty much the floor. I heard Kurama mutter something, and Hiei growled a little at my side. I glanced at him; he appeared to be seething, but when I looked at him his anger quelled.

The Grand Mother stroked Lauren's hair, as if looking for comfort in its softness. "All but a few of the chrysalises in that chamber were destroyed in Hinotama's fight with the Salamander," she said, "and when she slew the beast, it collapsed atop one of the final untouched chambers, bleeding on it and around it until it swam in a sea of blood."

"She left that pod alone, assuming it was dead and that its occupant would never bother anyone again." A hand fisted in blonde strands. "But she was wrong. A thousand years later the chrysalis sprang open, and the man, whole and unharmed, stepped out."

"One of the previous Grand Mothers found him, of course, since she knew he existed and had been watching for his potential release. Our ways back then were different than they are now, and the man was taken as one of our many slaves and treated with markedly less honor than we treat our men today, who we now regard as partners." She took a breath to steady herself, and said: "The abuse proved to be too much, and he grew—mad, I think you'd call it. Insane."

My mouth had gone dry.

"Everyone has their breaking point," she went on. "He, too, eventually snapped. Enraged one day after being beaten for a minor transgression, he slew an entire group of Sisters with powers none of us knew he had, and he fled, appearing a year later to attack us again. Ever since then, this man has been known as the Dark One, even though his nature is closer to that of the Bright."

"Seishou," I gasped, short of breath and feeling very much faint. I wasn't sure why I blurted out my next words, but they seemed important and— "Seishou, he's the Dark One, and he's working with _Hogosha_!"

Rather than act surprised, the Grand Mother merely closed her eyes, resigned. "I know," she said, hurt radiating from every syllable. "I know. Hogosha's man, that human boy named Ryu… he rules her, and he has allied himself with the Dark One. I had hoped she would abandon them both after taking part in the Hunt, but…" She smiled a broken smile. "I cannot help but love my granddaughter."

I froze.

_Granddaughter_?

_SERIOUSLY_?

I could hardly wrap my head around that one. Luckily, the Grand Mother did it for me.

"My daughter flirted with danger and conceived Hogosha," she said. "She died in childbirth, and Hogosha was saved by Sister Andrea's hand. She is forever indebted to the Bright Ones."

"And that," she said softly, "makes her betrayal sting all the worst." She looked up, but her eyes held little apology. "I confess, however, that it mostly my fault. I allowed Hogosha to be treated badly. 'It will make her strong,' I thought, but now…" She trailed off, looking back down at Lauren's face. "Now she works with the man who seeks to bring us to ruin, by using the Bright Lady's power to end it all."

"The Bright Lady has powers?" I asked, because it sounded kind of important and thinking about Hogosha would depress me in a flash, and the Grand Mother nodded.

"They are another secret of mine," she said. "The Bright Lady, or so the other Bright Ones have said, was the one who created the chrysalises." A part of me was not surprised by this, but I resolved to think about it later. "Her mother, though, was the one who created the device that destroyed the Bright One's home."

The bottom fell out of my stomach. I dimly remembered Lauren's mother working for the government, but I banished the thoughts because—

"The Bright Lady, therefore, could possess the key to reawakening this power, whatever it may be," the Grand Mother said. "Keeping her safe and out of the Dark One's hands means keeping the world as we know it intact."

"That is what we are here for, Grand Mother," Kurama said, stepping forward again. The Grand Mother raised an eyebrow, but perhaps his diffident tone and somewhat feminine appearance afforded him a higher level of tolerance. "We are here to keep the Bright Lady, and the worlds, safe."

"I expected as much from Danielle, who is surely her mother's daughter," the Grand Mother said. She looked back down at Lauren, fingers brushing the gas mask in a slow caress. "Tell me, Danielle—would the Bright Lady be safer amongst my people, or would she be safer, perhaps, with you in a place far from here?"

I did not hesitate, because I knew the answer to that one as surely as I knew I could count on the boys behind me. "She'd be safer with us," I said, voice firm as I stood my ground and met the Grand Mother's eyes, and her face contorted into sadness marked with pain. "These men are the most trustworthy people I have ever met, and they are dedicated to keeping her, myself, and the safety of the world itself intact. If the Bright Lady had to pick new allies, she could find no one better than my men. They are…" I paused, swallowed, and smiled. "They're my friends."

"Dani, that's so _sweet_!" Kuwabara said, throwing an arm around my shoulders with a grin and a good-natured ruffle of my loose brown hair, but he bumped my raw tattoo beneath its bandages and I flinched.

"Watch the back!" I gasped, and he hurriedly began to apologize and simper and—

The Grand Mother let out a low laugh. "You are close to them," she said, "and they would not abandon you." Her arms tightened around Lauren, but I saw the resignation in her eyes. "Very well. I give you my blessings, Danielle: take the Bright Lady and go. Flee far from here, and defeat the Dark One once and for all, for he will surely follow you in pursuit."

"But the other Sisters," I began, and she shook her head.

"They knew that, since the Bright Lady was the last and that time is not everlasting, one day she would disappear," she said. "They are prepared for this. I will speak to them, and they will pray for yours and the Bright Lady's safe return."

"And we _will_ return," I told her. "You are a new family of mine. I would be a fool not to visit, and Lauren… she owes you years of protection, and trust. She'll come back. I'll bring her myself, I promise."

A dark smile melted me. "I look forward to it," she said, and she slowly put Lauren's head out of her lap and onto the floor. She turned away and vanished behind a nearby pod, but a moment later she appeared bearing the packs containing our belongings. She crossed to us and handed them over, and then she walked back to Lauren's side. Her cloak came off with a rustle, and she carefully wrapped Lauren up in it before reaching into her tunic's neck and pulling out a long silver knife—

"Whoa there!" Kuwabara said, but all the Grand Mother did was take Lauren's mane into her fist and slice through it. Her hair fell shorter, probably falling to about her hips instead of forty feet away, and then the Grand Mother began to baid the severed hair into a long rope.

"On this island, far to the north," she said slowly, not looking at us, "you will find a field of ice that spans most of the river. Cross this to find yourself in the forest where you first met my riders." She paused, drinking in the air as she pulled strands of spun gold through her fingers. "I do not know your way from there."

"Thank you," I said. Kurama handed me my backpack, and I knelt so I could retrieve my cold-weather jacket and pants. I pulled them on over my jeans and sweatshirt, feeling like the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man as I clumsily laced up my boots, tied my hood on, and slipped my hands into my gloves.

The Grand Mother watched as I and the boys dressed ourselves, and then she cradled the cloak-wrapped Lauren in her arms and approached us. Laruen's head rolled in her sleep, and Kuwabara stepped forward without being asked.

"Carry her well," the Grand Mother said to him as she helped settle the sleeping Lauren on his broad back, and then she looked to me. "If you need allies, we are here to fight the Dark One with you," she said. She motioned for me to turn around, and when I did she placed her hand flat over my covered tattoo. "Call to your marked Sisters with your brand, Danielle, and we shall hear you."

The tattoo, the minute she got near it, began to smolder. I shuddered, and when I turned around she tugged the neck of her tunic down. A mark like mine, one of the salamander 's' shapes with a whip curling around its length, scarred the skin on her withered chest.

"We," she repeated, "shall always hear you, Sister."

* * *

We parted ways with the Grand Mother, Lauren in tow and with just as many questions as we had answers, and together we made our way north. The trees on the island provided us cover, but Hiei still kept a watchful Jagan eye on the world around us. We did not know where Seishou had fled to, nor did we know what Ryu had done after I attacked him, but we had little inclination to linger in this place when the sanctuary of Genkai's temple was but a few kilometers away, over a river and through the woods…

_To Grand-Mother's house we go_, I thought, and giggled.

The irony of that statement was not lost on me.

At any rate, it took only half an hour to walk to the northern most tip of the Bright One's small island, and with every step we took the air grew colder. Trees blocked the wind, of course, but cold began to creep in over the tops of my boots and through the small circle of opening in my hood, and Hiei stuck close in front of me to provide his unusual brand of comfort. My staff too seemed warm, like it was trying to keep my hand limber with its buzzing, heated energy, and my tattoo seemed to burn brighter in the cold as well, but Hiei was my saving grace.

He was not, however, a saving grave when we reached the ice fields.

* * *

NOTES:

_Lauren's last name comes from one of the inventors of the atomic bomb. This information is pertinent to this story. Wheeeee!_

_I went back up to college on Saturday (urgh, travelling, right?), and classes started Monday and swamped me with homework straight away, so I only had time to reply to a few reviews and writing this chapter was something of a battle. It's also why this chapter was full of talking and not much action. SO SORRY! But yeah, college. Not good. I'm still going to update Future Talk, though! And once I get used to being in school again we'll be back in action to an extreme degree. YAY!_

_To the no-name reviewer: I explained several chapters ago that human psychics with strong auras (EX: Kuwabara and Ryu) are immune to the air in Demon World. Hence, Ryu can indeed survive. Read carefully, please! Lol! XD_

_And now we have answers. Peachy keen. But not all of them. Dani still has to struggle with the implications, and you KNOW she's gonna have to talk with Koenma on the whole affair. We'll see their reunion soon enough!_

_We'll also see more on Ryu's attempted marking of Dani soon. OH THE HUMANITY._

_Next chapter WILL BE DEDICATED TO NOTHING BUT ACTION UPON ACTION UPON ACTION. SHIT YEAH._

_And my lovely reader are super-extra-special lovely, BECAUSE I LOVE THEM ALL TO ITTY BITTY PIECES AND WANT TO SNUGGLE THEM. Yeah. Because that's not going to make you want to run in the opposite direction or anything. XD The Tokyo Time Killer, DevilAngelWolf27, 0nfateswings, yumchaitea, Mihakuu, RebellAngell21, spiritfoxxx821,FoxgirlRay, Elegant Lady of Sin, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Snubbed, AkaMizu-chan, the Under-Cover Fangirl Masuyo Shun, Naitza-Kururugi, TallyYoungblood, Katt Jeane, Blazing Neko, Mosinger, DanzaPalooza, DaAmazingMeepers, Supreme Baka, Destinyswindow, Yoko Kiara14, j.d.y., AmoreVampiresv-v, Itsallaboutbob, Reality Bores Me, chocolateluvr13, Devonlizz , Snowgirl7589 , Takara Rose Oizumi , -induviduality-has-a-name-me- , DoilyRox ,Kaiya's Watergarden , Misuzu-PM , MusicFiend666 ,LMR, Out-Of-Control-Authoress , colbub , etowa-ru, misswarchan, Angel of Randomosity, Kai-Chan94 ,Fox, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares , Koryu Elric , American Senpai , Ry171819, LadyxAbsinthe, Dreamehz, XxXfiction, Asking Alice, _spiritfoxxx821, WishingWanderer!


	53. Chapter 53: Ice, Ice, Baby

Future Talk

Chapter 53:

"Ice, Ice, Baby"

* * *

Imagine, if you will, a lake. In this lake are two islands, a smaller one above a bigger one. Hardly anyone goes to these islands, a fact that can be attributed to how most of the lake runs at a brisk, bubbling boil. Swimming is impossible, boats would melt or burn, so air is the only real option when it comes to getting to the domain of the Sisters—a domain that extends not only to the islands, but also to the essential air above them. They have mastered the art of getting to those islands using a combination of natural gouts of steam off the boiling lake and the abilities of the massive flying squirrels living in a forest on the nearby mainland, soaring high over the boiling waters in ways other demons can't. They live in seclusion thanks to the water, and also to the river a few miles away from the lake. The river is hard to traverse, too, and the Sisters have several glide-points along the river's shore so they can cross it without angering the gigantic, mindless demons dwelling in its depths. Air truly is the only way to travel in that country, unless, of course, you have a deathwish…

… in which case, there's a way for _you_ to travel, too.

Remember those islands I mentioned? Yeah, you may have figured this out, but the lower one is the one the Sisters had their town on. The upper one is the one with the hall of the Bright Ones, and if you walk to the northernmost tip of that island… well, it gets colder and colder as you go. Kurama explained as we walked that the Salamanders live underground in caverns beneath the lake, hence the boiling, but the caverns don't go all the way from one end of the lake to the other. They stop somewhere between the two islands, and the natural chill in that area of Demon World quickly comes back in full force.

It wasn't surprising, therefore, to see massive chunks of ice floating in the waters to the north.

Kuwabara stopped dead when we cleared the trees and came in view of the water, breath frosting out of his open mouth as he stared, swallowed, and said: "You've gotta be kidding me."

"And me, too," Yusuke said.

"Ice, ice, baby," I muttered. "Dun-dun-dun-dunuh-nuh-nuh…"

Kurama studied the scene before us with a critical eye. "It's… going to be difficult," he said, voice schooled into a polite, mild, and comforting type of thing that I thought was _totally_ at odds with the situation. After all, it wasn't every day you saw a lake covered in a film of ice, with icebergs that looked like fallen tombstones embedded in the layer at random. It looked like some sort of cold, barren desert, and in places the ice had frozen in the shape of tall waves, like something had stirred up the water and it had frozen an instant after being disturbed. It seemed as easy to cross as, as… I don't know _what_, but whatever it was, it wasn't good.

"I don't think Lauren's going to be warm enough," I fretted, going over to Kuwabara so I could take a look at her. She was wrapped head to toe in the Grand Mother's heavy cloak, and Kurama had used all of his fireflower seeds to keep her warm besides, but still… I was fine, but what about her? My staff buzzed with warmth in my hand, and my tattoo had spread a slow glow over my entire body, and even though I couldn't help but shiver I realized that the cold was almost (but not quite unless Hiei was standing next to me) bearable.

"I think that suit of hers will provide some protection," Kurama said.

I lifted the hem of the cloak away from Lauren's arm, looking at the little silver nodules and the webbing of wire that connected them. We had learned, upon further inspection, that a fine membrane of clear _something_ connected everything at once and covered every inch of Lauren's skin from the neck down, and since Lauren's unconscious body wasn't turning blue or shivering with cold, we assumed it provided her a degree of insulation.

"I hope so," I murmured, carefully tucking her back in. When I pulled away, gripping my staff as my teeth worried my bottom lip, Kuwabara caught my eye and smiled.

"She'll be fine, Dani," he said, jerking his head at the woman sleeping on his back. "She didn't come ten thousand years into the future just to die of hypothermia."

I chuckled. "She used to say she'd only die if the event involved an explosion, an act of heroism that'd get her a statue, or biscotti."

He blinked. "Biscotti?"

"Yeah. She's got a bit of a sweet-tooth." I looked to the others. "So… are we just going to walk across the ice, or what?"

"It seems that that's our only option at this point," Kurama said, but rather than just start walking he turned to Hiei. Then Kurama's eyes flickered to me and then Hiei's did the same, and something unsaid flickered between them. Hiei let out a low laugh—one marked by disgust, annoyance, and odd undercurrents of regret—before turning back toward the trees.

"All of you, go on ahead," he said, voice soft as the wind rushed by and set my hair to spinning. I stared at his back with my mouth open, confused as he added: "I'll follow once you're across."

"Hey, we can't get separated!" I said, walking toward him. He spun to face me as I reached out to touch his shoulder, but something flashed in his eyes and I pulled back.

"Dani," he said, voice low and eyes blazing a very clear warning to _stay away, don't touch me, keep back_.

I ignored the look and what it meant. "Hiei—" I said, reaching again despite the way he'd seemed to gather himself up like a snake waiting to strike, and just as my fingers brushed his arm he let out a short, quiet growl. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand up, and my tattoo twinged with heat and alarm.

However, it was his words that made my alarm truly rise. "Don't touch me," he snapped, vicious and lacking any room for argument. His lips curled back over his teeth, sharp white canines on full display. "Just don't."

I froze, his startled name—"Hiei?"—surging out my mouth before he jerked himself away and stalked into the woods without a backward glance.

"…did something happen between the two of you, Dani?" Kuwabara said, sounding timid.

When I finally managed to peel my eyes away from the trees (because _what just happened what did I do why is Hiei acting like this I thought we'd finally gotten somewhere_) I turned around, feeling my lower lip tremble before I bit down on it to stop the stupid act in its tracks.

"Define 'something,'" I finally said, looking at Kurama. "What the hell was that about?"

Kurama, infuriatingly enough, shook his head and turned to face the ice-waves lapping motionlessly at the shoreline. "We'll discuss it later, Dani," he said, taking a ginger step onto the ice. It held his weight without trouble, and it wasn't slippery thanks to the dust and grime coating its solid surface. "For now, we need to move."

I didn't press him for answers, because at the moment I was too busy replaying Hiei's harsh words and fierce looks through a haze of hurt and confusion and what-the-fuck-ery. Kuwabara shot me a sympathetic look or two as I tried not to let just how offended I was show on my face (I must have failed considering how he felt the need to approach, clap a hand to my shoulder, and assure me "Hiei will come around eventually, you'll see.")

Eventually the four of us (five if you count Lauren, but I don't) went out onto the ice in a single-file line, with Kurama in the lead and Yusuke on the end. Kuwabara went behind Kurama and I went after him. The wind on the bare ice was agonizing, making all exposed skin sting and burn from the dry force of it, and I kept my hood pulled so tight around my face that all I left exposed were my eyes (and those watered with every gust and the tears froze on my temples, which was incredibly annoying but what the heck was I supposed to do about it?). The wind had a wonderful added bonus—sarcasm—of nearly knocking me off my feet more than once, and it was slow going for all of us considering that Kuwabara had to carry someone and I had enough trouble walking to slow even _his_ double weight down.

Kurama chose a rather round-about path across the ice, not going straight across but winding in and out amongst the ice formation and bergs—I wasn't sure why until he walked over a section of the ice and it gave way under his feet, and then he made us backtrack until we found a safer route.

_No wonder Kurama's leading,_ I thought. _I'd never be able to do this by myself._

It also helped that every time we veered from our course, Kurama would pull a small glob of phosphorescent algae out of a jar he carried, set it on the ice, and use his energy to grow it into an arrow-shape that pointed in the new direction we'd taken.

"Won't Seishou or Ryu be able to follow that?" Kuwabara yelled over the wind the first time Kurama did this, but Kurama just shrugged.

"Seishou can fly, and Ryu can use the squirrels with Hogosha. It's a moot point."

I was about to open my mouth to say _yeah, and Hiei needs a way to find us even if he is being a major jerk-off_, but right as the words were about to come out the wind blew in a ferocious gust, one even worse than the others I described a little while ago. Everyone braced themselves against it, hunching shoulders to minimize wind resistance, but I felt myself slide and then I fell hard on my side. I let out a shriek, gloved hands scrambling ineffectively at the ice as I tried not to get blown away and lose my grip on my staff, but before I could even fathom what was happening the wind caught me and swept me almost ten meters across the ice in a mad, slick slide.

Before I got too far, however, I slammed against something warm and solid. Yusuke had shot forward and caught me with all the expertise of a veteran hockey goalie, arms scrambling around my torso as he pulled me to my feet and shielded me from the wind with his body.

"I'm gonna stick with Dani!" he yelled as he wrapped his hand around my wrist and tugged us back toward the others. "She's gonna blow away if I don't! That OK, Kurama?"

Kurama looked at us both, eyes narrowed beneath the fringe of fur lining his coat's hood, and then he called: "The two of you together weigh less than Kuwabara and Lauren; we'll be fine!"

"Sweet!" Yusuke yelled, and we started walking again. This time, however, I walked at Yusuke's side, alternating from his left to his right whenever the wind changed direction. The going became much easier after that, and we walked in silence for a time before anything of note happened.

Well, I say 'of note' in the loosest sense, because the only thing that really happened while we crossed the ice was a conversation between me and Yusuke.

It was right after I nearly got blown away the second time that he spoke to me, raising his voice high enough to be heard over the wind. I walked in front of him since the wind was coming from his back, so I heard him well enough before the air snatched his words away.

"So what's up with you and Hiei?" he asked.

"Damned if I know!" I called over my shoulder, because after the snap-at-Dani incident I really had no clue. First we'd kissed each other and basically solidified all the stuff I had suspected lay between us, and then he acted like my touch was the most repulsive thing in the world, so what the hell was I _supposed_ to think?

"Because you two seemed cozy before we saw the Grand Mother and junk!" he said. My blood ran a little colder, and not because of the atmosphere. "All up in a tree and stuff, you know?"

"I didn't think trees were usually considered cozy," I told him, and he did not reply right away because the wind changed direction and we had to reorient ourselves. I stood to his left, and he shot me a knowing smirk.

"Birds make nests in trees, so why can't people make love nests, eh?" he joked, and I stopped walking long enough to poke him in the ribs. His thick coat, however, rendered my poke basically pointless; Yusuke just laughed at me.

"You're terrible," I said, grateful that my hood covered most of my face and obscured my blush from his oh-so-judgmental view. My ears and cheeks burned; I'm sure I'd taken on the complexion of a tomato.

Yusuke opened his mouth, grinning, to reply, but then he stopped. His eyes narrowed and his mouth pressed into a thin line, and he raised a hand to his ear, listening for something.

"Don't move," he said, voice low and dangerous.

I went rigid in alarm. "What is it, Yusuke?" I asked, _was Seishou coming or something?_, and he looked at me with an expression that said we were in for something bad, possibly bloody, and—

"I hear…" he said, and then his lips twisted. "I mean, I _don't_ hear you denying it!" His head tipped back and he let out a bark of laughter. "Oh my god, your _face_ right now! You're so _gullible_!"

My jaw dropped and I slugged him in the arm before storming forward. The wind nearly knocked me over again, but I pressed on and Yusuke trotted to catch up.

"Oh come on, Dani, it was a joke!" he said, pleading with his eyes and tone for forgiveness.

"Well it _wasn't_ funny," I snapped.

"Maybe not for you, but for me it was hysterical!" He laughed again, smiling a smile so fun-loving I couldn't help but feel my anger fade away. "I didn't mean anything by it, I swear!"

I did not reply, choosing to think about what I wanted to say before yelling: "It's just kind of confusing right now. Between me and Hiei, I mean."

He raised an eyebrow. "You two've liked each other for a while now—what's confusing about that?"

My head whipped toward him. "You mean you _knew_?" I said, because I didn't think it had been too obvious, but Yusuke just sighed, grabbed my arm, and pulled me back in front of him. The wind had changed direction again, and it blew his words right into my hood-covered ears.

"I might not be too smart," Yusuke said, "but I think I know liking someone when I see it. You two aren't exactly subtle."

Horrified, I asked: "We're not?"

"Um, duh!" Yusuke said, laughing again. "Hiei hates touching people, but he's all over you." He paused before correcting himself. "I mean, he's all over you by _his_ standards. And you tend to look at him a lot, too." He snorted. "Hell, Hiei's downright helpful when you're around. Normally he'd just laugh and tell you you're an idiot, but with you he does things without being asked, even. It's creepy. Not bad, but… creepy."

"Oh," I said, because what else was there to say?

"Yeah, _oh_," said Yusuke. Once again the wind changed, and I had to stand on his right. He smiled down at me, friendliness overriding my embarrassment long enough for me to smile back with my eyes. "You want some advice?"

I nodded, unsure of where he was going with this.

"If you want to keep you and Hiei a secret, don't tell Botan anything." He laughed out loud at that one. "She's been saying how Hiei needs to get set up with a nice girl for years. If she figures out you two are an item, she'll plan your wedding and the nursery and you'll never get any privacy ever again."

"I'll keep that in mind," I said. Then I very cautiously asked: "So, when did you, um…"

A roguish grin. "I started suspecting something back at Ryu's hotel. Was walking to the bathroom when you were getting drunk in the living room."

"You _saw_ that?" I gasped.

"'Hiei, girls don't like the boys they like to think they're _cute_!'" he simpered, trying to mimic me. "And then he carried you to your room and _aw_, isn't that just so _sweet_?"

"Screw you," I said without much conviction.

"Is that what you say to Hiei?"

I punched his arm again, appalled and blushing and unable to speak a coherent sentence. Yusuke just laughed uproariously and smacked my back right in the middle of my tattoo, and the shock of it made me let out a small scream.

"What, the tat still stings?" he asked. "Sorry, girl. Didn't mean to hurt you."

"No problem," I said, breathless and in pain, but I didn't stop walking because I could get through it, I knew I could. When I recovered, I looked at Yusuke out of the corner of my eye and said: "So, if you knew at the hotel, do you think anyone else…?"

Yusuke looked thoughtfully at the sky, which had lightened considerably and now looked like a grey blanket that had seen one too many washes. "Well," he said, "I know Kuwabara knows, if I'm reading him right, and if I know and if Kuwabara knows then Kurama sure as _hell_ knows, because nothing gets past that guy. Oh, and Genkai's gotta know. She and Hiei are actually kind of close; she's one of the only humans he's ever gotten along with."

I winced. That was basically everybody _but_ Botan!

Yusuke went on without noticing my worried face, looking pensive. "But I think the only reason I noticed was because we've been in close quarters lately, but even after the hotel-thing I wasn't going 'Oh wow, Hiei and Dani are an item' or shit like that. I just noticed you were closer to him than anyone else, except maybe for Kuwabara but he's nice to everyone so I didn't think much of that."

"Oh," I said.

"I _really_ started to think you two had something fishy going on when you, um… " He paused, blinked, then laughed so loudly it hurt my ears. "Oh _wow_, pun totally not intended, but I realized something fishy was going on when I saw you right after you turned into the fish at the temple and walked past me with your clothes all wet! Ha ha!"

I snorted. "Funny, but what made you think something, uh, fishy was going on?"

It took him a while to calm down, but when he did he said: "Hiei walked out after you, sopping wet, but he looked kind of… happy. Which is weird for him since he's a grouch and shit, but whatever—he seemed happy. Anyway, since you were soaked and he looked like someone had popped a water balloon over his head, I'd figured the two of you had been together or something and since he was all happy in that I'm-smirking-but-really-smiling-you-just-can't-tell-because-I-like-seeming-stoic or whatever…" He shrugged. "Two plus two makes a lover's quarrel, I guess." A lightbulb-moment made his eyes widen. "Speaking of which, what was up with him being all weird before we got on the ice?"

"I have no idea!" I all but wailed, frustrations running over me in a sudden tidal wave of stress. "I thought we'd actually gotten somewhere good tonight, after we kis—"

_OH SHIT._

I bit off the word 'kissed' at the last second and turned it into a hacking cough, but Yusuke's eyes widened and he stopped walking and his jaw dropped and—

"That bastard," he said. "Oh my god, that _bastard_! When did he put the moves on you? Was it in the tree and stuff, it _was_ wasn't it, I can't believe that bastard—"

"You can't tell anyone, Yusuke!" I said, grabbing his sleeve to keep him from outpacing me. "Hiei would kill me!"

"No he wouldn't, he _likes_ you!" he chortled. "Oh man, this is just hilarious. Hiei's the most asexual person I've ever met—"

My jaw dropped in disbelief. What about Hiei _wasn't_ sexual? That heat of his—

"—and what's he doing as soon as my back is turned? He's _kissing_ people! Goddamn it, I wish I coulda _seen_ that!" He leaned in close, conspiracy written all over his face in bright neon lights. "So tell me Dani, how is he? Good, bad, too much tongue, what?"

"I'm not telling you anything!" I hissed, turning on my heel to follow after Kuwabara and Kurama. The wind, however, nearly knocked me down and Yusuke had to grab me by the arms to keep me upright.

"Aw, c'mon Dani, it's just a joke!" he wheedled, helping me walk forward again. "I was only mimicking the way Botan would've reacted so you'd know just how bad telling her would be, and _oh hell_, I won't tell anyone, I promise!"

"Damn _right_, you promise!" I said, wrenching my arm out of his hand. "And you know why? Because if you _do_ tell anyone, you're right, Hiei won't kill _me_—he'll kill _you_, and slowly!"

His eyes darted to one side in reluctant acceptance of this fact. "Jeez, chill out!" he said, but without much conviction.

"Um, have you seen the weather lately?" I asked, gesturing at the ice around us. "If I chill any more I'll turn into a Yeti."

Yusuke giggled, but then his face went serious. "I won't tell anyone, Dani," he promised. "Hell, I know what'd happen if you and Hiei went public. Koenma'd pitch a fit—"

I winced. He had no idea how right he was.

"—and Botan would never give you peace again. It'd suck. New relationships don't need that much pressure."

My mouth opened, then closed. "You know, you're smarter than you think you are," I told him. "That's good advice."

"Heh, thanks." A pause. "Why do you think he seems so mad at you?"

My shoulder slumped as we trudge along, ever moving forward. "No idea. Maybe hearing about my past made him hate me." My throat tightened, a sure sign of budding tears, but I swallowed and pushed the urge back. "Maybe he thinks I've been lying to him, but I swear, Yusuke, I don't remember anything about the Bright Ones and I had no idea Lauren and my mom were involved in all this. You've gotta believe me!"

I could've hugged him when he grinned, ruffled the top of my hood, and said: "Hey, Hiei read your mind. He knows better n' any of us that you don't remember being in those pods, and if I'm a-hundred-percent sure you're innocent, then he's gotta be at least a million."

"What could I have done wrong, then?" I asked.

"I don't know, Dani. But I do know that Hiei'll come n' talk to you about it when he can. He's like that. You can't force him into anything unless he wants you to." A grin. "Though with you, maybe he'll do things he doesn't want to. He already does to an extent, and that's not something he did even with Mukuro."

I froze, looking at Yusuke with wide eyes.

"Oh, um," Yusuke said, and he suddenly looked as uncomfortable as I felt. "Mukuro is Hiei's old, uh, boss. Ask him about her; I don't know the details."

"Her?" I said, shocked, because _why hadn't I thought about Mukuro this whole time, were she and Hiei still together, what did this mean for us, why had Hiei kept her from me, what_—

Yusuke saw the panic in my eyes and hurried to fix it. "Aw shit, Dani, she's in the past, all right?" he said, pleading with me (but for what I didn't know). "Don't feel threatened! All I know is that they used to be really close, we thought they were together and stuff, but then they had a massive fight or something and I don't think he's seen her in a while, and—" He sighed, cursed, and smacked his head with his fist. "Dammit, I'm digging a deeper hole!"

"It's fine," I somehow forced myself to say. "I… I should have known I wasn't his first. That was stupid of me." I tried to smile and failed. "It's no big deal. People can date anyone they like."

He didn't buy my act (not that I was doing a great job of it to begin with). "Are you sure you're OK?" he asked.

"Yeah. Just jealous, I guess." I laughed harshly. "I keep forgetting that not everyone's like me."

"Like you?"

I looked away, biting my lower lip behind the hood. Damp fabric chafed my lips when I said: "Don't make fun of me, but I've never really been in a relationship before. This thing with Hiei… it's confusing. I've never had to deal with these sorts of things and feelings and crap before. I don't know how to handle myself in this situation."

He seemed sympathetic, and my pride silently thanked him for that. "I feel ya," he said. "Keiko's the only one I've ever been interested in. Every time she threatens to break up with me or talks about getting a new boyfriend I feel like the world's collapsing, you know?"

"I do now. Thanks, Yusuke." My breath came into my lungs with a tremble; Yusuke and I were more alike than I'd thought, it seemed. "Makes me feel better to know it's not just me."

"No prob, Dan," he said, and paused. "Can I call you that? 'Dan,' I mean. I heard Lauren do it and I like the sound of it better, so…"

He pronounced her name funny, like 'Raulen'. I supposed her name would be confusing for Japanese speakers, since they can freely interchange 'l' and 'r' sounds in their language with no difference in meaning, and if they had trouble with my simple name… Lauren's was in for a butchering.

"It's fine," I told him, mind racing as I sought to dispel future confusion. "And you can call Lauren… Ren, if you want. Isn't that a Japanese name?"

"Yeah, it is." My change of her name seemed to please him. "Ren, then. I like it. It's prettier than her real one, I think."

"If you say so," I said, glad that the conversation had shifted, and then the wind shifter direction as well. I shuffled behind Yusuke and pushed between his shoulder blades. "Let's go, OK? We're wasting energy talking."

"Sure thing," he said, grinning over his shoulder before heading resolutely after the others.

I was glad I had to stand behind him right then, so he couldn't see the look in my eyes. I'm sure, had he seen it, that the confusion, hurt, tears, and shock would have thrown him for a major loop—though it would be one only half so big as the one I had been thrown into.

_Mukuro._

The name left a foul, hot taste in my otherwise icy mouth.

* * *

It took a little over an hour to cross the ice, and when we ended up on the lake's shore (remember, we had left an island in the middle of the lake to go to the lake's true banks) it felt like heaven to get off the cold wasteland. The shore was rocky and we camped out in the lee of a boulder, huddled around one of my illusion-fires that cast real warmth. Kuwabara and I both needed rest before we got moving again, and I kept Lauren's head in my lap while Kuwabara popped his neck and back and recovered from carrying her.

"Rauren, Lauren, Raulen, whatever her name is—she's sure heavy," he complained, but in a good-natured way.

"Dan said we could call her 'Ren' for short," Yusuke said.

Kuwabara smiled. "That's better.

"She's, uh, one-hundred-and-eighty centimeters tall," I said, hoping I was calculating that correctly. "You don't get that tall and still feel like a feather."

"True," Kuwabara said, looking at Lauren as I stroked her cheek with my thumb. She was still wrapped in the cloak (Yusuke had used some string to bind it tight to her body) but her face was exposed, serene, and pale beneath her usual tan.

"Yusuke, could you take a look around?" Kurama said, and the detective didn't respond verbally. He just hopped to his feet and made a massive jump, all but flying atop the boulder we had been sitting beside.

"Something's glittering about two miles off!" he yodeled down to us. "Long thing on the horizon—probably the river?"

"Thank you, Yusuke," Kurama said, and Yusuke joined us on the ground again. "If my understanding of the geography in this region is correct, we are about parallel with the icy patch on the river." He looked to me. "It's the one we found while you slept. We would have used it to reach the Sisters had they not found us first."

My mouth went a little dry. "Do you really think we can cross it?" I asked. "There won't be any, you know, giant tentacle monster like last time?"

"It seemed fine when I found it the first time," Yusuke said, stripping off his gloves so he could run his hands together over the fire. "When's Hiei going to catch up?"

Kurama smiled. "I called for him as soon as we set up camp. He should be here—" He paused, head cocking to one side, and then he stood up and walked to the ice. He did not step onto it, but green eyes glared at the field like he could freeze it even more solid with the coldness of his demeanor.

Yusuke stared after Kurama in confusion, and then his eyes snapped open.

"Did you hear that?" he said.

My eyes rolled. "Not again, Yusuke!"

"No, I'm serious," he said, standing and jogging to Kurama's side. I gently set Lauren's head on the ground and exchange a 'What's happening?' look with Kuwabara, and together we walked to the shore as well.

"He's coming," Kurama said, and as his words fell away in the wind I heard a sharp, deep cracking sound. It echoed from the ice field and reverberated in my bones, and I was about to ask what was going on when a network of hairline cracks burst across the ice at our feet. Black water splashed up between the cracks and froze in an instant, but then more cracks broke the new ice and the process repeated itself, making the ice look like it was growing and twitching and changing and alive as it inched up the shore until it all but brushed the toes of my boots—

"Top of the rock, now!" Kurama said, and before I could protest he had picked me up and jumped to the top of the boulder. Had we delayed even an instant the ice would have covered our feet, but I hardly cared because—

"Lauren's down there!" I shrieked struggling as Kurama touched down on the rock. "Let me go, I have to get her she's going to freeze I—"

Yusuke appeared on our left, arms filled with the backpacks we'd left sitting around my forgotten fire, and just after he showed up Kuwabara did, too. I sagged against Kurama when I saw Lauren sleeping on Kuwabara's back, and with a quick apology for freaking out I pushed away from him and turned back to look at the river.

The horizon bucked in the distance, those loud cracking sounds making my ears ring as I saw the icebergs frozen amid the ice layer bob up and down like rodeo bulls. I squinted, trying to see what was going on even though it just looked like a huge, bumpy white blanket getting shaken and plucked at by unseen hands. Then, however, a touch of black caught my eye when it smudged the top of one of the icebergs, and the black jumped faster than I could follow to another iceberg, which dipped and shuddered before the black shape hit the flat part of the ice. It sped along the ground, threads of black cracks following in its wake, and then in front of the shadow a huge section of the ice fell through and disappeared into the black water beneath. I let out a little cry of alarm, but the shadow merely jumped (the ice under it fell through from the force of the leap) and hit the top of one of the icebergs.

The ice had crept forward on the shore, and with a pang of regret I felt it hit my illusion-fire and snuff it out. It started to creep up the boulder, inch by inch and menacing.

"Go Hiei GO!" Yusuke called, cupping his hands around his mouth so he could whoop and holler at full volume. "You teach 'em who's boss!"

The shadow, Hiei, didn't appear to hear as the iceberg fell beneath him, and he hit the flat ice and started running again. As he drew closer and closer to the shore I began to see the lines of his body instead of a black blob, and as I watched I realized that Hiei moved with a grace, intention, and efficiency that was, for lack of better phrasing, beautiful to behold. Every move he made was sure and smooth and fast, and when he finally did leap from an iceberg very near the shore to the boulder we were standing on, there came a great roar from the ice and many of the icebergs fell or lurched or screamed as they scraped against one another. They froze back into silence quickly enough, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from the ice for a few moments.

The sound of nothing but slow, insistent wind made my ears ring.

"Sometimes," Kurama said, softly breaking that silence, "the landscape of the Demon World will react to who walks through it. In a sense, this place is alive, and it holds a delicate balance with the fiery Salamanders who live nearby. However, ice dislikes fire and Hiei _is_ fire. He creates an imbalance with his mere presence. That is why Hiei had to remain behind." He smiled down at me, eyes comforting and regretful all at once. "You see now?"

"I think so," I murmured, slowly turning to look at Hiei. He was sitting on the boulder behind us, touching the bottoms of his shoes. The ice crusted on them melted in a shower of steam, which promptly froze again and snowed down in a fine powder. He did not look at me.

"Welcome back, buddy!" Yusuke said, walking over with a grin.

"Shut up," Hiei snapped, standing. He glared at Yusuke, and then his eyes ghosted in my direction before turning back to the detective. "If my memory serves, we have another ice field to cross. This isn't over."

"Are you rested well enough Kuwabara, Dani?" Kurama asked.

I swallowed and gripped my staff tighter. "Sure," I said, and Kuwabara hefted Lauren a little higher.

"Let's roll," he said.

And so we did.

* * *

We reached the banks of the river to discover that we weren't right next to its icy portion. We had to walk downstream for about a mile to find it, trailing in a single-file line down its banks (Hiei did not offer me his usual warmth, and that made my stomach flutter with uneasiness). None of us spoke, not that I was interested in speaking at that point—Hiei's act of ignoring me made me too edgy, hurt, and prone to tearing up to relish the idea of starting a conversation.

I'm kind of ashamed to admit how girly I was feeling, but hey, let's be honest: having your not-quite-almost-boyfriend look at you like you're a roach isn't the best feeling in the world.

Anyway, Kurama lead the way again and I walked after him. Kuwabara and Lauren walked in the center of our line, I guess so they had the most defense, and Yusuke walked behind _them_. Hiei brought up the rear, and when I looked back at him to see if maybe, _maybe_ I could get a smirk out of him or something, he either stared everywhere but at me or schooled his face into an expression befitting a dead fish. I didn't look at him more than twice, because after each rejection I felt like a million bees were stinging the inside of my stomach.

_What is his problem?_ I thought after a time, because I was tired of feeling guilty for something I didn't know I'd done and had moved on to being angry. _Screw _me_ doing something wrong, Hiei's just being a jerk!_

I had just resolved to give him the silent treatment in revenge of his own behavior when we reached a (comparatively) narrow part of the river, and on it lay the ice. To my horror, this ice seemed only half as solid as the first ice field had. After all, the behemoth of a river was a rushing beast, and though the ice seemed thick enough in the shallows it grew thinner and thinner the closer you got to the center of the stream until all there was was cold, running water.

_Oh no,_ I thought when Kurama signaled for us to stop. My anger toward Hiei abated a bit in the face of a threat to his safety. _How the hell is Hiei going to get across this?_

"Damn," Yusuke said, walking out onto the ice. The rest of us started to follow, but Hiei hung back a nice distance. "We're going to have to jump it in the middle."

My hand shot into the air. "Problem!" I chirped, voice muffled behind my hood.

"Don't sweat it, Dan—I can jump with you, I think," Yusuke said. He looked at Kurama. "Think it'll hold us both?"

"It will have to," Kurama said. "I weigh more than you, so I can't carry her. Hiei can't, either. And if you and Dani can't cross, then Kuwabara and Lauren wouldn't be able to, either."

"I could try to fly across," I offered, thinking of my bird form.

"Have you mastered flight in that form yet, Dani?" Kurama asked.

I sucked my lips into my mouth, then admitted: "Well… not really. But I could try!"

Kurama chuckled. "Thank you, but I'd rather not have you killed when we're so close to success."

"Yeah, and the last time you wanted to try using one of those weird forms of yours to get across this river, you nearly died," Kuwabara said. He jiggled around, putting Lauren higher on his back. "Kurama, you should try crossing first. If it can hold you, then Dani and Yusuke should go. If it can't hold them then it sure as hell can't hold us."

"But won't that weaken the ice?" I asked.

"It's a risk we have to take," Kurama said. "I need to find the best route across, and then we need to test it for weight."

I thought about that for a moment, and then I said: "I still think I need to take my bird form."

"Why?" Yusuke asked.

"My bones go hollow when I do it," I said. "I'll be lighter." My eyes lit up. "Ooh, ooh, I have an idea!"

"I don't know if your ideas have the best history of working, Dani," Kuwabara said, but I shushed him with a grin.

"You weigh the most, right Kuwabara?" I said. "I already weigh the least, and if I go birdy then I'll weigh even less. It makes sense for you to take me—equal balance and all."

"Yeah, and if I take Ren, I'll weigh less than you and her put together, Kuwabara!" Yusuke said, liking my idea of the gleam in his eye was any indication. He walked over to Kuwabara and started to pull Lauren off of him.

"I suppose this can work," Kurama said slowly. "But Yusuke, Ren is taller than you—will you be able to handle her?"

Yusuke had just managed to get her on his back, and though he could, apparently, handle her weight well enough, he looked dwarfed by her to some extent. "I'm OK," he said, jogging a few steps. Her legs flew everywhere, head jouncing from side to side. "Yeah, yeah, this is OK. Couldn't pull anything fancy, but running and jumping—yeah, no problem."

"Fine, then," Kurama relented at last. "But after I go and scout out our route, Ren and Yusuke should follow." He looked at me, then at Kuwabara, and he smiled. "You're right. There's no sense risking the ice making Ren and Yusuke go first, though I am sorry you must take that risk yourself."

"Aw, we can take it, can't we Dani?" Kuwabara joked, patting me on the shoulder as he came to stand at my side.

"Sure thing," I said, shooting a look at Lauren. "So long as she's safe, I'll do anything."

Kurama dipped a nod, then looked out at the river. Its low silver glitter reflected the grey sky above; everything looked drained of color, from the rocks on the pebbled shore to the white-dusted ice to the silver water snaking through the middle. Everything was grey and gross; we six living beings provided the landscape's only color, and looking at my friends gave me the strength to not cower before the task ahead.

"I'll go now," Kurama said. "I'll come back once I find a way across, then you will go, Yusuke. Kuwabara and Dani will come after, and then Hiei." He smiled, green eyes beating back the grey around us and making it look ever greyer. "Stay warm, and keep a sharp lookout."

"Will do," Yusuke said, and he sat down on the ground with a thump. Lauren's chin rested on his shoulder, and she let out a snorted snore and smiled in her sleep.

I giggled, and when I turned back to Kurama to wish him luck I saw that he had walked out across the ice, gracefully, with his hood pushed back and hair floating in the wind behind him. It was like seeing blood on snow, and a chill that had nothing to do with the sharp wind made me shiver.

"You OK?" Kuwabara asked.

I tugged the lower part of my hood down beneath my chin and smiled. "Sure," I said. "Just… nervous, I guess."

"Oh, don't be!" Kuwabara chortled. "Yusuke's the strongest fighter I've ever met and he's as fast as the wind, too, so if you're worried about Ren you should just look at his face and remember that he's—"

Kuwabara looked over his shoulder at Yusuke, who was pinching Lauren's cheek and giggling at how she didn't flinch or react or anything at all.

"Um," said Kuwabara when I raised an eyebrow. He scratched absently at the back of his neck. "Um, you wanna… sit down and make a fire, or somethin'?"

The laughter bubbled out of my mouth and shot the air like a Gatling gun. I doubled over, drunk with humor because his face had just been _hysterically_ funny, and the sheer tension of the situation made every last drop of humor precious and worth laughing at large about. When I was finished, tears of mirth frozen on my cheeks and the corners of my eyes, I straightened up and looked at the what-the-heck expression on Kuwabara's face, smiled, and said: "Let's get that fire, hm?"

We set it up by Yusuke and Lauren—well, I set it up. I told everyone to sit in a circle, and I stood in it, too, and set about making a fire with Yusuke and Kuwabara watching with muted interest.

I tried not to think about Hiei, who sat many meters away with his back to the river.

I cleared my head with a small smack to the face, the heat of the pain focusing my mind. Instead of making fire like I always had, however, I tried experimenting a little bit. I didn't close my eyes and drift into theta, not like normal, and I stripped off my gloves, gripped my staff in both hands, and visualized all of my power and energy flowing into it. I wasn't sure anything would happen, of course, since I had never done anything like that before and I wasn't really sure what I was actually _doing_, but the intensity of the results surprised me. As soon as I started pushing my power into the staff it started to vibrate and ripple against my fingers and palms, and I felt in my gut that I was creating some sort of, of, some sort of _wellspring_ of my energy in the staff.

When I gathered what I thought was enough, I did the only thing I could think of: I whistled the firesong.

The ball on top of my staff burst into flame, and then a great gout of fire rocketed out of it and hit the place in the center of our circle. I was thrown back onto the beach in a shower of pebbles, head smacking against the ground so hard I saw stars, and Yusuke and Kuwabara fell over backward and scrambled to get away. The breath got knocked out of me. I lay there gasping, hardly hearing the way Yusuke was laughing his ass off and Kuwabara kept saying 'Whoa, whoa, whoa!' over and over again, and then a shadow fell over me and I found myself staring into twins spots of brilliant grenadine.

Dazed, I mumbled: "Hi, Hiei."

"Hn," was his oh-so-eloquent (not to mention trademarked) reply, and by the time I managed to sit up he was walking away from me down the beach. I vaguely saw a nicely contained fire burning away on the beach, vaguely saw Kuwabara and Yusuke staring at me, vaguely noticed the way Lauren was lying forgotten on the ground, but for once I didn't care about making her comfortable and I lurched to my feet, woozy but indifferent as I stumbled after Hiei.

"Wait!" I said, then yelled: "Hey, WAIT!"

Hiei stopped walking, but he did not turn around.

"What's up with you, Hiei!" I called, head still swimming. "What's _wrong_?"

He started walking again.

And so I stumbled along after, half-shouting half-formed thoughts until I tripped and fell and landed hard on my knees. My staff thawed the frozen tears on my cheek, so I clutched at it and shut my eyes and tried not to cry and undo its soothing work. My head ached something fierce, my knees hurt from where I tripped, I was suddenly so tired I felt like my head was floating—

"You're an idiot."

I blearily opened my eyes. Hiei knelt in front of me, elbows braced on his knees. He was frowning, eyes narrowed and lips pursed, and he'd never looked cuter. Or was that just the bump to my head talking?

"Hi," I said, and I grinned goofily. No, it wasn't the bump. He was just nice to look at, that's all.

"You hit your head," he said, and he tugged off my hood. Then he reached out and cupped the back of my skull. I let out a little sigh when his hand blazed with sudden heat, and the pain there melted away. My eyes fell shut. Having that heat there felt right, and comforting…

It ended almost as soon as it began.

I opened my eyes when I heard feet crunching over pebbles, and the heat left me and Hiei was walking away. I stared after him, feeling blank until words fell out of my mouth without my consent: "Did I do something wrong?"

He stopped walking. Turned. The cherry of his eyes seemed to glow in the all-grey world, seemed to make the world bleach out until all there was was his eyes, staring at me, glowing with fury and—

Contrary to the set of his eyes, he claimed: "I am not angry with _you_, woman."

I took a deep breath. "Then why," I breathed, "won't you come anywhere near me, Hiei?"

He growled, lips twitched back to show off his sharp teeth.

"Don't say my name," he snapped.

"Hiei, why—"

"_Don't_!"

I went still, mouth gaping open until I felt something freeze on my tongue, and then I closed my mouth again. Hiei's hands clenched tightly at his sides, shaking as lean fingers ground into his palms, and as I watched a trail of bright red blood slicked out from between those fingers and fell in a patter to the stones beneath his feet. He wore all black, and that blood and those eyes of his made the whole world center down onto him, because he was the only thing with color and it was beautiful and I couldn't look away.

"I am _not_," he said, voice shaking with barely-contained emotion, "angry with _you_."

"Then who are you angry with?" I asked.

He did not reply, breath rushing out of his nose as his head tipped back, eyes closing. His shoulders seemed as taut as steel cable when he said: "Me."

I stared at him. His eyes opened.

"I burn because of my nature," he said, voice still shaking with that suppressed emotion I couldn't fathom. "Your touch only makes it worse."

"Hiei," I said, and he glared at me with such heat I nearly thought I'd catch fire. My tattoo came to life and screamed—

"Do not say my _name_," he hissed, eyes blazing. "Just looking at you right now is shattering what little control I have on my nature; can you at least try to make this easier on me by not calling for me in that _voice_?"

"I'm not trying to—"

"I know," he said, cutting me off. "You have no idea what you're doing." He turned on his heel again, looking back at me over one shoulder. "That's the worst part of it. Had I more time, pushing past your influence on my body would be simple." He chuckled; I burned. "Too bad, though—we don't have more time."

I took me a minute to process what he'd said, and the implications, and the mysteries. Then: "What can I do?"

Eyes closed; lips turned down at the corners. "Just don't talk to me until we're across the river," he said. "If you do, I can't promise you that I'll be able to make it across the ice at all."

When he started walking again, I didn't try to stop him. Kuwabara and Yusuke didn't look at me when I went to sit with them around the fire (I'd wandered far when I'd tripped along after Hiei) and we warmed up in silence before Kuwabara finally asked: "So did you two make up, or what?"

"… I think we made up," I admitted, and no one said anything else. There just wasn't much else to be said.

* * *

Kurama came back a little while later and proclaimed: "The way is passable, but precarious. Yusuke, take Lauren and follow me across."

I looked down at Lauren and stroked her face one last time. Yusuke came over and I helped put her on his back, and with one last caress I let him carry her away.

"We'll be fine, so quit lookin' like you're about to cry, Dan," the ex-detective said, grinning as he skipped out onto the ice. He slid a little and managed to recover. "Whoops!"

"I'm not about to cry," I snapped, which wasn't exactly true but Yusuke didn't need to know that. "Just please, don't get yourself killed!"

"Have you met me?" Yusuke asked. "I've died twice and people still can't kill me!"

I laughed. "You've beaten my record, then. I've only died once."

"That's more than enough," Yusuke said, and he began to walk away. "Just don't go chasin' after _my_ record, OK? I'd like to keep it!"

In his own awkward way, I knew that Yusuke was trying to tell me to be careful, too. I turned my back as he, Lauren, and Kurama began to cross the river, staring into the fire I'd made without expression. Kuwabara sat across from me, watching them go behind my back, and after a time he decided to speak.

"They'll be fine, really," he said.

"Everyone keeps saying so."

"They're serious. We don't want any tragedies on this trip." He paused. "So are you and Hiei really OK? You look preoccupied."

I was. I had been thinking about what Hiei said, about his lack of control and about my affect on him. Was it really all OK, if I basically made his life so damned inconvenient because of my mere presence? He hardly showed his 'lack of control' in his face at all, when my tattoo reacted with only a look from him. Was that fair? Was he exaggerating?

In the end, I said: "I think we'll be OK."

I just wasn't sure if I meant it or not, because I didn't understand anything.

Or was that just the bump on the head talking?

* * *

Before Kurama came back to guide us over the ice, I dipped into theta and pulled out the form of my bird. I clicked with it and Kuwabara let out a yelp when he saw the holes on either side of my nose and the wisps of blue feather poking out of my hood. I shrugged the garment off to let the feathers fly free, and my claws grasped my staff with a series of small clicks. I had loosened my bra straps before changing form, but I didn't take off my coat because it was far too cold to justify not smashing some of my feathers by keeping it on. Rumpled feathers I could deal with; hypothermia I could not. Anyway, I asked Kuwabara to shut his eyes when I undid my fly to release my tail, and when the wind hit my feathers I was once again overcome by the urge to fly.

I didn't, though. I didn't know how.

Not long after I finished changing was when Kurama returned.

"Did they make it?" I asked, bouncing a bit in agitation. Kuwabara had spotted Kurama coming, so we had extinguished the fire and gone to meet him before he got within shouting distance.

"They're waiting on the other side of the river," he said, but his face appeared drawn. "We need to hurry, though. Leaving them undefended put a bad taste in my mouth."

"Let's go right now, then," I said, eager to see Lauren safe at last, and I took my first step onto the ice (my taloned feet felt a little cramped in my boots, but not terribly so). Looking down revealed that reeds—reeds similar to the ones I had hidden in when I swam across the river the first time—had been frozen in the ice, making it as speckled as a Dalmatian who had rolled in ink. The ice wasn't terribly slippery, either, because it had frozen in little waves and dips that provided traction for our feet, so Kuwabara, Kurama and I were able to start moving without much trouble.

I looked back over my shoulder once. Hiei was standing, watching us go, and even though I knew he probably didn't want me to, I raised a hand in momentary farewell.

It surprised me to see him raise a hand right back.

I turned back toward the task at hand with a small smile behind my hood, and I used the warmth of Hiei's recognition to power me forward. We walked for a time, the brighter ribbon of rushing water growing ever closer, and the farther out we moved I noticed something, something buzzing and growing and shaking the ice beneath our feet. A quick look revealed that the ice appeared much darker, and I could hear water lapping at the ice ahead of us and at the ice under our feet.

"It's getting thinner," Kurama said, raising a hand so we'd stop behind him. "We jump from here."

I stared forward and swallowed, nervous, because open water lay about fifteen feet ahead. The stream of it was also fifteen or so feet across, and could Kuwabara jump that far with me on his back?

"I think I can make that if I pull out my good old spirit sword," Kuwabara said slowly. He smiled at me, but I could see the nerves in his look. "Let's back up a bit."

I nodded. "Sure."

What happened next was basically every Kuwabara-fangirl's dream. Kurama marked the farthest place on the ice it was safe to walk on, and Kuwabara helped me climb up on his back ("Dude, you hardly weigh a thing!" he told me). When I was settled, staff tucked into my backpack's straps and clawed hands hooked into the front of Kuwabara's shirt, he held out his right hand, took a deep breath, and willed his spirit sword into being.

It was my first time seeing it, and let me tell you that it's actually rather pretty. I mean really, _really_ pretty. I couldn't tell if it was his dimension-cutting sword or if it was just a normal one, but the golden plume of energy burned white-hot in the center and made the air around it sparkle nonetheless, and oh wow, my music didn't look half so cool next to it. His fingers clenched tight around the light like it had physical weight, and after nodding at Kurama and smiling at me, Kuwabara started to run. I held on as tight as I could, teeth grit as I bounced around and the wind rushed by (my avian eyes did not dry out, thank god), and a few long paces before we reached the spot on the ice Kurama had marked as 'safe', Kuwabara opened his mouth and yelled: "SPIRIT SWORD, GET LONG!"

The sword shot up and out of his hand like a bottlerocket, and with a bellow of effort Kuwabara plunged the sword's tip down into the ice ten feet ahead of us. It bent in a gentle 'c' shape as he ran a few more paces, the 'c' growing less and less gentle with every step, and then it lifted us off the ground and for one terrifying moment we were _flying_, arcing up and over the water as Kurama watched us through narrow green eyes that flashed next to the grey ice—

Cold water splashed my face, and we barely missed falling in when we hit the ice on the other side of the river. We came apart on impact, sliding across the slick ice and away from the river, and somehow Kuwabara managed to grab hold of my wrist so we didn't get entirely separated. Panting from fear and triumph and the jar of hitting the cold ice, I struggled to my hands and knees as Kuwabara did the same.

"We made it!" he said, elated. "We made it, Dani!"

"Ten points for execution!" a familiar voice bellowed, words thin and far away. "Two for landing! Ya need to work on that, Kuwabara!"

"Oh shut up, Urameshi!" Kuwabara yelled back, glaring the shoreline. A small waving figure—Yusuke, of course—flipped us off, and Kuwabara said: "You punk!"

"Get your asses over here!" Yusuke yelled. "C'mon! I want a fire!"

"Coming up!" I called, using my vocal training to project louder than Yusuke and Kuwabara could ever hope to, and when I looked at Kuwabara he had dropped his jaw. "Voice lessons," I said by way of explanation, and I shut my eyes long enough to let go of my bird form. Pants sagged around my hips when my tail retracted, but I fixed them when I stood up.

"Hiei and I will be along shortly!" Kurama called. I turned; he was waving across the water, and after an exchanged grin he marched back the way we'd come.

"Let's go," Kuwabara said, and we slid and skittered across the pock-marked ice toward Yusuke. It took a little while to reach him, but when we did we collapsed on the shore. Yusuke urged me to my feet so I could build another fire, and I had just finished up and settled Lauren's head in my lap when Kuwabara let out a low whistle.

"Kurama jumped that good," he said, and we watched the redhead run across the ice like some sort of mutant gazelle. He skidded to a stop next to us and immediately looked back at the ice.

"Hiei's coming," he said.

My heart leapt into my mouth, and I put my hands on either side of Lauren's face to calm myself. I could barely see Hiei's black figure through the glare coming off the water and ice, but I tracked it as best I could—not that it was hard. Hiei didn't try clearing the ice with any fancy maneuvering or flips like he'd done on the first ice field; he just ran flat out, straight ahead, almost too fast for me to follow, and in his wake came thousands of sharp cracking sounds. The ice buckled and caved in behind him. He jumped when he got near the water and soared across, landing lightly on his heels before rocketing ahead once more, and almost immediately the ice started to fall away behind him. I'm not sure how he managed to beat it to the shore, but he slammed onto the rocks in a black blur that didn't look anything like Hiei until it froze quite still some twenty yards behind us, chest rising and falling with quick breath and eyes that said triumph and satisfaction and buried relief. Chunks of white ice bobbed in the black water before slowly freezing back into place, erasing marks of Hiei's passage as if he had never been.

"Good going, man!" Yusuke said, walking over to clap the fire apparition on the back."You're getting to be a real pro at this."

Hiei recoiled, taking a step to the side to avoid further contact. "Too bad I don't want to have to do it again," Hiei growled, and he looked at me for a second.

I smiled, heart fluttering. "We're just glad you're back," I said softly, and he held my eyes before looking to Kurama.

"We need to get to the forest. There's movement behind us."

Tension broke over us in a wave, all joviality gone in a nanosecond. Kuwabara dashed toward me and together we put Lauren on his back, tying her hands around his neck with my own shaking ones as he adjusted her knees over his elbows. Yusuke had to shoulder both his and Kuwabara's backpacks but he did not complain, and he even held mine when I threw it at him so I could concentrate on snuffing out my illusion-fire—shivers set in as soon as it was gone, because on this side of the river it was even colder. Once I was done I grabbed the pack and put it on, readying my staff for the long walk.

"Where to now?" I asked, fighting back the urge to let my teeth chatter.

Kurama pointed away from the river, downstream. "The forest is that way, and the gate to Human World is inside." He paused, looking me up and down. "But we need speed. Dani, you will have to be carried."

A beat of stillness, and then I stuttered: "Oh, um…" I looked at Yusuke. "Are you—"

"I'll do it," said Hiei, and the next thing I knew I had been scooped up in warm arms that banished my chill within an instant. I yelped, trying not to hit Hiei in the face with my staff because it was a bit too long for us both, and he swatted it away as he said: "Arms around me, now."

I did as told, shifting my staff to behind him and out of his way as I twined my arms around his neck. He had one hand around my back and another beneath my knees, but I didn't seem to slow him down as he turned on his heel and started to pelt out across the plains.

I closed my eyes, cuddling closer to him to both keep warm in the newly-rushing wind and to keep from falling to my unfortunate (second) death. Shouts from the others let me know we were being followed, and I cracked my eyes open to catch a sickening glimpse of the world rushing by. We were back on the hilly plains outside the forest, the same ones we had crossed to reach the river the first time, so I didn't feel like I was missing anything too important by keeping my eyes squeezed tightly shut.

After a minute or so, shouts of "Wait, Hiei, slow down!" faded behind us.

Hiei didn't try to talk to me and I didn't try to talk to him until shadows started flickering on the inside of my eyelids, and then Hiei's sprint slowed to a deliberate, long lope. I opened my eyes to find us surrounded by greenery and velvet darkness, and I was about to say that we should stop and wait for the others when Hiei stood still. The arm under my knees eased me slowly to my feet, and I was about to take my arms off of his neck when his hands caught my elbows and held them there. He twisted me, face to face for an instant before he bent his head and kissed me, and this kiss was everything that first one was not: all heat, urgency, sex, and dominance that made my tattoo start shrieking in response, flooding me with heat and electricity. I gasped against his mouth and his hands pressed tight into my back, fingers twisting my coat so I pulled flush up against him and he growled at the contact, chest rumbling low and deep and hot, and he used _everything_ to kiss me, all teeth and lips and tongue and nothing went untouched, untasted—

I couldn't breathe and my lips stung like honey when he pulled back, but he did not pull away entirely because instead his face dipped low, lips skimming along my jaw line with breath hissing over skin, and my knees gave out but luckily he seemed furiously against letting me go. I slumped and moaned when his mouth ghosted over my ear, breath and heat making my hair stand on end and my skin simmer, and then his head dipped lower and his mouth fastened on the juncture of my jaw and throat, boiling hot and wet, and then he slid even lower and a hand came up to shove my bandages to one side so he could get at more skin—

Hiei froze, heat dissipating in little more than a snapped second. I could hear my gasps in the air because that was all I could manage to do right then, but as soon as he spoke I knew—I _knew—_that something was undeniably wrong. Hands clamped around my biceps cruelly, pushing me away until we were nose to nose and his eyeteeth glinted with scarcely-contained rage.

"What," he said, cherry eyes ablaze, "is _that_?"

"What's what?" I somehow said, voice breathy, and Hiei went nuts.

"The _thing_ on your _neck_!" he roared, uncaring that he was so close my eardrums rang from the force of his words. I'd never seen him so angry, had never seen him look like he was about to combust and take the whole world down with him. _"What is it, Dani!"_

"Ryu gave it to me!" I gasped. Hiei's eyes snapped open wider than I'd ever seen, and I said: "He tried to bite me, but, but my tattoo, it hurt him when he tried and that's how I got away, I—"

He let go of one of my arms so he could grab my jaw, force my head to one side, and stare at my exposed neck… no, not at my neck, at the _bite_ on my neck. He was still snarling, still livid, but not at me anymore.

"Damn him," he said. "_Damn_ that bastard of a psychic. _Damn him!"_

"Hiei," I started to say, but he didn't let me finish and instead jerked my face forward so he could kiss me again, once.

"Not now," he growled against my lips, and then he pushed me away and turned his back. "Cover that. I don't want to see it."

"What did I do?" I said, tugging the bandages into place again. "What did Ryu—"

"_There_ you are!" Yusuke called, and the others burst out of the underbrush. "We gotta go, guys, we saw Seishou coming this way—"

"Shit," I said—what else was I supposed to say?—and then Hiei picked me up again. We started running through the trees for a few minutes, and then Kurama shouted for us to stop and we skidded on the cold ground. Hiei put me down, and when my eyes opened I saw that Kurama had knelt and pulled a small ball made of clear glass out of his bag. His hand glowed with green energy, igniting the ball from within, and then he lobbed it at the air in front of him. It shattered on nothing and trickled down in a rain of green sparks, sparks that coalesced into an oval six feet tall and three feet wide. It shimmered in the air, beckoning and unknowable.

"Home again, home again!" Kuwabara said, and he tipped us a wink before walking into the oval. He and Lauren vanished in a flash (relief made my stomach churn; Lauren was safe at last!), and Hiei pushed me forward to follow after.

Of course, that's when a voice from behind us thundered: "Give the Bright Lady to me, Spirit World dogs."

I spun, only a few feet from the oval but feeling more exposed than ever when I saw Seishou standing between two trees a dozen meters behind us, black cloak flowing out along the ground and cold metal mask betraying nothing of his emotion or face. He looked like Death itself, a grim reaper Botan in all her candied glory could never hope to rival, and his voice sapped me of my strength with a single syllable.

Yusuke didn't seem as affected by it, though, when he stepped forward, punching a fist into his open hand. "Too bad—she's long gone," he said, grinning. "How about taking me to the prom instead?"

Seishou's head inclined a little. "That gateway is still open," he said. "They won't close it without you going through, either."

"Yeah, but you'll have to go through us to get to it, now won't you?" Yusuke quipped. "Get ready, buddy. I've been wanting to tear into you for a long time."

"No, Yusuke," Hiei said, stepping between Yusuke and Seishou. "I will handle him."

My heart all but stopped. "Hiei, NO!" I shouted, lunging to go to him, but Kurama held out an arm and caught me in my tracks.

"He'll be fine, Dani," Kurama said, and I caught a smiling flash of bright green eyes just before his hands caught my shoulders and pushed me, really _shoved_ me, and—

—and I fell straight through the green gateway, sparks swarming over my last glimpse of Hiei and the others standing strong before the devil himself, and then my back hit something solid and I gasped, because above me was a bright blue sky and white clouds and warm, gentle wind and—

"Dani!" Botan cried, helping me sit up. She stripped the pack off my back and laughed aloud, giddy with excitement and relief, and—

"The others are still in there!" I said… well, screamed. I got to my knees and used my staff to move back toward the portal, which was floating in the middle of Genkai's courtyard (it felt like I was dreaming when I saw it again) and just as I neared it, about to go back through to find the others and bring them _home_, dammit, Yusuke and Kurama jumped out of it and landed gracefully on their feet.

"Where's Hiei?" I demanded when he didn't follow after. Yusuke and Kurama exchanged looks, silent and grim, and I said: "Where the _fuck_ is Hiei?"

"Fighting," Yusuke said simply. "He's fighting."

My panicked head assumed the worst: _Hiei's gone suicidal, we can't be together, it's all my fault and he's mad and he's doing it to get back at me_—

"_No_!" I screamed, lunging for the gate, but Kurama held me back. Desperation made summoning a surge of discordant music easy, and I let it burst out of me in a barrage of horrible sound. Kurama recoiled, crying out with shocked pain, and I slipped past him and hit the green portal with a slam.

Demon World welcomed me back with open arms and a rush of cold air and darkness, and with a 'whump' I landed on my belly on the leaf-strewn forest ground. I heard voices, but I was dazed and I couldn't understand them, so I just got to my hands and knees and looked up. Hiei stood just where I'd left him, only he'd cast his coat off to one side and his bare arm glowed with a black power the forest's green-velvet darkness could not rival. Everything seemed to get drawn into the shadow-light on his right arm, a shadow-light that glowed just as much as it simmered and jumped with dark violet sparks, and as I watched I saw an even darker blackness twined around his arm in a spiral at the core of the strange glow, the dragon-shape bursting out of Hiei's skin with a spray of blood before growing scales and claws and hunger and malice and coming to full life. It writhed and twitched and roared around him, eagerness for blood creating a wind that whipped through the clearing in a searing hot wave that melted the snow on the ground and made it boil.

"Dragon," Hiei said, and then he raised his hand, legs braced far apart and strong, and he bellowed: "DRAGON OF THE DARKNESS FLAME!"

The dragon roared into life, rearing its head back above Hiei with its great violet eye dominating everything in my vision, even though the dark around it threatened to tear my sight apart for forever, but the eye passed over me—_my tattoo, it seemed to sing and burble, why did it do that?—_and then it locked on the one thing that could, possibly, contend with its darkness.

Seishou.

The dragon roared again and shot forward, burning trees to a crisp and igniting the forest around us with bright orange flames of very real fire. But the black fire made the real fire seem pale and weak as it surrounded Seishou, forcing him backward and plunging him into the burning woods, and then the black streamed into the orange flames and out of sight.

Before me, Hiei fell to his knees.

I went to him without a care, not thinking about the forest-on-fire or the dragon-on-the-loose when I knelt at his side and tried to tug him to his feet. "Grab my staff, walk with me, Hiei, please, I can't lose you, not now, please," I babbled, and his eyes met mine and they reflected the fire all around us—

He touched my staff, took it in his hand, pulled himself to his feet as the staff thrummed and sang and called to me, called me to go after the Dragon amid the flames or the Dragon standing at my side, but I didn't listen to the Salamander's siren call and just concentrated on chanting to Hiei, "Just walk, just walk with me, please, let's just go, he's gone, he's gone, he's—"

Green sparks clouded my vision, and then I saw blue sky, red eyes closing, and light.

And after that, darkness.

* * *

NOTES:

_HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FUTURE TALK! HERE'S A CLIFFY TO CELEBRATE! _

_This chapter and this day (January 10__th__) mark this story's one year anniversary. (*blows a party horn and tosses confetti*) Cake, anyone? It's hard to imagine that Dani died a year ago today, and it's even harder to imagine that I've been updating every single week for an entire year, but hey, this experience has been an amazing one. Thanks for sticking with me for so long, guys! You are all PHENOMENAL!_

_Anyway, yeah, action goodness with a little fluff. Good combo after last week's talking-chapter? I hope you liked it! _

_For some reason, whenever I talked about Kurama on the ice I thought about Legolas walking on top of the snow in _The Lord of the Rings_. Pretty, long haired, graceful, impervious to weather conditions… COINCIDENCE?_

_And we saw several new pieces of artwork this week—birthday gifts! Yay! LupinePhyre909 drew Dani freaking out over bad fanfiction AND Hiei and Dani together, and Tokyo Time Killer drew Dani looking super cute! _

_Also, I drew Lauren. Twice. Check out the devianART!_

_This is a very special thank-you session, because most of you have been with this story for the entire year of its life. So THANK YOU, because today of all days reminds me of just how much I love you all. I owe you all major favors. spiritfoxxx821, WorldsAngel, Angel of Randomosity, yumchaitea, Koryu Elric, DoilyRox, Dragon of Twilight, Kaiya's Watergarden, WishingWanderer, chocolateluvr13, j.d.y., MusicFiend666, TallyYoungblood, Kai-Chan94, DaAmazingMeepers, Willowleaf2560, mangotai, Mihakuu, Dreamehz, etowa-ru, Reclun, ephermal violet, LadyxAbsinthe, colbub, Wings of Silver Rain, Zetsubel, itsallaboutbob, AkaMizu-chan, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares, Foxgirl Ray, Akari Tsubasa, heve-chan, sicklemoon13, Yoko Kiara14, Anon, loser94, Reality Bores Me, rain chant, dude where's my spirit gun, The Tokyo Time Killer, Destinyswindow, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Supreme Baka, ShadowFireFox13_


	54. Chapter 54: Boats & Birds

Future Talk

Chapter 54:

"Boats & Birds"

* * *

Her impossible bulk filled everything. Red skin covered in a thin white skein glowed a little in the otherwise pitch-dark, and as I stared up into her orange-white eye she bared her teeth at me. They glittered like curved rubies, and the claws that tipped her powerfully muscled paws reflected the same bloody light.

She was a beautiful thing, my Salamander. Beautiful and deadly and full of ferocity I could hardly hope to contain.

"Hello," I told her. "I'm Dani."

Her head dipped low, the single eye that was as long as my entire body dropping even with myself. I stared into that eye as she stared into mine, and for one moment we just looked at each other in an assessing manner.

Then, very slowly, smooth lips closed over her teeth.

"You're the one in my tattoo," I said to fill the silence. It seemed impossible for something so large to make no sound, but even as the long coils of her body twined over themselves the silence stretched unbroken all around. "Me and you—we're bound together now, aren't we?"

Her aquiline head rose a little; the tip of her arrow-point muzzle hovered just above me. I reached up and gently laid my hand underneath her lower jaw, feeling the boiling heat simmering under her cool skin and the smoothness of her flesh. She felt like a snake, resonating all over with silkiness and hidden muscle.

"You're beautiful," I told her, and then my heart clenched. My next words were whispered.

"I… I killed you."

Her head recoiled with a soundless jerk, and then her jaw split wide. Crystalline spittle streamed between her jaws and through her teeth when she roared in my face, blasting me with heat and rage and enough sheer volume to send me skittering backward a step—only I didn't skitter, because my feet were both whole and my improved balance kept me upright, and even though they should have, my eyes didn't dry out when the hot air of her gut streamed into them. I withstood her cries without blinking, allowing her to bellow out her rage and pain and sadness for what must have been hours. Her long body shook and writhed and lashed, her claws slashed at the invisible ground, her teeth snapped inches from my face, and all through it she roared as if the world was ending.

Eventually, though, she fell quiet, staring at me with that agonized, baleful eye of hers, and when her lips closed back over her teeth I reached out once again and caressed her hot-cold snout.

"I'm sorry," I told her, and I meant it. "I'm _so sorry_. But…" I forced a smile. "We're together now, sister. I'll take care of you, just like you took care of me."

Her head tilted imperceptibly to one side, and was it just me or did my Salamander look… confused?

"You saved me earlier," I said. "Remember? That guy, Ryu—when he bit me, you…"

Her slits of nostrils puckered when she snorted, hot air wafting into my face with the scent of boiled stone. Obviously she remembered, and even more obviously she didn't like thinking about it. I'm not sure how I knew that was how she felt (her features weren't exactly readable) but nevertheless I understood.

"Yeah, that wasn't too nice of him," I agreed, because something about the set of her eye told me that she didn't like Ryu very much. "And yeah, you're right, I don't like Ryu like that. Totally not my type." I let out a low laugh, feeling a cold spot I didn't want to think about twinge below my breastbone. "I like my men with fouler tempers, I guess."

Her nose pushed past my hand gently, and inch by inch she lowered it under its pointed tip touched my forehead. I held my breath as her breath stirred my hair, but then I started smiling when a spear of warm comfort burrowed into my head, delving deep inside from the point where she touched skin to hide. The spear spread until it suffused my body in a cocoon of connection, and then the heat in my head began to coalesce into a shape. It didn't take long for it to form a pair of intent red eyes and a shock of blue-black hair, and as tanned skin fleshed out his face I let out a small chuckle. The image had been swathed in approval and dark, sensuous satisfaction.

Her message was clear: _Is _he_ more your type, then?_

I couldn't help but laugh. "Oh, that one's Hiei," I said, touching her jaw again. I dragged my fingers down it and she purred with a sound like happy earthquakes. "And yes, I suppose he is my type. Certainly has the temper for it." I suddenly felt anxious for her approval. "Do _you_ like him?"

A new image formed around Hiei's face, a roiling mass of dark scales and hot violet wrath. The Dragon's crimson eye burned almost as passionately as Hiei's grenadine ones did.

"Oh," I said. "I _see_. You like his _Dragon_, huh?"

Her muzzle pulled back but the warmth stayed in my head and I felt her consciousness ripple with consent. She lowered her massive body into a pose reminiscent of a cat, legs tucked under and tail curled around her body, and she laid her head down on the ground, long neck making an 's' shape between her shoulders and skull. Even in this position I felt dwarfed because I was only on level with her eye even when she pressed close to the floor, but I wasn't intimidated when I walked forward to place both my hands on her muzzle. Breath blasted me through her nostrils and I sneezed; from her distant torso came the bone-shaking rumble of something that sounded like a laugh.

"Hey, don't make fun of me," I said crossly. "Not _all_ of us can be impervious to weather conditions and temperature changes."

I swear she rolled her eye. The warmth of our connection pinged lightly, reminding me of our shared images of Hiei and the Black Dragon. I smiled when I saw Hiei, unable to help the soft emotions that broke over me at the sight of those cherry eyes.

The Salamander burbled in happy sympathy; I knew she could feel my emotions just as easily as I could feel hers. The unabashed trust shared between girls sharing gossip on their crushes made my smile widen.

"I like Hiei a lot," I confided. "He's a real jerk most of the time, and when he's not being a jerk he's awfully confusing, but otherwise…" I trailed off with a blush. The Salamander burbled again, sounding a lot like an overgrown canary. "Well, I'm glad you like him, too."

The Dragon-image burned a bit brighter, making Hiei's face pale.

"I'm glad you like the _Dragon_, then," I said, giving her an affectionate smack on the nose. "But don't the two of them kind of go hand in hand?"

I felt her hesitate, and then Hiei and the Dragon fell apart in my head. The shreds of their images turned into an image of myself, or, more specifically, an image of my back and the tattoo burned into it. It was my first time seeing my mark, actually, and in my head I stared to take it all in: a circle between my shoulder blades seemed to glow like a crystal ball, and wings detailed with feathers branched off of it. The wing on the left curved downward, almost as if it were trying to lend extra support to my left arm and, by extension, my cane and the deformed foot it aided. The wing on the right curved upward like it longed to take flight, and the unbalanced affect looked like an avian yin-yang, or something.

My Salamander snorted into my hand, drawing me back on topic. The image of my back and tattoo burned a little sharper, and then next to it I saw an arm—Hiei's arm, if I knew the scars and the skin and the muscles as well as I thought I did, and then to alleviate all doubt I saw his skin bubble and burst, the Dragon cutting and burning its way out of him on its path to violent existence.

"Hiei and the Dragon," I said slowly, "are… well, they're like you and me, aren't they?"

She rumbled her agreement.

"Hiei took the Dragon into his body?"

Another rumble.

"And the Dragon can give him power?"

A third rumble; she seemed pleased that I'd put it all together so quickly.

I took a moment to process everything, fitting it together with my knowledge of Yu Yu Hakusho canon with little success. The Black Dragon had been given little explanation in the series: Zeru, the first person Hiei had ever used the Dragon on, had seemed to treat it like a separate entity one could only master via the use of a Jagan, but everyone after that bout of the Dark Tournament had treated the Dragon like a mere extension of the Jagan and not a separate entity at all, so…

_So screw the canon,_ I thought. _It's not like it's ever been useful to me, anyway._

Thinking on it some more, a new thought struck me. I couldn't help but frown. "Only, Hiei and the Dragon—they're not friends, are they?" I asked, stroking my Salamander. "Not like us?"

She hesitated.

"You wouldn't rip out of my skin like that if you could help it," I reasoned. "When you attacked Ryu, you were very gentle with me. If Hiei and the Dragon were friends, it wouldn't have to tear itself out of his arm like that."

She hesitated again, then made a noise of admittance deep in her throat.

"Well, that sucks for them," I said. Then, teasingly: "Maybe we should give the boys some pointers on playing nice?"

She chuckle-rumbled, but barely. Her eye pinched closed when she sighed; I felt sadness shudder in my head.

"You want them to be friends, don't you?" I asked softly, stroking her nose to soothe her.

Her eye cracked open.

"I do, too," I said. "It must be hard to have something inside you that you can't control. I'm lucky you turned out to be so sweet." I looked away, sheepish. "I don't know what I was expecting out of all this. I mean, they told me that the tattoo would hold the soul of a Salamander, but I never thought I'd get to _talk_ to you, you know?"

My Salamander's nose butted my hand, knocking me back a step. Her expression seemed stern.

"Hey, the Sisters didn't tell me much," I said in my defense. "Is there anything special I'm supposed to do?"

Her response was a vague feeling of incredulousness mixed with _I-don't-know-,-I'm-new-at-this_. A snort set my hair to tossing above my head, and when it fell back down and hit my breasts I realized that I was very much naked.

That revelation, for whatever reason, didn't bother me the way it normally would. I guess I just felt safe around my Salamander.

"I suppose neither of us has ever done this before, then," I said. "But we'll figure it out together. I know we can do it."

The mental equivalent of her understanding smile made me giggle, but then I paused before asking: "Can you tell me your name?"

Puzzlement. That's all I felt.

"Your name. You know…" I gestured at myself. "I'm Dani. Who are _you_?"

More puzzlement.

"What can I call you?" I persisted. "Not just 'hey, you', right? And I feel like calling you 'my Salamander' twenty-four-seven'll get pretty old pretty fast. So… a name." I stared at her, but she still didn't get it. "Something I can call you, and you alone?"

Her shoulders bobbed many yards behind her head; it took me a second to recognize the motion as a shrug, and when I did I frowned.

"So you don't have a name, huh," I said. "Well, that's great." I paused. "Can I give you one?"

Another shrug, but I felt a small spark of excitement light up the heat in my head. She wanted a name, now that I'd talked about giving her one—and that was sort of cute, in an overgrown puppy kind of way.

"Sweet!" I said in triumph, grinning, but before I could wrack my brain for names she picked up the word 'sweet' and starting tossing it around in our shared head-space, illuminating everything up with repeats of the word in my happy voice. _Sweet sweet sweet sweet sweet—_

"Wait, wait!" I said, horrified and laughing all at once. "That's not what I wanted to name you, it's an expression, listen—"

My Salamander was having none of that, however, and she continued to throw the word around with glee. _Sweet sweet sweet sweet sweet—_her tone was a mix of petulance and insistence and pleasure, because she obviously liked the word a lot for whatever unnamable reason.

"Fine, fine, have it your way!" I finally cut in, and she raised her head to let loose a volley of high-pitched chirps that reminded me of a flock of particularly vocal finches. "'Sweet' it is. Happy?"

_Very,_ she seemed to say as she settled back down (she certainly felt smug enough).

"So we're Dani and Sweet," I said, tasting the names together. "Huh. I kind of like that."

So did Sweet, apparently, because she scooted her face closer and nuzzled my sternum with another bird-chirp-burble-thing. Air blasted my chest, tickling me, and I pushed her back with a laugh.

"Settle down, Sweet," I told her. She blinked at me innocently, and I was about to ask her what else we were supposed to do when her white-gold eye shifted away from me. She nudged me back and raised her head, lips pulling back to show off her garnet fangs.

I spun, alarmed, but all that lay behind me was blackness. A small red light in the dark, however, blinked into existence a second later, and the darkness crept back to reveal a figure lying on the ground some distance away. I shrank into Sweet's shadow in alarm, but then I saw the red staff and the black hair and—

"Hiei," I said, and I ran to him on my spirit's whole legs. Sweet flowed along after me, and as I knelt at Hiei's side she surrounded us with her coils, head dipping in close so she could watch the proceedings with her single protective eye. Hiei lay on his stomach, right hand clenched tight around my bone-staff, and the arm connected to the hand was covered with blood. I carefully put my hands beneath his shoulder and rolled him onto his back, watching in horror as his head flopped atop his neck with the bonelessness of—

"Please be sleeping, please don't be dead, please be sleeping," I chanted as I pressed my ear to his chest. His heat hit me in a dizzying wave (Sweet growled above us) but I pushed the warmth aside until I felt the rise and fall of his breathing chest under my skull. I sat up with a relieved sigh; Sweet's head lowered until her muzzle brushed my hair, and I snaked my arm up so I could touch her for support.

"Why is Hiei here?" I asked aloud. "I thought we were in my mind, or something." Alarm made me look up at Sweet with a start. "This isn't a dream, is it?"

She snorted, and in my head came the image of my staff. I looked down at Hiei, frowning, because why did he have my staff, anyway? And how did he have it in my head, no less?

"You don't think that, you know, because he's touching it in the real world, he can get inside my head?" I asked.

Sweet seemed to think so, if her thrum of recognition meant anything. I stroked her skin absently while I stared at Hiei, and then, to my relief, I heard him moan. Eyelashes fluttered on his cheek, then parted to show cherry swimming with surprised disorientation.

"Dani?" he rasped, staring at me like he couldn't quite believe what he was seeing, and I smiled. Sweet nudged at the back of my head, our emotional link resonating with a brief farewell, so I dropped my hand and reached out to touch the staff still clasped in his strong fingers. It just seemed like the right thing to do, and since Sweet approved…

"We need to get out of here, I think," I said gently, and as soon as I touched my staff the blackness rushed back in.

* * *

Something cool and dry touched my cheek, and when I looked I saw a shadow looming above my head. I tried to sit up, blinking through a haze of sleep and the throb of a massive headache, but firm hands pushed me down onto something soft.

"Awake at last, are we?" said a scratchy voice—Genkai, I realized when I got used to the harsh light shining in my face and saw her hovering over.

"Where am I?" came my gummy reply. I wanted to put my hands to my face, but as soon as I tried I realized that my left one was caught under something and that my fingers, come to think of it, felt like they had steel rods running through the joints.

"You should probably let go sometime soon," Genkai said dryly. "Your fingers are turning blue."

_Wait, what? _I thought, and I made to figure out what she meant.

That time no one stopped me when I tried sitting up, and once I managed to open my eyes all the way I took a good look around. We were in my room, which was weird I guess because it looked so normal with the rocking horse and shelves of knickknacks and clothes and whatnot…

Weirder, though, was that three futons had been dragged in and lain side-by-side in the tiny closet of a space. I was on the middle one; Lauren lay to my right on her back. She looked so serene, with her halo of gold hair spread out along the pillow and her face relaxing quietly with sleep… someone had taken the Grand Mother's cloak off of her and covered her with a blanket, but otherwise she seemed untouched.

_Thank God,_ I thought, smiling a little as I looked at her, and then I turned to my left.

Hiei lay on his back beside me. His face was turned my way and was covered in sweat, teeth grit and eyes screwed up so tight his forehead looked as crumpled as abused paper, and his right arm—the one with the ravaged skin and bloody wounds in the outline of a dragon—ended with a hand clamped tight around my staff. Muscles chorded in his forearm; veins stood out in his wrist, throbbing with pent-up blood; his fingers looked like they were about to shatter against the immoveable walking stick. My left hand clenched the staff a few inches below his own, and Genkai had been right when she said my fingers were turning blue. I practically had to peel myself off of the staff, finger by finger, joint by joint, and each motion was extremely painful and preternaturally stiff. My bones felt as brittle as glass.

"What happened?" I asked Genkai while I tried to pry my hand off the staff. She stood leaning against the wall by the door, watching me work through dispassionate eyes.

"I take it Demon World put a jump-start on your relationship with Hiei," she said bluntly.

I clenched my newly-freed fist against my chest, not looking at her while I blushed and tried to flex blood back into my hand.

"I'll take that as a yes," she said evenly.

"Did Yusuke say something?" I asked, staring at Hiei's hand on the staff. _If my fingers hurt, his must be…_

Genkai snorted. "No. Your actions spoke loudly enough."

I looked at her finally, confused, and her wrinkled mouth twisted with a smirk. "Dashing headlong into Demon World, Dani? If you wanted subtlety, you went looking in the wrong place." A harsh laugh. "Kurama's still nursing his wounds."

I vaguely remembered lashing out at Kurama before jumping in after Hiei, but the memory was a fuzzy one. "How badly did I hurt him?" I asked, worried. "I didn't mean to hurt him, I swear!"

"If Yukina hadn't been here, he would have needed stitches," Genkai said. "Though for people like us, that's just a paper cut. You startled him more than you hurt him, I think. None us knew you could attack someone."

"I'm not sure what I did," I admitted, thinking about it. I had attacked Hogosha in much the same way, using destructive discords to hurt my aggressors, but neither attack had possessed much by way of strength or control…

How had I even done it, come to think of it? I certainly hadn't been in my right mind during either attempt.

Genkai was studying Hiei with a critical eye. "The two of you collapsed when you came through the rift," she said, eyes on the staff. "Neither of you would let go of that new toy of yours. It was a real bitch, carrying you inside. And we couldn't treat Hiei's arm, either. Too stressed." She looked at me without expression. "I was hoping he'd let go if _you_ did, but no such luck."

"Why would you hope that?" I asked.

She snorted. "Why do you think?" When I gave no signs of recognition, she said: "He grabbed the staff to stay close to _you_, idiot. Any fool could see that."

I felt very small when I said "Oh," and I licked my lips. Then I asked: "Where is everyone?"

"Sleeping, mostly. You've been asleep for a good two hours now."

I processed that. "And did anyone think to tell you about… what happened in Demon World?" I asked.

"I've been informed of the basics," Genkai said dismissively. "We'll discuss everything at length later. Right now, though, I'm more worried about Hiei. He'll lose that arm if this keeps up."

I had finally managed to get feeling in my fingers again, and alarm made my palms go slick with sweat. "Yukina couldn't, I don't know, _heal him_ into letting go?" I asked fretfully, staring at his sweating face and taut-as-a-steel-cable arm. His fingers had gone discolored at the tips, swollen with blood and aching.

"No," Genkai said. "Kuwabara even suggested lathering his hand up with soap so we could slide it off, and we were desperate enough to try but it evaporated when it hit his skin."

"And _my_ hand?"

She shrugged. "Same story."

That took me by surprise. "Heat and all?"

"We had to cut your clothes off of you to keep you from smothering," she said, and for the first time I noticed my scanty tank top and… well, utter lack of pants. I had underwear and my torso-slash-tattoo-bandages, sure, but still…

"And I rather liked those jeans," I muttered darkly.

"Get over it."

"OK, OK," I said. I bit my lip, thinking. Then I asked: "What do we do about Hiei?"

She shrugged. "It's your ballgame. We tried and we failed. The others all wanted to go to sleep after the excitement—Kurama mentioned that you in particular hadn't slept in at least two days."

It was true, I realized—between the Hunt, the feast, and the night with Ryu, I really hadn't slept a wink. I hardly felt tired, though, and what was up with that?

"When we realized that none of us could do anything about Hiei, I volunteered to keep an eye out so the others could rest." The arms folded across her chest tensed. "Ren, however, won't be waking up for a while. Her brainwaves show signs of deep sleep bordering on coma, but apparently she warned you this would happen."

"She did," I said.

She nodded. "We needn't worry about her for at least another day or two, by my count." Her eyes flickered to Hiei.

My heart stuttered. "And Hiei?"

"He always hibernates after unleashing the Dragon," she said slowly. "Only he's not this tense normally. If he doesn't get the rest he needs, he won't be able to reabsorb the Dragon's energy and repair his body." She pinned me with a glare. "If he loses that arm _and_ the Dragon, I'm holding you personally responsible."

I swallowed. "What can I do?"

"I have no idea," she said. My jaw dropped, but she just went on with: "We tried what we could, so now it's your turn."

I turned back to Hiei, to his sweating face and pulsing jaw and at the way the bones in his neck stuck out from stress. I had no idea what to do for him, no idea at all, but blood had caked on his right arm and it looked gross and itchy, so…

"Can I have a bowl of water and some rags, please?" I asked, still looking at Genkai. "Or, or maybe a sponge or two. Oh, and bandages? Maybe ointment?"

"You're going to wash him up?" she asked, raising one grey-pink eyebrow.

"Yes... No. I don't know." I sighed, looking at my hands. "I'm just following my gut, OK? And my gut says that no one could sleep well with gaping wounds all over their arm!"

When Genkai did not reply, I looked up only to find her gone, having left without a word. She reappeared a few minutes later with a bowl of warm water and a pile of rags, which she set next to Hiei before walking out again.

I didn't wait for her to come back, crab-crawling sideways to get closer to Hiei. Sitting cross-legged on the tatami floor, I carefully draped his clenched hand and my staff across my lap, trying to ignore the flakes of tried blood that rubbed off on the skin of my thighs whenever I moved him. His arm burned into my leg, hotter, even, than the heat radiating from the rest of his body. A moment of pity made me lean sideways and stroke my thumb down the side of his face, and the subtle movement made the blanket slip sideways off his bare chest. I ignored the iron-hard cushion of his muscles, as sculpted and tantalizing as they were, to study his labored breathing and the sweat beading on his pecs.

"Oh, Hiei," I murmured, smoothing his hair from his face. He wasn't wearing a covering over his Jagan, I realized, but the eye remained shut tight above the rest of his agonized face.

The bowl and the rags sat in front of me; I leaned forward, grabbed a rag, and dunked it in the water. A bit splashed on my calves, and I wrung out the excess before carefully laying it across Hiei's forehead, hoping the cool water might calm him a little, but the rag just started to steam a bit and soon enough it was totally dry.

I frowned when I saw that. How was he not burning me to a crisp, if he was so hot he could evaporate water on contact?

"His body temperature increases under stress," said a voice, and I jumped. Genkai stood in the doorway, and her face was drawn when she set a bottle of antiseptic and a roll of bandages down next to the bowl. Then she sat down across from me, arms folded and legs positioned like mine.

"Elemental demons," she continued, "often have inborn defense mechanisms that come out when they're under threat. Yukina, for instance—when she becomes frightened the room freezes over. Hiei seeks to burn threats away."

"The heat isn't so bad," I said, taking the warm rag off of his forehead. I dipped a fresh one in the water.

Genkai snorted as I wrung the rag out. "He burns differently for you."

I froze, rag poised over his arm. I looked up at Genkai to find her regarding me coolly.

"Haven't you noticed?" she said.

"Noticed what?"

"When he's around, you'll say things like 'it's stuffy' or 'it's too hot in here', but no one else feels that way." A low laugh made me blush and look away. "You're more attuned to him than you realize."

"Well, we're close, I guess," I said, and I began to dab at his wounds. The blood flaked off and adhered to the cloth; I very quickly had to get a new one.

"And you'll get even closer now that you have that thing in your back," she said.

I swallowed, still dabbing away at his wounds. "They told you about my tattoo?" I murmured.

"Kurama seems to think you have the soul of a demon inside it."

"He's right."

"Then you know that your reactions to Hiei are only going to get worse?"

I hadn't known. I guess it showed on my face, because she looked stunned—well, as stunned as Genkai ever allows herself to look, that is.

"You—" she began, torn halfway between rage and utter disbelief, but then her face crumpled and she just laughed. "You're the worst demon I've ever met!"

"I'm a human," I said, though with only half my heart.

"Bullshit," Genkai said. "Your head might be, but your body certainly isn't. You need to learn how to handle yourself better or Hiei's going to suffer."

I looked down at his arm. I had managed to get much of the blood off, and the coppery tang of the red sludge didn't nauseate me the way I'd thought it might. It was just Hiei's blood—just a part of _him_, so what was there to be freaked out by? It might actually be kind of pleasant had the situation not have been so grim…

_Wait, did I just think that blood might be _nice_?_ I thought, giving myself a mental smack. _Gross!_

Sweet, however, didn't seem to think so. For the first time since I'd woken up I felt her in my tattoo, thrumming with admonishments. She thought the blood comment was totally normal and she obviously didn't like me shying away from accepting it.

_It's normal for _you_, maybe_, I thought to her. _It offends my human sensibilities._

She sort of… giggled. Little sparks of heat danced across my tattoo, anyway.

"Dani?"

I jumped; I'd gotten lost in Sweet and ignored Genkai, who was looking at me like I'd grown another nose.

"He's clean," she told me, gesturing at Hiei's arm. "Now what?"

I glanced at the arm again. Removing the blood had unearthed an odd sight: lines like glittering black thread coiled around his flesh in a spiral, mired amid torn skin and burns.

"Should I bandage him?" I asked, and Genkai hesitated.

"He wards himself when the Dragon returns," she said. "I don't know if he'd like someone else doing it for him." A pause. "But antiseptic wouldn't go amiss, I think."

I didn't reply with words. I just picked up the bottle, uncapped it, and splashed some of the acrid liquid onto a rag. Then I gently dotted it on Hiei's wounds, over the scintillating black lines and into the furrows of his burns, and when I thought I'd finished I set the rag aside and slowly, gently ghosted the tips of my fingers down the underside of his arm. He still gripped the staff so hard his fingers looked on the verge of breaking, and the discoloration had gotten worse.

"Hiei, please let go," I said, stroking his arm as sweetly as I could. "Please. It's OK now. All of us, we're OK."

He did not unclench his hand.

I looked up at Genkai, worried, but she just seemed pensive… surprised, even.

"Try talking to him," she instructed when I caught her eye. "His energy… it rippled."

My heart jumped with encouragement . "Hiei," I murmured, trailing my fingers over the veins in his wrist as I softly said his name. "Hiei, it's OK. We're safe. We're back at the temple and, and we're safe." I didn't know what to say—talking to someone who couldn't even hear you couldn't make for very good conversation—so I just rambled on. "You and me, we got through the portal and everyone took us inside. Lauren's safe and I didn't get hurt and you're in one piece, too." I chuckled. "I think I might have hurt Kurama a little, getting to you, but… well…"

I glanced up at Genkai, who raised an eyebrow. I blushed and looked away, not liking having an audience for what I was about to say.

"Well, I don't regret hurting him, if it meant getting you home safe," I whispered. I stroked his fingers, feeling the tension in them. "But you're safe, Hiei—I'm safe, we're both safe. Please let go of my staff."

His fingers didn't even twitch.

"Do you think maybe I could talk to him in his head?" I asked, tearing my eyes away from his pinched expression and sweating skin.

"He's too deep in himself for that," Genkai said.

I looked back at Hiei. "I saw him when I was asleep," I said. "I think the staff brought us together." I cursed loudly, threading my free hand through my hair. "Why didn't I talk to him then?"

"You didn't know what was happening," Genkai said. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself and just try something else."

But what was there to try? Since I had no idea, I just kept talking to him. "Please let go, Hiei," I urged, tugging gently at his fingers. It felt like I was trying to bend steel with chopsticks made of glass. "Please, please, _please_ let go."

Nothing.

I swallowed down tears, ones that welled up before I even knew they were there.

"Try singing."

My head snapped up. Genkai wasn't looking at me, but rather at Hiei.

"If he liked hearing your voice talk," she said, "he might react even more to your singing." She snorted once. "I never thought I'd ask someone to sing Hiei a lullaby."

It was a somewhat giggle-inducing thought, that much was true, but I did not laugh as I continued to ghost my fingers over the black lines in his tanned flesh. I just thought about what she'd said, about how Hiei's consciousness rippled in reaction to my voice, and I thought about all the music I could sing him that might, might make him relax.

"My mother," I said at last, "used to sing me to sleep at night. Do you think it'll work for him?"

"How the hell should I know?"

I didn't answer her directly, but I did open my mouth. Soft, heartfelt words trickled out of me slowly, sung without flair or pomp or complication.

"_If you'll be my star,"_ I sang, _"I'll be your sky. You can hide underneath me and come out at night." _

I took a moment to breathe and swallow because my voice was thin and fragile, but I didn't strengthen it because vulnerability was what made the song work. I wanted Hiei to hear that vulnerability, wanted him to be called by it and be lulled into shared comfort, because that was what the son was about: love so strong it meant sacrifice, surrender, and letting go.

But most of all, letting go.

"_When I turn jet black and you show of your light, I live to let you shine,"_ I told him. "_I live to let you shine. But you can skyrocket away from me, and never come back if you find another galaxy, far from here, with more room to fly…" _

I let reached to the side and smoothed a fallen lock of hair from his forehead.

"…_just leave me your stardust to remember you by."_

"This is good," Genkai said.

"_If you'll be my boat," _I told Hiei, keeping my eyes on his sweating face,_ "I'll be your sea, with a depth of pure blue just to probe curiosity. Ebbing and flowing and pushed by a breeze, I live to make you free."_

My fingers still traipsed across his arm, tender and warm and coaxing.

"_I live,"_ I sang, _"to make you free."_

Beneath my hand, something went slack.

_"But you can set sail to the west, if you want to,"_ I assured him, _"and past the horizon, til' I can't even see you, far from here, where the beaches are white…"_

His brow abruptly unknit, eyes slackening into black-lashed crescents, and the tension drained out of his jaw. Lips parted, and his jerking chest drew in one long, slow breath.

"… _just leave me your wake to remember you by."_

I stopped singing as I pulled the staff out of his newly opened fist, setting it aside so I could press my thumbs into his palms and push outward, slowly spreading his fingers so blood could reach the tips. Then I picked the song back up, crooning the first verse and the chorus over again as I massaged his swollen hand, rubbing the palm with firm swirls of my thumb. His skin felt feverishly hot; I dunked a rag in the cold water and passed it over his hand, cleaning it of sweat and grime just like I'd done to the rest of his arm.

He had nice hands, I realized. Big, deft, capable, with broad palms and long fingers. A warrior's hands, ones that could have been an artist's if not for the circumstances of his birth…

When the song ended and his skin had turned back to its normal color, I gently laid his hand at his side and pulled my knees to my chest, wincing when the blood on them flaked onto my tank top.

"Good work," Genkai said.

"Thanks," I said, and I pushed my legs out again to survey the damage on my shirt. "I think I'm going to go shower and cha-a-ange…"

The final word turned into a yawn, and suddenly my eyes felt very heavy.

"Sleep first," Genkai said.

But I shook my head. "No, it's bathtime." I braced my palms on the floor behind me and prepared to rise. "I'll go to bed afterward," I said, pushing myself off the ground a bit.

Genkai opened her mouth with a frown etched between her eyes, obviously about to tell me to sit my fool ass back down, but before she could do it something wormed around my leg, jerking me back onto my butt with a thump of tailbone against wood. I yelped in pained surprise, only to find that Hiei had, in his sleep, reached out and wrapped his arm around my left thigh. The expanse of leg just above the back of my knee lay nestled in the crook of his elbow; his forearm and still-swollen hand circled between my legs, and he had laid his palm flat against the juncture where my left thigh met hip and abdomen.

As I took in the fact that Hiei was grabbing me in a oh-my-god-this-is-_really_-_freaking-intimate_ way, his head lolled toward me. With a small sigh I could barely here he pulled himself close, nose and forehead pressing into my bare hip, breath misting hot and damp against my skin. A little under three seconds later Sweet was doing a dance of giddy joy in my tattoo, setting the rest of my body practically ablaze because oh wow, he was holding me with the arm with the black Dragon-lines all over it, and oh my GOD, why was I not wearing any _pants_?

"… looks like _he_ wants you to sleep, apparently."

I could barely look at Genkai without bursting into hysterically embarrassed laughter, but when I somehow managed to meet her eyes despite my massive, tomato-faced blush, she was only smirking the tiniest bit. I didn't say a word as she grabbed my pillow off my abandoned futon and passed it to me (I was too distracted to form coherent thoughts), and without a word I put the pillow behind my head and lay back against the cool wood floorboards. We looked at one another, me blushing and her smirking, as she stood up and headed for the door, and with a low chuckle and the words "Sweet dreams, Dani," she shut flipped off the lights and shut the door behind her.

The utter dark and the cool floor didn't do much to calm me. Hiei was just too hot.

* * *

Sleep, when it at last claimed me and Sweet together, was a nice reprieve from the torture of Hiei's searing grasp.

What came with that sleep, however, was a torture all its own.

"I'm only going to say this once," I told him. "_Tell me the truth, Koenma_."

To his credit, the man had trouble meeting my eyes. Not to his credit, he chose not to say a word.

Seeing this and not liking it one bit, I advanced on him and shoved him with the heels of my hands, hard. He stumbled back with a surprised expression, but I kept coming and shoved him back a few more paces.

"Tell me the truth!" I demanded with each push. "Tell me the truth! TELL ME THE FUCKING TRUTH!"

"Dani," he said, catching my wrists at last, but I wrenched away from him and aimed a punch at his chest. The blow connected with a smack, but my weak arms only made Koenma grunt a little—probably more out of surprise than pain, and that only made my rage burn hotter.

"When were you going to tell me I'm not from another world?" I demanded, punching him again. "When were you going to tell me all of this was a lie? When, Koenma, WHEN! Because I'm sick and fucking tired of all your little surprises, and—"

Honeyed eyes were desperate. "Dani, please, listen to me," he said.

Inconsolable, I cut him off. "You're a liar!" I roared, punching away. "You're a rotten liar! I should never have trusted you!"

"Everything I didn't tell you, it was for your own good," he said.

My fist landed against his chest again, but by then I had started crying and I didn't have the strength to both sob and hit him at once. My hands twisted into the fabric of his shirt as I cried, holding him arms-length away from me as much as I was holding him arms-length close to me. He made no move to comfort me with his touch, and for that I was grateful, but even so I wished he'd do something, because having him just stand there while I suffered was so cruel and—

"If I had told you about the Sisters and the Bright Ones ahead of time," he said just as his silence grew unbearable, "you would have run to Lauren's side before the time was right."

"But you flat-out lied to me," I said through a throat thick with tears. "You said that the past didn't have the Sisters in it."

"And if I _had_ told you the truth about them, and if I'd told you Lauren was there when the Beasts destroyed the world, what would happen if you said something ahead of time to Yusuke and the others?" he said. "You have no memories of the Bright Ones—having knowledge of them with no memory of them would have incriminated you. It would have looked like someone was feeding you information. I had to lie. Otherwise, you wouldn't have been safe."

I glared up at him. "Safe from my big mouth, you mean?" I spat. "I can keep a secret, you know!"

"I know," he said gently. "I know you can."

I swallowed, thinking. Then I asked: "So Lauren really _was_ in your past? The past where the Beasts destroyed this world? You woke her up and everything?"

Koenma nodded slowly, and something darkened in his eyes. I didn't like it.

"And me?" I asked suspiciously. "Was _I_ in your past, too? There's a pod with my name on it, so did you just pull me out of it and wipe my memory and—"

"You aren't from this world, Dani," he said.

_What?_ "Bullshit—Lauren remembers me!" I protested.

"She remembers your _double_, Dani," he said patiently. "Your double, who looks and acts just like you and who _is_ you, but isn't." His face fell into sorrow. "Your double wandered out of her pod and died, alone and lost and confused. There was nothing I could do to save her."

I froze, staring at him in confused wonder. Then I murmured: "Her?"

His eyes fell closed. "In this world, you have a doppelganger," he explained. "So does Lauren."

"I don't understand," I said, because I didn't.

Koenma said: "The Lauren you met yesterday is not _your_ Lauren, but rather a carbon copy of her that is indistinguishable from the one you know and love. She is _a_ Lauren, but she isn't _the_ one you loved." A gentle smile. "It is hard to understand, but… the love and friendship between the two of you still exists. You're still the same people, just… different incarnations."

"I," I said, but he shushed me.

"You really are from a different world, Dani," Koenma said. "That much I promise you."

"But how can I trust you?" I asked, the hands twined into his clothes tugging at him harshly. "None of this makes any sense! How can I be from another world but still exist in this one? How does it all work?"

Hands came up and encircled my wrists, pulling my hands down to my sides. Koenma's mouth thinned into a hard line of… something. I couldn't tell what.

"I told you," he said, "back when we first met, that I chose you to come here and right the wrongs of the past because you knew about the anime series Yu Yu Hakusho, and because you showed compassion so strongly that you gave your life for another. But that is not the whole story."

I couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't even think, eyes locked on his lips as my ears numbly absorbed the words spewing from them.

"The whole story," he said, "is that you weren't a random fan of an old anime series." A hand came up and brushed the hair from my face.

"You," he said, "were anything but random."

"So what am I?" I said. "You picked me to stop Ryu and Seishou, but how can I stop those monsters when I don't even know what I _am_?"

Koenma attempted a reply, opening his mouth as his eyes dropped and tried to tell me the truth, but before he could speak someone else did.

_No,_ I thought as I felt them appear behind me, felt their presence washing over my back like a cold graveyard wind_. No, not someone._

Some_thing_.

_He picked you to stop Ryu and Seishou, did he, little girl?_ the horrible voice boomed, and It began to laugh a laugh of steel severing bone and heads being crushed under tyrants' feet._ He picked you to stop an inconsequential psychic and a freak of nature, did he, little girl?_

I turned as if underwater, movements dragging slow and limbs hanging heavy, and behind me roared an utter blackness that threatened to swallow Koenma and I up like minnows before a whale with teeth like shark's. The space between me and the blackness throbbed and pulsed, like It wanted to come close and pulverize me into jelly of blood and—

_I think you are both forgetting something, vermin,_ It screamed, and the blackness shot forward and engulfed us. Icy cold pulled at my skin and hair, lighting me up with pain that invaded as much as it sought to tear me apart from the inside; the shadow poured into my mouth and nose and eyes and ears, drowning me in hate and fear_. _

_Ryu and Seishou, psychic and freak, are not your true enemies, _It said, gleefully plunging into my soul. _Ryu and Seishou are NOTHING. They are not the monsters you should fear._

"Dani!" I heard Koenma scream, and I think I screamed back, pushing the dark out of my mouth with all the music I could command. Out of the hateful black swam a small light, comforting and as warm as a zephyr in the tundra shadow, and out of the light came a hand, and I reached for it and tried to twist out of the grasping dark.

_LEST YOU FORGET, LITTLE GIRL AND FALLEN PRINCE_, It bellowed, grabbing at me as I felt Koenma's hand close over my wrist, _THEY ARE NOTHING COMPARED TO _ME_, THE TRUE MONSTER!_

"Let her go, Beast!" Koenma screamed, and then light exploded all around me and I was in Koenma's arms, safe and cloistered and held tight—

_I AM YOUR TRUE ENEMY!_ said the voice. Around Koenma and I spun a sphere of light, light that shone out of Koenma's outstretched hand and held the dark at bay, and It slammed itself against the sphere over and over again as it tried to furiously get inside. _YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN ME, AND THIS I WILL NOT TOLERATE! I AM YOUR TRUE ENEMY! I AM THE REAL MONSTER! NEVER FORGET THAT!_

"Dani, you need to wake up; I can't hold It off for long!" Koenma said, and I stared into his face with an open mouth and tried to dip into theta, where I could—

"Woman?"

Koenma and I both froze, eyes locked together at the sound of this new voice, and before I could turn to look at the source Koenma's hands came up and cupped my face.

"Don't look," he hissed, honey eyes ablaze with amber fire. "Don't look, Dani, you know it isn't him! It's the Book, trying to seduce-"

"Woman?" the new voice growled, and the darkness around Koenma's sphere vanished. Silence made my ears ring. "Woman, let me in. I have to protect you."

That growl, those words, that _voice_—

"Hiei!" I said, because it was _his voice_ and he was out there with _that thing_, but Koenma would not let me go. I kicked and struggled and screamed, tearing at Koenma because Hiei was _here_, I had to get to him, I had to break free because Koenma had crushed me to his chest—

"Forgive me," he whispered above the sound of my struggling and screams. A hand cupped the back of my lashing head. "Forgive me, Dani."

A pinch, and—

In an instant, I was awake.

* * *

I woke up angry and with tears on my face, frightened because Hiei, oh my god _Hiei_, and then—

And then I relaxed because Hiei still had a hand wrapped around my leg; even in the dark I could tell. His heat made my skin prickle like a million roving fireflies. The steady breathing on my hip made the hairs on my arm rise to attention and my belly tingle with warmth, but I didn't move as I lay there and listened to him breathe. Lauren lay a few feet to my right, soft snores of deepest sleep telling me she was fine, she was perfect, she was—

_She was in the past where the world ended,_ I thought, remembering._ She was there. She died._

Despite my confusion, I had one clear thought. It was: _I won't let that happen to her again._

I lay there for a few minutes more, thinking about Koenma as I calmed my racing heart. His talk of doubles, of how mine died and how the Lauren I slept beside wasn't the one I knew and loved… what did it all mean?

Though I couldn't see her face, I could remember it: I could easily recall the curve of her wide mouth, the strength of her jaw, and the set of her true-blue eyes. She'd looked at me with love when she came out of the pod, she knew our song, every time I saw her I felt relief steal over me like a tidal wave. She knew my name and just how to comfort me, even with our limited interaction I could see that much, and she was…

She was Lauren.

Double or no double, this was _Lauren_.

_But she's not mine_, I thought. _She's not… _my_ Lauren. Right?_

Sweet twitched in my shoulders; I was sore from lying on the ground for however long I'd been there. She sent me a burst of comforting warmth as I sat up, and I smiled a little when a memory—not _my_ memory, but hers—burst inside my head. I felt the way I'd felt when I held Lauren safe in my arms, saw the way she'd looked at me with an outsider's perspective. Love was evident in both our faces and words, from my singing to her drawling comforts to…

"She's still Lauren, I guess," I said into the dark, and I looked in her direction. I couldn't see her, but I could hear her snores and my heart softened. "Even if she's not the same one, my feelings for her won't change."

Feeling marginally better on the whole affair, I raised my arms over my head until my shoulders cracked. I wasn't cold thanks to Hiei's touch, but I really wanted to put on pants regardless. I turned toward Hiei, thinking about how I could make his let go of me so I could get up and leave, and so I could take better stock of the situation I dipped into theta, pulled out the firesong, and made a small ball of light hover between Lauren and I. She looked like a vaguely glimmering lump in the flickering light, and I couldn't help but smile at her again before looking down at Hiei.

He hadn't moved since I fell asleep, still lying on his back with one arm wrapped around my thigh and face turned toward my hip. His lips were parted, his eyes were shadowed in the firelight, his cheeks were handsome and hollow, and the blue parts of his hair were indistinguishable in the gloom. I stared at him for a minute or so, just trying to take him in and revel in the steady, unlabored sound of his breath. He looked peaceful, worry-free, and… well, cute.

Very cute, despite the killer behind the sleeping face.

"Fangirls across the world squealed when you fell asleep after your fight with Bui, you know," I told him in crass English. "If you're devastating when you're awake, well, sleeping's only the icing on the cake." I paused. "Rhyme unintentional. Blame the lyricist in me."

He didn't reply or even twitch. Unable to help myself, my eyes traveled over the muscled expanse of his chest with a hungry sweep, and as I traced the curve of his elegant collarbone and neck, something else caught my eye with a sharp silver glimmer.

Leaning forward with a frown, I reached out and touched the silver line that trickled sideways across his neck just under his jaw. With a start, I realized that I was touching something made of metal. I shivered when I grazed Hiei's hot skin in the process of carefully hooking a finger under the slim metal chain and dragging it forward, pulling it down the planes of his bare chest until it made a 'v' ending just below his sternum. A small weight on the hidden part of the chain made the process more difficult than it seemed, and I carefully reached behind his head with my other hand and found what hung there. The pendant tangled with his hair, but my fingers were gentle and I brought it slowly into the light.

I knew it was a Hiruseki stone before I saw it; it was as if the touch of it against my fingertips told me everything I needed to know and more. Cool on my skin and weighty, the translucent blue-green gem—flawlessly spherical, utterly breathtaking—reflected the light of my illusion-fire and made it shatter into glacier-blue spears of softness that bathed Hiei in a calming glow, casting his face into gentle relief as it lay steady on his chest despite his rise-and-fall breath. It seemed the exact opposite of Hiei in every way: where he was all heat and fire and fury, it was coolness and calm and serenity, and looking at it made my torn emotions mend, made my uneasiness melt, made…

"Maybe he and it are more alike than I gave them credit for," I murmured, caressing the gem with a fingertip. "Hiei's been pretty soothing lately."

Hiei's breathing hitched, and the Hiruseki and chain slipped to fall between his arm and torso.

"You said my name," he said. I jumped when his arm tightened around my thigh, fingers curling into my skin softly. "What were you saying?"

"I, I didn't know you were awake," I stammered.

His head moved, lips pressing into my hip. Hot air burned my skin when he said: "I heard you."

I didn't know what to say to that, so I said nothing and stared at the ground between my legs. I'm sure I would have made myself sound like an idiot if I'd tried to speak aloud. A half naked Hiei touching me in the dark made it hard to talk.

"Did you wash my arm?" he asked, lips brushing me with every syllable.

"Uh-huh," I squeaked.

He licked his lips; I knew because he 'accidentally' licked me in the process (though whether or not it was a calculated gesture is anyone's guess).

"Why is there blood on you?" he asked. He inhaled sharply though his mouth, pressing it wide open against my leg. Then his lips curled. "It's mine."

"Uh-huh," I said weakly.

"How long have I been sleeping?"

There was no way to avoid a direct question with a mere grunt. I took a deep breath. Then I said: "I don't know."

"Why?"

"I slept, too," I said.

His fingers curled slightly, then uncurled; I couldn't stop the shiver that came as a result.

"We slept like this?" he murmured.

Another deep breath. "You wouldn't let go."

"Did you want me to?"

Another shiver before I admitted: "Not really."

He chuckled in the dark, and then he sat up. My leg came up with him, still caught in the crook of his elbow, and I essentially wound up with my bad leg draped over his lap. His other hand came up and grabbed my knee before gliding slowly up my thigh, coming to rest on the inside of it about halfway up.

I forgot to breathe, staring at him in the light of the illusion fire hovering in the air next to me, because every part of me had caught fire. His eyes looked like they burned, sucking in the light and magnifying it…

"Go clean up, Dani," Hiei said, the low growl of his voice making another shudder quiver up my spine. "I'll be here when you come back."

Despite how nice a bath sounded right then (and despite how the promise of Hiei waiting shirtless for me in a dark room made cleaning myself up sound like a great idea indeed), I hesitated. _What if Lauren wakes up?_ I thought, and I glanced at her. _Even though she's a double or whatever, I don't even care anymore, what if she recognizes the Yu Yu Hakusho crowd?_ I bit my lip, still staring at her lumpy silhouette. _I never got to ask if YYH existed in this world's past. I should be here when she wakes up so I can explain things!_

Hiei saw where I looked and looked, too. His eyes narrowed, and he kept his gaze locked on Lauren when he said: "Go. I'll keep an eye on that one."

I looked at him sharply, but he seemed serious enough.

"And you'll be here when I come back?" I asked, and his lips parted over his teeth in a feral grin.

"You want me to be?" he asked, eyes flickering across my body. I felt my face heat up, suddenly conscious of my state of undress, and Hiei's fingers moved on the inside of my thigh.

"Yes," I bit out, because his touch had somehow made the word burst free, and embarrassment made me babble: "But you're going to have to stop touching me if you want me to leave."

That strange smile of his only widened. "Now isn't that interesting," he said, hand pressing against me more tightly. "You can't leave me?"

"Because, because I can't walk with my leg in your lap," I stammered.

He chuckled. "Of course that's the reason," he said, eyes half-lidded and smoldering. His arm slipped out from under my leg, hand catching me behind the knee so he could lift me leg and bodily turn me away from him. His other hand slid from the inside to the top of my thigh in a slow arch, then moved up and cupped my hip with a trail of molten heat ghosting in its wake.

"I'll be waiting," he said, mouth maddeningly close to my ear, and I tried not to look like I was freaking out when I stood up, grabbed my staff, and headed for the door, because I was still wearing just my underwear and Hiei had a really great view of my butt oh god oh god oh—

Escape into the hallway was sweet… sort of, anyway, because Botan was standing outside the door with her ear pressed to the keyhole.

* * *

_NOTES: _

_Soooo Hiei might be a bit of a sadistic tease who's going to make Dani suffer with all the blush-inducing comments and touches he can muster. But you'll like it, and he won't always be this touchy because I won't be able to handle writing a scene like that each week. So, yeah, unresolved sexual tension. Very fun. And it will be used sparingly because I don't want this to turn into a sex-fic no matter what you little perverts say about it! SO HA! THERE! YOUR DREAMS HAVE BEEN CRUSHED!_

_Ahem._

_Next week is plotty, and no, I haven't forgotten about Dani's bite or the loose ends with Koenma. Patience, patience…_

_I would like to give a shoutout to __**Miss Mercury Blue**__ for introducing me to the song "Boats & Birds," which I love and am obsessed with and which I used in this chapter during the let-go-of-the-staff scene. BEST. SONG. EVER. THANK YOU!_

_Many thanks to those who commented last chapter, because your One-Year-Anniversary reviews are now safely saved in a word document of happy memories and love and cake. Lots of cake. Feel special. Itsallaboutbob, etowa-ru, Zetsubel, BiGayStraightWhoCares, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, colbub, Reclun, Asking Alice, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Titch-ola, Supreme Baka, AmoreVampiresv-v, Ry171819, Kaiya's Watergarden, Doily Rox, Off-Color, Takara Rose Oizumi, chocolateluvr13, meganerd, ephemeral violet, Angel of Randomosity, American Senpai, Koryu Elric, Misuzu-PM, [ no name! whoops! ], j.d.y., Snowgirl7589, Kai-Chan94, SillyGoddessDisco, spiritfoxxx821, Kelly_ **(Kelly, I think you tried to give me your email, but FFnet edited it out because it doesn't like it when people put links in reviews. Yikes! My email is on my profile if you need to get in touch!),** _Dude wheres my spirit gun, Katt Jeane, Tally Youngblood, Kaelyn Marie, Yumchaitea, The Tokyo Time Killer, rain chant, Masuyo Shun, Yoko Kiara14, AkaMizu-chan, OhhTaylorJade, sweetyjg, Naitza-Kururugi, ImMyOwnNoOneElses, ShadowFireFox13, DaAmazingMeepers!_

_Oh, and ARTWORK! We have MORE of it, by: _

_MistressXJade/OhhTaylorJade, who drew Dani's perverted face and Dani in her Elaina form! HOORAY!_

_Wings of Silver Rain/ThatPokemonFreak, who drew Dani as a pokemon trainer catching Hiei! HILARIOUS!_

—_and TokyoTimeKiller, who drew Dani and Hiei's first kiss! HUZZAH!_

_Links are on my profile; GO SHOWER THEM WITH LOVE! And cake. That too. _

_GRAPHOSPASM, OUT! (*runs, hides, and begins to type next week's chapter of CRAZY*)_


	55. Chapter 55: I Kissed A Girl

Future Talk

Chapter 55:

"I (Never) Kissed A Girl"

* * *

I found out about Botan being a little sneak when I opened the door, because the doorknob hit her in the nose. She fell onto her butt with a squeak and skittered across the hall, pressing her back to the wall as I threw the door the rest of the way open and met her stunned eyes. We stared at one another for a good ten seconds, my mouth dropped open and hers twisted into a please-don't-kill-me smile, one hand clamped over her reddened face and the other held up between us like a shield.

"What are you doing?" I asked, tone sandwiched somewhere between disbelief and mounting annoyance.

"Uh," she said, eyes flicking up and down my body before getting twice as big. Her first words, when she became able to speak them, were: "Where are your _pants_?"

I looked down, belatedly remembered my state of undress, and promptly slammed the door in Botan's freaked out face. I didn't look at Hiei when I crossed the room to my shelves, grabbed a pair of shorts, and put them on the floor so I could step into them. I leaned my back and hips against the wall for support as I pulled the elastic waistband up my legs, and when I had to lift my hips a little to get them away from the wall so I could tug the shorts over them, too—well, Hiei growled lowly in the dark. My face heated up but I ignored him and, finally dressed, proceeded to walk out the door again.

Botan still sat right where I'd left her, still holding her nose and still staring like she'd seen something very, very disturbing indeed. I couldn't help but glare a little in my defense while I shut the door behind me and leaned on it, and while we exchanged looks she swallowed, smiled, and laughed nervously.

"So who told you?" I asked, tone blunt.

Botan fidgeted. "I have no idea what you mean, Dani!" she chirped, lies written as plain as day on her face. "Who told me what?"

"Oh cut the crap, Botan," I snapped. "Who told you about me and…"

My blush—the one Hiei had induced with that suggestive growl of his—only deepened, and I didn't say Hiei's name aloud.

"You wouldn't have been listening at the keyhole unless you suspected something," I finished lamely.

Botan chewed on her lower lip with a face covered in guilt, staring down at her lap pathetically as she tried to keep her mouth shut.

But this was Botan we're talking about, people: a shut mouth is anathema to her very nature.

"… Yusuke might have dropped a few hints?" she suggested at last, voice squeaking out the syllables. "Not that I asked him, of course, it's just that the two of you seemed so close and it was so unexpected… I had to wonder what your relationship was! And I mean, I never would have guessed that you were into—that you were into—"

"Into what?" I snapped. "Foul-tempered fire demons?"

Botan started to nod, but then she stopped. Her blue eyebrows knit together and her lips parted, and it took a good minute or so for her to finally say: "What are you talking about?"

That sure threw me for a loop. "What are _you_ talking about?" I asked.

"Why, _Ren_, of course!" Botan piped. The bottom fell out of my stomach. "I was wondering who she was and when I started asking Yusuke about her —subtly, of course, because I didn't mean to pry or anything—well, he got all flustered and tried to act like he didn't know what I was talking about, and then he said that the two of you were close and I said _how close_, and he said that the two of you kissed each other!"

I listened to her speech with a brain numbed by metaphorical Novocain, and when she was finished I just stared at her. Her face had gone from jubilant to gentle.

"It's OK, Dani," she said softly, reaching out a hand so she could grab my free one and squeeze it. "There's nothing wrong with liking… liking…" She went crimson. "I mean, there's nothing bad about being into other wome… I mean… you weren't into any of the men around you when we first met and I wondered why that was, but now it all makes sense—"

"I am not," I growled, "_gay_!"

This seemed to take her by surprise. "You're not?" she squeaked, hand freezing around mine. "B-but Yusuke, he said you and Ren—"

"He named her by name?" I snapped. "He said to you, 'Botan, Dani and Ren are lesbians and they made out in front of me?'"

"N-not in so many words—"

"Ah HA!" I yodeled, leveling a finger at her face. She blinked at me innocently. "Those _weren't_ his words, then! So what _were_ his words, Botan?"

She seemed desperate for escape, eyes darting left and right as she pressed herself tight up against the wall. "He, he said that 'They kissed each other, that's all I'm saying, OK?', and I just let it go after that!" she stammered, not looking at me.

"And before that?" I pressed. "I want to hear the _entire_ conversation!"

"Why do you want to know the entire—"

"_Botan_!"

"OK, OK!" she squeaked. "When he was walking to his room I pulled him aside and said, 'So, the two of _them_ know each other, huh?', and he went red around the ears and said that he'd promised you he wouldn't talk about it, and naturally that sparked my curiosity so I said, 'But Yusuke, I have to know! I have to report everything about Dani to Koenma!' And he went even redder and mumbled something about being chopped into bits, but he was just being dramatic because everyone knows _you_ can't do things like that, Dani—"

_But Hiei can,_ I thought with mounting dread. _Maybe he thought Botan was talking about me and Hiei, and Botan just misunderstood—_

"—and so after a few minutes of using my cat-face on him he cracked, just like I thought he would, and he said that you told him that you and Ren kissed!"

I stared down at her for a few seconds. Then: "And those were his… exact words?"

"Of course, just like you asked for!" Botan said, obviously pleased with herself, and I said:

"I'll kill him."

Her pleasure dissolved into fear and guilt and apprehension. "Now Dani, your sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of—" she began, hopping to her feet so she could take me by the shoulders and stare soulfully into my eyes, but I shrugged her off with a snarl.

"I'm going to _kill him_!" I yelled, thinking: _He covered up me and _Hiei_ with me and _Ren_! That bastard, that's even _worse_!_ I turned and started to clomp off down the hallway, but then I backtracked on a relieved-looking Botan whose face quickly fell back into fear-Dani mode. "Where is he?" I asked, voice laced through with venom, and she stuttered the word 'kitchen' before I left her in a quaking pile of terrified shinigami.

The kitchen was dim when I finally got there, the only light coming from the bulb above the sink. The window behind the sink showed that it was nighttime outside (How long had I been sleeping? What time was it? I really needed a clock in my room) and I could smell food coming from the steaming pots and pans on the stove. Yusuke, oddly enough, stood over them and was whistling to the otherwise empty room as he stirred one of them with a ladle, and when I threw the door open and it hit the wall with a bang he jumped and spun around with the ladle raised like a weapon.

Yusuke was, to my astonishment, wearing an apron. I hope you understand why, in that case, it took me so long to stop staring at him, stride into the room, and rekindle my anger all over again.

"Um, hi, Dani?" he asked, glancing down at his apron before going red across the nose. "Oh, uh, this? I can explain this, you see, Yukina was asleep and I was hungry and I can make ramen and—"

"You!" I shrieked, pointing at him. "You! I AM NOT A LESBIAN!"

Yusuke's expression looked like someone had told him Keiko was actually a man. Brown eyes snapped open wide, horrified at the thought and they totally did not reflect the guilt I had expected to see in them, but I hardly cared as I came at him with grit teeth and copious amounts of growling.

"Uh, who said you were?" he asked, still as flabbergasted and freaked out as previously mentioned.

"_You_ did!" I stamped my good foot on the ground once. "To Botan! Yesterday! You told her that Ren and I kissed each other!"

"Wait, _what_?" he said, and he started shaking his head quickly from side to side. "No way, no I didn't!"

"Oh come off it, Yusuke," I sneered. "She told me what you said word for word. She said 'so the two of them know each other?' all suggestively, and you said that Ren and I kissed!"

A horrible light bulb appeared to have detonated somewhere in the vicinity of his head. "Wait, she was asking about _Ren_?" he asked, walking around the table toward me. "No she wasn't! She was definitely asking about Hiei!"

"I thought so too, but then she quoted you word for word and she swore you said that Ren and I kissed each other!"

"Well, technically you did," he said, poking me in the forehead with a finger. "Right there. Remember?"

"Not the goddamn point!" I hissed. "And now I'm going to repeat myself for the third time: YOU TOLD HER THAT I KISSED A GIRL!"

"And I'm telling you again that I didn't!" he protested, and when he raised his hand to point at my face he almost hit me with the ladle still clenched in his fist. I batted it aside and he tossed it on the table with a curse, and then he stripped the apron off over his head because fifteen seconds of fumbling with the knots got him nowhere.

"Look," he said once the deathtrap of an apron had been cast aside, "Botan came up to me and started asking if you and _somebody_ were close, and since you made such a damn big show of running after Hiei, who can blame me for assuming that's who she meant? Botan might not be brilliant or whatever, but she's not blind!"

I processed this, but slowly, because my cooling anger still made it hard to think. "So she didn't mention me and Ren by name?" I finally asked.

Yusuke stomped his foot and leaned into my face to shout: "_That's_ what I've been trying to _tell_ _you_!"

Cowed, I muttered a small 'Oh.'

"I didn't say that 'Dani and _Ren_ kissed', I said that 'Dani and _you-know-who_ kissed'!" he yelled. "I thought that if I said Hiei's name out loud he'd hear it and come kill me! Sheesh!"

A new thought struck me, and as it did I lashed out and smacked Yusuke in the upper arm. He yelped and clutched at himself with confused, kicked-puppy eyes.

"What the hell was that for?"

"You broke your promise, dumbass!" I yelled.

"Promise? What promise?"

"The promise you made to not tell anyone that Hiei and I kissed each other!"

Yusuke gaped at me. "B-but she thinks it was you and Ren, so where's the harm?"

"The harm is that she thinks I'm a lesbian!" I cried. "And I am NOT a lesbian because I'll have you know that since I mentioned it the first time, Hiei and I have kissed each other a grand total of _twice_! So, therefore, I AM NOT A LESBIAN! Lesbians don't have fire demons for boyfriends!"

Yusuke had no idea how to react to that, so I just crossed my arms over my chest and smirked at him in triumph. The moment was short-lived, of course, because we both jumped when the door swung open with a creak. I nearly gave myself whiplash turning to look at the intruder, and I went cold all over when I saw Botan standing there, mouth open and eyes alight.

"You and Hiei kissed each other?" she said in a reverent whisper. "You and Hiei—you and Hiei—" Her cheeks went pink as her lips curled in a goofy smile. "Twice! Oh _my_!"

It was too much for my poor brain to handle. With a scream of frustration I marched out of the room and headed for the bathroom, because being alone and away from Botan's wedding planner eyes was sounding better and better every second.

* * *

Hot water, green apple shampoo, and shaving my legs—oh my god, _shaving my legs_! I giggled throughout my bath because it was just so nice to strip off my clothes and unwind the sweaty bandages still wrapped around my tattoo, and once I finished soaping myself up at the showers and found the layer of shell-pink skin hiding beneath a layer of dirt and grime—

"Ouch," I said when I passed a washcloth over my neck. Something stung a little when the water hit it, and when I touched the place with my fingers to investigate I felt a large circle of broken skin marring the juncture of my neck and shoulder. It took a moment to remember Ryu's attack, and when I did I covered the tooth marks with my hand and squeezed my eyes shut.

_I can't believe Ryu did that,_ I thought, tracing the circle with a fingertip. _It was horrible, mean… cruel._ _Did he really think doing something like that would make me like him?_

Something told me 'yes', and the little ball of coldness under my breastbone—it was still there, still icy, still too painful to think about—seemed to pulse when I shuddered in revulsion. Ryu had said some weird things right before biting me, things that, apparently, Hogosha had told him about how some demons proved their worth to potential mates. Excessive force, showing dominance…

_Hiei talked about dominating me because I was a demon_, I remembered, thinking of our conversation is the bathroom back on our little island in Demon World. _But Hiei never tried something this extreme on me. Hiei was… gentle, in comparison._

The thought of Hiei being gentle made me snort and think_: No, not gentle—just respectful. Hiei might be as socially savvy as a brick, but he knows what going too far is._ I considered that for a second. _Well, probably. He has his moments, at least._

I very carefully cleaned the wound on my throat with soap and water, trying to ignore the little ball of coldness that still lingered in my chest, and I allowed myself a long, luxurious soak in the tub to ease my tense muscles when I was through.

As is wont to happen when I bathe, I began to think. As is even more wont to happen after dreaming the way I'd dreamed earlier, I began to think about Koenma.

The biggest concern I had initially, of course, came from the fact that the Beast—because the dark voice could belong to nothing else, I was sure—seemed to have found Koenma, or me, or something, but mostly I was worried about Koenma being stuck in the weird dream-place with a Beast. I just couldn't be sure if the Beast in my dream was the same Beast living in the Book in the temple, or if it was one of the Beasts that had destroyed Koenma's future world. If it was the former, well, it probably couldn't get to Koenma unless he was in my dreams, but if it was one of the ones that had destroyed the future…

Could it be possible that Koenma been found?

As I lay in the hot water, hair piled in a knot on the top of my head so it could start to dry, I felt my skin grow clammy despite the heat and steam. I didn't want Koenma to be found; I wanted him to be safe; I wanted to find a way to…

I lifted an arm and draped it over my face, water splattering across my cheeks. Even though I felt betrayed by Koenma, I still didn't want him to die, and a small part of me still wanted to save him even though he'd said it was impossible. Not that I had any ideas about how to do that, of course—I was stumped.

Well, sort of. I figured that since the past version of Koenma was still alive, the future version couldn't take his place because having two Koenmas in the same world would create a paradox. Unless I killed the present-day Koenma off or something—but wouldn't that make the future Koenma not exist anymore? Maybe if I killed the present one at the same time I pulled the future one into the present day…

_Wait, NO!_ I thought, smacking my palms against my cheeks to snap myself out of that train of thought. _No murdering people! That's bad! How would you feel if someone killed you, even if it was another version of yourself—_

I belatedly remembered that I already had been killed, and that I had not liked it one bit. Then I remembered that I'd actually been killed _twice_, in a way—I had been stabbed to death in one world, and then my double had died in another.

_But I guess the death of the other-me is why I can exist in this world_, I realized. _The other Dani was like a placeholder. I couldn't come here unless I had a place waiting for me, and her death opened one up._

My body tensed at the thought.

_But that means Koenma _knew_ I had a double here,_ I thought, recalling his assurance that I was not a random choice for his role as world-saver. _That means he knew that she—I?—was going to die in this world, not to mention that I was going to die in my old world._

_Could it be that I was picked… _because_ I was going to die? Because I was going to die… and my double was a Bright One?_

I opened my eyes to stare at the bathroom's tile ceiling, because that reasoning didn't quite add up. There were a ton of Bright Ones out there he could have picked over the course of the years preceding the theft of the Book, and my double had died and disappeared long before the mess with the Book and Ryu and Seishou had started, so my identity as a Bright One couldn't have that much to do with it.

_Which means he didn't pick me _just_ because I was a Bright One, but because of something else on top of that,_ I thought. _But what?_

_Well, the beginning is usually a good place to start_, I told myself, and I very carefully went over everything I knew. Koenma had known the Bright Ones existed (and he'd lied to me about it), he'd known that Lauren was the Bright Lady (and lied about it), he'd known I'd had a double (and lied about that, too), he'd known that the boys and I would run into the Sisters and Lauren (and he'd _also_ lied about that)…

_OK, let me get this straight,_ I thought. _In the past that I wasn't a part of, Yusuke and everyone else went to the Demon World to chase after Ryu, just like we did. The only difference is that I wasn't there, but how does that change anything about the new future? I'm not a fighter, so what does my role in all of this do as far as changing the future goes? I mean, I didn't do all that much—I just got us inside the Sisters' camp and got us near Lauren—_

I sat up, sending water sloshing over the side of the tub. "Oh holy fuck," I deadpanned, staring at the water as it churned around my bent knees. "That's it, isn't it?"

It was a very strange epiphany, but it was an epiphany nonetheless. You see, the only difference my presence could make between this reality and the alternate past was to get us near Lauren and to wake her up—and now that I thought about it, _Seishou was after Lauren_, so if I didn't help us get her, then—

"So the difference between the old past and the new one," I said out loud in English, voice reverberating around the empty bathroom, "is that I was able to get us Lauren, which probably means that they _didn't_ get her in the past I wasn't a part of. _Seishou_ probably got her."

But what did that do to make the future end in such tragedy?

… could it be that Lauren, my sweet best friend, was the one who summoned…?

_Now way,_ I thought, pushing the idea away. _That would never happen._

"Anyway," I said brusquely, settling back down into the water as I tried to change the subject of the conversation I was having with myself (I'm going nuts, I just know it). "If Lauren is on _my_ side, she won't go to Seishou's side. She'd never betray me." I thought about that. "So Koenma chose me… so Lauren would be sure to side with us?"

It seemed like solid enough reason to choose me to come into this world, but was there more to it than that?

For the life of me, I couldn't figure it out. In the end, all I came up with was: "Koenma chose me because he needed Lauren to be on his side. But why does he need Lauren so much? What does she have to do with summoning the Beasts or siding with Seishou or whatever? Why is Lauren so damned important?"

Suddenly a memory popped up, one of Hogosha's teary face looming over me as she spoke words I could hardly hear. It had been right after Sweet drove Ryu's bite out of my skin, when Hogosha gave me my staff and told me to run.

_"Leave, now,"_ she had said. _"Seishou and his talk of the machine, and of the Bright Ones as the keys to its operation… Ryu does not know what Seishou plans for them, just as he does not truly know what Seishou plans for you. Forgive him for that."_

I hadn't known what she'd been talking about at the time—I had been under too much stress to really give her words much thought—but thinking about them now made my blood run a little colder. The machine, that sounded so ominous…

"Lauren is the Bright Lady," I said slowly, "and she is the key to a machine that Seishou wants to use to… destroy the world?" A pause. "But what do the Bright Ones have to do with a machi…"

Everything snapped into place in an instant. The Bright Ones were _Americans_, oh my god, it all made _sense_! My breathing hitched, thoughts racing in a hurried tumble because _what_ had Koenma told me back in the hotel so long ago, _what_ had he told me about how America had destroyed itself? The words were fuzzy at first, but the longer I concentrated on the scene the more clearly it played out in my head.

"_The people of America dabbled in technology so evil it ripped the very fabric of space in two,"_ he'd said as we stared at one of the only maps of Demon World in existence. _"They used this technology to go to war with themselves, and in their struggle for conquest and internal hatred the Americas were swallowed by the sea as they tumbled down into hell, never to be seen again."_

"Technology," I whispered in Japanese. Then, in English: "Hogosha said 'machine' in English, but Koenma spoke in Japanese and he said 'technology'… they don't translate the same, but maybe his source… maybe what it _really_ meant…"

With a splash I sank into the water, letting it close over my head as I squeezed my eyes shut tight. A hollow roaring in my ears made thinking hard, but I managed somehow.

_Lauren, she's the key to the machine that might have destroyed America, and Seishou is after it, _I thought, frantic._ So by keeping her on our side we prevent Seishou from using the machine, and in the past when she was on _his_ side they used the Book to—_

My breath had run out and I came up spluttering. That part didn't make sense—the world had been destroyed by the Beasts, but Seishou and Lauren working together would probably have gone after the _machine_, not the Book, so why…?

"So Lauren wasn't responsible for the destruction of the world, because she and Seishou were after the machine, not the Book, and the Book was what destroyed the world," I muttered. "But then why is she important? What does she have to do with the end of the world that's so important we need her on our side?" I paused, frowning, and let out a frustrated scream. "And if Seishou is after the machine, why did he need the Book in the first place? And where the hell does _Ryu_ come in with all of this?"

Another memory came up, this one of Ryu swearing off of his allegiance to Seishou. He had seemed sincere about it, like he really was done with Seishou and his influence thanks to having to choose me over the masked man…

"I drove them apart," I said quietly. "Maybe that's why Koenma wanted _me_—to drive Ryu and Seishou apart, so they won't work together anymore. But how did he know I'd manage to do something like that? And if I wasn't in the old past, did that mean Ryu and Seishou both went after the Book together? Where did the machine come in to play if they were after the same goal—which was their goal in the past, the Book or the machine? In this timeline they're after two different things!"

Feeling restless, I got out of the tub and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around my hair so it could soak up all the water. I toweled my body dry afterward, swaddling myself in fluffy white cloth before reaching for a change of—

I had forgotten to bring a change of clothes.

There wasn't much I could do at that point, so I just wrapped a towel around my body as firmly as I could and walked out of the bathroom. On the way out, however, I spotted myself in one of the mirrors above the sinks, and I paused before going over to them and pulling my hair behind my shoulders.

"Ugh," I murmured, looking at the mark on my neck. Angry and red, the gouges made by Ryu's teeth looked like they were about ready to crack and bleed, and in the middle of the ring of tooth marks a purple bruise had gathered and darkened with burst blood. It hurt when I turned my head to get a better look, and when I made the motion I saw that my right cheek and temple and the side of my jaw were discolored, ugly yellow-brown bruises making me seem like I'd begun to dab on foundation that wasn't the right shade.

"Don't you know you're not supposed to hit girls, Ryu?" I asked the mirror, wincing at the bruise his blow had left. I didn't like thinking about him, so I turned from the mirror and marched down the hall to my room, hoping no one would come along when I put my hand on the knob, hesitated, and finally went inside. I glanced at Lauren first, and then Hiei made a small noise—something caught between a grunt and a gasp—and I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. He had gone rigid, eyes locked on me while he sat leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his bare chest with fingers digging into his biceps. I saw all that in the light from the open doorway for a mere instant, because I very quickly shut the door behind me and plunged the room into total darkness.

"I forgot to take clothes with me," I said, keeping my eyes shut tight. "So, um… could you not look for a minute?"

He didn't say anything while I went into theta to summon fire to the tip of my staff, making a flickering torch. Hiei's eyes were shut, lashes brushing his cheek, and I could tell that he wasn't looking because I caught no sign of a telltale cherry flickering beneath his lids. After a few deep breaths I crossed the room to my clothes, folded neatly as they were on my shelves, and I quickly dressed myself in clean underclothes, a tanktop, and shorts. Once I was through, I hovered at the foot of my futon because I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, and then I glanced at Lauren.

_Not Lauren, Ren,_ I reminded myself. _This one's different, even if she's the same. Or something. I don't even know anymore. All I know is that I need to talk to her to figure out the differences between her world and mine. Maybe there's a clue to 'why me' somewhere in her past…_

"Hiei," I said at last, still looking at Ren in her futon, and when I tore my eyes away I found Hiei staring at me. I asked: "Do you know what time it is?"

"Early morning," he said. His eyes fell shut again. "Come here."

His command—the tone of which bordered the lands of harshness and genteel request—made me freeze. "What, why?" I blurted, and his eyes cracked open.

"I want to look at something," he said slowly, and I didn't need to ask what. The bite on my neck throbbed when I went to him and sat crosslegged on the floor, facing him with my staff lying across my knees, and he pushed away from the wall to get a little closer. His left hand, the one that didn't have the black threads of the returning Dragon twisting down his skin, lifted and reached out, hot fingers brushing my unbound hair back behind my shoulder to expose my neck. I couldn't help but shiver when the heat of his skin touched the cold bite, making it throb even more, and the nub of cold in my chest pulsed like a frozen sun…

"You didn't bite him back," Hiei said softly.

"Of course not!" How could he think that?

"Good." His finger traced the scabs and pressed lightly against the bruise; I flinched, but he didn't stop. "How did you get away?"

"Sweet saved me," I said, feeling her stir in my back.

Hiei frowned. "Sweet?" he repeated, mouthing the English word like it would cut his tongue if he said it wrong.

"Oh, um—it means 'amai' in English," I told him. When he gave me a look that very clearly said he thought I was going crazy, I added: "It's the name of my Salamander."

The perplexed frown turned to alarm. "You named it?" he asked in disbelief, finger freezing on my skin.

Annoyance made me snappish. "Her."

"What?"

"Sweet isn't an 'it', she's a 'her'," I said. "You know, a girl. And I named her on accident." I let out a low sigh. "I asked her what her name was and she told me—"

Hiei interrupted me, hand grabbing my shoulder firmly. "You mean you _talk_ to it?" he asked, confusion written all over his face.

"I talk to _her_," I said confidently. Before he could interrupt again I launched into an explanation: "I wanted to know what to call her but she didn't have a name so I said 'sweet' because it's an English expression that means 'awesome', but she liked the word so much that she demanded it be her name. So, Sweet. My Salamander."

Hiei looked down and off to one side, wheels turning behind his eyes. "I dreamed," he said slowly, "that you and the creature from the maze stood over me."

"Oh, that wasn't a dream!" I said. He looked up with wide eyes. "Something about us both grabbing my staff let you into my head—I was having a talk with Sweet and you just kind of showed up."

He didn't seem convinced.

"Really, Hiei," I assured him. "The staff is made out of her bones. Since I can talk to her inside myself, it makes sense that the staff is like... like a key into me and Sweet's shared head-space-thing." I laughed a little. "Genkai will probably be able to say it better when she finds out."

Hiei hesitated, but then he allowed himself to nod once. His thumb ghosted across the bite with a surge of heat. He said: "You were telling me that… your Salamander saved you."

I sobered. "Yeah."

"How?"

It was my turn to hesitate, but eventually I said: "It felt like Ryu was… forcing something into me. Something cold."

Hiei went very still.

"It started in the bite and moved down, I think," I told him. "It spread through me, anyway." I licked my lips, staring at the staff on my lap. "But then it got really close to my tattoo, and when it did it… backfired. Sweet roared and it just went back up the way it came, and it hit Ryu in the mouth. He was bleeding when I last saw him." I paused. "It came out of the tattoo, too. Ryu's chest was burned."

"He wasn't wearing clothes?"

I met Hiei's hard eyes, ones that looked about ready to kill something. "It was just his shirt, Hiei," I assured him. "He had on… uh, pants." I couldn't take the intense expression on his face and looked away, feeling my cheeks heat up. "The bite is all that happened."

"It's not," he said, and the hand on my shoulder cupped the side of my face. The action startled me, making me jump a little before leaning into the warmth on instinct. "He hit you."

"I'll heal," I mumbled into his palm. I tried to smile, lips brushing the insides of his fingers. "But Ryu, well, he'll have some scars. Sweet got him good."

Hiei's throat worked when he swallowed, eyes travelling down to look at my staff.

"I want to look at your tattoo," he said, and the hand dropped from my cheek to his knee.

"Say please," I told him, and he just scowled while I turned around. My tank top left most of the tattoo bare, but Hiei still felt the need to push my hair forward to fall against my chest before he slipped the straps of the tank top down my arms and tugged the shirt down around my ribs. I yelped and tried to lift my arms to get the straps back up. "Hey, what are you doing?"

"I want to look at all of it," he said, forcing them down again. Hot hands touched the clasp of my bra, the band of which covered the lowest few inches of the tattoo. "This, too."

"And that's where I draw the line, buster!" I said, pulling away a bit. Things were going far too fast for my tastes, and—

His hands closed around my upper arms. "I'm not going to try anything, idiot!" he snapped, stilling me.

"Hiei—"

"Dani," he said. Hiei didn't often use my name, but when he did I couldn't help but listen, especially when he used his I-need-you-to-know-this voice. The hands on my arms tightened, but not uncomfortably. "I am _not_ going to hurt you!"

My head whipped over my shoulder to look at him. The stark honesty in those words, in his eyes… I didn't know how to handle it. He sounded raw when he said it, like it wasn't something he ever said… which I suppose he hadn't, given his history.

"I won't hurt you," he repeated, and I turned to look forward again.

"I'd better do this before regret kicks in," I told myself in English, and I reached behind me to unhook my bra. I kept the front of the shirt pressed tight to my chest and bowed my head, trying not to think about what I was doing because it was just too awkward.

I felt Hiei's hand lift from my left arm and alight on my skin a moment later, tracing the lines of the tattoo softly. His right hand still gripped my bicep. Sweet hummed inside me, pleased at this development, and the hairs on my arms and neck stood up at the contrast of the cold air and his hot touch.

"It's warmer than the rest of you," Hiei said suddenly, breath misting between my shoulder blades.

"You don't say," I ground out.

"I do."

"It's an expression."

He chuckled. "I know," he said.

"Yours is colder than you," I blurted, remembering the way the black lines and scars had felt when I cleaned him. The rest of him burned hot, but the Dragon…

"Mine?"

"The Dragon."

Suspicion, a touch of anger, confusion… "How do you know about that?"

"Sweet told me," I said. Talking helped me ignore the way Hiei's touch felt as it continued to bump over the rise and fall of my tattoo's twisted skin. "She can sense him. The Dragon, I mean."

"It's not a 'him', it's an 'it,'" Hiei snapped. His voice was not nearly as soft as his touch.

"That's not what Sweet says," I said.

"What does it know?" he said.

"Sweet is a 'she'—"

"I don't know what it's been telling you," he interjected, voice dripping with derision, "but I took the Dragon into me to gain its power. I don't talk to it, I don't care what it thinks, and I most certainly didn't _name_ it."

I pulled away from him completely, twisting to face him on my knees. He looked bored. I felt livid. Sweet felt like she was growling out an earthquake in the back of my head.

"Wow, Hiei," I said, looking at him down my nose. "I knew you could be a jerk, but that was a new low."

"What are you talking about?"

"'And I most certainly didn't _name_ it,'" I quoted, mimicking the way he'd sneered. His eyes opened a little wider. "Does that make me a fool for naming mine, or what?"

Lips parted over his clenched teeth. "I don't know why you'd name it," he breathed. "It's only a means to an end, a—"

"Hey, Sweet saved my life!" I said. "I'm not going to treat her like a tool!"

"But that's what it _is_," Hiei argued. "The Dragon, the Salamander—they're _power_. You use them. It's the nature of the contract!"

"Contract?" I repeated. "What contract? I killed Sweet and now she's alive inside of me—I think I owe her a good new life after taking her old one away!"

"You don't owe her anything," Hiei growled. "I don't owe the Dragon anything, either."

I snored. "Yeah, well, that sure seems to work for you, now doesn't it?"

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Well, look!" I said, pointing at his left arm and the scars decorating it. "The Dragon rips its way out of you like you're nothing but meat! I bet if you treated it more like I treat Sweet, you wouldn't have so many scars!"

The very thought seemed to disgust him. "I am not going to make _friends_ with it!" he snarled, and I reached behind me to rehook my bra, movements jerky and stiff.

"Maybe you should try it sometime," I snapped, sliding the straps of my shirt back up my arms. "It might be good for you, because this whole antisocial-and-loving-it thing isn't very flattering."

"You don't seem to mind!" came his retort.

"Yeah, well, I'm a fool, remember?" I said as sweetly as I could, and I stood up. My staff supported me all the way to the door, but as I opened it Hiei appeared beside me in a flash and slammed it shut with his fist.

"Where are you going?" he demanded.

I did my very best to keep my voice down. "Getting breakfast," I grumbled, "which I _can't do_ if you don't move."

"You're angry," he said.

"_You're_ stating the obvious."

"We have different opinions," Hiei said.

"And you said I was a fool for having mine!"

"No, _you_ said that!"

"I didn't hear you denying it!"

"Woman!" he growled. "I don't think you're a fool!"

"Then I have no reason to be angry, and you have no reason to keep me locked up in here," I said, coating each word with honeyed poison, and Hiei let out another low growl before dropping his arm and stepping back. I smiled and went out into the hallway, and when Hiei didn't follow me I stomped off toward the kitchen.

And you know what? I _was_ mad. Even though it was just a difference in opinion, I still felt betrayed. Of all people I figured Hiei would know what it was like to have something living inside of you, but no, I was a fool for ever thinking I could get along with Sweet as a companion!

_It's OK, Sweet,_ I told her when I felt her keen with grief in my head, mourning Hiei's rejection with visceral pings of pain. _He's just a jerk and he and his Dragon can go bicker in a corner. We'll be fine. Who cares what they think!_

To answer that: _I_ cared. I wouldn't admit it to myself, but I did. Hiei not liking Sweet was a huge blow even though it shouldn't have mattered because it was just his opinion and he can stuff it, but I'm a girl and crazy mood swings and irrational behavior come with the territory of having a bad-tempered boyfriend, I guess. Still, I was in a horrible mood when I threw open the kitchen door to find grey light creeping in the window and Kuwabara, Kurama, and Genkai sitting around the kitchen table.

"Anything to eat?" I asked with forced cheer.

"Ramen for breakfast," Kuwabara said. "And hey, Dani, finally up?"

"Mostly," I said when I took a seat.

"Dude, your face is messed up," Yusuke said when he put a bowl of ramen on the table and slid it in my direction. Chopsticks and a spoon followed. He had been standing by the stove, apron-less but still tending to the pots bubbling there.

"Ryu hit me," I said, cracking the chopsticks and tucking in. "Good ramen, Yusuke."

"Wait, Ryu hit you?" Kuwabara asked, leaning across the table to peer into my face. "Ugh, nasty bruise. You should get Yukina to heal it!"

"I will when I see her next," I said.

The door to the kitchen creaked open, and I didn't say anything as Hiei—now dressed in different pants, boots, and a fresh shirt—walked around the table and sat next to Kuwabara. Kuwabara gave the fire demon a "What the fuck?" look (Hiei _never_ sat by Kuwabara if he could help it), but no on remarked on Hiei's presence until Yusuke asked him if he wanted ramen.

"No," Hiei said, eyes on me. I carefully did not return his gaze, the ramen arresting all of my attention, and then Genkai asked me a question and I had somewhere else to focus.

"Koenma has asked that you write a report on everything you did in Demon World," she said. "Can you do that?"

"I can if I have a pen and some paper," I said. "But why can't I just tell you guys?"

"Because it's easier if we get it all on paper," she said. She reached into the front of her robe and pulled something out of it, which she tossed onto the table faster than my eyes could follow. "There. Will that work?"

I tentatively reached to pick the object up, only to find that it was a very typical five-subject, spiral-bound notebook with a red cover and nothing of note to set it apart from the dozens of other five-subject, red, spiral-bound notebooks I'd seen in my life. A ballpoint pen had been shoved into the looped metal hinge, and the book was bound in the Japanese way so I'd have to write starting from the right instead of the left. Other than that it was normal—painfully, ordinarily normal.

But if it was so normal, why couldn't I stop staring at it?

"Something wrong, Dan?" Yusuke asked.

"No," I said, touching the cover. "No, nothing."

For some reason the sight of that totally normal notebook filled me with… recognition. There was no reason for it because the notebook was perfectly unobtrusive and so damn _commonplace_ that it shouldn't have triggered anything at all, but as I thumbed through the pages I felt myself frown. Déjà vu so strong it made my palms sweat had me in its grip.

_Where,_ I thought, _have I seen this before?_

Genkai took a loud sip of her tea, startling me out of my reverie. "Koenma also wants you to write down everything you can about Ren and your relationship to her," she said over the lip of her mug. "Can you do that, too?"

"Sure."

"Also everything you learned from the Grand Mother about the Bright Ones and the culture of the Sisters," she said. "The more details we have on them, the closer we come to learning what Seishou wants."

I carefully put down my chopsticks. "Actually," I said, watching the noodles swirl in my bowl, "I have a theory on that one."

The room became very quiet.

"I won't be able to confirm anything until Ren wakes up," I added, looking at Genkai with apology. "It's just that… well, Hogosha mentioned something, and I think it might be important."

"Well don't just sit there hinting at it—tell us!" Genkai snapped.

"Fine, fine!" I said, throwing up my hands. "She talked about Seishou looking for some machine thing and how the Bright Lady and the Bright Ones are the 'keys to its operation.' I thought about it and, well, the Americas were destroyed by some weird doomsday technology, and I just thought…"

"You thought Seishou might be after the technology that destroyed America," Kurama said in his typically silky voice. Green eyes calculated and sized me up, making me fidget.

"Right. But I have no idea what Ren—I mean, I have no idea what the Bright Lady has to do with the machine," I said. I smiled wryly. "The Grand Mother mentioned that Ren's mother had something to do with the whatever-it-is that destroyed America, and she also said that Ren had something to do with the creation of the pods themselves, but I don't remember if any of that is true. Then again, I don't remember a lot of things I probably should know about, like how we got in the chrysalises or anything like that, so…" I shrugged and picked up my chopsticks again. "I have bits and pieces of a story, but the most important parts are missing."

"Will Ren be able to fill them in?" Kurama asked.

"I don't know. Probably." I took a bite of noodle and broth. After I swallowed I said: "When she wakes up I'll ask her what she knows."

"No you won't," Genkai said. I dropped my chopsticks on accident when I looked at her, and everyone—everyone but Kurama, that is—seemed as confused as me. My blood ran cold, however, when she spoke her reasons. "Even though you've proved yourself trustworthy, we have no idea what you and Ren could do when reunited. For all we know, Ren could be an old ally of Seishou's."

"That's impossible," I said.

"Is it?" Genkai asked. "Kurama filled me in—Seishou was a Bright One, or at least, he was in a pod like a Bright One. It's possible that he and Ren could have worked together before America fell."

My heart thudded behind my eyes, making my temples pound. "But we didn't know anyone like Seishou back then!" I protested. "Ren and I, we weren't—"

"It's also possible that _you_ and Seishou knew each other, but you simply don't remember," Genkai said with utter calm. "Did you ever think of that?"

I hadn't, and so I gaped at her.

"Talking to Ren could jolt a memory into being," the old psychic continued. "Until we figure out your allegiances and what your reappointed contact with one another will do, we're keeping you apart."

"That sucks!" Yusuke griped. "Dani missed Ren! She cried when she saw her! You can't just keep them separated!"

"We can and we will, Yusuke," Kurama said. "There isn't any other choice."

I thought about that for a few moments. No one said a word, but Kurama and Genkai exchanged a look and a nod. Obviously they had been discussing this behind my back.

"I get why you're doing it," I said at last. "But just so you know, I don't like it at all, not one—"

I stopped talking, struck by something new.

"You don't have to like it," Genkai said dismissively. "You're not important enough to—"

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news," I cut in, "but you can't actually keep us apart."

Kuwabara blinked owlishly. "Wait, what?"

"I said, you can't keep us apart," I told them. I began to eat, satisfied. "You can't. Simple as that."

"And what makes you say that?" Genkai asked. "If you're going to start harping on the power of friendship—"

"Do any of you speak English?" I deadpanned. Genkai went quiet, glaring at me, and I turned to my meal. "Nope. It's just me and Ren." I smiled at Hiei, who did not look happy. "I mean, you could read her mind and all, but even then will you understand what people say? Or does understanding just come with it?" When Hiei said nothing I shrugged. "And besides, once you've read her mind and gotten everything you can out of it, who's going to explain things to her? Who's going to take care of her? Who's going to tell her that she's ten thousand years in the future and everyone she's ever known and loved is dead? She doesn't speak a lick of Japanese and she might be the best mathematician I've ever met, but her personality…" I shook my head slowly. "You won't be able to handle the Ren I used to know. It's a talent very few possess."

"Handle her?" Kurama murmured.

I nodded. "Yeah. Handle her. There isn't another way to describe it." I pushed away from the table and stretched. "Thanks for the meal. I think I'm going to go back to bed."

"One question before you do," Genkai said, stopping me by the door. "Where is the gas mask?"

I tried to respond and found that I couldn't. Where the hell _was_ the mask? Ren had been wearing it last, and…

"Ren was wearing it when we left the Grand Mother," Kurama said. "I noticed midway through the journey back that it had vanished. Do you know why that is, Dani?"

"I'm… I'm not sure," I said. "I didn't take it away deliberately, if that's what you mean."

"I surmised as much," Kurama said. He looked to Genkai. "I think she may have let go of that illusion when she wanted to see Ren's face. She kept looking at her face on the trip home."

"The subconscious has a major influence on illusions," Genkai said. Her wrinkled eyes locked on me. "Sloppy, Dani." My cheeks colored. Genkai smirked, then waved a hand at me and closed her eyes. "Go back to bed, and take the notebook with you," she said. "Work on it if you find the time. We'll discuss Ren later."

"Sure," I said, distracted again by mention of the notebook. "Sure, that's fine."

Hiei stood up when I did, but I hardly noticed because my fingers and palms tingled when I picked up the notebook. My anger at Hiei faded to the background as I walked out, allowing me the ability to ignore the way trailed through the hall behind me, because that damned _notebook_…

There was no question that I had seen it before. I just had to wonder: WHERE?

* * *

NOTES:

_Dani and Hiei needed a good fight, I think._

_The bite will be handled soon. The fight interrupted Hiei's train of thought. _

_More on Ren to come, because she'll wake up soon. WHAT?_

_And remember kids, a gun shown in the first act must be fired in the third. _

_I just want to say that I'm really, REALLY sorry this chapter came a day late—there is so much going on right now, first and foremost being a death in the family. My uncle passed last Friday and I had to fly home to help my mother prepare the funeral. She's the only one who kept up with him over the years due to family drama, and it hit her really hard. I did a lot of the work, but that was good because there was no way Mom could have done it by herself._

_This chapter comes better late than never, I suppose, but still, I am so sorry this is late and I'm sorry if it's choppy—I wrote most of it on the plane from Chicago to Dallas. Next week will be right on time, I promise._

_Also, you probably noticed that I deleted the last short chapter, added it to the beginning of this one, and reposted it. I just hated having a short little thing in the middle of such long ones! I hope no one minds. -_-; _

_I'm somewhat depressive at the moment. Hence, fights between lovers. Yay._

_Thank you SO MUCH, reviewers of chapter 54! It was the highest reviewed chapter I've ever posted for whatever reason, and you're all rock stars! J.d.y., Wings of Silver Rain, Kai-Chan94, Kaiya's Watergarden, Off-Color, sweetyjg, MusicFiend666, Moldy Strawberry, DoilyRox, TallyYoungblood, Vermillion-Skies, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, leahbee, SpiritFox821,AkaMizu-chan, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares, Willowleaf2560, Angel of Randomosity, Takara Rose Oizumi, Kaelyn Marie, The Tokyo Time Killer, LupinePhyre909, hieisdarkdragonchick, Koryu Elric, Zetsubel, yumchaitea, Raging Lulu, Mihakuu, itsallaboutbob, etowa-ru, Masuyo Shun, chocolateluvr13, Supreme Baka, Yoko Kiara14, ImMyOwnNoOneElses, Ry171819, MikaUchiha666, cranberryben, Eggbert 3000, Favorite Character, rya-fire1, unknown player, FoxgirlRay, LadyxAbsinthe, Dude wheres my spirit gun, American Senpai, rain chant, AmoreVampiresv-v, DaAmazingMeepers, SilverMoonKitty,Katt Jeane, Wolf-Cry-Night, Cheshire Blue Kitten, colbub, ShadowFireFox13!_

_Also many thanks to the reviewers of the last chapter, because all of your "get well soons" despite the brevity of the chapter made me feel loved and safe and secure, which was exactly what I needed last week. Thanks so much, and pleas know that you're awesome. Kai-chan94, ephermeral violet, chocolateluvr13, DoilyRox, j.d.y., LeahBee, WillowLead2560, AkIrA121, MusicFiend666, itsallaboutbob, lilmickey2008, Supreme Baka, Snubbed, Yoko Kiara14, TallyYoungBlood, Cheshire Blue Kitten, spiritfoxxx821, Wings of Silver Rain, Kajihenge Yoko, AkaMizu-chan, Kaelyn Marie, xXxFlawlesslyImperfect, Koryu Elric, Angel of Randomosity, Moldy Strawberry, Asking Alice, loser94, rain chant, hieisdarkdragonchick, TurtleKidtheWoolgatherer, Kaiya's Watergarden, dumbrat, Snowgirl7589, dudewheresmyspiritgun, The Tokyo Time Killer, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares, etowa-ru, Anon, Ketsurui Kazutaka, cranberryben, American Senpai, AmoreVampiresv-v, TakaraRoseOizumi, Takara Hiramota, Catreana, Wolf-Cry-Night, Goddess of the Sun, Smiles-and-Bubblegum, masuyo shun, Rurouni209, LadyxAbsinthe, nani san, lostmoonchild, rya-fire1, , shadowfirefox13, Jagg Bright Heart, spiritfoxxx821, Katt Jeane!_


	56. Chapter 56: Teeth

Future Talk

Chapter 56:

"Teeth"

* * *

I walked down the hallway to my room without seeing much of the world around me, and when I got to my door I went inside, sat down on my futon without closing the door, and tossed the red notebook onto the floor at the foot of my bed. Ren slept next to me, face composed and serene, but I barely even looked at her because the notebook took most of my attention. I stared at it for a good two minutes before taking a deep breath that shuddered in my lungs; I reached and made to touch the glossy cover when someone behind me spoke.

"What's wrong?"

I jumped, startled, and when I turned I found Hiei standing in the open doorway at my back. He had one hand resting on the doorframe and one foot posed as if to step forward, but he didn't come inside—probably still stinging after our little argument, no doubt, which the sadistic part of me was happy about. The part of me that realized he was giving me space in which to cool off was grateful to him, and my anger softened in the wake of that (grudging; very grudging) gratitude and my lingering confusions.

_That damned notebook…_

"I forgot you followed me," I muttered in English, turning back to the notebook. I had been so distracted by my feelings of déjà vu that I had ignored the sound of his feet striking the floor.

"What did you say?"

"I said oh, hey Hiei, what's up?"

"I don't believe you."

"That's because I'm lying."

He did not seem amused when I looked at him over my shoulder, lips pressed into a thin line and cherried eyes hooded as he stared in my direction. The hand not pressed into the doorframe clenched beside his thigh.

"Hey," I said, voice dropped a bit softer. "Can I ask you something?"

"You just did."

I rolled my eyes, reached for the notebook, and tossed it at him. He snatched it out of the air almost too quickly for me to follow and stared at it, brow furrowing.

"When you looked at my memories," I said, "did you see _that_ anywhere?"

He looked at me, eyes edging into the territory of should-I-be-worried. "What do you mean?"

My lips pursed. "I just... I don't even know." I threaded my hands through my hair, staring down at my lap. "I just feel like I've seen that thing before. It's like… I don't know."

"I don't remember it."

I glanced over my shoulder again, hands falling from my hair.

"I don't remember it." He was looking at the book and frowning. "There were books _like_ this in your mind, but those memories were unimportant and hazy, and they didn't show _this_ book." Eyes rose and met mine. "If it doesn't mean anything, the memory won't ring true."

"Then you didn't see that book in my head?"

"No."

I put my head in my hands again. "I'm going crazy."

"Dani."

I froze at the sound of my name. He obviously wasn't happy, and I steeled myself for whatever he was preparing to dish out. I could take it, I knew I could, I could give as well as get—

Hiei surprised me with the quietness in his voice. "We need to talk."

"We _are_ talking," I told him, not giving him the same courtesy.

"Not how we should be."

"Well, what do you suggest?"

"You're angry with me."

"Yeah, and?"

"There are bigger things to worry about. We need to talk about them."

Realizing that staring down at my crossed legs wouldn't get me anywhere with Hiei, especially when he sounded so insistent, I twisted around so I faced him. "Sit?" I asked, gesturing at the futon, and he hesitated for a fraction of a second before taking a seat in front of me. He set the notebook between us, one leg stretched out on my right with the other pulled close to his chest with his elbow resting on it. He always sat like that; it was his classic Hiei pose.

"What bigger things?" I asked. I met his eyes boldly; no use hiding now.

Eyes flickered toward my neck. "The bite," he said. "I wanted to discuss it earlier but your… pet, proved to be a distraction."

"I'd prefer 'partner' over 'pet,'" I said stiffly, and Hiei visibly withdrew.

"We'll discuss that later," he said. _Thank Buddha,_ I thought. "It's unimportant in comparison."

"To the bite?"

"Yes." He paused, staring at my neck, and then he asked: "What did it feel like?"

"Painful," came my swift reply. When Hiei didn't look convinced, I said: "What's that look for?"

He paused again, and then, with clipped articulation, he asked: "It wasn't pleasurable?"

The starkness in his face made me go rigid. It took a good minute of floundering to find a response, because what the _heck_ was Hiei getting at?

"No!" I snapped, glaring at him, and then I went red across the face and had to look away. "_No_, it wasn't pleasurable! It was a bite, Hiei—teeth in my neck, pain, blood, _not good_!" I put a hand to my face, pulse picking up. "Why the hell would you ask me something like that?"

Tone emotionless, he asked: "So it hurt?"

"YES!" My other hand covered the remaining half of my face. "Oh my god, I'm not a masochist! The whole pain and sex thing just isn't… oh my god, Hiei, _no_!"

Sweet suddenly piped up, disagreeing with me in her quiet way, and I was immediately appalled.

"Oh you shut up!" I snapped, hand jerking over my shoulder so I could touch the tattoo. It buzzed hotly beneath my fingers. "This is not open for discussion!"

"Who are you talking to?" Hiei asked. I looked up to find him looking… well, he looked amused and confused, but under that was something else, something coiled and smug and heated, something I couldn't really name.

"Sweet," I told him. "She… well, she doesn't agree with me. About the pain thing." I started blushing again and hid my face in my hands yet another time. "Ugh, why me? Why me all the time?"

"I might be able to tolerate your parasite after all," Hiei teased. I glanced up, mouth dropping open because had Hiei just made a _joke_?, and he smirked until I reached behind me to grab my pillow and chuck it at him. He managed to catch it; all I could manage was a glare.

"Moving on, now!" I commanded. "The bite felt like a bite and I didn't like it, OK?" I shivered, feeling that odd little chill beneath my breastbone throb. "I still feel cold, just thinking about it," I said, wrapping my arms around my torso. "It's like I—"

"Cold where?"

"Oh, um, here," I said, pressing my fingertips to the spot. "It's just a—"

I didn't expect Hiei to rocket forward and grab me by the upper arms, but he did and pulled so we were nose to nose. Teeth bared behind his snarling lips, he hissed into my face: "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?" I asked, stunned into complacency by his actions, and Hiei let me go. I fell back and almost fell over, and then I _did_ fall over because Hiei had put his hands on my shoulders and shoved me, hard. I hit the futon with an 'oomph' and gasped when Hiei grabbed my shirt and wrenched it up, exposing my stomach and ribs and bra, and I tried to pull his hand back down but I couldn't budge him no matter how hard I tried. His other hand caught both my wrists before I could so much as blink and pinned them to the futon next to my face, and when I yelled "What the _fuck_ are you doing?", he just growled and leaned down until his face pressed into the spot I'd told him felt cold. Breath steamed over my skin for a second, and as I broke out with goosebumps and tried to wrench myself out from under him—somehow my legs and hips had gotten pinned—he growled against my skin and lurched off of me, jumping to his feet before blurring out the door in a flash of heated black.

I lay against the futon for a minute, utterly stunned with my shirt still bunched beneath my armpits, and then I sat up and pulled the shirt into its place. It took a minute for thoughts to form, but when they did they slammed into my brain with all the force of the tidal waves.

_What the hell was that about! _I fumed._ I mean really, Hiei just manhandled me!_ The anger that had earlier dissipated rushed back in. My hands fisted in the futon's covers. _He just… he just ripped my clothes off! That, that _jerk_ has some explaining to do!_

I didn't have to wait for an explanation for long, thankfully, because Hiei blurred back into the room a minute or so later. He stood in the doorway with wild eyes and I stared at him with eyes that were, I hoped, demanding an explanation, and as we traded glares and stares Kurama came striding down the hall. He entered the room and murmured something to Hiei, and then the fire demon shot him a glower and walked out.

"Will someone tell me what's going on?" I asked, giving Kurama a pointed look. He grimaced in response and, after glancing at Ren, sat with his back against the wall near her head. Her soft snoring prompted an amused look from the fox demon, but then he sobered and gave me his attention.

"Hiei explained what Ryu did to you a few minutes ago," he said, nodding. "Am I safe in assuming he's left you in the dark?"

I snorted. "More like the dark side of the moon. I have no idea what's going on."

"Ah," he said, thinking about that. "I see." He paused. "Hiei thought he knew what was going on, and he thought that the issue had all but handled itself, but then you revealed something that complicated matters."

My eyebrow rose. "What, the fact that I need a sweater?" I asked. I touched my cold spot on reflex.

"Don't be coy, Dani," Kurama warned. Something in his deep green eyes made my skin crawl; what was coming was not good, not good at all, that much was as certain as Kurama's outlandish hair color. "This is a serious matter."

"Well, maybe I'd treat it as such if I actually knew what was happening to me!" I protested.

He pinned me with a viridian glare. "Ryu marked you," he said. "It's a demon custom that claims one demon as the property of another." He leaned forward. "Do you understand what that means?"

It took me a minute to process his words, because when he said the word 'marked' I felt myself freeze even though on the inside I was screaming, because marked, _marked_, that was, that was—

_Oh my god,_ I thought-screamed._ Oh my god, OH MY GOD, this is the biggest fanfiction cliché in the entire goddamned world! It's in stupid OC YYH fics, it's in Inuyasha fics, oh my god THIS IS SO DUMB! How the hell did I not see this coming?_

It was true, of course. I'd read tons of fics that dealt with demons (demons like Hiei and Kurama, in fact) biting their loved ones to show their interest, leaving wounds that were supposed to be sexy or sensual or something, but the idea of germ-encrusted teeth breaking my skin had always freaked me out so I'd made a habit of skimming scenes that dealt with such, uh… activities. Frankly, despite the prevalence of the 'marking' concept in Yu Yu Hakusho-OC fiction, the idea creeped me the hell out. I mean, pain? Who the hell wants _pain_?

Feeling very much like an idiot, I tried to cover my inner turmoil with an ignorant expression (_I'm so stupid stupid stupid!_ I kept saying to myself; _I should have seen this coming from miles away_!). Eventually I managed to grit out: "Um, people will see the bite and know I'm… taken?" I then began to grasp at desperate straws I didn't know for sure existed. "But the mark will heal and I can always wear a scarf or something, so why does it even matter?" _Please let the bite just be a bite and not something more serious, please, please, PLEASE—_

"It's not just a physical mark, Dani," Kurama said.

_Dammit. _My worst fears had been realized.

His voice turned gentle. "The cold in you… it's Ryu's energy. He's branded you from the inside out."

I stared at him, uncomprehending because I didn't want to believe it, nuh uh, no freaking _way_.

"The wave of cold you felt when Ryu bit you," he explained when I said nothing. "It was his energy."

I swallowed, mouth dry. "And?" I said softly.

Kurama's eye twitched in leashed frustration; I was being dense and I knew it. "And when you told Hiei that the Salamander in you forced the coldness out," he patiently explained, "Hiei assumed that none of Ryu's energy remained in your body. The cold spot, the one you mentioned… it's a pocket of Ryu's energy."

"… and?"

Kurama passed his hands through his hair, eyes falling shut. "I suppose it would be impossible for you to understand the gravity of this situation without knowing what a mark truly means," he said.

"So explain?"

Eyes snapped back open. "There are many kinds of marks demons exchange," he said. "Some are mutual, with both parties biting the other and injecting a portion of their power into their partner. Lovers often exchange these, though siblings and close friends might also indulge. The ones between siblings are charged differently than the ones between lovers, but I'll cover that later."

"And what do these marks do, exactly?" I asked. _Oh god, please let it be something other than sexual, because that's how it usually is in fanfics and if that's true then I'm screwed! LITERALLY!_

Kurama smiled a little, but it seemed forced and it did not touch his calculating eyes. "The exchange of energy means more than the physical biting," he said. "In the case of a mutual marking, the injection of power would allow the two parties the ability to sense one another's emotions and locations, among other things. The bite itself merely shows that the possessor holds a close tie to another demon."

I thought about it—the fanfics had made the marks sound exclusively sexual, but this was a new spin I hadn't anticipated. Then, face turning the color of a strawberry, I had to ask: "Why did Hiei ask me if the bite felt, uh…" I had to look away, unable to face Kurama and speak the awkward truth.

Luckily, Kurama was smart enough to figure out what I wanted to know. "The shared mark allows two demons to feel what the other feels," he said. "In sexual situations, it can be a potent stimulant."

_So the fanfics got something right after all…_ "You're awfully casual about this," I muttered, still not looking at him, and he chuckled.

"If it didn't feel good when Ryu bit you, then the nature of the mark isn't sexual," he said. "You need not worry about that. You do not possess a mutual mark, after all, since that would entail you biting Ryu in return." A pause. "You didn't do that, of course?"

"Of course not!" Then the floor fell out from under me—if the thought of being bitten disgusted me, then the thought of biting someone _else_ was even worse. "But, if I don't have that kind of mark, what kind _do_ I have?"

"The not-mutual kind," he said. His veneer of calm only made me more nervous. "It's typical between master or servant, or slave and slaver."

"And I'm the slave in this case, right?" I asked. My head drooped, eyes falling shut. "Oh my god, this isn't happening."

"It is," Kurama stated. "With Ryu's energy inside of you, he will be able to sense much about what you see and experience here at the temple." Tact turned to unyielding brutality. "This is a breach of security, of course, and it needs immediate remedy," he said silkily. "Though Ryu's energy will eventually dissipate on its own, we do not have the luxury of time. I trust you will cooperate when I describe the appropriate measures of fixing this little problem?"

I stared at him, pushing my hair out of my eyes with the heel of my hand as I processed everything. Sweet hummed with comforts in my back, but they did little to calm my rushing nerves. This was just too much to handle!

"You mean, I'm even more of a liability than usual?" I said hollowly. "Ryu can… sense me?"

Kurama gave me a slow nod, one that made my chest clench in dread. "Potentially. You wounded him when your Salamander attacked; I do not know how well he can access his powers at this point."

"Well damn," I said, and I spun around and crawled over to the shelves with my clothes. Someone had put my backpack from Demon World near them, and I quickly tore it open and began to stuff clothing into it.

"What are you doing?" Kurama said, standing so he could walk over to me. I didn't look at him, pulling on socks and shoes before tugging a sweatshirt over my head. I put on the backpack and grabbed my staff after that, lurching upright before striding out of the room as fast as my crippled self could scurry.

Hiei was in the hall, naturally. I almost ran into him. He looked angry and snarled when I tried to walk past, moving to block my way, and I stopped so I could sigh and glare and say to Hiei and Kurama (who had followed me into the hall): "Let me go, you two. I have a plan."

"Where are you going?" Hiei demanded, but rather than answer I just tried to walk by. He slammed a hand onto the wall to block my way, but I ducked under it and moved on. Both men dogged my steps, each battering me with questions and, in the case of Kurama, pleas to go back into the temple, and I didn't pay either of them any attention until it was absolutely necessary.

It became necessary because Hiei got too physical to ignore. He darted in front of me when I got halfway across the courtyard, and before I knew what was happening he had wrenched the staff out of my hands, shoved his shoulder into my gut, and hefted me so I got tossed over his shoulder like a sack of foul-tempered grain. I yelped out a curse as he zoomed back to the temple porch and dumped me onto the red wood, and when I recovered from this indignity, sore butt and labored breathing and all, I shouted: "Holy crap, what the hell was that? You don't just steal a cripple's cane, you jerk!"

"What are you trying to do, Dani?" he snarled, staff clenched tight in his fist. Kurama stood a little behind him, looking both amused and serious at the same time (I have no idea how he managed that feat of facial engineering). "You can't just run off!"

"I'm not running off!" I yelled back. I got my feet under me and stood, taller than both boys thanks to my perch on the porch. "Kurama, you said I was a liability because Ryu can sense what's going on through me, so the only thing I can do is get out of here!" I tossed up my hands in frustration. "I'm going to go camping in the woods until his energy wears off, just like you said it would, and the sooner I get out of here the safer all of you will be, OK?, so just let me go out there because if I don't leave—"

"There are other ways to deal with this, Dani," Kurama interjected, chiding me like an affectionate parent. "I was about to tell you about them, but then you decided to run out of the room and—"

"Hey, it's a solid plan!" I snapped. "I'll rough it in the woods for a few days and we'll all be fine. I'm not going to be the reason everyone gets killed!"

Kurama's mouth dropped open for a second, and then he smiled. Glancing at the livid Hiei, he said: "Hiei, let Dani go her own way."

Those cherry eyes of his seemed more like blood right then. "Are you insane?" he growled. "Out there, she won't even last a day!"

"Hey!" I said, offended. "I'd last a lot longer than a day!"

The redheaded fox demon and the irate fire demon both ignored me.

"Then accompany her and explain the method of rectifying the situation we are in favor of," Kurama said smoothly, and Hiei's glare vanished into surprise, which then turned into a smirk of satisfaction. The odd and abrupt transition left me confused, confusion that only grew sharper when Hiei handed my staff up to me and turned toward the woods. I took the staff with trepidation; Hiei's smirk didn't usually mean good things for me.

"Come on, Dani," he tossed over his shoulder, the indigo in his hair catching the sun, and he walked off into the trees.

I looked at Kurama for an explanation, but he only chuckled and tossed his hair. Garnet glittered with the motion—and what's with boys having cooler hair than me, anyway? I'm a shapeshifter; maybe I should add in some green or something…

"Go, Dani." He laughed, snapping me out of that odd train of thought. "With this, you'll get your way and Hiei will have a chance to have his." When I made no move to follow the fire demon into the woods, he added: "It's a compromise. Life is full of them."

"Not with Hiei," I deadpanned.

Kurama seemed regretful. "Yes, he does have trouble taking 'no' for an answer…" Green eyes glittered with glee I didn't understand. "In this case, however, he will respect whatever you have to say, so go. He will keep you safe."

I didn't say anything as Kurama climbed the porch stairs and breezed past me, and when we were abreast he murmured something in a low voice, so low a voice I had to replay the moment in my head several times to figure out what he said.

"You'll want to hear what he has to say—odds are, you'll enjoy it very much," were his glossy words. Infuriatingly, I had no idea what they meant.

* * *

Hiei wasn't in the woods when I finally worked up the nerve to go into them, and I wandered for roughly twenty minutes before finally having my frustrations boil over. I stopped hiking in the middle of a copse of orange-leafed trees, looked around me, and then yelled: "Hiei, where the _hell_ are you?"

"Here."

I spun, cursing, because Hiei had appeared behind me without a sound. Despite the briskness of the day (it was autumn, I supposed; what month was it, anyway?) he wore only a cutoff shirt and pants, arms left bare to the wind and watery sun. I was a bit chilly in my sweatshirt, though not terribly so, but Hiei…

_A perk of being a fire demon, I guess_, I thought, looking at the hands shoved in his pockets and his lazy stance. _Dammit all, I'm useless._

"Wanna tell me what Kurama was yakking about back there?" I asked, trying to appear just as casual as Hiei. I'm sure I failed, but whatever—so long as Hiei knew I was still mad at him, I would be OK.

His head tilted to one side, eyes trained on me with no recognition of my anger. He said: "You look older with your hair loose."

My cheeks colored on reflex; I had forgotten to put my hair in pigtails after my bath. "Not the point, Hiei," I said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear in a fit of girlish self-consciousness.

He turned to trees around us. "Too close to the temple," he said. He looked at me without turning his head, eyes moving while the rest of him kept still. "I thought you wanted to distance yourself."

My mouth worked. "I do," I finally said, and to prove my point I turned on my good heel and started walking. I didn't know where I was going, of course, but I tried not to think about it as I picked my way over roots, around patches of thorns, between trees, around boulders… Whistling between my teeth helped pass the time, but I grew short of breath very quickly and had to stop to rest against a tree more than once.

Hiei didn't reappear during my journey, one which lasted a good hour or so if I was estimating time correctly. I was glad for that considering all that was running through my head—I still smarted over the talk of Sweet, his rough treatment of me (_First he rips my shirt off and then he throws me around like a doll! _I reminded myself every few minutes), not to mention the fact that he was being a mysterious little, little… I don't even know what.

_He and Kurama are evil_, I decided at some point. _I'm not letting them have a playdate, ever… speaking of Kurama!_

The thought came when I stumbled into a clearing, one with a very familiar fallen tree in the middle of it. _This is where Kurama found me_, I thought, staring at the fallen tree in delight. Moss had crept up the bark and a few mushrooms were growing on it, but it still felt like finding an old friend or something when I crossed to touch the lichen coating the tree like a mink stole. I climbed atop the tree with a smile and settled down, taking off my backpack so I could rest easy and stretch out my sore shoulders.

"This far enough, Hiei?" I asked pleasantly. I didn't raise my voice, but nevertheless Hiei appeared like a ghost a few yards in front of me.

"Not for your plan, it isn't," he said, and he smirked. "It's fine for mine."

I raised an eyebrow at him and pushed my hair out of my face. "Confident, are we?"

He laughed, a harsh bark of sound that seemed less like a laugh than it should have.

I pushed my hair out of my face again. "You see, this is why I always wear my hair pulled to the sides," I said when the strands fell back into my eyes. "I don't know how Kurama manages to keep his hair from getting in the way all the time; it's even longer than mine!"

"He keeps plants in his hair; no doubt they have something to do with it," Hiei said.

"You're probably right." I looked around us. Though the clearing was doubtless the one I'd been found in, it had changed with the seasons, the trees having turned to golds and yellows and reds instead of the bright greens I'd been thrown into the first time. "Funny I found this place. It's where Kurama met me."

"I know."

My eyes rolled. "Mindreading spoilsport."

Hiei inclined his head, hair and eyes and tanned skin catching the light until he almost seemed to glow. I caught myself staring at him and tore my eyes away, not wanting to give him the satisfaction.

"So are you going to tell me about your little method of fixing this, or what?" I asked, touching my throat through the fabric of my sweatshirt. "The suspense is killing me." I looked up at the sky, schooling my face into I-am-going-shoot-you-down-but-go-ahead-and-try,I'll-humor-you-just-this-once smile.

"I can chase out Ryu's energy if I marked you myself."

My smiled froze in place, eyes locked on the sky. One of the clouds looked like a rabbit, I noticed, though a rabbit that was fleeing from something in terror, and was it just me or did the cloud behind it look a lot like a dragon with a hungry mouth and—

"I'm sorry," I said, unable to look away from the spectacle of clouds. "I'm sorry, I just hallucinated: can you repeat that?"

"You heard me, Dani."

My eyes closed all on their own.

"It might take weeks for what's inside you to fade," he said. "I can kill it."

"I don't—" I began.

"I know what I'm doing," he said, voice harsh. "I know how to fix this. Ryu is a human who attempted a demon's task—don't think I'd be the same. For me it would be as easy as breathing."

I bit down on my tongue to keep from screaming at him, though I don't know what I would have said. I didn't want to get bitten again, everything inside me was shrieking in protest, Sweet tried to wrap herself around my mind like a warm blanket, oh my god, another mark would _kill me_, I was sure—

"Dani?"

"I don't," I started, and I swallowed before going on, voice haggard and forced. "I don't want to go through that again."

"It wouldn't be the same thing," he told me. "I know what I'm doing—"

"I'm sure you do," I said, because I was but the knowledge didn't make me feel any better.

"Then why not?" he pressed. His voice dropped in volume when he asked: "Is it because it's _me_?"

I twitched, body jerking in surprise and denial I felt from my toes to the roots of my hair. The thought appalled me: how could he even _ask_ something like that? Of _course_ it wasn't just because it was him! How could he ever—

"If the thought of me touching you like that is repulsive," he spat, "then stop baiting me and—"

"Hiei!"

He stopped at the sound of his name, thank whatever higher power might be listening. I lowered my head, breathing deep in the ensuing silence. Eventually I found the will to speak.

"Hiei," I said, "you would be the only good thing about the situation—the _only_ thing. Do you understand that?"

He didn't say anything.

"I have no idea what being raped is like," I told him, eyes still shut tight, "but I'd imagine it was something like what Ryu did to me. Maybe it wasn't as bad as the actual thing, but still, it was…" I swallowed again, feeling my throat constrict. Words tumbled out despite this. "It was invasive and cruel and painful, and… I don't want that to happen again. Even if it is _you_, even if you say it would be different. I just… it was awful." A shiver. "It was _awful_."

"Dani," he said.

"No, Hiei." I shook my head. "No, Hiei. The answer is no."

"I wouldn't hurt you."

I didn't open my eyes, but I did point in his general direction and attempt to smile. "You know, a part of me knows that," I said, "but the rest of me doesn't care. I don't want to get put into a situation that could turn out the way it turned out with Ryu."

"But you can trust me," Hiei said in a heated voice. "I won't let it turn out like Ryu—I won't allow it!"

He sounded so insistent, but… "Again, a part of me knows, but the rest of me just—"

"Dani, he _forced_ the mark on you," Hiei spat. "He wanted to mark you as a _slave_!"

"So?"

"So if you _wanted_ me to mark you," he growled, "it would feel very, very different."

I grimaced. "How can you be sure of that?" I asked, voice dropping low. "How? It's a bite, Hiei—it would be painful no matter the circumstances, and—"

"You're afraid."

I paused, about to protest, but then I laughed because I didn't know what else to do. "Yeah, I am!" I admitted, thinking of the pain, the helplessness, the crippling fear the thought of being marked made me feel. "I'm so afraid I could just _scream_!"

"You're afraid of the _pain_," he said incredulously. "You _live_ with pain, Dani; you were born into a body wrapped in pain! What do you have to fear from it?"

I didn't have a reply to that one; I lived with a foot that felt like glass in a world full of hammers and pain and I were no strangers, but did that really excuse me from fearing it?

Was I being a… coward?

The notion, so sudden and unexpected, was not pleasant.

"There is no happiness without pain," Hiei spat. "There is no beauty, no pleasure, no _nothing_ without pain!"

"That's not true," I whispered. "There are—"

"Childbirth," Hiei supplied, growing more agitated with every word. "Some call it the most beautiful thing in existence and it tears the mother to pieces, but she smiles when she sees her child. And that virginity you treasure will cause you pain when you lose it, but that doesn't stop you from wanting to give it away!"

Sweet burbled in my back with recognition; I shushed her with a shudder.

"And your tattoo," he went on as if he'd sensed my inner dialogue. "It's been mere days since you got it, but you're so enamored of the soul living inside you that you gave it a _name_! Would you tell me now that you regret the pain that gave you your companion—answer me, because I would really like to know if you regret Sweet because she was born in you through pain!"

My eyes snapped open, but not because that was the longest speech Hiei had ever made in my presence.

"You said her name," I said.

He regarded me with bright fire. For a second my eyes smarted in the sunlight; it seemed as if the orange and red and gold trees behind him were aflame.

"If she is important to you," he said stiffly, shoulders as tense as steel cable, "then I will treat her as such." Hiei regally lifted his chin, as imperious as any king. "Now tell me, Dani: Is pain really so frightening that you'll live isolated and alone because a second of it is too much for you to bear?"

Chest feeling numb, I said: "It's not that simple."

"Isn't it?"

"It's…" I shuddered again, nails digging into the back of the tree beneath my hands. "It's just that…"

"It's just that you're afraid," Hiei spat. "Fear keeps you alive and it can protect you—only fools lack fear. But fools are also the ones who allow fear to _rule_ them, and right now you are being ruled."

"You said I wasn't a fool earlier," I managed.

"You weren't, back then," Hiei said. His lips curled. "Now, however, my opinion is changing."

"Why?"

"Because you're letting fear take you over!" Though Hiei wasn't one for pacing or wild motion without reason, he lifted his hands as if to take me by the shoulders and shake sense into my head. He didn't touch me or come close, however, and merely said: "Fear paralyzes, Dani. By letting yourself give in to fear, you close yourself off to taking risks, and there is no progress without risk."

I cracked a snide remark: "You sound like a self-help book."

"This is no time for your jokes!" he roared, composure snapping like a dry bone. He strode forward until he stood just in front of me, eyes on level with my neck thanks to my spot on the tree, but no matter our heights I still felt totally exposed as I stared down into his face. "We're _demons_, Dani!" Hands came up and slammed onto the tree on either side of my thighs, gouging furrows in the wood. "Demons mark each other! It's in our nature! If you never face this fear you will never live up to your own urges, and you'll be a hollow shell of the demon you should be!"

"But I'm a hu—"

"_You are not a human_," he hissed. I couldn't tear my eyes away from him as he spoke, energy blazing in his pupils and locked jaw. "Stop thinking like one and face yourself—you are a _demon_, Dani. You are a _demon_ and you should _act_ like one!" He pushed away and turned his back on me, staring off into the trees as if he wanted to set them on fire. I didn't know what to say to him, didn't know how to react, _I was a human wasn't I,_ and then his eyes fell shut and his shoulders slumped in unknowable emotion.

"What if I asked you to mark _me_ some day?" he said, tone bland.

… _what?_

"What if I said I wanted to mark _you_?" he continued. Soft words turned cruel. "Would you deny us that because of your petty fear?"

I mumbled: "Is it really so important to demons?"

For once, I was the one to throw Hiei off balance. He shot me a strange look over his shoulder before features smoothed into contemplation, and then his eyes fell shut.

"It's an exchange of the soul," he said. Every syllable radiated… something. I would say 'longing', but that didn't seem like something Hiei would ever feel. "We could never know each other the way we're meant to unless marks are exchanged. Marks allow demons to _feel_ each other." His eyes opened and flashed in the sun, catching me off guard. "Demons are not creatures of attachment or affection. A mark serves as a means of showing both, without room for argument or taint."

We looked at each other for a long time, me not knowing what to say and Hiei not deigning to say anything at all. My thoughts went from numbed blankness to frantic rushing off and on, and after a moment where I _felt_ rather than thought about what Hiei was saying, because thinking was getting me nowhere in this case, I finally loosened my tongue long enough to ask: "What do you want, Hiei?"

He scowled. "What do you mean?"

"For us." I stared down at my lap. "You, me, this thing we have—what is it?"

He didn't speak.

"It's just happening so fast," I said. "We go from fighting to flirting to you wanting to _mark_ me… and I still don't really understand what a mark actually means in terms of our relationship, our thing, our whatever." I looked up at him; he seemed stricken. "What do you want for us?" I asked. "Are you looking for a fling, a companion… a wife? Because you haven't told me and I don't know how to read minds."

I glanced up at the sky because Hiei's intense expression was too much to handle just then. The clouds had changed from a rabbit and a dragon to vague shapes that showed me nothing at all.

"I don't even know what demons _do_ in relationships," I said to the sky. "Am I supposed to just jump into bed with you now that we know how we both feel, or what? And what do we even feel at this point? It's not like we've really laid it out there, and since that's the case are we supposed to take it slow, like humans would, or what? Because I'm so confused right now that I don't even…" I couldn't help but laugh, but without humor. "Do demons even _have_ exclusive relationships?"

"I do not plan on pursuing anyone else while you are still alive."

He froze me in place with those words, and the clouds started to coalesce into shapes I didn't truly see, because _what_ had Hiei just told me? I slowly lowered my head to look at him. His face was more open and honest than I'd ever seen it, mouth pressed shut with eyes that didn't hood themselves from scrutiny, and from him emanated a sense of…

"Do you actually mean that?" I said.

Hiei's head jerked in a nod, face folding back into its normal guarded set.

"So you want whatever it is we have—" I waved a vague hand, "—to last?"

His lips curled into his of-course-you-idiot sneer. "I wouldn't waste my time on someone otherwise," he said.

I processed that, thinking.

"And a mark… would happen someday, or at least come up, since you want this to last?" I asked.

"It's in your nature and mine whether you like it or not," he said. "It binds demons together. There is nothing else like it."

"Well, then," I said. I took a deep breath—

_Please, please, please don't act like Ryu, Hiei!_

—before I smiled and said: "I guess… bite me?"

* * *

_NOTES:_

_I apologize for the chapter's somewhat short length; it's midterms week and I honestly don't have time for much more than this. Plus I liked the ending. Because I'm evil._

_Never fear, though—Dani's decision to go through with Hiei's proposition and the mark will be discussed in greater detail, MUCH GREATER DETAIL, and Dani isn't through with being mad at Hiei, either. Have faith! _

_Also, yeah, I couldn't help but deal with the mark, which is probably the biggest fanfiction trope EVER. Yeah. Don't hate me too much._

_We have art! MistressXJade drew Ryu and Hogosha, which is awesome because they needed some pictures; BiGayStraightWhoCares drew several pictures of Sweet, our new lizard buddy; MyraMew drew Hiei traversing the ice fields like the champ he is; hiesdarkdargonchick made some AWESOME Future Talk banners; and I think I might be forgetting a few but I'm late to a tutorial session and have to RUN! Ack!_

_THANKS SO MUCH, REVIEWERS/PM-ers! Your support meant a lot to me, more than I can ever say, especially during these very stressful weeks. Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Moldy Strawberry, destinyswindow, nani san, Misuzu-PM, etowa-ru, itsallaboutbob, Kazumi Kuwabara, Wishing Wanderer, AmoreVampiresv-v, Masuyo Shun, ImMyOwnNoOneElses, chocolateluvr13, Eryn Goddess of Chaos, AkaMizu-Chan, Supreme Baka, j.d.y., Kaelyn Marie, SilverMoonKitty, yumchaitea, Cheshire Blue Kitten, OhhTaylorJade, Razorgaze, spiritfoxxx821, Willowleaf2560, LupinePhyre909, hieisdarkdragonchick, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Reality Bores Me, Wings of Silver Rain!_


	57. Chapter 57: These Things That I've Done

Future Talk

Chapter 57:

"All These Things That I've Done"

* * *

It took Hiei a minute or two—a very bug-eyed, open mouthed, what-the-fuck-is-this-shit minute or two—for him to finally growl: "You changed your mind?"

I shrugged, pulse fluttering in my wrists and neck.

"Why?"

"Well," I said as cheerfully as I could under the circumstances, "you just said something really fear-defying, you know, because I could have rejected you or whatever, but you faced it and stuff, so… I figure I owe you the same?" My hand went up to rub at the nape of my neck, nervous. "And… well, they say that trust is the most important part of a relationship, so I guess it's a way for me to, um… start to trust you?" I shot him a sheepish look. "You know, to trust you not to hurt me the way _he_ did?"

"… you're trying to prove yourself to me?" Hiei asked, eyebrow shooting up so hard it disappeared beneath the fabric concealing his Jagan.

"In a way," I admitted. "I don't want you to think I'm a coward for not wanting to…" I gestured at my neck. "You know, Ryu and whatnot. I still don't like the idea of this marking business and I doubt I ever will—"

"You will."

Hiei sounded quite certain about that, for whatever reason, and I had to pause to raise my eyebrow at _him_.

"I told you, mine will not feel like Ryu's clumsy excuse for a mark," Hiei said. His eyes fell to half-mast, dark and glittering and topping a smirk that made me shiver more than a little bit.

"Yeah, well, trust and stuff," I repeated, and I looked away. "If you say it's important, then I'll go through with it on faith alone." I grinned a little again, joking. "And besides, I'm not very good at the whole wilderness thing. If your mark gets out Ryu's little whatever-it-is so I can go back to a place with showers…"

A scowl. "Very self-serving of you," he said, red eyes going dark. I suppose he was mad that I wasn't just accepting the mark because it was from _him_, but hey, as uncomfy as I was with the whole affair, who could blame me for looking for a silver lining?

Or were such thoughts more human than demon, in my twisted case?

"Very _human_ of me, you mean," I said, deciding on the former. I couldn't help but frown at Hiei's resulting grimace. "And I _am_ human, Hiei."

With all the certainty of a smug child, he said: "You're not."

"No, I am," I insisted. "I might have a demon's instincts, but I have a human's mind. I was raised human. It's nurture over nature."

He frowned, but not in an angry way; he was just trying to understand. "What do you mean, nurture over nature?" he asked slowly.

"Oh," I said, "um, well, it's a psychology theory thing." I paused. "Do you really want to know, because I don't know how well I can explain and—"

"Tell me."

"OK." I took a deep breath, organizing my thoughts, and eventually I said: "I'll start with nature."

Hiei waited, expectant.

"Genetics and instinct are inborn, right?" I said. "It's in the DNA. Like, a kid with parents who are both serial killers will probably not go through life with a squeaky clean criminal record. Does that make sense?"

Hiei swallowed, but he said nothing.

_Oh god,_ I thought, realizing just what I'd implied when I saw his stiff shoulders and tight mouth, _he's probably thinking about his own parents, wondering if his dad was a killer, shit shit shit—_

To cover my discomfort, I stiffly went on in clipped tones: "Nurture, on the other hand, is the concept that the way in which a person is raised can overcome whatever their nature and genetics dictate. Like, that kid with the killer parents? Yeah, if he's raised with love, he'll be normal. The way he was nurtured overcame his nature." I licked my lips, staring down at my lap as I tried not to think about the way I might have potentially insulted Hiei. "So, um, in my case, I was nurtured like a human so therefore I think like a human, not like my demon's nature says I should. Nature versus nurture." I met Hiei's eyes and tried to smile. "Make sense?"

He scoffed, tight lips slackening. "In a very human way it does," he said, and to my immense surprise he went right down the road I had wanted to avoid. "I would have come out a killer no matter how I was raised," he said, voice infused with misplaced pride. "Nature, nurture—whatever. It makes no difference to me."

The words slipped out before I could check them; a very foot-in-mouth moment I hoped I would not regret later. "That's not true! I've never seen you running around killing things for fun—"

"You've known me for little more than a few months, Dani," Hiei snapped. "I'm vicious. Don't act like you know everything about me."

"I know enough to want you to mark me, don't I?" I snapped back.

Hiei's eyes flew open.

"And if this whole marking thing is as serious as you keep suggesting, then why would I allow myself to get marked by a 'vicious' killer?"

He swallowed.

"Yeah, uh-huh, go ahead and stare at me like I'm crazy!" I went on. "I know a guy for three months and I'm telling him to mark me, and as far as I can tell that's, like, as serious as asking him to give me a key to his apartment or something!"

"A key to his—" Hiei stuttered, jaw dropped and eyes so wide it was a wonder they didn't dry out.

I interrupted him. "That's why this whole marking business is so hard for me to wrap my head around!" I said. "Here I am, thrown into another world and then there's this guy, this _cute_ guy who, low and behold, likes me and wants me like no one's ever wanted me before, but here we are second guessing everything and you keep telling me that you're some crazy psycho killer person, but all you've ever been in front of me is fierce—not crazy, not psycho, not a killer, just fierce." There was no stopping me at that point; I was on a roll to end all rolls. "I might not know anything about your past and yeah, hey, you could be telling me the truth and you could turn around and kill Kuwabara as soon as we get back to the temple, but you've never given me reason to believe that that's going to happen so stuff your little 'I'm a killer' speeches up your ass!" I slapped a hand down onto the tree under me, moss puffing up and shredding in response. "If you want to drive me off just do it, but I'm a big girl, Hiei—I can figure you out on my own, and what I've seen so far isn't enough to put me off of you!"

The words trickled to a halt, breath coming a little quicker, and when I replayed what I had just said in my head I thought_, Oh my god, where the heck did all of _that_ come from?_ Hiei just seemed shocked, and I opened my mouth to apologize for blowing up on him—_Why the hell had I gone off like that? That wasn't like me at all!—_buthe spoke before the words could be born.

"You think you can figure me out?" he asked slowly, staring up at me with shrewd eyes.

I blinked twice before giving him a vague mutter.

"You know nothing about my past," he said (I thought: _That's what you think, buster_). A vein pulsed in his neck, eyes closing as they screwed up tight. "You know nothing about the things I've been through, so what gives you the right to _figure, me, out_?" He spat those last words, ringing acidic and corrosive in my ears, but they didn't hurt because they were aimed at me—they were aimed inward, at something I couldn't see, at _shame_. "All these things that I've done, if you knew you would look at me like—"

"I wouldn't look at you any differently at all, Hiei."

Those words, just like the ones earlier, slipped out before I could think about them, but unlike the others I didn't regret them one bit, especially not after Hiei's fists unclenched and his eyes stopped narrowing and his lips parted in gentle surprise. Open, honest shock and disbelief—was he really so surprised that I was willing, no, _wanting_ to accept him for who he was?

Had no one ever done that for him before?

I tried to channel that sudden gentleness when I continued speaking. "You're gonna bring yourself down with that thinking, Hiei," I said. "When you found out that I was from another place and that I'd lived some life apart from anything I had told you about, you didn't judge me." I paused, and laughed. "I mean, I don't _think_ you judged me. You accepted my past as a part of who I am, but it didn't change the way you look at me _now_." I smiled at him, and his mouth closed so he could roll his lips together to wet them. I said: "What makes you think I'm not capable of the same acceptance? I'll take your past, because—"

"Your past didn't involve slaughter," he said, tone lacking any sort of inflection.

"—I'll take your past in stride because it doesn't change the man you are _today_, Hiei."

We stared at one another for a long time after that, me trying to show in my face all the sincerity and earnestness I could muster, and Hiei just trying to work it all out in his head.

I wanted him to open up to me, that much was true (because a relationship based in secrets and closeted skeletons could never last, mark or no mark), and I wanted, no, I _needed_ to tell him that I knew everything already, dammit! It would make everything so simple if I could just say _look, Hiei, I know about your bloody history, Yukina, all of it, and I look at you like I do even despite what I know! You're an anime character where I come from and your past was an open book, so please, just trust me when I say that I won't run, I won't scream, _I won't leave you_ if you let me in!_

_I won't leave you, _I thought at him as we stared, grenadine on brown, sincerity on apprehension. _I will _not,leave_, _you_!_

But because I couldn't say any of that, I tried to show it in my face. I didn't blink until my eyes watered from the strain, and when I did blink my tear ducts stung. Still, I didn't change my expression because Hiei needed to see it, I just knew he did, and—

_Dear god,_ I thought suddenly. _Isn't this cliché? An OC and a canon hottie having a heart-to-heart in the middle of the woods?_

Despite the way the thought made me want to giggle, I didn't budge an inch. The moment was too precious to break for something so juvenile.

Hiei was the first to shatter our silence, chin dropping until all I could see was the top of his blue-black head.

"You," he said, "are the strangest person I have ever met."

I pulled back, mildly affronted, but Hiei only chuckled and looked at me again. He was almost smiling, though not quite—a tender smirk was what he wore, and even though I could barely see the softness there I still felt like the world had gone dim in comparison to that look.

"You want to be a human, fine," he said. "I'll keep that in mind. I'll be… _accepting_, of that much."

"Thank you, Hiei," I said, the gratitude coming as genuine as rain.

He nodded. "And you want to accept me—fine." Soft eyes hardened. "But that will happen on _my_ terms, not yours." He inclined his head to stare at me down his nose. "I won't cry on your shoulder like some human wretch, not ever, because I will not allow you to pity me, not ever. The choices I made are mine and I stand by them, because I made them in order to survive." His voice dropped into a growl. "I do _not_ regret my choices."

"Of course," I said.

"So if you think I'll confide everything in you just like that, you are sorely mistaken."

I snorted. "I think I know you better than that, Hiei."

He smirked again. I took that as consent.

"Well, good!" I chirped. "You'll put up with my humanity, and I promise you that whatever you've got in that sordid past of yours won't send me running in the opposite direction." I stuck out my right hand, grinning from ear to ear. "I'd say this conversation was really healthy for us, wouldn't you?"

Hiei didn't respond, but he did eye my outstretched hand like it was a snake about to bite him.

"Humans shake hands to seal a deal," I mock-whispered, and his eyebrows rose.

"Hn," he grunted, and he stepped toward me. Our palms connected, his larger one dwarfing mine with his fingers grazing the inside of my wrist. I raised our hands and dropped them twice.

"There," I said when I let go. "Perfect."

But even though my hand had gone slack in his, his only got a little tighter. I gave him a questioning look when I tried to tug away, but he just smirked through hooded eyes and grabbed my left hand, too, and then both hands slid up my arms to grasp my elbows. He lifted me off the log and set me on my feet (I only 'eep'ed once, for the record), standing very, very close with that smirk still pressed firmly in place.

"Um," I said, because we were nose to nose and I wasn't capable of much more. "Um. Hi."

"Hn," he rumbled, rolling his eyes.

"… hi?"

"What happened to talking like the wind?" he asked, amused at my expense.

"You're… intimidating in close quarters?" I squeaked, looking anywhere but at his face. Really, he was so _close_…

Sweet didn't mind, of course—though she had a few negative things to say about the bandages Hiei was wearing around the Dragon, and when had he had the time to put those on? While I was in the bath? Had I seen them before now?

Hiei was saying something, snapping me out of my reverie. "I'm sorry, what?" I asked, blinking.

He didn't repeat himself; he just leaned in. I thought he was going to kiss me and closed my eyes on reflex, heart going all fluttery like a moth in a jar, but a chuckle later he had veered off course and gone for the side of my head, where he nosed my hair over my shoulder and behind my ear. Lips ghosted down the side of my throat, hot and dry and smooth, and his hand came off my elbow long enough for him to tug the neck of my sweatshirt aside. A jolt of fire went through me when teeth pricked my skin, just above the sensitive spot Ryu had—

_Yusuke's gonna go nuts if he hears about this,_ I thought through a haze of something warm and languid and uncertain, but then a memory of Yusuke on the ice fields surfaced in a flash and I saw him saying _Hiei never even did anything like that with Mukuro_—

_Mukuro._

_MUKURO._

My eyes snapped open and my hands came up and landed hard on Hiei's chest, and before my brain could catch up with my body I had tried to push him away. He lurched back in surprise, mouth open and as red as his eyes…

"I'm sorry," I gasped. "I'm sorry, I—I just—I need one more thing, before!"

Hiei was clearly not a fan of this plan, as the hands clutching my elbows tightened and his mouth was so thin it seemed on the verge of disappearing. "What?" he growled, eyes roving over my faltering face. "What do you nee—"

"Who is Mukuro?"

Have you ever seen a cat notice a mouse and go utterly, utterly still, like even the rise-and-fall motion of its breathing might send the mouse running for the hills? Hiei did that, as unbending and cold as a statue underneath the heat of his skin and the fire in his eyes. I pressed my lips together and tried not to squirm as he gazed at me, unseeing and unbreakable, but then his composure _did_ break and his lips moved just enough to whisper: "You know about her?"

"You have to promise me you won't be angry," I said.

Hiei growled, but the stillness did not shatter since he kept the noise inside his chest, where it rumbled up against me like a miniature earthquake.

I pinned him with an unamused expression. "That wasn't a promise."

He hesitated, and then his eyes closed.

"I… _promise_ I won't be angry at you," he spat.

"Good," I said. "Now, Yusuke let her name slip, but I pestered him into telling me about her so it's not really his fault." I lifted a finger to stop Hiei, whose eyes had gone open and murderous. "Remember, you promised to not be angry!"

"I said I wouldn't be angry at _you_. The detective is a different story." He bared his teeth. "What did he tell you?"

"… did I just sentence Yusuke to death?"

"Depends on what he told you," Hiei growled. His eyes narrowed. "Is Mukuro the reason why you wanted to talk about my past?" he asked.

I opened my mouth to reply. I realized that I didn't know the answer. I closed my mouth again.

"Maybe… subconsciously," I said at last. "But I still think it's a valid concern even without her in the equation."

He considered this before nodding in grudging recognition.

I closed my eyes when I spoke next. "Anyway. Yusuke didn't say much, to tell you the truth—only enough to pique my curiosity."

"Your curiosity?"

"Uh-huh."

"How?"

I shrugged. "He hinted that you and Mukuro were together before you had a falling out, but he didn't know the details."

Hiei didn't deny that, which was a good thing, but he didn't tell me that Yusuke was right, either, and that _wasn't_ a good thing. "And that piqued your curiosity, how?" he asked.

Another shrug. "I guess the thought of you in another relationship made me a little… jealous." My cheeks heated up. "And I know you didn't have to tell me about Mukuro because there really just hasn't been enough time for that, but I just felt… hurt, by it." I opened my eyes but didn't look at Hiei, keeping them trained on the forest over his shoulder. "Not that that's your fault. I haven't been in any relationships, not real ones, and now that I know that you have… I feel left behind."

"Who said I was ever in a relationship with Mukuro?"

I looked at him at last, expecting a frown, but Hiei wasn't frowning at all. He seemed… well, not amused, but…

"I've been in relationships before," Hiei said with enough calm conviction to quiet down a typhoon. "None of them have led to a marking, least of all the relationship I had with Mukuro."

He seemed sincere, not blinking or looking away or anything of that sort. I processed his words and expression in mild surprise, and soon my blank acceptance turned into… somewhat giddy happiness, to call a spade a spade.

_It's just… me?_ I found myself thinking, and a slow smile made my lips curl at the corners. I tried to stop it but I failed, mouth collapsing into twitches before giving in to the spreading smile. I looked away, feeling my cheeks heat up as I beamed and tried not to preen like a cocky bird. It was difficult.

"Mukuro recruited me, and we became close," Hiei said. "We are no longer as such. You do not need to know more than that."

"OK," I said.

He seemed to find my response appropriate, because he nodded before saying: "I have never looked for anyone to share a mark with. I never valued companionship enough to care. Others have looked for things from me, but nothing came of their advances."

The thought of others coming after Hiei didn't please me, but it was better than him going after people himself, right? "Well, that's… good?" I said. I shook myself. "Only, this mark isn't exactly permanent, is it?"

He shook his head, wary of my motive for asking.

"So…" I shrugged. "So it's not like we're, you know, doing anything… binding, today?"

His lips pursed; I'd never seen him do that before and had to suppress a giggle. "No."

"_Are_ there permanent ones?"

"The mutual kinds last longer than the kind I'll give you," he admitted.

"… do you see having one of those with me, someday?"

I couldn't look at him after saying that, because it had taken most of my courage and had reduced me back into a blushing mess. Was it too soon to ask something like that? Was it too much for someone like Hiei to—

"Do _you_?" he countered.

The fifth-grader in me responded with: "I asked you first."

The hands on my arms tightened imperceptibly, heat pulsing for just a second before burning like it normally did.

"If you'll have me," he said quietly.

I couldn't help but stare at him when he said that, head jerking in his direction because oh my _god_, had he just said that out loud? The resolution in his eyes confirmed that he had and I gaped like a drowning fish for a few seconds before looking away again.

"But we need to live through this whole mess, first," he added, tone laced through with frustration and harshness. "I'm not going to sit here and promise you _anything_ when we both might die tomorrow."

That caught me off guard, but I recovered quickly enough. "Smart move," I agreed. "I'd almost forgotten about Seishou." I shrugged Hiei off of me for a second so I could tug my fingers through my hair. "We'll have this conversation again when things aren't so tense. We'll put it on the backburner, for now."

Confusion made him scowl. "You mean you're not angry?"

"At what?"

"That I'm not willing to promise you anything."

"Um, like you said, we could die tomorrow," I said. "I'm not ready to totally get together with you yet, I mean you said it yourself, we've only known each other for a month or three, and… well, we could die tomorrow." I shrugged. "We'll play it by ear until things are calmer. It's only logical, right?"

For about a minute Hiei just looked at me, eyes narrowed as if he were trying to find something hiding behind my face. I fidgeted, not sure what I was supposed to be doing, and then he chuckled.

"You're the strangest person I've ever met," he said, and he leaned in, one hand pressing to the fallen tree on the left side of my head while the other caught me by the collar and held me still, baring the mark on my neck to the brisk air.

"You said that already," I choked out when his mouth touched my skin and dragged down, a rasp of searing teeth making me shiver in a way far more pleasant than _un_. Sweet rose to meet the feeling, basking in it with little chirps and burbles of happiness, and to keep from joining in with unabashed abandon I stammered: "So, um, this marking thing, it's supposed to feel—"

I never finished that sentence, because Hiei's teeth scraped over Ryu's mark and crushed down, breaking the skin in white-hot wave of energy that made my body light up and scream. One arm came up and wrapped around Hiei's back and my head threw itself back against the tree; my other hand came up to grasp Hiei's arm, the one braced on the tree next to my head. I turned my face so I pressed into the skin of his wrist, tasting the salt and metal and evergreen there because my mouth had come open in order to join the silent noise my body made as pure warmth spilled from the bite and pooled in my flesh, cascading over me in a wave that didn't break but only grew, grew, grew—

It was nothing like Ryu. Ryu had tasted of hateful possession and anger, all cold fury mixed with madness and things I didn't want to look at straight on, a harsh light that seared me cold with righteousness that could not be dissuaded no matter the atrocities committed in its name,

Hiei, though… Hiei was soothing darkness, and life, and warmth, and purity even in sin, a slow, languid rise of sensuality that didn't hide itself behind supposed goodness or a veneer or something else. It was what it was; _Hiei_ was who he was. His energy came into me gently, like each push and pull and ebb and flow _meant_ something precious and perfect and full of hope, which wasn't what I had imagined from him at all but when I thought about it, it suited _this_, this _act_, this basic, unadorned connection of energies and essences and ecstasies.

My eyes were open. I stared at the sky, which was suddenly a much brighter color than it had been earlier, and what was up with that? Wind touched my face and I felt it in every pore; Hiei's skin beneath my lips and hand burned, but it soothed, too, and the fist I had clenched in his shirt slowly went slack as I felt his warm energy drip down my chest, suffuse my neck and chest, pool inside my arms and go lower, and—

The wave of warmth crested over my shoulders and went down my back, inching close to Sweet's tattoo, and I let out a desperate noise, telling him to go slow, to not go fast, to do _something_ because Sweet was there, _watch out for her_, and then the warmth nudged up against that portion of my skin. It swirled into the tattoo and paused because Sweet had risen up to tangle with it, accepting it as she sent out small tendrils of herself and explored it in return, crooning as she got to know the warm glow and exchanged it with a little of her own. Hiei's power paused in its descent to linger there with her until she finished turning it over and over again in her unseen claws, and when it swept past her she warbled after it, bidding it happy goodbye as she settled back into me to sleep.

Nothing so nice happened when Hiei encountered Ryu's cold, still balled up beneath my breastbone like a tumor of ice. Hiei surrounded it with a jerk and a crash, abandoning his former gentleness because this was _Ryu_, not _me_, and he had no qualms making Ryu hurt. The cold lashed out to battle him, trying to break free of Hiei's lava grip, but my fire demon just squeezed like a snake around its prey and crushed the cold spot in on itself until it imploded and fizzled out, Hiei burning hot inside me for a long instant in triumph as Ryu's cold disappeared for good.

Somehow, back in the real world, my lips managed to form words. "Thank you," I murmured, and my languid body—perfectly relaxed as Hiei finished filling everything of me with himself—began to crumple. Hiei pressed against me and held me up with his body, all needful heat and crushing force and tender solidity.

I think he may have growled in satisfied response, because this was what he'd wanted for so long.

* * *

When it was through and Hiei helped me sit, because my knees were too weak and standing didn't seem like the best option, I said: "That was… well."

"I told you it wouldn't be like Ryu," he said, sounding smug. He sat next to me, hands in his pockets with one leg bent at the knee and the other stretched out along the ground.

"Mm," I agreed. What I didn't tell him was that his mark had been a lot more sexual than Ryu's had been, or that it hadn't hurt nearly as much as I'd thought it would, or that now I had a strange spot of heat lingering in my chest instead of a horrible pocket of cold.

I didn't tell him because I got the feeling he knew all of that already. Smug jerk.

And he _was_ smug—there's no denying that. His smirk lasted for nearly half an hour and didn't fade a nick, and every time our eyes met that smirk got a little more… knowing. Probably because I blushed whenever I looked at him and couldn't hold his eyes for long. Or maybe it was the mid-marking scream I'd let loose; my throat felt raw, still not fully recovered from the bruising it took in Demon World. Every time I tried to talk I had to clear my throat first, and that damned _smirk_—

Like I said: smug jerk.

I napped a bit, leaning on the tree in peaceful respite, and once when I woke Hiei made to cover the mark on my neck. Since I'd used my pack from Demon World in my run-for-the-hills from the temple it still had a bunch of Botan's little presents inside, chief among them a pack of Band-Aids. Hiei pressed gauze to the double ring of tooth marks on my neck (the larger, faded one a lingering gift from Ryu and the smaller, bleeding one a very new piece of evidence that Hiei and I were steadily growing into something new), and over that he layered one of the jumbo-sized strips of adhesive to keep the gauze in place.

And in case you were wondering: Yes, he smirked all while he did it. The expression finally faded when I winced at his touch, and he said through grit teeth: "It hurts."

"No shit," I griped, gingerly touching the dressing on my wound.

"No, I mean—I felt it."

He looked as confused as I felt, but then his look cleared. "I can sense what you feel through the energy I left in your body," he declared like he'd just discovered a new continent.

"Neat," I deadpanned, and I poked the wound sharply. Hiei winced right along with me, though his reaction was not nearly as intense as mine (he looked like he was blinking at an annoying gnat, whereas I had to hiss to keep from yelping). Delighted by this new discovery despite the pain it involved, I poked myself again. Hiei winced once more. A third poke yielded similar results.

"Stop that!" he snapped when he finally caught on, catching my hand so he could tug it into my lap.

I lifted my other hand and poked myself. He growled and grabbed _both_ hands, holding them away from the line of fire.

"This is gonna be fun!" I said cheerfully. When he glared at me, I tried to strike a deal: "If you keep smirking, I'll keep poking. Stop and I'll stop. Get it?"

His lips twitched into another smirk. I tried to pull my hands free to poke my wound and failed because he still held them. I rolled my eyes before calling him a mean name.

He let me go and chuckled, but the smirk faded when I raised a threatening finger to my throat.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," I said, and I used the fallen tree to try and stand. My legs worked, thank whoever's listening, and I grabbed my staff and reached for my backpack. Hiei, however, was on his feet in a flash and he grabbed the bag before I could react.

"Chivalry from _you_?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You'll be weak for a while," he said, tone telling me he was satisfied with himself even though his face remained perfectly neutral, and then he winced before glaring at me. "I wasn't smirking!" he protested as my poke-finger fell from doing its duty, and I stuck out my tongue.

"You sounded conceited to me," I said, and the walk back to the temple was spent in silence I didn't really mind too much. Hiei didn't run ahead through the trees like he'd done on the way to the clearing, choosing to walk about fifty yards ahead to dictate our path through the underbrush, and I only broke the silence once to ask Hiei how long we'd been gone (a lot longer than I'd thought was the short answer). By the time we made it home the sun had started to go down, since my still-wobbly knees made the going even slower. No one came to meet us when we arrived, for which I was grateful, and no one appeared when Hiei went with me to my room (or maybe he escorted me; it was hard to tell). He handed me the bag on the threshold and did not follow me inside, but when I bent to unpack the stuff I had hurriedly stuffed into the satchel he said: "I felt her."

I looked at him over my shoulder, asking with my expression just what the hell he was talking about.

"That… lizard," he said, lips curling in distaste.

I blinked at him. "Who, Sweet?"

"Yes." He took a breath and let it out harshly, looking away with pained eyes. "It is—_she_ is more than I gave her credit for."

My heart thumped harder for a second, and I smiled. "Hiei…"

"Don't read into it," he snapped, turning into the hallway and walking off. I lurched to my feet and hopped on one foot to the door, slamming against the frame so I could grab it and swing my torso after him, but Hiei was nowhere in sight.

Even so, when I said "Sweet says 'thank you'!" into the still, dark air, I felt like he must have heard me anyway.

* * *

I was in the middle of changing clothes when Yukina opened the door, went red in the face, and retreated. I finished pulling my sweater over my head, making sure the mark on my neck was sufficiently covered, and called: "Hey, come on in!"

She seemed uncertain, but then she saw me full on and her eyes snapped wide. "Dani-san, your _face_!" she gasped, and she all but ran to me. Her hand went up to cup my cheek, glowing glacier-blue and cool as she stroked the bruises festering beneath my skin.

"I'd forgotten all about that," I murmured. "How bad was it?"

"Yellowy all over, with a little black by your eye," she fretted as she soothed me. "Kazuma-san mentioned that you were struck across the face, but I… There, does that feel better?"

It did and I told her so, but my stomach chose that second to growl. Hiei and I had missed lunch.

"Dinner is ready in the kitchen," Yukina said when I gave her a sheepish smiled. Crimson eyes went to Ren. "Does Ren-san require any healing?"

"No," I said, and my voice cracked. Without being asked, the ice apparition who was shaping up to be my best friend _ever_ gently placed her fingers against my trachea, cooling the tears and burns inside with her special brand of magic. It felt wonderful, like swallowing chilled honey and menthol and lemons.

"Oh my god Yukina, thanks _so much_!" I said, feeling my mended throat ring truer. I gave her a bow and a grin. "I owe you big time—I was afraid I wouldn't be able to sing for weeks!"

She giggled. "Not you—oh, and Dani-san, you look much older with your hair worn down like this!"

I straightened out of the bow and touched the crown of my head. "You know, Hiei said the same thing," I said. "Is this way better?"

"I like both styles," Yukina said, "though the way you normally wear it might be more practical."

"Very true," I said, eyeing a ring of hair ties on my shelves. I looked back at Yukina. "You go on ahead; I have to deal with my hair."

She smiled. "Shrimp tempura tonight!"

"I can't wait."

She left me and I set about getting my hair put into its normal pigtails, carrying the hair ties over to Ren's side so I could sit and look at her while I worked. On a whim I started braiding my hair, twin ropes on either side of my head that fell to the bottoms of my breasts. Then I crawled back to the shelves for something else.

"I look like Heidi," I mused when I glanced into the cracked hand mirror I had salvaged from the clutter in the closet when I first moved into my room. I glanced at Ren's reflection, lying still and asleep behind me. "You wouldn't care if my hair was up or down, though. You'd just call me as cute as a button and try to cuddle me to death. You think I'm pretty no matter how I look, which is the biggest piece of bullshit I've ever heard, but the crazy thing is that you _mean it_."

Because my voice was healed and itching to be used and because I had been reminded of a song, I started humming. I put down the mirror and turned to look at Ren, grinning as I crawled over and brushed the cornsilk hair out of her face. "You're hair is so long, Ren—you'd hate it if you were awake." The hair spread across the pillow like a halo. "I don't, though. You have such pretty hair; I was always got mad whenever you hacked it off." In a low voice I started to croon the words to a pop song that I knew she liked: _"You think I'm pretty without and makeup on, you think I'm funny when I get the punch line wrong. I know you get me, so I let my walls come down."_

The minute the music hit me, I knew I had to play . There was no resisting music in my case. Humming the chorus, I scrambled for the drum on my shelves and hugged it between my knees so I could beat out the rhythm, and I started the next verse after pulling music out of the stream in my soul and tossing it into the air: twangy orange guitar, popping golden snare, glittering purple streams of synth, and on top of it all the subtle harshness of bass overdone and underdone at once.

"_Before you met me,"_ I told Ren with all the love I could muster, _"I was alright, but things were kinda heavy—you brought me to life. Now every February you'll be my Valentine."_

The next part, the bridge, it came out as a plea because when I saw how she didn't respond to my voice I felt something in my heart crumble and break. Sweet jerked to life inside me, unhappy as well and whining like a scared dog, and she crooned along when we sang to Ren as one.

"_Let's go all the way tonight,"_ Sweet and I told her. My voice cracked, but not because I was in physical pain. "_No regrets, just love. We can dance until we die—you and I, we'll be young forever!"_

I went through the first half of the chorus all pulled back and quiet, because it was more for lovers and not for me and Ren. My voice came out strong, though, when I called to her with the rest of it, hoping she could hear me when I said: _"My heart stops when you look at me. Just one touch; now, baby, I believe this is real, so take a chance and don't ever look back!"_

I hardly heard the door when it creaked open, and even though I knew I had an audience I was only playing for Ren. _"I'mma get your heart racing!" _I promised her. _"In my skin tights jeans; be your teenage dream tonight. Let you put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans; be your teenage dream tonight!"_

Around me, music I'd turned to light soared. His voice seemed to have a color and radiance all its own when he spoke, saying my name in tones of deep copper and garnet red. I looked over my shoulder, eyesight blurring the figure in the doorway into an indistinct black smudge, but I knew it was Hiei when I sang: _"You make me feel like I'm livin' a teenage dream; the way you turn me on, I can't sleep. Let's run away and don't ever look back!"_

His voice cut over the music, soft and harsh at once. "She'll wake up soon," he told me.

I knew that, of course, but for some reason it could hardly sink in and I missed her so much because she was so close, so close but _asleep_, dammit, and I poured all the missing-you-badly feeling I could into the words: _"My heart stops when you look at me. Just one touch; now, baby, I believe this is real, so take a chance and don't ever look back!"_

Then the music shattered, lights exploding into oblivion because I had started to cry. The drum hit the ground with a thump and I pulled my knees to my chest, stifling the sobs in them because I didn't want to act like a baby in front of Hiei—

He was behind me in a second, arms around my body while he knelt at my back. Sharp chin pillowed on my hair, he snapped: "Stop crying."

I tried, holding it all in for five seconds before it spilled right back out.

Hiei cursed colorfully and let me go, and then his hand grabbed my wrists and made me stop hugging my knees. Before I knew it he had shoved the drum back into my lap and was pressing both my hands to its surface, glaring at me as hard as he possibly could. The ferocity in the look stopped my weeping in a second.

"Stop," he hissed, "_crying_!"

I stared at him. He pushed back and sat at Ren's feet, all glaring scowls and tense shoulders and clenched fists.

"I can _feel_ you," he gritted out from between his teeth. "I hate it when you feel like this! _Stop it_!"

I stared at him some more, until he passed a hand through his hair and cursed again.

"You're lonely and scared even though you won't admit it to yourself," he growled, glaring at the floor to spare me his expression. "Seeing her makes it worse because it's like home is right in front of you, but you can't touch it. Isn't that right?"

"Yes," I whispered.

"So play your music and make yourself happy again," he commanded, pointing at the drum. "But not the song you played for her—play a different one. Play a _happy_ one."

I didn't say anything for a second, and then I set the drum aside. Hiei's face morphed into a mask of anger mixed with confusion, but I just reached for the ukulele on my shelf and pulled it into my arms.

There was this one song I knew as I tuned the strings, still sniffing a bit, that never failed to cheer me up. It was a bouncy little song played on a solo ukulele, at first, until other instruments picked up into a raucous, jumpy little song full of life and laughter… and under it, longing. It suited my mood even as it lifted it up from despairing and back into happiness.

"_I think I'm finally learning more,"_ I sang to Hiei, _"than I ever did before; might just be delusion. And if you ever call my name I would never be the same—I've come to this conclusion!"_

"_Stop-go-heck-no-I-don't-think-so!"_ I shouted, brass and drums kicking in like tumblers at a fair_. "I just wanna be with you tomorrow, and the next day, and the next day after all!"_

"Better," Hiei said, and he smirked.

"_Hey,"_ I sang to him, _"I just wanna say you're looking very fine today, and every day. I made a wish and hoped it would come true: to be with you, to be with you!"_

The song was short but effective; I smiled after the rest of the verses and choruses played themselves out, no more tears to be had that night, no sir, and I set the instrument aside and stood.

"So, um, sorry about all that," I said sheepishly. Hiei stood, too, and moved toward the door. "Homesickness just kind of hit me."

He 'hump'ed, looking at me out of the corner of his cherried eye.

"And, um, thanks?" I added, and the eye closed.

"Come eat," he said, not bothering with a 'you're welcome', and he vanished.

I gave Ren one last, long, lingering look before following him, hunger and enduring loneliness making me crave the company that came along with food.

* * *

Everyone was in the kitchen—and I mean _everyone_. Botan and Genkai at either end of the table, Yukina, Kuwabara and Kurama on the side opposite the door, and then there was Keiko and Kenichi, too, sitting on either side of Yusuke. I stopped to stare at the two newcomers when I came in, getting a good look at the backs of their heads while they both tried to talk Yusuke's ear off at once. Kenichi babbled the way all young people do when they're around adults they admire, and Keiko seemed tired in comparison, voice scratchy and low when Yusuke tried to get her to talk to him. I could see the strain in his face as plain as day.

_Did she and Yusuke ever make up after that one fight?_ I thought suddenly. For the life of me, I could not remember—

"Oh, hey, Dani!" Kuwabara said through a mouth full of food. There were two empty spots on his side of the table, one for Yukina, who was doing something at the stove, and the other for either Hiei or myself.

Kenichi spun around in his seat at the sound of my name, bright black eyes taking me in with a small yelp of happiness. Keiko looked over too, gave me a measuring glance, then smiled. I smiled back, heart jumping because that was the first nice look she'd ever really given me and I didn't want to mess things up.

Botan, meanwhile, saw me and Hiei coming in together and blushed, hands going up to cup her face as she doubtless wondered what our kids would look like.

"You're OK!" Kenichi said, jumping out of his chair to dance around in front of me and Hiei. He didn't hug or get too close, however, until Yusuke turned, grinned at me, and said: "Lookin' good, Dan—Oh wait, I thought Yukina _fixed_ your face, my mistake."

"I could fix _yours_ if you asked nice," I said pleasantly, raising my staff in menace.

Kenichi looked back and forth between Yusuke and me, taking in the jovial mood and the jokes, and then he let out a sigh.

"They're being nice now," he whispered, smiling in relief.

I stared at him in confusion before remembering that I had been something of a pariah the last time he'd seen me. With a smile I ruffled his baseball cap. "That they are, kid," I said. "That they are."

Hiei walked past us, eyes caught on the hand I had laid on Kenichi's head. With a smirk I didn't understand he walked around the table and sat in one of the empty seats between Kurama and Genkai. I sat in the open place next to Kenichi and Genkai right across from the fire demon, who looked at me for a second before glancing at the food laid out on a myriad of plates.

"Did you have a pleasant afternoon, Hiei?" Kurama asked, delicately doing something on his plate with his chopsticks. He caught my eye and winked, crayola green flashing under the light bulb overhead.

Hiei glared at him, arms crossed over his chest, and he didn't answer as the fox began to serve up Hiei's food with an innocent smile hiding cleverness unmatched.

Genkai looked up from her tea and raised an eyebrow at me.

"It turned out fine," I told her and Kurama, loaded expression getting more than I could say aloud across, and I began putting food on my plate. "Looks good, Yukina!" I called over the sound of chatter.

"Why thank you, Dani-san!" she yelled back, soft voice not doing much to cut through the noise. "Try the tempura; it's a new recipe!"

I was about to lift the first bite to my mouth when Kenichi asked: "So, so, you went to Demon World?"

"Yup." I took a bite and chewed. "It's great, Yukina!"

"Oh, thanks!"

"Was it your first time?" Kenichi pressed, turning in his chair to face me. The kid's gangly feet kicked my chair in agitation.

"It was," I told him.

"What was it like?"

"Well, the part we were in was—"

"Hey there, let the girl eat, kiddo!" Yusuke piped up, roping him in for a noogie while I scarfed another few bites. Kenichi struggled in his grip until I touched Yusuke's arm and grinned at him.

"It's fine, Yusuke," I said. "He's just curious."

Yusuke hesitated, but then he said "if you're sure", ruffled my hair like an affectionate older brother, and let Kenichi go so he could talk to Keiko.

I hunched forward so I was more on Kenichi's level, not that it was hard considering my height. "Well, it was really cold, for one thing," I said, gearing up for a long story, "and when we went through the rift your breath would turn into snow—"

I spent a few minutes telling him all about the forest with the squirrels, with lots of hand motions and crazy faces the way kids like, and then I talked about the river. I was just about to bring up how we needed to cross it when I realized that everyone else had gone… well, quiet. I looked around self-consciously, not liking the interested stares.

"What?" I asked, fidgeting. "You're all burning holes in my back!"

Kuwabara and Yusuke looked at one another. Kurama chuckled. Hiei's eyes were closed so I don't know what he was thinking about everything, but Keiko and Botan both seemed interested and Genkai had narrowed her eyes to listen.

Kuwabara spoke first. "It's weird to hear about what happened to us like it's a story out of a book or something," he admitted. "Kinda cool, but… weird."

"I must confess to enjoying it," Kurama said, smiling. "I suppose that, as a demon, I think of such occurrences as normal, but to you they must have seemed fantastical indeed. Such naiveté is… refreshing."

"Hey," I said, offended, but then Yusuke spoke up.

"Well, it's not like she can talk for long," he said, and he winked. "You passed out after you fought the river monster, right Dan? One of us'll have to take over!"

Kenichi's eyes went wide when he looked at me. "You fought a river monster?" he asked in hushed tones.

"Sure did," I said. "We needed to get across the river and I can turn into a fish, so—"

"You can turn into a fish?"

And so it went: I described becoming a fish and going into the water, and then I talked about the weird abyss and Sioh chasing me. Yusuke and the others pitched in to talk about how they fought it off, and I talked about changing into a human and how I nearly froze myself to death. I edited the part about Hiei warming me into them just wrapping me up and putting me by a fire (ha!), and the boys went along with it without being asked. They took over after that to talk about scouting for a place to cross while I sat back to listen. It was interesting to hear what had happened while I slept, and it was even more interesting to hear them talk about getting taken away by the Sisters when we first met them. And Yusuke's descriptions of how they had to cling to the giant squirrels' tails to get flown across the river—I was in stitches!

"Dan, she was passed out when they got us, and we lost track of her after that," Yusuke said once he got to the part where the boys were all taken to the island with the house on it. "We had to follow them or else we'd have lost Dani for good."

Kenichi turned wide eyes my way. "How did you get away?" he asked.

"I didn't," I said, meeting Yusuke's eyes over my head. We grinned before he waved me onward, allowing me to take the lead. "I woke up in a new place with the leader of the Sisters, the Grand Mother—she seemed to think I was related to an old friend of hers because I'm a shapeshifter and so was her friend, and…"

The story continued. Soon Kuwabara took over to talk about going to the square, where he described the Sisters' main city. Then it was Yusuke's turn to talk about waiting around for us to come home, and then I talked about what the Grand Mother said in the assembly. I paused afterward, though, and I looked at Yusuke and Kuwabara. Kurama and Hiei seemed content to just listen (or, in Hiei's case, sleep, or whatever else he was doing with his eyes closed).

"Do you want to tell him about the Hunt, or should I?" I asked, wondering how to do this, and Yusuke jerked a thumb at himself.

"I'll do it," he said, eager to show some action. "You'll like this part, Ken, you see we—"

He described Ryu in the chamber beforehand and Sweet in all her glory, talking about running for their lives with only my hint to 'not fight' to guide them, and at once point Kurama cut in to explain the Salamanders' ability to sense emotions.

"—and then we thought we were in a dead end, totally done for, you know, and guess what happened?" Yusuke was saying.

"What?" Kenichi asked.

"Dani came jumping out of nowhere, covered in feathers!" he cackled. "She jumped from the top of the cliff and stabbed the lizard right in the eye with a sword!"

Sweet hummed a little, saddened at the memory, so I reached back to touch my shoulder blade in comfort. I looked at Hiei when I did it; his eyes were open and he was staring at me, frowning.

"What is it?" I mouthed.

His frown deepened.

"It threw her off and _boom_, Dani hit the ground! We thought she was broken into a thousand little bits!"

"But she wasn't, right?"

"Of course not—she's sitting right there," Kuwabara chortled.

Ken shot him a dirty look.

"Anyway," Yusuke said, "the Sisters started cutting the lizard up and we all went back to the island, and then there was this weird feast thing and—"

"Wait, wait, wait," I laughed, "it's _my_ turn, I have to tell him about the Bright Lady and—"

"The Bright who?" Kenichi asked.

"The Bright Lady," I said. "She's the Sisters' goddess, and she—"

"Dan?"

The room went still.

"Dani?" the voice said, silky alto going higher. It was muffled, coming from outside the kitchen—

The door behind us swung open. I jerked to look at Hiei, whose eyes blazed hot on mine.

"Dani," the voice said, no longer separated from me by a panel of wood and air. "Oh, Dan, there you are." Before I could react I heard her come forward, and then my vision of Hiei—whose sudden change in demeanor finally made sense—was obscured by a curtain of silky blonde hair. Ren had come up behind me and put her arms around my chest, cheek lying on the top of my head as she cuddled me close in greeting.

"I missed ya, darlin'," she said softly.

I swallowed. "I missed you, too," I said, hand coming up so I could curl it around the back of her head. She let out a small sigh of contentment when I threaded my fingers in her hair. "Are you… OK?"

"Uh-huh," she said, sighing again, and then she pushed away from me. She grabbed the back of my chair and jerked it around to face her with a single wrench of her arm and then she knelt in front of me. Her strange body suit was nearly opaque, so luckily she wasn't scarring Kenichi for life as she took my hands in hers and blinked up at my face, true-blue eyes swimming with tears.

"I'm sorry I didn't wake up earlier, Dan," she said, pleading with me. "I heard ya singin', really I did, but I couldn't make myself wake up. I tried, though. I promise."

"I believe you," I said, voice thick, and we stared at one another for a second before we both rocked forward, bear-hugging so tightly it was a wonder my ribs didn't crack. She kissed my cheek on the way in and cupped the back of my head, pressing my face into her shoulder (not that I needed any prompting because I had started to cry quiet tears of happiness that didn't sob or hurt me on the way out—they were pure tears, like rain, and with them came a sense of overarching peace).

No one spoke while we held each other, and the moment ended all too soon. She pulled back and I stood, tugging her up to join me—me at 5'1 and her at 5'11 made for an interesting height difference, but I hardly cared when I put an arm around her waist and smiled down at the stunned Kenichi.

"This," I said in Japanese, "is the Bright Lady, but you can call her Ren."

* * *

(massive) NOTES:

_Why hello there, Ren! It's so nice to see you conscious at last! _

_Hiei has no idea how to comfort people. And I find that hilarious._

_And you saw the mark at last. I tried to make the process a quick one. It had gone on long enough, but Hiei's little window into Dani's mind will come in handy very soon… Ugh, and sex metaphors, we had them. I'm not writing another scene like that for a long time. I'm officially sick of fluff! Damn you all! I shall take out my anger on the unsuspecting readers! (*tries to kick things and trips pathetically*)_

_I'm not a huge Katy Perry fan, but the song "Teenage Dream" fit and it had a Valentine's Day reference, so I thought it was fitting given the date. Yay for fitting! The other song was "I Have a Crush on My Teacher" by Kate Micucci—check her out because she's awesomely talented and really nice._

_Speaking of music, this chapter's title is attributed to The Killers. I worked several lines of lyrics from the song into the chapter, and I feel like it worked out pretty well. However, I feel I've gotten less attentive with the chapter titles/tie-in songs in recent updates. Does this bother you, or do you care?_

_Also, yeah, Dani's lingering humanity and Mukuro's felt-but-not-seen presence needed some major cleaning up, and I hope I accomplished that here to an acceptable extent. I mean, there's more about Mukuro we don't know and stuff, but Hiei's not the type to spill everything at once and I tried to stay true to that. Mukuro'll come around eventually, though, and we'll figure out why Hiei is no longer at her side. It ties in with something Hiei said in chapter 48. YAY FOR PLANNING AHEAD!_

_I figured that since Dani already knows most of Hiei's past, she'd be pretty chill about 'learning' it, hence why she wasn't too insistent about the Mukuro thing. Hiei needs space, after all, and I tried to show that she respects this. And yay for Hiei saying he'd consider Dani's human side and saying Sweet was more than a damned lizard! I feel like he made some good progress._

_Anywho, midterms have kind of simmered down and I'll have more time on my hands to answer reviews and respond to emails and such—yay! _

_This story is being updated early because I won't be able to get to a computer tomorrow._

_And my reviewers. They are so good to me, even when I don't deserve it. I love y'all to no end, my word! Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Wings of Silver Rain, Yoko Kiara14, hieisdarkdragonchick, DoilyRox,DanzaPalooza, Kai-Chan94, Takara Rose Oizumi, Kaiya's Watergarden, spiritfoxxx821, Misuzu-PM, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Masuyo Shun,itsallaboutbob, loser94, SillyGoddessDisco, TallyYoungblood, WishingWanderer, American Senpai, A-ninny-mouse, Koryu Elric, Angel of Randomosity, Katt Jeane, LadyxAbsinthe, 9shadowcat9, colbub, etowa-ru, unknown player, ImMyOwnNoOneElses, chocolateluvr13, FavoriteCharacter, j.d.y., Cheshire Blue Kitten, DaAmazingMeepers, , Supreme Baka, nanisan1955, montblanc, The Tokyo Time Killer, AmoreVampiresv-v, AkaMizu-chan, Reality Bored Me, Snowgirl7589, WillowLeaf2560, PhyscoticOnna!_


	58. Chapter 58: When The Stars Go Blue

Future Talk

Chapter 58:

"When The Stars Go Blue"

* * *

Kenichi in particular seemed awed by Ren's miraculous appearance, mouth gaping open in surprise, and everyone else stared at her, too—though Genkai, Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei were all sizing her up and looking at one another as if planning something sinister, and Kuwabara was looking up and down Ren's pseudo-naked body in muted horror. Yukina seemed stunned, though not in a bad way, and Keiko was confused enough to tug on Yusuke's sleeve and murmur something in a questioning tone of voice. The weight of all the stares made my skin prickle.

Ren, however, only had eyes for me, looking into my face with an expression more befitting an adoring puppy that a human woken from ten thousand years of dreamless sleep. Soon, though, Ren's infamously short attention span made her eyes wander, and she spotted the food lying out on the table with a delighted little smile.

"Oh man," she said, tone diving deep into the realm of longing. "Oh wow, that looks _good_."

"Aw, are you hungry?" I asked teasingly.

She frowned, cocking her head to one side as she stared at me. "You _weren't_ when ya got out of the chamber?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

I just shrugged. "Oh, you know me—I'm hardly ever hungry."

"True. Darlin', you eat like a bird!" Another glance at the food. "I figured people'd wanna eat when they woke up, but…" She groaned when her stomach gurgled, hunching over to clutch at herself in hungry misery. "This is ridiculous!"

_That didn't happen to me,_ I thought, watching Ren watch the food. _More proof I'm from another world and not the pods, I guess._

I came back to reality when Ren's fingers tightened on my shoulder. "So, can I…?" she pleaded, looking between me and the food in desperation.

I moved away from my chair and ushered her toward it. "Go on, eat!" I urged, and she sat down and licked her lips, only to realize a second later that the only utensils on the table were chopsticks. She fumbled with them for a second, bringing a large chunk of fried shrimp to her mouth before dropping it again with a mournful cry. Her hands weren't deft like mine and slipped all over the place.

"Oh, um," I said. I clapped my palms together. A quick foray into theta helped me summon the image of a fork, and once I managed to visualize it I pushed it out into the real world with a snap. When I opened my eyes the fork was pressed between my hands, tines digging into my fingers before I carefully picked it up and passed it to Ren over her shoulder.

She had not, apparently, seen any of my magic-working. "Thanks, Dan," she grunted, and without another look my way she began to shovel down Yukina's cooking. The chopsticks fell to the tabletop with a clatter.

I watched her eat with a smile I couldn't control, eyes roving over her waist-length blonde hair and opalescent second-skin of a bodysuit, uh, thing. Sweet sang in my back, feeding off the newfound peace and happiness I had found in Ren's reappearance. As I wiped the moisture from my cheeks I realized that I felt good, _really_ good, so good that the way everyone was looking at us… well, it ceased to matter that Genkai didn't look happy at all. She mattered little when Ren was right—

"Um… Dani?"

My head jerked toward the call of my name; I had forgotten my audience, I supposed, so caught up in Ren's comfort as I'd been that the world had just… faded. It happened a lot between the two of us.

"So, um," Kuwabara continued as he looked at Ren but addressed me. "Should we, um, you know…" Eyes slid my way; cheeks reddened. "…get her some clothes?"

"Oh, great idea!" I said, turning toward the door. I got halfway to it and stopped, looking at the others sheepishly. "Um, mine won't fit her," I said, indicating our height difference with a hand. "Can she borrow something from one of you?"

Kuwabara stood up. "Mine should work," he said, rounding the table to come to me. He shot Ren—who was still eating so fast the image of her hands blurred—a sidelong look. "But is it OK for you to leave her?" he asked.

"Yes, as you mentioned yesterday, she might have questions," Genkai said, looking at the eating woman in disdain. "Though for now she seems content enough to ignore the rest of us."

Ren, oblivious, continued to eat.

I studied the girl with a critical eye. "I think we're good for now," I eventually decided. "Ren's serious about her food. She won't even notice everyone watching her until she's feeling better."

"…seriously?" Yusuke asked, skeptical and not afraid to show it.

"Like a heart attack," I said. I smiled at Kuwabara. "C'mon. Let's go."

Kuwabara wasn't a fan of that plan, apparently. "I can go get them in case she needs you to translate," the tall psychic offered, anxious when he looked at Genkai for guidance, but I shook my head.

"No, I know her sizes," I said. I didn't wait for anyone's permission to leave through the kitchen door, and Kuwabara trotted after me after saying something to everyone else in a low voice. When he caught up he asked: "Will she seriously not notice the others?"

"Not until she's finished eating, no," I told him, smiling as I thought of Ren's comically idiosyncratic reaction to food. Kuwabara took the lead and started walking, I assumed, toward his room, so I followed without making a case out of it. "She mentioned that people are hungry when they come out of the chambers, and she's always been the type to not function well when she's hungry, so it makes double-sense."

"I guess," Kuwabara said, but he didn't look convinced.

We walked for a minute or so until we came upon a wing of the house I had never been in. Kuwabara's room was much bigger than mine (it even had an actual bed, weirdly enough) and it seemed like he must have spent a lot of time there. Posters on the walls, a corkboard with notes to himself on it, and a desk covered in textbooks and papers all claimed the space as his own, and when he crossed to the closet he pulled out a pair of khaki slacks and a white button-up shirt.

"I don't wear these much so she can wear them for as long as she wants," he said, passing the pants to me. "Will they fit?"

I shook out the pants and looked at them, mentally comparing them to Ren's body shape. "The length is good… With a belt they'll be just fine," I said, grinning in simple excitement as I folded the pants back up. "She likes her shirts baggy so I'm sure the top will—"

"You seem really happy."

I stopped short, looking up at him in puzzlement. He had gone a little red across the cheeks and was scratching his nose, body language betraying how awkward he felt in telling me that, but his eyes were… well, they seemed happy, too.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked him, grinning. "My best friend is back! I thought I'd never see her again, and now she's—"

"That's not what I meant," Kuwabara interjected. "I meant, even when you first came in to eat dinner you seemed happier than normal." He did not meet my eyes and went right on blushing. "You scowl a lot, Dani, but tonight you were… well, smiling." When I made no move to respond because _what_ was he _getting_ at?, he glanced out the open door, swallowed, and leaned close to me so he could whisper: "You disappeared with Hiei all day today, so I just assumed…"

His words stopped me in my tracks, and suddenly the little 'ping' of hotness under my breastbone burned brighter. Heat rose in my neck and ears as I mimicked Kuwabara and began to blush, trying not to think about what had happened between Hiei and I in the woods because _oh wow_, that memory was enough to reduce me to a stuttering mess.

Sweet liked thinking about it, however, and tried to force the memories on me. I shushed her and she backed off just a little bit, snickering as she mulled over Hiei's mouth and the way it—

"W-well, I, um," I stammered, and I put a hand over my face. "It's… um… oh man, I don't know what to tell you!"

Kuwabara snorted, straightening up with a pleased smile. "If you're this awkward about it, it must have been _really_ nice," he teased, poking me in the ribs.

"Oh shut up," I snapped, jabbing at him with my staff. "We just… well, we just talked and—"

Eyes glittered above his grin, twin crescents of thin black mirth. "And that Band-Aid on your neck is from, what, cutting yourself shaving?" he teased further, poking me again.

His words stopped me yet again; I did not retaliate for the poke. "You… you _know_?" I asked numbly, mouth dropping wide. "But, but who told—"

"No one told me anything, Dani," he said, smile fading. "You know how I feel about Yukina?"

I swallowed. "Yeah?"

"I asked about what it would be like to be together. Kurama explained the demon marks to me." His head tilted to one side as he contemplated the ceiling. "Though Hiei… he didn't have anything on his neck, did he?"

"_Ryu_ bit me," I said. Kuwabara's eyes snapped open in sudden horror; my stomach lurched, nauseous at the memory. "I hid the mark because I didn't know what it was and it scared me, but Hiei noticed this morning, and..."

"Wow, Dani," Kuwabara said, compassion evident in his face and voice. "That really sucks. I mean, I knew Ryu _hit_ you because I could see the bruises, but a _mark_…" He let out a low whistle. "That must have been terrible."

"It was," I agreed, and I tried to turn optimistic. "But, Hiei fixed it by marking me himself." I rubbed at the wound beneath the bandage, feeling its heat pulse in time with my heartbeats and the strokes of my hand. The motion felt… nice.

"Is that all that happened?" Kuwabara wanted to know. "Just, you know, _him_ helping _you_? With the new mark?"

I shook my head. "We talked about it beforehand because I was nervous after what happened with Ryu, and I think… well, I think we're in a good place." My lips curled in a reflexive smile. "We fought a little… well, a lot. But I convinced him of a few things and he let me in a little bit, so… we're good, I guess?" I laughed, hand dropping from my mark to hold my staff tight. "We're going to take it slow, at least. We both decided that was the best thing."

Kuwabara looked happy for me, but then his face fell. Serious eyes blinked a few times before he said: "Can I be honest with you?"

"Of course."

"I'm jealous."

The remark came out of left field and struck me dumb. "Jealous?" I repeated. "Jealous of what?"

"Of you and the shrimp," he clarified, eyes growing distant. "Me and Yukina…" He heaved a sigh. "I feel like I'm losing her," he said.

My heart all but broke at his desolate, raw tone. "Oh Kuwabara," I began, but he waved a hand to silence me.

"It's OK," he said gently. "It's just that we've never… you know. Had a talk about _us_ before." He mopped a dinner-plate hand over his face and grimaced. "Hearing that you managed to have one with _the shrimp_ of all people…"

"Communication is the key to a relationship," I said, quoting just about every love guru ever.

"Yeah, I know," Kuwabara said, because he'd probably consulted half of those gurus in his quest to woo Yukina. Sadness turned to frustration. "It's just that people keep telling me that my feelings for her are one-sided, that Yukina doesn't think of me the way I think of her, but there were a few months where she and I were together _all the time_, always talking, always…"

He trailed off and pressed his fingers to his eyes. When they dropped to his side and he looked up at the ceiling, blinking rapidly, I could see his eyes shining with something more than emotion.

"You were happy together?" I asked in a quiet voice.

Kuwabara nodded. His voice came thickly, like he was having trouble speaking. "I taught her about Human World, you know? She lived with me and my sister so she could learn, and we talked every day about, about _life_." Kuwabara swallowed, though it obviously took a lot of effort. "It wasn't one-sided back then. I don't know what changed."

Eyes turned imploringly in my direction. "Did I do something wrong?" he asked. "I just can't figure out what I've done _wrong_!"

"You didn't do anything wrong!" I said automatically, and my thoughts jumped to the conversation I had had with Yukina so many weeks before, the one where she told me about how having Kuwabara's children would kill her. I couldn't tell him that secret because it wasn't mine to tell, so what else was I supposed to say? That Yukina was distancing herself on purpose because… because she was a bitch? That wasn't true at all! She was doing it for his own good—

"I think," I said slowly, "that the two of you should talk. Not about your relationship or anything—just talk the way you used to when things were good." I smiled at his expression, one of budding hope mixed with deep-rooted melancholy. "Maybe get up early when she's making breakfast and help her in the kitchen," I suggested. "She'd appreciate it and you'd have a chance to get that connection back."

"Yeah," Kuwabara said, though his heart wasn't really in it. "I'll try to do that." He let out a growl of malcontent. "It's just, Dani, I try to talk to her and she just walks away like I'm—"

A muffled shout from down the hall: "Dani-san, come _quick_!"

Kuwabara and I both jumped, heads whipping toward the door as Yukina burst through it. Kuwabara's sadness vanished when he went to her, taking her shoulders in his hands so he could say: "Yukina-san, it's OK, we're here—what's wrong?"

Seeing them together made me happy, and my happiness only grew when Yukina gripped Kuwabara's hands and squeezed, seeking strength from him even though she looked to me with her panicked crimson eyes.

"It's Ren-san, Dani-san!" she said, on the verge of crying for whatever reason. My stomach lurched. "She's gone _mad_!"

"Shit," I cursed, striding past them with my staff tap-tap-tapping across the floor. I heard Kuwabara murmuring comforts to Yukina as I went down the hall at top speed (not that that's too fast, but whatever) and when I got to the kitchen I threw open the doors with resolve of steel.

And it was steel I needed when I saw what was going on. If I was reading the signs correctly, Ren had gotten out of her chair, leaving crumb-covered plates in her wake, and gone over to the drawers next to the sink—three of which were gaping open—to get something. That 'something' was a butchers knife. She held it in both hands and had backed herself into a corner; the others were gathered around her in a semi-circle, wary and tense as she eyed them with similar emotions etched all over her face… only, Ren appeared somewhat entertained by the whole affair if I was interpreting the light in her eyes correctly, which I pretty much knew I was.

"Now Ren, let's just put down the knife and be friends!" Botan was saying in a soothing voice as she advanced on the taller woman, hands held out in an earnest plea.

Ren, however, just looked at Botan in suspicion and _jerked_, trying to psych Botan out. To someone who didn't know her like I did, the move would have seemed aggressive. To me, though, the lunge was just one of Ren's ill-notioned games, but Botan didn't know that and fell back, saved from hitting the floor in a dead faint by Keiko's friendly arms.

"Someone stop her!" Keiko snapped. "This is _dangerous_!"

"Oh this is just _great_, Ren," I said in sarcastic English. Everyone turned toward me in a snap of surprised motion; Keiko was the only one who glared. "I mean, peachy-_frickin'_-keen! I leave you alone for _five minutes_ and look what you get yourself into!"

Ren looked past everyone at the sound of her name. "Oh, hey darlin'!" she called happily, waving in a manner so congenial it made everyone else do a double-take that would have been really funny under different circumstances. "Do you know who any of these people are? 'Cause they ain't speakin' English and it's kind of freakin' me out!"

I just glared at her. Her smile didn't falter in the slightest.

"Welcome back, Dani," Kurama said in a tone that suggested he was totally unamused. "Care to help us manage this situation?"

"Dani," Keiko said in a voice that suggested she was _also_ not having any fun. "_You're_ the one who brought this woman here!"

Botan moaned in the human girl's arms and sat up. "What happened?" she murmured, and Keiko shushed her as the girls rose to their feet, whispering with suspicious eyes cast in my direction.

Kenichi took a moment to run forward and grab the hem of my shirt in both hands. "I thought you said she was _nice_!" he shouted up at me.

"She _is_ nice," I assured him (though he did not seem convinced). "She's just freaked out, that's all."

"Freaked out—she's gone _nuts_!" Yusuke spluttered, bounding across the room to stare down into my face. "What in the world is wrong with this bitch? She got up and pulled out a knife and—"

"You probably all freaked out and scared her, Yusuke," I said, and I pushed past him to head toward Ren. Hiei and Genkai made to bar my way, but I sighed and stopped long enough to say: "I _told_ you you wouldn't be able to handle her."

"She has a knife," Hiei snarled, cherry eyes gone livid. "You're not getting near her."

"Oh _please_, I can handle Ren in my sleep," I argued, and I think Hiei was so surprised that I actually reached out to touch him of my own volition that he didn't even think of resisting. I grabbed his shoulder in my hand and pushed him just enough to get by, watching in confused amusement as his eyes got wider and his lips parted just a hair when I breezed past.

Genkai wasn't so easy. She darted between Ren and I and said: "You two could be planning a rebellion."

I rolled my eyes, unable to help it. "Oh come _on_, we said, like, ten words to each other, and you're _not_ getting that knife out of her hands without me or without hurting her." I sighed when Genkai made no move to move; I put a hand over my heart. "I solemnly swear on my soul that I'll get the knife from Ren and back off, OK?" I vowed, looking Genkai in the eye while I did it. "There, happy now?"

To her credit, Genkai took me seriously for once and took a grudging step aside.

"Thank you," I made sure to tell her, and I marched right on up to Ren. The hand with the knife in it dropped to her side and her other hand waved at me, but I stopped a few feet away and held out my left hand, palm up.

"Give that here, _now_," I growled with a 'come here' twitch of my fingers.

Ren shook her head and opened her mouth to reply.

"Ah!" I barked, cutting her off before she could even speak. When she tried again I said: "Nope!"

"Dan—"

"Ah-ah!"

"Just—"

"Nope!"

"Hey—"

"Lame-asses-say-what?"

Her brow furrowed. "What?"

"Exactly." I wiggled my fingers again. "Now gimme the knife. You're scaring the tourists."

Dealing with Ren is like dealing with a stubborn animal, in a way—consistent eye contact, insistent body language, and a commanding tone will get her to listen in ways no pleading or sweet-talking ever can (though positive reinforcement is something that also works well on her since criticism just makes her sad, but in situations like the one with a knife I'd default to being forceful any day). After a minute of intense staring she slowly raised her hand and extended it toward me, turning the blade so I could take it by the hilt (someone gasped behind us; I'm guessing Kenichi). Her pink lips pudged into a pathetic pout when I grabbed the thing and passed it behind my back. Someone took it; I didn't see who.

"You know," I said as I crossed my arms over my chest, "if you really wanted to cut your hair that badly, all you had to do was ask!"

"What are you telling her now?" Genkai asked sharply.

"How'd you know, Dan?" Ren asked, delighted.

"It's _you_, you idiot," I chided her, and to Genkai: "She got the knife because she wanted to cut her hair. She wears it short. None of you knew that when she grabbed it and probably freaked her out when _you_ freaked out, right?"

I glanced over my shoulder just in time to see Yusuke doing a pantomime of someone grabbing their hair and sawing at it. With a frown I looked over the room and narrowed in one the sinks: sure enough, hanging over the lip of one of them was a long hank of golden strands. A matching gap, I noticed for the first time, hung right next to Ren's face on the left side.

"And here I was hoping you'd go for wearing it long, Ren," I said, mourning it just a little. "You have such pretty hair."

"Hey, it gets in the way!" she said, coming forward a step. I held out the pants Kuwabara had given me and she giggled a little, holding them up to her body. "Ooh, thanks. I can finally take this suit off!"

"What's she saying?" Genkai demanded.

"She wants to change clothes," I said, and to Ren: "Um, you should do that in private, OK?"

Ren's infamous lack of modesty rebelled against me. "I can do it here no problem!" she said, leaning forward to step into the pants. A hop and a twist later she had pulled them up, hand clenched on the top hem to keep them from falling down.

"Dude, Kenichi is still here!" Yusuke yelped. When I looked, I found his with his hands clamped over Ken's face. "And shouldn't she take the suit off before she puts on the other clothes?"

"He wants to know how you're gonna get your suit off under the clothes," I said, looking back at Ren. My next words came out as a growl. "Not to mention there's a _kid in the room_!"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh c'mon," she drawled, "you act like ya don't know anythin' 'bout stasis suits."

I blinked. "Stasis whats?"

"Stasis suits. You know, _these_ things?" She let go of the pants so she could grab the material on one arm with the opposite hand, pinching it away from her skin so I could see through the misty fabric. "Temperature-adjustin' to keep us comfy durin' the sleep in the pods?"

I stared at her. I had been wondering what her weird outfit was, but hearing the name didn't ring any bells.

"You _know_," she insisted, grabbing one of the metal dots on her arm before tracing a finger down the silver line connecting it to another dot. "These little bits here shocked us to keep our muscles from atrophyin'?"

Still, I stared at her.

"My life's work?" she pressed, growing more and more frustrated beneath her playful veneer. "Stasis suits? Core components of makin' the pods function with no adverse reactions to the humans put in 'em?"

With a reluctant smile I told her: "I'm sorry, Ren—I don't know what you're talking about."

Puppy-dog eyes went hard in an instant. The shift was typical of Ren's personality, but the others didn't know that and Genkai touched my elbow. Startled, I looked down to find her regarding Ren suspiciously.

"Her aura changed," she murmured.

"Ren's a bit bipolar," I said by way of answer, and turned back to my friend. She was still wearing that calculating expression, all good humor having gone the way of the dinosaurs. Addressing Genkai in Japanese: "She's saying that the suit she's wearing was to keep her body from atrophying in the chrysalis. Apparently I should know about them, but…"

"Dani," Ren said slowly, "when you woke up, you should've been wearin' one of these."

"I wasn't," I answered, and to Genkai I said: "She said I should have been wearing one of them when I came out of the pods."

"But you were naked."

"Exactly."

"What language is that, anyhow?" Ren asked. The seriousness making her features go rigid snapped in the wake of her curiosity. "And why do you keep callin' me 'Ren'?"

"Oh, um," I said, "we're speaking Japanese."

"Oh-kaaaay..."

"And since they can exchange the 'l' and the 'r' sounds without changing the meaning of a word, they kept messing up your name." I shrugged. "'Ren' is a Japanese name, so I just figured—"

"Hey, if it works, it works." Ren laughed. "But how the heck did we end up in Japan? What happened to the revival team?"

I had no idea what she was talking about, saw the danger of pressing on, and took action. "She's asking the awkward questions!" I hissed at Genkai.

The psychic looked annoyed, then wheeled around. "Yusuke, take Kenichi and Keiko somewhere, I don't care where," she commanded. "Botan, go inform Koenma that the Bright Lady is awake and lucid."

Though the girl and the young boy looked affronted, Yusuke just nodded and grabbed their shoulders. Botan gave Genkai a quick salute. When the four of them neared the door to the hallway, it swung open. Kuwabara and Yukina took in the situation through wary eyes.

"Everything back to normal?" Kuwabara asked, looking Ren up and down. The others exited the room while he crossed to me and handed me the shirt I had forgotten to take from him, which I promptly passed to Ren. She began shrugging it on with a thrilled smile, muttering something about having clothes at last.

"Yeah, I handled it," I told him, and he looked relieved. Yukina, however, was still as jumpy as a rabbit, hovering on the kitchen threshold like she was afraid to come inside. "Yukina, I'm sorry Ren scared you," I told her with a reassuring smile, and I turned to my wayward friend with a hiss of: "Repeat after me: Gomen nasai!"

"Gomen nasai," Ren parroted obediently.

I pointed at Yukina, who flinched. "Now look at the girl with the green hair and bow while you say it!" I said.

Ren didn't fight me. "Gomen nasai!" she barked, bowing with her hair swinging in all directions. Without straightening up, she tilted her face toward me and asked: "What did I just do?"

"You apologized for being an idiot."

"Oh." She stood. "I'll have to remember how to do that!"

"Knowing _you_," I muttered, glancing at Yukina. The ice apparition looked somewhat relieved, though still on edge. "Now, about that suit…"

"Oh yeah!" Ren said brightly. She gathered her hair in one hand and turned around, exposing the back of her neck. On it lay a metal disk about the size of a silver dollar; a finger-thick strand of silver wiring ran out of it and trailed own her spine before disappearing into the neck of her shirt, the faint shadow of which I could see travelling all the way down to her tailbone through the shirt's thin white material. She pressed her index finger in the center of the circle and exhaled, and then there came a hissing sound and the silver line on her backbone rocketed upward, like a streamer of spilled paint seen in reverse. The silver strands on her arms began to back up into the dots and disappear, the clear-ish webbing of white material dissolving when the silver lines around the segments released with a pop. Though I couldn't see much through her pants or shirt, I figured that all the material was being gathered in the circle on her neck since it began to increase in size, steadily growing until it reached the size of my palm.

"Ta-da!" Ren said when the hissing stopped and the silver lines quit inching across her skin. She turned around and grinned at us, rubbing her hands up and down her now-bare arms. "You should have the command point on the back of _your_ neck too, Dani. They're permanent implants that mesh with your skeletal structure and cerebral cortex and respond to the electrical impulses of your neurons!"

"Er," I said, because I understood a fraction of the words coming out of her mouth. "Um, I don't have one, I don't think." _But shouldn't Mom's body have one since she was in the pods?_

Blue eyes darkened. "But that's impossible," she said, and she strode up to me, circled around to my back, and pushed my head forward with her palm.

"Dani!" Hiei hissed. "What is she doing?"

"Bright Ones should have silver dots like she does, she told me!" I said as Ren's cool fingers touched my nape. "I think she's checking."

"Did you just tell her that you don't have one?" Kurama inquired.

"Yeah, but for Ren, seeing is believing," I said with a sigh. "She won't back off until she's got proof; it's how she works."

As if on cue, Ren asked: "You're right, it really isn't here! And what were you sayin' earlier, 'bout not rememberin' what stasis suits were?"

I stepped away, turning to face her. "You should probably sit down for this. It's kind of a long story," I said. She nodded slowly and did as I told her, taking a chair at random.

"What are you two doing now?" Genkai asked. She took her seat at the head of the table again, recovering her mug of tea.

"I was going to tell her about how I don't remember the pods, or getting here, or anything like that," I said, sitting down next to Ren. Kurama, Hiei, Kuwabara, and Yukina sat down, too, with Hiei across from me. I caught his eye and gave him a small smile when I said: "She's wondering how we got all the way from America to Japan, too, not that I know the answer to that question."

Hiei's lips thinned, eyes growing hooded in displeasure I didn't know the reasons for.

"I don't like not knowing what you're telling her," Genkai snapped.

"I agree; I would much rather know what's being passed between the two of you," Kurama concurred.

My mouth opened to assure them for the millionth time that we wouldn't plot their early demises, but Hiei surprised us all.

"I can tell what they're saying," he said quietly, arms crossed over his chest. Cherry eyes flickered between me and Ren. "Not specifics, but general ideas. It's fine."

"How do you manage that, Hiei-san?" Yukina asked innocently.

The fire demon didn't look at her, nor did he reply. His fingers merely tightened on his biceps as he swallowed.

"He uses the Jagan, of course," Kurama supplied in lieu of an explanation from Hiei. He shot Hiei a subtle glare before glancing at my neck, right at the mark and doubtless the true source of Hiei's abilities. "Isn't that right?"

Hiei grunted, probably giving his assent (not that anyone could tell, really).

"Fine," Genkai said after a moment of silence. She did not look happy when she told me: "Fill her in. Keep it brief."

"Sure," I said, nodding, and I swiveled to sit sideways in my chair so I was facing Ren. She stared down at me with expectant blue eyes, trusting and loving and sweet despite it all. "So, where were we?"

"You don't remember stasis suits," she prompted, but then she looked around and leaned forward to whisper: "And who the hell're all these people, anyway?" Blue eyes narrowed and darted toward Kurama. "That redhead… he looks really familiar." She leaned even closer, cupping a hand around her mouth. "Like, really, _really_ familiar!"

My stomach went cold all over. _Does she recognize Kurama?_ I thought when Ren snuck a suspicious glance at him. _I mean, I didn't think YYH existed in the past, but…_

"… does he remind you of an anime character from a show we used to watch?" I asked dubiously.

Ren's hand slammed onto the table. "That's _it_!" she proclaimed, beaming, and my vision tunneled in disbelief. "He's like that one guy from that one anime—what's his name, K-something, Ku, Ka, Ke…"

_Ohmygodohmygodohmygod_—I thought, numb, but somehow my lips managed to form the word: "Kurama?"

The redhead's eyebrow rose at the mention of his name.

Ren, however, just shook her head and scowled, putting a finger to her lips in thought. "No, that's not it," she said slowly. "It's… hmmm…" Then her eyes lit up and she clapped her hands. "_Kenshin_!"

"…wait, what?"

"Yeah, Kenshin!" she said, getting up to lean over the table and get right in Kurama's face. He pulled back, perturbed, but she just grinned and poked his cheek with her index finger. "A scar right here and he'd be the spittin' image of Himura Kenshin! Y'know, that swordy guy with the backward blade thing? Man, I loved that show!"

Memories of Kurama's fight with a sickle-wielding jackass in the Dark Tournament made me want to giggle hysterically (he'd had the Kenshin-scar for all of two episodes), but I somehow suppressed the urge. _That was a close one._ "I see the resemblance!" I agreed while I tried not to vomit in relief._ I guess YYH didn't exist back then, after all. Thank god._

_Or… will it make _my_ side of the story that much harder for Ren to believe, if I tell her?_

_Wait… _should_ I tell her?_

The sound of someone speaking snapped me out of my thoughts. "Am I being spoken about?" Kurama asked, gently nudging Ren's hand out of his face. She sat down with a pout and stuck her tongue at him, but he just smiled silkily and ignored her.

"You look like a character from a show we used to watch," I told him (he said 'ah' in response). I told Ren: "His name's Kurama, for the record. He's nice and he's really smart. You might get along if you stay on his good side."

She waved despite their close proximity. "Hey, Kurama, I'm Ren!"

"…did she just talk to me?" the fox asked.

"Yeah. She told you her name." I went around the table, pointing at each person. "That's Kuwabara Kazuma, he's really nice and helpful and he was my first friend here so be sweet to him, OK?"

"Nice to meet you, Kuwabara!" Ren chirped. "Thanks for takin' care of Dani!"

The young psychic waved back uncertainly, looking at Yukina with an unknowing shrug.

"I'm introducing all of you," I told the room. A wave of nods followed this revelation, but I didn't pay them any mind and gestured at Yukina. "That's Yukina next to Kuwabara, with the green hair. She's a healer and a cook and she's awesome."

"Sorry I scared ya, Yukina," Ren said sheepishly. "And hey, what dye do you use? It's really convincing!"

_Shit, gotta explain demons,_ I thought. "They can't understand you, Ren," I reminded her.

She blinked. "Oh… right!"

"Anyway," I pointed again, "that's Genkai. She pretty much runs things around here. Kind of grumpy, but cool if you stay on her good side."

Ren waved, grinning.

"And that," I said with a final point, "is Hiei."

One black eyebrow rose, expectant.

"He's… well, temperamental?" I scratched the back of my neck because he was staring at me and it made me nervous. "Um. Be nice to him."

"Be kind to short people, got it," Ren said, head bobbing happily when I scowled. She saw the look and pouted at me. "What, did I say somethin' wrong?"

"Don't call him short," I said.

"Ooh, do you like him, darlin'?" Ren purred, dropping off the chair and onto her knees so she could wrap her arms around my waist and put her head on my shoulder. Blinking up at me, she simpered: "Want me t'back off your new honey?"

I put my palm on her forehead and shoved her away; she came back with a giggle, enveloping my waist in another hug until I repeated the push-via-forehead motion a second time.

"Be serious and sit down," I told her, and she did with a sigh.

"You're no fun," she said, crossing her arms so she could sulk. The glitter in her eye let me know she wasn't really mad.

"There isn't time for fun right now, Ren," I said, ignoring her desire to play. "You were asking about me not remembering the stasis suits, right?"

Her playful mood vanished, mouth pursing as her eyes went hard.

"The truth is, I don't remember being put in the pods, either," I said, and her lips parted in shock. "I mean, I've been assuming that you put me in the pods to save my life after I got stabbed, but—"

"Wait, what the hell are you talkin' about?" she cut in.

Slowly, because I didn't know what she wasn't understanding, I went over everything that had happened to me: "My last memory before waking up in this place was walking home from the library, the one at my college. I heard a scream and saw a girl getting… well, assaulted. I tried to help, but—" I swallowed at the memory, hating to relive it. "Next thing I know there's a knife in my ribs, the world goes dark, and I'm sitting naked in the woods when Kurama, that redhead we were talking about, finds me and takes me back here."

I glanced at her; she was staring at me without expression.

"I couldn't explain where I came from until we found you, almost on accident," I said, waiting for her to react. "I don't know how I got out of the chambers and wound up here, but I did, and these people took me in."

Still, she said nothing.

"Ren?" I asked, taking her hand. "Ren… what's wrong? Talk to me."

"Dani," she blurted, and stopped herself.

"Yeah?"

"Dani… you have amnesia."

I looked at her for a long moment. Her earnest expression made my skin tingle.

"You're missin' a lot of memories," she said. Behind those blue eyes of hers was something dark, mournful—torn. Each word appeared to pain her. "I thought it might happen to some of the subjects after extended sleep, but you… you're missin' _five years_ of memories!"

I didn't move for a second. The Grand Mother had suggested I was suffering from memory loss… but five years?

Five _years_?

When the shock of the time wore off, I said: "But… but I died, Ren. That stab, it _killed_ me."

"No. You lived through that, darlin'," she said, shaking her head like a wet dog. "That bastard punctured your left lung and you bled out so bad that your heart stopped, but they woke you up in the ambulance and got you stable. You went into a coma after that, and—"

"And you put me in the pod so I could be saved when technology was better?" I asked, desperately grasping at straws because _what_ was she getting at, there was no way that I had died in my home world but lived _so much longer_ in this one, was the universe really so unfair that it—

_I thought that my double had been put in the pod because of the stabbing,_ I thought, _or that she had been put in when she was the same age I was when I died—but she didn't. She lived… for five years? What did she do that I didn't? What was the difference between her world and mine?_

"Dani," Ren said. "You woke up after a week. You… you graduated college and became a composer."

_What?_

It struck me in a flash—that my double had had a life that was as long as mine plus another quarter of it to boot, that she had lived and done things I had never had the privilege of doing because of my death and summoning to the world of Yu Yu Hakusho, and suddenly I was overcome with jealousy of both my alternate self, and of Ren. What had she done in those five years, other than building the pods and the stasis suits? What had she seen, who had she loved, where had she been and grown and flourished?

I began studying her face in a new way. Were there lines there that I wasn't seeing that would mark the five extra years she lived, mark the things she'd seen and done with the me-that-wasn't-me? I didn't see any differences, but…

What had those eyes seen that I hadn't?

What opportunities, what _joys_, had my death robbed me of?

"Your dad fought tooth and nail to get the guy who hurt you locked up," Ren went on, hands gripping mine and squeezing. "He got what he deserved, and then some." A grin made her lips part over her teeth. "We went into the pods five years to the day he stabbed you. We thought it was hilarious, at the time."

"I… was twenty five?" I asked her, dazed, and she nodded, which left me confused. "But, but I still look like I'm _twenty_, and so do _you_!"

Ren's familiar and unchanged mouth turned down at the corners. "The pods healed the people in 'em to an extent; some age reversal was expected," she said. "You, me… everyone must've looked a little younger."

"But… five whole years?" I said. "I still act like I'm twenty!"

With a sigh she got back in her chair and put her head in her hands.

"I figured," she went on in a low voice, "before we went under, that people with trauma might do what you've done to yourself," she said.

"Trauma?" I repeated.

Ren's nod came slowly, and when she looked at me it was without any trace of humor.

"Your dad," she said. "He died when you were twenty two."

The world stopped spinning. I gaped at Ren and rocked, once, before feeling my throat swell shut.

Dad—

_Dead? _

Across the table, Hiei let out a growl of my name. "What's wrong?" he said, and the legs of his chair clattered when he stood up.

I didn't answer him.

Ren looked away, teeth grinding audibly together. "I think you might have blocked those missing years because of the pain. You grieved him for years," she spat.

I understood. That should have been enough to merit memory loss. I loved my dad more than anything. Losing him, losing him so _early_… even though I had resigned myself to the fact that he was dead in this time period, hearing that he had died made the entire world seem like it was about to split in half, and that should have been enough for the memory loss… but…

_But_…

It was Ren that tipped me off, though she was trying to keep it a secret. I could see that she was holding something back, something big, because I knew Ren and I knew that she wasn't telling me the whole story, her eyes were too distant and frank all at once, and something—

"She's saying," I said to Hiei, eyes on Ren, "that I am missing five years of my memory, and that my father died during that time." Breath made my throat scream, but I did not cry. "She thinks the trauma was what made me lose my memories. A self-defense mechanism."

"How awful," Yukina murmured.

"But she isn't telling me everything," I said, and when I looked at Hiei he was glaring not at me, but at the truth I had just learned. "She's hiding something. My dad dying…" I swallowed. "She said I lost five years of memory, but Dad must have, must have _died_ only three years into that. There are two years that aren't accounted for, before he died, that I don't have anymore."

"What are you tellin' them?" Ren asked, watching me speak Japanese without an ounce of comprehension.

"What else made me lose my memories, Ren?" I asked bluntly. She went rigid with alarm. The hand in mine turned cold. "I know you're hiding something from me. Dad died when I was twenty two, but I lost my memories at twenty." I leaned forward. "What happened in those two years to hurt me so badly?"

Ren squeezed my hand; then she jerked it free. She stood up with a curse and walked to the sink, where she braced her arms on the counter and stared out the night darkened window. Blonde hair brushed her pant line.

"Dani," she said, Southern drawl coming out more like an unoiled hinge than down-home silk, "I don't think I should tell you."

I said nothing. Hiei rounded the table and stood behind me, and I took comfort in the wall of heat that accompanied his presence. We did not touch one another, but still—just knowing he was there was comfort enough, and Sweet helped, too, her heat coiling with his in the base of my spine and shoulders.

"It's not that you don't deserve to know," Ren said, still staring out the window. "It's just that this… this is a blessin' in disguise."

She turned to me and smiled, but with all the sadness of a grieving mother.

"You were sufferin', Dani," she said softly. "You were sufferin' so bad in the months before we got in the chambers that I thought you might…"

Her teeth grit; ocean eyes closed.

"You tried to take your own _life_, at one point!" she snarled, hunching forward.

I swallowed, stunned and scared at once, and Hiei's hand touched my shoulder. I leaned back against him on reflex, and when I tried to smooth my hair I saw that my hands shook.

_These hands,_ I thought, looking at them. _These hands tried to… take my own life?_

Suddenly, I was angry. What had my double _been_ _through_? For a moment I was glad that I had been killed in that mugging, if it meant I didn't have to watch my father die and then live through the horrors Ren—my loving friend, my bestie, my brave one—only had the stomach to hint at.

_The trade off…_ I thought. _I was spared emotional agony, but I lost experiences I can never get back. My double had the opposite._

_Which was the greater burden to bear?_

Ren smiled again, crossing her arms with a wry chuckle. "What's more, you seem to have found somethin' good here, even if I don't know what that somethin' is just yet." She looked at Hiei, perceptive as always, before glancing around the room at the others.

"I'd sure hate to ruin it by bringin' up the past," came her soft voice. "You won't get it back, and knowin' would only… "

Her eyes fell shut. I whimpered, afraid of what she might say next.

"It could break you all over again," she said. Her lips twitched; I could tell she was reliving things I'd rather not see. "I never want to see you make that face again. I almost lost you twice. I won't let it happen again."

My mind reeled, churning in on itself, and I touched the hand on my shoulder for support. Hiei's fingers curled around mine in a flex of hot steel and silk.

"OK," I said, voice shaking a little. Ren looked at me with hope and agony etched all over her face. "OK, Ren. You don't have to tell me." I shivered a little. "In fact, I don't think I _want_ to know."

"What are you saying?" Hiei murmured above me.

I didn't want anyone to hear, suddenly, because… because I didn't know why. I looked around. Yukina and Kuwabara were whispering to one another and Genkai and Kurama were trading looks (after all, watching Ren and I chat probably wasn't too entertaining when we only spoke English) so I had reason to believe that our audience was limited.

"She said I tried to… hurt myself, because of the things she won't tell me that made me lose my memory," I murmured back, hoping no one else could hear.

Hiei's hand tightened around my fingers; a growl made his chest rumble.

"I'm OK with not knowing, personally," I said, and Hiei gripped my hand again. "The past is the past, right?"

"Yes," he said. My eyes were fastened on my lap, but given the direction of his voice I assumed he was looking at Ren. "Tell her if she gives you reason to hurt, _I'll_ give _her_ reason to hurt."

"She'd never do it on purpose, Hiei!" I said, twisting to look up at him in Ren's defense. He scowled. "Don't threaten Ren!"

"Wait, why was he threatening Ren?" Kuwabara said, hearing my raised voice over Yukina's softer one. The room's attention focused in one me and Hiei; he tugged his fingers out of mine so he could sit down once more.

"I think we're done discussing my memory loss," I told them all. I tried injecting my voice with a measure of confidence, and I think I succeeded since none of them posed an argument. "Ren's got a lot to learn, so we should start soon."

"What's going on?" Ren asked, picking up on my tone-change.

"Just saying we should change the subject because if I have a novel's worth of junk to catch up on, then you have an entire library," I said. I gestured at her chair. "Sit. You'll need to for this."

She sat. "For what, now?"

"You're not going to believe it at first," I warned. "So just sit back and listen. When I say I'm through you can ask questions, and after that, I'll show you proof."

Her eyes crinkled at the corner. "You know me," she joked. "I don't believe it til I see it, but go ahead and spill!"

And so I told her everything, and slowly. I explained the three worlds and the existence of Koenma in the Spirit World, the demons in Demon World, and the humans unaware of it all living in Human World (she didn't seem to buy any of it, but I pushed that to the back of my mind for later). Then I told her about psychics and how the afterlife worked, ferrygirls and all (which garnered more skepticism from my oh-so-logical friend), and I told her about how Japanese and other Asian languages had taken over the globe. It was when I started talking about how the Americas were gone, just _gone_, and how Japan was bigger on today's maps when she interrupted me at last.

"Wait one minute," she said, forehead so wrinkled it was a wonder she wasn't a grandma already. "How long has it been? Between us gettin' sealed and you wakin' me up, I mean? It'd take a helluva long time for geography and language to change like that!"

A deep breath. With all the gentleness I could muster, I said: "It's been ten thousand years, Ren. It's been a long time."

Her reaction was… to stare at me. Silently.

"I'm serious," I said. "There are hardly any records of America ever existing. Ten thousand years ago comes a story of America sinking and falling into Demon World, and then nothing."

No reaction. Then:

"Ten thousand years?" Ren asked, lips barely moving when she spoke. "Ten… _thousand_?"

"… that's what I said, yeah."

Ren stood up. Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at her.

"Ten thousand years," she said, gazing down at me without seeing anything. Shock turned to awe, lips curling in a smile. "Ten… thou…"

I had to cover my ears when she threw back her head and howled, jumping up and down and waving her arms like a little kid on a sugar high. The girl danced to unseen music and spun in circles, doing a jig and then a _handstand_ right there in the middle of the kitchen!

"…is she OK?" Kuwabara muttered to Yukina.

That's when Ren scooped me up in a hug and planted a sloppy kiss on my cheek, spinning me around until I threatened to throw up on her, I swore I would if she kept twirling, she was making me so nauseous!

"What the hell, Ren?" I asked when she put me down. I stumbled and fell into my chair; everyone else was staring at Ren with an open mouth. "I mean, what the _hell_?"

"This is amazing, Dani!" she cackled, jumping in place with floor-shaking force. Jumps turned to stationary jogging, her cheeks puffing out as she tried to breath. "Oh-man-oh-man-oh-man-oh—"

"What?"

"I designed those pods to survive _maybe_ a millennia!" she joyfully screamed, stopping her jog in order to dance. "But ten thous—Ohmigawd, _who's_ good? _Lauren's_ good! _Who's_ good? _Lauren's_ good! OH YEAH MOTHER FU—"

"Ren, calm down!" I yelled, jabbing at her with the butt of my staff. She tripped and landed on the floor, but she didn't get up and just lay there, sprawled out and laughing in happy hysterics.

"Oh man," she laughed/cried/sobbed. "Oh man. This _rocks_. The rest of what you were talkin' about sounds like total bullshit, but _man_, this science—"

"It's not bullshit!" I protested.

Ren rolled onto her stomach and flipped her hair out of her face with a sigh. "Listen, Dan," she said. "I know you're big into fairytales and stuff, but c'mon? Three worlds? _Demons_?"

"I've been to Demon World. It's where we found you," I snapped. "And Hiei is a demon!"

"More like a human with a bad dye job and contacts," Ren sniffed.

"Kurama and Yukina are demons too," I said, and I felt offended when she just rolled her eyes when I said: "And so am I, actually!"

Ren snorted, not ladylike at all. "Oh, sure you are," she drawled. "And those powers you told me about, your music and your shape shiftin', I'm sure those were—"

I didn't let her finish before diving into theta and yanking out the image of my monk parrot, slipping into the feathers and claws like a tailored glove. My over-hyped senses made Ren's stunned face stand out like it was made of neon when my eyes opened, and as I stared at her from my chair she slowly rose to her hands and knees.

"What are you doing, Dani?" Genkai asked.

"Giving Ren proof," I said pleasantly. "She's being stubborn."

"You, bird, _what_?" Ren babbled.

I leaned my elbows on my knees and pointed at Ren with one of my claws. She stared at it, unable to form words.

"You," I said, pointing at her. "Me," I said, pointing at myself. "Outside." I jerked my thumb at the door. Then I grinned. "_Now_."

* * *

I showed Ren my music in the courtyard while the others watched from the porch. She touched the downy blue feathers on my cheeks while I summoned music to the sphere at the top of my staff, lighting up the night with lights and colors as I played her song after song—our favorites, random songs she requested, and pieces I made up myself on the spot. I pulled the music out of the staff and let it swim in a sphere around us for a while, watching with a small smile as she gaped at the lights and sounds and mumbled to herself.

"Vibration of air particulates in specific minutely controlled frequencies," was one sentence I clearly caught. "But what's conductin' the vibration from Dani's conceptions into reality?"

"I told you things were different here," I said in triumph. I jerked a thumb at the others on the porch. "Hiei has a third eye and Kurama can turn into a fox. Yukina can heal with her energy and control ice, I think. Kuwabara and Genkai are psychics with really cool powers, too. Yusuke, he's strong, you haven't met him yet, and I still need to explain how we found you in the pods in the first place, there's a lot going on—"

Ren yawned suddenly, hand moving to cover her mouth. "Seems people have, aaaah, evolved in the past ten thousand years," she mumbled into her palm. "More brain capacity, more power…"

"You're probably tired," I said, and she nodded. It was pretty late, after all, since our discussion and demonstration had lasted for a few hours and it had been evening before we started. "Want to go to bed?"

She nodded sleepily as I dimmed the music-lights and made them disappear. We went over to Genkai and asked about rooms; to my surprise, she said Ren could use the one she'd slept in the night before.

"Oh, don't look so surprised," she snapped at my startled look. "We'll give her her own tomorrow, and Hiei will keep an eye on you tonight."

I glanced at him; he carefully avoided looking at me.

"That's fine by me," I ended up saying, and after a chorus of 'goodnights' Ren and I were dismissed, leaving the others to go their separate ways.

"I think that went really well," I said as we walked by ourselves to the room. I bounced along, full of energy I didn't know the source of. "They were suspicious of us being alone together, said I couldn't talk to you on my own and all sorts of stuff, but I guess they changed their minds which is weird but—"

"Dani?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

By then we had reached the room, you see, and Ren had collapsed on her futon. My chatter kept her awake until she told me to shut it, and her soft snores filled the room before I too lay down and tried to sleep.

Tried and failed, anyway. I was too jumpy to stay down, and after a few minutes under the covers I got up and, barefoot and dressed in a tank top and shorts, went down the hall to the kitchen. A cup of hot milk might calm me down enough to sleep…

Walking there, though, sobered me up, because my mind wandered onto the five years my double had lived that Ren wouldn't tell me about… what had been so bad about them that they would want to make me hurt myself?

_Warm milk, that's the ticket, _I thought, banishing the depressing thoughts. _I need to relax…_

I was not, apparently, the only one with that idea. Keiko sat at the kitchen table with a mug clutched in her hands; she stared into it with a grimace and brown eyes so red from crying they seemed about ready to fall out. She glanced up when I came in and scowled, hiding her eyes behind a gulp of tea.

"Hey," I said, feeling shy all of a sudden. This was the one person in this world I hadn't yet connected with, so…

Her reply came stiff. "Hello," she said, and fell silent.

"Can't sleep?" I asked, taking a chair opposite her.

"No." She looked me up and down. "You?"

"No, too wired."

"Oh."

"Is something bothering you?"

The words just slipped out of my mouth; Keiko did not take them well despite the apology I stammered afterward.

"Yeah, something is, actually," she said, words coated in honeyed poison. "Yusuke was just telling me about the rest of the trip into Demon World, and as far as I'm concerned, you are _nothing_ but _trouble_."

The ferocity in her chocolate eyes froze me.

"That Ren girl pulled a _knife_ on us," Keiko said in disgust. "That's not normal, and on top of that there's one madman who's obsessed with _you_ and another who's obsessed with _her_—you're putting everyone in danger, Dani, and I hope you realize that!"

"I didn't mean to—" I tried to protest, but Keiko just got up and walked over to the sink.

"I know you didn't mean to get dragged into all this," she said, voice soft and hard at the same time. "That's why I don't hate you."

I started to smile in relief, but she wheeled on me in a fury, mug crashing into the sink so hard it broke. "I just hate that you're so casual with your new friend even though the rest of us are putting our lives at risk to protect you both!" she spat, hair flying around her face like a Medusa's snakes. "What's fair about that? Huh? How is that fair to _Yusuke_?"

Ah. So she was worried for Yusuke's sake. Her other reasoning was what caught me off guard, though—was I really acting too casual under the circumstances?

_Maybe I am, _I thought, taking in her pretty face and prettier eyes, pretty even despite the anger echoed in them. _I played around with music for, like, an hour with Ren today, and Hiei and I…_

Keiko turned back to the sink, deflated by my lack of a verbal answer.

"Oh great," she said, blank. "I broke a dish."

I stared in her direction, unable to move. Through the window some tree branches rippled and swayed in a night wind, casting odd shadows over Keiko's body and working hands, shadows that—

Suddenly a larger shadow swept over the others, blotting them out in a wave of superior darkness. Keiko disappeared in the silhouette for an instant, and when it passed she looked up and out of the window. Her breathing hitched, then stilled.

"Did you see that?" she asked.

I couldn't think because suddenly I was afraid, so I stood up and walked around the table, eyes locked on the panes of glass that suddenly seemed so thin.

"Should we call the boys?" she murmured, and then the shadow swept over us once more. Her voice rose into a small scream of "Oh my god, get Yusuke, he—"

Keiko let out an ear piercing shriek when the window shattered, spraying me and her with glass shards and debris because part of the wall had fallen down, too, and I stumbled back when a dark shape—a shape like a grasping claw, a shadow, _oh my god was this Seishou come for us so soon?—_darted in and grabbed Keiko around the torso, yanking her into the air like a child's hand abducting an innocent doll from an unsuspecting dollhouse.

I leapt after her in a panic, throwing my arms around her hips and screaming out once before getting jerked out the window right along with her, cool night air making my flesh shrivel, the black shadow-hand-thing lifting us like so much chaff on the wind, the stars searing my eyes because oh, there they were, I had missed them. Pain speared the flesh of my bare calves when I scraped across the glass still clinging to the window frame, and despite this my grip was solid but then the thing holding Keiko _twisted_ and I slipped.

I hit the ground with a thud. My head hit first, temple snapping against the stony pavement with a crack I knew meant nothing good, and my vision swam when I looked up and saw a vast dark shape looming over. It clutched a shrieking Keiko in a paw as it spread its great dark wings and blotted out the stars, and as my eyes fell shut and I felt the blood on my face, I think I might have also felt the way its claws curled around my body, lifting me high into the air before darkness made the stars go blue…

* * *

NOTES:

_Title credits go to Tim McGraw._

_What was Ren talking about that made Dani's life so hard? And will we learn more about Ren's past and how the pods came into being? Find out after we get this newest CLIFFHANGER resolved!_

_Really tough time writing this week; forgive me; but you guys are awesome and I hope you liked it! Tons of talking might have made it boring, and I am so sorry._

_Updated "Speak" for those who are interested. =D_

_Peace and love and cookies to all my readers, whom I adore! Etowa-ru, The Tokyo Time Killer, colbub, Takara Rose Oizumi, Asking Alice, AmoreVampiresv-v, ephemeral violet, Cheshire Blue Kitten, chocolateluvr13, Kaiya's Watergarden, Doily Rox, spiritfoxxx821, Amber Dreamstone, Snubbed, WishingWanderer, j.d.y., Kai-chan94, Koryu Elric, Favorite Character, loser94, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Masuyo Shun, Kayo, Tally Youngblood, darkravensknight, Yoko Kiara14, rain chant, AkaMizu-chan, Angel of Randomosity, Supreme Baka, itsallaboutbob, Tsu Aurora, LadyoftheGags, Katt Jeane, Crescent Venus, DaAmazingMeepers, Reclun, ShadowFireFox13, MusicFiend666, Reiko Tsuchikake!_


	59. Chapter 59: Delirium Trigger

Future Talk

Chapter 59:

"Delirium Trigger"

* * *

It was the wind roaring in my ears that woke me, I think, but no matter the cause the results were the same—I heard air rushing over great, dark wings and the thin sound of Keiko's voice arching under it, pleading with the flying shadow to "C'mon, let us down, I'll _talk_ to him!"

Something in her tone told me I didn't have to be alarmed to feel claws the length of my leg supporting me, curling up and around my back so I lay with arms and legs and head dangling into space, eyes turned up to watch the rise and fall of those great, dark wings blot out the stars, then show them, only to blot them out again. I _should_ have been afraid, of course, to feel bone-numbing wind crush against my skin as my head pounded dully, pained from my earlier fall, but—

But I just… wasn't. My concussed brain couldn't muster up the willpower to feel afraid when the oh-so-weakly-human Keiko didn't seem scared at all. In fact, she seemed more annoyed than anything, shouting at our captor in a tone of voice that fluctuated between exasperated and pleading…

Soon enough, Keiko's beseeching words lulled me back to sleep, the trigger to my delirium.

* * *

If you've ever been kidnapped (as has happened to me on multiple occasions) you know that there are three key things that make a kidnapping successful. The first is chains (to immobilize a victim). The second is an isolated or mysterious location (to make the victim disoriented). The third is doing something intimidating right as the victim wakes up (so the damsel or drake in distress knows from the get-go that they're in deep shit). Every evil villain worth their weight in salt knows that those three components are crucial in making a kidnapping work—Ryu knew it when he abducted me at the party on the Terrace, Hogosha knew it when she took me from the ceremonial hall of the Sisters, and shouldn't the third time I was kidnapped be equally as impressive?

It seemed not. Whoever my kidnapper was this time around had missed the villainous memo. Here's how the festivities went without the proper pomp and ceremony:

I woke up on my back. My head hurt. I smelled iron and salt—blood, though whose it was I did not know. I blinked groggily for a few seconds at a shadowy ceiling, and when I remembered what had happened I quickly shut my eyes again, listening for any sound of my kidnappers. It wouldn't do for them to know I was awake right away…

After a second, I discerned that I couldn't hear anything weird, just a hollow roar I thought might be wind, and under that…

…whistling?

_Kidnappers aren't supposed to whistle_, I thought, my metaphorical eyebrow twitching. _And definitely not such a happy tune, either. _

Suddenly my nose itched; when I reached up to scratch it, I realized that my hands weren't tied or anything—no chains, no ropes, no nothin'. _And what the hell is this? What kind of kidnapper doesn't tie the kidnap-ee up?_

The whistling stopped when I moved. "Oh good, you're awake," Keiko's voice said. She didn't sound happy but she didn't sound scared, either, and this confused me so much that I sat up in order to dive into questioning the woman on just what the heck was going on.

Sitting, however, only made my head swim, so I sank to the stony ground with a groan. The ceiling blurred; I shut my eyes as shoes scrambled up next to me and a hand reached back to cup my neck and help me rise to my elbows. The hand shook, fingers cold and small, but firm.

"Don't try to move. You hit your head; remember?" she said, finger prodding my temple. The action hurt; I winced. "The bleeding's stopped, but how do you feel?"

I opened my mouth to speak, and that's when the nausea hit me. For the next few minutes I was only aware of Keiko holding back my hair while I rolled onto my side and wretched, spilling Yukina's handmade dinner onto the floor with every violent heave, and when I finally managed to cough up everything and the sickness passed I collapsed back onto my back and breathed carefully through my nose.

"You _really_ hit your head," Keiko fretted. "Dani, I'm so sorry, if you hadn't tried to come after me—"

I managed to crack my eyes open despite the pain splitting my skull in half. Keiko's face swam in and out of focus as it loomed over me, her worried eyes and tight lips hardly visible in the dark, and behind her I could barely discern the curve of a rough stone ceiling. Were we in a cave? It was hard to tell when my eyes refused to focus for more than a few seconds at a time.

"Not your fault," I told her through clenched teeth, but the nausea came back and I had to wretch again. When it was through I went back to lying on my back, and after a few silent minutes (it hurt my head to hear her speak; she figured it out when I winced) I allowed Keiko to help me sit up.

We _were_ in a cave, I figured out once I took a more thorough look around. It was a small one, I supposed: circular, only twenty or so feet deep and thirty or so feet across. Keiko and I sat at the back; opposite us was a fifteen-foot arch of stone that encased and expanse of deep blue night spackled across with stars, a patch from a giant quilt that I couldn't totally see. The stars I could see provided the small light I could view the cavern by, which wasn't much at all come to think of it…

I kept my eyes fastened on the entrance to the cave, focusing on the blurry stars in lieu of the cave's disconcerting shadow, shadow that seemed to squirm and wriggle against my vision and threaten to overthrow my sight. I hated it, clinging to the sight of the stars—even though they swam—as a buffer against the gloom.

Light… it's something all humans love. Dark makes our race uneasy whether we want it to or not, and even though I might have a demon's body, a part of me still hates being confined to the dark.

"Where are we?" I managed to ask after a few minutes of deep breathing. My voice came out harsh, the way a tortured toad would sound. Keiko grimaced at my side, helping me upright to lean against the cave's curved wall before she settled in next to me with arms wrapped around her knees.

"I'm not sure," she admitted. I had to grit my teeth when she spoke, temples aflame. "We flew for miles before coming here."

I opened my mouth to ask more questions, decided against it, and decided that I'd had enough of the dark prickling against my skin: I wanted to create a light. With a deep breath I tried to focus myself to go into theta. Slipping wasn't easy, the pain in my head making the darkness of my soul throb too much to fall inside properly…

Keiko broke my concentration right as I began to slip between pulses of pain and into theta. "Dani? Are you OK?" she asked, touching my leg where it lay stretched out in front of me.

"I'm fine," I ground out, eyes squeezed shut.

Her fingers pressed into my thigh. "It's just, with head wounds, you're not supposed to let the person sleep—" she began, but she stopped a gust of wind blew in through the cave's mouth and robbed her of speech. The sudden chill gripped my body and forced it to shiver, the motion making me break out in uncontrollable spasms that rattled my brain around in my head like a day-old cinnamon roll, and Keiko shivered too but was able to recover much more quickly than I.

"Just listen to that wind," she murmured when it died down, huddling deeper into her sweater like a turtle in a shell. Unlike me, Keiko was wearing day clothes—even shoes!—instead of skimpy pajamas and bare feet. The hairs on my legs and arms were standing up like needles as another light breeze drifted toward us and caressed my bare neck.

Sweet shuddered inside me, wanting to provide warmth but unable to do so. It was like the waves of pain radiating from my temple were suppressing her, making her voice sound as if it were coming from many miles away.

"I n-need to make a fire," I said, teeth chattering. "It's s-so cold…"

Keiko's face lit up at the idea, then fell. "We don't have any wood," she said.

I wrapped my arms around myself and let my eyes fall shut. "Don't need it," I said, and as I breathed out and tried to let theta grip me, pull me into my own energy so I could sing the firesong and—

Keiko yelped, suddenly, and then let out a little shriek as another gust of wind rocketed into the cave with considerably more force than the other blasts—this was a veritable tornado of cold air. My hair flew around my head in a brown storm and the stone around us seemed to hum as something big touched down nearby with a thump to shake bones; my eyes, when they opened, swam with tears since the air cut into them in sharp waves, and even though I could hardly see straight I realized that the stars were gone, their light obscured by something gargantuan and _moving_ and—

It wasn't rational, me lurching to my foot using the wall for stability, and it wasn't rational, me moving in front of Keiko with a growl and a stumble that nearly made me sick. My head swam and my vision tunneled, periphery swirling into muddy colors and dancing black dots.

"Dani!" Keiko cried, rising to her knees so she could throw her arms around my waist from behind. "Dani, sit down!"

"Stay back!" I called as loudly as I could (I'm not sure if I was talking to the creature that was busy crawling into the cave, scraping toward us over the stone with rasps of claw on rock, or if I was talking to Keiko, trembling on the floor behind me), but Keiko's arms went tight.

"Dani, it's OK!" she begged. "Just sit, _really_, we're—"

"I'm not a fighter but I'm better than nothing!" I bellowed, but my knees gave out and I crashed down onto them painfully. Desperate to protect her—"Yusuke will kill me if you get hurt!" I think I yelled—I threw myself at theta, forcing it over myself so I could all but scream the firesong into being, and when my eyes opened I realized that I had held out a hand and that I was cupping a small ball of fire in my palm.

It was by its feeble light that I saw our captor for the first time.

The thing had the general shape of a giant bird—I'd reckon that the wingspan stretched as long as a bus and that the body was nearly as long as that, though the bottom half of it hadn't made it into the cave quite yet. Like a bat, the wings were multi-segmented with three claws near the final joint, and it was using these claws to drag itself head-first toward us into the cave. Unlike a bat, the wings were feathered and downy, beautiful to the eye as each plume and frond sparkled with aquamarine and sapphire wherever the light of my fire caught the pigment and made it shine. A gracefully arched neck had been extended toward us, a wickedly curved yet delicate beak the color of amber clicking a bit as it came closer, and when it tossed its head black feathers fell mane-like over the bird's spine. To my utter shock the creature's golden eyes were staring at Keiko and me with very real emotion—curiosity, wariness, and…

…and was that _apology_ in there, or was my concussion making me see things even _weirder_ than the real-life, bat-winged, and much-too-big version of Puu crawling toward me across the cave floor?

"Dani, it's OK, really!" Keiko said, gripping my shoulders to support my collapsing spine, because I very nearly fell over as I stared at Puu, _oh my god why the hell was the embodiment of Yusuke's soul _kidnapping_ me?_ "This little guy, he's a friend!"

"Little?" I managed to repeat, hand shaking as I held the fire out toward the gigantic bird. "_Little_?"

"His name is Puu," Keiko told me as she brushed my hair behind my ears, cradling me against her chest in comfort. "He's Yusuke's… well, it's a long story, but he's basically Yusuke's overgrown canary and—"

Puu, miffed at being likened to a common caged bird, jerked his head back and burbled at Keiko in a voice much higher pitched than I had been expecting. Those bright eyes of his radiated pain and hurt.

"Oh, all right, his _phoenix_, then," Keiko relented with a sigh. "Not that you'd know it from the way you ask…"

"Phoenix?" I asked blankly.

"Yeah," said Keiko. She shot Puu a dirty look that barely masked the affection lurking beneath. "I took care of him when he was, um, younger, so I understand him pretty well, and I think… well, I think he took us here because he wanted to see Yusuke."

"What?"

She stood up, carefully helping me lean against the cave wall, and she walked to the phoenix, so she could caress his cheek with a smile. The bird leaned into her touch and warbled out something like an avian purr.

"Puu is really closely tied to Yusuke," Keiko explained. "He can feel what Yusuke feels, kind of like a witch's familiar." She smiled at me over her shoulder, brown eyes alight. "I did a lot of research when Puu showed up and the 'familiar' comparison is pretty close, only Puu is more like Yusuke's soul in the form of an animal than a separate creature. He's really attuned with Yusuke's emotions."

My mind drifted, of course, to Sweet, only she and Puu weren't quite the same. She was a separate creature with her own thoughts and feelings, but Puu... maybe he was more like Yusuke's subconscious, or something?

_Puu's certainly more affectionate on Keiko than Yusuke is in real life,_ I thought as I watched Keiko pet the big blue bird. It had closed its eyes to enjoy her touch._ Maybe he's what keeps her with Yusuke. So long as she knows Puu loves her she knows that Yusuke feels the same way, even if he's too much of a blockhead to express it properly._

"What did you mean, he took us because he wanted Yusuke?" I said. My tongue felt like it was made of gravel; I swallowed.

Keiko sighed, clearly unhappy. "Yusuke's always been a bit embarrassed by Puu. Says he's too fluffy to be his soul, and stuff. You know what _boys_ are like."

We rolled our eyes as one.

"Anyway," she said, "Puu used to be smaller and he lived with Yusuke, but now he's gotten too big to stay at the temple and we had to move him out here so no one would see him. Yusuke doesn't visit him as much as he should, and Puu probably sensed all the tension at the temple and got worried, so…"

Puu made a distressed noise and pressed his face to Keiko's torso. She wrapped her arms around his jaws and snuggled into the top of his head.

"I think he came after me to lure Yusuke into visiting him," she said, stroking Puu's black mane. "If he steals me, Yusuke _has_ to come visit."

I started to reply, and then something happened. One second I was awake—woozy, but awake—and the next I was lying on my back with Keiko lightly slapping my cheeks, calling my name and telling me to wake up.

"Whuzzappenin'?" I groggily grumbled.

"You just fell over," Keiko said, and to my horror she looked like she was about to cry. "Your head, you hurt it so—"

"Ugh." I winced when Keiko lifted my head and pillowed it on her lap, and I blinked up at the ceiling for a second to try to focus my eyes. They wouldn't cooperate, however, so when Puu's head snaked close to stare down at me, all I could see were golden disks and dark blue plumage.

"Where's m'fire?" I mumbled.

"It's still in your hand," Keiko informed me. Cold fingers curled my hair behind my ears.

I checked, saw it, and sighed. That was a relief, but… "Warm?"

"Puu's blocking the wind."

I very carefully rose to my elbows. Indeed, Puu had pulled his body inside the cave and was barring the entry way with his bulk. When our eyes met he warbled and glimmered, happy at having our attention. I settled back down onto Keiko's lap with a shuddered breath.

Keiko drew in a deep breath. "You tried to save me, you know."

I shook my head and regretted it immediately, clenching my eyes and teeth against the sloshing pain.

Keiko waited for me to recover before speaking. "You hit your head coming after me, and when Puu came in you jumped up and said… you said that Yusuke would be mad if you let me get hurt."

"Just doing my job," I gritted out.

Her words came soft. "But I yelled at you."

I didn't say anything for a little while. Keiko pinched my neck. I yelped.

"You aren't supposed to sleep with a concussion," she said. "Try talking to me."

I did as she asked. "You yelled because… you're worried about Yusuke, right?" I asked. I didn't look at Keiko as I spoke. "I'm an unknown. You can't predict me. That means I'm a threat. Right?"

"No one is willing to talk to me about you," Keiko said by way of agreement. "They told me about the Book and Ryu and Seishou because they wanted me to be on my guard, but you… it's like you're some taboo subject, you and Ren both."

I don't know if it was the blow to the head or Keiko's heartbrokenly pleading voice that made me start waxing poetic on Seishou, Ryu, the Bright Ones, and the Book, but (for the second time that night) no matter the cause the results were the same. I began telling her of waking up in the woods and learning about the Book, the boys, the Sisters, everything, and though it probably was a bad idea to tell her so much about myself, the words helped me keep awake. My voice grew stronger with each sentence, though my mind stayed fuzz around the edges and Keiko had to pinch me more than once when I trailed off and showed no signs of recovery. When it was through and I had told her all I knew and how it made me feel (within reason, of course), I opened my eyes to find her staring at me. Brown eyes seemed pensive.

"It must have been hard for you," she said. Her scowl wasn't for me, but rather for the stuff I'd gone through. "A new time, no one who spoke your language…"

"It's better with Ren here," I said, eyes falling shut.

"I bet. Having friends by you is better than anything." She paused for a few seconds, thinking, then said: "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I guess I just hadn't seen it from your perspective yet."

"It's OK," I said.

"And this might be really petty of me, but…" she trailed off.

"But what?"

"It's just… well, Yusuke promised he'd take me to the winter festival in Sakana this year," she said, and even by the light of my small fire I could tell she was blushing. "When this whole thing started he promised that he'd have taken care of it all by then, so we could actually spend some time together, but he told me tonight that he won't be able to make it and... I guess I blamed you for that." Her fingers swept more insistently across my hair. "He ran out on the first date we'd had in a long time to chase after Seishou—and he's not even technically working for Spirit World anymore!" She sighed. "The trip to Sakana was supposed to make up for the ruined date. Fat chance of that now."

"I'm sorry, Keiko," I said, because I was. The anime and the manga both had shown just how often she got stood up, and wow, the girl had the baddest luck I knew.

"No, I'm sorry," she said. "I blamed you for it when we first met even though it wasn't your fault."

I snorted, not caring that it was anything but ladylike. "It's fine—you're disappointed that he can't make good on his promise," I said. "You got hopeful, and now…"

"Sometimes hope seems foolish when dealing with Yusuke." Keiko sighed. "The festival is next Sunday, just a week away. From the way he talked earlier tonight, he doesn't see the end of this mess for a lot longer than that."

My heart fluttered a little faster. "They haven't found Ryu or Seishou, then."

"No sign of either of them," Keiko said dully. "Yusuke thinks Seishou might be dead after Hiei's attack, but Ryu—he's just _gone_."

I swallowed, nerves rising. "Ren is safe, at least," I quipped, trying to make light of the situation.

"Hey, you are, too!" Keiko said. "Yusuke won't let you get hurt, and Hiei—"

I cracked my eyes open. She was looking at me with a smile threatening the corners of her mouth, and when she saw me staring she tried very hard to banish it. She failed utterly.

"Hiei won't let me get hurt, either," I said, eyes closing again. I tried not to acknowledge the blush on my cheeks. "Is that what you wanted to say?"

"Yes, actually." Her laugh seemed to sparkle behind my eyes, light and high and pretty. "He's always been pretty scary. I'd be afraid of hurting you with him around."

I said the one word I could manage to say, _because when had _Keiko_ figured it out_?: "Thanks."

She laughed again. "Don't mention it."

A nudge at my ankle made me open my eyes. Puu was touching my bare foot with his smooth beak, making a small noise in the back of his throat as he pushed my knees into a bent position. At his further beckoning Keiko helped me sit up and, eventually, stand. She kept one arm around my waist and looped my arm across her shoulders for further support, and when Puu saw that we were upright and stable he gently moved away from the cave mouth, twisting his long body and even longer tail around without hitting us. Wind hissed into the cave and nearly made me pass out from the force of it (I almost missed seeing that the stars outside had faded into dusky pink dawn), but Keiko let out a small cry and I somehow managed to open my blurry eyes in time to see a figure leap into the entrance, stumble inside, and collide with Puu's chest.

"Holy crap, block that wind you big idiot!" Yusuke screeched, and Puu encircled the boy with his neck before shivering back into prime wind-blocking territory. Yusuke struggled to free himself from Puu's grip for a second, cursing, and when he at last broke free he caught sight of Keiko and me. Every last one of his teeth showed when he grinned.

I hardly saw that, though. I kept waiting for another figure to appear, a smaller one with brighter eyes that trailed fire in their wake... but no such figure showed itself.

Why?

"About time you got here!" Keiko said waspishly, but Yusuke's grin didn't fade a lick as he jogged over. "Dani's hurt!"

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh come on, Puu wouldn't hurt a fly," he said with a chuckle.

Keiko's response was to grab my hand (the one looped around her neck) and hold the fire in my palm closer to my face.

Yusuke's eyes went wide. "Oh. That's blood." He wheeled on Puu and stalked over to the creature, who sulked piteously against the wall. "Since when have you gotten violent? That's _my_ job!"

"It wasn't his fault," I mumbled. Yusuke looked over, confused, so I said: "I grabbed him, and fell."

Yusuke began to cackle. "I knew you were clumsy, Dani, but you mean you gave your_self_ a concussion?" The cackles only got louder, forcing Yusuke to bend at the waist to support his torso on his knees. "That's rich! Even Kuwabara's not dumb enough to do that!"

"Oh be quiet, Yusuke," Keiko retorted, the words stopping Yusuke cold. "She did it trying to save me. She didn't know Puu was a friend and thought I was being abducted, so you should be _thanking_ Dani, not making fun of her!" She tossed her hair. "Are you alone? Kurama or Yukina could heal her."

Yusuke shook his head. "It's just me. We couldn't leave the temple undefended so I was all they could spare. Plus, I'm the only one who can track Puu."

The bird sang and nuzzled Yusuke at that, happy for recognition at last.

"Did you take care of the girls, buddy?" Yusuke said to Puu, and a tick in his face and voice made me think he was wary of something. My suspicions were confirmed when he took a sidelong glance at me and Keiko and said: "Why do I get the feeling that you two having an alliance might be even scarier than Ryu and Seishou working together?"

"It's because we're girls, dumbass," I gasped, because a sharp pain had suddenly tried to split my skull in half. I put my hand over my face on reflex, teeth grinding into my lower lip as I attempted to block out the pain. It didn't work, and when the spear faded I gasped, only to have another lance of pain turn my thoughts to mush.

"We need to find Yukina," Keiko was fretting when I could hear again. "Dani's been left untreated for too long."

"Let me take her," I heard Yusuke say, and the next thing I knew I was being pulled into a pair of strong arms, carried across the room, and then I sank into something warm, soft, and feathery—Puu's back, if I didn't know any better.

"Can you put out that fire?" Yusuke asked as he grabbed the offending wrist.

I nodded, head lolling as I reached inside myself and doused the flame (letting go was far easier than summoning just then, but don't ask me why). When it was gone Yusuke grabbed my arms and forced them around Puu's wide neck; I cuddled into the warmth with a sigh, one that turned into a yelp when I felt a familiar pinch on my arm.

"No sleeping for the concussed!" Keiko said for the millionth time—really, she was quite the well-meaning nag sometimes.

"Yeah, you're gonna want to hear what's been happening while you were away," Yusuke teased. When I cracked open an eye to find him standing next to Puu, he grinned and shot me an OK sign. "Ren's got some things to show you when we get back."

"Ren?" I mumbled into Puu's feathers. They felt soft despite being as wide as my arm.

"Yeah, Ren," Yusuke said. "Woke us all up in the middle of the night hollering in that stupid language of yours, but I'll let her fill you in when we get home."

"'Kay," I murmured.

Keiko reached up and pinched me again, jerking me back into wakefulness. Yusuke offered her a high-five which she returned with a smug smile, and then Yusuke moved toward Keiko and picked her up, presumably to put her onto Puu behind me. Only, he didn't do that right away—he spun her around once and held her against him, smiling as he breathed into her hair. Keiko blushed all the while.

I closed my eyes. The moment seemed private, somehow… and my eyes knew this, but too bad for my traitorous ears!

"I'm glad you're safe," I couldn't help but hear Yusuke say. "When I saw the kitchen I nearly died. Again."

"Do it and I'll kill you," Keiko replied. "Twice was enough."

I heard the sound of a cheek being kissed before a warm body swung up onto Puu behind me. I recognized the slender fingers as Keiko's when she wound then around my waist.

"Alley-oop!" Yusuke called, and a thump later he was behind Keiko. Puu took a few steps, turning so fast I would surely have thrown up had my eyes not been shut tight, and then the wind hit us and the cold made me wake up, fast. A few bouncing, bone-thrumming steps later we dropped sharply, sending my stomach plummeting somewhere around me ankles; I almost screamed before gravity reversed and we were soaring upward instead of down, and I didn't dare look around us because the wind was too strong for vision and it probably would have been blurry, anyway.

Yusuke had no such reservations, hooping and hollering while Keiko giggled at the joy of flight. I just clung to Puu's neck, waiting for the ride to be over and hoping I wouldn't fall asleep and slide off of his back and into the oblivion waiting for me below.

We flew for a few minutes, dipping steadily up and down with every pump of Puu's massive wings, and then Yusuke screamed over the sound of rushing wind: "Enjoying the ride, Dani?"

Had I not felt like I was going to be sick, I would have told him: _Those squirrels in Demon World were enough for me, thanks,_ but since I _did_ feel like I was going to be sick I kept the thought inside, along with this one: _This incident is just overkill. What kind of author is writing my story, anyway? They must really hate my guts if they're putting me through this shit again._

It took an untold length of time for us to get close to the temple. Keiko and Yusuke slacked off on their keep-Dani-awake duty and I caught myself dozing more than once, but Keiko grabbed my arm and shook me, hissing above the wind around us: "Dani, look—the temple!"

I fought to open my eyes, forgetting where I was for just a second, and then I saw the trees rushing by below us and the lights swiftly coming closer up ahead. My head reeled and throbbed and I buried my face in Puu's neck, breathing in the dusty scent of his feathers as we grew closer and closer to our destination.

I felt his wings rock just before we dipped down low, a cushion of air under them breaking our fall to the courtyard. Despite this, touching down still meant a horrendous thud and skid, and when we came grinding to a halt I would have toppled off Puu's back had Keiko not had a vice grip on my hips. Voices trembled on the now-still air, ringing tinny in my ears since the vicious wind had died.

"Is she bleeding?" I heard Kuwabara yelp as feet pounded toward us. "OhmygodsheIS! What happened, Yusuke?"

"She just bumped her head a little bit, that's all," the detective said. "You know Dani—clumsy like an ox." His feet hit the ground and someone tugged at my arms, pulling me off Puu and for one horrible moment I thought I was falling, but then somehow I was on the ground and sitting up while someone poked my head wound. The pain made my eyelids flutter: before me crouched Genkai, and behind her stood the wavering forms of Hiei, Kuwabara, and Kurama. Yusuke had me by the shoulders to help me sit straight, but when Keiko got off Puu she took over that job.

"Kuwabara, go get Yukina," Genkai snapped. He scurried off at a run, leaving Kurama to pull Yusuke aside to ask a few low-pitched questions as Hiei stared down at me and scowled. His expression said everything his mouth didn't—that he had been worried, that he was still sort of worried, but that the worry was fast replacing itself with why-do-you-always-get-yourself-into-these-messes,-Dani?

I started to smile at him when unsteady movement caught my eye.

"Dani?"

I looked past Hiei at the sound of Ren's voice. She came sprinting out of the temple at top speed, barefoot and dressed in athletic shorts and a button-down shirt, and when she saw the blood on my head her face went pale. Those cornflower eyes of hers zeroed in on my face, locking tight and not letting go. The rest of the world, I knew, had ceased to exist in the wake of her intense focus.

"I'm fine," I managed to rasp, hoping to snap her out of it, but she just shook herself, breezed past the others, and knelt next to Genkai in front of me. Her right hand came up and cupped my face, the left one playing over my wound as gently as she could manage.

"Dani, I think I can fix this," she said, and the notion made my brow quirk.

To Genkai, however, whatever Ren was about to do was obviously not a good thing. "Oh, not this again!" she snapped. To Ren she snarled: "Haven't you caused enough trouble for us already?"

"Trouble?" I asked, alarmed, but then I stopped.

Ren's hand, you see, had started to glow.

What happened then was a curious thing. One minute my head throbbed and my vision swam, and then there came a sharp sucking noise alongside a green glow so pale it was almost white, and my skin started to itch and crawl and buckle in on itself like paper getting sucked into a vacuum. The dried blood on my skin went wet and started to drip _backward_, inching back up and into the wound as if the wound were being struck in reverse.

"What the heck are you doing?" I asked when Ren's hand dropped. My head had cleared, my vision had focused, I was no longer tired—what Ren had done had _fixed_ me, yes, but somehow I didn't think she had healed me, not _really_, not in the way Yukina had.

Although she was panting from exertion, my best friend managed to smile at me.

"I turned back the time on your scab!" she chirped brightly, shaking her head like it was obvious. "What's it look like to _you_?"

* * *

Ren skipped off before I could play 20-Questions with her, and as I tried to stumble after Yukina came onto the porch with Kuwabara. Genkai dismissed them (as well as Keiko, Kurama, and Yusuke) and turned to me. With unerring calm she spoke the words that would turn my life quite literally upside-down.

"So you're telling me," I said when she was through, "that Ren can reverse time, reverse gravity, _and_ phase through solid objects?"

Genkai cast a sidelong glance at Ren, who had finally noticed Puu and was clinically inspecting the joints in his wings. She mumbled something about avian biology while she worked; Puu had adopted a longsuffering expression and was staring at the temple doors as if the force of his gaze could bring Yusuke and Keiko back from inside.

"So we've surmised," Genkai said, looking back my way. "We were inspecting the kitchen after you were taken and she walked through the door—and I mean _through_ it, literally. It was shut."

"OK, so there's the phasing," I said. _Ren's going to be even harder to handle now. "_What about the rest?"

"She took one look at what happened in the kitchen and everything in the room started to float. She started babbling in English, mostly your name…" A long pause before she said: "Maybe her worry for you triggered her abilities."

"Could be," I said.

Genkai seemed to snap out of herself for a second. Then she said: "Eventually she calmed down and everything went back to normal, but she broke most of my teacups."

_This is so not good,_ I thought, and winced. "OK, gravity control. Time travel?"

"You saw what she did with your head," Genkai snapped. "But even before that, she walked up to the busted-out wall and made it glow green. A few minutes later it was whole again. We saw images of you, Puu, and Keiko in the glow. It's how we knew what had happened and where to look."

"So she can't change the time on things that aren't right there with her, I guess," I said slowly.

"Probably. Or else you, Keiko, and Puu would have been pulled right back where you started." She shot Ren another look, one that was full of contemplation. "Which might have been handy, to tell the truth, but whatever. She'll get stronger with training."

This floored me. "Training?" I stammered. "You're going to train Ren—?"

Genkai shrugged and stood up. "Perhaps. She's as embroiled in this as we are, and an ally that can bend the laws of physics might be handy to have around." She turned away, hands clasped behind her back as she moved toward the temple. Over her shoulder she called: "I'm guessing, given her reaction to _your_ powers yesterday, that she wasn't aware of her own abilities until sometime last night, and since you weren't here it's not like you had anything to do with it." A smirk. "If you're working together, you're doing a terrible job of communicating, even if you are the only two people who speak that whiny language of yours in this entire world."

"This is all… quite a shock," I said, which was probably the understatement of the century, but I digress.

"You're telling me?" she asked. "She started to go on a rampage and smashed most of my plates. Kurama had to sedate her to get her to stop destroying my kitchen, and even then she kept asking after you and trying to run off into the woods."

I couldn't help but smile. "That sounds like typical Ren behavior to me."

Genkai rolled her eyes. "Do me a favor now that I've let you off the hook, would you?"

"Anything," I said, feeling an absurd surge of gratitude for not being under suspect anymore. Who knew that letting Ren be alone and mischievous would benefit us both?

"I want you to ask her how she found out about her abilities, and write your findings down in the notebook I gave you. I expect a full report by lunch time." Another smirk, and she mounted the porch steps. "Get on it. Now."

For a second I stared at the door she disappeared through, confused about her reference to a midday meal, but then I looked at the orange-and-pink-streaked sky and remembered that I had been out all night. Puu's little jaunt had taken longer than expected.

"So I guess that means I won't be getting any sleep, then," I sighed, slumping until my forehead touched my bent knees. Tiredness crept up without warning, making me struggle to suppress a yawn. "Great."

"You'd have gotten sleep if you hadn't decided to play the hero."

I looked up, startled to find Hiei standing just where I'd left him. I'd forgotten he was there, so caught up in Genkai's revelation that I'd just…

"I thought Keiko was getting kidnapped," was my defense. "She'd have done the same for me."

Hiei let out a harsh sound somewhere between a laugh and a curse.

"Well ex-_cuse_ me for caring for others, Mister Cynical," I grumbled. I looked toward Ren, still frolicking with Puu in the courtyard. "Hey, Ren?"

She sprinted over like an eager puppy, long blonde hair swirling around her elbows in silky tangles.

"Genkai was telling me about your new… um, talents," I said. "Would you mind showing me, too?"

Her eyes opened so wide I thought they might fall out. "Of course!" she said, and her hands clenched into fists. Before I could so much as blink I had been enveloped in a sphere of opalescent green light, and with a gasp I felt the world… tilt. I'm not sure how to describe it: one second I was anchored on the ground and in my clothes, and the next my shirt was loose and billowing around me and my hair was hovering a few inches away from my body. The ground fell away when I pushed against it, and before I could discern what was happening I had twisted in a panic and wound up floating in the fetal position above the cobblestones. Hiei looked between Ren and I with wide eyes, unable to figure out if I needed help or if Ren needed a good bashing over the head.

"It's really easy, actually," Ren quipped when I squealed at her to _put me down_, _now_. "I saw what you could do and figured hey, if she can bend sound, what's to say I can't bend reality lines? I just move inside the direction of red and jerk everythin' toward the blue side of things, and—"

"Blue isn't a direction!" I screeched in protest, twisting so hard that I accidentally made myself turn a back-flip in the green anti-gravity sphere.

"It is to me!" Ren insisted.

"Well, why don't you _point_ in it if it really is one!"

Ren's hand promptly disappeared from atop her wrist, blanking out of existence as she did something I couldn't wrap my head around. "The blue direction is the opposite of the red direction," she said primly, and her hand returned to the viewable world. "You see, I move sideways into the—"

I didn't really give a damn about the physics of it, actually, and I told her so on no uncertain terms. With a sigh she dropped her fists, the green glow going out with a hiss of… well, not sound, but something close to it. I belly flopped to the ground with a gasp and groaned; the landing had been rough.

"You never let me talk math," Ren whined.

I got to my hands and knees, winded. "So you just… figured it all out?" I asked, panting a little. "Just… on your own?"

"Yeah!" Ren said, and to my horror she began to giggle. "Goin' through stuff is the easiest. I just tweak my atomic structure and mass to mesh through the makeup of the thing I wanna go through—like fittin' nails through holes. It's easy when I know what elements I'm workin' with, but even if I don't know I can pretty much wing it by _feelin'_ it, you know?"

"I think I do," I said slowly, remembering the distinctiveness of some of my own powers.

"Oh, and the time stuff is just _so cool_!" she sighed. "I twist everything's color in the fifth-color-space, and—"

"Fifth space?"

"The fifth dimension," Ren clarified, and took in a deep breath through her nose before sighing loudly and happily. "I don't know what it is about this place, Dani, but everything here is more _real_, like the dimensions and the physics have all solidified into somethin' _more than theory_, you know? Like theories are actual _events_ here! It's like I can reach out and touch all the principles I've been toyin' with in my head, bringin' 'em out into the open in a way I never could before!"

"It's the same with my music," I told her. "Only it took me a lot longer than you to even begin to master it, and I still have a long way to go." _Wow, what a time for jealousy to flare up._

Ren preened. "Not all of us can be as smart as me," she bragged.

My eyebrow twitched, the words slipping out on their own. "You're such a Mary Sue," I informed her, and put a hand over my mouth on reflex. That insult wasn't something to be used lightly, after all.

Luckily for me, Ren didn't seem to get the reference. "Come again?"

My hand dropped from my lips. "Oh," I said, and grimaced. "It's nothing."

Why did I feel, suddenly, like I was no longer my story's main character?

* * *

NOTES:

_All I can say is that it's finals week and I AM SWAMPED OUT MY MOTHER HUGGING MIND. So, a short chapter: Ren has weird powers that will get more explanation soon, Keiko kinda came around, and NO, we have NOT seen the last of Dani trying to explain the world to Ren. Ren hasn't even been told about Seishou and Ryu yet! _

_Ahem. Too much to say and not enough time to say it. What is it with Dani and being forced into states of unconsciousness, anyway? Aye, me. Hope you liked it. I had a terrible time writing considering how many essays I have due at the end of this week… CRAP, GOTTA GO WORK._

_(*scurries*)_

_MANY THANKS TO MY READERS! Your words gave me strength this week. Finals are killer. Takara Rose Oizumi, Ry171819, Masuyo Shun, Koryu Elric, ephermeral violet, spiritfoxxx821, anon, Zetsubel, colbub, Tsu Aurora, double-a-battery, etowa-ru, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, AmoreVampiresv-v, Kai-Chan94, Cheshire Blue Kitten, darkravensnight, destinyswindow, Kaiya's Watergarden, Yoko Kiara 14, chocolateluvr13, DoilyRox, j.d.y., AkaMizu-chan, , Reclun, Tally Youngblood, Angel of Randomosity, nanisan, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, lostmoonchild, itsallaboutbob, Kuromi-san114, Foxgirl Ray, Katt Jeane, FireGoddessofDoom, Supreme Baka, ShadowFireFox13!_


	60. Chapter 60: Freak on a Leash

Future Talk

Chapter 60:

"Freak on a Leash"

* * *

Altogether, I think people need to just, you know, chill or something, because Ren started running around like an idiot and wouldn't sit down long enough for me to get a decent word out of her pretty much as soon as Genkai left. Matters only got worse when Yusuke came out of the house and started trying to wave Puu off, calling him an overgrown chicken and other junk, but Ren wanted Puu—whom she dubbed "Big Bird"—to stay and play with her, so she pushed Yusuke over and he chased her around until Keiko intervened because Puu had started crying this big fat tears the size of ostrich eggs all over Ren's outfit. She wasn't wearing a bra and the shirt she'd borrowed from Kuwabara was white, so everyone got a good look at her chest (not like she cared, the exhibitionist) and Keiko started screaming at Yusuke to cover his eyes, Ren's a _girl_, so I taught Ren how to say please and thank you before Keiko ushered her back inside the house to get something decent to put on.

That, of course, left me and Hiei and Yusuke and Puu all alone, and then Puu grabbed Yusuke around the waist and flew off with him with Yusuke screaming all the while, and that left just me and _Hiei_ all alone, and that was something I hadn't counted on and pretty soon we were just standing awkwardly in the courtyard with nothing to say.

Yeah.

People need to chill.

I was sitting on the ground right where Ren left me when Hiei cleared his throat, looked at me down his pert nose, and said: "You dropped your staff."

I had noticed this a few moments before when I tried to stand and remembered I had no crutch, and told him so. I followed it up with: "How'd you know?"

"You're not carrying it now."

"Oh. Duh," I muttered, embarrassed. I looked at Hiei sheepishly to ask: "Do you know where it is?"

He nodded, red eyes narrowing. "It's where you dropped it."

"You mean no one picked it up?" I asked. This surprised me—I figured someone would find it and put it somewhere for safekeeping.

Hiei inclined his head and scowled. "We tried."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked, because I honestly didn't know.

He turned on his heel and started walking away, but it wasn't his leave-me-the-hell-alone walk because it didn't have the stalking quality typical of _that_ one—this was more like the glide of his follow-me-you-imbecile walk. When I _didn't_ follow (because, um, my staff was gone) Hiei stopped, looked at me over his shoulder, and deadpanned the question: "Do you need me to carry you again?"

"I can get there on my own, thanks," I replied, because I was through being carried thank you _very_ much—between all these freaking kidnappings and constant carryings, I was beginning to wonder just how much of a damsel in distress I was becoming, and I didn't like my suspicions one bit. With a burst of willpower I grew out my left arm until it touched the ground, palm and fingers splaying out to support my weight. Hiei's eyes got a fraction of a degree larger when he saw what I was doing; he followed me with his eyes while I walked (armed?) to his side, shot him a sunny grin, and asked: "Where'd you say it was?"

He smirked and turned on his heel again, and I followed him around the corner of the temple to another section of courtyard. I could tell from the one window in the temple's otherwise windowless walls that the kitchen was only a pane of glass away from us, but I wasn't too interested in that because I had spotted my staff lying on the stone-covered ground, and it was…

"Did you get mad at it or something?" I asked Hiei. He stopped a few feet away from the staff, but I went right up to it and knelt to poke at the fire-blackened marks that had turned grey stone to soot. Weirdly, the staff appeared to be unmarked despite the fact that it looked like someone had built a bonfire on top of it. Ash lay at least an inch thick all around the glassy red bone.

"It burned when we tried to touch it," he said.

"Will it burn me?"

"Not likely."

I took a deep breath before reaching out to take the object; it felt like it leapt into my hand on its own, flooding my muscles with warmth and hominess I hadn't realized I'd been missing until then. Sweet, too—she felt it and stretched within me, content to have a part of herself back at last, and because I had no need for it anymore I began to shrink my arm to its proper shape.

"What is Ren?"

Hiei's voice startled me. I spun, eyes bugging, to find him staring at me with hands in his pockets and a scowl on his face.

"What is Ren?" Hiei repeated. "Is she like you?"

"Uh… do you mean human?" I guessed.

"You're not human."

"We've been over this, Hiei."

His eyes went hard. "Human minded with a demon's instincts. Ren smells of a demon, too."

My muscles tensed, freezing me in place.

"Only her soul is that of a human's," Hiei went on, eyeing me. "Like you. Though you both claim to be humans. Were _all_ Americans demons ignorant of their own origin?"

I passed a hand through my hair slowly, chewing on his words. I wasn't sure how to answer him—if what he said was true and Ren was _really_ a demon, and since my shapeshifting body (I carefully tried not to think _my mother's body_) was also a demon, didn't it stand to reason that everyone in the pods was a demon? I mean, Ren had claimed to never have heard of demons and she'd been totally unaware of her own rather excessive abilities, but…

It was shaping up to be that my home world and its parallel copy here in the world of Yu Yu Hakusho had some major differences I had not been prepared to delve into.

"Well," I said, trying to keep my tone even, "Ren had no idea that she could do those things she did earlier, and she was really surprised when I took my bird form earlier, so… I guess she's like me?" I heaved out a heavy sigh. "I really need to sit down and talk with her about stuff. She still doesn't know about Seishou and Ryu and everything."

Hiei said: "_Don't_ tell her everything."

"Um… why?"

Hiei's eyebrow rose. "It's not obvious?"

"Uh… no?"

His scowl went deeper than I'd ever seen it, making my feel like a small child in the principal's office. _What is so obvious that it can make Hiei look like that?_ I wondered. _How big of an idiot am I?_

"Her powers came on much too quickly," he said, and in two steps he had closed the distance between us, grabbed my wrist, and pulled my hand into the air. His other hand spread out my fingers and traced the lines of my palm, his calluses rough and demanding on my skin.

"Your abilities took weeks to emerge," he murmured, "and even then you needed teachers and practice to do anything _useful_."

I managed to say "So?" because Hiei was a little distracting when he was so close up. I almost missed it when he started talking again; I had gotten busy examining his eyelashes.

"So having fully developed powers overnight isn't natural for a novice," Hiei snapped, sharp teeth glinting in the sunlight. His fingers pressed tighter to my skin. "She either knew about them already or had help, and none of _us_ helped her."

I pulled my hand out of his. "Ren's a genius," I said hotly.

"So?"

"So it's entirely possible for her to do stuff like that!" I said. "She picked up a calculus book when she was _ten_ and started doing the advanced problems for _fun_. So—"

"Not even a genius could do what she did without some sort of experience."

"Well, there's a first time for everything."

Hiei's lips curled back over his teeth, and then he was right up in my face and staring at me. I swallowed, unsure of myself, and Hiei's anger faded into mere unhappiness when he saw how fidgety I had become.

"Do not trust her," he said, pulling back so I couldn't feel his breath on my mouth any longer. My mouth dropped open in affront. "No matter how deep your bond, you lack five years of your life. Who knows how much that woman has changed? She could turn on you in a minute."

I stared at him for a second. Then his words sank in.

_She could turn on_—_WHAT_?

"She'd never hurt me or _anyone_ I care for," I sputtered, feeling anger bubble up and burst over me in a sharp storm. "Why would you even suggest—"

"Dani!"

Hiei didn't flinch at the sound of Ren's voice; I did. She bounded barefoot up to us over the cobblestones and skidded to a halt, frowning when her long hair swung into her face and smacked her nose, making her sneeze a sneeze that could make a foghorn jealous. Keiko followed behind at a slower pace, looking frazzled but not unhappy.

"Keiko got me these!" Ren said, spinning in a circle to show her clothes. She wore pants and a t-shirt that were probably as baggy as a circus tent. "Do you like 'em?"

"They're Kuwabara's," Keiko said when she reached us. "We need to get her her own clothes at some point, or we'll start having to do laundry _every_ day."

"Thanks for helping her, Keiko."

She smiled. "No problem."

"Thank the lady, Ren," I said, and my friend dipped a bow and parroted the phrase I'd taught her earlier (only, it came out 'domo tarry-tanto', but Keiko seemed to understand).

"Oh, and I ran into Genkai on the way back out here," Keiko said, touching my arm. "She wasn't happy—she said she wants you writing and filling Ren in right now."

"Oh, sure," I said, mentally giving myself a smack to the head. "Thanks, Keiko!"

She looked around, lips pursing. "Have you seen Yusuke?"

"Puu carried him off."

Brown eyes rolled in exasperation. "Figures."

I turned back to Hiei. He was watching Ren warily, but when he felt my eyes on him he looked my way.

"We'll talk about this later, OK?" I said in a low voice.

After a moment's hesitation, Hiei nodded.

"Alright." Though not happy to hear Hiei bash on my best friend, I wasn't in the mood to pursue the matter right then. There were more important things to worry about.

Keiko overheard the short conversation despite my drop in pitch. "Talk about what?" she asked, interested.

"Oh, um, Genkai mentioned something about training Ren," I covered.

Keiko's lips quirked. "Does she actually need training?" she asked. "Ren looked pretty strong to me."

"Are y'all talkin' about me?" Ren asked, tugging lightly on my hair to get my attention.

"Yeah. I have to take you back inside," I said in English." To the others I added: "Ren's getting antsy, so I'll see you both later."

"I'll tell Genkai you're on track this time," Keiko said.

"Thanks. And Hiei…" I smiled. He didn't return the look. My goodbye died in my throat, so I said: "Nevermind."

I grabbed Ren's arm and began to lead her back toward the temple, looking back once just in time to see Hiei vanish in a flicker of black. Keiko just stood there and watched us go, waving once before we turned the corner and vanished from her sight.

* * *

"Why're people 'round here so tense, anyway?" Ren said when we got back to the room. She flopped onto her futon and cured into a little ball, groaning. "Keiko kept flinchin' every damn time I moved!"

"There's a lot going on that I haven't had time to tell you about, Ren," I said gently as I joined her on my futon. "The people here are all really important in keeping the worlds running smoothly. You and me, we've caused a bit of a stir."

Ren rolled onto her stomach and put her chin on her palms, grinning at me with huge eyes. "Well don't keep me in suspense!" she giggled, tickling the bottom of my bad foot with her pinky. "Get on with it!"

Carefully, I told Ren the basics—about Seishou and Ryu and the evil Book they'd both been after, but how my involvement drove them apart and Seishou had been ousted as being after the machine instead of the Book. When that came up, Ren's face darkened considerably and she began tracing the pattern on the blanket under her.

"If he's after that thing," she said quietly, "then we've got a problem. I mean, I didn't think the machine could've survived this long, but if the pods did…"

"Do you know anything about the machine, Ren?"

She snorted. "Sure I do. My mama designed it."

Ren's mother had been a strange figure in both our lives growing up, and for a second we sat in contemplative silence. Ren hadn't been close to her at all—hell, she'd practically grown up in my house since her mother worked so much—but she'd always been one of those people who made Ren's life… well, less than pleasant.

"Mama called me up durin' our freshmen year at college, when you were studyin' down in Alabama and I was… _studyin'_ in New York."

I could see the lie in her face even as she spoke it, and I wondered at it.

"Yeah," she mumbled. "I was in _school_, in _New York_…"

When she trailed off, looking sheepish and unhappy, I patted her head until she perked up again.

"I'm afraid I lied to ya, darlin'," she said with a sigh. "I wasn't studyin'. I got awarded my degree after writin' my thesis a few weeks after school started."

"That must have been some paper," I said hollowly. I was thinking: _Ren really _did_ go to college in my world. I would have picked up that she was lying to me had she really gotten a degree so fast. But why would she lie in _this_ world? What was different?_

"It was a helluvan essay," Ren agreed, "but the only reason I wrote it was because my mama asked."

"Why?"

"You don't remember since it didn't make headlines til you were a senior, but… it was because of the war."

"The war?"

"Yeah. The war."

The tale Ren spun sounded like something out of a bad Michael Crichton novel, or maybe a James Patterson story gone horribly, horribly wrong: mounting tensions over natural resources, terrorist attacks, environmental concerns… it was all really typical, in my opinion, but what was weird was that the only countries involved were the US, Canada, and everyone down in South America. Asia and Europe and Africa and Australia were populated only sparsely by Northern and Southern American colonies in order to keep the land from spoiling (they left indigenous populations mostly alone), but America wanted to expand and conquer and the other countries didn't like that one bit. They all started stockpiling weapons, threatening to nuke America if they tried anything fishy, which basically meant that the US was being held hostage by their northern and southern neighbors. This, of course, made the US want to start developing weapons to combat the metaphorical gun that everyone was holding to their head, and Ren's mother was selected to spearhead the US's efforts of military growth.

"She called _me_ because she knew my biophysics work could, if nuclear war were to happen, maybe preserve the human race," Ren said once she finished outlining politics and treaties and skirmishes I couldn't understand. "I worked with cryogenics and stability monitors until I perfected the chamber system, and when things got bad the government put some selected people inside as insurance." She began to braid her hair idly, lost in thought. "We went under not knowin' if the world was really endin' or what, but I guess I've got my answer now."

"The Americas are gone," I said by way of agreement.

She sighed heavily. "I just wish I knew what Mama's weapon actually _did_. It was top secret, even more top secret than _my_ project. I know it has somethin' to do with anti-matter…" Ren snapped her fingers, cornflower eyes alight. "It probably tried to break space-time barriers to subvert matter and compress it, like a black hole."

"Like… wormholes?" I asked.

"Pretty much, yeah."

"So the machine could be why America ended up in Demon World?"

"Maybe." Ren shrugged. "That's the only reason I can think up."

We didn't say anything for a few minutes, thinking about who knows what. I was just trying to get used to this world's radically different past, because oh _wow_, it was _nothing_ like my old world's, when Ren asked: "So how did you n' my showin' up cause so much trouble?"

I decided to start simply. "Well… no one today remembers America," I said. Ren's eyes grew large. "There are no English speakers, history books weren't being written in other cultures when America fell, and the people in charge in Spirit World actually tried to wipe out references to America so no one would try to resurrect our technology again."

Ren frowned. "But if that's true then how did that, y' know, that _Say-show_ guy know about the machine?" she asked. "That doesn't add up."

"It… does," I said, hesitant. "Seishou… he was one of us, one of the people in the pods. The three of us are the only survivors."

Ren sat up.

"It's true," I said. "When Ryu fled to Demon World, we went after him and wound up in the rubble of America. There's a society of demons living there that worships the people in the pods, the people they call Bright Ones, and one of them was old enough to have seen Seishou come out of the pods."

But Ren was shaking her head even as I spoke. "Darlin', I handpicked every last person in those pods, and no one went by the name o' Seishou," she said, running her hands down her shirt in agitation. "Now maybe this Seishou fellow, maybe he's like you and can't remember much, and maybe his name's not really Seishou at all, but even so, no one in the pods had powers like that sonuvabitch." She let out a bark of laughter. "Hell, no one even had _powers_!"

"_We_ both do," I reasoned, and Ren went very quiet. "I don't remember having powers, but they're here now, and you…"

"I don't know where they came from," Ren said quickly, and she looked away.

She was lying so hard I could taste it—her brow knit, she wouldn't look me in the eye, her lips went tight around the corners, and every line of her body screamed to not ask questions, _I'm hiding something, please don't ask! _I wanted to do just that, believe me I did, because she could only be hiding something from me for a good reason, right?

Right?

Hiei's words, however, rang loud inside my ears.

_Her powers came on much too quickly, _I heard him say._ Your abilities took weeks to emerge and even then you needed teachers and practice to do anything _useful_._

_Do not trust her. No matter how deep your bond, you lack five years of your life. She could turn on you in a minute_

Just as I made up my mind to grill her for information, Ren blurted out a question. "So how did you manage to find me in that Demon World place, huh?" she asked, laughing a little to cover her nervousness and how she was quite obviously attempting to change the subject. "And tell me about those people who worshipped us, too. I always wanted to be a goddess and _OH_, you said that you, me, and the Seishou guy were the last of us—what happened to the others?"

_Don't forget to ask her about the powers, Dan_, I instructed myself, but for the moment I was happy to humor her since I needed to talk about the Sisters, anyway. I started from the beginning and went over how I made a gas mask to handle the Demon World's air, then went on to the forest of squirrels and the river and Sioh and getting taken to the Sisters' camp. I skipped around at that point, outlining the mythology of the Bright Ones, their allergy to the air, and their contributions to the Sisters' society before I discussed the Hunt and the feast and how the mask I'd made was to be an offering to Ren, the inadvertent Bright Lady. Then I went over my own role in things, my mother's role in the entire process (leaving out how I thought I was in her body, of course), and on how I woke Ren up.

All during my monologue Ren nodded and commented exactly where she was supposed to, but behind her eyes I could see the wheels turning over on themselves. When I concluded my talk and asked her if she had any questions, she just sat there chewing on her lip until I waved a hand in front of her vacant eyes.

"Earth to Ren," I said.

Ren shuddered. "Sorry. I was thinkin'…" She licked her lips and looked at me out of the corner of her eye, hesitant. "I was thinkin' about what you asked, earlier. About our powers."

_Back to this topic so soon even though you wanted to avoid it?_ I thought, and I mentally wagged a finger at her. _You must have come up with something good._

On the outside, though, I merely smiled. Ren took courage from my look and visibly steeled herself.

"Now it's only a theory, mind ya," she warned me.

"It's probably better than anything I could come up with."

"Well… the chambers weren't self-contained."

We stared at one another, her eyes telling me that her words were clue enough to figure out her obscure meaning, but I was lost. With a sigh she ran her hands through her hair.

"The pods're not big enough to store all the breathable air we need to survive for years at a time," she said. "I installed an air pump and filter into the central power unit, and it routed clean air into our chambers for us to breathe. Our stasis suits filtered the air even further."

"Which kept us from dying in the pods, right?"

"Right. It's just that no filter is _perfect_, you know?"

"No."

She sighed again. "You know how vaccines work, right?"

"I think so," I said. "They put a disease in your system so you'll have an immunity when you really get it?"

Ren nodded, beaming at my knowledge. "Right, darlin'! And the filters, well, they probably couldn't get out _all_ the bad stuff in the air, so…?" She held out her hands, wanting me to finish her sentence.

I obliged: "So tiny bits of it got in?"

"Hell yeah!" Ren said, smacking her knee with a hand. "The longer we stayed in the pods, the more opportunity we had to build up an immunity to the air. You said it yourself that the people who came out of the pods recently lived a lot longer than the ones who came out first!"

"Which is explains why neither you nor I got sick, and why my mom lived for years without getting ill, either!" I said. I bounced in my seat, suddenly excited. "Wait til the others hear about this!"

"And hey, I ain't done!" Ren said. She grabbed my hair to get me to look only at her. "I think the air's what gave us our powers, too."

My attention immediately zeroed in on Ren.

"Now, I'm tellin' you the truth when I say that I didn't have powers before we went into the chambers," she said, looking me dead in the eye to drive her point home (and I believed her, Hiei's opinion notwithstanding). "I liked math and I like biology and I was damn good at both, but warping time? Space?" A cackle. "I didn't think it was possible!"

Me: "So how can you do it, then?"

Ren: "I was thinkin' about it. If demons can breathe the air in Demon World, it means they're all immune and that they've been livin' there long enough for an immunity to be born in their genetic code. It's evolution." She leaned forward and pointed at my nose, eyes glittering. "Now, what if the _air_ is what gives the demons their powers?"

"What do you mean?"

"I _mean_, what if a human wound up in Demon World a billion years ago, and he just _happened_ to have a fluke immunity to the air there, where there's all that free land and no rules?"

"He'd live in Demon World, I guess," I said slowly. "Right?"

"Right," said Ren. "And maybe, just _maybe_, what if in Demon World he found a _lady friend_ with an immunity, too?"

She waggled her eyebrows and made a suggested gesture, prompting me to say: "Then their _kids_ would have an immunity."

"Bingo, baby!" Ren drawled. "They start breedin' and their kids are all immune, and since they can live in Demon World where there's free land and no rules… well, they branch off on the evolutionary tree and make a life outta it."

"… and they eventually populate Demon World?" I guessed.

"Right," Ren said. Her hands batted at the air, trying to paint the picture in her mind. "Now imagine that the toxins in the air, even if they don't kill those first people with immunity—what would they do to them?"

"I don't know, Ren," I said.

"Me neither!" she said. My eyebrows shot up. She just grinned. "That's the beauty of it! They could've developed _superpowers_ thanks to the weird air toxins, because even if they don't die from them the toxins were still in those first demons' _systems_. They live and grow and evolve in this atmosphere, and it warps their genetic code!"

"So you think that we got powers because we became immune to the air… thanks to the pods with _faulty filters_?" I asked incredulously.

Ren nodded happily. "The air tweaks our DNA and wakes up the parts of our brains that normal humans don't use, is what I'm sayin'."

"Wait, what's this about a brain?"

Though Ren's excitement was palpable, as she opened her mouth to speak I could see the hesitation in her eyes. This irked me; I already knew she was keeping secrets, but this was getting ridiculous! These were our brains we were talking about, and I deserved to know what the hell was going on in mine!

"C'mon—tell me," I demanded, mustering all the power I could and forcing it into my tone.

My ploy worked. Ren immediately blurted: "I can _feel_ it, Dani-darlin'! There're parts of my head that are firin' away at each other like cannons, makin' me see and feel things I ain't _never_ felt before! Humans don't use a lot of their brain, but you, but me… oh wow, I've never wanted to give myself an MRI so bad before in my _life_!"

I wasn't as happy as Ren to theorize that my brain had been slowly fucked with by a world's ambient poison, but I _was_ a little relieved to hear her reasoning. Though I could tell she was still keeping something from me, I could see in her bouncy demeanor and devil-may-care grin that her air-DNA-warp-theory wasn't a concoction meant to fool me. She really believed what she was saying, though it seemed like a long shot…

_It explains Mom's power, and mine, and Ren's,_ I thought. _It explains why some Bright Ones died and why some lived longer, and why the earlier ones were so weak compared to the later ones… hell, it might even explain why Ren is so much stronger than me._

Jealousy hit me like a suckerpunch, totally out of nowhere and as unpleasant as a broken nose. Hiei had been right in saying that my powers were slow and useless, but Ren wakes up and BAM, she's practically a god and—

_It's not Ren's fault,_ I counseled myself when I caught myself glaring at her. She was playing with the rocking horse in the corner and didn't notice my internal struggle. _She's just a genius, that's all. Genkai might want to know, and Hiei, and…_

"You OK, darlin'?" Ren asked suddenly.

I had been staring into space. "Oh, I'm fine," I lied, and I looked around for my notebook. "I was just supposed to write down everything I could about America and you in—"

"—a red spiral?" Ren suggested.

I frowned. "How'd you know?"

Her sheepish refusal to meet my eye and the hand rubbing at the back of her neck told me more than any words.

"You already wrote in it, didn't you," I said, and she reached under her pillow before pulling it out to show me the first page. It was covered in numbers and symbol and chickenscratch I could barely make out, and when she flipped the pages one by one I could see she was about halfway through the entire notebook already.

"I wrote down the theories behind my new tricks after I realized I could do them," she said, practically begging me for forgiveness with her subservient tone. "I just thought, you know, the notebook was empty, and…"

"You can go ahead and keep it," I told her. I tried not to look annoyed, but my words came out snappish anyway. "I'll just have to get another one from Genkai, that's all."

She hung her head. "I'm sorry, Dani," she mumbled, and I couldn't help but pat her head.

"It's fine," I said in a more gentle voice. "Genkai probably will want to see your work. Why don't you bring the book with us?"

She raised her head, ever hopeful.

"We should find Genkai, get a new book, and maybe cut this hair of yours," I said, tugging on her forelock gently. "Sound good?"

"I am kinda hungry," she said, shy all of a sudden, and we left the room with the notebook tucked securely under my arm.

* * *

"What do you mean, you need _another one_?"

Wincing, I looked down at Ren's head. I was cutting her hair over the sink while Genkai sat at the table and stirred her tea, and I had just finished a brief explanation of mine and Ren's conversation (though Genkai had refused to hear the details, just the general scheme of things). The notebook request had come at the end of my short talk, scissors cutting gold from Ren's head with small snips and clicks all the while. Ren had fidgeted the whole time; she kept glancing at the window.

"Ren wrote down the math behind her abilities in the first book, and I thought—" I said as I worked on Ren's bangs, but Genkai cut me off.

She held out one gnarled hand. "Let me see."

The notebook was on the counter next to me, and since I was almost done with Ren's hair I said "Just a sec," made a few final snips, and dusted Ren off. Then I took the notebook to Genkai while Ren rinsed off her head under the faucet, cleaning all the fallen hairs from her face and neck. When she stood up and shook her head like a wet dog, I giggled because _really_, she looked so much more like her old self with a shag cut instead of long princess-locks.

Genkai opened the notebook. She handed it back after only a few seconds.

"Those symbols mean nothing to me," she said. "Try translating them into Japanese."

"But what about my other job?"

"Do that, too."

My lips parted in horror. "But that will take—"

"I suggest you start now," Genkai said, smiling as she took a slow slurp of tea.

"Can't I just _tell you_ all I learned?" I griped, slamming into a chair. "I was really hoping I could practice my own stuff—you know, to get a new shift and, you know, maybe learn some offensive moves?"

Genkai put down her cup with a clatter, staring at me.

"… what?" I asked, dubious of her surprised expression.

"You _want_ to practice?" she asked.

"Doesn't it make perfect?"

She sat back in her chair with a humph. "I've gotten too used to Yusuke. The dimwit never wants to train. Enthusiasm is… different."

I didn't tell her that I was feeling insecure of myself after seeing Ren's new abilities, because she didn't need to know that my motives weren't exactly selfless. I did, however, say: "Did you still want to train Ren?"

We both looked at her. She was standing by the window and frowning at it, like she was attempting to see her refection despite how bright it was outside. Her expression was quite possibly the most serious one I'd seen on her face in this world—why was she making it?

"What is she doing?" I muttered, and I was about to go over to her when Genkai grabbed my wrist.

"Get under the table," she said, eyes locked on Ren's back.

"Wait, what?"

"Get under the table!"

I did so, grumbling, and I had just managed to sit cross-legged on the floor when the window exploded.

Yeah.

Exploded.

It sucks to not have spirit awareness, I guess, because Genkai had apparently had enough forewarning to reach Ren's side, push her out of the way, and summon a grey-white-blue barrier between the rest of the kitchen and the window itself, and all I had time to do was shriek and try not to freak the hell out. I watched in horror as glass rocketed in all directions, a few shards slicing through Genkai's hasty shield and cutting her on the hands and arms. She let out a harsh cry and fell onto Ren, the two of them collapsing to the ground as the sink caved in and the kitchen's wall started to fall.

Sunlight poured inside after that, making it hard to see what was happening, but I saw everything from under the table and it made me so confused I almost barfed. Outside through the massive hole in the wall a scene from a very familiar black and white movie played, only it was played in reverse: A dark grey bird, Puu, flew down from the sky with a struggling Keiko in one clawed foot and an unconscious version of myself in the other, and then he put me down on the ground and left me there, my staff jumping from a spot on the ground and into my hand—

_So I dropped it when he picked me up,_ I thought, clear despite the shock of watching this replay itself backwards_. Good to know._

Blood flowed off a puddle on the ground and back into my head for a moment or two, my face pale and pasty and plain against the stone courtyard, and then Puu came back, lit on the ground, and suddenly I was flying backward into the house as Puu shoved Keiko inside as if he were putting a doll back into its house. Glass flew from the ground back up into the window, edging his claws like lace. The wall rebuilt around his leg as I grabbed Keiko's waist and struggled to keep her close, and then Puu let Keiko go and retracted his arm (glass reformed the panes with a glittering and swirl) and she and I were standing by the sink and arguing.

My phantom and hers traded words for a few seconds before fading away, and with our images went the image of the undamaged sink and window and wall, revealing the destruction Puu had originally wrought that lurked behind a perfect façade.

"Genkai?" was the first thing to come out of my mouth when silence descended over the kitchen. I scrambled out from under the table and crawled to Genkai, who was lying on top of Ren to shield her. I pulled them apart and rolled Genkai onto her back, cupping her face so I could try to see if—

Her eyes snapped open. In a millisecond she was standing and pulling Ren up to her face by the collar of my friend's shirt, and before I could react she had slapped Ren's dazed cheek with a resounding crack.

Ren, however, didn't seem to feel it. She was muttering to herself in a low voice, eyes locked on the window as she said: "The lines uncrossed, they _uncrossed_, I crossed them but they didn't stay, why didn't they stay, they promised they'd stay, they _promised_—"

The door to the kitchen burst open behind us. I stood, turning to see Yusuke leading the charge into the kitchen with Hiei, Kurama, and Kuwabara hot on his heels. Hiei blurred into a black smudge before reappearing next to me; he took my upper arms in his hands and got all up in my face, demanding: "What happened?"

I gaped at him, then darted a glance at the collapsed wall. His eyes followed. He did not let me go.

Genkai dropped Ren onto the floor with little ceremony. The woman thudded to the ground and lay there, staring at the ceiling with eyes that saw little. Her muttering didn't stop, drifting sibilantly in the background: "They _promised_ the lines would stay!"

_… they?_

"What the hell happened in here?" Yusuke said, voice raising an octave. "I thought Ren fixed the kitchen!"

"So did we all," Genkai snapped, and she glared down at Ren. "It seems we weren't the only ones who overestimated her competency."

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"It means her powers reversed themselves," Genkai said. "We saw the past replay itself to put the kitchen back the way it was before Ren intervened and rewound time." She looked at me, eyes terribly hard. "The only question is 'why'."

"Why?" Yusuke said, and the words coming out of his mouth seemed surreally ironic. "You're asking _why_? It's because she's never had any _practice_!"

"Oh like _you're_ one to talk, Urameshi," Kuwabara said, but Yusuke shushed him and rounded on me.

"She's _your_ responsibility, Dani!" Yusuke yelled. "Keep that freak on a leash, dammit!"

Despite the fact that I couldn't see why Yusuke was mad at _me_, of all people, because what the heck had _I_ done?, I didn't have any qualms about getting angry right back at him for calling Ren a name. "Don't call Ren a freak!" I yelled, shoving Hiei off of me so I could march toward Yusuke. "She didn't mean to do anything wrong!"

"She destroyed half the temple!"

"It isn't her fault! She's new at this!"

"She should never have been messing around with her powers on her own in the first place!" he said, putting his hands on his hips and glaring at me. "You need training to focus properly, or else shit like this happens!"

"But Ren's a genius!"

"So? No matter how smart you are, you still need practice! You _idiot_! Remember what happened to your eyes the first time you shifted?"

"I've already _had_ this lecture today, thanks _so_ much!" I snapped. "Have you and Hiei been planning this or something?"

"We've been discussing Ren for the last hour, as a matter of fact," Kurama said in a calm voice. I wheeled on him, prepared to defend my friend at all costs, but his guileless eyes stopped me cold. His next words came smoothly and without bias: "Hiei and Yusuke are of the opinion that her abilities are unnatural. Kuwabara wishes to give Ren a chance to prove herself."

"Thank you!" I said to Kuwabara, and he shrugged. "What about you, Kurama?"

"I wish to observe her at greater length before making a decision," he said. He glanced at Hiei and Yusuke. "Not that that option has been well received…"

Hiei bristled. "Your waiting will get you killed someday," he spat.

"What is she blabbering about?"

We all turned to Kuwabara. He was staring at Ren, obviously worried, because she had pulled her knees to her chest and was rocking and talking a mile a minute, like… like a deranged mental patient, or something, and what was up with _that_?

"Dani, try to figure out what went wrong with her power," Genkai told me. She was rolling up her bloody sleeves, revealing the smattering of gashes on her wrinkled forearms. "And try to get her to stop talking. It's irritating."

"Right," I said, eyes on the blood. For Ren, I said: "She'll be really sorry for that. Really, she will."

Genkai snorted. "I've had worse."

Taking that as some sort of absolution, I crossed to Ren, tried to ignore the boys, and knelt down in front of her. I pried her hands off of her knees and held them in mine, stroking their backs with my thumbs until eventually she stopped muttering. I cupped her cheek in my hand and rubbed the crest under her eye soothingly, smiling when her eyes tried to find mine for solace.

"The lines uncrossed," she said hoarsely, desperate for compassion of some kind. "It… it _hurt_."

Patiently: "What hurt, Ren?"

"The blue and the red, I cross them to reverse the space," she babbled, "but they _uncrossed_. It felt like, it felt like my _soul_ got ripped in two! But they told me they wouldn't uncross once I crossed them! They told me—"

"Wait, who told you _what_, now?" I asked. _Did she talk to Genkai about her powers or something? But no one here speaks English!_

_No one… except…_

"_They_ did," she said, shaking her head from side to side. "_They_ showed me how to do it and said—"

"Wait," I said, interrupting her. "Someone _showed you_ how to use your powers?"

Slowly, my lying best friend nodded. As soon as she did I saw a measure of relief steal over her, recalling our earlier conversation. She had not wanted to discuss the origin of her powers, and now she was hinting at…

Suspicion hit me with the force of a train, horrible suspicion impossible to push aside. I almost couldn't find the will to speak again.

"But Ren," I said, unable to keep my voice from shaking, "you said you figured out that you had powers all on your own, after you saw _me_ use _mine_."

She bit her lip. I knew it meant she felt guilty.

"You lied to me," I concluded. "Someone _showed you_ your abilities." My hand tightened on her cheek on reflex when I asked: "Who were you talking to, exactly?"

Blue eyes fluttered shut, chest rising and falling under stress. "They told me not to tell," she moaned, but I grabbed her chin and forced her to look straight into my eyes.

"Who were you talking to, Ren?" I demanded.

Helpless, she replied: "_They_ did."

"And who are _they, _Ren?" I said. "Who _are_ they?"

She looked away. I tugged her face back to me. Her hand felt cold in mine.

"_They_ are the ones," she said, "in my dreams!"

My entire body went cold. "I don't understand," I whispered, but I was beginning to think I really did and that scared me more than anything in the world. "I don't understa—"

Ren wrenched out of my grip and put her face in her hands. "They said you'd be angry that I was talkin' to them!" she cried. "They said you'd be jealous that they didn't choose you!"

"Ren—"

"They said you would call them a _beast_!"

The world blackened at the corners of my eyes, driving dark into my vision so all I could see was the blonde of Ren's hair and the shadow of her words. All my uneasiness, my suspicions, my fears half-born and still incubating the womb of my horror—

_They said you would call them a beast, the ones in my dreams—_

_Dreams-_

_Beast-_

_Dreams-_

_Beast-_

I was saying his name before I realized my mouth was moving. "Hiei," I gasped, then yelled: "HIEI!"

He was behind me in an instant, hand on my shoulder as I pushed back from Ren and stared at her, horrified and speechless. "What's wrong?" Hiei snarled, but all I did was reach up to grab his fingers in order to feel something other than the sheer terror that had me in its grip, but even the hot comfort of his skin left me feeling colder than before. "Woman, what is going o—"

"Tell me I'm not crazy, Hiei," I stammered, "tell me I didn't just hallucinate," and then the itchy sparkle of his mind hammered into mine and wrenched my memory clear, turning over mine and Ren's conversation the way an ocean tosses a pebble. Hiei growled above me, hands going murderously tight against my collarbone, and when I whimpered in sudden pain he let go of my shoulders with a snap.

"Genkai," Hiei said, and I turned in time to see him press a fingertip to the old woman's forehead. Her rheumy eyes closed briefly before opening, showing hardened whites and startled pupils, and as Hiei moved to show the others what I had seen Genkai stepped forward, crossed to Ren, and knelt in front of her.

"Ask her what she saw in her dreams, Dani," Genkai said, voice pitched so low I could hardly hear her. "Ask her what she and the Beasts talked about, and what she gave them in return for their help."

I crawled to Ren, putting my arms around her because she had started to cry.

"It hurts," she kept saying. "The lines uncrossed, and it _hurts_."

"I need you to tell me what the people in your dreams said to you, Ren," I said cajolingly, stroking her short crop of hair with my fingers. "Tell me, OK? And tell me what they looked like."

She sniffed and turned her face into the crook of my neck. Tears stung my skin hotly.

"They looked," she said, and shuddered. "They looked like _you_."

"They looked like me," I told Genkai, voice cracking on the last word. The psychic nodded, lips thinned.

Ren kept going: "But I knew it wasn't _you_—don't know how, but I _did_, and they turned into my mama instead."

_Not good. Ren's mother is one of the few who can control Ren,_ I thought, and asked: "And then what happened?"

She sniffed some more, but her tears had dried at that point. "They said I had power inside me, and that they could wake it up," she mumbled into my neck. "They said I could protect _you_ with it."

I swallowed down the lump in my throat with difficulty, then told Genkai what Ren said.

"They don't give anything for free," Genkai snarled, fury shining all over her face. "What did she give them in return?"

I asked Ren the question. She lifted her head and twisted her body away from me, a sudden smile breaking through the cloud of her pain and confusion.

"They asked me to release them," she said, and grinned. "But I drove a hard bargain. I told them that I'd think about releasin' them if they let me have my powers—like a test drive, ya see?"

"And now your trial period has expired," I murmured, and I turned to Genkai.

"Well?" she asked impatiently.

I told her: "They asked to be released. Ren told them she wanted to test her powers before she made a decision."

"That's something, at least," Genkai said, and she looked at Ren (who stared right back as if nothing at all was wrong, her trademark mood swings working their abrupt magic). "Look at me," she demanded harshly, and even though the words were in Japanese Ren still managed to obey. She and Genkai stared into one another's eyes for a long moment; then, without a word, Genkai grasped Ren's face in her hand and let out a vicious roar, a roar that made the hair on the back of my neck stand to full attention. Genkai's entire body glowed blue, bleaching out the frightened cornflower eyes peeking between her splayed fingers, and with another roar the light drove itself deep into Ren's eyes, making them glow and pulse even as she screamed beneath Genkai's hand, twitching and jerking in my arms so hard I almost lost my grip. The light left Genkai in steady waves and pooled inside of Ren, glowing out her mouth and ears and nose and eyes like a cobalt jackolantern, only there was nothing festive about Ren's small screams and arching spine.

"What are you doing to her!" I yelled, trying to keep Ren still against me.

Genkai merely roared: "SPIRIT WAVE!"

* * *

Ren collapsed afterward, limp and shivering on the floor. Kuwabara took her back to our room with Yukina's help. I wanted to go with them and make sure she was comfortable, but Genkai insisted I stick with her, Hiei, Yusuke, and Kurama when we moved to one of the tearooms, the kitchen being covered in debris and missing one of its walls.

"I sealed her powers away," Genkai told me when I asked when that had all been about. She pulled a pipe from her coat and lit it with a match, filling the room with aromatic smoke. "To ever use them again, she'll have to actually _learn_ how. No shortcuts, no gimmicks—just training." She paused for a moment to take a hit off her pipe. "Training, like I did to learn how to seal people's powers with the Spirit Wave. With enough practice, fine manipulation becomes easier to handle."

_Makes sense._ "So she's at square one?"

"That's what I was aiming for," Genkai said. "She'll be like you were at the beginning, only she'll have an even harder time than _you_ did, if I'm reading her right. She's used to floating on her intellect."

It was true, though I didn't say so, and a small part of me was suddenly glad for Ren's lack of ability. Jealousy certainly was an ugly thing, but triumph… that was sweet indeed.

_Looks like I'm the main character again,_ I thought, and I resisted the urge to preen with a mental scowl. _Ugh, don't get full of yourself, Dan!_

"We'll start training her to access theta state and her energy reserves," Genkai continued. "If the Book is targeting her, she needs to learn how to repel it. No sense in tempting her with their help again."

"I'll start tomorrow," I said.

But Genkai, to my surprise, shook her head. "You need to work on your own abilities," she said between puffs on her pipe. "You and Hiei will work on them together, starting tomorrow."

I looked at the fire demon with a small gasp, happy at this prospect and at the sight of the pleased smirk hovering at the corners of his lips, but then…

"But no one else speaks English—" I began, and I was cut off.

"I've gotten past a language barrier before," Genkai snapped. "Teach me a few phrases and give her some basic words of Japanese and there's nothing a good old fashioned smack can't get across in the gaps."

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "She's serious, by the way. Expect Ren to come home with bruises."

I would have laughed had I not been so bummed out over Ren's brief foray into the fabled Dark Side. "This is all my fault," I said, staring at the teatable before me. "Had I gotten to talk to her more instead of wasting time showing off my powers, maybe she wouldn't have been tempted by the Book at all. I could have prepar—"

"What's done is done," Hiei snapped. He leaned on the wall next to the door, eyes closed. "You'll tell her when she wakes."

"I still haven't gotten to write everything down, either," I said.

"I'll get you a new book," Genkai told me. From nowhere she pulled out the weird red notebook and tossed it to me; I barely managed to catch the thing, and when I did I saw that her mouth boasted the ghost of a small smile. "Keep Ren busy with this one, but make sure she doesn't ruin the new one this time, hm?"

My lips parted, a reply forming on my tongue, but then it promptly died when the door to the room clattered open. We all stared at the figures in the doorway in shock, until their leader decided it was time to speak.

"Where," Koenma said as he stared at us down the line of his nose, "is the Bright Lady?"

Behind him, Botan looked at us, grinned, and waved.

* * *

NOTES:

_Did you guys REALLY think I was going to let Ren get away with having super powers, or that she'd take over the story? Really? REALLY? Ye of little faith… (*mutters darkly and sits in a corner, feeling like no one trusts her at all*) The negative backlash after the last chapter was staggering. _

_But hey, at least now we know how they got the powers in the first place? I KNEW I WAS WRITING ABOUT THE AIR IN DEMON WORLD FOR A GOOD REASON! The concept of the air thing will be expanded upon in the next chapter, so if there are holes in the theory I'll say right now that they'll probably get filled in. _

_And now you know what happened to America in this weird alternate universe. Want details on how America got so advanced before the rest of the world? It doesn't matter to this story, but hey, I have the deets in my head if anyone wants to hear. _

_So, yeah… Ren has the know-how, but she can't actually _do anything_ useful anymore. Which sucks. Ho hum. Her powers, shortlived as they were, will be discussed further. And the _Beasts_! I don't think anyone saw that little wrinkle coming—at least, no one reviewed to tell me that Ren and the Beasts had already had a powwow, but eh, one of you MUST have been thinking it…_

_Also: DANI'S SECRET-KEEPING. I had several comments last week that cite how Dani has kept her secret for a lot longer than most people probably could, and this gets addressed very soon. Hold on to your hats!_

_Some of you might have noticed that I deleted a few stories of mine earlier this week. I did this because I knew I wasn't going to work on them for a long time and that they were cluttering up my page. I'll come back to them some day, but for now I want to focus on my other stories._

_Also, if any of you are on deviantART, I started a Kuwabara fanclub! He didn't have one and I felt that niche needed to be filled, so please join it if you can! _

_THANKS SO MUCH! YOU ARE ALL ROCKSTARS WHO DESERVE CAKE! Because cake is delicious and I love you. Reclun, Ephermeral Muse, Fire-Kitsune-Hanyou, lilmickey2008, Ketsurui Kazutaka, etowa-ru, Fuurai, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, DoilyRox, unknown player, AmoreVampiresv-v, double-a-battery, darkravensnight, hieisdarkdragonchick, anon, Koryu Elric, spiritfoxxx821, Yoko Kiara14, ephemeral violet, Cheshire Blue Kitten, chocolateluvr13, Kai-chan94, WorldsAngel, moani-sama, WishingWanderer, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Supreme Baka, j.d.y., AkaMizu-chan, Gartabro, Kaiya's Watergarden, MikaUchiha666, Angel of Randomosity, Foxgirl Ray, nanisan, Masuyo Shun, Crimson Snow Eye, Snowgirl 7589, and TallyYoungblood!_


	61. Chapter 61: Calling You

Future Talk

Chapter 61:

"Calling You"

* * *

Have you ever had a Hoper Simpson moment? Like, a moment where you want to just close your eyes, maybe slap yourself across the face, and say "D'oh!" in an obnoxious voice?

I ask because the minute I saw Koenma standing in that doorway, hands braced on the frame and hair mussed atop his head, I wanted to have one. His panicked expression reminded me of his future counterpart's and suddenly all I wanted to do was slip inside theta's darkness and scream out his name, call him to me, and ask him all the questions nagging at my brain. I wanted to grab his collar and shake him senseless, demand he tell me more about Ren and the true past and just, just _everything_, and this shamed me because the tumult of those thoughts had somehow slipped onto the backburner during all the recent excitement.

Koenma, however, was not nearly so ADD about his desire for information. When no one said anything (still a bit shocked at his appearance, I suppose) he strode on in and planted his feet and snarled: "Somebody start talking!"

Behind him, Botan looked awkward, waved at us with apology smeared across her face, and darted off down the hall.

Genkai sighed wearily. Kurama looked at the ceiling, face set into a mask of innocence even though his eyes gleamed. Yusuke fidgeted. Hiei kept his eyes closed.

Me having the baby face that I do and the wide-shocked-vulnerable stare of a newborn deer, I suppose it's only natural Koenma started picking on me. "You!" he snapped, and a few steps later he had approached, bent at the waist, and was shouting right into my face—really, it was a wonder his pacifier didn't fall out. "You! _You're_ the one who started all of this, so _you_ need to be the one to clean it up!"

"Hey, don't get mad at me!" I snapped right back. Koenma flinched, surprised by my vehemence (which was most likely born of my earlier frustrations regarding the other Koenma, but their faces were similar and the emotion carried over). "I'm just trying to survive in this crazy place, OK? I don't need you yelling at me!"

He recovered from his flinch with a vengeance. "Well, I'm _going_ to yell at you unless you tell me exactly what's going on!"

"Well, I regret to inform you that I _can't_!"

"Why the heck not?"

I pointed at the psychic in question. "Because Genkai wants me to write it all down, that's why!" I said, lurching at Koenma a bit to drive home the issue. "She keeps shutting me up every time I try to talk to her about anything!"

Koenma pulled back, surprised, and he looked at Genkai with a face that said What the hell, Why the hell, and How the hell, all at the same time (what a talent that Koenma had!).

Genkai wasn't fazed as she took a hit off her long pipe. She said with a breath full of blue-grey smoke: "I figured if their stories ever changed from what was on paper, we'd be able to figure out if they were lying."

My eyebrows shot up. That was a suspicious gesture if there ever was one, but Genkai hadn't seemed particularly perturbed by Ren's show of powers or, or _anything_ that had gone on as of late. When had she started feeling that way?

She answered my unspoken questions a second after I thought them. "The precaution was especially necessary after Ren's powers surfaced," she said with a loaded smirk. "She seemed far too perfect to be true, and I did not want to risk any chances that she might not be as benign as Dani makes her out to be."

I couldn't help but gape at her. She caught my eye, smirk growing until she almost grinned.

"What?" she asked. "You didn't think I wouldn't be suspicious of you both after she managed to reconstruct an entire _wall_?"

_And here I was thinking she was just being particularly understanding_… I swallowed, unsure of myself, but I somehow managed to tell her: "You… are a good actress, Genkai."

"And you are very trusting, Dani."

"As touching as your little exchange of compliments may be," Koenma said, tone dry, "the time for that precaution is past. I want a report on the Bright Lady, and I want it now!"

On reflex, I looked to Genkai. She nodded after a small hesitation, and after a deep breath I began to talk.

"Well," I said, "you see, I lived in a country called the United States, and it got a little greedy…"

* * *

One bombing, one set of cryogenic chambers, and one world war later, I had told them everything I knew.

"Ren even has a theory about how she and I and, and maybe even Seishou—well, she thinks we got our demon energy stuff from the air in Demon World," I said. "She was saying that the pods had air filters, but they weren't perfect and we got exposed to little snippets of the air at a time. Since the first people out of the pods died quickly and the later ones died much more slowly, she thinks that over ten thousand years we built up immunities and maybe had our genetics get warped by the atmosphere."

"Did the earlier Bright Ones have powers like yours?" Kurama wanted to know.

"I don't know," I said after thinking about it for a minute or two. "I don't remember it getting mentioned, and I didn't think to ask. It would have blown my cover."

He nodded, green eyes trained on something not in the room. "If we knew that information,"  
he said, "we could effectively prove or disprove Ren's theory." A hand went up to cup his narrow chin. "I heard talk, long ago, of a human's soul being tainted by something in Demon World, granting them demonhood, but I always assumed the story to be a myth until now."

Yusuke's eyes popped open (they had drifted shut while I explained the past) and he frowned, lips puckering in thought. "Now why does that sound familiar?" he muttered.

"Did you hear the same story in Demon World, Yusuke?" Genkai asked.

"Nah, Hokushin wasn't much for fairytales," he said dismissively, but he still looked troubled. "I just think I've heard of this somewhere, but I can't…" He poked his knee. "You know, put my finger on it?"

Gently, and with a teasing sparkle in his eye, Kurama said: "You know, school teaches you how to use your brain, Yusuke."

"Oh, shut it!" the detective snapped. "Even with your school I'm still worth seven of—"

Yusuke stopped, suddenly, eyes wide and staring past the room and into something beyond. A moment passed, one in which we all sat frozen, and then he slapped his knee with his fist and grinned from ear to ear.

"I know where I've heard that line before!" he said, full of triumph and glee. "Suzaku!"

"The Saint Beast?" Genkai asked with a frown.

"Yeah!" Yusuke laughed out loud. "Man, I haven't thought about that freak in years! He had some weird-ass shoes!"

"What does he have to do with anything, dimwit?"

Yusuke's jovial mood lessened somewhat. "I don't really know, but when he had me strung up by all his clones and was making fun of me, telling me how Keiko was going to die…" He trailed off, unhappy at the memory. "Anyway, he told me that if I, uh, ate Keiko's heart once she died, that he'd… I _think_ he said he'd 'purify my soul in Demon World' to turn me into a demon or something, something gross like that, anyway."

"He could have been referring to using the air to warp you from the inside out, I suppose," Kurama said slowly. "I don't know how he could have managed it, but…"

"I do."

I may have been the only one who gasped, but everyone else looked as surprised as I felt so I didn't feel too bad about it. Everyone turned to look at Hiei, who still had his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes shut tight.

"I've never seen it done," he said, voice colored with distaste, "but I once fell in with a group of rogues who had a human pet."

"Pet?" Yusuke asked, looking like he'd seen something disturbing. "Like… an on-a-leash pet?"

"Pet, slave, whatever," Hiei said. "I don't care what they called it."

Yusuke and I exchanged an icked-out glance. I mouthed: 'What the hell?'

Yusuke mouthed back: 'Fuckin' creepy!'

"How did they manage to keep their 'pet' alive?" Kurama was asking, scarlet eyebrows shooting up to join the rest of his hairline.

Hiei's eyes opened; they did not look happy. "He survived because the thieves pooled their auras together and invaded his body with them," he spat. "It changed the human. He went insane, but the air had no affect on him."

"And did his energy feel like a demon's?" Genkai asked.

Hiei only shrugged. "I don't remember," he said. "It was a long time ago."

Kuwabara and Yukina chose that moment to enter the room, paper door sliding open to show them standing in the hall. Both looked taken aback by Koenma's appearance, but it was only Kuwabara who voiced a question. Yukina simply smiled at us all and took a seat to the left of Kurama and Yusuke.

"Hey, why're _you_ here?" Kuwabara said as he moved to sit between Yusuke and Yukina.

"Why shouldn't I be?" the prince of the Spirit World asked.

Kuwabara shrugged. "I dunno," he said. "I just thought I'd ask."

Suddenly, in a voice full of confused derision, Yusuke said: "Kuwabara… why aren't you wearing a shirt?"

That was when I noticed: Yusuke had a major point. Kuwabara wore only an undershirt, clingy and white across his broad chest, with no sleeves, and below that he had on his jeans from earlier. The shirt was much too small to be decent, even for a guy, so it was most definitely meant to be an undershirt.

Kuwabara's face colored, but he looked more annoyed than embarrassed. "Ren was sweating real bad," he grumbled, but then he saw Yukina's worried face and cracked a smile. "She needed to change clothes, but I was wearing my only clean shirt, so…"

"Thanks for the sacrifice," I told him, and he sighed before shooting a sheepish smile.

"It's nothin'. I just need to do laundry, that's all."

Yukina's lips had pursed during our chitchat. "If I may suggest something?" she said softly; everyone looked at her as she braced her small fists atop her knees and steeled herself to be assertive. "We need to purchase clothing for Ren," she said, "unless we wish to do the laundry even more often than we currently do. If permitted, I could go into town and buy her a small wardrobe."

Her offer started a rapid-fire chain of associations in my head, one that went a little like: Town, shopping, Keiko likes shopping, wait _Keiko_, town, Sakana—festival!

"That's a great idea!" I gushed, struck by a burst of girly inspiration when I glanced at Yusuke. "And Yusuke, Keiko was telling me about a festival this weekend—"

He flinched. "She told you about that?"

I nodded. "Girls talk, Yusuke. It's what we do when we're stressed."

"Oh."

"Yeah," I said. I dropped my voice to a conspiratorial half-whisper: "But Yusuke, if we went _shopping,_ we'd have to go into _town_, where the _festival_ is…" When nothing seemed to click for him, I sighed and spelled the whole thing out. "If we went into town this weekend, you could make good on that little _promise_ of yours…?"

The lightbulb went on. "Hell yeah!" he said, pumping a fist into the air. "I'll take her to see the fireworks! That'll get me out of the doghouse for sure!"

"Perfect!" I said.

The excitement of the moment had affected Kuwabara as well. "And hey, Yukina," he said, "you've always wanted to see a human celebration, so maybe I could come along and show you the ropes?"

I saw her desire to shoot him down before he even finished speaking, and it broke my heart that Kuwabara noticed it, too. His voice faltered, dropped, and he looked down at the floor when he mumbled a last-ditch attempt to come along: "You'll need a guard, after all, and Keiko has Yusuke…"

It took Yukina a long time—a time in which I saw resolution, weakness, sadness, and grief pass across her face—before she could say: "I suppose that would be… acceptable."

Kuwabara all but melted.

Before Yusuke could nudge him in the ribs and tell him to wipe the happy tears from his eyes, I endeavored to switch focus because everyone was staring at Kuwabara and Yukina and they did _not_ need that kind of pressure (especially the kind Hiei was glaring at them)! I clapped my hands together, beamed, and once everyone was looking at me I said: "Great! Ren and I can come too, and—"

"And nothing. None of you are going."

Yukina, Kuwabara, Yusuke and I all looked at Genkai in shock. Hiei and Kurama and Koenma seemed nonplussed.

"What?" Yusuke asked, hopes and dreams of making Keiko happy deflating. "Why?"

Genkai snorted. "It's not obvious? We are _not_ leaving the Book unprotected, not when Seishou and Ryu are both MIA, and we are _not_ allowing any of us to leave the temple unguarded."

"But Genkai—"

"The answer is no," she snapped. "We can't spare any fighters, not even one."

Yukina quietly reminded her: "But Ren's clothes…"

Genkai shrugged. "We'll just have to order clothes and have them delivered here." Her pipe had stopped burning; she set it on the teatable with a click. "They'll come faster than next weekend, anyway."

"Actually… all of you can go."

The entire room did yet another quick-turn-to-look-at-the-person-who-had-unexpectedly-spoken, who in this case was Koenma (as a side note, I was really, REALLY getting tired of all these mini-revelations; they were giving me a horrible case of whiplash). No one spoke for a few seconds; I don't think anyone could have if they tried, I think, because Koenma defying all logic wasn't something that happened every single day.

Koenma picked up on our collective confusion, thankfully, and chose to clarify his statement. "All of you can go," he repeated. When we still didn't speak, he added: "To the festival, that is."

Kurama spoke first with the simple and appropriate question of: "Why?"

The question prompted a series of curious emotions, all of which ran through Koenma's face in a flash of seconds. I saw brooding displeasure mixed with determination, first, and following it came forced self-assurance and confidence that border-lined on arrogance. What did _that_ mean?

"Before you all left for Demon World," he said a moment later, "I had a meeting with the SDF."

"Oh?" said Genkai.

She gestured at the floor; Koenma sat down across the table from the old psychic, sitting so close to me on my left side that I had to resist the urge to scoot away. He didn't smell like the Koenma I knew—he wore cologne and his hair was much neater than the shaggy Koenma I was used to seeing, and I didn't like that one bit. He was too… put together, for me.

_I really need to talk to _my_ Koenma,_ I thought fretfully, and that was when I noticed Hiei staring at me, eyes calculating and narrowed as they took in whatever mood I was projecting. I smiled at him, unnerved by his scrutiny, and he returned the look with a scowl.

_You and I_, his cherry-red eyes said, _are going to have a talk soon._

I swallowed. Hiei's scowl deepened.

Next to me, Koenma cleared his throat. "If Ryu is after the Book and Seishou is after the Bright Lady—"

I automatically corrected him. "Ren," I said, frowning, and he waved a dismissive hand.

"Whatever," he said. "We have two enemies after different things, which means we might spread ourselves too thin across the board if we try protecting them both."

This seemed to both please and irk Genkai. "Even more reason why we shouldn't go to a stupid festival!" she growled, brown eyes glittering. "We need to concentrate our efforts here!"

Koenma's lips pursed. "Genkai, listen," he said. "This situation has gotten out of control. If what Botan told me is true, that Ryu and Seishou are no longer working together, it means we are facing a whole host of unforeseen complications. We need to settle at least _one_ aspect of this case soon."

"And your liaison with the SDF figured something out, I assume?" Kurama said dryly.

Koenma nodded. "I think I can take care of the Book, finally."

Yusuke sat up straighter. "'Take care of the Book' _how_?" he demanded. "And why didn't you mention this _two months ago_, you big baby?"

Koenma was unamused at Yusuke's name-calling and snapped: "I didn't mention it because I didn't know it was an option!" He cleared his throat, composing himself again. "The SDF's head of barrier seals has been doing research. After our last attempt to take the Book back into Spirit World—"

Genkai's hand slammed onto the tabletop. "You nearly destroyed my temple with that little stunt!" she hissed. "What makes you think I'd let you pull another—"

"Will you let me finish!"

Grumble, grumble, grumble—that was Genkai's response, and Koenma accepted it as readily as he would have accepted actual words.

"_Thank_ you," he quipped, eyes rolling. "As I was saying, the head of the seals department found a tactic she thinks might be successful in sealing the Book back into its rightful place of containment in Spirit World."

Kuwabara: "And you didn't know about it before, because…?"

"Because it's a forbidden seal, that's why," Koenma said testily. "We dug through the vaults with all the manpower we had and we _still_ barely found it in time for today. My father obviously didn't want anyone to use it against him during his little reign of terror."

"And the Book merits the resurrection of such a dangerous seal?" Kurama asked.

The prince's eyes darkened considerably at the thought; his pacifier bobbed angrily as he sucked on it.

"The Book," he said at last, "is arguably the most worrisome aspect of this entire case. I'm not even sure of the full extent of its power, but what little is known about it was enough to force my father into securing it in the deepest pits of our treasury, places that could serve as prisons even more formidable than the ones we employ for A-class demons."

"Wow," Yusuke whispered.

"Wow, indeed," said Koenma. "The Book is more than deserving of this seal, should it work."

"You mean you don't know if it will?" Genkai growled. Threats on her beloved temple obviously didn't sit well with her.

Koenma shook his head. "The seal is very finicky, hence my SDF leaders' reluctance to use it."

"Finicky?" I repeated. "How can a seal be finicky?"

He sighed. "The seal is incredibly sensitive to spiritual power. It can tolerate very little interference. The only people permitted within ten kilometers of the sealing sight are the people performing the spell. Anyone with spiritual power _not_ performing the spell will get sealed in right alongside with the Book."

"So the seal is a magnet-type, then?" Genkai asked.

Koenma's answer was solemn. "It's the most powerful magnetic spell in existence, to my knowledge," he said. "Capable of trapping anything, but with little room for error or complication, and even less of an ability to actually aim the thing."

To Yusuke, the only logical question to ask was: "And we don't just use the stupid seal to suck Seishou into a jar, _because_?"

Kuwabara, lo and behold, had the answer! "He'd get sucked into the jar with the Book, dumbass!" he said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "That'd be like givin' him what he wants on a silver platter!"

Yusuke grimaced. "Point taken."

I don't think anyone but me was listening to Yusuke and Kuwabara as they started to bicker, least of all Kurama, because he pitched his voice above theirs to ask: "So you're saying that you want us to make ourselves scarce during this ritual, correct?"

"Precisely," said Koenma. "You can't be near here while we work on locking up the Book. I would have asked you to leave, anyway."

"Taking the Book off of our hands could be a very good thing, indeed." Kurama's eyes darkened; you could see his mind tumbling about the possibilities. "Additionally," he said, "separating the Bright Lady from our usual place of residence may make finding her a bit more difficult for Ryu. Should he choose to raid the temple during our trip, he would find not only the prince of the Spirit World waiting for him, but a fully armed squadron of the Spirit World's top fighters as well." He raised his eyes, looking to meet Genkai's. "We have the opportunity to fell several birds with this proverbial stone," he said, questing for her approval. "Least of all Ren's clothes, but even that would be a bonus."

"Precisely!" Koenma repeated. "My point, _precisely_!"

Genkai reached into the fold of her robe and brought out a small paper packet. When she opened it, I could smell her fragrant smoking tobacco.

"When did you want to perform this seal?" she asked as she packed her pipe with gnarled fingers. Practiced ease made her movement flow fluidly over the pipe's gold mouthpiece, bowl, and filigree.

"We need a few more days to prepare," Koenma said, watching her take out a matchbook and strike one.

"Hm," she articulated as she put the pipe's thin stem between her teeth. The plant ignited beneath the match; she inhaled to keep the fire going, then exhaled blue smoke right into my face. When I coughed, she said: "Sorry."

"S'fine," I managed to choke out, but I scooted back to get out of the line of fire. I ended up between Yusuke and Kuwabara, who moved a little to make more room for me with a smile.

Genkai looked away and turned her gaze on Yusuke. "What day was that festival of Keiko's?"

He blinked at her. Eloquently: "Huh?"

"The festival, dimwit—when is it?"

He obviously couldn't remember. "It's, um, it's on…"

"Sunday," I muttered out of the corner of my mouth, studying my nails.

"Sunday! It's on Sunday!" He coughed twice, covering his mouth so he could say between the blasts: "Thanks, Dan!"

I coughed out my reply: "No, prob!"

"We'll clear out of here on Friday, then," Genkai said, blowing a ring of smoke at Koenma's face (she did not apologize for this, unlike she had with me). "We'll come back Monday night. Get your ass in gear and get out before we get back."

"Of course," Koenma said. He did not look like he meant it, nor did he look happy at her obvious dismissal of him (she and Kurama had begun to speak in low voices, clearly showcasing their desire to end the conversation). I didn't like the tension; Koenma was staring at them, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Yukina and I were all feeling awkward, like unfortunate spectators, and…

"Well, great!" I said when the silence became too much to bear, and I stood up. When everyone stared at me like I was a crazy jack-in-the-box, I beamed and chirped: "I'm gonna go tell Keiko about this. It'll make her day!"

Genkai, however, wasn't having any of that. "Sit down!" she snarled, smoke pouring from her wizened lips like a dragon. "You're not going anywhere!"

"What? Why the heck not?" I asked, utterly confused and more than a little gunshy thanks to her tone. All I'd done was stand up, why was she—

Another growl, another glare. "Sit, Dani!"

"I already told you all about America!" I protested. "I told you everything Ren told me, so why do I need to stay—"

"Just do as I say!"

"Hey, I'm an adult, I can make my own life choices!" I snapped, and I took a step toward the door. Hiei caught my eye when I took a second step, and then a third, and when I put my hand on the latch to leave he let out a low growl.

"Don't," he said from between his teeth.

I almost backed off from the force of his glare (wait, _he_ was against me, _too_?) but I steeled my nerves and yanked the door open anyway, preparing to turn and tell them all that they were being stupid and that I could go if I wanted to, that Keiko needed to be told what was happening and that I needed to check on Re—

And then something swept across my face.

It felt, for lack of a better term, like someone inside of my head had reached _out through my skull_, grabbed my skin in its hands, and yanked it inward and pushed it outward at the same time, imploding my head while it exploded it all in one terrifying rush of red-hot, white-cold, blue-crushed pain. I screamed with a mixture of shock and fright as my spine arched backward, head snapping back atop my neck as a spray of blood shot out of my forehead with such force that it spackled thickly on the ceiling, and then my head snapped forward and the incredible sensation devolved into mere, throbbing pain. My head reeled; a desperate grip on my staff was the only thing that kept me on my feet; vomit rose in my mouth but I pushed it back down, and then—

—I fell.

I fell into deep, dark black.

* * *

NOTES: 

_This update came late, short, and crappy for a variety of reasons, ones which aren't very good but are ones I think might be pertinent to… well, not _your_ lives, because I'm not nearly important enough for that, but they're big in my life so I just thought I'd share them._

_Reason One: Last week was finals. Now I'm on spring break. I was lead to believe that my spring break would consist of sleeping, eating, and playing video games, and I was all geared up to do that until my parents picked me up at the airport in full camping gear. "Surprise, Georgia!" they said between hugs and WTFs. "SURPRISE! WE'RE GOING CAMPING!" And that's what I've been doing since I got home. No computers, no internet, no phones—just me myself and the big bad wilderness, bereft of YYH and FT alike. SO SORRY!_

_Reason Two: I bought Pokémon, White Version, and it ROCKS. Seriously. Been naming my Pokémon after YYH characters._

_Reason Three: Epic fight with the Boyfriend over absolutely nothing. We don't fight often so it's really hard to handle when we do. _

_Reason Four: NANA'S LIVER TESTS CAME BACK CLEAN! She's got a wonderful bill of health and it's AWESOME! =D_

_Reason Five: Been working on my novel. ^^ It's coming along swimmingly. _

_Things I Promise For Next Chapter: Ren, Hiei moments, Dani's longkept secrets, more on America, Ren's notebook, and Future Koenma. Oh, and did I mention Hiei moments? Also, HIEI MOMENTS! I had thought I was overdoing them but people are asking so… they'll be making a comeback very soon. ^^_

_And, of course, to my lovely readers without whom I would die and agonizing death of despair and horrible loneliness: Colbub, lilmickey2008, spiritfoxxx821, Seleia, Kai-Chan94, Supreme Baka, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, etowa-ru, HeeHeeHee01, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, darkravensnight, hieisdarkdragonchick, Koryu Elric, Kaiya's Watergarden, xXxfiction, Takara Rose Oizumi, OhhTaylorJade, chocolateluvr13, Gorky, Doily Rox, Snubbed, Dreamehz, TallyYoungBlood, moani-sama, Katt Jeane, j.d.y., Tsu Aurora, Angel of Randomosity, The Tokyo Time Killer, ephemeral violet, AmoreVampiresv-v, AkaMizu-chan, S, Yoko Kiara14, Bi Gay Straight Who Cares, MikaUchiha666, Foxgirl Ray,itsallaboutbob, Cheshire Blue Kitten, Procrastination Possum, Snowgirl7589, Reiko Tsuchikake!_

_**To "HanSulli": I saw your picture of Dani on deviantART! It said your account was deactivated so I don't really know how else to contact you, but I just wanted you to know that I saw your picture and loved it! Thanks so much for drawing it! You rock!**_

_**EDIT: **_

My boyfriend just dropped a let's-get-over-our-fight-with-a-gift-type-of-bomb on me—apparently this weekend in Houston, Texas, there is an anime convention that's kind of a big deal, and he's taking me to it on Saturday (March 19th)! I won't be cosplaying as anything, but I'll try to take a bunch of pictures for you guys—maybe of YYH cosplayers, if I can find any? Lol! Real life Hieis and Kuramas FOR THE WIN! Anyway, it'll be a fun outing if anything. GRAPHOSPASM, OUT! (*swirls cape of insidious doom and disappears*)


	62. Chapter 62: Something There

Be sure to READ MY AUTHOR'S NOTE at the end of this chapter! It's EXTREMELY IMPORTANT!

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 62:

"Something There"

* * *

Tumbling and screaming without making a sound, I vaulted head over heart until the world spun around me like a top, and when I landed it wasn't because I'd hit anything—it was because I'd sunk into _something_, something viscous and warm and black that flowed deep into my lungs with every breath I took. It wasn't water and it wasn't air, it wasn't earth and it wasn't fire, it was something _else_, something _alive_, something _pure_ and _untouched_ and _present_…

I realized what it was in an electric instant, in the instant between falling and coming to rest and the instant when my whole body began to tingle with an overflow of my own energy. I was inside myself, I realized, cresting the tides of my body's natural ebb and flow of power as it surged against the inside of my skin. I drifted on its current, sightless but ears full of music I could never hope to replicate outside myself—it seemed to sing among the cosmic lights that I hadn't known dwelt within my soul, but were, I knew, present in every soul of every living thing—and as I took a deep breath of my energy I felt it suffuse my soul from head to toe, bathing me in sweet power and an exhilarating burst of—

It hurt, pain erupting across my skin, and then—

_I was smothering!_

The energy powered me for a mere second before flooding my body in a way I hated, loathed, despised because it sought to hurt me even as it sought to establish a mere communion. Everything around me, my power, it screamed and cried out and attacked, flooding into my mental mouth and nose until my pores leaked with it. I wasn't meant to touch my power like this directly, I didn't know why but I knew it was true, my soul was bare to its onslaught and its greedy fingers seeking to burn me and freeze me at once from the outside in. I struggled against it, trying to twist and swim away from myself, but this was me, me, and I couldn't get away—

I couldn't get away until, that is, a light knifed through the dark, and surrounded me with pale gold. It beat back my own power and left me gasping, and as I hunched in on myself I felt something warm connect with my shoulder in a very physical way. I flinched away from it, stifling a sob, and then the warmth began to speak with a voice I knew better than my own.

"When unconscious," Koenma said, "the barrier between your energy and your soul is relaxed."

I didn't say anything, eyes pressed so tight to my knees that I saw little lights flash behind my lids, all blues and greens and purples brighter than neon and more static that a bad TV.

The hand on my shoulder did not move despite my silence. Koenma said: "Consciousness protects us from our own raw power, filtering it so we can handle its purest force. Without conscious thought to guide us, we can burn ourselves even with the best intentions." His voice grew softer. "When Ren's lines of reality uncrossed themselves, they reopened the wound on your head."

I did look up at that. Koenma knelt at my side, lips curled in a gentle—in a gentle but _sad_ smile, one I could not comprehend.

"You mean, back at the temple…?" I said. I trailed off with a questioning look.

Koenma nodded, understanding my unspoken inquiry. "What you saw in the kitchen, with the wall going back in time… the same thing happened to your wound."

I held perfectly still as he reached out, fingertips brushing over my cheek before the curled my unbound hair behind my ear. His skin felt cool on mine, soothing and firm and soft, and his eyes lingered on my hairline like he could see beneath the skin.

"Ren's power," he said, "is anathema to yours."

"What do you mean?"

"She is logic and rationality. You are creative passion."

I _did_ flinch away from him at that, looking down at my legs so I didn't have to meet Koenma's eyes. I wasn't wearing clothes, though that hardly bothered me for whatever reason, and my leg… no, my _spirit_ possessed no deformity.

The pleasure I would normally have felt at that did not surface.

"The contact of such an energy forced you to flee inside yourself," Koenma went on. "You instinctively dove into the unconsciousness that accompanied your concussion to escape Ren's taint, though without the barrier of your conscious mind to protect you from yourself…"

He hesitated.

"I got swept up," I murmured, eyes locked on my whole toes. "It hurt."

"Yes."

Neither of us said anything, until I asked: "Why did you come to help me?"

It took him a few moments to answer. When he did, he spoke with his eyes closed; his lips barely moved with his words. "I came because you have questions," he said, whispered, echoed. With a grunt he stood up and moved away, red and blue robes trailing after him through the air. Brown eyes took in the gold-dark sphere around us, a network of flowing lines encasing us in a ball of protective light, but then his eyes narrowed as if the sight wasn't at all pleasing.

Me: "What is it?"

Koenma: "I fear the answers."

I took that in, letting his words float home and take root like airborne seeds. "You mean you're going to answer what I ask?" I said, voice rising. "You've never told me the truth, _ever_, so how can I believe you now?"

He didn't respond. I stood up, not mindful of my nakedness as I strode over on feet not crippled by cruel nature and happenstance. He refused to meet my eyes when I circled to stand in front of him, hands clenched by my thighs as I glared up into his impassive face.

"Are you going to tell me the truth, Koenma?" I asked him, staring without a single blink to break the moment apart. "Are you?"

Hair swept his jawbone, ragged tips needing a good trim. He swallowed, unsure of himself, and our eyes met. I tried to ignore the melancholy lying behind his brown-gold irises, focusing instead on his tight mouth and tense jaw.

"I'll tell you what you need to know," he said stiffly.

"And you won't lie when you do?"

"Yes."

"Will you hold things back?"

He swallowed.

I turned from him. "I suppose I shouldn't have expected more."

"I'm sorry, Dani. Some of it just isn't mine to tell."

That got my attention, made me grimace, and made me think of Ren all at once, because what he said smacked close to something Ren had said not too long before. What had she said about the five years missing from my memory? That she didn't want to hurt me by filling me in, that filling me in would make me want to kill—

"The parts you can't say," I asked, staring at my perfect feet, "are they the parts that my double lived, but I didn't?"

His answer affirmed what I had already come to know: "Yes."

"But why can't I know?" I asked. "I'm not the _other_ Dani. Those things didn't happen to _me_. How could they hurt _me_ when I'm not _her_?"

Though the question was posed more to myself than to Koenma, he still gave me an answer. "The 'might have been' is a powerful thing, Dani," he said. "It's not something to be looked at lightly."

I didn't like not knowing, but something inside me stirred. I wrapped my arms around myself with a shiver, thinking hard, and the conclusion I came to was a simple one.

"I won't," I said, "ask about the other Dani's past. It's not mine and it's gone, so I'll let sleeping dogs lie." I glanced over my shoulder; some of the clouds behind Koenma's eyes had cleared, though more than a few thunderheads remained and crackled with pent up secrets. "Other than that, though… can I expect honesty?"

Hair fell into his eyes when he nodded, and I couldn't help but smile.

"You really need a haircut," I said.

Koenma smiled back, though without much happiness. "I know," he said. "It's difficult to do by myself."

Pity surged. "I'm sorry," I said.

He said: "Don't be." An inclined head told me he didn't want to pursue that subject, as did his next words. "Ask your questions, Dani, while we still have time together."

It took a minute for me to gather my thoughts. The first thing I asked came quickly. "Am I really in my mother's body?"

The prince of the broken Spirit World inhaled deeply through his nose, eyes falling shut.

"Honesty," I reminded him. "Am I really _me_?"

An unsteady breath. "Your ability to harness music comes from your soul," he said, tone clipped. "Your soul is your own, and it more than anything defines who you are." His eyes opened, piercing me. "But your physical abilities, the ones that allow you to shift form at will… those belonged to a body warped by too much time in Demon World."

"And that body was my mother's," I said.

"Does it matter?" he asked. He cut me off when I tried to reply, saying: "Your mother was a shapeshifter, Dani—can you really say that her body was her own after Demon World had its way with it?" He shook his head slowly. "No. Labeling your shell with an identity separate from yourself is lunacy. It is yours now, and why should you try to tell yourself otherwise?"

My mouth worked. Eventually, I said: "I just want… to know if my mom…"

Brown eyes went soft, but they did not stand down. "Your mother's soul resides in heaven, now," Koenma said with all the gentleness of a saint. "What else is there to wonder?"

Despite how much I wanted a definitive answer—God knew I had been waiting for one for long enough—Koenma's words gave me an odd sort of peace. My throat went thick, eyes pricking with tears, but I pushed the emotional rush aside and scrubbed my hand over my face.

"You might ask another question," Koenma suggested.

I gave him a quick nod. "The last time we met, you told me I was anything but random."

He inhaled sharply. "I did," he said.

"I thought about it, and I… well, I figured that I wasn't random because of Ren," I said. Recognition sparked in Koenma's face, encouraging me. "Seishou wants the machine that destroyed America, and Ren is the key to getting it. So, that means that in the past that made the whole world end, Seishou probably got what he wanted—AKA, Ren." I took a deep breath. "Is all of that true?"

Koenma said: "Yes."

I swallowed down the agony of that admission; my next words became hard to say.

"Which means," I said thickly, "that Ren was a bad guy in the past?"

And Koenma told me: "Yes, she was."

We stared at one another, me feeling all sorts of dread and Koenma… I don't know what he was feeling. His face remained aloof. Eventually the news of Ren's past villainy sank in, prompting me to sigh: "Good. It took me forever to work that out."

"I'm impressed."

"Thanks." Another deep breath. "But I'm confused on one point."

"Name it."

"If the world was ended by the Beasts, what I don't get is what Seishou and Ren were after in the past."

Koenma had gone very, very still.

"It can't have been the machine, since that didn't end the world," I reasoned, staring at Koenma's tensed shoulders. "Seishou is after the machine in this timeline, and Ren is on our side, but in the past they had to be after the Book. Only, what did Ren and Seishou _both_ want from the Book? If they were working together it means they had the same goals, but I can't figure out what Ren could ever—"

Koenma turned on his heel and took a step away, letting out a low curse.

"What's wrong?" I asked, making to go after him, but before I could take two steps he had turned back and come at me, grabbing me by the shoulders so he could keep me at arm's length. His hands were gentle, but his words were anything but.

"The truth of that," he said, "ties in with your other question."

"What other question?"

"The one that makes you anything but random, Dani," Koenma said. His thumb traced a circle on my skin; his voice traced a chill up my spine.

"I-I just figured that that had to do with waking up Ren," I stammered. "With, you know, 'Time After Time'! Without it, we couldn't have gotten Ren before Seishou ever grabbed—"

"It's more than that," Koenma said. "Much more."

The air between us crackled with tension. "Tell me," I demanded, grabbing his wrists and squeezing. "Tell me!"

"You won't like it." He looked away. "And I can't tell you more than half the truth. If you can manage to complete your mission without that knowledge…"

"Screw that, Koenma!" I snapped. His eyes widened in shock. "You have no idea what I might need to know, so holding back won't help anything! Just spit it out, OK? What if not knowing ends up making me miss something important, something that could—"

"Dani, stop it!" he said. His hands went rough on my collarbone, digging firmly into my skin. "I'm not keeping anything from you that we haven't already cleared!"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that the truth of Ren and Seishou lies in your missing memory," he said, voice dropping into a growl. When my mouth fell open in surprise he added: "You are not random, Dani, and you're right—it was your friendship with Ren that made me choose you, and it was your inclusion in the cryogenic chambers that made me choose you, but the biggest reason of all is one you have not guessed. It's a reason you haven't even alluded to, or suspected, because it is so painfully obvious that you refuse to see it!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I snapped, shrugging Koenma's hands aside, but he recaptured his grip and didn't allow me any space.

"It means your friendship with Ren is the key to _everything_!" he said. "_Everything_, _all_ of it, and not just when you sang 'Time After Time'! The Book can do anything, grant any wish, and Ren's wish in a world without her best friend, her one and only Dani, her soulmate—"

"I don't understa—" I tried to say, but the words stopped and stuck and imploded, making me gasp and then reel, and I was suddenly glad for Koenma's grip on my arm because the awful truth was not something I could take without first sitting down.

"Now you've begun to get it," he said. An arm snaked around my waist; the other cupped my head and pressed me to his chest, which I gladly clung to. "Now you've begun to see."

"But why?" I murmured, inhaling him as a measure of comfort. "Why would Ren risk—"

"Is it really so hard to understand?" Koenma said gently, and he pushed me away to look into my eyes.

"Ren _loves_ you," he said. "Ren summoned the Beasts to bring _you_ back to life. She destroyed the world, for _you_."

* * *

Have you ever had the breath knocked out of you? I have. I fell out of a tree when I was little and landed on my back; breathing was like trying to stuff knives into a tiny box, and each scrape of air hurt more than it healed. But can you image that the knife is a machete and the box is made of tissue, so every breath is more than a stab, it's a rip and a tear and a gouge and a deathblow with every gasping, agonized plea for oxygen?

Hearing that you were the cause for the end of the world feels a little like that.

Only, you know… worse.

* * *

Koenma must have thought that earth shattering news was best taken like a band-aid: ripped off quickly, to get it over and done with in a few instants. He kept talking as if speed could make up for the pain, and he didn't slow down until he was done.

"We didn't know what they wanted with the Book until it was too late," he said, holding me to keep me from falling apart, because I wanted to do that and never come back together again. "Seishou woke Ren with a song up before we even knew she existed, and when she discovered you were gone they went after the Book with everything they had, fighting us to get it with tooth and nail and the Sisters as Ren's personal army—"

_We serve the Bright Lady to the death,_ the Grand Mother had said.

"—and then… and then they got it." His arms tightened around my shoulders. "We were overrun. Before we knew what was happening, Seishou had an army of demon amazons at his disposal. We underestimated him, we did not count on Ren's presence, and then they had the Book and gave themselves to it."

"Botan saw it all and managed to get away," he said, stroking my hair (I was too afraid to move, or speak, or barely even think). "She told me that the blonde woman, that Ren asked for someone named Dani to be brought to life, and that Seishou backed her and that both gave themselves to the Book, and that the Beasts possessed them and began to wreak havoc on—"

Explosions rocked me from the inside, and I shoved Koenma away. He grabbed at me, stunned, but I stumbled back and pointed at him, arm trembling and mouth tasting of copper and blood and salt.

"Seishou wanted me to come back to life?" I asked, voice shaking. Louder, I asked: "_Seishou_ wanted to bring _me_ back to _life_? _Seishou_?"

Koenma gaped, then paled. Sweat broke out along his brow, trickling down his face to darken his red scarf like drops of colorless blood.

"And, and you said that _Seishou_ woke Ren up with a _song_?" I said. My voice barked out in bursts, hysterical and rising and getting louder and rising and— "A _song_, Koenma? A song? He woke Ren up with a _song_? He brought _me_ back to life? Seishou woke Ren up with a _song_ and brought _me_ back to life?"

"Dani—" he said, but placating me couldn't happen, it _couldn't_, it _couldn't_, so I shoved him back and lashed out at his chest and let loose a scream to wake the dead.

"He knew 'Time After Time', Koenma?" I screeched. "He knew TIME AFTER FREAKING TIME? HOW THE HELL DID A MONSTER KNOW 'TIME AFTER TIME'!"

"Dani, I—"

"TELL ME WHO SEISHOU IS, KOENMA!" I screamed, beating my fists on his chest with hollow thumps. He tried to grab my hands but I wriggled free, striking out again and again until he resigned himself to simply taking my feeble but fierce punches as they came. "TELL ME WHY HE WANTED ME TO BE ALIVE! TELL ME HOW HE KNEW ME AND REN'S SONG!"

"I can't, Dani!" he cried, trying to calm me down with calming touches and pretty words, but I wouldn't have any of it and turned to run, sprinting toward the perimeter of Koenma's golden cage. It resisted my efforts for a moment, stretching like elastic until I could feel it begin to pop, until I could feel the killing comfort of my raw power waiting on the other side—

"Stop, Dani, NO!" he shouted, and I spun in time to see his hand dip into his robe and pull out something red, something small and red and—

I couldn't see it, though: I couldn't see it no matter how hard I tried because the tears were coming much too hard. I hadn't felt them appear but when I noticed them, noticed my wild sobbing and heaving chest, I collapsed onto the floor and wailed, and then Koenma stuffed the thing back into his pocket and ran to me. I threw myself at him, beating on his chest with my fists even as much as I tried to pull him closer. He began to stroke my hair with shaking hands.

"It's all my fault!" I gritted out between gut-wrenching heaves of air and tears. "Fuck, FUCK, it's all my FAULT!"

"Dani, _none of it_ is your fault," he soothed, murmuring nothings in my ear. "It's fine, it's not your fault, it's—"

"She killed your world for _me_!"

"You didn't ask her to."

"But she did it anyway!"

"Dani, hush!" he ordered, pushing me away so he could look directly at me. "The past is the past—you said it yourself! You are here to fix what went wrong, and you've already done that by simply being _alive_!"

I froze, throat and eyes ablaze, though the fire in them didn't match the fire Koenma's entire body shot straight into me. Looking at him was like drinking in strength through the eyes—his conviction, his essence, his drive, it made me feel like—

"Ren summoned the Beasts because you were _dead_, Dani," he said, voice so intense I thought it might set me on fire. He tucked my hair behind my ears, sad and jubilant and comforting at once. "But now that you're alive she has no _reason_ to use the Beasts. Your presence alone caused drastic changes to this timeline, rendering Ren's threat almost nonexistent."

"But, but in the past—" I gasped. "Why didn't you just bring the _other me_ back to life? Why did you pull _me_ out of _my world_? Why did it have to be _me_—?"

"It couldn't have been the Dani from this world," he said slowly, carefully, as if trying not to give it all away. "It had to be _you_, from another place entirely."

"But why? _Why_?"

"I can't tell you, Dani," Koenma said. He cupped my face in his hands, smiling, but his voice did not lose its firmness or strength. "Your missing years would bring you too much pain to hear, and now they hardly even matter."

"How? Why?"

Patiently, he said: "Because the world has changed so much that those years no longer hold any weight, especially to someone from another world." When I said nothing, he told me this: "_You_ woke Ren up, Dani—not Seishou. That alone should prove how much things have changed."

I couldn't speak.

"I chose you because the sheer fact of your existence is enough to change the balance of this world," he said softly. "You have the power to change tides, because your absence was what let them run wild without check."

"But—" I said. Koenma stopped me.

"But nothing," he countered, and he shook his head to emphasize his point. "Ren is the most important figure in all of this. She holds the key to the world's destruction in both the past and in the present, but you…"

We stared at one another, both lost for words. His narrow chin, his almond eyes, his high cheekbones, his pale forehead, all of it had sincerity etched into their foundations, like he had been chipped from a block of strength turned to stone.

"If Ren is the key," he said, "then you are the only one who can wield it."

"And can I wield Seishou, too?"

The words had slipped out without my check, and for a moment Koenma acted as though he were in the dark. His eyes unfocused, refocused, gazed into nothing, and then locked on my face with pain ground deep into his pupils.

"That is not my place to say," he said, and I began to ask him what he meant when the world around us _rippled_. A sensation raced up my backbone, making me arch and gasp because it _burned_ with little licks of red-hot flame, and then the dark outside Koenma's golden cage began to glow like black metal heated in a forge.

Koenma's head jerked back as he looked at the sphere, which had begun to flicker and pulse as if warding something off. The prince hauled me to my feet, pushing me behind him as one of his hands disappeared into his pocket.

"What's happing?" I asked, panic bubbling up. "Is it the Beasts?"

"No," Koenma said, and he turned to me so he could grasp my shoulders before cupping my face in both hands. "Dani, listen to me. Be wary of Seishou. Keep Ren away from him. Though I hope it does not come to this, exposing her to him could spell disaster."

"How?"

"There isn't time to explain," Koenma snapped, and a horrible noise of crying universes made us both cry out in pain. The golden sphere broke open and shattered, darkness rushing in before pure mauve heat darted in front of it, weaving a sphere of its own in place of the vanished gold. I fell to my knees and covered my eyes in my hands, blinded by the dark-light new sphere and the fading shreds of the gold—

"Why," Hiei spat, "are _you_ here?"

* * *

_NOTES:_

_Firstly, sorry for the short chapter again. It's just that I wrote out 10,000 words and realized that the last 5,000 of them were UTTER CRAP. I can't post them; they're just too awful. So, I'm redoing them and will have them out next week, a full chapter that actually is worth something. Sorry for the weirdness these past two weeks—school has started back up and I'm having to deal with it._

* * *

_NOTES (PLEASE READ! THIS NOTE IS A MILLION TIMES MORE IMPORTANT THAN NORMAL!):_

_A devART and FFnet buddy, Moltenchier, pointed me in the direction of a cause worth mentioning. If you have a facebook, follow the link on my profile to help out the family of one of Moltenchier's close friends. If you're not facebook savvy (like me!) here is the information you need to know._

The Twombly family from Hampden is applying for an Extreme Makeover, Home Edition. The Twombly's have two young boys who are in Kindergarten and 2nd grade at McGraw School. They have a rare genetic condition called A.S.L.D. and are two of 62 cases known worldwide with this condition. The boys have visual impairment, cannot speak, and have severe physical disabilities. They also are wonderful boys whose smiles light up a room and who touch the hearts of all who come in contact with them.

The family is hard working and humble. The parents and two older sisters, Kassidy and Haley care for the boys around the clock. The mom, Lisa never asks for help and works from home while having to care for the boys, transport the boys to and from school and to numerous doctor's appointments. She uses her skills as a seamstress to help with school projects on top of all of her other responsibilities. Their father, Daniel, works as an iron worker. He too attends numerous doctors' appointments. Both parents also work hard to support their older girls' activities at school. The older sisters are loving and supportive.

The boys and their family would benefit from a new house because of their need for a more handicap accessible home.

We need EVERYONE's help with contacting extreme makeover and asking them to choose the Twombly family. Please send this information to everyone you know and ask them to start writing and emailing to the information below. We want to continuously flood Extreme Makeover with letters and emails beginning NOW. Once you begin emailing and writing please continue for at least one (1) month.

Let's show Extreme Makeover how "it takes a village" and that Hampden supports the Twomblys.

email: _castingbangor (at) gmail (.) com_

__In the title line, put: "PICK THE TWOMBLYS".

The deadline for emailing is April 1st, so _don't email after that date! Until then, though, let the love and emails flow!_

_As always, many thanks to my readers, without whom I'd be pretty damn lost if I were to tell the honest truth. __**Undercoverprep, OhhTaylorJade, Naitza-Kururugi, etowa-ru, unknown player, Reiko Tsuchikake, Yoko Kiara14, hieisdarkdragonchick, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Kai-Chan94, Snowgirl7589, Supreme Baka, darkravensnight, TallyYoungBlood, Zetsubel, Kaiya's Watergarden, Kajihenge Yoko, chocolateluvr13, ephemeral violet, Procrastination Possum, Cheshire Blue Kitten, Doily Rox, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Koryu Elric, XxX, , moani-san, colbub, Takara Rose Oizumi, itsallaboutbob, DaAmazingMeepers, Angel of Randomosity, Jettie, HeeHeeHee01, j.d.y., AkaMizu-chan, rain chant, MusicFiend666, nani san!**_


	63. Chapter 63: Cowgirls Don't Cry

Future Talk

Chapter 63:

"Cowgirls Don't Cry"

* * *

It was like something out of a cowboy movie, seeing the two men who basically had my heart tied in knots staring one another down with narrowed eyes and squared shoulders: they were, in that moment, two rogue gunslingers facing off, hands ready to grab at the revolvers on their hips so they could try and outclass their rival, looking like they both wanted to rip the other to shreds—

Well, correction: Hiei obviously wanted to rip _Koenma_ to shreds, hands fisted at his sides and teeth grit as if he wanted to lash out and bite the prince with the incisors gleaming on full display, but Koenma just looked like he was going to be ill, pale-faced and grim lipped as he stared down someone I had tentatively begun to think of as my boyfriend, and _what if Hiei attacked, could Koenma defend himself, would he_—

My throat felt thick all of a sudden. _Cowgirls don't cry,_ I told myself as I stared between my opposed rogues_. This might be my worst nightmare come to pass, but… cowgirls don't cry. _

My breathing couldn't help but hitch.

_Not… not unless they kill each other,_ I thought, feeling panic begin to set in as my palms went slick with sweat._ I don't think I'd be able to keep from crying, then._

Hiei spoke first, of course—he looked at me, standing behind Koenma as I was, with eyes aflame… but the flames weren't meant for me, and I could take them without flinching.

"Are you hurt?" he asked, sweeping my body over.

Mute, I could only shake my head.

Hiei made a small noise of recognition in his throat, gave my body one more once-over, and turned his face to Koenma again. Any and all softness evaporated from the planes of his face

"Why are _you_ here?" he said, tone totally void of inflection—though his eyes still spoke of fury. "We agreed that _I_ was going to bring her back."

Koenma's eyebrow twitched. He said nothing.

Hiei glanced over Koenma with more scrutiny, then, and his eyes widened just a fraction, irises surrounded by stark white on all sides. He very quickly looked back at me; with a pang of intense embarrassment I remembered that my soul wasn't wearing any clothing. I clutched at myself for modesty's sake, wondering with a jolt just what Hiei might be thinking—did he assume, given my state of undress, that Koenma and I were—

_Oh no,_ I thought, panic rising even stronger. My breath came faster, sharper, hurtfully. _Oh no, please Hiei, don't think we were—_

Hiei had been studying Koenma all during my mental rat-race, thinking hard; Koenma had nothing to say about the thunder building in Hiei's look, nor did he offer any explanations.

Eventually Hiei seemed to come to a conclusion. "Unless," he said suddenly, "you're not _Koenma_ at all." Those eyes of his narrowed into cherry crescents of malice; his next words rocked me to the core. "Preying on her _again_, Beast? I thought I'd made it clear she was off limits."

The words stilled me. I stared at Hiei. Then I stared at Koenma in confusion.

_Wait… Beast?_

A flash of _something_ passed over Koenma's face, then, and his expression morphed into one of cunning. He grinned at Hiei before pivoting on his heel, showing the fire apparition his back.

And then the prince of Spirit World… winked at me?

"She's all yours, demon," he said loftily. Tipping me another wink, this one a bit sadder than the first, he raised a hand and the air before him began to shimmer a pale green.

But Hiei wasn't having any of that, not at _all_, because he lifted his own hand and it had begun to glow black and violet and red all at once, pulsating with darklight so intense it made my soul's eyes sting.

"I don't think so, Beast," Hiei growled, his ferocity as palpable as the heat of the power rolling off of him in waves that made my hair blow back and eyes go dry. "I'm not letting you run again, not when _she's_ at stake."

Koenma spun around when he felt the Dragon rise. The green light in front of him dissolved and disappeared in the wake of Hiei's energy; the red-violet-black glowed even more strongly, forcing me to shield my eyes because it was just so _bright_—and then something blossomed around Hiei's arm, a head and scales and crimson eyes and a roaring throat—

Then, however, I looked away from him for a moment, because the red-dark cage around us had _shuddered _when a pale pink light flashed outside it, and I knew exactly what it was without knowing _how_ because just then I felt Sweet for the first time, calling out and fighting desperately to let her voice be heard.

_I'm here!_ I called to her, silent but screaming all at once over the Dragon's roar. _I'm here, Sweet! Where are you?_

Her voice seemed to be coming from millions of miles away, as wavy and indistinct as if it were coming from underwater—she seemed to be calling longingly for something, but what could she be—

She vanished as quickly as she'd come, unable to navigate the miasma of my unfiltered soul.

Koenma was still turned and facing Hiei, oblivious of Sweet's attempts to reach me and of my own inability to be heard by her. He had lifted his hands as if to ward Hiei off, but nothing could have stopped the heat pouring out of Hiei's arm at that point—

I froze solid despite the heat.

Nothing, perhaps, except…

_Me?_

I shot forward before I knew what was happening, moving with all the unconscious desperation I could muster as I went to Hiei with my hands outstretched. He looked at my foot—whole and healthy in this dream world—with momentary shock before grasping my upper arms, forcing himself to dispel the Dragon's power so he wouldn't hurt me with his touch. Heat of a more nurturing kind suffused my palms when I laid them flat atop his pectoral muscles.

"He's not a Beast, Hiei!" I said, staring into his incredulous face. I willed him to believe me with everything I had, hoping beyond all hope that I could prevent the disaster I could see coming all too clearly. "Don't hurt him, _please_!"

"Dani is right, Hiei," Koenma patronizingly tried to reason with the irate fire apparition. "Unleashing the Dragon inside of Dani's very soul would likely kill her." He tossed his head, teeth on display just the way a Beast's would, only Koenma lacked the telltale spark of madness I had come to expect to see in the dark devil's eye. "Your pathetic shield can't contain it. It will rip her apart. Such a shame."

Hiei looked away from me long enough to growl at Koenma with bared teeth.

"Think logically, Hiei," Koenma added, mockingly. "Hurt _me_, not Dani. She's innocent in this."

"Actually, let's keep the hurting of _all_ parties to a minimum, OK?" I said, fists clenching on Hiei's chest.

Hiei didn't like that idea in the slightest. "You're standing up for that Beast?" he growled, and before I could answer he had twisted, releasing my arms so he could stand in front of me and hold out his fist to keep me away from Koenma. "What has it been saying to trick you into defending it, Dani?"

"Nothing! He's not a Beast, Hiei!" I protested, grabbing onto his arm.

"Of course it is!"

"No, _he's_ not!"

"Then what is that thing, Dani?" my fire demon snarled, glaring at me over one brown shoulder. "It's not the Koenma we know, and yet it wears his face!" His arm pulsed, flashing with dark fire as he summoned the Dragon to the ready one again. "He is an _enemy_, not Koenma!"

"You're wrong—this is Koenma!" Frustrated anger boiled over when Hiei still didn't believe me, making my vision tunnel. "T_his_ Koenma is from the _future_!" I snapped. "He's still Koenma but he's a little different and he's trying to stop the Beasts from destroying the world again, OK?"

I very promptly went rigid; my eyes jumped to the prince of the Spirit World, still standing on Hiei's other side. Koenma's mouth parted in disbelief, eyes wide and boring into mine like astonished drills.

_Oh,_ I thought, mouth dry. _Oh. Oh SHIT._

* * *

To say that Hiei's face darkened would be an understatement of epic proportions—he looked like darkness incarnate, eyes going crimson instead of cherry when he slowly turned to face me and breathed out the words: "He's _what_?"

I didn't know what to do just then, and floundered. Hiei cupped my face in his hands and leaned in, coming so close to me I thought he might kiss me or something, but all he did was breathe against my mouth and whisper, deadly soft and papery dry, below the crowning glory of his eyes, eyes so unreadable and alien I thought they would pull from me every last drop of my humanity and—

"What," he said, lips brushing against mine with every calculated syllable, "did you just _say_?"

I started to speak to him, to tell everything to those hypnotic eyes and his deep, rumbling command of a voice, but the hardness in his gaze overrode the softness of his mouth and I wrenched my face out of his hands, stumbling back to catch myself on my normal feet.

_Keep your head, Dani!_ I screamed at myself, chest heaving from indecision and adrenaline and OH MY GOD WHAT DO I DO?_ He's trying to, to _seduce_ you or something! Don't fall for it, don't let him get near, _think_ about what you have to do and—_

Hiei didn't allow me time to think, however—he came after me and pulled me flush against him, crushing a hand into my hair to keep me still as an arm latched around my waist and held on tight. He tilted my face up, harsh and demanding and unmovable despite how much I struggled, pushing against him as I tried to get away and he dipped his face toward mine as is he could draw out my secrets with his lips—

"Hiei, stop it!" I yelled, but he didn't stop, he just kept repeating his question at such a maddening distance that I wanted to kiss him more than anything, to just give in and melt and the _heat_, oh my _god, _a magnetic pull radiated off of him that made it all but impossible to keep standing on my own, knees going to jelly and fire rushing through my veins in sweet waves—

"Let her go!" I heard Koenma demand, a demand that shattered my sex drive into jagged bits because why was Hiei doing this to me with someone _watching_? This was _wrong_!, but when footsteps came our way Hiei's power flared, pushing the prince back with a sharp bellow of energy and force.

Unperturbed and without breaking his hypnotist's stare, Hiei kept going. "What did you say it was?" he said, breath misting into my mouth. "_What_ did you say it was?"

Koenma tried to come at us again. Hiei repelled him with hardly a ripple.

I caved eventually, torn between being on fire from Hiei's touch and on wanting to get away—and with Koenma watching, wanting to get away won out. The words bubbled up like magma and ash, scalding my lips and throat with the unbridled truth as crazy as it sounded:

"I said that this Koenma is from the future!" I gasped, eyes squeezed shut because looking at Hiei made thinking impossible. "The Book killed everyone there! We're trying, we're trying to keep it from happening _again_!"

"Are you now?" Hiei practically purred.

"He took me when I died and gave me this body," I said, gasped, moaned. "It's, it's not _mine_! I'm from another world, another time, I'm not Ren's Dani, I'm _another_ Dani from _another_ place-time, and I'm changing the past so the future can have a chance to—"

"Enough."

Disorientation made being spun around all but sickening. Hiei cradled my back against his chest and spun, too, so we were facing Koenma with Hiei's arms around my chest to keep me pinned tight to his body. Koenma met my eyes, horror plastered all over his face, and the reality of what I'd told Hiei sank in like an iron anchor.

_Oh no,_ I thought, head clearer now that Hiei's maddening eyes weren't pulling out my secrets. _Oh… oh NO_.

_Oh yes,_ Koenma's grim mouth seemed to wish to say. _Oh yes, indeed. _

_You've just damned us all_.

* * *

And now, a related anecdote you might find applicable:

I think one of the most embarrassing incidents I've ever witnessed happened to a girl I was in a musical with.

I didn't have a role in the musical, of course—I can't handle the dance numbers and most staging for obvious reasons; plus, I'm a horrible actress and I am well aware of this fact, thanks so much—but I played piano in the band and worked on costumes since I'm good with my hands.

I also had the job of passing out microphone headsets to some of the cast members, and that's where the embarrassing incident comes into play.

A younger girl with a minor role, a total upstart of an actress who wasn't even that good but thought she was the world's next Ingrid Bergman, had to wear a mic for one scene and was not, apparently, very good about remembering to switch it off when she got offstage. She wound up going into a dressing room with it on and sitting down to gossip with a friend of hers, and she spent a good ten minutes making really _mean_ fun of the director's daughter, who just so happened to have the lead role.

Luckily this happened after hours, so the only people to hear this were myself, a few others on the technical crew… and the director himself, of course. We sat in shocked silence in the prop room as the gossip spewed over the loudspeakers backstage, and when someone tried to leave the room to go tell the girls to SHUT UP!, the director just told them to sit down until the broadcasted conversation came to a halt.

He acted very coolly, to his credit. He picked up a spare mic and, since all the mics were connected by earpieces that broadcasted all that was said to the wearer, he just said into the mouthpiece the words: "Be careful of your mic-pac, (insert the girl's name here)."

She later apologized with more than a few tears and pleas for forgiveness, but it did her little good. She never got another role with that director, which I thought served her right but hey, c'mon, who was I to judge?

After all, I was pretty much in her exact position when I told Hiei the truth about Future Koenma, who was surely going to be leery of trusting me with information ever again.

* * *

Koenma stared at me, locked as I was in Hiei's arms.

I stared at Koenma, locked as he was in disbelief.

Hiei, behind me and unseeable, tightened his grip on my body, hugging me close in arms that burned.

_Oh no, _came my first coherent thought in minutes_. Oh no. He _knows_, I said _everything_, how can I salvage this—_

Hiei growled lowly, the rumble vibrating in my back as it made his chest shake. His teeth ground together audibly before he snarled: "You think I hadn't heard all that before?"

My thoughts stopped cold.

… _huh?_

"Your technique is sloppy, Beast," Hiei sneered. "Her memories told me of the lies you've fed her. This is nothing I haven't heard before."

And here was absolutely nothing I could say to that. All rational thought had fled in the wake of Hiei's words. Can you really blame me?

"I know your game," Hiei was saying. "You played it with me, you played it with everyone at the temple, and you played it with Dani, too—you pick the scared and confused and trick them with pretty words and hollow promises, telling them they're special and trying to get them on your side, but I have news for you—"

_Wait, WHAT?_

"—you need a new ploy," Hiei sneered. "It's not going to work anymore." His right arm flared an even brighter black despite being pressed against my skin, but the Dragon's fire didn't burn—it just buzzed, hot but not unheard of, making Koenma flicker like a ghost through the mirage.

Hiei said: "I'd no sooner slit my own throat than let you fuck over _Dani_!"

"You… already knew?" I said, stunned. I shook myself to clear the cobwebs. "Wait, you already _knew_?"

"How could I not?" asked Hiei, lips brushing up against my ear, and with a shudder born of both fear and the sensuality of the gesture I wriggled free, stumbling behind Hiei so I could see Koenma over his shoulder. Hiei followed me, gauging my reaction through a hooded gaze.

Koenma's eyes had gone wide, then narrow, while Hiei was busy looking at me. To my horror, he smiled a little before adopting his best impersonation of a Beast-tone-of-doom-and-superiority to say: "Perceptive of you, Hiei."

Hiei turned, seething but contained. "Not hard to figure out when you've been playing the same game with _all of us_," Hiei said. He tossed his head and laughed. "Telling me you'd give me Dani if I killed Koenma—cheh!"

I went still.

_Wait… WHAT?_

Koenma, if Hiei's words surprised him, too, didn't show any sort of reaction on his face. He just stared at Hiei with a smirk frozen in place, but Hiei wasn't done speaking.

"And it was _you_ I saw with her in Demon World, wasn't it?" Hiei said. "I don't know how you managed to follow her there, but I knew it was a trick when I saw you two together. The _real_ Koenma has no interest in her. You couldn't fool _me_, Beast."

"Oh my god," I breathed. "Oh my GOD, you SAW THAT?"

Hiei glared. "What, saw you kiss that Beast who's playing with your heart even now?"

I gaped at him.

"Yes, I saw," he said, snarled, snapped. "What of it?"

"It's just, you never said—"

"A kiss was nothing. It showed me worse before that," Hiei said. My stomach clenched in sickened curiosity. "Toying with me, telling me you were Koenma's plaything in more ways than one, and that killing him meant freeing you. But I knew better. I recognized it for the trick it was..." He grimaced. "Unlike _you_."

While I tried to process the fact that the Beasts had, apparently, been preying on Hiei's fondness for me the same way it had preyed on the love of my friends and parents, that Hiei had interpreted all of my past liaisons with Koenma as tricks of the Beasts, and that Hiei had considered killing _Koenma_ of all people—well, I was trying to let it all sink in when Hiei snaked an arm around my shoulders and pulled me to his side, glaring at Koenma with unadulterated malice.

"You've been lying to Dani since she came to the temple," Hiei said. "The memories she lost from being in the chrysalises, you told her those were to keep us from knowing about _you_, about how you brought her here from another world, but we know the truth now and your trickery—"

But Hiei had it all wrong, and I couldn't stand that. "But he's not tricking me!" I protested, ducking out from under Hiei's arm. "He's never even tried!" I tried standing between Hiei and Koenma, but Hiei moved to stand in the middle, as unmovable as a wall as I said: "Koenma's been telling me the truth, he pulled me from another world and put me in this one, where my double—"

"That's lunacy!" Hiei gritted out. Fists clenched at his sides. "There is no other world, no other reality, you're Dani, the same Dani in the chrysalises, the same—"

"No, Hiei, I'm not!" I said over him. "I'm—"

"The game is over, Dani," Koenma said, and he winked when Hiei's back was turned—he was trying to trick Hiei into believing that his misconceptions were right, leaving me to look like the deceived fool, and my jaw dropped at this betrayal. "I tricked you, but now you know it was all lies. Listen to Hiei like a good little girl."

"No!" I shouted, latching on to Hiei's arm so he could look only at me. I put all my honesty and earnestness, hopes and pleas, into the words: "This is the future Koenma! He's the only survivor of the Beast's attack, and he needed me to—"

"That's enough, Dani," Hiei snapped.

"Not, it's not enough, because he's lying to us both!" I yelled. "Koenma, tell him the _truth_!"

But Koenma only shrugged. "Hiei figure me out, Dani. I've been tricking you all along."

Rage—white, pure, and scalding—made me see red. In an instant I forgot keeping secrets, I forgot playing mum, I forgot about saving the world: I was high on betrayal.

"No you haven't and you know it!" I screeched, pushing past Hiei so I could run at Koenma. We collided and I shoved him, anger giving me more strength than I'd ever had. "Hiei knows everything! This makes our job so much easier! Why don't you just let him in and—"

I felt Hiei behind me before we touched, his arms encircling my waist so he could bodily carry me, kicking and shouting all the while, away from Koenma as the prince gave me a small, sad, but firm smile.

"I'll be leaving now," Koenma said, still doing his best impression of the Beast's patronizing speech, and once again he reached into his pocket and pulled something out of it, a small red _something_ I could hardly see for all my struggles against Hiei, and then Koenma lifted his hands and summoned that strange green mist to shade the air in front of him. It coated his body from head to toe and then _dissolved_ him, pushing his atoms apart until he was no more than a mist himself, darker colors interspersed among the green like specks of sand in flour.

"Take care, both of you," Koenma's voice came faintly, and then the mist fell away like so much scattered dust.

I stopped struggling when that happened; Hiei let me go as soon as Koenma disappeared, conscious that the threat had vanished. I stared at the place where Koenma had been as I calmed down my racing heart, but when all my brain could come up with was a vague sense of "WTF" I shook myself, turned to Hiei, and prepared to give him the biggest talking-to of his life.

What I got, however, was not what I had planned.

The look in Hiei's eyes reminded me of a rattlesnake poised to strike. Even though he didn't have a tail to shake, I still felt alarm bells go off at the sight of Hiei's face, a face which had contorted into a mask of fury mixed with—

Was that _humor?_

"Hiei," I said, finally loosening my tongue long enough to say his name and to try to prepare myself to chew him out, but before any other words could be born he had stepped close to me, my toes brushing the tips of his boots and my breasts brushing his shirt each time I drew in a breath.

That reminded me of how naked I was. I stepped back, conscious of Hiei's face being so close to mine and how his eyes were trying to drill holes in my retinas, but he matched me step for step, stare for stare until, finally, he reached around and pressed his hand against the small of my back. In a second I had been tipped forward, caught off guard, and when I fell forward and found myself pressed totally against him, mouth coming dangerously close to crashing into his… he let out a laugh that made my toes curl. I could feel his breath on my lips.

Then Hiei said in a voice like velvet, each syllable promising a brush of skin on skin: "You're inside your unconscious. Were you aware?"

I tried to pull back a little, got about an inch of freedom, and managed to say: "Koenma told me."

Hiei dipped closer, reclaiming the distance. "You mean, the Beast told you."

I pulled back again. "I mean, _Koenma_ told me."

"You're still clinging to those lies?" Hiei asked silkily.

"Yes," I said.

"You're delusional."

"I am _not_," I snapped.

Hiei laughed. "Don't worry. You'll see the truth soon."

His words were light, filled with a casual promise and not much else besides, and that's when something strange struck me: Where was Hiei's temper, as infamous as it was, because hadn't our previous conversation been something to get mad over? Hadn't we just talked about me kissing another man and about the Beasts tricking me into believing a(n alleged) array of lies? Didn't I seem like a fool for believing those lies?

Wasn't that a big _deal_?

"Hey, why aren't you angry at me?" I said, voice hoarse. I searched Hiei's face for an answer. "This seems… major."

His mouth curled into a smirk.

"… and why the heck are you smiling?"

Hiei's eyes traveled to my lips and stayed there.

I swallowed, unnerved. "A verbal answer would be nice," I said. My voice shook.

He didn't give me one, however. He just came forward and leaned down, face pressed to the side of my throat with breath doing all sorts of horribly nice little things to my skin. Teeth pricked my neck right over the spot where my mark should have been—

—but wait, there it was! As soon as Hiei got near it I realized that the thing was throbbing like crazy, and when he actually touched it I couldn't help but arch a little and gasp, heat shooting up my spine like thousands of little feathered darts.

It's an exchange of the soul, I remembered him saying once. _Must be why I can feel it so well now, since I'm nothing _but_ soul…_

"Hiei, stop!"

The words flew out; he obeyed them, teeth scraping across the mark one final time before he pulled up to look at me, eyes half-lidded and lazy.

"You're not making sense!" I said, breath coming ragged. "Why aren't you yelling at me?"

It took him a moment, but then he said through a smirk: "I thought there was something between you and Koenma."

I stared at him. "Um… elaborate?"

He shrugged. "And there isn't."

"… elaborate?"

"It was just the Beasts."

"… and?"

His nose wrinkled in frustration, as if the words about to come out were especially painful for him to say, but why would—

"I'm… _happy_," he said slowly.

He didn't smile at the revelation. I didn't, either. Eventually the moment stretched into many, and Hiei's self-satisfied look returned.

"It's dangerous for us to remain like this," he said (though I didn't know right away if he meant our somewhat compromising position or us lingering inside my soul). "I'm going to take you out of here."

"Oh," I said, trying to act natural because how the hell was I supposed to react to all of this. "Um. How?"

He didn't say anything, but he did kiss me.

The minute my soul's lips touched his my world exploded into mauve and violet, all of it surrounding his cherried eyes, eyes that guided me like lanterns down a tunnel of light made dark, all I could see were his eyes, just those eyes burning like coals…

Then, like with all good fade-to-blacks, I stopped seeing anything at all.

* * *

Light stung my eyes—real light, and real eyes, too—and I blinked up at the shadows flying across my face before squeezing my eyes shut again.

_Damn Hiei,_ I thought without really knowing why, and then I remembered why I should feel that way—why did he always pick the weirdest moments to get affectionate?—and added: _Damn Koenma, too. Damn them _both_! Damn Koenma for abandoning me to the stupid Beast alibi and damn Hiei for being a confusing mother-fu—_

"She's waking up," Kuwabara whispered.

His voice made my thoughts flee and become replaced by confusion; my temples felt fuzzy, like my brain was made of cotton. "Wuzzappenin'?" I mumbled, putting a hand over my eyes.

Sweet, inside me, burbled a joyous reunion. Her presence rushed over my body like a breaking wave, but not in a frightening way, and in an automatic response I beamed love at her, basking in the warmth of her affection. She'd missed me, that much was obvious.

A snort I recognized as Genkai's sounded out like cannon fire, breaking my attention from the Salamander. "Exactly what I was expecting, that's what. Ren's little trick reversed itself, reopening your wound."

"We wanted you to stay here so you wouldn't be alone when and if it happened," Kurama added with his typically silky voice. "We didn't know how you would react, and given the way you did react… you were lucky you didn't make it out the door."

It took me a minute to remember what had been going on before I had the altercation with Koenma and Hiei. _So that's why they didn't want me running off,_ I thought, sullen but not unhappy. _They could've just said so._

"How are you feeling, Dani-san?" came Yukina's soft voice.

"Weird," I grunted. I tried to sit up, felt woozy, and promptly laid back down.

A cold hand on my forehead felt like the hand of god, but I wasn't surprised to hear Yukina say: "I patched you up as best I could, but I did not want to push too hard. I do not know how Ren's energy will mix with my own, nor how all three of ours would act when combined."

"And for the record, Dani, yours mixes horribly with Ren's," Genkai said. "It's too logical for you."

My mouth twitched. Was that an insult?

"That's why you dived so far into yourself, to get away from it," she went on. "Don't let her do anything to you again, understand?"

"I get it," I gritted out (all of this was, after all, the same things Koenma had told me), and I somehow managed to open my eyes all the way. Yukina's concerned face hovered just above mine, as did Kuwabara's. Kurama and Genkai stood by my feet.

"Where's Hiei?" I asked without really thinking about it. When everyone either smirked (Genkai), looked pointedly away (Kurama, Yukina), or fidgeted awkwardly (Kuwabara), I tried not to blush.

_Oh, right,_ I thought. _We're public now. Great. Now they'll think I'm being all cutesy or clingy if I bring him up._

"He's checking on Ren," Genkai told me, smirk still firmly in place.

I said: "Oh."

I thought: _That's sure nice of him… what's his ulterior motive? Knowing Hiei, it's a big one._

Genkai said, "He said you had a run-in with the Beasts. She might also be at risk."

_At risk, my ass,_ I thought, but all I said was: "Yusuke?"

"Talking to Kenichi and Keiko about the trip to town."

"… Koenma?"

"Had business elsewhere."

"Oh."

Genkai exchanged a glance with Kurama. Something unspoken passed between them; no one asked what that something was, and I didn't really care because all of a sudden I felt really, _really_ tired. A yawn made my jaw pop and creak; my eyes began to water, too.

"We have issues to discuss," the psychic said, stepping over me with a smirk. "Stay here until you feel well enough to get in your own bed, then rest."

"Don't gotta tell me twice," I grumbled, putting my arm over my face to block out the light. The door slid shut behind Kurama and Genkai with a clatter.

It took a few moments for their steps to fade down the hall, but when they did Kuwabara wasted no time in talking to me in a hushed whisper. Each word sounded too loud, like someone had turned up the volume on my internal microphone.

"You scared us real bad, Dani," Kuwabara said. He touched my hand briefly in comfort. "Blood flying everywhere, you falling down…" His words turned sarcastic, though good-humoredly. "Boy, you sure do get hurt a lot!"

I cracked an eye at him, and a smile, too, for which he seemed somewhat grateful if I were reading his relaxed shoulders right. My fatigue faded a little thanks to the conversation, having to use my brain making me more sharp.

"I'm a troublemaker, I guess," I said, but before I could apologize a spear of pain threatened to split my head in two. I tried to keep the pain in check and not groan aloud; I didn't want Kuwabara to call me dramatic on top of clumsy.

Yukina, however, saw me wince. "Let me go get you a cold wet rag for you headache, Dani-san," she said. "The residual pain might linger for a few hours."

"Great," I mumbled, teeth clenched.

"Just lie here until I come back; I promise to be quick."

"Sure."

When she left, Kuwabara followed after her like a besotted puppy (not that that was far from the truth, after all, but that's obvious so I'll stop talking about it). This left me alone of the floor, feeling a little cold and a little lonely but mostly just sort of… numb. Numb, and thoughtful.

I was glad everyone had left, in a way. I had a lot to think about. Being told that you kinda-sorta caused the apocalypse isn't all that easy a thing to stomach. Then again, of course, spilling every horrible truth you know to someone you trusted to understand an important situation, only to have them call you delusional and confused… well, that's not the best thing to hear, either, and neither is having another person you trusted abandon you to the wolves when an easy alibi comes along…

Learning that your worst enemy is somehow connected quite intimately to your best friend—a best friend who could turn deadly if played the wrong way—is also a bit heavy.

As much as I wanted to pursue the matter of Hiei knowing the truth but not believing it, and the matter of Koenma's betrayal, the Seishou and Ren thing was what worried me the most, even more than Hiei not believing that I was from another world and Koenma ditching me _combined_. The way Koenma had talked about Seishou knowing so much about Ren… it made it seem like he and Ren were more than just people with a common goal. They gave up their lives together to save me, so what if…

_What if he was in love with Ren or something?_ I thought, stomach churning with nerves. _What if he was helping her because he knew she couldn't, I dunno, be happy without me? And Koenma said to keep them apart—that makes it sound like Ren has a thing for Seishou or something, that she might go back to him if she sees him again! And just look at the facts: Seishou was dead set on getting Ren out of the pods himself, so maybe his goal was less about using her to get to the machine than it was about reclaiming his lost lover!_

Sweet whined inside me, unhappy at the thought. She fed off my affection for Ren; the thought of a betrayal hurt her the same way it hurt me.

"Great," I murmured to the empty room, trying to cover both mine and Sweet's pain with sarcasm. "Great. My best friend's boyfriend is the main bad guy or something, and mine thinks I'm a gullible nutcase. Now isn't this just peachy?"

Just then, I heard the door slide open. Footsteps crossed over to me, each one vibrating in my back when heels and toes struck the floorboards.

"Hello again," I said, waving the hand not draped over my eyes at the intruder, who I assumed to be Yukina or Kuwabara. "You two manage to get water without the kitchen?"

Silence.

Then: "What are you talking about?"

Sweet twittered like an idiotic schoolgirl at the sound of his voice; she, it seemed, was not nearly as irked or as confused by Hiei as I was. I tried to sit up on reflex, failed, and smacked the back of my head against the floor. The pain made my eyes pop open; Hiei stood over me, scowling, and I cracked a somewhat hysterical smile. This only made his scowl deepen.

"Hi," I said. Thoughts ran along the (far less articulate) lines of: _Oh dear god, what am I supposed to say to him now? Should I be angry, because I am angry, or should I just do what he wants and say that future Koenma was really a Beast to avoid conflict? _

My smile grew wider, more hysterical, and Hiei's frown grew concerned._ Ohgodwhyohgodwhyohgodwhy—_

Footsteps from down the hall broke our mismatched staring contest. Without a word Hiei turned on his heel and left the room, not bothering to shut the door behind him—just as well, because not a moment after he vanished Yukina came back, Kuwabara in tow.

"We had to get the water from the bathroom since the kitchen is out of order, so I am sorry it took so long, Dani-san," she said, kneeling next to me so she could drape a damp cloth across my forehead and eyes. It felt heavenly, like liquid dark. "Better?"

"Much," I said, relaxing under the coolness. My eyes were heavy again, suddenly, and despite the hard floor I felt comfy and…

"Just try to lie still and keep quiet for a few minutes," Yukina said. She touched the cloth and it became cooler with the influx of her power. "You need some nice rest."

"A nap might not hurt," I suggested, feeling sleepy—

* * *

I blinked at the ceiling, stupefied. Then I remembered that I had fallen asleep.

_How long was I out? _I thought. _I don't usually drop off that quickly. This whole head wound thing must be messing with me hardcore._

I had no idea how much time had passed, no idea how long I'd slept, no idea what was going on, but I felt mostly recovered so I didn't let my lack of knowledge bother me. No one was around, the only evidence of Yukina's presence the now-dry cloth still draped across my face. I sat up slowly, stuffing the cloth into my pocket; luckily I didn't feel woozy anymore, just a little weak in the knees as I grabbed my staff (thank you, whoever left it next to me!), stood up, and very slowly left the room behind in order to go find somebody to fill me in on at _least_ the time of day.

And even though the thought made me nervous, finding Hiei and working out the whole Koenma thing wouldn't go amiss, either…

I didn't make it far on my mission, though. An open door caught my eye down the corridor, and when I got closer I realized that the door was a familiar one indeed. I walked inside with a smile, hushed by the solemnity of a room I hadn't realized I'd missed.

The piano was exactly how I'd left it—ragged, old, but still in good working order on the inside. With a little gasp of delight I went to the bench and sat down, flipping open the key cover so I could run my fingers across the tarnished ivories.

"Have you missed me, baby?" I crooned as I played some warm-up scales. "Oh, and you're in tune for me and everything! Good piano!"

With a flourish I began playing a jazzed up version of Pachelbel's Canon, weaving the harmonic notes with my right hand over and under the steady bass line I kept with my left. It felt good to work my hands and stretch my musical muscles, especially since I hadn't done it in what seemed like forever… when was the last time I'd played piano, anyway? It couldn't have been since the night of Ryu's party, when I had impersonated their professional player…

_Ryu_, I thought as I started experimenting with tempo and key changes. _I didn't have time to ask Koenma about him. If Ren and Seishou are to be kept in separate corners, what's the deal with Ryu? Was he in the past, too? Was he a part of the Seishou-Ren group, or did he split off on his own in that timeline as well?_

_I feel like I have even more questions after talking to Koenma,_ I realized, and I hit a series of sour notes when that thought surfaced. _Not that I actually want to talk to him anytime soon… that lying, self-preserving bastard... _I snatched back my hands and stared at the keys, disturbed by the amount of information I was still lacking, and I moved to shut the piano with a sigh when a voice behind me spoke up.

"Don't stop," she said, blue eyes half-lidded and relaxed despite the tension in her shoulders. "I like that song."

Seeing her made my heart pound, but her face didn't hold any anger—just a bland melancholy, one I did not like and one I could not read. She watched me open the piano one more time in silence; I attempted to keep my cool, wondering what she was going to say. This was, after all, the first time I'd seen her since her powers had been sealed up. Would she be angry with me, or understanding?

In matters like these, predicting Ren was like betting at the horse races: you either got it all, or you went home broke.

"Snuck up on me, there," I said softly. I pulled out an old Uehara Hiromi favorite, "Daytime in Las Vegas," and began to tap out the gamboling number while I asked: "How are you feeling?"

"Like shit," she said. I heard her take a few steps before she plopped down next to me on the piano bench, facing away from the keys. Back hunched, she let her hands dangle between her knees so she could stare moodily out into the hall.

"What's eating you?" I asked after a few bars of jazz.

"You took my powers, that's what," Ren growled. "You didn't have that right."

I didn't let my hands falter in their rhythm. Keeping my voice rational and free of accusation, I said: "The Beasts are our enemies, Ren."

"That's exactly what they said you'd say."

"That's because they're manipulators. They prey on our emotions and insecurities, giving us hollow promises that appeal to our weaknesses and dreams."

The closeness of what I had just said to what Hiei had said earlier struck me, and I scowled. I didn't want to give him any credit, though it seemed like my subconscious was playing hard to get.

"I guess I just don't see why you hate 'em so much," Ren said moodily, lips forging a pretty pout. "They seemed like nice enough folk to me."

"That's because they wanted you on their side," I told her. "As soon as you tell them to fuck off, they get really mean really fast." I laughed a little. "Trust me on this one. One you've pissed them off, they are anything but friendly."

"But still, my powers—"

"I know they're addicting, Ren," I said. She looked down at the floor with a face covered in guilt; I knew what she was feeling firsthand and tried to sound sympathetic. "You feel… powerful. That's why they're called 'powers'. It's like being reborn, when you realize that you're more than just a human."

She turned her face to me, eyes full of longing. "Then why did you take mine away?" she asked, voice cracking a little. "I could finally do all the things my theories said were possible, but out o' reach. It was like… like I was finally flyin', when all my life I'd been told I was doomed to walk."

"Oh, Ren," I said. I stopped playing, letting the notes drift off into nothing, so I could turn and take her hands in mine. "I am so sorry."

"I just don't get it," she said. A tear slipped out of her left eye, tracked down her face, and hit her blue shirt in the collar, darkening the fabric to black. "I just don't get why you can keep yours, but I can't keep mine." She leaned her head on my shoulder, keeping her tone even despite her quiet tears.

My heart clenched when she whispered: "I'm… I'm jealous, Dani. Real jealous."

We sat like that for a few minutes: hands entwined, her forehead on my collarbone, thighs pressed together we were so close. I smoother her hair a few times, trying to give her comfort, but in the end I figured that talking would do more than just sitting there in silence.

"When I figured out I could make music the way I can," I said slowly, "I felt… like I had come home."

Ren sniffed in recognition.

"I'd always known music was in my blood," I said. "But to find that it was literally _inside_ me, close enough to feel and touch and taste… it was magic. Pure _magic_." I swallowed. "My frailty, and my foot… they don't matter to the music. I've never felt more free since discovering what my powers can do."

I eased my hands onto Ren's chest, forcing her to sit up and look me in the eye. She smiled back when I grinned, hopeful and helpful and encouraging, but her eyes still seemed so sad…

"You can have that freedom too, Ren," I told her, and the sadness dried up in an instant of elation. "But you can't get it from the Beasts. Their freedom comes at a price."

She asked, confused: "What price?"

"Ren," I said, smoothing her hair behind her ear, "if the Beasts are allowed to go free… they'll kill us all."

Cornflower blue had never looked so shocked.

"It's true, Ren," I said gently.

"But how do you know?" she blurted. "They treated me nicely, they—"

As she began to tell me just how accommodating she had found the Beasts, I felt the urge to tell Ren everything—my secret origin, my connection to the future, all of it—wash over me as forcefully as a tsunami. I had proof the Beasts were evil, proof Ren needed because she would never believe anything _without_ proof, but…

But I didn't have the proof in writing. All I had was my word. Despite how Ren trusted me, she needed more than that.

Telling her the truth would have the same result as telling Hiei: disbelief.

In this case, I knew that betting on that horserace would see me bankrupted.

When she finished speaking, I told her something that was neither a lie nor a solid truth. "There have been… _instances_, when the Beasts have hurt people," I said.

"People like who?" Ren wanted to know.

"… me."

She stared at me for almost a minute, and when her silence became too heavy I gestured at my forehead. Her eyes followed the motion; then they widened. She reached up to touch my head, fingers shaking imperceptibly.

"The lines uncrossed here, too," she whispered, cold hand trembling against my skin. "They… was it violent?"

"There's blood all over one of the meeting rooms," I said.

Though I wasn't trying to make her feel guilty—as I said, proof was everything to Ren—her eyes still filled up and spilled over with regret.

"I'm so sorry, Dani," she said. "I am so, so _sorry_."

I grabbed her hand and cradled it in mine, staring hard at our fingers._ This hand destroyed an entire world,_ I found myself thinking as I looked at her short nails and tan skin.

"I am so sorry," Ren repeated.

I met her earnest eyes.

_But that won't happen again,_ I thought, feeling my heart swell at the sight of her. _Not if I can help it._

"Don't be," I said. "It wasn't your fault—it was the Beasts'."

I took a deep breath.

"The difference between my powers and yours," I said, "is that I actually worked for mine. I practiced, had teachers, had instruction—I _worked_, and I worked _hard_. You jumped right in without any guidance, and the Beasts…" I shook my head in regret. "They didn't prepare you like you should've been. That's why the kitchen got destroyed, and that's how I got hurt."

Ren nodded, lips rolling together in quiet consternation.

"But," I said, "that doesn't mean you can't ever have your powers back. You made _one mistake_, and now you have a chance to right that wrong and start over."

"Really?" she asked, not quite believing me just yet.

"Really," I said firmly. "There are people here, people like Genkai and Hiei and me, who are willing to teach you to use your powers the _right_ way."

She seemed interested, which was a good sign (Ren's attention span, or lack thereof, needed to be sparked in order to gain her cooperation). "They're the ones who taught _you_?" she asked. "Hee-yay, and Gan-kai?"

I nodded, ignoring her butchery of their names for just a moment. "I started out helpless, too, but they trained me to use my abilities properly, no shortcuts, nothing like that."

"And you think I can do the same?"

"Of course. If you work hard, you can relearn them and be stronger than ever for it." I patted her hands and grinned. "If there's one thing they've taught me, it's that practice and hard work mean much more than knowing mere theory, the way the Beasts do. Theory is important, but hard work and the basics—"

"I saved my theories."

Her words came out thoughtfully, like she hadn't considered the notion before that moment. I waited for her to tell me what she was talking about for a few seconds, but when she did not elaborate I decided to prompt her into speaking.

"You mean, you wrote them in notebook?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said. "I mentioned it to ya before—when I got that red book o' yours and messed it up, you remember?"

I hadn't remembered, actually, until she mentioned it. "Oh, right!" I said. "But... what all did you write in it, again?"

She freed her hands so she could count them all off on her fingers. "Oh, y'know, my theories on time travel are in there, and so are my theories on phasin' and matter manipulatin'… oh, and on gravity manipulatin', too!"

"So, all the things you showed me you could do, you wrote down?" I decided to clarify.

Pride colored her from head to toe. "Oh, no—I wrote way more than that!" she said, grinning from ear to ear and with eyes pushed into tiny, delighted slits. "Those things were just the ones I had time to actually _test_!"

I stilled completely, staring at her.

Unperturbed, Ren went on with: "I'd also outlined a theory on teleportation, and one of movin' through dimensions—"

"Dimensions like Demon World, you mean?" I said hollowly.

Ren shrugged. "No, not like that."

My heart had started to scream, blood rushing to fill my face and ears with adrenaline that slammed. "Like what, then?" I asked, trying not to shake because _oh my god is she about to say what I think she's about to say? _"Like, like _what_?"

She didn't notice my reaction, focused as she was on her work. "Well," she said, "I was thinkin' about how this place and that Demon World thing must interact, and to me those seem more like mirror images of each other—like Demon, Human, and Spirit World are all parts of one _giant_ world, but are _separated_, like individual pieces of the same pie."

I asked: "So what _are_ you talking about, then?"

She grinned, devious and with glinting eyes. Those eyes stopped the breath in my throat, making my heart pound harder than a jackhammer on the highest setting.

"I'm talkin' about whole new _dimensions_, Dani," she said, eager to share the truth with me—eager to share more truth than she realized, more truth than I had ever hoped to learn, more truth than I was able to handle. "Places impossible to go unless you can bend time and space itself."

I couldn't help but gasp the breath I didn't know I had been holding, horror mixed with recognition mixed with disbelief melding into one head-spinning cocktail Ren didn't know she had been mixing.

"_You know_ what I mean," Ren said, and she winked. "_Alternate realities_!"

And that, with a mental crash of all the clues colliding into place, is when I remembered where I'd seen the red notebook before.

* * *

NOTES:

_Update days are being switched to Wednesdays because all my classes are basically on Monday and Tuesday and it's reeeeeaally inconvenient to manage a Tuesday update. SORRY! But weekly updates will still happen, promise._

_So… red notebook. Sweet. The truth's about to explode._

_And no, Dani's not done with Hiei yet. He doesn't believe the truth, she has a choice to cover it up or expose it to him (that's what she said), and Ren… well. The truth might not be as hard to reveal to her as Dani first thought._

_Also, Hiei using sexiness to get things out of Dani. Urk. It took me forever to write because OMG WTF I DON'T EVEN- but I guess it kinda counts as a Hiei moment... so... everyone's been asking for one... so... _

_(*hides under a rock*)_

_We're not done with Koenma, either. He did abandon her, after all, and I find that somewhat hilarious. Hiei thinks he's a Beast… PFFT. _

_I need a favor from you guys. If you decide to review, please tell me what you think the greatest love song _ever_ is! I need your input for an upcoming part of the story. The song should, preferably, be joyous and full of selfless love (be it romantic or familial, though hopefully romantic) and if it's EPIC/upbeat/hard-rocky/fastpaced, then, heck, you won't find me complaining. I don't care about the genre or nuthin', but… love songs! Yes! Your favorites! Though I can't tell you why I want to know them, I'll put up a poll with some of my favorite suggestions for you to vote on. You might see the winner featured in a pivotal moment in an upcoming chapter. ;) The runners-up might get featured, too!_

_Actually, I'd love to hear any songs you think might fit Future Talk. Send 'em in! XD_

_And we have artwork, people! The ever-so-lovely __**Ran-Lin**__ drew a WONDERFUL image of Dani and Hiei lounging around together; __**Zetsubel**__ drew a group image of several of my OCs that rocks my socks off; __**Tooty-Scooty**__ drew Dani looking like her usual snarky self and it's awesome! Go check them out and shower them with love; links are on my profile!_

_And remember: __**Go send some emails for the Twombly family**__! Details are in last chapter's notes section. ^^ The more emails you send, the better!_

_Many thanks to the readers who always know exactly what to say! Thanks so much for your support, and I hope you all have excellent weeks! Colbub, Goodbye Darling, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Phantom Hobbit, etowa-ru, PhyscoticOnna, Eggbert3000, Cheshire Blue Kitten, hieisdarkdragonchick, Ry171819, Supreme Baka, Kaiya's Watergarden, Kai-Chan94, rain chant, Takara Rose Oizumi, chococalteluvr13, AkaMizu-chan, DoilyRox, Stellar Spirit, j.d.y., MikaUchiha666, loser94, , OhhTaylorJade, Zetsubel, Procrastination Possum, Kiki Myou, Reiko Tsuchikake, Snowgirl7589, moani-sama, Blazing Neko, Taking A Guess, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Belachfan462, Katt Jeane, DaAmazingMeepers, Foxgirl Ray, Kamiko kiyo, itsallaboutbob, shadowfirefox13, Koryu Elric, Yoko Kiara14, TallyYoungblood, Willowleaf2560!_


	64. Chapter 64: Come What May

Future Talk

Chapter 64:

"Come What May"

* * *

To make a long story short, I had a flashback.

It wasn't a very special sort of flashback. There weren't any wavy camera lines or fades-to-blacks like you'd typically expect to see accompanying an epiphany—because it _was_ an epiphany, of sorts, one that made everything make a horrible sort of sense that got the blood to pulsing hard in my neck and wrists even as my face went white and my lips got undeniably clammy.

My thoughts, you see, had wandered back to my death.

I didn't like thinking about it all that much. The look in my killer's panicked eye, the girl who watched in horror as I bled out beneath the bleachers, the way the blade pierced me and then the way the darkness closed in over my head like water… it wasn't nice, and it was even less nice to think about all the consequences my death had probably wrought. My mother and father would be devastated, as are all parents when their child's life is taken long before its time, and Ren… I hated to think about how she would cope. My parents would have an outlet in getting the man who killed me put in jail, but Ren..

She'd just grieve.

Considering how the grief of one's loved ones weighs heavy on the minds of the dead, who would _want_ to think about their death? I can't count the number of times I've dreamt of mine since it happened, and each dream has been something of a nightmare. I wake up questioning myself and worrying about my parents, about the ones I've left behind and…

It's nightmarish. Simple as that.

However, that nightmare _does_ lead me to the white hospital, and to my first meeting with Koenma, so… so I guess I can't complain too much. After all, even if I died, I traded one life for another. I traded warmth and security for uneasiness… but also for adventure.

_And,_ I thought as the memories washed over me, _maybe even love._

I didn't have time to ponder where that thought came from, though, because the epiphany had begun to grip me tight, and it took my memory all the way back to the so-white hospital that tore me from death's hands. As I sat next to Ren on the piano bench in Genkai's temple, I didn't listen to my-best-friend's-doppelganger chatter on about mathematical theory and bending space because my mind had gone miles (and maybe even worlds) away from my body. I didn't feel the wooden seat or the way Ren's breath stirred my hair, so intent was I on reliving the feeling of the sheets tumbling about my waist when I woke up in the hospital, scared and alone and confused when I saw the chaotic world and devastation that lay outside the hospital's white doors, that her voice faded into nothing more than static.

"Horrible, isn't it?" Koenma had said, and when I'd turned I'd gotten my first glimpse of him: his long hair, scraggly around the ends and in bad need of a trim; his tired eyes, lit from behind by the first stirrings of hope; his shoulders, set as they were with the confidence I needed to see in order to feel like I could accomplish what he wanted…

_He was posturing for me,_ I realized as I recalled the way he acted at first, all imperious and knowing, verses the more manic way he acted today. _If he'd shown weakness, my bravery would've collapsed._

As my mind tumbled over this, drawing closer and closer to my epiphany inch by painstaking inch, I relived the way it felt to walk on untouched feet, feeling the marble floor score cold lines against my soul's soles with every faltering step, waiting for something I couldn't name as Koenma led me away from the scene of destruction and toward a pair of small doors at the end of the row of starched white beds.

We stopped before the doors for what seemed an eternity, my memory-self's eyes locked on Koenma's back. The doors behind him seemed to glow as my mind subconsciously connected them to the bigger picture… one which was starting to grow clearer…

"Well, Dani," Koenma had said, hands resting on the doors' handles, "are you familiar with the concept of the parallel universe?"

And then he'd opened the doors up.

The image of the room beyond burned itself into my mind as vividly as if I were standing in it for the first time. I took in the details in a rush, noting how the space was barren and cramped in comparison to Koenma's old and cavernous office, seeing the grey floor tile and the tracks worn on it by constant pacing, the battered folding chairs that would squeak when I sat on them, the hulking desk with one wobbly leg and a scarred top, the old tube television that hummed softly when it was turned on—behind the TV I could see the bare white walls that were chipped and sooty, the flickering fluorescent lights making the old paint shimmer pale green, _a green so palely complementary to red that the notebook on the desk almost glowed like a small sun_—

And there it was.

The notebook.

It had been sitting on Koenma's desk the whole time.

* * *

I don't really remember telling Ren that I wanted a bath. I moved as if in a fog, trying to process my epiphany as she and I walked back to our shared room. Ren chatted as if she didn't know anything was wrong; I tried to smile and nod in all the right places as she told me about having already had a bath (while I was off on my little jaunt with Puu, in fact), and that she didn't want to take another one because she didn't have clothes to change into.

"We're going into the city on the weekend," I told her, still numb and still reeling. "We'll get you new clothes, then."

Ren beamed at me. "Aw, thanks Dani!" she cooed, squeezing me into a tight hug. "When'd y'all figure that out?"

I pushed away to look at her face. "You mean the trip?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah."

"While you were still asleep, after Genkai…" I shrugged, uncomfortable at the mention of the cancellation of Ren's powers, and tried not to flinch. "You know."

Her blue eyes went darker with her sadness. "Gotcha," she murmured. "What else did y'all talk about?"

"Oh, lots of things," I said offhandedly. Though I wasn't about to tell Ren that she had been a major topic of conversation, I still wanted her to get filled in, so I picked up on the other big thing we had discussed. "Mostly about how Koenma wants to seal up the Book for good."

Ren's brow furrowed. "How's he gonna do that?" she asked. She flopped down onto a futon on her belly, staring up at me with interest. Bare feet kicked at the air over her butt. "I thought you said it was too powerful to get taken away from here, or somethin'. Not that I can figure how a little Book could be powerful, mind ya, but still…"

The thought of a powerful book made me fidget, reminded as I was of the red notebook. "Can I tell you when I get back from my bath?" I asked, voice tense despite my wish to sound neutral and unworried. "I feel like I really need it."

Ren's face fell.

I suppressed a guilty grimace. It wasn't, in all honesty, that I really felt like I needed a bath. I mean, I _did_ need one in a general I-smell-like-sweat sort of way, but that wasn't the main reason I felt like going to the showers. Truthfully, I just wanted to get away from everyone—and especially Ren—so I could think.

That wasn't so bad was it?

_It's not bad at all, _I said as I stood beneath Ren's cornflower gaze. _It's a totally reasonable request._

But why, then, did I feel guilty when Ren adopted an expression befitting a kicked puppy?

"Sure," she said, voice soft and full of understanding. "You go have your bath, and I'll wait here for you."

"Thanks, Ren," I told her. From there, I squashed my guilty feelings and turned to gather up my things—things like shampoo, towels, new clothes—and with instructions to not leave the room, I began to leave Ren behind.

However, her voice carried out after me into the hall. "Hey, Dan?"

I stopped and turned to see her poke her head out after me, lips pressed into a nervous smile.

"I just wanted to say," she said, and she breathed deep before finishing with: "Well, I'm sorry."

My eyebrows shot up. "Sorry for what?"

"For freakin' out," she said. "Y'know. About my power things?"

I laughed at the absurdity of it. "I would've done the same if mine had been taken away," I said. "They're liberating, and we just swooped in and took—"

"It's not that."

I stopped talking, confused at the earnestness in Ren's eyes. She swallowed as I stared, hands twisting the hem of her shirt as she looked at me with all the shy adoration of—of I don't know what, but whatever it was, she was certainly full of it.

"I was happy to have my new tricks," she said after a few moments, "because it meant that even though we were so far in the future… I could still protect you, come what may."

There was nothing I could say to that. Blood had ceased to beat in my veins.

"I mean, you were scared about gettin' in the pods in the _first place_," she hurried to add, cheeks going bright pink at my silence and wide eyes. "I just thought, y'know, well _hell_, I can pretty much rule the world with my new tricks, so Dani's got no reason to be scared of this future now!"

"But I'm not scared," I said, the lies on my tongue rasping harsh in my dry mouth.

"I see that _now_," Ren said, tone sad. "But before, when you woke me up and stuff… your eyes were full of fear. I didn't know how to fix it, and then the Beasts…" Her eyes burned like a gas flame, full of unguarded intent and a plea for understanding, an emotion that I felt (though not in the way she wanted) when she said: "I thought that being powerful could mean security for you. I thought that having those tricks would keep you _safe_, not _hurt_ you!"

I held perfectly still when she walked toward me, afraid to break the moment into bits. Her hand came up, cool-skinned thumb pressing to my forehead right where my old wound had been. Her eyes reflected unbearable sadness.

"I swear, Dani," she vowed. "I only took what they offered because they told me I could _protect you. _That's all I ever wanted."

I reached up because touches were easier to manage than words, taking the hand on my forehead so I could squeeze it between my fingers and palm. The coolness of her skin soothed my racing mind; I laughed a little, looking at our clasped hands with a smile. Her fingers dwarfed mine in much the same way her height eclipsed me by nearly a mile. It seemed absurd that I could be the one to take care of such a capable hand, but—

_But she released the Beasts in the past to bring ME back to life, _I thought, _and she accepted the Beasts in THIS time to protect me, too. It's like I inadvertently cause the apocalypse no matter what state I'm in, because I'm always the more vulnerable of the two of—_

My words came out on their own, arising naturally and sliding perfectly into place.

"I'm not helpless anymore, Ren," I said with more conviction than I'd realized I was feeling. "I can protect myself."

She started to protest. I shook my head to silence her.

"No, Ren," I said. "I _can_ protect myself. You saw the music and my shapeshifting—I'm not helpless anymore, not with those powers, I because of them I have the power to protect _you_, too."

She looked as if the thought of _me_ being the one to protect something had never occurred to her, which it probably hadn't because it had never occurred to _me_ before, and if _I_ had never thought of it then Ren sure as hell hadn't.

"I may not know what happened in those missing years of mine," I said, "but I remember the first twenty. You always took care of me, but now… now I can return the favor."

Our eyes locked together, brown on blue on unwavering solemnity.

"Please," I said. "Let me be the one to protect you this time, OK? No more bargains with Beasts because of me, no more deals with devils—_none of that_, OK?"

It took her a long time to nod; when she did I hugged her, and for the first time since we'd been reunited I felt like we were on the same page.

I just hoped we'd stay that way.

* * *

I sank into my bath with a sigh, and then my thoughts consumed me. They hadn't been able to squeeze in past the monotonous action of showering, but as soon as my hands stopped being busy with shampoo and soap and razors…

The image of the notebook—Ren's notebook, the one Genkai had given to us, the one Ren had filled with all the theories Koenma needed to send me back in time and across the universe—burned in my mind's eye like the light on top of a skyscraper, spinning around and around until it lit up my internal sky completely. Everything hinged on that unassuming little spiral, everything and more, because…

It all made sense, after I took the time to sort it out in my head: In Koenma's past, Ren had managed to fill up a red notebook with all of her theories. Koenma had gotten a hold if it, and when the Beasts took over, he had used Ren's theories to find me, take me from death, and send me here.

_Ren caused the world's destruction,_ I thought as I stared at the steam billowing through the air, _but she also gave Koenma the tools he needed to reverse her actions. _

_But wait,_ I thought, brow furrowing_. If the Future Koenma has the theories to bring me into this world _rightnow_, that means the Past Koenma—I mean, the _NowKoenma_—needs to get them so the Future one will have them in the future… but didn't that already happen, since Future Koenma has them right now? _

My mouth had gone dry again.

_If the past was different_, I thought,_ how did he get the book to bring me into this time, THIS TIME? _

_Or wait… holy shit, what the hell did I just say?_

I sat up in the bath, putting a hand over my face as I thought:_ If the Future Koenma has the notebook, that means that the Now Koenma has to have gotten it to ensure the Future one will have it, but the Future Koenma DOES have it, but the Now Koenma _doesn't_ because the notebook is still with _Ren_… but the Future Koenma still has the notebook! _

I slumped forward, cradling my throbbing head in my hands.

"My brain hurts," I moaned, voice echoing all over the bathroom. "But I guess I just gotta make sure that Koenma gets the notebook in this timeline, so the Future One will be sure to have it."

I dipped under the water, opening my eyes so I could look at my pale body floating like a ghost. Hair fanned in front of my vision like a brown anemone, but when I surfaced it clung to my chest like algae.

I wiped the water from my eyes and nose before saying: "And if I fail to save the world this go-around, making sure the Now Koenma has the notebook might mean that he can reverse time for, for a second saving attempt or something! After all, isn't he going to turn into the Future Koenma?"

Disturbed by that thought, I decided to change the subject… of the conversation I was having with myself, _dear God I sound like a schizophrenic!_ Though I doubted I would ever _really_ understand the physics of all the time paradoxes I was likely cooking up with my half-baked theories and random notions on impossible physics, I felt a bit better after talking the whole thing out with myself even if I _had_ raised questions I didn't know if I wanted to answer.

"So long as Koenma gets the notes, I should be fine," I reminded myself as I settled back down into the water contentedly. "He's the one that needs them. Yeah. Get them to him and everything'll be fine."

_Still,_ I admitted privately,_ I'm freaking confused! But I guess that's to be expected when you twist the laws of physics on their heads. _I frowned, splashing in agitation. _I guess I should just leave stuff like this to the geniuses, eh? Ren could make it all make sense, or maybe Kurama…_

_Hiei would just tell me I'm delusional,_ I thought, suddenly turning vicious. _Yeah, delusional. HA! I mean, I know that Ren needs proof to accept the impossible, but Hiei? I was beginning to think he trusted me._

That made me pause, scowl, and feel chilly despite the warm bathwater sloshing against my skin like liquid silk. I didn't like thinking about Hiei not trusting me—not after we'd been through so much together, seen so many things, shared all our experiences—so I decided not to think about _that_, either.

"There sure _are a lot of things_ I don't want to deal with," I grumbled as I got out of the bath. Being careful of my foot as I sat on the edge of the huge tub, I wiped off the water clinging to my skin and wrapped my towel around my hair in a turban. "I hate that I'm a procrastinator, sometimes."

Once dry, I got up and put on underwear and jeans, taking the towel off of my head so I could slip a tank top over my bra. It felt good to wear clean clothes; they made me feel more ready to deal with Ren and the rest of the world.

_Maybe I'll even be able to deal with Hiei_, I thought sourly as I walked out of the women's' bathing area, bag of shampoo and soap slung over my wrist as I tossed my used towel into a basket. I brushed past the curtain with my eyes trained on my feet and the tip of my staff. _Not that I even really _want to_, of course, but it has to be done at some point… I can't just sit around and leave him to think I'm crazy, can I?_

It was because I was thinking so hard that I didn't see him until it was too late—I mean, I felt like I had just walked into a sauna because it had suddenly gotten really, _really_ warm, but I didn't actually recognize that I had walked into _Hiei_ until my face had nosed its way up against his neck in a horrible mockery of the _other_ time I'd run into Hiei in this very spot in this very bathroom. With a small shriek I bounced off of him, bag slipping from my arm so bottles could scatter across the tile floor. My eyes darted up in shock, catching one brief glimpse of cherry-colored irises before my hair slopped forward and stuck wetly to my face, obscuring my vision as I stumbled back on slippery feet and started to fall—

Unlike the other time, Hiei actually made a move to help me. One hand shot out and grabbed my staff; the other latched onto the wrist not connected to the staff, pulling my body forward by that handhold with a jerk, but since he pulled more on one side than the other, Hiei ended up spinning me in an inadvertent circle. My weird pirouette slammed my back against Hiei's chest; he released my wrist and cupped my shoulder, holding me to him much the way he had when we encountered Koenma inside my spirit.

When I finally came to a halt against Hiei, a little out of breath from fright and motion, I went stock still and tried to process what had just happened—I hadn't been expecting to see Hiei, nor had I been expecting to get so tossed around—but Hiei broke my thoughts in two when he said something right in my ear.

"You're awake," he said.

Sweet hummed inside of me at the sound of his voice, happy to be back in contact with him at last. I suppressed a shudder and started to pull away, but the hand on my shoulder didn't let up. I watched without a word as his fingers tightened around the staff. He had gripped a portion of it just above mine, the skin of his pinky finger just brushing my index. The hand on the staff was his right one, I noticed, and when I took in the white bandages and the way they coated every inch of his skin… well, Sweet liked that a lot, too.

_The Dragon is close,_ she told me in her quiet way. _So close I can almost taste—_

I wrenched out of Hiei's arms and pulled the staff out of his hand. "I need to go back to my room," I said, dropping to gather up my fallen bottles and shove them in my bag.

"Why?" he asked. When I didn't answer, he knelt next to me and handed over a can of scrub, the pink jar looking horribly out of place on his big palm. The black of his shirt seemed dull next to his scintillating hair and eyes, ones which watched my every move like some dark bird of prey.

_He didn't help me _last_ time,_ I thought sourly, taking the jar with a murmured thanks, but then my feelings softened because, unlike last time, he _was_ actually helping me. _Things certainly have changed since back at the start of this whole mess, Hiei most of all…_

"Why do you have to go back?" Hiei asked again.

I stood up, curling my wet hair behind my ears as Hiei joined me. I focused on his chest, suddenly unwilling to look him in the eye.

"Is it the Bright Lady?" he asked.

I really did meet his eyes at that point, mouth parting a little. How had he guessed?

Hiei did not look happy. He had adopted his displeased expression, mouth tilted down at the corners and eyes narrowed beneath a lowered brow. When he saw me looking at him he tilted his head back a bit, looking down his nose at me while he scowled.

"She's on your mind," he said.

"Yeah, so?" I asked.

Hiei glared. "She can handle her_self_," he snapped. "Don't waste your time thinking about her."

My jaw dropped. "She just woke up ten thousand years in the future, Hiei!" I sputtered. "Remember how confused _I_ was when I woke up in another world? She's pretty much going through the same thin—"

"For the _last time_, you are _not_ from another world," Hiei snarled.

I gasped at the shock of being interrupted mixed with the shock of seeing just how vehement he was about the issue. "And for the last time, yes, I am!" came my angry retort.

"Prove it," said Hiei, smiling with dark triumph because he knew I didn't have anything to use against his argument. "Prove that what the Beast told you was true."

"OK, fine," I said. I licked my lips, gearing up my case even though I knew it was futile. "I have my mom's powers because Koenma put me in her body when he took my soul out of the other universe—"

Hiei's logic as maddeningly simple. "Or, you could have her powers because it runs in your family," he pointed out.

My teeth ground together in frustration. "OK, fine then—Ren wrote down theories about time travel and dimension-hopping in that notebook Genkai gave me, right?"

Hiei glowered, unsure of where I was headed.

"Those are the _exact theories_ Koenma would need to send me here from another world," I said. "Time travel, check! Dimension jumps, double check!"

"What's your point?" Hiei growled.

I smirked, laughing a little before the big reveal. "My point," I said, "is that I realized today that Koenma, the one from the future that you think is a Beast—well, he had the notebook when I first met him, before we you guys found me in the woods and WAY before we even woke Ren up!" I jabbed at finger at his chest, grinning. "If Koenma wasn't from the future, how did he have the notebook?"

But Hiei had a response to this I did not anticipate.

"The Beast warped your memory, obviously," he said. "It planted the memory of the notebook after Ren wrote in it, because _you_ made the connection and the Beasts used the connection to make Itself seem more authentic."

To my immense distress, that reasoning made sense.

"That's its game," Hiei said, taking advantage of my stunned silence to further convince me I was wrong. "It toys with your mind and memory, making you believe in the impossible, and it even _admitted_ to being a Beast when I called it by its name!"

"Yeah, but Koenma was also winking at me behind your back while he denied it, Hiei!" I said. "He was only _pretending_ to be a Beast to throw you off the scent!"

Hiei shook his head. "Of course it was. It would throw _me_ off by caving to my accusations, but it would keep _you_ biting its lure like a hapless fish by pretending to share a secret with you."

Breath warbled in my chest, constricted as it was with irritation. "Why can't you just trust me?" I hissed, not caring when I dropped my bag of toiletries to the floor once again. "You keep discounting everything I say, but why can't you just _believe me_ when I say I'm from another—"

"I can't accept it because it doesn't make sense, Dani," Hiei said, voice going cold. "And the Bright Lady's story makes _too much_ sense. You were put in the pods and you wandered out of one, we found you, and now we have the Bright Lady to vouch for all of it. There just isn't any way the Beast-Koenma's story fits into that."

"But—"

"No, Dani," Hiei interjected. His mouth and jaw were set like dried concrete. "Your story might make sense, to a degree, but it makes far less sense than the Bright Lady's. You need to—"

"Hiei, _please_!" I said, and when my voice broke Hiei looked stricken—so stricken, in fact, that he stopped talking and stared at me.

"Hiei, please," I repeated, voice more controlled than before. "Please, even if you don't _believe_ me, can you at least try not to _insult_ me?"

"I didn't insult you, woman," he protested, reaching out as if to touch me, but I flinched away and he pulled back.

"Telling me I'm wrong and delusional is pretty insulting," I snapped. "You might not mean to be rude, but I believe what I believe and I stand by it, and I think the least you can do is just allow me the chance to prove to you that I might not be as wrong as you think I am."

"But shouldn't I get the same chance to prove that you _are_ wrong?" Hiei asked. His eyes narrowed. "You said it yourself, that we should both give as well as get."

"But you already _have_ had the chance to prove me wrong!" I countered. "You already told me everything you think I'm messed up on—hell, everyone was there when the Grand Mother told me where I'd come from, and I just had to go along and accept it because I knew people would react the way _you're_ reacting and tell me that I'm _nuts_!"

I felt lightheaded from talking without taking any good breaths to break up the constant stream of air. Hiei was staring at me through narrowed eyes.

"So you see," I said once I'd finally regained composure, "you've had your chance. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like a chance as well."

"Why does it even matter?"

The question—voiced the way a downtrodden child would ask why they can't have another slice of cake—made me pause, perplexed and wary of Hiei's tucked chin and… and was that a pout, or did his lower lip just seem a little puffier than normal from scowling so hard? Surely that was it, right?

"Why does _what_ matter?" I asked, looking at him with eyebrows at full mast.

"That I believe you or not," he said, still looking like a sullen little kid.

The fact that he couldn't figure it out without help floored me; shouldn't it have been obvious? "I've been keeping that secret since the day I got here!" I said, exasperatedly throwing up my hands. "Being able to share it with someone I care for is, like, the biggest deal _ever_!"

His not-quite-a-pout-but-damn-near-close grew more pronounced. "Then why aren't you out convincing Ren?" he asked quietly.

I gaped at him. He waited in silence, staring at me.

"Well?" he repeated. "You care for the woman. So why are you so intent on telling _me_ what you think, instead of her?"

"Because… because it's _you_," I told him, numb around the edges and more than a little shocked. "If _you_ don't believe me, what's the point?"

Cherry eyes processed this with aching slowness; I processed it as well, feeling my cheeks grow hot as I realized just how important my words made Hiei sound. It was like the time I'd blurted that I cared what Hiei thought about my body, back in the tent in Demon World when I had to undress to change into a Koi…

Hiei had, apparently, come to the same conclusion, because he said: "You care what I think… like how you care what I think when I see you naked, but you care less about the others."

Despite how he voiced this thought with a lightbulb-moment face and no insidious sexiness or hidden agenda (none that I could see, at any rate), I went even hotter under the collar. "Oh my god," I moaned, "do you _have_ to bring that up?"

He seemed genuinely interested to know: "But isn't it the same thing?"

"Yeah," I said, still blushing like crazy as I stared at the floor. "Yeah, it is."

"But why?"

I jerked my eyes up to meet his concerned ones. "Why what?" I asked.

"Why do you care what I think?"

My mouth worked, chewing on air that words wouldn't come out of. Eventually, however, I managed to blurt: "I care what you think because I care about _you_."

Hiei's eyes opened wide.

"Hey, you already knew that," I snapped, covering my extreme levels of embarrassment with sarcasm. "Don't go getting all doe-eyed on me, now!"

His eyes narrowed, unhappy at the comparison to a happy woodland creature, but all he asked was: "But you care about Ren, too. Why aren't you trying to convince her of your theories? Why _me_?"

I didn't answer him.

"If, as you say, the Beast was Koenma pretending to be a Beast," Hiei said slowly, "why didn't you just play along with him and let me believe Ren's theories? Why complicate it? Why try to tell me what you think the truth is?"

We exchanged heavy stares for a long while. My hair, wet as it was, weighed heavy on my head.

"I guess… I just want to be honest with you," I said at last.

Red eyes went dark. "But not with Ren?"

I stared at my feet, thinking that over. "Ren doesn't believe _anything_ without proof," I said softly. "She trusts me, of course, but if she thinks she's right, I have to have proof to change her mind." I met Hiei's eyes with a wry smile. "Talking to her without solid evidence is pointless, our relationship notwithstanding."

"And I'm different?" Hiei asked, searching my face.

"I thought," I said, "that you might accept what I had to say on faith alone."

Silence reigned in the bathroom for a few moments, loud and obnoxious in my ears.

"And besides," I said, hoping to diffuse the situation by acting breezy, "Ren isn't interested in marking me. _You_ are."

I tossed my hair behind my shoulder, belatedly realizing that I was showing the mark off without anything to guard it—a Band-Aid, my hair, whatever— but it was too late to take the motion back and Hiei's eyes were glued to the ring of lacerations, but those eyes were glimmering oddly behind their usual veil of long lashes and…

"I think," I said, drawing Hiei's sharp gaze back up to mine, "that our situation affords you a few more honesty privileges than she gets, at this stage."

He said with utter certainty: "You care about me more than Ren."

I jumped a little, started by this in a rather unpleasant way. "I didn't say that!" I protested.

His lips quirked. "Didn't you?"

Floundering, I ran my free hand through my hair. "I care about you _differently_ than I care about her, but—"

Hiei cut me off. "How?"

"What do you mean, how?"

"What's the difference between me and her?"

I gaped at him. "Is this some weird, like, pissing contest or something?" I asked. "Because if you're feeling threatened by Ren—"

Lips curled back over his teeth. "I'm _not_!" he said. "I don't _ever_ feel threatened. That's absurd!"

I pinned him with a skeptical look, one he returned with a proud glare of his own. We looked at one another like that for several seconds, until I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"Well, just in case you _are_," I said, "just know that you don't have to be. At all."

Hiei glowered.

"Really," I assured him. "She's my best friend and I love her beyond all reason, but—"

"You love her?"

I paused. "Um, duh?" I said, fidgeting because Hiei was looking at me like I had just declared myself empress of everything in the worst way possible. Disbelief, denial, anger, fear, and every other negative emotion all wrapped up with a nice skein of 'WTF' had taken over his face and body language, and I didn't understand that at all.

"You love her?" he repeated, shoulders as tense as steel cable. "You _love her_?"

"As one friend to another, yes," I said slowly, patiently, and uncomfortably. "What's the big deal?"

Hiei's horrible look vanished as suddenly as it had appeared, dissolving into his usual stoic expression before my eyes.

"What in the world were you looking at me like that for?" I asked… and then it hit me. I almost fell over, but luckily I had my staff and was able to catch myself as I said: "Wait, you didn't think I meant that I was _in love_ with her, did you?"

Hiei looked away, mouth pressing into a line of intense displeasure.

"Because I'm _not_, OK?" I said, and I swore when I remembered something. "I forgot you Japanese people don't say it like we do!" I groaned, smacking myself across the cheek with a palm.

It was true, of course—people in Japan rarely use words like 'I love you' to express affection. I guess they're just a lot more subtle than loud, brash Americans, because my Japanese teacher in college had always looked really uncomfy when people said 'I love you' in her class, whether it be in Japanese or in English, and she'd flat out told us that such bald phrases like that were hardly ever exchanged in real life (the most intense of affection being expressed with "suki-desu," which merely means "I really like"), so…

"What do you mean, 'you don't say it like _we_ do'?" Hiei asked, eyes becoming mere slits in his tan face. "Who is 'we'?"

"Americans," I told him, and my cheeks colored. "We say things like, like 'I love you' all the time."

"Even when it's not true?" he snapped, suddenly angry for no reason I could see. "Why say you're _in love_—" he spat the word like a curse "—with the Bright Lady when you're _not_?"

Irked, I said: "I didn't say I was _in love _with her, just that I… well, _love_ _her_."

The words sounded lame even to me; Hiei's twitching mouth seemed appropriate under the circumstances.

"Hiei, there are differences between _loving_ someone like _Ren_ and being _in love_ someone like _you_," I explained, hoping to appease him with the definitions. "You see, Ren—"

But my words had only brought the horrible look back to his face. "_Now_ what's wrong?" I asked, exasperated. "Is all of this too much for your Japanese sensibilities to handle?"

Hiei swallowed, face falling into an uncomfortable expression.

"C'mon, spit it out," I pressed, but he just averted his eyes and refused to look at me. I pulled back with a scowl to ask: "Hiei, what the heck is up with you tonight?"

He shot me a _look_, a brief but loaded one, before staring at his feet and…

_I didn't know he could look this awkward,_ I thought. _But hey, he's kind of cute when he's all freaked out like this…_

My thoughts stopped dead.

_Wait, _I eventually recovered enough to ask myself,_ why the hell is he making that face! HIEI DOESN'T GET AWKWARD LIKE THIS, DAMMIT!_

Convinced the world was about to end, I took a deep breath and started looking around for Seishou, but my attention snapped back to Hiei when he said something in a voice so small I couldn't catch the words.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" I asked.

He shot me another furtive glance, though this one was barbed with…

Wait…

Was that _anger?_

I was reeling from this when Hiei spoke. "You just said you were in love with me," he snapped, and then he glared.

* * *

Can I take a moment to say something?

I, Danielle Elaine the Compassionate, who moonlights as Danielle Elaine of the Small Brain and Big Mouth, am the biggest idiot to have ever been born.

That is all. And thank you.

* * *

Deep breaths didn't do anything to still my racing heart, and neither did counting to ten, then twenty, then thirty. The only thing that helped was shutting my eyes and tilting my head toward the ceiling, because when I did that I could almost forget that I had basically just told Hiei I was in love with him when that was something I hadn't even admitted to _myself_ yet (not that I _was_ in love with him or anything, no way, not me, we'd only known each other for a few months and love was NOT on the table quite yet), and was it just me or was it really hot in here, because—

"Dani?"

I didn't look at him, because his voice sounded dubious and I wasn't about to face horrible, bloody rejection just yet—not that there was anything to reject, mind you, because I was _not_ in love with—

"Dani. Look at me."

"No," I said to the ceiling. "No. No way. I didn't mean to say that and we are _not_ going to discuss it."

He growled: "I know you're not… _in love_ with me."

He spat the 'L' word again. I gasped a little, looking at him at last to see his narrowed eyes and pursed lips and clenched fists. He seemed… set on something. To my relief, there was none of his original anger, the horrible look had vanished… and he just seemed full of conviction, eyes as firm an unyielding as a stone.

But what was it he wanted to accomplish? What was it he was so dead set on doing?

Surely he had to look that way for a _reason_, right?

"You Americans," he went on disdainfully, "say those words too much." His head inclined, imperious and proud. "You weren't careful with them, because you were just explaining things."

"Uh-huh," I said, numb.

One black eyebrow rose. "So finish explaining them."

My breath came raggedly. "I'm not sure I want to," I mumbled, bending to once again gather up my fallen toiletries. "And I need to get back to my room, so…"

"Have to get back to Ren, do we?"

He sounded pissed, all of a sudden, and the transition from understanding-but-awkward to angry-and-random made me freeze, muscles going rigid with nerves. I looked up with a 'WTF' expression to find him glaring, red eyes burning like coals.

"Yes," he sneered. "You need to get back to your child-friend trapped in the body of a woman." He tossed back his head with a derisive smile. "Doubtless she's gotten herself into some sort of trouble."

My mouth went dry, hands clenching in sudden anger. Incensed, I snapped "You take that back!" with all the force I could muster, drawing energy from slamming my shampoo into my carrying bag.

"Why?" was Hiei's question, one voiced with all the cruelty of an honest observation. "She clings to you like a baby to its mother, and yet you seem content on letting her get away with it—"

I stood up with a growl. "What the hell makes you say that!" I asked. "And why the hell are you acting like this all of a sudden?"

Hiei scoffed, but when he answered me he only gave my first question a response. "Defending her when she tore down the temple?" he asked silkily.

"Hey, she didn't mean to do that!" I said, because justifying Ren's eccentricities came naturally to me, but when Hiei started to smirk I knew that I had pretty much just proved his point. My hand came up to cover my mouth, eyes wide with realization.

"And when she made a pact with our enemies?" he said, his ever-growing smirk telling me that if I defended her on _this_ issue, too, I had proved him even more right.

"She didn't know what they were at the time," I said sullenly, hating that I had just played into his hand, but I was unable to keep from defending her to save my own dignity. My relationship with Ren had always been like that—she protected me physically and offered an unending supply of devotion, but when she acted in ways no one understood and got judged because of it… well, I had always been the one to talk to professors and get her out of trouble. Ren didn't know how to act normally. That was my skill, and mine alone.

It occurred to me, then, that Hiei might be onto something. A child trapped in the body of a woman… a genius child, but…

He stepped close, eyes suddenly going dark with an emotion I couldn't name—as well as one I was all too familiar with: hunger. The hunger in his look scared me, even though I didn't know what he was hungry _for_, and I tried to back up on the reflexes of a rabbit fleeing from a wolf. Hiei wasn't permitting any forms of escape, however: He latched onto the staff and yanked me so we were nose to nose. My breathing hitched at his proximity and petered out altogether when his free arm snaked around my waist. The staff between us dug sharply into my hip, but I hardly felt that because Hiei was just so _warm_—

"And when she hurts you?" he murmured, eyes dragging across my face before coming to rest on my forehead.

My throat felt like it cracked when I spoke. "That was an accident," I rasped.

Hiei didn't reply. His arm let go of my waist, but I didn't move away because he had lifted his hand and cupped the side of my face with it, thumb stroking the skin below my eye for just a moment before travelling upward, pressing lightly to the spot on my forehead where Ren had reopened an old wound. The skin there twinged at Hiei's touch, shivering with heat.

"It's red, here," he said, and his hand dipped to stretch around my jaw—though he didn't grab it with force or anything. The force he applied to my jaw was as light as the touch of a dragonfly, but even still I could hardly resist when Hiei slowly began to turn my face away from his. My eyes fell closed.

"Look," he said, coming close to my ear with his mouth. Hot breath hissed, hairs on the back of my neck rising to attention. "Look at it."

I opened my eyes.

He had turned my face toward a mirror, one of the ones above the sinks. Our image was a provocative one, with the two of us pressed together, Hiei's mouth lingering next to me ear, his hand touching my face, my eyes wide and his eyes half-lidded and smoldering… he was looking at me in the mirror out of the corner of the one facing the reflection, and when we made eye contact he smirked, licked his lips, and spoke.

"Not at me," he said with a chuckle. "Your skin."

My brow furrowed; what was he talking about? I couldn't keep focused, he was so close and—

He growled softly, making me shiver. The hand on my jaw let go, crept upward, and cupped my cheek. His fingers pressed to my temple.

"Look _there_," he said, and I did.

The skin above my temple, the skin that I had been torn twice, was as red as Hiei's eyes. Puffy and swollen, it looked like someone had set it on fire or something, and even though it didn't really hurt anymore…

"Why do you care for her so much," Hiei whispered in my ear, "when she hurts you like this?"

We stared at one another in the mirror, silent. I felt a bead of water detach itself from my hair and trickle down my chest, rolling between my breasts like a bead of sweat.

Hiei's eyes dropped to the water on my skin, tracing its path in the reflection with his sharp eyes. The hand on my staff lifted, a finger tracing the line of my collarbone before he followed the droplet's shiny path and dipped near the hem of my shirt. He caught the drop with his finger.

The finger with the droplet came up, hovered in front of his lips—and then he licked the water off, white teeth flashing between his parted lips. The gesture made my chest hitch and my toes curl, and then his hand, the one on my face, turned me away from the mirror and back toward him, sliding down to curl under my chin and tilt my face toward his.

Just before he kissed me, he murmured, "It tastes of you."

I suppose that kiss counts as our fourth, though the one he'd given me inside my soul had only been for a second and probably didn't really count as our third, but still. Our first kiss had been slow and sweet and simple, full of pleasant shock and a coming together, of sorts, one that fused us and solidified everything we'd been too scared to look at in the light—the darkness of the alleyway had given us courage, I guess, and we had taken advantage of it, much the way Hiei had taken advantage of a moment of solitude to initiate our second kiss. That one had been raw and needy, spurred on by the intensity of the moment and the thrill of maybe getting caught, with Hiei leading because he was the one who had _needed_ that kiss in the forest after holding back from so much as looking at me on the ice. It had been a scalding kiss, one that left me ragged and on edge and bothered, though in the best way possible. The third didn't really matter all that much—a press of mouth to mouth that faded into black, ho hum.

Our fourth kiss was different from those others. Like the third, it began with a simple press of lips, and like the first, it was slow and simple and sweet…

The kiss felt like an exploration. Hiei was gentle—more gentle, I think, than I'd ever seen him, and each brush of his lips left me weak in the knees and gasping, hand letting go of my toiletries _again_ so I could grab at his shoulders in an attempt to keep myself upright. Though I wasn't really trying to analyze anything at the time, I somehow knew that this kiss was Hiei's way of telling me something (though the exact wording of the message got lost in the heat of it all) and that this gentleness… well, I should be paying attention to it when he gently pulled my lower lip into his mouth, teething it slowly before deepening the kiss when I opened my mouth to breathe his name…

He chuckled when I did that, the sound vibrating through his chest and into mine, and then the kiss… well, it changed. Like the second kiss, it became urgent and hot and demanding, one of Hiei's hands fisting itself into my unbound hair as the other crushed my hips against him, bodies afire and sharing in heat I was sure could be felt miles away. I would have fallen over had he not held on, vice-like, because when he pulled away from my lips and pressed his mouth right over the exposed mark on my throat…

I saw stars. Literally. They might also have been fireworks, but my body didn't really care because whatever Hiei was doing…

Well.

Safe to say, I wasn't opposed to it.

He came back up to kiss me after what seemed like a lifetime, and I found that I had missed him. I kissed him as fervently as he kissed me, trying to pour every last drop of myself into the action of—

"I would never," he growled against my mouth, "_ever_ hurt you."

I loved hearing that.

"Not the way Ren did."

That, however—not so much.

I was shoving away from him before realizing why, but when he reached for me again I swung my staff between us like a shield. Sweet growled inside of me, clued in to my inner rage before the reasons for its existence reached my conscious mind, and when those reasons did surface—

"You're trying to one-up her, aren't you?" I said, totally aghast. My lips buzzed, swollen from the insistent kiss. "You _are_, aren't you!"

Hiei had no idea what I meant, if his confused expression meant what I thought it did.

"You're trying to make me like _you_ more than her!" I accused. "All these reasons to not like her, all these reasons why I must like _you_ more—you're trying to seduce me into choosing _you_ over _her_!"

Cherry flashed with the fire of recognition. I gaped; Hiei looked away.

"She's my _friend_, Hiei," I snapped once I got over the shock of it all. "You have no reason to be jealous of her!"

"Whoever said I was jealous?" Hiei spat.

"Um, _you_ did," I said, but when Hiei started to protest I just held up a hand. "It's so obvious, Hiei! You were telling me to stop worrying about her and then you started telling me I was basically her mother, and _then_ you told me that I defended her too much and that you were way better than she ever could be to me—and before all that you freaked out when I said I loved her!"

"_Do_ you love her?" he growled. "You never finished telling me—"

"I didn't finish telling you because it should be _obvious_, dammit," I snapped. I stalked past Hiei without bothering to rescue me things off the ground; he didn't attempt to stop me, or to pick them up. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go hang out with my best friend in a totally platonic way that shouldn't affect our relationship at all, and if it _does_, well, that's _your_ problem now isn't it!"

"You only ever talk about _her_, Dani," Hiei snarled as he came after me, following me into the hall so he could breathe down my neck as I stomped to my room. "She's constantly on your mind—I've felt it through the mark, you worry about her—"

"I'll worry about who I want to worry about, OK?" I said. "Don't get your panties in a knot just because I'm not thinking of _you_ all the time, Mister Jealousy!"

By then we had reached my room; the door was open, and Ren had poked out her head at the sound of our raised voices. She glanced between Hiei and I suspiciously, but she didn't say anything.

"So I'm jealous; what of it?" Hiei snapped with a vicious look at Ren, who just looked at him with a 'who, me?' expression. "She's all you ever worry about!"

I pointed at Ren's head, disembodied as it was in the doorway. "She's ten thousand years out of her time; of _course_ I'm worried about how she's coping!" I said to Hiei. Before he could form a retort, I had gone into my room and slammed the door, cutting him off just as he tried to follow me inside. The sight of his shocked and pissed off face made me even angrier.

"The nerve of him!" I screeched at the door in English. "The _nerve_!"

"What's wrong, darlin'?" Ren asked. "You're angrier 'n a rodeo bull."

She cautiously tried to put an arm around my shoulders, but I shrugged her off and flopped onto my futon, burying my face in my pillow so I could let out a therapeutic bellow. Ren sat next to me and rubbed my back, murmuring soft nothings meant to calm me down.

Her tactic worked. Eventually I was able to roll onto my back and drape and arm over my face, moaning out the words: "He's _jealous_ of you!"

She blinked at me. "Who's jealous of who, now?"

I sighed dramatically. "_Hiei_ is jealous of _you_, that's who!"

"Wait who's Hiei? The gothic lil' midget?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, the gothic little midget, but _watch it_, OK? He's taller than I am." I paused. "And he'd _probably_ kill you if you said that to his face, so..."

"Oh. That's nice to know," she said, nodding sagely. Then her eyes lit up. "And you _like_ the homicidal little sucker?" she teased. "Do ya really think that's wise?"

I rolled back onto my stomach. "Not at the moment," I groaned. "He's being an idiot."

"Yeah, what's he jealous o' _me_ for?" She guffawed. "I'm helpless as of this mornin'!"

I sighed again. "He thinks I spend too much time thinking about you," I told her. "Like, _way_ too much." Pitching my voice to a yell, I hollered at the door in Japanese: "Whereas _I_ think I'm allowed to spend time thinking about _anybody_ I damn well please!"

The door promptly swung open. Ren and I both went stock still… but then we saw that it was only Yukina.

"I agree, Dani-san," she said, "but why are you… yelling?"

Ren and I breathed twin sighs of relief.

"Hoy shit, I thought the shrimpy goth had come t'kill me!" Ren chortled. "Near 'bout crapped myself!"

"I had a… uh, I had a disagreement with Hiei earlier," I explained to the confused ice apparition. "I thought… you know." I fidgeted. "I was being passive aggressive?"

She gave me a slow nod, but she smiled afterward. "I think it's wonderful that you and Hiei have become so close," she said softly, voice filled with sincerity and hope. "Please be patient with him, Dani-san. I do not know how well he is able to handle relationships with others. His caustic nature… well."

She looked away with a small smile. I couldn't help but blush.

"Sure, Yukina-chan," I said.

We sat there for a second.

"Oh!" She appeared to have had a light bulb moment. "I came to tell you that we are having barbeque in the courtyard, since the kitchen has been compromised. Will the two of you join us?"

"BBQ?" I said to Ren.

She looked like Christmas had come early by about a billion years. "Hell YES!" she yodeled, and before I could blink she had hopped up, grabbed my hands, and was pulling me to my feet. "Best meal EVER!"

"She seems… excited," Yukina said as Ren spun around in circles, and when I caught her crimson eyes I tipped the demon a wink.

"Understatement of the year award goes to _you_, my friend," I said, and we went outdoors.

I was, frankly, hoping they served beer at the barbeque, because seeing Hiei again that night was _not_ something I wanted to do sober.

* * *

NOTES:

_ZOMG BBQ I DON'T EVEN—_

_I swear to god, something other than filler comes next chapter. Swear. And it's sorta-kinda-maybe HUGE. Ish. So sit tight. Love ya. Yay._

_AND YOU GOT YOUR DAMNED HIEI MOMENT. AND THEN SOME. UGH. FML. BIGTIME. L WORD. _

_Basically, we have filler, sexiness, and info-dumps up until the festival. Things go a little crazy there, so trust me when I say that you might want to enjoy this chill atmosphere while it lasts…_

…_because it's not going to last much longer._

_The deadline to help the Twombly family has been extended! Check my profile for more info, and send those emails!_

_Thanks so much for the music recs! (*bounces around, psyched at all the new music*) I'll post a poll with my favorites soon!_

_Art Alert! Harpokatt drew Hiei and Dani together looking super cute, so go hit up my profile and give the lady some comment-themed-love!_

_And many, MANY thanks to my readers, all of whom I love beyond all reason. Takara Rose Oizumi, Kai-Chan94, , Btch, , LupinePhyre909, spiritfoxxx821, Goodbye Darling, hieisdarkdragonchick, Supreme Baka, Ry171819, Phantom Hobbit, Yuki Cross, Blazing Neko, Kitsune350, 9shadowcat9, etowa-ru, MikaUchiha666, unknown player, Fuurai, Kaiya's Watergarden, XxXfiction, TallyYoungBlood, Wishing Wanderer, Esprgirl, AkaMizu-chan, WickedLovelyDream, j.d.y., chocolateluvr13, Dreamehz, Yoko Kiara14, Mindchild, yonet-chan, DoilyRox, Kamiko kiyo, OhhTaylorJade, Reiko Tsuchikake, SillyGoddessDisco, Kajihenge Yoko, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, colbub, sicklemoon13, the Under-Cover Fangirl, Procrastination Possum, Ellie, (no name!), Zetsubel, Snowgirl7589, MusicFiend666, Koryu Elric, ink. splater, WillowLeaf2560!_


	65. Chapter 65: Talk Show's On Mute

Future Talk

Chapter 65:

"Talk Show's On Mute"

* * *

Ren's happiness was short-lived, because the barbeque we found Kuwabara fixing on an open-air range in the courtyard turned out to be Korean.

"What in the world is _this_?" Ren said after she skipped over to Kuwabara. She stared down at the meat cooking on the coals with obvious confusion, teeth showing in a concerned not-smile.

Kuwabara (who appeared to have been named the purveyor of the shish kebabs since he was the one with the apron) watched her warily. I watched the spatula in his hand with equal apprehension—surely he wouldn't smack Ren with it if she got too close to the food, right?

"I mean, this ain't the BBQ we had back home, Dani," she said without taking her eyes off the meat. "Where're the potatoes?"

"It's different because we're _not at home, _dummy," I said from my spot on the porch. I overlooked the courtyard for a second: Someone, probably Keiko or Yukina or Botan, had set up three low, square, quilt-covered tables (complete with cushions and carpets underneath) on the cobblestones so we could sit around and eat in comfort; extension cords ran out from under the tables' covers and connected to who knows where for who knows what purpose; each of the tables had an arrangement of wildflowers in its center; ice chests full of bottles and fruit stood near the giant iron barbeque pit Kuwabara had been slaving over; red, gold, and yellow paper lanterns hung from poles set in strategic spots to provide light—

I shivered when the wind stripped by, suddenly glad to have remembered to grab a sweatshirt. Even with the shirt, though, I knew I'd feel chilly before too long unless I got some warm food in me…

"With the kitchen out of commission, we thought a picnic might be nice," Yukina said softly. She had come out onto the porch behind me; I heard her steps swishing softly beneath the hem of her kimono. "We set it all up while you were sleeping."

I turned to meet Yukina's eyes, ones that reflected the lantern light with little bursts of gold. She gave me a small smile with those eyes and her coral lips, a look which I returned with my very ordinary features.

"It's beautiful," I told her, because it all was. The lanterns looked almost magical as they bobbed around in the breeze, and beneath the acrid tang of the smoke rising from the barbeque pit I caught a whiff of the flowers on the tables—the scent reminded me of something homey and comforting, something I couldn't quite recall, but nevertheless I said: "The flowers are gorgeous."

Yukina nodded, mouth curling with happiness. "They're the last wildflowers of the season," she said, eyes on the pale blue and bright yellow blossoms and their slender green stems. "I thought the sight of them might lift peoples' spirits."

Her words troubled me; whose spirits needed to be lifted? Had something gone wrong while I slept? Did Keiko and Yusuke have another fight so soon after making up? What—

Yukina caught my confused look. "Oh, don't worry, Dani-san," she assured me, "it's just that Koenma's visit gave Genkai a headache, and now Kurama won't stop worrying about Seishou and Ryu coming to get us before Koenma can seal the Book, and the seal itself has Botan all wound up…"

"Stress has reached critical mass, huh?" I summarized.

The ice apparition nodded slowly. "The barbeque was actually Keiko's idea. She thought that having a little party might make everyone relax."

"Keiko sure is smart, huh?" I said. I winced when I realized how stupid and repetitive I was sounding; Yukina and I shared a small, wry set of smiles at my expense before the wind whipped by again, making me shudder and wrap my arms around my shoulders. Yukina's lips parted as she began to tell me something.

"Oh wow!" Yusuke said in hushed tones. "This is _awesome_!"

I turned back to the door to find Yusuke standing in it, mouth open as he took in the sight before him. He looked happy, and pleased, and after greeting Yukina and me he took a deep breath of the night air.

"Keiko really outdid herself this time!" the detective went on. He walked past us with a spring in his step, but when the wind careened into him he stopped walking, grabbed the sleeves of his t-shirt, and allowed his teeth to chatter. "On second thought, m-maybe this _wasn't_ such a good idea," he said shakily.

"I was just telling Dani-san that the kotatsu are heated, if the night gets too cold for her," Yukina told him. "I will also be doing what I can to make the cold more palatable."

"You can do that?" Yusuke asked, blinking with surprise.

Yukina nodded, face serene.

Yusuke seemed pleased. "And here I thought that our only walking heater was Hiei!" he chortled. "Must run in the—"

Time seemed to slow as, almost as if in spite of the cold, a bead of sweat formed on my temple.

_Oh no,_ I thought as the drop began an achingly slow descent down the side of my face_. Oh NO!_

Yusuke, just like me, seemed to realize what he was saying before he got to it, looked momentarily horrified, and turned his sentence into a hacking, desperate cough.

Despite his efforts, Yukina's brow knit. "It must run in the _what_, Yusuke-san?" she asked.

Her words had an immediate effect on the detective. He went rigid, brown eyes filling with panic mixed with sudden fear, and he started floundering under Yukina's innocently questioning expression with a babbled torrent of: "Uh, well, you see, um, Hiei—"

Before I knew what was happening I had leapt to both Hiei's and Yusuke's defenses. "What he _means_ is that Hiei kept us warm when we were in Demon World," I blurted, trying to keep casual even though Yusuke had started to imply something he shouldn't have. "He didn't know someone else could do the same!"

Yusuke seemed to deflate from relief. Although he hadn't exactly out-and-out told Yukina that she should have a reason to suspect Hiei was more than just another demon to her, the fact that he had brought up his powers in relation to Yukina's own… Hiei would consider that a violation, I was sure, but luckily I had been there to set things right…

Yukina's suspicious expression turned pensive. "Hiei is a fire demon," she said, "so it is natural he can produce heat, but since I am an ice apparition, it means I can manipulate cold. That includes lessening it as well as intensifying it."

The thought made me frown. Hiei hadn't mentioned Yukina in my presence during the entire time I'd known him; did that mean he didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth? Was he waiting for me to figure it out on my own? Or was he just content to never bring the issue up at all?

Yusuke, however, seemed a little shocked and more than willing to contest the issue. As Yukina turned to me, smiling, Yusuke's face turned pale—then he did a double take, looking at me with utter bamboozlement. He swallowed, thinking hard, and then he stared over Yukina's shoulder (it was like I had just turned purple or something) and pointed first at me, then at Yukina—and then he lifted up a lock of his hair and spiked it before poking himself on the forehead, a clear indication of a third eye and an even clearer indication that he was trying to impersonate Hiei.

_What the hell do you know about all this?_ Yusuke's raised eyebrows very clearly asked.

_Oh dear lord, what have I done?_ I thought as my mouth went dry. Knowing that I had just royally messed up and revealed that I knew something I shouldn't know, I just blinked at him and hoped my face said: _Who, me? I don't know anything!_

After all, there just wasn't much else that I could do, now was there?

Yukina, oblivious to Yusuke's pantomime extravaganza, said: "You'd be surprised at the close resemblances between fire and ice apparitions, Dani-san."

I met her eyes with a brief widening of my own, all thoughts of Yusuke vanishing in the wake of her expression.

"One might say the two races are almost… related," she finished.

And she smiled.

My jaw dropped.

Yusuke's jaw dropped.

Yukina merely looked at me, as demure as the Virgin Mary.

Luckily, the three-way-WTF-staring-contest didn't last long. We all turned when we heard Kuwabara yelp. Ren chose that moment to bound over to us, stopping next to Yusuke with a grin.

"The food's gonna be fine," she said happily. "I declare it safe for human consumption."

Behind her at the range, Kuwabara was looking murderous and waving around his spatula, muttering things as he shot glances Ren's way through narrow eyes. With a frown I noticed that one of Ren's fingers had a smear of something on it, so I limped down the porch steps and grabbed her wrist.

"Please don't tell me you were taste-testing," I said, waving the captured limb through the air. It reeked of spices and distraction, a very potent and welcome combination when dealing with Hiei's familial ties and Yukina's odd little… hint. Or was 'hint' too subtle, in this case?

Ren blinked at me, then smiled coyly. "I won't tell you so long as you don't ask," she simpered.

I sighed. "Say you're sorry to Kuwabara, and _don't_ touch the food until everyone else gets here."

Ren pivoted on her heel, popped the sauce-covered finger in her mouth, and bowed in Kuwabara's general direction. "Go-man nah-say!" she said around the digit, and when she surfaced from her bow she shot me a triumphant grin. "Ta-dah!"

"It's 'gomen nasai,' Ren, not 'go-man nah-say'."

"Oh." A pause. "You're gonna have to write me down a little bit o' Japanese, darlin'."

"Yeah, I meant to do that today and got kind of… busy." My cheeks started to color when I remembered just how 'busy' I had been earlier, when Hiei… And _that_ thought led me to thinking about Yukina more or less implying that she knew the thing I knew but wasn't supposed to know…

_Today is getting weirder by the minute,_ I thought. _What's next, Kurama is actually a woman?_

Ren spotted my blush and rolled her eyes. "You weren't busy enough to not have a tiff with your boyfriend," she said teasingly, but before I could rebut her remark she had skipped off with a cackle.

"You guys sound weird when you talk like that," Yusuke said, grumpy and shivering just a little. "Dani, let's go sit down. It's freaking freezing out here!"

When I hesitated, not exactly wanting to go anywhere with Yusuke when he looked so suspicious, Yukina gently nudged me down the stairs with her hands. "Go warm up, both of you," she said, and before I could protest she had turned and gone indoors.

That left me alone with Yusuke. I looked around for Ren but found her pestering Kuwabara; no hope there when food was involved, and since that was the case…

We sat down at the nearest kotatsu in tense silence. I settled the table's attached quilt over my legs and lap, but I didn't really enjoy the warmth permeating my skin because Yusuke had sat down at a side of the square table adjacent to my own. He pillowed his forearms on the tabletop, leaned forward, and narrowed his eyes at me in what I assumed was supposed to be a threatening look.

It worked. I couldn't meet his eyes.

"OK, Dani," Yusuke said lowly, "tell me what you know."

Twisting my staff in my lap, I said: "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Yusuke scoffed, head tossing back in agitation. "Yeah, right," he said. "You defended me _way_ too fast earlier, like you _knew_ I had said too much. I might not be as smart as Kurama—"

"Who is?" I asked under my breath. In truth, I was just glad I wasn't actually having this conversation with the fox. Maybe having Yusuke figure me out was actually some sort of gift…

"—but after dealing with Koenma for so long, I can tell when somebody's hiding something," he concluded with a resolute nod. "So spill it. What do you know?"

In my head, I resolved to plead the fifth, but then I remembered that Yusuke wasn't familiar with my Bill of Rights and went for the oh-so-un-incriminating: "What is it I'm supposed to know, exactly?"

His eyebrow twitched. "_You_ know."

"No, I don't," I said.

He dropped his voice to a whisper: "Hiei and Yukina!"

My response was a cold one. "What about them?"

Just as he started to reply, looking more and more annoyed with every fleeting second, Yusuke was cut off by a vibrantly voiced: "Yoo hoo!"

_Saved by the grim reaper!_ I thought as Botan jogged toward us. Her blue ponytail swung like a whip when she moved, magenta eyes all lit up when she saw how pretty the courtyard looked. _Oh, the irony._

"Hey, where the hell did _you_ come from?" Yusuke said. Brown eye narrowed in suspicion. "I thought you went back to Spirit World with Koenma!"

"I did," Botan said. She settled down on one of the remaining empty sides of the kotatsu, snuggling up with a contented sigh. "But I came back."

"Why'd you do that?" I said.

"I'm acting as the official liaison between Koenma and the forces of Human World," Botan said, grinning. She as obviously proud of her new title, explaining: "My duties include daily reports on strategy and any activity detected from Seishou or Ryu—"

"Fancy title for a kimono-wearing messenger pigeon," Yusuke said while looking innocently down at his arms, and when Botan shot him a look that said she was about ready to kill him for the insult, he held up his hands and adopted a pleading expression. "Kidding, kidding!"

"You'd better be, Yusuke!" Botan snapped. Then she looked triumphant. "Or I'll tell _Keiko_!"

This, of course, was a threat worse than death as far as Yusuke was concerned. "Hey, I was kidding! Don't get drastic!" he protested, jumping up as if preparing to run away.

"Drastic with what?"

We all jumped, startled, because Keiko had somehow managed to sneak up on us, bearing a massive bowl full of tangerines in her arms. She set it on the kotatsu while Yusuke and Botan sheepishly avoided explaining what they'd been talking about. I greeted her.

"Hey, Keiko," I said. "Wanna sit?"

She did so, taking up the final empty side of the kotatsu. "Kuwabara said that the meat would be ready in just a few more minutes," she said, twirling a lock of her hair around her finger. "I sent Kenichi to go get everyone else."

For a few minutes, Botan and Keiko chatted about how well they had been able to decorate the courtyard with some of the random things Genkai had lying around the temple—this discussion did not, of course, really interest Yusuke, who spent the vast majority of the time staring at me through thinned eyes. I spent the time fiddling with a fraying end of the quilt on my lap, watching Ren as she watched Kuwabara flip and turn the shish kebabs on the grill. The psychic had seemed to develop a tolerance for my blonde friend, as he was showing her through exaggerated pantomime how to manage the spatula, and Ren had stopped nicking food in favor of muttering something about radiant heat and conductive materials. The wind carried her voice to me, even though sitting so close to the ground had lessened the intensity of the breeze by more than a lot.

The flowers' scent hit me while Botan and Keiko chattered and Yusuke stared, and I remembered where I had smelled them before. I reached out and picked up a blue blossom, smiling at it when I lifted it to my nose.

"You like those, Dani-chan?"

I put the flower back, feeling a touch of regret. "They smell like the detergent my mom used to use," I explained. "It's… homey."

Yusuke obviously didn't think my maudlin recollection was worth the waste of breath; he rolled his eyes and said "Girls" in a tone that probably meant he thought I was being sappy and stupid. Keiko, however, seemed to understand.

"Do you miss home a lot, Dani-chan?" she asked.

It took a minute for me to reply, because I had lost myself to a memory of borrowing a scarf from my mother. I had been able to smell it all day that day; stress didn't seem so bad when the comfort of my mother's scent was there to give me strength, and the flowers…

"Dani?" Botan asked when I didn't say anything. "Dani, are you OK?"

"Yeah," I said, swallowing down a sudden thickness in my throat. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking about my mom."

An awkward silence commenced. Botan and Keiko both looked sympathetic, but Yusuke just looked uncomfortable.

I shook myself back to the waking world. "Anyway," I said, trying to infuse my voice with a measure of cheer. "Ren's here now, so I don't have anything to be sad about. When're we having dinner?"

Yusuke twisted in his seat. "Hey, Kuwabara! When's the food gonna be ready?"

Ren and Kuwabara both looked our way, but it was Kuwabara who answered: "Now! Just need some plates!" He turned to Ren and poked at her with the spatula. "You, shoo!"

"That's a universal signal in all languages, I'm thinkin'," Ren said as she scampered off she made a beeline for me but, seeing that there were no seats for her to take at our table, she just stood there awkwardly and stared at me like a lost puppy wanting a bellyrub.

"She can take Yusuke's spot," Keiko said. When the detective looked affronted at the notion of leaving the kotatsu—heated as it was by the built-in heater underneath it, which explained the extension cords I had earlier noticed—Keiko added: "I was about to ask him to help me get plates."

Yusuke's eyes rolled, but he stood up alongside Keiko. Ren didn't wait for me to tell her to take his place, slipping beneath the quilts before abandoning Yusuke's side of the table completely. She scooted my way and wrapped an arm around my shoulders with a sigh, breathing into my hair for a second.

"You two are really weird," Yusuke observed. Keiko promptly grabbed him by the ear and dragged him off, muttering something about not judging foreigners for their customs beneath the sound of Yusuke's shrieks of protest.

Botan, clearly sharing Yusuke's sentiments if her uncomfortable expression was telling the truth, cleared her throat. I carefully pulled Ren's arm off of me and put it in her lap, an act that earned me a pout and silent a blue-eyed plea.

"You Americans certainly are… touchy," Botan managed to say when Ren attempted to cuddle me a second time. "It's… hard to get used to." Something sparked behind her magenta irises. "Does Hiei mind?"

"Does Hiei mind what?" I said. To Ren, I added: "Hands to yourself, OK? People here don't act like we do."

Ren's pout deepened, but she didn't try to put her arm around me. She just sat all snuggled up to my side like a rabbit, or something.

"Does Hiei mind Ren… you know," Botan said. Her eyes hinted at something I couldn't guess, but then she said: "You know… does he mind that you and Ren are…"

"I thought we'd been over that _we're not lesbians_," I snapped.

Botan pulled back. "I-I didn't mean—"

"Of course you didn't," I said, immediately regretting my outburst. "Sorry. I just had… well…"

For a moment I debated asking Botan for advice. My talk with Hiei was fresh in my mind, and I felt like maybe a little girl talk…

_No_, I told myself. _Yusuke's right_. _Bring Botan in and she'll try to take over. It's best if I keep this to myself._

"I'm just a little sore, that's all," I said. "It's making me a bit tense." I reached below the table and passed a hand down the length of my left thigh. "My leg, you know? It's still not recovered from all the walking we did in Demon World."

Even though the excuse was a lame one, Botan's eyes lit up with sympathy. "Can Yukina heal it for you?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Not really. This is just the way it goes."

Ren—who had been uncharacteristically patient while listening to Botan and me talk—saw me gesturing toward my leg and narrowed her eyes in recognition. "Your leg hurt?" she asked.

"A little," I lied, but before I could protest Ren had reached under the quilt, grabbed me by the knee, and twisted my legs into her lap.

"I know exactly what you need, then!" she said, grinning wider than she had all day, and with fervent fingers she began tugging at the laces on my sneaker. "A good ol' dose of my massage-powers, that's what!"

"What is she doing?" Botan asked, sounding suspicious. When I looked at her, I saw that she was watching Ren and me the way most people watch a horrible accident—with horror, but also with fascination.

"Rubbing my foot," I responded, wincing when Ren began to gently tug off my shoe inch by solitary inch. "She's good at it."

Botan nodded, but she didn't say anything. By then Ren had stripped down my bad leg and was rolling up the cuff of my pants, humming tunelessly under her breath when she gathered up my gnarled limb, slipped her thumbs down the length of my sole, and lightly pressed into my flesh. I leaned back on my hands and closed my eyes, concentrating on the way her hands felt as they pulled and pushed soreness around my club of a heel and twisted bridge of an arch—because, lo and behold, now that I thought about it I was indeed a little achy.

Ren is one of the few people who know how to handle my bad leg. My mother had always been the one to rub my foot when it got sore, and when Ren had started showing signs of wanting to help me back when we were little kids… well, Mom had been all too happy to show Ren just exactly what my leg needed in terms of care and maintenance. Ren had been Mom's eyes and ears and helping hands when we went to the big bad world of school; the only person who could ever compare to the two of them was my primary care physician, but even _she_ didn't know how to touch me the way Ren did, and she's the woman who delivered me!

I sighed as Ren touched a particularly sore spot, chased the ache out of it, and then began a slow exploration of my misshapen ankle. Her hands traveled up my calf, manually circulating the blood through my wizened flesh with each digging pinch of her fingertips and each broader stroke of her palm—

"You look happy."

I opened my eyes to find Genkai standing behind Ren. She stared down at the two of us with a face that said little. I gave the old psychic a weak smile, not knowing what to say to her, but luckily she just shrugged and moved off, allowing me the luxury of not having to formulate a response.

I watched her walk away, forgetting Ren's pleasant attentions to my leg when I saw who had arrived. Kurama was standing with Yukina and Kuwabara at the range, chatting with them, and Yusuke was being forced to carry a huge stack of plates. Keiko led him around and took plates off the top of the stack, setting them on tables with little flourishes, and Genkai had sat down so she could start packing her pipe…

I spotted Hiei last. Our eyes met from across the courtyard; he stood on the porch, aloof, with his hands in his pockets and his feet braced shoulder width apart, and after a moment of locked gazes his eyes swept downward, catching onto my exposed—

I pulled my leg out of Ren's grasp and slid it under the table, hands joining it so I could struggled to blindly put on my shoe and sock.

"Did I hurt you or somethin'?" Ren said, looking incredibly apologetic. "Because if I did—"

I shook my head. "I just got cold, that's all," I told her, but as I looked past her and saw that Hiei was still watching me…

His eyes left me when Kenichi burst out of the temple door behind him. The boy smacked into Hiei and glanced off, forcing the fire apparition to jerk around to see just who had run into him. Kenichi halted dead in his tracks, hat pushed akimbo on his tousled head as he clutched a brown box to his chest, eyes wide and just a touch fearful as they stared up at Hiei who was, in turn, staring down at the boy through eyes that were wide and…

What happened then was a simple thing.

Hiei, the joyless jerk of a demon I'd come to care for, appeared… to smile.

It wasn't a very big smile, and if you really want to get technical about it, it was more of a smirk than it was a traditional smile. It went something like this: One corner of his mouth twitched upward, the motion making his cheek stand out a little more which in turn forced his eye to crinkle just a fraction closer to being shut, which in yet another turn made his face go just the tiniest bit softer. His typical threatening scowl had vanished; right then, he just looked… accepting. Like he was trying to tell Kenichi that he didn't have to be afraid of the scary fire demon people had told him was a bad man and not a person to be messed with.

The look was, hands down, the softest smirk I'd ever seen Hiei make…

…so why wasn't he making it at _me_?

The surge of irrational jealousy made me gasp; I numbly watched as Kenichi stared, processed that Hiei was looking something other than murderous for once, and grinned back before jumping over the porch's stairs and sprinting toward us. Hiei watched the kid run off without changing his expression, but then he saw me looking at him and his face melted into…

_And there's his oh-so-cool mask,_ I thought sourly as Hiei's face drained of any telling emotion. _Great. Perfect. Peachy._

_Bet he wouldn't look so calm if he knew what Yukina said to me earlier…_

The thought popped unbidden into my head. I looked down, at the table, nodding along as Ren chattered incessantly in my ear, but I didn't hear her because I was too busy reliving the moment I'd had with the ice demon. Did she know Hiei was her brother? It certainly seemed like it, but…

_Weird_, I thought. _Very weird. I don't know what I'm supposed to make of all this._

"Dani-chan?"

"Hm?" Snapping out of my thoughts abruptly, I looked up and saw Kenichi standing behind Ren. He hesitated for a second, staring at the blonde before bowing low from the waist.

"My name is Kenichi," he said to her, and then he straightened. "It's nice to meet you, for real this time."

Ren blinked at him. Kenichi blinked at her.

I hissed: "His name's Kenichi; introduce yourself!"

"Ren!" Ren yelped, holding out a hand for him to shake, which he did after a long moment of confused silence. When that was done, Ren reached up and resettled Kenichi's baseball cap atop his head, an act that made the kid blush a bit. Ren had a pretty face, and her blue eyes and blonde hair probably seemed exotic to Kenichi, so…

"Dani-chan," Kenichi said, addressing me with his voice and his eyes. "I thought you might like this."

He thrust out the small brown box he'd been clutching, eyes bright and hopeful. When he did I saw the light glint off knobs and dials, a grill and a long thin stalk—

"Is that radio?" I yelped, taking it from him and turning it over in my hands. "Oh my god, is this—"

"I found it!" Kenichi said, beaming when I set the radio on the table and started looking for a way to switch it on. "It was broken but Kurama helped me fix it. I thought you might wanna hear some music from _our_ time, y'know?"

His consideration struck me. Before I knew it I had shot out my arm and hugged him awkwardly to my side. He squirmed, but since he didn't shove me off of him or scream I supposed he was OK with the whole affair.

"Thanks, Kenichi-kun," I said when I let him go. "Thanks, so much."

He grinned, looking angelic despite the dirt on his cheeks, and he told me: "You're welcome."

* * *

Kuwabara announced that the food was ready soon after, but I just asked Ren to get me a plate because, at that point, I was so wrapped up in the radio that I couldn't be bothered to get up and leave it behind.

Despite the radio being so small—a brown box with curved sides and a silver antenna was basically all there was to it—it produced good quality sound and could tune into two separate frequencies (like AM and FM, but they weren't called that). I dutifully tracked through all the channels, spinning the tuning knob all the way around more than once as I listened to what every single channel had to offer, drinking in the music like it was alcohol because _yes_, it was intoxicating and _yes_, I did feel like I could get drunk off of it.

It was an odd sort of music, full of songs I was by no means familiar with, though that isn't to say there weren't any _moments_ of familiarity. Most of the music seemed like it came out of the 80s and 90s to me, the dance stuff tending toward electro synth-pop and funkier beats; the rock music sounded like it came out of the grunge era. There were also a few country-ish stations and one indie station, though they had bad reception so I didn't focus on them much. Still, it hardly mattered—I was more than content with pestering Botan, asking her if the song I was listening to was a popular hit, an oldie, or whatever the case may be, and most of the songs I heard I thought I could learn to like.

However, I was disturbed by a few things. The biggest was the utter lack of jazz music, and the equal lack of blues.

Whether or not you're a jazz and blues fan is basically irrelevant—almost everything has jazz or blues in it. Pop is heavily influenced by jazz, rock is heavily influenced by blues, and vice versa—they're staples of current music, or at least American music, and the bass lines established by… well, I don't want to get into it too heavily here, but the fact remains that I could all but hear the lack of jazz influence screaming at me from that radio.

_If they knew some of the jazz theory I know,_ I thought as I listened to a lifeless number Botan claimed was a top human son, _this music could be great. I wish I could start a jazz movement or something… that would put some heart in this stuff, because right now it all just seems gray._

But there wasn't anything I could do—not that night, at least. As the radio played on into the night, floating over and under everyone's voices…

"Dani, ya gotta eat _some_ time," Ren griped when I ignored the plate of food she'd brought me.

"Wouldn't this sound _great_ if Flea could get in a good bass part?" I said, indicating a rock number spewing from the speakers.

Ren gave me an odd look. "Flea?" she asked.

"You know, from the Red Hot Chili Peppers?" I said.

She made an 'ah' face. "Right. Them." A pause. "You gonna eat now or am I gonna have to take away your new toy?"

I winced and cracked a pair of wooden chopsticks. "Alright, sheesh," I said, and I took my first bite of meat gone cold.

The food was excellent. We had some of the last fresh fruit of the season, grilled vegetables, and barbequed beef out in the open air, air that smelled of flowers and tangerines and winter's cold, and the light atmosphere had everyone talking and smiling despite the clouds of tension looming over our heads. No one sat in one place for very long; everyone kept getting up to get more food, and when they did they'd switch seats to talk to someone they hadn't yet spoken to. I was probably the only one who sat in one place for most of the evening, toying with the flowers on the table and the food on my plate with idle pokes of my chopsticks as I listened to the radio play on.

I just wasn't in a very chatty mood, I guess, which made me a little insecure because even Ren was able to engage with the others when I proved too distracted to entertain her. Somehow, she even coerced Kuwabara into teaching her a little Japanese. "Chopstick," he would say, brandishing the implement in front of her face, and she'd do her best to mimic him through a thick country accent that didn't take well to speaking a foreign language.

I watched her interact with Kuwabara in a fog, until the wind picked up after a time of stillness and tossed my hair into my eyes. I swept it behind my ears, sighing, but the wind just picked it up again.

"Want me to do something with your hair, Dani-chan?"

Botan had approached me from behind, a mesh bag of tangerines cupped in her pale hands. I nodded with a brief thanks, feeling a little self-conscious when Botan settled down behind me and started combing my hair back over my shoulders.

"How about a braid?" she asked, all cheer and smiles.

"Sure."

The motion of her hands felt soothing on my scalp; Botan was good at what she was doing, her French braid even and comfortable even when she reached past me and plucked a flower from the arrangement and wove it into my hair.

"Since you like them so much!" she said when I started to ask, and her thoughtfulness made my slight depression—whatever the cause may have been—lessen.

And just in time, too, because that was when Yusuke broke out the alcohol.

* * *

NOTES:

_[Most of this is taken from an email to WillowLeaf2560, who checked up on me when I went missing last week. I didn't want to have to type it all up again; you'll soon see why.]_

_Hi guys! Long story short: There was a truck, and then there was a small sedan, and my arm (along with the rest of me) happened to be inside that sedan when the truck hit it, and now my arm's broken and I have stitches on my head. We weren't going very fast so there's nothing too serious to worry about, thankfully! They said I probably wouldn't have gotten hurt had I not already had a pin in that arm from a previous break; the pin collided with the car door and caused the fracture. _

_They also had to shave part of my head to give me the stitches, and that was arguably the most traumatic part of the experience. My vanity is unstoppable, it seems. Lol?_

_I'm bruised and sore and it was really scary and now typing is really hard. I feel fine other than the arm, and the break wasn't too bad all things considered… I just have to learn to type with one hand. Yay for developing ambidextrous tendencies!_

_Anyway, I've been dealing with insurance claims and a brief court date and hospital stuff all week, hence the MIA chapter and my general lack of communication with the YYH community. Again, there's nothing serious to worry about, I'm fine and I'm being taken care of, and the chapters will resume their normal ASAP. I'm actually looking forward to writing; this whole mess has me in stress-knots, and I hated neglecting my story. That's all I've been thinking about this week, to tell the truth. _

_I'm sorry this thing is so short after such a long week. My wonderful roommate tried transcribing what I said when I talked, but that was taking FOREVER (not her fault) so I switched to pecking with my left hand, which was marginally faster though not by much… oi vey. I just don't have the energy for more this week. _

_NEXT WEEK WILL BE HUGE THOUGH! I TRIPLE PROMISE!_

_Thanks so much for understanding! _

_Horrifyingly enough, I had this chapter up to 10,000 words but they weren't very GOOD words so I cut them out to spare you the agony of a long but HORRIBLY HARD TO READ AND STOMACH chapter. But that means I have a pretty big jumpstart on next week's chapter, so… yeah. An opportunity knocked! A silver lining gleamed! All the lovely jazz stuff!_

_And speaking of jazz: Music. Dani has more to say on it soon. It'll be grand. You'll see… and Britney Spears is the key to the universe. YOU THINK I'M KIDDING BUT I'M NOT! Fo surius. Next chapter. Tune in. For realz. You'll seeeee…_

_Korean BBQ is delish. For real. _

_Drunk Dani will be making her oh-so-triumphant return, it seems…_

_Yay for Hiei and Yukina being siblings. More on that soon, too, and I garuantee it's probably going to be the funniest moment this fic has EVER had. Seriously. I've had the joke planned since I started this story and I can't WAIT to unveil it... possibly next chapter. MWA HA HA. My pain meds make me crazy. IGNORE THE WOMAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN._

_Thanks so much to my lovely readers (worriers, some of you)! Lilmickey2008, Wishing Wanderer, spiritfoxxx821, etowa-ru, MikaUchiha666, yonet-chan, unknown player, Favorite Character, hieisdarkdragonchick, Reiko Tsuchikake, Takara Rose Oizumi, Anon, Yoko Kiara14, TallyYoungBlood, j.d.y., Btch, Kai-chan94, chocolateluvr13, Snorgirl7589, Kaiya's Watergarden, Supreme Baka, Ellie, Kamiko Kiyo, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Wings of Silver Rain, Angel of Randomosity, Cheshire Blue Kitten, Goodbye Darling, lostmoonchild, Willowleaf2560, OhhTaylorJade, DoilyRox, XxX, nani san, phantomxofxmystery, dramaqueen2, Caralirani, Koryu Elric, Katt Jeane, archangel fighter, Madame Blaze, myxs, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Reality Bores Me, Teacup Kitty, MysticChaos, Da Amazing Meepers!_


	66. Chapter 66: Real Good Man

WARNING: This chapter contains alcohol use! If you're sensitive to such things, well… skim carefully? The ending is the most important part. ^^

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 66:

"Real Good Man"

* * *

The liquor came in the form of a case of bottled beer and two jugs of some drink or another that I wasn't all too keen to try. Genkai didn't seem happy to have the stuff set in an ice chest upon the middle kotatsu, grumbling when Yusuke and Kuwabara began to chortle over their little addition to the party, and when Yusuke actually lifted one of the jugs to his lips—

"One shot at a time, boy!" the old psychic snapped. She stood up and marched over to Yusuke, grabbing it out of his hands so roughly that some of the liquid splashed down his chin.

"Hey, watch it grandma!" he said, but she ignored him in favor of… well, to be perfectly honest, she ignored him in favor of hoisting the jug over her small personal pot of tea and dropping in at _least_ three shots' worth.

"Genkai drinks?" I asked Botan, who was still sitting behind me and fiddling with the flowers in my hair.

"She can hold her alcohol with the best of them," Botan said disapprovingly. "Yusuke will likely challenge her to a chugging contest soon. He always does."

When I twisted to give her a 'Wow, really?' look, she gave me a thin smile.

"He'll lose, of course," she said. "She'll make him think he's doing well, but then she'll just swoop on in and have him in a drunken puddle!" Her face turned thoughtful. "_You'd_ probably tap out after just one drop of Genkai's special sake!" she declared. "Her brew is potent stuff."

I was about to reply in the affirmative when Keiko—who had been chatting with Kenichi—noticed her boyfriend's antics. Bidding the youngster a hasty goodbye, she marched over to Yusuke and snapped: "Just what do you think you're trying to do, Yusuke?"

"Can't have a real party without booze!" he quipped as he handed Kurama a beer. He grinned at the redhead with all of his teeth on full display. "There ya go; drink up! It's a party!"

Kurama's polite smile seemed strained around the edges. "Of course, Yusuke," he said.

Keiko huffed, clearly unhappy with this development. "You're _going_ to set a bad example for Kenichi," she said as she started searching the courtyard with her eyes. After a moment she spotted the boy in question, who had been showing Ren a trick with his spirit energy (something about holding a leaf captive inside a shining, swirling sphere of power).

"It's time for bed anyway, Ken," Keiko called to the kid. She shot Yusuke a dark look. "And a good thing, too. I don't think you should see this."

Although visibly crestfallen, Kenichi made no protests. He just allowed his energy to dissipate, patted Ren's shoulder, and allowed Keiko to lead him back to the temple's sliding doors.

Since Keiko the Cat was away and Yusuke the Mouse was born to play out from under her watchful eye, the detective's knowing smirk turned my way with a mischievous twitch (and behind Yusuke's distracted back, Kurama quietly stood up and returned his beer to the ice chest). "You wanna drink too, Dani?" he asked, tone tending toward the teasing register. "I know how much you _love_ to party!"

I scrambled behind Botan in a flash. "Oh no, I'm not touching _anything_ tonight!" I said, gripping the grim reaper's shoulders as I hid in her shadow. "You know how I am with alcohol!"

"Oh _yeah_, that's _right_!" he said with mock astonishment. "I forgot that you're just the most pathetic lightweight I've ever _seen_!" He walked over to me and knelt, waving a bottle of beer in my face. "Lil' baby Dani can't hold her alcohol!" he cooed. "She'd rather have a glass of milk!"

Pride stinging, I snatched the bottle out of his hand and poked him in the stomach with it. "You shut up!" I told him. "And open this while you're at it!"

He blinked in surprise, just like I had wanted him to. "You mean you're gonna drink?" he questioned in a high pitched voice. "Really?"

"Yes, but I'm only going to have one beer, and _only_ to shut you up," I said, inclining my head to give him a haughty stare. "I'll leave the drunken embarrassments to _you_ tonight." I shook the bottle slightly. "Now open this, please? I want to get my half-hour of tipsiness out of the way, if you don't mind."

Yusuke's face lit up (behind him, however, I saw Kurama and Genkai both put their heads in their hands). He looked to Kuwabara, who reached into his pocket—but then the psychic's face fell.

"Must've left the opener inside," he muttered, frowning.

"Doesn't matter," I said primly. "Ren!"

Ren—who had been fiddling with the knobs on my radio while I spoke with the others—saw the bottle in my hands and leapt to her feet, blue eyes overflowing with a pleased light.

"Are ya drinkin'?" she asked excitedly. She knew of—and relished—all the stupid shit I tended to get myself into when I got drunk, and even though I didn't plan on getting _drunk_ drunk, she was obviously totally OK with the possibility. "Really? Are ya?"

I waved the bottle. "Only if you can get this open for me."

"Sure thing, darlin'," she said. After skidding to my side she took the bottle, slipped the cap between her teeth, and bit it off with a grimace and a twist. She spit the cap into her palm as she handed me the drink, grinning when she saw that most everyone's' mouths had dropped open at her display.

"Ren likes parties," I explained, and when I spotted Ren eyeing the ice chest full of drinks I said to her: "Try not to go overboard, OK?"

She snapped out of her trance with a small gasp, but she recovered quickly. "Who, me?" she asked innocently. "Never!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Oh, so it _wasn't_ you who drunk-streaked across the soccer field during senior prom?" I casually asked, lifting the beer to my lips with a languid smile. "My mistake, I guess."

Ren rolled her eyes, but she still managed to look sheepish. "Just one beer, then," she said with a sigh and an eye on the liquor jugs. "Be back in a bit."

She skipped off like a good little bacchanalian; I moved back to my place at the table and sipped from my beer, intending on only drinking one because I didn't want to get utterly wasted.

Hiei—who had moved back to stand on the porch once he finished eating alongside Kurama and Genkai—stared at me, eyes narrowed, but I ignored him. He radiated disapproval, but since he hadn't talked to me at all during dinner, I sure as hell didn't have any plans to approach _him_.

Back to reality, however. "Do you really think drinking is a good idea tonight, Dani-chan?" Botan asked worriedly. She was still sitting near me after braiding my hair, toying with a flower in her lap absently.

"I'm not going to overdo it," I assured her. "And Yusuke _does_ have a point."

Her face seemed troubled. "What do you mean?"

I put my beer down, smiling as I reached for the bag of tangerines she'd earlier set down. The peel of one of them fell to pieces in my hands, the scent of oranges mixing with the cool air and the fresh flowers prettily in my nose.

"Keiko wanted people to relax tonight," I said. "Alcohol might help with that. I mean, no one should drink to excess or anything because we need to keep up our guard, but Yusuke…"

We both looked at the detective. He and Kuwabara were tossing back twin shots at the other kotatsu, laughing and comparing alcohol tolerances the way most twenty-something males do.

"He looks relaxed, if nothing else," I said.

Botan looked pensive for a second, eyes going from Yusuke to the bottle in my hand and then back to Yusuke. Then, with her expression set into firm lines of dedication, she got up, walked over to the ice chest, and picked up a bottle. Ren was standing next to the chest full of beer, eyeing the bottles and their foreign labels with a critical eye.

"Botan?" I called after her, but she just shot me a small smile and handed the bottle to Ren, gesturing with her mouth that she wanted the cap ripped off. Ren, eager to help anyone in this strange new world, complied.

"What are you doing, Botan?" I asked when she took a sip and grimaced.

"Relaxing!" she said even though her face said she was anything but calm. "My word, but this tastes _awful_!"

Ren and Botan walked back over to me, each carrying a beer, and then they sat down to drink. Botan grimaced when she took a second sip.

"Have you never had a drink before?" I asked, interested. I'd contemplated Botan getting drunk in my fanfiction days (days that seemed like a million years in the past), but...

"As a member of the Spirit World, I am not allowed many chances to… er, indulge," she said, carefully setting her beer aside. She flipped her ponytail over her shoulder, scowling. "Not that I would _want to_, anyway. That stuff tastes terrible."

"What's she sayin'?" Ren asked.

"She doesn't much like the taste of alcohol," I summarized.

"What'd you say, you American-person-thing?"

We all looked up in shock. That question had come from Keiko, who to my utter surprise was _also_ holding a bottle in her hand. She sat down across from me and giggled, cheeks slightly pink as she slumped onto the table. Her brown hair, long and shiny and richer than mine by far, pooled around her face and shoulders like liquid silk.

"You're drinking, too?" I asked dryly (though on the inside I was more than a little intrigued at what this could lead to—Keiko, drunk? That certainly wasn't something you'd see every day.).

Her hands flapped as she spoke. "Not too much, not too much," she said, but by the glint in her eyes I could tell that she'd already had enough to get her more than a little. "I just, you know, _had to_ because Yusuke's a _jerk_."

"My, but what does _that_ have to do with anything, Keiko?" Botan asked. She took a sip of her drink; the grim reaper grimaced. "I mean, what—"

The human girl's face crumpled suddenly. "He could be _everything_," Keiko moaned, face pressed onto the table. "He could be so much _more_, but he's _not_!"

"How much as she _had_ already tonight?" Ren muttered. I shrugged, exchanging an uneasy stare with my best friend.

Ren and I watched in silence as Botan crawled to Keiko's side and gathered the girl—who had started to heave dry sobs whenever she wasn't babbling stuff about Yusuke being something that he wasn't, whatever the hell that meant—into her arms. Keiko latched onto Botan for dear life, pressing her face into the ferrygirl's shirt as though it were a magical tear-absorbing super-tissue.

"She OK?"

Kuwabara had come to stand between Ren and I, black eyes staring at Keiko with obvious concern. "I'm not sure," I whispered, and when our eyes met we exchanged twin 'what the hell are we supposed to be doing?' looks.

Botan's reply came quietly, as though she didn't want to upset Keiko further. "She always gets a bit weepy when she drinks; it's nothing to worry about," she said, and Keiko slumped until her head landed on the reaper's lap. Botan quickly began stroking Keiko's hair, muttering small comforts until Keiko lapsed into silence.

"Should I get Yusuke?" Kuwabara asked, obviously trying to be of help. "I mean, could Yusuke—"

Keiko, however, began to cry even harder at the mention of Yusuke's name.

"Guess not," Kuwabara said dryly. He looked down at me. "Anyway. Yusuke's trying to convince Genkai to drink with us, but I don't think that's gonna happen."

"What a shame."

"Yeah, they get really funny when they're competitive." He paused, smiling to himself, but then he glanced back to me and Ren. "I was going to as you guys if you knew any drinking games. You know, from America? Me n' Yusuke are tired of our normal ones, and when Genkai shuts Yusuke down, we'll need to have _something_ to do."

I leaned toward Ren with a grin; she was the queen of drinking games, no doubt about it. "Hey Ren," I said.

Blue eyes tore themselves away from Keiko's sob-tastic spectacle and gave me an expectant stare.

"Kuwabara wants to know if we know any good drinking games," I said. "Got any ideas for him?"

She lit up like Christmas lights. "Do we got playin' cards, shot glasses, pingpong balls, or what? Or just booze?" she asked.

I posed the question to Kuwabara. "Uh, shot glasses, no cards or whatever 'pi-n-go-po-n-go' are," was his response after a quick glance at Yusuke (who was, you see, done wheedling the impervious-to-puppy-eyes Genkai in favor of trying to persuade Kurama, who didn't appear to want to join in at all if his narrowed eyes were any indication). "What are pi-n-go-po-n-go balls, anyway?"

"Eh, nothing you need to worry about," I told him.

Meanwhile, Ren was cradling her chin in her hand as she thought about their options. "Ask him if he has any spare change," she said a moment or two later.

I did so. Kuwabara responded by reaching into the pocket of his jeans and pulling out a handful of coins, frowning at it before tipping the entire lot onto the table.

Ren leaned forward to look, picking out two coins about the size of American quarters. She weighed them on her palms for a second, squinting with her tongue poking from the corner of her mouth.

"These should do for a good game of quarters," she declared, and with a grin she passed the coins up to Kuwabara. "Tell 'im, Dani!"

Kuwabara, however, just looked skeptical of Ren's triumphant grin. "What am I supposed to do with these?" he asked me. "Play heads-or-tails?"

I shook my head. "No, you're actually supposed to try to bounce the coins into the shot glasses."

"Is that even possible?"

"Yeah. It's fun." Pride made me preen. "I'm pretty good at it, actually."

Since Kuwabara did not seem to believe me (his eyebrows were all full mast, mouth pulled down at the corners as he tried to wrap his head around the idea of bouncing coins), I sighed and held out my hand, palm up.

"Go get a shot glass, no, go get _two_ shot glasses and I'll show you," I said, and he scurried off. To Ren, I said: "Wanna help me show him how it works?"

She was totally into this idea, of course, so when Kuwabara came back she was more than happy to help strip the quilt off of the kotatsu. I instructed Kuwabara and Ren to sit on the square table's empty sides, so that Botan, Ren, Kuwabara, and myself all had a side of our own (Keiko was still lying on Botan's lap, dozing peacefully).

"Quarters is a really simple game," I told Kuwabara, setting one glass in front of me and the other in front of Ren, who sat across from me. "You just take the coin—" (I held up the silver circle) "—and bounce it into the glass, just like this."

With a flick of my wrist I tossed the coin down onto the wooden surface. The flat of the coin struck the table with a 'ping' and bounced straight up, sailing in a gentle arc that ended in the depths of the shot glass alongside a loud 'clink' noise.

"Keep the coin parallel to the table and drop it, but use a little bounce with your wrist to give it some power," I said.

Kuwabara's eyes grew even larger than the coin. "Whoa," he said. "First try! How the heck did you do that?"

I shrugged. "Survival instinct. Ren kept challenging me to this game and winning, so I _had_ to learn or else face total destruction of my liver."

"So Ren's good at it, too?"

I laughed. "Not remotely. You'd think she would be since she's so good at physics, but she's too spastic to aim right."

From there, I took the coin out of the glass and began explaining the game's actual rules: Two glasses start on opposite sides of the table, with the players sitting on those sides trying to bounce the coin into the shot glass. When the player puts the coin into the cup, they pass the glass and the coin to their left for the next player to try.

"Eventually, someone will be slow enough to have BOTH cups on their side of the table," I said. Kuwabara nodded in acknowledgement. "That's when things get dicey. You get _one chance_ to make the coin into the shot glasses, only the glasses are stacked so they're higher and even harder to get the coin into, and if you don't make it on that first shot then you have to take a drink." I slid a glass and a coin over to Kuwabara. "You try."

He dutifully started bouncing the coin, missing over and over again, but his concentrated face showed no signs of giving up. "But what if they _do_ make the double-shot?" he asked as the coin clattered on and on.

"Then everybody _else_ drinks." I giggled. "You start getting really frantic when it looks like you're about to get both glasses, which makes it even harder to score, so be prepared for lots of flying elbows."

Just then, Yusuke dashed up to our table. "Sounds like my kind of game," he said in regards to the elbow comment. "And hey, Kurama's agreed to drink with us, but what exactly are we playing?"

"Coins!" Kuwabara said, and then he somehow managed to get the coin into the glass. "Hey, I did it!" He then looked concerned; he counted off three fingers, mumbling under his breath before turning his face my way. "But Dani, how many players do we need?" he asked earnestly.

"You can play with three, but four is best," I said.

He appeared crestfallen. "Shoot."

"Tell him I'll play."

I looked at Ren in shock. Her blue eyes very clearly told me that she knew what Kuwabara needed, which made my question seem a bit redundant. "You understood him?"

"It wasn't hard," she said with a happy grin. "He was countin', and Yusuke was sayin' Kurama's name, so…"

A pang of guilt made me reach over and touch her hand. Her fingers interlaced with my own automatically. They were cold, but firm, and undeniably Ren with their unevenly clipped nails and chewed cuticles.

_So even Ren's other-self chews her cuticles, _I realized, and the thought made me smile. _Maybe this Ren isn't so different from mine after all. Take that, Hiei!_

Ren was blinking at me in silence, waiting. "I promise I'll teach you some Japanese tomorrow, OK?" I said softly. "I know I've really been neglecting you, and I'm sorry."

"Aw, stop it," she said, cheeks going pink. "You've been takin' care of me, that's all. You've been busy. It's only natural."

"Still…"

"Dan, don't sweat it, OK?" she asked. Her fingers gave mine a light squeeze. "Now tell these boys I'll be joinin' 'em."

Reluctantly, I tore my eyes from Ren to look between Yusuke and Kuwabara. "Ren will be your fourth player," I said.

"All right!" Kuwabara and Yusuke both chorused. Yusuke ran to Kurama's otherwise empty kotatsu and yanked the quilt off of it with one jerked swipe; Kuwabara only followed after offering Ren a hand to help her up, which she accepted with a mangled thanks of: "Doto Taritanto."

"It's 'domo arigato,' Ren," I called, but she just shot me a devious look over her shoulder and sat down with the boys. Kurama greeted her with a smile that she returned with a mannish slap on the back; Kuwabara started to animatedly explain the rules of the game to everyone else, and Yusuke tried to make a shot into the glass. He failed, face growing dark under the force of a furious scowl.

My attention was soon called back to our table. "Will she be able to stand up to them?" Botan asked worriedly. "Yusuke and Kuwabara are both very good at holding their liquor."

"Ren's not so bad herself," I assured her. "Though she's horrible at playing that game, so…" I paused, thinking of how quickly Kurama would pick up on the game and how good Yusuke and Kuwabara were at doing physical tricks. My lips pursed. "Maybe it _wasn't_ such a good idea to let her play with them."

The distinct sound of coins hitting the table made the courtyard come alive with clatter. Yusuke began to shout excitedly, and Ren let out a defeated cry. I turned just in time to see Yusuke pouring a dose of Genkai's special liquor into one of the glasses; Ren tossed it back without complaint, then set up for another round of the game.

"Too late now," Botan observed as coins started flying. "Yusuke is—"

"YUSUKE!"

We both flinched when Keiko sat up and out of Botan's lap, flopped onto the table, and glared at us with red-rimmed eyes. Her nose appeared to be slightly swollen from crying. Botan and I had both, apparently, quite forgotten about her.

"Yes, Keiko, what is it?" I asked her gently.

"And how much did you have tonight, exactly?" Botan added.

Rather than answer, she just leaned across the table and grabbed Botan's barely-touched beer. I started to lunge to take it away, but I was too slow and she had already poured half of it down her throat by the time I had made it onto my knees. Botan was so stunned that she didn't even more until Keiko slammed the empty bottle down with a sigh, but when the shock wore off…

"What has gotten into you, Keiko?" the blue haired reaper squealed. "You hardly ever drink this much!" She snatched the sack of tangerines off the table and furiously began to peel one, spraying juice all over her hands. "Here, eat this!" she said as she shoved the fruit at Keiko. "Maybe it'll sop up some of that swill you just drank!"

Keiko accepted the orange, but she did not do so happily, and she stared down at the segmented fruit for a few seconds before looking straight at me. Her bright eyes were glazed, unfocused… but also sharp with pain. I wondered on reflex what was bothering her so much—as far as I knew she had made up with Yusuke, but earlier she had started crying when she heard his name…

I soon got some semblance of an answer. "We're going to the Sakana festival, just like I wanted, Dani," she said. Her voice came thickly, like she was having trouble with words. "Remember, like I told you when Puu took us?"

"I remember," I said. Then my curiosity got the best of me, even though I knew I shouldn't pry. "But hey, why the long face?" I asked. "You should be happy we're going, right?"

To my extreme and utter horror, Keiko's eyes filled with tears. Botan grabbed her hand to give some measure of comfort, but Keiko shoved her off and turned a tearful glare on me. Mascara had smudge on her cheeks, making her look just the slightest bit like a raccoon, a tanuki, whatever. It wasn't a nice look on the normally gorgeous girl.

"He's not taking me because he _wants to_," she hiccupped, anger and sadness filling her eyes with equal weight. "Not because we're going on a date! He's only taking me because he _has to_!"

"Keiko," Botan started to say, but the human glared at the grim reaper and Botan quickly closed her mouth, going pink across the cheeks as she fidgeted beneath Keiko's accusing stare.

"I want a man," Keiko said, voice slurring just the smallest bit, "who wants to do things for me because he _can_, not because he has to, and that's not what Yusuke does."

Again, Botan tried to intervene. "But Keiko—"

Keiko cut her off. "No, Botan," she said with more force than most drunks could command (even in this state of mind, Keiko was a force to be reckoned with, it seemed, and I suddenly felt quite sorry for Yusuke. Keiko _and_ Genkai on his ass all day? That boy had quite the backbone.). "This isn't the date I wanted. It's not the date he promised. This is—"

"He's protecting you because he wants to, isn't he?"

I hadn't exactly meant to blurt those, but Keiko's logic, drunk as it was, had a hole in it that I just couldn't allow to go unfilled. I took a deep breath to steady myself while Keiko looked at me, eyes wide above a trembling lower lip, every line of her body language reflecting that she expected my words to change everything.

Not that I knew what that 'everything' was, of course. Keiko's ramblings were a little hard to follow.

"Well, think about it, Keiko," I said. I tried to keep my voice even, calm, and reassuring despite all my misgivings. "If he didn't want to protect you, he'd send you home instead of taking you to the festival. He wants you to be near him so he can keep you safe, and even if that's not the context of the date you were interested in…"

Botan nodded, eyes lighting up in appreciation of my words. She shot me a thumbs-up behind Keiko's back. The motion gave me the strength to go on.

"… it's still an affirmation that he wants to do something for you, right?" I concluded.

Keiko's alcohol-fuzzed brain took a long time to process this. After at least a minute of staring at me, she crammed the rest of her tangerine into her mouth, chewed, and swallowed with a grimace.

"I'm just scared," she said with a quiver of her voice and shoulders once the food had been choked down. "I'm just… Yusuke could be so much, but he's…"

"He's lazy and silly and impetuous?" Botan supplied.

Though Botan had been trying to make a joke, Keiko did not take it as such: She nodded quickly—too quickly. She fell forward onto the table, lying on it like it was a raft and she was drowning, her fingers twining into the quilt topping our kotatsu like they could give her solid ground to stand on.

"Yusuke could be so much," she mumbled into the curve of her pale arm. "So much. If only he'd do it." She met my eyes, pleading with me for reassurance. "Why won't he do it?"

"Do what, Keiko?" I asked.

Heartbreakingly, she said: "Why won't he be the man he _could_ be?"

My mouth went a little dry at that point. Keiko's eye shone dully, asking me questions I didn't know the answers to, and _How the hell am I supposed to answer that?_ I asked myself. _What the heck does she want from me? I don't have any answers!_

Only, it was clear that Keiko thought I _did_ have answers. Her eyes shone, expectant and demanding, and Botan hovered at the girl's side with a pointed expression aimed my way.

_You gave her advice, and since she's drunk she now thinks you're some sort of swami_, Botan's look told me. _Don't let her down! Otherwise, she'll cry!_

"Dani, why won't he do it?" Keiko repeated, but with more force this time. "Why won't he be more, for me? For him? For _us_?"

"He, he won't do it because… because it's just not him," I stammered.

"But I _want_ it to be him," she whined. "I _want_ Yusuke to be more than he is!"

"You can't change your nature, Keiko," I said, shaking my head slowly. "If he's a slacker, he's a slacker. You just have to accept him for that."

Her eyes darkened. "But I want my man to work hard," she said. "I want him to be able to, to provide for me! I want him to be kind, and sweet, and—"

"Yes, but that's what _you_ want, not what _he_ wants," I told her patiently. Keiko blinked as if the thought had never occurred to her. "If he forced himself to be exactly what _you_ want, he'd be miserable, and he wouldn't even be _Yusuke_ anymore." A small smile. "What kind of girlfriend would you be, if you made him be something he wasn't?"

Sadness made Keiko's mouth twitch down at the corners. "I'd be terrible," she mumbled, head hanging.

Seeing her look so sad made me, in turn, grow morose. Forcing cheer into my voice, I tried to lighten the situation by saying: "Hey, look at the bright side. Yusuke's a great guy with a great sense of humor, and he really cares about you. You should be happy to have found someone like him—you're really lucky!"

Internally, however, I winced, because part of what I said had been a lie. While I did indeed think that Yusuke's magnetic personality was a major asset in his favor, I wasn't so sure Keiko was necessarily 'lucky' in choosing him. He was brash, loud, flaky, uncouth—Yusuke was everything Keiko _wasn't_, and he was everything I could never see her wanting in her man.

Truthfully, while I was a major KeikoxYusuke fan-shipper when writing fanfiction (they had the potential to balance one another and each keep the other in check), a part of me had always questioned their compatibility. There were true moments of caring that were more than plain to see, but…

_But sometimes, it feels like their relationship is more work that the results are worth_, I thought, but I did not allow my happy smile to falter. _I don't know if that's the anime and manga's fault for not going into their relationship enough, but… I have to keep that a secret for Keiko's sake._

Still, though—even with my smile held firmly in place, Keiko did not appear to cheer up. She sullenly reached for another tangerine and began to peel it, fingers wooden and clumsy on the slippery peel.

"What do _you_ want, Dani?" she asked softly, so softly I almost didn't hear her speak.

I reached and turned down the volume on the radio, which had been playing a pop song beside me on the ground. For a second I debated if I had heard her right, but when she glanced up at me with eyes brimming with questions…

"What do I want from what?" I asked, because I hadn't understood.

"In a boy," Keiko clarified. "You seem so sure of Yusuke being good for me, and I'm not, so I just thought you must know what you want, and…"

Sheepish, she stared at the fruit in her hand. Startled, I stared at her. Her question had caught me totally off guard—I seemed sure of myself? Did she _really_ think that, when Hiei and I had just had a massive argument? If Keiko was insecure in her relationship with Yusuke, what did that reflect on the veritable minefield that was mine and Hiei's little thing?

I sat there, frozen, because I realized in a millisecond that I had no idea how to answer her, and when I opened my mouth to tell her that boys weren't something I often thought about, not enough to have made a list of desired qualities, at least—

A blur of blue caught my eye as Botan grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I flinched at the sudden motion, tugging my hand away on reflex, but she held on like a vice as her face contorted into a sappy-sweet mask.

"You don't have to answer that, Dani!" she chirped, clearly intent of making light of the situation. "I know _exactly_ what you want in your boyfriend!"

I blinked at her. "You _do_?"

"Of _course_ I do!" she trilled. Her hand let go of mine so she could clasp hers beneath her chin and stare wistfully up at the stars. "You want someone to protect you and treat you like his princess! Someone tall and handsome with strong hands and a sweet disposition, who brings you flowers for no reason and who says he loves you all the—"

"I'm getting nauseous just thinking about that," I interjected without a thought, and her face crumpled into a mask of shocked horror.

"You, you mean you _don't_ want to date a sweet guy?" she stuttered. "But, but Dani, all girls want to date sweet guys! It's—"

"There's a fine line between a sweet guy and dating a _girl_," I said, sarcasm dripping from every syllable. "If all I wanted was flowers and candy and hearts, I'd date a girl!"

Frustrated by Botan apparently thinking I was some sort of crazy-for-romance preteen, I grabbed my warm bottle of beer and took a pull from it. The alcohol, scant as it was, quickly made my head grow a bit fuzzy. I let out a strangled hiccup before draining the rest of the bottle, feeling the familiar sensation of tipsiness make my thoughts go muggy.

"So, no thanks on a sweet guy," I said by way of summary. I put down the bottle with a sigh. "I'm dramatic enough as it is."

"Then what _do_ you want?" Keiko said, brow knitting in drunken confusion. "I mean, if you don't want someone kind, or gentle…"

"She _is_ with Hiei, now that I think about it," Botan whispered. "Maybe she likes the rough types?"

When she caught me looking at her, incredulous and take-no-prisoners, she blushed and ducked her head.

"I'm just trying to understand," she said sheepishly. "What kind of girl doesn't want her man to protect her?"

That caught my words in my throat. I sat there for a few seconds, thinking under the watchful gazes of Botan and Keiko. It was true that protection could be nice, but…

"I want someone with the _ability_ to protect me," I said, fumbling for the words because the alcohol was kicking in at just _the wrong time_, dammit, "but someone who knows that he doesn't _have_ to protect me all the time."

Both girls just stared.

"What?" I snapped. "I'm my own person! I'm independent! I can take care of myself! My boyfriend should be there as backup, not as my primary weapon! I'm not a doll he can just put on a shelf and—"

"Dani, slow down!"

The command came from Botan. I stopped just as she wished, panting just a little from exertion, and looked between Keiko and Botan with fresh eyes. Keiko was staring at me with eyes full of recognition mixed with something else I couldn't name, and Botan…

"I didn't mean to insult you, silly!" the reaper said. She crossed her arms over her chest and dipped a vigorous nod. "It's just that you're so _small_, that's all, and before you snap at me the way you snapped at Jin that one time he tried to help you get those dishes—"

(I hadn't thought about that memory in a long time; my cheeks colored in embarrassment on reflex.)

"—let me just say _that_ you, even more than most girls… well, you seem like a romantic, and romantics just _adore_ sweet men."

No trace of irony showed in Botan's earnest face. I blinked at her, utterly confused because I had _never_ considered myself a romantic, and when Botan's conviction did not waver I sat back a bit, chewing absently on my lower lip in bothered contemplation.

"It's harder for you to see because you're _you_," Botan said, "but you're always off staring into space with this wistful, dreamy expression…"

At this, Keiko began to nod as though she wanted her own head to fall off. I felt my cheeks start to flush.

"And when you play music…" Botan shrugged, smiled, and let out a girlish giggle. "Well, you tend to play love songs more often than not, or so I'm told, and that's rather sweet!"

I thought about what she said, mentally tallying up all the songs I'd ever played here at the temple… and Botan was, horrifically enough, actually _right_ about one thing: I _did_ tend to play a lot of love songs. I couldn't be sure about me staring into space, but…

"Oh, don't look so alarmed, Dani," Botan scolded. She patted my hand and delivered her sunniest smile my way. "Your eyes are very big; perhaps the dreaminess is just the way your face falls?"

"Ren says I frown too much," I mumbled quietly.

But Botan only laughed. "Oh, yes, you do scowl quite a lot when people are around," she said, "but when you think no one is looking, you seem more than content to smile!"

At that, my face absolutely burned, and on reflex I tried to hide behind my hair. The braid Botan had earlier given me complicated matters, leaving my scarlet cheeks and ears on full display.

"OK, maybe I have my romantic _tendencies_," I hedged, "but I like to think I'm a realist. I think people in a relationship should be balanced—I want to be able to protect my boyfriend just as much as he protects me, though maybe in a different way, and I think—"

"Do you believe in true love?"

I looked at Keiko sharply. Despite the alcohol in her system, she was looking at me with remarkably lucid eyes.

"Because I do," Keiko said. Her fists clenched on the tabletop, knuckles going white. "I believe in true love that lasts forever."

"Keiko—" Botan started to say.

"And I also believe in what _you're_ saying, Dani," Keiko went on. "I think lovers should be equals, and balanced."

"That's wonderful," I said, because I meant it. "You shouldn't take more than you're willing to give. It's unfair."

Keiko's head drooped. "It's just, I think Yusuke and I have the true kind of love," she said, going red across the nose, "but I, I don't think we're _equals_ at all. And can you have the love without being equals? Can you have one without the other?"

Her head rose, and she looked straight at me.

"Because… I'm starting to think you _can't_," she said.

The world, at that moment, seemed to slow down. I became hyper-aware of the scents of the flowers in my nose, the breeze flying by, the taste of beer on my tongue…

_Please don't let them fall apart,_ I thought numbly, because I could see the danger rising behind Keiko's pretty eyes. _Please, _please_ don't let me be the one that makes them fall apart._

"Keiko, that's the _alcohol_ talking, not you," Botan said, putting an arm around her friend. "You know that you and Yusuke—"

Keiko wrenched away. "No, it isn't!" she declared. "It's all me, _just_ me! I push and prod and try to get Yusuke to be better, try to do things for him and help him, and for _what_? For him to _lie_ to me!" She slammed her hands down on her lap, a tear leaking from her eye before coursing down her cheek like a pearl. "He lied the first time he became Spirit Detective, he lies whenever he has to do something dangerous—"

"So you won't worry!" Botan tried to tell her—

—but there was no stopping Keiko at that point. "He always runs out on our dates," she went on, growing louder and more frantic with every word, "and the first time I gave myself to him, the first time I let my guard down enough to _love_ him, he _left_ _me_ without saying _goodbye_!"

The world, slow as it had already been spinning… came to a stop.

I thought: … _what_?

Botan and I locked eyes, looking away from Keiko with twin expressions of absolute panic on our faces. A moment bled into seconds, and then into at least a minute, until Botan had the strength to clear her throat.

_Oh my god,_ her expression said. _Oh my _god_, what did Keiko just tell us?_

My tongue came out to wet my lips, tasting beer there, and then my tipsiness vanished utterly.

"Keiko," I said, sober because the moment called for nothing less than that, "Keiko, I'm not sure I understand. You said he left you, after—?"

Her face crumpled and fell forward into her hands. A single sob made her shake all over, but neither I nor Botan said anything until she lifted her head and mopped her eyes with her fingers, smearing makeup down her cheeks in a black spiral.

"It was right before he left for the second Demon World tournament," she said in a trembling half-whisper. "I wanted him to know that I'd, that I'd _wait_ for him, and I was scared he'd get hurt and never come back, and I just thought that if we didn't do it then—"

She choked on her own story, hand going up to press against her lips as her eyes welled up again. Botan rummaged in her pockets and offered her a tissue, which Keiko accepted with a shaky smile.

"It was two days before he was suppose to leave," she said once she got her voice back under control. "We were going to spend his last day together, after I stayed the night at his apartment."

"And… so the two of you… had sex?" Botan said, hushed.

Keiko's eyes squeezed shut… and she nodded.

"And what do you mean, 'he left you'?" I asked in a voice I have no idea how I kept sounding neutral, because on the inside I had no idea what the _hell_ I was feeling. It seemed like a whole whirlpool of emotion had begun to churn inside my chest, making my breathing come a little quicker and the pulse beat fast inside my veins. I kept perfectly still as I looked at Keiko, because I knew that if I moved, if I moved just the _smallest bit_ then the swirl inside me would ricochet off the inside of my skin and burst free, slashing and striking and destroying what little composure I somehow kept intact—

From behind the safety of her hand, Keiko's voice quavered as she said: "I woke up the next morning, and he… he was _gone_."

"He didn't… leave a note?" Botan asked.

"No," Keiko squeaked.

"And what was… the last thing he said to you?"

Keiko's eyes spilled over. "He said goodnight, and he kissed me, and went to sleep," she said.

"And what happened when he came back?" I managed to say.

Keiko swallowed. "He acted like everything was OK," she said. Her voice broke halfway through, but she managed to keep from breaking down completely and gently began to wipe the drying tears from her cheeks. "He was happy, and cheerful, and he was a good boyfriend for a few weeks and I thought that maybe having sex with him had made him realize he could be better, but…"

"You mean, you didn't say anything about him walking out on you?" Botan said, totally aghast. "Keiko, I would have been angry!"

"Angry?" I said. "_Angry_? I would have been _furious_!"

"I, I _was_ mad, but he was just so _calm_," Keiko pleaded, as if by trying to appease us she could also appease herself. "He acted like nothing was wrong, and so I thought that maybe I was overreacting—"

"Keiko, how long was he gone?" I asked. "How long did he stay in Demon World?"

"Six months," Botan was the one to say (Keiko winced). "All participants have to serve the new emperor for at least six months after the tournament. It's a requirement for entry."

That information only made my anger sharpen. "Did he send you a letter, a message, anything?" I asked.

Mutely, Keiko shook her head.

"And are you still having sex with him?"

Her reply—one in the form of a hesitant, embarrassed, and tortured nod—made my vision go red.

"I'll kill him," I said, swearing loudly for a second before climbing to my feet. The alcohol I thought I'd fought off hit me a little when the blood rushed to my head, making me stumble just a bit, but I hardly cared because the whirlpool inside me had burst free and begun to rage in a voice of thunder, driving me to all but screech the phrase: "I'll _kill_ him!"

"Dani, no, I don't want you to hate—" Keiko said, jerking over the table so she could grab my staff, but I wheeled on her and pointed at her face with my free hand.

"Keiko, he _used_ you," I snarled. She pulled back as if I'd tried to bite her, eyes wide. "You gave him something precious and he just acted like it was a gift from the corner store! He took you for granted and _he's still doing it_, and if you're not going to stand up for yourself, then _I am_!"

"Yes, Keiko, you need to tell him how you feel!" Botan agreed. She rose to her knees and grabbed Keiko's shoulders, eyes aflame with anger and dedication. "You need to tell him, or else he's going to just keep taking advantage of you!"

I didn't listen to what Botan said after that. The screaming, screeching mass of emotion under my skin drowned out all other thought as I marched over to the table where Kurama, Ren, Kuwabara, and Yusuke—that black haired idiot—were playing quarters. They looked up when I approached; I noticed that Ren appeared to be more than a little drunk with her glazed eyes and red face and spastic attempts at making a quarters shot, but it was Yusuke who I really had eyes for.

"Can I have a word, Yusuke?" I growled. "Like, now-ish?"

He blinked up at me for a second. "What about?" he slurred. He was clearly as drunk as Ren looked.

"I'd rather say it in private," I said to him, and as he stood up with a weary sigh Kurama craned his head to look at Keiko, who was crying quietly while Botan comforted her. Green eyes grew large and flew to me, but I just gave him my most disingenuous smile and walked away.

Yusuke followed me over to the BBQ pit, staggering, but we made it to the iron monster in one piece. I positioned us so that his back was to the pit with no chance of escape, glowering when he grinned as if nothing at all was wrong.

And something was indeed wrong.

Something was very, _very_ wrong.

I'm not sure why I was so angry on Keiko's behalf. Maybe it's because I treasured my own virginity so much that seeing someone else lose it and regret it was just unbearable, or maybe it was because I was feeling protective of her as an author who had written her several times… I don't know. I do know that I didn't like that Yusuke—a boy I trusted and thought was a generally good person—had taken advantage of her love for him and then treated her so badly in return, and I absolutely hated that he continued to act like he was doing right by Keiko when he very clearly wasn't—

"So what's this all about?" Yusuke said. He smiled roguishly. "Worried about Ren?"

I smiled, though with strain. "I don't want to say this too loudly," I said, "so come closer."

He looked perturbed, but he took a step toward me.

I shook my head. "No. Closer."

He leaned forward a bit, clearly unnerved, but he managed to get on my eye level.

My smile took on the bloodthirsty quality of a shark. "Closer, Yusuke," I breathed, and when his ear got on level with my mouth I leaned in, took a deep breath, and said the following:

"Wanna tell me about the first time you and Keiko did it?"

He jerked back in surprise, eyes wider than plates, but before he got too far away I lashed out and grabbed the collar of his shirt. I was by no means able to do the cool lift-him-off-the-ground thing, but I still managed to pull him in so we were nose to nose in order to do my best at intimidation.

"You sleep with a girl and abandon her _for six months_?" I hissed, watching with pride as his face morphed into utter shock. "I know _felons_ who would _rip out your guts_ for treating a woman like that."

"Dani," Yusuke said, but I tightened my grip on his shirt and he shut up.

"Keiko was scared she'd never see you again, and you took advantage of her and what she was feeling for _sex_!" I said, voice rising (behind me, the sounds of coins striking the table abruptly stopped). "That's the lowest, most vile thing I've ever heard of in my life, and don't think for even a second that you're going to get away with it! She told me that you've never showed any sort of remorse for what you did, and—"

"Dani!"

"—and if you _ever_ discount her feelings again, I swear to hell and back that _I will kill you myself_!"

I didn't stay to watch his reaction, _no way was I spending another second on this jerk_, but as I spun around and walked away with every intention of kicking him in the balls should he try to speak to me, I heard a curse, a groan, and a tremendous gong-like crash echo through the courtyard. I stopped and turned, mouth falling open when I saw that Yusuke had somehow managed to tip over the entire black BBQ pit with a punch to its distended belly, which now bore a distinctive fist-shaped dent on its normally smooth surface as it sat on its side on the cobblestone ground.

"You don't know anything!" Yusuke roared, backlit by the coals that had spilled from the fallen range. His silhouette trembled with barely-suppressed fury as sparks fountained up behind him, red flickers joining the stars in the blackened sky like fireflies cavorting with gods. "You don't know _anything_!"

"I know enough to think you're an utter _bastard_!" I screamed back. "You're just—"

"Dani, STOP!"

And I did.

The cry had come from none other than Keiko herself. The girl stood behind me, Botan hovering nervous at her elbow, and when I saw that she was crying I immediately felt horribly ashamed at what I'd done_, it wasn't my place to call him out, of my god what if I'd broken them up for good, what if_—

But Keiko was an understanding person. She _had_ to be, to put up with Yusuke like she did, and when our eyes met she valiantly tried to smile, even though I didn't deserve that look.

"Thank you for trying to stand up for me," she said, putting forth an obvious effort to fight her still-slightly-drunk slurring, "but I need to work this out on my own. I've been putting it off for far too long."

"Keiko," Yusuke said, but when Keiko turned a stoic eye on him, he went quiet.

"Yusuke," the brown-eyed girl said slowly, and with conviction, "you and me… until I figure out how I feel about us…"

"Don't do this to me, Keiko," he said, knowing full well what was coming by the rising dread in his eyes, but she just shook her head and smiled a smile ripe with tears.

"This isn't about _you_, Yusuke," she said. "It's about _me_." She seemed to reach a point of realization, mouth going firm even as her eyes went soft. "For the first time, I'm going to make this about _me_."

Her boyfriend appeared to begin to panic. "What is _that_ supposed to mean?" he asked wildly. "What do you—"

"I've let you walk all over me for too long," Keiko interjected. She breathed deep for a moment, then said: "Until I can figure out just exactly what it is I want from you, or until you can prove that you're not going to treat me the way you have been…"

Even the wind seemed to die down, then.

"Until one, or the other… we're through, Yusuke."

No one spoke as Keiko turned and walked away, heading for the temple with steps only slightly off-kilter from intoxication. It wasn't until the paper door slid shut that we, as a single collective entity, turned as one toward Yusuke to see his reaction.

He stood staring after her with every fiber of his body held as taught as an iron rod. Slowly, though, he appeared to remember that he had an audience, and when Yusuke realized we were all staring at him—

"Shut up, all of you," he snarled. Before anyone could say anything else, he wheeled around and leapt over the fallen barbeque pit, running headlong into the forest as if we were trying to chase him down.

No one made chase, though. No one _could_, because I doubt anyone even knew what to think at that point.

I knew one thing, though.

I knew that this was _all my fault_.

* * *

The party ended when Keiko and Yusuke left. No one had the heart to carry on.

Botan asked me to help her clean up the food while Kuwabara and Kurama went to fetch, among other things, shovels for the scattered coals and Yukina, who would be able to help Botan and I clear everything else. Ren—who had understood little about the situation thanks to being both drunk and monolingual—continued to try to bounce coins into the shot glasses, her trademarked single-minded intensity making itself known.

"They'll be back together again soon," Botan said when we were alone, except for Ren. "This isn't the first time they've broken up."

She didn't sound sure of herself, but then again, who could blame her?

"It's my fault this happened," I said, but I wasn't fishing for reassurance to the contrary or anything—it was just how I felt. "If I hadn't pushed it—"

But Botan shook her head. "No. Keiko needed to stand up for herself. If Yusuke really did use her, then leave her… that's not something she should take lying down."

"That's an unfortunate choice of words, Botan," I said, but the joke didn't make us laugh. Instead, it sent both of us into an uneasy silence that was only broken by the return of Kuwabara and Yukina.

"I'll start shoveling the coals if you guys deal with the food," Kuwabara said, brandishing a bucket and a hoe. Even his cheer seemed forced. "Let's get to it!"

Yukina handed a black plastic trash bag to Botan. "If the two of you would scrape the leftover food into the bag, I will take the plates to the water pump," she said. She looked sad, like someone had run over her pet dog.

"Water pump?"

"It's where I will wash the dishes since the kitchen is not open," she explained. "Kurama has offered to put away the kotatsus and roll the extension cords, and Kuwabara will be taking down the lights." She dipped a bow. "I will be back for the plates, but first I am going to check on Keiko. If you will excuse me…"

She shuffled off, steps slow beneath the hem of her kimono, and if it was even possible I began to feel even worse about the entire affair.

"Let's distract ourselves, hm?" Botan said, lightly touching my shoulder. I grimaced, incapable of even forcing a smile at that point, so it was with a heavy heart that I walked over to Ren and snatched the coin out of her hands. She pouted up at me before flopping onto her back, giggling like a loon.

"People're fightin' all over the damn place," she slurred.

"And you're _really_ drunk," I told her. I jerked my head at the temple. "Go inside and get to bed. You're going to have to sleep this bender off."

Obedient because of her deference to me and the alcohol coursing through her system, Ren slowly rolled onto her hands and knees and began crawling toward the temple. Halfway there she got to her feet and began to skip, only to fall down and have to get up all over again.

Honestly, I had no doubt that she was going to get lost in the temple's maze-like array of halls and tea rooms, but I knew that finding her would be simple enough and thought that getting her out from underfoot was far less dangerous than having her wander into Kurama's room, or something.

_The only danger is the Beasts' containment room,_ I thought, _and the boys will sense her going over there long before she does any damage._

At least, that was what I hoped when I went back to picking up plates and throwing them into Botan's trash bag. We worked in tense silence for a minute or so, watching the Kuwabara try to shovel up all the coals with fervent looks, and we had just about finished picking up all the dishes when Botan grabbed the sleeve of my sweatshirt and tugged on it.

"What do you think _that's_ about?" she whispered. Magenta eyes reflected worry mixed with intrigue. "He's never tried to speak to her before!"

Brow furrowing, I followed her gaze up to the porch where I spotted Ren standing just outside the sliding doorway. That in and of itself was nothing to be concerned about, but when I spotted the person standing across from her—well, my jaw dropped, and I think that that was an understandable enough reaction considering the given circumstances.

Ren was, you see, talking to none other… than Hiei.

* * *

When Botan assured me her that help was more than enough to fuel the courtyard clean-up effort and that it was totally OK if I devoted my efforts to dealing with Ren instead (it wasn't like I was much good picking up an entire kotatsu, after all), I limped toward the porch while keeping a careful eye on the two people I really wasn't too keen on allowing to have a conversation. Hiei was violently gesturing at the ground with his hands, saying something I couldn't quite make out to Ren, who in turn just stared at him with a what-the-hell-are-you-saying look plastered across her face. Clearly Hiei was trying to get something across to the woman, and she was just as clearly not understanding a lick of whatever the fire demon was attempting to tell her.

Though they noticed my approach at roughly the same time, their reactions couldn't have been more different. Ren made a point of grinning at me, turning from Hiei in a clear dismissal, but after he shot a look—an annoyed one—at me, Hiei turned back to Ren and let out a low growl of frustration, which she dutifully ignored.

"Is there a problem?" I said to them both. I put my bad foot and the tip of my staff on the first of the porch steps, ready to jump up to defend Ren if need be. Hiei's accusations of her disloyalty were fresh beneath the layer of guilt I felt for Keiko and Yusuke.

"This'n's tryin' to tell me somethin'," Ren said, jerking a thumb at the fire apparition. "Dunno what."

"I can translate for you, if you want," I said to Hiei.

Cherry-colored eyes burned when they looked at me, and just as quickly they jerked back to Ren. "No," he said, and before I could ask him what he wanted he had reached out and grabbed Ren's wrist.

Ren looked down at the hand on her arm with confusion. "Uh, is he comin' on to me or somethin'?" she asked. "Because I thought he was interested in _you_."

"Tell her to be quiet," Hiei growled. Before I could tell him that he was being confusing and weird, he reached up and roughly covered Ren's face with his hand. "And tell her to clear her mind."

I didn't get a chance to do that, however, because Ren let out a startled 'OH' sound, blue eyes fluttering closed between Hiei's splayed fingers. Hiei's eyes opened wide with shock before falling shut completely, and when his lips tightened I saw that the bandana on his forehead had begun to pulse with a purple light—

"Hiei, what are you doing!" I yelped. I darted forward and tried to push down the arm connected to Ren's head, but it was like trying to move a stone statue (one that felt like it was on fire, but whatever) and all I succeeded in doing was making him bare his sharpened teeth.

Ren, however, did react. She let out a low gasp and stumbled; Hiei's arm came down on its own, falling to clench at his side while his other hand kept Ren from falling over given its tight grasp on her wrist. When Ren came to a firm stop on her own two feet, squinting at the ground without a word, Hiei let her go free.

I started to go for Ren to hold her up if she started to fall again, but Hiei's look stopped me. He had turned my way with furious eyes, ones that booked no room for asking questions as he pivoted on his heel, tossed his head, and stalked off through the temple's open doorway. I watched him vanish into the dark interior with a pounding heart; his look had been absolutely murderous, but what in the world had _I_ done to _him_?

As if drawn to him like an iron chip to a particularly grouchy magnet, I began to follow the demon into the dark. "Ren, go to bed," I said over my shoulder.

"Where're you goin'?" she asked. "And what the hell did he just do t' me? It was like—"

"I'll explain later; just go to sleep!"

Her protests disappeared behind me; I was too busy delving deep into the temple to hear her, but it soon became apparent that I had no idea where Hiei had gone. Five minutes of wandering showed no signs of the man.

"Great," I said as I walked down a random hallway. "Great. Where the hell is he?"

Stopping to lean against a wall, I slid onto the floor and leaned my cheek against my staff. The cool comfort of it cleared my head, pushing back the whirlwind of emotion brought about by Keiko, until—

I hadn't touched my power in a while—not in the way Genkai had first showed me, at least, back when I didn't even know there was power to be had inside of me. I carefully reached inside myself to touch the warm glow of my spirit energy, feeling it and testing it before pulling it out of my with a light tug. It spread out of me in a wave, a flower opening to the sun, and—

Small bursts of colored light flared up in the darkness behind my eyes: Radiant green, cheerful orange, bubbly blue, icy white, and…

_Violet and red and black swirled into an amalgamation of heat and ferocity and the familiar lines of—_

I stood up, there in that hallway, and marched as quickly as I could toward my room, but I kept going past it and then I passed the bathroom, too, walking down the hall until just before it took a sharp veer to the left, and then final door was cold under my hand when I raised a fist and knocked—

Hiei opened the door.

For a moment, neither of us spoke. Then, however, he stood back in a clear indication that I was allowed inside. After swallowing down a lump of nerves, I stepped past him into the room beyond, taking it in with interest muted only by apprehension. His room was slightly less furnished than mine, containing a futon on the floor (though it did not appear to have been touched lately) and a bookcase with a sword on the center shelf. There was also a black chest on the floor under the window—_I knew Hiei's room would have a window,_ I thought—and a small table next to the door.

Hiei reached over and flicked on the lamp sitting on that table as he shut the door, sealing the room off from the outside. He said nothing for a few seconds, allowing me to stand in the center of his room for a good minute and a half before he spoke.

"You found me," he said.

I started to reply, but then I realized he wasn't wearing a shirt. Tanned skin, smooth, and black pants—I found myself unable to speak for a second, but then I tore my eyes away from the way his muscles rippled beneath his skin to focus only on his face, which was as blank as plain paper.

"What did you do to Ren?" I said brusquely, cutting right to the chase.

His head tilted to the side, almost imperceptibly. "What did _you_ do to Yusuke?" he countered.

His question made the guilt—guilt I had momentarily forgotten—surge up. I stared at the floor in front of me without really seeing it, wondering just how the heck I was supposed to explain what had happened to Hiei and what he might think of me afterward—

Only, I didn't have to worry. I flinched when I felt the telltale glitter of Hiei's mind nudging up against my own, but then I allowed myself to relax and sigh as he gently plucked the memory from where it had been at rest.

My relaxed moment didn't last. Soon I was having to relive each surge of emotion as Keiko told me her story, and then I had to relive how it felt to confront Yusuke and see Keiko's face when she—

"I know it wasn't my place," I blurted as the last image trickled into nothing. "I know I shouldn't have—"

"Guilt does not suit you," Hiei snapped. "It's not your fault. Keiko should not have been telling you about any of that in the first place."

I stared at him. Even though Hiei had just told me it wasn't my fault, something about his words wasn't quite right, and his face… he looked angry. Not pitying, not understanding… angry.

But why?

He knew what I was thinking without me having to say a word. "It's their business, not yours," he said, tone unforgiving. "She invited trouble the minute she told you what Yusuke did."

"She was just looking for support, Hiei," I said, but Hiei only sneered.

"He left her without a word to _protect her_," he said. "Just like you and me."

"It's nothing like you and me!" I protested. "Where the hell are you getting that?"

His scowl, if it were possible, got darker. "Remember when we made no promises to each other, since we could die tomorrow?" he asked. "Didn't Yusuke do the same thing? He spared the girl some pretty words in case he didn't make it out of that tournament alive!"

"Hiei, the sex spoke louder than anything he could have said!" I snapped.

He tossed back his head, letting a sharp bark of laughter pierce me. "If that's the case, then why did she need a goodbye as well?"

Though his point—that if sex spoke louder than words, the fact that Yusuke left without saying anything shouldn't matter—was clear and logical, but it didn't speak to the emotion of the situation, which was never logical at all.

"The point is," I said, trying to keep my cool and utterly failing, "that she let herself be vulnerable, and Yusuke never recognized that."

"So?"

"So," I said, irked by Hiei's dense thinking, "imagine if _you_ let yourself be vulnerable, and _I_ acted like it never happened. What _then_, Hiei? Put yourself in Keiko's shoes!"

My words made him go quiet, eyes hooded and dark as they tracked my face. I let him look at me for a few minutes, content to have made a point he could actually understand with so little complication, until a sudden bout of weariness made my knees go weak.

"Can I sit down?" I asked quietly.

Hiei nodded. "The trunk."

I went to it and settled in, putting my staff against the wall so I could stretch my arms and pop a crick out of my neck. Hiei made no move to come any closer, so I braced my hands against the trunk beneath me and quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Will you tell me what you wanted from Ren?" I asked.

Hiei said nothing for a second. Then: "How do you feel?"

_What the—_ "Uh, tired?" I said, confused.

This did not please Hiei. "Do you hurt anywhere?" he pressed, actually taking a step toward me. His eyes, dyed crimson since the room was only lit by one dim lamp, glittered strangely when they flickered toward my feet.

I laughed. "I'm always a little sore," I said, trying to make a joke, but Hiei didn't appear to think I was kidding at all. He crossed the room in a blur of blackened heat and was then sitting next to me and grabbing my knees in his hands, jerking my body sideways so my legs draped across his thighs. I let out a muffled yelp as he began to attack my shoelaces, making my bad foot smart when he tried to force the knots to come undone with far too much force for comfort.

"Hiei, that hurts!" I said, voice going an octave higher, and he froze with eyes fixed on my shoe. "What the heck are you trying to _do_?"

A growl rumbled in his chest, but he did not answer. Instead his fingers began to glow as if they had been stuck in a forge; the next thing I knew I smelled burning cloth and my shoelaces had been burned clean through. I gaped as Hiei carefully slipped my bad foot free of its confinement; what the hell was he _getting_ at?

"Hiei, don't look at—" I started to say as I began tugging my my leg out of his grasp (I didn't want him looking so closely at my deformity!), but hot fingers tightened on my ankle and held me immobile.

And then he actually touched my foot.

I hadn't thought anyone could touch my foot the way Ren could. She knew every angle of misshapen bone, every whorl of uneven flesh, every curve of malformed muscle, and she knew it all because she'd had practice, instruction, time to get to know it—

Hiei had had no such background. That's why I was stunned into silence when he started touching me, because he was doing it as well as—no, he was doing it _better_ than Ren.

It may have had something to do with how warm he was. I have poor circulation in that limb, so his hot hands tracing my veins and arteries… it helped the perpetually cold place feel warm again, not to mention it made the rest of me feel like melting into a little puddle of goop. I shivered when he touched sensitive spots, feeling Sweet's consciousness meld with my own as she enjoyed the sheer physical pleasure of a good massage, and each time Hiei's right hand, the _Dragon's_ hand, each time it touched me, Sweet purred.

"This was what I wanted from Ren," Hiei said. He did not look at me as he spoke, eyes narrowed as he continued touching my worst feature. "To learn how to make you feel this way."

"What way?" I asked, softly.

He didn't say anything, fingers and palms steady and strong on my skin.

I repeated: "What way, Hiei?"

It took a minute for the reply to come, but when it did… "I feel what you feel," he said, glancing quickly at the mark on my throat. "Right now, and when Ren did this… it's…"

His words faded. I could see in his eyes that his lack of articulation frustrated him, and I felt a surge of _something_ make me rise to his aid.

"At home, Hiei?" I suggested.

His fingers paused, then resumed. I sighed contentedly, watching his face.

"I feel at home when people do this for me," I said slowly, quietly, as if to an animal that might spook. "Though not when _all_ people do it. Before you, it was just Ren and my mother."

Hiei's lips tightened. "You hide this," he said, indicating my leg.

"Only from people who might not understand," I said, but Hiei shook his head.

"When you stand, you keep it begin your other leg," he said. I blinked; did I really do that? "You cover it with shoes and long pants, and when people see it, you hide it." He turned and met my eyes, fierce. "You hid it from _me_, when Ren was doing this for you."

We exchanged a long look.

"I'm not hiding now, am I?" I said.

A long moment passed. Then:

"No. You're not."

I'm not sure what it was, but something seemed to resonate in the air just then, something old and something new and something deep. I licked my dry lips, noticing with a flush that Hiei watched the motion, and I'm pretty sure he would have kissed me… had someone not picked that _exact_ moment to knock on Hiei's window.

I cursed, startled, and Hiei carefully set my leg down on the floor. His hands brushed up my jean-clad calf to my knee, the caress slow and lingering and full of promise, before the man crossed to the window and pushed it open. I kept my eyes on his bare back, heart fluttering as if my parents had just walked in on an illicit make out session.

"What do you want?" Hiei said dispassionately to the visitor. "It's late."

"Hey, Hiei," came Yusuke's voice, one that was low and without liveliness. "I was—" The detective paused. "Hey, where's your shirt? Did you get in a fight?"

Hiei snorted, then stepped aside by way of explanation. Yusuke's eyes met mine, opening wider than usual before narrowing into slits.

"Dani," he said curtly.

"Yusuke," I replied.

He looked back at Hiei. "She certainly works fast."

Hiei's eyebrows knit. "What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

Yusuke shrugged. "Oh, you know, she ruins one relationship then goes off to strip down her boyfriend. Very quick turnaround time."

"_Excuse_ you?" I said coolly.

Yusuke ignored me. "You think she'd feel a little remorse, but—"

"Enough," Hiei snapped. "What is it that you want?"

"Oh, I just wanted to ask if—" Yusuke said… but then he stopped, and I saw something inside him _click_. A slow smile made his teeth show and glimmer in the moonlight, and he tipped me an enormous wink that made my stomach tie itself in knots.

"Detective?" Hiei repeated, clearly losing his patience. "What is it that you _want_?"

Yusuke's smile turned cold. "Instead of asking me, why don't you ask _Dani_ how she knows about you and Yukina?" he said, and then the detective vanished.

* * *

NOTES: 

_Oh, Yusuke. You vindictive little bitch._

_Also, Hiei always loses his shirt in a fight, which is why Yusuke makes his comment. I found it funny? Eh heh? Ehhhh..._

_DAMMIT! I promised a ton of things for this chapter, but I didn't do Drunk Dani, or Britney Spears, or even the major joke I promised! UGH! It's just that halfway through I realized that none of those scenes could fit in due to length/time constraints, but next chapter we see both Drunk Dani AND part of the resolution to the whole KeikoxYusuke mess, plus the Britney thing as well as all that other stuff! JUST HOLD OUT UNTIL NEXT WEEK, PLEASE! Drunk Dani will be back so soon!_

_Speaking of which, Drunk Keiko, anyone? Unexpected development with the YusukexKeiko thing… it's rare that I deal with straight up sex. Sexiness, yes, but the aftermath of the actual thing… I sound like an after school special, but it can be a big deal and you shouldn't run around doing it unless you are absolutely sure it's with the right person, at the right time, and in the right part of your life to be making such decisions. As you can see, Keiko made a choice under stress and regretted it, so… be careful, everyone. At the risk of sounding like your mother, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE CAREFUL. _

_In a previous chapter, a reader expressed that Dani appeared to be familiar with alcohol despite being underage, and… well, keep in mind that she's also a college student. Stuff happens. And Ren loves to party. While underage drinking might not be a good thing, it's kind of a fact of life, so DON'T USE DANI AS A ROLE MODEL. Alcohol should be consumed responsibly and by people who are old enough to consume it! _

_That being said, the drinking game of "quarters" is real and is addicting, dangerous, and not for the faint of heart. _

_UHG, I really DO sound like y'all's MOTHERS! Don't hate me, please!_

_I have a blog-thing. Link's on the profile. It's about fanfics and writing and life. Boo-yah._

_Though my arm is not yet healed, I am happy to say that the pain has lessened considerably. Yay! Doing my hair in the morning is awkward, but other than that I've developed a fast typing technique and can keep up with my schoolwork and fanwork quite well, if I do say so myself. Which I do. Because I'm just so damn sure of myself (*sarcasm*)._

_I LOVE YOU, YOU FANTASTIC READERS, YOU! All your well-wishes are making me giddy with healing power! MusicFiend666, etowa-ru, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Ketsurui Kazutaka, MikuUchiha666, colbub, Yanza, ephemeral violet, Amore Vampiresv-v, Yoko Kiara14, lostmoonchild, hieisdarkdragonchick, nekoFlein, j.d.y., Kajihenge Yoko, unknown player, Kaiya's Watergarden, fivestepsback, Zetsubel, Mind Crush, Procrastination Possum, Kai-Chan94, archangel fighter, Eggbert3000, Reiko Tsuchikake, chocolateluvr13, Hemiola, Supreme Baka, Moldy Strawberry, OhhTaylorJade, Takara Rose Oizumi, Favorite Character, Goddess of the Sun, moani-sama, Goodbye Darling, nao-chan, Cheshire Blue Kitten, Tally Youngblood, Extreme Nerd27, Sora Matasuki, Caralirani, Kaelyn Marie, rain chant, XxXfiction, Teacup Kitty, Michelle Mi-chan D, nani san, Ellie, heve-chan, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Koryu Elric!_


	67. Chapter 67: Blame It On the Alcohol

Future Talk

Chapter 67:

"Blame It (On the Alcohol)"

* * *

Hiei's a hot guy—literally. He can turn a room into a sauna with the merest flex of his power, but right then, the room felt like it had been carved out of ice.

_Lots_ of ice.

I didn't quite dare to move as Hiei slowly shut the window, bracing his hands on the sill so he could lean close to the glass. Breath fogged the surface up; I watched the mist spread, anchoring my entire being on the vapor because I felt like the rest of the world could fall apart at any moment, and even something as tremulous as Hiei's fogging breath had more stability than I did.

I was in deep, deep trouble. I knew that better than I knew my own name.

When Hiei finally turned, I met his eyes without cringing, because I'd realized by that point that this situation was not something I could ever hope to avoid, so why even bother? We stared each other down for what felt like hours, his face bearing no expression at all; I couldn't get a handle on his emotions no matter how hard I tried, not even when his mouth twitched at the corners and parted just enough for him to breathe the words: "What does he mean?"

I swallowed down a nervous bark of laughter. Doubtless, Hiei didn't find this situation at all funny. I didn't want to dig myself into an ever deeper hole.

His hands left the windowsill as he slowly, ever so slowly, turned his entire body my way. When I did not offer him any sort of verbal explanation (and I'm sure my face just looked a cross between scared and hysteric, which was probably even more frustrating) he pinned me with a glare and took a step toward my spot on the trunk.

"What," he repeated, "did the detective _mean_?"

I said nothing.

Hiei took another step. Before long he was looming over me, staring down his nose as if he were trying to _intimidate_ the words out of my mouth by sheer force of his very forceful will.

And it nearly worked, too—almost.

"I'm not sure what he meant," I said, each word as carefully clipped as an emperor's favorite garden. "What _is_ there between you and Yukina?"

Despite being so neutral, those words were _exactly_ the wrong thing to say. Hiei made a sound that seemed a cross between a roar and a growl, hands slamming flat-palmed onto the wall on either side of my head as he lurched down to my level and stared me straight in the eye, scarlet flashing like blood as moonlight caught his iris and made it strike like flinted sparks.

Hiei, did not, however, say anything after that outburst. He just stared at me, nose brushing mine every time he moved forward when he exhaled, breath misting over my mouth and cheeks in hot waves. I blinked rapidly and tried not to look guilty, feeling sweat bead on my temple and roll down it as I tried as hard as I could to keep my gaze steady, unassuming, and free of anything that might give me away.

Inside, however, my mind raced—and as I thought of a dozen inane ways to get out of this situation, ways that were outlandish and tricky and not helpful at all… I realized that none of them would work.

And then I realized something else. Something wonderful.

None of my excuses _had_ to work.

A smile slipped through my carefully controlled mask at that point, but I stifled it quickly. Still, Hiei's eyes flickered toward my mouth before coming back up to my eyes, and when I didn't say anything he let out a low, gravely sound of displeasure.

"Dani," he rasped, "what do you _know_?"

This time I let my smile actually show. "Know?" I said, drawing out the moment just a bit (because it wasn't often I could see Hiei sweat). "Know what?"

Hiei's teeth ground together so hard that I could actually hear them groan. The hands on the wall dug into the plaster with a crack, flakes of dust puffing out to fly into my eyes.

"I can _feel_ you hiding it," he said as I tried to blink the dust out of my lashes. "You can't hide _anything_ from me with that mark on your throat!"

"Then I guess I _won't_ hide anything from you," I said, craning my head imperiously. "Is that what you want? For me to tell you everything I know, just like that?"

Hiei said nothing. He just swallowed.

_Perfect, he's nervous,_ I thought with glee. _Finally, I have the perfect opportunity to prove—without _any_ shadow of _any_ doubt—that I'm from another world, and Hiei is on the edge of his seat waiting for me to tell him… this is going to be good!_

And so I opened my mouth to tell him the truth, because this was my longed-for chance to prove my alternate universe story—

—but then I saw Hiei's eyes, I mean I really _saw_ them, and I stopped.

I'm not sure how I can even hope to explain what I saw in Hiei's eyes just then. So many emotions swirled around and around with one another, anger mixing with trepidation even as hurt wage war with fear—

Because, I realized with a mental jolt, _that_ was what I saw filling up his eyes the most: Fear.

Fear.

Hiei, my brave and callous dark knight who cared as much for morality as he did candy canes… was _scared_.

Hiei was… scared.

Why the hell was he _scared_?

Slowly, unsure of myself even though I knew not why, I closed my mouth. I stared at Hiei for a long moment, unable to comprehend why he was looking at me with such a vulnerable expression, and then I mentally kicked myself for stopping in the middle of my confession. What the hell was I hesitating for? I mean, this was _the_ perfect opportunity, wasn't it? I knew everything about everyone—everyone from Hiei to Yukina to Kurama—without ever having been told, which meant the story about me being from another world was true since my knowledge gave me the perfect opportunity to explain about the anime in the other world—

_Wait_.

My brow furrowed as I dropped my eyes to my lap, losing sight of Hiei's earnest face as something big, as something _huge_ occurred to me:

_Simply knowing things about Hiei and the others was _not_ true proof that I was from another world. _

I couldn't help but gasp, at that. Why hadn't I seen it before?

Hiei might think that the Beasts had _planted_ his back-story in my brain in the form of my world's Yu Yu Hakusho anime, and if I left the part about the anime out, he might think that I learned about his connection to Yukina through the Beasts as they attempted to masquerade as the all-knowing Koenma (because he sure as _hell_ would know everything about everyone), so—

_So just knowing about Hiei's connection to Yukina won't be enough to convince him of my story,_ I thought with dawning apprehension. _Just knowing isn't enough—I need actually proof._

_But what if I tell him everything I know about Kurama being Yoko Kurama, as well? If I know about that, too…_

But that wouldn't be enough either, I realized then. Nothing would. Hiei would rant and rave about how the Beasts told me those secrets to get me to believe the other-world story, and then he'd get mad that I already knew about the dark past of his that I'd told him didn't matter to me…

_Oh no._

Because it _would_ matter to Hiei—of that I had no doubt. I had told him, back when we talked just before he marked me, that he could be honest about his past because I wouldn't judge him for it, but wouldn't he consider those words to be empty if I already knew about the past I claimed to be so unaware and accepting of?

My blood ran cold.

My words… they _were_ empty, if he knew that the promises I made had already been fulfilled without his knowledge.

My head jerked up sharply; Hiei pulled back a bit, searching my face for answers as the fear in his eyes increased all the more.

_He'd feel so betrayed,_ I thought. _After all, he's only just begun to open up to me._

While he hadn't exactly spelled out the story of his life down to the letter, he had gone so far as to tell me about being ousted from his homeland, and considering just how private a person Hiei was…

_If he knew that I knew everything about him, about all the murders he's committed and the horrible things he's done,_ I thought as I stared into his unfathomable scarlet eyes, _he might be happy, knowing that I chose him despite his past. _

_But…_

_Would he be happy if he knew I hadn't learned about him… _from_ him? _

I knew the answer to that as instinctively as I knew how to breathe.

_No, _I thought._ He'd hate me for that. Learning about him from an outside party would be meaningless. I've been working so hard to gain his trust, I've been working on getting to know him and on getting him to open up to me, and I've gotten so far on getting him to trust me and touch me and maybe even _love_ me—_

My breath hitched and stopped, shuddering back to a start with a rattle and a hiss. Hiei saw that and leaned closer, his own breath coming a little faster as we stared each other down.

_But if I go through with this… if I go through with telling him that I know about the past I swore to accept, but _only_ when he was _ready_ to tell me about it… all that work will have been for nothing._

_Months of careful advances, little moments of connection, small touches and times of trust… wasted._

I swallowed at the unquestionable realization, nervous and with a lump growing large in my throat. There was no way I could tell him that I knew his secrets because he was from a TV show, no way in _hell_, which left me the only option of—

_He can't know that I know about his past, or _anyone's_ past._

I swallowed again, and found the action a touch more difficult.

_I have to lie to Hiei. That's the only way._

"Dani," Hiei said.

The sound of my name startled me out of my reflective trance. "Hm?" I grunted, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear nervously. "What?"

"You've been staring at me for five minutes," Hiei said without inflection, though with no less emotion boiling inside his pupils. "What are you thinking?"

Stalling for time felt natural at that point (I didn't yet have a lie to tell him) so I stalled. "You mean you can't tell through the mark?" I asked, touching the fading wound with a fingertip. "I thought you could feel everything through it."

I punctuated my words with a caress that followed the mark's curve, tracing the upraised scar tissue with a long, drawn-out sweep of skin against skin.

Hiei, to my astonishment and despite the intensity of the moment, closed his eyes when a small tremor made his body quiver. Voice low and soft despite his naturally harsh tone, eyes dark and light all at the same time, he said: "I don't hear thoughts through that mark."

"But I thought—"

"I taste your emotions," he said, cutting me off. His pupils widened, then contracted, and the intensity in his gaze stilled me firmly in place. "I sense _what_ you feel, not the why or the how of it."

His hand came up, a single finger hooking over my palm so he could tug down my hand and stop me from touching the mark. I shivered when he did that because the heat of his skin washed over me in a wave, beating back the room's chill the way a light beats back the dark.

"Thoughts frame emotion," he said, hand on mine when he rested it on my knee, voice rasping a little more than normal. "What I feel from you is raw, and unlabeled. _You_ must tell me the 'why' of your emotions, yourself."

We stared at one another for a long moment. I looked away first, pulling my hand out from under his so I could start fiddling with the hem of my shirt as my nerves made me grow restless. His hand lingered on my knee before taking its old place on the wall.

"I don't know what to think," I blurted, mind racing over what to say. "I mean, I thought one thing, but now, I was just thinking, and I don't know if I'm right—"

"What are you talking about?"

"About you and Yukina," I said.

His eyes grew hard.

"It's just, Yusuke started talking about you in front of her, and then he got all awkward because… well… I just thought…"

"You thought what?" he said, deadly quiet and utterly still. "What did you think?"

"Well," I said, and because I still didn't have any good excuses I just started babbling off the facts. "Sometimes I catch you looking at her."

Time seemed to slow.

Hiei whispered: "Looking?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Looking. But, but not when she's _speaking_ or anything, it's when we're just sitting around, you know?" I shrugged, helpless because I had no idea what I was getting at. "You stare at her when you think no one's watching, but I look at you a lot so I noticed, and…"

His reply came so softly I could hardly hear it. "And?" he said.

"And, and you go easy on her," I said, grasping at straws. "The first time I got drunk, she was responsible, but you didn't even _snap_ at her and if it had been _Kuwabara_, for instance—"

"I would have called him a buffoon," Hiei quietly admitted, and he began to scowl. "That was sloppy of me."

I met his eyes, then, and saw that they were full of resignation, fear having abated when it became apparent I knew more than I should. I rolled my lips together to wet them, nerves making my pulse pound, and all of a sudden I had come up with a lie so impromptu that even _I_ was surprised to hear myself say it.

"I know… I know you're in love with Yukina," I blurted, words tasting as acrid as the smell of rain in my mouth, and I waited for Hiei to respond.

* * *

Did you know that Hiei does a really good impression of a statue?

Well, he does, and right then he could have given Michelangelo's _David_ a run for its sculptural money. His eyes opened wider than I had _ever_ seen, bar nothing, and his muscles first went utterly slack with surprise followed by them tensing up so completely that I thought his bones might snap under the pressure. Lips parted and stayed that way; eyebrows rose and locked into a position that told me my lie had caught him so unaware that even making a denial had become an impossible feat.

Clearly, Hiei had not been expecting me to say that.

And so I waited. And waited. But I didn't have to wait too much longer (and a good thing, too, because I had begun to hold my breath) because Hiei pushed away from me with a flex of his already taut arms, stood upright, and stumbled—actually _stumbled_—back a step.

"It's OK, Hiei," I said, forcing the words out even as I forced a hysterical laugh back inside my chest. "You've known her longer than me and Kuwabara seems to have a claim on her, so just as long as you don't cheat on me or anything—"

Mention of the human's name made a spark of annoyance flash across Hiei's face, and that emotion seemed to release whatever hold my words had had on him. He drew himself up to his full height with blazing eyes and clenched fists, mouth twisting with revulsion mixed with pure and unadulterated certainty.

"I am _not_ in love with Yukina!" he said, words all adrip with scorn and horror and _are you stupid?_ "How could you even _suggest_ something like that? I had thought you were vastly more intelligent than you just proved yourself to be!"

I threw up my hands, staring at him with my mouth open. "Well, what am I supposed to suggest?" I snapped, genuinely disliking the words and looks Hiei was giving me. "You _do_ stare at her a lot, I mean it's kind of hard to not notice when you have eyes like—_oh_."

Realizing that I had just stumbled onto the perfect segue way to the _true_ truth, I allowed my expression to turn to one befitting a person having an epiphany (one of which I kind of was having considering how uncannily neatly I had played that moment, so the emotion behind the look was authentic, if not for the right reasons).

"Oh," I repeated. "_Oh_."

"What?" Hiei said. "What are you thinking? It had better be less idiotic than thinking I was _in love_ with—"

"She's your… you're related somehow, aren't you?"

_That_ made him stop berating me mid-sentence. He breathed deeply through his nose, seeming to writhe beneath his skin in agitation, and when he said nothing…

"You _are_," I said. "I mean, she's not old enough to be your mom, so… cousin? Sister?"

It took him a long time to spit out: "Sister."

I let that sink in.

"Before anyone told me Kurama was a demon, I thought all demons had red eyes, after seeing just you and Yukina," I said slowly. "But Kurama's are green and the Sisters' are all black, so… the red eyes must run in the family. Right?"

Hiei didn't respond, face drawn in on itself like a deflated balloon.

"And your hair," I continued. "I mean, you both have blue hair even if the shading is…" My eyes went wide. "And your necklace, when Yukina cries she makes—"

"Enough," Hiei snapped.

"I can't believe I didn't _notice_—"

"_Stop_!" He turned away, hands going deep into his pockets with teeth bared in a vicious snarl. "Don't breathe a word of this to _anyone_, understand?"

"Why not?" I asked petulantly. "I mean, it's obvious Yusuke knows, but why did you hide it from _me_?" I paused to let that question resonate, then asked: "And earlier, Yusuke obviously wanted to keep from talking about you in front of Yukina, which means…"

"She doesn't know and she _never will_," Hiei snapped.

_That's what you think,_ I thought, but I merely said: "Fine. My lips are sealed."

Hiei did not reply.

"… though can I ask why she doesn't know?"

"Have you _met her_?" Hiei asked harshly. "Can you imagine an innocent like her finding out her brother is a _felon_?"

I shrugged. "I don't mind your criminal record so much. What makes you think _she_ will?"

Hiei once again said nothing.

"Oh, so you can defile _me_ with your touch, but not _her_, huh?" I asked, voice laced through with ample amounts of sarcasm. "That's sure nice of you."

"You don't understand anything," Hiei hissed.

"Damn right I don't," I said primly. "And she's not as innocent as you think she is."

The statement that earned me a horrible look of doubt and dread and dismissal.

"Oh, don't give me that," I told him. "I had a long talk with Yukina a while ago, and _trust_ me, have you seen the way she's been acting around Kuwabara lately?"

Hiei gave me a slow nod. "She's been avoiding him."

"Yeah, and she's doing it on _purpose_, just so she can hurt him so he won't come near her anymore." I shrugged a little, not acknowledging the way Hiei's eyes had widened. "She doesn't want him to get hurt on her account, so she's playing the bitch card knowing damn well she's hurting him. I mean, it's for his own good and stuff, but—"

"Even when she hurts people, she's good," Hiei countered. "She's been looking for me. I'd only disappoint her."

I quirked an eyebrow. "And here I thought you were a brave one."

"What in the world is _that_ supposed to mean?"

I stood up, reaching for my staff and taking it in my hand. The smooth surface was a comfort.

"It means, I didn't know you were scared of rejection, Hiei," I said, and before he could protest I had started for the door, saying: "I'm going to find Ren and put her to bed. If it turns out I've already met your grandfather or something, let me know in the morning, all right?"

Hiei did not follow me into the hall (my heart was pounding loud enough for him to track me from miles away, I was sure), nor did he attempt to stop me when I headed to my room and opened the door (though I totally expected him to considering that I had pretty much just called him a coward and stormed out). I poked my head into the room slowly, using the light from the hall to figure out if Ren had made it into bed on her own or not.

To my surprise, she had somehow made it back. She had collapsed on her belly on my futon and was clutching my pillow to her chest, snoring softly as her eyes shifted behind her lids. Dreaming no doubt of flying with the powers she could recover with the proper training, occasionally her arms would twitch as if she were trying to brace herself in a face-forward fall, but no such fall ever came.

I suppressed a laugh, one that felt forced considering how jumpy I was after so narrowly dodging a bullet with Hiei. Quietly, so as not to wake my friend, I changed out of my day clothes and put on a pair of shorts and a tank top; with equal softness I picked my way over Ren's sprawled body and onto her abandoned futon. I flicked off the light on the way over, plunging the room into total black.

Ren's snorted harshly when I set my staff down on the floor next to the futon, bone meeting wood with a small clack before it rolled off somewhere in the dark.

"Dani," she mumbled. Cloth rustled when she moved. "Dan… i."

"I'm here," I said quietly.

She sighed. "Pillow smells… like you," she said, and her snores picked back up as if the exchange had never taken place.

After a moment, I replied: "Sweet dreams."

I lay there listening to her breathe for a few minutes, curled up on my side and shivering. The room was cold, _really_ cold, I guess I had taken Hiei's heat for granted, and despite how Sweet purred a measure of warmth into me from her spot in my soul, I was still somewhat uncomfortable—_too_ uncomfortable, in fact, to actually sleep. I tossed and turned, unable to find a decent position on the firm futon, and my head kept feeling these weird little pokes when I moved—

It was only when something plant-like flew into my mouth when I inhaled did I realize that I hadn't taken Botan's flowers from my hair. I sat up and reached behind my head, gently attempting to tug a bloom out of my braid only to have the stem snarl firmly in place.

"Shit," I muttered. I slowly got to my feet and fumbled for my staff in the dark, but when I couldn't find it I reached toward where I knew my rocking horse stood and found my white sword-cane, the one Koenma had given me before my trip to Demon World and the one I hadn't used since I got my staff. It still fit my height perfectly so I didn't much mind using it (it was actually easier on my shoulder than the staff, to tell the truth) in order to get safely out of the room and into the hallway beyond.

I met no one during my walk to the bathroom, nor did I meet anyone when I stood at the mirrors above the sinks and cautiously pulled a fist-sized mound of flowers out of my braid. I re-tied the hair when I was through and carefully placed the flowers in a twist of tissue paper so I could save them for maybe one more day, and then I began to head out again.

This time, however, I actually did run into someone. This 'someone' happened to be Kuwabara.

"Hey, I thought you might be up still," the psychic said when I walked into the hall. He wore heart-patterned boxers and an undershirt, looking comical and relaxed. "What's going on?"

His voice made me start. "Oh, hi," I sighed as he strode over to me. "Just getting ready for bed."

He cracked a big, regretful smile. "Aw, really?" he asked. "I can't sleep, so I was wondering if you'd like to go talk for a bit?"

For a second I was tempted to say no, but then I realized that I wasn't all that sleepy (adrenaline still made my muscles quiver with pent up energy) and felt myself relent. "Sure," I said, nodding as I gestured with the flowers in my hand. "Just let me put these up."

"OK." Brown eyes lit up. "And hey, wanna bring your ukulele?"

"Won't it wake people up?"

He rolled his eyes. "Nah. Everyone's either drunk, exhausted, or still up."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. Yukina and Botan finally got Keiko into bed and then went to sleep themselves, and Kurama and Genkai went to sleep, too, and Hiei…" He scratched the back of his neck slowly. "Well, you, Hiei, Ren, and Yusuke I wasn't too sure about. That's why I came looking, though I wanted to find you more than Ren since talking to her is kind of hard, so…"

"Ren's asleep," I assured him. "Totally passed out drunk, in fact, and I just saw Hiei—he's awake. Oh, and Yusuke probably is, too. I just saw him about a quarter hour ago."

"Oh." Kuwabara's face took on a very particular shade of concern. "How'd _that_ go?"

I sighed. "Not well. He tried to start a fight between me and Hiei."

"Ouch. Payback's a bitch, huh?"

"I guess. Hiei and I are fine now, though, I think, so…"

Kuwabara half-smiled, with pity. "You know," he said thoughtfully, "from what I overheard, it seemed like you had a really good point to make with Yusuke. He _does_ take advantage of Keiko."

I began to preen a bit, but then Kuwabara kept talking.

"But Dani, you yelled at him in front of _everybody_," he said. "I know you were mad and tipsy and not thinking straight, but that was crossing a line."

Guilt—the same crippling guilt I had felt earlier and subsequently managed to push into the far recesses of my distracted mind—returned in full force. My neck drooped, head dropping forward so my braid flopped onto my chest.

"You should probably say sorry, at some point," Kuwabara said. "If not for what you said, then at least for the way you said it."

"I know," I said. "I feel awful about it."

He put a sympathetic hand on my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. "You'll have a chance to see him tomorrow," he said. "For now, why don't you meet me in the big tea room, the one with the fireplace. We can just relax and stuff, maybe talk about what you should say to Yusuke."

I couldn't help but smile softly. "Thank, Kuwabara. You're a great friend."

We parted ways at that point, Kuwabara heading to the tea room while I went to put away the flowers and fetch my ukulele. I also made a point of putting on a pair of sweatpants and donning a zip-up hoodie over my pajamas, because I didn't want to hang out in just shorts when it was this chilly.

As I was putting on the aforementioned pants over my short-shorts, I tapped into my power on a whim and began stretching it out as far as I could. I quickly caught glimpses of undulating green as Kurama slept, and then the quiet roar of Hiei's black spark, and Kuwabara's homey orange glitter—

"He's outside," I muttered into the dark when I realized I had found Yusuke in the form of a raging cobalt bonfire. His energy felt awake, and agitated, and…

I left the room feeling warmer, but also more nervous. I went down the hall as quickly as I could, but instead of turning in the direction of the tea room, I went outside and onto the porch where I immediately began to shiver as the wind stripped by. Walking along the porch took me around the temple, to the courtyard where Bob the Monk statue stood in the middle of his patch of tall grass, and as I turned the corner I saw exactly who I had been looking for.

My left hand tightened on my cane; my right tightened on the neck of my ukulele. Yusuke did not acknowledge my presence as he caressed the side of Puu's neck, the pair of them standing quietly in the middle of the courtyard as Puu burbled sadly in the spirit detective's ear. The beast stood behind Yusuke, but his head had snaked over Yusuke's shoulder and was resting lightly next to his jaw. I didn't say anything for a moment; just watching them commune with one another was enough for the time being. Yusuke's face was drawn and pinched, Puu's eyes sad and lonely, and as I took in their defeated postures I once again felt horrible, insistent guilt wash over me.

"Hey," I said at last. "What are you doing awake at this hour?"

Yusuke's eyes did not open; Puu's did, black eyes shining luminously in the moonlight as he stared my way. Though I was about thirty feet from them since I was on the porch, I could still see that Puu wasn't exactly happy to see me, but…

"How'd your chat with Hiei go, huh?" Yusuke asked. His hand went up and touched Puu's beak, as if to steady himself on his companion. "Are you and I _both_ single now?"

I suppressed a wince. "No," I said stiffly. "No, it's just you."

This time, Yusuke did open his eyes; he seemed perplexed. "How'd you get out of _that_ one?" he asked. "Hiei's crazy about that secret."

"I just told him what I thought I knew," I said, because that was mostly the truth. "He can't blame me for being observant."

Yusuke snorted, shutting his eyes again. "Observant. Right. You're as dumb as I am."

Instead of rising to his bait, I said what I was really thinking, which was: "Thank you."

This seemed to catch him unawares, because his lips thinned and he looked at me in utter bamboozlement. I just shrugged, offering him a small smile.

"I don't think you're dumb," I said. "So, if I'm as dumb as you, that means I'm not dumb at all. So thank you."

He seemed uncertain of this (I mean, it wasn't like too many people were in the habit of calling him smart, so…), and since a little flattery couldn't hurt anything…

"I mean, you're not like _Kurama_ or anything," I said, "but you're intuitive in your own way. Maybe you don't make the best choices, but your heart's in the right place… I think… and anyway, I'd take that over being a genius any day of the week." I laughed a little. "But that's not the point. I really need to talk you."

This brought out a scowl. "I dunno, Dani," he said, voice laced with sarcasm. "The last time you said you needed to talk to me, my girlfriend—"

"Yusuke, I'm _sorry_."

He stopped talking, him and Puu both staring with dark eyes dyed darker by the night.

"What I did was wrong," I said, taking a dozen or steps closer to him, steps that carried me down the porch's three small steps and onto the stone ground. "I was trying to be a good friend to Keiko but I did it in the totally wrong way. I shouldn't have butted in because it was none of my business, but what she said really _got_ to me and I wasn't thinking straight because I was angry, and I am so, _so sorry_ that I called you out in front of all those people, and—"

"Dani," Yusuke said.

I kept going like I hadn't heard. "—and it will never happen again, OK? I mean it, your business with Keiko is _your_ business with Keiko, and—"

"Dani, shut UP!"

I bit my tongue in my haste to comply with Yusuke, who had shoved away from Puu with a snarl. The detective's fists were clenched at his sides and shaking, teeth bared behind his grimacing lips as his feet spread in a steady, uncompromising stance.

"I'm not pissed because you _yelled_ at me," he snapped, and after struggling to speak for a second he dropped to his knees so he could pound a fist onto the cobblestones, stones that cratered under the tremendous force of the blow.

"I'm pissed because—well goddammit, Dani, you were _right_!" he said through a cloud of stone dust, and he stood up so he could turn away and thread his fingers through his hair. "Goddammit, what the _fuck_?"

I didn't say anything, stunned as I was, because Yusuke had started whirling and pacing as whatever was building inside him tried to claw its way out of his inarticulate mouth.

"That night, the night we, _you know_, I just wanted to comfort her," he spat. "She said she wanted to, but then, after, I just thought—I saw her next to me, all asleep and, and I thought, 'what if I don't come back, what then? She'll remember this and it'll hurt her, and—'"

Puu warbled, stretching out his neck to nuzzle Yusuke, but Yusuke shoved the bird off and kept pacing.

"Having sex with her was a mistake," he said, face twisted with regret, "so I thought, 'hey, if I leave and disappoint her, and then I _die_, at least she won't be _too_ sad,' so I just got up and left! I thought that if her last memory of me was happy she'd just hurt more if I died, so I tried to make it so she'd not _miss me_ just in case!"

"But you _did_ come back, Yusuke," I said, thinking: _He's sounds so much like Yukina towards Kuwabara that it's scary._

Yusuke stopped pacing when I said that, all the anger draining from him like water out of a sieve. With a strangled yell he sat down on the ground, knees bent so he could hang his head between them.

"I didn't know what to say to her," he said, grabbing his head in his shaking hands. "I just didn't know what to say, and when she didn't bring up me leaving her, I just thought she was OK with everything, that there wasn't a problem and—"

"But there _was_ a problem," I said. I rushed over to him and sat down on the stones facing his direction, trying to get him to look at me by touching the toe of his shoe with my fingertips. "Ignoring it didn't make it go away. If anything, it hurt things even worse. Keiko's been agonizing over it ever since it happened, and—"

"You don't think I know that, now?" Yusuke yelled, jerking his foot away from me as he glared.

"Well, you wouldn't have known _at all_ had I not said something!" I yelled back. "The only reason I yelled at you in the first place was because Keiko wasn't _ever_ going to say anything for herself!"

"And what would have been so bad about that?" Yusuke wanted to know.

"What, you _want_ your girlfriend to resent you for taking her virginity and then acting like it never happened?" I asked coldly, and although Yusuke stared at me in horror, I was far from done. "You _want_ to be the one to have tainted what should have been a wonderful memory of hers? Every time the two of you have sex, you _want_ her to think about the first time you did it, and then think about what happened after, and _then_ have to hold back _tears_? Because that's going to be a major mood-killer one of these days, trust me." I let out a sigh crossed with a scream of frustration and threw up my hands. "Look, I'm sorry I caused problems for you and Keiko, but now you know where you stand and now you have a chance to _fix it_! You shouldn't be focusing on how you fucked up in the past—you should be thinking of ways to make it right, right _now_!"

He processed this, lips firming into a thin line. "And how the hell am I supposed to do that?" he asked.

"You could start by apologizing to her, dumbass," I said. "Did that option not ever occur to you?"

He scoffed, but only because he was feeling uncomfortable. "It did, but what should I even _say_?" he asked me, grumpy tone suggesting that Yusuke was getting more than a little frustrated. "I'm terrible at talking about my feelings and shit—how the hell am I supposed to handle _Keiko's_ in this situation when I can barely even handle _mine_?"

On reflex, I lashed out and grabbed one of his hands so I could squeeze it. Yusuke stared at the contact as if he had just been latched onto by a jellyfish, but I did not let go and waited for him to make eye contact.

"There's this saying where I come from," I said, holding his gaze as firmly as I could. "It's that if you can't fly, you run, and if you can't run, you crawl."

"But where am I even crawling _to_?" he moaned.

"I wasn't finished, Yusuke."

He looked at me. I looked at him. Puu looked between us slowly, until I found the words inside me and finally brought them out into the world

"If you can't crawl," I told Yusuke, "then you find someone to carry you." I patted his hand and smiled a little. "Now, I might not be the strongest person you know, but I _do_ have quite the arsenal of canes if you'd like to borrow one to lean on."

He stared at me, mouth dropping open just the smallest bit. "You mean," he said with dawning apprehension, "you mean you're going to _help me _get Keiko back?"

"I'm going to try," I said. "It's the least I can do, and I think I know Keiko pretty well after talking with her tonight, and after talking with her the night Puu took us, so…"

"So you're like a double agent," he said slowly, but then excitement sparked inside him and he started grinning. "You're going to figure out what she needs, and you're going to tell me so I can do it to get her back!"

"More or less, yeah."

His grin widened all the more, but then it turned quite sly. "But before I forgive you and recruit you as an ally," he said, "I need one promise from you."

_Why do I not like the sound of this?_ I thought. "… does it involve blood?" I asked suspiciously. "Because if it does—"

Yusuke laughed. "I'll try to not make it about blood, but if I'm going to trust you to help me, I want you to owe me a favor."

I blinked at him. "Wait, a _what_?

"A favor," he repeated. "I want you to owe me a favor."

"Why?"

"Because I need to know that you won't turn on me," he said. "If there's a maybe-terrible favor looming over your head, I can guarantee that you won't do anything I don't like." He pretended to look forlorn, damn him and his puppy eyes. "And since you yelled at me, I don't know if I can trust you…"

I thought about that for a minute. I really, _really_ wanted to be on Yusuke's good side again—God knew I wanted Yu Yu Hakusho's only real canon pairing to get back together—and I wanted him to be able to trust me again…

"… just _one_ favor?" I said slowly.

A vigorous nod. "Just one."

"And can I ask for something in return?"

"Maybe."

"Can you promise not to try and sabotage my relationship with Hiei again?"

He pouted. "But it's just so fun!"

I glared. "Yusuke…"

He smirked, but then he looked a little regretful. "Sorry about that, by the way," he said. "I was mad at you, and… well, I just…"

"It's totally fine, OK?" I said. "Just so long as you promise not to do it again."

His smile was enough promise, but he still said: "OK. I'll be careful."

"Then I guess we have a deal." I shook Yusuke's hand. "But at least try not to make my favor _too_ embarrassing, OK?"

"I make no promises."

"Damn."

And thus, an unlikely alliance—one based on mutual guilt, mismatched trust, and uncertain threats—was born.

A part of me hope Keiko would survive the oncoming onslaught of good intentions, no matter how misguided they might turn out to be.

* * *

Kuwabara was jamming to a song on the radio—the same radio Kenichi had earlier given me; so _that's_ where it had gone!—when Yusuke and I walked into the tearoom. Kuwabara looked up from his air-drumming and stared at us with wide eyes, slowly pointing first at me, and then at Yusuke, before taking down a huge gulp of air.

"We've reached an understanding," Yusuke said loftily before he sat next to Kuwabara at the room's only kotatsu (which also happened to be one of the ones we had picnicked on). "And now Dani owes me a favor, so I guess that's kind of cool."

"Are you sure that's wise, Dani?" Kuwabara asked, shooting me a sidelong glance. "I mean… Yusuke is…"

"I don't want to think about my impending death, thanks," I deadpanned as I sat down, too, in the seat that made me sit with my back to the door.

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "Big baby."

"Jerk."

Kuwabara looked between us some more, still unsure of where the two of us stood. Then he finally asked: "So this… understanding, of yours. What's it like?"

I looked at Yusuke; he looked at me.

"Well," I said slowly, "I've agreed to help Yusuke get Keiko back so long as he doesn't stay mad at me."

"And Dani owes me a favor for embarrassing me in public," Yusuke added.

I did a double take. "Wait, does that mean you're going to use the favor in order to embarrass _me_ in public?" I asked, aghast. "That wasn't in our bargain!"

"What bargain?"

The three of us jumped, swiveling toward the door to see Hiei standing in it. He had finally put on a shirt, but he lacked shoes and was frowning at us in a way that suggested he wasn't happy about something.

My heart beat a little quicker at the thought. Was he still mad about me called him out on being scared? Hiei hated to be thought of as—

"Dani's agreed to help me get Keiko back, since she's the one that screwed up the relationship in the first place," Yusuke said, grinning at Hiei as the fire demon shut the sliding door to the room behind him. "Great, right?"

"What _bargain_?" Hiei repeated. He slid down the wall to the left of the door and sat, one leg stretch out along the floor with his elbow propped on his bent knee.

I twisted to look at the kotatsu again, Hiei at my back. Yusuke said: "She owes me a favor, that's all."

Hiei growled: "What kind of favor?"

Yusuke snorted, meeting my eyes with a grin. "Nothing _you_ need to worry about, short stuff. I'll keep it clean."

"You'd better," said Hiei with a growl.

I pillowed my head on the table. "Thank _god_."

"All of you, shut up!" Kuwabara said suddenly. He cranked the volume on the radio. "I love this song!"

The song in question happened to be a country song with a bouncing rhythm not unfit for dancing and a smooth-voiced male singer, one that reminded me of…

_Weird,_ I thought as Kuwabara began air-drumming again, face contorted into a happily spastic grin_, this singer sounds a lot like… what was his name, Luke something?_

Though I was hazy on the singer's name, I was not hazy on his most famous song. I picked up ukulele and quietly began playing a few chords under the table, leaning down to hear them above the sound of the radio.

"Hey, cut that out!" Kuwabara snapped.

I threw up my hands, leaving the instrument on my lap. "Sheesh!" I said. "You must really love this song!"

Kuwabara nodded emphatically and continued to drum. Yusuke, meanwhile, joined in with an air guitar, but I ignored them both in favor of taking off my sweatshirt, something I didn't really need thanks to the kotatsu's built-in heater. I folded it and took my time straightening the sleeves as the boys continued their little dances, and when the song finally faded a few minutes later Kuwabara switched off the radio with a sigh.

"Sumizu Nobu is _awesome_," he said to me. "He's been tearing up the country charts lately—he mixes dance music and country music which is totally cool, you know?"

"I'm familiar with the genre, yeah," I said as I picked up my ukulele. I strummed an experimental chord and began singing tentatively, _"Shake it for the young bucks sittin' in the honky tonk, for the rednecks rockin' til the break of dawn…"_

Kuwabara frowned, head titling to the side as I played through the chorus of "Country Girl (Shake It for Me)" by Luke Bryan. When I was done, Kuwabara sat there in silence for a second, as if he was replaying the song in head.

"Sounds really weird on a ukulele," he said, eyes screwed up in thought. "Maybe on a guitar…"

"The real song has an electric, an acoustic, a bass, drums, some fiddle work, and a banjo," I told him. "It's a lot more full and poppy. If you liked what was on the radio, then this'll be great, I think."

"It's a little too late for loud music, or I'd ask you to play it with your power," he said. "Tomorrow, though…"

"I'd love to show you, yeah."

Yusuke frowned, hand supporting his head as he put his elbow on the table. "Hey Dani," he said while looking thoughtfully at the ukulele in my hands, "do you think singing a song for Keiko could get her to like me again?"

I looked at him in surprise. "Why, did you write one for her? I didn't know you were musical."

He shrugged. "_I'm_ not, but _you_ are. If you translate one of your American songs…"

The idea was OK, but not one I was really all that comfy with to be honest. "It might be better if you actually put _yourself_ into a song you write yourself—" I said, but then Yusuke's face started to fall and I amended my words with: "—but if you like I can at least play a few songs for you to choose from tomorrow. If I give you the tune, you could think up your own words or something."

The thought of writing poetry appeared to embarrass the detective. He began blushing, ears going as red as tomatoes beneath his tan. "Oh, forget it," he grumbled. "I'd have to be drunk to do something like that, anyway."

Kuwabara beamed at him in triumph. "That can be arranged!" he said gleefully, and to my horror he pulled a six-pack of beer out from under the kotatsu.

"Where'd you get _that_?" I asked as he pulled out a bottle and an opener and handed it to Yusuke.

"Just grabbed it before I went inside," he chortled. "Here, Dani, you want one?"

I took the beer from him with a grimace and glanced at Yusuke. "I dunno, man. Getting tipsy earlier resulted in a breakup; maybe I—"

"Oh, c'mon," Yusuke chided. "Live a little."

"… says the guy whose relationship I ruined."

He shrugged. "I _might_ have helped with ruining it, come to think," he said, and he tipped back a sip of his drink. Then he smiled with only ther smallest touch of sadness.

"Just drink, Dani," he said. "I don't want to be the only drunk one tonight."

The resignation in his words made me winced inwardly, so I did as he asked, the three of us nursing our drinks for a minute or two in silence. The alcohol soon made my arms feel a little tingly, like they had fallen partially asleep but in the best way possible.

"You know," I said as I toyed with the strings of my ukulele absently, "a song isn't the best way to get a girl to stay with you."

Yusuke—who had finished his first beer and was already halfway through with his second—quirked an eyebrow at me. "It's _not_?" he said, genuinely surprised. "But in all the movies—"

"A song can get a girl to be _with_ you, but not to actually _stay_," I said. "The only way to actually get a girl to stay… and even then, it's not…"

I trailed off, thinking about it through a minutely tipsy haze (I had trouble using big words, but other than that I felt normal). It wasn't like what I had in mind couldn't be called off, but it was as damn near close to permanent as possible, so…

"What way are you talking about, Dani?" Kuwabara said. I could see the interest in his eyes; perhaps he was thinking of Yukina?

"Well," I said slowly, "it's the only way to get them to stay, though it isn't fool-proof, but..." I shrugged, looking at them with apology. "I can't guarantee either of you are gonna like it."

Yusuke seemed a little scared, since he started edging slowly away from me like I had the plague or something, but despite his wariness he managed to say: "Just tell us."

I took a deep breath.

"Once upon a time, in a land far, far away," I said, and Yusuke balked.

"You're gonna tell me a fairytale?" he griped.

I glared at him. "Wait for me to get there, OK?"

He fell silent, cowed.

"Anyway," I said, "there was once a very wise woman living in America. Her name was Beyoncé. One day she got dumped by her boyfriend, and then she started seeing another guy but her old boyfriend got all jealous and stuff, so she told him…" I paused for dramatic effect, then proclaimed: "She said, 'If you liked then you should have put a ring on it!'"

The table went so silent that I could hear the way my hair moved when it twisted around my ears. Yusuke looked at me like I was absolutely nuts. Kuwabara seemed shocked, but as I watched his face morphed into something resembling honest-to-goodness contemplation.

"What does that even _mean_?" Yusuke finally figured out how to splutter. "If you liked it then you should have put a—what the _hell_?"

It was my turn to feel confused. "What, you guys don't exchange wedding rings in this country?" I asked.

"We do," Kuwabara assured me. "It's an old custom but most everybody follows it."

"But what does that have to do with _any_thing?" Yusuke put in. He clutched his bottle of beer so hard that it shattered, spraying the front of his shirt with alcohol and shards of glass. He jumped up, cursing, and I scrambled for my unworn sweatshirt and passed it over for him to use as an impromptu towel.

"It means," I said as Yusuke blotted himself dry, "that if you like Keiko, you should _marry her_."

Yusuke froze. I pointed at my wedding finger, waggling the attached hand around the way Beyoncé did in her videos.

"_You_ know," I said, winking. "Put a ring on her!"

"B-but," Yusuke said, and I pointed straight at his face. He blinked at me, startled, and I lowered the hand.

"Keiko's hot stuff, Yusuke," I said. "In all seriousness, she's kind of a babe. She's smart, too, and if you don't act fast she's going to get tired of waiting around for you and move on."

"But I've proposed _twice_!" he wailed, dropping to the floor so he could roll around and clutch at his head. "_Twice_! And where has it gotten me?"

"But have you proposed down on one knee, ring in hand, with a date for the ceremony in mind?" I inquired innocently.

I took a healthy swig of my beer as Yusuke fidgeted in guilty silence.

"I _see_," I said in mock astonishment. "_There's_ the difference! Just _saying_ you want to marry her is empty; easy to refuse, too. Action speaks louder than words." I paused, lips on my bottle's cold mouth. "Money does too, in this case. You don't want a ring out of a gumball machine."

"So the only way to keep her… is to marry her?" Yusuke asked. His eyes opened wide, mouth parted in trepidation.

"Beyoncé would say so," I said.

"And I'd say so, too," Kuwabara said. When Yusuke seemed surprised, Kuwabara just shrugged. "You skipped school too much to know this, but Keiko's popular—"

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "I know that."

But Kuwabara just shook his head. "No, Yusuke—I mean, she's _really_ popular. Boys asked her out all the time in middle school, like almost every day. I'm sure it's only gotten worse now that she's in college."

To his credit, Yusuke looked paled by this new bit of information. He stared down at the table, expressionless and unnerved, until Kuwabara's words made him bite his bottom lip and sharply look up.

"If you don't get her soon, man," Kuwabara said with an utterly serious expression, "she'll get away forever, and a guy like you will _never_ find a girl like her again."

"Yes, detective—for all my dislike of humans, the woman is far too good for you to simply toss aside."

We all jumped, because I think we'd all forgotten that Hiei was still in the room. He looked bored when I twisted around to see him, still sitting just to the left of the door with his back against the wall, and his eyes were closed. He looked asleep; I would have thought I had hallucinated his comment had he not chosen that moment to speak again.

"Dani and the oaf are right."

His eyes opened; he looked straight at me.

My blood ran a little hotter.

"You," said Hiei, "should marry her."

"You see, that's _three_ people saying you should, Yusuke!" I said, spinning back around so I didn't have to look at Hiei anymore_because looking at him and the expression he was making made me feel like I was suddenly in the tropics fuckfuckfuck_and Yusuke had gone from looking scared to looking rather thoughtful.

"I think you guys are kind of… right," he admitted slowly. His smile came faintly at first, but then it grew into a full-fledged grin. "No, you guys are _totally_ right! I'm going to ask Keiko to marry me, and I'm going to do it right!" He hopped to his feet, vaulted over the kotatsu, and sprinted out the door.

"Wait, I didn't mean you should ask her _tonight_!" I screeched, flopping backward onto my stomach as I watched him vanish into the hall. In a much smaller, defeated voice, I said "Great, I've done it _again_," and smacked my forehead onto the floorboards with a hollow 'thock' sound.

"Urameshi!" Kuwabara yelped, rising to his knees as he stared out the door in shock. Yusuke's voice came floating back to us over the sound of his running (and fading) footsteps.

"Sorry, gotta ask Botan where I can find a jewelry store this late!" was the last thing we heard, and then he was gone.

"Ain't young love grand?" I quipped, flopping upright so I could put my head and arms and torso down onto the table. I carefully held my beer to my forehead. The cold felt magical. "Ugh, it's stuffy in here."

Kuwabara reached under the table, fumbled around for a second, and then the kotatsu's heater stopped buzzing in my cheekbones. "Better?" he asked.

"Marginally," I said, still rubbing my face with that bottle. I sat up long enough to drain it—all that was left, which was a little more than half the bottle—in a few long pulls. Then I flopped back down, bottle falling from my fingers to roll and hit Kuwabara's elbow. "I need another beer."

He looked down at his own empty bottle and grimaced. "Yusuke drank all of 'em," he said. "I'll go get more; I think I know where Yukina put everything." He stood up, then looked at Hiei (I guess, since he looked behind me and Hiei was the only one there) to ask: "Want anything?"

Hiei paused before saying: "No."

Then Kuwabara walked out.

Then Hiei and I were alone.

I didn't say anything for a while, just allowing myself to lay my head on the cool tabletop as my mind drifted in a somewhat tipsy daze. I was hyperaware of every shift Hiei made as he sat behind me, and eventually the silence got so awkward that I said, without raising my head: "So, how are you?"

Hiei didn't answer right away.

Then: "Rings?"

_Oh please don't talk about this oh please oh please—_

"Human tradition," I told him after making sure I hadn't given my discomfort away. I kept my eyes closed and concentrated on keeping my breathing even. "If you see a ring on the marriage finger, it means you're not supposed to hit on the person. It keeps people from getting confused."

He thought about that, then asked: "Marriage finger?"

"Um, the second-to-last on your left hand." I lifted my hand and waved the appropriate finger. "That's why it's called your ring finger."

A pause. "This… explains a lot," he murmured.

I didn't reply, choosing instead to drag my fingers through the ring of wetness my beer had left on the table. I nudged the water from a circle into a heart, and then I realized what I'd done and blotted it out with my wrist.

"You feel tense," Hiei observed.

I jumped a little, sitting up and twisting to look at Hiei. His eyes were closed, chin nearly pillowed on his chest when I said: "What makes you say that?"

One eye cracked open, revealing an amused—an _amused_, dammit!—cherry iris, and then it closed.

"You're short with me," Hiei said. "What's wrong?"

I hesitated, not quite knowing what to say. Then I put my head in my hands and sighed.

"I just… don't really know how to act," I said. "Around you, I mean."

He didn't seem offended, or angry, or even derisive when he asked: "Why?"

It took a little while, but eventually I found words enough to tell him, "I've never had a… well, I've never been…" I pushed the heels of my hands into my eyes. "Crap."

"What?"

"I've never—well, I've never had a boyfriend before," I said. I didn't realize I was holding my breath afterward until my vision started dancing with black spots around the edges, and after I took a few hasty breaths to calm myself Hiei finally gave me a reply. "Here I am giving Yusuke advice when I've never even—"

"You're afraid of doing something wrong," he said.

I winced, staring at the tabletop and the destroyed heart-water-thing—was this Hiei's way of getting back at me for calling him _scared_ earlier?

"That's one way of putting it, yeah," I murmured at long last.

"Act the way you always do," Hiei said. He sounded calm, logical, and sure of himself—infuriatingly so. "The way you acted, before."

I let out an incredulous snort. "What, you want me to want to kiss you all the time and pretend like I don't?"

"…you wanted to kiss me?"

Cue the instantaneous blush and my heart feeling like it was going to pop from beating so hard—oh dear lord, what had I just _said_? Was this the beer talking? It wasn't like I'd drunk all the much—

Luckily for me and the sake of my pride, dignity, and sanity, footsteps down the hall cut my conversation with Hiei short. Yusuke came stomping through the door with a clearly imprinted handprint on his face, grumbling to himself as he sat down at the kotatsu and stared sourly up at me.

"Botan didn't like you barging into her room, huh?" I said as I stared at the print.

"Not remotely," he said. He covered his face with his hands, sighing, and from down the hall I heard more footsteps. "I need more to drink. Tonight sucks."

"I guess I'm right on time, then," Kuwabara said as he came inside. He sat in his old spot and set a six-pack on the table, and then—

"COINS!" Yusuke shouted as he sat up. Kuwabara had placed two shot glasses, two coins, and a jug of Genkai's sake on the table with a grin. "Oh yeah, _coins_! Awesome! And we even have four people!"

Hiei snorted. "As if _I'd_ play your stupid little game," he sneered.

"And I really don't want to get _that_ drunk, thanks," I said as I took another beer and opened it. "Beer's enough for me."

Kuwabara looked disappointed. "You could play, but not drink," he suggested, and I was about to reply that I _could_ do that when Yusuke slammed his hand down on the table. We looked at him in surprise, and my stomach lurched when I saw the devious grin making his lips stretch to their widest.

"I think," he said sweetly, "that I found the favor I want."

My jaw dropped. "B-but, this is—"

"I want you to play quarters with us," he declared. "I want you to play quarters and _drink_!"

"This is a waste of your favor, Yusuke!" I snapped, but he just grinned and shook his head and passed me one of the shot glasses.

"You're starting, and you're drinking," he said. Then he pretended to be hurt, a hand over his chest like I'd wounded him. "Or is our alliance called off?"

I held onto the shot glass, feeling its cold contours cut into my hand as I gripped it tight, weighing my option of alienating Yusuke with one night of drunken shenanigans, and—

"Fine," I sighed, setting the glass in front of me before reaching for a coin. "But I'm warning you—I'm a beast at this game. _You_ might end up under the table instead of _me_."

Kuwabara looked scared. "Why do I feel like you're going to make good on that threat?" he said.

"Because I'm awesome," I said. I cracked my knuckles before picking up my coin, readying it, and then I threw it—

—only to have it veer off-course and not even _graze_ the glass.

I stared at the wayward coin as Yusuke laughed his head off, mouth dropped open in shock.

"Th-the coin is different from the ones I'm used to!" I snapped when even Kuwabara let out a giggle. I picked it up again and threw it, only to miss a second time. "Shit! I need to practice!"

"You suck, Dani!" Yusuke cackled. "You _really_ suck!"

"Shut up!" I said, bouncing the coins like mad, and on about the fifth time I managed to make it into the glass. "HA!" I shouted. "SUCK ON _THAT_, BITCHES!"

Kuwabara glanced over at Hiei. "You sure you don't wanna play with us?" he asked dubiously. "You could try to keep Dani out of trouble."

"Or are you just scared you'll lose?" Yusuke asked the fire demon, teasing him.

I twisted to look at Hiei, whose eyes flickered to me. Then, to my immense surprise, Hiei actually stood up and sat down on the kotatsu's last empty side, which happened to be to my right.

"You might want to pick another seat," I suggested. "I'll be passing the glasses that way. You'll be drinking a lot."

He gave me a half-glare. "Don't bet on it," he said. "Now how do I play?"

I explained the rules—bounce a coin into the glass, pass the glass to the right, and if you wind up with two glasses in front of you, you have one chance to make the coin into the stacked glasses, of which the penalty for missing is a shot of liquor.

He took the rules in silently, then shot me a dark look. "Is that all there is?" he asked.

"Actually, no," I said, much to Kuwabara and Yusuke's surprise. "If you can make two bounces into the glass in a row, you can pass it in the other direction to trap someone." I looked at the other boys with an apologetic grin. "I didn't want to load you up with too many rules right at first, so I left that one out. Sorry."

"Well, what happens if you try to make two shots, and miss the second one?" Kuwabara asked.

"You have to start all over to get even the first-pass shot," I said.

Yusuke cracked his knuckles. "Sweet," he said. "Let's play this." He looked to Kuwabara, who sat on his left (across from me). "I'm going to trap you _so hard_ with this new two-shots trick."

"Not if I gang up on you, Yusuke," I said sweetly, and he gulped as Kuwabara laughed and grabbed a glass.

"Ready?" the psychic asked, and I nodded before letting my coin fly.

The game commenced in a flurry of coinage flying across the table. I made my shot on the third try and passed the coin-and-cup to Hiei, who took it with a smirk and attempted to make his shot. He missed, however, and his teeth ground together as he made a second, third, and then fourth failed attempt.

"Don't throw the coin so hard," I said. "Just bounce it, keep your wrist smooth—"

"Here, Dani," Yusuke said as he pushed a glass in front of me (he and Kuwabara had both finished while I wasn't looking).

"Watch me," I told Hiei, and I smoothly made the shot on my first try. His eyes widened as he recognized what I was doing and began to study the coin in his hand, weighing it on his palm slowly.

"Ha, Hiei!" Yusuke chortled. "If you don't make it on your first try, now, you have to drink!"

"Not quite," I said to Yusuke, and I made another smooth shot. The detective paled as I passed the cup his way; I smiled at the staring-at-me Hiei, saying: "I won't give you another grace shot again."

He looked back at his own glass without expression, bounced the coin—and made it in. His lips split with a grin.

"I'm not going to _need_ a grace shot," he said, still grinning his creepy little grin, and before I could protest he had made another shot and pushed the glass to me.

My jaw dropped. Hiei smirked in satisfaction. Meanwhile, Yusuke let out a whoop when he made a shot and also passed his cup my way.

"Now _you_ only have one chance to make it!" he cackled as he reached over and stacked the glasses in front of me. "HA! You DO suck!"

The unfairness of it all made me stutter. "B-but I've never practiced a stacked shot with these coins before!" I said.

"Yeah, guys, cut her some slack," Kuwabara said.

"No," Yusuke and Hiei said at the same time, and I glared at them both before attempting to make the goal.

Of course, I missed.

Yusuke began laughing hysterically as Kuwabara grabbed one of the glasses and began pouring alcohol into it, shaking his head slowly as Hiei grinned at me. I leaned back in my chair and sighed, glancing at Hiei with a scowl. "Traitor," I muttered, but he just shrugged.

"Here, Dani," Kuwabara said. He held out the shot glass, full of amber liquid, out to me from across the table.

I got up on my knees to reach for it. As I accepted the drink from Kuwabara, I looked him in the eye and said: "E tu, Brute?"

His smile was a regretful one. "Sorry, Caesar," he said, and I tipped back the shot.

The booze was halfway down my throat when I realized that something weird—not to mention _important_—had just happened, but the instant the alcohol hit my stomach I was beyond the point of caring, or of even recognizing what that something was.

* * *

NOTES:

_BAHAHA, HIEI LOVES YUKINA. Yeah. Was that less funny than I thought it was? Yes? Whoops._

_In the interest of not having to pull an all-nighter to finish my midterm paper, I can't deliver more than this this week, which means this is the second time I've not been able to fit in the Britney Spears thing. UGH. But maybe the Beyoncé comment can tide you over? I dunno. I just really have to work and I honestly can't manage more than this at the moment. Sorry!_

_At any rate, we have some resolution to the YusukexKeiko debacle in the form of a Dani-Yusuke-alliance. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? Wait and see to find out. ^^ We will also have a moment of Hiei-ness to end all others, a moment spurred onward by Dani's impending drunken state, AND OMG YOU'RE NOT GONNA/YOU'RE TOTALLY GONNA LIKE IT!_

_This week has been very frustrating for me. Not bad, per say, but frustrating. I'm not too sure how else I can describe it. I hope all of you are doing fine!_

_So with this week's update, I broke 500,000 words of story. WTF? Is that normal? I never expected Future Talk to come this far!_

_Not much else to say at the moment. Love you guys. Lilmickey2008, Engraved-Angel, NAO-chan33, MusicFiend666, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Goodbye Darling, yonet-chan, Cheshire Blue Kitten, colbub, etowa-ru, Yoko Kiara14, Ry171819, ovenfreshh, spiritfoxxx821, Reality Bores Me, Supreme Baka, Kaiya's Watergarden, PhyscoticOnna, Procrastination Possum, Madame Blaze, TallyYoungblood, archangel fighter, Caralirani, Kai-Chan94, hieisdarkdragonchick, chocolateluvr13, TeacupKitty, Reiko Tsuchikake, OhhTaylorJade, chibi387, , Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, double-a-battery, ephemeral violet, Snowgirl7589, phantomxofxmystery, nani san, j.d.y., AnimeFreak2306, Angel of Randomosity, Willowleaf2560, Koryu Elric, StrawberryHuggles!_


	68. Chapter 68: Trouble For Me

**Warning: There's more cursing than usual and quite a lot of alcohol in this chapter.**

Just, you know... don't get caught unawares.

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 68:

"Trouble For Me"

* * *

Being a lightweight, I assure you, really sometimes sucks.

"That's _vile_!" I shrieked, shuddering from head to toe as I slammed the empty shot glass—a fragile testament to my first successful shot of the night—onto the table. "I mean that's, that's just GROSS!"

Yusuke laughed, mouth opened wide with hands smacking his knees in glee. His eyes streamed hysterical tears: "Your face! Ohmygod, your FACE right now!"

"That booze tastes like dead lobster mixed with pennies!" I snapped, and I started smacking in order to clear my mouth of the horrible flavor. The alcohol had made my head grow fuzzy the instant it was down my throat, but besides that little debacle, I was mostly OK… maybe my tolerance had grown? "Ugh, seriously, _gross_! Why the hell does Genkai make that stuff?"

"Maybe she's just a sadistic bitch?" Yusuke offered, but then he shook his head. "Nope. I already know that's true."

"What are pennies?" Kuwabara wanted to know as he began rummaging under the table. Plastic rustled; I would have wondered what he had under there had I not been so concerned with what was happening in my mouth—AKA, Armageddon.

"Um, coins made of copper," I told him. I swallowed, thinking I had successfully ingested enough air to combat the flavor on my tongue, but the action of gulping made the taste of the alcohol surface all over again—really, it had a metal aftertaste and an aroma befitting decomposing shellfish—and I almost gagged as I choked out the words: "Chaser, chaser, I need a _chaser_!"

"Here," Yusuke said, holding something out to me. I snatched it out of his hand and chugged, only to realize—

"You made me chase _liquor_ with _beer_!" I shrieked, throwing the empty bottle at him. "Oh my god, worst idea EVER!"

Yusuke caught the bottle and held it upside down. When nothing came out, he grinned and said: "But that didn't exactly stop you from drinking it, now did it?"

"Here!" said Kuwabara. He was holding out a shallow plastic container filled with green leaves. "Eat on one of these!"

Caution had no place in a situation that intense. "This'd been not be marijuana," I grumbled as I took a leaf and popped it in my mouth. The instant my teeth crushed down on it a minty sweetness spilled all over, coating my tongue and teeth with a light layer of peace. I let out a low moan and rested (read: slammed) my forehead on the table as the taste of the alcohol/poison/pure evil quickly faded altogether, leaving me with a sensation of just having rinsed with gentle (but effective) mouthwash.

"Mint leaves?" I heard Hiei ask. He sounded half amused and half annoyed over the sound of my chewing, which I guess is normal for him.

"Yeah," Kuwabara said. "It's the only thing that can actually make the taste go away, so I came prepared." He paused before asking: "How'd you know?"

Hiei said: "I can smell them."

"Creepy."

"Shut up, oaf."

"_You_ shut up, shortstack!"

I lifted my head off the table, swallowed the mint, and asked: "Pancakes?"

Everyone froze and stared at me for a second.

"_You_ know," I said. "A short stack… of pancakes?" I leaned back and stared at the ceiling, then gave a horrendously loud fake laugh. "BA HA HA! _Pancakes_!"

"Dear god, she's drunk already," Yusuke deadpanned. Then he clapped his hands together and grinned. "Perfect! Now she'll _really_ suck at coins!"

"I'm not drunk _yet_, Yusuke," I snapped at him, and then I gave a triumphant smile. "In fact, Genkai's alcohol isn't actually that bad. It still hasn't hit—"

Suddenly, I froze.

Kuwabara muttered: "Here it comes."

In all of two seconds the drink had hit me, and it had hit me _hard, _putting my fuzzy-headedness from earlier to instant shame (really, I had been a fool to think my tolerance had grown when the liquor was simply taking its sweet, malevolent time). The booze curled into my toes in hot little waves, cresting coils of undulating tingles and shuddering pulses that fought to creep into every last inch of my extremities. My body fought against it by cringing in on itself, a pillbug curling up to avoid being squished, but even as I tried to beat back the hot throbs—oh _wow_, was that stuff potent—the alcohol just shouldered past my willpower like a linebacker straight-arming a QB. Blood rushed into my head as if someone had suddenly swung me upside-down and let me stay there. I could almost hear the drink's nefarious chuckle as my hands grew clammy and my lips started to go numb.

"What the _fuck_ is this shit doin' t' me?" I said, staring at the table like it could tell me the answer. My tongue had gone tingly, making it hard to talk without running all my words together.

"We call it 'the creeping drink'," Kuwabara solemnly intoned. "Takes a while to hit, but when it does…"

"Fuckin' crazy, all of you," I said.

Yusuke, rather than respond to my question, just cocked his head to the side. "You know," he said, "it's really weird to see you curse."

I looked at him and found it exceptionally difficult to focus my eyes. All that came out of my mouth was an inarticulate: "Huh?"

Yusuke smirked. "I said, it's really weird when you curse."

"… why?"

"Because you look like you're twelve. Those're grownup words."

My jaw dropped. "I'm _twenty_!"

Yusuke studied his nails. "I was going to accuse Hiei of statutory at one point, but he's so short that he also kind of looks like he's—"

"You watch your tongue, detective, or I'll cut it out for you," Hiei hissed. I couldn't help but smile when he glanced at me; for some reason, my getting-to-the-point-of-major-drunkenness brain found Hiei's little protective streak exceptionally cute…

"Whoa, back up there, buddy!" Yusuke said, holding up his hands as if to ward the demon off. "I was just kidding!" Brown eyes turned sly. "Although, if you _really_ want to get back at me… we could always play more of that coin-game."

I let out a joyed 'whoop' and pointed at Kuwabara. "Set us up, big brother!"

The psychic stared at me in confusion. "Did you just all me 'onii-san'?"

"Fugghetaboutit," I slurred. "Rooooll with me. 'Cuz that's how I roooooll."

He slowly reached for the shot glasses, one nervous eye trained on me. "Oh… kay?"

Suddenly, a shadow loomed over and made me blink. A hot hand on my arm heralded the command of: "Switch with me."

I looked up and blinked to find Hiei kneeling at my side. He had risen to one knee and was looking at Yusuke, eyes narrowed until all I could see was faintest cherry peering from between his lashes… and the hand on my arm, it was so warm, I felt like all the blood in my body started rushing toward the place where his skin lingered against mine, hyperaware and sensitive and—

I had been staring at him so hard that I had forgotten he'd said anything; he had to repeat the question to get my attention, but even then I just blinked up at him until he slowly, carefully, and loudly repeated his command for the third time.

It took me a minute how to remember to say: "Say please!"

Hiei glowered.

"Do it," I said.

Hiei glowered some more.

I put on my best puppy-face. "Please?"

The corner of his mouth twitched.

"Pleeeease?"

He looked away, lips moving so slightly that I barely saw them twitch.

"That'll do," I said, and I scooted out of my spot. Hiei took it with a nod as I climbed onto his abandoned cushion; it was warmer than mine had been. "Why're we switching?"

Hiei said nothing, but he did look me up and down as if to assess… how drunk I was? I couldn't be sure.

Yusuke, however, seemed to know. "He's going to try to get me with the backwards double-shots," Yusuke said, popping his knuckles. "And I'm taking that as a personal challenge."

"I'm only switching places because _you_ would target _her_ if she were to sit here," Hiei said. He picked up his coin and glared at it. "She's had enough as it is."

"Spoilsport," I said.

"Ready?" said Kuwabara.

Hiei nodded.

Kuwabara and Hiei began bouncing their coins at the same moment, each trying as hard as they could to make the shot. I watched, mesmerized, as Hiei made his on the first try and slid the coin and glass my way. Kuwabara was still trying for his; Yusuke egged him on with half-formed phrases and muted shouts.

"Thank you!" I chirped. I tipped the coin onto my hand and replaced the shot glass in front of me. "My turn."

"Try not to take too long," Hiei said gruffly, but I only gave him my sunniest smile as I lifted the coin, held it steady, and then—

_Ching!_

"A fluke; you're drunk," Hiei said in response to my perfect shot.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed the coin again. I held it up, leveled it, and—

_Ching!_

I don't think I've ever seen Hiei's eyes get that wide before. I couldn't stop grinning as I slid the shot glass his way, watching him watch me the way a man watches a snake he thought was harmless bite and kill someone.

"My skill increases pro-pro, pro-por, _proportionally_ to my drink-count, so don't gimme more or you're toast," I slurred. Then I glanced at Yusuke. "Better watch it, honeybun."

"_Honeybun_?" the fire demon repeated, but then he jerked his head toward the detective, who had gotten his shot glass from a victorious Kuwabara and was trying very hard to put the coin into it. Hiei snatched up his coin with a curse, but he was too late: Yusuke managed to make his shot before Hiei even had a chance to make an attempt.

"Bad idea to sit next to me," the detective said as he plopped the second glass into the one Hiei had not yet managed to fill—but then he realized what he was doing and did a double-take. "Wait, you haven't even managed to get it in _once_?"

Hiei growled and sent a glance in my direction. "_She_ sent it back to me," he said.

Kuwabara's jaw dropped. "Wait, but she's drunk!"

"I get more better the more drunker I more get; it's muscle memory," I explained, trying to keep my face straight, but then I got the giggles and collapsed onto the table. "Wow, guys. Grammar fail."

"Sit up and get out of my way so I can make this," Hiei said. I did so and tried to look innocent, blinking at him through widened eyes, but he paid me little mind and instead attempted to bounce the coin into the stacked glasses.

He missed.

Yusuke laughed. Kuwabara chortled. I couldn't help but laugh at Hiei's frustrated and embarrassed expression, and I couldn't help but laugh even louder when he snapped: "I've never tried for a stacked shot like that before!"

"Didn't stop us from penalizing Dani," Kuwabara said as he grabbed a glass and began pouring Genkai's terrible booze. He passed it to Hiei. "Drink up."

Hiei took the glass with a glare, but he put it to his lips and tossed it back like a manly man. His throat worked when he swallowed, and his eyes were closed when he slammed the cup onto the table with a crack… We watched with bated breath as he sat there, absolutely motionless, but then his chest hitched a little and his breathing came a little quicker. I flinched when wild scarlet eyes flew open.

"Mint," he growled through clenched teeth. "_Now_."

Kuwabara scrambled for the mint as Hiei stared at him, face expressionless despite his somewhat ragged inhales and his dilated pupils. His hand lashed out and grabbed a handful of leaves when Kuwabara proffered them; I watched, utterly fascinated, as Hiei stuffed them in his mouth and viciously chewed, breathing a massively relieved sigh after he swallowed the plants down.

"Who in their _right fucking mind_ would ever knowingly drink that swill?" he snarled when he finally could. "It's worse than piss!"

Yusuke asked: "You've drunk piss?"

Scarlet went crimson and murderously dark. "You son of a—"

"Language, darling," I said in my best imitation of a prim housewife.

Hiei shot me a dirty look. "Do you expect me to just—"

He stopped talking when his eyes flew open.

"Ooh, look, it hit him," Yusuke said. "That's quicker than with most people."

"I have a demon's metabolism, you fool," Hiei said, grimacing as he put a hand over his face. "It hits faster with me than it does with humans."

"Is that why it hits you earlier than me, Yusuke?" Kuwabara asked. "And since you're just a half demon, then for Hiei it must be even worse?"

Yusuke just shrugged. Hiei demanded another mint leaf.

The game picked up again, with Yusuke and I starting. The round ended with Yusuke taking a drink, and after another round Kuwabara had to drink. Yet another round later Kuwabara had to drink again, but the round after that I managed to send my cup back Hiei's way just as Yusuke finished his own attempts. Hiei didn't like that all that much; he growled lowly, muttering incoherent words under his breath as he readied the coin so he could bounce it.

However, I was feeling rather… well, prank-y. As soon as I saw the coin hit the table, I shook the kotatsu as hard as I could. The coin glanced off the side of the shot glass with a clink and I started to laugh, flopping onto my side as I pressed my face into the cushions in an attempt to muffle my humor. Yusuke didn't try to hide his laughter at all, laughter that only grew louder when Hiei—sounding very much incensed—fumed: "That's _cheating_!"

I choked down my laughs and looked up at him. "All's fair in love and drinking games!" I gasped out.

Kuwabara (who had begun to grow glassy-eyed) tried not to spill the shot he was pouring as he said: "Yeah, and you two've got _both_ workin' for ya!"

Hiei's angry expression faded into another, less familiar one. His eyebrows rose high, eyes going quite wide, and his mouth pursed as if he were trying to ask 'Who, me?' I, however, just sat up and leaned my elbows on the table, staring at Kuwabara with sudden gratitude.

"Daw, how sweet!" I cooed, reaching out to take his hand after he finished handing a drink to Hiei (who had begun staring at his lap with that same weird expression). "You know you're, like, my _best friend _here!"

Kuwabara raised one eyebrow as he peeled my fingers off his wrist. "I thought _Ren_ was your best friend," he said.

My brow furrowed. "Oh. Right."

Yusuke smacked the table to get my attention before asking: "Hey, what about _me_? You're my friend, too!"

I gave him a stern look. "No, you're my partner in crime," I said as I pointed at Yusuke. I looked back to Kuwabara and grinned. "And Kuwabara, you're the brother I always wished I could've convinced my parents to have, and Hiei—"

The fire apparition froze, shot glass poised by his lips as I stared at him. I worried my bottom lip with my teeth, thinking hard, but the alcohol had made my thoughts more than a little fuzzy.

"…I don't know what you are," I finished at last.

Hiei set down his cup, scowling. "_That's_ flattering."

I winced. "Uh… You're cute?"

He picked up the glass again. "I can live with that," he said, staring at me over the cup's rim, and while holding my eyes he downed the shot. He broke my stare in order to get a piece of mint to chew on, but a satisfied smirk hovered at the corners of his mouth while he did it.

Yusuke, meanwhile, was pretending to vomit under the table. I threw an empty bottle at him, which he dodged.

Once again, we started the game back up. Yusuke and Kuwabara got into a heated war and ended up taking a lot more to drink, each, and I actually ended up having to take a drink when Kuwabara unexpectedly turned on me. Hiei was no help, either; I think he had given up trying to protect me when I pulled the table-shaking stunt on him, because he paid no mercy when Kuwabara double-stroked and sent the cup back to me. Hiei sent his over right on Kuwabara's cup's heels. I, however, pulled a neat trick by making the stacked-glass shot in one attempt, a feat that forced everyone else to drink. Much grumbling ensued on their parts; on my part, all that ensued was giggling.

By that point, Hiei and I had only had about two shots apiece. Kuwabara and Yusuke, on the other hand, both had taken significantly more. Hiei made a point of making fun of them for that (I think "You fools can't even play a stupid _game_ right!" were his exact words) and this resulted in me saying: "Hiei, don't make fun of them!"

"Why?" he wanted to know.

"'Cuz I'm as drunk as 'em, even if I don't suck like 'em," I explained. I leaned forward to pat Hiei's hand. "You're th' only one not smashed, buddy-pal-thing-man-bro."

Yusuke's eyes narrowed after that remark. "That need some fixin'," he said, and he grinned first at me, and then at Kuwabara. "What's say we give ol' Hiei here a run for his money?"

"Dude," Kuwabara said, staring at Hiei in awe (who stared back in rising consternation). "Dude, dude, _drunk Hiei_?"

"Shit-yeah, man!" Yusuke said. He leaned an elbow on the kotatsu and pointed it at Hiei's face. "Prepare to get _fucked_, shorty!"

Hiei was unamused. "I'd rather not even be _touched_ by you, actually."

Yusuke blinked like a baby deer. "How 'bout Dani, then? Can _she_ fuck you?"

I promptly collapsed into a laughed-so-hard-I-cried fit, rolling into a ball on my cushion as Hiei's jaw went slack. Kuwabara had a reaction similar to my own, though he had been chewing on a leaf and started to choke as a result. I sat up and pounded him on the back.

"Detective: _Shut up_!" Hiei snarled, and before I knew what was happening he had picked up a coin and started to slam it against the tabletop. It missed the shot glass and he tried again; even though Kuwabara was still choking a little, he too started to fire away with his coin. I watched them play with my mouth open until they finished at the same time; then it was mine and Yusuke's turn to play the game.

I managed to get the first shot in, but I went for a double and missed and had to start all over. Yusuke saw my failure and intentionally messed up, missing all of his own shots until I managed to get another one in.

"You two are working together!" Hiei said, outraged when Yusuke and I locked eyes and started counting to three under our breaths. We ignored Hiei, however, and aimed for the glasses at the same time, somehow managing to make our shots at the exact same moment.

"HOT DAMN!" Yusuke bellowed, jumping to his knees so he could high-five me. "That was the most awesomest thing I've ever seen in my entire goddamn _life_!"

"We rock! We rock! We rock!" I sang, doing a stupid little dance that Yusuke quickly joined in on. "Oh yeah, we rock, we rock, we rock!"

"Hiei drinks! Hiei drinks! Hiei drinks!" Kuwabara joined in, using the same tune I had as he picked up Genkai's sake bottle and grabbed one of the shot glasses.

"I'm not out of this yet," Hiei hissed. He snatched the glass out of Kuwabara's hand (the psychic first looked mystified, then outraged) and stacked it with the other one. "I can still make this!"

Yusuke grabbed the edge of the table and stared at Hiei, hard. I did the same on the other side, fully prepared to sabotage Hiei's goal with another table-shake maneuver (really, this me n' Yusuke teamwork was something else).

Hiei, sensing our duplicitousness, quickly pulled back and glared at us. "I'm not going to even try when you're so obviously going to _shake the kotatsu_!" he snapped.

I let go and held up my hands as if told to reach for the sky by a sheriff in an old western; Yusuke did the same.

"Keep away from the table, idiots," Hiei said, eyeing us warily, and he was about to prepare his throw when he once again dropped the hand with the coin into his lap. Scarlet eyes practically burned when he said: "Kuwabara!"

The aforementioned human quickly stopped holding the table's edge and held up his hands in the same pose as Yusuke and me.

"At least the oaf was being sneaky about it," Hiei said to me, eyes narrowed and lips thinned, and he turned back to his glass so he could make the shot.

I didn't plan on actually messing him up (not _that time_, at least) so even I was a little surprised when I timed my words precisely with his upswing and blurted: "You're sexy."

Hiei's face contorted into a shocked mask of disbelief and interrupted concentration. The throw came down much harder than it should have as Hiei's head swiveled in my direction on reflex; the coin hit the table with a note like a bell and sailed high over its intended target, winding up in none other than Kuwabara's lap.

Yusuke guffawed and fell over sideways, beating his fists on the ground. Kuwabara reacted in much the same manner, actually grabbing Yusuke by the shoulder so he could heave the other man upright again.

"You're sexy!" the tall man simpered in an unflattering mimicry of my soprano voice, and Yusuke pretended to throw a coin and then look comically flustered. The boys collapsed again when their pantomime was through, all but shaking the rafters with their laughter.

Meanwhile, I stared at Hiei with all the innocence, nonchalance, and cheerfulness I could muster. He stared back with his mouth open, but then it clicked shut and he looked at the boys to snap: "Quit laughing!"

"But, but, but," Yusuke wheezed. "You're _sexy_!"

"You shoulda seen the look on your face, shorty!" Kuwabara chimed in. He met Yusuke's eyes and they started laughing once more, unable to hold back when the sight of Hiei's face was still so fresh in their minds.

Hiei turned my way when he saw that the boys were a lost cause. "Woman!" he said gruffly. "I can't defend myself in this game when you—"

He stopped talking, staring at me as though unsure of how to speak to me (weird, right?), and then to my complete and utter surprise I had the satisfaction of witnessing something unheard of, something as rare as the hiruiseki stone around Hiei's neck, something positively _magical_.

Hiei—lord of the Black Dragon and quite possibly the most prideful son of a bitch on earth—actually blushed.

"When I _what_, Hiei?" I asked sweetly when I saw how his cheeks and nose went a fraction—just a _fraction_!—of a shade darker. I don't think anyone would have been able to see the blush had they not been as obsessed with looking at Hiei as I was, but I still felt more than a little satisfied at being able to affect him enough to induce such a reaction (whether or not it was more thanks to the alcohol than it was to me, regardless).

The man chose to look off to the side, teeth clenching and lips parted in a silent snarl, but the infinitesimal redness in his cheeks didn't fade.

Drunk-Dani loved seeing that. I blame _her_, not me, for leaning forward and inching into his line of vision so our faces were only a couple of inches apart, and I blame her even more for being the one to whisper: "Has no one ever told you how sexy you are before?"

His eyes jerked to mine, showing more than a little embarrassed pleasure reflecting in their depths (thought I might have been reading him wrong; I was drunk, after all). They flashed away again when he snapped: "You're _baiting_ me!"

I pulled back and threw up my hands. "Well, it's _your fault_ that I can't help it!" I griped. "You're just so _cute_ when you're flustered!"

Hiei appeared mortified. "Woman!" he said, going just a little redder across the face, and he was about to say something else when I lurched to my knees, leaned around the table, and practically fell on top of him. He caught my upper arms and held me there, with me awkwardly leaning forward so I was just a tiny bit taller than him and with only a few inches of space between us, and since my forearms and hands were free I went ahead and did what I had been wanting to do: I put my fingers over his mouth and smiled.

"Shh, shhhhh… it's OK," I assured him. His eyes went wide above my fingertips, breath moving hot and harsh over my hand. "_Embrace_ the sexiness."

"I will _not_," he snapped, letting go of one arm so he could swat my hand off of his lips, but that made me overbalance and I really _did_ fall onto him. I was resting between his legs with my hands braced on his chest, head flopped onto his shoulder so my mouth went right up against the side of his neck, and with a sigh I snaked my arms around his waist and just sat there, relaxing against him and basking in his natural heat.

The room—which had been filled with Yusuke and Kuwabara's laughter—went deadly silent. I raised my head when I realized that that was the case, peering toward the detectives with a bleary blink and parted lips.

"Wuzappenin'?" I mumbled, suddenly sleepy now that I had something so warm under me, and then Hiei's hands were on my shoulders and he had pushed me back into a kneeling position.

"You are far too drunk for your own good, woman," he growled, eyes alight with something I couldn't recognize.

"Am I?" I asked. I sat back and flopped onto the floor, lying against the wood so that its coolness seeped through the fabric of my tank top and the skin of my bared shoulders. The room spun for a second before settling down. "Ooh, maybe I _am_…"

"You still have to take your drink, Hiei," Kuwabara said, tone leaning toward awkwardness. "So, um… let me get it…"

Yusuke didn't allow the situation to get awkward: He went right into the ridicule stage, foregoing any and all tact completely.

"Why don't you two just go and get a room, already?" he slurred. "I mean, gosh, Kuwabara 'n me are _right here_!"

"_Shut up_!" Hiei said. "Just shut up and be quiet or _I will have to_ _hurt you_!"

"And nobody messes with The Brain!" I chimed in, raising a hand to point at the sky. "Sure as m' name's Pinky, nobody messes with The Brain!"

"… what on earth is she blabbering on about?"

"Beats the shit outta me."

"Here," said Kuwabara. I sat up in order to watch him hand the shot over to Hiei, who took it with a scowl. "Kampai?"

"Fuck you," Hiei spat. He tossed the liquor back and grabbed the mint bowl. "This game is stupid. This drink is stupid. _Everything's_ stupid!" he said as he jammed a leaf into his mouth. "Stupid, stupid, _stupid_!"

"Wait, even me?" I said, gasping as I smacked a hand over my heart. "_I'm_ part of everything!"

"You're not stupid—you're drunk," Hiei said. He slammed his fists onto the table and, lo and behold, actually swayed a little from side to side. "We're _all_ drunk! None of this would be happening if we _weren't all drunk_!"

"Wait, you're drunk?" Yusuke asked.

Hiei looked away, saying nothing as he grit his teeth and stared at the tabletop. His eyes, however, had trouble staying open as he sat there, blinking rapidly as if forcing themselves to keep awake.

"HA!" Yusuke said, jumping up a bit as he pointed at Hiei's face. "HA! So that's why you never drink around us! YOU'RE A LIGHTWEIGHT!"

The fire demon's head jerked up. "I am not a lightweight!"

"Yes you are, you lightweight," Yusuke said happily. "You're short and you've had three shots and you just said you're drunk, you lightweight. I've had five shots, you lightweight, and I'm…" He paused, thinking for once before saying: "Well, _I'm_ drunk, but _you're_ a badass! And you're a _demon_! You should have, like, twelve drinks and not be drunk!"

"Alcohol hits me faster and clears out quicker, you fool," Hiei said. "Whatever I am now, I'll be sober in an hour!"

"But for now, you're a pansy!" Yusuke proclaimed. He grabbed the jug of sake off the kotatsu with one hand and grabbed a shot glass in the other. "Fuckin' hell, we're taking advantage of this. Screw the game, we're going shot-for-shot until somebody collapses."

Kuwabara grinned. "Hit me, baby!" he quipped, holding out the other glass to Yusuke.

"Don't call me 'baby'."

"How 'bout 'shithead'?"

Despite the logical part of my brain knowing that doing shots for no reason other than to get drunk faster was a death sentence for me, I still giggled and reached out to take the shot from Yusuke, who then began to pour another in the other glass. I was about to drink the stuff when Hiei spotted what I was up to and grabbed my arm, pulling the drink away from my mouth. I tried to lean down to follow it, but the demon soon was trying to open my fingers and take the object from me without spilling.

"Hey, get your own!" I whined, tugging it back. "That's _mine_!"

"You've had enough!" Hiei said. "Give it here!"

"No! It's mine!"

"Woman, don't you—"

I pulled the glass back to me with a ferocious tug. Hiei, surprised at my vehemence, let go; losing his resistant force made me fall backward with a strangled cry. The shot glass flew out of my hand and tumbled end over end, spilling its contents—

"_Now_ look," I moaned, sitting back up to grab the hem of my shirt and hold it away from my body. A dark stain had turned the light grey fabric to charcoal all the way from neckline to hem, and my sweatpants were stained all over the crotch and fly. "I'm all soaked!"

"If you'd just given me the damn drink—" Hiei said.

I cut him off by lifting the hem to my nose and inhaling. With a grimace I declared: "It _stinks_!"

"And your sweatshirt is soaked, too," Kuwabara said as he lifted the object off the ground. It was still stained from when Yusuke had tried to mop up the beer he spilled during my Beyoncé speech. "You've gotta go change."

I thought about that for a second. "_Nah_!" I decided, and with all the confidence that drunk people are known for, I stripped the shirt off over my head and threw it straight at Hiei.

I was wearing a bra, thank _god_, but that didn't stop Kuwabara from slamming his head into his hands with a high-pitched squeal. Yusuke took a long look at me through plate-sized eyes before grabbing the hem of the kotatsu's quilt and pulling it over his face, also yelling something about drunks getting naked and how Americans are freaks, but I just laughed and flopped backward onto the floor, draping my elbow over my eyes because it was _just too funny_. I then started to shrug out of my sweatpants, lifting my hips off the floor so I could slide them off. I was wearing short-shorts under them, but I didn't have the presence of mind to keep those on and was left lying on the ground in nothing but my underwear.

And before you say anything: Yes. I get it. I'm an idiot. No need to go stating the obvious.

Anyway, after a minute, Yusuke peeked out from under his hiding place, saw that I was even _more_ undressed, and hid again with a curse.

Hiei freaked out, as well he should have since I appeared incapable of affecting any sort of decency on my own. "Dani!" he exclaimed, and then he was pulling me into a sitting position by my wrists and leaning me against the kotatsu. He looked furious, absolutely _furious_, and I grinned at him before giving a little wave.

"Hello, sexy," I said in an attempt to tease him, but Hiei was having none of that as he thrust my discarded pants into my arms.

"Put those back on, now!" he commanded, but I just laughed and tossed them backward over my head (Kuwabara, it should be noted, yelped—they probably landed on him).

"Where's m' ukulele?" I slurred. I felt around under the kotatsu, looking for it, and my fingers collided with cold wood. "Ah, here we go!"

"This is no time for music, dammit!" the fire demon hissed as I pulled the instrument into my arms and started tuning it. "Put something on, _now_!"

I lifted a finger to his lips, an action that made him blink and pull back with a growl.

"Shh, shh, shh," I said soothingly. "Just let me play one song, 'kay? I _need_ to. I _need_ it."

"Is she dressed yet?" came Yusuke's muffled inquiry.

"Never!" I happily declared, and with a flourish I struck my first chord.

It's weird, for me to play my music drunk. My technique gets sloppy and I have trouble keeping my tempo consistent, but for some reason the music… well. I get the urge to play when I drink, and I get the urge to play loud.

Hiei, however, didn't like that. He grabbed my strumming hand and caught my eyes, staring me down as if trying to get me to give up, but I couldn't help but smile at his anxious little face.

"This is the saddest room I ever played to," I observed placidly, jerking my head back at the concealed Kuwabara and Yusuke. "Nobody came to my show."

Hiei glowered.

"But _you're_ here," I offered sweetly.

Hiei's glower… faded.

I struck the chords again, laughing softly, and I looked down at my hands with a serene smile. _"When you were here before,"_ I sang, _"couldn't look you in the eye. You're just like an angel; your skin makes me cry. You float like a feather in a beautiful world. I wish I was special; you're so fucking special…"_

He tapped into my brain the second I started belting the chorus, eyes falling shut so the tickle in my brain could grow.

"_But I'm a creep,"_ I told him as he felt me for the meaning. _"I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here. I don't belong here!" _

The other weird thing that happens when I drink and play music is that I get very, very invested in the song I play. The words hold special weight for me, as if the alcohol strips all barriers away from my mind as I sing, and so when I started to play the second verse…

"_I don't care if it hurts; I want to have control,"_ I cried, and the next lines came out as mere whispers of longing and resignation: _"I want a perfect body. I want a perfect soul…"_

Hiei's eyes opened and met mine.

"_I want you to notice when I'm not around,"_ I told him, trying to pour every ounce of myself into those words. _"You're so fucking special—I wish I was special, but I'm a creep! I'm a weirdo! What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here! I don't belong—"_

I didn't get to finish that song, hell, I didn't even get to finish that _measure_, because Hiei reached out and took the ukulele from me, ripping the strings out from under my hands as if taking away from me a vial of poison. Before I could protest, before I could even _react_, he had reached out, cupped my face in both hands, and crashed his mouth down onto mine so hard that I felt the outline of his teeth behind his lips. I froze as he pulled back, eyes totally ablaze, and as I opened my stinging lips to ask what the hell he was doing he ripped off his shirt, gathered it in his hands, and forced the neck hole over my head.

"Get dressed, now!" he growled, and when I stared at him in confusion he forced the sleeveless, ratty shirt down over my torso, reaching to pull my arms through the holes himself. "Now get up. Come _on_!"

I made no move to do as he said; my brain, fogging and spinning and full of music I couldn't finish, refused to obey. So, Hiei snarled and grabbed my arms, leaning so his shoulder pressed firmly into my gut, and then he lifted using my ribcage as leverage and I was slung over him like a sack of potatoes.

Unluckily for him, this 'potato' had a big mouth. "Put me the fuck down!" I screeched as he turned toward the door, but the motion happened so fast that my other words caught themselves in my throat.

Yusuke didn't lose _his_ ability to speak. "Hey, what's going—wait, what the _fuck_?" he asked. I lifted my head (since I had been dangling upside-down, head near the small of Hiei's back) to see him emerge from under the kotatsu quilt, eyes wild and gelled hair mussed into weird spikes.

"Go to bed, both of you," Hiei snapped, and I caught one glimpse of Kuwabara looking up in shock before Hiei bolted out the door.

* * *

The events that transpired after Hiei's exit are hazy. I just know that one second I was peacefully playing music, and that the next I was upside-down, and that after _that_ I was being jostled around, and that suddenly I was on my feet outside my room and Hiei was pushing the door open. "Ren's asleep!" I remember telling him, and then there was a flash of bright red and a wave of heat pressed against me and my feet were no longer on the floor. We went through another doorway a second later; light from the hallway sparked before the door suddenly slammed shut, and just as suddenly I found myself sprawled on something cushiony and soft.

I sat up, mind reeling, to find myself lying on a futon that Hiei was standing at the foot of. He stared down at me, shirtless and with his eyes all agleam from where the silver moonlight from the window hit him, and I watched, fascinated, as his chest rose and fell with short, harsh breaths.

Words—drunken words, words I wasn't sure the origin of—spilled out of my mouth before I could check them: "You look at me n' your eyes flash, and you're beautiful, you know that?"

He stopped breathing altogether, lips thinning into a harsh line.

"I just, I see you seeing me and I forget to breathe—like _that_, just like that," I said. I lurched forward and grabbed his hand as it dangled at his side, jerking on it until he dropped to his knees on the futon in front of me. Unable to resist, I dragged a hand down his chest before letting it trail back up, watching the way he licked his lips and reveling in the way his skin felt under my hands, like silk stretched over stone or something, _anything_, my mind had begun to whirl and dance and tumble over itself as I stared at Hiei and, and the alcohol, that's what was doing this, it was—

"It's just that you have gorgeous skin," I heard myself say, voice coming to me from over a million miles away. "I think it's your skin, actually—I just, I just can't stop wanting to…"

My words rang clear and loud when I whispered: "How did I ever _find_ you?

He was staring at me one second and kissing me the next, forcing me back against the futon with the weight of his body. I clung to him, unable to help it as his lips pressed against me tight, and I did what I'd been wanting to do for a lot longer than I cared to admit: I buried my fingers in Hiei's hair, gently tugging at strands that felt like coarsely spun silk. He had very coarse hair, but it was smooth, and when I pressed my fingers to his scalp he growled low in the depths of his throat. He jerked his mouth away from mine and caught my ear between his teeth, and then he traveled lower and grazed his lips down the length of my neck.

"You _do_ belong here," he snarled into my skin, into the mark on my throat, into the place where his words meant more than anything. "You _fucking_ belong here!"

His heat made my toes curl and my belly clench. I arched up against him and tugged on his hair, guiding him back up so I could kiss him as much as I wanted to. I could taste the mint in his mouth, taste the evergreen and char of his scent, the scent I knew so well and the scent that seemed to by cloying into everything in my entire world, curling around me like some sort of cocoon—

Then, without warning, Hiei was pulling away. When I tried to follow, letting out a pitiful mewl of confusion, he pressed a hand to my chest and held me at arm's length. Hs eyes held an accusation.

"You're playing music," he said.

I blinked at him. "I am?"

He looked around; I did the same. What I saw made the clouds in my head slightly clear because around us swirled multi-colored lights that bled music from their cores. Soft peach piano tapped out a gentle, but beckoning, harmony above the violet thrumming of what sounded like a _sitar_, of all things, and the velvety blue bass wound in and under those sounds even as a crimson electric guitar wove its spell over it all, over the popping golden cymbal and a resonating… was that a _gong_ making the deep and spine-tingling shiver of sound just at the edge of my hearing?

Yes, I realized, it _was_, just as I knew that this was a song I knew quite well… only this version of it was nothing like the original, sliding in and around on itself the way a snake coils to keep warm, all soft lines and undulating curves and sensual slipperiness. I chuckled at the knowledge that this song embodied this moment completely, the laughter vibrating in my throat catching Hiei's attention as he knelt over me, one of his bent knees pressed between my thighs as he kept them parted, and his hand was still pressed to the skin above my breasts and below my collarbone, fingers splayed over my sternum as if to keep me from flying away… or from flying closer…

"_Come, as you are,"_ I softly sang to the music I'd subconsciously created_, "as you were, as I want you to be. As a friend, as a friend, as an old enemy…"_

I let my voice slip and slide up and down the notes, lingering breathily on the vowels and embellishing the parts I knew would be the most… seductive, was that the word? I'm not a sexy person, not by a long shot, but as I sang that song I stretched my hands over my head and arched my back, reveling in the way the music made my skin tingle and my limbs ache… and in the way Hiei was watching me with pupils so large they almost, _almost_ blotted out his cherried irises completely…

"_Take your time,"_ I almost purred_, "hurry up, choice is yours…"_

My eyes dropped to half mast, staring up at Hiei with a smile.

"… _but don't be late…"_

He licked his lips, watching me.

It was a dangerous game we played right then, Hiei and I—drunk as I was, I knew what I was doing by singing to him like that, I knew how every line of body and every word out my mouth resonated with a '_come here, I want you, I need you, _now_!', _and I knew that Hiei knew what I was doing because his eyes, oh, his _eyes_, they couldn't get any more intense as they traveled up and down me as I moved under him—I knew I was making a pitiful attempt at seduction, a tactic I had never thought of trying on the fire demon and one I had never expected myself to try and perform. I made no attempt to reach out to him with my hands and he made no move to do the same, so we just stared and as I just sang and let the music drive the moment, cradling it with lights that made Hiei's eyes almost glow and made the heat in the room echo their passion.

I reached the climax of the song eventually, my throaty singing turning rich and full and full of want, and when I let the high notes fly and drift, screaming, on the air Hiei growled in a twisted harmony, the hand on my chest pressing a little harder to keep me pinned because I had risen, curving up off the futon to draw more breath to sing, pushing myself toward him with more force than I'd so far used. Bold, I grasped the wrist of the hand on my chest, tracing my fingers up and down the inside of his arm where the skin stretched thin over his veins, sensitive, pliant, steely…

He hissed: "Stop this."

The music cracked and broke and disappeared, notes dying on my lips because Hiei's voice contained something raw—fury, I think it was, mixed with definite desire. I was out of breath and flushed, Hiei being much the same, and we stared at one another as the lights faded out and let the moonlight from the window take over once more.

"You're playing… a dangerous game," Hiei said, every word coming out clipped amid the sudden silence. "Don't tempt me. I know… you don't mean to."

_But I do mean too,_ I thought, and I said: "But—"

"I won't make Yusuke's mistake," Hiei snapped.

It was like he'd spoken the magic words. The sexiness I'd felt evaporated; in the span of a tenth of a second I remembered how I wasn't wearing pants, that I'd made a bloody fool of myself in front of Yusuke and Kuwabara, not to mention _Hiei_, and oh my god my hair must look a mess, and I'd just been writhing under Hiei like some sort of cat in heat, like a total _skank_, and_ oh my god what had I just done_?

Lost in my own insecurities and feeling smaller by the minute, I hardly noticed Hiei get up off of me and stand, turning toward the door and making to leave while I lay unmoving on the futon. It was only when his hand touched the doorknob that I lurched to my knees and said: "Hiei, _wait_!"

He froze and I suddenly felt cold, too. I wrapped my arms around myself, staring at Hiei's bare back and the way warm muscle fitted over his bones, longing for him to come back to me and to bring that warmth with him.

"Don't leave," I said, hating the way my voice cracked as if I were about to cry. I swayed in my spot, head spinning. "Please, just… Stay."

Hiei turned around, but he kept his hand on the knob. We traded uncertain stares for a moment—mine, a silent plea for him to stay, his, a look of indecisive conviction.

"I'll… I'll sing for you," I said, but his eyes grew hard so I added: "But, but not like _that_."

His hand dropped a little, mere fingertips touching the door.

"I'll do anything, for… you," I told him. "If you only stay."

I didn't mean for music to play, but it did. From somewhere inside me piano began to chime, its intention as insistent as waves on the shore of the sea, and Hiei was the moon drawing them again and again in his wake. Drums came in, backing the piano up with even more pleading and soulful need, and then…

"_Don't leave,"_ came a voice, _"'cause I believe we were meant to sleep in the dirt."_

Though simple and admittedly strange, the words carried so much weight. The singer crooned them like a lullaby mixed with a prayer, one filled with doubting love and hopeless hope, and I let the voice of the singer rise behind me because I was too busy staring at Hiei to sing the words myself, entreating him with my expression—

"_Don't leave,"_ the singer implored. _"Don't leave."_

"You think _I'm_ the one who'll leave?" Hiei hissed, words cutting under the lyrics in a dark refrain. "You're the pure one. You're the one who I'll corrupt. You're—"

The lyrics repeated, over and over again, under his words: _"Don't leave, 'cause I believe…"_

The language finally seemed to get to him. "Dammit, Dani, I am not going to leave!" he snarled. "So stop asking me to stay!"

The song dropped off in intensity, fading into a quivering strings effect that sounded like forlorn wind. Our eyes locked together and fused.

"_You're_ the one I worry about leaving," he rasped. "If I rush you, you'll go. You will. You _will_."

I had nothing to say to that—perhaps he was right, and perhaps he wasn't. Still, I had no intention of arguing the point because I knew my drunken words wouldn't be enough to convince Hiei otherwise, so I just got up and stood on my good foot. Hiei looked at me apprehensively, staring at my feet as I took one dragging step forward, stumbled, and somehow regained my balance. I spoke no words, content merely to hold his eyes as I battled my biology and tried to go to him.

The song, after all, said everything I didn't know how to say.

"_If you doubt that I'll be there,"_ were the lyrics, repeating over and over again in quiet reassurance as they rose out of the pliant strings, "_don't despair. Don't you dare."_

I took another half-hopping step, carting my bad leg behind me in my quest to get to Hiei. He watched my progress with unblinking eyes, and when I got close enough to actually reach out and touch him, my legs gave out under me—I wasn't supposed to try to walk without a cane, even if alcohol numbed the pain of my deformity. Hiei caught me before I fell, hands clasping my elbows tight as I put my hands flat against his chest.

"_If you doubt that I'll be there, don't despair. Don't you dare."_

We stood like that for a moment, still. I felt his breath on my forehead.

"I need you t' stay," I finally murmured, the words coming out fuzzy. "Do you need _me_ to stay, too?"

The hands on my elbows tightened.

"Do you?" I asked. I raised my head and pulled back to look at him. His eyes were troubled. "Hiei, do you—"

"I never wanted someone else," he snapped. "I'm _always_ alone. I _like_ being alone."

"… oh," I said.

Something flickered in his face, then, and I suppose something else flickered in mine because Hiei let go of my elbows… but only so he could wrap one arm around my waist and the other around my shoulders, pulling me flush against him with my chin digging into his shoulder.

"Fuck," I heard him growl. "Fuck, _fuck_!"

I patted his back. "There, there."

He stopped cursing, but his arms grew no less tight.

"This , this not bein' alone thing, it'll take some getting used to, I can be patient, it's OK, I can just go," I said, keeping my voice light as I babbled reassurances even though on the inside I was ready to scream—no, I _was_ screaming, because the man I loved had just told me that he liked being alone and he'd even implied that he didn't need me to stay, and didn't that mean that I meant less to him that he did to me, and—

_Wait._

With panic came stunning clarity. The hand patting Hiei's back… stopped patting. I stared over his shoulder at the shut door, hardly daring to breathe, suddenly afraid to move because _what_ had I just said to myself?

That… the man I _loved_…?

* * *

My mother always said that the things we say in passing are the things we truly mean. Offhanded comments tell you a lot about the person since they have no time to filter what's _really_ on their mind; on the other hand, a prepared speech can be over thought, twisted, and manipulated until it barely resembles the speaker's original opinion.

I hadn't prepared my talk with Hiei that night. I hadn't even prepared to get drunk—hell, singing him song after stupid song wasn't on the agenda either, no sir, but that hadn't stopped the music from reflecting what I was feeling in the moment down to every last nuance of my twisted-up emotions.

Did that mean my thoughts—the unscripted, unfiltered, and uninhibited ramblings of my imperfect, drunken, brave brain—were _also_ reflective of what I was really feeling?

Was I truly _in love_ with Hiei, since the notion of such a love had passed unheeded and accepted through my stream of conscious thought, until my logic somehow managed to take the reins from my tipsiness again?

* * *

My eyes stayed locked on the door, staring over Hiei's shoulder without blinking once. Was it because I was drunk that I had—that I had—

I had little to no peripheral vision, I noticed in a detached way, and the edges of my sight were wooly, dark, inconsistent… but the door in front of me, it was closed but I could reach out and open it if I wanted, if I only just—

"I think I need to go to bed," I said, trying to sound calm as the word _love love love love_ echoed inside my muzzy skull. "Mm still drunk, y'know?"

"What happened to wanting to stay?" Hiei said. I felt the words in his move chest when he spoke them.

"I'm tired," I said. Despite the alcohol in my system I felt remarkably sober, but tired? Far from it.

"You'll wake Ren," Hiei said.

I replied: "I'll be quiet. Like a… mouse." I giggled, almost hysterically. "I'm Pinky. Remember?"

If Hiei did remember, he didn't mention it. He only said: "Stay."

My heart shuddered at a faster pace, the insides of my wrists feeling feverish and hot. A wellspring of happiness made me suddenly feel bubbly, but I still had to know… "Why?"

A moment of silence passed. Hiei leaned back, hands sliding over my shoulders so he could grasp them and push me slowly away. His eyes searched my face, lips thinned into a hard line with brows lowered over half-lidded scarlet, and I took a deep breath when the fingers on my skin tightened almost imperceptibly, but Hiei did not speak.

"Why?" I repeated in a voice pitched just above a whisper.

He stared and started to talk, but stopped, looking for all the world like he had forgotten how to talk at all. Then, however, his face cleared for a moment as he stared not at me, but _past_ me, and then his eyes refocused with a glint and a look so sharp and purposed that I flinched back from him on instinct.

"You're tired," Hiei said to me, softly, but with that unyielding look still lingering jagged in his gaze. "Go to sleep."

_So he really _doesn't_ want me to stay,_ I thought, instantly feeling depressed. I didn't let my feelings show when I said "Thank you," and I tried to duck past Hiei with a hop.

That's not how it all went down, though: Hiei stepped smartly to the side and held out his arm so my ribs smacked into it and I fell forward, leaning over his arm like a towel over the arm of a snooty butler. My head whirled with the motion and I clung to his shoulder, twisting to grab on because if I didn't I would fall.

"Where are you going?" he asked, clearly confused.

"Uh… my room, I think?" I said, fighting down mild nausea. "Um, spinning…"

"Sleep in here."

The nausea turned to panic when I looked at how open and unassuming his expression was. "Wait, what?" I said, heart going nuts in my chest. "But, but sleeping—"

"I have a futon," Hiei said, looking away as if the admission embarrassed him. "It's… big enough."

I had no idea what to say. Hiei's arm was curled around my waist, holding me against his side so I wouldn't (presumably) fall over, and his idea of sleeping in the same bed made just about all of my other concerns (no pants, no cane, etc.) seem smaller in comparison to the thought of OH MY GOD HIEI JUST ASK ME TO SHARE A BED WITH—

My hesitation offended him. "You had no problem sleeping in a bed with _all of the_ _others_ in Demon World," he said, lips curling.

"But, but," I stammered, unable to fathom how to counter that argument.

"But what?" he insisted. "But _what_, Dani? I _matter more _than them, and that means I _get less _than them? Because your logic has been backwar—"

"_But what if I kick?"_

My blurted excuse made him stop short, pull back, and blink at me. "_That's_ what's wrong?" he said, gaping just a bit. "You're afraid you'll _kick me in your sleep_?"

I blushed, nodded, and didn't tell him the rest of the truth: That being so close to him in so intimate a setting intimidated me, even though I had earlier been trying to seduce—but let's not go there, shall we?

Hiei's consternation melted away, though slowly. Eventually he started to smirk. "You're the strangest woman I've ever met," he said.

I reached up to pat his too-warm cheek. "It's a normal concern-thing," I said, and I dropped the hand from his skin to cover my mouth as I turned away to yawn.

He didn't ask if I wanted to lie down; he just tightened the grip on my waist and lifted me off the floor, somehow managing to help my bad leg off the ground just enough for us to walk toward the futon like we were participants in a three-legged race. I sat down, slipping out of his arms with a giggle, and I sprawled onto the futon on my stomach, grabbing the _makura_-pillow and pulling it into my arms so it lay squished between my torso and the futon itself. I closed my eyes and snuggled into the _makura_, breathing in the scents that clung to it: detergent, cloth, and under that the very light tang of Hiei's own scent… it was faint, maybe he had never used this pillow before…

Hiei settled in next to me; I opened my eyes to find him lying on his side, one arm propping up his head as he looked down at me.

"Hi," I said.

"Hn," he said. He sat up to grab the folded comforter at the futon's foot. I sighed when he tugged it over me, but when he didn't make to put it over himself I shot him a skeptical look.

"What?" he asked.

I looked at the blanket, then back at him, and I raised an eyebrow.

Hiei grimaced, but he understood. With a jerk he pulled the blanket over himself as well, flooding the shared space beneath it with his warmth.

"Good boy," I murmured, shutting my eyes.

"I'm not a dog," he said.

I rolled onto my side, transferring the pillow to cushion my head. His skin looked like pewter in the half-dark, but his eyes…

"Your eyes look like cherries," I mumbled. "I keep meaning to tell you, but it's stupid."

"I hate metaphor."

That made me giggle. "S'a simile, smiley, thing," I said. I scooted toward him and cuddled up close, forehead resting against his sternum as I pressed a chaste, sleepy kiss to his skin. His breathing stilled for a second, as if he were holding it, and then his arm tentatively draped over my side. I smiled, enjoying how warm he felt and how close I was to him, tasting him on the air when I inhaled through parted lips…

"My heart's beating so slow…" I mumbled as my body relaxed, muscle by muscle, inch by inch.

"What?" Hiei said.

"My heart's… beating," I said, and in the next instant the weight of sleepiness crashed down.

* * *

A throbbing pain in my head woke me. I sat up, throwing something heavy and warm off my side as I did, and I pulled my knees toward my chest so I could press my face against them. The blanket tangled everything up so I threw that off, too, but the motion made me dizzy and I quickly put my head in my hands.

"Wuzzappenin'?" I ground out. My mouth was so dry that I immediately began smacking, trying to work up some measure of saliva with which to speak.

I flinched when something next to me moved, dropping my hands to see Hiei sit up. I would probably have blinked at him, stupidly, because I had no idea why the _hell_ he was there, but sunlight streamed in the window—wait, my room didn't have a window, did it?—and stabbed me in the eye.

"Where the hell am I?" I asked, rubbing my temples as I kept my eyes shut tight.

"My room," Hiei said.

My heart fluttered a bit at that, but I paid it little attention because my head was absolutely killing me. "Why?" I asked.

"You don't remember?" His voice was pitched soft and growly.

"No," I said.

He paused for a second. I concentrated on breathing. Then Hiei said: "We drank together. You did not want to wake your friend, and slept in here."

"That 'splains my hangover," I said, trying to cover my nerves—_I slept with Hiei all night? Did we 'do' anything? Did we—_

That train of thought led me to noticing something… something scary. I cracked my eyes open to check, and I shut them again when I realized that the scary thing was indeed happening, that I wasn't merely mistaken, _oh dear lord I wish I was mistaken_—

"Can I ask you a question?" I said, carefully enunciating as I raised my head and looked at Hiei despite the sunny window.

He cocked his head slightly, willing me to go on.

With a sweep of my eyes I took in the fact that he was shirtless; I swallowed, feeling panicky and tense as I asked: "Where are my pants?

His eyes popped open a little wider. We exchanged a long stare, one neither of us broke until Hiei said: "You spilled sake on them."

"Oh," I said. "And, I'm wearing your shirt, because?"

"You spilled there, too."

"Oh."

We kept staring for a little longer. Then, at the same time, we both started to say something, but seeing that this was the case, we both shut up.

"You first," I said.

"No, you," Hiei said.

"No, _you_," I said with a little force.

He stared at me. I stared at him.

"Do you remember—" he started to say.

At that precise moment, something LOUD cut through the otherwise silent room: A series of sharp cracks, like metal on stone, rapid-fired into my ears, making me cry out when my headache flared and pulsed in time to each deafening boom.

"_Dammit_!" Hiei snapped when the sound stopped. Peeking through my fingers revealed that he too was cradling his head in his hands.

"Wait, _you're_ hungover too?" I asked.

He glared, eyes on my neck. "No—but I can feel _yours_."

The booms started up again, reducing us both to silent, flinching balls of nerves.

"_Damn_ whatever that is—I'll kill it!" Hiei snarled when the noise stopped.

"No, kill _Yusuke_ for making me drink with his stupid favors!" I said, and with the words came a few brief flashes of my memory: Sitting with Kuwabara at the kotatsu, Yusuke making me play coins, and then of spilling sake all over my—

"Oh god_, I took of my clothes in front of them_!" I said, horrified. "Fuck! What do I do, what do I—"

"If they got as drunk as I think they did, you need not worry about them remembering the incident," Hiei said.

"Not with my luck," I said. I looked around for my cane on reflex, realized it wasn't there, and sighed. "Great. I left my cane behind."

Hiei looked uncomfortable (which basically means he didn't look at me, but at the floor). "You did," he agreed, and stood. "I'll go get it."

I was about to tell him thanks when my eyes were drawn to the bookshelf by the window. It was empty, except for the middle shelf, which only contained Hiei's sword in its customary black scabbard.

Looking at the sword, I said: "I could use—"

His eyes flashed. "No."

"But—"

"My sword. _Mine_."

"Did you skip school the day they taught you how to share in kindergarten or something?" I snapped, feeling grumpy and achy and, oh, not good, slightly nauseas. "Ugh. Never mind. Just go get my cane."

He turned to the door without a word and walked out of it, quietly shutting the thing behind him. The booming peals of sound—they sounded an awful lot like a jackhammer, to be honest—came to life once more, so I lay on my stomach and buried my head under the pillow to wait the sound out.

It ended after only a few seconds. I sat up, sighing, but then I jumped out of my skin because Hiei was standing over me with my cane in his hands.

"Did you run back?" I said, flabbergasted, but Hiei just shook his head and offered a hand to help me up.

"It was in the hall," he said as I got my feet under me.

I shot him a puzzled look. "Did I drop it?" I asked, but then my brow furrowed as more memory trickled back into my head. "No," I said slowly. "No wait…" I snapped my fingers and pointed at Hiei. "You picked me up and _carried_ me here!"

He looked away. "No I didn't," he said.

"Yes you did, I remember!" I said in triumph. "I was playing a song and you kissed me, and then—"

I stopped.

"Which means," I said slowly. "That _someone_ knew where I had gone and put my cane out there, knowing I had slept—"

Hiei's eyes came back to me with a snap, and narrowed. "Don't look so _happy_ about it," he said sarcastically, half angry and half Hiei-pouty.

I closed my opened-in-horror mouth and tried not to look as mortified as I really was. "Sorry, it's just… I don't know if I'm ready for people to know about us having a sleepover, OK? They might assume…"

Hiei only shrugged. "I don't care what they think."

"I _kind of_ do," I said, and with a grimace I walked past Hiei toward the door.

"Where are you going?"

"Bath, coffee, Yukina, then a nap," I said. "My head's killing me."

I was more than prepared to flee the room (I was getting more and more awkward about knowing that other knew I had slept in the same bed as Hiei by the second; his nonchalance wasn't exactly helping, either) but since I wasn't wearing pants… well, safe to say I didn't want people seeing me like that. After ascertaining that the coast in the hall was clear, I booked it to my room and shut the door behind me, sighing in relief when the dark of the windowless space closed around my body like water. The lack of light also eased the ache in my head, to a degree.

That degree was eliminated when the sound, the jackhammer sound, started flinging little knives into my skull, making up for the pain the dark had relieved me of, and then some. I sank down to the floor with my back pressed to the door with a moan, stopping up my ears with my fingers even though it did little good.

When the sound finally faded I sighed with relief, but then I flinched when Ren's voice floated to me out of the dark. "Where'd you go?" she said through a massive yawn. "I waited, but ya never came back."

"Oh," I said. "Oh, I um, I ran into Kuwabara and he wanted to talk. Sorry about that."

"S'OK," she mumbled, rolling over. I could barely see her outline in the gloom; the only light we had came from under the door. "Sing me a song."

"Ren," I said, crawling over to her so I could smooth her hair out of her eyes. "I need to get some coffee; I have a bit of a hangover."

She rolled my way; her arms twined around my waist, face pressing against the hollow between my ribcage and my hip with a contented sigh.

"No," she mumbled into my side. "No. Song. Please?"

My lips quirked—she was such a big baby, but I felt myself cave. What could one song hurt, right?

"Do you want a lullaby?" I teased, but she just nodded against me. I could feel her lips curl in a smile.

I thought about what I could sing her for a second, deciding on a sentimentally humorous favorite. Softly, I began to sing the words to one of Ren's much loved ballads: _"Every time I try to fly, I fall. Without my wings, I feel so small—I guess I need you, baby…"_

The song, even though it was meant for romantic love, fit me and Ren rather well. I needed Ren no matter what Hiei had to say about her—

I did not let a little tremor of uneasiness affect my singing. I had forgotten Hiei and I had fought about Ren recently; I needed to close that issue sometime soon, especially since my boyfriend… person… thing…

Ugh. I needed to decide on a title for Hiei, and soon.

And speaking of relationships lacking titles…

_"And even when I see you in my dreams,"_ I sang, frowning, "_I see your face, you're haunting me…"_

Koenma.

I hadn't thought about him much lately, not since he betrayed me back when he, Hiei, and I all met inside my soul. What did my relationship with him mean now that Hiei and I had solidified our own? Should I tell Koenma about me and Hiei? I mean, I still had feelings for Koenma (the nature of which kept changing like the curves of a rollercoaster) but did that mean I had to spell out who I was getting involved with to him? Would he even want to know? Did he know already?

I finished the song feeling troubled, but Ren didn't seem to pick up on my emotions. She just sighed against me and cuddled closer.

"I love that song," she said.

"You and your Britney Spears," I joked. "I've never quite figured out why you like her so much. She doesn't seem your style at all."

The arms around me tensed. Slowly, Ren sat up. Her hair was sticking up in the back, the silhouette vaguely resembling the Manhattan skyline, and her eyes… they were troubled. Why were they troubled? Were they spelling trouble for _me_, or for her?

"Britney _who_?" Ren asked.

Suddenly, the trouble was all mine.

* * *

_NOTES:_

_HA! FINALLY! BRITNEY SPEARS IS THE KEY TO THE UNIVERSE! SCREW YOU, 42!_

_This chapter was a battle to write. A BATTLE. Possibly an epic one. You have no idea what I went through to get this. I'm so sorry it's late, and the next one will be on time, I promise, but I was swamped with homework and then I, um, did "research". It's a whole big thing. Deets on my blog later today._

_Lyrics to more than one Britney Spears song are scattered throughout this chapter. Catch any?_

_Also, FT has a new summary. Your thoughts?_

_I've seen lots of fics assume that Hiei is a heavyweight when it comes to drinking, but look at him! He's so small! Unless he has the liver of Zeus, he can't be that good at holding liquor, which is why I came to a compromise. Alcohol gets into a demon's system quicker than a human's and affects them at a higher degree, but the effects wear off, too. So, Hiei can get drunk (REALLY DRUNK) and then sober up all the way really, really fast. It's a balance. Cool. Dani's not nearly so lucky since she's pretty dang human (more on that later, though there were hints in this chapter), and Yusuke's a half breed, so… yeah. _

_There are some REALLY specific songs in this chapter. The first is Amanda Palmer's ukulele-only cover of Radiohead's "Creep"; there are two live editions, though Dani's opening dialogue is based on the same dialogue Palmer speaks in the "Hungover at Soundcheck" version of the song. It's AMAZING. Check it out posthaste!_

_Another song, "Come As You Are" by Nirvana, is based on the version arranged by a contestant on the show The Voice named Rebecca Loebe. It's AWESOME, not to mention much sexier than the original. I hope she goes far in the competition. ^^ Her version of the song is available on iTunes, and also Hulu if you watch the right episode._

_The third song is a song I've been planning on having Dani and Hiei bond over for… well, maybe not since I first started the fic, but at least since I came to realize that Dani was meant for Hiei in some major capacity. It's "In the Dirt" by S. Carey, and seriously people, it's gorgeous. GORGEOUS. If you don't listen to it I don't know that you can get just how fitting it was in the moment it was played in this story._

_The last song, of course, is by Britney Freaking Spears._

_Love all y'all readers n' stuff! Lilmickey2008, Reiko Tsuchikake, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Supreme Baka, Procrastination Possum, Koryu Elric, nani san, Madame Blaze, WishingWanderer, Kai-chan94, Kaiya's Watergarden, spiritfoxxx821, Ry171819, colbub, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, NAO-chan33, Harpokatt, etowa-ru, Caralirani, Yoko Kiara14, anon, Merry Masquerade, TallyYoungBlood, yonet-chan, chocolateluvr13, OhhTaylorJade, Strawberry Slushie, archangel fighter, TeacupKitty, ephemeral violet, Engraved-Angel, j.d.y., DaAmazingMeepers, Michelle Mi-chan D, dramaqueen2, Mneme and Hearts, phantomxofxmystery, AkaMizu-chan, Strawberry Huggles, unknown player, rain chant, ShadowFireFox13, KayTeeCee, XxX!_


	69. Chapter 69: Fix You

Future Talk

Chapter 69:

"Fix You"

* * *

It took a minute for me to formulate a reply. When I did, it was a simple one.

"You know," I said slowly, "Britney Spears. The queen of pop?"

Ren raised an eyebrow. "I thought that was Lady Ga Ga."

"Um, no," I said. "It's definitely Britney Spears."

"Well, if she's the queen of pop, then why haven't I heard of her?"

I could feel myself start staring at Ren; my eyes opened so wide they almost dried out. Blinking rapidly, I told her: "You _have_ heard of her."

"No, I haven't," she said.

"Yes, you have," I insisted. "That song I just sang?"

"What about it?"

"It's by Britney Spears."

Ren pursed her lips, then licked them. "OK. So what?"

"So… you love that song," I said. "You said it yourself."

"And?" she asked.

My reasonings were so weighed down by horrified confusion that I could hardly string the phrases together. "And if you love it," I said, "you must know it… and if you know it… you must know it's by Britney Spears."

To which Ren responded: "Darlin', I ain't never heard that song before in my _life_."

* * *

Ren bought Britney's first album in, like, the third grade. She bought every album after that the minute it came out; 'Every Time' became her preferred lullaby, and '3' became her favorite party anthem. 'Oops, I Did It Again' was basically her catchphrase until I threatened to beat her over the head with my cane if she ever uttered the words in my presence again, and 'Hit Me, Baby, One More Time'—well, I don't think I have to tell you just how annoying that got on road trips.

When Britney Spears went on her 'Circus' tour, she happened to pass through mine and Ren's hometown during our sophomore year of highschool. Given that our hometown is a huge metropolis, this is somewhat normal—what _wasn't_ normal was that she was playing in an exceptionally tiny venue, one that only seated about 500 people and one that Ren was dead set on getting into. In a perfect display of her unyielding single-mindedness, Ren waited in a line for ultra-expensive tickets for almost thirty hours, skipping school to stand in the snow and the cold because she was absolutely, positively, 100% _obsessed_ with seeing Britney up close and personal.

She got two tickets, one for me and one for herself. We rented a limo and went to the concert in style, and Ren had the utter fortune of being in exactly the right place at exactly the right time and wound up having Britney Spears herself autograph the show's program. She had the program framed and mounted in her bedroom.

This is the same girl who claimed to me, with an utterly straight face and no deceptions in sight, that she had never heard of Britney-freaking-Spears.

* * *

"I don't understand," I said, hollow and feeling as though my words were coming from miles away. "How could you love that song if you'd never heard it before?"

She looked at me funny, like I was crazy or something. "I liked it 'cause you were singin' it, _duh_," she said. "I don't need any more reason than that."

"But—Britney _Spears_!"

"Yeah. No idea who that is."

"But… wait a second, what the _hell_, how do you know about Lady Ga Ga but not Britney Spears!" I said. Suddenly I felt angry—_really_ angry. My words snapped out. "And hey, even more than that, how the hell do you know _Time After Time_? Ren, that doesn't make any sense! You _love_ Britney! She was your all-time-favorite pop artist! You waited for _ever_ in the cold just to get tickets to her show—thirty hours, Ren, thirty hours in snow with nothing to eat, all for those _stupid_ front row seats! How the hell could you ever forget something like that?"

I shook my head, threading my fingers through my hair because what did it mean that she remembered two musical facts about our world but couldn't remember _Britney Spears_?—but then I had a brilliant idea.

"Hey, maybe you don't remember because you have amnesia, like me!" I said, grasping at the most obvious and least likely of straws. "Yeah! That's probably it!"

Ren, however, just shook her head. "No, I remember those tickets," she said. "Sophomore year, right? The only line I'd ever waited in for tickets?"

"Right," I said, not knowing where she was going with this. "That line was for Britney Spears."

"No, it wasn't," Ren said slowly. "It was for the Spice Girls reunion tour."

I gaped at her. She seemed troubled, leaning forward to grasp my hand.

"Are you havin' trouble rememberin' highschool, too?" she asked in a hushed voice. "'Cause you were with me at that concert, and it's not somethin' anyone'd soon forget, Dani. Scary Spice was extra scary-spicy that day."

I wrenched my hand out of hers and stood up. Without a word I grabbed my bag of bath supplies and a change of clothes, sitting so I could pull on a pair of shorts.

"Dani, I know it's scary to lose your memory, but—" Ren started to say, comfort dripping from every syllable—

I rounded on her. "I am not losing my memory!" I hissed. "There's no fucking way I'd _ever_ misremember Britney Spears! _You're_ the one who's wrong, and I'm going to figure out some way to prove it or so help me—"

"Dan—"

"No, Ren, NO!" I said, voice rising. She shut up, looking hurt, but I just turned and stalked out the door, saying over my shoulder as I went: "Give me five minutes, just _five minutes_ to figure this out or I'll go _crazy_!"

The jackhammer noises sounded when I went into the hallway; I cursed, grabbing my face in one hand as I slumped against the wall. Rage and adrenaline had made my hangover symptoms seem less intense in the wake of my conversation with Ren, but the sound was louder in the hall and adrenaline did little in the face of increased volume. When the noises stopped I went into the bathroom and stripped, turning on the shower even though every drip of water echoed like a shotgun blast in the tile-covered space. I brushed the taste of sour alcohol out of my mouth with relish, mind racing even though I was coming up with nothing, _nothing at all_ to explain how Ren's mind inexplicably missed any and all memory of one of the most famous American pop singers in history…

Because what the hell did all of this mean? Ren knew about Lady Ga Ga, Cyndi Lauper, and the Spice Girls, obviously, but she didn't know Britney _Spears_? I had been assuming until then that the YYH world's America's past and my alternate universe were the same other than this world's America's demise, but now…

_Wait._

_No,_ I thought mid-shampoo, freezing solid as a clue I had overlooked hit me. _No, not the same—they were _never_ the same! The technology of the pods sure as hell didn't exist in my world, so even before this music thing there was already something different! Why did that never occur to me?_

I felt horribly uneasy as soap dribbled into my eyes, making them sting. I quickly ducked my hair under the showerhead and began to rinse with fervent fingers.

_So if I'm to assume that my America and Ren's America are similar, but not totally the same,_ I thought, watching suds swirl down the drain, _I need to assume that some details of our lives changed from world to world, the existence of certain pop singers included. I have to watch what I say, or else she'll find me out. _

The impossibility of that statement struck me.

_But how can I watch _everything_ I say? _I thought._ What exactly do I need to hide? If I knew the differences, I would know what to not talk about…_

_Maybe… I should ask Hiei to read Ren's mind…_

As the last of the shampoo left my hair, I felt a light bulb go off.

"That's it," I whispered to the empty bathroom. "That's… that's it! If Hiei reads my mind and compares my memories to Ren's, he'll see the differences and believe that I'm from another world!"

Suddenly feeling quite chipper indeed—I mean, how often do you stumble upon the answer to one problem in the process of solving another?—I turned off the shower and went to the soaking tub, settling into it with a happy sigh.

My smile quickly faded, however, when I thought of something else.

_Should I tell Ren about being from another world?_ I thought. _I mean, I can't even be sure she'll believe me since there's no physical proof, none that she can't blame on me having missing memories, I mean, so… I still need proof if I'm to convince her I really am from another reality. I mean, she wrote a theory for going to other worlds in her notebook, but will that be enough?_

_No,_ I thought, slowly sinking into the bathwater. _No, it won't be enough… but what _would_ be enough? _

_And do I even want her to know I'm from another reality in the first place?_

The thought of Ren rejecting me on account of not being _her_ Dani made me go cold despite the water lapping at my skin. I shivered, wrapping my arms around myself, and felt the porcelain tub glide against my back as I sank lower into the warmth.

_It would be nice to have Ren as an ally, and Hiei I just want to believe me on principle, but… what if by knowing, they both turn from me?_

_And Hiei, especially Hiei… if he found out about Yu Yu Hakusho, he'd never forgive me for betraying his trust. _

_Maybe it's just best… to keep my secret, alone._

I hated the thought of doing that. Even though I knew avoiding the situation was probably not a good idea, I shoved the thoughts of telling Ren to the back of my mind for later contemplation.

"At the very least, I want to find out if it's just Britney Spears who's gone, or if _all_ of her songs are gone, too," I said aloud. "I mean, it's not like she wrote all of her music herself. Surely _one_ of her songs existed in Ren's past. Maybe the real writer sold it to another artist and a different singer sang it."

Satisfied to have found something to pursue while I decided on whether or not I should tell Ren the truth, I got out of the bath and dried off, slipping on clean clothes and tying my hair into pigtails as per their usual style. The jackhammer sounds appeared to have stopped, thankfully, so I went back to the room without any pain or pauses.

Ren sat right where I'd left her, staring down at her lap as though she were about to cry. Gently, I shut the door behind me and went to her, sitting by her side so I could lean my head on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," I said slowly, carefully choosing my words as I spoke them, "but I got freaked out when you didn't remember Britney."

"It's OK," she said through a sniffle.

"Thank you," I said. "But, Ren, can I _at least_ play a few more of her songs for you? Maybe they'll jog _your_ memory, or maybe you'll hear something familiar and be able to tell me what I'm remembering incorrectly."

She sniffed some more, thinking about my offer. Eventually she said: "That sounds good to me."

"Good," I said. I stood up and offered her my hand, which she took so she could tower above me. "Now how about we go find breakfast, and get to work?"

* * *

Yukina's cool fingers soothed the ache in my head within an instant. "Oh wow," I mumbled, and she smiled as she pulled away, taking all traces of my hangover-headache with her. "Thank you so much!"

"You are welcome, Dani-san," Yukina said. She picked up the kettle and poured me a strong mug of tea, handing it over with a smile. "Here. This will help as well."

We were in the main tearoom, the one with the fireplace where Hiei had read my mind back when I had first come to the temple. Yukina had fixed breakfast outside, making barbequed fish on the grill and steamed rice in an electric cooker. Tea she made on a small contraption not unlike a Bunsen burner; really, the woman could cook anything even without a kitchen and still make everything taste good. What couldn't she do?

"The two of you are actually the first ones up, besides Genkai," she told us as I sipped my tea (Ren tried hers once before making a sour face and setting it back down). "She had to be ready for the construction workers and never went to bed at all."

"So I really _was_ hearing a jackhammer!" I exclaimed.

"You were," she said. "Genkai called them in to rebuild the kitchen. They had to tear down the entire wall before putting in a new one, and they have to reinstall the plumbing and everything." She sighed, obviously wishing she could have her kitchen back. "You may go watch if you wish, though Genkai has requested that all displays of power take place at a safe distance."

"Yeah, scaring the civilians probably wouldn't be the best idea," I said, wondering: _Where am I going to play the Britney songs for Ren?_

Ren, speaking of which, was poking at her grilled fish and rice with obvious consternation. "Who the hell eats seafood for breakfast?" she asked, but I just pulled my own portion toward me and tucked in with a conspiratorial smile.

We ate while Yukina sipped a cup of tea, mostly in silence but not the bad kind. I only broke the silence to ask: "Where do you think I could get away with playing some music for Ren?"

Yukina thought about that for a few seconds, swirling her tea in its mug with little curls of her wrist. She had pulled her aquamarine hair back behind her neck with a blue ribbon that morning, one that matched the navy obi securing her opal kimono at the waist.

"The woods are an option," she said slowly, "but you should take one of the boys with you, just in case. The only other place I can think of is indoors, or in the heart garden."

"The _what_ garden?"

She looked at me, nonplussed, but then her smile was kind and apologetic. "You probably think of it as the mediation garden, and it is," she clarified. "It also happens to be the center of the temple." She chuckled. "I'm afraid my name for it is too romantic for Genkai's tastes, as well."

"No, the heart garden makes sense," I said, thinking about the place's quiet thrum of serenity. "The name suits it." What I knew wouldn't suit it, however, was the raucous sound of Britney Spears's thumping pop hits, so I felt I had to ask: "Would it really be OK for me to play music there? _Loud_ music?"

"Genkai occasionally takes a television out there to watch wrestling matches. I do not think she would begrudge you a small concert," was Yukina's reply.

I couldn't help but laugh. "Wrestling matches. Huh. That takes a weight off my shoulders."

"Speaking of which," someone said, and I felt a hand alight on my right shoulder. Startled, I jerked around to find Yusuke standing behind me, eyes squinted and hair mussed atop his head. His bloodshot eyes and the grimace twisting his mouth told me more than a little about the state of his hangover.

"Good morning, Yusuke," I said, but he winced and quickly flopped down onto the floor.

"Not so loud," he hissed, and then he said in a wheedling tone of voice: "Yukina?"

"Yes, Yusuke?"

He moaned: "Fix meeee! Pleeeease!"

She shot me a small smile and a warm look with her mirth-sparkled eyes. "I will try to fix you," she said teasingly, "but a hangover such as yours… well…"

The detective promptly curled up into the fetal position, arms crossed over his head as if to block out the sound of her voice. A low whimper drifted out of his curled body.

"You need to not drink quite so much," the ice apparition scolded as she moved toward him. It took a little coaxing to get him to uncurl, but when he did Yukina placed her hands on either side of his face. Pale fingers became coated in blue-green light, light that sank into Yusuke's temples and disappeared.

He relaxed when the light vanished inside of him with a sigh, flopping fully out into a sprawled posture. "That feels so much better," he said to Yukina as she hovered over him. When she moved off, he sat up. "I could run a marathon!"

"I would advise against it," Yukina said primly, but Yusuke leapt to his feet… only to have to sit down when he became dizzy. He lay back against the floor with his eyes shut tight.

"Dork."

I turned, once again startled by the new voice in the doorway. Kuwabara stood there, grinning at Yusuke's misery, and when I saw him I raised an eyebrow to punctuate my words, which were: "You're not hungover?" He looked quite fresh indeed with his made-up hair, clean clothes, and chipper smile.

Kuwabara shrugged. "Nah. I cut myself off after you left." To Yusuke he aimed a glower. "That one wouldn't let me cut _him_ off, though."

"Damn right I wouldn't," Yusuke said, cracking open one brown eye so he could glare at his friend. "Only pansies stop before they pass out."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Kuwabara said. "Yukina-chan, may I have some breakfast?"

Her smile was small, polite, and distant—she was only smiling because she had to, that much was obvious, as was the hurt look Kuwabara valiantly tried to force down beneath a faux-oblivious expression.

"Of course," Yukina said, and she gestured at the food. "Let me make you a plate."

I watched in silence, picking at my own meal sullenly. Yukina did her best to avoid making eye contact with Kuwabara; Kuwabara, in turn, did his best to force an interaction with her. The push-pull game made me feel awkward, almost pained, so I quickly looked to Ren for a distraction.

Despite not being a fan of early morning seafood, she appeared to have liked the meal enough to wolf it all down and lie back on the tatami mat floor, eyes closed with her hands folded over her stomach. Her eyes opened when I looked at her, almost as if she sensed my gaze.

"Ready to go blare some tune-age?" I asked her.

She was on her feet in seconds. "Am I _ever_!"

"Going to play with the music, Dani-chan?" Yukina said.

I nodded. "Uh-huh. See you all at lunch?"

"Of course."

I grabbed Ren's elbow and turned her to the door. Kuwabara, however, reached out and grabbed the hem of my shirt, saying "Dani, wait a second."

I looked down at him with a confused smile. "Uh, yeah?"

His eyes shifted first to Yusuke, and then to Yukina. "I need to, um… ask you something," he said.

Yusuke raised his head to look at us. Yukina stopped pouring tea to adopt a quizzical expression.

Realizing we had a sudden audience, Kuwabara added: "Uh… _Alone_."

His embarrassed expression gave me pause. I nodded, indicating he should follow me out into the hall, and although Yukina's curious face made me feel a little guilty about secrecy… well, Kuwabara seemed insistent on getting me alone.

"Yeah, don't include _us_, we're not offended!" Yusuke griped as we left, but we paid him little heed. The three of us—Ren, Kuwabara, and I—walked a little ways down the hall before Kuwabara stopped, eyes lingering on Ren before he turned my way.

"She can't understand anything we say," I assured him, and he swallowed.

"Oh, right," he said. "That's cool." Narrow eyes flickered to my cane, and then back up to my face. "So, um… you found your stick, then?"

_My stick…?_ I thought, and then: _OH._ The earlier shame of knowing that someone had known I had slept in Hiei's room shuddered into me in a millisecond, making my eyes widen and my palms break out in an instant skein of sweat. I slowly tucked my hair behind my ears, swallowing. "Oh, um, yeah. I found it." A long pause. "So… did _you_ leave it outside the… uh… the room I was in?"

He nodded. My panicked emotions must have showed in my eyes because Kuwabara was quick to comfort me. "I didn't mean to, you know, pry or whatever," he said, gesticulating with his hands. "I just, um, you left it behind and it's something you need, so I took it to your room but you weren't in there, and…" He trailed off so he could rub the back of his neck, cheeks taking on a shade of red more befitting an apple than a person. "I felt for your energy, and it was with… well, it was…"

The stress of having Kuwabara looking so awkward was too hard for me to bear; obviously, he was assuming things. "Nothing happened," I blurted, trying to ease the tension of the moment. "Between me and Hiei, I mean. I just didn't want to wake Ren, you know? So, well, Hiei offered a place to sleep, and…" My excuses broke like tired waves; I heaved a sigh and asked: "Does Yusuke remember anything?"

Kuwabara shook his head. The action flooded me with relief.

"He didn't mention anything this morning, and I assumed he would if he remembered," said Kuwabara. "I mean, he did drink himself to sleep, so I guess that's kind of to be expected, right?"

"Right," I said. _Hiei was right, then_. "And I'm glad you were the one to leave my cane out for me. Yusuke would make fun of me for years."

"He might," Kuwabara reluctantly agreed. He looked down the hallway to see if anyone was coming before telling me in a loud whisper: "And I, um… I put your clothes in the hamper."

I went cold all over, and then hot. Ren whispered: "Did things just get really tense, or what?"

"Uh… thanks for that," I said stiffly. "And, um… I'm sorry I acted like that. I just… you know me when I drink. I get…"

"Uninhibited?" Kuwabara supplied.

I nodded vehemently. "Uninhibited. Yeah. That."

Kuwabara and I fell silent, fidgeting. Ren looked between us in confusion and, if I was reading her right like I knew I was, she had started to get a little annoyed at not knowing what we were saying. She crossed her arms over her chest and started tapping her fingers against her elbows, licking her lips every few seconds as if she were gearing up to speak.

I beat her to the punch. "You're a really good friend, Kuwabara. Thank you."

"Aw, it's nothin'," he said, rubbing his nape again. "Just doing my part, is all."

"No, really," I insisted. "You're a great guy. And… well, I'm sure Yukina will come around."

Shocked, he drew in a quick breath before his face fell. "So you saw that in there," he said, voice low. "I know she's an ice demon, but it's not like her to be so cold."

"What's eatin' _him_?" Ren interjected grouchily. "Tell me! I'm tired of being left out!"

Her nosiness made me a little irked, but I quickly forced the feeling down. I mean, I _was_ leaving her out, after all, and I probably did owe her some sort of explanation…

"Just one second," I said to Kuwabara. To Ren, I explained: "You remember Yukina?"

Her blonde head bobbed emphatically. "Pretty girl who cooks?"

"The pretty _demon_ who cooks," I said.

"Oh. Right."

"Right. Well, long story short, Kuwabara is in love with her."

Ren's face immediately slipped into the landscape of sympathy. "Oh, you poor _thang_!" she said. Kuwabara looked quite rightly freaked out when Ren leapt toward him and pulled him into a bear hug. "You poor, sweet, darlin' of a man, she was givin' you quite the brush-off back in the breakfast room, wasn't she?"

"You mean you _noticed_?" I asked, stunned.

Her head—which had been resting on Kuwabara's shoulder—turned my way with a roll of her eyes. "Dani," she said, "I _know_ the look of a man in love with a woman who won't let herself love 'im back."

"You _do_?"

"'Course I do." I could ask her no further questions because she pushed Kuwabara to arm's length and held him there, catching and keeping his eyes with her own. "You fight you 'er now, ya here?" she told him sternly. "Pretty thing like that's too good to waste, and I can tell she has a spark in her for you. She just won't let it show."

"Uh… what's she saying?" Kuwabara said.

"She's saying she noticed you and Yukina, and that Yukina is too good to let go of," I translated. "And she says she thinks Yukina's still got something for you. Dunno how she knows that, but Ren's a fairly good judge of character, so…"

Kuwabara's face lit up. He grabbed Ren's hands off his shoulders and held them, smiling from ear to ear. "You really think so, Ren?" he asked. "You still think she likes me?"

Her hand went up to cup his cheek and give it a light pat. "I have no idea what he's askin' me," she said, though she said it in her comforting voice. "Tell him whatever will make him happy."

"She says she's sure everything will work out," I said, suppressing a giggle. "But I think we have to go now. Go enjoy your breakfast—oh, and offer to help her wash up the dishes, but don't come on too strong and don't crowd her, either."

Kuwabara backed up from Ren and beamed at me. "I'll be sure to do that!" he said, and before I had a chance to bid him goodbye he had run down the hall and disappeared into the tearoom.

I looked at Ren as soon as he was gone. She was studying the ground beneath her feet, kicking her bare toes at the floorboards the way a little kid might. She met my eyes when she realized I was looking at her, and she smiled.

"What did you mean when you said you knew what it was like to stare at someone who—" I started, but she quickly turned on her heel and grabbed my wrist, forcing me to shut my mouth so I could concentrate on walking.

"I wanna hear some more of that music of yours, darlin'!" she said. "Let's hop to it!

I was all for that (I'd have time to question her later, I was sure) but she was going the wrong direction so I had to stop her, turn our spastic train around, and head us down the proper hallway. A few false trails and about ten minutes later, I was able to locate the sliding paper door that led to the meditation garden.

It looked the same as it had when I visited it the first time: A square garden surrounded on all sides by red-painted porch and a miniature river, a corner dedicated to a small pond, red Shinto bridges allowing passage onto the sandy floor that filled the space up… oh, and the beds of plants that edged the water, plus the three boulders set in a diagonal line across the sand… I inhaled deeply; the air smelled of water and plants, and thanks to the temple surrounding the garden there was no wind to chill us. The air felt pleasantly cool on my skin; Ren gave a pleased laugh as she walked past me onto the porch.

"Isn't it great?" I said, looking at it. "I really like this place."

"It's beautiful," Ren said as she hopped across one of the bridges. "I mean, _really_ beautiful. These Japanese folk sure have good taste."

I winced as she walked across the sand; she was heedless of her feet as they disturbed the measure lines and whorls someone had carefully raked into being.

"Watch the sand, Ren," I said sharply.

The blonde looked at her feet in surprise, and then she jumped atop one of the boulders and peered over the edge into the miniature river.

"Hey! Goldfish!" she exclaimed.

I moved to the boulder nearest me, sitting on the porch so I could maneuver myself straight onto it without messing up the sand. "They're called 'Koi', actually," I grunted while I worked.

Ren blinked at me with her innocent blue eyes. "Are they for eatin'?"

I looked up in alarm. "No!"

"Phooey." She started to slide off her rock to come closer to me. "Well, the music—"

I held up a hand. "Stay over there, Ren. I need to concentrate to play."

She did as she had been asked and lounged atop the center boulder, pouting and idly playing with the hem of her shirt as I settled down, centered myself, and began to breathe long, slow, and deeply into my chest. It had been a while since I'd really had the time to meditate properly, and I rather enjoyed the process of finding the warmth of my power inside me, connecting with it, letting all other stresses fall totally away…

Not surprisingly, I felt Sweet's consciousness lying coiled around my own energy reserves as if she were lending me her own strength in order to protect them. Her presence enfolded me as I summoned music out of the dark of my own consciousness, purring happily into my ears as I reached out my hand-that-wasn't and touched the river of music-colors that began winding in my soul. It was as if her claws cupped the back of my hand, because they were suddenly small enough to do so, and when I drew out a strand of bright pink synth-pop she hissed a hiss of approval. She was, I could tell, just as happy about making music as I was, though she did not know much about the process of crafting a song. That was my job, and mine alone—but, Sweet knew a thing or two about manipulating energy, and she knew more than I did in that regard. When I tried to yank lilac strings out of my music river, she murmured at me to slow down, be more gentle, conserve my strength for notes that would be more difficult to harness…

I knew, without knowing how, that only a few seconds had passed in the real world when I finished crafting the song and let it fly into the air. My eyes opened to find Ren still sitting in her spot, only she was looking at the colored lights dancing on the air with her mouth open and her eyes held wide instead of the hem of her shirt.

"This song is called 'Oops, I Did It Again,'" I called over the sound of Britney's voice. "Sound familiar?"

Ren closed her mouth. Her eyes followed suit, lips thinning into a hard line. Then she shook her head.

I did not let that one failed song stop me, or even discourage me. I ran through just about every Britney song EVER after that, from the random ones on her earlier albums to the club anthems of her later career, and all of the ballads and all of the _everything_ I could remember I made sure to play for Ren. We were there for at least two, maybe even three hours, and although Ren liked all of the songs I played (she asked me to replay some of them more than once) she did not admit to recognizing a single one of them.

"I'm tellin' ya, I don't know this singer, Dani," she said at last. I was feeling ragged around the edges, tired from playing so much music for so long. "Why don't we stop for now?"

"I gotta find something you recognize," I gritted out.

But Ren just shook her head. "I don't know this singer. That's all there is to it. It's just…" She looked down at the hands folded on her lap.

"What is it?" I asked.

She looked at me, then at her hands, and then at me again, all shifty and hesitant and very much unlike Ren.

"It's just," she began, "well… it's just that there's no way you could have come up with all those songs on your own just now—I mean, I know you could come up with 'em if you had more time than you did today, but I… well…" She met my eyes, looking more than a little worried. "What if I _am_ missing memories?"

It took a minute, but then I felt guilty: HORRIBLY guilty. My zeal to figure out why Britney was missing from Ren's universe had inadvertently made her question herself, and a doubtful Ren… well, she wasn't good at handling doubt. She'd never been. It just wasn't in her nature.

"I'm sure _I'm_ the one who's missing memories, Ren," I said, trying to sound chipper and placating. "What are the odds that this singer is the _only_ thing you don't remember?" I paused, thinking about that. "I mean… she _is_ the only thing you possibly don't remember, right?"

Ren's nods were emphatic. "I remember everything else," she said, still nodding. "Our childhood, my research, the songs you wrote, all of it—just not that one singer."

"Then I'm sure I'm the one who's messing up," I assured her, an assurance which earned me a smile. "Don't worry about it. I'll figure it out somehow."

Blue eyes seem warm and deep. "Thanks, Dan," she said.

"Don't mention it," I said, thinking: _Ugh, if Hiei saw me defending her sanity like that he'd totally call me out on it. _I dipped into the music inside me for a second, pulling out one of the few songs I hadn't yet tried. "Just let me play out this last song; it's the only one I haven't done yet."

Britney's voice—a coopery shade of pink—bounced along the saucy lyrics as the song 'Trouble For Me' started to play. Although I was tired and feeling restless, I kept the tempo even and the volume at the same level throughout, exercising as much control as I could even when my breath start coming faster and faster to keep the oxygen powering my strained body. To Britney's voice I gave special attention; I was quickly learning that emulating a specific singer's voice was far more tiring than playing any instrument with my music-lights, because the uniqueness of the voice required special care and consideration to get sounding like the original singer's. Still, I thought I was doing a pretty great job of making the voice sound just like Britney, even when digital effects had to come in and distort her sound into something more close to an electronic voice.

I hardly heard the door to the garden open behind me, I was concentrating so hard on the music. It was only when the last verses of the song died down that I allowed myself to flop backward across the boulder, hair tumbling down its stony side, and look at the person standing there through my upside-down vantage point.

I found myself staring at none other than Keiko. Quickly, I sat up and spun toward her, heart jumping up into my mouth because _what if she's angry with me? Is she mad I cornered Yusuke in front of everyone else? Is she—_

She didn't _look_ mad; that was something. Her hair was damp as if she had just bathed and her makeup appeared fresh (_huh, is she wearing eyeliner?_ I asked myself, noting the way her eyes seemed more sparkly than normal); her clothes were pressed and neat, and her demeanor was calm, if not a bit subdued. I felt my heart start to ease off of its breakneck pace as I stammered a 'hello' and a 'good morning', and when she returned the phrases with her own versions, I felt it lighten up even more.

My pulse went right back to being erratic, however, when she said: "I didn't know you were a Supiro Hitani fan, Dani."

* * *

Su-pi-ro. Supiro.

Suh-peers. Spears.

Hi-ta-ni. Hitani.

Bri-ta-ni. Britney.

Yeah. I thought they sounded kind of alike, too.

* * *

The sound of the names being remarkably similar aside, I had no idea who the bloody hell Supiro Hitani was. I blinked at Keiko, feeling numb and more than a little confused, and then I said: "A fan of _whose_?"

One slender eyebrow quirked. "You were just playing a song with her voice, silly," she said, taking a step onto the porch so she could shut the sliding door behind her. "She has a really distinctive one."

"Does she?" I managed.

"Uh-huh. There's no mistaking it." Keiko took a second to brush her hair behind her ear. "She's only had one song come out so far, but she's shaping up to be pretty popular and I think she's got a good career in store." Then Keiko's eyes narrowed. "Speaking of which, she only has _one_ song. What song were _you_ playing?"

I gaped. Unable to formulate a response, I swallowed.

Her eyes went even narrower, though more with confusion than anger. "And… and was she singing in _English_?"

I started to deny that I had been playing in Supiro Hitani's voice. Really, I did. I started to tell Keiko that I had been playing a pop song from my world, that this was Britney Spears, that I had no idea who Supiro Hitani was—

Instead, I said: "I must have heard her on the radio last night. I thought I had… I thought I had made the voice up."

She appeared to accept this statement as true, face clearing of confusion in an instant. "Oh, OK," Keiko said. "And the song?"

"I… I wrote it."

"Wow, really?" She processed this, a hand coming up to touch her lips before she started smiling. "I really liked it! It's better than the one she has out right now!"

I swallowed the undeserved praise with a shaky smile. "I… I don't remember her song, actually," I said, covering my nerves by laughing. "Do you have a copy of it, or something?"

"Sure I do," Keiko said. "I have her CD in my room, I'll go get it—"

She turned to open the door, hand alighting on it with a smack, but then she stopped moving and sighed. A turn on her heel made her pleated skirt billow.

"I was actually coming out here to tell you that lunch will be ready soon," she said, rolling her eyes at her own forgetfulness. "I'll go get the CD and meet you inside? We're eating where Yukina served breakfast."

I nodded at her. "Sounds good to me."

I watched with eyes that barely saw anything as she slid the door open, thinking very hard about what it meant to find that a singer from my world—or, at least, a singer with an identical voice and eerily similar name—didn't exist in this world's past-that-was-a-lot-like-mine, but rather in its future-which-is-nothing-like-mine-at-all. I couldn't wrap my head around it! Was it just a coincidence that the name and the voice were so much like Britney's, or was something up with the alternate universe relationship that I just wasn't getting, or—

I was jolted out of my reverie by Keiko's surprised gasp. Eyes refocusing with a snap, I looked and saw that Keiko was staring through the doorway and down a little bit, though whatever she was staring at happened to be blocked by her body.

"Oh, Hiei-san," she said. "Good morning."

An answer came in the form of a noncommittal '_hn_,' but Hiei moved aside so Keiko could pass into the house first. She did so with a look cast back in my direction, one that asked if Hiei and I were OK, and I smiled before she vanished from sight completely.

He didn't come onto the porch right then, but in due course he did so. He did not greet me as he came to stand at the edge of the wooden walkway, staring at me as I sat on the boulder through inscrutable scarlet eyes. His mouth was drawn, eyes hooded, brow knit… it looked like he was trying to figure out a particularly complex puzzle, but he was only staring at _me_ so I did not understand what he was making such a face for.

Eventually, however, his look turned away from me—and onto Ren. I looked over my shoulder and saw that she was returning Hiei's expression, the two of them staring one another down as if having a mental discussion, but then Ren's face turned to something else. She was looking at Hiei the way two kings look at a piece of land they both wish to possess, all contained fury and unconquerable drive and…

My earlier wish to have Hiei read Ren's mind suddenly felt impulsive, and then it felt downright foolish when I remembered something I had not earlier thought of. _What if he read her mind and saw the five missing years of my double's life?_ I thought, feeling my heart beat a little quicker. _What would that do? I mean, would they hurt his opinion of me, or what?_

Uneasy, I turned back to Hiei and found him looking once again at me. I smiled sunnily, hoping he wouldn't think anything was wrong.

His scowl lessened in intensity a tiny fraction. "Tell your friend to go with the others," he said, voice booking little room for argument. "You, come with me."

My eyebrows shot up. "Um, why?"

He glowered.

"Because I don't like being ordered around, Hiei," I said. "You know that."

Still, he glowered.

I sighed when he did not say anything, not that I had been expecting him to say please or whatever—but, oh wait, hadn't I done that the night before? With the recovery of the memory of Hiei's inaudible plea I felt a little better about myself, so I stood up with a smile.

"Fine," I said. "I'll go with you." I turned to look at Ren. "Hey, Ren, Hiei needs to talk to me for a few minutes. Lunch is ready—do you think you can find your way back to the room we had breakfast in?"

I had fully expected her to fight me to stay nearby. After all, she was a stranger in a strange land with zero language skills, and Hiei… after seeing the looks they had been giving each other, I doubted she would do anything to make him happy. She was like that, you see—any competition for my attention made her snappish.

This time, however, she surprised me by not fighting at all. "What, you doubt me n' my impeccable sense of direction?" she quipped. She hopped up with a grin, slid off her rock, and dashed across the sand with a spray of white dust. I winced at the destruction, but then I let out a scream when she skidded to a halt at the foot of my boulder, reached up, and grabbed me by the waist so she could spin me onto the ground with her. A kiss on my cheek later—one punctuated by her looking over my shoulder at Hiei with a horribly evil grin—she said: "Love ya, darlin'."

"I love you, too," came my automatic response, and Ren hopped onto the porch so she could vanish from sight.

Hiei, meanwhile, was staring at me with eyes that practically smoldered. I stared back, saying as I crossed one of the bridges to stand on the porch beside him: "What's _that_ look for?"

"She kissed you," he growled.

"So?"

"She _kissed_ you," he reiterated. His fist was clenched at his side, as if maybe he wanted to punch something. "Why did you let her do that?"

"Uh, it's just what she does," I said. I fussed nervously with the hem of my shorts. "Is there a problem?"

"I don't like it," he spat.

"What, you want to be the only one who can kiss me?" I joked.

Hiei didn't get it. "I do," he said without any trace of irony. "Don't let her do it again."

My face turned stern. "Hiei, you know I only love her as a friend," I said. "That's what I tried explaining last night."

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye, face turned toward the garden even though his body faced me.

"It's not _your_ feelings I worry about," he growled at last, but before I could respond to tell him that he needn't worry about Ren, either, he had turned toward the door and taken a few steps across the porch. "Now come on."

I followed, uneasy and unhappy, but I didn't say anything because Hiei was walking very fast and I needed focus all my concentration on the effort of keeping up. The temple felt dark and still around us; I paid little attention to where we were going until Hiei abruptly stopped and I smacked into his back, instantly feeling his warm aura close around my body like water.

One red eye regarded me over his shoulder. "Sorry," I said, and I jerked my head at the door Hiei had led us to stop in front of. "Where are we?"

He looked away, hand moving out to grasp the doorknob.

The thing opened before Hiei could turn it, revealing none other than Kurama. Green eyes were unamused.

"Can you learn to knock, Hiei?" he said with a heavy sigh. "What if I had been busy?"

"You weren't," Hiei snapped. He reached back and closed a hand over my wrist, jerking me in front of him. I cursed when I almost lost my footing; I really _did_ curse when Hiei placed his hand over the small of my back and lightly shoved me into the room. It took Kurama to stop me from falling; he grabbed my shoulders and let me lean on him so I could regroup.

"What in the hell was that for?" I said once I had, rounding on Hiei (who looked bored more than anything) so I could jab my index finger at his chest. "You can't just push me—"

"Fox," Hiei said over my mounting protests. "I need you to examine her."

I fell silent, blinking at the fire demon in confusion.

"For what purpose, Hiei?" Kurama said. I heard him shift slightly; looking told me that he had backed up into the room and was gesturing for us to come inside. I hesitantly moved in, wary of Hiei as he came in behind me and shut the door so he could lean on it.

"She said something last night," Hiei said when we had gotten settled. "It disturbed me."

I rolled my eyes. "Look buddy, I was drunk; I probably said a lot of disturbing things—"

Hiei's eyes flashed in annoyance. "That's not what I meant," he said. He looked at Kurama. "She said her heart was beating slowly."

One red eyebrow rose as Kurama stared at his friend, incredulous.

"I checked, afterward, and it's true—she has a heartbeat!" Hiei insisted, obviously disturbed for whatever reason. "You should examine her!"

"Um, most living creatures have heartbeats, Hiei," I said sarcastically. "It's part of being alive; heard of it?"

"Woman," he growled, but Kurama held up a hand to stop him.

"He is rightly concerned, Dani-san," Kurama said. "Demons do not have hearts that beat the way humans' do."

I didn't do anything for a second, mind recalling with a pang how Yusuke's heart had stopped beating after Sensui killed him, an act that had awakened Yusuke's demonic powers so his non-beating demon's heart could work in place of his human one. 'My ticker isn't ticking,' I think were his exact words upon realizing that he didn't have a conventional pulse.

"So what does it mean that I _do_ have a heartbeat?" I said slowly. "If, if demons don't have one, and I'm a demon, then…"

Kurama smiled. "It's nothing to worry about, Dani-san. Rest assured, you—"

Hiei pushed off of the door with a low growl, feet striking the floorboards with loud cracks. "What do you mean, it's nothing to worry about?" he said, voice rising harshly. "It _is_ something to worry about!"

The warm and comforting words Kurama had given to me cooled considerably when he looked at Hiei. "I discerned that Dani had a heartbeat months ago," Kurama said slowly; Hiei's eyes went wide. "Genkai asked me to give Dani a physical shortly after she appeared among us, and I listened to her pulse on a whim. She has a human's heartbeat, though a flawed one with a murmur."

Hiei processed that for a second before saying: "So Genkai knew about this?"

Kurama nodded. "Yes. Koenma knows as well."

Cherry eyes turned crimson. "And none of you thought to inform me?" Hiei hissed, fists balling up into coiled hammers.

"As I recall," Kurama said, tone still very cool, "I attempted to share my thoughts on Dani's origin with you shortly after I gave her that examination."

"You _did_?" I asked.

Green eyes crinkled at the corners with a smile. "I did," Kurama said to me. To a tense Hiei, he continued: "You reacted defensively, claiming to hold no special regard for Dani and, therefore, no need to share in my findings." When Hiei started to deny this, Kurama forcefully interjected: "You claimed that you did not care for _repeatedly_, even _after_ I caught you putting her to bed when she drank herself to sleep at the hotel."

I looked at Hiei in shock, who was staring at Kurama and was very clearly livid. I hadn't known he'd gotten caught putting me into bed; I'd have to ask him about it later, because I really wanted to know what had happened!

"Things have changed," Hiei ground out from between clenched teeth. "You know that as well as I do."

Kurama cocked his head to one side, thinking. "Yes, I do suppose the mark on her throat is evidence enough of that," he said silkily, green eyes flickering in my direction, "as was your little rendezvous last night."

My jaw dropped before I could check it.

"It's difficult to keep your energies in check while drunk, I will admit that," he went on as if he were merely commenting on the innocent weather, "but next time, do try to keep to yourselves. I could feel your… ah, _intentions_ even from the distance of my room." His eyes slid my way, mocking and gentle and knowing all at once. "Especially _yours_, Dani-san."

I think it's safe to say that I was blushing like an overripe tomato at that point. I mean, who wouldn't be when Kurama was staring at the ceiling with a small smile on his face, clearly attempting not to laugh as he teased both myself and Hiei for all we were worth. He was just so coy about it—

I startled when I heard Hiei chuckle, the sound coiling low and dark and velvety in the base of my spine. To my utter astonishment he wasn't glaring at Kurama, but rather smirking at him through half-lidded eyes and body set in a lazy, almost satisfied posture.

"What are _you_ laughing at?" I choked out.

Hiei's smirk… got smirkier. "I told you we had nothing to be ashamed of," he said. "And if Kurama felt it, so did everyone else. Why hide it?" He tossed his head, bangs falling into his eyes with small sparks of blue when he looked to the fox. "I'm assuming it was _you_ who left her cane outside my room?"

When Kurama looked mystified, I admitted: "No. That was Kuwabara."

_That_ sure made Hiei's smirk fall to pieces. "The _oaf_ knows?"

"Well, he did witness you carry me off like a barbarian," I snapped.

"You carried Dani off?" Kurama said, wide-eyed even though I could tell he wasn't surprised at all. "My, my. How very bold."

"One of us had to take the initiative," Hiei said, tossing his hair once again.

"The initiative?" I parroted. "The initiative to _what_? I only slept in your room!"

"That's not what it felt like to _me_, Dani-san," Kurama admonished. "The emotion in that room… well, suffice to say it was intense."

I pointed at him. "You're insufferable," I told the redhead, to which he held up his hands in a don't-shoot-me gesture. "And anyway, can we change the subject _please_? We're here to talk about my heart!"

"I thought we _were_," Kurama said sweetly.

"Gah!"

He laughed, but he muffled it behind a hand. "My apologies. The situation was simply to entertaining to pass up. As I was earlier saying, you have nothing to worry about in regards to the state of your heartbeat."

"And why might that be?" Hiei wanted to know.

Kurama shrugged. "Dani is a shapeshifter, and her form is that of a human. She was also raised human, and she has for all her life believed herself to be a human. Given those factors, I would be more concerned if she _didn't_ have a heartbeat." His eyes went distant. "In fact, I would think that if her heart stopped beating, the physiological affect of such an occurrence might kill her. Mind over matter, as they say. If Dani believes she will die without a heartbeat, and if her heart stops, her mind might make her belief the true reality despite her demonic nature."

"What will happen if I take a nonhuman form?" I asked nervously. _Gosh, there's still so much I don't know about my own body…_

Kurama merely shrugged. "I have no idea," he said, unhelpful but also undisturbed.

"What if I'm hurt in this form and my heart stops?" I persisted, thinking of Yusuke's second death. "Will my demon side take over or something, or will I just die?"

"Once again, I remain at a loss," Kurama said. "Shapeshifters are a secretive bunch; I have only ever met one, and only for a short time. I do not possess the answers you seek." My face must have fallen, because he added: "Genkai might know something. You should speak with her."

"I might," I said, but I didn't really mean it. I really felt like talking to Koenma would be the better option, but… was I really ready to see him again? The thought made me uneasy, and—

A hand on my arm brought me back to reality. Hiei had touched me to get my attention, which I gave him as he said: "Let's go."

I nodded before bowing to Kurama. "Thank you for your help," I told him.

He smiled. "My pleasure."

Hiei and I left without another word, silently walking toward the tearoom where the others were (or, at least, that's where I hoped Hiei was leading us). I was distracted, busy pondering what the paradox of my heart meant as well as what talking to Koenma might entail, when Hiei said: "Does it really bother you?"

I frowned, confused. "What?"

He looked over his shoulder at me, face unreadable. "People know where you were last night," he said.

I swallowed, suddenly nervous. "Um, I just… I just don't want them to get the wrong idea, that's all."

"You mean, you don't want them to know you were with me."

I couldn't help but stop walking. Hiei took a few steps before stopping, himself, and when he turned to me I met his eyes with all the conviction I could muster.

"That's not it _at all_, you idiot," I hissed, hand tightening around the handle of my cane. "I'm not ashamed we're together. Far from it."

He looked far from comforted. "Then why don't you want people knowing where you slept?" he asked, coming toward me.

"I just don't think it's their business, OK?"

He took another step closer. "Why not?"

"Because it's just _not_!"

He had come so close I could smell him, at that point. "Why not?" he said, no, he whispered, and before I could lose myself in his eyes I shut my own and drew in a few deep breaths.

"Because I just don't," I said, forcing myself to stay calm. "I just don't want them to assume things about us based on where I slept."

"You mean, you don't want _Ren_ to assume things, based on where you slept."

I opened my eyes in shock, seeing Hiei's scowl hovering only a few inches from my face.

"You care for her," he said. "You don't want her thinking she has competition. That's why you don't come near me when she's around."

"Do I do that?" I asked, because I honestly hadn't noticed.

"Yes," Hiei said. "If she knew where you had been, she would be…"

He stopped midsentence, and I didn't try to complete his thought. Slowly, he licked his lips. I watched with bated breath, but he didn't move to say anything.

So, I took it upon myself to speak.

"Ren would be heartbroken?" I supplied.

Hesitantly, Hiei nodded.

In that moment, I understood. Hiei didn't like it when Ren kissed me because he thought it meant she liked me as more than a friend, and he thought I was trying to keep my relationship with him from her so her 'romantic' feelings would not get hurt. Both thoughts nearly made me laugh out loud—more than once during the course of our life together, people had hinted that Ren loved me as more than a friend, but that was just because they didn't understand her, not in the way I did.

"Hiei," I said, doing my best to sound neutral and calm, "Ren is not in love with me."

I saw his throat work as he swallowed. His eyes stayed locked on my face.

"She loves me," I went on, "but she's not _in_ love with me." I let out a low laugh, a frustrated one. "It's hard to understand, but Ren doesn't really differentiate between romantic love and platonic love. To her, love is love."

"I don't understand," Hiei said.

My lips pressed together in a not-smile. "You know how I talk about saving my virginity for the person I love?" I asked.

That got Hiei's attention like nothing else. He stopped breathing, looking alarmed.

"I'm saving it for the person I romantically love, but I can feel two kinds of love," I slowly explained. "Platonic love is what I have for people like Yusuke, or Keiko, or Kuwabara, or even Ren. I would do almost anything to protect them, and I can talk to them, and they allow me to be myself. It's the love of having friends, and companions, and people to rely on, but I don't tell them everything because I can't _give_ all of myself to them. Their love is complete in its own right, yes, but that kind of love doesn't get _all_ of me."

Hiei's voice sounded husky when he asked: "And the other kind?"

"That's romantic love," I said. A prickle crept up my spine inch by inch, because Hiei's look had turned hot and the air around us even warmer. "And that's… if it's _true_ love… it gets _everything_."

I think Hiei was about to kiss me. I mean, he _did_ come closer and he did have _that look_ in his eye, but I wasn't there to make out with him and turned, sighing as I took a step away and composed myself.

"Anyway," I said briskly. "There's also familial love, but I won't get into that. The point I'm trying to make is that Ren doesn't make distinctions between platonic and romantic love."

I turned back to Hiei, whose lips were pursed and more than a little unhappy. I continued speaking, not letting myself feel remorse.

"She's the type who puts everything into her relationships—meaning, if you're not as close to her as I am, then you're just an acquaintance," I said. "That means she gets possessive of me, but she's not going to deny me trying to have a romantic relationship of my own, either." I smiled at Hiei, who gave me an uncertain look back. "Her love is selfless. She'll let me go. You and me… we're in the clear, insofar as Ren goes."

I'm not sure where the conversation would have headed after that—after all, Hiei looked like he was ready to keep speaking since his face had drawn up into an intent mask of purpose—but we did not have a chance to pursue the topic further. Just then, you see, Keiko rounded the corner down the hall and spotted us, eyes lighting up as she walked over and stopped beside me.

"Hey Dani!" she said. "Yukina wanted me to find you, since you're late to lunch and all."

"Oh, sorry, we got to talking," I said, waving a hand to breeze the topic past us.

"I bet you did," Keiko said. She flashed a glance at Hiei before smiling at me. "Oh, and I brought you that CD you wanted!" she said, thrusting out her hand. I took what was in it on reflex, grinning when I looked down at the object to see—

Suddenly, I found myself holding something familiar.

Something_ too_ familiar.

Not there was anything wrong with the CD, mind you. It had come in a plastic jewel case, just like the ones the CDs came in back home, and inside of it was a song booklet, just like the ones that came with the CDs back home. It was just that the face on that booklet… well, that face was also _just like the one back home, _and that scared me.

Supiro Hitani had, you see, a face identical to Britney Spears'.

* * *

NOTES:

_Key to the universe. I'm tellin' ya._

_Ren's love distinctions play fairly large roles in her personality, so if I offended/creeped any of you out… I'm sorry, but Ren is Ren and Ren is really specific. She has to be to make some plot points work. Also, her sexuality might come up soon. If talk of it once again offends you, I apologize in advance._

_So I have an idea to put the YYH boys into a pirate-themed alternate universe. Anyone interested if I do?_

_I'm heading out to __**A-Cen 2011**__ in Chicago/Rosemont, Illinois tomorrow (Thursday)! I'll be there til Sunday, so if you're at the con, let me know and we'll go stalk YYH cosplayers together. ^^_

_Many thanks to the readers, without whom I would most assuredly be lost, confused, and lonely! Lilmickey2008, esprgirl, colbub, Koryu Elric, Kajihenge Yoko, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, StrawberryHuggles, Reiko Tsuchikake, TeacupKitty, Btch, TallyYoungBlood, Supreme Baka, Kaiya's Watergarden, Michelle Mi-chanD, AkaMizu-chan, spiritfoxxx821, Kai-Chan94, Anon, Eggbert3000, Procrastination Possum, etowa-ru, hieisdarkdragonchick, Mneme and Hearts, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Auro, AmoreVampiresv-v, Yoko Kiara14, Caralirani, Hiei08, NAO-chan33, j.d.y., SomeOtherPerson, chocolateluvr13, yonet-chan, ephemeral violet, Ry171819, KayTeeCee, OhhTaylorJade, TakaraRoseOizumi, UrieNanashi, Captain Lupin Feris!_

_Also, sorry about the general lack of replies to reviews as of late. It's almost finals week at my college, but soon it'll be SUMMER and I'll have oodles of time to thank you in person. ^^ Have a great week!_


	70. Chapter 70: Zombie

Future Talk

Chapter 70:

"Zombie"

* * *

I put my hands in front of me, tips of my index fingers and thumbs forming a teardrop that I looked through almost the way someone might look through a rifle sight. Indeed, I even shut my left eye (since my right was slightly stronger) so I could keep my vision sharp and clear as I readied, aimed—

—and fired a peal of pure bass energy, thrumming low and spinning harsh, liquid black, like magnets melted down that surged forward out of my hands and engulfed the rock in front of me from tip to top. The velvety black liquid-light shuddered for a moment before thinning into a fat coil and constricting like a snake, making the rock fragment and crumble into shards beneath the peal of purest sound. When the rock imploded into nothing but rubble and the black melted out of existence, I relaxed my arms and planted my hands on my thighs, bending over to gasp in a lungful of harshly cold air.

"Good," Kurama said when I looked up to him for an evaluation. He pointed to another boulder, green eyes glittering. "Now, again, but with treble."

I did as he instructed, as he had been instructing for the past six hours. My arms shook; sweat beaded on my temple despite the cold night air as I raised my teardrop scope and focused in on Kurama's chosen rock. It took more willpower than I thought I possessed to breathe deep and—without actually having to dip into theta—_consciously summon _a high and shrieking peal of hot, ferocious pink treble notes in a shower of bubblegum sparks. The sparks gathered in front of my hands, seeming to get sucked into the teardrop made by my fingers until they reached a critical, white-hot mass and shot out a laser-like beam of pink energy.

The beam struck the rock with a sound not unlike a scream, and then the rock _did_ scream when the beam drilled into it, spinning and screaming and using the high, tight vibrations of the treble notes to literally pound their way into the boulder. It took about a minute and a half of intense concentration and mental strength to keep the treble drill going long enough to actually pierce through the stone, but when it did it burst out the other side with a shower of dust. I quickly cancelled out the attack so it wouldn't hit any of the trees behind the boulder. As soon as I did, I collapsed forward again, hands on my legs and lungs crying out for oxygen.

Strangely, using my ability to summon music in order to attack something had the same effect on me as purely physical exertion. No one at the temple was quite sure why; Kurama thought it might be because I was using some unknown mental muscle to literally vibrate the particles in the air around me to produce sound, and that might somehow be back lashing into my own body, but he wasn't precisely sure.

Not that I was happy about that, mind you. If Kurama was uncertain about something, you knew it didn't mean anything good.

"With more practice," Kurama announced as I panted in my place, "you could probably move the drill's note up an entire octave. Then the vibration would be more powerful, and you could pierce objects more quickly."

I looked up long enough to glare; he was smirking. Kurama knew as well as I that the treble drill was at the highest note I was currently able to muster, a note so high-pitched that it made birds flee from the area and most demons want to kill me on reflex. Even Hiei had nearly bitten my head off when I tried to use the drill in the temple; that was why Kurama had suggested we move my practice sessions from the meditation garden to an area of the forest, one out of reach of Hiei's sensitive ears.

"Likewise with the bass," he continued airily. "If you lowered the notes even more, I am willing to wager that you could shake entire buildings to the ground." He paused. "With the volume increased, of course."

My sound-blasting techniques were based equally on pitch and volume. Sound, you see, is made by vibration: We hear the resonance of the vibration, and when the waves of vibrating sound hit our ears, you get pitch, notes, all that wonderful jazz, based on the speed of the vibrations. I harnessed the power of sound's vibration as a weapon, exaggerating the shaking notes and amplifying them until they were potent enough to do things like shatter boulders. The higher or lower the octave, the more exaggerated the vibration, and the more intense the attack. Likewise, the louder I made the sound, the more intense the attack, and the longer its range. So far I hadn't been able to touch objects more than fifteen or so feet away from me, but at first I could only touch stuff within about five feet, so making ten feet of improvement in as little as three days was actually something of a bragging right.

Speaking of which, "bragging rights" were how I—with the help of Kurama—found out how to harness sound as a weapon. Only by accident, of course. Oh, and speaking of accident, the whole Britney Spears thing? Yeah, I figured that out, too, by even more lucky chance.

It was just one of those days where everything perfectly falls into place, you know? Lord knows I hadn't had one of those in a long time.

* * *

When Keiko handed me the Supiro Hitani CD, I froze and stared at it for an unknown length of time before blindly following Keiko to the lunch room as I thought about the implications of seeing Britney's face not only in this world, but also in this world's time period and country. I mean, what the fuck, right? What in the hell was Britney Spears, of all people, doing ten thousand miles, years, and worlds away from her own, sitting pretty on the cover of a freaking CD?

Not that she was _identical_ to Britney Spears, of course. This 'Hitani' character was undoubtedly Asian. Though her facial features were all similar to Britney's, there was something subtly off about her. Perhaps it was in her black hair and dark eyes; perhaps it was in her caramel skin; perhaps it was in the almost imperceptible tilt of her eyes; I'm not sure. The fact remained, however, that her voice—when, after dinner later that night, I popped the CD into Keiko's borrowed Discman—was nigh indistinguishable from Britney Spears', and that her face and name were way too similar to Britney's for comfort.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. At lunch, you see, was where Kurama and I figured out the whole sound-weapon thing. Or, the concept of it at least.

And it all started with a zombie invasion.

They were metaphorical zombies, of course. To my knowledge there are no such things as in zombies in the world of Yu Yu Hakusho, though seeing the boys beat the living (undead?) crap out of a horde of them would probably be a sight worth its salt. Anyhow, just let me explain. After Keiko led us to the lunch room (Hiei followed without a word, though when I did look at him he seemed troubled by something) we all sat down and started eating the food Yukina had prepared. I hardly tasted anything I ate because I was far too busy staring at the CD and wondering just exactly what the hell it meant, and then Ren started bugging me about not being able to use chopsticks very well and I had to push all my doubts aside to deal with her. It was in the middle of molding her larger hands with my own that I started to actually pay attention to what was going on around me—or, more specifically, to start paying attention to what Yusuke and Kuwabara were bickering about. They were arguing much to the amusement of everyone else; the whole lot of my newfound friends was watching them wave their arms around and yell at each other in an entertaining fashion.

"I mean, I don't know why we're even arguing, anyway!" Yusuke was fuming through a mouth full of rice. "I could just take 'em all out with my shotgun, BLAM!, and we're done! Nothing to it!"

But Kuwabara remained unconvinced. "Remember when we had to beat up Suzaku?" he reminded his friend with a raised eyebrow. "And remember how he sicked those weird green dudes on us?"

"Yeah, so?" Yusuke said.

Kuwabara's response was cool. "So, we weren't exactly getting anywhere fighting _them_, shotgun or no."

"Hey, I've gotten a lot stronger since then!" Yusuke protested. "And besides, those were demons, or demon-things, or whatever!"

It was Kuwabara's turn to ask: "Yeah, so?"

"So, we're talking about _zombies_!" Yusuke said, slapping his fist down onto the floor next to him. "It's not the same thing!"

"Wait, you guys are arguing about a zombie invasion?" I blurted.

The boys looked at me for a second, as did everyone else.

"You mean you didn't pick up on that?" Genkai finally said. She seemed… amused, maybe, at my obliviousness (her eyes weren't narrowed, at least). "They've been going at it all lunch."

"Oh, yeah, sorry, I've been… distracted," I stammered. I turned back to Ren and addressed her in English: "Now Ren, you take the top stick and—"

Conversation slowly picked back up behind me. Sighing, I continued to explain to Ren how she was supposed to feed herself, but then I froze solid when Yusuke said: "Look, it's not even a real argument, anyway! If zombies invaded, it's obvious Dani would be the first to die!"

I dropped Ren's hands and wheeled on him. "What?" I said. My voice came out high, reedy, and affronted. "What the heck is _that_ supposed to mean?"

Yusuke was grinning at me; Kuwabara was looking at him with a face that said 'Oh, you're in trouble now!' When I looked at Yusuke for an explanation, the detective threw up his hands, brown eyes rolling in a 'duh' response.

"Well, it's true!" he whined. "You couldn't exactly out_run_ the zombies, could you?"

Rather than acknowledge that truth, I picked up one of my chopsticks and chucked it at him. "You suck!" I snapped. "Don't pick on the cripple!"

He dodged the stick with a yelp, then said: "Well it's true!"

"No it isn't!" I said as I threw my other stick.

He dodged it again. "How do you figure?"

"I don't have to outrun the zombies—I just have to outrun _you_!"

Yusuke snorted. "Fat chance of that."

"Not if I trip you," I stated casually.

Yusuke was the one to look affronted, this time. "You wouldn't!" he said, sounding hurt.

"Hey! You said I'd be the first to die!" I told him. "That means you wouldn't try to help me, which means I have to fight dirty to survive!"

As I spoke, Yusuke fumbled around behind him, and then he produced the chopsticks I had earlier thrown. With a grin he snapped them back at me far faster than I had thrown them at him; I was unable to dodge and got hit in the arm, and the sensation of getting stabbed through my sweatshirt made me yelp.

"Hey, it's not like you're _totally_ defenseless!" Yusuke said as he threw the other stick (one I actually managed to somehow avoid). "Your voice is so shrieky, I bet you'd make their heads explode!"

The dig on my voice made me pause, stunned. When I recovered, I was so insulted I could hardly speak. All that came out of my mouth was a started and upset "What?", a word that came out in what was probably the highest octave I could muster.

Unfortunately for me, the high timbre of my voice only seemed to egg Yusuke on. "Oh, totally," he teased. "I bet you could break glass. Why not zombie heads, too?"

I sought out Botan in the crowded room, looking for her to support me, but she was deep in a whispered conversation with Keiko and wasn't paying me any sort of attention. Sullenly I turned back to Yusuke, thinking of how I was supposed to come back from that, but Kuwabara had already come to my aid—I love that man, don't you?

"Yusuke, Dani's voice is only screechy when she's hurt," he said (although the defense seemed to insult me as much as it helped, I was willing to take it with only the smallest of scowls). "And besides, it's not like anyone actually can break glass. It's an urban legend."

"No it isn't," Yusuke said. "Opera singers can totally break glass!"

"I'm telling you, it's a myth," Kuwabara countered. "I read it in a magazine."

Yusuke merely rolled his eyes. "Oh, right, like you even know how to read."

I could see Kuwabara gearing up to really lash out at Yusuke for that—I'd come to learn that calling Kuwabara stupid wasn't something he enjoyed; it probably brought back memories of the days he never studied and was looked down upon by his teachers—so I instructed Ren to eat on her own and threw myself back into Yusuke and Kuwabara's conversation.

"Actually, it _is_ possible," I told them. "It's not even that hard if you have an amplifier and a good ear."

Yusuke looked elated; Kuwabara looked unconvinced.

"Seriously," I said. "Haven't you ever, you know—with a wineglass—" I began pantomiming rubbing my finger around the edge of a glass. "It starts to make that weird ringing sound and stuff?"

"Yusuke is quite good at that, actually."

Kurama's voice startled me. I looked over my shoulder to find him standing in the tearoom's doorway; I hadn't actually noticed that he had been missing until then, and as he greeted Hiei with a nod (the fire apparition was sitting next to the door, not eating with the rest of us) I shot him a quizzical expression.

"The few times we've taken Yusuke to restaurants that aren't ramen stands, he's put on quite the show," Kurama said. He came forward and sat down, smiling a little at Yusuke. "I dare say he could start his own band playing wineglasses, if he were so inclined."

"What can I say? I'm just a musical genius," Yusuke quipped.

Kuwabara cut in with: "What does ringing a wineglass have to do with shattering one, exactly?" He seemed irked by something, eyes narrowed and lips thinned into a firm line.

"It's just how sound and resonance work, that's all," I assured him. "People don't usually realize it, but sound is actually a form of motion—like, _literal motion_ that's almost too small to see. When you make a glass ring, you're actually vibrating the particles in the glass. Make it vibrate enough and it'll shatter."

"But you can do that with your voice?" Kuwabara pressed.

"If you're loud enough and exactly on pitch, yeah," I said. "Each glass has a unique resonant frequency that's set in place by the material of the glass and its shape and all that. If you can hit both the glass's frequency and resonance and all its harmonics exactly, the glass will start ringing—which basically means it starts vibrating. If you can vibrate the entire thing with enough force, it's totally possible to shatter it." I shrugged as I gave them a smug smile. "I have a friend who can do it. I don't have enough power in my voice to get loud enough to shatter a glass without an amplifier, but if I sing into a microphone, I can do actually do it myself."

A moment of silence followed this revelation. Yusuke muttered something about me being careful not to brag too hard, and then (much to my surprise) Kurama leaned forward to address me.

"How much have you tried experimenting with your musical abilities in an offensive manner?" he asked.

I blinked at him. "Only a little; why?"

His eyes narrowed somewhat. "Just a theory." I flinched when he stood up in one fluid motion, his hair fluttering around his shoulders when he did. "I'll be back in a little while. Dani, try to be finished eating when I return." Green eyes flashed as he turned his head. "Genkai, may I borrow you for a few minutes?"

The old psychic looked up from her tea, scowled, then put the cup down. She stood with a grunt and walked toward Kurama without a word, but when she reached him she stopped and looked down at me. Her hand dipped into a crease of her shirt.

"When I get back, I want some English phrases," she said. Her gnarled hand came out of her top; in it she held a small blue notepad, which she tossed to me. I caught it and saw that it had a pen shoved into its binding spiral; when I looked up to tell her that I'd be happy to write down some words, I saw that she and Kurama were already gone.

"Wonder what that was about," Yusuke muttered.

"Beats the hell outta me," Kuwabara said.

Everyone went back to eating with relative peace and quiet; I was not exactly hungry, however, so I flipped open the notepad. To my surprise, Genkai had already written roughly five pages of Japanese phrases in blue ink, and she had left room next to each block of text for a translation.

"What's that?" Ren asked as she craned her head over my shoulder. Rice clung to the corner of her mouth; she had abandoned chopsticks to use her fingers like a kid.

"Genkai wants to know a little English so she can teach you stuff," I said. I took the pen out of the spiral, uncapped it, and wrote down the translation (in Latin letters as well as hiragana so Genkai could actually pronounce it) of 'slacker'. "There are the words she wants to know."

Blue eyes went wide as Ren saw me translate the words 'sit up straight, blondie'. "She's not going to be very fun, is she?"

"She means well," I hedged.

Ren began to eat, but sullenly, obviously dreading what was to come. I finished up the notebook, stumbling over how to translate ethereal concepts such as 'theta' and 'soul', and then I added a few words Genkai missed—words like 'good job' and 'thank you' and some other helpful phrases, though the chances of Genkai actually using them were slim, probably. I also added a hiragana and katakana alphabet for Ren at the back, just in case she wanted to look up and use any of the words herself.

I was just finishing the katakana alphabet when Kuwabara spoke up: "Hey, Dani?"

He was staring at me, nerves making him smile a smile meant to tell me he was about to ask a favor. I carefully put down the notepad and folded my hands in my lap, shooting him a cheery smile in my best impersonation of a soulless bank teller.

"What can I do for you today?" I asked, cocking my head to one side.

He recognized that I was making a joke to put him at ease, and he sighed before asking: "Last night you played a song for me on the ukulele, and I've had it stuck in my head all night. Could I, you know, hear it again or something?"

My brow furrowed when I frowned. "What song?"

"It was a country song," he said. "You played it on your ukulele, but it sounded weird, so…"

"Oh, 'Shake It For Me'!" I said with a laugh. The memory had been fuzzy (damn you, alcohol!) until he explained and triggered a fuzzy recollection or two. I held up my hands and formed them into a position that made it look like I was holding a basketball. "Here, now you can actually hear the whole thing."

I quickly summoned up the instruments the song called for and began to play the guitar's intro. Yusuke immediately stopped eating and began to listen, eyes all narrowed and curious as he heard the unfamiliar influences that made the song pop more than the music he was used to, and Kuwabara actually started grinning.

When the singer started singing, however, his smile faded.

I watched his face fall with a sudden pang of worry. Had I done something wrong? Had I hit a sour note? I wondered about it until the song ended, watching with a little satisfaction the way Yusuke has started to dance in his seat to the upbeat tune, but then the satisfaction drained away when Kuwabara put a hand to his chin and started thinking, hard.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Oh, nothin'," he said slowly. "It's just that I wasn't expecting you to use Sumizu Nobu's voice, that's all." He grinned a little. "I mean, I told you I liked him yesterday, but I just wasn't expecting it and it caught me off guard to hear him singing in English."

And that, ladies and gentlemen, made the wheels in my head start turning.

I mean, it was weird, right? It was weird that right on the heels of learning that Britney Spears more or less existed in this time period that I stumbled upon _another_ voice that was identical to one from my own world, right? What did it mean? Did this Sumizu Nobu guy look like Luke Bryant in the same way Hitani looked like Britney? Was he also a pop idol doppelganger, or—

My musings were cut short by the return of Kurama and Genkai. Without any preamble, Genkai strode forward and grabbed Ren by the ear, hauling the protesting woman out of the room without a single ounce of mercy.

"Been nice knowin' ya!" Yusuke called after them, and sniggered. "Ren's gonna get killed."

Kurama was nicer to me than Genkai was to Ren, thank the higher powers. He smiled and offered a hand, helping me get to my feet with the question: "Would you mind if I tried directing your training for a time?"

I laughed. "I need all the help I can get."

"Very good." He turned toward the door. "Follow me, if you will."

I did so, smiling at Hiei as he watched us leave (he said nothing, however, and he still looked a little troubled, so I resolved to talk to him later). I tried not to feel nervous as Kurama led me through the maze of hallways and, lo and behold, right back out into mediation garden.

It had changed a little in the time I had been gone; I attributed this to Kurama's doing. He had set wineglasses, probably about ten of them, in a line on the edge of the porch. The glasses were made out of clear glass or crystal, with long, graceful stems and wide mouths that caught the glare of the noonday sun overhead. I spotted a cardboard box with tissue paper sticking out of the top next to the door before glancing once more at the glasses. Were even more of them in the box? What was Kurama up to, exactly?

"What are you planning?" I asked suspiciously.

He smiled, but it didn't touch his eyes.

"Your explanation at lunch reminded me of…" He paused, seeming to measure his words, and then he looked apologetic. "There is no way for me to be delicate," he said, "but it reminded me of when you attacked me after coming through the portal out of demon world."

I winced at the reminder. "I am _so sorry_ about that, really, I—"

He held up a hand; I held my tongue.

"I hold you no grudge," he said (though his words seemed too prim to be natural). "I merely think that the attack, which was admittedly weak, would be an effective means of offensive strategy should you ever have use for such a skill." This time, his smile actually did make his green eyes lighten just a bit. "After all, you have no offensive maneuvers at your disposal at this time. Isn't that correct?"

I gave a reluctant nod. "Yusuke was right. The zombies would eat me for lunch."

"Indeed they would," Kurama said. He gestured at the glasses. "Your treatise on shattering those at lunch made me wonder if sound—which, as you well know, is actually motion—it made me wonder if you could harness sound into an effective form of weaponry."

I thought about that for a moment.

"Hogosha certainly seems to think it works," I said slowly. "I mean, if I mimic her, I might—"

But Kurama was shaking his head. "No," he said. "Mimicry is never the answer to learning a solid technique. You must discover your own powers."

"And how do I do that?" I asked.

"Immediately. We'll begin here," he said, and he handed me a bucket.

I took the bucket—a rusted one made of silvery tin that had appeared out of nowhere—with a "WTF" look.

"That," Kurama said with a nod at the bucket, "is your saving grace."

"What in the world is _that_ supposed to mean?" I deadpanned.

Rather than answer, Kurama merely smiled, took the bucket from me, and set it upside down on the ground.

"You'll see," he said.

And so I did.

* * *

Basically, Kurama's a bitch.

Seriously. He's the single most exacting teacher on the planet, and this is coming from a girl who's trained with Genkai and Hiei. If it's not perfect, it's not good enough for Kurama, and if there's one thing I know better than my own name, it's that I'm the single most unperfect person on the entire PLANET.

Anyway, back to Kurama being a bitch. He had me stand on the rock nearest the porch and the glasses without the aid of my cane, using the bucket as a really awkward form of prosthetic leg. I bent my leg at the knee and then rested my knee on the bucket; this left my hands free to, as Kurama put it, 'visualize the objective' (he was full of (un)helpful little tips like that; seriously, the guy's a walking manual on being vague and infuriating). This basically meant I used my hands to aim, though why he couldn't have said as much himself I'll never know. Anyway, from that point, he would pick up a wineglass, tap it with his fingernail so I could hear the ringing noise, and then set it back down so I could summon the appropriate note and try (in vain) to shatter the glass.

It was a frustratingly difficult task. I could sing the glass's note on pitch without any trouble, but summoning the note with all the harmonics and frequencies intact was almost impossible for me because the process was simply too delicate and precise for the slap-dash state of my techniques. I tried to shatter the first glass for, like, I don't know, _an hour_ before I even got it to start _vibrating_ and ringing on its own. Getting the volume loud enough to actually shatter the thing—well, that process took nearly _two additional hours_, and by that time I almost too exhausted to feel triumphant when the glass exploded in a shower of crystal sparks. The wall of pink-ish sound-light I had been using to surround the glass also exploded, making my head swim and my eyes water.

"Didja see that?" I all but screamed, panting as I bent forward to catch my breath. "I did it! I actually _did it_!"

"Yes, and it only took you three hours," Kurama observed as he examined his cuticles. "I only hope your opponents are of the sedentary sort, or are very patient."

I glared at him as I began to slide off the rock. "Oh, shut up," I grumbled.

He looked at me with a cool eye. "Where do you think you're going?"

I froze with one foot on the sand and my arms clinging to the rock for dear life.

"You're not leaving here 'til you've broken all of the glasses," Kurama said as he picked one up and flicked it. The ringing clangor made my head ache. "Back on the rock. Now."

"But I'm exhausted!" I said, indicating my sweaty brow and soaked shirt.

"And you assume I care, because?" he asked.

My jaw dropped. Kurama smiled. I wanted to hit him.

Eventually I managed to recover my ability to move (thought I doubt I'll ever recover my dignity). "I don't even see the point in this," I snarled as I climbed back up and resettled the bucket. "I'm not going to be facing down hordes of wineglasses when we fight Seishou!"

This made Kurama's lips quirk. "No," he said, "but the basics are where the true power of your technique comes from. Shattering glasses is your equivalent of a boxer hitting a punching bag. If he knows the feel of a punch—"

"—then he'll be able to throw it in a fight, I get it," I grumbled. "Whatever. Just give me the next glass."

* * *

What started with me basically beaming a cone of sound at the wineglasses soon turned into me firing a more precise laser-line of high-pitched pink sound at the wineglasses (though the color did drift into the purple spectrum at times based on the particular glass's resonance). The laser struck the glasses dead on and shattered them on contact when I finally got the hang of it. By then it was past dinner (which I did not get to eat because Kurama was of the notion that hunger would 'sharpen your drive to succeed', the bitch) and it had grown quite dark in the mediation garden.

"Congratulations," Kurama said, clapping his hands together as he surveyed the broken glass strewn about the porch. "You have successfully broken half of your required glasses!"

I promptly collapsed atop my rock and pulled the bucket over my head. "Fuck my life," I moaned into the dark space. My voice roared in my ears when it echoed against the metal. "This is insane!"

I could hardly hear him when he said: "Would you like a break?"

I sat up and pulled the bucket off. "I'm not falling for that again," I said, giving him a dead-fish stare. He had asked me more than once over the course of the day if I wanted a break, and when I'd said yes, he had smiled and said I could rest once the glasses were broken. Did I mention he's a bitch?

This time, however, he didn't act like a bitch. "You may have a break if you so desire, Dani," he said kindly, and for a second I almost forgot the hell he had been putting me through. Almost.

"Oh thank GOD!" I said, flopping onto the boulder again. I could see a square patch of the sky above me, dusted all over with brilliant stars.

Kurama sat on the edge of the porch, carefully making sure he wasn't about to sit on any sharp shards before he did. He leaned forward from the waist and rested his elbows on his knees, fingers laced together so he could lean his mouth upon them. It was a very 'Kurama' pose, one I had grown quite familiar with over the course of the day.

What I _wasn't_ familiar with, however, was the look he was giving me. "Need something?" I asked when his stare—one characterized by intense concentration and the slightest edge of odd hostility—made me feel more than a little uncomfortable. "Or is there something on my face?"

His lips twitched with the ghost of a smile. "I confess to have been wanting to speak with you for some time," he said slowly.

I waved my hand. "So speak."

He didn't, not right away. He looked like he was about to a few times, but each time his lips parted he paused, seemed to think about his words, and retract them at the last second.

"You're usually pretty good at this," I remarked. "Y'know, the whole talking thing?"

A low chuckle. "I've been thinking about what to say to you for days," he admitted. "Now, however, I find myself at a loss."

I quirked an eyebrow. He smiled a smile that lacked humor.

"Can you at least tell me the subject?" I pried.

His response was immediate. "Hiei," he said. "I wanted to talk to you about Hiei."

My human heart started thudding just a little faster. "What about him?" I asked suspiciously.

Kurama wasn't meeting my eyes when I said that, but afterward he slowly looked at me. The green seemed to fold in on itself as we stared each other down, drawing me in even as something intangible and firm kept me from seeing too much in his gaze.

"What do you want from him?" he asked.

I startled just a bit at that, so caught was I in Kurama's look that the sound of the words made me flinch. I began fiddling with the hem of my sweatshirt, unnerved.

"You've been distracting him, is why I wonder," Kurama went on. His tone sounded as casual as a man remarking on the weather, but something underneath it made the hair on my neck stand up and shiver. "He is not easily distracted. I'm not sure I like what you're doing to him."

That made me freeze all but solid. Slowly, I looked up to find him regarding me with eyes so narrow I could hardly see that they were indeed green.

"So, my question stands," he said softly. "What do you want from him?"

It almost hurt to speak, but when I did, my voice was miraculously steady. "What will you do if you don't like my answer?" I asked.

His face, his tone, his body language, all of it was pleasant and all of it screamed at me to turn and flee, that this man was dangerous and wicked and I needed distance between us. "I'll be sure you don't hurt Hiei," came his response, one he punctuated with a smile. "How I do that has yet to be decided."

"Oh," I said, because I wasn't capable of much else. "Oh. OK."

"So will you answer my question?" Kurama said. "What do you want from Hiei?"

The question wasn't one I had really thought about. Sure, I had asked Hiei the same question only a few days before, but me? What I wanted from Hiei? How was I supposed to answer that?

It occurred to me, then, that I _really didn't_ _know_ what I wanted from him. I mean, I obviously wanted _something,_ because if I _didn't_, then why the hell was I dancing this dance with Hiei in the first place? I mean, the way I felt about him—

And that's when it occurred to me—in a flash of blinding insight—that the reason I didn't know what I _wanted_ from him, was because I didn't know what I _felt_ for him. The realization froze me solid.

"Well?" Kurama asked.

"I—" I said. I swallowed slowly, stomach churning into knots. "I… well, I…"

"Do you want him to protect you?" Kurama said. His tone was acidic. "Are you seducing him for his protection? Is that—"

Hot anger made the ice in my chest crack and melt. "Whoa there, buddy, I am _not_ seducing him!" I snapped. "And like I said to Keiko, I _don't_ want someone to protect me all the time."

"Ah," said Kurama, looking for all the world like he was about to agree with me, which made his next words even more biting. "So I suppose when you were _not_ seducing him in his room last night, all that energy I felt came from you, oh, perhaps merely having a cup of tea with him?"

My cheeks began to burn. "I was drunk, OK?" I said, looking at my hands just so I didn't have to meet Kurama's eyes.

"That's no excuse," Kurama said. "You're irresponsible with Hiei."

"Irresponsible?" I parroted, dumbstruck.

"Yes," Kurama said. "You've drawn him in. He is so wrapped up in _you_ that he forgets his own duties, not to mention logic in order to protect _you_ instead of the wellbeing of our group."

I floundered; was that true? "I didn't mean—"

"I know," Kurama said, his coldness abruptly turning to gentility. "You are unaware that you are leading him on, only to—"

Something about his phrasing made all my emotions come into perfectly sharp focus with a mental snap. My temper flared so hot I thought I'd incinerate Kurama when I looked at him. His eyes stayed maddeningly cool, like moss under a waterfall, whereas my words were full of fire.

"You don't know _anything_," I hissed. "Hiei and I agreed not to try anything like a real relationship until after we've cleaned up the whole Seishou mess because we both think it's just not the right time. If one of us gets killed, we'll have started something for nothing, so if you think I'm leading him on, then—"

"Are you in love with him?" he asked.

I stopped talking.

I stared at Kurama.

_… what?_

As abruptly as the ice had thawed, it seemed it could return even faster.

"It's a simple enough question," Kurama said with a polite smile. "Are you in love with him?"

My mouth worked. No sound came out. Then, a whisper of: "Why are you doing this?"

That seemed to catch Kurama off guard; red eyebrows jumped sharply before smoothing into their previously neutral line.

"Doing what?" he carefully asked.

"Interrogating me," I said. My voice gained force. "I mean, all of a sudden you just started accusing me and—and this isn't like you, Kurama. You're usually so nice to me, I just—"

"Dani," he said.

I fell silent.

"I have been turning these questions over and over in my head since Demon World," he said. One pale hand threaded through his thick hair, smoothing it out of his face. His eyes fell shut as he spoke. "Forgive my snappishness. It's just that this has been building for quite some time. I am afraid I simply cannot hold in my concerns any longer."

"OK," I said even though it wasn't.

His eyes opened; his lips thinned.

"I have wanted Hiei to find someone for a long time," he said. "I know you know of Mukuro, and though I know you don't know much about her, know this: She was not what Hiei needed. Hiei will tell you of her himself when he is ready, but you…" A long pause, one that made my heart start beating fast again. "You, at first… I thought you might be fitting."

"Really?" I asked, elated, and then my heart sank. What did he mean by 'at first'?

He nodded. "You are an accepting person, Dani." He looked at my foot briefly. "You have to be."

Though I wasn't sure that was true, I didn't say as much.

"Hiei, above all, requires patience and acceptance," Kurama continued. "In you, I saw those qualities."

"Me, patient?" I said incredulously. "You're joking, right?"

Kurama ignored me. "I thought you might be someone in whom Hiei could see a reflection of himself, and that much I believe to be true." Then his eyes narrowed. "I am concerned, however, with what it is you want from him."

Once again, I found myself rendered speechless.

"Though I know he would hate it, I am going to speak for him," Kurama went on with a squaring of his shoulders. "Hiei has come to view you as a potential mate. This is an honor some demons might kill for, and yet you seem to hold him at arm's length even as you pull him closer."

He took a deep breath with an apologetic smile.

"To sum up," he said softly, "I am worried that he has become more invested in you than you are in him."

"That's crazy," I said, speaking automatically and without a single thought to guard the words that came pouring past my lips. "That's _crazy_! I think about him all the time, I mean I just want him to be happy, and I mean I really do love—"

Kurama's eyes seemed to spark, and the spark ignited in me a fire. I cut the sentence off before the rest of it slipped out, clapping a hand over my mouth as I felt something inside my chest click into place before the rest of me flooded with warmth, like a thousand little tingling fireflies had made a home inside my skin.

And that's when I remembered.

As I slowly pulled my fingers from my lips, the hazy memory of what passed between Hiei and I the night before swam unbidden to my mind.

"I need you t' stay," I had told him in a drunken daze, and then I'd asked: "Do you need _me_ to stay, too?"

And I had felt devastated when he told me, "I never wanted someone else. I'm _always_ alone. I _like_ being alone," but nevertheless I had tried to comfort him, to tell him that it was OK, I'd wait for him to not want to be alone, but inside I had been crying because the thought of not being wanted by the man I loved—

Loved.

I had admitted that I loved him, hadn't I?

"Oh, crap," I said out loud, watching my shaking hands as they twisted around each other on my lap. Then I swore, loudly, and repeated: "Oh, _double crap_!"

This made Kurama's face contort into a mask of shock mixed with amused disgust. "_Oh crap_?" he mimicked, pitching his voice high to imitate mine. "You come to realize that you love someone, and your response is '_oh crap'_?"

"I didn't think I'd be making this realization in public, thank you _so much_!" I snarled at him. My hands dove into my hair, pulling at it. "Oh holy mother of Thomas Edison, oh _crap_!"

"So you _do_ love him, then," Kurama said, though it wasn't much of a question if you ask me. The anger and frustration and intensity in his face melted away after a moment of contemplation; his smile seemed to light the rest of him up until he glowed. "I will accept you love as an answer, and no, you need not fear dismemberment any more. If you seek Hiei's love… well. I can't find fault with that, now can I?" He chuckled low in his throat. "Though I must tell you, there is a rough road ahead of you. That demon will probably never admit he ever loves anyone, not even his sister."

"Oh crap," I kept saying, other words having flown far beyond my reach. "Oh crap, oh crap, _oh crap_!"

"Oh crap, indeed," said Kurama, but this time he smiled.

* * *

The rest of the night passed in a blur. Kurama let me go after that; lucky for me, he seemed to realize that concentrating would be an impossible feat when I had so much other stuff on my brain, and even more luckily, I did not run into Hiei that night as I bathed, changed clothes, and got into bed in my own room. Ren was already asleep (exhausted from her afternoon with Genkai, I had no doubt) and I spent most of the night tossing and turning (and, when sleep proved really elusive, translating song lyrics from English to Japanese) until I finally fell asleep. Yukina woke Ren and me up in what felt like seconds later; together we trudged to the breakfast room, where Ren sleepily told me about the hell Genkai had put her through the day before.

"She had me sit on a rock and mediate, just freakin' _meditate_ all the damn day!" she griped over a mug of strong tea. "And you know me, Dan—I can't sit still for the life of me! This sucks!"

"Uh huh," I said, preoccupied by the same thoughts that had caused me to get so little sleep. _What will I say to Hiei when I see him? Am I going to act differently around him? Is he going to know that I… uh, the 'L' Word?_ The worst thought of all was,_ Will Kurama tell him? Oh my god, Kurama better keep his fox boy mouth shut, or so help me—_

"Oh crap, here she comes now," the blonde moaned, and as the words 'oh crap' made me start biting my nails in agitation, Genkai dragged Ren off to parts and plots unknown.

When Kurama came and got me after that, I hastily threw myself into bettering my sound attacks. When I was able to shatter the rest of the allotted wineglasses with limited amounts of trouble (as task which took me about an hour; I was concentrating fiercely), Kurama stepped back and gave me a long, calculating look.

"Very good, Dani," he told me. I would have smiled had my insides not been in such a twist over the Hiei thing. "Now for the next phase of your training."

"Why do I get a bad feeling about this?" I asked myself as Kurama disappeared into the temple. A few moments later he returned with a huge box in his arms, one which he unpacked with deft fingers on the porch.

As it turns out, the box contained pots—metal ones, clay ones, and big glass ones, all of which had unique humming pitches that fell mostly into the bass range. Kurama basically had me repeat the glass-breaking training with those pots, only instead of harnessing bright pink energy into a high-pitched laser thing, I wound up manifesting the bass notes with pure, liquid black music-sludge that flew out of my hands and engulfed the pots like some weird lovechild of The Blob and Bach. It only took me until dinner that day to learn how to break enough pots to please Kurama, and after that he let me go have the evening to myself.

It was a relaxing evening, thank the lord. I somehow managed to avoid running into Hiei alone; with a buffer of people around, I managed to steer clear of blushing and stuttering and making a general fool of myself, and when Keiko and Botan and Yukina invited Ren and I to spend some girl time with them that night… well, I was happy to not have to face the fire apparition just yet.

And yeah, whatever, go ahead and call me a coward all you like, but I can't quite describe the way it feels to awkwardly love someone (ugh, I can hardly even look at the word without feeling nervous) as enigmatic and as fierce as Hiei. It's like loving a dragon, one who you can't tell is going to eat you or roast you or play nice for once. Every time I looked at him I felt my face heat up; it was like the effect he had had on me before my conversation with Kurama had only increased by, like, ten thousand or something.

Anyway, you might be interested to hear that the girl's night with Keiko, Yukina, Ren, and Botan actually led me to drawing some conclusions about the Britney Spears debacle—finally, right?

I spent part of our evening listening to the girls all giggle and talk (they avoided the subject of Keiko's breakup with Yusuke, I noticed) and the other part grilling Ren about all of her favorite musical artists. Working on a half-baked theory, I took all the ones I knew of that Ren mysteriously couldn't remember and started bouncing _those_ artists' voices off of Keiko to see who she recognized, and from this testing I drew an interesting conclusion.

Basically, it goes something like this: Some artists I'm familiar with existed in the past. Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper, for instance, did exist in the America-that-was, as evidenced by Ren's knowledge of them. Their songs existed, _they_ existed. Simple.

The trend I've found, however, is that the artists that _didn't_ exist in the America-that-was, exist _today_, in the Japan-that-is. Their names have changed, but their faces, their voices—those have transcended time and reality. Supiro Hitani _is_ Britney Spears; Sumizu Nobu _is_ Luke Bryant (or so I assumed since at that point I had no picture to compare to my memory of the man in my world to the man existing in this one).

It made some sort of warped sense. Everything must exist somewhere, and since those musicians were in my world, it only made sense for them to somehow be in this one. I'm sure some artists I know of haven't even been born yet, but I'm sure they will be eventually. Maybe I'll meet one; maybe I'll sing with one; who knows?

One thing I do know, however, is that none of the artists in this world know the songs they sang in mine, and this gave me something of an idea.

* * *

The next day was the first day Kurama actually mixed up the training a little bit. Instead of setting the pots on the porch for me to smash, he moved me onto a rock that was farther away from him and decided to, um… make the training more proactive.

Oh, to hell with delicacy. He upped the ante by chucking shit at me.

I'm not kidding—and Kurama's a bitch, remember? He literally started picking up glasses and pots and throwing them, telling me to hit and break the objects before they hit _me_. I wound up with more than a few cuts on my legs when Kurama's missiles struck the rock under my feet and shattered, but thanks to the pain of this I quickly learned how to determine an object's resonance on the fly. Threat of bodily harm is good incentive to improve, after all.

When it became apparent that I was becoming adept at breaking pottery, Kurama called the proceedings to a halt and came up with a new torture method—I mean, a new training regime.

"I have determined a few things about your abilities," he said, bidding me rest (for once).

"Do tell," I said, voice laced with sarcasm as I felt myself bake beneath the noonday sun overhead and the heat of my own exertion.

He ignored my crass attitude. "The higher the note, the more destructive the attack," he said slowly. "The lower the note, the more destructive the attack, and the louder the note—" He paused in order to chuckle. "When you get angry, the music grows louder, and the destruction of the glassware gets more… interesting."

"Pots are the enemy," I deadpanned.

Kurama gave a delicate 'ahem'. "In any case, I think we are at the point where we can safely move on from shattering crockery. Try using your powers on one of the boulders in the garden."

My brow furrowed. "But rocks don't have resonance," I said. "How can I—"

"Music is motion, remember?" Kurama cut in. "If you can make the pitch and volume intense enough, I am certain you will be able to interact with more than just silverware."

And that, my friends, is when I started pulling notes so high that even dogs would have trouble hearing them out of thin air, which resulted in Hiei dropping out of the sky and demanding, sword drawn, that we take our infernal racket somewhere else. I stammered more than a few apologies and fled, blushing like mad, into the woods with Kurama leading the way, where we spent the rest of the afternoon and well into the night practicing my newfound techniques.

Everything seemed like it was going well after that. Though I was still too nervous to actually speak to Hiei face to face just yet, I had picked up a new power—an imperfect one, one I still needed to work on—and Kurama was actually being nicer to me. It was as if my admittance of emotion had allayed his fears for Hiei's safety, and that in turn allayed his suspicions of me being a horrible person, or something. When Kurama deemed me well trained enough to go back to the temple for the night, we walked through the darkened woods in companionable silence.

"Are you looking forward to the festival?" he thought to ask when we could see the temple lights flickering through the trees ahead.

I'd actually forgotten all about it, to tell the honest truth, and I said as much aloud.

The admission earned me a chuckle and a green-eyed smile. "We leave day after tomorrow," Kurama said conversationally. "You should start packing soon."

My heart gave a loud thud at the thought of leaving the Book in the temple with nothing but the SDF—a team whose track record, might I remind you, was less than stellar—for a guard.

"Before we leave, however, there is one last thing I should like to teach you," he said as the temple came into view. "Hiei and I discussed it last night."

My heart beat even more quickly. "Did you, now?" I asked, feeling a blush rise to my face and chest at the mere mention of Hiei's name.

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. "I did not tell him of your feelings," Kurama said softly, but with humor. "I merely suggested that he and I would be the best teachers for instructing you on giving your Salamander a corporeal form, should you have the strength to do so."

I stopped dead in my tracks.

"You mean," I said, stunned, "that Sweet could—"

"You could summon her in a manner similar to Hiei's summoning of the Black Dragon, yes," Kurama said with a twinkle in his eye.

The prospect of having a body made Sweet shiver excitedly in my back; I was equally enthused, but I still couldn't help but ask: "And _you're_ a good teacher, because—?"

Kurama took on a longsuffering expression. "I might not have a Dragon inside me, but I do have another… entity, who occasionally I give form," he said, sounding a bit hurt.

"Oh," I said, and I didn't ask any other questions because Kurama's eyes warned me not to. "Well, that's cool, I guess."

We had reached the porch by that point. Kurama walked up its steps ahead of me, waiting until I managed to climb the steps and stand next to him before asking: "I shall see you tomorrow morning, then?"

I dipped a quick nod. "Sure thing. 'Night."

We parted ways, me with more than a little haste because oh my GOD, was I tired! I all but fell into bed after my bath, sighing into the quiet dark as Ren snored away on her futon.

"Today was a good day," I decided, mumbling the words into my pillow as I tugged the blanket over my shoulders. I'd learned a new technique to Kurama's satisfaction, I had figured out the Britney Spears thing the day before, I had successfully avoided Hiei ever since Kurama's prying made me admit to feelings that I wanted to keep hidden…

"A… good… day…" I mumbled once again, and my eyes fell shut and stayed there.

However, my good day was not to bleed into a good _night_, because someone in my dreams had designs I wasn't exactly happy to be a part of.

* * *

NOTES:

_ I utterly hate this chapter. I swear the next one will be better._

_As more than one reviewer has pointed out, recently FT has seemed like filler, and they're right, it does, though since after this filler comes the end of Future Talk as we know it… well, this is the only chance I have to tie up some loose ends, so it's a necessary evil. I guess try to have faith in me or something. I don't know. I'm kind of incapable of being optimistic at this point._

_ Anyway. So I went for summary over detail with Dani's training because, frankly, it's just not very interesting and I'm more interested in when they go to the festival, anyway. I'm thinking y'all are, too._

_So the explanation for as to why I went inexplicably missing for almost three weeks will be posted on my blog-thing soon, and if you're interested in seeing a snapshot of the chaos that currently characterizes my life, head on over in the next day or so for an emo freak-show of epic proportions. There's a link on my blog. I changed the URL because I thought the old one was stupid. I've been changing a lot of things lately because I thought the old ones were stupid. It hasn't really been working out. _

_ It's been rough, y'all. It's been real rough. As in, two cross-country trips in a car that's falling apart and keeps getting flat tires in the middle of nowhere kind of rough. Again, deets on the blog at some point in the next day or so. Or something. I don't even know anymore. _

_Title credit goes to The Cranberries. Reflects my state of mind at the moment as a bonus. Yeesh._

_And many thanks to my readers, most of whom treat me far more kindly than I deserve on any given day. KayTeeCee, , spiritfoxxx821, Takara Rose Oizumi, Mneme and Hearts, TeacupKitty, colbub, MusicFiend666, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Reiko Tsuchikake, Lissa's Guardian, ephemeral violet, Kajihenge Yoko, Ry171819, Yoko Kiara14, Snowgirl7589, Yanza, Silverwing013, Kai-Chan94, TallyYoungblood, Strawberry Huggles, chocolateluvr13, flamingmarsh, nani san, Kaiya's Watergarden, Pirazz, Procrastination Possum, phantomxofxmystery, NAO-chan33, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Bitches Be Crazy, Thread Magic, yonet-chan, spiritfoxxx821, Angel of Randomosity, Mi-chan1991, Willowleaf2560, Captain Lupus Ferus, Koyru Elric, Btch, Madame Blaze, LadyoftheGags, xxx, Inu-Angel Z, DanzaPalooza, madman42, LupinePhyre909_


	71. Chapter 71: Bring Me To Life

Future Talk

Chapter 71:

"Bring Me to Life"

* * *

Predictably enough, Sweet found me first.

Her massive head and even bigger body made me feel like an ant standing before a python. Even though I knew that the salamander had the attitude of a puppy (when she was alone with me, at least) I still felt more than a tad intimidated when her head dipped low and I found myself staring straight into her gold-white eye, an eye that was a long as I was tall and reflected my naked body like a living mirror.

"Hey, baby!" I cooed as I carefully scratched above her slit nostrils. I knew she would like that even before she began to purr against my hand. "I haven't talked to you in a while, have I?"

The lizard burbled in agreement. Her red-glass claws gripped at nothing—the dream-world around us was featureless and black, after all—but I could still feel the pressure of her motion against my face, a wind without air. I stumbled forward and fell against Sweet's receptive muzzle when her tail lashed to coil behind me, coming to rest about six feet behind my back as if she were trying to build a wall around our conversation.

"You are _way_ too big," I complained, and when I met Sweet's eyes after shooting a petulant glance at her disruptive tail…

Something clicked between the two of us. I stared into the reflection of my eyes, the reflection that hovered inside her own gigantic iris, and then the world around us seemed to ripple. The black of my pupils grew darker than the night sky in an instant, pinpoints of utter shadow that seemed to suck the world in on themselves and make it shudder at the edges of my vision…

It seemed like I stared into my eyes—eyes that were as much Sweet's as they were my own—for an eternity, but then I jerked my gaze away and shook my head to clear it. Hair tumbled about my shoulders, tickling me.

"What the hell?" I asked, rubbing my temples. "Sweet, what was—"

Her burbled answer cut me off, and the sound of it was… smaller, somehow. Higher pitched, clearer, closer…

I opened my eyes.

Before me, Sweet had shrunk.

"Huh," I said with dazed interest. I mechanically noted that Sweet's body—while still the size of a house—was worlds smaller than her earlier miles of seemingly endless coils. Whereas before her eye had been as big as my entire body, it was now only the size of my head or so, making her skull as long and wide as me from the hips up. I could easily wrap my arms around her thinned neck—and in fact, I did just that when she silently urged me to give her our first real hug. I felt her coil her sinuous neck down over my shoulder to rest her head between my shoulder blades. Her throat thrummed against my chest, where it was pillowed; her shoulders started at about my knees, Sweet's low-slung body and tail trailing off into the distance behind them. It was much easier to actually see the beast when she was on an understandable scale. Before, she had been almost too big to even comprehend.

"How the heck did we manage _that_, I wonder?" I said out loud.

Sweet pushed away, head arching above me like a brachiosaurus. With a giggle I realized that she resembled (at least in the neck and head) a particularly flexible long-neck dinosaur, although her body was more reminiscent of a snake's with added legs, paws, and claws.

"Combined force of will, maybe?" I said aloud. Then, with whimsy: "Wonder twins, activate! Yeah? Like that?"

Sweet didn't look particularly amused. She merely heaved what sounded like a sigh and coiled her body in a gigantic circle, tailing coiling around and around us since it was so long. She stretched her neck out along the ground in a gentle arc; I knew without being told that she wanted me to sit with her, so I did, resting against where her neck met her shoulders. A minute later she had moved her head around and set it on my lap. She was almost too heavy for me—almost—so it took a few tries for us to get settled in a comfortable position.

"You're like an overgrown dog, you know that?" I said. When she made an offended noise, pure hurt radiating to me over our connection, I clarified. "I mean, you like being loved on."

She was OK with this. I smiled as I stroked her nose and the bony ridge above her eye, looking on with amusement when I petted her neck. The skin there was loose and dry and scaly; I could literally grab a fistful of it and pull the white flesh about six inches away from her body. When I pressed the skin closer to her, I could see that underneath the white was a brilliant, crimson red color that only showed when the translucent outer skin got close to it.

"You were all red when I met you," I told her as I experimented with her skin. "Now, you're mostly white. Why's that?"

I comprehended her explanation intuitively, since she did not use words: The outer skin, the white and scaly one, was a dry, protective layer, and under it was a slimy red layer. The red layer could secrete boiling liquid that filled the outer skin up like a balloon, turning it to bright red. This only happened when the Salamander was in danger, or was angry or otherwise emotional, and when I had met Sweet she had been all of those things. Now, however, she was calm and at rest, so she was mostly white except for the pinkish patches where her bones and posture made her two skins press tight.

"Ren would go nuts over your biology," I told her.

Sweet's response was to send me an image of Ren complete with a background feeling of love and contentment, all alongside an offer to be Ren's willing test subject. She trusted Ren as instinctively as I did, it seemed.

"I… haven't exactly told her about you yet," I felt I had to admit, and when Sweet seemed crestfallen I hurried to add: "It's because she doesn't really believe in all of this magical stuff yet. I'm keeping it simple, so she doesn't get confused."

_But you _will_ tell her about me some day, right?_ Sweet seemed to be asking. A large amount of sclera showed around her pupil; I think she was making Bambi-eyes (eye?) at me. It was hard to tell.

"I want her to know you, so of course I'll tell her," I said.

Sweet seemed elated, and then… well, then she turned sly. An image floated to me over our connection, and then came another image, and then another, and then another.

_ And him?_ she seemed to be asking when she sent me a barrage of Hiei-s. _Can _he_ know me, too?_

The fingers stroking the lizard's brow went still without my consent. I felt my face heat up, and when I didn't say anything Sweet lifted her muzzle and nudged my cheek with it, hot breath misting out of her nostrils. My eyes went dry; I blinked to moisten them.

"I dunno, honey," I said, voice shaking just a smidge. "I mean, I want him to, but the way he thinks of the Dragon… I just don't know if Hiei…"

I felt Sweet's sadness for just a second—and then her mood changed. Abruptly her head snapped out of my hands and looked off behind us; with a silent flex of her muscles she wriggled her neck under me and forced me to stand. I stumbled forward with a curse, thinking I was going to fall until I remembered that my feet were both whole in my dreams, but I put out my hands regardless to catch myself—

—and I found them pressed to warm cloth. Hands encircled my wrists to steady me, but I wrenched myself away and stumbled back against Sweet who was hissing at the intruder and whose skin had gone from translucent white to flaming red. Her ruby-red teeth glistened, her head snaking down to hover over my shoulder; when liquid dripped from between her scaly lips and fell to touch my skin it felt pleasantly warm, but something told me that it would not feel as good to someone Sweet was not a fan of.

Koenma eyed Sweet with a critical expression, but he did not look particularly scared of her, not even when she feinted forward and hissed a mere inch or so away from his face. The spirit prince merely raised an eyebrow at her before leaning around to meet my eyes.

"Hello, Dani," he said, tone hovering halfway between perfectly polite and utterly awkward. "It is nice to see you again."

"Hi," I said, lost for words as I looked at him. He looked exactly the same as he had before—only, he didn't, not at all, and for some reason I caught myself staring at him in a way I never had before. Before, he had looked ragged, but perfect, handsome and debonair and in-control despite his tattered clothing and dusty skin, with eyes that held wisdom and courage and strength that I could draw on, but now…

Now, he looked lost. I could see him fidget as he regarded me, waiting with bated breath for me to speak, and it struck me in an instant that his face was too thin, his hair too long, his eyes too bright.

Why had I ever thought of him as perfect, when he so very clearly wasn't?

Why had it taken me so long to realize that this man was just that—a man? He might have been a demigod, but he wasn't all powerful, and for some reason…

"Hello, Koenma," I said, suddenly finding myself feeling much, much braver than before, and feeling more in control around this man than perhaps I ever had, besides. "What do you want?"

He looked hurt when he pushed his hair out of his eyes. "To talk to you," he said as if it was obvious (which I suppose it was). "I wanted to ask—"

"Let me guess," I interjected. "You wanted to know if I was still mad at you for abandoning me to Hiei the last time we talked?"

His guilty expression said it all.

"The answer is yes," I said. I reached up to touch Sweet for support, even though I didn't need much of it—where had my sudden confidence come from? "Hiei thinks I'm nuts now, and I'm blaming you for that."

This seemed to startle him. "Why me?"

"Because you were my proof," I said. "You were my proof, and you didn't back me up."

"You could always tell him about Yu Yu Hakusho," Koenma supplied.

I snorted before snapping: "Yeah, and have Hiei never trust me again because I know his back-story without permission? No, thanks!"

Koenma didn't say anything for a few moments, looking at me through narrowed brown eyes as if waiting for something. I turned away from him to pet Sweet, who kept her eye fixed on Koenma despite my proximity to her. I could tell she didn't trust the man very much, if at all. Were those her own feelings for him making her eye go narrow and her skin go red, or was she reflecting my own bubbling anger? For the life of me, I couldn't tell.

"Why does it matter, what he thinks?" Koenma said at last.

I had forgotten where the conversation had gone; confused for a second, I said: "Who thinks what, now?"

"Why does it even matter what Hiei thinks?" Koenma said.

I gaped at the man. His mouth thinned into a sheer line. Sweet's low rumble of a growl faded off into astonished silence, her lack of sound mirroring my stunned absence of thought.

"You mean you haven't been watching me?" I managed to get out eventually.

Koenma's stern expression didn't change, but he did get a little more… guarded, I suppose you could say. Like he was hiding something.

"No, you _have_ been watching me," I guessed, and I knew I guessed right when he flinched. "Which means you must have seen what happened between us."

Brown eyes went all but black when they narrowed, but they did not narrow in anger. He looked as if I had quite literally stabbed him in the gut with a rippled blade; _why was he so sad,_ I wondered, _when he had only known me for such a short while? Was he really that upset over me?_

"You and I—" he started to say through tight lips, but for the second time that night I cut him off.

"'You and I', nothing," I said. I turned away from him. I didn't want to look at that face anymore; it made me feel guilty despite how resolute I felt, despite how my voice sounded so damn sure of itself. "There's no 'you and I', there's no 'we'—you lost me the minute you lied to me."

That wasn't exactly fair of me to say, I'll admit, since Koenma had been lying to me from the start and I had started to fall for him at pretty much the beginning of my whole adventure, but he knew what I really meant: He knew that he had lost me the moment I realized he had been deceiving me on my origin, and my purpose here, and he knew that I knew he was still keeping things from me, and that I would not stand for that.

"And you lost me for sure when you left me, last time," I said, tossing my hair as I referred to him denying that he was the real Koenma in front of Hiei. "That _definitely_ got you into my bad books."

I looked at him, then, and felt my breathing jerk inside my chest. His face changed when I said that. I didn't know why. One second it was full of unconquerable sadness, and then… then, it changed to panic. I could see the white all around his dark irises, and if I didn't know any better, I would say that his already pale face had gone so much paler beneath his dusty skin.

"Are you OK?" I heard myself ask. Compassionate to the end, it seems.

The prince swallowed. Sweat had beaded on his upper lip and brow.

"If there is no 'us'," he slowly said, "what _is_ there?"

That took me aback for a moment. "Between you and me?" I asked after a few seconds, gesturing with a hand between us both.

Koenma licked the salt off his lip. "Between you and _anyone_," he said, tone emphatic even as it sounded pained. "Between you and _Hiei_."

I started to ask: "Why do you want to—"

He cut me off. "Tell me," he said, and when he took a step toward me Sweet dipped her head in low, arching her neck between us like a moat of sinew and scale. He stopped walking, barred by her body, but his words continued. "Tell me what there is, _anywhere_."

When I started to voice a complaint, he pinned me with a glare. I wasn't used to seeing those from him and faltered.

"I need to know, Dani," he said. The pain crept back into his manner. "Please. Please, I need to know."

I considered this. Then, I accepted it, even though I didn't like that he was once again keeping something from me.

"You've been watching me," I reminded him, slowly, and when he nodded I said: "Then you've seen me and Hiei."

"Yes," he said.

My eyes fluttered shut for a moment. "We talked, once, about how he's… a firestorm," I said, trying to recall that long ago conversation in Demon World. "And how you're a cool breeze, and how he… moves me."

"I remember," Koenma said.

"Well, you were right," I said. My eyes opened. "He _does_ move me. What I feel for you, it's a totally different color for all the crazy things I feel for Hiei, and—you're calming and wonderful, but he's—he's _Hiei_, and I think—I think I'm in love with him!"

The words, just like they had the other two times I'd said or thought them, slipped out like my lips were oiled, and the minute they did I clapped my fingers over my mouth and had to look away. Koenma, his face had contorted into ache so raw, that—

To my surprise, I heard him grind out the words: "That… could work."

I didn't know what he meant. "What could work?" I asked, furtively glancing at him, but he wasn't looking at me. He was staring at the ground, lost in thought and his pained expression… but under the pain I saw something else begin to bloom, and I did not understand it.

Why in the world did Koenma look… hopeful?

"It's nothing," he said, although I knew it was a lie. He was holding something back even as gave me one of the most intense looks in his repertoire and said: "It's just that if you're going to love him, love him with everything you have. Don't hold back."

"I wasn't planning on holding back," I said. His tone—one that seemed utterly sure that I _would_ hold back—put me immediately on the defensive.

"But you would," Koenma said. He shook his head, tips of his hair grazing his cheeks and the curves of his lowered lashes, ones that looked like crescent bruises on his pale skin. "You _always_ hold yourself back."

"No I don't!"

His look was patronizing, but kind. "You held yourself back from _me_," he said.

"Only because Hiei…" I began. Then, I shook my head, because what was the point? I merely promised Koenma: "I won't hold back. Not from him."

He took that in for a moment, measuring me up and down.

"It's very important you don't hold yourself back," he said. "It would be had you chosen anyone, but it's _especially_ important since it's Hiei."

His words puzzled me. "Had I chosen _anyone_?" I repeated.

"Your favorite was always Kurama," he said gently.

I pursed my lips."True, but he's way too pretty in person, and I can't keep up," I said. "I'd get an inferiority complex. Hiei is much more… real, to me." I forced a genuine smile, which probably is some sort of contradiction but I don't want to think about it too hard. "But you're right. Holding back with him won't get us anywhere, so… I won't hold back, OK?"

"You're sure?" he pressed.

"Uh-huh," I said. "I don't know why it's so important that your rival gets all of me, but he will, if he does the same in return."

The moment devolved into another staring contest. My words eventually seemed to satisfy him, but when he turned away with a swirl of his red cloak I felt my heart clench, and then it seemed to scream when he murmured: "I'll go now."

I took a step toward him on reflex; Sweet's neck blocked my way, so I clung to her. "Why?" I asked, desperate because even though I had more or less just broken up with this guy, I still cared for him like… like a brother, maybe, because he had been there for me when no one else was, had cared, had tried even if he had made a horrible job of it—and I didn't like seeing him sad, not because of me.

Not on my account.

I might love Hiei, but you never forget your first love, and Koenma… he was all I had for a long time. How could I help but care?

"You don't need me anymore," came Koenma's succinct explanation.

I breathed his name: "Koenma…"

He turned around and smiled, but sadly.

"You don't love me," he said, though not accusingly or anything—he was just stating the truth. "I only complicate things for you. You can't trust me because you know I'm keeping secrets, even if they're for your own good, and—"

He swallowed and passed a hand through his hair. I wanted to hug him. I didn't.

"I think… it would be best for me to just leave," he said.

He didn't look at me again before turning and walking away. His body slowly grew dimmer, and dimmer, getting swallowed up by the blackness surrounding the safe haven of my dreaming mind, until—

"Will I see you again?"

The words burst out of me like cannon fire, and they stopped Koenma's trek out of my dream cold. He cast a smile over his shoulder, affording me one final glance at his face—at his pointed chin and high cheekbones, those almond eyes that gleamed with fever-brightness and intention, and his lips, those thin cupid's-bow lips that…

"You will," he said, and he smiled. "I care for you too much to never see you again."

After that, he was gone.

* * *

Waking Ren up isn't easy if she's in one of her moods, and that morning, she was, because an entire week of training with Genkai has a way of tiring you out like nobody's business. I had to play the loudest pop music I could muster to get her energized (this world's Ren was a Ke$ha fan, which kind of scared me because she didn't know who Ke$ha was, which meant Ke$ha existed somewhere in this world, and do we really need more than one Ke$ha in existence at any given time?), and I had to blast more than a few dubstep smashers in the super-acoustic bathroom to actually manage to pry her eyes open, and even after _that_ she was still grumbling up a storm on our way to the breakfast room to meet the others.

I'm going to admit that not all of the music had been for her benefit. I needed some major cheering up as well, because… well, you know. Still, I tried not to let my melancholy show on my face when we encountered Kurama in the hallway, and I managed to smile in an appropriate fashion when he told us that the kitchen had been totally fixed and was back open for business.

"Those construction workers worked fast," I commented, and when he smiled a very smug little smile I had a feeling something had gone on behind the scenes he wasn't telling me about.

Tell me someone did, however, after we saw what the kitchen had morphed into. Before it had been a study of linoleum and hominess; now it was a marble-countered, stainless-steel-faucet dream kitchen that looked as sleek and modern as something you'd find in a high end restaurant. I gaped at it for more than a few seconds at first sight; Ren appeared oblivious, but then again, she usually didn't notice things the way I did. She was more into theory than reality, and she always had been.

"I convinced Genkai to redo everything from the ground up," Yukina quietly told me when she handed Ren a plate of food. "They did a splendid job in so short a time… something about wanting to hurry because the spirits were restless…"

At the head of the table, Genkai's smug smile mirrored Kurama's at the sound of Yukina's words. Doubtless those spirits had been her doing, or something like that.

We finished eating in record time. Apparently Yusuke and Kuwabara were off doing things to prepare for Koenma's arrival the next day (I couldn't help but flinch when Genkai said the prince's name, though I don't think she noticed because Ren was getting violent with her chopsticks and provided a timely distraction) and Keiko and Botan were doing the temple's collective laundry in preparation for our massive trip, which left Genkai to further train Ren (my friend went pale when she heard that) and Kurama and Hiei to take over their time with me. We all split up into the appropriate parties, me bidding Ren a rather dramatic goodbye which involved her clinging to my leg like an octopus, but Genkai dragged her off by her ear and Kurama and I started into the woods on our own.

"Where's Hiei?" I asked when we reached the same clearing we'd used to train the night before. I gripped my red-bone staff in both hands, rubbing my cheek along its silky surface to take comfort. I didn't know if I was ready to face the apparition without turning into a stuttering mess just yet, but…

Kurama picked up on what I was thinking. "Nervous?" he teased, and when I turned crimson he laughed. "Ah, yes. You are. Not to worry, though—he is busy, but he'll be along when we need him, although I'm sure you'd prefer his presence sooner."

"Oh, just shut up and train me," I said sullenly. "We've only got today, right?"

"That's right," Kurama said, and he explained how to release Sweet in the vaguest of ways: "I can't tell you exactly how to summon your Salamander, exactly, because a power like this comes from within. It's personal and your power will never, ever be exactly like another user of the same power's power. You must search within yourself for the means to summon Sweet. I will be of little help."

"Then what's the point of having a teacher at all?"

"If Hiei and the Dragon have taught me anything, it is that you might need someone to keep you from killing yourself on your first attempt."

"… touché."

"I thought you'd see it my way."

From there, Kurama launched into a very interesting account of how souls and power work in conjunction, but since I'm not smart enough to remember every little technical term that he used, I'm just going to summarize. Basically, a soul is like the positively charged end of a battery, and bodies are the negative charge. In order to actually manifest a power, you have to draw equally from the two charges, and BAM, combine them to create something. That's why using spiritual power tires out a person on a physical level and all that jazz.

"Your inborn amount of spiritual power is not something that changes," Kurama explained. "You are born with a set amount, a finite limit. What _does_ change is your ability to access the power within you. Training your body can increase how much of your spiritual power you can access, since you need the physical power in order to draw the spiritual power out into the world."

"Can I make up a handy analogy?" I asked.

"Of course."

"I can _learn_ all the guitar solos I want, but until I get the muscle in my fingers and the calluses on my pads, actually _playing_ them is pretty much impossible."

"That was clever of you, Dani," Kurama said.

I preened a little.

"Too bad you have almost no muscle or callus to speak of."

My swelled head deflated in a millisecond.

"The problem I foresee with you is two-fold," he continued. "Even as you are, you can barely access your spiritual power because of your physical weakness. This is further complicated by you having a second soul living inside your body. Before, your physical power was a mere tenth of your spiritual power. Now, with Sweet's additional spiritual energy inside of you, your physical energy is a _hundredth_ of your collective spiritual energy." He smiled a little. "If you'd like another musical analogy, giving Sweet the necessary physical energy to manifest is going to be like dissecting flawless Pérotin polyphonics with a toddler's ear."

"Don't even talk to me about Pérotin!" I said with a groan. "The harmonics in the _viderunt omnes_ just about killed me!"

"You're a Pérotin fan, then?" Kurama said.

"'Fan' might not be the word I'd use, but his works are fantastic even if they're almost impossible for me to wrap my head around," I said. "I mean, his use of—"

"Dani."

I stopped talking and looked at Kurama. His eyes were narrowed, his lips were pursed, his brows knit together so much that they looked like a unibrow…

"Pérotin lived in the thirteenth century. How do you," he asked, "know about him?"

* * *

There was no way I was going to tell Kurama about me being from another world. No way in hell. It just wasn't going to happen, and I'm sorry, but the fox is just way too sneaky for me. He'd tell everyone, or maybe he wouldn't, or maybe he would, but the fact remains that he's just way too unpredictable for me so my policy is to just not get into it with him at all, ever.

So, I did what I do(n't) do best: I lied my freaking ass off.

Suffice to say, I didn't do it very well.

"Oh, um," I said, and I was about to tell him that I had gone to a music store when we went to the mall, but wait, dammit, Kurama had been there and would know it was a lie! Crap! When had Kurama not been around, and when had I been around people who—

Of course!

When in doubt, blame the bad guy!

"Ryu had me listen to Pérotin when we had dinner that one time," I said, relieved at finding a suitable lie that Kurama probably couldn't contest. "We talked about all sorts of music. It was really interesting to figure out what you guys had in the past!"

Which was true, in a way—the thought that a historical musician had existed in my world and in this one—

_E tu, Brute? _

I promptly forgot my current dilemma, because that's when I remembered my conversation with Kuwabara.

_E tu, Brute?_

_ Sorry, Caesar. _

"What are the odds?" I said out loud, stunned into staring into nothing as I thought about the bizarreness of the whole affair. "What are the _freaking_ odds!"

"Dani?"

"Hmm?" I refocused on Kurama, remembering in a flash what was going on. I filed Caesar and Brutus into the back of my mind for further study. "What?"

"I was saying that Ryu has good taste, if nothing else," he said, but I was far from put at ease by his dismissive words because he looked suspicious—really suspicious.

Still, I was willing to take what I could get. I smiled my most chipper smile and waved my staff around, laughing a little in what I hoped was not a nervous fashion. "Back to the summoning!"

* * *

My first attempt at bringing Sweet to life was disastrous.

I mean, what was I expecting, perfect success on my first try?

…

Well, no.

But I wasn't expecting to have the skin on my arms boil, either.

What happened was an accident, of course. Kurama explained that I needed to feed Sweet my energy, and that since we were connected on a deep level, she would probably be able to manage finding her way out of my body on her own. I explained it all to her in my head and she thought it seemed like a fine plan, and I trusted her judgment on this, so… I went into theta and let her have full access to my energy stores. I just opened myself up and told her to take what she needed. Seemed like a good plan to me, right?

Sweet, as it turns out, is something of a pig.

In an instant, every last drop of my energy had been sucked into a spiraling vortex of bright red Salamander, and I was left gasping for air as I felt her surge throughout my body, trying to find clear passage outside. She ended up pooling in my arms (since I had sent her an image of Hiei summoning the Dragon through his earlier in the explanation) and trying to force her way out through there, but it was like she was straining against an unbreakable rubber wall that made her ricochet off of my insides until the pressure grew, grew, grew—

—and _burst_, outward, through my pores. My skin bubbled and twisted into slick, shiny black, and I let out a scream before falling into nothingness in a dead faint.

So, yeah.

First attempt didn't go so well.

* * *

The picture I painted about Sweet burning my arms was pretty flippant, but I want you to know that it was painful. Like, really painful. The blacking out was my natural reaction to avoiding the pain, and when I woke up in my typical dreamscape with gigantic-again Sweet hovering over me, radiating pathetic apologies and begs for forgiveness, I was more than a little happy to not be in my waking body. I could feel dull throbs of the phantom pain in my spirit's arms; I knew without knowing how that my body was having some serious problems, if I could feel them all the way from here.

"I shouldn't have let you run rampant like that, it's my fault," I said to Sweet, trying to soothe the distraught beast by stroking her massive nose. "Don't cry, please, don't—"

_ Too greedy,_ she mourned, _too greedy, hurt you, no no no—_

"Hush, honey, it's not your fault, it's mine," I told her, desperate for her to stop keening in such a heartbreaking way—

"You're right. It _is_ your fault."

I spun with a curse to find Hiei standing behind me, and he looked positively livid.

"Are you stupid?" he hissed, scarlet eyes flaming so brightly I thought they'd burn me worse than Sweet had. "Are you stupid, or do you just have a death wish?"

"Hiei, I—"

"Letting a dumb beast control everything you have, Dani? Really?"

"Sweet's not dumb!" I protested.

Hiei just sneered. "In what plane of existence is giving a beast full rein a smart thing to do?" He tossed his head, eyes flashing even bright as his lips pulled back over his sharp teeth. "I'm beginning to believe you really _are_ from another world, one in which everyone is born exceptionally _stupid_!"

"OK, I know I did something dumb, but now you're just being _mean_!" I snapped. Sweet echoed my budding anger with a growl of her own, her claws fisting on either side of me like protective sentinels. "I only tried to mimic what you do with the Dragon, and—"

"And Kurama told you from the start that mimicry was a pointless task!" Hiei roared. I flinched into Sweet's shadow when he stalked forward, but before he could get to me Sweet swiped one truck-sized paw at him. Somehow he managed to dodge past her in a flicker of black, appearing in front of me so he could grab my wrist and pull me closer to him. His spirit-self was dressed in his black cloak, one which he pushed off of his right arm with his left hand so I could see his skin—skin marred with a coil of black scales that shone with iridescent violet. The Dragon tattoo was as much a tattoo as it was a scar, or a brand, and it was as much both of those things as it was a living, breathing being enmeshed in Hiei's flesh. I could almost see the scales rise and fall as something inside of it drew breath.

Did my tattoo look like that, too? Or did Hiei's look like this only because it was in his spirit? Did mine in the real world mimic this, or was it just the one on my spirit's back?

"The Dragon comes through my arm because that's where it marked me when I first summoned it, you foolish girl!" he snarled, hand tightening on my wrist so hard that I cried out. "You've already been marked by your beast! Don't try ripping yourself apart when you already have a door to use!"

It hadn't occurred to me to think like that, but as soon as Hiei said it, I felt like an idiot.

"When Ryu tried marking me, Sweet protected me through the tattoo," I said, clearly having an epiphany of some sort. "Why… why the hell did I see—?"

"Because you're an inexperienced idiot," Hiei deadpanned. His anger seemed to have quieted, and he released my arm with a sour expression. "Now wake up. We're trying it again."

* * *

They were arguing when I came back to life. Other than the intense, burning, throbbing, sting of pain in my arms, all I could really perceive were their raised voices and the fact that I was lying on something incongruously soft. Everything else focused on the pain.

"You should have told her," Hiei was saying. "You should have said something!"

But Kurama wasn't apologetic. "You told me to tell her the minimum so she could learn on her own, Hiei," he patiently reminded the fire apparition. "I did as you asked. Had you been here, perhaps—"

"You _know_ why I couldn't have been here," Hiei growled in response. "I left early when I felt Dani hurt herself; _she_ wasn't happy. I'll get hell for this."

_She?_ I thought.

"I hardly see how that's my fault," Kurama said, miffed. "You knew the risks as well as I did, and you were fine with taking them—"

At that point I inhaled something weird and coughed to get it out of my throat, which cut their conversation short.

"She's awake," Hiei said (_duh_, I thought).

"I can see that," Kurama said dryly. Footsteps rustled over grass. "Dani, can you open your eyes?"

I did so, blinking in the bright sunlight filtering from between the leaves above me. It took me a minute to remember that we were in the woods, still, and that I had…

"My arms feel like shit," I said, words grinding in my dry mouth, and I sat up as slowly as I could. A hand on my back held me steady; Kurama made sure I didn't fall over or get dizzy, and when I looked down at my hands I saw that he had done far more than that. Strange steel-blue plants with leaves as broad as pillows had popped up in the grass around me, creating the soft cushion I was lying on, and from the elbows down the leaves had plastered themselves to my skin like a layer of protective gauze. I could smell mint when I shifted, and the touch of the leaves on my flesh was rather cool.

"Mint," Kurama said when I gave him a questioning look. "It's healing the burns. You were burned very badly, Dani."

My heart leapt into my mouth. "Are my hands OK?" I asked, dreading the answer that I'd never get to play guitar again, or—

"It's merely surface damage to your skin," Kurama said soothingly. "Burns are the most painful wound, but in your case they are superficial. You should be fine in a few hours if we keep the leaves intact."

I looked down at my arms, and Kurama reached out one pale hand to peel one of the leaves back. The slow peel hurt like nothing else, making me hiss a breath in through my teeth, and when he pulled the leaf back enough I could see clear goop stringing between it and my skin… skin which had turned the same shade of red as Sweet's body. It was as an unnatural a red as Hiei's eyes, and one that didn't look like a product of a burn at all beneath the whorls and lines of my runched-up, singed skin.

"That's not going to be permanent, is it?" I asked.

Kurama winced. "I'm not sure," he said. "The discoloration seems like less of a wound than it does a byproduct of Sweet's power. Whether or not it will fade, I am uncertain."

"Hiei?" I asked, looking at the man. "What do you think?"

He said nothing for a moment, standing over me motionlessly and with a completely unreadable expression. His eyes eventually fell closed when he breathed an odd sigh.

"I have no idea," he said. His eyes opened and fixed on me. "Just be lucky the burns aren't worse than they are."

I didn't say anything to that. I just looked down at my arms and sighed.

From there, Kurama kept me training, and this time Hiei actually stuck around to oversee it. To my immense surprise and happiness, I didn't feel nearly as awkward around him as I thought I would've, since the anger behind our first meeting inside my dream-place had been too intense to allow me to get embarrassed or fidgety, and I guess I got used to him more quickly than I thought. Still though, I caught myself staring at him more than once when I thought he wasn't looking, just trying to figure out how to act when all these weird things inside my chest kept jumping at the sound of his voice and the glint of his hair in the sun.

The good thing about the burns was that they made me feel quite warm, and the day had been cold enough to make my single sweatshirt not quite enough protection from the weather. I didn't have any jacket other than the fluffy Demon World monstrosity of a coat; the sweatshirt was it, and so the burns really did have a silver lining. I mean, accessing theta state while shivering up a storm isn't exactly conducive to gradually letting Sweet touch small tastes of my energy at a time, since the whole process took massive amounts of concentration and precision, and I needed all the concentration-aids I could get.

It took nearly all day, but by the end of it I actually sort of managed to figure out how to bring Sweet into the world. It started with letting her heat up my tattoo until it burned like red-hot iron in my skin (which didn't hurt me at all) and then that progressed to letting her actually shoot heat out of me, and then _that_ went on to letting her come out on her own. She literally slithered out of my tattoo like it was a magician's door to a room too small to contain what comes out of it, her front claws grasping the edges of the tattoo to use as leverage to pull herself free of my soul. It hurt when she did it; I had to shrink her inside of me before her massive head and long neck could fit through the tattoo's 'doorway', and even then it still felt like I was trying to fit a tank engine through a pinhole.

"Have you ever seen one of those ships inside a bottle?" I griped at one point early on. "I feel like _she's_ the ship and _I'm_ the bottle—the neck of me is way too small to let her out, and if she forces herself out she's going to break me in half!" I paused to think about something, utterly horrified when I asked: "Is this what giving birth is like? Holy crap, how the fuck do people _survive_ this? WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE THEY THINKING?"

Hiei looked more than a little freaked out when I said that, though Kurama only laughed.

In the end, I didn't have the strength to give Sweet a physical manifestation of her very own. I could manifest her head, neck, and front legs, all of that coming out of my back like I was growing her from a bud off my spine, but she couldn't get all the way out without it feeling like she was ripping my soul in half. She could interact with the physical world from her spot between my shoulder blades, swinging her claws and head around to bite and swipe at the trees (and Hiei when he got too close; she was still sore towards him) but even when I shrunk her to the size of a greyhound and her neck was only a few feet long, she still couldn't come all the way out.

"Peculiar," Kurama kept murmuring. "Very, very peculiar."

"It hurts to let her go free," I said to him. "It's like she's taking too much of me with her."

"That's because you're friends with it," Hiei said derisively. "I have no attachment to the Dragon. I can let it go and hold nothing back."

"I suppose that's also why the Dragon literally tears himself out of you when you use him," I said coolly. "At least when _I_ summon _Sweet_, she doesn't make me bleed on purpose."

We stared at one another silently for a few seconds after that, neither wanting to start a fight but both knowing that this wasn't something we'd probably ever come to agree upon. Kurama sensed the tension, however, and made to break it up before things could get ugly.

"The sun is setting," he said, indicating the sky with a wave of his hand. "We need to return to the temple."

I wiggled my arms in their leafy cocoons; they had stopped stinging, but Kurama had insisted I stay wrapped up for as long as possible. "Open sesame?"

Kurama smiled as he waved his hand again. Before my eyes the leaves retracted, letting go of my arms with greasy, goopy pops, and then they shrank to buds, and then to seeds that Kurama began to gather.

My arms were left covered in the clear gooey gunk, which I began wiping gingerly on the grass around me. I studied my hands once they were mostly clean, holding my breath when I curled my fingers for the first time in hours. They felt fine, I mean, I could flex them without trouble and there was no pain other than some general soreness, but…

"I'm tan," I said in muted wonder. From my elbows down my skin was at least two shades darker than my typical ghostly white, and this made my eyebrows shoot into the stratosphere. "Ugh, I have a _farmer's tan_! And, and hey, what the _hell_?"

My nails, oddly enough, had turned the same color as my earlier reddened skin. Crimson to the quick, they were the same color as Sweet's skin and were as shiny as if they had been freshly painted. I rubbed at them with my thumbs, trying to clear the color away, but it wouldn't budge and I was left with perfectly painted nails.

"It could wear off," Kurama offered after examining me, "or it could stay. We'll just have to wait and see."

"Great," I said, and I looked to the silent fire apparition. However, Hiei had no opinion on the matter, merely smirking before turning away when I plaintively held out my hands to him. I responded by sticking out my tongue, and he just rolled his eyes before heading off for the temple. Kurama and I followed not long after.

* * *

NOTES:

_I AM HEAVILY MEDICATED, BA HA HA._

_Those of you who haven't, FIND MY BLOG._

_There's a link on my profile. Bookmark it. Check it when I go missing. Those of you who DO keep up with my deviantART/blog know that I went absent (again, ugh) because I was having emergency/urgent/OMG WTF IS THIS surgery. So, yeah. Hence the lack of updates. I posted stuff on my blog and art page that talked about the whole shebang, so people who are connected to me in those fashions are in-the-know. _

_Blog also includes silly videos of me waking up from anesthesia and saying dumb things. IT'S WEIRD._

_More on the following soon: Caesar, Dani's past, Yusuke/Keiko, telling/not telling Ren, telling/not telling Hiei, AND MORE. Loose ends are being tied up en masse. STAY TUNED. _

_And now it's time for the FESTIVAL! Which, unfortunately, will bring about the events that lead to the end of FT as we know it. Sadness! But it's also high time for this thing to come to a close. I had no idea just how longwinded it would get when I started. _

_It was brought to my attention by the horribly-neglected Madame Blaze (who predicted Sweet's body-getting and illustrated the scene, like, months ago) that I had not put links to all of the artwork drawn about my fics on my profile! I know, I know—I'm horrible. However, I did take the time to correct the problem, so I hope I managed to redeem myself a smidge. If you think I'm missing links to YOUR work(s), please let me know so I can further fix my grievous wrongdoings. I feel terrible. (*cries*)_

_Sorry this is short. I just don't have a concrete schedule (summer has thrown everything into disarray) and I'm having trouble finding time to write, which seems counterintuitive for summer, but whatever, it is what it is. I'm thinking about changing the update day to NOT the middle of the week, because I'm starting work soon and it's probably not a good idea to have a Wednesday update schedule. What do y'all think?_

_Love everyone! Colbub, heve-chan, Zetsubel, TeacupKitty, etowa-ru, yonet-chan, Reiko Tsuchikake, Esprgirl, Caralirani, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Bitches Be Crazy, hieisdarkdragonchick, Kaiya's Watergarden, Yoko Kiara14, Eggbert 3000, Btch, phantomxofxmystery, spiritfoxxx821, flamingmarsh, Takara Rose Oizumi. Kai-chan94, Koryu Elric, anon, KayTeeCee, OhhTaylorJade, XAudra RoseX, Captain Lupin Ferus, TallyYoungblood, destinyswindow, Mi-chan1991, DaAmazingMeepers, j.d.y., Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, AkaMizu-chan, rain chant, Madame Blaze, xxx,Foxgirl Ray, chocolateluvr13!_


	72. Chapter 72: Simple Design

Future Talk

Chapter 72:

"Simple Design"

* * *

Wind blew hard enough to rip the scrunchie out of my left pigtail. I yelped and grabbed at it; Hiei blurred in front of me and appeared again at my side with the black elastic in hand, holding it out with a look that said he was about to give me one of his half-affectionate, half-exasperated insults.

"Thanks," I said as I began gathering up my wayward hair.

He bit the insult back.

Kurama had only just put his foot on the porch steps when that happened. He turned to look at us, smiling just a little, before climbing the stairs and sliding open the temple's door.

Yukina stood just behind it. When she saw us, her face lit up with a bright smile.

"I thought I felt you coming!" she said. "Dinner is almost ready in the kitchen. Are you hungry?"

"I'm absolutely starved!" I blurted out.

"Wonderful," she said. "I prepared all the food in the temple tonight. We wouldn't want it to go bad while we're away!"

At that, I felt my palms go sort of sweaty. To cover it I began retying my pigtail, allowing the others to get ahead of me when they followed Yukina inside the house. Kurama asked her something about how everyone's day had been; I was too preoccupied to catch the exact wording.

"Ren and Genkai aren't back quite yet," she said. "They should be along soon, though."

I went after them as quickly as I could, half-hopping up the steps as the others disappeared into the temple itself. I saw that they had taken the hallway leading toward the kitchen once I got inside; I, however, felt a little antisocial after having such a people-intensive day, and so I turned down the hall leading to my room.

"Where are you going?"

I looked over my shoulder. Hiei had stopped walking, as had Yukina and Kurama, and they were all looking at me.

"Oh, I need a bath, I think," I said, waving him and the others off. "See you in a few!"

Although they looked a little reluctant to let me go off on my own, I ignored them and made my way to the bathroom. Yukina's remark about us leaving the temple had made my stomach churn, definitely not in a good way, and more than anything I just really wanted to be alone for a few minutes. I grabbed a change of clothes from my room (I was sweaty despite it being cold outside) and showered, after that sinking into the bath with a contented sigh. Tension in my shoulders melted away as I lounged in the hot water. I didn't think about much. I'd been thinking all day, after all…

"Uh… Dan?"

I sat bolt upright in the bath at the sound of my name, but then I remembered that I was naked and sank further into the water with a curse—one that happened to slip out in English.

"It _is_ you!" the voice said after a second. "Great! I've been looking all over for you!"

I knew that voice—I knew I did. But, who the hell had enough balls to talk to a girl when she was in the—

"Yusuke?" I hissed. "Yusuke, is that you?"

"Uh, yeah," he said. "Who'd you think it was?"

I gaped at the flimsy white curtain separating the bathroom from the towel room outside. It was pulled shut, thank the lord, but Yusuke's voice was definitely the one addressing me from the other side of it.

"This is the girl's bathroom!" I snapped, feeling my cheeks heat up. "You can't be here!"

"Uh, yes I can," he said. "You see, _you're_ in the girl's bathroom, _I'm_ in the co-ed entry room. Hall. Thing."

A moment of silence followed that revelation. Then Yusuke coughed awkwardly.

"Point is," he said, "Keiko can't hit me for being out here. Neither can you. Neat, huh?"

"Neat is not the word I would have used," I grumbled. I ran my fingers through my hair, hit a mass of snarls, and began to pick them out with my nails. "What do you want, anyway?"

I heard him rustle around a bit and grunt; presumably, he had found a spot to sit.

"Well, I was wondering if you could talk to me about Keiko a little bit." I could hear the blush in his voice. "I mean, you know… you said you'd help me, and stuff?"

"What did you want to talk about?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing much."

"… Yusuke, I'm naked."

If there were any doubts as to the awkwardness of the conversation, that comment banished them completely. Yusuke seemed to think so, too.

"Uh… so?" he said, voice cracking on the last syllable. "What's that got to do with anything?"

I gave the curtain (which I treated as Yusuke's surrogate presence) a dead-fish stare. "You would not have risked Keiko's wrath to talk to me in the bath without good reason," I said.

"…you have a point."

"I know."

He didn't say anything for a second. Then, he sighed.

"All right, you got me," he said. "I just… well, I tried talking to her earlier, and I… well…"

"Well, what?"

He mumbled something. I couldn't make it out, and I said so.

"I said," Yusuke said with a touch of irritation, "that I tried talking to her, and she… she told me it wasn't like I'd listen to her anyway, and just what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Even without proper context, I made a logical leap and assumed I knew what Yusuke was talking about with a 99% certainty level. It wasn't difficult—I'd seen enough Keiko-Yusuke-interaction on Yu Yu Hakusho to know that Yusuke was the type to let Keiko ramble on and on, appearing to be listening to what she had to say when, in reality, he was zoning out thinking about a boxing match he'd seen on TV the night before. His lack of interest in Keiko's life would blow up in his face when Keiko asked him a direct question and he failed to come up with a suitable answer, as I surmised it did on a regular basis.

"Well, man," I said, "what do _you_ think she's talking about?"

It was a calculated question. I wanted him to be aware of his own shortcomings. At least if he knew about them, we'd be on the fast track to fixing them, right?

However, Yusuke is nothing if not oblivious.

"I dunno," he said with a dejected sigh. "I mean, I always listen to her! It's impossible not to! She never shuts up!"

My mouth twitched; Yusuke was, apparently, hopeless as well as blind.

"You are such a typical guy," I said dryly. "Seriously. You couldn't get more stereotypical if you actually tried."

Predictably, Yusuke was a little incensed by that. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he said. He sounded more than a little annoyed, voice grinding out the syllables as if they pained him.

"It means," I told him, "that there's a difference between hearing Keiko, and actually listening to her."

That made him pause. The seconds ticked by, the splish-splash of water licking at my skin providing the only auditory backdrop.

"I'm… not sure I follow," he finally said.

I breathed a deep sigh. "How do I explain this?" I mumbled. I leaned back and dipped my hair in the water as I thought about my plan of attack, letting the hot liquid tingle against my scalp until I figured out how I wanted my line of inquiry to work. Then, I asked: "Can I ask you a question?" My voice sounded muffled since my ears were underwater.

Yusuke seemed a little off put by that. I raised my head, water streaming everywhere, just in time to hear him say: "Uh… sure?"

I took a deep breath. "Would you say that Keiko's the type to tell you everything about herself?" I asked. "Like, everything, everything? She gets home from school and unloads everything that happened to her, what she's feeling about it, what her friends said down to the exact wording, office gossip… all that?"

"…I guess."

"And is she the type to talk to you for hours about her favorite TV shows, her outfits, her favorite actor getting married to a trampy model… all that junk?"

"Well, yeah, actually," Yusuke said, tone tinged with surprise mixed with realization and a little awe (probably at me guessing how Keiko liked to talk, though that's up for grabs). "She could go on for hours about what celebrities wear at award ceremonies, and I mean who has time for—?"

I cut the boy off. "And would I be right by saying that you're about as interested in celebrity gossip as you are in wearing skirts in public?"

My half-joking question got him to chuckle. "That's a pretty good comparison," he said.

I settled back against the tub's slick side, licking my lips as I thought about everything I'd just learned, but had already suspected.

"The good news," I eventually said, "is that I think I know what's wrong with this picture."

He grumbled: "Keiko's big mouth?"

"Well, maybe a little," I relented, "but we're not here to talk about her shortcomings. We're here to talk about yours."

"Wait, what?" Yusuke said (although what was surprising about that beat the heck out of me). "I sit there and listen to her even when it's really boring, and I mean I only complain a little—!"

"Again, Yusuke," I interceded, "there's a difference between hearing her, and listening to her."

"And I still don't get it!"

Beginning to understand why Genkai consistently referred to him as 'dimwit', I bit back my frustration to calmly ask: "Who is Keiko's favorite actor?"

He responded as I thought he would—with uncertainty. "Uh… well, that's kind of a tricky question…"

"Exactly," I said. "You have no clue, and guess what? She probably talks about him all the time, but do you actually listen to her? No. You just let her talk at you and you hope that it's enough to appease her, but it's not enough." I shook my head and swallowed, uneasy. "Not nearly."

He sounded dubious with his reply. "So… you want me to pay attention to celebrity gossip?" he said in a low, tense voice.

"Not necessarily," I assured him, and he breathed a sigh of intense relief. "What I'm getting at is that when a girl tells you way too much information about her day at school, it's because she wants you to be a part of her life. To her, information is the same thing as connection, even though men think differently." Even though he couldn't see me, I leveled a finger at the doorway and pointed at Yusuke through the curtain, driving home my point with that unseen gesture. "Men and women _do_ think differently. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise."

"OK...?"

"OK," I said. "So, when Keiko starts monologueing about who's who in the movie industry, try to remember that it's because she loves you."

"Uh… it is?" He did not seem convinced.

"It is." I kept my tone resolute, hoping to inspire confidence in him. "She's not trying to bore you—she's just trying to keep you up to date on how her world is growing and changing. The best thing for you to do would be to pay attention, and to try to be able to keep up with her passions and likes and dislikes and stuff like that." I gesticulated with my hands, waving one in the air as if wafting a breeze toward my face. "You know, actually be able to have a dialogue with her, instead of just letting her monologue all the time?"

"So I need to start paying attention to the tabloids," Yusuke deadpanned. "Great. That's just great, Dani."

"Hey, that's not what I'm saying!"

"Then get to the point!"

"I'm trying, OK?"

"Well, try harder!"

"Jerk," I said. My temples were beginning to throb just a little bit, but I ignored it and kept on trucking. "You need to be able to have a dialogue with Keiko. Listen to what she's actually saying, make notes on the things that do interest you, and then steer the conversation to an area you can both enjoy."

"…that's kind of sneaky."

"Maybe, but if you're able to show that you remember the things she says, she'll know you're doing more than just letting her talk," I told him. "The only other advice I can give you is to get interested in her interests. Maybe not all of them—I mean, I know how painful shopping can be to guys, but if she's really into a certain TV show, maybe try to force yourself to watch a few episodes so you have a common interest. It'll make listening to her a lot easier, if you actually know what she's talking about."

Yusuke processed that for a moment.

"So, know what she likes and watch her TV," he thoughtfully said." I think I can mange that."

I shot the doorway a dark look, stood up, and wrapped a towel around my torso. "Hey, it's a little more complicated than just watching her favorite—"

"Detective."

I froze as my body automatically started mimicking a mouse, the hot water lapping at my legs suddenly seeming a lot less warming that it had previously. Something scrambled over tile; presumably, Yusuke had stood up.

_That voice… did not sound happy._

"Oh, um, hi Hiei!" Yusuke said with only the slightest of nervous tremors. "How long have you been—"

Hiei spared no time for chatter. "What are you doing?" he snapped with obvious annoyance.

"Oh, just talking to Dani," Yusuke said above the sound of his jumpy laugh. "We were—"

"You were what?" Hiei hissed. "Do tell me, detective. What _were_ you doing?"

Obviously, Yusuke did not like Hiei's disparaging tone. "Don't get your panties in a knot—I was just talking to Dani! Sheesh!" he said. "Don't give me the third degree!"

Hiei's response came as though he were trying to explain something obvious to an idiot. "She's in the bath," he said. "The _bath_, Yusuke."

"Yeah?" Yusuke said. "So?"

Hiei doesn't blush. Still though, if there were ever a moment where he probably would, it was when he said in a very small and awkward sort of voice: "So she's _naked_."

"Yeah, we talked about that," Yusuke explained.

"You WHAT?"

_Bad move, bro,_ I thought, wincing. _Bad, bad move._

Yusuke didn't do himself any favors no matter how hard I tried to telepathically communicate with him; he just dug his hole deeper. "Uh, yeah, but there's a curtain there, so it's not like I can see—"

But Hiei was having none of that. "Get out," the demon hissed. "Get, OUT!"

"Ouch, hey, that hurt!" Yusuke yelped, feet slapping away at the tile as he ran (had Hiei lit him on fire or something?)…and then silence descended like darkness over the bathroom.

I stood there, not quite knowing what to do—I mean, we'd only been talking, so Hiei was overreacting, and when was he going to yell at me, I knew he was…

But…he didn't say a word.

"So, um… hi," I said when the silence became too much to bear. I quickly got out of the tub and began pulling on my clothes. "What brings you here?"

A long pause followed my words; I entertained the thought that Hiei had left, but then: "You're giving him… relationship advice?"

I froze with my shirt pulled halfway over my head. "Um… yes?" I said into the fabric tent.

"Why?"

I swallowed. "Because… he asked for it?"

"What do _you_ know about relationships?"

My jaw dropped before anger made it slash closed. "Did you intend for that to sound really mean, or did it just come out that way?" I snapped as I pulled on my pants.

Yet another long pause, followed by a cowed: "It… just came out that way."

"Oh. Good. I'm glad I checked, then," came my cool response. "And for the record, I've had plenty of time to observe how relationships work, not to mention enough psychology courses to—"

He cut me off like a blade. "In other words, you don't know what you're doing, so you're using Yusuke and his woman as test subjects," he said.

I glared at the doorway before grabbing my things and shoving them into their bag.

"First off," I said primly, "Keiko is her own person—she's not anybody's 'woman', and second, I do too know what I'm doing! I read _Men Are From Mars_!"

"… what?"

_Oh crap, America references. _"Never mind," I said. I walked over to the curtain and raised my hand to brush it aside… but then I stopped.

"Look," I said to the curtain, "I feel responsible for breaking Yusuke and Keiko up, so I feel like I should do what I can to get them back together. Yusuke asked me to. How could I say no?" I shrugged. "And besides, it's not like he has to listen to me."

I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't seeing Hiei wrench the curtain aside. I flinched back from him, startled, but he took a step toward me and I felt myself start to stutter.

"Hey, this is the girl's room!" I snapped. I held my toiletries out between us to ward Hiei off. "You can't be in here!"

He looked like he was about to say something… but then, he didn't. His lips pressed into a thin line before he pivoted on his heel and breezed past the curtain, leaving me alone with nothing but my own confusion—because what the hell had that been about?—and the cooling bathwater for company.

* * *

The first thing I noticed about the kitchen was that my piano had been moved into it. It sat atop a spread of newspapers and its body gleamed slick with oil; the little thing looked much healthier, but who had done that while I was away?

"Oh, I thought I'd give it a new coat of polish," Yukina said when I asked her about it. "Genkai-san said it was fine, but you're the only one who plays it, and—you don't mind, do you?" Her velvety eyes looked about ready to tear me apart from guilt if I said no.

"Of course not," I assured her as she continued to set the table for dinner. "It looks gorgeous, and it needed some love, anyway." I eyed it for a second. "Mind if I play a little?"

Yukina didn't mind. I dragged over a chair from the table and (after ascertaining that the piano was still in key) began to tap out Pachelbel's Canon in D Major, taking comfort in the warmth of the classical piece even as I got lost in its loving tone. It had been one of the first full pieces I'd ever learned, after all, and it afforded me a special sort of solace…

I was startled out my playing when I heard someone clap as the final chords faded away into the air. I spun in my chair and saw Kurama and Hiei standing in the doorway. The former had given me the small burst of applause; the latter had just stared at me with his eyes narrowed, which irked me just a little because wasn't he the one I was dating?

I didn't have a chance to scowl because Yukina quickly tried to cheer me on. "That was very pretty, Dani-san!" she said. "You know some lovely songs."

"Uh, thanks," I said, feeling awkward as I dragged my chair back to the table. "That was one of my favorites."

"I can see why," she said. When I sat down she passed a plate of food over my shoulder. "Here, eat, you look—what happened to your arms?"

She had noticed my new tanlines, apparently, and was staring at them in confusion. I carefully brushed my hair behind my ears, feeling awkward and not quite knowing what to say.

"And your nails, too," she remarked. "Who painted them for you?"

Kurama jumped to my rescue, thank the lord. "They are actually a side-effect of Dani's training with her Salamander," he said, giving the ice apparition a gentle smile. "Don't worry, though—they won't be permanent, in all likelihood."

Yukina accepted that with good grace, dropping the subject in favor of ushering Kurama and Hiei (who sat next to me but didn't say a word or even hardly look at me, naturally) into chairs so she could feed them. Kuwabara and Keiko trickled into the room about a minute later, and Yusuke and Botan came after them. Yusuke made an obvious effort to sit next to Keiko (although she chatted with Botan with such force that his efforts were more or less in vain), and I was so busy watching him try to engage her in conversation that I almost forgot to ask about the two empty chairs at that night's dinner table.

"So, Ren and Genkai aren't back yet?" I asked during a lull in an argument between Kuwabara and Yusuke over what would be harder to survive, a zombie apocalypse or an alien invasion.

"Now that you mention it, they are quite late," Botan said as she put a hand to her chin. "I suppose Ren's training regime must be a tough one, for them to be taking this long on the night before we leave."

No one quite knew anything else other than that the training was difficult, so despite my unease at not knowing where Ren was, the subject was quickly dropped. I lost my appetite soon after; I've always been one to eat like a bird, and when I feel worried I eat even less.

This worried Yukina, of course. I think she interpreted my disinterest in the food as a slight on her cooking, but when she asked me with those huge crimson eyes to please just try the sashimi… well, I couldn't not eat a few more bites.

"You know, we all know you look like a kid, but it turns out you also eat like one," Yusuke teased. "You're picky-picky!"

I threw my chopsticks at him in response.

Ren and Genkai had not returned by the time we ate dessert and were sitting in full, contented silence around the kitchen table. I felt antsy doing nothing with Ren MIA, so I got up without being asked and started playing the piano again just to give myself something to do—Pachelbel's Canon in D, well, it was a hit with Keiko and Botan, who liked it even more when I mentioned that it was played in weddings quite often. Yusuke, however, thought it was boring, so I pulled out Hiromi Uehara's jazz arrangement of the song and he changed his tune just a little (so to speak).

At any rate, Botan and Keiko drifted off to bathe before going to bed, and Yusuke—seeing as how his object of affection had left the room—had no real reason to stay behind, either, so he went off to his room to mope. Kuwabara forced himself into Yukina's dish-washing routine, and I took up drying duty. Kurama left to pack, and Hiei… well, he left without a word, but that was his style so I didn't question it.

Eventually we cleaned the kitchen to Yukina's exacting standards (she was rather OCD below her typical sweetness) and were told that we should probably go to bed. I hadn't even started packing yet, so that's what I did when I got back to my room. All my possessions hardly filled up half of the duffel bag I'd been provided; you can imagine that the packing process took me all of five minutes, which left me alone in my room with nothing to do and a missing BFF to worry over.

I began writing lyrics in my notebook to pass the time. I started with the country song Kuwabara liked so much ("Shake It For Me") and moved on to some of my favorites, slowly meandering through my He Is We repertoire before moving on to selections of Sara Bareilles, some Say Anything, Gavin Mikhail, and a bunch of random others, mostly ones I could play on a solo piano, ukulele, or guitar. I'd gotten a lot better at Japanese during the past few months; some of the songs came to me easily (though all of my translations were rough drafts at that point), while others felt like I was pulling musical teeth.

Ren came home as I was agonizing over a verse of Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide". I was singing the Japanese words over and over and over again, trying to taste the sound of them in relative vain, when the door opened and I saw one of the weirdest sights I'd ever seen: Ren was on all fours, Genkai sitting cross-legged on her back, and on Ren's wrists and ankles were huge cuffs that were obviously weight belts. Sweat poured from her skin, making her blonde hair turn light brown as it slicked down her reddened face, and as I watched Genkai hopped off of my friend and kicked her in the butt so hard that Ren catapulted forward onto her empty futon face first.

"Ren!" I gasped, throwing my ukulele aside so I could scramble over to her and flip her onto her back (which was harder than it sounds because Ren is roughly twice my size, and I only completed the task because Ren herself helped).

She tried to say something, but she choked and the words came out in an inaudible whisper.

"She'll be sore in the morning," Genkai said. "Other than that, she'll be fine. She's a strong one."

"Ren, baby, oh my gosh, Ren," I babbled—but then her hand came up, twined into the fabric of my shirt, and yanked me down to her level. Blue eyes flared open, bright as a gas flame and burning hotter still.

"That woman," she growled with plenty of teeth on display, "that woman is the _devil_!"

Genkai laughed from where she stood in the doorway. I looked at her, shocked that she appeared to have understood Ren's English words, but she was just smiling.

"She's made good progress; real quick learner, that one," said the old psychic. "Not nearly as good as she was with the Beast's help, and somehow I doubt she ever will be, but still—quick learner."

"Ren's a genius," I said, more to comfort myself than anything—but then I realized that Genkai had paid Ren an actual compliment; two of them, in fact! My worry immediately became replaced by fierce pride, pride that only intensified when Ren struggled to get to her knees and raise one weighed-down hand so she could point a finger straight at an amused Genkai.

The pride doubled when Ren began speaking in Japanese. Broken Japanese, of course—but it was still Japanese.

"I beat you sometime, oba-san!" Ren snarled. "Can't keep me down, ugly lady! Fuck you, bitch!"

She promptly collapsed forward, falling into what appeared to be a deep sleep.

My jaw dropped at the cursing. I shot Genkai an accusatory glare.

"Picked that up from me, I'm afraid," Genkai said. She turned to go, but not before tossing Ren's red spiral notebook of theories to the floor in front of her. "See that she eats when she wakes up."

* * *

Ren didn't wake until a while later. I had tried to take the weights off of her arms and legs while she was asleep, but I couldn't manage it because, lo and behold, the weights were so freaking heavy that I couldn't even lift Ren's arm with one of them attached, nor could I undo their deceptively simple-looking metal clasps. Their intense weight belied their small size; I figured they were special somehow, maybe like the spirit seal thing Genkai had put on Yusuke during the Dark Tournament? Is that why I couldn't get them off?

Whatever the case, Ren didn't seem too bothered by them when she sat up and put a hand to her head with a groan. Sure, her movements were slow and labored, but she could at least lift her arms, right?

"Hey, honey," I said. I set aside my ukulele and lyric book again so I could go to her; when she saw me she grinned, obviously happy to see me.

"Hello, darlin'," she said. She started to hug me, realized she was sweaty when she smelled herself, and stood up on legs that wobbled but managed to support her weight regardless. "Ugh, I gotta get a bath."

"Genkai said you needed to eat when you woke up," I protested, but Ren waved me off and grabbed one of the few changes of clothes people had donated to her.

"Too sweaty," she said. Her eyes then gleamed with mischief. "And 'sides, maybe if I get these cuffs slippery, I can get 'em off!" she said, flexing her fingers.

"I don't know how you're moving in those," I said, eyeing them as she grabbed shampoo and other necessities with relative ease. "I tried to lift your arm and nearly threw out my back."

Blue eyes rolled. "Well, no wonder. These're five dimensional."

I made use of my catchphrase: "Wait, what?"

"You heard me," she said. "I can't do it myself yet, but Genkai is pretty good at my theories once she gets a-hang of 'em, so I taught her how to make somethin' ultra-dense by crossin' lines of reality in on themselves to make a space that—"

"You're over my head and you only just started talking!" I cut her off, laughing all the while. "So just tell me, they're really heavy, is that it?"

"No, they're really _dense_," she corrected, but then she saw my raised eyebrow and sighed. "And dense things tend t' be heavy things. You're right."

_So they are heavier than they should be… hmm…_ "And you're moving in them, how?"

This time, she actually started to grin. "Genkai's only been able to teach me two things," she said happily, "but they're sure neat things, and one of 'em is how to manipulate gravity! It's tirin', but I'm actually havin' t' make the cuffs lighter as I stand here." She looked thoughtful for a moment. "When I was asleep I wasn't doing it; that's why they were so heavy."

"Ren, that's amazing!" I said. "Can you fly? Can you—"

She started shaking her head before I even finished a second option. I bit back my guesses with a sheepish look.

"All I can do is lessen gravity, Dan," she said. "I can't do zero-gravity, not yet, and given how hard it is to just lessen it… I don't know if I ever will."

Ren looked inordinately sad when she said that; I was reminded of the sadness I had felt at not being able to fully summon Sweet, and at the thought of the Salamander, I realized something good. Before, I had been wary of telling Ren about Sweet because I had no way of proving Sweet's existence to her. Now, however, I could manifest Sweet in the real world, which meant I had real proof that she was inside of me—

—but Ren, right then… she didn't look like she wanted me to start showing off. She looked more frustrated than anything.

"What's your second power?" I asked, trying to cheer her up by giving her a chance to show off. "I bet it's really cool!"

Rather than perk up, however, her face fell into an even more melancholy set.

"It's cool, real cool," she agreed without a smile. She looked away, picking at the bands on her wrists with her fingertips. "I'll show it to ya later, though. Right now, I really need to take a bath."

She left, looking thoughtfully despondent, and I watched her go feeling uneasy. To cover my thoughts, however, I followed her a few minutes later and called through the bathroom curtain: "Hey Ren?"

"That you, Dan?" she asked.

"Yeah. Will you meet me in the kitchen after your bath?"

"Sure," she said. Though the water splashing and the hiss other showers made her hard to hear, it did nothing to mask the melancholy remaining in her tone. "See ya in a bit."

I went to the kitchen to wait with unease making my steps drag. I brought along my notebook so I could test out my new Japanese lyrics at the piano. I found a Tupperware container of food labeled with katakana characters for Ren's name in the fridge, and once I put it out on the table so she could get at it right away, I started playing through and correcting the songs I'd managed to write down. The kitchen was dark, but comforting, especially since it was filled with music. I passed the time before Ren's reappearance in a happy blur of singing and playing. It felt so good to have keys under my fingers…

I heard the door open behind me after a while, but I was in the middle of 'Landslide' (which I had finally worked out) so I did not turn around when steps crossed the kitchen. Ren had no sense of rhythm; it was hard to keep the song in-tempo when she seemed intent on defying—

I flinched and shrieked when an unexpected hand circled the back of my neck and squeezed. Hard. Cold skin tingled against mine and I gasped, jerking my hands away from the piano as fingers crushed my nape hard enough to bruise, and when I tried to twist out of the grip another hand shot forward and fisted itself in my hair, forcing me to bow my head like I was praying. I reached back with a cry of Ren's name and grabbed the wrist of the hand in my hair, trying to shove her off of me, but the hand on my neck grew even tighter—

"Hush, Dan," Ren hissed, and the next thing I knew a low thrum (well, not a physical thrum, but an almost-tangible sensation of pulling and calling and beckoning) echoed out of the bones of her hand and deep into the material of my spine; the call tasted of pale green, the color I knew that meant Ren was using whatever her second, unnamed power was, because she was doing something inside of me and even though Sweet started freaking out and trying to force Ren out of me, nothing she or I did could stop her.

It was as Koenma had said: Ren was my antithesis, anathema, cancellation, and there was nothing I could do against her.

I went utterly still and stiff as each of my individual vertebrae began not-vibrating, starting with the ones under Ren's fingers and moving down one, by one, by one, until the echo called into the base of my spine… _and something actually answered it_. A shiver made me arch backward with a cry, and a coldness seemed to rip itself out of my bones and rocket up the curve of my spine; whatever-it-was connected with Ren's palm with an audible smack, and I could feel the thing stretching against the skin on my nape as though it were trying to free itself out of my body like a living, breathing animal trapped too long in a frail plastic bag.

Ren let me go when the thing under my skin very nearly sliced me open, and her power left me with the cleansing wash of a receiving tide. My fists loosened around Ren's wrist and crashed down onto the keyboard with a horrible discord, leaving me hunched over the keys to gasp as my nape throbbed with dimming pain.

"I knew it," I heard Ren say over the sound of my own labored breath. Her voice came low, husky, and engaged, like she was studying a particularly incomprehensible puzzle she couldn't get enough of. "I knew it was there—but why was it hidden like that?"

"What are you talking about?" I coughed. I looked at her over my shoulder through one eye, heedlessly letting my hair fall to obscure my face; Ren was beaming in triumph.

"I'm talking about your command point," she said, and with a grin she turned around and lifted her hair from the back of her neck to reveal the silver metal dot staining her tanned skin. "You know… this thing, the one you didn't have—"

I think I stopped breathing, then—

"—until now."

—because this… this had not been something I'd seen coming.

Not by a long shot.

* * *

I couldn't form words no matter how hard I tried, so I went by feel instead, lifting my hand as though I was pulling it through cold molasses to shakily feel the metal disc sticking out of my skin. Its edge was smooth and the same temperature as my skin, but—

"My other power is magnetism," Ren was saying, though I hardly heard her. "I figured I could really check ya out with it but I knew you'd not like it n'—"

"What is going on here?"

I managed to look weakly at the door, hand still plastered to the back of my neck, to see Hiei standing in it. He looked pissed… not that that was a new thing, but whatever.

"Uh," Ren said, and then in broken Japanese: "Talking, Dani, me… hello!"

Hiei didn't return the greeting; he just glared at Ren like he wanted to run her through with his sword, which he probably did. Ren shrank back, uncertain what she'd done wrong.

I soon figured it out. "I felt your fear," Hiei said, eyes sliding my way slowly. "What did she do to you?"

I didn't say anything. I just stared at him, heart beginning to beat a little slower. I hadn't realized that it had been racing until it started to come down from its adrenaline-laced high.

"Dani?" he said, taking a step further into the kitchen. The door swung shut behind him with a crack. "Do I need to hurt her?"

I shook my head. When it became apparent that I wasn't about to say anything else. Hiei shot Ren a sharp glance.

"Get out," he said, and when she just looked at him, he pointed at the door and snarled: "Leave, now!"

Ren got the message—she might be dense with body language and social cues, but Hiei isn't someone anyone can mistake as cuddly when he gets mad, and mad he was indeed. She yelped as if physically stung, looked guiltily at me, and left the room as if being chased by rabid dogs. Silence descended in her wake, footsteps quickly disappearing down the hall.

When neither I nor Hiei said anything, I let my hand drift from my neck and turned to stare at the keys of the piano. He came up behind me like I knew he would; I only knew he reached out to touch the metal plate on my neck because the pressure of his finger made me bend forward just a little. I had no feeling in the metal that, apparently, was inseparably entwined with the body I had thought was…

"This only makes your story less likely, you know," Hiei said slowly.

That caught me off-guard. "What story?" I asked.

Hiei didn't answer right away. He moved to drag another chair to the piano, setting it next to me so he could likewise stare down at the tan keys I couldn't tear my eyes from.

"You being from another world," he said. "You're marked, like Ren is. It proves that you were in a chrysalis."

I watched, dazed, as Hiei lifted a hand and—as gently as if he were caressing the skull of a newborn—pressed down on one of the piano keys. He pressed it too softly for it to make a sound.

"You're not going to convince me of anything at this rate," he said. His hand pulled back to rest on his knee. "What are you thinking?"

I wasn't thinking much at that point, but luckily for me Hiei seemed to be in a patient mood. I struggled in silence, turning over my thoughts like pebbles in a streambed, until I came up with something.

"My mom's body was a shapeshifter," I said, choking out the words as if each one were a war in and of itself. "It took the shape I had before the pods, when I didn't have the… metal thing. So, it didn't show up when my body took my form, and just stayed inside me somewhere, until Ren—"

"Or when your age reversed in the pods, it went into you," Hiei cut in.

"I have a plan, you know," I blurted. "Kuwabara, he said something that night we played quarters, and Kurama, he said something else about a composer that got me to thinking—"

"What are you talking—"

"I think I'm going to be able to prove my being from another world when we go shopping," I said, and then the absurdity of the statement struck me. I put hand to my lips to suppress a hysterical giggle. "Oh wow—the fate of my world hangs on a trip to the mall. I thought I had left my teenage tendencies behind me!"

Hiei didn't see the humor. "What do you mean, you have a plan?" he demanded. "What is this plan of yours?"

I licked my lips, wondering how much to reveal.

"I got to thinking about this yesterday," I said, "but I need to know one thing, first."

Hiei's eye flickered to me, though he didn't turn his head my way.

"Have you ever read Ren's mind?" I asked.

Annoyance flashed across his face. My brow furrowed; what was that about?

"No," he said, voice grinding a bit.

He did not go on. I waited, but…

"… why do I feel like there's more to this that you're not telling me?" I asked at last.

This time, he looked fully away, glancing above the piano with a scowl that could set stone aflame.

"They wanted me to read everything in her mine, like I did with you," he said slowly, "but… I couldn't." He looked my way, then, with flashing eyes that dared me to question him. "She doesn't think like normal humans, or even demons. She thinks in numbers, in spirals, in…" He stopped and grappled with words he didn't know how to control, until finally he said: "I can hear her surface thoughts and her emotions, but nothing else. It's all buried under numbers—she thinks in _numbers_, and those I cannot fathom."

"That sounds like Ren," I admitted.

He looked away again.

"In a way, I'm glad I couldn't see her memories," he said in a low voice, "because that was before she… said those things about _your_ missing memories."

I was surprised when he grabbed my knee in one large hand, squeezing it with as much gentleness as the rough Hiei could muster.

"I would not invade your secrets like that," he said without looking at me, instead choosing to stare at the piano like it had personally offended him. "I would not, unless you let me. It's been done to me before, and it is the worst sin."

His words called to mind a YYH episode, the one where Mukuro looked inside Hiei's head. Was he perhaps referring to…?

"Now tell me your plan, Dani," he said. He took his hand off of my knee. "Now."

I put those thoughts aside, resolving to take them out and look at them later. I wanted to know what had happened between Hiei and Mukuro after all, so…

"I've been lucky so far," I said slowly. "Ren hasn't made any historical references about America yet."

"Why is that lucky?"

"Because I get the feeling that her world history isn't the same as mine." I pushed my hair out of my eyes slowly. "I can tell you more once I actually test my plan out. Can you wait until then?"

I thought he was going to say no, but then he didn't. He just closed his eyes, breathed in deeply, and let it go with a huff.

"Fine," he said.

"Good," I said. I lifted my hands to the piano keys, wanting to blot out the unpleasantness of the situation with some good music. "Want to tell me how these lyrics sound?"

Hiei listened without a word as I played 'Landslide' through, and when I was done, he didn't say a word until I made him. I could tell he wanted to make a comment, but given how tense he looked… I got the feeling he was afraid of offending me. It was sort of cute.

"So… did it sound good?" I asked. "And you can be honest. I want this to be good because it's, like, my favorite Fleetwood Mac song ever, so hearing a native Japanese speaker's opinion…"

Some of the tension left him, at that.

"Sometimes it was… clunky," he said, and he went on to name an example of a bad lyric. I corrected it in my notebook, played the moment back, and was gratified to earn his approval on the passage.

We went through several songs that way, with Hiei offering suggestions here and there. He didn't look very comfortable with the whole affair (I mean, this was basically poetry, after all, and Hiei wasn't the type for the arts) but thankfully I was already pretty tired and had to soon close my notebook.

"Well, this has been really helpful—thank you, Hiei," I said, but when I tried to stand up he reached out to grab my wrist.

"Wait," he said, but when I gave him an expectant look he just stared at me.

"Yes?" I asked.

He hesitated again, mouth parting in preparation for words… and then he looked at the piano.

"I… want to learn this thing," he said.

I blinked at him. "Wait, what?"

"I said I want to learn this thing!" he spat. To my intense astonishment his ears appeared to have reddened. "What do I do?"

Slowly, I took my seat and set my notebook aside.

"Well… you practice, I guess," I said. I had never had to teach someone to play an instrument before—much less a someone who was more used to killing people than to making music!—and had little idea where to begin. "Um… well, you square your feet, and keep your elbows at your sides, and you need to sit up straight…"

I slowly coached Hiei into a standard piano-playing position, a bit dazed at his sudden but vehement request. I shaped his hands, corrected his stance… and then he was looking at me expectantly, as if waiting for me to suddenly flip a switch and get him playing Mozart in one go.

"At this point, you just have to be able to read music, or hear pitches and play," I said. "And you need to get your hands used to making the motions of playing. Practice is the only way to get really good at this."

His stare did not waver, but his hands moved, slamming down onto the piano keys so that a horrible peal of angry music blared out at me. He kept going before I could react, pounding away at the keys and making an unholy racket until I practically had to throw myself across him to get him to stop.

"It's not doing what it does for you!" he snarled as I wrestled his hands off the keys. "Why?"

It took a while to convince Hiei that conquering a piano wasn't the way to get it to play—you had to be gentle, and intentional.

"Like when I played at dinner," I explained. "That song is loving and gentle. You can't just pound out Pachelbel's Canon and hope for the best!"

"Then how _do_ I play that song?" he snarled, glaring at the piano. "This infernal contraption, it—"

"Look, let's try something else," I said. I wracked my brains, but Pachelbel's Canon was suddenly stuck in them and—

"OK, I'm going to teach you something simple," I said. I grabbed Hiei's left hand and put it on top of mine, layering his warm fingers over my own digit-to-digit, with his palm on the back of my hand. He tried to flinch away, but I grabbed his wrist to keep him with me. His eyes were a little wild, in a confused way.

"Just move with me, OK?" I said softly, and I began to play a slow, sustained series of notes—eight of them, played over and over in a slow tempo; it was the bass line to Hiromi Uehara's jazz arrangement of the Canon, although Hiei didn't know it yet. We went through those eight notes at least a dozen times, until…

"I'm going to take my hand away, but you should try to keep playing," I said, and when I did Hiei obeyed me. His hand kept going, fumbling to remember the notes as I had taught them to him. As a reminder, I went up an octave and began playing in unison so he could watch my hand as he tried to keep on going. His face became a mask of utmost concentration, and when I dropped out of play a few minutes later he kept up his work without my help.

"Think you got those down?" I said, and he spared me a glance long enough to nod before looking back and becoming utterly absorbed in his eight note symphony. "All right. Well, don't stop playing, because I'm going to play the harmony."

My harmony line—played in unison with his higher up the scale—did confuse him the first time, but then he got used to it and kept up his end of the song. Soon he seemed to grow confident enough for me to up the ante and start weaving notes in and out of his solid tempo, until with my right hand I was playing a complex, triple-timed accompaniment to Hiei's bass line.

The song ended when Hiei jerked his hand off the keyboard with a hiss; I let my playing falter to watch as he began rubbing his palm against his leg, muttering under his breath.

"Cramp?" I asked with sympathy, and he nodded while looking sullen. "Yeah, you're going to need to build up muscle in your hands to play for extended periods."

"It looks so simple, but…" Hiei said, and he didn't finish his sentence in favor of glaring at the keys again. "When will I be able to play like _you_ do?"

"I've been playing since I was a kid, Hiei," I said. Then I shrugged. "It takes time and patience to play like me, I can tell you that much for sure… but I can teach you the basics if you want." I felt my cheeks color slightly, because my earlier worries had kind of numbed the fact that Hiei was sitting so close to me, and he was just so _warm_... "I mean… I know you're not the artsy type, but it would be nice to spend some time—I mean, it would be—"

Hiei started smirking as I babbled, so I shut myself up and tried not to look as nervous as he made me feel inside.

"It's late," he said after a time. "You need your sleep."

"Yeah," I said, and I stood up. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Dani."

I looked down at him. His lips were firm and thin, and his eyes…

"Sleep well," he said.

The sight of his not-smile followed me into my room, and then into my dreams.

* * *

The members of the SDF looked just like they did in the anime—meaning they looked stupid, because their uniforms were just about the dumbest things ever. Seriously, they had MC Hammer pants and _shoulderpads_ for Chrissake. Who the hell thought _that_ was a good idea? Plus, they all had these red patches right over their hearts, and that made me think they were pretty much painted with targets hearts, so… my overall first impression of them wasn't a very good one, at least as far as fashion goes.

For the life of me, I could not remember their names as I, the detectives, and everyone else in the temple stood on the porch and silently watched them appear in the courtyard. A glowing white sphere about the size of a VW Bug hovered ten feet above the ground; every few seconds an SDF member would jump out of it and land on the ground, step to the side, and fall into a strictly ranked line as they waited for more of their number to arrive.

The day was cold and windy. I shivered in my warmest item of clothing—a t-shirt under a sweatshirt, and jeans—and felt myself feel terrible for Ren, whose lack of fitted clothes meant she was drafty in the harsh wind. However, she seemed to stand up to it fairly well as she stood at my side and muttered about the physics of opening portals between dimensions.

"My theories would be a right sight more efficient than that lil' parlor trick," she muttered. "I mean, c'mon, they're usin' force to break shit when they could be—"

She went rigid next to me when she muttered that, and then she grabbed my duffel bag and began to paw through it.

I hardly noticed, however, because just then the portal spat out the brown-haired, mustached man I recognized as the SDF's leader, and then, after him, the prince of the Spirit World himself.

This Koenma looked so much different from my Koenma (uh, I mean, the _Future_ Koenma) that I almost felt my jaw drop. This one was just so clean, and pretty, and round-faced, and…

He stared us down with a half-smile, and then Genkai stepped out of our group and began to speak.

"Don't fuck up my home, you halfwits," she said in flawless monotone, and when the old lady skipped down the stairs with her bag on her shoulders and headed straight for the ranks of the perfectly aligned SDF, I saw more than one of them bristle. Still, they parted to let her pass right through them, and without a word Yusuke went after her. It was obvious he didn't like leaving Koenma in charge of what Yusuke probably thought of as _his_ case, because he shot the prince a glare before spitting and walking on.

"Easy," the leader of the SDF said when one team member made a motion like he was about to go after the ex-detective.

One by one we walked off the porch and down onto the courtyard pavement. Keiko followed Yusuke, and then came Yukina, Kuwabara, Kurama, and Botan, who followed the others down the stone stairs that led to the road and out of sight. Hiei went last, before Ren and I. He looked over his shoulder at me to tell me to come after him, so I reached for my bag—

Only to find that both it, and Ren, were gone.

I looked around, suddenly sacred because a missing, mischievous Ren never boded well for society, but I spotted her right away: She had hopped off the porch, foregoing the stairs entirely, and headed right for Koenma, pawing through my duffel all the while. The SDF quickly formed a ring in front of the prince; Ren bounced off one man's chest and stumbled back, but she just laughed and produced something from the bag with a flourish. It glinted red in the watery winter sun, but then the angle changed and I saw what she was holding.

"Mind translatin', Dani?" she chirped as she held out the notebook—_the_ notebook—to Koenma. "Wouldn't want to mess this up!"

"Sure," I said, struck almost mute by a single thought.

_This moment… this moment is responsible for _everything_._

And it was. Without the notebook, Koenma could never get me back from my home world, or send me to this one, or go back in time to reverse the wrath of the Beasts…

This moment was destiny, in its most simply designed form.

"Tell 'im that if things go to shit," Ren said, eyes on Koenma even as she spoke to me, "that there're tools in here he can use to make it all right again. Tell 'im that there's time travel, travel between worlds—"

I mechanically relayed her message, one which outlined many more theories, and Koenma listened with an impassive face.

"She says that she can't do all of this stuff herself, but that if you're a demigod, you should have no trouble," I said. Then I added some words of my own, tinged with unflattering desperation. "So please—take the theories. Just in case."

I feared, as Ren stood there proffering her hard work to Koenma, that he might not take the book from her, and if he didn't, what did that mean for me, for us, this world? Would I cease to exist? How had he gotten Ren's theories in the past, if they were on opposite sides? How had—

He did accept the book, though. One pale hand reached out and took it from her despite the skeptical looks of the SDF.

"Thank you," he said, and he gestured lightly at the blue pacifier clenched between his teeth. "I doubt it will come to using your ideas, however. The binding spell we're going to use on the Book is on the level of a Mafuken, after all."

I didn't bother translating that last part to Ren said, just telling her that he had said his thanks and that was that. I also didn't tell her just how relieved I was, because her actions—ones I had thought I should have been monitoring—had fallen so perfectly into place that it felt… well…

The only world I really have for it is 'fate', and the thought of my destiny being out of my hands frightens me beyond belief.

* * *

NOTES:

_Hiei. At. The. Piano. ZOMGWTF, I think he overheard Dani's advice to Yusuke and wanted to learn about Dani's interests. BA HA HA. Oh, that dummy._

_The Mafuken is Koenma's pacifier. It's a seal. Watch the Sensui arc for more details._

_I got an internship (yay!) but that means my weeks are full of work, making a Wednesday update rather unfeasible. Ergo, I'm switching to SUNDAYS, PEOPLE. What do you think?_

_So sorry for being bad with updates lately. I just haven't had a proper schedule yet this summer, which has made me fight for time to write, so… it's been real. _

_What could Dani's plan be to prove herself to Hiei? Oh my!_

_Many thanks to all you lovely readers out there! You rock my world! Eggbert3000, Reiko Tsuchikake, Kaiya's Watergarden, Takara Rose Oizumi, etowa-ru, ephemeral violet, Esprgirl, nanisan1955, KayTeeCee, Captain Lupus Ferus, Anon, Spiritfoxxx821, j.d.y., Koryu Elric, archangel fighter, TeacupKitty, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Strawberry Huggles, Yoko Kiara14, flamingmarsh, Madame Blaze, chocolateluvr13, phantomxofxmystery, Kai-Chan94, yonet-chan, Dyani91, Moldy Strawberry, AkaMixu-chan, NAO-chan33, colbub, Snowgirl7589, Caralirani, DaAmazingMeepers, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Anon (yeah, what was funny about your review was that I was quite literally composing a blog message when you sent it. What a difference five minutes makes!) and nevvy!_


	73. Chapter 73: Perfect Fit

Future Talk

Chapter 73:

"Perfect Fit"

* * *

Two gunmetal-grey minivans were parked at the foot of the temple stairs. Fresh tracks dug into the soft dirt path leading to the highway told me that they had been placed there earlier that day, but I didn't know who had done it and no one came forward to claim the good deed, either. Our entire group was mostly silent, a little on edge after seeing the SDF and Koenma breeze in and take the job we'd invested months of our lives into. I for one didn't think that was fair at all, and Yusuke? He grumbled the entire time we trudged down the temple's thousand stone steps, and no one made any moves to correct his sentiment that Koenma was a "glory-hogging cheat of a toddler". Even Botan (who looked a little uncomfortable when Yusuke really started in on the toddler king) didn't say a thing.

When we got to the vans, Kurama wordlessly took my duffel bag from Ren (who grinned at him and shot me a weird, conspiratorial wink) and threw it in the back of one of the cars; everyone else followed suit, loading all of their things into just one trunk—everyone except for Ren, at least, who, upon spotting the vans, started eyeing them with a very skeptical expression. They were beat up, and Ren had never been a big fan of driving (something about the inefficiency of gasoline and the general lack of safety had always bothered her) so I just accepted her rather unhappy van-induced expression as an extension of those worries and ignored her.

Anyway, we barely filled up even one trunk with our stuff. It wasn't like we had all that much, after all, since we were only going out of the temple for a weekend. Most of us simply carried a duffel, with the exception of Hiei, who was using a beat-up Human World backpack. I wondered where he'd gotten it, vaguely, but I didn't ask. It just didn't seem like the time.

It also didn't seem like the time to ask him about his outfit—not that I was _complaining _about his outfit, mind you, because he wore it very well indeed, but it's just really, really rare to see Hiei in human clothing so I couldn't help but stare at him just a bit. I mean, he was wearing _jeans_! And not only jeans, but a black shirt with no sleeves under what was probably the single most surprising part of his entire outfit, which just so happened to be… a leather jacket.

I _know_, right?

As strange as it was to see him in human clothes, the outfit suited him in an odd way; god knows he tries to keep up a bad-boy image, of sorts, so if Hiei were a human, I'd bet he'd be the leather-wearing type for sure, and in this outfit I could almost (almost, mind you) forget he was a demon if I thought of his eyes as contacts and his hair as a creative dye-job. He was wearing the boots he always wore, though, so I guess he needed at least one familiar item to keep him from feeling too human…

_No, wait, make that two items,_ I thought, because I noticed then that the chain supporting his tear-gem was visible, snaking down into the neck of his shirt like a little silver stream.

"Oh, thank goodness," Botan sighed in my ear. "I'm always afraid he'll wear that ratty old cloak of his in public!"

I flinched at her words, startled, because I had been distracted by trying to not stare at Hiei while he lounged against the trunk of one of the trees lining the forest path. I turned around to face Botan as she gawked at Hiei over my shoulder.

"He _does_ wear jeans rather well," she said, eyeing him critically. "I always forget how muscular he is, since he's so short, but he has this little tendency to take off his shirt during fights to remind us, and—"

I looked over my shoulder to judge that much for myself, but just then, Hiei (who had been looking off toward the road as if expecting something) whipped his head toward us with a scowl. Botan shut up with an 'eep', then babbled something about needing to talk to Yukina and scurried off. I shot Hiei a cheesy, nervous grin and looked away; his stare had some teeth on it.

I turned my attention back to the rest of the group because looking at Hiei was making my cheeks go red. What I found the others doing was rather humorous: While Genkai and Kurama were discussing seating arrangements and the plan of what we were to do in town, Kuwabara kept edging toward Yukina like he wanted to ask her something (like to ride with him, maybe?), but each time he came close she carefully (and sneakily) managed to move so that someone else was between her and the man so obviously pining for her affections. In the end it hardly mattered what Kuwabara did, though—Keiko declared (upon seeing that Yusuke was gearing up to pull a Kuwabara and approach her and probably ask her to ride with him) that we should dictate one van as a girls-only vehicle, which left the boys a free run of the other.

"We put all the luggage in the boys' car; we have tons of room for all the girls in one van!" she said when Kurama pointed out that the girls outnumbered the boys six to four. "I'm in the mood for a little girl talk!"

Genkai gave a derisive snort. "Not me, kiddo. I'll ride with the boys."

"Oh, well, we'll miss you!" Keiko hedged, frantically looking for some sort of escape since Yusuke was steadily creeping toward her... and then her eyes lit on me. Before I knew it, she had linked her arm up with mine and was tugging me toward the nearest van. "Let's go!"

The groups dissolved into the five girls (me, Ren, Keiko, Botan, and Yukina), in one van and the boys (plus Genkai) in the other. Botan took the keys from Kurama before climbing into the driver's seat; I sat with Ren in the very back while Yukina took shotgun and Keiko took the middle row for herself. The boys' car pulled away without much mishap while we were still trying to get buckled in, the impeccable Kurama behind the wheel, and as Botan lifted the car key and stared at it…

"Um," she said after looking down at the steering wheel with an odd little frown on her face, "um, so, _where_ do you put the key?"

A moment of silence followed her words. Then:

"Oh, Botan, you don't actually know how to drive, do you?" Yukina said.

"You _what_?" Keiko gasped.

"Now, now, it's just a car, I'm sure I can figure it out—" Botan started to say with her best cat-face in place, but Keiko began shouting the word 'no' over and over again and started trying to wrestle the keys out of Botan's hands.

"Do _you_ know how to drive, Keiko?" Botan demanded as she valiantly struggled to keep the keys in her grip. Her face had turned an alarming shade of purple. "Do you, Keiko, _do you_?"

This made Keiko pause. "Uh, well, no," she said, eyes darting sideways with sudden hope, "but Yukina—I'm sure _you_ do, right?"

"I am sorry, but we do not have any cars in Demon World, Keiko-chan," she said with her most apologetic voice. "I cannot drive us to Sakana."

Way back in the back, Ren leaned my way and said out of the corner of her mouth: "What're they arguing about?"

"Who's going to drive this thing," I replied, and then I leaned forward, held my hand out over Keiko's shoulder, and said: "Gimme."

The pair of them stopped arguing and blinked at me like stunned owls.

"Botan, you made me a license when we came back from the hotel, remember?" I said patiently. "_I_ can drive us."

Her face lit up, magenta eyes sparkling like firecrackers. "Oh, Dani, you're so smart!" she gushed as she unbuckled her seatbelt and tossed the keys back to me. "I had completely forgotten! How silly of me, to forget that you know how to drive!"

Grinning, I began climbing over Keiko on my quest to get to the driver's seat without actually exiting the car (hey, it was cold outside). Botan got out and hopped in next to Keiko, but as I began adjusting the seat height and the mirrors, I heard the pair of them gasp and shout Ren's name. I twisted in my seat to see what was up and found that Ren was scrambling out of the back row and squeezing herself between Keiko and Botan with a determined frown plastered across her mouth.

"What's all the commotion?" I quipped as Keiko fought to get Ren's akimbo arms out of her face.

Ren's frown didn't waver. "How do _you_ know how to drive this thing?" she asked.

"Uh, it's a _car_," I deadpanned.

Ren said: "A _what_?"

Before I could even begin to process the absurdity of Ren's very serious statement, I felt a tug on my sleeve.

"What is she asking, Dani-san?" Yukina asked.

"She's wondering how I know how to drive," I said to Yukina.

Keiko looked surprised. "Hey, Ren's right," she said. "How _do_ you know how to drive a car?"

My stomach gave a nervous flutter. "What do you mean?"

To which Keiko replied: "Well, I mean… Isn't today's technology different from when you lived in America?"

* * *

There's a moment that comes when things click into place that makes you feel like an utter idiot for not seeing the obviousness of the situation sooner. It's not a very nice moment, because you quite literally want to smack yourself on the cheek and ask the cosmic referees for a redo, but that's not really an option so the best thing to do in that state of affairs is to act with grace and a calm, cool head.

I, however, didn't. My reaction went a little more like this:

"Oh, _crap_," I said in stunned English. "I _knew_ I'd left a gaping plot hole somewhere!"

Ren's brow furrowed. "What the heck does that mean?"

"What was that, Dani?" everyone else chorused.

"Oh, um," I Englished (because yes, it's now a verb). "Oh, um, you see—"

"Dani, what's a car?" Ren asked.

"How do you know how to drive?" Keiko demanded.

"Oh dear," Yukina said.

"I'm very confused," Botan mumbled into her hand. She had pillowed her chin on her palm and was tapping her lips with her fingers. "Dani, can you please explain this?"

Despite Botan's claim that I needed to explain things, I _was_ explaining things—but to _myself_, in my _head_. Ren's odd look when she saw the vans, ugh, why hadn't I suspected this _sooner_? Of _course_ Old America had different technology from New Japan! Why hadn't I taken that into account before? I'd spent hours thinking about the differences between the two time periods (I'd _had to_ when I came up with my plan to convince Hiei I was from another world), and yet I'd skipped something this important?

_Think, Dani, think think think!_ I told myself as the girls around me all started voicing questions, getting louder and louder as they all began trying to vie for my attention at once. _How the hell can you explain this?_

"OK, OK!" I yelled when the babbling around me reached a fever pitch. The girls abruptly fell silent at my verbal explosion, staring at me with pronounced expectation, but Ren's look was the most intense so I addressed her first.

"This thing we're sitting in is a 'car'," I slowly Englished. "It runs on gasoline and it's what people today use to get around. I've been in this time period long enough to learn how to drive one. Happy?"

She wasn't. "These people are _archaic_!" she sputtered. "Fossil fuels? How in the world can they sustain—"

Botan and Keiko (who were still sandwiching Ren) started leaning away from her as she began to rant and rave about the depravity of using such terrible methods of fueling. I whistled to get their attention, and then I spoke in Japanese.

"The transport we had back in my day was sort of similar to this," I carefully lied. "Two pedals, a steering wheel—the only difference is the fuel."

Botan and Keiko looked at one another, leaning forward so they could see around the wildly-gesticulating Ren.

"Sounds fine to me," Botan said.

"Me, too," Keiko said. She looked up at Yukina. "Yukina?"

The ice apparition gave a kind smile. "I'm afraid that I don't know much about any of this, but… that sounds plausible."

"Of course it does; it's the only truth," I said brusquely. I jammed the key into the ignition and turned it, feeling the engine sputter to life beneath me with the same eagerness to get away from the situation as I was feeling. "Let's go. We have a lot of catching up to the boys to do."

When I drove down the dirt road to the highway, I went a little faster than I should have; the girls kept flinching when we went over big bumps but I couldn't help but move with a little franticness. My heart was beating fast because Ren—whom I had reluctantly decided to not tell about me being from another world, at least for the time being—had almost discovered a hole that could have blown my story to smithereens. If I had overlooked such a major facet of the differences between my world and hers, what _other_ minefields might I accidentally wander into, knowing as little as I did?

Come to think of it—what minefields had I narrowly avoided when I had spoken to Ren before I'd even considered that our worlds were too different to go unnoticed?

_I've got to be more careful,_ I told myself as we made it onto the smooth highway asphalt. _Until I know where I stand… there's no other choice._

* * *

I learned three things on that car ride.

The first was Keiko's favorite song. She was obsessed with the Supiro Hitani ballad that was all the rage on the radios, and when it came on during our trip, she made everyone in the van go utterly silent so she could sway and mouth the lyrics. The song reminded me of "Every Time" but without the same depth of melody, which was saying something considering that "Every Time" wasn't all the complicated to begin with. That should tell you a little bit about the music of that day and age, which had still failed to impress me with its lack of inflection.

The second thing I learned was that Yukina was well-known—popular, even—in Sakana. The topic came up when we passed a few cars on the way to the village and Yukina was able to tell us who owned each and every one. As it turns out, she spent most of her days off in the village to learn about humans; she was quite popular with children and adults alike since she volunteered at several places, like the library and the daycare, and did a great job in all of them.

_She's almost criminally sweet,_ I found myself thinking as she talked about an animal shelter in need with more emotion than I probably could muster even in a critical moment. _And the way she treats Kuwabara… it's for his own good, but still, it must be killing her._

Yukina and I had talked, ages ago, about her relationship with Kuwabara, and I had talked with the man himself about it as recently as Ren's awakening, but since then I'd only seen them dance around one another, making no real progress (or even much anti-progress) in their quest for a relationship, or whatever it was they wanted.

_I feel bad for them,_ I thought as I drove and recalled how torn up Yukina had sounded when, so long before, she had talked to me about how she could never give Kuwabara children, or—

Thinking about her troubles, however, made me recall hidden ones of my own, ones I hadn't articulated to anyone in this entire world (except for maybe Lauren, but since this Ren wasn't the same I wasn't even sure she counted) and I quickly stopped going down that mental road. There was no point in depressing myself, after all…

At any rate, the third fact I learned on that car ride was that Botan gets carsick sometimes. Badly.

I won't go into detail on that one.

* * *

We parked the vans nose-to-nose in the mall's rather crowded parking lot. Kuwabara looked a little confused when I climbed out of the driver's seat, saying: "Wait, Dani—"

"I drove us home from the hotel, remember?" I said rather tiredly. I thumbed the pop-trunk button and hopped around to the back of the van on my good foot so I could extricate my oversized staff from the otherwise empty trunk. Sweet immediately felt less tense; she tended to get a little stressed without her totem nearby, which made me in turn feel a tad wound up. I'd only realized the correlation between not having my staff and feeling snappish when I'd gotten rather jerky about the volume of the radio during our long car ride; Sweet explained, in her own silent way, that I was channeling her own discomfort.

Despite my newfound consolation, however Genkai walked over to me and snatched the staff out of my hand without compunction. I staggered against the van with a cry, only to bite it back when she produced my white sword cane out of nowhere and shoved it into my flailing hands.

"No one uses staffs like yours," she said when I gave her a half-hearted glare. She put the staff back in the trunk and shut the door. "We're trying to be incognito. We stand out enough as it is without your little toy."

"It's not a toy," I protested, but then Genkai's eyes flickered to Botan (who was mapping out their plan of attack on the mall with Keiko), and then Hiei (who was standing off talking quietly with Kurama), and I understood what she meant. Botan's blue hair didn't look fake in the slightest, and Hiei… well, as much as I liked to kid myself that his outfit made him look more human, it was still hard to mistake him as such. A hardcore cosplayer, maybe at a stretch, but otherwise…

"What's up with that stick of yours, anyway?" Ren said, coming to stand next to me with a curious expression. "What was it made out of? Looked like glass, but—"

_Shit, still gotta explain Sweet to her,_ I thought, but I just said: "It was a souvenir from the people who took care of the pods while we were sleeping. I'll tell you more about it later."

This seemed to placate Ren, at least for the moment, as she nodded and smiled and generally acted like she was just happy to be alive. Typical Ren, really.

"OK, people," Genkai said. We all looked at her; she'd climbed up to precariously balance of the van's back bumper, so she could see all of us despite her height. "We need to get clothes for Ren. Other than that, I don't really give a crap about what you do, because I'm going to find a quiet place to sit away from all you idiots. We meet back at the vans at six this afternoon. Be late, and you get left behind." She hopped off the bumper with a grunt, hands clasped behind her back. "Bye."

The old woman trotted off across the parking lot without a backward glance. I watched her go with mixed emotions; separating didn't feel like a good idea with Seishou and Ryu both on the loose, but this was Genkai we were talking about, so it was OK, wasn't it?

"Oh, Dani, quit you're worryin'—she'll be fine," Ren said. She clapped me on the back and then ruffled me hair. "That's one tough broad, if you ask me!"

"Who said I was worried?" I said sullenly.

"Your face," Ren replied—and she probably would have said more had two smiling girls not grabbed her arms and started beaming up at Ren's suddenly bewildered face.

"Well, you heard Genkai," Botan chirped. "You need clothes!"

"And we're just the girls to dress you!" Keiko added.

"Uh, what?" Ren stammered as she stared down at them, but before I could translate and before she could find out that she needed to protest, the girly masterminds had carted her off toward the mall so forcefully Ren's feet hardly touched the ground. Botan said something about Ren having a "model-tall body" (yeah, good luck putting Ren in anything frilly) as they walked off, but I couldn't hear her very well and just shook my head.

"Poor Ren," I said sadly. "She _hates_ shopping."

"Then she's in very bad company," Kuwabara laughed. He turned to Yukina. "Isn't that right, Yukina-chan?"

The ice apparition gave him a smile, of sorts, but it was little more than a polite mask. "I suppose so," she said, and before anyone could say another word she had turned and begun to quickly follow Ren, Keiko, and Botan across the lot. It was a clear dismissal, and an almost rude one (especially for someone as mild as Yukina).

Kuwabara's face fell as he slowly and uncertainly began trailing after he, but before he could get far Yusuke had wrapped an arm around his rival's shoulder.

"Aw, cheer up, buddy," the ex-detective said. "Keiko's ignoring me, too." His face lit up. "Hell, why don't we hit up the arcade like old times? Just you n' me, big guy, what do you say?"

Kuwabara didn't look too cheered by this offer, though he didn't exactly complain. He just nodded with a sad face and allowed Yusuke to steer him toward the mall, which doubtless held their video gaming hub.

This left Kurama, Hiei, and I alone.

"So, what are your plans?" Kurama asked after the three of us awkwardly looked at one another in silence. He regarded me first, then Hiei. "Are the two of you planning on going off alone?"

"No," I said, just as Hiei said 'yes'. We looked at one another in surprise.

"I mean," I corrected as Hiei's eyes flashed a danger sign mixed with a dose of hurt, "we haven't made plans yet, but, um… Hiei, did you want to, I dunno, go do something…?"

"Yes, I did," Hiei snapped despite my lack of an actual _something_ for us to go do. He turned Kurama's way. "Well?"

Kurama held up his hands; Hiei was making it quite clear that the fox was not welcome, and Kurama is anything but stupid. "Well, then, I suppose I shall make myself scarce," he said jokingly. "Perhaps I'll go find Genkai."

"We'll probably just go sit somewhere," I told him along with a wave of my hand. "My foot, you know?"

"Of course," Kurama said. He pivoted on his heel and headed off in the same direction as the others. "Have fun, and keep alert."

Hiei waited until Kurama vanished inside the mall's wide doors (which were shining in the midday sun across the lot like glass mirages) before saying anything to me.

"We're just going to 'sit somewhere'?" he asked with genuine confusion mixed with just a little ire. "What about your plan to prove you're from another world? What happened to that?"

"I couldn't very well mention it in front of Kurama, could I?" I shot back. Without any further explanation I headed toward the glass doors, just like everyone else had. My cane clicked against the asphalt.

Hiei dashed to my side, hands shoved in his pockets. "What's your plan?" he asked as the doors automatically whooshed open in front of us. I walked through them with a mental sigh, gearing up to tell my story.

"It's," I began, but then I realized that Hiei wasn't next to me. I turned around to find him still standing just outside, looking at the doors like they were snakes whose heads needed some major cutting off.

He caught me looking and scowled. I raised an eyebrow.

"There's a motion sensor that tells when people are coming and opens the doors for them," I slowly explained. "It's a human thing."

Hiei's scowl deepened. He lifted a hand and waved it through the space between the open doors, quickly pulling back his fingers as if scared the doors might bite him.

"…they're not going to try to close on you, if that's what you're worried about."

When Hiei's wary expression did not waver, I heaved an actual sigh and walked over to him, grabbing him by the tip of his leather sleeve so I could pull him into the mall's interior after me. He dragged his heels, though, making me feel like I was leading a small child to the dentist's chair.

"Nothing to be scared of, silly," I said once we were inside. I scanned the area around us, looking for something specific. "But don't worry—I'll protect you."

Hiei looked away, ears going just the slightest shade of incriminating pink.

We were in the food court. People were everywhere, though most of them were either teenage girls or members of families. Many of them coming from a wing to our left carried rectangular whites boxes under their arms; I wondered why, but I decided not to dwell on it as I walked over to a big map of the mall, one of the ones most malls tended to put in somewhere on their premises. I scanned its list of shops before orienting myself on the location of a specific store I need and walking off in its general direction.

"Where are we going?" Hiei asked as he dogged my steps like… well, a dog.

"You'll see," I told him. I spotted the store I wanted and stopped before entering it, catching Hiei by the arm so I could pull him in front of me.

"OK," I said after a deep breath. "I want you to keep something in mind."

Hiei just looked at me.

"In the year 1492," I said, "Columbus sailed the ocean blue—and I know that doesn't mean much to you, but remember that year. 1492. Can you do that for me?"

Reluctantly, Hiei repeated: "1492."

I beamed at him. "Great."

I promptly led Hiei into the bookstore, a cozy shop that smelled of fresh paper and ink and was crowded wall to wall with shelves full of new reading material. A section at the back had a smattering of tables around a coffee bar, forming a place where patrons could sit and read while sipping drinks. It was a cute setup; I found myself wanting to spend some time there when all of this was over.

Anyway, all of the books were (of course) in Japanese, and since kanji and I are only sometimes on speaking terms (hey, I could speak the language pretty damn near perfectly after what I'd been through, but I hadn't had much of a chance to read it) I immediately approached the clerk and asked him to point me in the direction of the music and history sections. He led me over to them with a bright smile, asking if I was looking for anything specific.

"Uh, yes, actually, and I was wondering if you could help me find some titles," I said.

"Can't read kanji?" the clerk asked conversationally. I must have looked surprised, because he tipped me a wink and said: "I figure you're not Japanese. You don't look it and you have an accent, but I can't place it. Where are you from?"

"I'm afraid that's none of your business."

Hiei was the one who said that; I shot him a sharp look. The clerk looked quite offended.

"Sorry, my boyfriend's having a rough day," I hastily tried to amend. "I, um, need books on musical history, preferably pre-sixteenth century, and I'd also like some books on ancient history, preferably European."

The clerk paused in front of a shelf, frowning. "By _ancient_ European, do you mean things like Greek mythology, or just general before-common-era stuff, like Alexander the Great? Or do you want philosophers, like Plato? Or do you want the _old_ old stuff—like archaeology, you know?" He scratched the back of his neck with a laugh. "I'm not good with history, so…"

"Uh, I'd take _all of them_, except maybe the archaeology, if you have them," I stammered, surprised out of my mind to see him pull a large, colorful volume off the shelf that had what appeared to be a picture of Zeus on it, and make references to a time measurement, mythos, and historical figure I was familiar with. I mean, I'd come to suspect that I'd know _some_ historical figures, but—

The clerk pulled about ten volumes off the shelves, but when he tried handing them to me, he thought better of it and offered them to Hiei. The apparition took them without a word.

"Is it OK if we just flip through them for a bit?" I asked, jerking a thumb at the tables.

The clerk smiled. "I'd normally ask you to buy something, but today's a slow day. Everyone's kimono shopping for the festival later."

I thought of the people with the long white boxes under their arms. They'd mostly been young people and families… was that what those boxes were?

"Anyway, I need warm bodies in here to make this place look approachable," the clerk said. "Enjoy yourself!"

"Thanks," I said, meaning it more than the man could possibly know. "C'mon, Hiei, let's go."

We sat down at one of the small tables; Hiei put the books in front of me and watched as I began reading the titles aloud. Luckily, most of them had hiragana and katakana phonetic spellings under them so I didn't have too much trouble.

"Let's see what we've got… _Illustrated Ancient Greek Myth_," I said, setting it aside, "_Civil Politics of the Ancient Roman Senate_… probably not gonna get much use out of that one…"

What formed were two piles, one pile I planned on using and the other I didn't know enough about to effectively use. Hiei watched me sort the books in anticipatory silence

"OK," I said once I had gathered up my thoughts. I grabbed a copy of _The Evolution of European Music_ and looked at the table of contents before handing it to Hiei. "So, I don't want to look past the 1500's because that's when I think things started to change, probably, so—" A thought struck me. "Hey, do demons read Japanese?"

Hiei did not look amused by that. "Most can't," he said. "They have no need to."

Tentatively, I said: "But can you?"

His lips pursed, as if he were recalling an unpleasant memory. "Kurama took it upon himself to make sure I became… literate," he growled.

Even though I really, _really_ wanted to hear that story (it did sound pretty interesting, after all) I didn't ask for an explanation. Hiei didn't look like he was happy even remembering the incident, much less recounting it for an audience.

"Oh. Good. Cool," I covered. "I just thought I'd ask." I took a deep breath. "Now, back in my world, I was pretty good at history. I liked it because it was mostly just reading and I'm good at that."

He crossed his arms over his chest, tucking the book I'd handed him into his bent elbow. "Your point?"

"Getting there," I said, arranging the books neatly in front of me. "While I've been here, Kurama and Kuwabara have both made references to historical events… that happened in _my_ world, as well as this one."

Hiei's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. I pointed at the book in the crook of his arm.

"My theory is that, maybe prior to the discovery of America, _my world's history_ and _this time period's history_ could be similar." I laughed a little. "The history of America that Ren described is nothing like the one I know. It would be a lot easier if you could just fact-check her mind against mine and look at the differences, but we've already established you can't, so all that's left is checking me against the books. I'd also ask you to check my memories against what you already know about the human world, but somehow, I don't think you know much."

He nodded at that last part, not offended in the least by it (Hiei was above such things, I suppose), but then he scowled. "So what was with the year you told me to remember?" Hiei said, staring down at the book like it was something scary. "1492?"

"That was the year a Spanish explorer named Columbus sailed across the ocean and discovered America," I explained. "I figure that since America didn't exist when he existed—I mean, I don't know if your time even _had_ a Columbus like mine did, or if he did anything worth noting since all he really did in my world was discover America, but… well, I figure that that's the one major difference between my history and yours, and things will start to differ after that point in time." I pointed at the word 'ancient' on the cover of one book. "That's why I'm focusing on the pre-1492 stuff. If my theory is right, it should remain largely unchanged."

Hiei nodded slowly; then he flipped open the book on European music to a random page. I took a deep breath before slowly asked him to find the chapter on the thirteenth century, and to look for any mention of the composer Pérotin. He found it after a few minutes of slow, slow searching (Hiei had never been hooked on phonics, I don't think, not even with Kurama as a tutor), and when he gave me a nod I listed everything I could about the man—where he'd lived, some of his musical theory, his most famous works, all of it. Hiei asked me to slow down or repeat information a few times, and when I'd told him all I could about Pérotin, he turned to another point in the book and listed out a name. Happily, I realized I knew that composer, so I told Hiei everything I knew about him, too.

When I told him about maybe five different composers, Hiei gently set the book aside and reached for another in the usable pile. He made no move to tell me if I'd matched any information or not, and his face…

_I'm never challenging him to a poker match, ever,_ I thought as I contemplated if I'd done a good job or not. I knew all of the names he wanted me to talk about, but what if nothing else I said matched up to them? What if Beethoven produced everything Chopin ever made, or something ridiculous?

The next volume happened to be the one on Greek myth. Hiei just told me to start talking, so I began with the stories I knew about the world's conceptions, the titans, the birth of the gods, Pandora, Prometheus… Hiei kept his eyes fixed on the book, and when I'd gone on and on for at least thirty minutes, he held up a hand to stop me in the middle of talking about Artemis.

"She was the huntress who killed the giant, when he was out at sea," he said, looking thoughtful. "Her brother tricked her into it because he was jealous, and the giant's name was… Orion?"

I gaped at him; I hadn't covered that story yet. "How did you _know_ that?"

"_You_ told me," he said as if it were obvious.

"You mean, you remember this story from my memories?" I asked.

"No," he said. "On the roof, you told me a story about the stars."

I looked at him blankly. His earnest expression turned to one of disgruntled disappointment.

"Forget it," he said. "It was a long time ago."

I wracked my brains, and then in an instant I recalled him jumping up with me to the roof after we fought over training in the woods, where he'd left me to wander in theta state for hours. "Oh, I remember!" I hastened to assure him, and when I did he looked a tad bit more chipper. "I was telling you that the constellations were the same where I came from." I scratched the back of my neck, thinking about it. "Which makes sense, I suppose. If both our worlds had ancient Greeks, _and_ the same constellations, it makes sense that they'd make up the same stories about the same stars. I think."

Hiei didn't say anything to that. He just grabbed another book.

We worked our way through all of the books—music history, general ancient history, myth, all sorts of stuff, and it wasn't until I'd finished telling him what little I remembered about the ancient Egyptians that he put the final text aside and stared at me, hands in his lap, without saying a single word.

It was a bit unnerving. Sure, the plan to prove that I knew the impossible and, therefore, _was_ the impossible had seemed like a good idea, but Hiei wasn't saying a word, so what the heck did that mean?

"So," I eventually said. I twisted my cane in my lap, feeling my hands catch tackily on the smooth, dry wood. "So, um…"

"I need time to think about this," he snapped. Eyes flashed up to meet mine; in them I saw confusion, and anger, which probably came from Hiei not understanding everything completely (being confused just doesn't sit well with him).

"Fine," I said, a little hurt by his look even though it wasn't actually meant for me. I started to stand up. "Would you like to go somewhere else? I know that a human mall—"

"I'm fine here," Hiei said. His hand lashed out and grabbed the music book, flipping it open on the table even though he didn't focus his eyes on it to read.

Slowly, I sat back down, surprised that Hiei actually wanted to stay here rather than go somewhere else. Hell, I had been surprised by the sheer fact he had even elected to go inside the mall to begin with. He certainly didn't seem comfortable as we sat there in tense silence, him staring at the book as I stared at him, waiting for whatever it was he was trying to figure out.

_Why do I feel like this is going to be a long, awkward wait?_ I found myself thinking. Suddenly, my thoughts shifted from the matter of proving I was from another world and to the matter of Hiei, the guy I, uh, _L-word-ed_, sitting across from me, and I hadn't even blushed once that day. _And why do I feel like I'm going to embarrass myself in front of Hiei at __some point__? I sure hope I don't trip…and oh god, I'm going to babble at Hiei like an idiot, too, I just know it…_

I was still coming to terms with loving him, after all. Babbling was to be expected. Still, I worried, and my hand absently wandered into the kangaroo pouch of my sweatshirt.

_I'm just lucky I thought to bring my songbook, _I thought, running my finger down the metal spiral holding the pages together. _I can work on this while I wait for him to do whatever it is he's doing… maybe then I won't make a fool of myself, if I'm distracted…_

I pulled the notebook out and slipped the ballpoint pen from the spiral; Hiei glanced up, catching my eye, but then he looked away again and I bent to start working.

I didn't get far, however, because just then someone called my name. Looking up revealed none other than Kurama coming through the book stacks toward us.

"Oh, hey," I said as he came to our table. "I figured you went and found Genkai."

"She escaped me, I'm afraid," Kurama said. He reached out one long-fingered hand and traced the title of the Greek mythology book. "I did not know you were interested in this, Hiei. It's a rather obscure human religion, after all, and it's not even a modern one." Green eyes glittered. "Dani, did you put him up to this?"

Hiei just growled and snatched the book away. Kurama just laughed, then looked down at me with a conspiratorial smile.

"Did you know, Dani," he said in a low voice, "there is a music store in this mall?" His lips quirked with a smile. "Turn left out of this store and keep going. You can't miss it."

I didn't need to be told twice; my chair legs squeaked when I stood up, thanked Kurama, and grabbed all the books (even taking the one Hiei was holding right out of his hands, which he did not like one bit). I haphazardly shoved them back onto their shelves and marched off like my shoes were on fire, only bothering to thank the clerk when he shouted a 'goodbye' at me. I was a woman on a mission; nothing could stop me, not even social standards of politeness!

Hiei, of course, went after me without a word to Kurama _or_ the clerk, coming to walk at my side even though he had to slow down to compensate for my labored stride. In the excitement of thinking about a music store, all thought of his 'I need to think' stuff had gone out of sight, out of mind.

"Do you think they have guitars?" I asked Hiei absently as I tried to concentrate on walking. "I really hope they have guitars. It's been so long since I've played a guitar—ooh, and a full drum kit, I hope they have one of those!" I could feel a smile make my lips part when I heaved happy sigh. "Maybe they'll have a synthesizer, too!"

"A what?" Hiei said.

"A thing you use to mix music after you record it," I said. My mood fell considerably when I thought of something potentially tragic. "Oh, I really hope it's not just a CD store," I fretted. "I should've asked Kuram…ah…"

At that point I trailed off, however, because the shop had come into view. Glass paneling at the front revealed, shining under bright lights and neon signs, two glossy electric guitars—one a violet six-string and the other a black bass—and a drum set in red and chrome. A keyboard had been propped up against a half-stack speaker, atop which sat a sign that proclaimed in big letters all the things the shop sold: guitars, bass, drums, woodwinds, strings, picks, sheet music, amps, pedals…

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!" I twittered like an idiot. I stopped in front of the window and grabbed Hiei's arm on reflex, pointing with my cane at the display. "Look at that guitar! It's _gorgeous_!"

Hiei looked down at me with a surprised scowl. "It is?"

"Uh-huh," I said… and then I remembered that I was holding on to Hiei and quickly let him go, smoothing down my sweatshirt as I tried not to meet his eyes. I was sure my face had gone scarlet (there was that blush I'd been expecting!); my hands still tingled with his overt warmth. "I'm, um, gonna go inside…"

Even though the shop was in a mall, it still had a front door with one of those electronic bells to alert the clerk that he had a visitor. No one greeted us when we came in, though; maybe the shopkeeper hadn't heard us? Whatever the case, no clerk meant that I could wander in on my own, which I eagerly did. The store appeared to have just about everything, organized into asymmetrical sections of different instruments types, and the decorations were minimal since most of the wall space had been dedicated to mounting the more expensive instruments (you don't want customers to be able to touch your best stuff without supervision, after all). They had a huge guitar wall, another wall devoted to bass, a drum neighborhood, a sky-scraper section of towering speakers, cases of stringed instruments and woodwinds, and a huge library of sheet music and blank tablature, too. I was surprised that such a large store could fit inside the mall, but I was far from complaining about it as I made a beeline for the guitars.

"Oh, hello, baby," I cooed as I reached for one of the lower ones hanging on the acoustic wall. It had a dark, glossy black finish and a red pickguard, with the saddle and pegs in goldtone. Someone had dragged a drum stool over to the guitars before I'd gotten there, but even though it wasn't mine I still sat on it and settled the guitar in my arms. "Oh baby, you are _so_ _beautiful_…"

I slowly tuned the guitar's six strings, listening for the notes and twisting the pegs to get them back in synch.

"C'mon, baby," I murmured to it when the G string stubbornly wavered above pitch. "C'mon, get it for me… there we go, that's my boy..."

To me, most acoustic guitars are male; electrics tend to be female, but depending on body style and color, this is a flexible classification of hypothetical gender. I don't know quite why, but I've always thought of my instruments as people. Helps me connect, you know?

Once I got the guitar in tune, I began picking out a melody with the edge of my thumbnail, wishing that I had a proper pick so I could get a cleaner sound—but then I realized that my driver's license, which Botan had re-summoned for me during our trip, was still in my pocket, so I took that out and used its edge as a makeshift pick. I wasn't familiar with this world's guitar brands, but I seemed to have picked up a good quality piece and I quickly felt my hands mold to its contours as if I'd known this instrument all my life. Muscles I hadn't used since I'd last played a full-size acoustic started waking up, stretching…

"My hands just don't feel _right_ when they're not wrapped around a guitar," I said as I began a more complex tune, one that melded in on itself in an unending loop. "Mmm, this is good."

"What song is that?"

I flinched and stopped playing, clamping my picking hand over the strings to mute them. I'd almost forgotten that Hiei had been standing over me, watching me baby talk the guitar and—

_Oh god_, I thought when I looked up at him and found him staring at me with an open, interested expression. _I've been cooing, haven't I? Please, don't let him mention—_

"And why were you talking to that thing?" he said, bursting my hopeful bubble with one well-aimed sentence.

"It's a guitar, not a thing," I said, sullenly tucking my hair behind my ears.

Hiei's eyebrows rose, almost imperceptibly. "It's not like it can hear you, you know."

"I'm not stupid, Hiei," I snapped.

His lips went a little thinner. "I never said you were."

We both went quiet after that. My ears burned, and even though I probably should have, I didn't apologize for snapping at him.

"The song is called 'Trapeze Swinger'," I eventually told him to break the heavy silence. I started to play it again, trying to keep a crisp rhythm despite the clunky card I was using for a pick.

The fire demon shoved his hands into his jean pockets, and I felt a little nervous when he gave me an expectant look. "Well?" he said.

"Well what?" I asked, fidgeting.

His eyes seemed to glitter, though with what I couldn't say. "Are you going to sing it, or aren't you?"

My mouth gaped open for a second, but then I remembered that 'Trapeze Swinger' had been one of the songs I'd actually worked on translating the day before. Clearing my throat as I pulled the notebook out of my pocket, I flipped it open and began rifling through the pages in search of the proper song.

"I couldn't get _all_ the verses," I said, stalling as I put the notebook on my knee. "There are a lot of them—the song's really long and stuff, so I—"

"Just play it," Hiei said. He walked over to one of the few empty spots on the guitar wall, which just so happened to be right next to where I was sitting, and leaned on it. This meant I couldn't see him while I played since we both had our backs to the wall. I mean, I could still feel his eyes on me, but since he was out of my line of sight…

_Is he doing that to make me less nervous?_ I thought as I took a deep, cleansing breath. _That's sort of nice of him._

The song basically plays the same notes over and over again, occasionally changing key but always maintaining the same general chord progression. The verses are an unbroken string of thoughts that describe people finding themselves, heaven, all voiced with the frame of "please remember me" followed by an adjective that defines the tone of the next few verses. It's a lovely song that should, by all its repetitive rights, be criminally boring, but the charm of its lyrics somehow makes it transcend that.

I played four verses of the song before I ran out of my translated lyrics, so I sat back for a bit, flipped a few pages over, and began chopping out Hey Monday's "Candles", the acoustic version. It had a totally different feel than the other song, lots of nice slides and sharper chops without much precision picking, and I was really getting into it when—

I clapped my hands over the strings to shut my guitar up. Someone in the store's depths had begun playing quite loudly on a drum kit to the accompaniment of someone playing an electric rhythm guitar. The song was a bouncy one that needed a bluesy baseline the way a starving man needs a good steak, so I listened with half a horrified ear to the way the players were trying to make the song sound good without any jazz or blues behind them.

"They _need_ some blues in that," I complained to no one in particular. My fingers began strumming a line to accompany the song on reflex, even though the acoustic wasn't in the best register to match the other, unseen players. "It's just so empty-sounding!"

Hiei appeared beside me; I'd somehow managed to forget he'd been standing behind me, and I jumped as he cocked his head to one side and listened. I watched him with sudden interest, wondering what he was thinking when his brow knit.

"I… can hear that," he said, face contorting into a frown when he met my eyes. "It's like there are spaces that need filling."

"That's a really good way to put it, Hiei," I told him, impressed. I gave his shin a sly nudge with my toe. "Wanna help them out a bit?"

He looked down at me with a frown. Carefully, I stood up and put the guitar back in its spot on the wall, and after retrieving my cane I walked over to the electric basses. Picking out one that looked and felt a lot like a simple Fender Squire, I wandered over to the amps and managed to find one that was actually plugged in. I connected my bass to it and put the amp on a low volume, tuning it with my ear next to speaker so I didn't interrupt the other people playing.

Playing bass is nice because you don't actually need a pick most of the time; slap-bass uses the heel of the hand and the fleshy part of the thumb to get the kind of sound the Red Hot Chili Pepper's bassist, Flea, uses to make their distinctive sound really pop, and the rest of the time people tend to use alternating middle and pointer fingers to quickly vibrate the ultra-thick strings. I sat on top of one of the sturdier amps and slipped the bass's strap over my head, letting my small hands get used to the extremely wide-spaced fret-board as I stretched them by forming the widest chord I could, way high up on the instrument's neck.

"I could really strain something on this instrument if I'm not careful," I told Hiei when he stood before me, watching me shake out my stretch and resettle my left hand on the neck. "See how big the frets are? I'm not too good at bass because my hands just aren't big enough for the deep chords."

The other people were still playing. I listened to their rhythm for a few seconds before reaching below me and turning my amp up to a high volume, and then, when they began to repeat a section of their song that was obviously the chorus…

"Watch this," I quipped, and I slapped out a funk-influenced groove that wove under and complemented the guitarist's efforts and played with the blank parts of the drumline, filling in the chinks that gave the music enough heart to actually be listenable. My playing wasn't perfect, or virtuosic, and it wasn't even all that good on a technical level, but I knew enough about music and what it needed to make up for my lack of skill on the bass, and I thought my bassline went with the music very well indeed.

However, my intrusion caught the other people by surprise, and they faltered into silence. Hiei let out a concerned hiss at that, but I just shouted into the air: "Hey, try to keep up, guys!"

And they did. The drummer popped back in with the same beat and the guitar joined soon after, and I came in last with a vengeance. We jammed for what felt like a decade; I could tell the others were cheered by having another instrument join in because we got lost in the cascades of notes and started pressing boundaries and experimenting, weaving in and out around each other in turn, one by one breaking free from the rhythm while the others carried it so we could strut our stuff in little mini-solos and deviations into the unknown.

Music is communication, plain and simple. I didn't need to know or even see the other musicians to know what they wanted, because I could read their changed in progression as easily as I could read words on a page.

Music is universal; as I played with these unseen players, I realized on a deep, unspoken level that it didn't matter what world I was from, in the end.

In all of worlds, after all, there would be music.

Eventually the song reached an end. We finished with flourishes and the drummer went a little crazy, but soon enough the room lapsed into contented silence… which was soon broken by someone tripping over something with a curse, and then there were footsteps and two people rounded a halfstack amp and strode into view.

The first man was short and thin, a shaved head with a full beard and an eyebrow piercing, probably in his late twenties or early thirties. He was dressed like a punk cowboy, with lots of leather and boots and jeans. He took one look at me and a grin broke out across his face.

"Wasn't expecting a girl," he said gleefully. He nudged his tall friend in the ribs before walking over and pounding me hard on the back. "Way to play, buddy! What's your name?"

"Dani," I said, grinning in return (though I had to shoot Hiei a 'calm down' look when he glared when the guy touched me). "What's yours?"

"Takeru," he said. "And this is my buddy Nobu!" He looked over his shoulder and rolled his eyes. "Nobu, come say hello!"

The other man came forward; he'd been hanging back in silence, but when I got a good look at him…

"Wait a minute," I said slowly, because I thought he looked vaguely familiar, and the Nobu guy winced.

"_Told you_ I didn't want to come out here," he muttered as I stared at him, and the second I heard his voice—

Takeru just shrugged. "Hey, she just saved your new song. You owe her."

"Wait a minute!" I said. I pointed at Nobu, feeling my jaw drop. "You're that _dude_!"

I had recognized him, you see—he had down-home, pleasant features, what would probably be a nice smile, nice eyes, short-cropped brown hair, modest clothing… and he looked exactly like the Japanese version of a country singer I was familiar with.

_Very_ familiar with, in fact, because I had been translating a song of his ever since Kuwabara obsessed about the Luke Bryan sound-alike the first time he came on the radio.

"Kuwabara likes that one song of yours, um…" I waved my hands in front of me trying, to remember. "Shoot, shoot, what was it called…" I shook my head from side to side. "Ugh, I mean, what was—"

Takeru started laughing when I trailed off into silence. "You've struck another one speechless, Nobu!" he chortled. Nobu gave a helpless shrug.

"Uh…" I said, "I'm sorry, but… I can't remember your name!"

Takeru and Nobu both froze when I said that, but for the life of me, I couldn't recall Nobu's family name, nor could I recall the name of the song Kuwabara had liked so much.

"You… don't know his name?" Takeru asked in disbelief. "_Nobu_?"

"I'm, um, not from around here." I laughed nervously. "We're staying at an onsen on the edge of town, for the festival, you know, and…"

Realizing I was babbling about nothing, I shut myself down, took a deep breath, and turned to Nobu, who was looking at me with a curious expression. I told him: "I recognize your voice from the radio, and my friend really likes your music, but I'm just not too familiar with anything, so…"

Takeru and Nobu traded looks that said they didn't quite believe this was happening. I had no idea why. Was Nobu really that big of a star or something?

"Sorry, it's just that he usually gets mobbed in public," Takeru said slowly. "It's hard for him to visit his old friends, and this is… different. Most people recognize him on sight."

"Oh, don't feel bad," I said by way of comfort. "I'm from out of the country."

"Yeah, the accent…" Nobu said, but then he shook his head and smiled. "Whatever. I'm Sumizu Nobu. It's nice to meet you, and thanks for the bass." He looked at it sitting on my lap and smirked. "I've never heard anything quite like that, but… it worked, you know?"

I smiled at him. Then, however, a thought struck me. I reached into my sweatshirt's pouch and pulled out my notebook, flipping to the pages where I'd mapped out the song by Luke Bryan. I'd done the lyrics and some tablature for various instruments, enough to give him a pretty complete idea of how the song was supposed to sound, though he could polish it up as he saw fit.

"Here," I said, ripping out the pages with a flick of my wrist. "I wrote this for you."

Nobu held up his hands, keeping them away from my work. He looked regretful, but also like he'd done this before, and his words sounded rehearsed, too. "Sorry, but I couldn't—"

I didn't budge. "If you don't take this, no one ever will," I said, putting all the force I could muster into my voice. "I wrote it for _your_ voice and yours alone, so if you don't take this, it's going to sit in my notebook for forever." I jiggled the sheets so they rattled. "And hey, don't use it if you don't want to. Just knowing that you have it is enough for me, because you're the only one in the world I want to hear sing this."

Nobu and Takeru exchanged looks; I kept my gaze steady on Nobu. He had no idea how honest I was being; no one in the world was more suited for that song than he was.

_Because he's a double of someone in my world,_ I thought, and then_—Hiei! Oh my gosh, I can compare Nobu to the Luke in my world, and—and why the heck didn't I think of this sooner? Supiro Hitani could work with Britney Spears, which could prove that I would have had a double in this world, and all that crazy crap! This is awesome!_

Suddenly, it didn't matter to me much if Nobu didn't take the Luke Bryan song. I mean, I wanted him to have it because it was _his_, really and truly, but…

Luckily, though, he did take it. He reached out a hand and gently took the papers from me, tucking them under his arm with a wry smile.

"The odds of me using this are slim, of course," he said gently, "although you're really insistent about it, so I'm kind of interested despite myself. Is that weird?"

"Oh, I don't think so," I joked, and I handed the bass over to Hiei so I could stand up. "Something tells me that song might be a perfect fit."

* * *

NOTES:

**Countdown: 3**

… _countdown? What does that mean? What will happen when it reaches zero? THIS CONCERNS ME._

_Conversely, Hiei's concern with automatic doors amuses me._

_I have wanted to depict Hiei in human clothing since I started this damn thing, and I finally got my chance. UGH. Took me long enough, right? Will draw soon. Dontcha worry._

_Most of you guessed how Dani would try proving herself to Hiei, but we have yet to see if she actually did a good job of it. Hiei will tell us soon!_

_Also, Dani on a guitar. FINALLY. And the Luke Bryan/Nobu thing is more a means of proving crap to Hiei than it is anything that has real impact on the story, and I was thinking of just cutting it, but for reasons I can't give away I realized that I actually sort of need his little cameo. But don't worry, he won't pop up but for once more, and only for a little while (and I mean he'll get like 200 words and that's it). _

_Fate hasn't been very, uh, nice to my family lately. It's been one thing after another. For those who have been supportive, I can honestly say that you mean the world to me._

_Thanks again to all you lovely reader-people out there! Captain Lupin Ferus, Takara Rose Oizumi, phantomxofxmystery, colbub, Kaiya's Watergarden, Teacup Kitty, Wings of Silver Rain, Caralirani, flamingmarsh, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, nanisan1955, Eggbert 3000, AkaMizu-chan, lilmickey2008, hieisdarkdragonchick, Kai-Chan94, MusicFiend666, Silverwing013, Reiko Tsuchikake, Koryu Elric, KayTeeCee, DaAmazingMeepers, TallyYoungBlood, Katt Jeane, OhhTaylorJade, Anon, Bitches Be Crazy, Yoko Kiara14, Stellar Spirit, , Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer!_


	74. Chapter 74: Just to See You Smile

NOTE: This is Part 1 of 2 of this week's update(s). I'll be posting another chapter roughly this size tomorrow. I left half of the chapter on a computer other than my laptop; silly me!

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 74:

"Just to See You Smile"

* * *

Yusuke pulled me aside as our group—which had reconvened at the appointed place and time not long after Nobu had excused himself in the music store; I think he heard his fangirls coming—began walking out of the mall. Hiei hung back when he noticed I wasn't trailing at his side, but Yusuke waved him forward and the demon walked off with a scowl. He'd been acting sort of funny ever since I got to talking with Nobu in the music store. Something told me he didn't like me talking to people he didn't know, but since he hadn't said as much aloud, I filed his strange behavior under my mental "to ask about" list and temporarily ignored it. I'd be sure to ask him about it later, but right now…

"So, um, hey," Yusuke said. He glanced at the group—or, more specifically, at Keiko, who was helping Botan drag Ren around by her elbows despite the blonde's Japanese protests of 'Do not want, do not want,' which went largely unheard by the girls still plotting on putting Ren in a kimono later. Yusuke's eyes were soft and guarded at the same time when he looked at his ex-girlfriend; obviously something was weighing on his mind. Why else would he be talking to me?

So, in that spirit: "Need some advice?" I prompted.

He shifted on his feet, obviously a bit nervous. That was when I noticed he had a hand shoved into the pocket of his yellow windbreaker; his other hand swung loose at his side.

"Well…" Yusuke said, and then, in a rush: "Remember when we got to talking that one night before we all got drunk together and you were talking about how I couldn't keep Keiko and all that stuff and then you said that I needed to make a real commitment if I really wanted to keep her around?"

His babble had me racing to catch up. When I finally did, I said: "Uh… yes?"

Yusuke nodded in satisfaction, licking his lips to get geared up for whatever it was he was about to say.

"Well," he said at last, "I was just thinking about what you told me that Be-yon-se lady said, and—"

My eyes grew wide; I saw where he was going with this. "You _didn't_!"

"I did," he said, and he pulled his hand out of his pocket.

On his palm sat a little blue box made of velvet.

My jaw fell to the floor. Yusuke's face had never been set so determinedly in his life.

"I'm putting a ring on it!" he declared, and then his face grew less certain. "I mean, I think I am. I hope I am." He scratched the back of his neck. "_Maybe_ I am. If she lets me. Which she might not, but at least I can say I tried, right?"

I squeezed my eyes shut, hooked my cane over my elbow, and began rubbing my temples.

"Yusuke," I said patiently, "I think you should prioritize on getting Keiko _back_, before you think about getting married to her."

I heard Yusuke sigh; when my eyes opened he was staring at the ring box as though someone had just kicked a puppy in his line of sight.

"I thought you might say that," he said slowly. Our eyes met; however, even though I had just told him that he'd made a mistake, he didn't look at all perturbed by my words. "I'm not taking this back to the store, though. I heard her tell Botan she loved it." He held the box up and grinned at it. "Even if she won't marry me, it'll at least make her smile!"

The idea that Yusuke had bought something for Keiko just to see her smile had me letting out a whimper in reaction to the utter cuteness of the situation. Yusuke looked a little startled by it, so I clapped a hand over my mouth and tried to cover the sound with a cough.

"Uh, well, that's certainly nice of you," I said lamely. "I'd hold off on giving it to her until you're back together, but if you just want her to have it, then don't make a big deal out of giving it to her. You don't want her feeling like she owes you and stuff."

"I get that, yeah," Yusuke said. He nodded resolutely, but to me he still looked somewhat uncertain so I patted him gently on the shoulder and gave him an encouraging smile.

"There will be plenty of opportunities to get in her good graces during the festival," I assured him. "Maybe there will be a perfect chance to give it to her, then."

"I bet you're right," he said after a moment. This time, _he_ patted _me_ on the back. "Thanks, Dan."

"Don't mention it."

He ruffled my hair; I batted his hand away, making him laugh when I scowled.

"You really do look like a little kid," he joked. "Let's catch up to the others. I don't want them knowing I'm planning something!"

"That'd probably be for the best," I agreed, and we started off. The group had hung back to wait for us by the doors, and when we approached Kuwabara called out that we were slowpokes. Yusuke put him in a headlock on principle; we entered the parking lot with the two of them play-fighting like there was no tomorrow.

Keiko, I noticed, watched Yusuke without a word, and with the tiniest of frowns on her face.

* * *

"Why did you leave me with them?" she said, looking both piteous and exhausted at once. "Why, Dani, _why_?"

Ren, Yukina, Keiko, Botan and I were unpacking our clothes. Ren had seemed fidgety and the other girls had been giggling at some private joke I wasn't a part of, but I just watched them giggle without a word as we piled back into the vans and drove to the very edge of Sakana. Large, lush grounds surrounded a building constructed in the traditional Japanese style; this was the onsen at which we were staying, and after being shown to our rooms (one big suite for the boys and another for the girls) we began sorting our clothes into different trunks provided by the establishment. Botan, Keiko, and Yukina were all chatting about random stuff while they filled their boxes; Ren sidled up to me and, after shooting a glance at the others to make sure they were distracted, began addressing me in fervent English.

"They were shovin' me into dresses, Dani—dresses!" she said, eyeing me out of the corner of one blue eye while she rolled a t-shirt and put it in her trunk. "It took me ages to work out how to say the word 'pants', and when I finally did they started bringin' me ones with glitter on the ass! Glitter! Can you believe it?"

"You practiced your Japanese, didn't you?" I said as I folded a pair of jeans.

"Well, yeah, but—" She paused, looking at the jeans in my arms, and then she peered into my box with a frown. Then she grabbed the jeans from me. "Dani, rollin' clothes conserves space," she scolded. "C'mon! That's basic physics!"

I snatched back the pants and pointedly folded them before tossing them in the box, much to her displeasure.

"Ren, we live here now," I said sternly. I planted my fists on my hips. "You can't rely on me to translate for you for the rest of your life!"

"I know that," she said, sighing. "It's just, you know, you _know_ me. They don't. You coulda at least came along and—"

"And I can't hold your hand forever," I said. I put my last piece of clothing into my trunk and shut the lid. "When I first came here I didn't know much Japanese either, but now I speak it fluently, and you know how I did that? Through total immersion, that's how."

Ren started to say something, but then she closed her mouth and looked somewhat troubled. Even though her clothes lay scattered on the floor, she shut her trunk and sat on it, putting her chin in her hand so she could stroke her lips with her fingers. She often did that when she was thinking.

"You didn't have anybody at all, did you?" she said after a few seconds. Her eyes had gone thoughtful. "Huh. I hadn't thought about that."

"Yeah, well, it's fine," I said. I shooed her off the trunk and opened it again. "Finish unpacking."

She went to the task without complaint. I stood over her, not knowing what to do with myself, but then Botan called my name. I turned to her; she, Keiko, and Yukina were all looking at me.

"What are the two of you talking about?" Keiko inquired.

I felt my lips quirk. "Oh, Ren was just telling me how hard it was to shop when she can't speak the language," I said, shrugging. "She complained about me not going along to translate for her, but I didn't have anyone to translate for me when I first got here, so I won the argument, I guess."

Keiko said 'oh' and nodded sagely. Botan giggled behind her hand.

"You speak Japanese very well, for a foreigner," Yukina complimented.

"Although your accent is sometimes hard to understand," Botan cut in. "It's not a bad accent, of course, Ren's is much worse after all, but—"

Keiko shot Botan a glare that clearly said Botan had almost insulted me, and that Keiko was about to bite her head off for doing so (if there's one thing Keiko won't stand for, it's needless insults). The reaper swallowed, chuckled nervously as she eyed Keiko up and down, and then she looked back in my direction.

"Well, what I mean to say is that you speak Japanese very well, just like Yukina said!" she covered. "Yes, just like Yukina said! Ah ha ha!"

I didn't say anything, choosing to just look at the girls as they turned away and started chatting about what they would wear to the festival later that night in what was obviously a very blunt change of subject on Botan's part. My stomach turned a discontented flip-flop. Botan had brought up my American accent, and now that I thought about it, both Nobu _and_ his friend Takeru had mentioned it when I met them at the music store. No one had brought it up before that day, so I guess I had just assumed I didn't have much of an accent, if any at all, but now… was I not speaking Japanese as well as I thought? Botan had mentioned I was hard to understand…

Just then one of the hotel's managers knocked on our door and offered to escort us to dinner. The manager was an imposing woman in full kimono; she looked very prim and proper as she led us with her tiny, kimono-bound steps to a tearoom with a low, long table laden with traditional Japanese cuisine. The boys were already seated, as was Genkai, so I picked a spot next to Hiei and Ren sat on my other side to eat.

If I had thought seeing Hiei in human clothes was weird, imagine my surprise to see him sitting at the table with the rest of us, still wearing his dark jeans and black shirt, chopsticks in one hand and a bowl of rice in the other. I was still fascinated by the sight of him eating; you never really saw him do it in the anime, so I kept one eye on him and one eye on Ren all during the meal. Ren had finally managed to hold her chopsticks correctly, though she still had trouble eating her rice without spilling it all over the place. I occasionally had to help her reposition the sticks in her fingers (for all her love of physics she was quite clumsy sometimes) but for the most part I entertained myself by studying Hiei in what I hoped was a sneaky fashion.

Halfway through that dinner, however, I learned that I am not a ninja.

"You're staring at me," Hiei said in a low voice.

My face heated up; I'd zoned out while looking at him and quickly covered my embarrassment by shoving a piece of sushi in my mouth. It proved to be too big for me to swallow, however, so I started to choke and had to gulp down some water to dislodge the fish. Ren began pounding me on the back while I coughed and massaged my aching throat.

"Hmph. Idiot," Hiei said under his breath, but in his words I detected more fondness than I did irritation. So, I just stuck my tongue out at him. It seemed like a fair trade.

The rest of the dinner passed without much incident, although I did learn a few things about the place we were staying. It seemed that the owner owed Genkai a favor, so they were letting us stay for free despite the place being so very, very nice. A trio of girls in kimono even followed me and the other girls back to our room, offering to help us get into our kimono so we could go to the festival in proper style!

"That would be lovely, thank you," Keiko told them as she let them into our suite. I was sitting atop my trunk when this took place; the human girl shot me a wink. "Botan and Yukina are very good at wrapping kimono, but sometimes this is just too much fun to pass up!"

I watched Keiko, Botan, and Yukina get dressed up with plenty of giggling, oohs, and ahs. They looked very pretty in their outfits; Botan wore pink, of course, with silvery cranes all up and down the hem, and Yukina put on a deep purple kimono with red bamboo pattern. Keiko looked gorgeous in a brown kimono with copper and pink _sakura_ branches, and all three of them had their hair put up in pretty clips by the girls working at the onsen.

"This place sure has some weird customs," Ren muttered. She, like me, watched the others get dressed on the sidelines. "Those are comfy, yeah, but they're hard to walk in."

I shot her a curious look. "You tried one on?"

"They made me _get one_, actually," she said, not looking even the slightest bit pleased. She stood up to get into her trunk, and from it she pulled a flat white box—one of the ones I'd seen people carrying in the mall. Ren looked almost frightened when she asked: "Do you think I'll have to wear it tonight?"

My mouth had fallen open; I snapped my teeth shut with a clicking sound. I didn't have a kimono; was I the only one who would be going to the festival in plainclothes?

One of the kimono girls chose that moment to take Ren by the arm and lead her away. Ren mouthed 'help me' over her shoulder, but I just smiled and let her get abducted. Call me a vindictive bitch, but I felt left out. _Really_ left out. Here I was, a part of the group just like everyone else, but did I get included? Uh, no, I did _not_.

Suppressing a grumble, I eyed Keiko and the others as they praised one another's hairstyles, then turned and opened my trunk. I dressed myself in a nice top and tailored jeans, hoping to at least look good even if I didn't fit in—

"Dani, what are you doing?"

Keiko had come up behind me while I dressed myself. I straightened and turned to her, pasting on a happy smile that I didn't actually feel.

"Just getting ready," I told her. "You look great!"

She seemed a little concerned when she looked me up and down. "But why are you wearing _that_?" she asked.

"…because I don't have a kimono?" I said.

Her brow knit. "You mean she didn't tell you?"

I pulled back a bit in confusion. "Who didn't tell me what?"

Something seemed to click in her eyes, because they rolled in exasperation before Keiko heaved a sigh and barked: "Botan!"

"Hm?" the reaper said from her spot behind Yukina (she'd been playing with the apparition's hair).

"I thought you said you were going to tell Dani about her kimono!"

"I am!" Botan happily said—and then she went pale. She promptly turned on her heel and marched as stiff as a wooden soldier over to her trunk, from which she pulled a familiar white container. She held it out to Keiko the way a kid hands in late homework to a particularly strict teacher.

"Eh heh heh," Botan laughed nervously. "I, um, forgot?"

I watched in disbelief as Botan handed the box to one of the onsen girls, who in turn took me by the elbow and started to lead me away. I pulled out of her grasp, however, so I could look between Keiko, Yukina, and Botan in disbelief.

"You… got me a kimono?" I said slowly.

The three exchanged glances. They all looked slightly confused, but then, one by one, they each seemed to reach some sort of conclusion that made them smile small, secretive little smiles.

"Of course we did, Dani-san," Yukina said when their stares broke. "You can't go to your first festival without wearing a kimono. Kazuma-san taught me that."

My bad temper from feeling left out evaporated in a millisecond, and to my horror I felt my throat thicken with emotion. To think they had gone to all the trouble of getting me—and I had been so ungrateful and mean—

"Thank you," I said, choking out the words as best I could. "You guys… that was…"

"Oh, stop it, stop it," Botan said, waving her hands in pert dismissal. "It was nothing, really, just a small thing to welcome you into our world, that's all!"

"But—" I said, because I truly was grateful to them for making me feel so welcome and I wanted them to know it, but Keiko came forward and pulled me into a brief hug. Her kimono smelled of freesia and a spice I couldn't name.

"We wanted to do it," Keiko said into my hair. She pushed me to arm's length with a smile. "Now go get prettied. I'm sure there's a certain demo—" She paused and glanced at the human onsen girls before amending: "I mean, I'm sure there's a certain boy who'd like seeing you all dressed up."

I swallowed down my thanks and nodded, at last allowing myself to be led to the room where I'd be wrapped in my kimono. It wasn't until halfway through getting dressed that I remembered how the Japanese don't give gifts lightly, and when I did remember that, I felt grateful all the more.

* * *

I'm fairly certain Yukina picked my kimono, although she never admitted it to me. It's just that I can't see Botan picking something as subtle as a black kimono with violet flowers and shamisens on the hem, and Keiko I'm sure would have picked something pink if she could, so the whole thing smacked of Yukina's refined hand. They had even picked out a comb for my hair, a gold one with violet enamel on it, and I truly did feel pretty after the girls dressed me up, did my hair, and applied light makeup to my cheeks, eyes, and lips. It was rare for me to wear anything much more drastic than eyeliner, though, so I didn't know if I liked the me I saw in the mirror when I took a look at the paint on my face.

The girls all seemed to like it, though. They told me I looked pretty, and each of them seemed to glow with confidence in their dressy outfits. Ren—in her plain forest green kimono, which had to be picked from the men's section due to her broad shoulders—was the only one of us with any sort of complaint. She wiped off the makeup we forced her to wear and her hair wasn't long enough for any sort of styling, so all in all she pretty much looked like a boy. She enjoyed looking androgynous, however, so that wasn't what she complained about. She complained about her shoes.

Since it was winter, we had to wear thick socks with separated toes inside our sandals. Ren complained about having to take tiny steps in her cumbersome footwear, footwear I managed to weasel my way out of wearing thanks to my bad leg. I got away with wearing plain black tennis shoes, although Botan about had a heart attack when she saw me defiling my kimono with them, but it wasn't like I had a choice! The socks were simply not made for feet like mine, nor were the traditional sandals. Tennis shoes were all I could handle.

At any rate, I managed to talk Ren into wearing the shoes, and having averted that crisis we all went out to the onsen's lobby to meet up with the guys in high spirits.

I didn't expect Hiei to be wearing a kimono, and I wasn't disappointed. He was still in his outfit from earlier, as were all of the other boys. Genkai was in her normal garb as well; in my mind it had become abundantly clear that only we girls had even entertained the thought of dressing up, and my feeling-left-out-ness from earlier seemed even sillier in retrospect. I would have fit in with the guys just fine even if the girls _hadn't_ been so nice to me.

Genkai raised an eyebrow when we came into view, shooting us all looks that said she hadn't expected us to dress up. Kuwabara began gushing over a cold Yukina as soon as he laid eyes on her, and Yusuke…

"You… look really nice," he told Keiko, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck while he said it.

"Thank you," she said stiffly. "You… you do too."

I couldn't help but put a hand over my mouth to hide a laugh, even though the situation was totally serious. Keiko looked like a fish out of water, being distant with Yusuke when he was actually _complimenting_ _her_ for once. Surely it was a momentous occasion; surely Keiko was having a hard time holding back from loving him again, wasn't she?

She certainly looked it just then. She gazed up into Yusuke's uncertain face as though thinking about maybe saying something kind, something to give him hope, maybe—

But, it was not to be. She ducked her head and turned away from him, seeking out Botan, who was talking to Kurama by the door.

"Ouch," Ren muttered in my ear. She didn't need to know Japanese to know what just happened. "Howdy, rejection."

I gave her a sad smile, and I would have gone on to explain what had happened had Hiei not picked that moment to approach me. I shrank back a bit, unnerved by the intensity of his expression (not to mention the predatory nature of his stalk of a walk), but he stopped a few feet away… and said nothing. I waited, watching him watch me for a moment, and then Ren spoke.

"Does he… want something?" she muttered in my ear.

"I think so," I said back, and then to Hiei: "Um, hello."

His eyes passed up and down my body in a fluid sweep. I felt myself begin to blush even though Hiei hadn't done much at all, and then I realized that he was staring at my lips and I felt my cheeks grow even hotter.

"What's on your mouth?" he said loudly.

Around us, conversation ground to a surprised halt. Everyone turned to stare. Kurama in particular glared at the back of Hiei's head as though trying to communicate with the fire demon through telepathy, which for all I know he was, but that's not the point: Kurama looked like he desperately wanted to intervene in whatever was coming my way. Not that I knew what that 'whatever' was, of course.

"Uh… lipgloss?" I said slowly.

Hiei's eyebrows knit together. "I don't like it," he said.

I gaped at him. His expression did not falter.

"Hiei!" Botan said. She stalked over and leaned over his shoulder, frowning right into his face. "Dani looks very nice tonight! You shouldn't say such things!"

"But her lips are all _shiny_!" he spat. "It's not natural!"

No one spoke. Botan pulled back, blinking at him. Kurama winced and put a hand to his face.

I started to laugh.

It started as a chuckle. I tried to hold it in, really I did, but it made my chest start to hitch and then it came pouring out, making me double over and plant my hands on my knee and cane to keep from falling over, because the image in my _head_—!

The look on Hiei's _face_—!

'It's not _natural'_—!

"Uh, are you OK?" Ren asked uncertainly, but I waved her off. Slowly, and under the freaked out gazes of all my friends, I managed to quiet my laughter and stand up straight.

"Just… just roll with it, guys, it's totally fine," I said, unable to help letting out a final chortle, and I walked out of the onsen's front doors and into the chilly night.

The comment had been so perfectly _Hiei_ that I couldn't find it in myself to take offense.

* * *

Botan wasn't completely honest with me when she described what we'd be doing that night. I mean, she told me nothing but the truth, but she also left out a healthy chunk of it that I did not exactly appreciate being left unsaid.

When I say that I have 'two left' feet, I mean it. But that will come into play later.

"There will be booths with games, food, fortune telling, crafts, all sorts of things," she had explained as I drove our van to the nearby festival sight (which was located by a Shinto shrine in the middle of Sakana on the side of a steep hill carved through with stair steps). "There will be music, too, and lots of people. I'm sure you'll enjoy it!"

We parked at the foot of the hill in a parking lot with many other cars. The steps cut straight into the hillside, rising above us in a gentle slope, and on either side of the twenty-meter-wide staircase stood the booths. There were tons of them, big ones and small ones all holding different activities and shops and all sorts of cool stuff. Red Shinto arches overshadowed the stairs every ten meters or so; someone had strung ropes between them and hung paper lanterns all over the place, lighting the night up with floating blobs of bright colors and warmth that belied how cold the night was (I could see my breath when I exhaled). It looked like something out of a fairytale, to tell the truth. The stars overhead were bright, the people smiling, the clothes colorful and exotic… the shrine perched at the top of the steps seemed like a mythical castle just waiting to be explored, too, and the minute I saw it I knew I wanted to go inside.

However, between it and I were the stairs. I eyed them with trepidation. Although there weren't nearly as many stairs at this temple as there were at Genkai's, stairs are still my worst enemy—well, second-worst enemy, but I'm getting to that. As soon as I saw the stairs and the fact that the festival's entertainment, AKA the booths, were lining them, I came up with a plan of attack. In my head I pictured myself slowly making my way up the steps, visiting the booths one by one in order to rest between stairs, and if I only spent a few minutes at each booth…

"I'll need at least an hour, maybe more," I said to myself, but then I felt a hand on my arm. I looked up into Kuwabara's face, and to my surprise, he looked… worried?

"We're not going that way, Dani!" he said fervently. He jerked a thumb over his shoulder, away from the booths and the temple toward the other side of the parking lot—which, I noticed, had quite a large crowd gathered around what appeared to be a path leading down another sloping hill. "We're going over there!"

"What for?" I asked.

"The concert!" Kuwabara said. He tugged on my sleeve; the others had already wandered toward the other path. "C'mon, c'mon, we're going to be late!"

I followed in a bit of a daze, looking over my shoulder at the booths with longing. They seemed so fun, so Japanese-y, and the culture here was so cool… but then again, Kuwabara seemed quite excited as he tugged me into the crowd and down a set of long stone stairs, stairs which wound down through a Japanese-style terrace garden and onto a flat grassy plain. The climb had taken nearly five solid minutes at my slow pace, and I was so exhausted at the end of it that I had to stop and sit on a small statue of a Tanuki at the bottom of the stairs to catch my breath.

"You… go on!" I told Kuwabara as he anxiously hovered over me. "I'll… catch up."

He scampered off without any further prompting. I concentrated on breathing (it was really hard to do that since the air in my lungs was cold, even despite the warmth of my multi-layered kimono), and when I felt I could draw breath without bursting into a coughing fit, I raised my head to take a look around.

As a result, my eyes very nearly bugged out of my skull.

Before me lay a grassy field, in the center of which stood a pavilion. It had been constructed of metal rods and covered with airy white fabric, making it seem like a cloud had descended to earth and stayed there. Lights and lanterns had been strung up on poles all over the place, like stars someone had caught and corralled for our viewing pleasure, and the effect was so magical that I couldn't help but just stare at it in momentary awe.

"Humans have an eye for beauty, if nothing else."

I flinched, but it was only Hiei. He stood with his hands in his pockets, staring at the pavilion through impassive scarlet eyes. I hadn't heard him come up behind me, but I noticed that I felt less chilly all of a sudden. The heat of him was apparent even when we weren't in Demon World, it seemed.

"It's very pretty," I said by way of agreement. I stood up, getting my white cane under me with a grunt. "We should go find the others."

"Wait."

I turned. Hiei was looking at me, face screwed up in concentration.

"I didn't mean," he said, and he stopped when I held up a hand.

"If this is about the lipgloss, you don't have to say anything," I said. "I don't like makeup much, either."

For a moment he looked taken aback. Then, however, his face morphed into a smirk.

"Yeah, yeah, don't look so pleased with yourself," I said. He hid the smirk in a scowl. I turned my back on him and began walking toward the pavilion. "Let's go."

"Dani."

I sighed, preparing to once again stop walking—

"You look… pretty."

—but his words stopped me. Slowly, I looked over my shoulder.

"I can… see your face better with your hair like this," he said, gesturing at the bun on the nape of my neck. "With your neck showing, it makes you less… plain."

Although he was trying quite valiantly to compliment me, I don't think he realized he had just given me a bit of an insult in the mix. Still, I think my displeasure showed on my face because he very quickly looked horrified (for Hiei, anyway) and took a step toward me, holding up a hand as if to keep me from running away. I decided to throw the poor guy a bone at that point; he was trying pretty dang hard by my estimates.

"You're not very good at sweet talking people, are you, Hiei?" I joked, and his worried look faded. "It's OK, I'm not, either." That time I managed to turn away from him without mishap—other than my rapidly beating heart, of course. "Let's just go find the others."

I felt him following behind me. His warmth is hard to miss.

* * *

NOTES:

_THIS IS PART ONE OF THIS WEEK'S CHAPTER. Part Two will be coming tomorrow, because I'm an idiot and left half of the chapter on my work computer instead of my laptop. UGH. _

_ As far as the countdown goes, this is, like, 2-and-a-half. Part Two will be the real '2' in the countdown of DOOM, and mystery. _

_Anyone notice what jacket Yusuke was wearing in the beginning of this chapter?_

_ Anyone remember what jacket Hina finds in my YusukexOC story, "Touched?"_

_ Yeah. So. Crossover goodness abounds._

_And all the talk about Dani's accent is important, I swear. You'll see when I update tomorrow, during Dan's talk with Hiei... OH HO HO._

_Many thanks to last week's readers! Lilmickey2008, j.d.y., Wings of Silver Rain, Kajihenge Yoko, phantomxofxmystery, Somebody Standing There, Caralirani, colbub, Reiko Tsuchikake, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Kaiya's Watergarden, Anon, OhhTaylorJade, Captain Lupus Ferus, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, DaAmazingMeepers, Angel of Randomosity, Eggbert 3000, AkaMizu-chan, etowa-ru, TeacupKitty, chocolateluvr13, flamingmarsh, KayTeeCee, yonet-chan, ephemeral violet, nevvy, Snowgirl7589, Yoko Kiara14, Tally Youngblood, Willowleaf 2560, Katt Jeane, Koryu Elric, How Could This Happen To Me!_


	75. Chapter 75: Liar

… 2 …

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 75:

"Liar"

* * *

Circular tables ringed the edges of the pavilion and spilled out onto the surrounding lawn. Some people had brought blankets and had spread them out on the grass, but luckily for us we had somehow managed to snag a table near the dance floor—because yeah, in the center of the pavilion, in front of a raised platform covered in DJ equipment and actual live-performance instruments, there was a dance floor.

I mentioned earlier that stairs are my second-worst-enemy, and I've said time and again just how much I hate them. So, how much do you think I hate dancing, which is Supreme Enemy Number One? A lot, that's how much. I simply do not have the balance necessary to do any sort of 'breaking it down', and 'fancy footwork'? You might as well try to teach an elephant to jump.

"Oh _no_," I said when I spotted the dance floor through a gap in the people milling about. "Oh dear sweet Jesus, _no_!"

Hiei, at my side, raised one thin eyebrow in unspoken inquiry. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried not to let intense feelings of dread show on my face.

"I really, _really_ don't like to dance," I said through grit teeth. I blindly pointed at where I knew the dance floor and DJ station lay. "_That_ is freaking me out just a bit."

"No one can make you dance if you don't want to," Hiei said.

My eye would have twitched had it not been shut tight. I said: "You've obviously never been on the receiving end of Botan's kitty face, Hiei!"

I opened my eyes when someone called my name, and then Hiei's. Yusuke appeared, doggedly trotting over to us, ducking through the crowd standing around the tables and dance floor. There were probably a hundred or so people surrounding and inside the pavilion; it was a big crowd, by my piddling standards. I didn't like going out in crowds all that often. My feet got stepped on and I tended to get swept away in the crush of people, unable to fight against the throng's natural ebb and flow.

"We got us a table; c'mon, this way," Yusuke said. He put a hand between my shoulder blades to gently point me in the right direction. "It's in a great spot, we can totally see the stage."

"Perfect," I said sullenly. "Friggin' perfect."

The large circular tables were plenty big enough to sit all nine members of our group. I took an open spot next to Ren; Hiei, of course, sat on my other side. Keiko and Yukina sat between Ren and Botan as though protecting themselves from their unwanted admirers with semi-human shields, but Yukina really had no reason to worry—Kuwabara had sat the chair closest to the stage, which was only a few feet away, and he was turned backward in his seat so he could stare at the stage as though doing so would make people magically appear on it.

"What's up with him?" I asked Yusuke when I sat down. I pointed a finger at Kuwabara. "He's been jumpy since we got here."

Yusuke, from his spot on Hiei's other side, leaned behind the fire apparition to look at me and say: "He's a big fan of the guest artist tonight."

"Who, the DJ?"

"No, the singer. There's gonna be live music first, and then the DJ will come on."

While I digested this (no wonder Kuwabara had been so antsy to get here earlier!) Yusuke leaned to his right and grabbed Kurama's arm. Patient, affectionate annoyance flashed across the redhead's face when Yusuke shoved his sleeve off of his wrist, staring at Kurama's expensive-looking watch with his eyes screwed up. About thirty seconds later, however—

"Uh, can you actually tell time on this thing?" he asked, looking up at Kurama with an innocent expression.

"Yes, Yusuke, I can," Kurama said. He rolled his eyes, but a smile threatened to curl the corners of his lips. "The act should start in twenty minutes or so."

Genkai, sandwiched between Kurama and Kuwabara, let out a malcontented 'humph'. "Dimwit," she shot, and Yusuke flipped her off.

"Shut it, hag," he said, but he changed his tune to subservient when she leaned across Kurama and smacked her ex-pupil on the head. "Ow, ow, OK, I give!"

I had a clear view of the stage from my seat—when Kuwabara wasn't popping up and down in like a Mexican jumping bean and blocking my view with his head, of course—and since I was the only person other than Hiei who wasn't busy doing other things (Ren was practicing her Japanese on Keiko, who was teaching her with gusto; Yukina and Botan were chatting; Kuwabara was acting like a hyper schoolboy; Kurama and Genkai were talking with Yusuke about the merits of learning how to tell time) I think I was the first to notice that people were taking to the stage. I mean, Kuwabara squealed like a schoolgirl the second after I spotted them so I can't really know who was first to notice, but that doesn't matter because I can very clearly say that I was the only one of us to actually _recognize_ the person unobtrusively fiddling with the bass drum's kicker.

"I'll be back in a minute," I muttered to Hiei as I stood up. He looked a little unhappy when I gestured for him not to follow, but he respected my wishes and let me approach the stage on my own. It was tall enough to reach my eye level; I had to stand on my good foot's toes and grip the edge of the stage to see above it, and when I did I called: "Hey, Takeru!"

The bald man with the goatee jumped, startled, but then he spotted me and his eyes widened. I lifted my hand above the stage's edge and waved at him, but rather than greet me in return he shoved a hand into the pocket of his studded jeans and pulled out… a cell phone?

Takeru held up a finger that clearly told me to 'wait one second' as he held the phone to his ear after jabbing a few buttons with his thumb. I watched, unsure of what to do, as he waited for whoever it was he was calling to pick up, and then—

"Hey, come back _right now_, dude," Takeru said. He spared no time for an introduction, waiting about half a second before adding: "Like, _now_, now!"

Takeru fell silent for a second; someone was obviously asking him a question. Then he answered: "Because she's standing right in front of me, that's why!"

My stomach flipped unpleasantly. What the heck? Had someone been looking for me? Why in the world was someone—

I nearly screamed when I felt a hand touch my waist through the fabric of my _obi_, but it was only Hiei. He looked worried, insofar as Hiei ever looks worried, I mean, and I put a hand to my heart as I staggered back and leaned on the stage for support. My pulse beat wild in my chest.

"I felt your fear," Hiei said, looking me up and down as if searching for injuries. "What happened?"

It took me a minute to remember the mark on my neck, but when I did his explanation made more sense. I opened my mouth to answer, but then I heard Takeru say "bye" from somewhere above and behind me. I turned my back on Hiei and peered over the stage, only to jump back a bit when Takeru's head poked over the side. He had crawled on hands and knees to the stage's lip, but when I moved better see him he swung his legs over and hopped onto the ground with me and Hiei. I think his combat boots had metal in them somewhere because he clinked a lot when he walked, and without the tall shoes he would be a little shorter than Yusuke, by my estimates. His shoulders were more broad, though.

"Hey, Dani!" he said, voice touched with a hint of nerves. His dark brown eyes were happy, pleased with himself, but also a bit… was that apprehension I saw in there? "Fancy meeting you here!"

"Uh, sure. Were you… looking for me?" I asked, not sure how blunt I was supposed to be but opting for honesty over tact regardless. "Because that phone call was a bit suspicious and my boyfriend's standing right behind me, so kidnapping is out of the question."

I felt Hiei shift behind me when I called him my boyfriend; I hoped he was happy and not mad that I'd used that word (which barely even began to fit the complexity of our relationship), but I pushed my worries to the side in favor of focusing on Takeru.

Takeru's friendly smile crumpled into a look of intense relief. He passed a hand over his bald head; I saw tattoos ripple at the neck of his black t-shirt and the cuffs of his long sleeves.

"We're not kidnapping you, no way no how," he said, laughing a little. "It's just, well—Nobu _loves_ that song you wrote!"

My chest immediately became suffused in the warmth pride. "I'm so glad!" I said, clapping my hands together with glee. "I mean, I had hoped he would and stuff, but to think he actually—"

"He wants to play it tonight," Takeru cut in.

I blinked at him. "He what?"

"He wants to play it tonight," Takeru repeated. He waved a hand at the stage behind him. "He's the guest artist. You knew that, right?"

Kuwabara's behavior suddenly made a whole lot more sense. He was going to get to see his favorite artist play in a tiny, intimate setting; _oh wow, if I got to see the Red Hot Chili Peppers this up close and personal, I'd act the exact same way,_ I thought.

"Normally he doesn't play such small venues, but this is his home town and he owed me a favor, so he swung it for us," Takeru was saying. I snapped back to paying attention. "But yeah, he wants to play your song!"

"But I only just gave it to him this afternoon!" I said by way of protest. "Did he really learn all of it in less than a day?"

"That's the funny thing," Takeru said. "The song clicked with him. The minute he tried playing it, it was like his hands already knew what to do. It was the weirdest shit _ever_!" He let out another booming laugh and clapped me on the shoulder. "His band's good, too, so we picked it up real quick and practiced all afternoon. I think we're ready to play it live—but there's only one problem."

"Which is?" I asked.

"We don't have a guitarist."

I froze. Takeru started grinning.

"The song calls for a mandolin," he said (_I guess that what's they're using instead of a banjo_, I thought), "_and_ a guitar. Now, normally Nobu plays his own guitar, but he's the only one of us who has the chops for a mandolin, so we're short one instrument and there's a pretty rockin' solo halfway before the final bridge and chorus." He crossed his arms over his chest and grinned happily. "We were gonna have to find some random-ass player to fill in just for that song, but then I had the bright idea to go find _you_! Smart, ain't I?"

"Sure," I said—and then I realized what he was getting at. "Wait," I said, "you mean you want _me_ to play with you guys? Tonight? Like, _now_?"

His eyes went a little wider with worry. "Yeah. You _do_ know how to play electric guitar, right?"

My musician's pride made me say: "I, yeah, I mean, I love to play, but—"

"Well, great!" Takeru said. He clapped my shoulder so hard my arm buckled atop my cane and almost sent me to the floor. "I'm already having to take off the drums to play the fiddle since I'm the only one of us who can front that, so this is—" Words failed him and he patted me again. "You saved us, really, thanks for that!"

"Uh," I said, fully meaning to protest—I mean, I was sure I could play the part, I'd done it before and I knew I could do it again, but—this was so sudden—

"There's a guitar up on the stage for you," Takeru was saying. "It'll be tuned since Nobu'll be using it for the first part of our song set, but you might want to get familiar with it."

"Uh huh," I said, feeling a little hollow.

Takeru glanced at his watch. "Well, Nobu will be here soon so we can start. We're not gonna unveil your song 'til the end, so just enjoy the show and we'll call you up when it's time." He pointed over his shoulder at the stage. "I gotta finish setting up. Catch you in a few!"

I watched him clamber back up onto the stage in something of a daze. Then, Hiei walked to my side and scowled at me.

"Are you going to do it?" he asked.

I blame my shock for my ineloquent response of: "Do what?"

His eyes narrowed in annoyance. "Play with them!"

"Uh—I think so," I said… and as soon as I said it the fact that I was going to play in front of everyone sank in. Confidence—the kind I'd developed in my music only after years of practice—gave me new conviction. "Yeah," I said, resolute. "Yes, I am."

"Why?" Hiei wanted to know.

"Because they asked me to," I said. To me, that reasoning was simple, logical… it was the only reason I needed.

To Hiei, however, it did not seem to cut the mustard.

"Why?" he asked. "Why would you do this for them? You hardly know them!"

I had no response to that. Hiei's fists were balled up at his sides; he'd shed his leather jacket so I could see the tension coiled in his bare forearms, even in the one that was wound tight with bandages to keep the Black Dragon at bay. He looked angry, for some reason—but, he also looked hurt, and for the life of me I couldn't figure out why!

"We're musicians, Hiei," I said at last. "This is just what we _do_."

I don't know why Hiei has the bad luck of being interrupted at every turn, but he does. He opened his mouth to speak just as Kuwabara skidded to a halt beside us, black eyes wild and cheeks flushed.

"Dani, do you know that guy?" the psychic demanded as he pointed at Takeru, who was still checking instruments on stage.

"Uh… yeah," I said. "Met him at the mall today. We jammed together."

"Is he in the band?" Kuwabara asked.

"The drummer, yeah," I said.

Kuwabara's eyes got wide at that—very wide. "Think he could get me Nobu's autograph?" he asked in a hushed whisper, as if the thought was almost too precious to voice aloud.

"Probably," I said—and then I thought about it and realized something. "Actually, yeah, I can get one for you no problem," I said, reaching out to pat the big guy on the shoulder.

He promptly let out the scream of a preteen fangirl. "!" Kuwabara squealed as he pulled me into a crushing hug and started to flail around with joy.

When he finally let me go, I was out of breath. "You're welcome!" I gasped as he skipped back to the table. I looked at Hiei, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear nervously. "Um… want to sit down?"

Though disgruntled, he nodded, and together we went back to the table. Ren accosted me with questions about Takeru the second I settled into my chair—how do you know him, where did you meet him, is he a nice boy, all sorts of stuff like that.

"He's just a friend I jammed with today in a music store," I explained, and since Ren was well versed in how easily connected I became with people through music, she accepted this with a relieved smiled.

"Oh, that's nice," she said. "But, there's somethin' I've been meanin' t' ask ya."

"What is it?"

"How do you say, 'Isn't my girlfriend pretty?' in this crazy language?"

I blinked at her. She blinked back, as innocent as a lamb. Slowly I translated her selected phrase; more quickly, she repeated it back.

"What did you want to know that for?" I suspiciously asked her.

She sat back in her chair with a smirk. "Just want to know how t' defend ya if you get hit on, is all," she said.

My eyes rolled on reflex. "Ha ha, like that'll happen," I said. Ren often pretended to be a boy if it looked like I was getting at all inconvenienced—not that it happens often, mind you, but Ren is pretty freaking tall so if I ever get picked on (in a hitting-on-you kind of way or in a your-foot-is-weird kind of way), she's my best bet for defense, and who would ever want to piss off someone's Ren-tall boyfriend?

"So you know the band, Dani?" Botan asked from across the table. Everyone had been talking amongst themselves in low voices, but when Botan said that almost everyone at the table looked my way.

"Oh, um… sort of," I said, a little unnerved at being in the spotlight. "Takeru's the drummer."

"What were the two of you talking about?" she wanted to know. Her head had tilted to one side with curiosity. "He seemed quite happy to see you!"

"Oh, yeah, we were just catching up," I hedged, not wanting to tell them I was going to be playing in just a little while (it had hardly even suck in for me yet, so I didn't need to be spreading it). "I met him today. He's nice."

"Oh."

Although the grim reaper seemed to want to ask more questions, Yukina distracted her and I was let off the hook—and I was further let off the hook when someone cleared their throat over the speaker system rigged throughout the pavilion.

"Ohmygodit'sstarting!" Kuwabara screeched in a rush, and we all turned toward the stage just as the lights dimmed.

Takeru stood at the mic. Grinning from ear to ear, the man held out his hands in welcome as people began standing up and wandering toward the stage, forming a crowd on the dance floor in front of it. Kuwabara shot out of his chair and dove in, struggling to swim against the current and get as close as humanly possible to the musicians, who had appeared behind Takeru and taken places with their instruments in hand.

"Hey, y'all," Takeru said. He waved to the crowd, which cheered. "I'm not gonna talk too much because I know y'all wanna see us play, but I just wanted to thank everyone involved in this year's festival for giving us a bit of stage-time. We're Evermore, and tonight we have a special guest—Sumizu Nobu!"

Nobu seemed to pop out of nowhere, looking handsome and modest in his jeans, boots, and vest as he approached the mic, guitar in hand, smile on his face. Takeru hopped behind the drum kit and struck up a beat; the other instruments came in as one, and after an eight count Nobu began to sing.

I watched the band, tapping my foot in time to the song that, in my opinion, needed something I couldn't name. Nobu sounded just like Luke Bryan, only maybe a bit more experienced, and the players backing him up were all veterans, I could tell. Even Nobu himself played very well, hands flying up and down the neck of his guitar in a way that reminded me very much of Brad Paisley's playing.

Botan and Keiko got up to go jam with the rest of the crowd; I stayed behind, content to watch the band and observe their playing style. Yusuke got up and tried to engage Keiko, once, but she just acted polite and cool and he eventually came back to the table to sulk.

"Maybe ask her to dance?" I shouted over the music, but Yusuke just grimaced. He, like me, didn't enjoy dancing much.

The band played for maybe an hour before Nobu, looking flushed but happier than he had back in the music store, called for a break before they played their final set. The lights came back up and people started moving back to their tables. Soon Kuwabara emerged from the crowd, red faced and happy, to sit back in his seat with a contented sigh.

"That was so good," he said, grinning from ear to ear. "I'm gonna go get drinks. Anyone want one?"

A chorus of replies answered him. Kuwabara's eyes screwed up as he mentally took down all the orders, but as he stood up to go to the bar (which, I hadn't noticed before then, was off in one corner of the pavilion) he looked at us and said: "Uh, so… I probably can't carry all those. Any help?"

"Sur, dude," Yusuke said. The boy stood up and flexed his arms over his head. "I need to stretch my legs, anyway."

His words made me suddenly aware of how stiff I felt. The chairs were made of plain white wood, and my bad leg—which had poor circulation already—had fallen very much asleep.

"I'll go too," I said. I got my cane under me and stood; though difficult to move in the kimono, I still felt much better to be standing for a minute. I glanced at Hiei; he was looking at me, frowning, but I smiled at him and as I passed, I put my hand on his shoulder and gave it a small squeeze. His frown vanished.

Yusuke, Kuwabara and I walked over to the bar, where Kuwabara picked up the assorted drinks. Yusuke was jabbering in his ear about something; I watched, concentrating more on flexing my stiff muscles than paying attention to what they were saying, which is probably why I jumped so badly when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

It was Takeru.

* * *

Nobu wouldn't stop bowing, nor would he stop thanking me for the song I'd given him. I might have been annoyed by that had it not been so funny, and as we stood behind the curtain blocking the backstage from the rest of the pavilion, I felt my stomach turn a quasi-nervous flip. I hadn't played in front of a crowd in a long time; would I do well?

"I want to put it on my next album," he was saying. "I normally write my own music, so I don't know how much I need to pay you—"

I held up a hand to stop him. "I don't need to get paid," I said, utterly serious in that regard. "It's _your_ song. I just… you know, introduced you to it."

That was the truth, after all. I didn't create the song, so I didn't deserve to get paid for it. It was Nobu's—or, his double's, but since they were sort of the same person… or something… whatever, it didn't matter. The song wasn't mine to begin with!

"But I can't just take credit for it!" he protested.

"Then just call me a creative consultant on the album or something," I said. I patted his arm. "That's all I need."

This seemed to placate him; his face grew less worried, at any rate, and then he reached into his back packet and pulled a business card out of his wallet. I took it with a raised eyebrow.

"If you ever need a job, or just, you know, whatever, give me a call," he said, gesturing at the paper rectangle. "I mean it."

I tucked the card into my sleeve. "Will do. But, um… could I ask one favor?"

"Yes?"

"My friend wants your autograph."

At first, he looked shocked. Then he just laughed.

* * *

It felt weird, hefting a cherry red electric guitar in a kimono. Takeru had helped me pin back the massive sleeves so they wouldn't interfere with my playing, but I still felt out of place in my traditional attire amid a stage full of quasi-rockabilly musicians. Plus, the spotlights were bright enough to have me squinting, and as we took our places on the stage I felt a bead of sweat form on my neck. It wasn't just from the heat of the lights, either.

"We're back!" Nobu said as he walked onstage after the rest of us. The crowd let out a roar when he appeared. "We're kicking off this set with a new number—only learned it today, so be nice, guys!"

The crowd cheered again, only louder than ever. _A new single from Nobu?_ I could practically hear them thinking. _I get a sneak peek! This is awesome!_

"And I want you to be really nice to this chick, right here—" He swept his arm back to me. "She's the one who wrote it. Give Dani some love!"

The cheers were… well, not too impressive. I waved, smiling as my cheeks started to heat up from the attention, but Nobu just turned to me and covered his microphone with his hand.

"You ready?" he asked.

I tried to nod—but I stopped. Nobu's eyes went uncertain as I froze, paralyzed, because all of a sudden I felt the weight of all the eyes on me—

Then I heard Yusuke screaming.

"Woo! Go Dani, GO!" came the sound of that unmistakable voice. "Play the shit out of that guitar! Hell yeah! You can do it!"

"You'd better have gotten me that autograph, you big liar!" Kuwabara screeched. "I can't believe you didn't tell me you knew Nobu! _Gosh_! Does no one tell me anything anymore?"

"You look lovely, Dani-chan!" Botan started yelling. "The stage lights really bring out your skin tone!"

I put a hand to my face to smother a sudden laugh, and then I felt my apprehension vanish. I looked over my shoulder at the drummer and nodded my head, one, two, three, four—

We came in together perfectly in synch, and true to Yusuke's wishes I played the shit out of my guitar line. The bass and the fiddle came in a few measures later, and then Nobu—

The crowd reacted to his voice with a cheer. The music puttered along under the lyrics steadilt, until rose over the course of the first verse and really exploded into the chorus, mandolin coming in as Nobu plucked the instrument while he sang. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Takeru dancing around as he played the fiddle, but I kept my focus on the rhythm and sway of the guitar strings under the pads of my fingers, allowing my body and ears to get wrapped up in a whirlwind of sound, until—

My solo broke through the rest of the music like a thunderbolt, cracking out with notes that, to me, sounded as bright red as the guitar in my arms. I couldn't help but grin and throw my head and torso around as the notes screamed out of my instrument, and when the solo came to a rushing halt the music stripped down, going mostly acoustic as Nobu sang a variation of the chorus and then called the other instruments back into riotous play.

Though the song last for a good four minutes, when it ended I felt as though no time had passed at all—but the crowd, oh wow, they were going _nuts_. I couldn't keep from smiling as they yelled and hollered, shouting for an encore with all the force of a human tidal wave.

And Nobu, well—he turned back to his musicians and tipped us all a wink.

"Go another round?" he asked, and with gusto I started the song all over again.

* * *

Kuwabara freaked out when I gave him the autograph, and then he gave me the biggest noogie I'd ever received. My hair, carefully rendered into a traditional kimono style, was ruined, but I hardly cared because I hadn't seen him look that happy in a long time.

"You could have told us you were going to play with him," Yusuke grumbled as we piled into the vans to go back to the onsen.

"What, and ruin the surprise?" I teased. "I have to do _something_ to keep you on your toes."

On the way back, Botan and Keiko wanted to know all the gory details about how Nobu and I had met, so I told them and they were disappointed that the whole ordeal hadn't been more exciting. Yukina, however, just smiled and said in her typically quiet way: "You made Kuwabara-san very happy. Thank you for that, Dani-san."

I looked at her and smiled, but inside I was frowning. Her eyes were sincere, if not a little sad. She'd been cold to Kuwabara all night, even when he asked her to dance at one point—so what was she doing now, acting like she cared all of a sudden?

I didn't have too much time to think about it, because Botan turned the conversation to something else, and before I knew it we were back at the onsen. We somehow managed to beat the boys there, so we went to our rooms and slowly managed to get out of our kimono without running into them. I put on a pair of shorts and a tanktop and collapsed across my futon, very, very tired by the amount of walking and standing I'd done that day.

"Dani, are you not coming to the baths?"

The question had been posed by Botan. I looked up to find that the girls were wearing tan robes that were kind of like kimono, but with small ties instead of actual obi. I didn't know the name of them.

"Uh… I'm kind of tired," I said. "I think I'll just take one in the morning."

"Well, follow the signs and you'll be there in a jiffy if you decide you want to," Botan said, and she left the room with the others in tow.

I crawled into my bed and lay there while they were gone, feeling content if not a little tired… and, underneath all of that, confused. Yukina's comment about Kuwabara had me unsettled.

I tried to sleep instead of actually thinking about it, but I found myself getting restless. I sat up after only a few minutes in bed and started scribbling in my notebook, only to find that my creativity wasn't flowing, and just as I tried to go back to bed all over again, the door to the room opened.

I scrambled to sit up in my futon, because it was Hiei and I had bedhead, and that was inexcusable. "Oh, um, hi!" I twittered. "Um, what's up?"

Rather than answer, he shut the door to the room and leaned on it, looking at me with a scowl. I swallowed, nervous, but then his eyes closed and I felt a little more calm.

"Can I ask you something?" he said. His voice was soft, curiously, and I found myself a little more at ease.

"Sure," I said. "Anything."

"How did you become so close with those musicians so quickly?"

I couldn't help but just stare at him in confusion. His eyes snapped open; in them I saw frustration.

"You played with them without even _seeing_ them first," he said, voice dipping into a low growl. "You never spoke, you just played. And tonight, on that stage, you were one with them without even _practicing_. How does that happen?"

Because the answer was something instinctive rather than logical, it took me a while to find the words to say: "Music… is a language, Hiei."

At that, his head tilted almost imperceptibly to one side. I could tell he was curious.

"It's a language I speak more fluently than I speak Japanese, or even English," I said. "When I first came to this world, I felt totally alone. I didn't speak Japanese very well and no one had even _heard_ of English, but then I found the drum in my room's closet and played a song for Kuwabara… and, well, we connected." I traced my finger over the blankets I was sitting on, smiling at the fond memory. "It comforted me. Even though I was in another world, I knew that I wasn't as alone as I thought I was. So long as this world had music, I knew I could get by." I looked up at Hiei; he was frowning in an I-want-to-understand-this way. "I didn't need to speak Japanese with Nobu and Takeru to play music with them, because we were _speaking music_."

His eyes flickered shut again. I watched him, drinking in the sight of his blue-black hair and tan skin. He really was beautiful…

"I'm not the jealous type," Hiei said. "But, for us it took… a long time, to actually communicate."

"And you're concerned with how fast I connected to Takeru and Nobu?" I surmised, and I suddenly felt guilty. Had I been paying them too much attention? The urge to make Hiei at ease took over in a second. "Hiei, I connect with musicians almost on instinct, but all that's between us is the music, I swear—"

"It's… not that."

I went quiet. His eyes slowly opened, catching mine until I felt as though he were going to pull me into… something. Something I could never escape, not that I'd ever want to.

"I just wonder," he said, voice uncharacteristically pained, "how _I_ will ever connect with you the way they did, without even trying."

The absurdity of his statement—that he hadn't connected with me, for chrissake, when he was all I could think about half the time!—was heartbreaking. I groped desperately for words, and then—

"I'll give you more piano lessons!" I blurted out.

Hiei looked at me in surprise... and then he started to laugh. Well, chuckle. I liked it, whatever it was, because it rumbled in his chest before spilling over his lips and the clouds cleared from his face like a summer's rain. I knew without knowing how that everything would be OK, so I laughed, too, and smiled. How could I not when Hiei was showing me something so unguarded?

What Hiei did next, however, will go down in history as one of the biggest surprises of my entire life.

"I believe you're from another world," he said, abruptly cutting off his own laughter with an about-face-turn change in demeanor, and his eyes snapped open with a flare like a firework.

My jaw nearly hit the ground —and then I started preening. My plan had worked! Sha-zam!

Cherry eyes glared at my expression. "Don't look so superior," Hiei snapped. "Your history has major differences between this world's, but…"

He trailed off, looking frustrated.

"But… it was still close enough to be suspicious?" I asked.

Hiei nodded. I started preening again. As soon as I did, cherry eyes glared at my expression.

"Don't look so superior," Hiei snapped. "Your 'English' told me more than your stupid plan ever did. I think I've know you're from another world since I first heard you speak that terrible tongue of yours."

I said: "…wait, what?"

Hiei took on a brooding look; he wore it very well in his leather coat.

"You spoke a language that no longer existed, but you spoke ours, too, if only a little," he explained. "I saw you learning it in school, in your memories, but according to Kurama—"

My pulse beat quicker. "You brought Kurama into this?"

"Woman, let me talk!" he said. I shut up with an 'eep'. "Kurama said that back when Ren lived, it was likely they didn't learn any language but English, which makes your knowledge of Japanese taught in a _school_ of all places more than illogical—it's impossible." He paused for a second. "Your accent is also different from Ren's. That tipped me off."

I took all of that in stride… but I didn't tell him that Ren's southern accent wasn't precisely her own. Ever since she was little she'd been ousted from kids her age due to her intelligence, so she'd downgraded her grammar on purpose to sound more relatable, and the southern accent… well, she idolized a southern physicist as a kid, so she'd just copied him so consistently that the accent became a force of habit. However, Hiei didn't need to know that, and he'd probably deemed it inconsequential in my memories and just didn't remember it, but…

"Well, I'm glad you believe me," I said—and I'm sure the conversation would have gone on had someone not tried to open the door. Hiei jumped away from it with a curse, but when it opened we saw that it was only Genkai. The old psychic looked at Hiei and scowled, slightly confused, but then she saw me in my bedclothes and rumpled hair and started to slyly grin. Clearly, she'd gotten the wrong idea.

"Hello, Genkai," I said, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Hello Dani. Hiei," she said. She took one look at me and smirked. "Can't sleep?"

"Uh," I said. I glanced at Hiei, who was staring resolutely at the floor. "Not really."

"Ah," she said… and Hiei grunted an unintelligible growl before walking out and shutting the door behind him.

Genkai gave me another satisfied smirk. "When chatting up my love interests doesn't do the trick," she snarked, "warm baths help me get to sleep sometimes."

I was willing to take any suggestion that would get me out from under her intense gaze at that point, so I just forced a smile and found one of the robes the other girls had been wearing and changed into it, grabbing my bag of soaps and stuff on my way out. Genkai had busied herself calling room service for tea, so I didn't bother her with a goodbye.

I encountered Keiko and Botan on my way to the baths (signs had been posted on the walls to lead visitors to them). They were whispering to one another, looking worried, and when they spotted me they hurried over.

"Kuwabara just grabbed Yukina," Botan said. "They're talking, we don't know what about, but—"

"You might not want to go down there just yet," Keiko cut in. "Or just, you know, be quiet if you do."

My stomach fluttered with nerves. "Thanks for the heads up," I said. "I'll be quiet."

I left the girls after a brief goodbye and continued down the hall. It leaf me to a large room filled with plush couches, low tables, flowers arranged in vases, and pitchers of water and glasses at several points around the room. It was all very Zen, like a waiting room you'd find in a spa, and along one wall were three doors marked with different kanji on bronze plaques—one for men, one for women, but the last one bore a kanji I could not read.

Sitting on one of the couches with their backs to me were Yukina and Kuwabara. I stood about ten feet behind them at the mouth of the hallway, not sure what to do, so I just froze and did my best impression of a started deer as they spoke in quiet voices. I waited there for maybe a minute before Kuwabara stood up, face grim, and he turned from Yukina without a word. When he spotted me he paused, but then he said nothing and looked down at the ground before walking past me and vanishing down the hall.

Yukina, meanwhile, didn't move from her spot. Her head was bowed, hands clenched tight in her lap. I approached her with equal parts wariness and intention. I wanted to know what was going on, if I could help, what I could do to ease Kuwabara's strained look and Yukina's posture of utter sadness—because she _was_ sad. As I rounded the couch and sat down next to her, a perfectly round, pale gold crystal fell and hit her on the back of one her hands. I couldn't see her face behind her loosely falling hair, but that tear, I watched it bounce out of her lap and hit the tatami floor with a light clicking sound…

"What happened, Yukina?" I asked quietly, and I gently touched her shoulder.

I didn't expect her to throw her arms around me and press her face into the crook of my neck and shoulder, but she did, so I sat there for one stunned second before putting my arms around her. Her shoulders shook; I could feel small round knobs pressing into my shoulder, popping up every couple of seconds as if growing there. Doubtless, her tears were getting trapped between her face and my robe.

I felt the tears spill over my shoulder like spilt marbles and land on the couch when she finally pulled away, sniffing just a little.

"I'm so sorry, Dani-san," she said. She wiped her eyes with her sleeve, looking beautiful and lost. "I just…"

"Did you say something to Kuwabara?" I asked her, and when I did she ducked her head. Her hair covered her face once more.

"Remember what we talked about, a long time ago?" she asked. "It was when I told you about Kuwabara, and me, and how we…" She trailed off, looking uncomfortable. "How we…"

I did remember, even if Yukina couldn't articulate what we had talked about aloud all over again. What felt like a lifetime before, she and I had had a discussion in the temple kitchen about Yukina not being able to be with Kuwabara, not being able to give him children, all of that, and at the time she had told me about how the Koorime reproduced and how sleeping with Kuwabara might very well kill her should she conceive. She hadn't told Kuwabara about any of that stuff at the time, which meant he was pursuing her without knowing what their relationship could never be…

Suddenly, I felt a pang of regret and dread deep inside my chest. Me and Yukina… even though she did not know it, even though no one but me knew it… we were more alike that she could ever _dream_.

And if she and Kuwabara couldn't work their relationship out, as I was assuming because of their tortured expressions… what did that mean for _me_?

Oblivious to my inner turmoil, Yukina said: "You told me I should tell him about all of the things I was hiding from him. At first I didn't want to, so I was distant, and cruel, so that maybe he would stop chasing me on his own, but then I thought about it, and…"

"And did you tell him all of that, tonight?" I asked, suspecting that was the case for the sadness engulfing her—and when Yukina started nodding I shut my eyes tight, feeling awful because I didn't have the guts to do the same. "How did he react?"

"He… he said he didn't care."

My eyes opened in shock. Yukina was looking at me, disbelief, horror, and happiness waging war behind her gaze.

"But isn't that a good thing?" I said. "That he doesn't care about your… condition? Doesn't it mean you can be together?"

_ Please let it mean you can be together,_ I thought, staring at her as she stared at me. _Please, please, please—_

But Yukina was shaking her head. "He said he loves me, and that none of that matters," she said. Her voice quaked; before I knew it she was crying again, teargems plinking against one another as they fell into a pile in her lap. "And I told him it _should_ matter, and that it matters to me." She put her face in her shaking hands. "I told him I didn't want to see him anymore. I told him… I told him he was naïve!"

Before I knew it I was hugging her again, because in her I saw something rather alarming.

Myself.

I was seeing myself in Yukina… but I was seeing a much braver self than I had ever been. Remembering the conversation I'd had with her so long ago and how I'd told her she needed to tell Kuwabara all about her dilemma with having children, I saw so much hypocrisy on my part, and as I looked into Yukina's scared crimson eyes…

_ Hiei._

In her, reminded of his eyes by his sister's, I saw Hiei as well as myself, because I was deceiving him just as Yukina had been deceiving Kuwabara.

In an instant, I knew there was only one way to make this right. Not that anyone but me knew there was anything _wrong_, of course… but I'd been lying to myself. I'd been lying to myself ever since I started sorta-dating Hiei, and, by extension, I'd been lying to him, too.

How had I not seen that? How had it not occurred to me sooner? How had I tricked myself into believing that my issue—the one I never talked about if I could help it, the one I had only ever talked about with Ren, and my parents—had disappeared? Was it just out of sight, out of mind, or had my subconscious been keeping me from thinking about it on purpose, to not sabotage my relationship with Hiei?

I couldn't say. All I knew for sure was that the lie I'd been telling myself ever since things had started getting heavy with Hiei needed to come out.

It was high time I told the truth.

* * *

NOTES:

_**Countdown: 2**_

_ There's that pesky countdown again! What could it be FOR, I wonder? What will happen when it hits 0?_

_ So I WAS just going to have Nobu walk up and talk to Dani at the festival, simple simple, but… well, I just got this image in my head of seeing Dani play an actual song in front of people, and… my imagination… it just ran away with me… THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DON'T STICK TO MY CHAPTER PLANS, DAMMIT ALL TO HELL._

_ Ahem. Anyway. Wasn't planning on this much music this chapter, so I'm sorry if you're at all disappointed by its prevalence. -_-;_

_ I LOVE KUWABARA ACTING ALL EXCITED. He's just too cute. _

_ UGH, I hate writing these final chapters, but I have to fill in all the holes I've left because soon we'll have run out of time to fill them. It's now or never. And I'd hate for it to be never._

_ I've known about Dani's little secret since I first created her character. There have been several hints about it throughout this story, but I kept them very subtle because I wanted it to come as a surprise. However, while it might be surprising to you, it's not to other certain characters… but you didn't hear that from me…_

_ And yes, THERE WILL BE another chapter tomorrow, Sunday. This was the belated part two of the previous chapter… it just got out of hand and I tacked on the ending… ugh… I just want to be done with these fillery bits and move ON to the END already! GOSH! (*blah blah blah you don't care*)_

_ Many, MANY thanks to all you lovely readers! How Could This Happen To Me (been loving your reviews!), Wings of Silver Rain, Eggbert 3000, Takara Rose Oizumi, Moldy Strawberry, j.d.y., phantomxofxmystery, chocolatellubr13, etowa-ru, Kaiya's Watergarden, Caralirani, Kajihenge Yoko, Takara Taji, Captain Lupin (HA! I GOT IT!) Ferus, moani-sama, OhhTaylorJade, ephemeral violet, flaming marsh, Snowgirl7589, Mi-chan1991, TeacupKitty, TallyYoungBlood, Supreme Baka, AkaMizu-chan, ShadowFireFox13, Supreme Baka, Katt Jeane, NAO-chan33, ! _


	76. Chapter 76: Tell Me, Baby

… 1 ….

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 76:

"Tell Me, Baby"

* * *

"I don't expect you to understand, Dani-san," Yukina said. I sat by her side, wrapped up in my own guilt and the urge to tell her something that would provide her comfort—and I knew exactly what I'd say, even though I didn't want to say it. "I'm alone. None of my fellow Koorime have had this problem…" Her eyes flickered with sudden memory. "Aside from my mother, that is, but she is long since passed. I have no one to go to."

"That's… not true," I told her. Every word felt like a war. "I know… how you feel, about all of this."

She looked surprised for a moment, but then she just looked unconvinced. "How can you, Dani-san?" she said. "Your relationship with Hiei is going so well, and mine, with Kuwabara…"

I took a deep breath, steeled myself, then forced a smile in Yukina's direction.

"I have more in common with your situation than you think," I said.

Her surprised glance was tinged with curiosity. "What do you mean?"

I looked down at my lap. My hands, folded together against my knees, looked too small to handle what I was about to do. Surely they needed to be stronger, right?

_No,_ I thought. _Not them. Just me._

"Can I tell you a secret, Yukina-san?" I asked.

Her pink lips parted. Before she could say anything I shook my head, indicating that I just wanted her to listen, and she obeyed.

"It's something I've only ever told Ren, and my parents," I said. "So I want you to know that I'm telling you this because I too felt alone with my secret, and I know how much it sucks. When I _do_ choose to talk about it… well, I don't expect the people I tell to understand, but somehow, I feel like _you_ will." I nervously tucked my hair behind my ear. "Does that make sense?"

"It does," she said. She reached out and placed her hand atop mine; her fingers were cold, but soft. "But Dani-san, what secret are you talking about?"

I didn't answer right away. First I needed to set my explanation up, because… well, maybe I was just stalling, but setup seemed logical at the time.

"Back when we had that conversation about you and Kuwabara, and your issues with having kids," I said, "you told me how Koorime biology worked." I smiled grimly. "What do you know about _human_ biology? The reproductive kind, I mean?"

She seemed perturbed when she said: "I… know some of it."

I puffed out my cheeks before sighing. Then, steeling myself, I launched into an explanation reminiscent of the one I gave the Sisters in Demon World—AKA, I told her what periods were, and why they happened. I made sure I covered all the bases, as embarrassing as they were, and when I finished explaining all the details about hormones…

"Most girls get their first period when they hit puberty, in their early teens or pre-teen years," I said. "From then on you get one a month. It means you're ready to have kids, or your body is, at least, but me…"

The words caught in my throat.

Yukina's voice was gentle when she said: "But you, what?"

I swallowed. My eyes squeezed shut tight.

"I… didn't get my first one 'til I was eighteen," I said, "and I haven't had one since."

And with that, my secret was out. I instantly felt as though a weight both pressed down and lifted off my shoulders; now someone knew and I didn't have to hide, but then again, I'd also have to face Yukina's reaction—speaking of which—

Yukina didn't say anything, but her hand did tighten around mine. I sat there in silence for a few moments, wondering behind my closed eyes just what expression she was wearing, when—

"What does that mean?" she said softly. "That you haven't had one since?"

Finally, I cracked my eyes open. Yukina stared at me, lightly frowning, but her eyes… oh, I saw something in them, some form of recognition…

"I don't know," I managed to force out. "Nobody does. My doctor said… she said that I just have a really frail body and that my hormones are all over the place, so with medication things could…" I stopped talking to swallow again; my throat felt thick and sore, making it hard to finish saying: "There's a chance that I might not ever have kids. We just don't know."

As I sat there, waiting for Yukina to react, memories made my eyes press tight once more. My parents had wanted to put me on hormone therapy at one point in my life, but I had protested even when Mother had broken down into tears at the clinic, pleading with me to take the pills so I could one day give her a grandkid. Father had been the one to let me make my own decision; after all, there had been a chance that the hormone supplements could have caused _more_ complications as I grew, and since it was my body, he thought I should have the final say. Despite Mom's wishes, I was content with waiting to see if my body might even itself out as I got older. However, at age twenty and with only one period under my belt, my ability to have kids was anyone's guess… every time one of my female friends mentioned wanting to be a mother, what they'd name their children, no one but Ren—Ren with her secret looks of pity and comfort—understood why I'd quickly change the subject, or why when girls complained about cramps and bloating I'd just smile and tell them my periods weren't all that bad, but then make an excuse to leave the room so I could drop the fake expression and just be myself.

I felt the ice apparition's cold fingers shiver around mine; the sensation brought me back to the present, where I saw that Yukina stared not _at_ me, but _through_ me. Her frown had vanished, replaced by that look I had earlier glimpsed, that look of recognition and straight-up, pull-no-punches compassion, the kind only someone as sweet and genuine as Yukina could show another living soul.

"Thank you for trusting me with this, Dani-san," she said. "I feel… I feel like we are the same, you and I. But…"

Her next words… they surprised me.

"Have you told Hiei?" she asked.

I said nothing. I just looked at her, and she took my silence for what it was: a 'no'.

"You _have_ to tell him, Dani," she said. Her other hand reached out to grabbed mine, cradling my fingers within a cold cage of her own. "He deserves to know."

"I know," I said, because I did. "I just… it's not a _definite_ I-can't-have-kids. It's a _maybe_-I-can't-have-kids. I could get better." I laughed a little. "And the changes that have come with my body being a demon's, maybe that fixed things."

"Hiei still deserves to know," she said.

I looked down at our entwined hands. My skin was a shade darker than Yukina's thanks to the weird tan I'd gotten from Sweet, and my nails were as bright red as ever. I'd even clipped them and they hadn't changed…

"I guess," I said, "that I just don't like admitting to myself that I might not be able to… to…"

I couldn't finish my sentence. The thick soreness in my throat suddenly twinged with sharp pain, and before I could stop it my eyes welled up with tears. I wrenched my hands out of Yukina's and pressed the heels of them into my eye sockets, trying to force the tears back as hard as I possibly could.

Yukina put her arms around me with a murmur of "Oh, Dani." I dropped my hands from my eyes and twined them around her in return, accepting the chill of her embrace because within it I felt the warmth of her companionship. A single tear slipped down my cheek; her thumb brushed it away, and I pulled back from her. Her hands came to rest on my shoulders so she could look me in the eye, so I couldn't escape the kind intensity of her expression.

"Thank you for trusting me with this," she said. "I won't tell a soul, but _you_… you should tell Hiei."

Her hand moved. I didn't know what she was supposed to be doing when she folded back the neck of my robe until her fingers brushed over a sensitive spot on my neck. I flinched, but Yukina merely smiled.

"He _marked_ you," she said as she lightly tapped the scar on my throat. "He deserves to know."

* * *

After Yukina and I parted, I went alone into the bathroom. My hand seemed remarkably steady as I peeled back my robe's hem, but my breath came ragged as I stared at the mark on my throat, its image reflected with perfect clarity in the mirror above the marble sinks. What had once been red and scabby was now pale pink, slightly scaly, a mostly-healed scar that would soon fade to white, and then to nothing as time went by.

I lifted my other a hand and traced the lines of it with my fingertip. It felt warmer than the rest of me, warm like Hiei.

I knew I should tell him. It was the right thing to do—and yet—

What if he didn't react like Kuwabara, with kind words and acceptance?

What if he didn't want me anymore, because of the mother I could not be?

* * *

Sleep, when it came, was both melodramatic and informative.

I was hovering above the scene, looking down at it as the action played out beneath the soles of my hovering feet. Candles flickered. Fifteen of them had been arranged in a circle around a pedestal, on which sat something obscured in shadow. Behind each candle stood a dark figure, the details of their faces lost in the gloom.

Koenma—the one from the present—stood before the pedestal with his hands held over it. He muttered under his breath, and as I watched his hands began to glow an electric gold.

On cue, the ones behind the candles raised their hands. Gold surrounded their fingers as well, and then the gold streamed outward to meet above Koenma's head like a cage.

And then the gold sputtered, and the candles winked out.

Koenma stumbled back from the pedestal with a curse; from it sprung light that was more dark than illumination, darkness that writhed and cackled with sound that was not sound, faces unearthly bubbling up within the shadow with leering scarlet eyes and teeth like bone—

The cage of golden light started to tremble. Then, it surged downward and hit Koenma like a bolt of lightning, and to the palms of his hands the light was channeled. It forced back the surge of darkness with a rush, and the faces receded back into the thing on the pedestal with a low whisper of pure malice.

The room went utterly black after that—but I heard Koenma say: "Dammit. Let's try this again."

"It won't work, you know."

I spun as if suspended in honey. Koenma, the Future Koenma, floated in the air behind me. While the air around us was utterly dark, he was perfectly illuminated. I felt like I could taste the fabric of his robes, smell the dust on his skin... but why was he here? And what had I just seen?

"The seal Koenma wants to use isn't strong enough to contain the Beasts," he said mournfully. "All it can do is delay their emergence for a little while."

"Emergence?" I asked.

He nodded. "All the energy surrounding the Beasts is waking them up. They're getting stronger even as my past self tries to seal them away."

"I see," I said. A feeling of dread washed over me. "I… see."

Koenma smiled grimly. "The Beasts are strong. Even though the seal my past self wants to use is very, very strong, it's not the strongest ever."

That bothered me. "But Koenma said—"

"The strongest seal in Spirit World is the Mafuken, Dani," Koenma said. "The spell Koenma is using is second only to the Mafuken. Nothing else compares."

My memory was drawn to the Present Koenma's pacifier at the mention of the Mafuken. To think that little thing…

"Only, his Mafuken is not what it should be," Future Koenma went on. "He—I mean, _I_ used its store of power during the Sensui case. Not enough time has passed for it to gather the energy to regain its full strength."

I looked at the Future Koenma. "You don't have _your_ pacifier anymore," I observed, looking at his empty, unhappy mouth. "Where did it go?"

He didn't answer for a minute. Hair fell into his eyes, obscuring his expression, but his mouth had pressed into a thin line.

"I… had no need if it," he said. His hand dipped into the pocket of his robe… and pulled out a small red notebook.

Time seemed to freeze. Slowly, Koenma flipped the notebook's dog-eared cover open. He flipped through the pages without really seeing them.

"I've been storing energy in this," he said. "This… is my Mafuken. With it, I plan to…"

He stopped.

"Plan to what?" I asked.

He looked up at me. Then, slowly, he smiled.

"You'll see," he said—

—and I was awake.

* * *

The booths lining the Shinto shrine's stairs seemed less magical in the daylight, but in the same stroke they seemed far more real, too. I hugged my sweatshirt tighter around myself as I watched people mill about, buying trinkets and playing games and eating some of the festive foods… speaking of which, it was around noon and I was getting hungry. We'd had breakfast hours ago; when would we eat again?

"Now, everyone, we have all day to explore and have fun," Botan said after we got out of the vans and prepared to take the festival by storm. "The fireworks show is scheduled to start right after the sun sets, so we should all meet up at the shrine an hour before so we can find a spot to sit and watch. Sound good, everyone?"

No one had a better plan, so we all agreed that would be fine before moving en masse toward the stairs. I lagged behind the others because of my leg (naturally) but I didn't really mind much because right at the foot of the stairs there was a music demonstration involving a taiko drum, a shakuhachi flute, and a shamisen. I stopped to watch as the others took the steps to higher-up booths.

The taiko drum was huge, and as I watched a muscular young man play it, I wistfully thought about how I'd never be able to play that instrument. The taiko took an almost-martial-art form to play, after all, and required its player to stand and shift their weight continuously from foot to foot. I wasn't familiar with woodwinds, either, so the shakuhachi would probably be beyond me, but the shamisen…

I didn't know Hiei had hung back with me until he said, from his spot standing vigil at my side: "This music is nothing like yours."

I flinched and looked at him, but no words came out. His red eyes narrowed when I gave him a faux-chipper smile.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

The taiko drum sounded louder than my heartbeat, but only by a slim margin. My smile froze under Hiei's glare; I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and looked back at the performers, trying not to sound nervous when I finally gave him an answer.

"Just listening, that's all," I said. I jerked my hand toward the musicians. "You're right. It's nothing like my music."

"But that's not what's bothering you," he said.

Slowly, I looked at him again. His eyes were hooded, like he was expecting the worst… which I suppose he was, considering what I needed to tell him. But—

_Not right now,_ I thought. A crowd had gathered around the taiko player; I needed to do this in private. _This isn't the moment._

"Can't you tell what I'm thinking?" I joked to cover my unease. "Through the mark and all?"

I expected him to scoff and then say of course he could, Hiei's inborn arrogance shining through with a satisfied smirk—but he didn't. He shifted from foot to foot, and with the slow, deliberate movements of someone trying to calm a skittish animal, he lifted a hand toward the neck of my sweatshirt. I couldn't help but shiver; he was warm, I could feel him even though his skin wasn't even touching mine as he peeled back the fabric and stared at the mark itself.

"It's healing," he said. His gaze flickered up to meet mine. "The sense I have of you is growing fainter. If they were mutual, they would be more permanent."

"Oh," I said, blushing and unable to say much else because I didn't know what else to do… and I think Hiei could tell that my mind had gone back to reliving the oddly sensual act of getting marked, because the smirk I knew and loved so much came out as he let go of my shirt and turned to the musicians.

"Dani-chan! Yoo-hoo, Dani-chan!"

Botan's voice cut over the music like a pink, glittery knife, and before I could even locate her she had snuck up on me, a grinning blue blur who hooked her arm through mine and started tugging me toward the stairs and the booths. As a cry of surprise slipped out of my mouth, and I heard Hiei say: "What are you _doing_?"

"We're taking pictures!" she shot over her shoulder. We reached the stairs; because I had to go up them so slowly, Botan wrapped her arm around my waist with as giggle and practically lifted me up the stairs by herself. "Hurry, Dani, let's go!"

As it turns out, Keiko had stumbled upon a Purikura booth one of the booth owners had shipped in to attract customers looking to commemorate their time at the festival—although 'purikura' wasn't what they called the contraption that was the most high-tech photobooth I had ever seen in my life. It had a touch screen inside with a camera mounted above it, so you could edit your pictures and print them off with little designs all over them and stuff. Botan and Keiko had already printed off reams of photo stickers, but the minute Botan got me in the vicinity of the booth she shoved me past its bright pink curtain and onto the bench within… and two seconds later Hiei came barreling past the curtain and all but wound up sitting in my lap. We scrambled off one another with curses and fervently awkward looks; I blurted: "What are _you_ doing in here?"

"I asked where you'd gone and they shoved me in!" he spat as he swatted at the curtain—when he did, Botan stuck her head in and gave us her best kitty-face.

"Now now, you two, I've already put money in the machine, so take some pictures and don't complain!" she said.

I crossed my arms over my chest and raised an eyebrow. "This isn't exactly our speed, Botan."

"…meow?" she said by way of piteous plea, and then she disappeared.

I looked at Hiei. He was staring at me with a clearly confused and unhappy look on his face. "What the hell does she want us to do?" he asked, voice raised just a smidge. "What is this box? Why did she shove us in here? What is this all about?"

Sensing that he was on the verge of having another incident like the one with the automatic doors (when Hiei's eyes get shifty you know he's not having fun), I pointed at the black lens mounted above the screen. "That's going to take our picture, and we're going to edit it and… stuff, on the screen." I adjusted my hand to indicate the LCD monitor. "Botan'll pitch a fit if we don't, and it shouldn't take more than a few minutes…"

"This is strange. I don't like it," Hiei declared, but I just rolled my eyes and began navigating the machine's startup sequence. After saying we were ready, the screen started counting down from three, to two, to one…

I quickly grabbed Hiei's arm and pulled him close enough for me to cheekily put my head on his shoulder. He looked down at me, startled, as I smiled and the camera's flashbulb went off. Then our picture came up on the screen. I didn't look terrible, I decided, and Hiei looked nice despite his wide eyes, looking-at-me-instead-of-the-camera-pose, and surprise-parted mouth.

He studied the screen with even deeper shock than he showed in the picture itself. I giggled. "Never had your picture taken before?" I asked.

He scowled. "Of course I have!"

"You just look so surprised," I joked, and I noticed that the screen was counting down to take another shot. I quickly pointed at the camera; Hiei followed my point with his eyes on instinct, clearly confused as to what I was indicating, and just as the counter got to one I leaned up and swiftly kissed his cheek. He looked absolutely flabbergasted in that shot, let me tell ya, and I quickly started to crack up when he clapped a hand over the spot that I'd kissed as though trying to keep it from getting away, or something.

"Oh my god, your _face_!" I laughed. I clapped my hands together and then rested my hands on my knees so I could support my shaking body. "Oh lord, your face, Hiei! Your _face_!"

"You cheated!" he said—and as he glared down at me, tears slipping from the corners of my eyes, the camera went off. That picture was almost as hilarious as the previous one, although I looked like an utter idiot in it since I was cracking up. Hiei just looked incensed.

My laughter quieted a little. I wiped my eyes with my thumbs. "It was totally worth whatever you're going to try to get me back with," I joked—and then, before I could try to resist, Hiei's arm went around my waist, he grabbed one of my wrists and yanked my hand flat against his chest, and he was kissing me.

For a moment I froze, but then his warmth, his scent, his _everything_ that was him washed over me, and I felt myself melt into him. My hand fisted into his shirt as I tried to get closer, to get a better taste—

_ Click!, _went the camera.

My eyes snapped open. Hiei's slowly cracked open, too, and his mouth against mine curled into a smile, one that made his eyes glitter with satisfaction and more than a little mockery. I pushed away from him with a glare and mock-punched his arm.

"Now _that_ was cheating!" I told him with only a little bit of breathless anger… but then, that smile of his—

_—I don't deserve that smile._

My giddiness at the force of his kiss vanished. It hit me as we stared at one another, me with hands pillowed on his chest and him with hands resting on my waist, lightly, possessively, but gently, too, that Yukina—she was right, she was right, I needed—

My smile vanished. So did Hiei's. We stared at one another, me with frightened earnestness and him with affection—

"I have something to tell you," I said.

_ Click!_

"What is it?" he said. The affection did not leave his eyes; I don't know what he expected me to say, but I was sure it wasn't what I had in mind. Neither of us turned to look at the photo on the screen.

"I—" I said.

"You done in there?"

I ripped my hands off of Hiei like I'd been electrocuted; he did the same. Botan had stuck her head in to see us, and when she saw how close we were sitting she began to grin.

"Ooh, how cute!" Botan gushed. "I knew this was a good idea!"

"Shut it," I grumbled. I didn't bother editing the pictures and just clicked the 'print' option. "We took the pictures. Are you happy now?"

"Not quite yet," Botan said, and she latched onto the back of Hiei's coat and dragged him bodily out of the booth. Our eyes met just as he passed through the pink curtain; I could tell Botan was going to get an earful as soon as Hiei got his footing, but before I could follow him out another familiar face joined me in the booth.

"Hey, darlin'!" Ren said. She cuddled up to me and, when the booth's printer spat out a ream of photos with a mechanical buzzing noise, she grabbed them and give them a once-over. "Ooh, you look cute, and that Hiei boy—"

She stopped talking. Her brow furrowed. Then, as I watched, her face morphed into a mask of utter and complete horror.

I grabbed the photos out of her hand because I knew what was coming. "I like him, OK?" I said, glancing at the kissing picture. A single glimpse of it made my ears go red; I was clinging to Hiei the way a drowning person clings to a raft. "You knew that. I told you back when you first woke up."

Ren swallowed down a reply as she remembered, lips thinning into something resembling a reluctant pout—but underneath it I saw something else, some form of panic mixed with desperation, and what was _that_ about? Her eyes slipped to the pictures in my hand; she regarded them with that tortured expression for a long, silent moment as I waited for her reply.

"I know, I know," she said at last. She met my eyes, still looking rather hurt. "But darlin', I didn't think the two of you were…"

Her hand waved at the pictures. I shoved them into my pocket and out of sight.

"We're serious, Ren," I said quietly. "We're _very_ serious." Then, remembering what I had been trying to tell Hiei before Botan interrupted, I leaned my forehead against the wall of the booth and groaned. "I mean, hell, we're serious to the point I was about to tell him about… well, _you_ know, my condition?"

Ren looked curious, and confused. "Your what, now?"

"My… _you_ know!" I said. I poked at my abdomen. "The thing I don't tell people about?"

She frowned. "… your pant size?"

I swatted her arm. She yelped. I pressed the 'start' button on the screen to distract myself, and as the countdown began Ren and I looped our arms around each other and smiled cheekily at the camera. The shot came out very cute, but as Ren inspected it I dropped my voice low so no one outside the booth could hear what I told her.

"I'm talking about my _period_, Ren," I said softly. "You know… how I might not be able to have kids?"

Ren froze.

* * *

Her reaction—freezing solid, eyes locked on the screen, hands on her knees—bothered me. It bothered me even more when her head turned slowly in my direction; Ren looked like she was swimming in molasses, and I could tell that my brilliant friend's brain was similarly impeded.

_But,_ I found myself thinking, _she knows all about my problem_. _Why does she look so shocked?_

The camera went off and captured the moment perfectly, freezing her blank, wide-open eyes and my tense expression perfectly. Ren's mouth moved, lips parting and closing and parting again, but no sound came out. I put my hand on her shoulder and squeezed. "You OK?"

"You… were about to _tell him_?" she said. The words came out in a gasp.

"He deserves to know, doesn't he?" I said. "I mean, if he's interested in being with me forever, the way demons are, then he deserves—"

"Don't tell him _anything_!"

My mouth fell open. Ren had turned to me with the single fiercest expression I had ever, _ever_ seen her wear; her eyes practically glowed like some sort of feral cat's, and I pulled back on reflex. She had never given me a look like that before in our lives.

_Click_, went the camera.

"What are you talking about?" I managed to choke out.

Ren's air went from fierce to reluctant in a millisecond. She turned her face away, shamed by something she wasn't saying, and to my intense horror her eyes filled with tears. I stared, staggered by this.

"I can't tell you, Dani," she said.

It took a second for that to sink in. When it did, I said: "What do you mean, you can't tell me?"

She said nothing. I reached out and grabbed her shoulder, spinning her to face me. I ignored the tear that slipped from the corner of her eye even though it near about broke my heart

"Tell me, Ren," I demanded of her. "Tell me or I swear to God—"

The camera went off again. I didn't look at the screen to see what it showed, because I already knew Ren was crying and that I was glaring at her and that she was keeping something from me, something big, because Ren never cries. _Never_. Not unless it's huge.

For a moment we just sat there, her avoiding my look and me trying desperately to keep her looking at me. But then, when it seemed like an eternity had gone by, she said: "It would only hurt you, if I told."

"I don't understand," I said, because I didn't. "What can't you tell me, and why can't I tell Hiei?" I tightened my fingers on her shoulder. "What do you know that I don't, Ren?"

She reached up and grasped my wrists. I looked at her hands, so much bigger than mine, and when I raised my head back to her face I found her looking at me. Though tears stained her cheeks, her eyes were dry. Red, but dry, and her face was set. She'd obviously come to some sort of decision… but what?

"I can't tell you anything, Dani," she said in a strong, steady voice, "but if you like the boy, I mean _really like him_, then don't tell him anything." She let go of my wrist long enough to cup my cheek. "It'll only cause you grief."

I couldn't look away from Ren, who looked at me in turn with so much love and affection that I felt myself begin to tear up on my own. She got to me that way.

"Ren," I said, fully intending to ask her to tell me, to plead with her if need be, but she just pulled me into a hug. It took a second, but eventually I returned her embrace

"Trust me. Please," she said in my ear. "Just please, please trust me."

The camera went off for the fifth and final time.

* * *

Hiei knew something was wrong when I came out of the booth, but he had the grace not to ask. He knew I'd just fight him about it. He understood me like that. He just walked by my side as we trailed behind the rest of the group, allowing me to be silent and think because he knew that's all I wanted just then.

Ren, however… for all she knew me and loved me, she didn't have it in her to just leave me alone. She kept calling me over to different booths and asking Botan to buy me food because I, apparently, looked like I was about to keel over dead from hunger.

In truth, I hadn't eaten in a while, but I wasn't hungry. I was too deep in thought to care about food. What had Ren meant when she said I shouldn't tell Hiei? Why had she been so adamant on the subject? Why had she cried? And what in the world was she keeping from me, the thing she knew about me that I didn't even know myself?

I figured, after about an hour of mulling it over as we walked around the festival, that it probably had to do with my double's life, or at least the parts of it I hadn't lived myself. To Ren it looked like I was missing memories; maybe something in those memories was making her not want me to tell Hiei that I was possibly barren? But what could do that? Had my double had kids, or something? And if that was the case, why wouldn't Ren tell me about that? That's something I would _want_ to know; that was something I would _want_ her to tell me, because she knew how much I agonized over my condition and any hints that I wasn't barren would be met with open arms.

Even though I had agreed to trust her, I wasn't going to stop wanting to know.

Anyway, Ren. She shoved about six different foods on me before she decided I had eaten enough (though I did sneak the food to Yusuke and Kuwabara and Hiei when she wasn't looking), but that didn't stop her incessant doting and smothering. She started trying to buy me things with the money Botan had given her; I rejected the stuffed animals, the hair clips, the cell phone charms, and I bore her attempts to get through my foul mood patiently, but a few hours of taking them without a word… well, is it any wonder I snapped? I was lucky my temper held out to the point when she shoved a piece of white tissue paper folded into a small packet in my arms, gushing about how she wanted me to open it because I was sure to just love what was inside, and I couldn't help but snarl: "Ren. Back _off_!"

I immediately regretted saying that, because she pulled away from me as if I had electrocuted her. A small, sad smile creased her face as she turned away with a muttered apology, and as she walked back toward the rest of the group with stooped shoulders I felt my heart sink.

"… I messed up just now, didn't I?" I said.

Hiei snorted. "Massively."

"It's just, she was just so… clingy," I tried to explain, but my excuses sounded lame even to my ears. I shook my head from side to side and tried to thread my hands into my hair, but one of them was still holding the tissue paper packet and couldn't do it. I glared down at the gift as though I could blame it for everything, which of course I couldn't.

"She was trying to take care of you," Hiei said. He stared at Ren, who hovered at the edge of the group as they looked at a tank of baby turtles. She looked positively miserable; I felt positively guilty. "You hate that. She should know that. But you shouldn't punish her for loving you, either."

He was right. He and I both knew that. Wondering what to do, I sighed and put my weight on my good foot, handing my white cane over to Hiei so I could free up my hands.

"Let's see what I just alienated my best friend over, shall we?" I said, trying to lighten the mood as I tore the top of the packet and spilled its contents on to my palm.

"Don't be glib," Hiei said, but I hardly cared because I was too busy staring at Ren's gift.

She'd bought me a locket in the shape of an apple. The gold chain—fine linked and shimmering—supported the weight of the pendant. The locket was about the side of a silver dollar and had a gold hinge; it was edged in a sliver of gold, too. The face of it, however, was made of green enamel, and as I held the locket up it spun around to reveal its other side. It was red, bright red, red like cherries and…

I held it up for Hiei to see. In my vision and in the way I was holding the locket in the air by the chain, the pendant aligned perfectly with one of Hiei's eyes… and it was a similar color, too. As I marveled at the serendipity of that, I realized that the green enamel reminded me very much of the color of Ren's powers, not to mention her eyes, although it wasn't a precise match to either.

"It's so pretty," I said softly. I lowered the locket and placed it on my palm. I caught the latch with my thumbnail and cracked it open just because I could, but when I did I stopped to stare.

Ren had placed a picture inside. It was of us hugging. You could see Ren's face over my shoulder, eyes screwed up tight and face a portrait of sincere love, and my face in profile showed trust—confused trust, but still: Trust.

"Where did she…?" I said, until I recognized the background of the picture as the inside of the photo booth. I hadn't thought to grab the pictures out of the try, so I deduced Ren had taken them when we left the booth together.

Hiei looked over my shoulder to see the photograph. His eyes widened. I smiled.

"I'm going to go make nice for a minute, OK?" I said.

He hesitated before dipping an affirmative nod and holding out my cane. I took it, stopping to wrap my free arm around his neck in a brief, spontaneous hug, which he returned. He looked a bit confused when I pulled back.

"I know I've snapped at you before, like the way I snapped at Ren," I said softly. "I'm sorry. I'm going to try and be better about it."

Hiei's lips quirked. "Good," he said, and with a gentle push between my shoulder blades he shoved me in Ren's direction. "Now go."

I did, glancing over my shoulder once with a small grin. Hiei's returning smirk gave me a modicum of strength, so when I tapped Ren on the shoulder to get her to turn back to me… well, I was only a little nervous.

"Hi, Dani," she said. She spoke with the voice I'd use to calm a frightened animal. "What's up?"

I turned my back on her and combed my hair over one shoulder. Then I slipped my arm behind me and shook the locket so it jangled, like a dozen small bells in the cold winter air.

"Can you put it on me?" I asked, and I felt her take the locket with warm fingers. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm just a little stressed after what you told me in the booth."

"I understand," she said as she slipped the locket over my head and worked the clasp at the nape of my neck. When I felt the cold metal chain settle on my skin I turned around to face her. "You know how bad I can get 'bout givin' you your space."

"It's fine," I told her.

She pointed at my chest. "Do you like it?"

I looked down at the locket lying on my sweatshirt and smiled. "I love it."

"And the picture?"

"It's awesome. Did you put it in there yourself?"

Her grin—one of forgiveness and bygones being bygones—made me grin in return. "Nah, the vendor offered," she said. "He had to size the image to the frame and stuff."

I put my hand in the kangaroo pouch of my sweatshirt, fingering the strip of photos of me and Hiei. "Where's the vendor?" I asked, and Ren skipped off with a shout to follow her.

* * *

I didn't want to put the photo of Hiei and I basically making out in my locket, nor did I want to use the one of us staring at one another in a very intimate way, nor the one of me laughing my ass off because it wasn't exactly pretty… so it came down to the one of me leaning on Hiei's shoulder, and the one of my kissing his cheek. I picked the kissing one because I looked slightly less stupid in it than I did in the leaning one (Hiei looked good in them all), and because the pose was pretty darn cute if I do say so myself. The leaning one was just too bland and I didn't know if I'd ever get another opportunity to get a cutesy image of Hiei like that again, so it made sense to use it to the fullest.

Ren, however, was obviously bothered by me asking the vendor to place the image in the locket. She watched with a frown as I told the vendor which photo to use, and when I took the locket back with the picture in place I cut off her comments by saying: "You and Hiei are the most important people to me right now. It just makes sense for you both to be in here, you know?"

"It just seems weird to me," Ren said as we walked off to find the group again. She had her hands shoved in her pockets, looking morose and unsatisfied. "You've known him for what, three months?"

I calculated it in my head. "That's about right, I think."

"And you've known _me_ for _years_," she said. "Why does he get a spot in the locket, too?"

I stopped walking. Ren did, too. I quickly looked around, spotting no sign of the others as we stood in the middle of the stairs, the crowd flowing around us like water… I mean, I didn't want any of the others to hear me tell Ren the one thing that I was sure would make her adore Hiei in a second, because surely anyone I loved would be gold in her book…

I curled my fingers at Ren, telling her to come closer. We stood only inches apart, her looking down at me with a curious face more befitting a cat than my companion.

"Ren," I said slowly, "I think I'm in love with him."

She didn't say a word for a moment. Then she pulled back.

"You're serious," she said—and it was not a question. "Dani, you're _serious_."

"I realized it a few days ago," I said, rushing the words because I wanted Ren to share my joy, because just talking about loving Hiei made me smile. "I've been holding back for a while now, we've been dancing around it for ages but I finally think we're about to make the next step, and—and Ren, what's wrong?"

She had started to walk away. The crowd parted before her as she pulled her hands through her short-cropped hair, head tilted back so she could look at the blue sky above as though pleading with God for something.

"Ren?" I called after her. I took a few steps forward. "Hey! What's going on?"

She stopped walking, immobile with her hands still on her head. Then, in a flash of green eyed fury, she spun around on her heel.

"You _can't_ be in love with him!" she yelled. "You just _can't_! Take it back _right now_!"

My jaw fell to the floor. People around us stopped to stare, but I barely saw them. I only had eyes for Ren as she stomped her foot and let loose a string of curses, ones I can't repeat because they're just too horrible to say a second time.

"What has gotten into you?" I hissed, stalking over to her. "I thought you'd be happy for me!"

That made her look a bit guilty, but not guilty enough to clear the anger from her expression. She turned and started to storm off again, cursing all the while.

"What the hell, Ren?" I called after her, pitching my voice high and angry so it would carry over the crowd. "What the _hell_? Are you _jealous_ or something?"

Her reaction came immediately and vehemently. "No!" she shouted, spinning around and stomping back over to me like a raging bull (people scattered to let the tall girl through, jumping back in sudden fear). When she came close enough she jabbed me in the chest with her forefinger. "No! No _way_! It's not _me_, it's just that _loo_—"

The last word was just a syllable. Just… 'loo'. Simple as that. However, something about it told me that it _wasn't_ simple, because she stopped talking before she got the rest of the word out, finger still resting on my sternum. The horror in her eyes said she'd said too much as clear as day. I lifted my eyebrows, reaching up to close my hand around her wrist so she couldn't get away again.

"Loo?" I asked quietly. "Were you… about to call Hiei a 'loser', or something?"

"No," she said. She paused, thinking, then bit her lip so hard it turned white. She looked away when she told me to "Never mind."

"Ren," I said. "Ren, what were you going to say?"

She yanked her arm away. "Forget it, Dani," she grumbled. "Just forget it."

I couldn't walk fast enough to keep up with Ren's long legs. Before I knew it, she had vanished into the crowd.

* * *

The others found me first. They'd noticed that Ren and I had gone missing, and it took about one panicked hour for us to find Ren, who had gotten hopelessly lost and somehow wound up way at the top of the steps at the front entrance of the Shinto shrine. She very pointedly ignored me when we reconnected with her, walking quickly away from me every time I tried to get close to ask what she'd been wanting to say back at the locket booth.

"I thought the two of you had made up," Hiei said as we walked around exploring the temple.

"I was hoping you wouldn't notice," I said glumly.

"Hard not to when you act like this," he said.

I didn't answer. We had stumbled, just then, onto a small garden filled with simple fountains and lush plant life. I walked out onto the crushed gravel path, trialing my fingers over the broad leaves of a fern. The water sounds were soothing; I closed my eyes to listen, and off in the distance I heard the peal of a wind chime.

If I pretended, it almost felt like we were back at Genkai's. The sensation gave me comfort.

"I put one of the pictures of us, one of the ones we took in the photo booth… I put one in Ren's locket," I said with my eyes still closed.

From only a few feet away (though I hadn't heard him walk across the crunchy gravel path) I heard Hiei say: "And she's angry?"

The chime, low-pitched and bell-like, rang a little louder when the wind blew by in a more vicious gust. It was colder up here than it had been at the foot of the stairs, since the wind picked up the higher we climbed.

"She was, a little," I admitted. "She just thinks you and I have moved too fast… I'm assuming that, at least, since she asked how long we've known each other and got all pissy after she heard we've only known each other for a few months."

I opened my eyes in time to see Hiei toss his head; his eyes glittered as the sunset picked up the pigments in his irises and made them shine. With a start I realized the sun was going down. I'd forgotten how early it set in that season.

"That's a stupid concern," Hiei said. "Connections override time. Didn't she bond with you the minute you met?"

Though I nodded, I defended Ren regardless. "She just doesn't know what you and I have been through," I reasoned as I closed my eyes once more. "That's all. She'd change her tune if she knew."

"So explain it to her," Hiei said, like it was obvious.

My eyes cracked open again. The fern in my hand was brown around the edge; obviously, winter wasn't being kind to these plants.

"I tried," I said. I turned my head; Hiei stood with his hands in his pockets, glowering at the plant in my hand for whatever reason, but when he felt my eyes on him he looked up. "I told her… how important you are to me."

I had to look away at that. I'd really told her I loved him, but he didn't need to know that… yet.

When _was_ I going to tell him, anyway?

I snapped out of my internal world when Hiei said something I didn't catch. "Hmm?"

"I said, why did that anger her?" he repeated.

I sighed dramatically. "I don't know. She wouldn't tell me!" I threw up my hands in exasperation. "She flipped out and said I wasn't allowed to, uh, _care_ for you the way I do, and when I asked her if she was jealous she freaked out even more, saying no, she wasn't jealous, it's just that loo—" I stopped talking and held out my empty hands to Hiei, showing him that I had nothing else to say as I shrugged and gave a fake smile. "And that's when she cut off. In the middle of the word. All I got was 'loo'."

Hiei's brow furrowed. "That's stupid."

"You're telling me?"

We lapsed into silence. The chime in the distance tolled. Suddenly, the fact that Hiei and I were alone…

"You were going to tell you something in the photo booth."

I snapped my face his way in surprise; he'd thought of the same thing I had, but he didn't look as nervous as I suddenly felt. He just looked… expectant, and maybe a little… happy?

"I was just about to bring that up," I admitted. _What's his look about?_

He smirked. "Connection," he reminded me. "See?"

"Yeah," I said. I curled my hair behind my ears with cold fingers. "So, um…"

A crunching noise behind me made me turn, and then I saw Genkai appear from behind the trunk of a young plum tree with bare, skeletal branches. She caught sight of me and Hiei and stopped to gesture for us to follow her.

"We're all going to pray before we watch the fireworks," she said. "Come on. You're wasting my time."

"But, I'm not Shinto," I said with a gesture at the temple. _And dammit, stop interrupting me, people!_

"Neither am I," she replied. "And anyway, do I look like I care?"

Hiei walked past me without a word, but he didn't look too happy about it and I felt much the same way. I just wanted to get telling him over with—

_But wait,_ I thought suddenly. _Didn't I decide _not_ to tell him, because of what Ren said?_

The fact that I hadn't remembered my promise to her told me a lot about my subconscious desires. I still wanted to tell Hiei even despite what Ren told me; that much was obvious. But, Ren…

As I followed Genkai and Hiei out of the garden, onto the temple's porch, and into a dark doorway, I let my thoughts muddle up my mind and turn everything into a sludge of indecision. I almost didn't notice Hiei come to a stop, but luckily I did in time to keep from running into him. I peered around his dark shoulders to find the rest of the group huddled around a large box with rope wrapped around it, and… were those _spell tags_ hanging off the rope?

I took a look around me, then. We were in a shadowy with light provided by a multitude of flickering torches, and above us arched one of the traditional Shinto arches I'd come to know so well. The room had a high ceiling, traditional Japanese architecture, and massively thick ropes hanging crisscrossed from the rafters. They dipped low enough to be touchable, if you were tall enough, and from these ropes hung hundreds of little wooden plaques about the size of my hand.

Botan was busy passing out what appeared to be coins. Genkai passed one to me without taking one for herself, and then Botan pulled a bunch of the wooden things from her back pocket and began passing them out.

"Now, I know most of us were raised Buddhist, so let me explain how this works," Botan said. She held up her coin. "Throw your coin into the offering box and clap your hands. Concentrate on the wish you want the most in the world, and the _kami_ spirits will wake up and listen to your prayers!" Then she held up the wooden thing. "These plaques are wishing plaques, or _ema_ boards. Write your wishes on them and hang them from the ropes. Clap and make your wish after you hang it, and the _kami_ will read your words, too!"

"Just try not to make a mess, or touch anything," Genkai said. We all looked at her; she appeared both smug and a bit worried. "I pulled a lot of favors to get us into this inner shrine, and trust me, we need all the luck we can get."

"Right you are!" Botan twittered. To demonstrate, she turned around and threw her coin into the box with gusto, and then she began clapping as though Tinkerbell were dying and Botan was the last believer in fairies left alive. Her face screwed up tight, cheeks reddening, and then she stopped clapping and drew in a deep gulp of air. She'd been holding her breath, it seemed.

One by one we all filed up to drop our coins into the box. Ren went first, mimicking Botan even though she probably didn't know what she was actually doing (it wasn't like she understood that much Japanese yet), and when she left the box and stared at her _ema_ board without knowing what to do with it… well, I walked over to her to give her instructions, but when she saw me she started walking away.

"You write your prayers on it!" I called after her, frustrated, and she looked over her shoulder long enough to give me an apologetic smile… but she didn't do anything more than that, and kept walking away from me.

I went up to the box with Hiei, who had waited for me as the others drifted off to hang their _ema_ boards. I threw in the coin with force and clapped my hands three times, but then I left them together as I would when making a Christian prayer. My eyes fell closed. Steadying my breathing, I slipped quietly into a meditative state and began to speak inside my head.

I'd never been too religious. My parents had made a few vague attempts to take me to church when I was younger, but it hadn't stuck with any of us. I guess it's not really a surprise that I didn't quite know how to pray, in that case, or even if I really believed that anyone greater than myself could hear me… so I just made sure I made my wishes loud enough for whatever was out there to pick up on.

_ Dear… Universe,_ I thought. _Please keep everyone safe. I know I'm not always the best person, and I know for sure I'm not the strongest—hell, I'm not even in the top fifty percent of either of those categories, but I try to keep my loved ones safe and I really wish… well, I really wish you'd just keep us _all_ safe. Just a little, maybe? I just think I deserve that much after all the crap I've gone through—not that I'm complaining or anything, because I'm not! I'm just saying that I think karma owes me a little, but I'm going to shut up now before I curse myself or something, because I totally would with my stupid luck. Uh, so… goodbye. I mean, Amen!_

I opened my eyes, but only enough to see out of my fringe of lowered lashes. I looked quietly around. Ren stood off to one side, alone, but she was scribbling slowly on her _ema_ board with a marker.

I quickly shut my eyes again._ Hi, um… it's me_, I wished._ I have one more request, and it's to please not let Ren be mad at me anymore. Alright. Well. Uh… Amen!_

My request having been taken care of, I turned to leave, but Hiei blocked my way. He stood next to me with his eyes wide open, coin in his hand, staring at the box in front of him without expression. When I turned his head twisted in my direction, and when I saw him—

I turned back to the box and shut my eyes, hands folding into one another as I prayed again.

_Me again_, I thought. _Sorry, this is the last time, I promise, but please, please, _please_ keep Hiei safe. I just want him to be happy, and please… don't let him react badly when I tell him about my period thing, because I think I'm going to no matter what Ren says. _

With the thought came certainty. Hiei had to know. He deserved to know.

_Just… let him be happy, _I thought._ That's all I really want when we get down to the nitty gritty, because… well, I think I love the bastard. I don't want him to get hurt, least of all by me, so… yeah. Thanks again for listening. Amen._

When I turned to Hiei that time, he wasn't holding his coin anymore. He was just looking at me.

* * *

Botan came over and gave me a pen, and so I wrote in big Japanese letters on my _ema_ board: "Please keep everyone safe." On the back of the board in smaller letters, in _English_ letters, I wrote: "Please let Hiei be happy. And if it will make him happy, please let me be able to have kids someday. Please don't let Ren stay mad at me, either, but most of all, just keep everyone safe. Please and thank you. Amen."

_ How does Hiei feel about kids?_ I wondered as I looked for a spot to hang my _ema_. _I'll have to ask him. _The idea made me smile a little._ Fanficcers the world over will be jealous!_

On a whim I went over to where Ren had been standing when I spotted her writing her _ema_, and on another whim I tried to find hers hanging there. _Surely it'll be easy to spot since it's the only one in English, right?_ I thought, but even though I looked for almost five minutes I couldn't find it. I hung mine up feeling dejected, wondering what she'd wished for, and I was so caught up in my thoughts that I almost missed the sight of Hiei hanging up his own _ema_.

"What did you wish for?" I asked as I handed him mine.

Instead of answering, he took the board and flipped it to the English side. With a frown he flipped it over to the Japanese words, and when he saw them his eyebrows shot up.

"Very selfless of you," he remarked with only a little sarcasm.

"The other side's a bit more about me," I confessed. I took it from him, held it up, and pointed at his name. "That's your name, by the way. Feel special."

He squinted to read it in the gloom, but beneath that he looked happy in a subtle-Hiei-sort-of-way. With a smirk he took the _ema_ back andplaced mine next to his, but I couldn't see what he'd written in the shadow. It looked like only two kanji and a few hiragana and katakana characters, but I couldn't quite make them out.

"So what did you write?" I asked again.

Hiei just shrugged.

* * *

Botan managed to get us seats right at the top of the steps leading to the shrine. We could look down and see the booths lining them like a row of weirdly asymmetrical dominoes, and if you looked a little harder, you could see the pavilion where Nobu and I played ever farther along. Botan explained that that's where the fireworks were being launched from, so we had a great view when darkness fell and they began to go off. People had laid blankets all down the steps and were lying out to watch the show, but since we were really high up, we had the best seats.

Ren sat on the opposite side of the group from me, of course. I kept sneaking glances at her as the fireworks lit us up with bright shouts of colored light, dyeing our faces blue and green and red and gold in turn. The scent of gunpowder made my nose tickle; every now and then I heard wind chimes beneath the booms and cracks and whistles of the fireworks. It was pretty music, music that became even prettier when the same trio—the trio of taiko, shamisen, and shakuhachi flute—struck up a chorus somewhere down below us.

Watching and listening could only entertain me for so long, however, since sitting still and not having anything to do with my hands had never been an easy task for me. Sitting still on the ground was even worse than sitting still in a chair in my case. Therefore, you can imagine that I was more than relieved to take Hiei up on his offer of getting up to walk around, especially when my bad leg had fallen asleep only a few minutes before.

No one noticed us walk off, but I was OK with that. I followed Hiei; he walked slowly so I could keep up, and soon we found ourselves back in the same garden from earlier. The temple loomed tall above us; unfortunately, we couldn't see the fireworks from that vantage point, and I said so aloud.

Hiei promptly pulled one of his famous grab-the-girl-and-leap-up-to-the-roof stunts. I let out a shriek before he managed to clap a hand over my mouth, and suddenly I found myself in Hiei's arms while he balanced precariously on the triangular roof's central support beam. It was like that one fight scene out of the movie _Mulan_, only I was nowhere near as brave as the titular character, and I will freely admit that I grabbed onto Hiei and buried my face in his coat so I wouldn't have to look around as he cat-walked down the beam and, with a sickening rush of air, placed me on the edge of the roof with my knees and calves hanging over the side. The beam was wide enough for us to sit next to one another with room to spare, but that didn't stop me from looping my arm through Hiei's and pressing my face into his bicep.

"I thought I said I never wanted you to do that again," I said, voice muffled by his leather sleeve. "Like, ever."

"Just trust me, idiot," he said in a soft voice, and with dread I peeked out from my hiding spot, only to gasp as a red pinwheel firework went off in the air before us. It stained the Christmas-light stars pink, blotting them out with its own brightness before letting them take over the inky black once more. The booths and the stairs were all lit up, a pathway of light leading to the place the fireworks sparked to life and birthed themselves in shower of sparks and smoke.

"This view is _awesome_!" I said, mouth gaping. "Oh my god, this is _amazing_!"

"Told you so," Hiei said.

"Shut it. No jumping without my permission."

We watched the fireworks in silence after that. I noticed after a few minutes that despite the chilly wind we had to bear as part of being up so high, I wasn't all that cold. Hiei radiated enough warm to keep me more than toasty; at one point I turned around and thank him for it.

"It's nothing," he said as he looked away… but then he slowly faced me instead of the fireworks. I knew what he was going to say before he said it. "What were you going to tell me?"

I didn't say anything, watching as the fireworks turned his skin to pale blue, then green, then red. The colors made his eyes flare different shades, the way a kaleidoscope takes the light and distorts it. Did he know how mesmerizing his eyes were? Did he?

I turned away. The fireworks boomed.

"I have a secret, Hiei," I said. Though I spoke softly, I was confident he'd hear. "I should have told you before we…" I shook my head. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything and I pray you don't reject me for this—that's what I prayed for you, know, for you to not reject me—"

"Dani."

I looked at him. His expression bore patience like a mantle.

"Just tell me," he said.

I faced the fireworks. This was it. I took a deep breath, cleansing myself in order to gather the courage to say: "I don't… I don't know if I'll be able to have…"

"Children?"

My spin straightened with a snap so harsh I felt my neck ache. Breath caught in my chest, unborn and unbearable. My vision tunneled; I saw nothing.

_What did he just—?_

"How, how did you—" I said with my heart beating high between my teeth. "How did—"

His reply came quietly and without any sort of judgment at all. "I've known since I saw your memories, Dani," Hiei said as gently as the fire demon could. "I thought you'd have figured that out by now."

I absorbed this. I absorbed the fact that Hiei had known all along that I was—that all my worry and agonizing, that my secret—

"You, you never said—" I stuttered.

He cut me off. "Why would I bring it up when it would only hurt you?" he asked. He hand, the one not connected to the arm I still had mine crooked around, reached across his body and rested gently on my knee.

"You… were protecting me?" I wondered.

"I was _trying_ to," he said. He sounded frustrated. "Seems like I failed."

I said nothing. He said nothing. Then:

"Has this been what's bothering you since last night?" he asked.

I nodded. What else could I do?

"I should have known," he muttered.

We sat there in silence, me trying to take it all in and Hiei waiting for me to react—and when I reacted by tearing up, well, he was significantly enough disturbed to grab me by the shoulders, spin me to face him, and ask in a very insistent and worried (for Hiei) voice: "Dani, what's _wrong_?"

I bawled a bit. The cold combined with my crying stopped up my nose, and then it made it run. "You picked me," I blubbered. "You picked me even though…!"

Hiei had the gall to roll his eyes, which only made me cry harder. "I picked you in spite of it, yes," he said.

I sniffed, trying to stop up my nose in vain. My question of "Why?" was barely intelligible through my snot.

He looked like he was about to reprimand me for asking a stupid question, but then he briefly shut his eyes. His expression cooled. When his eyes opened, he seemed calmer.

"Because it's _you_," he told me, sounding utterly sincere. "Why _else_?"

That was exactly the right thing for him to say, both to make me warm with sudden happiness and to make me cry all the harder. Hiei didn't like that, looking thoroughly alarmed as he once again grasped my shoulder and made me look at him.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" he demanded to know. "Shouldn't that make you _happy_?"

"I _am_ happy!" I wailed. "Can I _hug_ you?"

I didn't wait for a 'yes'—I just threw my arms around him hard enough to nearly send us pitching off the roof and into the night below.

* * *

"So… it doesn't bother you?"

I posed the question after I calmed down a bit. We sat close but not touching even though all I wanted was to cling to him again, but I had freaked him out more than a little with my theatrics and I wanted to prove I was (mostly) sane, and so I stayed away. The fireworks were still going on, and the moon had risen behind them. It was full, prettily enough, but all I really wanted to look at was Hiei—Hiei, who had picked me in spite of my body, Hiei, who had basically just proven to me that the guy I loved (it was becoming easier and easier to admit) was really and truly worth the effort of chasing after.

He stared at the fireworks for a few moments. I stared at him.

"I don't know if I even _want_ children," he finally said. "They seem messy." The bridge of his nose scrunched up when he frowned. "Messy and _loud_."

I giggled. Hiei scowled.

"But parents, especially human ones," he said after another long silence, "they seem… happy." His eyes darkened. "I don't know why."

"It's because they have someone to love," I said, not realizing how embarrassing those words were until after I said them. "And, um… yeah."

We watched the fireworks for a few moments. The stillness wasn't awkward, exactly, but… well. I had said too much, I guess.

"It's only a maybe, anyway," Hiei said, breaking the silence like a sheet of ice.

I frowned. "What is?"

"You not being able to have children," he said. He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. "I can work with a maybe."

My cheeks colored on reflex. Hiei smirked. Shyly, I reached and found his hand where it rested on the roof, and I curled my fingers around it. He squeezed back.

"Thank you," I said. "Thank you, Hiei."

He didn't say a word—and then, just when I was going to say more (maybe even more than Hiei might have been prepared for), I heard a thump and curse come from behind me. Hiei stood up so fast that he became little more than a black blur buzzing at my side; I had barely begun to turn my head when he disappeared altogether. The sound of something sliding down the roof's slick red tiles heralded the full turn of my head, where I saw a dark shape sliding down the roof in a boneless heap. Hiei flickered into being beside it, grabbed it, and then he flickered again with the shadow in tow and reappeared in front of me, somehow managing to keep his balance despite the slender young man who had an arm wrapped around Hiei's neck.

I didn't recognize him—at least, not a first. He had a long curtain of silky black hair and a pale, pointed face, and then I saw his uniform—

"He's on the SDF!" I blurted. Indeed, I recognized him as one of the SDF members Koenma had brought to the temple, and just as I made that connection I saw that the armor on his side had been ripped away in a huge gash, a gash that gushed blood over his hip and onto the fabric of his not-so-funny-now MC Hammer pants. "Hiei, he's _hurt_!"

Hiei's lips parted over his teeth in a silent growl. As I watched, his forehead began to glow bright violet behind his opaque headband. A moment passed; wind blew, setting my hair to flying as Hiei read the SDF man's mind, and then—

Hiei's eyes snapped open as the Jagan went dark.

"They're here," he said with no inflection, and his eyes focused over my shoulder.

It was all I could do to turn, search the sky, and gape at what I saw there. A dark pinpoint had appeared before the moon. I watched it grow until it looked like it had wings, _murky_ wings, wings wide enough to turn the moon to total black, and then the stars around it winked out, too, as a firework went off and hid the scene in a shower of bloody red coals.

_Seishou, _I thought.

From far below us, I heard someone scream.

* * *

NOTES:

_Oh holy shit—_

_ I think the countdown should be sort of obvious at this point… shit hits the fan at 0. Boo-yah?_

_ Sorry this took so long to get out. I had a very busy week at work, and on top of that, I totally forgot to write a crucial scene in this chapter and it took FOREVER to find the time to write it and fit it in. Then FFnet freaked out on me and I made cupcakes. Ugh. But, never fear, Sunday will see the next chapter on time and everything. HUZZAH. _

_ Oooh, Dani, look at you are your dramatics when Hiei already knows your silly secrets! And what's up with Ren and the 'loo' thing? And why didn't she want Dani to tell Hiei about not being able to have kids? It's all going to come together soon, so stay tuned (and both the locket and the prayers are important, I promise)._

_I forgot who, but someone remarked that Dani does a lot of interrupting people, so I gave her a taste of her own medicine in this chapter. Bahaha, I'm mean. Also, Dani is a freakin'-ugly cryer. Snot, blubbering, the works. _

_ The passed-out SDF guy is based on one of the ones that showed up to stop Yusuke in the anime. He's the only one with long black hair, so yeah, I guess he's not an OC?_

_ Many thanks to the readers of the previous chapter! Takara Rose Oizumi, chocolateluvr13, ShadowFireFox13, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Yoko Kiara14, DaAmazingMeepers, Wings of Silver Rain, Kaiya's Watergarden, MusicFiend666, NAO-chan33, Btch, Purple, PhantomXOfxMystery, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Miss Margret, Takara Taji, Angel of Randomosity, Supreme Baka, , Eggbert 3000, TeacupKitty, undercover prep, colbub, ephemeral violet, Caralirani, flamingmarsh, Tally Youngblood, How Could This Happen To Me, Kai-Chan94, Koryu Elric, Snowgirl7589, ThatOneChickkk, Captain LUPIN Ferus (every time I get that right I do a little dance), Ms Lilly, etowa-ru, spiritfoxxx821, OhhTaylorJade, Mneme and Hearts, AkaMizu-chan, Mindrail!_


	77. Chapter 77: Deathdealer's Descent

…0. Detonation. And so begins the end.

* * *

Future Talk

Chapter 77:

"Deathdealer's Descent"

* * *

Hiei spoke in my ear as I watched the shadow pass before the moon. "Ryu attacked the temple," he said, voice pitched low and tense. "The SDF held him and his followers off, but only barely. Now the Society is headed this way."

"And Seishou?" I asked. "Where did he… did he attack with Ryu? I thought they weren't working together anymore!"

My words were meant more for me than for Hiei, but Hiei didn't say anything—he was probably busy reading the SDF guy's mind, though that's just a guess since I didn't turn around to check. I only had eyes for the shadow on the moon, and as I waited and watched, Seishou…disappeared.

Another scream pierced the night, and then another, and then more. They came from below me, from somewhere along the steps, and when I diverted my attention to the firework watchers I saw that they were moving en masse, a stream of living bodies flowing down the stairs and away from the temple, because…

"Oh my god," I murmured. "Oh my _god_."

Only halfway down the stairs, I saw Seishou land. I could tell it was him because his dark cloak, the one that looked blacker than the soulless void even the Beasts called home, spread all around his feet in a shadowy puddle, staining the white-grey stairs the color of death. The crowd parted around him with a screech, diverting off to either side like cockroaches under a lamp. Even though the humans didn't know what this man was, what this man was _capable _of, they still did not go near him, not even when he began to slowly mount the stairs one step at a time, steel-masked face tilted up—

I felt the breath go out of me like I'd been punched in the gut.

He was looking our way.

Seishou…was here. It hadn't truly sunk in until that moment.

I only tore my eyes from him because Hiei wrapped an arm around my waist and jumped off the roof without a word. I didn't even screech, though—hell, I didn't even flinch. I was too busy trying to keep my eyes locked on Seishou as he marched slowly up the stairs in our direction, a feat that became impossible when I found myself standing with the others at the front doors of the shrine. We were the only ones around; the humans had long since fled at the sight of Seishou's descent. Even they could feel the intangible _something_ in the air that signaled the arrival of a predator, one that didn't care what it killed so long as it caught its final prey.

"Into the temple," Genkai said when she saw Hiei, myself, and the SDF guy. The others turned and saw us, too, and when they saw the man Hiei carried… well. Their already grave faces only turned even more pale, even more drawn, but they didn't say much as we all filed inside the temple's inner shrine.

Botan was the only one of us who didn't go in. She just said something to Genkai, summoned up her oar, and flew off into the night with her banner of blue hair streaming along with the wind.

"Koenma must know Seishou is here," Genkai said when she caught me eyeing the exchange."This could mean war."

* * *

It was quiet in the shrine—quiet and dark. The same candelabra as before burned around us as Hiei lay the SDF member on the ground, placed his hands across the pale man's chest, and made his Jagan glow with violet light. A moment later the guard's own eyes fluttered; a violet spark reflected in his iris before winking out.

Yukina came forward without being asked and placed her hands on the wound on his side, making it glow with pale blue energy as she stitched torn flesh, closed broken vessels, and quieted swelling. The man began to cough and grimace and moan as she worked, but then his breathing evened out when Yukina pulled her hands away and wiped the sweat from her brow. She helped him sit upright, and when he did he put his hands to his head. Then, after a moment, he looked up at us. His liquid black eyes were clear, purposeful, and agitated.

"My name is Minoru," he said in a low voice. "Koenma sent me. The temple has been attacked."

The entire room drew in a collective breath.

"By whom?" Kurama asked.

"Ryu and the Society." Minoru placed a hand on his side once-wounded, pulled it away, and stared at the blood on it with a curse. "I'm the fastest of the SDF. Koenma sent me to warn you that we repelled the Society, but they captured one of my comrades, Naoto. Ryu started torturing him right in front of us, asking—"

Minoru stopped. Then, slowly, he searched our number… until his gaze landed right on me.

"Ryu wanted to know where _you_ were," he said lowly. "And Naoto told him."

I forgot to breathe for a long, drawn out moment of shock mixed with rising dread. Hiei, who had come to stand at my side, gripped my elbow as if to keep me from flying away despite the fact I was frozen in my spot. Before I could find it in me to respond, Yusuke stepped forward and grabbed Minoru by the collar of his stupid uniform.

"You ratted us out?" Yusuke bellowed into Minoru's suddenly-scared face. "I oughtta rip out your—"

"Yusuke!"Genkai snapped. She grabbed him by the belt and pulled him away from Minoru with a tug. "There's no time for this! Seishou is on his way here!"

"I know that, hag!" Yusuke snapped.

Minoru cleared his throat. We all gave him our attention.

"The Society went after me, but I lost them," Minoru explained. "I thought I was in the clear until Seishou showed up and struck me." His hand wandered to his bloody side. "He was probably following Ryu in secret until he overheard where he could find the Bright Lady and… Dani, was it?"

I nodded. He smiled, though not with humor. Hiei's hand tightened slightly on my arm; I leaned into him because suddenly I was more scared than I think I'd ever been in my life, and that was including the Sioh incident and the time Seishou grabbed me through the windshield of the van.

"Our intelligence shows they're no longer working together, but that they both want people from _your_ group," Minoru continued. "We know Ryu wants the Book, too, but we have no idea was Seishou wants—apart from the Bright Lady, that is." He shot a rueful glance at his wound. "Seems all he wants at this point is the Bright Lady."

Everyone looked at Ren. Since she had no clue what was going on, all she could do was stand there awkwardly and look confused. It was sort of sad—she was the thing Seishou wanted most, and she didn't even know it.

I stepped forward on a whim. "Ren, Seishou and Ryu are both coming here," I told her. "Ryu attacked the temple to get the Book, but now he's on his way to us. You need to keep away from both of the bad guys, OK?" I added, as an afterthought: "We'll protect you. Just trust us."

Ren hesitated, but then she nodded and took a step closer to me. "Which guy is the one we just saw on the stairs?" she asked.

"Seishou,"I said. "And you need to keep away from _him_, especially."

She came forward and absently tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear; I could tell I was forgiven from her soft touch, but also from the look of fear in her eyes. She wouldn't show me that emotion unless she liked me again, that much I knew for sure.

"Seishou is after _you_, since you're the Bright Lady," I told her. I reached out and took her hand, giving it a light squeeze when her expression became even more alarmed. "We'll protect you, remember?"

The others had started ignoring Ren and I when we began talking in English, so I almost missed Minoru saying: "Koenma is sending half of the SDF down here to help take care of Ryu and Seishou, but the other half is going to stay to guard the Book and try to finish up the seal. We've been having problems with it; the Book is too strong, but Koenma thinks he's figured out a way to suppress its powers."

"He'd _better_ have," Genkai growled."If he wrecks my temple—"

She stopped talking. Slowly, Genkai pivoted to face the doors to the shrine—the huge ones that took three human men to open. Yusuke turned as well, walking forward to stand in front of the non-fighters like a half-demon shield, and then Kuwabara joined him, and then Kurama did, and then Hiei followed last of all with a long, pointed look at me. One by one we all turned to face the doors, even though I wasn't sure why the room had gone so tense, so quiet, so utterly still…

…but then the doors creaked open an inch, and I knew exactly what was happening. I grabbed Ren's hand and held it on reflex, pulling her behind me in a gesture of protection. To my free hand I began summoning the energy to form one of my high-pitched pink sound drills; I didn't know if I'd need it, but being prepared never hurt anyone, right?

"Dani, what's happening?" Ren whispered in my ear.

"He's coming," I said, and then the doors burst open. I flinched back, expecting him to charge in and try to take Ren—

… but nothing like that happened.

Beyond the doors lay darkness, the darkness of the windowless hallway that led to the room we occupied. I strained my eyes trying to see what dwelled within that gloom, but I didn't see anything at all—and then I realized that I didn't need to be using my eyes.

I could just use my ears.

Seishou walked with a steady, even pace, and each time his foot hit the floor I heard a jingling sound not unlike a metal spur hitting a wooden floor. Each step sounded like a silver gun going off; each step made me cringe back and away from the dark doorway; each step made the air in the shrine grow more and more tense. Yusuke began to mutter under his breath, a mantra of "c'mon, c'mon"accompanying his glowing index finger. He held the Spirit Gun at the ready at his side, wrist grasped in his other fist, so he could raise the weapon and fire it off in a millisecond if he had to.

He didn't fire, it though—not even when Seishou stepped into the vacillating circle of light cast by the candles in their holders.

I couldn't help but shudder at the sight of his mask. It just seemed so… inhuman. He looked bigger than a mere man, somehow, even though I knew from the Sisters'stories that Seishou was nothing more than a human being trapped ten thousand years in a cryogenic chamber. His ratty black cloak put the hallway behind him to shame; shadows clung to his body and the shroud that covered him from neck to toe, leaving only his masked face and head of floor-length black hair open to view. He walked forward with the shroud swirling liquidly around him, each step making that strange metallic sound I could only assume came from his shoes.

_Maybe they really do have spurs,_ I thought as he stopped only twenty or so yards away. _Was he a cowboy in America, or something?_

My attempt at humor didn't even make _me_ smile.

"Nice of you to show your face,"Yusuke said when Seishou stopped moving and just stood before us like death's specter. "Whoops! Did I say face? I meant mask. I'm sure your face is way too ugly to show in public."

A moment of silence met Yusuke's words.

Then:

"_Maggot_."

Keiko and Yukina both gasped. The boys standing before me all went as taut as bowstrings. The candles shuddered in their places; I shuddered in mine as well. The single whispered word seemed to emanate from Seishou's entire body, wrapping around my head like a snake bent on crushing the air from my lungs. True power echoed in his voice, made his words seem almost touchable, made me feel like there really were maggots crawling across every inch of my suddenly-clammy skin. I squeezed Ren's hand on reflex, looking for comfort, but then she squeezed my hand back with a gasp and I knew she had been left just as dumbstruck by that voice as I had been.

"Yeah, yeah, I've had worse,"Yusuke said snarkily. His voice barely sounded nervous at all. "Try to be more original, mm-'kay?" He recovered from the shock of the power-laden voice admirably enough; he certainly did better than I did, and from the way I felt Ren trembling against me when she suddenly wrapped an arm around my neck from behind, I got the feeling he had fared worlds better than my best friend.

"Be quiet," Seishou said in his thunderous whisper. Slowly, with cloth billowing about him like a storm cloud, he raised his right hand—a hand that was covered by a jointed metal glove that gave Seishou claws like some demonic vulture—and pointed it right at me.

"Give her to me," he said. "Give her to me, _now_!"

It took me until Ren's arm tightened around my throat to remember that he was after the Bright Lady, not me. _That's _Ryu_ who wants to kill me_, I reminded myself. _Not Seishou._

"Now, you see, we're not exactly in the habit of turning over our friends to the bad guys," Yusuke said. I heard more than saw the Spirit Gun round in his finger grow even stronger; it was like a high-pitched wail just at the edge of my hearing had suddenly gone up an octave. "If you want any of us, and I don't care who, then you're gonna have to come through _me_."

My palms got a little sweaty when Yusuke raised his hand. The flare on his fingertip began to grow, pulsing and throbbing as it sought to break away and rip Seishou—who stood staring at it without a word—apart.

"And I guarantee it won't be a picnic, dude," Yusuke said with a vicious grin.

Meanwhile, Kuwabara had walked right up to Yusuke's side. The Spirit Sword blossomed from his clenched fist, refracting rainbow lights around the neon gold blade in the center. It lit up the dark shrine in a way that, for a moment, made Seishou seem far less menacing. I couldn't help but feel a rush of gratitude for Kuwabara.

"He's right," Kuwabara said with all the valor in his massive heart."You're not getting any of us. So just give up and go home, freak-o."

Seishou's cloak rippled; somehow, I got the sense he was becoming agitated, and the feeling crystallized when he boomed: "I will not ask you again. Give me the Bright Lady!"

"Fat chance of that, jerk-wad,"Yusuke said.

Seishou said: "I will regret using force."

"Too fuckin' bad, fruitcake!"Yusuke said, and with triumph he yelled: "SPIRIT GUN!"

It bloomed out of Yusuke's hand like some sort of high-speed flower, rushing out toward Seishou almost too fast for me to follow, and it was so bright I had to shield my eyes with a cry. Seishou didn't even attempt to dodge the close-range shot; he just stood his ground. When the energy collided with him it flared brighter than a small sun, making everyone cry out and close their eyes as the gun beat back the dark. Seishou's darkness disappeared in the light, but I could still see it even behind my closed eyelids, and then—

The light faded with a sound like a roaring ocean.

I blinked, eyes streaming tears, and I looked around. Everyone was similarly trying to regain their eyesight, and then when I looked to see if Seishou was still standing—

"Well, fuck!" Yusuke said.

Seishou, looking tired but not beaten, sat crouched on the ground on one knee. His hair pooled atop his cloak, which lay in a dark lake around his body. I could tell he was breathing hard from the way his shoulders rose and fell—he breathed well, I noticed, using his diaphragm instead of his chest—and I knew he wasn't totally unfazed by Yusuke's attack given how his claw-gloved hands gripped the floor before him, gouging little furrows in the wood.

"First Hiei's Dragon, and now my Gun?" Yusuke griped. He tossed a look back over his shoulder. "Oi, Kurama! How 'bout you give your Rose Whip a little test?"

Kurama did not look amused, but he did reach into his hair and remove his trademarked rose.

"Shut up, detective," Hiei snapped. "And pay attention!"

His words were wise ones, because Seishou had started to rise. I watched with bated breath as his body surged upward, head bowed as if in prayer, and as he rose to his full height my gaze was pulled to his face behind the curtain of his hair, because something bright was moving behind it, slipping downward in a brief flash of candle-brightened motion, all silvery like liquid, and—

_Ching_!

The mask's round edge hit the ground first, making the thing try to roll until its uneven edge stopped it cold. It lay still on the floor, face-up, the black band that had held it to Seishou's head lying in twin rivers on either side of the cold, expressionless face. A crack bisected the mask's left eye socket, crossed the bridge of the nose, and slashed through the right corner of the molded mouth, and then, just as I took in the fact that _Seishou was not wearing his mask_, the thing split along the line and fell into two pieces.

Seishou raised his head. His hair parted, revealing his face.

Behind me, Ren whispered: "Lucien?"

* * *

There was no reason for Ren to say the name 'Lucien'. I had never known anyone named Lucien and Ren hardly knew anyone I hadn't interacted with, so how she thought she knew this guy's name was far beyond my guess. I mean, he certainly didn't _look_ like anyone I knew—and not just because he had unfamiliar, if not exotically handsome, features. No, despite his long, aquiline nose, pointed jaw, high cheekbones, and almond shaped eyes, he was utterly unlike anyone I had ever seen before in my life… mostly thanks to his scar.

It wasn't a scar from a wound, so far as I could tell. After all, it wasn't white, and it wasn't thin like a cut from a blade. Rather, the scar reminded me of the Phantom of the Opera's scar insofar as placement on the face went (I mean, it covered his left eye and part of his cheek but not much else), only this scar, unlike the Phantom's, hadn't warped Seishou's features into something ugly. No, his actual facial structure had been left untouched—it was just his skin that was discolored, turned bright flaming red like the heart of a lit coal.

It was a red, if I were to get technical about it, that looked very much like the color of my fingernails.

As I stood there, taking in the scar and its similarity to my own Salamander-induced mark, I felt Sweet stir inside of me as if waking from a long nap. She stretched, writhed, and then boiled as she called out to something I couldn't feel, desperately keening for… well, I had no idea. Sweet wouldn't listen to me long enough to tell me.

"What was that, Ren?" I asked as I fought to keep Sweet calm inside me. "What did you say?"

I tried to turn to turn to look at her when she didn't answer, but she suddenly was hugging me to her chest from behind, her face pressed into my hair and her hands twined tight into my clothes. I grabbed her wrists and tried to tug her away, but she didn't budge.

"Ren?"I asked softly. "Ren, what's wrong?"

Still pressing her face to my hair, Ren shook her head.

Meanwhile, the weird non-fight raged on. "If one shot didn't put you down, how 'bout another?" Yusuke said. He raised his hand; his finger began to glow.

Seishou raised his own hands in front of him, cupping the back of his left inside his right to brace the palm facing Yusuke.

Ren's arms around my body went slack.

_ "Wait!"_

One second she was embracing me, and the next she had shoved me behind her. I would have fallen had Yukina not stepped in behind me and propped my body up, and I'm sure I would have fallen over again from the sheer shock of it had she not been there a second later, because Ren was running at Yusuke and shoving his arm down while babbling for him to "Please stop, don't, you can't, _please_!"

Yusuke got the message; the Spirit Gun winked out of sight. He shoved Ren off of him and glared at her; Seishou slowly lowered his arms, a frown gracing his thin lips as his eyes darted between Ren and Yusuke in turn.

"What the hell, lady?" Yusuke snapped at Ren, but she just shook her head and turned her back on him so she could face Seishou. She stepped forward and held up her hands, reaching out to our mortal enemy as if willing him to step into her embrace. From behind I couldn't read her expression, but if I had to bet I would have placed money on her pleading with him with her big blue eyes.

"It's me," she said in her honeyed English. "It's _me_! Don't you remember me?"

His thin eyebrows dipped low, hooding his narrow eyes—eyes, I noticed, that were mismatched, because the white of the eye by his scar had been dyed the same red shade as my nails.

"You are the Bright Lady," Seishou hissed in English—English that was accented with Japanese, but was still unexpectedly, irrevocably English. His lips hardly moved when he spoke. "Do not speak to me as though you know me."

"But I do know you!" Ren protested. She smacked a hand to her chest. "Lucien, you're like a brother to me! Why can't you remember that?"

"What is she doing?" Genkai hissed. "Dani, what is that fool _doing_?"

"I don't know!" I said, because I didn't.

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Seishou said. He swept his claws at Ren, face contorting into an expression of rawest fury. His eyes roved over our group, wild and almost crazed, somehow. "Stop calling me that name! It is not mine!"

"Oh yes it is, Lucien!" she said, dancing backward and out of reach as her voice got a little angry. "We've been through hell together, me n' you, so I think I should damn well remember your name!"

"Ren, what are you talking about?" I blurted, feeling so numb that my throat seemed filled with word-stopping molasses. I stepped up to stand by Yusuke. "Get away from him! He's dangerous!"

Seishou's eyes flickered my way in annoyance. I shrank back. But, no matter how far I ducked, Ren's hand still found my elbow and yanked me to her side. Her face was resolute, like she wouldn't take anything but total remembrance from Seishou for an answer—not that I knew what question she was really asking, mind you, because at that point I was far too shocked to do any sort of clear thinking.

"If you don't remember me, then you should at least remember _her_!" she said. "C'mon, it's Dani!" Her hand came up and grabbed my chin, making sure I faced Seishou full on. "You can't say you don't remember _her_!"

The pressure of her fingers on my jaw made my brain click back into focus, and the first thing it focused on was the name she kept using—'Lucien'. Despite it sounding like something out of a cheesy romance novel, the kind I usually hate, it also began with a syllable I'd had on the brain all day.

Loo.

Loo-shen.

Lucien.

Was that what she had been trying to say when I told her I was in love with Hiei?

* * *

What happened next happened very, very quickly. Hell, it happened so fast that I barely even registered it was happening until it was almost over. One second Ren was trying to talk to Seishou like he was someone she knew, and the next I heard Keiko let out a harsh half-scream and I was falling headlong toward the floor. _Ren let go of me;_ that thought came as clear as day amid the confusion that accompanied me crashing down onto my right shoulder, _hard_, and as I lay there in stunned confusion something hit me on the top of the head, _harder_. White sparks made my vision disappear. When it came back, waving fuzzily into focus, I saw a piece of wood lying on the floor next to me.

_Wood?_ I thought dazedly, scalp stinging. _Why is there—?_

Sawdust drifted down atop the chunk of wood that had hit my head, and then another chunk hit my bad leg. I curled into a ball with a cry, dust puffing off of my jeans forcing my eyes to water suddenly, and then I felt arms around me and I saw Hiei's face for an instant before I was pulled against him and gathered up like a sack of grain. My head swam with the sudden motion; without truly seeing them, I saw lights, colors, sounds, glimpses of faces, faces that I didn't know surging through a hole in the ceiling with a tremendous crash and raised voices, someone tugging Ren's arm before she pulled away and ran into the shrine's darkness, all of those things rushed through my field of vision and then there was darkness that quickly tuned into half-light, and I was outside of the shrine with Hiei and the others and we were running down the steps, Yusuke tugging Keiko by the hand in front of Hiei holding me and Kuwabara ushering Yukina along like a love struck collie amid a hundred panicked humans.

_But Ren—where is—_

I started struggling in Hiei's grip so hard that he had to put me down; over his shoulder I glimpsed Kurama throwing up his hands, and then from the ground boiled thorned plants that barred the way from the crush of people chasing us. The Society poured out of the shrine and jammed together in a tight crowd behind Kurama's barrier; Genkai stood beside Kurama flinging orbs of bright blue spirit energy at the humans and demons alike who began hacking at the vine wall. She hit most of her targets, blood erupting from points of impact like spray at the seashore. Regular humans fighting to get away from the supernatural carnage surged around us, screaming and crying and threatening to sweep us away on their tide.

I hardly cared about getting swept away, though. All I could think of was—

"Where is Ren?" I demanded when my feet hit the steps.

Hiei's arm snaked out and caught my wrist to keep me from getting taken; his lips parted over his teeth. "The Society—" he began.

"Where the hell is Ren?" I screamed.

"Hey, look out—!"

The warning came from Kuwabara, but it came too late. A demon—one of the Society, I was sure of it—tore through Kurama's plants with a roar of black smoke and the flicker of fire around its hooved hands. The civilians around us broke out into a stampede, and the next thing I knew I felt an elbow in my gut and the crowd had swept me away. I caught a glimpse of Hiei's face as he fought through all the people, trying to get to me with fury and fear waging war in his eyes, but it was no use; he couldn't break through them without hurting them, and without him to keep me steady I found myself pressed between two bodies and was lifted almost two inches off the ground.

"Hiei!"I yelled, but then I heard another roar and I saw Kurama's barrier go up in flames. Yusuke let out a yell over the call of the people round me; I saw the Spirit Gun blast rocket over the crowd and collide with a large demon fighting its way through the bramble, but I didn't see the detective himself until he, Hiei, and Kuwabara joined Kurama at the base of the plant wall, fighting back the Society with everything they had.

I only saw that for a second, though, before bodies blocked my view. Desperate to get back to the others, I began to bite and claw and scratch (mostly metaphorically) my way out of the press of human forms, and as I did I felt something itch inside my skull. I welcomed the sensation with a tug and a pull of my own, beckoning Hiei's warm presence inside with relief.

_We have to hold them off,_ Hiei's voice said. _Stay out of sight. I'll find you when it's safe._

The thought of being alone amidst this chaos made me feel like a rabbit in a field of wolves even as the feeling of Hiei's mind on mine made me feel safer. _But, Hiei—_I thought as I elbowed my way through the people, trying to find a way to at least get out of the crowd I was so perfectly trapped in—and then, there!, my feet were on the ground again and I whacked someone across the back with my cane to get them to move—

_But nothing, Dani!_ Hiei snarled. _I can't take care of you right now! _

The prick to my pride made me fight all the harder against the people around me, and suddenly I found myself free, bursting from the edge of the throng with a cry. I stumbled into the small space between two of the festival booths, wedging deep into the dark crevice so I could watch humans spill by.

_ I don't need to be taken care of,_ I thought hotly, and I had the gratification of hearing Hiei chuckle.

_Good girl,_ he said (to which I responded with an incensed mental growl because I hated pet names). _Yukina and Keiko are trying to head back to the… vans, or whatever you call them. Find them. Stick together. _

_Not until I find Ren_, I thought back, and when I felt him begin to protest I thought: _She recognized Seishou, Hiei! _

_ She _what_?_

I pulled out the memory of her conversation with Seishou and threw it Hiei's way. I assume he relived it, because he soon growled: _What was she talking about?_

_I don't know!_ I thought. I peeked my head out of my little cubbyhole and snuck a glance at the boys, Genkai, and the Minoru of the SDF; I was far enough down the stairs to be able to look up at their battlefield at the top of the stairs. Hiei was slicing through someone's arm with a sword; I quickly shut my eyes and pulled back into my hole. _But that's why I have to find her. I have to find out what she knows about Seishou, Lucien, whoever he is, because what if they get together if I don't stop them? _

My eyes snapped open as something fell into place.

_Don't you see, Hiei? _I thought as dread and excitement waged well-matched war within me._ This is the link I was missing! _

_ What do you mean?_

I hesitated for only a second, and then I let the thoughts flow. _Ren and Seishou worked together in the past to summon the Beasts_, I told him, throwing caution to the wind and just letting him know what I thought I knew. _She existed in this world's past, and she worked with Seishou to end the world._

From Hiei came the general sense of disbelief. I pressed on regardless.

_That's what the other Koenma hinted, at least, but until now I couldn't figure out why the hell they'd ever work together. But, if they knew each other a long time ago, their relationship might be the answer to why they ended the world. If I let Ren go find Seishou on her own like I know she's doing right now_—

_ —she might end the world again._ Hiei finished my thought perfectly. Even though I could feel how he didn't quite know what to believe and that he was wondering if what I was just suddenly revealing could actually be true, I could feel the trust emanating off of him when he told me to _Go find her. We can't have her running off on her own if what you say is true_.

I would have asked if he'd seen where Ren had gone had I not heard the tremendous boom of someone's power going berserk. A chorus of screams had me clapping my hands over my ears, pained, but Hiei's voice cut through the din like a knife.

_Dani, I have to go,_ he said, desperation making his thoughts go fuzzy. _Be safe._

Then, as suddenly as he had come into my head, Hiei was gone.

* * *

I knew Seishou was close by long before I acutally saw him.

Well, Sweet knew he was nearby, at any rate. She started shivering and whining as I carefully picked my way down the festival stairs, sticking to the edges and the narrow alleys between the booths, and I shushed her more than once before getting annoyed enough to actually ask her what was wrong.

I asked her by going into a booth, behind the counter and everything, and crouching behind it to hide before slipping into theta. Once there, I let her guide me until I reached the place where I could see her. She shrank to her smaller size and curled around me, whimpering with pathetic little noises for me to comfort her, which I did by snaking my arms around her neck.

"What's wrong, baby?" I asked her as I stroked her eye-ridge. "C'mon, tell me. I need to get back to the real world."

Knowing that I was right, she pulled out a memory and shoved it into my mind's eye. For an instant I saw Seishou's lean face and wild gold eyes, but then the scene shifted and I felt Sweet keen brightly for something as a vision of a cave—a big one, big enough to hold the twenty full-grown Salamanders within it with room to spare—made my head feel cavernous. A sense of peace filled me as I watched the Salamanders play with one another, scattering boulders around the way puppies scatter tennis balls, but just as I began to really groove on the harmony of the scene, everything shifted. More Salamanders than I could count stood around the broken body of one of their kin, heads thrown back and mouths stretched wide as they screamed out their grief. I couldn't help but scream with them, but just as I really felt their sadness take me over, it all went away, and then the image of Seishou appeared again.

This time, the image was filled with echoes of that same grief... and anger.

Lots and lots of anger.

For a moment I thought it was Sweet who was angry, but then... no, it _wasn't_ Sweet, the anger was coming from _Seishou_... but at the same time it wasn't coming from him at all, but rather from a place _inside of_ but _separate _from the man himself—

I shook myself to clear Sweet's bizarre message. "Baby, I'm sorry, but what _was_ that?" I asked her. "I don't understand!"

Her eye rolled up in its socket to stare pleadingly at me. Obviously to her it was obvious, but to me...

"Sweet, I don't get it, OK?" I said. "Can you try to—"

I never got to finish my sentence, because Sweet's mental body tightened around mine so hard I thought she was going to break my spirit's ribs. I struggled to break free, confused at her sudden viciousness, but then Sweet was flinging me back toward consciousness with her power fueling my soul like a rocket, every fiber of her connection with me radiating her desire for me to _wake up, run, don't linger here any longer!_ I tried to claw my way back to her to see what was wrong, to figure out why she so vehemently wanted me to abandon our conversation and wake up, but she pushed at me with so much force that when I reentered my body, I literally had to gasp because I could still feel the pressure of her body coiled around my torso as it crushed the air from my lungs.

"Sweet?" I cried, forgetting that I was no longer face to face with her—and then I saw why she wanted me to wake up.

Seishou stood on the other side of the booth's counter, watching me.

* * *

NOTES:

_Sort of a short chapter, but I'm thinking of updating multiple times this week since I'll have a lot of free time; internship is over, yay! My laptop is currently busted, but we have a desktop here at Nana's house so it's not too big of a deal. And yes, I'm at Nana's house. Love that lady!_

_Oh holy shit, Ren, what in the world are you doing/thinking/hiding?_

_ And Dani, how dumb can you get, running off on your own like that even IF Hiei did tell you to go do it? Serves you right, getting cornered by the badguys! Gosh!_

_ Next chapter… we learn the truth. About a lot of things. But mostly about Ren and Dani and Seishou. Or should I say Lucien? Is Ren right in saying that she knows him? And where in the world is she, anyway? You'll find out next time for sure!_

_So, this thing really is coming to an end soon. Can't say how many chapters for sure, but it still makes me sad. _

_ Many thanks to last week's reviewers! Kaiya's Watergarden, HowCouldThisHappenToMe, Wings of Silver Rain, Caralirani, phantomxofxmystery, Kurai Masuyo, chocolateluvr13, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, Music Fiend666, lilmickey2008, Anon, Kai-Chan94, Koryu Elric, Angel of Randomosity, spiritfoxxx821, nevvy, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, Takara Rose Oizumi, colbub, eragon1228, flamingmarsh, Eryn Goddess of Chaos, Yoko Kiara14, Eggbert 3000, Tally Youngblood, cranberryben, j.d.y., Devonlizz, AkaMizu-chan, rain chant, darkravensnight, ShadowFireFox13, Captain Lupin Ferus (STILL EXCITED ABOUT THIS!), SC315-Enterprise!_


	78. Chapter 78: That's Not My Name

Future Talk

Chapter 78:

"That's Not My Name"

* * *

As much as it kills me to admit it... Seishou knocked me out.

It's predictable, really—the first time I actually have a mission all to myself, one that could very well spare the rest of my friends from a fate worse than death, I get knocked out and kidnapped only, like, five minutes after I get the mission in the first place. How the hell is that fair, I ask you?

Indeed, the thought "this isn't fair" was the first thing to pop out of my mouth upon seeing Seishou standing in front of me, and when I said it his eyes narrowed. The one with the red schlera seemed to flare bright crimson when he lifted a hand and reached for me, but rather than just let him run me over like some tragic deer caught in the headlights of fear (which I very much was on the inside) I jumped backward, groped around behind me, and chucked the first object my hand came into contact with straight at him.

The object in question just so happened to be a stuffed rabbit. A pink one. I was in a booth dedicated to tossing rings at bottles (yay, classic carnival games that transcend space-time barriers), and as Seishou batted the prize toy out of the air with a flick of his wrist I grabbed one of the bottles out of its cradle and threw that, too. It exploded when it came into contact with Seishou's metal claws, brilliant shards of glass raining over the booth's counter and the tops of my shoes. Some of the shards rocketed toward my face, one cutting me deeply on the cheek, but some of them flew at Seishou, too, and he had to raise his cloak over his face with a sweep of his arm to keep from being blinded.

I, meanwhile, latched onto the pain in my torn cheek and used it to quick-access theta state, from which I yanked a streamer of supersonic music. It collected in my palm with a wail; I readied it to throw as soon as I saw the white-and-red-and-gold of Seishou's eyes, lamenting that I didn't have my staff with me because my powers were pitifully weak without Sweet's bones to aid my focus.

From behind the barrier of his cloak, Seishou said: "Stop this."

The power of his voice froze my muscles solid. They tensed around my bones so tightly I felt they might snap. The ball of music in my palm flickered out with a bright green ping.

Seishou's arm dropped.

I don't know what happened then. One moment I was hyperaware of the screaming people and the running figures streaming behind Seishou down the stairs, of the scent of gunpowder lingering from the spent fireworks, the lights of the paper lanterns and the way they made the eyes of the fuzzy animals lining the booth's interior walls gleam like a dazzle of jewels suspended in animal-shaped settings... but then all of that faded. My vision tunneled in, narrowed down, came to rest irrevocably on Seishou as he captured my eyes with his and held them fast.

He truly was a beautiful man, I noticed for what felt like the first time. Though thin, his lips were sensual and well-shaped, and his eyes, those liquid gold eyes suspended in sunken, mysterious sockets above sculpted cheeks...

"Where is the Bright Lady?" he asked as I felt myself become ensnared by those eyes. If he was putting me under a spell, which I felt like he very much was, I hardly cared to even struggle.

"I thought she'd be with you," I told him. My words were honest, genuine, because those eyes, they were all I could focus on, I didn't have the power to lie...

"She isn't," Seishou said. "How does she know me?"

"I don't know. I was looking for her so I could ask."

"How do _you_ know me?"

"I _don't_ know you," I said.

The eyes I could not look away from went dangerously thin. "You're lying," Seishou said—but then his eyes went wide, then narrow again, and then... soft, somehow.

Like he had just seen something he'd been missing.

The next few moments passed as if in a dream. Slowly Seishou came forward until he bumped against the booth's counter, and then he braced one hand flat upon it. He leaned forward, tendrils of hair falling around his face as lifted his other hand toward me. The tall man's arm was long, and even though I took a breathless step backward and bumped against the display of prize stuffed animals, body sinking into a cushion of bunnies and ducks and plush dragons, he still managed to pluck a strand of hair from where my pigtails lay loose atop my chest. The hair looked frail, frail like spider web when he spun it gently between his bronze-clawed fingers.

"I think... I've dreamed of you," he said, twining my hair around and around his index finger. He looked mystified, but also excited when he looked at me and spoke, voice soft and, for once, almost human. "Who are you?"

"I'm nobody," I said.

Seishou's eyes went hard.

"No," he said. "You're not."

I barely even registered him tugging me forward by my hair. I let him draw me close enough for him to stand upright, my hips pressed against the counter, eyes locked on his face—

He wound his hands into my hair and slammed my head down on the counter in one motion.

I knew no more after that.

* * *

At first I thought the sound came from the taiko drum, the one I had seen played at the festival what felt like a millennia before. The deep, sonorous pounding beat quickly at first, running wild as though in pain, but then it slowed, slowed, slowed… and stopped.

Silence crushed my ears with a lion's roar.

* * *

I opened my eyes when I finally could.

I looked around.

I didn't know what was happening, but I knew that what I saw was, in a word, impossible.

"I know this place," I said as I surveyed what lay below my hovering feet. A bright silver ribbon bisected a plain on one side and a field of white on the other—a field of ice, I somehow knew, and behind me lay a dark forest. My gaze stayed locked on the river, though, and as I watched its glassy surface rush by I saw something dark flicker beneath the waves. A tentacle broke the surface, and then another followed; I waved my own hand in a small greeting.

"Hello, Sioh," I said to the monster, and I blinked.

* * *

When my eyes opened I was somewhere else, and someone was looking at me. The crone's hands were clenched around a wooden staff, and when I raised a hand in greeting she came forward and tried to place her hand on my shoulder.

Her hand went right through me.

We spent a moment regarding each other in silence—I knew I recognized the blue-grey skin with its darker navy wrinkles, the all-black eyes that somehow looked warm instead of scary, and the beads and feather woven into crow-black hair streaked through with grey, but it took me several labored seconds to realize I stared at the Grand Mother, who bore a look of shock and fear and pleasure on her face. I gazed back with just as much confusion as blind acceptance.

"Hello," I said when I realized who I looked at. "How are you?"

"Well," she said. She raised her hand and passed it through my shoulder again, a frown deepening her wrinkles. "How are you here?"

I didn't know, so I didn't answer. I just looked around, observing the inside of a small stone room. A fire burned in the center; pots and pans and bunches of herbs hung from the ceiling.

_I can't smell anything_, I realized as I looked at the herbs, which were surely pungent. _Why?_

"You… you've become more powerful, Sister Danielle."

I looked back at the Grand Mother in puzzlement. Her eyes were screwed up in thought, but when she saw my look she smiled.

"The change is not observable in terms of physical strength, nor even in spiritual strength. Those are as they were when last we spoke. However, something about you is indeed different," she explained. Her head tilted to the side in interest. "The tang of humanity you carried when we last met… it is gone, or almost so."

I expected to feel my heart start beating more quickly, but it did not. I looked down at my chest in consternation, but then I let my held breath go because, after all, I appeared to be having an out-of-body-experience and the lack of a heartbeat sort of made sense at the time. Plus, something told me I wasn't dead. If I was, wouldn't Koenma be here to tell me I'd failed, or wouldn't Botan sadly appear to tell me she needed to take me to the other side—or at the very least wouldn't I have stuck just a little bit closer to my corpse? Yusuke stayed near his body when he died in Yu Yu Hakusho, after all. I didn't think most ghosts had the power to jump from the Human Plane to the Demon World without a thought or care.

This was different from death. Much different. I didn't know what it was, but death wasn't the answer. I'd died before. I knew that much for sure.

The Grand Mother seemed to think I wasn't dead as well, since she promptly invited me to have a chat with her and most people don't ask ghosts to tea. "Whatever the means behind your visit, Sister, I would be honored should you choose to sit with me," she said, gesturing at the furs and blankets cast around the fire in a circle. "I am anxious to learn of your trip home. Is the Bright Lady safe?"

I didn't answer her with words—instead, I just stepped forward as if trapped in the grip of a fever-dream and reached up to touch the old demon's forehead with a fingertip. She blinked at me in confusion, but then my finger began to glow with a light the color of honey and the light sparked behind her nighttime eyes and lit them up from the inside.

I had no idea what I was doing, but at the same time, I was in total control when I pulled the memory of my trip home with Ren from the pits of my mind and gently trickled the images straight into the consciousness of the Grand Mother. I was also in full control when I let the memories continue to flow, picking and choosing the ones that didn't include the Future Koenma but still told the story of what Ren had gotten herself into since leaving the Sisters in Demon World—Ren telling me all about the history of America's destruction, Ren's mysterious powers, Ren revealing that she had struck a deal with the Book then reneged at the last minute, Ren telling me not to tell Hiei about possibly being barren, Ren growing angry at me when I told her about my feelings for Hiei, Ren fleeing after we saw Seishou's uncovered face and Ren crying out a name, the name Lucien, the name I was supposed to know just as well as she did, and then I sent the Grand Mother images of the Society's attack and more memories of who they were and what they wanted, and then I showed her the feeling of Sweet calling out to something inside of Seishou when he cornered me in the ring-toss booth—

I lowered my hand from the Grand Mother's skin when the last image (the one of Seishou's face staring at me with confused determination in his eyes) faded away. She stumbled back, gripping her chest in one hand while her breath came in harsh, short bursts. It took a few moments, but eventually she straightened up again and leveled a hard expression in my direction.

"I am glad to find the Bright Lady well," she said, voice shaky despite her solid stance. "And now, now I see what Hogosha…"

She turned away for a moment to collect herself. Then, slowly, she walked to the fire and stared into its flickering heart.

"The Bright Lady is in more danger than she knows, consorting with Seishou, the Dark One," she said. She looked over her shoulder at me. "I've already told you why, although you appear to not remember it."

My brow furrowed with a frown. What was she talking about?

"When I told you the story of the first Sister, Hinotama, and how she found the chamber of the Bright Ones, I told you about Seishou's origins as well," she said in response to my expression. "Of that tale, what do you remember?"

"Just that he was in a pod, like us," I said.

The Grand Mother's face darkened. She turned from me and gazed into the fire, as thought it could tell her where to go from here.

Where was here, anyway? The revelation of Seishou's name had thrown everything I thought I knew into instant disarray. Would the Grand Mother be able to restore any degree of order into my chaotic world?

I hoped so. I truly, truly did.

"You forgot one detail," the Grand Mother said into the fire, "but it is the most important of them all."

She turned so she cast herself into silhouette; I could not see her eyes, merely the way the light played over the feathers in her hair. Fire played with the edges of her body. She appeared to grow larger and then smaller in turn.

Her voice floated crisp and steady on the air like an autumn wind. "When Hinotama found the chamber of the Bright Ones," she said, "she found a Salamander preying upon them. She slew it, and it fell among the chrysalises, bathing one chamber in its white-hot blood."

Inside of me, Sweet sang a song of grief, and fear.

"That chamber," said the Grand Mother, "held the Dark One."

I forgot to breathe, then.

The Grand Mother put a hand to her face, covering her eye and cheek. "The contact with the blood scarred him much the way it did you when we gave you your rider's mark," she said, indicating Seishou's scarred visage, "and within him the Salamander's soul was bound, just as it was bound in yours."

Her hand dropped. When she inclined her regal head, the firelight somehow caught her eyes. They glowed out of the rest of her black silhouette like gems.

She said: "Seishou, like you, has the soul of one of the great beasts sleeping inside his skin."

Sweet had curled into a tight, miserable ball inside of me. I didn't know what to feel, other than a deep and abiding sense of unnamed dread, because what in the world did this mean? Sweet had given me power I could never have dreamed of getting on my own, so what did it mean that Seishou, thousands of years old and probably powerful in his own right, had the augmentation of a Salamander on his side?

"Can we beat him if that's true?" I heard myself ask, as if from far away.

"You and your partner can," the Grand Mother said. "I could. Any Sister with an ally could. For only Salamander can defeat Salamander when it is held so tightly in another soul."

My flesh crept atop my bones. "You mean, I have to kill…" The thought of killing another living being instantly repelled me; I held up my hands in supplication, hoping to hear the Grand Mother levy another, more palatable verdict. "But, I can't—"

"You can," came her even reply. "You and your Sweet, you must, if it comes down to it. The Salamander, like the Sisters, are fiercely female. I do not know what perversions a male mind might wreak on the Salamander simply as a side effect of Seishou's sex." She gestured at me, tone going from mystic to businesslike. "You say the Bright Lady is missing?"

I shook my head to reorient myself. I'd deal with this new information on Seishou later. "Yes, she is," I said. "And all my friends are busy fighting, so we can't go looking for her or anything." For what felt like the first time I let myself remember to be concerned for Ren. "I'm so worried," I confessed. "I need to find her, and soon. She doesn't know not to trust the Dark One, and since she knows him, I'm afraid she might not treat him like the enemy I know he must be."

She took in a deep, measured breath, then turned her head in profile. I saw her smile. "The barrier to the Human World was let down recently," she said. "Our sorcerers can reopen the rift. If you ask if of us, we will come to Human World aid your cause."

My stomach leapt into my throat, exhilarated. "You'd do that?"

She nodded. "My granddaughter's allegiance with those who wish you and the Bright Lady harm cannot go ignored. I wish to stop Hogosha and bring her home, for good, just as much as I wish to protect the Bright Lady. And I know my Sisters will rally behind me. They have been anxious to see the Lady alive and well." Her smile deepened even as it grew more grim. "We will ride to meet you and yours, should you have us."

I couldn't help but dip forward with a bow. "Thank you," I said. "Thank you so much. I—"

I stopped talking, frozen in a bowed position with my face lying parallel to the stone floor.

"Danielle?"

Because I felt something coming and because I knew—knew without knowing how—that my time was short, I said: "How long will it take you to get to Human World?"

"A few hours if we act quickly."

I swallowed, as if trying to choke down vomit _something is coming—_ "I'll come find you when you come through the barrier, Grand Mother."

I heard her take a step forward. "Danielle, are you—"

The world around me, the space inside me, the cavern of my soul… it pulsed.

* * *

I'm wary of saying that what happened then was the most painful thing I have ever experienced, mostly because I've gone through a lot of painful stuff and ranking each instance seems… silly, somehow. But, there was nothing silly about the pain of that moment. From everywhere—form inside, outside, _everywhere_—a harsh skyrocketing geyser of pulses erupted, pressing down on me from all sides as though trying to find their way into my body. It was as though as sound had become so loud that it shook the entire world, and then it _was_ inside my body, making my shell and soul alike resonate with pain that centered itself in the core of my innermost self, radiating outward in a vast, harsh wave.

I have no idea how much of my agony the Grand Mother saw, nor if she saw me react to it at all, because as soon as I started to writhe within the grip of that pain, the pain seemed to arch out of me even as it grabbed me tighter in its unrelenting fist. It pulled me away from where I was in a rush; my stomach seemed to drop out of my body as the pain coiled into a tight little ball where my heart should have been beating, and then, as the pain reached a fever pitch, my heart _did_ beat—it was as though the pain possessed it and forced it into beating, and as it started to pound and race within my chest I felt my lungs erupt with fire.

I was breathing, suddenly, starved for air and gasping, and I noticed that I was lying on something hard and that I was cold, and as I opened my mouth to gasp I felt something warm covering it, and—

My eyes opened.

From a distance of inches with his mouth pressed to mine, I saw Seishou hovering above me.

I reacted on instant, hands coming up to shove him away. I flipped over and onto my hands and knees, thinking to scramble as far from him as possible, but before I could move I began to cough and wretch and gasp. My heart beat frantically; I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me and my sternum was on fire. Every time I breathed and the cage of my chest expanded, a thousand tiny micro cracks of fire spread across my sternum like miniature rivers of magma. My still-sore heart was the core of that volcano.

"I hit you too hard," came Seishou's silken voice. "You stopped breathing."

As I fought for air, I processed his words (not that I really gave a crap about them; I'd almost died before and the prospect of a repeat performance wasn't too alarming) and tried to figure out just where the heck I was. Adrenaline had begun to pump me full of frantic energy. Looking down, I could see that I was lying on hard-packed dirt, and when I looked up—trees. Lots and lots of trees.

I didn't recognize a single one of them.

Slowly, I looked to my left and right. I saw more trees, and as I thought about getting to my feet, I realized I didn't know where my cane was. _He kidnapped me _and_ took my cane? What a jerk._ The thoughts came unbidden.

"Do not try to run," Seishou said from behind my back. "You won't get far."

As if on cue, movement between the trees caught my eye. Even though doing so hurt, I stopped breathing to watch the dogs—the dogs I'd seen Ryu summon at the party so many weeks before—slipping silently amid the trunks. Seeing them sent a jolt of panic through me, mostly because—

_Oh my god,_ I thought with eerie calm. _How did I not see this before?_

Despite the fact that they didn't have any eyes at all, despite the fact they were made of what looked like black slime, despite the fact that their bodies weren't endlessly long and coiled—the dogs held uncannily similarity to a certain creature with which I was very well acquainted. If you could look past the color to see the shape of their oval heads, long necks, and needle-sharp teeth… these dogs looked very much like small, compact Salamanders, forms corrupted by a mind not meant to hold them.

"Answer me truthfully this time," Seishou said. "Who are you, and how do you know me?"

The shiny-black-mini-dog-lizard-things melted into the shadows between the trees. I crawled forward until I could touch the base of one of the trees; I used it to pull myself upright. When I finally looked, I found that Seishou and I stood in a small clearing only a few yards wide. The moonlight and starlight lit it up in shades of silver and dark green. The red wound on Seishou's face appeared black, his eyes as dark as pitted coals.

"I told you, I don't know you," I spat. I was annoyed, in pain, and cold, and I had suddenly remembered that I had gotten kidnapped (_yet again_) and that that was a stupidly terrible, horribly embarrassing thing I would have to admit to Hiei at some point (granted I survived, of course). "Stop telling me I do!"

Seishou's face drew into itself, darkening with anger. He took a step toward me; I shrank back on reflex, but as he took another step I heard a howl come from somewhere to my right. Seishou cocked his head in that direction and scowled, but then his expression cleared into one of eager anticipation.

I fancied I saw madness itself gleaming in his eyes, but it was probably just a trick of the moon.

"We have a guest," he murmured in a roar. His booming voice almost trembled with suppressed excitement. "We have a guest I've been looking forward to meeting for thousands of years."

A shout went up; another howl followed it. Crashing sounds echoed out of the woods, getting closer and closer by the second, and then another shout, this time an intelligible one.

"Lemme go right now you mangy mutts, why I oughtta—"

My newly beating heart thudded, frozen into missing several beats and then making up for it with frenzied sprinting. My hands went slick with sweat despite the cold night air.

_They have her, _I thought._ They—_

Seishou smiled when a dog burst into the clearing. It bayed and howled and burbled, dancing on clawed paws as two of its brethren followed after it with growls and grunts. Ren stumbled between the two dogs, dodging one as it nipped at her heels, dodging the other as it took a snap at her hand. Bleeding wounds on her limbs, wounds I saw through the gashes in her jeans and jacket, indicated the dogs had done more than just snap at her on their journey here.

I couldn't help but feel anger when I saw how she had been treated, and when our eyes met—

"Dani!" Ren gasped. She turned and punched one of the dogs as hard as she could, then broke away from it and tried to dash in my direction. The other two dogs got in front of her; she skidded to a halt and tried to feint away from them, but soon they had her surrounded.

Seishou said: "Hold."

The dogs collapsed onto their bellies in the dirt. Ren looked at them, then at Seishou, and then at the dogs again before deciding they were worth walking past. She skirted the dogs (giving one a quick little kick in the stomach, to which it responded with a growl) and then slowly edged around Salamander-possessed psychic until she was near me; when she had successfully passed our literal and figurative guard dogs, she threw her arms around me and buried her face in my hair.

"Oh my god, Dan," she said, shoulders shuddering with the unburdening relief. "I was so worried!"

"Me too," I said. I returned her hug, cast a wary glance over her shoulder at Seishou, and whispered: "We need to get out of here. Get back to the others!"

Ren pushed away from me and tucked a bit of my hair behind my ear. When she did that, however, she froze, and her fingers were lifting to touch my hairline as her eyes went as wide as they could go. The tips of two fingers gently probed my skull; I winced, for the skin there was tender. Her hand lifted from my skin and came to hover between us.

The pale of her flesh was dark where she'd touched me. When she rubbed her fingers together, I smelled iron and salt.

Blood.

_Mine?_ I thought as Ren and I both stared at the stain. _From when Seishou hit my head on that counter?_

"He did this, didn't he?"

Her voice came low and soft. I gasped and looked up at her; she was glaring at me, though I knew the look in all its hardness wasn't meant for me personally.

"He's a villain, Ren," I told her.

But Ren shook her head. "No he ain't. And there's no excuse for—"

She let out a stream of curses, head tipped back to contemplate the sky. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it, hoping to comfort her, but the minute I touched her she jerked her face down to me. Her lips had thinned into a hard line; blue eyes seemed to glow silver in the dark.

"There's no excuse," she repeated, eyes on silver fire, and before I could ask what she meant she whirled away. She took two steps toward Seishou and planted her feet firmly in the dirt, hand coming up to point straight at the psychic's face. She was little more than a few feet from him. Her hand came dangerously close to brushing the front of his cloak.

"Hey, Lucien," she said. "You've got some explaining to do."

Seishou stared at her with disdain mixed with anger and… desire, it seemed like.

"As do you, Bright Lady," he sneered in English. "You are—"

"_Shut the fuck up, you piece of turncoat filth!"_

Seishou, to my surprise, actually pulled back at the sound of Ren's hissed warning. I felt my jaw drop a little at that, stunned as much at his reaction as I was at the vehemence of Ren's command.

Though her back was to me, I could tell from the set of her shoulders that she was pissed. "You show up and terrorize all those decent folks at the festival," she said in a slow voice, a voice shaky with suppressed emotion, "and I hear you've been terrorizin' a whole race of folks for hundreds of years, and now you send a bunch o' slimy dogs after me, rough me up, and to top it all off, you rough up _Dani_, too?"

Seishou looked like he didn't quite know what to do. He stared at Ren the way a hawk stares at a mouse who has actually decided to fight back—with wariness mixed with haughty confusion. Ren took a step toward his as if sensing this weakness.

"And now you act like I'm some Bright Lady or whatever, when you know damn well that that ain't who I am," she said. She smacked a hand to the flat of her chest, over her heart. "You know me better n' anyone, you big palooka. Lucien, it breaks my pea-pickin' heart to—"

He seemed to snap out of some sort of trance. "That's not my name!" he hissed, emotion igniting behind his eyes. "Stop calling me that!"

"What, _Lucien_?" Ren asked viciously. "But it _is_ your name! Lucien DeFoe _is_ your name! Why would I call you anythin' else but that, huh?" She put her hand to her jaw in a mockery of discovery. "Oh! But you refuse to call me by my name, too! I'm sensin' some sort of trend!" The hand (and the act) dropped. "So I guess this is some sort of sick, demented game you're playin'? Are you enjoyin' roughin' everyone up? Huh? _Are you_?"

"This is no game!" Seishou growled.

"Then what is it?" Ren demanded. I wanted to stop her when she marched right up to Seishou and grabbed the front of his cloak in her hands, but I couldn't get to her in time and Seishou only reacted by staring at her in frozen rage. "What is it, you refusin' to recognize me, to recognize _Dani_, to hurt us both when we're nothin' but family to you!"

Something struck a chord within him. Seishou shoved Ren back; she fell, and he roared: "I have no family, damn you!" The air around him began to waver and shake as if superheated; a blast of hot air buffeted my face and made my eyes water. "You and your kind took them from me!"

Ren scrambled back up. "What a load of horse shit!" she screeched. "What a load! Me n' _my_ kind? Did your brain rot in your pod? You know damn well we're of the same 'kind', Lucien!"

"You lie!" Seishou screamed. His mouth opened to the widest, cheeks stretching, eyes blazing, spittle flying from his handsome mouth. "The Bright Ones took my wife and my child and they _killed them! I am not a Bright One!"_

Ren froze. I froze. Seishou breathed like a locomotive, teeth grinding together so hard I could hear it even from where I stood.

Quietly, Ren repeated: "Horse shit."

Seishou's eyes flickered to her. In an instant he shot forward and grabbed her by her upper arms, fingers clenching so hard Ren cried out in pain.

My Ren. My brave, indomitable Ren—I'd never heard her make that sound before.

"I know what happened," Seishou hissed into Ren's face. "I know what I saw! I saw them take my wife and strip her of our child, and then they took her in her grief and—"

I don't know how Ren did it, but with a wriggle and a twist she had pulled one arm out of Seishou's grasp and was slapping him across the face. My hands came up to cover my mouth; Seishou's hand came up and punched Ren square on her strong jaw. She collapsed to the ground and lay there, crumpled, with Seishou standing over her. He let out a wordless screech and kicked my best friend in the ribs; at that I couldn't resist the urge to go to her, but I took one step and could go no further without my cane.

"Ren!" I cried out, on my knees in the dirt. "Ren, Ren, are you—"

"…fuck you, Lucien."

I stopped calling. Lucien stared down at Ren as if he could catch her on fire with a glance. She glared up at him, one hand clamped tight to her jaw.

"You know," she said, "that that's not what happened." She barked out a clap of humorless laughter. "You know how hard of a time that was, for all of us! You know what we were all going through." She looked at the ground, pained. "Even if you don't remember, you should know on the inside." Her eyes flared aquamarine when she looked back up at Seishou. "Stop acting like a selfish little brat and actually think about what you're saying!"

I had thought Seishou couldn't get any madder, but he did. His voice nearly peeled my skin off when he started to say, _"How dare you—"_

"I dare because what you're saying isn't true, dammit!" Ren interjected. She surged to her feet and shoved Seishou in the chest. "The part about your child might be, yeah, but you were in on that and the part about your wife, well, that's _just, plain, malarkey_!"

Seishou gaped at her. I gaped at them both. Seishou managed to say, voice unsteady: "What… do you mean?"

"I mean t' say that your wife is alive," Ren said. She kept her tone perfectly even. "You've seen her. You've _spoken_ with her!"

This idea was too much for Seishou. "You lie!" he said, grabbing Ren by the collar of her coat as if to pull the truth from her. Metal-tipped fingers tore through the material like it was paper. "You lie, and I will not—"

"I'd _never_ lie about this," Ren said. She didn't try to get away from Seishou; the fight had gone out of her. "There ain't a soul alive who knows that what I say is true better 'n me, because guess what, Lucien?"

She reached up and clapped her hand to his shoulder, a gesture of firm camaraderie. He did a double-take at the hand before looking back to Ren, who was staring at him with all the compassion in the world.

"Even if you can't remember anything," she assured him, "_I can_."

Her words, her tone, her posture—they booked no room for argument. It's hard to disbelieve Ren when she puts her whole heart into something. For better or for worse, in that moment Ren truly believed what she was saying; I knew that like I knew my own name, and Seishou appeared to know it, too.

He asked: "What do you remember?"

Ren smiled with heartbreak and recalled joy. "I can remember that I walked your wife down the aisle," she said, "because her daddy wasn't alive to do it himself." Her lips quivered even as she tried valiantly to grin. "I remember that I gave your wife away to you, you bastard, and I know that you've met her because she's standing right there."

* * *

NOTES:

_I, uh… I know it's short, but… uh…_

…_don't kill me?_

_WHOOPS, CAT'S OUTTA DA BAG, GUESS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT._

_I probably won the typo award with this chapter. Super sorry for the wait and the shortness. Details of my disappearance are available on my blog-thing, so I won't bore you by whining about them on here, ha ha. I finally had a little time to write fanfic and boy was this hard to get out. Hope you enjoyed! I'm thinking the next chapter won't take, uh, months to produce. (*fingers crossed*) Thanks so much to those who read me despite my (many, varied, and oh-so-very-obvious) shortcomings! .kuro, Koryu Elric, moani-sama, , nevvy, TeacupKitty, Angel of Randomosity, MysticChaos, Kaiya's Watergarden, HowCouldThisHappenToMe, darkravensnight, chocolateluvr13, AkaMizu-chan, Takara Rose Oizumi, Eggbert 3000, MikaUchiha666, Willowleaf2560, DaAmazingMeepers, OhhTaylorJade, TallyYoungblood, flamingmarsh, Caralirani, Kai-chan94, Captain Lupin Ferus, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, spiritfoxxx821, Yoko Kiara 14, x-Beyond-B, Snowgirl7589, ShadowFireFox13, angelbeets, Thread Magic, Katt Jeane, , insidious bunny, Takara Taji, jennyz, Ry171819, NecroMancer1984, And There Was Silence, SultanaV, XxX, Silvereyes25, Obvious Pseudonym, octoberbird, ThatOnechickkk, Tornado Aria, Sofia Remus, SC315-Enterprise, Of Lost Thoughts, Kushiel's Fallen, JazyXIII, Ic3Yuki, Emerald Gaze, thesilvereyesdragon, AbyssTales, LogicOfFire, Dragons redemption, PurplePurplePurple, and J.C Jackals! _


	79. Chapter 79: Say It

Future Talk

Chapter 79:

"So Happy (Say It)"

* * *

There are moments in time when you feel like everything around you simply goes away. These are moments when the feel of the clothes against your skin disappears, the voices of the people around you fade, and the ground seems to fall out from beneath your feet. Instead of the press of external sensation, your entire being focuses in on the beat of your heart and the rasp of air in your lungs. Your limbs tingle. Your mouth goes dry. The air buffets at your eardrums and eyeballs but you can't so much as blink to clear the cobwebs because everything inside of you—every doubt, every assurance, every insecurity, every confidence—becomes sucked into a vacuum of pure nothing. This sense of nothing and of emptiness is the embodiment of the deepest kind of shock, the kind of shock you only feel when someone voices a possibility so outlandish, so unexpected, you can do nothing more than merely stare in blank, open, unfeeling confusion.

The first time I experienced a shock that deep, I was very young. It was my first day of school as well as my first exposure to the reality of the cruelty of children. My mother escorted me into my classroom by the hand; I remember feeling excited by the colorful posters on the walls and the toys in their ordered boxes, and also for our teacher, who was young and chubby and kind. I was the first one there that morning. The teacher showed me to my desk herself, and when Mom told me she was leaving I barely felt homesick for her at all. I was distracted by my new school supplies, my teacher, and the sensation of anticipatory happiness at the thought of making new friends. After all, both my teacher and my mother had expressed the idea that as soon as other the kids arrived, we'd all be as thick as thieves.

Of course, they were wrong.

My left leg was almost half as short as my right when I was born. From birth on, I wore a series of large metals boot on that leg. The hope was that these boots would lengthen and strengthen my damaged limb; a complicated assortment of gears turned in infinitesimally slow increments, stretching out my leg day by day. For years these boots had platforms on the bottom so I could walk on legs of equal length, and while the end result was a positive one in my case, the boots themselves were hard to look at as something other than symbols of negativity. They were bulky, these boots. They were shiny and heavy and they squeaked when I moved. Overlooking them would be to overlook a person's nose. They were plain and apparent and impossible to hide.

From almost the minute my classmates started to arrive, I knew something wasn't right. Each child would look at not me, but at my leg—their eyes would linger on it before they could be distracted by a parent or our teacher, who would take their hands and lead them to their seats, all while those kids shot my leg glances over their shoulders and tried to whisper questions to their parents. I tried smiling at them to show I was friendly, but few were able to look away from my leg.

I had never faced that before. Though I didn't know it at the time, I'd later recall how my mother and father hardly ever had me play with other kids before I started kindergarten. Going out in public, I had always been cloistered in their sheltering presence. When people stared they'd distract me, turn my attention in another direction, but that morning at school, I didn't have anyone to perform that service.

I was alone. Bare. Vulnerable. I felt self conscious for the first time in my life, and I had no idea what to do with that feeling.

When a girl sat in her assigned seat to my left, I tried to act like I didn't feel spotlit at all. I turned to her when her parents left and said: "Hello. I'm Dani. What's your name?"

Eyes on my leg, she said: "I didn't know robots could talk."

The world around me fell away.

* * *

Ren had her back to me when she implied that Seishou and I had once been married—and I'm assuming she meant it had been me he had been married to, because not only was I the only other person present, as soon as she said it a whole slew of things fell into place. Seishou claiming to somehow know me, Ren's reluctance to talk about the past, Ren telling me not to tell Hiei I was barren because apparently _my doppelganger had been pregnant at some point—_

I stared at the nape of her neck, at the way her blonde hair looked silver in the moon and starlight, and as I stared I felt as though the world became bleached out by the light of my own disbelief.

Suddenly, some of the outside world returned. I felt eyes on me. My breath rasped when I looked up and met Seishou's gaze over Ren's shoulder. He stared at me with equal parts horror and confusion and strict, unyielding denial, but as we exchanged looks his expression changed. His voice, when he spoke, sounded almost human, like a lost human child begging and pleading for someone to show him the way home.

"But… they killed her," Seishou all but whispered, and Ren's hand tightened on his shoulder.

"No they didn't," she said. "The world looked like it was going to end and the two of you had a choice…"

She trailed off, and that was when she turned back to me. Her eyes were full of apology mixed with hope and shame.

Word hissed out of my mouth at the sight of her eyes: "Explain yourself!"

Ren recoiled. Seishou stared. I limped a step forward and felt my teeth grind together; my vision was tunneling, my hands were shaking, but all I could think was—

_There was a child?_

"Explain yourself, Ren," I croaked. "Explain yourself, right now."

She faltered, mouth moving under desperate eyes, but she said nothing.

"Ren."

"Dani, it's such a long story," she said.

"Ren!" I screeched, and I tried to lunge at her but my legs couldn't support me. I collapsed to my knees in the dirt. A flash later Ren was trying to pull me into her arms, but I fought her off and grabbed the collar of her jacket in both hands and pulled her face to my level. The only emotion on her face was shame.

"Ren, you have to start talking or so help me—" I babbled. "There was a child, Ren? A child? And you never thought to tell me about it!"

Ren said nothing. I'm pretty sure spit flew from my mouth as I spoke, without heed for volume control or sense.

"I was a mother, Ren!" I shrieked in her face. "And you let me go on believing that I might never be able to—"

"Dani, please—" Ren gasped. She put her hands on my wrists and tried to pry me off, but I held fast and tried to shake the answer out of her.

Seishou, behind her, stared on with wide eyes and a frozen body. He made no move to intervene, but I noticed vaguely when he jerked his head to the side and looked sharply into the trees.

I paid him no heed. I just kept yelling at Ren. "Tell me everything you know!"

"Dani, I don't how!" she pleaded. "There's just so much to say, and I ain't like you, I can't use words good—"

"EXPLAIN YOURSELF!" I screamed at Ren. "Explain yourself right now!"

"Why not just show them, yourself?"

My world froze, because I knew that voice. Ren whipped her head toward the source of the words. Mine slowly followed suit, and when I saw him my hands spasmed in fear and let Ren go.

Ryu stood between two trees. A scrape above his eyebrow oozed blood and the hem of his leather jacket had been torn out, but otherwise he appeared unscathed. Some of his hair had escaped the confines of the gel he'd used to slick it back, falling to shadow his sunken cheeks. Lilac eyes glowed brightly in the dark.

Seishou was the first to speak to the newcomer, and he simply said his name: "Ryu." His tone had gone back to its usual booming nature and his face had smoothed into blank emotionlessness.

"Seishou," Ryu said. He nodded in greeting, lips curling back over his teeth in as much a grimace as the expression was a grin. "Or should I say, Lucien?"

Seishou's eyes narrowed. "What do you want?"

Ryu shrugged and took a step into the clearing. He stood with his feet shoulder width apart, confident but relaxed… like he didn't feel threatened by his present company in the slightest.

"There's not much you _can_ offer me, at this point," he said. He sounded apologetic at first, but then he smoothly added: "Dani will do, though."

I swallowed, but Ryu didn't so much as glance in my direction. Ren moved in front of me like a human shield; I grabbed her hand and laced our fingers together. Ren squeezed my hand in comfort, but I wasn't holding her for that. I just wanted to make sure she couldn't get away before telling me the truth.

Seishou said with equal mellifluousness, like he had no tie to me at all: "Why do you want her?"

To my surprise, Ryu actually chuckled. He slicked a hand through his hair and licked his lips, contemplating the sky for a moment before shooting Seishou a wry—but winning—smile.

"Well, it's like this," he said, holding out his hands and gesticulating. "You and I teamed up because you wanted the Bright Lady—" he indicated Ren with a wave "—but you couldn't get her without me—" he put his hand on his chest "—and I wanted the Book, but I couldn't get it without you." He pointed at Seishou, then shrugged. "Seemed like a solid enough match at the time, but you were smart, Seishou." Ryu laughed and pointed at a few times Seishou, hand bobbing like a cork in the sea. "If you couldn't get the Bright Lady, you were more than content to settle for my Book as a last resort; didn't matter what happened to me. I was just collateral damage."

Seishou didn't move to deny this. Ryu kept on talking.

"But I was smart, too," he said. "I might not have cared about the Bright Lady herself, but seeing those Sisters get what they deserved…" He chuckled and made a noise like he had just bitten into a delicious hamburger. "You can't put a price on that."

Seishou, again, said nothing, but I sharply sucked in a lungful of air. The Sisters—I'd invited them here. Were they in danger with Ryu so close, and more importantly, when and where were they going to come into Human World? I'd said I'd meet them!

Ryu's voice interrupted my train of thought. He was still addressing Seishou. "We both played each other to get what we wanted," he said, "and you got your end of the deal. But, I still haven't had mine." He grinned, and then his eyes slid over to me.

Despite my heavy coat, I felt very cold.

"You have something I need," he said, and he smiled.

"Do I?" Seishou asked.

Ryu looked back at him; I could breathe again. "The way I see it, you have the Bright Lady," he said. "You don't want the Book. I don't give rat's ass about what happens to the Bright Lady, but I _do_ still want the Book. And I need Dani to get it."

"Why is that?" Seishou asked.

Ryu grinned. "Koenma has the temple protected under some very tricky barrier magic. I'm having trouble breaking it, but I think that if I had a hostage…" Those eyes slid my way again. "Dani will do. She and I are due for a little talk, anyway."

_Hostage_. My body prickled; I didn't like that idea at all. _How do I get out of this? I can blast Ryu with sound magic, grab Ren, then—_

Luckily for me, Seishou appeared to have the same sentiments. He said: "I'm not letting either of these women out of my sight until I hear the Lady speak."

That got a shrug out of Ryu. "Fine by me," he said, which surprised me. "I have some time to spare. Not much, but… some." A smile failed to light up his eyes. "If you let me help, this will only take a few seconds."

"What would you have us do?" Seishou asked after a brief pause. His voice was colored with suspicion, and a hardness I didn't understand.

"Just a sharing of memory," Ryu said. "I'm a psychic. This is what I do."

Seishou looked contemplative for a moment, and then he opened his mouth to reply. Ryu, however, held up a hand to stop him cold.

"Before I make it happen—we have to make a deal." Purple eyes glittered. "I show you what the Lady claims she knows, and you give me Dani. I'll never bother you again."

Ren let out a gasp and held onto my hand even tighter. I found myself torn, suddenly, between not wanting to have anything to do with Ryu and wanting desperately to know whatever it was Ren knew. A part of me started urging Seishou to agree to Ryu's terms, but was learning the truth worth being handed over like some worthless bargaining chip?

A ray of clarity broke through my emotional cloud when Ren squeezed my fingers again. Looking up at her, I remembered what Seishou was after. I remembered why he needed Ren. The realization was as clear as it was unexpected.

_No, _I thought._ No, no way. I'm going to fight tooth and nail if Seishou agrees. Knowing the truth isn't worth getting separated from Ren. She's the key to Seishou's plans, and the Machine, and everything. If I let her get taken, screw the Beasts—they won't have a world to destroy!_

Ren had an inverted idea, but the principal of it was the same. She shot a whisper over her shoulder: "No way am I letting anyone get you away from me!"

Seishou seemed oblivious to our thoughts on the matter, of course. "And should the Lady reveal information that makes… Dani, relevant to my cause?" he asked in a silky voice.

Ryu only shrugged at the possibility. "Tough luck, I guess. I don't deal in hypotheticals."

Seishou said: "Then we don't have deal."

"You can't just use Dani as a bargaining chip!" Ren shouted.

As one, Ryu and Seishou turned to her and snapped: "We can."

I lurched around to stand at Ren's side, leaning on her shoulder while she wrapped a supportive arm around my waist. "It doesn't matter what either of you want," I said, using all my vocal training to sound as powerful and commanding as I could. "Ren and I will fight back, together."

Ren beamed down at me, the tension between us over her memories momentarily forgotten. I smiled back, trying to think clearly. What I wanted mattered less than the bigger picture. I wasn't going to screw this up because I wanted to know what happened to my double in a past that wasn't even mine… even if it would, possibly, change my world in a wonderful way for knowing. Keeping this world safe mattered so much more.

Ryu's next words, however, almost made me forget that much. To Seishou he said: "I have another deal in mind. I share the Lady's memories, we deal with the consequences, and if our objectives conflict…" He shot the other man a roguish smile. "Well, you've given me more than enough incentive to kill you already, so what's the harm in a decisive battle between men?"

Seishou didn't say anything for a second, but then his eyes narrowed when he smiled. It was a wolfish smile, one that sent chills racing up my back. Next to me I felt Ren shudder. "Why did they even try to make a deal in the first place?" I heard her mutter.

Meanwhile, Seishou was saying: "Wasting energy in this pathetic scenario would be utterly imbecilic, when Koenma's operatives pose much greater threat to my ultimate goal. Let us see if we can reach some agreement without bloodshed. If we can't, we'll fight. "

Ryu laughed aloud. "I like it." He looked to me and Ren. "You two, come here."

Neither of us moved, at one with the thought that we just wanted to get away. When we didn't comply with Ryu's wishes, he sighed, shoulders slumping, and then—he flickered, kind of in the same fashion Hiei flickered before disappearing and reappearing—

"Ren, watch out!"

The words tore themselves from my mouth because, somehow, I knew that Ryu would reappear standing in front of Ren within a second, which he did before Ren could react to my exclamation. Her mouth opened and her hands came up as if she were going to both push and shout Ryu away, but then her eyes widened and she did nothing because Ryu had raised two fingers and had pressed them to Ren's forehead. A blinding flash of white light made me cry out in pain and shut my eyes, but I resisted the urge to cradle my head in my hands and instead fought to see what had happened to Ren. I groped for her blindly, tears streaming down my cheeks, blinking the way a hummingbird flies, and when I heard her moan in pain I forced myself to see through a gauze of bright pinpricks of light and raw pain.

All I saw was Ryu standing before me, upheld fingers glowing with the pale green light of Ren's energy. The hand darted out and jabbed at my face; I felt a coolness suffuse my forehead, and then my mind, and suddenly the world and the pain and the sight of Ryu's grin—all of it faded away.

Through the lens of Ren's memories, I bore witness to the past.

* * *

Even though Ren was busy, she answered the call because it was my mom, who was pretty much Ren's mom by extension, and Ren knew my mother wouldn't be calling her at midnight for no reason. Ren waved the HoloBook she'd been working with into sleep mode and said: "Show caller."

The face of the wristwatch she wore on her left arm lit up blue. Even though the watch looked like a standard men's Rolex, I knew because I was inside Ren's head that the timepiece was far from ordinary. Somehow I knew that Ren had made modifications to it herself, and that the innocuous object held far more inside than mere metal gears. She held it out in front of her; I watched through Ren's eyes as particles of light gathered above the pale glow and slowly coalesced into the shape of someone's torso.

My _mother's_ torso.

Ren and I both knew something was wrong the second Mom appeared. Even shaded in washed-out blue and shining with the internal light of a hologram, her cheeks were slick with obvious tears and her normally perfect bob of neat blonde hair was wavy and disheveled. Her eyes came to focus on Ren; when they did, they brimmed with tears that somehow managed to hold themselves at bay.

"Mama?" Ren said, the familiar name she used showing just how close she was with my mother. "Mama, what's wrong?"

"It's Dani," Mom said. Her voice cracked on my name. "Dani… she's been attacked. She's in the hospital."

I felt Ren stagger; I felt her chest hitch when breath refused to course down her suddenly tense throat. She put her hand atop the hard metal shell of her HoloBook to steady herself. To me, the HoloBook contraption would have looked like a folded laptop had I not seen it unfurl like a flower and beam holographic computer interfaces into the air only a few moments before.

It struck me in a distant way that I had been right. Ren's world was very, very different from my own.

"What happened?" Ren croaked. Her palms were sweaty and slick, sliding across the HoloBook's smooth carapace. Her legs gave out and she sat down in her chair with a thud.

As my mother forced out a short description of my attack, I noticed that Ren was in a small room with a cot, a desk, and a hard folding chair. It didn't look like a dorm room; it looked like a barrack. If I was being attacked it meant Ren was in school too, didn't it?

_No,_ I remembered. _In this world, Ren lied to me. She was working with the government while I was in school._

"…they took her to the hospital and got her heart started up in the ambulance, but now they have her in surgery and… Lauren, we're trying to book Transporter tickets, but it's so last minute that…"

"I can be with her in an hour," Ren said. She stood up straight; Mom's face registered surprise.

"But Lauren, Transporter tickets—"

"I can get them." Her fist clenched atop the HoloBook. She was utterly certain when she said: "Trust me."

A new memory swam in to replace the old one; colors and shapes melted and refroze into new colors and new shapes, and I was looking at a face I recognized but had not seen in several years. The blonde hair worn in a tight chignon, the pointed chin, the hard blue eyes, the crimson lips that were as pretty as they were cruel—

Ren's mother, Catharine, looked at Ren with equal parts contempt and compassion, a feat I did not know to be capable before then. "Dani got what?" she asked in her harsh alto voice, and Ren ground out a short explanation of my attack. She didn't babble, smile, or emote in front of her mother. Their time of camaraderie had died in Ren's childhood.

"I need Transporter tickets," Ren said when she finished saying what had happened. Her tone was blunt and unforgiving.

Catharine's eyes turned hard behind their half-circle glasses.

"You have clearance," Ren continued. "You never used it to visit me, but I know you have it."

Because I knew Ren I could detect a level of pain in those words, but to the outside observer she probably just seemed blank. Catharine, however, knew Ren almost as well as I did, although she didn't use that knowledge for good.

"Still holding that against me?" she asked in a silky tone.

"It's hard to forget that your own mother refused to see you for thirteen years," Ren said.

Catharine's lips cut a smile. "Got you to come here, didn't it?"

Ren stiffened just a little. The history with her mother was a complex one, but I knew the ins and outs of it so I knew how much Ren had to be hurting in that moment. Ren and Catharine had been incredibly close when Ren was younger; they had probably been even closer than me and my mother. That closeness was not meant to last, however—Catharine was a famous academic, and when Ren was about seven or so her mother dropped Ren off at an aunt's house and never came back for her. She sent postcards, of course, and she'd call on Ren's birthday and on Christmas, but that line of communication wasn't nearly enough for Ren, especially when the postcards became less frequent and the calls stopped coming entirely as the years went by.

Ren, even as a little kid, had been blessed with a superior intelligence. She elected not to skip grades ahead and stayed in the same class as me when we were in lower school, but the schoolwork she was given was designed by private tutors and was worlds above what I had to do. The only work we had in common was the fun stuff, like arts and crafts and music lessons; Ren's guardian, her aunt, had wanted her to interact with children her own age so as not to stunt her emotional development. In highschool, Ren took supplementary college courses at the graduate level and worked with professors on research projects. I often asked her why she didn't just relax before going off to a real college, but her answer was always the same. If she got good enough grades, if she was outstanding enough, if she could make her mother proud—well, maybe Catharine would come back.

Catharine never did, of course. They stayed unconnected despite Ren's laundry list of academic achievements—

—or had they?

That had been in my world. In this one… Ren and Catharine had contact, here in this cold barrack. What had changed?

I put the pieces together in my head. If Catharine had left Ren when Ren was seven, and Ren mentioned not seeing her mother for thirteen years… Ren would be twenty at the time of this memory, at the time I had been stabbed, and that made sense. But what had Catharine meant when she said that not seeing Ren had "gotten Ren here"?

_This is probably the top-secret project Ren was doing when she said she was going to college,_ I realized. _She was working with her mother. I wonder how that worked out._

"You could have just told me," Ren was saying.

"You know I couldn't have," Catharine replied, and then she shrugged. "But you're here. That's all that matters."

A thought struck me—probably because I could feel Ren's thoughts pushing vaguely at the fringes of my own. Ren's mother had cut off contact with Ren because she wanted Ren to work hard enough to get into the same program, which was top secret. She wanted Ren's desire to see her mother again to drive Ren to excellence. The plot had apparently worked, but at the cost of their relationship. I could feel Ren mourning this, although she refused to express as much in front of the woman who had betrayed her.

Ren's heart broke a little when Catharine turned back to her work and spoke over her shoulder, without looking at her daughter even one more time.

"About the Transporter…" Catharine said.

* * *

The world melted and reformed again—probably, I reasoned, skipping the mundane memories in favor of the vivid ones, ones like the memory of the pale face surrounded by wires, the face topped by a mop of unruly brown hair. The girl in the bed looked like a corpse, bony and unmoving beneath a thin white sheet. The eyes were dark pits above hollow cheeks; a plastic and metal mask had been taped to the face, obscuring mouth and nose as a large machine aided the body's breathing; small hands lay limp at the body's sides. Ren reached out and tenderly smoothed a lock of hair off the sweating forehead. Behind her, a doctor in a white coat explained what was wrong with the body on the bed—mostly a damaged lung and heart, coupled with massive blood loss and lack of oxygen to the brain for what looked like several minutes before the paramedics arrives and started up the girl's breathing again.

Around me pulsed the pain of grief, and fear.

Ren asked several questions, smart ones, ones only she'd know to ask, and then she got in a small argument with the doctor about his treatment ideas. She didn't try to win the fight and instead slumped into a chair at the body's bedside, twining her fingers into the bedclothes in a portrait of despair. Her head fell to rest on the girl's thigh. Ren smelled only sterile cotton sheets; the figure's usual scent of vanilla shampoo and ink and paper had been washed away by antiseptic.

The doctor touched Ren's shoulder and murmured something, but Ren barely heard the words of hope because she was busy trying to wake up the girl in the bed with her thoughts alone.

When the doctor left, Ren stood and stared down at the body's face—at _my_ face, because I had become so lost in Ren that I had forgotten about myself until she began to untangle my damp hair with fingers that shook.

* * *

Ren was in my dorm room in the next memory. My roommate stood in the doorway as Ren went through my desk drawers and packed an overnight bag. She was quiet as she pulled some posters off the walls and rolled them carefully into a cardboard tube.

"We'd like to visit, if we could," my roommate said.

Ren looked at her over her shoulder. My roommate smiled.

"We've been sending flowers, but we haven't been allowed into the hospital," she said. "They said they'd let us once she stabilizes. Will you keep us posted? I can give you my Comm number."

Ren took the number without saying anything. When she turned to leave, my stuff in tow, my roommate reached out to touch Ren's arm.

"She talked about you a lot," she said. "Dani, I mean. It's silly, but I feel like we're already friends, so if there's anything I can do…"

Ren didn't—couldn't—say a word. She just accepted my roommate's offered hug and tried to hold back tears.

* * *

NOTES:

_I AM SO BEHIND ON SHOUT-OUTS. _

_ The first is to BadLuckCat. She has started a project that frequently reduces me to a gibbering lump of happiness—she's illustrating each chapter of Future Talk, taking a main event from the chapter and bringing it to life! Her work is super cool so please, check her out!_

_ Shoutout #2: Rinrei has begun to turn Future Talk into a comic! I could hardly believe it when she approached me about the idea. She has a few concept pages and the first two pages of the story posted on her deviantART profile; please do keep up with her for future stuff!_

_ Shoutout #3: I was gifted the best Xmas present in the world by 13LuckyWishes (and Arsenic Blue, BadLuckCat, Bluey Katt, Ciffira, devilangelwolf27, Harpokatt, hieisdarkdragonchick, krrib, Madame Blaze, Masuyo-Shun, MisstressxJade, MisuzuPM, Myra Mew, PyroNinja999, Ray-Lin, Razorgaze, RinRei,, That Pokemon Freak, Tokyotimekiller, Tooty-Scooty, Wolfster14, Zetsubel). It's a video depicting the friendship of Ren and Dani, set to the song "Time After Time", and it reduced me to tears within, like, six-point-three seconds. OMG, guys. OMG. Please go watch the video and shower the contributors with praise. I was so floored to receive such a thoughtful, meaningful gift, and I want to share it with you all. _

_Many, MANY thanks to the readers of the last chapter. I was absolutely floored by the quickness of the response; I wasn't expecting a big turnout since I'd taken so long of a break, and the fact that the last chapter got so much love was just magical. You guys rock my socks in a box with a fox at Fort Knox: colbub, x-Beyond-B, Of Lost Thoughts, darkravensnight, moani-sama, Da Capo al Coda, Kaiya's Watergarden, undercoverprep, Evie Owns the TARDIS, ThatOneChickk, cranberryben, Eggbert 3000, Out-Of-Control-Authoress, hellaboss, HowCouldThisHappenToMe, Silvereyes25, Snowgirl7589, Caralirani, StrawberryHuggles, Yoko Kiara14, MusicFiend666, chocolateluvr13, Doily Rox,ShadowFireFox13, Yuki, J.C Pennywise, Emerald Gaze, Kushiel's Fallen, Zetsubel, tazdevil, Angel of Randomosity, PurplePurplePurple, NAO-chan33, Captain Lupin Ferus, MysticChaos, Misuzu-PM, Takara Rose Oizumi, rain chant, ephemeral violet, Koryu Elric, Eirdaru, flamingmarsh, MissMargret, howling wolf mika, Teacup Kitty, luv4anome202, spiritfoxxx821, DaAmazingMeepers, Shiningheart of the ThunderClan, Elegant Lady of Sin, Dude wheres my spirit gun, OhhTaylorJade, KayTeeCee, iiceangel3.0, nevvy, thatsnotmyname, Amanda Fair, Turtle Kid the Woolgatherer, sesshomaruluver1, j.d.y., staidwaters, awesome story, Ry171819, Mrs. Pargo21, Yaoi-beloved, KattJeane!_

_ I promise the next chapter will be longer and that the truth will be revealed (finally, right?). I just felt I needed to post SOMETHING, and this has been ready for weeks now, so… yeah. Weekly updates should be starting again soon!_


	80. Chapter 80: Sleepyhead

Future Talk

Chapter 80:

"Sleepyhead"

* * *

Ren decorated my hospital room with the flowers from my friends, the posters from my dorm, and the drawings she had made herself after she brought my things to the hospital. Hers were simple drawings, more decorated words than actual art. They bore phrases like "You can do it!" and pictures of cheering crowds etched with ballpoint pen, faces colored haphazardly with the crayons she begged off one of the nurses in the children's ward (an act which, when observed from inside Ren's head, I realized wasn't at all calculated; her childlike pout and her projected sadness were as genuine as sunshine). She smiled when she put her work all around my bed and tried to make the room homey. Ren spoke to my sleeping form while it slept, chattering on about how my parents were coming across many state lines to get to me and how the very best doctors around were going to make sure I would wake up again as good as new.

"And besides, I'm here," Ren declared when she finished setting up my hospital room. "If I got picked for my mother's program—"

She stopped speaking, then, midway through folding a stack of my shirts she later meant to put into the chest of drawers under the room's single window. Guilt crept over her in a wave; each time Ren was reminded of how she'd lied to me about where she'd gone in lieu of college, a little part of her couldn't help but cringe. Looking at my passive face and the tubes snaking into my mouth and nose, Ren felt even worse lying to my comatose body than she had all the times she'd lied about classes when we'd called one another on the phone, her at the military base at which she worked, me at the college at which I studied. When she lied to me over the phone, it had felt like she was merely keeping a secret for my own good. Lying to me when I was very near dead, Ren felt as though she were committing an act of treason. There I lay, dying, and Ren was still lying. This could be her last opportunity to tell her best friend, her soulmate and almost-sister, the truth about everything she'd kept hidden, and she was wasting the moment on deception.

It took Ren a little while to come to a decision, one she hadn't anticipated making when she came to take care of me. She folded my clothes with jerking hands and stiff fingers, thinking hard, but her resolve solidified as she finished putting everything neatly away. Taking a long look at my pale face beneath its plastic mask, she crossed the room and poked her head into the hallway. The coast was clear; I had stabilized long before then and my vitals were hooked up to an alarm system in case something went horribly wrong. Nurses needn't linger too close to my room unless they heard the telltale sirens. Ren gently shut the door and flipped the deadbolt, feeling it snap into place under the turn of her hand. The firm click steeled her.

"Dani," Ren said, hand still resting on the deadbolt, "I've got somethin' to say."

She turned and looked at me. My body did not move. Her expression was sheepish, but her hands were steady as she dragged a chair to my side and picked up my left hand. The fingers were stiff and cold; Ren chafed them, trying to put warmth back in the icy joints. She felt as if my fingers were warmed just enough, I might wake.

"I didn't get accepted to a school in New York," Ren said softly. She kept her eyes locked on my face, looking for signs of recognition beneath the breathing apparatus (I assumed that's what that futuristic device was) taped to my jawline. "Well, I did. But I didn't go, not like I told you I did. I'm sorry for lyin' to ya, but I was sworn to secrecy and so—"

She paused for a second. Her hands tightened around my body's—I mean, the other Dani's fingers. Her other hand came up to touch my cheek.

The sensation of looking at myself through Ren's eyes was as dizzying as looking into a kaleidoscope of foreign languages, like strange words jumbled up into a visible conglomeration of disorientation. I struggled against the frightening sensation of duality, remembering in a rush that Ryu was causing me to see all the things Ren had once lived through, but no matter how hard I tried to push my consciousness away from Ren's I remained held fast. With the mental equivalent of a shuddered sigh I allowed myself to sink into Ren even deeper, hoping to bury myself in her rather than wage war on something I couldn't hope to avoid—and then suddenly I was no more, a blip on a horizon no one in the world could comprehend.

I cuddled down into Ren—into Lauren. I let myself become her, and see like a fly on a wall.

* * *

Lauren touched Dani's face with her thumb. "The truth is that I got recruited," she told the body in the bed. "My mama, you remember my mama, well, it turns out she was watchin' my work, watchin' my progress through school and science and all of that." Lauren let out a laugh that was cold, remembering the sting of the unforgiving words her mother had spoken only hours before in a sterile laboratory. "She left 'cause she wanted me to chase after her, which is exactly what I did. I chased. And right after I started college in New York I got a letter from the government. It said that by my mama's recommendation, I had been elected to…"

At that, Lauren lowered her voice and got up so she could kneel on the hospital bed. She leaned over Dani's body and put her mouth close to the unhearing ear, brushing brown hair out of the way. Her words were guarded but full of fire.

"Dani," she said, "my mother is working to destroy the world. I'm working to save it."

When Dani did not react, Lauren pulled away. She couldn't help the feeling of disappointment that washed over her; if that little revelation hadn't woken Dani up, what would?

Lauren only allowed herself a moment to mope. Resolving that being sad wouldn't help matters, Lauren settled herself on the bed and kept her hands clenched in Dani's blankets. She glanced once toward the door, green eyes wary, before looking back at her friend.

"I'm not supposed to tell you this," she said. "It's highly classified information, but as soon as I say it you'll realize you saw it coming." A deep breath, a low sigh. Her heart beat a little faster. "The cold war between the Pro-Expansion Party and the Preservationists is heating up, and it's heating up into what might become a real war soon enough. Mexico joined the US and the rest of the PEP just two days ago, right before you got… hurt." A flash of painful regret made Lauren wince, but she soldiered on. "There's been rioting over the food shortage and the rising cost of transporter tickets, but we've mined all the fuel on this continent and we just can't operate the way we used to. We have too many people to support at our current resource level."

Lauren paused for a long time, hand coming up and turning to rub at her temples with middle finger and thumb. She eyed Dani's heart monitor and brainwave pattern for a few moments, trying to spot signs of wakefulness. She found nothing.

"Now that Mexico's gotten cozy with the PEP," she continued when she realized no response was coming, "Canada and the folks down in Brazil have started issuing little warnings, telling the PEP to knock it off and settle their people—all while primin' warheads and polishin' their doomsday buttons. But the PEP isn't listenin' to the threats." Lauren pursed her lips. "Of course it's not listening. But you can't say the Expansionists aren't smart. They saw the Preservationists' threats coming, saw the war on its way." She took a deep breath and, in a rush, said: "Right as I started my college career I got a letter that said my mother had recommended me for cryogenics research." She chuckled a little. "The Expansionists want to create their own little brand of preservationism. It's ironic, when you think about it. They're producing weapons to keep up with Canada and the other Preservationists, but they don't actually want war to break out. It'd kill everyone. The prototype weaponry my mother is working on…"

Lauren trailed off, troubled and frustrated. "To tell the truth," she said, "I have no idea what my mama's workin' on. She won't tell me. I'm just supposed to be developing a system to save lives should her weapon ever be used. I'm like the failsafe. If we're gonna bomb ourselves off the face of the planet, we gotta make sure we guarantee a few survivors, even if maybe this planet is better off without us on it in the first place."

Lauren stood up, moving toward the door. She unlocked it and flipped off the overhead light; the sun was going down outside the window, casting long shadows and orange glow. Lauren pulled herself gently into the bed with Dani, molding her longer body around Dani's smaller one like an overprotective mastiff guarding the family child.

"I'm sorry I lied to you," she said while stroking Dani's hair. "I know I shouldn't have. But this cold war we've got going on, it's ugly. And I didn't want to expose you to any more ugliness than was absolutely necessary. You would have learned everything when it hit the papers. I mean, that can't be long in comin', it's a _war_, but still, I just…"

At that, Lauren felt her eyes sting a little. She placed her hand over the lump on Dani's ribcage, the one distending the light blue hospital gown Dani had been draped in. This, Lauren knew, was the bandaged spot where surgical incisions had opened Dani up to repair her damaged organs. Lauren hated the feel of the bandages as much as she appreciated how they were keeping her friend from bleeding to death in her arms.

"Seems I did a crappy job of keepin' you safe, darlin,'" Lauren murmured. "I'm so sorry."

* * *

Dani's parents arrived the next morning. Traffic had been terrible; with the transporters down Rails had become the in-thing again, and the Lines had a hard time handling the unaccustomed rush. Pamela and Charles looked sweaty and irritable when they met Lauren in the hospital lobby, but neither of them let their discomfort show as Lauren drew them into a tight group hug.

At the sight of their faces, Lauren grasped for good news—any good news. "I was on the phone with the police chief earlier," she said when the three broke apart. "They caught the guy who did it. Found him running around the neighborhood; had the girl Dani saved pick him out of a line-up." Lauren clapped her hands down onto Dani's parents' shoulders. "He's not going anywhere. And the girl—her name is Sarah, by the way, and Sarah is calling Dani her hero. So are the police and the local news people."

Lauren didn't mention that Sarah hadn't been by to visit her savior because she didn't know if Sarah ever would. The girl had rushed to her parents' home a few states away after the accident, eager to get to comforting territory. Still, Lauren felt righteously angry about the whole affair. Didn't Dani at least deserve a "thank you"?

"Damn right, my little girl's a hero," Charles growled. Though he was a small man who wore oval glasses over boyish features, he still managed to appear menacing as he spoke. "I'll call the DA later, see what I can do on the legal offense. We'll get this guy, no question."

"I don't care about any of that," Pamela said. She wrung her hands, holding back a spill of tears. "I just want to see my little girl."

Lauren nodded and took Pamela's hand, leading the woman to the check-in desk. By then the nurses knew exactly who Lauren was; they greeted her by name and with smiles, smiles that faded when they recognized with whom she walked. The resemblance between Dani and her parents was unmistakable, even to strangers—Lauren actually wished she bore some resemblance to the Thompson family; that would certainly maker her connection to Dani, her truest family, all the simpler.

As the parents filled out paperwork, Lauren studied them and wondered, hoping that Dani would wake up for her mother and father. Lauren couldn't bear to see them hurt. They had been more of a mother and father to her than her own mother ever had. They didn't deserve any of this, and she hated to see them cry.

Cry they did, though, when Dani did not wake when they called her name. And Lauren cried with them, lost.

* * *

Two weeks passed—two nailing-biting weeks during which Lauren felt she might go insane from lack of proper productive action and overabundance of pure worry.

Lauren seemed to be the only one with nothing to do. Charles and Pamela both somehow managed to keep busy, an impossible feat in Lauren's view. Charles worked untiringly with the local authorities and hired the best lawyer in the area to prosecute Dani's attacker. Pamela fussed over Dani's body and went to the college every day to pick up Dani's missed schoolwork. Lauren, feeling useless, talked to Dani at a near constant rate. She told her about the weather, about politics. She read Dani books and told Dani stories she made up on the spot. She watched movies with the coma patient, described what came up on screen, and discussed the flawed movie science with forced gusto.

Dani never moved. Lauren never let herself waver, even when things seemed bleak.

* * *

Two weeks and one day into the coma, there came a disheartening revelation for Lauren and the Thompson family.

Oddly enough, it came in the form of truly excellent news.

The news was this: Dani had been accepted into a competitive composition program hosted by her school. Lauren remembered hearing Dani talk about the program almost every day during her freshman year of college; Pamela remembered the same, but the program hadn't been open to freshmen at the time. Now that Dani was a sophomore it appeared she had applied. It was rare for sophomores to make it into the program—had Dani been awake, this would have been a cause for celebration. She wasn't awake, though, and couldn't celebrate at all. She couldn't even know about her success. All her parents could do was tell her unconscious body that it had done something good while it slept, and all Lauren could do was wish that the good news had been about Dani's condition and not some stupid music workshop.

Ren couldn't help but feel like the universe was working against her, somehow. She didn't believe in fate, destiny, or god. She believed in science, math, and logic. Quantum entanglement was as close to pseudo-science as she would ever get, but as she thought about the timing of it all, she wondered if someone out there, someone with power, someone in some far-flung reach of the cosmos, hated her fucking guts. First to take Dani away, and then to taunt her with this missed opportunity—

"Congratulations, sleepyhead," Pamela had told her daughter through a shaking smile. "You did so good."

* * *

When Dani finally did wake, it was without fanfare or undue fuss. Lauren hardly remembered the details of the incident; it had happened quickly, while no one was actually looking at Dani. The most memorable attribute of the waking was that it had made everyone happy, a drastic change from the family's usual gloomy mood. Lauren spent the next few days walking on proverbial air, whistling at every step, even though Dani faded in and out of sleep and was never awake for very long.

It happened like this: Lauren had been sleeping in the spare bed (Dani had long since been moved out of the ICU and into a private room) when she found herself being shaken into wakefulness by Dani's mother and the scream of an alarm—Lauren knew the sound, she knew it indicated a flatline, that the patient had no pulse, and Lauren was awake in a second and stumbling toward Dani's bed in a blind panic. Pamela grabbed at her arms, though, and pointed at the bed, smiling and saying something in a whisper as loud as a shout. Lauren couldn't make out the words so she shook herself more awake, looked through seeing eyes, and _saw_. She put her hand to her mouth, grinning through a sob as Pamela rushed into the hallway to find Charles.

To Lauren, the scene smacked of miracles. Nothing had ever looked sweeter than this, as sweet Dani lying on her side, breathing tubes tossed unceremoniously over the side of her bed, sleeping a natural sleep.

* * *

"Where?"

That was Dani's first question, posed to her father during one of her bouts of lucidity. She was on enough medication to keep her from ever coming fully awake, no matter how badly she wanted to. Lauren wanted to reduce the pain meds in Dani's system but she knew that the pain would be too much for Dani to handle just yet. The knife had punctured her lung and nicked her heart, after all. Pain was to be expected, as was the coughing fit Dani succumbed to after speaking that single word.

"You're in a hospital," Charles had told her after the coughs died down. He gripped her hand tight while Pam stood on Dani's other side, looking down at her daughter with a patient smile. "You were hurt. Do you remember anything?"

Dani's head lolled to one side, eyelids dropping. "Nngh…"

She fell back to sleep.

* * *

Over the next few days Dani managed to stay awake longer and ask more questions. Sometimes she remembered the answers from waking period to waking period. Sometimes she forgot and asked the same things twice, three times, four. But everyone was patient, and Lauren began writing facts down on a pad of hospital stationary and placing it at Dani's bedside. That way, she reasoned, if Dani woke up and was alone, she could learn what she needed herself.

Provided she had the strength to reach the stationary at all.

* * *

Lauren wanted to make life as easy as possible for Dani and, by extension, her parents. She knew the waking-up and healing process was going to be a bitch, pain meds or no pain meds, and that Dani would need her mother and father's support if she was to get through it with minimal stress. While Dani did not need more surgery (everything had been suitably repaired in her first round of surgery after the attack), she was still quite weak and prone to drifting into random sleep. There were tests to be taken to determine her continued levels of health, medications to inject to ensure her prolonged health, and doctors that wanted to talk to her to make sure of her intact mental health.

So, to ensure the fewest distractions, Lauren went to the Laundromat for everyone, managed the parents' hotel room, consulted with the doctors and police and media, and found non-hospital food (_AKA: non-yuck food,_ in Lauren's humble opinion) while Charles and Pamela sat vigil at Dani's side. Lauren knew that no matter how close she and Dani were, there was no substitute for your mother and father when you were in pain.

She knew because she knew the pain of not having either, and she didn't want that for her Dani.

At the back of her mind, however, Lauren wanted to do more. The little touches and the helpful errands and staying largely out of the way, those things weren't enough. Those weren't it. Lauren wanted to march down to the police station and haul Dani's attacker into the street, scream at him, tell the world what he'd done to her best friend and watch as he was burned alive by an angry mob.

The helplessness was killing her.

The calls she was getting on her Comm unit late at night from blocked numbers—the calls where someone asked when she was going to "get back to work on her very important project"—didn't make her feel any more in control.

* * *

Dani's voice, before the accident, had been a smooth and pretty (if not simple) soprano. Dani's voice, after the accident, had been reduced to a withered, guttural squeak. She could hardly bear to pass air through her throat to project words, such was the pain in her lung, and whenever she spoke for long she started to wheeze and cough. Lauren didn't want Dani to speak much at all, not at first, but she hadn't seen Dani in so long that she couldn't help but talk to her.

"I was so worried when your mom called," Lauren said. She was arranging a vase of flowers by the window; the daisies were a get-well gift from Dani's college. "Seriously, near 'bout had a panic attack when I got the news that you'd been… well, you know."

She turned to look at her friend. Dani was staring into nothingness, pale face as blank as paper.

"Dan?" Lauren asked. She moved away from the flowers and took a step toward the bed. "Do you… wanna talk about it?"

Dani started, blinking rapidly—but then she settled back into her mattress and shot Lauren an apologetic smile. Her eyes were still distant; Lauren noted this the way you note a persistent paper cut.

Dani shook her head slowly, managing to wheeze the words: "Not yet."

She began coughing immediately afterward. Lauren rushed over and handed her a glass of water with a straw.

No matter how hard Lauren, Charles, or Pamela tried in the days that followed, Dani would not talk about the attack.

* * *

The police were allowed into the hospital one week after Dani woke up. They had wanted to come the minute Dani woke, but Lauren had been adamant about keeping them away from until Dani was stronger. When Lauren privately deemed Dani ready to face them, she asked Pamela and Charles if they thought letting the police question their daughter was a good idea. Lauren didn't really want them to say yes, but they did say yes, provided Dani's lawyer could be present.

"No sense not having her around, for what I'm paying," Charles joked.

Dani was not, however, strong enough to give her entire statement verbally, nor did she seem at all inclined to talk about her experiences to begin with. When her parents broached the subject of the attack, Dani turned her head to face the wall and closed her eyes. She did the same with both Lauren and the same when two plain-clothes detectives who sat at her bedside and pleaded for an hour for her testimony.

The only thing she seemed willing to do was pick her attacker out of a six pack—Lauren was delighted to learn that "six pack" was the term for the sample of six pictures the detectives presented to Dani in hopes she could identify her attacker out of all offered subjects. It was like the "line-up" Lauren often saw on crime shows, but without the physical guys standing in a line.

"Well, that's our guy," one detective said when Dani pointed at the man who had stabbed her. "Even if you don't give a statement, this is likely enough to have him sentenced. It's a mostly open-and-shut case." He gave Dani a pleading look and a small smile. "But a statement, miss—that really would help."

"Don't you want to see the man who could do such bad things put away for good?" the other detective said with far more force than was necessary. (Lauren wondered if they were going for the good-cop/bad-cop routine, or if one really was just nicer than the other.) "Wouldn't you feel terrible if he got off, all because you couldn't just open your mouth and—"

"That's enough!" snapped Dani's lawyer. She was a commanding woman with grey hair and a purple pantsuit; Lauren loved and would never forget that pantsuit. "She's still recovering. We'll try again later." Though seemingly supportive, the lawyer gave Dani a harsh look. "We _will_ try again later, won't we?"

Dani's eyes fell shut. Her expression remained impassive. She made no move to reply.

* * *

In order to keep Dani's lung in shape, she needed to complete several rounds of painful breathing exercises a day. The point was to keep her scar tissue flexible, so she could take full, deep breaths without painful stretching once she was healed. Keeping her awake long enough to do these exercises was, at first, impossible, but as Dani's health and strength improved she managed to begin working on them.

However, her wounds cycled viciously into one another, making getting started at all a challenge. At first, when the pain from her breathing set in, her heart would start beating rapidly and flood her body with adrenaline. Given that she already had an arrhythmia and now an actual wound on her heart, she would end up exhausted and panting within seconds. The panting would then inflame the lung, forcing her to cough and experience more pain, which would set the heart off again. The key was to keep her calm and relaxed.

This was not an easy feat.

After one particularly bad exercise session, Dani lay on her side in bed with her knees pulled up to her chest. No matter how Lauren tried, she couldn't get Dani to uncurl her body.

"Dani, you're closin' off your lungs when you lay like that!" Lauren pleaded. She hooked her fingers into the back of Dani's nightgown and tried to pull her over. "Please, lie flat… or just sit up, please!"

Dani didn't budge. Lauren sat back and puffed up her cheeks with air. She blew out the air with a sigh. Her hands came up, frustrated, because what was Dani thinking? She was going to kill herself at this rate!

Lauren decided to voice that opinion aloud. "Fine, you wanna kill yourself all over again? Be my guest! But don't come cryin' to me when you suffocate and—" She stopped speaking, feeling utterly confused, and then she breathed the phrase: "Well for heaven's sake!"

Dani had rolled over and sat up, elbows shaking as they tried to support the weight of her torso. Her face had twisted itself into a tense mask, lower lip trembling; Lauren knew that meant tears were on their way. Dani's lips always pushed together into a little white bundle and shook before she cried.

"Aw shucks, I didn't mean to hurt your feelin's," Lauren explained. She sat next to Dani on the hospital bed and put her arm around the smaller girl. "I was just tryin' to help, that's all, I promise, you can curl up however you like, darlin'."

Lauren waited for a reply. She didn't get one. Dani just stared at the wall across from the bed, trying hard not to cry. Lauren reached up and smoothed unbound hair out of Dani's eyes, eyes that held a grave expression that didn't match the comparatively light situation at all. Lauren hadn't said anything _that_ bad, had she? She certainly didn't think she'd been cause for tears!

Although Lauren had never fooled herself into believing she was socially savvy, even she knew what was in front of her. Something more than a bad therapy session was bothering Dani—and it was something major. Something huge. Dani looked as though she were watching someone threaten to tear a world full of her loved ones apart, was watching those loved ones get _tortured_, even, but had been forbidden to cry about it on pain of their deaths. That was the best comparison Lauren could fashion. She thought it was pretty good.

"Hey," Lauren said. She ducked her head closer to her friend's. "Hey, hey, don't look like that. You're okay. We've all gotcha. You're safe now."

She felt the shudder ripple through Dani's body before she saw that grave, tearful expression break like a cracking mask of stone. Dani's tense face spilled in on itself and collapsed into a grimace so extreme it looked more befitting of a cartoon character than a flesh and blood human being. Dani wrenched toward Lauren and threw her arms around the blonde's neck, sobbing into Lauren's chest—Lauren's arms went around her on reflex, hands rubbing Dani's back in what Lauren hoped was a soothing manner. The sobs made Dani start coughing, though, and Lauren had to push Dani back onto the bed to open up her throat to breathe. Lauren's insides twisted with pity, confusion, and quiet desperation as Dani fought to balance her crying with her breathing, but to little avail. Eventually the girl just lapsed into an exhausted doze, chest hitching on occasion—if it was hitching from tears or coughs, Lauren couldn't tell. Everything about Dani had blurred into one massive expression of unconquerable grief.

Grief?

Lauren recognized the emotion. Dani's face had reflected grief, no question. Lauren had felt that emotion around the clock before Dani woke up; she felt she'd be an idiot if she _didn't_ recognize that grief for what it was. But for all her ability to identify that sensation, Lauren couldn't figure one thing out—just what was it that Dani missed so intensely, and where had that something gone?

* * *

NOTES:

_ I'm sorry this is so short compared to how long you waited for it, but I liked this as a cut-off point. I hope to start updating more frequently from now on. These Lauren chapters are hard to write; I really don't like third person after writing in the first for so long! But we have a lot of ground to cover in her shoes, so I'm going to stick it out._

_I can't believe we're on chapter 80. At one point I said this would be 40 or so chapters long. LOL PSYCHE. Urgh. No._

_ I'm going to disclaim the fact that I know NOTHING about biology or medicine. So, any and all (probably major) flaws with Dani's treatment and therapy are my fault, because I'm a dunderheaded creative writing major and philosophy minor. _

_This won't matter too much in the long run, but here's a handy glossary of Alternate-Past-America terminology._

_Preservationists:__ Canada and most of South America. These countries united under the idea that they should NOT expand their reaches into the untouched natural worlds of Asia, Europe, Australia, and Africa._

_Pro-Expansion Party (PEP):__ America, some South American countries, and Mexico. These countries united under the principle that they SHOULD expand their reaches into the untouched natural worlds of Asia, Europe, Australia, and Africa._

_Transporters:__ Think of an airport. Where there should be airplanes, insert mass-teleportation terminals. _

_Rails:__ Kind of like trains, only ones you drive yourself and they carry limited passengers. Like a personal car that has a set track you can't deviate from (no off-roading whatsoever). You control the speed, though I imagine there's an auto-drive function._

_Lines:__ The tracks Rails ride on. _

_Comm. Unit:__ This was in both the previous chapter and this chapter. Think of a personal cell phone that can project holograms and access a global communication network (AKA, internet!). Looks like a watch, a ring, a book, or another object, but it's usually jewelry. _

_HoloBook:__ This was in the previous chapter, but it's basically a laptop that projects virtual screens into the air around the user. The screens are controlled by "touching" them. _

_ In other news, I've been published! It's just a short story, but it's something, and I'm super excited._

_You are all far too good to me. Really. I don't think you know just how much I value the tremendous response you've given this story and, by extension, myself. I had no idea I'd hear from so many wonderful people when I started writing this, and now that I have, I feel incredibly humbled by your support. I could never have gotten this far without you. That goes to people who review, the people who silently read, and the people who have contacted me in person for many varied reasons. Your collective presence has been nothing short of miraculous. Thank you very, very much for this gift._

_ Thanks to those who reviewed the last chapter: sesshomaruluver1, Takara Rose Oizumi, Of Lost Thoughts, Katt Jeane, Ephemeral Violet, PurplePurplePurple, Yoko Kiara14, Shining Heart of the Thunder Clan, Eirdaru, octoberbird, flamingmarsh, Evie Owns the Pseudonym, Reyka Sivao, Emerald Gaze, rain chant, J.C. Jackals, Caralirani, chocolateluvr13, Dragon of Twilight, xWings of the Moonx, Zetsubel, Angel of Randomosity, Mystic Chaos, Kaiya's Watergarden, Captain Lupin Ferus, In The Arms of a Thief, Kushiel's Fallen, OhhTaylorJade, N. M. Marquette, Shadow Fire Fox 13, Koryu Elric, Hiei's Dark Dragon Chick, J.D.Y., Quelara, Snowgirl7589, dongaro, Yaoi-Beloved, NeonStarShine, Guest, Serendipital, Nani-san, individuality-has-a-name-me, Random Citizen, I'm My Own No One Else's, Suzume Sai Suzuki, x-Beyond-B, Kima-Rose, AnglBunny, N, DaAmazingMeepers, DevilAngelWolf27, Kaycee, HappyAlways, Esprgirl, Insidious Bunny, x3s Yellowie, spirit821, vic90, lazymay, PenNameNine, ShadowDmn, BiblioMatsuri, The Purple Peacock, Sol_


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